#guess who's posting after being inactive for weeks
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After a mission
#chainsaw man#csm#chainsaw man fanart#aki hayakawa#himeno#my art#illustration#guess who's posting after being inactive for weeks
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UPDATE 9/2/23
Wow, it's almost fall and I'm still kickin', so here's a proper update about what's been going on with me. I do feel great most days, and with Halloween in season around the US, it makes me very happy. As far as stroke recovery goes, my leg has a newly made brace and my walking in general has greatly improved the past few months. I really don't roll my left foot anymore, in other words, my foot can go flat instead of landing on the ankle and possibly causing injury.
My arm is still mostly nothing but a couple weeks back I was able to move my shoulder again so there's hope. I also got a home electrical stimulation device so I give my arm and hand a jolt for an hour everyday. With time, I feel confident i'll recover.
A great help with my recovery has been the amazing @dagdasgoddess , a fellow young stroke survivor who has been watching out for me and offering encouragement every day for a couple months now, exactly when I needed it. Mentally, stroke recovery is pretty damn tough but most days I feel positive about it, with great thanks to her.
And now on to some business. Shortly before my stroke I was planning on celebrating the 10th anniversary of my blog (which would have been in December of last year, but I was still in the hospital, obviously...) And one of the things I was going to do was photograph and review all the smt demon figures I have, using my special diorama table. I got around to starting the project a couple weeks before the stroke, naturally starting with the Leonard figure. Here's one of the pics:
I also made something of an anniversary banner, just because, I guess:
I also want to talk about some milestones reached, starting with some follower counts. By December last year I finally surpassed 2k followers, so thank you so very much. This is after Kanekos Crib Notes quickly dwarfed my own blog followers shortly after its establishment in like 2014. But now my own blog is even ahead of kcn, as undoubtedly its current annual schedule limits its growth and reach. (But hey, it's almost October, aka KCN MONTH)
The last milestone is above: my Stealing Knowledge blogger has reached half a million views! Unbelievable, thanks for reading and sharing over the years! Identity crisis part 3 remains the most viewed, with over 50k on its own.
Finally, I want to talk about the future. Another 10th anniversary plan was to try and monetize the blog somehow, probably via a Patreon for new articles and such and many other ideas, maybe even doing YouTube videos to answer asks instead of them being all text. I have lots of other ideas too, but they'll have to wait until my arm works again. So instead of monetizing the future, for now I'm just going to ask y'all kindly to chip in for the blog's past. I'm amazed at how much activity the blog still generates from--let's call it "legacy content".
To that end, I have set myself up a kofi account where you can show your appreciation for that "legacy", kuwabara, kuwabara, if you'd like. All money earned will go towards paying down bills accrued during my recovery, like my hyperbaric treatments. In perfect honesty, it's been around 3000 US dollars so far. Don't feel obligated to contribute and thank you all for still sticking around with me despite my relative inactivity. And if course, continue keeping @sorenblr busy if you wish.
I would also not expect my own recovery before next year, that's just stroke for you. Thank you all!!!!!
p.s. I was featured as a stroke survivor again on another therapy facebook post:
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I Promise, I'll never hurt you.
Itadori Yuji x Reader 2/3
part: 1, 3
Description: Your a Jujutsu sorcerer who can manipulate memories and emotions. Its a curse that has been placed upon you, where no matter what the emotions of others has been placed upon you. There is an obvious condition to this tremendous power, however. Yuji, being a vessel is pretty immune to all things that may tamper his soul… could this be a match made in heaven?
Genre: Friends to Lovers. Short story
warnings: Body Talk (female x reader)
A/N: Hey guys thank you SO MUCH for the love on my last post for this and im so sorry that I've been SO inactive. But I've been moving recently and will be moving again in the next 3 weeks! wish me luck as I try to find some time to write as much as possible.
oh! before I forget.... I got married! To a Handsome guy who would move mountains for me. We'll call him Yhervi for now
Don't forget to reblog!
