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bangchansgirlsblog · 6 months

Note

Can I please request Skz x 9th member with s3lfh4rm like…the boys trying to help and all those things (you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to)

The stages of healing.

warning: eating disorder and mentions of self harm.

Pairing: Skz x 9th member

Summary: the stages are healing are hard but Chan and the boys are here for you.

!not proofread!

Hope you enjoy this bby!

-🩷

"Baby you have to eat something" Chan says while pushing the plate back to my side of the table.

We were currently sat in the dining room and everyone had finished eating their breakfast leaving me and chan (who had also finished eating his breakfast) alone.

"Chan I don't want too, I'm full" I complain while looking at the full plate infront of me. It was obviously untouched but i could'nt bring myself to eat it. It was taunting me.

"You only had two bites and we have training all day today, I don't want you passing out my love. You need to eat something," He says while rubbing my back. He was being gentle i cant lie there but the worryb and frustration in his voice caused me to feel more guilthy at the fact that my brain was a constant maze and battle zone when it came to eating

"Look you can atleast just eat the mashed potatoes and peas so you can give you energy. Trust me it wont be bad," He tries to reason with me but I shake my head no. I was so full and food gave me so much anxiety.

I didn't want to grow fat, I wouldn't allow it.

"Channie I don't want too, please don't make me." I beg him while fiddling with my fingers.

"Baby, I'm starting to get worried. You only have one meal a day and when you do, you barely eat. Please don't make me forcefully feed you." his voice was soft and his touch was so warm. i knew he meant well bu the contant voices in my head wouldnt allow me to do anything.

I look at him terrified, mortified because would he really? I knew Chan was stronger than me but he wouldn't pin me down just to make me eat...right?

"Okay Mashed potatoes only." I sigh looking at the plate. Trying not to cry.

"There we go Babygirl" he smiles and kisses my temple. His eyes twinkle and i couldnt help but also smile at how pretty he was.

"what?" he asks chuckling

"your just so pretty"

"ugh stop changing the subject and eat" his cheeks were now a ligh pink and his ears turned a dark red. he rolls his eyes playfully and runs his hand through his hair.

"Yo Chan," Han says coming into the room and looking over at me and Chan. He gives him "the look".

"Is she having trouble eating again?" Han asks worried and Chan nods his head.

"But it's fine she's eating her potatoes today.”

Han smiles at that and comes over to ruffle my hair.

“I’m proud of you kid.” He beams and I poke out my tongue causing him to laugh.

"Chan can you help me look for the flash drive before we leave?" Han asks,

"Yeah sure, babe eat up. I'll be back." He tells me and leaves the room with Han. I let out a sigh of relief and quickly stand up and dunk all the food into the trash can. My heart was beating because I prayed that Chan would take long looking for the Flash drive but luck wasn't on my side because he came right back into the kitchen.

"Hey-" he stops and looks up from his phone. "are you done?"

"I finished them." I said smiling, well whatever you call a plastic smile. A guilty smile.

"You finished all the mashed potatoes?" He says coming close to me. I nod trying to avoid his eye contact.

"Okay then." He simply says before walking to the trash can.

"N-no don't look in there-" I try to stop him but it's too late. He had already opened it and looked inside. He turned to look at me and he was so mad I could tell.

"Your a liar." He growls. i gulp knowing the concequences of my actions.

"i ate half of them?" i sigh and look up at him. He just shakes his head and lets out a frustrated sigh.

"i dont get it! why dont you want to eat anymore? We were doing so well,"

"is everything okay in here?" Felix's head pops up at the corner of the door.

"she just threw out all her food-"

"again? thats the 4th time this week." he frowns and makes his way into the the room.

"exactly my point,"

"i did eat chan, i ate half the potatoes-" i tug on my long sleeves sweaters and look at the both of them.

He frowns and looks down then back up, searching for my eyes.

“Can I see your wrists?” He asks looking back down at my fingers. His eyes were furrowed. Almost in like a confused way?

My eyes go wide at his request but I quickly shove them away.

“Chan they’re ugly, I don’t want you to see them.” I frown. My voice quivers. The tears that had disappeared were now reappearing.

“Chan I haven’t been cutting I promise-“

“Then let me see, I know you too well my love. Let me see.” His eyes are soft now and were reaching out for both my hands that were covered with my hoodies sleeves.

I sigh and give in. His hands are soft against mine but he pulls up the sleeves. He examines the scars that were now slowly healing. His lips in a soft smile.

“See I told you, I promised you I stopped.”

“Hey hey hey and I’m so proud of you. I just wanted to make sure because I care and love you. You’re doing a good job healing.” his hands wrap around my waist and pull me against his body.

“Ew gross get a room.” Felix says killing our moments. Chan chuckles and pushes him away.

"The cars are here everbody!" Hyunjins voice echoes through the house.

"okay this conversation isnt over yet, here take the banana and we'll talk about it after practice yeah?" he kisses my forhead and hands me the banana before we grab our bags and make our way to the car.

"go ahead eat it, im watching you." chan raises one eyebrow while staring at me. "She still isnt eating?" Leeknow asks after listening to our conversation.

"i am! chans just being a overprotective," i sigh and peel the banana.

"i am not!" he defends himself and i let out a giggle while slowly starting to chew the banana and finishing it. "see i told you," i poke my tongue out at him and he let out a little laugh.

"okay whatever but your still having lunch with me." i mentally sigh dreading the feeling of the banana sitting in my stomach.

i play with chans's silver braclet as we wait to arrive at the jyp building. It didnt take long. It was just a 15 minute ride once we arrived. we all make our way up the building to our normal dance room and set everything up.

"lets start with stretching and then get to God's menu, yeah?" we all groan as we get to our places and minho plays the song.

#skz comfort #skz imagines #skz angst #skz x reader #skz drabbles #skz fluff #skz stay #skz x y/n #skz x you #stray kids drabbles #skz channie #bangchan angst #bangchan x reader #bangchan fluff #bang chan x reader #straykids x reader #stray kids angst #stray kids fluff

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ohmtoff · 3 months

Text

Creep

Nick Sturniolo x OC smut

Summary: Nick tried to take a picture of a hot stranger in the grocery store, but when his flash went off, Ethan, the hot man in question, used Nick’s clumsiness for his own advantage

Contains: Anal sex, bottom!nick, top!oc, oral sex, spanking (very minor, not explicit), unsafe sex, barebacking, unconsensual photo taking, fingering, rimming, hair pulling, light dom/sub, dirty talk, slight crying during sex, overstimulation

Word count: 5,078 words

Disclaimers: minors dni. will contain grammar mistakes, english isn't my first language. this is FICTION, always use protection during sex, never take a pic of a stranger without their consent.

a/n: this was partly made bc i cant get over the idea of larray tara and nick as a trio like IM GNA LOSE IT. the tiktok talked about was (https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSF8YxXn6/) its so funny i need to include it.

——————————————————————————

Nick laughs, reading Larray’s last message about a tiktok he found of a guy pretending to be called gay in middle school and his friend defending him, both of them relating to that video strongly.

He tries to reign in his grin, as he’s on a supermarket trying to buy groceries, and laughing to yourself is just plain weird, so he forces himself to press his lips together as Larray and Tara sent jokes that make his belly hurt. He briefly takes his eyes off the string of messages, hearing a loud cough, and clocks grey sweatpants on strong thighs. He’s interested, immediately, checking out the rest of the tall boy who is standing next to him by the snack aisle, holding onto his cart. A black short sleeved compression shirt defining his strong chest and bicep, complimenting bouncy and slightly curly brown hair, a face adorning deep brown eyes that could pass for both handsome or pretty, and veiny hands that make Nick’s mind wander. He texts the group.

jacob elordi brainrot

Nick: hottest. guy. ever. in the grocery store

Larray: ???? not possible, I’m at home

Tara: ew

Larray: rude

Tara: anyways

Tara: PHOTO

Larray: how hot?

Nick: grey sweats and compression shirt hot

Larray: PHOTO

Tara: PHOTO

Nick: I can’t take a pic guys that’s creepy

Larray: PHOTO

Tara: PHOTO

Nick: No

Tara: come oooonnnn PHOTO

Nick: ugh fine

It didn’t take much for them to convince Nick because he knows he actually really wants to take a picture of the hottie to his right, for scientific purposes of course. Nick makes sure his phone is on silent before he angles it, tipping it back a little as he hopes he captures most of the guy. He tries to look at others on the store, rather than focus on what he’s doing, thumb moving around where he thinks the snapshot button is until – flash – the bright white light of his camera lights up the entire back case of his phone.

Nick feels his heart catch in the back of his throat, and he’s slow in moving his hand, the immediate humiliation making him freeze. He can’t help but look at the stranger, and he sees how he takes in Nick’s obvious creeper shot, Nick feeling the anxiety coarse through him at lightning speed.

He’s fearful as the stranger frowns, stepping over to him, and Nick slightly backs up immediately.

“I’m - ”

“Did you just take a photo of me?” the stranger asks, and Nick thinks his face may melt, the shame of his actions making him lie, shaking his head silently.

“You didn’t?” the stranger asks, even more handsome, prettier, up close, but he’s clearly unimpressed by Nick’s rudeness, and Nick is panicking, brain drawing blanks.

“I…” Nick gapes, looking for the words, “I’m sorry.”

“Why?” the stranger demands forcefully, grabbing Nick’s phone, Nick gasping at that, but too embarrassed to fight it. The boy doesn’t look through Nick’s phone, just holds it and stares at Nick accusingly, Nick having to shrug, truly embarrassed and he feels pairs of eyes on his back judging him.

“Come with me,” the stranger demands, still holding Nick’s phone, making his way to ut of the store, both of their carts abandoned. Nick doesn’t have much of a choice if he values his phone, and he follows, ashamed.

“I am sorry,” he pants, keeping up with the other boy’s pace, “can I have it back?”

The stranger slows down slightly, starting to look through the phone. Nick realises with horror that his phone isn’t locked, as he kept the camera open, and he reaches to grab his phone back, but the stranger is tall, holding it higher as he clicks on the incoming messages.

