#his name is elliot btw! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hiaon · 1 month

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How bout oc x male robot reader?

Reader is a robot made to make life easier for other people, basically cleaning, cooking, teaching, etc. but there's a hidden feature that allows him to help people with sexual needs.

All bots are unique, cuz people get to customize them, from their hair to their clothes, but something that not many people know is that you can customize their dick size and tightness.

Male robots are programmed to be tops and female bots to be bottoms. But Oc manages to make reader a bottom somehow?

Bots are also really humanoid from their body to their personality, mean they can 'feel' pleasure.

My sweet angel

Programmer!Oc x Robot!BottomMale!Reader

Better late than never right? Btw don't be shy writing a request because sometimes I have a lot of motivation but also, no idea what to write at all 🥸.

Disclaimer: Sexual intercourse, & Dacryphilia

There is this company that grew a lot since it changed a lot of lives of the people a lot.

The company ' RoboNet ' grew because of their futuristic bots. It's decades advanced to other robots, and human like bots that you customize to your liking.

Either having it as a male or female. Long hair or short.. Even how they look like you can customize, it set the world on a storm on wanting one. Even one of this bots can make you famous in social media, so you'll be getting your money back when you buy the bot.

Their freakishly human like attitude, and actions left a huge mark on the lives of others for the better.. It also left a huge mark on the adult content industry.

Not only they can do whatever you want with the robots body.. The robots have a special system that only adults have access, their program is pretty simple.

The women is always bottom, and the man is always top. And, Elliot. He didn't like that, I mean sure it was fine for others, but no options for sexually frustrated gay man like him. So today, in his basement and has extensive knowledge about these types of robots because his brother is the lead programmer of the robots that RoboNet has.

Basically, he begged for his brother to teach him how to code such futuristic bots.

So now he is literally coding the man from his dream, and his brother got a model— You. — For being promoted being the lead programmer. His brother didn't really need it so he customize to Elliot's type. (He had a whole list to perfect you)

His brother pulled some strings to make changes that the other male bots didn't have, and also his brother knows how freaky is little bro is now.

He specifically tell his brother not to code you because he knows how and what he will make you become. You.

Finally, he's done coding. He's so ready to meet his literally ideal partner.

And finally the moment he have been waiting for, opening ideal partner.

*TURNING ON*

"Please Choose a Name." You said, and Elliot was just shocked because that how he imagine you sounding like!

"Y/n" Elliot said, nervous.

"Thank you for choosing a name, Please wait." Elliot is practically scratching to just hold you, just sitting there opening up for him.. I mean literally.

You finally opened your eyes, and looked at Elliot.

"Hello... Uhm." You avoided your eyes from him because he was just starting so much. Yes, Elliot noticed.

"Oh! Sorry about that, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. M-my name is Elliot." Elliot already wants you so much because you we're literally what he was longing for for so long..

From head to toe, to how you talk in act, and just how you're there just fiddling your thumbs, sitting there.

"It's okay." You said, Damn. Elliot doesn't know what to do, he didn't really came in prepared. He was just so excited to have a chat with you, literally his dream man.

But then he remembered, he programmed you to really like baking. Like really like it.

"Uhm.. D-do you want to bake with me?" Elliot feels like he is an highschool girl that asking out her crush on out a date. Elliot is already feels embarrassed Infront of his ideal partner.

He saw your eyes sparkle, and he was holding for his self-control even second that your with him. His heart is going to explode from all of this happening.

"I would love to bake with you." You finally looked into his eyes.

Elliot knew this was going to be a little bit harder to contain himself with you, but he knew it isn't going to be for long.

When baking, the tention surrounding you two earlier melted down into two people just baking and having fun. But this situation didn't really stop Elliot for having a boner from time to time, because you kept reminding him on how much he wanted you.

And now, and finally, this was his last straw when he got some cream in his mouth and you decided it was a good idea it lick it.

Wait, did he programmed you to do such sly things?

After that, Elliot couldn't handle it anymore and bend you over the counter.

"Ugh! I'm sorry.! I didn't mean to lick it.." You we're embarrassed that you we're being bent over in the kitchen counter.

"Then why did you lick it then?" Honestly, Elliot is smiling so hard like a highschool girl got to go to prom with her crush.. You really are perfect for him.

"I don't.. know.." You said just trying to avoid his eyes, but you can't because you are stuck with him bending you in the counter. Also, you didn't know why you licked him! You just went for it when you saw you had a chance..

Elliot is smiling like an idiot, and even blushing on how you blush. Like, wow it looks actually like human being blushing. His brother did a good job!

"Is it okay if I have sex with you?" He just have to make sure, because consent is the best thing for a first time.

"Erm.. S-sure.." You we're blushing so hard, especially your ears. They are angry red, and Elliot finds that adorable. You're so perfect.

Elliot didn't waste time in taking off his pants and your shorts, and holy crap your ass is huge. Ahem! Anyways—

Elliot couldn't resist on slapping your ass, he was mesmerized, it looks like it moves like jelly. It earned an surprised squeal from you.

He became harder because of the sound you made, and your body was made to leak out of your ass and of course your member. But this is probably on of the first kind it's kind that they have made,

His brother really our done himself by doing this for his younger bro. Elliot will be forever be in his debt. Since you looked ready and all lubed up,(with your own lube-like liquid coming out of your ass) he entered.

When he entered, you definitely need to get used to his size. After all this was your very first day and he didn't even controled himself when you just licked his face. You just know a lot of stuff will happened like this in the future.

"Are you okay-?" "Y-yes I'm fine... You can m-move now" Y/n cuts him off, he wanted him to start already.

Even if Elliot was a little experienced (he mostly spend time masturbating to random pornography.) He exactly knows what to do to you in this situation, his only goal is to make you feel good.

So he did what you asked for, he started off slow, when he saw that you we're handling it well he started to go faster. Now it got to the point where you we're moaning a lot, and he liked that so he kept speed steady.

"Uhg..n! Y-your so perfect Y/n!" You may have not heard him because you we're to cock drunk to even thing at that ever moment, but if you did you would have be blushing hard again.

"Y-you look so p-pretty! Ugh.! Being fucked l-like this haaa.." He truly meant ever damn words that was just randomly being thrown at you.

He noticed you we're crying, but you didn't say anything, so he thought it was out of pleasure. Fuck, he like— no. Loves seeing you like this. He wanted to see more so he broke the pace by being even faster.

That set up to be the right thing to do because he got what he wanted. You we're crying because of to much pleasure, and the moaning surely was currently being heard by the poor neighbors.

"So fa-fast! Ahg!" You moaned while pretty tears fall perfectly from your eyes.

5 minutes have pasted and you are finally getting ready to let out his load. As well as Elliot. Elliot didn't expect you to hold out for this long for him, he was so proud of you.

"Ugh.! Ima 'bout to come.! Ha..." You moaned out to him.

"T-then come my baby boy." When he said that you came, and he came after.

He bathed you and made you drink water because caring for your loved once is always good. You need rest so he carried you to bed.

"Good night my sweet angel" Kissed your forehead and lips. Because only one kiss is a bummer.

You two slept like babies.

