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fartlovingblkguy69 · 8 months

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Aromatherapy (Continuing a Story from Nifty.org)

A link to the story I'm continuing: https://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/urination/aromatherapy

Part 1

I waited 10 minutes before leaving. I was shaking with anticipation. i had never been so excited in my whole life. He was already pulled around waiting in a 2018 GMC Sierra Crew Cab. "Get in. This isn't a free ride by the way. You can either give me gas money or get down there and sniff my gas. It's a 30 minute drive, maybe longer since it's about to be rush hour. Your choice". There wasn't even a question. I quickly climbed in the passenger side and laid down while he rose up and lowered his basketball shorts. He was wearing stained gray boxer briefs with a wet stain on the back and a big golden brown streak going up the crack. They smelled like a sweaty toilet seat. He quickly sat down and ground his fat ass around my face until my nose was right in the middle of his crack. He reached back, spreading his cheeks and pressing down until my nose was pushing the dirty undies into his hole and his ass enveloped my face. "Ah, that's it. Your nose feels great in my nasty hole. I'm still sweaty from that sauna and I just took the most massive shit so your nose is going to have to scratch that itch." He ground his ass on my face some more as we pulled out of the parking lot. We stopped at every red light on the way to the highway. It took 45 minutes to get to his place. I could smell the fresh shit around his hairy hole and he kept letting out the worst SBDs the whole way laughing each time and rubbing it in on my nose. Finally we got there and he pulled up his shorts and got out. I sat up and made my way out as well. The house was huge and there were 3 other vehicles in the driveway, 2 SUVs and another pickup. We made our way inside and he took me straight to the living room. "I'm hungry so I'm going to make myself something to eat. Get down on the floor with your head in that seat over there and I'll be back" pointing to the comfy chair in the corner. I quickly obeyed and was waiting quietly in the dark when suddenly this handsome young man walked in texting on his iPhone Xr. He had on only a jockstrap that was bulging. He looked to be about 25 maybe and he had a perfect amount of muscle, nice arms, legs, firm pecs, with a little bit of a chiseled but bloated belly and a nice happy trail. He launched himself ass first into the chair I had my face waiting in and oh boy was it a nice one. Nice smooth golden cheeks with a very hairy crack that smelled like a long day with several unshowered before it. Once he had sat down he quickly realized there was something under him but instead of getting up he just farted loudly and wetly. PRRRBBBBBBTTTTTT. "Ah. That felt good. I don't smell a thing. Pops must have gotten a new fart cushion. Awesome! Especially after all those burritos had for lunch. The cheese and beans is really fucking my stomach up." He sat on my face for 10 minutes letting let out several sbds and loud wet releases while rubbing his sexy belly and really ground his wet hole into my face before spreading his cheeks to let out a huge shart. SSSSSSRRRRRRRHHHHHHHHTTTTTTTT. My nose was sprayed with hot air and speckles of shit "Whew that was nasty. Think I felt a little shit come out on that one. Pops will have a fit if I stained his favorite chair! He might even make me his fart cushion again! Definitely don't need that torture!" He shot up and turned around bending down to make sure he hadn't made a mess of the seat. While he did I got to see more of his handsome face. He had a perfect chiseled jaw, beautiful mischievous eyes, and a thin, long nose (think Daniel Croix with green eyes). I licked my lips as he finally got to inspecting me. "Nice. It all went on you huh, cutie? Well plenty more where that came from" He said with a chuckle. He let out a bubbling fart into the air and sniffed. "Damn that's ripe. Why don't you open that pretty mouth for me this time just to be safe. I'll try not to take a dump in it". I shuddered at the thought as I'm not into that at all. He kindly wiped my face off looking down at me with a glint in his eye. I did as he said as he turned around and spread that perfect ass open.

#male farts #hairy male #im lactose intolerant #gay shit #human toilet

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iwas-tooru · 11 months

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how i think the kny demons let it rip

AKAZA

refuses to fart in a public space, the thought is absolutely mortifying to him

excuses himself politely and goes into a little corner to do it

occasionally when he can't hold it in he lets it out and blames the smell on Douma

DOUMA

accidentally farts when he's laughing too hard but isn't necessarily ashamed of it

it's very unexpected like one second he's wheezing hard and the next you hear a loud one rip

it surprises him too but he just goes "ah, excuse me ✋🏻✋🏻" and just goes right back to saying whatever he was saying

doesn't really stink, unless he's freshly back from munching on women at his shrine lol

KOKUSHIBO

he doesn't feel the need to hold it in if he senses a discreet one coming on but Kokushibo is like really bad at reading his own farts lol

he suspects a silent one bubbling up in his stomach and just decides to let it out at the upper moon summon while he's sitting like 🧎🏻‍♂️ as usual but turns out he misjudged it and it actually comes out loud as fuck scaring everyone in the vicinity

he knows nobody will dare say anything about it cause he's upper moon one and tbh he doesn't really give a shit, he just goes:

👁 👁

👁 _ 👁 "excuse me."

👁 👁

GYOKKO

like those watery ones that sound like someone blowing into a glass of soda with a straw

this mf sharts, i just know he does

does it at the worst moments too like Muzan be talking about how worthless and useless the upper moons are and he's trying his hardest to hold it in but it just comes out right in between Muzan's speech

turns very red and embarrassed

doesn't stink in the air but woe betide if you catch a whiff of his behind

HANTENGU CLONES:

HANTENGU

he has those really high pitched squeaky musical note ones that stink like a septic tank

it happens when he's really scared or anxious and just sinks into the floor when they escape

they come out anywhere and everywhere lol Douma snorts everytime it happens and damn near bites his own tongue

SEKIDO

one loud angry fart that just goes 'BLARP'

mostly happens when he can't hold it in anymore and even tho he's embarrassed as hell he'll be looking at you as if daring you to comment on it like "tf you lookin' at huh 🤬"

KARAKU

this mf farts in the blanket and traps Sekido inside, shoving his head in and holding it in a death grip till he's choking and sputtering

he also lifts his leg to do it onto Sekido sometimes just to annoy him

gets his ass beat each time but to him it's worth it lol

UROGI

man has no shame whatsoever will do it anywhere and everywhere and he has those little continuous ones that rumble and stink like hell

sometimes he lets out a long string of trumpet ones. he mostly likes doing it while he's flying cause he feels free and finds it funny that people could be going on with their lives as usual and suddenly they look up to see an overgrown chicken zooming across the sky while letting out a long engine-like backfiring with each toot varying in pitch and tone

AIZETSU

has those silent and deadly ones when he gets overtly anxious or sad

it's bad enough to make the other three gag and cough and he just turns red and starts stuttering out apologies

will probably never look you in the eye again

ZOHAKUTEN

look i don't' know how to describe it but it's as if he's been holding it in for fucking centuries????

like he's deadass gonna stand there with his arms crossed and his face all (ㆆ_ㆆ) while he lets it rip and oh lord it's going to be one of those that just keeps on going and going and going

worst part is he'll probably stare you right in the eye while doing it and woe betide you if you dare laugh at him

the pitch increases as the fart begins dying out

ig thats what happens when you remain fused inside hantengu's body for too long......

DAKI

dainty toots, always excuses herself to go into a corner

lowkey terrified of doing it in public so she always runs off into a restroom when she feels the slightest bit of churning in her tummy

forces them out sometimes while she's alone so that they don't come out in public and those ones are real loud and stink terribly lol

GYUTARO

is neutral about it i think

he feels its a regular bodily function so he ain't necessarily ashamed of it

in short he doesn't really give a shit and doesn't even excuse himself when he lets one out lol

they're usually pretty plain and straightforward smell like the normal level of stink

only excuses himself if he does it in front of Daki

KAIGAKU

this mf squats lol

has those loud ass ones that start out low and rumbly and go higher and higher by the second and finally end when they've reached the maximum pitch

he doesn't give a shit and just sniggers at whoever is on the receiving end of this monstrosity

stinks like hell, he really needs to fix his diet

ENMU

he has those little tiny toots that come out unexpectedly and randomly like he could be walking and suddenly you'd hear a little squeak come out from behind him

has definitely accidentally done it in front of Muzan lol the memory still haunts him

turns scarlet and begins stammering apologies

goes into a corner and has a mental breakdown soon after

RUI

he has those loud, rumbling ones that you let out when you're really stressed/angry if you get what i mean??

has no shame in it fr, and besides everyone in his 'family' is too scared to say anything to him lol so he gets away with it pretty easy

NAKIME

now don't come for me but i feel like she lets out silent stinky ones and blames them on someone else (mostly Douma)

like she's chilling with her biwa and feels a lil rumble in her tummy so she just lets it out silently and keeps quiet abt it until someone goes "ewww what's that smell" and she deadass says with a straight face "it appears Lord Douma has had a good meal today"

LIKE JUST STRAIGHT UP BLAMES IT ON HIM AND THEN WATCHES THE CHAOS UNFOLD AS DOUMA DENIES IT AND PINS IT ON AKAZA AND THEY END UP FIGHTING WHILE SHE'S JUST CHILLING TRYING TO FIGHT BACK A SMIRK LMFAO-

MUZAN

he doesn't fart.

he just doesn't.

no criticism shall be taken.

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brighteyedbushybrowed · 1 year

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𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲 𝐄𝐲𝐞𝐬

Inspired by this video and TikTok audio. I just wanted to get out my headcanons about what would happen if you tried that on the ghouls, Copia, and definitely totally a sibling of sin Mary Goore. I will do a separate one for the ghoulettes too, I promise! Also this isn't proofread because we die like men (also I bashed all this out straight onto tumblr rather than in a word document like I usually do oops)

There's no smut in this, but it is suggestive so minors please DNI or I'm going to pull a Copia and shart in your car.

The two of you had been flirting for two or so months now, the tension between you both growing gradually as time went on. In the greatest of wisdom one could only be bestowed in the early hours of the morning, you decided that you had enough of the silly games. You both wanted each other and you knew you had feelings for them but you also were aware of the fact that they were enjoying this back and forth too much to end it any time soon. So, you were going to take matters into your own hands.

The next day, you sought them out at the place you knew you could usually find them. They raised their hand in greeting when they saw you, but you gave them no chance to say anything as you pushed them up against the nearest surface and pinned them their, a thigh between their legs and one of your hands grasping their chin to make eye contact.

"That's it," you hummed with a smile as you pressed in closer to them. "Yes, this is perfect. You just keep looking at me with those pretty eyes. Don't take your eyes off of me."

𝐒𝐨𝐝𝐨

While you weren't unwelcome in the underground dens, Sodo hadn't expected to see you today. Not that he was complaining, of course. Seeing you and getting to enjoy the thrill of your back and forth flirting was his favourite part of the day, but this? Being pushed up against the kitchen counter as you commanded his attention made a flush of heat run through him at the thoughts of what else he'd like you to do to him in here. Anyone could walk in at any moment, and that just made the moment all the more delicious.

The fire ghoul's tail wrapped around your leg as his clawed hands settled on your hips. "Only if you keep looking at me like that, sugar. You might even get a kiss out of me if you lean in just a little bit closer."

He thought he got you at first, the cogs turning in your head practically visible on your face. He couldn't help but inhale your intoxicating scent - a mix of your shampoo and excitement - when you began to close the gap. Just as he was about to press his lips against yours, you moved to speak into his ear.

