u guys keep forgetting they are bitchy. the divorce is not gonna look like crowley trashing the bookshop or anything like that but it is gonna look like crowley reserving all the tables at the ritz for the day he knows aziraphale is going to be in town. aziraphale ordering angels to make it cloudy during an eclipse. crowley starting a bidding war over a prophecy book aziraphale wants. aziraphale undoing crowley’s miracle block on parking ticket officials. crowley ordering a cleaning service to the bookshop. aziraphale putting crowley’s apartament on mormon missionary’s lists. crowley and aziraphale separately bitching about the other to any human they coming into contact with and then being shocked when the human asks how long they had been with their ex. both of them religiously checking each other’s locations.

i’m so exhausted it’s not even funny. i need dilf!kirishima to snuggle me up on that big, warm chest of his and let me nap while he slowly rearranges my guts.

he’s sweet as always. and loves when you’re pliant and sleepy.

“aww… you sleepy, kiddo? wanna snuggle up with me?… come cuddle with me and have a nap.… atta girl, all nice and cozy…. what’s that?… you feel funny?… don’t worry, baby, daddy’s gonna make you feel all better real soon….”

Is he kissing, sniffing or eating ratoier?

"Not all men–"

Yeah, 'cause Jake Donfort would never.

Listen

Listen

Imagine rolan DOES NOT INVITE FUCKING ANYONE TO HIS WEDDING

Just cal and Lia are there and their p much the only ones in town who know he's married.

So he just rolls up one day witha. Wedding ring welded to his horn and no one who NOT A TIEFLING knows what it fucking is.

And he's gorgeous, he just is ok. Eventually it becomes very apparent that certain people think he's a bachelor. These people FLIRT BOLDLY with him and he's just trying to get away.

UNTIL

He winds up cornered at some event someone is aggressively trying to get his attention, and he's SICK OF IT! So he finally just

" have you no shame?! Are you BLIND!?"

Pointing to his horn jewelry

" What do you think this is !? I AM MARRIED!!!"

Him just absolutely over all of it and marching out the damn place but stopping at the door

" HOMEWRECKER!"

Him immediately going home to pout with his spouse and just bitch about it.

Lol

I know he would NEVER, but still. Bless ur heart Tav

he is working so hard

Cherry chaser Kirishima who despite the reputation is so easy to trust and too charming not to fall for him.

Who takes them on lavish vacations and pays for the best of everything. Who spoils them and treats them like royalty and has them falling in love and thinking they’re the one who’ll change him.

And the poor sweet little thing, he always really likes them, but he’s been burned one too many times to fall in love again. He’d rather play with that cute untouched pussy for a while before ruining their standards for other men.

He only falls in love for the night he spends carefully working his thick cock into that night’s sweet little virgin pussy

Who bribed him to do this and how did you do it

He's channelling his inner Vetinari. I can't even-

hold the fucking phone

people are theorizing that crowley might be conspiring with shax??? and that he turns gabriel in and becomes a duke of hell???? people are thinking that Anthony Janthony Crowley turns on azi and sits on some throne in hell while demons attack the bookshop???????

I'm sorry but he would never and i will die on this hill

HIS ARMS MAN. HIS GODDAMN ARMS.

I CAN NO LONGER CONTAIN THE BEAST

One of my favorite things to do is somehow fit every single Sonic continuity together. Just ignore plot holes and work completely off of vibes. Fit all the games, comics, shows, spin offs, all of it into one giant timeline. "Why does this game come before this show?" Because I said so, that's why

EVERYONE STOP SAYINF THAT CROWLEY IS GOING TO BETRAY AZIRAPHALE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! STOPTHESE ALLEGATIONS!!!!!!!

Eddie angst with happy endings? Perfect. Eddie angst where he pines after reader for the longest time and acts like a dumbass? Pure perfection. Eddie angst where both him and reader pretend to hate each other but actually love each other so much they would die for one another? My favorite thing ever. Eddie angst where him and reader hate fuck and then accidentally confess their feelings for each other? YES!

Eddie angst with sad endings? Awful. Eddie angst where he cheats on reader? Unrealistic and out of character af! That man would worship the ground you walk on, never would he ever even think about another person, this man is romantic and loving, he would love you so much his heart would almost burst every time he even looks at you. This man would never betray his lover, not even in his mind. If he loves, he loves hard and genuinely. You’re his forever and he’s yours forever.