Larray: PHOTO!!! What’s with the silence girl? You better be sucking his dick!

Tara: PHOTO

The stranger scrolls up, Nick groaning in embarrassment, watching him read Nick’s earlier messages about how hot he is.

“Seriously creepy,” he shakes his head, deep voice just making it even worse as Nick cringes, “you’re perving on me in the store and taking my photo without my consent?”

“I’m genuinely sorry,” Nick said, his voice tinged with guilt, “I’ll delete it immediately and leave.”

The boy is doing something on his phone and Nick attempts to grab it back, but still, he’s too slow, still not tall enough.

“Ah ah,” the stranger tuts, “don’t worry. I was just sending your friends the creepy photo.” Nick starts to feel a little sick with anxiety, just wanting this to be over. He is never, ever listening to both his friends again. He’s frustrated and desperate, and in a fit of anger, he flounces off, “keep the fucking phone,” he rages, regretting it instantly, but he has no choice but to continue walking, leaving his very badly needed phone in the hands of another man. You idiot, you’re a public figure, what if he does something to your socials, he screams internally

“Hey!” Nick hears, “come back here.” He stops, and looks at the stranger with anxiety, his face hot from the embarrassment as he awkwardly walks back. Nick is confident that now his phone will be given back to him and he is secretly relieved, knowing he can’t afford to walk away and leave his public image in the hands of a stranger. He isn’t sure how he’d explain that to his brothers.

“You could make it up to me,” the boy suggests, and Nick looks at him properly, the smirk on his mouth and the way his eyes move, seemingly resting on Nick’s crotch.

“W – what?” Nick stammers, blushing, and the guy shrugs.

“You think I’m hot,” he states, “I think you’re hot, too.”

Nick chuckles nervously, unsure, a little scared this is some bizarre prank, but the boy is so sincere, nothing about him suggesting this is a joke. Nick has seen the look he has in his eyes in many boys and men, who Nick has flirted with and fucked before, but this is the first time Nick’s ever felt so drawn to another.

“I live near here,” the boy gestures, “I can think of a few things you can do for me to make up for your lack of manners.”

Nick wants to tell him to fuck off, wipe the slightly arrogant smirk off his face, but the confident way the guy stands, waiting on Nick’s response, his certainty, is making Nick’s dick twitch in interest, in want.

“Whatever,” the man smiles, casually slipping the phone back into Nick’s pocket before shrugging again, sauntering off, leaving Nick stood in the middle of the parking lot, torn between walking away – and he knows, he knows, kicking himself for it – or running after this guy desperately, letting him know how badly he wants him to make good on his promises.

He’s about to disappear when Nick makes a snap decision and runs after him, panting as he catches up, the boy turning to look at him from his car as he hears footsteps, bursting out in a laughter, his grin taking up his entire face. Nick readjusts his sweater.

“I’m horny, don’t – don’t get cocky,” he mutters, but the other boy doesn’t say a word, just makes Nick feel dizzy with a long look as he opens the passenger seat of his car and motion for Nick to get inside.

“Nick, right?” he asks, as he hops in and shut the door of the drivers seat, and Nick nods, assuming he saw his name on the messages, “I’m Ethan.”

Nick was going to respond but his eyes catches the way Ethan’s seatbelt tightens on his pecs and Nick almost drooled. His eyes traveled upward to see this adonis-like man smirking and Nick swiftly turned his head towards the road. The drive to the apartment was short and thankfully not awkward due to the music playing, but Nick was still sweating even with the air conditioner on because oh my god he’s so fucking hot, is that his huge dick print on his sweatpants? Fuck, his veins are so visible why are his fingers so LONG? that shit can reach my tonsi-

His thoughts were interrupted by the car finally parked at the other man’s house. Both of them walked towards the door with haste and no words exchanged, eyes focused on going inside.

Ethan unlocked the door and let Nick in, the latter unable to get a word out before Ethan’s mouth flew towards his, and he’s harsh and fast and demanding, so Nick matches it, kissing Ethan like he needs it, and maybe he does. Ethan is shoving him into what Nick assumes is his bedroom, pulling off Nick’s sweater, as Nick yanks that heavenly tight shirt, until they meet Ethan’s bed and Ethan throws him down on it. He watches, heart racing, as Ethan pulls down his jeans, pulling at them forcefully, yanking them off as Nick helps him, pulling him back down for a kiss. Nick’s never known someone kiss this way; unyielding and demanding as he grabs Nick’s head and devours him, Nick pulling back at Ethan’s tangled hair, until Ethan grabs him wrists and pins them down.

Nick can’t help but moan, his dick hard in his briefs, because Ethan is pressing all his buttons right now. He hates the self-satisfied grin on Ethan’s smug, pretty face, but there’s no denying Nick loves it rough, which Ethan clearly does too.

“Like that, sweetheart?” Ethan asks, tongue running over his bottom lip, Nick watching it’s every moment, groaning in response, Ethan’s large hands still wrapped around delicate wrists, still pinning Nick down. Nick is fully hard and needy now, Ethan letting go of his wrists to grip each side of his face and bruise him with a kiss, Nick making the most of his new found freedom by gripping Ethan’s shoulders, nails digging in.

He’s a mess already, the curly haired man moving harsh kisses to his neck and chest as he moves down, the kisses becoming wetter, sloppier, Nick whimpering as Ethan ghosts over his clothed dick, mouthing at him teasingly.

“Please,” Nick whispers, but Ethan either doesn’t hear or ignores it, pressing feather light kisses across him, Nick beginning to peel his briefs off only to have his hands batted away.

“Do that again and I’ll tie you up,” Ethan warns, and Nick’s cock jumps at the tone in his voice, obeying, hands grabbing fistfuls of Ethan’s duvet instead to stop them from straying. Ethan stops, pushing Nick encouraging so his head is propped up, and he has little choice except to look at Ethan as he mercifully begins to strip him off his briefs. Nick’s toes curl as they’re discarded and Ethan is back between his legs, Nick waiting for the inevitable lick, looking down at Ethan as he’s forced to wait.

“What?” he asks, knowing his face is pink and he’s far gone, Ethan looking at him with playful eyes as he spreads Nick’s legs even further apart, leaning down, finally, Nick thinks, to touch his dick, but Ethan presses wet kisses and soft bites to the inside of Nick’s right thigh, moving up as he gets closer to Nick’s dick, nudging his balls with his nose and Nick is going to pass out from the feel of Ethan’s skin right there, from feeling his tongue and his little huffs of breath, whimpering embarrassingly loud as Ethan finally licks a long stripe up his dick to the tip, suckling the pre-cum collected there before he stops.

“Ethan,” Nick begs, and Ethan does the same to his left, Nick sure he’s intent on leaving bite marks on his fleshy thighs where there’s plenty for Ethan to sink his teeth into, Nick wondering if it’s possible to come from this. He’s obeying Ethan’s no touching rule, for now, and it is torture, before Ethan repeats this special form of hell – licking from Nick’s balls up to the tip of his cock, in one long, slow lick – flicking his tongue over the head, and pulling away. “This – I can’t do this,” Nick moans, “please just, give me…”

Ethan shakes his head, and Nick falls quiet, until he feels the blessed tight heat of Ethan’s mouth around his cock, Ethan sucking his dick perfectly, swirling his tongue around the head as he comes up, Nick crying out, trying his best to hold off, to wait.

“Ethan, I’m – I - ” he whines, Ethan stopping, quick and elegant as he leans up and kisses Nick’s mouth, “what’s wrong, baby?”

“Let me,” Nick gasps, trying to push Ethan down, “I want to do it to you.”

He does, too, because Ethan’s sweatpants are still on and he needs them off, wants to see Ethan’s dick and taste it in his mouth. Nick loves sucking cock, loves the feel of it in his mouth and the taste of come, and he’s good at it, wants to make Ethan whimper in the way Ethan’s made him shake.

“Yeah? You like sucking dick?” Ethan asks, unyielding, sadly, still looming over Nick and Nick gives up on trying to change their positions, not exactly hating this one, Ethan grabbing his bitten thighs as he attacks Nick’s mouth and neck with his soft lips.

“Yeah,” Nick grins, “of course.”

“Why should I let you suck me off?” Ethan asks, letting Nick’s thighs drop as he keeps Nick pinned down, kissing parts of Nick’s face that Nick doesn’t think anyone has ever kissed, always coming back to his mouth, his neck, moving to his collarbone, shoulder, biting. Nick is going to look like he’s been in a fight. Matt and Chris will have a field day when he finally turns up at home.

“Um, because – I’m great?” Nick asks, frowning, wondering what kind of weirdo turns down a blowjob, and Ethan stops so he can look at Nick, Nick continuing to be bowled over by the way Ethan’s eyes seem to burn into his skin.

“What makes you so great, pretty boy?” Ethan rasps, and Nick brings his nails down Ethan’s back.

“I look good with a cock in my mouth,” Nick teases, “and, after all, you did say I need to make it up to you.”

“You need to, don’t you?” Ethan grins, then moving so that he straddles Nick’s waist, Nick helping him pull down his sweats, Ethan standing briefly to get the fabric off his feet and boxers off before he’s shuffling up, Nick still propped up nicely by the large pillows. Nick attempts to not given Ethan the satisfaction of his astonishment at how large Ethan’s dick is, but he fails.

“Still feeling confident, baby?” Ethan asks, hand wrapping around his cock as he plays with himself, jerking off, and Nick can’t help but lick his lips in anticipation, nodding, while he’s nervous he’s excited, knowing Ethan’s dick is going to fill him up properly, that he’ll feel the thick head knock at the back of his throat and makes his eyes water. He’s hungry for it. Ethan moves closer, knees over Nick’s shoulder as his big hand plants against the wall and his other hand hangs onto his headboard. Nick opens his mouth, ready for it, desperate for it, but he’s patient, waiting for Ethan’s say so, and Ethan makes slow, deliberate movements, wiping the leaking tip of his cock on Nick’s mouth and his cupid’s bow.

“Good boy for waiting,” Ethan praises, and Nick’s dick jumps, “you can suck it now, baby.”