"Why don't we take this somewhere a little more... private? If you're down for that."

Sodo grinned as he lifted you and began to carry you towards his room, your legs wrapped around his hips and the two of you barely making it in before he attacked your lips and locked the door behind you both.

𝐀𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫

To say Aether was shocked would be an understatement. He gazed into your eyes just as you commanded, your words repeating in his head as he tried to process what was going on. It wasn't that he thought you were shy or anything like that - quite the opposite in fact. It had just never crossed his mind that you could be so forward.

It also hadn't crossed his mind how hot he'd find it.

You let out a quiet gasp when one of his hands reached round to rest on your ass, his thumb caressing back and forth as he pushed you into him. Your noses touched as neither one of you dared to look away. The quintessence ghoul felt the shift in your mood from confident and mischievous to aroused and he purred.

"What's brought this on, angel? Hm?" he asked, his voice low as his warm breath fanned against your lower face.

"Huh?" You blinked at him and he chuckled.

"What? Lost for words? Where's all that boldness from a moment ago gone? It suits you."

He relished the smirk that appeared, already hoping he'd get to see more of that more dominant side of you.

"Maybe if you weren't feeling me up and looking at me like you're about to bend me over a table I'd be able to think straight," you replied.

He quirked an eyebrow at you. "Maybe I don't want you to think about anything other than me. How does that sound?"

Your tongue brushed against his lower lip and he shuddered. "I think that sounds perfect."

As you pulled him towards his room, he couldn't help but mentally curse at how tightly you unknowingly had him wrapped around your little finger.

𝐑𝐚𝐢𝐧

The first thought that round through Rain's head the moment you pinned him against the tree by the lakeside was oh. While he may have come out of his shell more over the past few years, he was still one of the more reserved ghouls at the ministry. He hadn't considered that he'd ever be in this position with you, worried that your flirting was just you being nice to him, so now he was ill-prepared for how to react if you pushed him up against something and made your interest in him so clear.

"What's wrong, Rainy?" you asked, tone lightly teasing. "Cat got your tongue?"

The water ghoul ran one of his hands through his hair as he exhaled, trying to calm down and not appear as flustered as he felt. "I wanna kiss you."

Immediately, Rain's eyes widened and he hid his face behind his hands. That was not what he'd meant to say. Now you were going to laugh at him and look at him funny and think he was weird. Great! Maybe if he wished really hard, Mountain would make a hole appear beneath him and he would vanish forever so he wouldn't have to live down the embarrassment.

"Hey, there's nothing to be ashamed of! Please don't hide from me," you cooed, trying to gently pull his hands away so you could look at him.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to say that. I mean, I did mean what I said. I just -"

"No need to apologise, Rainy. Please let me see you. I'm not going to laugh or think you're creepy or anything like that, I promise."

After a moment to collect himself, the ghoul dropped his hands. They were immediately replaced by yours as you placed a gentle kiss on his lips, making him blush.

"That wasn't so bad, was it? Come on, let's go sit down by the lake and we can talk."

Relieved, Rain nodded and allowed you to pull him over to the lakeside.

𝐌𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧

"You think my eyes are pretty?" Mountain asked, completely unfazed by the fact that you'd managed to pin him against the wall of the practice room. No, instead it was your words that struck him more. He was used to hearing other siblings of sin talk about how much they loved the colourful glowing eyes of the other ghouls. He was happy to be the only ghoul with eyes that didn't glow, but he sometimes felt that his eyes weren't as attractive or interesting to them because of this.

You couldn't help but laugh in surprise. "I... Mountain, I literally just pushed you up against a wall and laid it on as thick as I could and you're focused on the part about your eyes?"

When you said it out loud, he had to chuckle. "I suppose when you put it like that..."

As he trailed off, he reached up to cup the side of your face with one hand while the other rested on your shoulder. Just as you asked, he didn't take his eyes off yours for a moment. He took in every fleck of colour in your irises, every eyelash, every detail he could.

"Nobody has ever told me they think my eyes are pretty before. You're the first."

You grinned in response. "Your eyes are the prettiest out of all of them. They're so different to the others. Don't get me wrong, their eyes are interesting, but there's only so much glowing orbs in the middle of the night I can handle, you know? Your eyes are calming. They feel like home."

The earth ghoul felt himself blush. He'd admittedly never thought of that before. As an earth ghoul, his eyes didn't glow because of how accustomed he was to hunting outside and trying to blend in so he wouldn't chase away his prey. He assumed that you would find his eyes to be boring because of that.

You snapped him out of his thoughts when you turned your head to kiss the palm of his hand, finally breaking eye contact.

"Why don't we go head back to the dens? And I'll tell you all about everything else I find pretty about you."

With a hum and a kiss to your forehead, Mountain led the way, a fluttering in his stomach as you intertwined your fingers with his.

𝐒𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐬

Heart thudding, Swiss forced himself not to just spill all the filthy words he wanted to say to you. He was used to being the more dominant one in relationships, always taking control and being the one to make others flustered with just a few words. Now, however, he found that he enjoyed the control being taken away form him a lot more than he originally believed. So much so, that he had to shift his position a little so that his erection wouldn't be so obvious to people walking past you both in the corridor.

"Mm, someone's feeling obedient today," you commented, smirking as you noticed him changing the way he was stood up against the wall.

"Hey, I'm always good and obedient! Just ask Papa," the multi-ghoul replied, feigning offence.

You leaned in ever so slightly, reveling in the way his breath hitched for a moment. "That's not what I've heard."

"Oh yeah? And what's that then?"

Swiss' eyes rolled into the back of his head when your lips brushed against his ear. He could smell how much you enjoyed taking charge, picking up on your feeling of satisfaction and the rush it gave you. He may not have as strong a sway over emotions as Aether did, but he could still feel everything you were feeling when you were pressed up against him like that.

"Rumour has it that Swiss likes to be a brat for Papa and doesn't like being told what to do. Is that true?"

Fuck, the way you teased him had his head swimming. "Shit, maybe. Would that be so bad?"

Relief washed through the ghoul when you leaned back, though he felt a knot form in his stomach when your thumb tugged on his bottom lip.

"Why don't you take me back to your room and I'll show you how much I hate brats that don't know their place."

He didn't know if you were just saying that because you'd figured out that he liked being treated like a naughty brat, but he certainly wasn't going to waist time complaining.

𝐂𝐨𝐩𝐢𝐚

The best way to describe Copia in that moment was a beautiful, stuttering, breathless mess. Still in his Papal robes and his smudged paint from the night before, his hands gripped onto the shelves of the bookcase behind him. He hadn't expected you to come seek him out in the library, especially not before morning mass, and he was feeling conflicted about how to react. Depending on his reaction, he could end up ruining whatever the two of you had or take things past the point of return and he wasn't sure which would be better or worse.

"You're overthinking again," you stated, taking in the way his chest rose and fell with shallow breaths.

"I am not," he retorted, trying and failing to sound casual about it.

You sighed. "That wasn't very consisting, Copia. Would you like to try that again?"

The way you said his name made him want to fall to his knees before you. How did you make it sound so good coming from your lips? He hated it when other people called him that while playing the role of Papa, yet when you did it it sounded so right. So sinful.

Fuck, he was in deep shit here.

Copia's voice wavered. "Why do you have to make me feel like this, eh? What black magic is this?"

"If I'm making you uncomfortable we can drop it and pretend this didn't happen," you said, letting go of his chin and starting to back away.

You gasped when he grabbed hold of your hips, moving you back into position. "Oh no, you don't get to run away after that display. I am not uncomfortable, just... unsure."

"Ah. Because you're Papa, and I'm in a position beneath you."

"Satanas, the way you say these things! I just worry about ruining what we have by making the wrong move. That's all."

You didn't need his face to be bare to tell he was blushing, the tips of his ears reddening. Smiling, you rested your hands on his chest and kissed him, not caring if his paint transferred to your lips.

"Why don't we just take it a day at a time and figure this out together? It doesn't have to be anything more or less than what we want it to be."

Copia couldn't help but feel reassured at your words, nodding in agreement and basking in the way you beamed back at him.

𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐆𝐨𝐨𝐫𝐞

"Shit, babe, you know how to make a dead guy's blood start pumping again," he joked, hands resting firmly on your hips to stop you moving away. His little hiding spot inside the booth after confession had become a place for the two of you to hang out as of late, but the two of you had never been so close in proximity with this much sexual tension before.

He wouldn't have been opposed to having a little fumble in here.

You scoffed. "You're not dead yet, Mare. As much as you like to say vampires are dead, the fact I hear your heartbeat every time you fall asleep in my room says otherwise."

He rolled his eyes. "One day you'll actually play along with me. I thought people ate up that Twilight sparkly dead vampire shit."

"Oh yeah, because everyone wants to Creep-o Cullen with his weird habit of breaking into a seventeen year-old girl's room to stare at her while she sleeps. No thank you."

Mary laughed at that, his thumbs rubbing back and forth over your clothed waist. "Don't think that I don't know you watch me when I drift off in your room. You're just as bad as him."

He watched you bite your lip and wanted nothing more than to do that himself. Maybe even draw some blood if he bit hard enough. He didn't know if you'd be into that, but if you were into him and all his weird eccentricities then he was willing to bet you'd enjoy it just as much as he did.

"You know," you teased, "vaguely insulting me isn't the way to get into my pants. Or anyone's pants for that matter. Well, maybe Swiss' or Sodo's. They both seem like they'd like the arguing and degradation."

Mary hummed, dragging you closer so that your chest was pressed against his. "What about compliments and praise then? You've been such a good sibling of sin, haven't you? So good I could drag you away somewhere and have my way with you. Would you like that?"

Silence filled the confession booth for a moment before you burst into laughter, making him pout in irritation.

"Wow. Okay, Mare. First of all, thanks for the praise because that is actually kinda hot. But was that really the best compliment you could come up with? 'You're so good that I want to fuck you'?"

He tutted, tilting his head back to hit the wood. "Shut up. It's not my fault I can practically smell how horny you are."

You smacked his chest with a giggle. "Like your dick isn't pressing against my thigh right now, hypocrite."

Mary smiled, ducking his head to suck your bottom lip into his mouth and graze his teeth against it.

"Maybe I'm a hypocrite, but you love it all the same."

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antennaed-shidou · 9 months

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Small Chances

♫ Mikage Reo x f! reader

♫ Warning: not prof-read

♫ Extras: Word count 1k+

♫ In which you misunderstand Reo actions, and he understands yours

She sat in her parking lot waiting for her date to pick her up. Time passed and {Y/n} was still sitting in her parking lot. She looked at her phone seeing the time 19:43 and there was no sign of Reo showing up.

She took a deep sigh heading inside giving up on Reo. She plugged her phone in deciding not to text Reo why he didn't show up. She thought if she did she was be more disappointed than already.

{Y/n} lays down on her bed facing the ceiling watching the fan rotate around. Salty tears filled her eyes as they slowly fell down her cheeks.

{Y/n} was so excited when Reo told her he would take her out on a little date. But when he never showed up, her heart just sharted like a piece of glass being shot.

