*Kisame gently bathing an injured Itachi*
Kisame, speaking quietly: So many scars you have. Your skin certainly tells an interesting tale.
Itachi, head hung down, half asleep: A tale of abject failure, maybe.
Kisame: *sighs* You’re certainly in a mood this evening, aren’t you? Lift your arms, please.
Itachi: *does as asked and groans* God … I feel so sore. And this headache just refuses to leave.
Kisame: Perhaps this’ll encourage you to actually listen to me when I try to warn you about overusing those eyes of yours …
Itachi: I know, I know …
Kisame: I know you know, but my point is that you don’t listen. Every battle, every encounter we have, you lean on that sharingan until you’re at the brink of exhaustion. When is it going to be enough, Itachi? We CAN train in other means of combat, you know? I’ve seen your Taijutsu before, it’s pretty fiercesome, so why —
Itachi: You worry too much, you know that? *scoots over and playfully swirls his fingers around in the water* Why don’t you climb on in here with me, and I’ll show you some of my other skills ~
Kisame: *gives Itachi a wry smile and shakes his head* Nice try, brat, but it’s not working. *holds out Itachi’s robe for him* Come on, you’ve been in there long enough. Let’s get you into bed and a hot cup of tea in your hands.
Itachi: *steps out of the tub and into the waiting robe* When you say “bed”, do you mean —
Kisame: Yes; my bed. I prefer you there, anyway. Easier to keep an eye on you.
Itachi, indignantly: Oi, you’re acting like I’m some child that can’t be trusted. Worse than that, you’re giving me the same treatment that Sasori-san gives Deidara, or Kakuzu-san gives Hidan! Don’t lump me in with those immature brats! I’m not —
*from down the hall*
Deidara: Danaaa! You’re being a jerk, hm!
Sasori: If me being a “jerk” means preventing you from jumping off the roof to “prove that death is a social construct”, then I guess I’ll just keep on being a jerk.
*from the opposite end of the hall*
Hidan: ‘Kuzuuuu! You never let me have any fun, you bastard!
Kakuzu: Fun? For the love of that fake god of yours, how is wrestling a just-out-of hibernation bear FUN?! I KNOW your stupid ass can’t die but can you think of me for once, eh? Can you think of the guy whose gonna have to sew your ridiculous body back together??
Itachi, to Kisame: See?! I may overuse my eyes but at least I’m not actively doing crazy things like those two! I —
*Tobi walks up*
Tobi: Itachi-senpai! Are we still having our dango eating contest tonight? Tobi is positive that he’ll beat your record of 142 dango in one hour!
Kisame:
Itachi: … Okay, even half-blind I can still see that smug look on your face, Kisa.
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