You were no stranger to a guy paying you extra attention, in contrast, you enjoyed it. But it being a fellow student at Jujustsu High, made you uneasy. Sure, he was an underclassmen and it meant you could boast about being a students favorite senpai. But you weren’t a normal schoolgirl, not some person who could hang out with the other cursed users, like the elders once said- ‘until you control yourself, you may as well be a danger to others.’ How long ago was that?
Never mind, you had more important things to think about, like a certain underclassmen who was attached to your hip, and fed you compliments when you least expected them.
After training, he’d ask you to go out to lunch with him, and sit and talk. Your leg would bounce nervously, not used to being around someone this long. You had relationships before, but once you realized that they were all ending the same way because they’re normal humans, blessed with the ignorance of curses, you stopped trying. Sure you slept with someone every now and then at your university, but you never did more than that. Not like it lasted that long anyway, or that you enjoyed it so much that you’d do it again.
This was the second time you had left the school grounds with Yuji. He beamed at you when you said yes, and when it got silent between you two, that’s when he’d compliment you, “you’re so pretty (y/n), I’m sure lots of people tell you that.” Sometimes you’d wake up early for a run, and when you reached the field, there was Yuji, waiting, a tired look on his face. You didn’t know how he knew, but he did and there he was, waving energetically when your eyes met. He was much faster than you, but he made you giggle whenever he passed you with a goofy remark. “Say! You’re pretty fast, you finally finished that lap after my third!” He’d joke sarcastically.
No one was as athletically gifted as Yuji.
You had turned him down on other casual hangouts at first, you were afraid that he’d be affected by you. But then he kept insisting and there were only so many excuses you could come up with, so you guessed it was alright after some time. It wasn’t like you avoided people, you just wanted to do what was right for others. And the more you indulged in his little requests to see new attractions in Tokyo, the more you felt your self sinking in a thick pool of sand. He was always excited and always included you in his excitement, he listened to all the things you’d inform him about. The things you learned when you first came.
It was like you were the only person next to him, when he walked, people cleared the way for his tall statue and boyish charm. You didn’t miss the staring and jealous glares. Itadori Yuji was more than than just handsome. And you’d be deceiving yourself if you said he didn’t have a perfect body. You walked through the city together as the sun started setting, and when you passed by a train station, you grabbed his waist innocently to prevent you two being separated. Yuji may know where he is, but he’d still get lost in the sea of people, you knew this because he had told you. You found it deliciously cute. How foolish of you to grab him so possessively, you were guiding him through the people, but all the same your head was swarming with images of that could be hiding under his shirt.
His baggy choice of clothes on this casual outing, depraving you of any imagination before hand. But now, you were drinking him in, the way his arm held onto you by your shoulders. You started to wondered when you had gotten so close to each other. You swore he had pulled you in closer, and you the sinking feeling pulled you down faster. There was a warning you usually followed that was being drowned out by the vibrations of yuji’s energy. It was a dangerously catchy beat, almost sounded like a mix of techno and pop…..
You made it through, quickly unwrapping yourself as your cheeks grew hot, a bad habit, pulling away from others, he linked his arm with yours with a wolfish grin. You stared at him, confused as to how someone could be so naturally sweet. How could you remember you were cursed when he looked at you like that, the sun was setting but when he smiled at you like that, you could feel your cheeks being sunburned. ‘God damnit’.
The two of you were like a pair of walking magnets, you always found yourself someway, somehow linked together.
So while you walked back to your parking spot, which was ridiculously far, you walked together with your arm tucked nicely in his.
After that, Yuji became more and more attached to you. Any time you weren’t on a mission, he found you. You swore he had some kind of tracking device on you. On your days off, you dedicated them to reading and catching up on shows that you meant to watch; now your days off consisted of a pink haired boy knocking on your door, begging you to take him somewhere new, or asked to watch some new ridiculous movie. And how could you say no to a face like that?