Soon she was able to fall asleep letting all the thoughts slowly leave her mind about Reo.

The following morning when she woke up her eyes were a little puffy. {Y/n} placed some ice around her eyes to help with the puffiness. The female walked to the kitchen to get some breakfast.

While she was eating {Y/n} debated on whether to go to school and there was a high chance of seeing Reo and getting embarrassed. And obviously, if she didn't then there would be no embarrassment. Which she would do.

She also didn't want to ruin her perfect streak of showing up every day because of a guy that would obviously shoot her down. After she was done eating breakfast she got her things and was ready to head off to school whether she may cry or not!

At first, the day went on normally, {Y/n} talked with her friends her classes went on smoothly. But around lunch is when things started to go downhill.

"How was your date with Reo?" One of her friends asked while posting silverware to the female she was talking to.

{Y/n} took a deep gulp not sure how to answer. Her friends were protective of her and always wanted what was best, and what would happen if they found out about the most popular guy and the school stood her up?

"It was ok," {Y/n} answers smiling guiltily hoping no one would notice she was living straight through her teeth.

"You're lying aren't you?" The friend asked sigh seeing straight through the words.

The [h/c]-haired sheepish smiled rubbing the nape of her neck. "Maybe he didn't show up and I sat on my parking lot for about two to three hours last night."

The friend sigh as she got up from the table, "Well then... wonder if the popular guy has ever had a fist cross his face."

{Y/n} quickly jumped out of her chair going to stop her friend, "It's not that serious. I mean in all honesty I should have known Reo wasn't going to show up in the first place. I mean look at me..." She motioned to herself knowing no one would ever go out with her.

"Then look at him..." She motioned over to Reo who looks where beyond compare. "He's just too popular and handsome for me."

{Y/n} felt her hand move and it wasn't her own doing. When she looked over to see who had done it the most popular purple-haired male was standing right beside her.

The friend took {Y/n} back as she stood before Reo. "So you stood up my friend on a date, huh. The most popular couldn't do a smile task such as telling the female you hated her."

Meanwhile, Reo stood there dumbfounded at what the girl was saying. He looked over her shoulder to see {Y/n}, he saw a small tear roll down the side of her face. Reo tried to talk to the [h/c]-haired female but the friend left to no avail.

"She doesn't want to talk to you buddy. Go away and talk to one of those other girlfriends you have."

"Please, just go away Reo." {Y/n} muttered facing the other way covering her face that he assumed would have dried up tears.

Though he did listen and walked away from the table sitting back on his own. If only the friend wasn't there then the male could say what he really wanted to say.

Reo knows where you were coming from, he didn't show up last night at all and that was indeed his fault and what made it worse was he couldn't explain himself further.

The rest of the day he tried to take to {Y/n} but he couldn't find the right time. He definitely didn't want to text it to her because that would make things worse than need be.

Reo was pacing back and forth in his room deciding whether to show up and her house and tell her what was going on or decide to meet with him somewhere.

...

{Y/n} heard loud honking outside. She opens her curtain and was met with Reo who was holding a Bouquet of flowers. She rushes downstairs putting on some nicer clothes and shoes before meeting again face to face with Reo.

"Why are you here, Reo? Aren't you supposed to be with another girl? I mean I completely understand, I'm not pretty at all, and not any of the other guys want me so there is no need to feel bad if you deny me too. It's happened many more times than you can think." As she was rambling on Reo stopped her from sprouting any more nonsense.

"No, you've got it all wrong. I love you, {Y/n}. Actually, I've liked you ever since I first laid eyes on you. Your smile that lights up even the darkest of nights, your eyes so delicate I can see your soul. Even your soul, so delicate from being broken so many times by guys that never deserve to even look in your direction. Most important your sweet and caring personality that moves people to strive and do better. I don't just like you, {Y/n}. I love and adore you, {Y/n}."

While he was talking tears start to fill the female's eye. Once Reo was finished with his speech the female took the bouquet from his hands and grabbed him for a hug.

"Then why did you not show up yesterday?" She asks breaking away.

"I was so excited for the date that I lost track of time setting up everything, by the time I was finished it was already the next day and when I showed up to your house, you were no longer there." He bawled his fist hoping she would believe him, he wasn't telling a lie but his statement could be a little hard to believe. "I didn't text you either because I didn't want to disrupt your sleep.

A small smile cracked on her lips. She put the flowers aside and gave Reo a kiss on the cheek, "All in forgiven. Now please can we go on the proper date."

He wraps his arms around her walking her to the vehicle, "I would be deleted to take you. I know you'll love it."

I wrote this late, or finish it late. I was on a roll baby my fingers were on fire. (reblogs are welcome! Request are open)

#anyway this is longer #but was fun to write non the less #mk. stories #mk. oneshots #mk. reo #blue lock manga #bllk #fanfic #blue lock #reo mikage #blue lock x reader #blue lock reo #reo x y/n #mikage reo x reader #mikage reo #have a cookie 🍪

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pokechampash · 1 year

Text

Kagami's and Aomine's Explosive Rivalry

“Yay we did it guys! Good job!” Teppei cheered as he gave his team a nice long group hug, the Seirin high school basketball team had been challenged by a rival school and easily won with a score of 25-10, but while everyone was celebrating it seemed one of the team’s aces Taiga Kagami wasn't feeling to well.

“Ugh, I shouldn't have eaten all those damn burgers before this match!” Kagami thought to himself as he held his growling stomach letting out a juicy fart, he quickly made his way off the the nearest toilets he could find, what he didn't know was that a certain someone had been watching him and figured out his messy situation.

“God this is the last time I eat that much before a match” Kagami groaned as he entered the bathroom, but to his horror all three of the stalls we're locked and occupied.

“Hey, are any of you nearly done? Having an emergency here!” Kagami said, bouncing up and down.

“Nope sorry dude you'll just have to wait your turn hehe” said a mocking voice from the middle stall, Kagami instantly recognized the voice as Aomine Daiki, one of the members of the generation of miracles and Kagami’s number one rival. Aiming had seen Kagami earlier and decided to pull a prank on him thinking he was just being dramatic when complaining about how badly he needed to shit.

“Aomine dude this is not the time for one of your stupid pranks! I really gotta hit the can! Open up!” Kagami moaned as he let out a booming wet fart, the fart was so powerful it left skid marks on his boxers!

“Ooh that sounded wet bro, I wanna see how long you can hold it for hehe” Aomine teased Kagami from inside the stall.

Kagami started banging on the stall in hopes of breaking the door down but with no luck. Kagami slowly started to shit himself as he let out a shart that left a stain on his basketball shorts, Kagami moaned as he felt a mix of agony and relief as shit slowly slid down your leg, Aomine heard everything and was utterly shocked.

“C'mon man I'm shitting myself out here!” Kagami complained as he held his lightly shit coated ass.

“Holy shit you're actually shit yourself bro? I just thought you were being dramatic” Aomine said as he opened the stall door and stared at Kagami and the mess he was making in disbelief.

“Just get out of the way bro!” Kagami growled with a pissed expression on his face as he shoved Aomine out of his way and burst into the stall, pushed his black boxer and basketball shorts to his ankles, and unleashed a loud and smelly wave of shit with a huge moan of relief.

“Jeez, guess you really had to go huh?” Aomine teased Kagami from outside the stall, even though his prank was already successful he felt the need to pick on Kagami, they are rivals after all.

“Damn right I did, the floor would have turned brown if you didn't open the door asswipe” Kagami said through grunts and plops, when he finally finished his monster dump he was annoyed to find the toilet paper roll empty.

“Yo, do me a favor and get me some TP will ya?” Kagami shouted to Aomine.

“Alright, might have to get you two rolls because that shit sounded hella sloppy hehe” Aomine teased as he grabbed some toilet paper from another stall and gave it to Kagami, he accidentally caught a glimpse of Kagami’s shit covered boxers and basketball shorts.

“Damn no way you can go back out there with those, your lucky I always have a spare pair of boxers and shorts for shitty situations like these” Aomine commented, Kagami simply responded with a small fart.

After Kagami finished wiping his ass clean Aomine gave him the spare change of clothes he mentioned and the two rivals ended up deciding to head out for the day since both of their matches were over for the day, and since that day every time they crossed paths Aomine likes to tease Kagami about his little incident.

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rayinberkeley · 1 year

Text

There’s Simply Nothing Creepier than “Pro-Life” Bitches

Hi, Zelda Gargamel, you little rancid twat fuck, I’m the guy you called creepy. How ya doing? Like I give a fuck. Anyway, as I’m in 7 days Twitter jail because of your mass reporting, like that’s any skin off my back, I figured, since you all said I was "obsessed" with you or something, I thought I'd bring some motherfucking receipts.

You've a nice act on here and all, or a "brand" as the morons say. You harass people and then pretend they're harassing you when they snap back at your harassment. This oh so clever question you kept asking showed up on my feed at least 30 times:

I mean over and over and over... till I got sick of it and chimed in. In which case your mob hopped on and all sorts of homophobia followed.

You see, we all know what your oh so clever as shart question really stemmed from. A notion that women just have abortions willy nilly. In case you don't know, THAT is misogyny. And you are the fucking misogynist.

It's sick reasoning that your base premise relies on somehow a woman's health having to pass some test of debate with you. It is not Pepsi vs. Coke, Tastes Great vs. Less Filling. It's a woman's healthcare, and fuck you for acting like she must pass your test.

Which your mob thinks is me just being "clever". It is not. It's fact. It'll never be your damn business. And more misogyny... oh dear.

So then you ducked behind this adorable little act of yours. That I'm giving two shits about your sex life, when in fact, I'm answering YOUR harassment with the insult it deserved. If you were, you'd be out of other women's business.

You wanna talk about what's actually fucking creepy? It's YOU sticking your damn nose into the business of women at the moment of the hardest choice they have to make. Nobody is obligated to answer to YOU for their abortion choices.

And nobody is obligated to answer your question that YOU think is clever. But you want an answer to your question? Fine, here's some other ways babies are made.

A woman who WANTS children but ends up in a fallopian pregnancy. That fertilized egg will never be a human, but she will die. Ya'll anti-choicers think it's "a baby" and it's "God's will she just die."

Source: CBS

Ya'll anti-choicers even want to force her to have a fucking funeral for it. THAT'S FUCKING CREEPY.

Source:

Self

Here's another way babies are made. Since sex education is out, boy pressures girl, girl gives it up, girl doesn't know that's how she's preggars. Baby will ruin her life. But who cares, right?

National Library of Medicine: Abstinence-Only Education and Teen Pregnancy Rates: Why We Need Comprehensive Sex Education in the U.S

Another way babies can be made: boy meets girl, they fall in love, get pregnant, then find out they have the same estranged father. This has actually happened. Mostly likely you'd know, since you look like the product of it.

After 30 Years of Marriage, Couple Discover They Have the Same Father...

Another way babies are made? Drunken sex, consentual but careless from poor judgment, and is simply not ready for a baby. It isn't rape, but it also is still not your business.

There are all kinds of scenarios. These are off the top of my head, and there are endless scenarios I can't know because I don't pretend to be an expert, which is why I DON'T, unlike you, rule a judging finger over abortion rights.