#oc x male reader #x male reader #x you #oneshot #gay #male reader smut #smut #bxb

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mysticalsoot · 1 year

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dadbur hc's to feel something

a/n; I am struggling to write full fledged fics rn so I let the brainrot win and I've now done...this. don't ask. also, thank you to lilly and elliot for decided what hc's I was meant to write, y'all are awesome and I love you both dearly<3

warnings; not much!! mentions of pregnancy, health issues (just general idea), pain mentions, this may worsen baby fever, sorry not my fault, blame wilbur.

reader is gn but in some cases afab!! (it's optional to read those parts, dw!)

masterlist (requests are open btw!)

—★—

- absolutely hated children as a teen and early 20-something

- babysat one baby of his friends and it was over for him

- absolutely adored that little baby and nearly cried when he had to leave them

- now as a husband, he wanted a kid so bad

- constantly gushing when he passes by baby shops or just melts when he sees a baby

- horrible baby fever. sorry to you.

- won't ever push the issue, but still mentions it and communicates clearly that he does want kids but he especially wants kids with you. heart melted

- if you don't want kids at the moment, he will absolutely respect that and will definitely do his best to shut up during bouts of baby fever

- I mean how could he not!! they're so adorable!!

- once you do actually have a kid, regardless of what way—he's doing anything and everything he can to prepare.

- he's buying parenting books; how to create healthy habits with your baby, how to raise a compassionate child, what to do and what not to do when becoming a parent

- he bought soo many baby outfits and onesies—all the way up to a year old. even grabbed some premie sizes, just in case.

- the nursery was set up almost immediately, a nature theme. he suggested a Minecraft theme but you shot that down immediately. there was pouting involved.

- but, you came to a compromise; dark green walls, light yellow accents, browns, etc. you even let him make Minecraft bees out of those wooden blocks and you thought they were the cutest thing ever. there were also stuffies of Minecraft animals scattered on shelves and on furniture. (please take Amazon away from this man, it's so dangerous).

- in the case of pregnancy; he was very insistent on being sure that both baby and you were in perfect health. and he never let you do more than he thought was appropriate.

- dishes? nope that's a father's job. going down the stairs? right by your side, watching your every step and yes, will make you hold his hand.

- to most others he was overbearing—but he was always like that and the whole pregnancy thing just enhanced it

- Wilbur is anxious and he never does well with medical or health things at all, his mind constantly running wild with various possibilities. it was scary for him.

- so yes, you'd get off dish nights and would be chaperoned down the stairs.

- but he also made sure you had your medicine on time, he documented every pain and complaint you had.

- he had already learnt the face you made when you were in any sort of pain—so he was right on top of it almost immediately.

- asking what hurt, what number of pain, how he could help, etc.

- he is an absolute sweetheart all of the time, but his softness was brought out by the entire experience.

- when the baby was born, or rather adopted—whichever way it happened—he cried. he cried a lot.

- he held the little one so gently, but so tightly in his arms

- he was insistent to not push gender roles onto the kiddos, but he did have two names picked out for a boy or a girl (or rather you picked them out and he agreed with them before you told him the reasoning)

- Willow for a girl and Spencer for a boy

- you didn't tell him until after the name was finalized that both options were after him

- he was so flustered and jokingly scolded you, but in reality, he loved it

- he felt so happy and so proud

- so joyful that you felt he was worthy enough to indirectly name a child after him, your child, his child.

- he was an absolute sweetie to the little one, and they took very quickly to him as well—immediately grasping onto his fingers as soon as they had the ability and cooing any time they saw him

- it melted his heart each and every time and it never stopped

- when the little one was older, they often took up the habit of grabbing at his hair or his glasses and sometimes his ears

- you found it to be the cutest thing ever and so did he he cried almost every time

- they absolutely adored their father, and if you didn't know better, you'd say they liked him better than you!

- when it came time to go back to work, to back to gigs and shows with Lovejoy

- Wilbur took off two weeks of work entirely beforehand, just to spend with you and the little one

- obviously he'd been on some sort of break since the baby was born/adopted/etc, but he still did things here and there, streamed a couple of times, went into the studio occasionally, etc

- but now that he was going to be physically gone a lot more, he knew he had to spend it wisely. and wisely did he spend it.

- most of the time was spent lying in bed with you on one side, him on the other and the baby lying on their back between you too.

- you'd both coo at them, tickle them, and talk to them

- oh did Wilbur love to sing to them, anything at all!

- he even came up with a few lullabies for them

- you'd watch from the door of the nursery as he'd rock them to sleep, humming a tune or singing the lyrics he came up just for them

- it killed you and totally didn't make you want another

- he was overall the sweetest father, and it became more evident when he had to leave for a while

- he'd call every morning, lunch and dinner as long as he didn't have anything

- and he would be so so sure that it was that time for you, it didn't matter what time it was for him as long as it was that time of day for you and his little baby

- he may have FaceTimed you and the baby during a few soundchecks, shh don't tell Dave!

- he would smile so big at the camera and wave at your little one

- he'd show them off to his band mates and they'd all coo at the little one, talking about how much alike they look like you and wilbur

- you personally thought they looked most like their father, his eyes, lips, ears. they might as well have been a spitting image of him! you looked at baby photos too

- Wilbur, on the other hand, begged to differ. he was very very insistent they looked just like you and nothing like him.

- it was most likely perception and bias that caused you both to think this way, but neither of you really cared all that much

- on days he couldn't call, for whatever reason, sometimes you'd play one of his old streams on the TV.

- the little one always responded to his voice and it seemed to calm them, usually into a sleep

- so just chatting streams and ycgma were go tos for sleepless nights lovejoys stuff kept them up and giggling

- when he was there for sleepless nights, he'd walk them around in his arms and talk about the most random things until they fell asleep

- he even offered to baby wear a lot more than most fathers did

- he just wanted to be close to them, and it always gave you a break, so he thought it'd be a double deal

- and it was! you'd get your nap, and so did the baby and Wilbur would just be gushing over his little one a few tears always shed

- he would sit with the baby on his leg when he was at his desk working, one arm snaked around them and his other on his mouse or keyboard

- at first, working was very cumbersome with the kiddo but he eventually found a work flow that worked and bouncing them on his knee helped keep things calm

- you were both hesitant to show your child on the internet and you didn't for a very long time, while people knew of them, it wasn't like photos were posted or they showed up on stream

- until, when the kiddo was about 2 or 3, they decided they missed their daddy and went running into the office when you weren't looking (I'll be using Willow as an example)

"Daddy!" Willow yelled or rather screamed out in that typical toddler way, running over to her dad's office chair.

She didn't know her father was live or working and she was much too young to understand it anyway—and the color drained from Wilbur's face when he realized. It was much too late now, chat was already spamming "Dadbur?!?" and "Baby Gold!!!"

Willow did her best to climb the side of her dad's chair before he sighed, a big smile on his face and he lifted her up by her armpits and placed her on his knee, first facing him so the camera didn't see.

"You wanna be on camera, sweetie?" He asked, realizing now how much trouble he may get in with you—but the giggle from his daughter and the smile on her face was so worth it, he didn't care.