Nick takes as much as he can, which is over half, but not all of it, and sucks in a hollow motion, moving back up before he forces himself to take every inch, down to Ethan’s balls, and pulls back, spluttering.

“Hey,” Ethan says, taking Nick by the chin, “take it easy, baby, don’t choke.”

“M’sorry,” Nick whispers, embarrassed, wanting to be good, to hear Ethan’s praises once more, and he’s easier with it this time, taking Ethan into his mouth and sucking him properly, rather than racing to get the entire dick inside him, and he can enjoy this, sucking Ethan at a nice, fast pace, but not too fast, getting off to the weight of Ethan’s dick and the smell of him, Ethan silent but present, running his thumbs over Nick’s cheekbones as Nick sucks his dick, happy and contented.

He mewls in protest when Ethan grabs his hair and pulls him off, trying to follow Ethan’s dick, not ready to stop, but Ethan isn’t interested, easily flipping Nick over so he’s face down on the bed. Nick waits as the pillows are wrenched from him, Ethan lifting him like a ragdoll as he puts them under Nick’s hips, Nick’s ass higher than before. Nick’s feels like he’s on fire, his skin aflame, pale but also pink with the heat, and he braces himself for Ethan’s fingers, surprised when Ethan covers him with his own body, kissing his neck.

“You’re so hot,” Ethan growls, mouth on Nick’s jaw, and Nick is sure Ethan is trying to actually eat him, “as soon as I saw you get on that aisle, the first thing I thought was, I want to fuck that boy,” Ethan smiles, Nick moaning as Ethan continues licking him, “saw your ass and thought, I bet he loves riding dick.”

Nick all but whimpers, pushing back, needy, and Ethan shows compassion, bringing his hand past Nick’s waist to curve over Nick’s ass, gripping at his hip.

“Do you? Love riding cock?” Ethan pants.

“Yeah,” Nick says, pushing his ass back to feel Ethan’s dick against it, “want me to ride you?”

“Patience, baby,” Ethan demands, pulling Nick over to kiss him, Nick moving with Ethan, not expecting the disappointed moan when Ethan leaves him, moving down and spreading Nick’s legs further apart. Nick keeps his hands up, mouth open and wet on his left hand, gripping the duvet with his other hand, and he trembles as Ethan spreads his ass open, crying out as he feels Ethan’s thumb tease over his rim, pressing down and ever so slightly inwards, teasing, always.

“I’m not a virgin,” Nick says throatily, hoping Ethan will speed up at that, the way he’s playing with Nick’s ass slow and gentle but mind melting at the same time, and Ethan just laughs at that, slapping Nick’s ass playfully with his other hand.

“I didn’t think you were,” Ethan says, voice loud in the silence of the apartment, “I still wanna take my sweet time.”

Nick whines as Ethan continues to give him something but not everything, loud as Ethan slips and pushes a finger inside of him, Nick stretching his legs, his toes, in a heavenly trance as the man explores him. He feels Ethan move, and then hears the squirt of lube, feels another finger join the first, and he gasps as Ethan scissors them, pulling them to the rim, almost fully out, as his thumb makes the gentlest of scrapes on his perineum, to his balls. Nick moans out on his hand, practically drooling.

He panics as he feels Ethan’s fingers disappear, not wanting this to be over, throwing his head back as he searches for an answer.

“Turn back around, baby,” Ethan insists, not looking at Nick, transfixed on his ass. He immediately obliges, feeling his brain mush and fill with Ethan Ethan Ethan. He feels like it’s been hours but he knows that’s untrue, and he’s ready to beg for it, for Ethan to open him again and slide his big cock inside him, but he doesn’t have to say anything as Ethan spreads him before dipping down. Nick all but screams as Ethan’s tongue licks across the rim of his hole, wet and rough. Nick instinctively tries to move forward, but he can’t; he’s facedown and Ethan’s hands are alternate from his hips to his asscheeks, spreading them again, as he eats Nick out. The rough texture of Ethan’s tongue, the way he presses his big, puffy lips on Nick’s rim is almost enough to make Nick sob. He’s holding it together, just thrusting as much as he can with the pillows underneath him and when he moves his forehead, he notices how sweaty he is, the back of his hands shining.

He yelps as Ethan pushes his tongue inside his hole and brings his hand up to the base of Nick’s spine, pressing his thumb inside of Nick to keep him slightly open. Nick is lost, utterly ruined, shook by how this stranger knows his body better than he does, whining as Ethan keeps his face buried in his ass; not for one-minute hesitating or slowing down as he eats Nick out as passionately as he kisses his mouth.

“I’m – Ethan - ,” he begs, knowing he’s a few well timed thrusts from Ethan’s tongue and fingers away from coming on the pillows beneath him, Ethan pulling his fingers out with a clear, wet pop, removing his tongue too, not before he sinks his teeth into one of Nick’s asscheeks. Nick is wrecked, his body tingling, his thighs burning from Ethan’s sharp teeth, a wetness between his legs like he’s never felt and an ache in his balls that is begging for release.

“You’re perfect,” Ethan assures him, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, Nick looking at him longingly over his shoulder, “what do you want, baby?”

“You,” Nick moans, pushing himself back, wanting Ethan’s cock in him, “please, Ethan.”

“Mmm,” Ethan muses, and Nick is pleased to see he’s also hot, pink, sweat linging on his forehead from exertion, Nick yelping as Ethan brings his hand down on Nick’s ass, playful but enough to tan it, “turn around.”

Nick does, fairly weak now and desperate, beyond desperate, for his orgasm to tear through him and leave him blind and gasping. Ethan throws away the pillows carelessly, grabbing Nick’s hips and bringing him down, as he lubes up his dick and presses the head against Nick’s hole. Nick nods, and Ethan begins to push, Nick inhaling, mouth open, as he feels the familiar burn of a nice, thick cock pressing inside of him. Ethan is slow but intense, forcing Nick’s thighs up as he makes his way in, Nick groaning, a little high pitched towards the end when he feels Ethan is fully in. He lets one of Nick’s legs drop, apparently unable to leave Nick’s face or hair alone, before he begins to fuck Nick, gently at first.

“You naughty boy,” Ethan whispers, “is this what you wanted, huh?”

“Yeah,” Nick begs, voice broken, “god, please, give it to me.”

Ethan doesn’t waste time. Nick lets go of any dignity he was hoping to keep, moaning and whimpering with every single thrust Ethan makes. Ethan takes Nick like Nick belongs to him, like this is his right, to spread Nick wide and to fuck him, hips snapping into hips as Ethan clings to him tightly, Nick feeling Ethan’s dick so deep inside him, touching places he’s never felt anyone touch, his vision clouding over.

“Ethan,” Nick sobs, overwhelmed, Ethan slowing down, holding Nick open by his thighs as he pulls his cock out, Nick horrified.

“Ethan! Please! No! I’m sorry, I’m fine, I’m ok, please give it to me,” Nick begs, now losing his self-respect along with his long-gone dignity, feeling on the edge of tears. Ethan can’t leave him like this, can’t bring him to the brink of such pleasure to stop, it’s too cruel, Ethan once again flipping him over so now Nick is on his stomach. He cries out as Ethan slides straight back in, pulling Nick so Nick is on his knees, his upper body stretched out, Ethan’s big hands on both hips, slamming into him, the wet sound of slapping skin obscene alongside Nick’s enthusiastic cries and Ethan’s panting.

Nick is dripping with sweat, sliding off his own arms every time he tries to rest his head, yelping as Ethan yanks him up by his hair.

“Yeah? This what you need, Nick?” he asks, grunting, and Nick moans his agreement, unable to do much else. The forced stretch of his neck is delicious, Ethan not letting his pace drop for a moment, setting a punishing and perfect speed, Nick’s leaking cock a mess as he feels his balls tighten, knowing he’s finally, finally going to lose control and feel that blissful high.

“Want you to come like this,” Ethan says, slapping his ass again, “want you to come from getting fucked.” Nick can’t say anything, can’t even nod, because Ethan’s still pulling his hair as he slams in, quickening his almost reckless pace, Nick only concentrating on that one thing, that one feeling. Ethan is hitting his spot, perfect and fast and desperate and with one last yank of Nick’s hair, he is coming, begging and groaning, babbling a mixture of Ethan and God, blacking out as he does.

He’s beyond over-stimulated, debauched and destroyed as Ethan follows him, letting go of Nick’s hair to cling onto his hips and fuck him with a few last, sprinting thrusts, Nick gasping as he feels Ethan fill him with come, warm and thick, Ethan crying out loudly as well, collapsing on top of Nick.

“Fuck,” Ethan groans into Nick’s hair, “holy fuck.”

“Yeah,” Nick agrees, still too weak to open his eyes or speak.

Ethan kisses the back of his neck before he pulls out his dick, Nick cringing as he hears the wet sounds, feeling Ethan fall out of him, and he’s mildly disgusted when Ethan rocks back onto his knees, opening Nick’s ass again, looking down at his wet, come filled ass.

“Ethan,” Nick accuses, feeling his face heat up Ethan further, Ethan just smirking, proud of the mess he’s created, Nick sore and sensitive as Ethan plays with him a little, whimpering as he feels some come drip out. Ethan laughs at Nick's embarrassment, leaning over and scrambling around some bedside drawers. Nick gasps as he feels coolness on his ass, Ethan clearly wiping him clean.

Ethan flips back down next to Nick, Nick still curled into the pillow, not shy but very aware of his sweaty, exhausted, fucked-out look. Ethan runs his fingers through red hair, not tugging this time, and he leans in, kissing Nick in a way that betrays his previous rough and ready treatment. Nick responds softly, kissing back.

“You ruined me,” Nick gasps, still numb, and Ethan stifles a giggle, “you ruined me,” he retorts. They lie like this for a few precious minutes, Ethan still excited as he sits up, ruffling his hair before he fishes around for something, Nick half watching out of the corner of his eye when he sees Ethan hold out Nick’s phone like he’s won a prize.

“Unlock it,” Ethan says, handing it to Nick, who does it without question. Ethan scrolls, finding the groupchat

The chat after Ethan sent a photo of himself went into a frenzy, a long conversation between his two friends going about how hot he is.