The sinking feeling you were desperately fighting was reaching you at your hips. You could no longer pull your feet out to try and fight it.
. ˚ · • . ° .
He had successfully been able to pull you out of your isolation cocoon. He saw the way Maki smirked at him, he had assumed it was a thank you, for pulling you out of your selfless endeavor. At least you weren’t alone. And Yuji wasn’t complaining, you were so fun to be around, he felt at ease around you. So on an afternoon that you had made it to Jujustu tech high after a mission, he treated you to dinner in the common space. Where he couldn’t help but say, “Your the best company to have, (y/n)-senpai!” You flushed proudly, you could get used to hearing that~
And when he asked you to take him to Tokyo Tower the next day, the main attraction he had hoped to see one day in his outskirt town, you jokingly declined, until he begged. Yes- ‘begged’ on his knees, gripping your legs, and at the time he thought it was funny, until he breathed in your scent and it made his head swoon. He brushed it off when you laughed and pushed his head, “Ok! You can count on me! Now get off.” He did so eagerly, a second longer and he would have lost it.
So what, so what he thought you smelled nice and looked so pretty in your uniform, that you always looked so pretty, so approachable. Many individuals stopped you for directions, especially tourists, maybe it was because of your americanized style? He wouldn’t dwell on it too long, it did things to him. He thought it was your curse building on his feeling of friendship. What he didn’t know was that your curse wasn’t that interested in Yuji, like it wasn’t affecting him………..
The leggings you wore with those cute oversized shirts that you tuck in the back in your bra to accentuate your figure. Showing off your toned legs from training and your curves ever so evident for everyone to see in the warming spring. Your hair pulled back in a slicked way to round out you face and make you look younger. He gave you a closed eyed grin, not able to keep looking at you, he’d burst in to flames if he did. You were attractive, so what, he wouldn’t make you uncomfortable. You were too precious.
But you were too focused on his own body to think of the possibility of him doing the same. And so what, he was attractive, you held no shame. He deserved the attention.
Your style was americanized, maybe that was why tourists found you so approachable, asking for directions. Especially the Americans, and they’d rejoice when they heard you reply in English to their butchered Japanese. He liked how easy it came to you to help others. And he thanked you internally for giving him your time as well. Traveling on the train wasn’t everyone’s cup of tea.
You took him to Tokyo Tower and guided him through it, the whole reason it was so famous, the history to it and taking him to the main deck, and when you brought him up to the top deck, pointing to all the places you knew. He noticed the goosebumps on your skin since you had no sleeves and he shed his oversized coat on you, wordesly placing it on your shoulders. You didn’t ignore the sweet gesture, you just smiled at him as he leaned forward on the railing with you and continued to point to places and ask you what they were. Thanks to the clear skies on the spring afternoon, you noticed that Mount Fiji was in view and pointed to it for him.
He was mesmerized, and watched the entire city in silence, taking it in, he pressed his shoulder against yours, and you didn’t move. Not wanting to break the blissful moment with Itadori Yuji. Watching the clouds move and taking in the breeze that carried both of your scents.
You both didn’t want to move before it was time, but the breeze got stronger as the afternoon sun begin its descent. You both made your way down the crazy long tower, and headed to Shiodome, where there was an “Italian town” by Hama-rikyu Gardens you knew he’d love. And he had.
For the first time in a long time, you received a call from Satoru-san, and when you looked down to your phone, you hadn’t realize the time. ‘Oh shit, I’m gonna hear it now.’
G:
“Why haven’t you come back? Did you at least go out with another second year?”
Y/n:
“I actually gave Yuji a tour of Tokyo Tower, sorry, I hadn’t looked at the time.”
G:
“Hm, okay, tell him I say hi. Have fun, let me know when you get to your dorm.”