After all, to save those clumps of cells ya'll wanna track little girls' menstrual cycles, but I'm the one who's creepy, huh? (Thankfully that attempt failed)

Source: NBC

And even fucking social media is turning women in for seeking abortion care now. But who's the creepy one? Of course it's me, right? Suuuuuure.

Source:

Business Insider

What really matters is, DON'T YOU KNOW WHO I AM?!?!?! I'M ENGAGED!!!! (No, I don't know who the fuck you are, nor do I care, and ducking behind that shit was pathetic.

"He's sexuwawwy hawassing me!" you yelled, and your little mob of monkeyfucks all fled in to save the poor little victim.

First, being cursed out because you won’t mind your own fucking business ain’t sexual harassment.

But you felt attacked? Good! I'm glad you felt so victimized, because as said in my mission statement earlier, you're part of the mob that harasses innocent women, calling them murderers. I want you to know HALF of what your crusade puts them through.

I mean ya'll are some sick fucks doing this to women you don't even know, but you act like I should know, or care, you're gettin' some disabled chick sex action?

youtube

Hon, I'm disabled. Crippling PTSD and Major Depressive Disorder. I live on SSI. Don't pull that damn card on me. You having your damn mob of people thinking "woe iz me nobody finks disabled girlz get any," girl, I do porn stars.

Think I’m lying? Don’t care what you think. But:

So you’re getting some. Not good enough to get your nose out of other women’s health decisions. And what a stupid fucking deflection.

Your act is stale, but you do have quite the mob of SICK-ophants, I'll grant you that. And such a lovely assortment of MAGA and Nazis and transphobes...

Oh, it kept going...

And going... and this was but a fraction of your delightful friends.....

That shit right there? Not even close to the full amount of your little mob that came at me. I’ve had that shit all my life. You got ONE comment at you that made you fucking cry. I want to apologize to you for what I said.

I’M FUCKING SORRY...... i DIDN’T SAY WORSE. I’m sorry I didn’t say something that would rock your entire existence to its core, that I didn’t manage to make YOU experience depression, suicidal thoughts, terror, the likes of which your fucking little sick Nazi mob makes women feel for having to make a choice, or LGBTQ people for any reason. I want you to know a fraction of the pain your kind brings into the world, you skank ass bitch.

I’m especially in love with your minions that screamed at me that there are only two genders. I see what really gets you off. Stupidity!

But of course, ya’ll have nothing to worry about. Not a one of the idiots on that list "violated Twitter's terms" (even though transphobia very clearly is in the list of things you can report). A fact I've documented quite thoroughly.

Source: My own blog

Oh you think I care I get penalyzed on Elon’s newly acquired Bird App? Ain't even close to the first time, and I regret absolutely none of it.

Source: Still my own blog.

Notice that’s a lost account, where I referenced another lost account? Been at this a while, shit-chick, and social media ALWAYS punishes the person fighting back, never the person harassing them.

And we all know WHY they don't enforce actual standards on Twitter anymore. Big billionaire daddy bought ya'll a Nazi safe space to harass and hate with his exploding murder car money. It only cost him a few billion. Worth it, right?

Source: NDTV

He also lost his daughter. His trans daughter, by the way. He thinks it's due to "Marxism" but it's because she's embarrassed by his disgusting bigotry.

Source:

Mercury News

Any decision from this shitshow site is hardly a football for you fuckers to spike. Gladly be penalized a million times to get in the faces of rancid crotched losers sniffing in other women's business like you.

Because again, you can cry victim all the live long day, but you ain't the one being forced into this shit. You're just the one hurting these women.

RECENT CASES ON VIOLENCE AGAINST REPRODUCTIVE HEALTH CARE PROVIDERS

Which brings me to another of your posse...

Delilah somethingorfuckingother screamed at me to "stay in my lane" (bodily autonomy is very much an LGBTQ issue) and accused me of "White Knighting." Okay, let's talk about that one.

She's right. I totally forgot all about when the German theologist, Martin Niemöller, said:

I notice she isn't telling THESE men to stay in their lane, right?

Sorry, but you gotta know, after all that prying into other women's business in such sick ways... creepy takes on a whooole new level with you motherfuckers. I mean, and then there's THIS fact:

Of COURSE you want everyone to stay in other lanes, so that the women you want to harass will be alone. While you have Twitter as a safe space to harass them. And SCOTUS. And the entire GOP to stay in their crotch.

Source:

Intelligencer

And who's white-knighting here? Ya'll are doing all this because you wanna save a bunch of undeveloped clump of cells, thinking you're some fucking hero.

THAT'S White Knighting.

Source:

Harper’s Bazaar

Just like ya'll "White Knight" saving kids from the horror of "WOKENESS!" but you ain't saving shit. You're just hating on those ya'll already abused, blaming them for your own fucked up shit. Tell ‘em, Shea:

You don't care about life. You care about control. A clump of cells has no agency and can't tell you dumbfucks to STFU and go away, and ya'll want soooo badly to be heroes about something to distract from:

Not to mention the shit ya'll do to trans people. You of course think hating on them is some sort of act of feminism. It is not. Trans women are women. You are not, however, cuz you'd have to be human first.

But you're not. You're adored by MAGA transphobes and love harassing women and assuming if they need an abortion they must just fuck and abort like bunnies. It's what you were implying, which is what started all this, Turnip.

So in conclusion:

You're the harassing person in all this. You're the creepy one as well. Your back up mob of freaks ain't covering you from wrongness any more than your disabled card did.

You can't play a victim while victimizing other women. No abortion decision is ever your business except your own.

And trans men are men, trans women are women, and don't need your permission to be who they are.

These things are not up for debate and we will not be debating them. We don't have to answer any questions you think are clever but are incredibly stupid, no matter how many times you verbally fart them. And we DON'T have to be nice to you.

And threats of reporting and Twitter jail ain't gonna shake me from it either. Elon may have tried to make a safe space for you Nazis, but NAZIS DESERVE NO SAFE SPACE.

Now stay the fuck off my feed because you ain't gonna get anything from me but worse than what I said before, and as you did then, YOU'LL DESERVE IT.

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nishipostitz · 2 years

Text

how haikyuu boys would react seeing you in revealing home clothes(or you in general for the 1st time[in forevaaa])

part 2

tw! little to none. mention of cleavage in kita’s, and curves. mentions of hair that can be put in a ponytail. ab workouts 💪 summer bod goals in hinatas. gn!reader x haikyuu boys. everything i wrote so far has been gn :) uh, basically crack(comedy) and little fluff idk!/&:!/&/

characters, kita, tendou, hinata, bokuto

kita

- boy was shocked 😔

- and so were you

“coming!” you said as you ran downstairs. your headphones and phone in hand bc you were just jamming to music while cleaning the bathroom. you had received a text a few hours earlier about your brother needing your help later bc he just bought a new tv. so of course, you werent expecting mr. kita shinsuke 😑. instead you were expecting rin. now, you were met face to face with kita’s skunk like hair. and he was met with your gloves in hand, headphones on the brink of falling out, and your cleavage hanging low in your top. dont look down. dont look down. you were still oblivious of your apparel. “uh.. hello? im down here you know” gosh. now i have to look down.. “what do you even get for being so tall anyway?” a nice vi-*mental slap* stop it kita. this is very un-gentleman like of you. “uh so why are you here again” you gave him a look. “oh suna called me over to help him bring in a tv” he said trying not to blush. “alright. have your fun kids” you said as you walked away, headphones still hanging loosely on your head. man.. sweats really define their curv- GODH STOP IT KITA. THEYRE YOUR TEAMMATES SIBLING FOR GOD SAKES. you entered the bathroom to continue cleaning and before that, you adjusted your headphones and everything. only now realizing how hoey you looked in front of your little brother’s teammate 😔 huh, so i guess thats why he tried to resist looking down. my, what a gentleman you are.. you were thinking one thing in the bathroom, and kita was sharting his pants downstairs trying to clear his mind. (ik this is not like him at all, but i just had to do it bc it was funny..to me-)

tendou

- his face starts turning the same color as his hair

- you were embarrassed tbh 💁‍♀️

“make yourself at home ig” you say as you tie your hair up. this was ridiculous. how could tendou start blushing at the fact that youre tying your hair in front of him while he’s on the couch. tendou had somehow barged into your house while waiting for your little brother, toshi. you knew nothing much went on in his mind, but apparently, your little brother leaked the info on where the spare keys were hidden. so tendou used that to come inside your home. he wasn’t expecting you to be crawling on the floor. especially with short shorts on. why were you crawling? “aw man it hurts” you cried out loud. you had a food coma. to you, it was a good idea to watch mukbangs while eating leftovers as a mukbang. and your stomach couldn’t handle it. luckily, you were being smart so you wore loose clothes. but you were still dumb for thinking you could eat a lot. so now, youre laying on the couch with tendou. him sitting like a statue at the edge, while youre sprawled out. “why are you sitting so tensely? chill a bit. i dont bite. ‘m not necessarily into that” you say. he blushes even more. “i-im fine thanks- TOSHI!” yelling out, hoping your brother can hurry up. “yk, hes never coming down if youre calling him like that. you gotta go up there and pull his ears” tendou swore he could NEVER do that. especially not with ushijima. but here you were, doing the very thing he said he wouldnt do. and you were a whole 8 inches shorter too. “problem solved” you said as you dusted off your hands.

hinata

- yells… a LOT

- hes gonna start praying bc hes scared he sinned for looking at you for too long thinking it was lust but it was actually just curiosity.. 💀

this was only his second time over to noya’s house. he came here today to attend a study date actually, he was here to learn more libero moves and be cooler. but he just HAD to enter the wrong door when noya told him where the bathroom was cliche ik “SWEET MAMA!” he yelled out. you were honestly shocked too. you were in the middle of doing your secret workouts for abs before summer and some ginger just yelled and popped into your room. you tried to play it off cool. “and who are you 🤨? do i know you? or are you another idiot who decided to hang out with noya?” “HEYY!” hinata was flabbergasted. he thought noya was above average looking, but this human right here who could be related to him was ATTRACTIVE. “how could something like that be related to you?” he asked, pointing at you and noya. “oh we’re not, hes just adopted” you say calmly before trying to proceed with your workout as if you werent embarrassed one bit. due to this kid’s innocence, you could act calmer. “-sorry but where’s the bathroom?” hinata tried to break the awkwardness. “its one door down from my door” you said before waiting for him to leave so you could continue your workout and not end up looking like a sloth for summer. this time, you locked your door. after his awaited potty break, hinata rushed back to noya’s room. “are you really adopted?” “really man. really? my older sister just likes saying that. im not adopted..” “yk, theres always a chance tho..” “huh. youre right. let me check with my parents- MOM!”

bokuto

- great.. he was at your house, and you didnt KNOW.

- he took a shower and you thought it was akaashi..

