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zingaplanet · 6 months

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Owen Wilson AKA chaotic gay southern middle-aged man just trying to score dammit.

#GIVE THE MAN WHAT HE WANTS DAMN YOU #It's been 17 years #he's putting out #for all these tall dark roman generals and gods as well #owen wilson #loki #lokius #mobius #loki series #natm #night at the museum #jedediah and octavius #octavius #jedtavius #tom hiddleston #steve coogan

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oopdeathnote · 11 months

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Imagine if you locked Light and Patrick Bateman in a room together. They would be having the most generic conversation but you wouldn’t be able to hear it over the sound of their overlapping internal monologues. There would be a few seconds where their monologues both play in sync to say something misogynistic.

#death note #light yagami #american psycho #patrick bateman #you could put patrick bateman in deathnote and he wouldn’t even seem particularly out of place tbh #i don’t actually like american psycho that much i just keep getting funny #patrick bateman posts on my pinterest feed #original post

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astrallar · 7 months

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This man holds my heart just like he holds these ducks

#Halsin #BG3 #baldurs gate 3 #Look I cannot put into words how much Halsin means to me #I do not have the vocabulary #But he is so gentle #and he is so powerful #like I knew I was done but the MINUTE I heard he loves ducks I was sent into oblivion #my art #I will love this man until the sun dies out

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sanctus-ingenium · 1 month

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look at my creature

#my favourite..... werewolf.......#jonathan dungeons and dragons #would have put it on the sideblog with my other references but the body/fur texture turned out really nice so here he is #creature design

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begaycommittreason · 4 months

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i’m sorry i know it was objectively rooted in logic but watching annabeth and grover plop percy’s pasty, anemic, dying ass down in some tourist fountain and intensely splash water on him like he’s some toddler they don’t know how to bathe is probably the funniest fucking thing i’ve seen in a good while

#pls it was like he was kind of on fire but they don’t understand how to put him out #pjo tv show #percy jackson tv show #percy jackson show #pjo tv spoilers #annabeth chase #grover underwood #percy jackson

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lazylittledragon · 4 months

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more domestics to warm the soul <33

#art #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #astarion #tavstarion #until they sort out the daywalker thing he's getting the taako special #if you're not putting astarion in fabulous outfits then what are you doing #also fuck you astarion for being the only fictional man that i can't Dad #that man would throw an orphan into a volcano for one corn chip #it is so important to me that dorian's eyes look like he's never had a thought

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ickypuppi3 · 1 year

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pollyanna-nana · 29 days

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Did anyone else notice that seemingly one of the first things they did after bringing Thistle into the kingdom was cut his hair short?

And given what Marcille says about how important hair is to magic…. That’s probably not a coincidence.

#polly speaks #dungeon meshi #dunmeshi #dungeon meshi spoilers #delicious in dungeon #thistle dungeon meshi #thistle posting #I haven’t seen anyone talk about this yet so I wanted to put it out there #obviously he grows it back out but Hmmmmm #Did the Tallmen advisors to the king know abt hair’s relationship to magic?? possible that they heard about it from somewhere and didn’t #want to take any chances

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birdsofpasssage · 2 months

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#putting my old wips Out There so i can finally let them go #and start with a clean slate lol #what do you mean it’s been a year since the last dain quest. WHERE IS HE NOW?#dainsleif #genshin impact #原神

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nerdpoe · 4 months

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Lucius Fox is in the drive thru for some coffee, and like. He's just. He's had a time, okay?

He's stuck on some equations in regard to the amount of torsion a joint would go through if it's half in his dimension and half in another, and it's driving him up a wall.

He's been up for like forty-eight hours, he's tired, he's thirsty, he just wants a coffee, and also how to solve this dilemma.

He doesn't expect the barista in the drive-thru he's ranting about the engineering issues to actually provide decent feedback, and give him a few alternatives.

So he rushes to the pick-up window, not even caring to order, to look at this godsend of a barista.

It's a scrawny kid with black hair and blue eyes, looking startled. Boy can't be more than eighteen.

He asks what college the kid is going to, or plans to go to.

To his absolute horror, the kid-Danny, according to the nametag-says he can't afford college. That he'd had a stint in highschool where he just hadn't been able to focus, and his parents had spent every penny they had on their own inventions.

So that was why he was a barista; because if he worked there for four years, they would offer tuition assistance.

Which.

No. No no no no no.

Lucius pulls around to march into the store, Bruce Motherfucking Wayne already blearily on his phone.

He is getting this kid, and any friend of his, into college.

If Bruce won't foot the bill, he will.