He had ended the call cheerfully, ‘what the hell.’ Yuji was watching you attentively, “was that Gojo-sensi?” He asked softly, you nodded. “He wanted to know when I was coming home.” Yuji took his phone out to look at the time and hissed when he saw it said 10:46.
“Oh gosh, I hadn’t realized the time, we should probably get back.” You giggled and waved your hand to relax him, “Were both free tomorrow, he wasn’t telling me to go home, just checking in. He said to tell you Hi, actually.” He grinned and agreed there was no harm. And with that you both walked the combed gardens while finding your way. The night was peaceful, you found your arms linked together again, how? You had no idea, but they were, and you weren’t going to pull away if he didn’t.
“What was America like?” He asked as you sat at a bench together. You had convinced him that taking the subway later would be calmer. He didn’t protest to more time with you. You hummed and clicked your tongue on the top of the roof of your mouth while you thought. “It was suffocating sometimes, they hold so many useless ideals unlike Japan. But I do miss it sometimes, the language, the music, the dumb class clowns.” You had picked up on the cultural difference between Japan and America about a month in. America had so many useless laws and ideals, Japan was much more comfortable, but you’d be lying if you said that you didn’t miss certain things. Japan had a way of slowly reminding you that you yourself were a foreigner, like with the traditional Japanese names and writing characters, you still struggled with them.
He noticed it too when you sometimes refrained from saying Megumi’s full name, addressing him as ‘gumi’, instead. He was jealous for not having a nickname. But he pushed it down, deep down. “Do you ever think about, I don’t know, going back?” You leaned against him, shoulder to shoulder, delighted to feel him lean in too. “Sometimes, but then I remember, there’s nothing or anyone waiting for me. I like the family I have here better.” His heart fluttered to hear you say family, did that include him too?
You both spoke of your childhoods, it was peaceful, engulfing the two of you in a blissful stop, where everything else was secondary to the person sitting next to you. It wasn’t long until you stood and stretched with his much too big jacket on your frame, announcing you were gonna head back. He flushed, you were still wearing it, and it was adorable, his heart pounding. He might be in some trouble after all. He tried to build up the courage to grab you hand, but chickened out to link your arms once again, as he had done the whole day. He smiled softly when you pulled him closer and leaned your head on his upper arm. He might ask for more one day, but this would suffice if you never wanted him the way he did, ‘wait, what?’ He thought. He was definitely in trouble.
You both walked and waited for the subway, to get to the outskirts of the your school. These were the quiet moments he missed, he didn’t have them anymore now that Sukuna was in the way and always pitched in to his thoughts. Something he just placed to together he hadn’t heard from Sukuna all day……
His huge jacket and the quiet lulling swaying of the train was making you sleepy, something you hadn’t been able to achieve until Yuji began consuming your thoughts. You wondered how long this fantasy would last until your curse would force you to loose this ray of sunshine in your life.
‘Maybe i’ll be little selfish for a while longer’. You felt the sinking feeling continue to consume you, all the way up to your chest, your arms didn’t even move to claw yourself up.
You had fallen asleep too quickly to stop yourself, and Yuji grinned and chuckled as he wrapped an arm around you and leaned you against his shoulder, his heart beating too quickly to register his own tired state. Despite it being a little ways over midnight, he’d been asking so much of your time, he’d push through and give you this small moment of peace. He’d take care of you now.
You made it home and walked to your dorm, that he had walked you too on the 2nd years side.
“Goodnight, Yuji-san.” You said sweetly, he hummed and leaned forward, your eyes widening. It was like he had been asking for a goodnight kiss. Not knowing what else to do, not wanting to sink any further, you pulled him into a tight hug, instead. He sighed inwardly, he had been lulled into your adorable face by his sleepy mind, attempting to kiss you. But this was fine too. As you pulled away, dashing into you room, back against the door, your heart pounding. Something Yuji hadn’t glossed over when you had hugged him.