Ethan giggles at it, and Nick thinks he’s quite beautiful, pretty brown eyes and that sinful mouth and a tongue that Nick wants to feel a thousand times more.

Nick frowns as Ethan types, lazily trying to grab it back but missing entirely.

“What are you typing? Ethan?”

“I’m saying… ‘he’s just been balls deep inside me’,” Ethan cackles, and Nick shoots up at that, grabbing his phone, seeing the exact words sent by ‘Nick’ in the chat.

“Fuck!” he says, “Ethan!”

He settles back down, cringing as he sees the messages from Ethan's first text fly in, making Ethan laugh loudly and Nick cringe but smile all the same.

jacob elordi brainrot

Tara: HOLY FUCKKKK

Larray: u little SLUT

Larray: how big is he?

Tara: NICK FINALLY GOT DICK GUYS IM SO PROUD OF HIMM 😭😭😭

Larray: ANSWER ME RN

Ethan snatches it back, taking Nick by surprised then takes a snap of them, Nick hiding half his face under the duvet, Ethan looking far too pleased with himself.

“You look so cute,” Ethan says, and Nick’s stomach summersaults again, watching Ethan send the picture, waiting for the instant replies.

His phone pinged constantly after the photo was sent, Nick can imagine what kinds of debauchery his two friends are yapping about the situation.

“Your friends are funny,” Ethan laughs, putting the phone aside, and Nick is over his initial embarrassment, especially as Ethan cuddles into him, letting Nick rest in the crook of his neck. He feels Ethan’s arm around him and kisses into his hair so he sneaks an arm around the other, hugging his waist close, enjoying the feel of a smile against his forehead.

“They got me laid, so, yeah, they’re ok,” Nick says into Ethan’s chest, Ethan playing with his hair as he mutters, “they got you completely fucked – ruined – I think you said.”

“Shit, let it go,” Nick teases.

“You’ve had better, baby?” Ethan checks, and Nick wants to lie, to tease, to flirt, but he has no energy and it’s preposterous to think he's had better than this. The sex was magnificent, electric, and Nick is still buzzing from it, wondering if he’ll ever come down from it.

“No,” he says shyly, honestly, “you?”

“No, shit. I thought so, but you were something else,” Ethan praises, and Nick preens under his compliments and praise, flushing from pride rather than embarrassment this time around.

“You’re gonna stay, yeah?” Ethan asks, and Nick assumed he was. It feels natural, being here, like this, with Ethan. Nick nods into Ethan’s chest, and Ethan hugs him tighter, promising they’ll chill and order food later, Nick can stay and they’ll watch films.

“Maybe you can make good on your word later,” Ethan growls, “and ride me, bounce on my dick, huh?”

“I can’t even think about any physical activity right now,” Nick sighs dramatically, Ethan tickling his ear. Nick has his eyes closed but he can feel Ethan’s huge, beautiful smile, the visual of it imprinted in his brain. He’s already thinking about it though, climbing on top of Ethan and sitting back on his dick, rolling his hips.

“Okay, sweetheart,” Ethan said, and Nick snuggles into him, making a mental note to thank his friends when he next sees them. He’s sore but satisfied. All he needs is a nap, some food, and then he thinks he’ll enjoy showing Ethan exactly how good he is.

#nick sturniolo #nick sturniolo fanfic #nick sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo imagine #nick sturniolo fanfiction #nick sturniolo x oc #nick sturniolo x male reader

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thegetoufather · 6 months

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i am always here to talk about that man 🧍🏽‍♀️

ugh lem hes so dork boyfie coded i cant w him fwbs w benefits to lovers w him is eating my fricken brain!! the delicious miscommunications!!! I read this lovely little piece the other day and i cant get it out of my head so here is a gnawing thought i have inspired by that fic UGH.

warnings/premise: fwbs to lovers post sex fluff, uni au (kuroo in his 20s) cockwarming, dork kuroo, anti sex god propaganda, 18+ — the usual aman special

Your heart still hammers in your chest as you sit in the shattered remains of your arrangement with Kuroo. Yet nothing bleeds, the only thing you’re met with is the warmth of his kisses across every inch of skin he can find. The uncertainty you thought you would feel fades away, the gentle caresses of his touch causing you to melt against his chest.

Your head lifts up as he trails his fingers up your spine, a chaste kiss pressed against your forehead before he meets your eyes. He always look beautiful in the afterglow, with raven hair more mussed than usual and a flush painting his cheekbones. His eyes are always what you liked most, golden irises lit with a flame that would pool in your belly when he shows up at your door, that flame simmering to a comforting hearth when he massages your thighs after.

Except now, the look is different. Its adoration that doesn’t have to be tempered, a small smile playing on his lips when he sees you mirror the same look.

“So,” you begin.

“So.”

“This isn’t just casual anymore, is it?”

“That’s a wild thing to ask while I’m still inside you.”

“Kuroo!” You yelp, smacking him playfully on the chest. He responds in turn with one of his rooster cackles, the feel of the reverberation of his laugh in his chest making you smile even more.

“I thought we agreed you aren’t calling me that anymore.”

“Fine then, Tetsu.”

“Oh so I get a nickname now? You’re sooooo in love with me.”

“Shut up.”

A pause begins to enter in the space between you, the awkward question lingering in the air.

“So, um, how long have you, i mean, what made you want this to, y’know, be more?” You feel your heart pick up again after the question leaves your lips.

“Pretty soon after we started. I was never seeing anyone else but you.”

“What?!”

Kuroo’s eyebrows furrow at the disbelief in your voice. “Is that so hard to believe?”

You blink back him, slowly realizing he has no idea the impact he’s left on the girls on campus. All those whispers in the stands of his games, all the girls elbowing their way to talk to him at a party. All of that, meaningless to him.

“I mean, I just kept hearing people say things about you and I assumed —”

“That because everyone thinks I’m hot and sexy I’m sleeping with them?”

“Now that I’m talking with you, I’m realizing the reason you maintain that reputation is because more people haven’t seen this side of you.”

“Which is what?”

“A massive dork.”

“Correction, massively hot and sexy dork.”

You snort, rolling your eyes at his shit eating grin. “Why did you wait this long then?”

He puts a finger under your chin to tilt you towards him so you can meet his gaze. “I dunno, I guess I was scared too. I liked having you around so much and I thought if all you really wanted was sex, I could live with that. I wanted you in any capacity rather than none.”

The confession makes you warm, making your heart pick up again. But beneath your palms, his beat is steady, thrumming with the conviction in his words. You can feel your eyes start to swell, but instead you laugh, giggling at how stupid you’ve been to not see this sooner.

“So I guess we are both idiots, huh?”

“I guess we have been.” There’s a crooked smile on his face when he replies, followed by a calloused thumb coming up to wipe the tears that have rolled off your cheeks.

Kuroo clears his throat and sticks his hand out in between your bodies, as though he was initiating a handshake.

“Let’s start over. Hi, I’m Kuroo Testuro, buisness major, chem minor. Want to go out some time?”

#this is so bad but im rusty i needed this idea out #he is dancing in my brain rent free #dusting out his old apartment #missed u testu #hq fluff #kuroo x reader

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pooplyface1423 · 3 months

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Tsudere /sub Jax that pretends to hate the reader but does things to secretly be with them x a fem happy but smart Uzadere that loves being in the circus.She loves adventures,animals,cute things,fighting,food ect! lots of energy too but can be pretty insensitive and a little selfish with a little crush on jax. I feel like at first jax would completely reject liking her then he would be extra mean,then Maybe subconsciously know he likes her amd hates the feeling lol. cus he copes by trying to not have feelings and tries to act "tough". its pretty obvious that the reader is in love with him but his dumb ass cant catch on . She gives lots of compliments which makes him flustered and mad ( he is mad bc he thinks nobody likes him that much, he is mean to her to make her go away but it doesn't work ) but he pretends not to care. the reader would definitely confesses first tho. Sorry for such a long request its just that not many people write jax in this sorta way so i had to be detailed lol. also if you don't wanna use female pronouns you can make it non gender ofc 😅tysm for even reading such a long thing! and you don't have to do this at all lr you can switch it up. Anything is VERY appreciated tho😊

DUDE this question was long but its a very good one so lemme write it.:]

Warning: Kissing (just like one but still) CRINGEEE and that it.

also Y/N is female just so ya'll know but not a lot is said about her gender here so could be non binary.

Lil backstory : When You first got here it was around 7 months before pomni gets into the circus. your reactions to seeing all the supposed people was terrifying u were laughing your brains of since u thought it was all just a big prank but once u realized it was real u were just stunned. I mean u were still amazed like wow i'm in a virtual reality type of reaction. And about what u look like idk that up to yourself but lets say Ur like a type of animal could be a cat or something else. U were always ecstatic to be in the circus and everybody even Caine were surprised. Like it not everyday in this virtual reality u see a person who is more than happy to be there. (also i'm not really gonna add Kaufmo since their is little to no info bout him)

Okay now to the good stuff

So really your weren't stupid to not notice how Jax would occasionally "look ur way to see something else" nor to notice how differently he treated u compared to the others. Either he would go out of his way to be nice or mean to you.

You were chatting bout random nonsense with zooble when she said

"Hey Y/n do you see how much of a dumb### Jax's looks like just looking at you"Looking at you then at Jax then at you.

"no lemme check"You turned around to see jax looking away from you to above you? yea he was doing the "look ur way to see something else" crap again.

"ugh it starting to annoy me" Says Zooble wanting to stand up and start to beat the crap out of Jax but thankfully u stopped her then said

"hey its okay he may be weird and all but we got to be used to this anyway where stuck here"

"but he does like you Y/n we can all see it in his eyes" Says Ragatha entering the conversation

"yea ragatha is right how bout we make a plan to you know um- make him confess he like you" says zooble looking at you waiting for an answer.

Then u spoke up

"Sure i guess but knowing him he would never confess"

"Ugh lets head to my room to discuss the plan" says ragatha getting up

You three walk all he way to the room corridors and enter Ragatha's Room and discus how you would get Jax to confess his feelings to you.