“AAAAAAH” “AHAAHH” screams emitted frim the bathroom shower stall and door. “WHO ARE YOU? WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY BATHROOM?” “WHO ARE YOU? AND WHY ARE YOU IN MY BEST FRIENDS HOUSE?” “first of all, i help pay rent for this house. so it’s basically mine too. but answer my question first 🤨” bokuto was flabbergasted(2.0). “rent?” you nodded. “so youre the sister akaashi was embarrassed of showing me..” he nodded. you were offended. “jee thanks for telling me skunk head” bokuto’s eyes almost popped out of their sockets. “fyi, its actually the do of the owl. so dont be rude to my hair do” you rolled your eyes. “well, i mean. i think akaashi’s totally wrong. i think youre quite hot” bokuto said. only realizing what he said too late. you were shocked. “-tempered. you started screaming when you saw me 😟” you slapped you forehead. “akaashi’s friend, accept that you called me hot. bc ik i am. and second, you were screaming your lungs out even more than i did” bokuto was speechless. “well wouldnt you be hot though? sweat pants and a sweater..?” you looked over your clothes again. “well ig, idk. but hurry up and get out of the shower so i can use it. but before we do, explain to me why my little brother left an idiot in our house without telling me” in short. lets say bo left your house with a hottie’s number saved in his contacts.

#haikyuu kita #kita fluff #kita shinsuke #bokuto #anime boy #tendou #haikyuu fluff #tendou scenario #tendou x y/n #haikyuu hinata #haikyuu suna #akaashi #haikyuu ushijima #nishinoya yū #haikyuu comedy #crack #haikyuu fanfiction #fanfiction #fanfic

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borrovvedyoongi · 5 years

Text

Off Season

kinda like that one taylor swift song but not really, promise. instead, it involves basketball

jaehyun x reader

have I mentioned I'm a band nerd ;)

word count: 2,405

One of the redeeming qualities about your school was most definitely not the class average attendance or the sports teams lack of winning streaks, but hey, give all the money and glory and attention to them and leave the fine arts kids out of it. Are you pissed? Oh, most certainly.

There's little to no funds for the art class, drama class, choir class, and most certainly not the band. At least it's not like one of those cliche movies where you guys are bullied. It's better, no one pays attention to you. It's honest to God good that no one pays attention to students like you, because the popular kids are always caught up in their own petty shit. The dumbest of all shits. Who sent nudes to who, who started liking pictures of who, who's eating lunch with who, who shaded who on who's Snapchat story. Like, who gives a damn?

You can at least appreciate the pom and cheer squad because it's not like you can dance or do flips like they do, and at least they can win something. The football team on the other hand, is a complete joke. There has not been one single game last year where they've won. Not. A. Single. One. Even after they lose you have to play the fight song. The best part is that you get to play the song really slowly when they get obliterated. Nine points to fifty-four. It's incredibly pitiful.

Even after football season is over, you still have to play pep tunes for your mediocre team: the basketball team. At least they're not as bad as the football team and can come close to winning, and actually do it, sometimes. The girls' basketball team is playing and they're doing pretty well. Ten points ahead of the visitors. It's halftime, you don't know how the hell the game works, but you're having fun. You're singing "Hey Baby" like it's your last (because it is, senior year baby!) and you feel like you're having the time of your life, on this Friday night.

Your friends snuck in some Dr. Pepper into the stands and you have to drink some water first in order to not wreck the insides of your clarinet. You have 15 minutes to yourself, so you head to the water fountain. You make your way out of the gym, and you see Jaehyun and Chittaphon talking to each other in the hall way. You make sure to take a quick peak at Jaehyun in his basketball uniform without being obvious. If the football team's players are a snack, this guy is a whole ass meal.

He's almost six feet tall, has nice, muscular arms, and a lean body. You have history class with him and he sits right next to you, and you have Johnny sitting right in front of you. Jaehyun constantly has his body facing towards Johnny, considering he is his only friend in history. It gets kinda annoying when they don't shut up and Johnny has to ask you what the teacher was saying, but when Jaehyun asks, your heart might just burst.

He always speaks in a soft voice and taps your shoulder when he needs something. One day he needed a pencil, which is unfortunately the one day you woke up late and forgot to wear a bra and pack your regular clothes to change into after 7 AM marching rehearsals, so you sported a wrinkly, loose tank top and running shorts the whole day.

"Hey, I left my pencil bag at home while revising for the Socratic Seminar, do you have an extra pencil I can borrow?"

Your eyes widen and you always get shocked when he asks you for stuff instead of Johnny, because it's not like you guys are close or anything. It doesn't help that the teacher put the air conditioner on full blast and his warm, soft fingertips leaves your shoulder and heart ablaze.

"Y-yeah! I only use mechanical pencils so I hope you don't mind." You bend down and start digging in your backpack only to hear Johnny snicker in front of you. At first you ignore it because it's Johnny, and the little (pretty gigantic) shithead laughs at everything, like the pictures of nude statues your teacher took during her trip to Italy. It's only when Jaehyun tells him to "stop staring" when you realize what exactly he's laughing at. It's also then that you realize Jaehyun has a perfectly clear view of the predicament you're in, with the room being cold, you practically giving him a free show, and now that you look down, there's a bit of fake grass down there too. When you're in marching band and have to rehearse every morning for two hours, bits and pieces of the turf from the football field starts to collect in your clothes and then you end up having your own little football field.

Damn, do wish I could choke on those turf turds and never have to think of this day ever again. But no, it gets even better. Jaehyun is polite enough to look at the board and pretend whatever happened just now didn't, and when you finally hand him your pencil, he does something that makes your insides turn in twists and makes your cheeks and ears feel hot. He takes off the jacket he has on and drapes it over your shoulders, and gently places his thumb on your collarbone to sweep the little artificial blade of grass off.

Johnny whistles lowly and Jaehyun hits his shoulder hard enough for him to wince, and looks at you with a sincere smile, dimples and all, and says to you "You can wear the hoodie all day if you want to, I don't need it."

You can't tell if you're living in a fantasy at this moment and you just stare at him and say, "You can keep the pencil all day too." You must be seeing things because you see a faint rosy color collect on his cheeks.

After using the water fountain, you're lost in thought about what happened that day and how dreamy and cliche it all was. You're still lost in thought, and when you turn around you bump into someone, with your face burrowed into someone's (might you add) strong chest.

You look up and almost come stumbling down after being taken aback that Jaehyun is the one you bumped into, and he has a strong hold of your arms to keep you steady.

"You okay there?" You like to consider yourself level headed and not easily swooned by a cute face, but his parted hair and sparkly brown eyes is making you melt, and your band polo is just making you warmer as each second passes while his arms are still around you.

"I'm okay now." You smile hoping that he would just let go already because you are this close to sharting yourself. He puts his arms to his sides and steps aside from you to let you go around him and he gets to the water fountain. You're walking away as fast but casually as possible when you hear him talking to Chittaphon again.

"For a band nerd she's kinda cute, huh?"

"Ten, shut up."

"So you do think she's cute!"

The girls' portion of the game is over, with a tie in the end. The boys are up next in ten minutes.

You come back sweating just a teensy beensy bit after the awkward encounter into bumping into Jaehyun, trying to act normal as you slide into the bleachers next to your best friends Doyoung and Yeri. Yeri hands you back your clarinet paying no mind to your expression. Doyoung doesn't miss the flushed look on your face and pesters you about it.

"Did you see him or something? You look like a tomato."

"Thanks Doyoung. Yes, I did. It was awkward and I don't want to think about it." Yeri's ears perk up and faces her whole body to you.

"Well, now you have to, spill." She says. You try to keep your eyes on the leaderboard but instead have it locked on Jaehyun, seeing him stretch.

"You're drooling dear." She giggles. You hit Yeri in the arm and Doyoung laughs.

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Guys, the game is about to start." Doyoung whispers. Your band directors have been keeping a close eye on the band to see if you were paying attention or not. Not because they care about the game necessarily, but because playing pep tunes in time the home team scores a point is important. "Loses the effect" if you're seconds late he says.

All these games you've been forced to go to as a band student never interested you, and you never understood what the hell was going on anyways. The only interesting thing was seeing Jaehyun score points.

"You're being so obvious." says Doyoung.

"Suck my left ass cheek." you say in response.

"You fucking wish." You hit him in the arm and Yeri just laughs. You don't know where you would be without your companions.

The game ends with the boys' team winning (about time.) By then it's 10 pm, you're tired, your friends are tired, and you have a clarinet lesson tomorrow in the morning. You just want to skidaddle outta there as fast as you can, but thank goodness you took your time walking and talking with Doyoung and Yeri, otherwise, Jaehyun might've missed the chance to talk to you.

You shoot daggers at Doyoung when you hear him snicker. Yeri gives you a thumbs up while they both watch you gawk at Jaehyun. That boy is truly Adonis reincarnated, hell, perhaps even better.

"I wanted to say sorry for bumping into you earlier and-" you blink back in surprise. Shouldn't this be the other way around? You were the one daydreaming and being distracted.

"I'm sorry to interrupt Jaehyun but, I feel like I'm the one that should apologize. I was the one spacing out and bumped into you.”

“To be totally real with you, I just needed an excuse to talk to you, regardless if it’s your fault or not...which I don’t think it is anyways, but I digress.” you just blink blankly at him.

“Uhm..okay. What is it you wanted to say?” you ask.

“Would you like to go on a date with me?”

Out of the corner of your eye, you see Yeri smacking her hands and jumping up and down with Doyoung trying to grab her arm to make sure the two of them are out of sight of Jaehyun so they don’t embarrass you. You’ll need to thank Doyoung later.

“I’m really flattered, but why me exactly?” Now it’s Jaehyun’s turn to stare at you blankly.

“Because you’re cute, for one, and you seem like a good time. I’ve been meaning to ask you for a while but couldn’t find the guts to actually ask.” he laughs under his breath while scratching the back of his head.

“Yes.” you say.

“Wait, what?” he says dumbfounded. It physically hurts Doyoung to overhear how slow you guys are to put two and two together and realize you like each other already.

“Yeah, I’d actually love to go on a date with you.”

Jaehyun smiles that precious dimpled smile and says “I’ll text you when I’m picking you up.”

“You know my number?”

He chuckles awkwardly. “I had to ask one of your friends for it because of how shy I was.” You whip your head around to see Yeri and Doyoung scurrying off to the band room. You really need to thank them later. Perhaps yell at them for giving out your private information like that, but definitely thank them.

“I have to get back to my friends, but I’ll reply when you message me Jaehyun.” Before he even has the chance to say anything else, you’re catching up to Yeri and Doyoung to give them a piece of your mind.

The next day rolls around and you're a little drained from your morning lesson. Trying to play F above the staff in tune is probably the most vigorous physical activities you've ever done. You can march all day, eyes closed while using backwards technique, but an F above the staff is something else.

The night before was also draining, considering you stayed up really late at night to wait for Jaehyun's text. You figured his friends dared to ask you out, something like that, because why would a boy that handsome and popular ask you out? Fortunate, very fortunate, that you didn't fall asleep just yet, because when 12:30 AM rolls around, that's when you hear the high pitched ping.

Jaehyun: sorry for texting late! I hope you're not asleep or anything. I just got back from having celebratory pizza with the team. :P

You: Nah, I was just scrolling through my phone haha, I sleep super late because of band and procrastination. Also, don't you have an iPhone? Why are you using regular emoticons lol

Jaehyun: :D well I'm glad you asked. I just find them cuter lmao

Jaehyun: Like you

You would like to think you're a reasonable person. A reasonable person who sees a good opportunity and takes it. This moment is an example of a good opportunity to flirt back. Did you do it? No, instead you were spazzing out on your bed while texting in the group chat for you, Yeri, and Doyoung about the screenshot you just took of the convo with Jaehyun. Precious time spent on spazzing was wasted. A winky face would have sufficed, but no, you just had to react like any teenage girl in some dumb book. Jaehyun changes the subject after exactly 6 minutes of waiting for your reply.