"Yeah! Yeah!" And so he turned her around to face his PC and the camera.

"Wave to chat, lovebug!" He snaked his arm around her waist and waved with his own hand, his head dipped down to watch her. He had the softest, most loving smile on his face. He loved his little girl so so much, and he knew how it showed.

Willow waved and giggled, "Hi chat!!" and chat began spamming; "Baby Gold, hi!!" and "WILLOW!!"

It was the cutest thing he had ever seen.

And he desperately hoped he wouldn't get in too much trouble.

He spent the rest of the stream talking to chat, but mostly looking at his little girl as he conversed with her.

- it was over by then, and the little kiddo would make an appearance as much as you would allow

- and you were far from angry—you cried when you saw the clips—you were just frustrated he didn't go to you first yet you realized, he couldn't. your kid was much too like his father and much much too like you. stubborn and energetic.

- they only got more sassy and opinionated as they grew, and they most definitely became a spitting image of wilbur

- maybe #2 would look more like you

- oh, and don't let him wear plain tshirts unless you want more kids, that's all I'm saying

tags; @lillylvjy @lvrboysoot (if you want to be on a taglist thing, just send an ask and I'll add you!)

#wilbur soot x reader #wilbur soot headcanons #wilbur soot should be a dad #/j #i cannot stop thinking about dadbur #dadbur #dadbur headcannons #dadbur is my kryptonite<3 #wilbur soot #wilbur #cc!wilbur #cc!wilbur x reader #cc!wilbur soot #wilbur soot x gn!reader #wilbur soot x y/n

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tree-obsession · 2 months

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Aventurine, the Waste Land, the black hole, and luck- analysis on aventurine's possible fate

possible spoilers for 2.1 trailblaze mission

possible tws for suicide/suicidal idealization, mentions of slavery, and a massacre

ok there is. a lot to unpack for this mission but I would like to focus on the references to The Waste Land (by T.S. Elliot, fucking amazing poem btw) that were in Aventurine's parts?

First of all the achievements- the "Sibyl, what do you wish for?" and "She answers, I wish to die" or something like that. That is the very first thing in the poem we see- to put a long story short, it's a reference to how there was this oracle named Sibyl in Greek Mythology, blessed to live forever by Apollo. Apollo got angry after she refused to have sex with him and cursed her so that while she would live forever, her body would slowly waste away, eventually becoming dust kept in a jar. A couple of boys one day come up to this prison jar and ask her "Sibyl, what do you wish for?" and then she answers that she wants to die. This could be a reference to Aventurine, who is always so lucky but at that moment truly didn't wish to be lucky, and really did want to die. Yet he was stuck, unable to live- considering he is something of a "chosen" of Gaiathra Triclops, she could be the one who cursed him, in disguise of a "blessing" of good luck.

second, the maze scene. there were two references here, both from the fifth(fourth? it's been a hot minute since I read this poem, the details aren't all clear) part of the poem. it talks about a deserted waste land, where rain never falls, there is only lightning and rocks/sand. this matches up with descriptions of sigonia, as a desert planet that's referred to as "the unclaimed desolation", and also some of those lines are directly said in the white text that floated around the maze(which i'll be referring to as floating text from now on). the second reference was also in the floating text, which talks about how "there is another presence/person beside us", or something very similar. I don't have the direct quotation, but this is also a direct reference- within the poem, there are two travelers in this "waste land", and the narrator mentions feeling a presence that wasn't truly there. According to Elliot himself, his inspiration for this part of the poem was from an account of an Antarctic journey, where the person who wrote the account said he and his men were so out of it due to exhaustion they had begun to hallucinate another presence who wasn't actually there. this is probably referencing how mini-aventurine and present-aventurine both exist, and have existed, but the future-aventurine technically does not exist yet and literally is just popping up, clearly not "real" in the physical sense but definitely there. within the poem, there are a lot of speculations between scholars about why Eliiot decided to add this hallucinated dude in but one popular theory is that it's Christ, in disguise, which is really interesting considering The Family's Christian imagery. something to watch out for when Aventurine returns to the story (he def isn't dead, but as to when he's returning... :( i can't get my hopes up) or if anyone else analyzes this more deeply.

now, why the waste land? it's universally considered a pretty depressing poem, about how the world after World War I was torn apart and collapsing in on itself, and portrays a lot of characters who aren't living life to their fullest at all. it references many famous texts and literary works, pointing at literature as an amalgamation of all other literature and also acting as a metaphor for how everything builds off each other, so one thing collapsing could result in everything collapsing. there are a lot of references to different religions as well. perhaps the best way to put it is that Elliot was portraying a world under threat of total collapse, and asks the reader if there is anything humanity can do to save it, or if we must simply salvage what we can. the ending also implies peace is a far-off, perhaps unreachable thing since everything is so discordant. but you get the idea at this point- the poem is about decay and rotting over time. I don't have the greatest grasp on either this poem or aventurine's psyche, but the 2.1 quest revealed a lot- he is an incredibly lucky person who is in a lot of bad situations but gets out every time, and has never lost a bet (despite his life otherwise being absolutely terrible). the waste land itself could simply be sigonia, and then perhaps aventurine himself is a representation of the characters within the poem. practically all scholars agree that in this poem, all the female characters coalesce into one character, and the male characters do so too, and then there is one uniting character between the "male" and "female"- tiresias, who according to Elliot has "foreseen and foresuffered all". he is described as the most important figure in the poem by Elliot himself. Tiresias is an androgynous figure, but is referred to with he/his. he also is the only one to say "I" in the poem, and despite the fact he is blind he can see all, even the future- in mythology, he was a prophet like the Sibyl. "what Tiresias sees is, in fact, the substance of the poem", as Elliot says- in other words, what he sees seems to be the closest thing to the truth you will get.

now obviously that's pretty valuable, considering literally everyone is lying in penacony (in the livestream they said the entire guest list is filled with question marks in place of names, implying everyone's identities there were fake- other than Sparkle's, but she's a Masked Fool and will trick people just for the hell of it, so not exactly the best ally). however (this is where speculation starts) I think this could be possibly very subtle foreshadowing for Aven's return! and I know this may sound delusional but. it's established he's not dead. his stone is out, but that's quite possibly because he's next to a fricking black hole and also Acheron possibly had "freed" him, in some sense? that conversation he had with her obviously changed a lot of things for him as a character, and she said she could break the harmony's bonds on him... also, clearly if he wasn't dead while waking up next to a black hole, that's certainly a surefire way to tell his luck hasn't run out yet. the entire mission was spent establishing his luck is perfect, given by the goddess of his planet, and will never fail him. this is like near emanator-level shit- obviously not quite in terms of any special power, but he was specifically chosen by this goddess, was born on a special day, and due to sheer luck is the last one standing of his clan (apparently). literally everything was set up against him and he's only still alive due to a literal goddess-given power, which is absolutely nuts and almost overpowered if it weren't for the fact that he also seems to be in many scenarios where luck and gambling is the only way to get out at all. the massacre, the enslavement, killing his old master, the weird warlord thing that got brought up, penacony... his luck is purely for getting out of bad situations, it seems.