"Okay so how should we do this" says Ragatha with some confusion in her face

"Well we know that Jax is a very Um- how should I say this es stupid and lets just say hes like a little puppy who follows you around" Says zooble before you with shook face say

"WAIT what is that supposed to mean I never see him trailing behind me"

"He does he always trails behind you buts ur either dumb or blind since u never see him literary behind u. ALL THE TIME" Says Zooble

"Well um- we should get started with the plan and stop taking bout how Jax is a little twerp" Says Ragatha with a bit of an annoyed face splatted in her face

"Okay okay well first of all since we know Jax is like a little dog with nothing else to do than follow Y/n we should..........."Says Zooble spilling out what the plan would be about.

Well basically the plan is make Jax follow u around Y/n complements Jax every time he does something for her even the smallest of things like letting u have the first of anything picking up flowers for u,him pranking u and much more.

Everything was going according to the plan Jax being Jax follows you around and sneaks up on you with a centepied (which ur scared of) and lands it right besides u trying to get a scared yelp from u but instead u just threw it away and said

"Jax u little bad bunny don't do that again" while pinching his cheek just slightly

"~wait you aren't mad?" Says Jax while becoming a blushing mess

"no of course not bunny boy come on lets go outside"

you two go outside and jax keeps trying to make your way there horrible by trying to trip ur feet over and over again but failing miserably.

Once you both are by the lake you start to look around and see Zooble and Ragatha watching impatiently.

"So what are we doing here again?" says Jax

"nothing much just .. Taking in some fresh air i guess"

"Y/n there is no fresh air here u know that right?" says Jax with a serious face

"Oh um i meant like ..... space apart of everyone"

"ok i guess then what should we do?" says Jax with a sly smile appearing in his face

"how about we go on the tea cups?"

"whatever you want toots" says Jax

Both spend 2 hours trying all the rides over and over, Jax never saying crap

As the day ends in the digital realm first comes the digital dinner the classic chicken and veggies.

After that, Caine suggested that you all play a quick game, and with no other option, everybody agrees.

HIDE & SEEK

"yay i guess" says zooble clearly annoyed they have to do this activity even tho it is fun she wants her alone

After the game which took around 30 min like damn these dudes have great hiding spots ,Caine gave everybody the green light to finally have there alone time/sleep

"UGH finally" Zooble before walking up to you

"Hey Y/n did Jax say anything to you?" Says Zooble quickly before she forgets about it

"No ... what should we do?"

"Hey idk bout you but i would of totally just make the first move at this point"Says Ragatha walking up to you both of you

"Well she has a point" "bout what?" "bout how you should def make the first move now since his dumb##s won't do S#it"

"okay I'll try but do i have to do it in front of u all or do i wait for everybody to leave?"

"Um okay new plan......." Says zooble making the new plan

Basically make gangle distract Jax long enough for everybody to leave to there rooms then gangle runs away, Then y/n will sneak up on Jax and spill the beans herself.

Everything went accordingly as planed gangle ran away just as she noticed everybody gone. Then Jax shrugs it of and slowly walks up to his room until...

"Hey Jax" "what do you want?" "not much just wanna talk to you...bout something"

"bout what dollfac-"

He says before being interrupted by a kiss

"does that answer ur question?"

"UM what was that?"... bb-but i guess it does"

"that's great! its official were dating"

"Wait WHAT!?" says Jax surprised as hell

"Goodnight Jax!" Says y/n as she gives one last kiss on his cheek

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Hello finally finished hope u enjoyed.:]

@fuckyalllkl

#my post #tadc jax #jax x reader #the amazing digital circus jax #x reader

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a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire · 2 months

Text

Some of you have probably noticed that I havent made a liveblog post in a while. Well, thats because I usually read on the bus and during my classes and then I come home and summarize my thoughts on the 2-5 chapters I read after theyve marinated in my head for a little while, but unfortunately i appear to be incapacited at the moment so I cant do that. But because its been weeks and I dont wanna forget anything and I would very much like to finish this series soon, I'll try to read at home sometimes from now on. Since my brain is still a lil mush Im gonna do what I did for my last post, which is write down what Im thinking as Im reading instead of summarizing all my thoughts retroactively, except this time I have my german copy on hand so if I want to quote something it'll be a translation

Anyway, with all that said, welcome to my twisted mind, please enjoy my thoughts on A Court of Mist and Fury Chapters 40

Chapter 40

Ive been wanting to say this for a while now but i kept forgetting, but they translated 'winnowing' as 'den Wind spalten' ['splitting the wind'] and that is objectively so much cooler, shoutout to my gal Alexandra Ernst for that

Feyre being like "ugh, its so pathetic how these human guards think they could stand a chance against even one of us" hurts me so much you guys what have they done to my girl

Once again, its apparently perfectly fine if Rhysand doesnt tell Feyre anything "because she never asked" but if Tamlin doesnt tell her anything when she never asked hes the devil

Also once again, Feyre is perfectly not-triggered at Mor wearing a scarlet dress

Idk how to explain this, but Rhysand saying that Feyre is wearing a golden crown because "she looks so good with it, how could he not give her one" is somehow the perfect encapsulation of the hollowness of her High Lady title

Oh, of course three of the queens only showed up to watch the other two talk, itd be too hard to write dialogue if they actually participated in this important conversation

hello???? Feyre referring to humans as "your kind" ??? wth is going on

"every side bears some blame" hey rhysand ive got a question for ya. which side enslaved the other again

everytime the oldest queen does anything the prose feels the need to remind me of how old and wrinkly she is and its like, i get it, shes OLD

The oldest queen is spitting so hard rn, Im not even gonna question how they heard of the night court when Feyre, who lived closest to Prythian for many years, didnt know anything aout the individual courts prior to getting there herself, Im just gonna put her whole little monologue here: "Oh? [...] The High Lord of the Night Court asks that we join him so that we can save lives together? Fight for peace? And what about the lives that you have taken during your long, despicable existance? What about the High Lord who shrouds himself in darkness and destroys the mind of those who stand in his way? [...] We have heard of you on the continent, Rhysand. We have heard of what the Court of Night is capable of, what you do to your enemies. Peace? I wouldn't have thought that you - a man who enslaves the minds of others and kills them out of pure enjoyment - even know that word."

Anyway, she was spitting absolute bars and Feyre gets super mad about it and almost commits arson but manages to reign herself in and its like girlie, why are you so upset? one of the first things we find out about the night court in this book is that they apparently indiscriminately kill (or atleast torture) anyone who crosses the night court border without permission like theyre the fucking us government, i think the bad reputation is justified

Forgive me if I sound callous, but I have absolutely no sympathy for Rhysand flinching at the mention of Amarantha when Feyre didnt even use her name and is also talking about how she fucking DIED AT HER HANDS

God, I feel like I have something to say about every single line this post is gonna be like 10 thousand words long by the time Im done

So lets take it from the top; Feyre tries to convince the mortal queens to give them the half of the book by recounting to them how much everyone suffered under Amarantha and how she was gruesomely beaten to death and then revived, which is not a compelling argument to me, who actually witnessed all of that, much less these queens who have barely any context for anything shes saying right now

The oldest queen is like "you dont know anything about anything" which is true what the fuck does Feyre know about whats going on in the human world or even the fae world at large, and then Rhysand growls "dont you dare talk down to her!!" because shes passionate and speaking from the heart or whatever and its like, okay, shes still not good at politicking or even just basic negatioation and shes talking to a seasoned politician who old as fuck

Like, if Feyre was actually smart, she wouldve long since realized that she couldnt convince these queens to protect this little slip of land right up to prythians border and been like "okay, you dont wanna protect the land, but can you atleast organize an evacuation so you can atleast save the people" Sure, they definitely still wouldnt have agreed to that because its a sjm book and theyre written to be comically evil, but it would atleast demonstrate Feyre being a little savvy, because right now all we're getting is her being stupid and stubborn in a situation where she really cant afford that

god, im just now noticing how pissed off I am, its been bleeding into my commentary and its not gonna stop, Im sorry. wait no, if youre reading this youre probably looking for negativity, so youre welcome, actually

Anyway, Rhys also says that Feyre is a kindhearted soul looking out for people who cant defend themselves even though she definitely thought that those human guards were pathetic for wanting to defend themselves when she and the other fae were soooooo much more powerful and he definitely knows that because the mental bond is fully open during this meeting and he chastises the queens for being selfish and cowardly when its like, my brother in christ you are doing the exact same bullshit, but atleast the queens are defending a wholeass continent while hes defending one (1) city. and iirc that city ends up getting attacked and destroyed anyway so good job my guy

Theres something so oddly biblical about the story Mor is telling about Miriam, down to her name being Miriam

That island thats removed from time is such bullshit istg

Is it just me or have these bozos not actually explained what they even need the other half of the book for. theyre just like "we need to stop this war and we'd like peace between humans and fae" and its like cool, hows the book gonna help with that though

im sorry, feyre wants to punch that old woman in the face????

the chapter ends with Elain being like "I hope they burn in hell" and i get that, they just straight up said that they want to abandon a whole bunch of people (them included) to die if a war breaks out, but you cant say that the night court girlies are not also at fault for being so fucking bad at politics

#anti acotar #anti acomaf #anti rhysand #anti feyre #flames and darkness liveblog

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laffy-taffy-creations · 6 months

Text

WOOOOOOOO WHUMPTOBER DAY 8 BABES

This fic was cross-posted on AO3 here

Collateral Damage

Overcrowded ER | Outnumbered | "It's all for nothing"

Fandom: My Hero Academia

Words: 1,188

Taglist: @athenswrites @lili-loves-whump

Warnings: hospitalization, power overuse, past experimentation

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The shaking started first. It was the first sign that anything was wrong.

Next was shouting. The sounds of things, walls, doors, windows breaking. I made the mistake of going out into the hall to figure out what was wrong and almost immediately got decked had I not ducked.

Villains. So many villains.

There was reason UA prided itself on security, it set up it’s offense defensively and it’s defense offensively. But the defense had broken somehow.