He couldn’t help the grin on his face as he leaned on to your door, arm of the door and felt your heartbeat and said, “Goodnight (y/n)-Senpai.” You didn’t hear him walk away for a few moments, heart pounding in your ears making you think he had.
But when he did, you fell on your butt, back still against the door. ’This is bad. REALLY bad’, you thought. After a few moments, you had to hold back a scream when your door knob turned and tried to fly open, only to be stopped by your back and head. “At-ti-ti-ti” you groaned while holding your head and moved out of the way, there stood Maki, face stoick as always, until she found you on the floor, with Yuji’s jacket still on, cheeks flushed all the way to your ears. She smirked. Walking over to your bed with a proud look. Sitting with legs crossed and leaned forward.
“Cougar”, she jabbed.
You knew you weren’t getting any sleep. You’d have to tell her every detail. Or else.
˚ · • . ° .
Though Itadori had taken you out another couple of times, and gotten more brazen, holding your hand when walking through the city and thru the last Tokyo attraction you’d both had been too, he also saw how much more flustered you’d become. You never pulled away, never stopped him when he hugged you, or put an arm around your shoulders. You just flushed and looked away, peeking over at him and quickly look away again. You realized that the others had also picked up on how you and Yuji were subconsciously flirting.
Panda had already teased you about it, which Yuji had noticed, but you huffed and took your leave for a shower. Panda then teased him about, “oii, Yuji~ what do you prefer? Boobs or butts!” He probably choked before he even picked. Panda snickering before patting his shoulder, “come on, don’t be shy~!” The smug grin on the cursed corpse edging Yuji to answer.
He thought deeply, he wouldn’t lie, he did like a plump, round “-butt.” His senpai huffed pervertedly, chuckling while patting on his lower classmen’s shoulders.
You had left and Yuji, would have lied if he said that he didn’t watch you walk away.
He’d wait for you, however long it takes. There was something there, and he’d wait. But for now, he’d focus on getting stronger.
So for the rest of the afternoon, He’d train,with Gojo….
-After a couple days. (You and Maki and Nobara were sitting in a park, with your speakers, exploring American music.)
During a training break where he sat on the floor, watching panda and Toge train now as Megumi went to get some drinks. He spaced out for a moment, thinking of you, and that sun dress you had worn a few days back, going for a food run, to which he invited himself too. The mini fridge wouldn’t stock itself. And besides, you weren’t really allowed to leave the grounds of the school on your own, due to your curse and all. But mostly because it was Gojo’s request, so you were totally okay with him tagging along.
He watched the way your skin, that was usually unexposed, drank up the sun from the early summer days. The way your legs glimmered, they looked so soft. He wondered what else was soft- His train of thought was thankfully stopped by the ringing of a phone next to him and to his surprise it wasn’t his own. When he glanced down, the caller ID was Nobara and he assumed the phone belonged to Megumi. But what he was greeted with, took him by surprise:
Y: Hey Nobara, Megumi’s in the bathroom-
N: (nobara speaking) Oh come on, between the three of us, you’re telling me you’re not getting any action? Even with Yuji floating around you like that?
He heard all three of you giggle. And he swore he was going to hang up, but the conversation kept peeking his interest. *especially since he heard his name….
N: ((y/n) speaking) It’s nothing like that, Itadori is better off keeping his distance. I’m the one being selfish. Besides, if we ever get to that point, I might never be able to look at him again if he’s affected by me.
You sighed and turned on some English music. It was clear that Nobara had either did this on purpose or butt dialed Megumi by an accident.
N: (Maki speaking) Don’t try and to act innocent you cougar, (y/n) is just afraid that he’ll either be the best experience she’s had in bed, or just the same as the rest.
Nobara tried to stifle her laugh, unsuccessfully. And at this moment, Yuji thought he felt guilty for listening, but he knew himself better than that.
N: ((y/n) speaking) MAKI! Don’t embarrass me like this! I’m only a year older than him! BESIDES, even if I did imagine something happening between us, at the end of the day, sooner or later, he’ll grow to resent me the more his body is exposed to my cursed energy.