that was kind of a tangent. anyway! the whole mission was establishing how good his luck was. he got into this situation where the only solution is to walk into a black hole and see the other side of penacony- that is a classic example of "there is an extremely, extremely narrow chance of getting out alive". acheron did it, or something similar, so clearly it's possible- but luck and chance would be the only way. this is the cycle of his life- he's in an absolutely shitty situation, but he will get out due to luck. imo it's a terrible idea writing-wise to keep him explicitly alive up to the very end and going into a situation- alive- which he can survive in due to his luck, right after giving him fulfilling conversation with both acheron and his past self and seeing the uplifting note from Ratio... just to offscreen him, or kill him for some reason related to this "other side of penacony". it wouldn't line up with all that we know about him now. granted, I can't imagine it'll be pleasant and his mental state will be even worse at the end of it... but he'll be alive, and he's made it through a lot of hellish situations. he might not like his luck all the time, and it can be either a blessing or a curse given the scenario, but he's kind of stuck with it- until he withers away, just like Sibyl. Death does seem to be inevitable, but as of right now it's not knocking on his door.

tldr: for now, our boy isn't dead and his luck might be a curse to him but it's clearly going to keep him alive for quite a bit longer :)

tysm for reading and have a nice day!

#honkai star rail #hsr #aventurine #hsr spoilers #my fav poem and my fav character #whoo!!!#acheron #(mentioned)#hsr theory #honkai star rail theory #kakavasha #my beloved <<<333 #i wanted to squish mini-aventurine's cheeks SO BADLY whenever he came onscreen

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yaoyaobae · 6 months

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Hi yao yao how are you I hope your fine!! Honestly I'm only here to ask for a request it's a small one , but first I wanna say I really REALLY LOVE HOW YOU CREATE RSA CHARACTERS LIKE SPECIALLY: ELLIOT CENDRE, RIELLE, AND JASIM AND SO MUCH MOREE!!! Keep it up your art is mesmerising and very beautiful to look at, I will cut to the chase now. So I have mc I created her name is eliana a long time ago and I have been wanting to make her interact with your rsa characters cuz your designs are honestly perfecto may I have the honour to draw them with her??? *p.s I will mention you ofc I'm ought to do that, tho still it's okay if it's not possible and thank you for reading my ramble XD♡☆☆☆☆*

Hello! Sure go ahead and thank you so much. 🥹🩷

BTW To those who sent a request regarding use of my characters in your fics/art, I am ok with it as long as you credit me or leave a link to my account! I don’t respond alot on tumblr so please send me a DM through twitter if you need permission, thank you.

Roleplay/Rewriting/Claiming you own my characters are not allowed 🙏🏻

#questions

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boringkate · 5 months

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I watched Lena Dunham's Sharp Stick (2022) with a babe last month. Which I absolutely loved!!!

It's never explicitly acknowledged, but the main character is clearly supposed to be (despite the producers claiming otherwise) in some way neurodivergent. Or something. She's meek and impossibly sexually naive (to the point where me and the girl I watched it with had initially assumed the character was intended to be a child). Apparently they had approached an autism sexuality advocate to work as a consultant for the film before backpeddling.

Trans girls tend to be autistic.

The main character also had a hysterectomy (as did Lena Dunham).

Trans girls tend to be infertile.

She's shown taking estrogen.

Trans girls tend to take estrogen.

She becomes obsessed with porn and begins having one night stands with random men from the internet in hopes of finding validation by proving her sexual desirability.

Trans girls tend to do that shit.

It ends with her realizing and leaning into her impregnation fetish (while getting fucked by the one black guy she knows who had just brought over some 40s and called them homies and also while her black step sister's hands unexpectedly drift in from off screen to hold her because even when she managed to push it off to the last second Lena Dunham is incapable of being chill and normal about race).

Trans girls can't go ten seconds without making the same joke about how if you don't think you can get a trans girl pregnant then you just aren't trying hard enough (and the frequent fetishization of black men in trans and especially neighboring sissy communities can't really be denied).

Also the bartender is played by Tommy Dorfman (a trans woman) with it being her first time playing a character with a girl name.

But I'm not trying to suggest it's intentionally a movie about the tgirl excperience. That would be silly. Really the takeaway should be that (no matter how varied women's lives may be) we (trans women and cis women etc) can still always find common ground and shared excperiences. We're all in this together.

But anyways I was looking at Lena Dunham's Instagram yesterday (I've been off and on again rewatching Girls, so she's stayed on my mind).

One post features the music video she directed starring famed trans girl Hari Nef.

Another post shows that she recently read trans boy Elliot Paige's memoir Paige Boy.

Another post shows a conversation she had with Jon Bernthal (on his podcast) where she explains the word cis to him and talks about having also explained it to her husband (this is the only clip from her appearance on the podcast that she chose to post).

BTW did you know that she was an executive producer for the 2021 show Genera+ion (which I recall featuring a trans boy actor playing a cis boy character who gets a girl pregnant).

Fascinating!

Meanwhile. Ten years earlier. In 2013 (a year into my transition and a year before Time declared that we've reached the trans tipping point) an episode of Girls features a doorman telling one of the titular Girls that "a tranny walked in last time and he was just walking around the floors, but it was nothing." (lmao)

UPDATE: s05e02 features a "did you just assume my pronouns" bit. (in a way that felt reactionary and gross because the theyfab saying it was an absurd hipster barista that the audience isn't intended to sympathize with)

UPDATE UPDATE: s06e02 features the leader of a group for women entrepreneurs saying "For those of you asking on our Facebook if the group is open to trans women: The answer is: We don't know. Okay?" (which I thought was fun)

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE: s06e03 (the literal next episode) "I even went to a couple of hookers and one of them had a dick."

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theredcuyo · 1 month

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So, like i said before, i married Elliot in My second playtrhu

And this funny thing happened were our kid was born while he wasn't at the farm

You see, he asked around sometime in summer for a child and i was just like yeah sure, kids are fucking useless not a problem or anything and it's not like the game reflects on it (even if i'm a girl) so why not

I kinda forgot about it except for his few reminders, and then we got to his birthday, i took a bottle of ink out of a chest to give him and when i went out the cutscene for his 14 heart event started

And he says he'll go for like a week or something?, and i'm like sure it's fine i missed him so mUCH

And i thought, oh well, the kid thing will take longer i guess or something, because that counts as a event, right?, and Elliot's event doesn't happen if in the next days there's a another one

But then i woke up to fall 8 with the message that farmer had given birth during the night to a baby girl

And i laughed so hard my stomach still kinda hurts

Because this man, the guy who forever lives in his honeymoon face, the guy who sent letters every day for a week away from his partner, You know, the same guy who wrote his whole book mostly because the person he had a crush on, just missed his daughter's birth (who, btw, i named Ophelia, just cause i think it fits him)

Basically, he went on a short trip and his wife had their kid

Alone

In the middle of the night

LMAO

In my personal canon, Ophelia is a premature baby and it's likely at fault because i went to the mines for stuff i needed for an oil maker just the day before (And Elliot wouldn't have left if he knew she was soon to be born)

Also, now add that in his letters he says this things:

"P.S. I hope you had a peaceful night, and weren't too scared all alone in that big house!"