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tagerrkix · 3 months

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Eden was their ✨disney princess era✨

#it's canon #source: it was revealed to me in a dream #aziraphale being good with reptiles was all part of the ineffable plan #crowley is having the time of his life here #my only regret is that I forgot to include a baby aardvark #but I put ducklings there instead #aardvarks will have to wait #btw the snake aziraphale is holding is my pet snake that died in 2020 #my poor precious baby she was such a sweetheart #she liked to knock the thermometer off the glass and hide it #I was supposed to draw like an ordinary garter snake there buuut #it's MY silly doodle and I get to do what the heck I want with it 👁️👁️#lmao crowley's brain is really malfunctioning here #guys he's a demon the creature of darkness foul fiend devil serpent #guys he can't get up the lamb is sleeping #somebody save him #there are vicious animals #and she's exp-#*JUMPS OUT THE WINDOW AND FLIES AWAY*#hey where the fuck is the gecko going #aziraphale #good omens fanart #crowley #aziracrow #good omens #ineffable husbands

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aesthetic-uni · 10 months

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Miles “Who’s Morales” vs Gwen “Gwwwwanda” vs Pavtir “You seem like a nice young woman I do not know” FIGHT

#uni talks about the universe #spiderverse #across the spiderverse #across the spider verse spoilers #miles morales #gwen stacy #pavtir prabhakar #the spider kids DO NOT know how to lie #Jess: You know we can just teach them how to lie #Miguel: sorry no this is a canon event #Peter B: For once I agree every kid must suffer through this stage #Hobie seems like he’s immune to this #but he slipped up once and no one has ever been able to figure out what happened #there’s wild rumors going around that he will never confirm nor deny #side note Margo and Peni are also apart of the spider kids #this has nothing to do with the post I just see people leaving them out so I’m making this formal announcement to my two followers #originally I put how pav’s hair was giving him away but the scene with saving his girlfriend felt more accurate yknow?

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bigfatbreak · 5 months

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I just had the thought of Fang dragging Penny and Jagged to Marinettes since he is also not a person

mutual panic was had by all

#dad villain au #marinette dupain cheng #jagged stone #my art #fang the crocodile #i promise you this was supposed to be the episode at the hotel #and one of the students was put in charge of entertaining fang and totally failed #so he wandered out of the hotel... into the streets of paris...#lone ranger... off on his own...

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fluffylino · 4 months

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pussy drunk minho

he'll never admit how dumb he gets for your pussy~

-contains mature themes

"kitten, im not that obsessed with your pussy" minho scoffed out. you clicked your tongue.

now that was a lie.

"i doubt you could last an entire week without it" you argued back. he smirked.

"game on." now it was your turn to make a face.

"so if i win, you'll wear the collar?" his expression dropping. you could see the wheels in his head turning. wondering if he could really beat you against this game.

"that is...that is if you win. which you won't im sure of it but alright" you couldn't help but smile.

"deal"

"seriously though i can live without eating you out..." you laughed right in his face. to which he rolled his eyes.

the whole argument starting when you asked if you could dom him. his immediate response being a firm no. you couldn't help but whine, even begging for it.

if he could dom you. you could dom him.

his response being "i'd rather be the one in control. i feel uneasy submitting."

so you decided to pry more into it. you wanted to know more. to truly understand him.

"because i feel like my mind will go all fuzzy and i'll look like an idiot" that was exactly why you wanted to take charge. if not for sometime. you were happy even if it was a one time thing.

minho was cute eitherway and he'd be even more cuter on his knees.

and then what really did it for you was when he said he wasn't that obsessed with eating you out.

a lie honestly.

his morning routine consisting of waking you up with his face between your legs. breathless and absolutely horny. grinding against the mattress.

it didn't matter if he had to go out. that always came first. and he was one to give amazing head. always having that confident smirk after making you cum.

.

the day one was fine.

he seemed normal. doing his daily tasks. going to the company. coming back all sweaty and laying on your chest. you couldn't help how sweet he was.

day three was when you noticed him staring.

you hadn't even realised the t shirt you were wearing had ridden up. enough to have your panties exposed. he was talking to you about the dance formations when all of a sudden you noticed the way his eyes kept lingering downwards.

so playfully you spread your legs open and closed them. you weren't being obvious. him on the other hand was captivated.

eyes locked onto your covered heat.

"minho." you called out. he looked back at your face so fast you wanted to laugh.

"hm?" he hummed out, casually walking out of the room, mumbling that he was going to shower.

when he did go for a bath, you pressed your ear against the door. a heat pooling in your lower abdomen at the sound of him jacking off.

"pfft and he says he can do without it" you muttered under your breath.

.

"you want my cunt so bad, don't you baby" you teased. loving the way he hid his face in the pillows beside you. it looked like he was throwing a tantrum.

"come onnn just put the collar on and then you can taste me-" you suggested, rubbing his back.

"no no no no no-" he chanted cutting you off mid sentence, voice muffled.

stubborn as hell. there was no possible way he would do it.

.

"was it that difficult, huh?" minho stared up at you with crazy eyes.

first of all, to get him on his knees was a hassle. and now he glared at you playfully. you let out a small laugh. he really looked like an angry kitten. the clip on cat ears and black collar around his neck made him look so soft.