Shit shit shit what are we meant to do? None of the kids from the lower levels are heroes! Are any of them safe? Are they okay?

[Focus Clo. We’re a hero. We handle this.]

I had already ended up engaged in combat with some of them, but there were just so many that I wouldn’t be able to take any of them out using only the power I showed off.

We’re outnumbered. We’re out of options. We just have to stand our ground until support arrives.

But support wasn’t arriving. I put maybe 3 out of commission, and 6 more showed up for me and the others in the hallway. If we go all out now, it’ll end up hurting people. I cant get them all to safety in time.

Someone hit me in the back.

[Fuck it. Void.]

My power stretched and I let it go as far as it deemed through out the school, causing damage like no other. I knew it would end up going out of control, I fought to stay conscious the same as my fight to contain the full power of my quirk from harming innocents.

I let it rage, let myself go for just a little bit, let them have my wrath. Let them see exactly why they should never come back ever again.

I let the anger and hatred fuel it, let what had happened to me cause chaos, let my quirk handle and give proper catharsis to at least a small sliver of my fury. My happiness, my protectiveness, my want for others to live a better life than I had barred it inside as much as it would be leashed.

And after that I was in a hospital.

“No, nononono stay down! You need rest!” the nurse said when he saw me get up. My confusion must have shown. “We barely managed to get you in but you’re the current most likely source of whatever wrecked UA. You need to rest,” he explained.

My just-waking-up mind was still confused but I wrote it off in the name of sleep.

The next thing I remembered was waking up again. I could think more clearly now. There was an IV in my arm. I was hooked up to a heartrate monitor. I was no longer wearing my suit, instead being put in a hospital gown.

“They’re awake!” I heard vaguely.

My dad was the first to enter along side Ochako and Izuku.

The same nurse as before said, “their condition isn’t critical so we’re allowing the one extra visitor, but if it is to change at any point you all will need to leave the room and they will only be permitted to have 2 visitors after that. “

My friends nodded and my dad immediately crouched down by my bed side.

“Are you okay sweetie? Is everything alright? Did you use too much power?” he whispered so only we would hear.

“Yes… to all three of those. Ugh, I feel like death.”

“Yeah well, you almost put us in death when we couldn’t find you. What happened?”

“Uhhh…” I wracked my brain for memory. “I went to the bathroom, the building started shaking, I heard sounds of general conflict and when I opened the door there were way too many villains for anybody to feasibly take in a fight storming their way through the building.”

There was a pause.

“You mean you dont remember anything about UA having a complete shift in reality for like 5 minutes before going back to normal?” Ocha asked.

“Yeah, even those of us on the training field experienced some of it,” Izuku added.

The nurse cut in, “they’re the most likely source for where all that power would have come from currently, so they probably dont remember anything about it. Plus, if it was someone near them, some part of said power might have knocked them out or caused them to forget.”

“Are you telling us they were the one that caused all that carnage?”

“Most likely, yes,” the nurse answered.

My dad looked at me and I nodded. “They are,” he said.

All eyes were on him now. “It’s been something of a secret since I adopted them, but yes, they have a very intense and powerful quirk that, under the right circumstances, would be able to have done that to UA.”

“I thought their quirk was Illusion?” Ochako questioned.

“One of, yes. I have multiple. Illusion is the one I was born with.”

“...Are you trying to say there’s ways to manifest multiple quirks?”

I sat up. “Well, considering I can do this,” I paused and concentrated, letting my heartrate monitor flatline for a bit, “for a minute straight without any sort of repercussions, I’d say that’s a fair assumption.”

“But why keep this secret?” Izu said confused.

“Because I didnt get these of my own volition. They were forced on me.” Dont think about it dont think about it dont think about it.

“By who?”

“That’s a question best left to the police,” my dad cut in.

“A pro-hero,” I responded.

The silence and tension could’ve been cut with a knife.

“A…A hero?”

“Yes. A very famous one. One that nobody would honestly believe me. He pumped me full of chemicals and now the official quirk blocker on file for me is a sedative.”

“A sedative?”

“You saw how strong my quirk is. Normal blockers dont cut it, I have to make special ones for me that are 10 times stronger than the current strongest ones available to heroes and cops, and even those still break when I lose control.”

The silence was only broken by the small shuffling of clothing as my dad offered me a cup of water.

“...We had a tough time finding you. There was a lot of people rushed to 3 different ERs to properly accommodate how many people ended up injured and otherwise passed out.”

“I can imagine.”

“...What exactly does your, uhhh… lab quirk?... do?”

“I was given three. You’ll have to be more specific.”

“Uhm… The one we saw you use?”

I put down the water. “That one’s my most powerful. It started as a general item-creation quirk, with the main component being a form of matter manipulation that with enough stamina turned into this.” I shifted the room around us, changing realities, shifting the environment, then letting it settle back to normal.

”So it’s matter manipulation?”

“At one point while it was still developing fully. Its true form is much better described as reality bending.”

Ocha spoke up, “That’s… terrifying.”

“Indeed.”

There wasn’t much else to be said.

The truth is finally out.

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bluupxels · 11 months

Text

hi simblr long time no see (a week) but im back! also hit a little follower milestone??? we’re at a little less than how many people were in my high school graduating class which is a little insane to think about but my brain cant really comprehend scale and numbers so its fine 😁 i dont really have anything to post im still just kinda getting my life together a bit bc i had a long ass week but ill be around here a little

sharing my paramore concert pics/experiences under the cut hehe ugh i had so much fun

boston calling was SO fun i’d never been before but it was like 90F/32C i was dying. got to see bleachers too but i didnt take any proper pictures, jack antonoff the man that you are....

we were pretty far back and i couldnt see the stage bc we weren’t about to be standing in the pit for 8 hours but i could see the screens so it was fine. someone next to us was like “this is why i love boston because everyone’s so short” and my 5′2 ass was just like damn...

okay onto madison square garden yEAHHHHHH. my phone camera quality is so bad i hate you apple.

i didnt get the exclusive msg shirt but its fine *twitches*. and YES hayley did have to stop the show bc people were getting rowdy and i recorded the whole thing. boston calling crowd was so much better tbh even the people next to me at msg were rude as fuck. i was sobbing at both shows i literally love paramore so much you guys you dont understand.... the last time i saw them was in 2014 for monumentour with fall out boy (minor flex) and before that was 2013 which was my very first concert and thats IT!! literally the only concerts ive ever been to have been paramore....

this was also the first time i’d ever been to nyc and i did it alone bc i dont think things through ever. i got there the afternoon of the show and then left the same time the next day so i didnt actually get to see much but i still had fun. and i knew new york was like on another level but i thought living in boston would have prepared me a little... it was truly something but i think my gay speedwalking, walk rage, and resting bitchface helped me blend in. when going out of your comfort zone pays off hmm much to think about

#a wild few days for me it still doesnt feel real #also that succession finale.........#i was listening to the soundtrack the entire train to new york and while walking around #i got 2 more succession related shirts im so excited for them to come in #buggirl200 is my savior #ew i have to go to work now okay bye #court rambles

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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year

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...

#shout out to that tiny glimmer of focus i had Saturday before i dumped ants on my brain #now im stuck in. i have to be productive but i csnt focus but i csnt do anything fun loop #half of my brain: what if u just relax? the othet half: no. shut up. what i just agonize until i explode?#annoying. and im apparently on call for jury duty the entire month of January #which means i have to be back from home by jan 2. and i probably have to stay until at leas dec 20th here #so optimistically i could have 12 full days and 2 travel days. but we'll see what happens #my mum is looking at flights for me bc im a barely functional person and i end up in hysterical tesrs everytime i have tk buy plane tickets #everytime they call i feel like im talking to them from the bottom of a well. like hi! hello! nice to see familiar faces!#tell me tales from the outside world! oh not much going on? thats ok we can still talk tho. talk and talk and talk #i talk to much. because im stuck in this well and im sad and i want someone to help me but also the ladder is right there and im choosing #not to stand up. so the conversation ends and i go back to laying half submerged and crumpled up in my well water #slowly unraveling into my stagent little puddle #and i cant stop thinking about all the time im blurring away #my mum asked if i was even coming home for Christmas #and im like. of course im coming home. i dont want to be here but its so hard to get my brain to justify leaving #i dunno. i just have to get these stupid manuscripts done. and applications submitted #so i can at least breathe a little. and then hopefully ill get accepted somewhere and i can throw myself into something more wonderful #so i can at least see the stars from the bottom of my sad little well #ugh. the amount of time i spend paralyzed by all the things i have to do is infuriating #just start something. make progress and eventually youll be done. stop whining abt it #ay ay ay. mayhaps i should just quit today and hope for a better tomorrow #but then im just pushing back everything a little further. ay. it never ends #unrelated #srry for being so mopey :-P like i said i talk too much

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hisunfinishedsymphony · 1 month

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i dont even know what to say . tws from tags below the cut . ignore this . / nf

pt : i dont even know what to say. tws from tags below the cut. ignore this. /nf

(there'll be no pt below i'm to exhausted, apologies)

i dont know what to say except i literally wanna die. this , me reaching out , was suppose to change shit man . i was suppose to come out the other side and laugh at myself for overthinking . to grow more trust in myself and my loved ones . to get over this stupid feeling in my stomach . i wanted this to be different so fucking badly . but of course i fucked it up . even if it was by complete accident and mostly just communicative , even if this silence lasts a day , even if it never comes up again , even if im overreacting , ugh . i dont care . im still so upset . im stil so enraged with myself and angry at myself and i just wanna bash my head into a wall . like why am i so fucking stupid . why am i so horrible at everything . i cant even be a girlfriend right anymore and now he probably like hates me forever or some crazy shit because i just suck that bad at doing anything ever . and i bet posting this comes off as me being an attention seeker too . add it to the list of reasons why i am the worst fucking person to ever walk the face of this earth . i dont even know what emotiosn im feeling . if they even have names or reasons . i just hate myself right now more than anybody on the face of this whole planet . truth is i kind of saw the reaction coming but i told myself it wouldn ' t happen and that i was being irrational . but i guess im always right . its not like theres a switch in my brain i can flip to make my affection go away . i dont wanna be alone . and i dont wanna be bad . and i never ever would hurt anybody on purpose . and yet here i am . fuck . im here and i wanna did like nobody ' s goddamn business and i cant stand myself for it . and ofc because tumblr is held up by two popcicle sticks , elmers glue and a singular baked bean i cant be a creep and look at his acc to satisfy the fears i get when i get a notification of his posting . i just find myself staring at our dms and wanting to light myself on fire . but i cant just say that . because im sick of scaring off the only people i have left . and you chat you probably think im crazy !! not in the " oh my wil teehee so crazy " way ive posted about . because when soembody acts crazy , everybody turns on them . forgets who their friends are . nobody likes a REALLY crazy person . a BAD cluster b . a DANGEROUS radqueer . sick and tired of sanitizing myself . im a bad fucking person . i am a bad person

that is just who i am .