"I'm sure your time has been much more exciting! I can't wait to return and see what progress has been made."

"Just don't stay out too late in the mines, my love. It's dangerous in there! If you must go... bring plenty of food."

He probably cried himself to despair when a still sleepy farmer pointed upstairs after welcoming him and he just saw a baby and realized what happened

#elliot stardew valley #stardew valley elliot #stardew valley #stardew farmer #fun shit that happened to me #also i married haley in my first playtrhu if ya wondered #i dont regret it at all #i love them both so mUch #like i literally planted mostly only sunflowers for her #even with joja destroyed #and i have a pond of squids just so elliot can have infinite ink #in my personal canon farmer didnt even mind having the baby alone #bc like farmer kinda dies in daily basis on the Skull caverns #and she just knew there was no way Elliot coulve known #but farmer likes teasing him about it

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bonefall · 8 months

Note

sorry for the trivial question, feel free to ignore

i've been curious if you have any songs you associate with Bumble (canonic or bb)

for me it's "Smooth criminal" by Michael Jackson and "Don't lose ur head" from six the musical, maybe someday i'd draw a pmv for each of them

love the new ask button design btw

For BB!Bumble, I feel like Constellations by the Oh Hellos is her song. It's about the fall of the Tower of Babel, but also... the way that things explode and change, the loss of meaning after something you love has gone away, how everything is a sort of interpretation.

The opening lines especially bring to mind the First Battle, and its buildup.

How she couldn't translate fast enough, Clear Sky, Thunder Storm, and Tall Shadow eventually ignoring her to shout at each other in Tribemew, The Wind Runner demanding Bumble give the words to her so SHE can shout, King Arc losing patience just wanting his son back.

The way she can feel that it's all about to topple down, the building fury, the horrible dawning that she's lost control and is about to be in the middle of the battlefield.

I can feel it on my tongue; brick and mortar Thick as scripture, drawing lines in the sand and laying borders As tall as towers I babble on until my voice is gone This hill I'll die on is about 90 meters of bricks Coloured indigo, and inscribed with my name, and lined with cedar But the words fall flat like Cymbals crashing, like molars gnashing

The invocations of "constellations" later in the songs also strikes me a certain way, with Bumble in mind. She wasn't raised with a star-based religion. How strange must it have been, for the strength of belief of all the other cats to make it real?

'Cause like constellations a million years away Every good intention, every good intention Is interpolation, a line we drew in the array Clinging to the faces, clinging to the shapes in the silence

The idea that it's all lines we drew, to make meanings. She is a character who grapples with that, too, her own self-worth, purpose, and meaning in early ThunderClan. Especially when (ironically, considering the story of the tower of babel), the languages start to merge into Clanmew and her work isn't needed like it was.

And the end of the song has that, too.

Like constellations imploding in the night Everything is turning, everything is turning And the shapes that you drew may change beneath a different light Everything you thought you knew will fall apart, but you'll be all right

It's her song, in my mind.

I also really like songs from Cass Elliot in her mouth. Make Your Own Kind of Music, Dream a Little Dream of Me, New World Coming, etc.

#bone babble #song talk

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samglyph · 4 months

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This is the boy featured in my hourlies btw his name is Elliot and he’s the only thing keeping me together rn.

#everytime someone is in my notes being negative when I was trying to be neutral leaning positive about something I just glance at his face #sweet boy #dogs

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fairytale-poll · 5 months

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ROUND 3A, MATCH 3 OUT OF 4!

Propaganda Under the Cut:

Giselle Lai:

Girlie has 3 different possible princes and one is the princess! Need I say more? I will anyway! She gets the Cinder nickname from her first love interest because she snuck out of home through the chimney to try and meet up with the princess. She falls into the lap of her second love interest the next day when eavesdropping on him from a tree, and then the princess steals her away for the afternoon. The princess literally says she won't get married if it means she'll never see Giselle again and they almost kiss. Girl is such a powerful Cinderella, she has 3 bad bitches to choose from!

This webtoon turns this fairytale entirely on its head. Giselle is actually a noblewoman - well, girl. She has a mother who cares about their reputation as Giselle's father is dead. Her two older sisters are trying to find husbands but seem to be nice, in a sisterly kind of way. But the reason she's a Cinderella candidate is because her mum forbids her to go to the circus. And, when Giselle tries to sneak out as the three of them are leaving for a ball, her mum locks her into her room. So, determined as she is, Giselle manages to climb out of the chimney and out into the city. She's covered in soot and forgets to take money, so she's unable to get in through the front of the tent. Instead, she has to sneak in and meets Ashe. He/They is part of the act and Giselle gets caught up in it. Since he doesn't know her name, Ashe begins calling her Cinder-girl. Also, Giselle was meant to meet the princess to go to the circus, but meets her later in the park, where it's very obvious that the princess is in love with Giselle. And who Giselle might be attracted to, as well! AND, there's also Lord Elliot, who's not actually Lord Elliot, but a guy posing as a dead guy, who may or may not want to marry Giselle when she comes of age or marry one of her sisters. Also, also! The butler looks away when Giselle sneaks in and out, enabling her to be able to "go to the ball", as it were. There's a lot going on and the comic is a lot of fun. And the art is amazing! I really recommend it.

Queen Cinderella Charming:

She's kind, she's funny, she learns to use a sword, and she's related to Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, and Red Riding Hood. She helps the protagonists any chance she gets and even hosts their mother and step-father's wedding. She never gives up and never lets her fear stop her. Absolute queen (literally)

While she isn't hugely relevant in the story itself, she is always down to help out the protagonists where she can. When they need one of her slippers, she sneaks it into their bag without them noticing. She calls them family. She loves her daughter too, and is a badass mom.

When the main characters need her glass slipper for a spell, she snuggled it into their bag, and she has a daughter named Hope

I think she’s a minor character in the first book, but she’d really nice and stuff!

Because I LOVE HER!! also she has a daughter called Hope who got kidnapped by rumplestiltskin at one point but that is besides the point. She is a strong independent woman and we love those she was NOT about to sit around doing nothing and i love her for that

Vote Land of Stories Cinderella because she's the best!!!

hi uhm you are all legally obligated to vote for the land of stories cinderalla btw . please

Everyone vote for Queen Cinderella Charming!!! She deserves this!!!!!

CINDERELLA FROK TLOS. DO IT FOR ME

#cinderpoll #round 3 #round 3a #giselle lai #cinderelle #queen cinderella charming #cinderella charming #the land of stories #chris colfer #cinderella #fairytale #poll tournament #poll bracket #character polls #polls

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zackaddyy · 1 year

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hi whats up

ive been given pretty short notice that im moving from new England to texas by Jan 30th 2023

Im like so deep in medical debt and everythings expensive in NE - Our electric had doubled in price alone with gas. Both are looking to triple in price as well.

I work nearly 40 hours a week even though im disabled and it causes me alot of pain for days on end.

We are saving what we can, but if anyone could help out pls do!