Jaehyun: Does 6 pm sound good for our date?

You: totally

Definitely didn't sound like a surfer just then

Jaehyun: (typing)

At this moment, Jaehyun was deciding whether or not to call you babe and say goodnight. He was typing for so long that you started to panic (for no reason at all.) If your heart wasn't already racing any further, good thing Ten was sleeping over at Jaehyun's and leaning over his shoulder the whole time, because he pressed send.

Jaehyun: That's cool, see you then babe. Night :)

Needless to say, Yeri and Doyoung were blowing up the groupchat after your screenshot.

A/N: what do you guys think? please send commentary, it would mean very much! I’ll be making part 2...at some point.

#jaehyun scenarios #jaehyun scenario #jaehyun imagines #jaehyun imagine #jaehyun #jung jaehyun #nct scenarios #nct imagines

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fallenrazziel · 5 years

Text

The Adventures of Erwin & Levi #9

[Translation from french ; I hope it's good^^]

A little stupid thing written late at night, but it feels good to let off steam! XD

The text is mainly composed of dialogue exchanges, a bit like a skit, to highlight the comic and dynamic side of scenes^^

MEN'S THINGS

Eren was standing in front of Commander Erwin's office door and was about to knock with discretion, his bundle of reports in his hand. He was well aware of the late hour but Oluo had instructed him to hand over these papers to the Commander personally and he couldn't refuse. He would have preferred to go to bed but the satisfaction of the done duty would make him sleep better.

His fingers brushed against the varnished wood when a jolt on his shoulder made him turn around.

E - "Jean ! What are you doing here ?!"

J - "What about you then ? It's time to sleep for kids !"

E - "Go to the stables instead to say bullshit ! I have to hand over these reports to Commander Erwin ! I'm not anybody, huh !"

J - "You must be joking ! Stop boasting yourself because you suddenly became interesting !"

E - "And you, why are you here ?"

J - "Because since you got permission not to rot away in the basement of the headquarters, I have to support your presence every night, I'm not sleeping any more ! You massively snore and release farts ! It cannot last !"

E - "I release farts, me? It's not going well in your head ? You know it's Bertholt who has gas !"

J - "Go sniff your sheets and we'll talk again about it ! I'm going to ask to Commander the permission to change dormitory to not suffer you more !"

E - "Have you not finished your childishness ? There are titans out there who want to eat us and you..."

J - "We must also talk about it ! It's all because of you all this shi..."

The door suddenly opened in front of them and the two boys stood at attention, prepared to salute Commander Erwin. But it was Corporal Levi whom they discovered in front of them. In a shirt, a little untidy, as suddenly pulled from his sleep. And the face barred of an expression of discontent... The two teenagers didn't know what to say in front of this apparition quite unexpected.

L - "Why are you screaming in front of the door, brats ? You shouldn't go to bed ?"

E - "That's... uh, um... here, I've these reports for the Commander..."

L - "Give me that, Yeager, I'll give it to him later, he has something else to do, there... And you, Kirschtein ?...

J - "Oh, uh... oh, it can wait tomorrow, without a shadow of a doubt !"

L - "Since this is the way , good evening, and no more a noise or I send you both to dungeons."

E & J - "Understood, Corporal !!"

The door slammed shut in the face of the two young soldiers who remained for two minutes without saying anything. Then Jean decided to whisper :

J - "What was he doing there ?..."

E - "Do you imagine what I imagine ?..."

J - "I hope not, you're so crooked..."

E - "Did you see his look ? In the Commander's office..."

J - "It's just an office..."

E - "It's also his bedroom !"

J - "Yikes, shut up, don't put these mental images in my head !"

E - "Do you think that's true, these rumors running over them ?"

J - "What are you talking about ?"

E - "Things I read in newspapers..."

J - "Holy Maria, what newspapers do you read ?!"

E - "What if we looked through the lock ?"

J - "Stop it, dumbass !"

E - "Ah, we see nothing, the key must be in it ! And if we listened a little ?"

J - "You're mad, they've eyes and ears everywhere, they're going to get us !"

E - "I want to know !"

J - "You really are a pervert, it doesn't concern us what they do in there !"

But Eren was already listening to the office wall.

E - "We hear nothing ... They must speak low..."

J - "If they just talk, I'm fine ! Come on, we're off !"

E - "Wait, a little more..."

____________________________________________

On the other side of the wall, in Commander Erwin's office, a strange ritual had already begun.

E - "Who was it ?"

L - "Yeager and Kirschtein, still biting each other's heads off."

E - "Aah, this youth is full of energy ! We must be too old to understand these bickering..."

L - "Speak for yourself. They looked shocked, maybe you should have opened."

E - "I couldn't, I had to heat that wonder... What do you think they thought ?"

L - "I dunno, that we're doing men's things, I suppose... Nah, they're not able imagining things like that yet..."

E - "Do you think they're too young to imagine that ?"

L - "And how ! They must not even have hair on their legs."

Levi took a seat on the couch and pulled off his pants to find himself in underwear. Quite at ease, he watched his superior work on his side, slumped on the couch, legs crossed. He was hoping for a nice evening...

L - "That's not all, Erwin, but if we started ? Come here and take care of me."

E - "Are you impatient ?"

L - "A little, yeah, I'd like to test this new thing you found in Mitras."

E - "It's one of our sponsors who makes it."

L - "Ah, I didn't know that one of our donors was doing "this"... It's quality, I hope ?"

E - "Wait, I read the packaging... "For a perfect glide, comfort and pleasure guaranteed." It's very popular among the nobility, it seems..."

L - "Awesome. At least I can hope you'll not hurt me tonight..."

E - "It happens so often ?"

L - "And how ! The last time, I could hardly stand up, I had to invent some fibs for Mike and For-Eyes wouldn't suspect anything. You should learn to go soft !"

E - "Sorry ! I'll try to be very sweet this time..."

L - "You had better, if you come to nothing, you'll pay when it's your turn..."

E - "Oooh, could you hurt me a lot ?"

L - "Highly. Apply yourself, get your thing ready."

E - "I think that's it, I've reached the right consistency. Corporal, in position !"

Levi lay on the couch and extended his bare leg to Erwin, who put his heel on his shoulder. The Commander gauged at a glance the black hairs of medium length which covered the surface of skin that presented him his subordinate.

E - "It push back at a speed..."

L - "No comment, concrete, Commander."

E - "Ok, are you ready ? I'm going !"

Erwin passed the spatula covered with hot wax on Levi's leg and began to count the seconds...

____________________________________________

HAAAAAHAAAHAAAAAAA !!! DAMN FUCK ERWIIIIIIIINN !!!

Eren and Jean jumped back, took each other in their arms and stuck to the wall, gasping, across the hall.

J - "Did you hear that ?!"

E - "Damn, hear the Corporal suffer like that, it's absolutely terrifying !"

J - "What are they doing ?!"

E - "Don't try to understand, it was a bad idea !"

J - "Of course, I told you ! You never listen ! I'll have nightmares for the rest of my life right now !"

E - "Imagine they are... they do..."

J - "Aaah, shut up, moron, I'd rather smell your sharts every night than think about it for a second !"

E - "It's not me, I tell you, it's Bertholt !"

J - "Surely not, all that smells bad, it comes from you ! I am leaving !"

E - "You coward ! In addition you accuse me without proof !"

J - "Continue squealing like that and I tell everyone that you spied the Commander and the Corporal while they were doing dirty things !"

E - "You were there too, horse head !"

J - "You forced me to stay, big looser !"

The sound of an angry step was heard in the office, heading dangerously towards the door. Eren and Jean took to their heels, united in the effort against adversity this time.

#eruri #os #one-shot #funny #erwin smith #levi ackerman #jean kirschstein #eren yeager #fanfiction #fallenRaziel gameplay #the adventures of erwin & levi #fallenRaziel #translation from french #aot #snk #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin

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drabblemesilly · 5 years

Text

Mathew Barzal #4

Requested by Anon: Hi! Could you maybe do a Mathew Barzal where his girlfriend is Finnish and they would go and meet her family for the first time?? Love you <3

*Love you!! I’m sorry for making you wait so soo long. I hope you like this. :* Also, I know I have a LOT of Finnish readers so please feel free to correct my mistakes. Thank you! Enjoy!*

Word count: 945

It’s the staccato of his foot tapping on the floor that gave him away. Mathew Barzal, conqueror of Calder Memorial Trophies and hearts of girls across the Northern American continent, is nervous. And judging by the way his nose is flaring, it’s the kind of nervous that may lead to him sharting all over the place.

“Relax,” you grabbed his ice cold hand and squeezed, “they’re just my parents.”

He coughed, “easy for you to say,” he huffed, eyes darting everywhere, “they’re your parents.”

Well, true.

Leaning over, you gave him a chaste kiss on the cheek, “yeah but I’ve met your family and I came out fine, right?”

“I mean,” he quirked an eyebrow at you, “they were bound to like you.”

“And my mom and dad are bound to like you too,” you assured him.

He chuckled, “I seem to remember you telling me that your dad wasn’t thrilled that you’re dating a hockey player.”

You shrugged, “what can I say?” you grinned, “I’m a risk taker.”

Instead of giving you a coherent answer, he tugged on your hand a little, bringing you closer to him.

“Does my breath smell bad?” he asked, opening his mouth and exhaling a little.

Swatting him away, you frowned, “you are disgusting,” you snorted, “and no, your breath smells like mint.”

The arrival hall of the John F. Kennedy International Airport has never been busier. Judging by the thick mass of people gathering around, buzzing with excitement, you’d think Queen Bey was here. Of course your parents would pick the middle of the holiday season to visit you and not tell you about it until three days before their actual flight.

Surprise, bitch.

And in true Mathew Barzal fashion, he just went into overdrive preparing for your parents’ arrival. As if he was their son. As if your dad was excited to meet him – which he definitely isn’t, by the way.

You can still remember your dad’s booming voice when you showed him a picture of your new boyfriend a couple of months ago when you went home.

“Vitsailetko,” was what he said before turning to your mom and looking at her in disbelief.

He asked if your were kidding. Were you kidding?

“No,” you walked over to your dad and kissed his cheek, “I’m not joking and honestly, for a hockey fan, you’re not that excited.”

The next hour was spent with him lecturing you how hockey players are good on the ice and not off it.

Which brings you to the present situation: Mathew Barzal almost shitting his pants from nervousness and you… you really just want to get out of this freezing airport and into your warm apartment.

“My dad’s not gonna bite you, you know,” you bumped your hip with his, “he’s probably just gonna stare you down.”

He shifted, “that’s comforting,” he said, sarcastically.

“Are you legit scared?” you laughed, you never really saw your deal ol’ dad as someone scary.

Mat looked at you like you grew another head, “are you legit asking?”

You snorted, “oh my gosh, my dad’s harmless, they’ll love you!” you elbowed him gently, “you got them tickets for tomorrow’s game!”