just because im a bad person doesnt mean i wanna be a disobedient one though , yeah ?

whatever

bye chat and if you read this and dont hate me thanks or whatever .

oh and fyi this is all / exg and all that . please dont worry about me !! it ' s all gonna be fine im probs just overreacting lol !!! ok bye chat . sorry

#⤹ tw suicidal ideation !!#⤹ tw suicide mention !!#⤹ tw death mention !!#⤹ tw !!#⤹ / neg !!#⤹ vent !!#⤹ kitty yaps !!#tw #vent #tw vent #bpd vent #tw sui ideation #tw sui talk #tw sui implied #tw sui #tw death #tw death mention

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paleclementine · 4 months

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okay i might as well do the update now. I'll try to include as much as I'm able, but I'll probably miss some details.

thank fucking Christ the semester is over.

Holy shit, I hadn't had such a hard time in school since my sophomore year of highschool. The classes were the most boring ones I've ever taken. The professors were so boring and terrible. I hated going to class, but it was one of the few things that got me away from my roommates. I can't stand thinking about them now, So i might later. I started losing weight and cutting down calories significantly, and since I started on November 8th, I've lost 7-10 pounds, but I've hit a plateau and can no longer (as of now) lose weight just by eating less, so I'll need to exercise again. tbh, I think all the weight I lost actually came from those first two weeks where I was running and doing abs and actually burning calories. Outside, of course, because it wasn't balls-fucking cold and burning my nose. I'm proud of myself for losing that weight, but I still have a long, long way to go. I want to get down to 88 pounds (ugw). I don't plan on staying there- genuinely, I don't- it's just... I want to be able to say I did it. That not only was I capable of it, but I actually accomplished it. I've never been underweight in my entire fucking life, and for once, I'd like to not be the duff. it will take hard work and discipline, but I'm not afraid of hard work; I'll get everything I want.

The new york trip was really fun, but physically draining. Anthony was a good sport about it, although he did play bloons tower defense on his phone more than I would have liked. He was good around my family though, and supportive of me when I got disgusted of the streets and subways and crowds. Side note- I hate new yorkers. They're so rude. There's lots of little things that happened, but my favorite parts were ice skating at Rockerfeller, getting peanut noodles (twice!) with Anthony in Chinatown, and hearing all his spiderman facts, watching Wicked, and napping when possible. It was a long trip, but worthwhile.

Now I'm home, and it's comfortable. I got everything I wanted for Christmas and liked all of my stuff. Unlike other Christmas's, I know I'll use everything I got. Me and Hailey watched all the harry potter movies together, and now I'm in a harry potter phase again. It's so good! Liking it isn't cringe (as I once thought- ugh, I got too consumed with millennial hate).

Btw, I went to hang out with Emily thinking we were going to eat dinner together and just talk, and then guess who was there? SAM. The fucking bastard. I don't know what the fuck happened- how it played out- to make him join, or if Emily let him come in the first place. I. Fucking. HATE HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway.

I'm doing well, trying to just chill out completely. God knows I need it and will continue to need it. I deleted tiktok and I already feel myself settling back into my natural rhythm again. I really, really appreciate that.. the norm for myself is not being on tiktok. My body and brain naturally don't want that level of overstimulation, and the mere act of not being on it makes me more relaxed. I literally had the app for two months-- maybe more, honestly, but I cant remember. that's a long fucking time. Since I've deleted it, I've read over 200,000 words of fanfic on AO3, and in my opinion, that's a much better way to spend my time. Sighhh. I hate tiktok. I hate social media. I think I'd end up fine if I got a flip phone so long as I could still listen to music.

Anyway, back to reading fanfic :) overall, I'm happy here. I don't want to go back to the cold. But I'll do what I must- because I must do it.

#livejournal

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tokyogruel · 9 months

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🎥for the hyperfixation ask? :3

🎥 do you have any favorite scenes from your hyperfixation?

MAN THIS IS DIFFICULT,, can i be extra and do one scene per prisoner? im going to GFHJK

it used to be a different scene for haruka, but i started thinking too much about this chair

it has so much weight and focus in his video, i started writing a whole post about it i. (grips my head) i cant think about a chair for an hour straight

the scene where yuno smashes the "rose-tinted glasses"

also there is so much cat stuff in her video. theres no way shes not kazui's daughter. i stand by it

when i first watched this scene it was on a small phone screen, the mound in front of them looked so much like flesh for a moment it gave me shivers

this isnt my favorite scene i just wanted to point out theres a noose next to her ^^

this whole scene leading up to rei's death got me. its just a little wild to me how muu's perspective didnt obscure her crime in any way- we explicitly see her stab rei. for most of the other t1 videos, their murders were(/are) a bit of a guessing game

im still writing my shidou theory i cant stand this man and how much he's occupied my brain. do you know how many fuckin times ive watched triage? like. ????? DO YOU UNDERSTAND

anyway, i dont think he's in a relationship, at least not a committed one. this is shidou's room- it's large and dark and unfurnished. its empty. this is not a house that a wife and children live in- this is a bachelor pad. also this is maybe my fav scene at the moment cause its just eating at my brain. why do you fucking live like this

also me laughing if this is where he got his "wife" from in his memory:

anyway i love his songs, i love him. his videos are boring without the flower symbolism. L

i woke up at 3:30 am to watch this video premiere when i was working a job that i hated and my life was falling apart, this hit me like a truck and i dont think ill get over it<3333 ily mappi youre so interesting but holy shit. you turned my brain into mulch for a week after this. inconsolable

i almost put one of the gif previews for cat here, but i think id rather avoid spoilers atm. the gifs are driving me up a wall though !!!

but ugh this very last moment in half? i fucking love the whole song and video. it's touching, it's soft, the music is beautiful. yes king, put your mask back on. i love a theatre actor

this is here for an observation: all of the other characters hurting amane at this part have the cult symbol clearly displayed on their design (the overlapping clouds) but yuri does not! it's only on his donation box

man i know its a little lame to enjoy the very end of these videos the most but. this scene always fucks me up. dissociating to cope with the hell that her cult puts her through as a child

im not explaining myself here

kotoko eats my brain away i love her and her pack of wolves in her brain. i love you girl. im going to dissect you and your video before deep cover comes out. i promise you.

#THANK YOUUYUSYYY #NIKO MY GOOD FRIEND NIKO #creature speaks

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grapecaseschoices · 2 years

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more tl;dr about the exile mcs

Kendis is a bit easier to figure out than Andy -- at least more direct. In part because I have played them more recently. But also because she is a lot more external -- and thus more open taking in than he is. I believe it would be easier for Kendis to take in Esme and Sabir (and even Eme) as positive influences as opposed to Andy who would fixate on Marcelle, because she’s the one who found him, she’s the one who gave him a home first. (And they’d probably click more at being private people, though again, I guess I can only truly know through playing.)

It is hard to cut into the differences beyond that, at least verbally, because Andy and Kendis both prioritze similar things. They are both ambitious, selfish characters whose focal point are their loved ones and their home. Andy has been more inner --> outer; while Kendis has been more a collection of individuals. For example, while Andy is less likely to broaden his circle in a personal sense, he will internalize the communities of those he values/attention he wants (example: for non-exile Andys: his father gave him his faith, his uncle gave him Autumn Grove, his other uncle gave him the Family, he found brotherhood in the military; so because THEY matter, those things matter).

So, I could see Andy valuing Marcelle’s cause (what he knows of it) and, of course, the military because it matters to Marcelle and Syfyn. So, for him it’s interchangable. The military and Plaithus become representative of Syfyn and Marcelle, they are them. (Thinking about it now, I think it is more likely a more ... unhinged Andy will be likely because I’ve never had him betrayed by the people he’s pedastaled before. The closest has been one of his uncles but the other pulled him out of there before it could get bad, and he always favored the latter uncle more anyway.)

Kendis. Is more of a one to one collector -- like. They’re stll a ‘your philisophy will come mine’ sorta person, ‘what matters to you will become mine’ but because I think Kendis is more external, it’s not as -- I don’t know. She searchers for other interests along with that? So it doesn’t become their whole personality, even though it becomes a basis? I don’t know. I think also a matter of like both are devoted characters, but Andy because he’s so Andy, that is more like knight --- there is only so much he can spread himself to. His cause, his loyalty, it is all grand but it’s focused to that few. Kendis, on the other hand, is ravenous. Kendis is one of my monster heart characters. While she doesn’t let in people a lot, she is more likely to empathize.

A part of me wondered if it was the Crawford and/or Louel influence, which I can see Esme and Sabir (and to an extent Emelin and Syfyn) emulatng. I think it is also because Kendis is just so egotistical and also So Much Love In Them Disease that leads them to being to ... I guess kin more easily. So I can see that someone like Sabir, who would be funny and bright and SHINY and reminding her of their beloved Esme, who would come in with So Much Love In Them Disease as well being all “we’re going to be the best of pals’ and Kendis in turn being ‘this one is Mine’. So much so until Sabir surpasses Emeline in the mental Straosphere Kendis semi-unconsiously puts their loved ones in.