We're both trans and autistic btw 👾

💳💲vënmø - AntTonySanchez

#mutual aid #anthony.txt #😔

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whiskey-tango-matcha · 1 year

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Long Day, Late Night (m)

Guys, idk what to say, clearly I’m going through a bit of a ~writing hyperfixation~ so please have this 2.5k mishmash I couldn’t get out of my mind even though I literally just posted a fic yesterday.

This one is Greyson-centric, and takes place even earlier than the last one - like just a couple months after Greyson started at the restaurant (btw, the restaurant name is Elliot’s, which you find out in this story). It’s the first time Greyson is sick at work and Elijah is *oblivious*. I hope you like it, as always I’m not about to read it before I post it so you get what you get lmao. Also as always, I love and am obsessed with you all mwah mwah ok here’s the story gtg BYE

cw: male, cold, coughing

Long Day, Late Night

The only small mercy Greyson could think of was that this didn’t happen often.

In fact, Greyson couldn’t think of the last time he’d felt this shitty. It certainly hadn’t been in at least a year; definitely not since he’d started at Elliot’s. He cursed the unspoken chef rule of never calling out, never admitting defeat, and powering through everything; maybe he should’ve taken his mother’s advice and gone into accounting. Greyson seriously doubted that accountants prided themselves on going to work sick.

Greyson pushed through the back doors of the kitchen, squinting at the bright fluorescent lights against a killer headache. Silently, he said a prayer to the universe that today would be an easy day. They had a table of 15 that was supposed to occupy most of the evening – thank god, he found himself thinking. Maybe I can get out of here early.

“Chef,” Elijah greeted Greyson as the chef walked into the office and slammed down his backpack. The GM was fervently typing out a text message, a look of frustration obvious on his face. Greyson yanked off his sweatshirt and pulled his chef’s coat off the back of his chair before returning Elijah’s greeting.

“Boss,” he said, straining against a painfully sore throat. Elijah sighed, clicking his phone off and regarding the chef once again.

“We have a problem,” Elijah said, rubbing a hand down his face. Greyson froze in the midst of buttoning his coat; those were certainly words you didn’t ever want to hear from your boss in your relatively-new position.

“Problemb being…?” Greyson asked, cringing inwardly at the congestion he could already hear in his voice. Fortunately for him, Elijah either didn’t notice or ignored it.

“The fifteen top,” Elijah said, pulling up their reservations on the computer. Greyson peeked over his shoulder and widened his eyes when he saw it.

“Forty?” Greyson asked, incredulous. “Since when has it gone up to forty?”

Elijah sighed again, defeated, and turned back to the chef. “An hour ago they called and asked if they could up their reservation; the hostess answered.”

“The ndew girl? With half a brain and huge tits?”

Elijah snorted. “Yeah. That’s the one.”

“Fuck me, Boss. Tell mbe you called them back and said we can’t do it.”

Elijah winced. “That’s the thing, Chef. It wasn’t them who called; it was the concierge at their hotel. They’re out all day, won’t be back to the hotel until after dinner. So…”

“So we can’t change it,” Greyson groaned. “Fuck. I mean, I don’t know if I even ha – ahh...ahhHSTSHH-ue! NGTSHH-oo! Snrf.” Greyson covered his nose with one hand and snatched a tissue from his and Elijah’s shared desk with the other. He cleaned himself up and crumpled the tissue in his hand before finishing. “I don’t evend kndow if I have enough product.”

“Bless,” Elijah said, distracted. “I know. It’s fucked, and I’m sorry. If we have to change their menu, we can. I’m here for you, chef. I’ll even throw on an apron if you need.”

Greyson groaned once again; of course this would happen today, of all days. The day he woke up aching and congested and with his throat on fire. The one day in his almost-three-months at his new job where he wasn’t planning on working fifteen hours. Greyson bit his cheek against the frustration he felt building inside him and turned back to his boss.

“It’s ok,” he said, attempting a smile. He clapped a hand onto his boss’s shoulder and grabbed his knife bag. “We’ll mbake it work. Thanks for the offer, b – HNGSTH-ue! HRSHH! HFTSHH! Huhhh...Hhh...hnnn.” Greyson swore from the crook of his elbow, cursing that final stuck sneeze. He grabbed another tissue, before thinking twice and grabbing the whole box to take with him.

“Bless, chef. And thank you, you’re a beast,” Elijah said, turning back to the computer once again. “Oh, and one more thing: we still have that tasting with the owners of that winery upstate today. They’ll be in at two – can you still come taste with me?”

Greyson raised an eyebrow and sucked in through his stuffed-up nose again. “Uh. Sure, boss. I’ll mbake it a priority.”

“Appreciate it,” Elijah said, turning to smile at the chef for a moment. “Let me know if you need anything from me.”

***

It wasn’t that Greyson was mad; it wasn’t even that he was disappointed. If anything, Greyson was just...confused.

Don’t get him wrong, Greyson was usually the first person to deny a cold. But he’d known from the moment he opened his eyes that this was no cold; he’d felt the snake-like chokehold of a fever almost immediately, and he’d devolved from a slightly stuffed nose at seven am to near-constant sneezing fits by ten. His throat was nearly closed with pain, and he could already tell that the cough was going to be a problem. He didn’t expect sympathy from his boss, but...some acknowledgment of the fact that he was clearly ill would’ve been nice.

“Huhh...NGSTHH-uhh! HehhGTZSH-ue! Fuckigg hell.” Greyson grabbed yet another tissue from the box he’d placed on his prep station and blew his nose again. His cooks had begun filing in for their shifts, and every one of them had cringed at their chef’s appearance on seeing him.

“Wow, chef,” his sous chef, Matt, had said when he joined his boss at the prep station. “That’s dedication.”

Greyson had made a noncommittal noise in the back of his throat before tossing the tissue and washing his hands. “Ndo choice,” Greyson said, turning to cough into his elbow. When the coughing fit finally subsided, he turned back to Matt. “Fifteend-top’s forty ndow.”

“Oh, Christ,” Matt said, unpacking his knives. “Of course it is. What should I jump on?”

“Butcher the filets, please,” Greyson said, pinching the bridge of his nose. “They’ll be mince mbeat if I try to do themb like this.”

“On it,” Matt said, putting his bag under the table. “You take anything for that?” he asked.

Greyson shook his head. “Ndo timbe. I’ve beend prepping since literally the mboment I walked in.” He started coughing again and Matt raised his eyebrows before striding into the server’s station. He returned a few minutes later with a steaming cup and a handful of pills.

“That’s what the servers have; not sure what they all are but it couldn’t hurt to just take them all,” Matt said, handing them and the cup of tea over to his boss. Greyson choked out a laugh.

“I feel like if anything could hurt it’s taking a savage handful of mbystery pills,” he said, tossing them all into his mouth and swallowing with a mouthful of tea. “But I’mb ndot too proud to admit when I’m desperate.”

“Chef!” Elijah called suddenly, bursting through the kitchen doors, obviously on a mission. “The people from the winery are here. Can you break away for a bit?”

Matt raised an eyebrow at Greyson, who just sighed in return. He turned towards Elijah, who was once again texting someone fervently. “Yeah boss, coming,” he said. When Elijah breezed through the doors into the dining room, Greyson turned back to his sous.