“Just another reminder that I play hockey, eh?” he asked, looking really scared now.

“That’s your day job, bub,” you answered, “it’s not like you can just quit. And besides” you shrugged, “I kinda like seeing you all scruffy when you play.”

Mat opened his mouth to say something but stopped and gulped instead, looking at something behind you. Turning around, you saw your parents happily walking towards you, your mom looking a little happier than your dad.

When they finally reached you, neither of them said anything, and instead eyed Mathew like he was a proper stranger.

“Hei äiti,” you greeted your mom, giving her a kiss and a tight hug before giving your dad the same, “isä. How was the flight?”

Your dad grumbled something in return before returning your hug. Your mom, on the other hand, bounced like a five year old, her eyes twinkling, “on tämä poikaystäväsi?” she asked.

That was when the Mathew Barzal that you know kicked nervous Mathew Barzal’s ass.

Like something snapped inside him, Mat gave your mom a big grin and offered his hand, “yes, ma’am,” he started, “I’m the boyfriend.”

“What?” your mom asked, a smile still plastered on her face.

You looked at your dad, who was clearly stunned that Mathew – the Canadian love of your life -- understood your mom when she asked if he was your boyfriend.

“What?” you echoed.

“What?” he questioned, giving you another faint-inducing smile, “your mom asked if I were your boyfriend, right?” he confirmed, now moving to shake your dad’s hand, “I’m Mathew,” he said, pointing at himself, “the boyfriend.”

“Jääkiekkoilija,” you dad muttered before pasting a smile and taking Mat’s hand.

“A hockey player too,” he said cheerfully, one hundred percent understanding your dad, “I love my day job,” he grinned.

Huh.

That seemed to satisfy your dad because he looked at your mom and nodded.

Turning your head to face Mat, you gave him an incredulous look, “who are you and what did you do to my boyfriend?” you inquired, pinching his nose a little.

“Still me,” he gleamed.

“When did you learn Finnish?” you whispered, curiosity lacing your voice.

He frowned, “since I asked you out?”

“WHAT!” you playfully slapped his belly, “you didn’t even tell me?”

“Surprise?” he smiled.

You tightened his coat, pulling him slightly towards you, “I am so in love with you right now.”

He chortled, “stop,” he joked, “your dad’s watching.”

“Love you.”

He ruffled your hair, “back at ‘ya.”

#mathew barzal #mathew barzal imagines #hockey imagines #nhl imagines #drabble #drabbles #imagines #fanfic #my writing #new york islanders

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tenta-midnight · 5 years

Text

I’m tired why did I make this-

"A little bit over here...And a bit more there...And...There we go!" Aloe put the finishing touches on Cyborg's new update. "Mmmmm...Is it done yet?" "Yep!" Aloe grinned. "The update is done!" "Awesome!" Cyborg smiled as they managed to sit up on the table. "So what'd you give me?" Cyborg asked eagerly. The grin on Aloe's face faltered a bit. "Well um...Uh...Heh..." Grrrrrrrmmmmmm... An ominous sounding growl emitted from Aloe's stomach, making him blush a bit. "You okay? That sounded painful." Cyborg said, slightly concerned. "Y-Yeah. Let's try out that new update shall we?" "Hell yeah! What're we gonna do?" "Lay back down." Cyborg tilted his head at Aloe's request. "L-Lay back down?" "Yeah. The update'll work easier that way." Cyborg shrugged a bit and laid back down. "Soooo, what do you want me to-HUH?!" Before Cyborg could finish their sentence, they were met with Aloe's ass close to their face. GGGGGGGGRRRRRRGGGGGG!! Aloe's stomach let out another growl, this one sounding louder and more painful. As soon as they heard the growl, Cyborg's eyes widened in shock. "W-Wait, you're seriously gonna-" PPPPPBBBBBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTT!!!! "Aaahhh~" Aloe let out a soft sigh of relief, chuckling a bit. "What do you think?" "Oh god that smells terrible!!! What did you eat?!" Cyborg groaned in disgust. "How can I even smell that?!" "That's part of the update, obviously. And I think this is an excellent way to test it out." "By making me smell your farts?!" "Yes. And if you're gonna complain, I'll keep going until you're unconscious." In an instant, Cyborg shut their mouth, trembling a bit. "Don't be so silent, I need you to give me details on how they smell." Cyborg groaned. "Do I have to-" PPPPPRRRRRRAAAAAAABBBBBBTTTTTTTT!! Aloe grinned deviously as he ripped a wet, eggy fart into Cyborg's mouth, causing them to groan and squirm. "My mouth was open!!" "Oh I know~" PPPPPPPRRRRRRAAAAAAPPPPP!!! "Mmmmmf~ Damn, that one was raunchy~" PLLLLLLLLRRRRRFFFFFTTTT!!! "Ohhhhh god that's a bad one~!" Prrrrrrtttt! Pppprrrraaaapppp! Blllllbbbbtt!! "Daaaaaamn! 3 bad ones in a row!!" Aloe grinned as he let out fart after terrible fart. Cyborg quietly groaned as they tried to hold back the urge to puke(If they could) "A-Aloe...when are you gonna be empty?" PPPPPRRRRROOOOORRRRTTTT!!! "Mmmmmm~ I have no idea! I ate so much gassy foods, I'm probably just a gas producer~!" Grrrrrrrrrgggggllllll.... One last ominous growl emitted from Aloe's stomach, making him grin a bit. "Ohhhhhohoho~ this is gonna be a terrible one~" And with that, Aloe used a free hand to lift a leg, grunting slightly. "Oh god please don't-" ppppprrrrrrrrrr.... Aloe's fart started off soft and bubbly, no smell so far...

...rrrrrAAAAAOOOOOOO...

The fart started to get louder and louder, a small scent of rotten cheese started to show in Cyborg's senses.

...OOOOORRRRRRAAAAAAPPPPPPP...

The rotten cheese smell started to get stronger, a disgusting old beans smell joining in.

...PPPPPRRRRRRRROOOOORRRRRRRPPPPPTTTT!!!!

Aloe let out an orgasmic like moan of relief as the surprisingly long fart finally came to an end. "Hohoholy SHIT! That was...That was..." He was at a loss for words. "Cyborg! Cyborg! You HAVE to tell me that-Oh shit Cy!!" He quickly got off of Cyborg to see if they were okay. Fortunately, they were still alive, and coughing uncontrollably. "Oh thank go-" Pllllllrrrr...BLLLRRRRTTT!!A terribly wet, toxic shart slipped out of Aloe's ass, making his eyes widen in horror. "Oh FUCK!!!" He quickly got up and ran to the bathroom. Watchng Aloe run to th bathroom made Cyborg grin a bit. "Ha ha...That's what you get Aloe...!!"

#eproctophilia #aloe cookie #cyborg cookie #Cookie Run OvenBreak

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rustdream · 5 years

Text

@joeyydrawss

This is based off of one line about the dark clone gang being villains in cragtworld.

First, as a writing warm up, a shart drabble)

"But, why DO we have have names like that?" The pale Cyclops spoke up, as she tightened the ropes around Sack thing. Her question was met with an awkward silence, before Dark!Rain wandered. "What do you mean? What's wrong with 'fe names, Ima?" Her cracked eye met the her colleague's leaking black ones, a small feeling of confusion placed in her mind. After all, she hadn't anticipated having to explain her question. She had only snapped out of her thoughts as she tried to walk towards the brown cloaked girl, before noticing that she had tied her hands to the ropes. How embarrassing. The two others in the room didn't seem to judge though, as their hostage was rightfully afraid. Why their leader suggested this was beyond her. "Well, I mean, it seems weird to call ourselves. Well, now that I say it it sounds like something to tell Joey about." She finally got free, though her hands hurt from tugging on the ropes so hard. Before DRain could speak up, DIma continued, "C-cause, it's understandable that YOU would calk yourself Rain, cause you ARE her!" DRain nodded in agreement, a smug smirk worming its way into her face. "And me, Ima is technically my name, all that I remember from my legal name. But what about Joey? He utterly HATES his other self, so it seems weird."

"Well...ah, ya got me here. If ya want, we can go ask him."

"What if he gets angry?"

"Ill take tha fall for it. Even then it's just a question. How bad can that be?"

And so the two left the room, as Sack thing noticed that the ropes have become looser from the tugging. Now all they had to do was plan an escape.

Real story under here/

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

|another random one: context, what if ADITLOF was affect by the dark clone crew|

The gang could only stare in confusion as Rain and Ima struggled to get out of the guards grasp, while Newton was talking to strange man with some fish on his head. Bill almost chuckled at hearing Wheatley comment on this. "Well, this trip could have gone better." "I don't see how it can. I'd love to hear Rain use her 'freindly charm' on this." He was shot a mean glare, which was meet with an eye roll. He decided to look away from Rain desperately explaining herself, as he overheard Mewton's conversation with the man.

"I can't believe you've associated with criminals now, first the titans now this-."

"I-its not like that. Papa! I-"

"Well the way you've avoided us I doubt you was bringing them in."

"Because they haven't done anything wrong, they don't deserve prison!"

"While I can't say the same about the rest of them, THOSE two," He shot a horrid glare directly at Ima, how got as close to Rain as she could, who was speaking, while tearing something off her shirt," are wanted criminals. Thousands of crimes are on their hands, Newton. How can you defend them?"

"Rain and Ima, they would never do this! They're my friends, Papa, a-at least let them prove that they didn't do anythin-"

"THE ONE EYED ONE HAS A WEAPON!" The two guards bellowed, pulling everyone's attention to Ima, who had a pin in her hand. "T-this isn't a weapon, just a pin that was picking my skin! Also," she put it in her pocket, a look of what Bill could only place as offended unamesment. "why are we being accused of something that we didn't even do, if this is our first time coming here?" Rain added on, "Not to mention...what DID we do?" A long pause, as Newton gestures, a brief look of triumph in his eyes. Until he saw the stern, angered look in his father's face. The older sackperson slowly walked towards the girl, the guards letting her go. "Oh, I'm sorry, but you've been here before." Rain backed away, Ima still standing there, silent.

Compared to her, he was really tall. To tell you the truth, Ima sort of regretted saying that now. "Ima, is it? Let's see, you've destroyed many, many cities and towns in Craftworld, terrorized Bunkum, KIDNAPPED and endangered a CREATIR CURATOR, and that's only before you've meet you ACCOMPLICE Rain. Who is the reason Manglewood is stuck in a large area of tar, endangered MILLIONS in the act- MAY I GO ON!?" His tone reached a new level that Newton hadn't though of before. In fact, he even had to be held back by the younger man to prevent him from pummeling the girl into the ground. The two girls were taken aback- the whole group was. Rain, a villain? She's a hero, the kindest person ever! Even if it annoyed Bill to no end. And Ima... actually, Both Bill and Ima seemed to consider the notion that she might have done those things before. It was nigh improbable, but still.