You sighed, getting quiet again. Itadori felt his chest heaving, turning to make sure Megumi was no where near.
N: (Nobara speaking) Oh come on, Yuji is too soft to ever do something like that. You should know how he is, I don’t think he has a bone in his body with malice. He more of a walking airhead.
There was a pause, only the strange English music that Yuji was printing into the back of his mind to search up and add to your playlist he created. He never wanted to forget the next words that escape your mouth through the phone.
N: ((y/n) speaking) You’re right, I can’t change how I feel, and I can’t change the strange feeling that something bad will happen. I’m sure Maki will flick my forehead for this - there was a pair of chuckles - I’ll just be selfish for as long as I can and let him decide. I am still his favorite senpai~
With that- he hung up the phone call, his fluttering heart and burning ears under the warm sun not allowing him to to listen to another word, without exploding.
He placed the phone down and pulled out his own, rushing to the search engine on his own phone, writing down the few lyrics he understood in hopes of finding the song that would only serve to further drive his desires and hopes.
“Sunburn by The LivingTombstone.” He murmured as he was successful in finding it. His friend passed him a water bottle, silent as he sat down. Yuji- still flustered by everything he had heard slowly grasped it. “Ah, thanks a lot Megumi.” Though Yuji felt that he was thanking his friend for more than the water bottle that he guzzled down.
Megumi thought Yuji had lost his mind when he threw the rest of the water he didn’t drink on top of his head, it soaked through his hair and trickled down his temple to his chin.
˚ · • . ° .
By the end of the day, he had memorized the strange tune from the song that he had no idea what they were saying. He also hadn’t heard the song playing on your speaker, or phone when the two of you were together. His eyebrows knitted together as he laid in bed staring at the song, the wonderful graphics of the animated music video. After it played for about the 7th time, he looked up the lyrics translated in Japanese and his heart started swooning.
Turning to lay on his toned chest, digging his face in his pillow as he shut his eyes. Highschool crushes were the worst, they had a way of pulling the strangest reactions from you, the only thing in the world that made Yuji feel like he had to hold on to this one thing with the strongest grip in the world. So he wouldn’t loose you like he had lost so many others, he tried his best to ignore Sukuna and his quips about how he pursuit was futile. How you’d grow tired of his insistence sooner or later.
All his focus was on the lyrics that caught his attention, the words swirling around and pulling his heart with it.
“I’m losing myself. You smile, and I get sunburn.”
He hoped that this song was recently added to your playlist after meeting him. He prayed to whoever was listening, that this was how you felt about him, and only him.
You were no stranger to a guy paying you extra attention, in contrast, you enjoyed it. But it being a fellow student at Jujustsu High, made you uneasy. Sure, he was an underclassmen and it meant you could boast about being a students favorite senpai. But you weren’t a normal schoolgirl, not some person who could hang out with the other cursed users, like the elders once said- ‘until you control yourself, you may as well be a danger to others.’ How long ago was that?
Never mind, you had more important things to think about, like a certain underclassmen who was attached to your hip, and fed you compliments when you least expected them.
After training, he’d ask you to go out to lunch with him, and sit and talk. Your leg would bounce nervously, not used to being around someone this long. You had relationships before, but once you realized that they were all ending the same way because they’re normal humans, blessed with the ignorance of curses, you stopped trying. Sure you slept with someone every now and then at your university, but you never did more than that. Not like it lasted that long anyway, or that you enjoyed it so much that you’d do it again.
This was the second time you had left the school grounds with Yuji. He beamed at you when you said yes, and when it got silent between you two, that’s when he’d compliment you, “you’re so pretty (y/n), I’m sure lots of people tell you that.” Sometimes you’d wake up early for a run, and when you reached the field, there was Yuji, waiting, a tired look on his face. You didn’t know how he knew, but he did and there he was, waving energetically when your eyes met. He was much faster than you, but he made you giggle whenever he passed you with a goofy remark. “Say! You’re pretty fast, you finally finished that lap after my third!” He’d joke sarcastically.