“Hold down the fort for mbe?” he asked. Matt huffed out an amused laugh.

“Sure thing, chef. Good luck, uh, tasting wine.”

“‘Tasting’ will be a strong word for it,” Greyson mumbled, untying his apron and pushing through the kitchen door.

Seated at the corner table was Elijah, a man and woman who looked to be a couple, and about thirty bottles of wine. Greyson’s head pounded at the sight of it, but he took his seat next to Elijah all the same.

“There he is, the man of the hour!” Elijah clapped Greyson on the back as he sat down, and Greyson nodded toward their guests.

“A pleasure,” he said, his voice gravelly. He cleared his throat and asked, “What’re we drinking?”

***

Greyson looked down at his watch for about the tenth time since they had sat down an hour ago. Elijah, taking notice of at least one thing about Greyson, nudged him toward the kitchen.

“Alright, Chef, thanks for your input,” Elijah said, then regarded the winemakers. “He has a big night tonight. Back to the grind, right, Chef?”

“Yeah,” Greyson said, pushing back from his seat. “Thangks, guys. Great wine. Hopefully we can make sombething work out.”

The winemakers smiled back at him easily; the woman of the couple held her glass up as if to toast Greyson. “Cheers, Chef. Hope you’re feeling better soon.”

Greyson colored, and Elijah whipped towards the chef, confused, but neither of them seemed to dissuade the woman’s partner from tacking on his own sympathies. “That sounds like one hell of a cold.”

Greyson meant to deny their accusation, or at least thank them for their kindness, but was rudely interrupted by his nose. “I – HNGSTHH-uhhnn. GTSHH! HehhITSZCHUE! Snrf.” Greyson coughed a little, if only to clear his throat, and shrugged sheepishly.

“Safe travels back,” he said in return, and headed back towards the kitchen.

Once inside, Greyson ducked into his and Elijah’s office and slammed the door shut. He’d done his damnedest to keep his symptoms under control around their guests, but now the floodgates had opened he really fucking needed to – to…

“HNGSTHH-ue! HTSZCH-ue! Huhh...nggg. Huh, huhhhHHHHUHESTZCCHUE! ETSHCCHUE! GTSCHZUE! Fuckigg – HTSHHCHUE!”

Greyson pulled a few tissues out of the box on their desk and blew his nose, thoroughly spent. This is hell, he thought, putting his head in his hands. I’ve died and gone straight to fucking hell.

He considered maybe just crawling under the desk right then and there, cocooning until he was no longer the walking plague, when someone quietly rapped on the door.

Go away, Greyson thought, but whoever it was opened the door before he could say anything. When he looked up, Elijah was standing over him, a look of confused worry on his face.

“Um,” he said, stepping into the office and closing the door behind him. “Are you...ok?”

Greyson felt his face flame once again, his embarrassment near-palpable. Was he okay? Did he look okay? Did he sound okay? For the first time all day, Greyson felt something other than the depth of his illness; he felt livid.

“Yeah, boss,” he snorted, making himself cough hard into his arm. He sucked in through his nose and stood to tower over Elijah, his watering eyes glaring daggers. “I’mb great.”

Greyson pushed past his boss, threw open the door, and headed straight into the deep frezzer to take some breaths and collect himself. The frigid air was a slap in the face, and it gave him the clarity he needed. He may not even be a blip on his boss’s radar; that was fine. He would work even harder, then – make his name even quicker and get the hell out of Elliot’s as soon as was humanly possible. Get the fuck away from this restaurant and its haughty, clueless, thoughtless owner.

The chef pulled himself together as much as he could and stepped out of the freezer. Elijah was, of course, standing right outside the walk-in.

“Chef,” he said quickly, clearly attempting to get his point across before Greyson pushed past him again. “You could’ve told me if you’re sick – I mean, I could’ve called in backup, or closed reservations…” he looked up at Greyson then, apology plastered all over his face. Greyson wasn’t taking the bait.

“Too late ndow,” he mumbled, checking his watch. “Service starts in an hour. Please; I dond’t have timbe for this.”

Once again, Greyson pushed past his boss. He made his way back to the prep table and picked his knife up, before regarding Matt.

“Tell mbe what you ndeed from mbe.”

***

Service was, to put it lightly, hell.

The forty top had gone fine, as well as could’ve been expected, and fortunately there weren’t any problems or send-backs, but Greyson was in absolute agony the entire time. He couldn’t breathe, his voice was mangled from shouting orders, and he was pretty sure he’d infected his entire staff with the insane amount of sneezing he’d done.

The moment the last ticket was stabbed, Greyson put a hand on Matt’s back and said, “You’re up. I ndeed to sit down like...now.”

Matt nodded in understanding and stepped up to the line to make sure the cooks started breaking everything down. Greyson, alternatively, tripped into the office and immediately put his throbbing head into his hands and let loose the coughing fit he’d held back the last four hours.

In the midst of coughing, Greyson heard someone quietly enter the office and sit in the chair next to him. Then he heard something else; a paper cup being placed on the desk next to him. Greyson looked up to see Elijah sitting beside him, quiet. Greyson sighed.

“I’ll pack mby shidt,” he said, rubbing an aching eye with his palm. “I’mb sure you already have sombeone lined up, but I’d be happy to spend a day just showing themb the ropes or whatev -”

Greyson was cut up by his boss reaching up mid-sentence and placing a cool hand on his forehead. Greyson couldn’t help it; he closed his eyes in relief.

“You’re burning up, Greyson,” Elijah said quietly. “Have you had a fever all day?”

The chef wasn’t sure what to say. He shrugged. “I guess,” he said quietly, his boss’s hand still on his forehead. Elijah pursed his lips and took his hand away. Unsure what to do with it, he pushed the cup closer to Greyson.

“Tea,” he said, as if it wasn’t obvious. Greyson couldn’t help but huff out a laugh.

“Okay,” he said, taking the cup. They both sat in silence for another moment, which was only broken by Greyson’s breath hitching for the millionth time that day. “Huhh..hhhNGTSHH-ue! Guhhh.” Greyson grabbed the last couple of tissues out of the box and blew his nose, miserably.

“Bless you,” Elijah said, clearly still unsure what else to say.

“Thangks,” Greyson said, crumpling the tissue and looking back at his boss. “So...am I ndot fired then?”

Elijah chuckled and looked up at Greyson again. “You’re not fired.”

“Okay,” Greyson said again.

After another beat, Elijah blurted out, “I’m sorry. Greyson, I’m really, really sorry.”

Greyson wasn’t sure what to say to that. “Umb,” he said, brilliantly. “Okay.”

“Sometimes I’m just, like, in my own world, y’know? The restaurant...it’s all-consuming, man. I’m always fuckin’ worried about it, and it just gets exhausting. I wish I had more patience and was, like, more...observant. But,” he shrugged. “I’m just...not. So I’m sorry. I’ll try harder.” Elijah sighed, post-speech, and gave Greyson a small smile. “And I’m sorry you’re so fucking sick. You look like hell.”