"but, we didn't do those things." Was all Rain could muster, still shocked at the man sudden change in behavior. Newton was pushed away as the two guards were attempted to pull him back as Newton had. "DO YOU REALLY THINK," The two friends now where close together, unsure of why this was happening, they haven't done anything wrong, "I'M STUPID ENOUGH TO ACTUALLY BELIEVE ANY WORD YOU SA-" Suddenly, an explosion could be heard, as a piece of debris came between the man and the two girls, causing him to stop, and the group to panic. Almost stumbling to the ground, Bill managed to get a glance at the three people through the smoke. The first thing he could notice, where how two of them had an almost likeness to Rain and Ima, the only differences were Tue Rain clones black eyes and brown jacket, and the how the air around the other clone seemed off. Dark, suffocating cold. As it would sometimes become when Ima entered. Though her skin was a sickly pale, and her screen was cracked. Before he could even look at the third one, they closed in, the other Rain holding the odd man by the throat with a black liquid, and another one, a person he had never seen before, pinning him against a wall, with weapons threatening another group of people.

That only left the third one, who seems to have closed off all entrances and exits, before staying the the middle of the building, keeping an eye on every panicked person. The man struggled, as his son screamed. "Papa no-" thrown into a wall by the other Ima. "Listen up you fucking shits," the boy, who held his weapons tight, his red eyes scanning the room, started, "This. Is a holdup. And from now on, you're staying here until those hero twats come to rescue you. And if you try to leave, my freinds over there will kill you." He gestured to the two, who had tied most of the people in tar, with the other Ima looking over the rest, before Rain spoke up. "Wait a minute, bad language aside, WHI ARE YOU?" The boy threw a knife at Rain, cutting her cheek in the process, and cracking the glass floor it landing in. Storm seems to become uncomfortable in her reflection, as the cracks ran a little. The boy smirked. "I guess an introduction is only complimentary. I'm Joey. Or Dark Joey of you prefer, I dont really care." Joey smirked as he pointed at the other two. "The one with the tar is Dark Rain, and the other is Ima."

Rain immediately answered. "Hey wait a minute, you. Is your name Rain N Thirteen?" The clone frowned. "Yeah, why ya askin'?"

"Cause that's MY name."

"Wot?" The clone looked rain up and down, her frown only growing. "Huh, I didn't know I had a fan, a little tip lady. I ditched tha blue coat long ago. Got real bloody."

"No, you don't understand. My legal name 's Rain. So what your saying isn't true."

"O ho! Look Joey, A've got meself a faker, just like tha blue spiked dork."

"If anything your the faker."

"No, you."

Joey scoffed at his comrades stupid quarrel with this weirdo. Though, something about her reflection, the black soulless stare in them. It intrigued him. As he stomped on the yellow hair dweeb's chest to stop him from moving, he looked at Ima. "And what about You? Next ill be hearing that 'yoir the real Ima!'" The girl stood a few feet from her double, who seemed to be almost crestfallen when their eyes locked. Almost as if she was remembering something. Suddenly, the double started to glitch in and out of reality, as it started to attempt to attack her. At least until a sharp object almost hit her square in the head. "Get your head in the fucking game. Come on, I'm holding these people at gunpoint here. Stop your childish squabbling and tie the rest up!"

After a good hour of fighting and bruises, they actually did it. What mad it harder was that Rain fakers apparent ability in fighting, and that other girl's freakish body manipulation. Seriously, seeing her body contrite under her skin, to grow two more grotesque arms, seeing her muscle tissue stretch and bleed to make weapons,, it was going to give Dark Rain nightmares! And not to mention Ima seemed to get more emotional in the presence of that other Ima, more evident in the way she flung her around while tied up. How she occasional kicked the other just for talking. Though, she couldn't blame her, she tied up her copy's mouth for god sake. As Joey was making his grand hammy speech as always, Rain put a hand on Ima's shoulder as she kicked the pink wearing double. "Ay. You alright there?" The other twitched as she turned to her, almost crying now. "I just want to tear her apart, she's not me, she can't be, he said that there wasn't any other-" Muffled by a hug, Rain's other arm shrugged. "Ay know, but she could be a faker, ah mean, we've got a faker over there." The clones muffled complaints went unheard. "Yeah..yeah! Y-you're right Rain! Your right. A faker..." The glitches girl was patted on the back. "Exactly! Come one, we've got a show to but on."

The two left the room, not noticing the claws breaking through the one eyed clones restraint. The duo walked out onto a platform, Joey making his evil hammy speech to his own faker, and the gang of Craftworld's hero's. "...And we will be victorious. For we are the Dark Heart Gang!"

"Wait a minute, that's a crappy name tho-"

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catswimsalot-blog · 7 years

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Worst date of my fucking life. Thanks New York.

About 3 weeks after moving to New York for my internship, I went on, hands down, the worst date of my life. My boyfriend (at the time) and I decided to take a break since it was summer and we wouldn’t see each other until August. Anyways, this date…it wasn’t even a bad date. Instead, it was basically like someone transported me into my own personal vision of hell for an hour.

A little background information about the situation: I’d been seeing this guy for maybe two weeks and was totally turned off by the fact that he had a small child that looked exactly like him. My friends were saying things like, “WHAT? You can’t date someone with a kid. That’s not you at all.“ - I’m a great listener, therefore I decided to keep seeing him.

While some women do like the whole daddy thing, I would rather stick my hand into my food processor than date someone with a kid. It’s an established fact about myself. It’s not fair on me or the kid because I currently feel like children are a burden to society.

Honestly there was nothing wrong with this guy. Okay, that’s a lie, but on the surface, he was your standard nice guy. He was good looking, seemingly sweet, and did cute things like send flowers to my work. But there was one thing I couldn’t get over. His teeth.

Scratch that. There were two things I couldn’t get over. His teeth and his voice. His teeth were the nail in the coffin for me. It’s not like they were fucked up or anything. They were incredibly nice, but why did every single one of his shiny teeth show when he smiled? Why did he clench his mouth together and talk through a smile? Smiling with your teeth clenched together, while speaking is like one of the creepiest things a person can do. Eyes wide, teeth bared. It’s a fucking aggressive look.

And don’t get me started on his voice. His voice was like a thousand pencils being electrically sharpened inside my ear drum. He spoke like an announcer at a high school baseball game. That’s honestly the best way I can describe it. I don’t know. It was weird. Pretty normal flaws to pick out about a person, right?

Even though his teeth legitimately gave me true fear, I was bored and lonely. So, one night I set up a date to go meet him in Brooklyn. I got to the restaurant a little early and waited for him to show up. I wasn’t about to sit alone for 10 minutes, so I walked into an Urban Outfitters across from where we were eating. As I browsed through some records, I noticed someone jump out from behind a clothes rack. Oh boy. This was gonna be fun. Immediate regret washed over my soul. Oh yes, I felt completely dead inside. He gave me a HUUUUUGE hug and I felt one of my ovaries just entirely remove itself from my body. We walked into the restaurant and sat down at the bar. He smiled, talking through his teeth. Oh boy.

I was peer-pressured into ordering a whiskey on the rocks, my least favorite liquor of all time. Many people love it, but due to the amount of times that I’ve thrown up onto the floors of Egan’s Bar because of it, I would rather not. In a power move, he told me that he’d be choosing the whiskey for me. He was choosing. After I just said I didn’t care for whiskey. Okay. I like a man who is a bit aggressive, but this felt like your high school prom date trying to show off by ordering you the house special. I laughed and said, “Okay, whatever. I was kind of thinking about a dirty martini, actually.” “Well, I guess you’ll just have to see what I order for you,” he said, still talking through his Mister Ed (yes, the horse) teeth. Naturally, he ordered what I wanted and then misprounced his own drink (margarita). I barely even speak Spanish and he spoke it fluently, so how did that happen? Not sure.

Conversation was sparse to say the least. This is where it gets good. First, we talked about boring things like the weather, but then it took an unexpected turn when he leaned over into my ear and sexily said: “So, your friend I met, she’s kind of fucked up, huh?”

Smooth.

How did we go about talking about the breeze in Brooklyn to my “fucked up” friend and why are you trying to make this an intimate moment? I had so many questions.

“Dude, you’ve met her once and she was extremely nice to you, what are you even talking about?” I said, attempting to avoid a sunburn on my retinas from his bleached teeth. Seriously, was he using 100 Crest white strips per day?

“No, she’s fucked up!” he aggressively countered me.

“Okay, in what way, because I definitely don’t think that? I mean, everyone has their own issues, but I legitimately have no clue what you’re talking about.” I said.

He sighed dramatically to the point where people from, oh…I don’t know, every other table could hear. “Look, you know what I’m talking about,” he said as he gripped my hand and clenched his teeth all in the same motion. He honestly looked like he just sharted.

This was just beginning to get weird. I still had about 30 more minutes of this to work through.

“What’s up with our waiter, he’s such a douche!” he began to complain within earshot of the guy serving our table. “I don’t know, I guess maybe he had a bad day. I can’t imagine that he grew up wanting to be a waiter at 30,” I responded. “Yeah, well fuck that! If I’m paying someone a tip, they’re going to work for it. He’s acting like a little bitch.” K, let’s keep in mind that the waiter is hearing this entire conversation and my face has officially turned into something that looked close to a melting clock from a Dali painting. I was in sheer horror.

I’m one of those people that let’s that shit go. Because, being a waiter sucks and I suppose I have a limited amount of empathy for others? It’s not a big deal. I’m on a date to have fun, not make other people feel uncomfortable.

Our food came out and he aggressively took our plates from the guy like a teenage girl who just got her period for the first time. I took about two bites out of my food and decided I had lost my appetite. The waiter came back by and asked how everything was, in which I took the opportunity to go ahead and grab the bill. I knew otherwise I’d be there all night dealing with this shit. When the bill came out, I cannot make this up: he threw his credit card at the bill and then picked up a knife and stared at it for about 10 solid seconds.

Interesting/terrifying.

My eyes turned towards the empty barstool beside me as I glanced at an imaginary person like, “Are you seeing this shit?”

We left the restaurant and he didn’t speak a word to me. Finally, I decided to say something. "So, what’s up with all your negative vibes tonight? You’re acting really fucking weird.”

Probably not the best thing to say to someone who’s about to kidnap you, but you know.

“I have no clue what you’re talking about. That was an amazing date! I wanted to keep hanging out! I was having a great time and you just had to end it,” he said sullenly as we approached my cab.

“Yeah…no. Things were definitely weird,” I said. He then awkwardly embraced me. I stood there with my arms pressed against my side, while he began to boa constrict around my body. I was finally released from the prison of his arms and he then began walking away in the most dramatic way that I’ve ever seen in my entire life. It was like bad child acting. He quite literally stomped off, dragging his feet with each step.

I got in the cab, took a second to collect my thoughts, and we drove past him. As the car got closer to whatever weird Frankenstein walk that he was doing, he quickly turned around in a flash, popped his head up, produced one of those psycho clenched teeth smiles, and began frantically waving to me.

What the fuck…I had to get out of here, like yesterday.

We drove up to the voucher guy and he said, "I’m sorry ma’am, we need a bill from the restaurant to let you out,” he rehearsed. "Look, dude. I just went on the worst date of my life and there’s no fucking way that I’m going back to get the bill from the guy. He’s crazy and I need to get out of here now.” He let us through. It was a good thing, because I was prepared to tell the driver to ram through the barrier at any given second. As the guy drove me home, my phone kept flashing with messages.

While this isn’t the end of this story, I feel like this is a good place to cut it.

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