"are you gonna be a goo-"

"just let me eat y-" you clicked your tongue. now he was really pissing you off. a bratty smile on his face. you just wanted to slap him.

"yes yes. now can i-"

"thats it. im done" you stood up, ready to leave. until you were pulled back. minho gripping your thighs. a look of guilt on his face.

"i'm sorry. i'll be good" he mumbled, a small pout emerging.

"promise?"

"hmmmm"

you sighed. you didn't trust him yet. so you took the leash out. his mouth opening and closing when you hooked it onto the collar. his eyes locked onto were you clutched the leash.

"wh-"

his original question turning into a breathy moan. his face plummeting between your legs.

inhaling your soaked panties for a good few seconds. before he lifted his head back up.

using his teeth to take off your panties. you could see the way his breath hitched upon seeing your cunt. it had been so long since. he saw your pussy. after days. up close. leaning in.

a firm tug to the collar. a small grunt leaving him.

"you think you can just get right into it?" you raised an eyebrow, looking down at him. he seemed to understand. his pride wouldn't let him. but reluctantly he asked.

"may i...please?"

you nodded. satisfied.

.

you gasped. fuck you hadn't even realised how much you missed his mouth on you. his tongue licking into your cunt.

nose deliciously rubbing against your clit. face practically buried there. you were worried he wouldn't be able to breathe.

so you held onto his collar, pulling him back.

"m-mmmh... i-ive been so good" he whined, breathing heavily. your essence and his spit staining his chin and nose.

you noticed he was hard. precum soaking into his sweatpants.

"don't think i didn't notice you humping my foot" you choked out.

pussy throbbing at the loss of contact. you needed his mouth back on you.

"couldn't h-help it, sorry" he apologised, keeping his head down. as if he didn't deserve it. you ran your hands through his hair, tucking a few strands behind his ear.

"its okay, kitten. use my leg, hm?" you reassured, closing your legs around his head.

"aahmmhh f-fuck" minho cried out. enveloped by your thighs. nevertheless taking the opportunity to slurp at your dripping cunt. lewd noises echoing throughout the room.

his hips slowly moving. beginning to grind against your foot. you unconciously pressed down on his cock.

a muffled whimper escaping him.

"you're such a slut, a-aren't you" you hissed out. his lips wrapped around your swollen clit. as he sucked. pushing his nose against your cunt. trying to take more than he could possibly handle.

"say it, baby. you're a slut.." he gasped, glassy eyes looking up at you. sweat dripping down his neck.

lips swollen and red.

"s-slut for...for your p-pussy" he repeated. begging to make you cum.

"dumb f-for your cunt only ahhh"

"please p-please c-cum m-mommy" your breath hitching at the name. you let him get back. cock begging for release.

"gonna cum?" you whimpered out, nearly your climax. his head shaking as he humped your leg desperately.

"c-come on kitty, make me cum"

you moaned loudly, his wet muscle shoved so deep inside of you. his own high pitched moan joining you. both of you cumming at the same time.

a wet patch on his pants. his hips still bucking as he let his tongue hang out. riding his climax out.

nevertheless he cleaned you up. licking and running his tongue through your folds. making sure to not waste a single drop of your tasty essence.

small little whines leaving him at your taste.

"my perfect kitty" you praised him. minho panting as he looked at you. pouting. asking for a kiss. his head resting against your thigh.

"good k-kitty?"

"did so good for me"

.

"yeah okay okay...im a hundred percent drunk on your damn pussy"

"AHAH SO I WON-"

.

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jellie-the-aqua-puma · 6 months

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Chuuya’s so funny because he literally shows up to do the bare minimum (unless Dazai is involved).

Like mfkr, you’re the strongest person in the world, what do you mean “oh no! he sliced through the helicopter blades! What are we going to do?!”

Your power is near limitless. Take your pick of defensive techniques. Throw him to space. Grind him to dust. Carry the helicopter away???

Why are you making people jump out of planes and sacrifice their lives when you can juggle the opps until their brains are mush?

He’s like “Mori said let them on the helicopter. I did my part.”

“Oh no; that kid and that guy from that place that Dazai occasionally volunteers at are strapped to bombs?” … “Well it’s my day off so more power to them.” ✌🏼

The absolute bare minimum. He’s so funny.

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akanemnon · 6 months

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It's an upgrade?

FIRST - PREVIOUS - NEXT

MASTERPOST (for the full series / FAQ / reference sheets)

#deltarune #deltarune fanart #undertale #undertale fanart #deltarune comic #crossover #utdr #ralsei #chara #twin runes #twin runes comic #twin runes au #my art #ralsei is questioning everything he knows right now #this silly child can fit SO MANY ISSUES #also turns out they still suck at thinking things through #who thinks stabbing is a good way to put out a fire?#don't do this at home

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