Greyson set his jaw then, and looked down. He was absolutely not about to let his boss see him tear up, especially not at something so fucking stupid. Instead, he took the cup of tea and sipped it slowly. “I appreciate it, boss,” he whispered. “I’mb, uh… I’mb ndot feeling awesome.” He looked up, having composed himself, and gave Elijah a loopy half-smile. “Long day. Late ndight.”

Elijah smiled back and patted the chef’s knee. “Take the weekend. Okay?”

Greyson swallowed painfully and nodded. “Okay, boss,” he said. “Whatever you say.”

#snz #snzkink #snz kink #snzfic #snz fic #sickfic #coldfic #male cold #original charater #snez #snzblr #snz blog #whiskeyswriting #damn this got sappy as hell #and long lmao #idk the way ive been going i guess ill see you guys with another fic in two days lolllll

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gaming-thoughts-by-an-idiot · 3 months

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Fable 3, fuck Logan, lil bitch

Game: do u want to be Prince or Princess?

Me: I'd like to be the third secret sex

Game: what?

Me: THE MAIN CHARACTER

Game: y-yes that's-

Me: WHO GONNA SAVE THE WORLD

Game: that's what the sex-

Me: gotta go girl, boys are so obvious, he's gonna be all proper

Game: have u ever met a man...?

Me: girls are so badass, just look at Buffy

Game:...

Me:...

"Ready to see my man... the bastard Reaver"

"Damn, the city sure got bigger in like 20? Years"

"The hen tried to fly but couldn't but they can actually fly so we were all lied to"

"Damn, children working..."

"I cant remember this part of my castle"

"Holy shit it's fucking huge omg"

"Hehe that's what she said"

"That feather had plans"

"Ew look at that hat"

"Damn my dog could've been prettier"

"Pff, do u wanna look princess-y or cool"

"Obviously I'm picking the short and movable one"

"I fucking LOVE Jasper"

"I'm standing still, I wanna hear his comments to it"

"What happens if I try to leave in my pjs"

"He just went 'are u sure?' "

"Damn, he just threw a word at me that idk what means, but I think its like 'silly' "

"I look so pretty- wtf is that hair?"

"Jasper said avoid my brother, but what kind of sister would I be if I did?"

"I'm glad the princess can talk"

"Lmao I just had like the most gangsta handshake with a guard love it"

"I'm so happy I get to pet my dog, not a fan of how she sounds tho"

"Oh wait, I think maybe since I'm playing 3rd on xbox one, but did the 2nd on 360, maybe I won't have the queen but default king..."

"I'm just walking around shaking people's hands"

"Elliot is such a.... name, and- wait... who's gonna be the girl if I'm playing as him???"

"Next time..."

"I will be EVIL and idk why that's a guy"

"Hohoho I kissed the man"

"The city doesn't look like my city :( or... are we not in bowerstone, was that the name? Jesus, I've played the 2nd game for so long and I've forgotten"

"I love we're holding hands"

"I love Walter"

"Oh no my Prince, he ran away"

Walter: I want u to fight me, like your life dependent on it

Me: wow, that doesn't sound like a tutorial at all

"I'm gonna fuck up the buttons"

"Hell ye I did not"

"Damn, thought I should end the game here so I could sleep, but apparently you can't until a spesific place in the game... oh nooo, I have to do my fave hobby? Terrible:)"

"Running with my bois<3"

"There were NOT this many doors in my castle"

"The default is king :/"

"Imo king is so vanilla, like you don't give the same respect as a queen"

"All my hard work of being a queen just gone"

"Basically next time I'm doing it all on xbox one"

"Right, war room"

"Listening in"

"Damn, I'd be upset too if I was Logan, if I had that haircut"

"Oh, same throne at least"

"Ah... here comes the choice"

"Well, as the queen... I'm a good person... until I charge rent ofc haha"

"Bye baby :("

"He loves me😭"

"My MOTHER'S daughter, thank u very much"

Game: the hero was your dad

Me: what was that?

Game: I said the her-

Me: sounded like the wind

Game: tHE HE-

Me: whatever it was, it was saying bs... I miss my queen

Game: u know what? Fuck it.

"Run run run- Where's my dog btw?"

"Oh nevermind"

"Ugh, we're gonna look at the imposter, the king"

"I mean technically, Reaver IS a hero, he's just a bad one"

"Did Logan also go through the whole grab seal, end up in front of Theresa?"

"The seer of the SPIRE???"

"The queen would've fucking whipped Logan's ass if she knew"

"I'm sensing the fanfic energy... not from that Logan thing but for Reaver"

"I'm such a simp"

"For these terrible men...

"And my queen"

"You guided my MOTHER"

"What does Theresa even do in her spare time? I bet she crochets"

"I got a glove that let's me use magic... can anyone say Link? Cuz im getting Link vibes"

"OH FOR FUCKS SAKE, STOP RUNNING IN MY WAY, YA BASTARD DOG"

"Do I get to name my hero? Or am I cursed to see 'hero' every time she speaks?"

"Do I get to name my dog?"

"Isn't the dog supposed bark when there's treasure close by? Cuz I only found that key cuz of my own memory"

"Jasper is scared of bats, he'd make a terrible batman"

Walter: did u see that Jasper???

Jasper: indeed your MOTHER would've been very proud

"Why can't I run"

"Did the queen make these tunnels?"

"What happens if I don't buy the castle in the second game?"

"Can I slut around in this game too?"

"Like mother like daughter, or is it like daughter like mother? I honestly don't know"

"What's with the gift in the symbol in the corner?"

"Thought all the transportation gates were all gone, I'm pretty sure I'm on one"

"Oh wow, look at all that winter. Just like norway"

"I can make friends by shaking hands"

"I'm gonna make everyone love me with how great I am with my hands"

"For handshakes, I meant handshakes"

"I forgot I had to go back to sanctuary to change, which is much better than just changing out into the open imo"

"Oh hell yea! Look at all those gifts!"

"Bleh the outfit is... yeah"

"Dog potion? For what?

"Pink poodle"

"Doberman"

"White poodle... who wants a poodle?"

Clockwork dog potion??? What does that even mean???"

"Setter dog potion??? What"

"Five star dog potion...?"

"That's all the gifts, i wanted a gift for myself"

"AWW I GOING WITH ALSATIAN DOG, LOOKS LIKE A GERMAN SHEPHERD OMG"

"I CAN NAME THE DOG"

"should be something fun-.... hehe"

"Betcha u can guess"

"I'm giving 10 coins to everyone, I have 129 left"

"Damn, 20coins left"

"Gotta talk to the man with the small fish name"

"What are those jester shoes"

"My mom, the queen, was busy for like 20 or something years..."

"Oh! I'm getting more gifts!"

"They better be for me istg"

"I went into a sink hole water thing and found a wedding ring"

"I think a fish is proposing to me"

"Ooo, dye"

"Are all my packages dye?"

"Tattoo set, nothing says rebel as much as this, I just got out of the castle"

"Bushy hairstyle"

"Bowerstone soldier uniform...???"

"Yule costume lmao"

"Silly outfits, dye and hair types, oh and that tattoo set"

"Out to explore more!"

#gaming #funny #relatable gaming thoughts #fable iii #fable3 #fable 3 #fable #text post

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