I feel because of Sabir, the fundamental changes of Kendis would be less drastic but the priorities will likely be different. Kendis will always be Chaotic Neutral. And I can see them carving that down to satisfy Marcelle -- like I can see this Kendis being a better liar (more serious) but also more bloodthirsty, thus more short-tempered. But I very well see this Kendis being more involved.

It didn’t strike me until I finished their play through, and I might do another one eventually to solidify thoughts, but playing a Commander Kendis (which is the weirdest thought to me still, because as bossy as this bitch is and as prideful and egotistical, Kendis is Very Much a Doesn’t Answer The Call/Follow You To The Ends Of The Earth With Mild Complaining character. They surround themselves with Big Damn Heroes, and bitch about it, they aren’t one. Like I thought Keeper Kendis would be the cake but dang) reminds me of this aspect of their personality that I haven’t gotten to play much recently. At least outside of Kotsam.

Having that in mind now will sorta change my point of focus re: what they value in the game. Will it be Marcelle vs Emse & Sabir or Marcelle vs Her People. (That bit about responsibilities re: the latest update). And what is her definition of her people. Is it the people of Plaithus regardless of magical abilities or will Marcelle’s POV supercede until she is forced to see another perspective by someone she equally (and possibly, more) values?

#oc: kendis crawford louel #oc: andy yasar #the exile commander #more tl;dr no one cares about but i need to get my thoughts out or i will explode #exile the game #will i have to create another tag for them? bc crawford louel doesnt seem very mystical #ugh fucking kendis #getting on my last nerve #why must this bitch eat my brain #brainrot indeed #grapecase posts #grapes chars #i originally thought that kendis would stand down or try to minimize the damage but now i wonder would they stand aganst the military and #the crown??#like kendis doesnt give a fuck about what's not HERS #she really does not #very rarely do they pretend to #by contrast andy wants you to think he's an upstanding citizen #this is gonna be andy's arc from the fancy dressed mikaelson ( cant recall his name ) to lettng out his inner klaus on main #i have a lot more feelings about this than i expected and i havent even mused xhyera yet #idefk what im saying #grapecase metas #character analysis #am i saying anything with this #idk #but it feels good to get it out my head - so.

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wri0thesley · 3 years

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Nat😫😫😫 I'm just reading your naoya posts and I cant😫😫😫 why do I love this arrogant man😫 is it possible to write something of a connected fic to your arrangement story about how he feels jealous over a similarly docile reader (doesnt have to be connected if you dont want tho!!). like he hears about how the reader has been getting marriage proposals from other men since naoya hasnt given an affirmative to your family,,,, and now the reader is forced to consider other candidates (although she still cant atop thinking about our favourite princely asshole) and naoya cant handle this thought lol he deserves to know what angst and the pain of yearning tastes like😌 I hope this wasn't too confusing aaaa😭😭 I love your writing, and im glad youre in this jjk brain rot too🤧

patience - naoya x fem!reader (1.5k)

arrangement // patience // my jjk masterlist

warnings: naoya remains an asshole. submissive reader, arranged marriages, mentions of murder, talk of adultery. pining/angst. not sfw, minors dni!

naoya hates that he can’t stop thinking about you.

Naoya hates that he can’t stop thinking about you.

Oh, he’d meant it when he’d spat ‘pathetic’ and ‘useless’ and ‘worthless’ at you – your bloodline was unimpressive, your lack of cursed technique tragic, your clan elders absolutely idiotic for sending a nobody like you to tempt him. But . . . something about the look in your eyes, the meek little bow of your head, the way you’d listened to every one of his orders with a soft little gasp and a desire to follow them to the latter . . .

He hasn’t told your family that he’s not interested in you, but word gets around the jujutsu community when someone is looking for a spouse. After all, they’re determined to retain blood purity, to keep techniques in the bloodline – your family soon hear that Naoya is still considering all of his options. That other pretty young daughters from other bloodlines have been to see him.

(Naoya rejects them all, for frivolous reasons that he doesn’t want to admit are frivolous. He hadn’t liked the look in that one’s eyes. He didn’t want his children to inherit the colour of that one’s hair. That one had walked two steps behind him, not three--).

You haunt his thoughts. You and the bow of your head, the bite of your lip, the way you’d looked with tears brimming in your eyes. The suggestive curve of you beneath your kimono.

Ugh.

He hears, too, that your family have been exploring their other options. They’d seemed thrilled, at first, that Naoya hadn’t utterly swept you off the table – but six months have passed, and they want their daughter married and out of the house and fulfilling her duties.

He hears about your marriage proposals through that same grapevine. He hears that other men say you are pretty and quiet and obedient, that you will make a fine wife, that you will listen to commands and give soft smiles and raise children like you ought to--

And once, he smashes a glass from gripping it too hard as some nobody in the Kamo clan mentions that he’s going to ask your family for your hand in marriage.

You say no. He hears, too, that your elders are growing frustrated with your dismissals of proposals. They have left behind the thought of marrying you into the Zenin clan, but clearly you’re still clinging to the idea that Naoya might want you despite what he’d said.

He doesn’t, he tells himself, when he wraps his fist around his cock and pumps it and thinks about your look of surprise as his come splatters across your face.

He doesn’t, he tells himself, when he compares a young lady sent to entice him with you. When she looks him in the eye and he thinks that you would never do that, that you would keep your head bowed, that you’d be deferential as he needs you to be.

He doesn’t, he tells himself, as a servant cleans up the shards of glass that he shatters and he asks the Kamo clan member if perhaps he would like to spar, and he hits him just a little bit too hard so he ends up wheezing and doubled over on the training mats as Naoya stalks out of the room.

It’s not his style to pine. He has the pick of every eligible young lady in jujutsu society; he should not be hung up on such a worthless, pathetic little thing.

He hears of another proposal. This one, apparently, hasn’t been rejected straight-out – this one, you seem to be considering. Other members of the Zenin clan don’t understand why his jaw sets at the news.

“You didn’t want her, did you?” He asks. “You didn’t seem keen after the meeting.”

One of his other distant cousins, an upstart too big for his boots, grins.

“That was before she was hot property, though,” he leers at Naoya. “Our golden boy doesn’t like the idea of people coveting his trash--”

Naoya has struck him before he can think and stalked out of that room, too. Something about you has truly opened the can of worms that is Naoya’s violence, and he refuses to admit to himself that it’s because he wants you.

It’s not because you’re hot property – though, certainly, the way other men talk and laugh about you and the knowledge that you’re wanted serves to set a fire within him. It’s because he can’t stop thinking about you.

He tries courtesans. He chooses pretty, well-mannered ones who look a little like you – but their eyes when they look at him are glassy. They’re not the same as yours, brimming with life and want and confusion at the position you’ve found yourself in and the way your body responds to Naoya.

He doesn’t admit to his mistakes. He doesn’t think ‘I should have accepted the proposal, I should have joined the clans’ – instead, he thinks ‘I should have fucked them then and there. I should have made them scream my name until their reputation was ruined and everybody knew they came apart on my cock. It’s their fault that I can’t get them out of my brain.’

He walks with fists and teeth clenched and snaps at every servant who dare looks his way. Naoya has always been unpleasant, but he’s downright impossible with his spine in knots and his eyes narrowed.

He’s going to have to do it. He’s going to have to contact your family, ask for another audience, if only to get your fucking face out of his mind--

He’s not expecting to come across you before he’s even made the call, standing in one of the gardens of the Zenin estate. You’re wearing the same kimono you had first visited him in, and he hates that the sight of it makes a throb low in his belly as he remembers seeing it crumpled on his bedroom floor. He swallows as he stalks towards you and you turn, your pretty eyes widening – he sees the flash of memory, the flash of desire. He wonders if anybody would dare speak to him if he took you right here, in the garden--

An older man opens a door behind you.

Naoya recognises him only vaguely. The Zenin estate is swarming with various, less important Zenins; this one’s a great-uncle, perhaps? Or a cousin thrice removed? He’s someone unimportant in the grand scheme of things, save for the way that he walks up to you and wraps an arm around your waist.

“Ah,” the man with his hands on Naoya’s property says. “I see you’ve met my betrothed.”

His heart stops cold. He’s nobody. Unimportant. Nothing.

He’d called you the same thing; an ‘act of charity’. So why does the sight of an arm around you attached to a man too old and not powerful enough to be a threat make Naoya feel like he’s chewing rocks? Naoya manages to spit out a;

“Congratulations.”

“Yes,” the old man (great cousin? Naoya doesn’t make a habit to remember people he can’t use later on) says, pulling you closer, groping at your hip through the kimono as you keep a sedate, smile on your face without looking directly into Naoya’s eyes. “You’ll be seeing her around a lot. I hope she didn’t bother you.” A squeeze to your ass, this time, shameless. “Say hello to the future leader of the clan, sweetheart.”

(At least this man’s on Naoya’s side, he tries to console himself, but it doesn’t work.)

“H-hello, sir,” you say, and your voice is as tremulous as he remembers it. His cock stirs. He hates this.

“Sorry to bother you,” he inclines his head politely and tugs on your arm, pulling you away, leaving Naoya kissing his teeth and trying to not simply slit the man’s throat with the knife in his hakama and take you for his own.

What had the scum said? ‘You’ll be seeing her around a lot’. He supposes, then, that you’ll be sequestered in one of the other chambers in the Zenin estate--

A slow smile spreads across his face.

You wouldn’t say ‘no’ to your clan leader, would you? And . . . your future husband is old. Any Zenin is a Zenin, is it not? Even if a son is born with Naoya’s features, Naoya’s technique . . . nobody would say anything to him about it. And you’re in reach. Close to him.

He only needs to get you alone before the wedding to make sure he gets to take your maidenhead. He hates the thought of another man’s filthy hands on you, but accidents happen all of the time--

And then you’ll be a widow. You won’t be expected to marry for a while. And if you’ve already borne fruit and proved yourself – perhaps Naoya will even play the chivalrous leader and lower himself to take you for his own.

Yes. Just a little patience.

This is an arrangement he can get behind.

#naoya x reader #naoya zenin x reader #naoya smut #naoya zenin smut #not sfw #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #writing #afab reader #fem pronouns #arranged marriage for ts #misogyny for ts #Anonymous

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