The thing about Kakuzu and Hidan is that I think they each think they're the normal one in this relationship and neither one of them could possibly be any further from the truth.
They're both absolute fucking freaks, but when you're writing POV, each is the straight man in his own internal narrative.
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My KakuHida Fanfic Collection
Master post of all the KakuHida fanfics I've written so far. Will be regularly updated as I continue to write more! 💖
♡ Title: Bring Me Back A Dog
♡ Story Artists: Aguz | Laziitea
♡ Summary: “I was going to feed you to my dogs.” The man remarked. Then he looked at Hidan with a dangerous, lascivious glint in his eyes. “But maybe I’ll just make you into one.” He breathed, tone shifting into something that Hidan didn’t quite like. Or maybe he did.
→Click here to read the fic
♡ Title: Desecration
♡ Story Artists: Aguz | Mmummo
♡ Summary: Was it the helplessness and pleasure that got him so aroused or the sick satisfaction of defiling something so sacred to some false god?
→Click here to read the fic
♡ Title: Insatiable
♡ Story Artists: Aguz | Fadarts
♡ Summary: Kakuzu could call Hidan the first grain of dirt that ever developed on Earth and it would still be a turn-on. The zealot lived and breathed scum. He was nothing more than a vessel for his own pleasure. And Kakuzu loved it.
→Click here to read the fic
♡ Title: Ruination
♡ Story Artists: @aguz-cm
♡ Summary: Hidan would drop to his knees at Kakuzu's feet. He would do everything he said like an obedient dog. Because in the end, all Hidan wanted was him. And Kakuzu would ensure that Hidan's mind stayed that way.
→Click here to read the fic
♡ Title: Past Your Eyes
♡ Story Artists: @aguz-cm | @fg083nrt
♡ Summary: Kakuzu was something hardly anyone wanted to be with. After all, his species came with too many extra needs with not enough rewards. So Kakuzu could not fathom why Hidan wouldn't turn him loose no matter how many times he tried to run away. Hidan was either really stupid, or really desperate.
Click here to read the fic
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I'm thinking about Kakuzu and Hidan and nail polish because ofc I am, and no I don't actually want it to be a jutsu, I want all the Akatsuki to do it the hard way
Kakuzu
he learns quickly and doesn't see why others have trouble with it - especially Hidan
he does one coat and one coat only, to save up, luckily the stuff they all use is quite opaque
he's good at not getting any polish on his fingers, again, cause he wants the bottle to last as long as possible
he doesn't need his hands to turn pages while he reads, he can use his tendrils for that, so he does his nails before reading time and lets them dry
he's grateful for the dark brown, the only thing that would be worse than being partnered with Hidan would have been ending up with one of the bright colors that other Akatsuki members got
Hidan: "So there's something worse than being partnered with me?~ <3" to which Kakuzu glares
Kakuzu won't use nail polish remover cause that costs extra, he waits for that one coat to chip to the point that there's only a little bit left in the middle, and paints a new coat on top of that, and ends up with a number of bumpy layers
he's just efficient at it, it doesn't really look all that great from up close
Hidan
he absolutely sucks at painting his nails. absolutely sucks
no patience, no focus, he'll do one nail and then he'll go "Hey Kakuzu!!" cause he's already done a whole entire nail and he's bored
Kakuzu is still trying to think of some kind of way to get Hidan to associate nail polish with Jashin-sama, but no luck yet, that dark green shade is to blame, why didn't they give him red to remind him of blood? white to remind him of bones?
at one point Hidan learns to weaponize his crappy nail painting skills and make Kakuzu do his nails for him
but not by complimenting him on how much better he is, Hidan already knows that flattery won't get him anywhere - instead he "accidentally" knocks over the bottle and lets it spill, and after a very unpleasant lecture about wasting the product, Kakuzu accepts the reality that it won't get done without him
and the perfect time for that is when Hidan is lying down in his prayer circle
Hidan doesn't really start praying until Kakuzu is done painting his nails though, he likes to watch Kakuzu focus on him so intensely, just like when he stitches him up, and most importantly, he loves knowing that Kakuzu would never ever do this for anyone else <3
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