No one was as athletically gifted as Yuji.
You had turned him down on other casual hangouts at first, you were afraid that he’d be affected by you. But then he kept insisting and there were only so many excuses you could come up with, so you guessed it was alright after some time. It wasn’t like you avoided people, you just wanted to do what was right for others. And the more you indulged in his little requests to see new attractions in Tokyo, the more you felt your self sinking in a thick pool of sand. He was always excited and always included you in his excitement, he listened to all the things you’d inform him about. The things you learned when you first came.
It was like you were the only person next to him, when he walked, people cleared the way for his tall statue and boyish charm. You didn’t miss the staring and jealous glares. Itadori Yuji was more than than just handsome. And you’d be deceiving yourself if you said he didn’t have a perfect body. You walked through the city together as the sun started setting, and when you passed by a train station, you grabbed his waist innocently to prevent you two being separated. Yuji may know where he is, but he’d still get lost in the sea of people, you knew this because he had told you. You found it deliciously cute. How foolish of you to grab him so possessively, you were guiding him through the people, but all the same your head was swarming with images of that could be hiding under his shirt.
His baggy choice of clothes on this casual outing, depraving you of any imagination before hand. But now, you were drinking him in, the way his arm held onto you by your shoulders. You started to wondered when you had gotten so close to each other. You swore he had pulled you in closer, and you the sinking feeling pulled you down faster. There was a warning you usually followed that was being drowned out by the vibrations of yuji’s energy. It was a dangerously catchy beat, almost sounded like a mix of techno and pop…..
You made it through, quickly unwrapping yourself as your cheeks grew hot, a bad habit, pulling away from others, he linked his arm with yours with a wolfish grin. You stared at him, confused as to how someone could be so naturally sweet. How could you remember you were cursed when he looked at you like that, the sun was setting but when he smiled at you like that, you could feel your cheeks being sunburned. ‘God damnit’.
The two of you were like a pair of walking magnets, you always found yourself someway, somehow linked together.
So while you walked back to your parking spot, which was ridiculously far, you walked together with your arm tucked nicely in his.
After that, Yuji became more and more attached to you. Any time you weren’t on a mission, he found you. You swore he had some kind of tracking device on you. On your days off, you dedicated them to reading and catching up on shows that you meant to watch; now your days off consisted of a pink haired boy knocking on your door, begging you to take him somewhere new, or asked to watch some new ridiculous movie. And how could you say no to a face like that?
The sinking feeling you were desperately fighting was reaching you at your hips. You could no longer pull your feet out to try and fight it.
. ˚ · • . ° .
He had successfully been able to pull you out of your isolation cocoon. He saw the way Maki smirked at him, he had assumed it was a thank you, for pulling you out of your selfless endeavor. At least you weren’t alone. And Yuji wasn’t complaining, you were so fun to be around, he felt at ease around you. So on an afternoon that you had made it to Jujustu tech high after a mission, he treated you to dinner in the common space. Where he couldn’t help but say, “Your the best company to have, (y/n)-senpai!” You flushed proudly, you could get used to hearing that~
And when he asked you to take him to Tokyo Tower the next day, the main attraction he had hoped to see one day in his outskirt town, you jokingly declined, until he begged. Yes- ‘begged’ on his knees, gripping your legs, and at the time he thought it was funny, until he breathed in your scent and it made his head swoon. He brushed it off when you laughed and pushed his head, “Ok! You can count on me! Now get off.” He did so eagerly, a second longer and he would have lost it.
So what, so what he thought you smelled nice and looked so pretty in your uniform, that you always looked so pretty, so approachable. Many individuals stopped you for directions, especially tourists, maybe it was because of your americanized style? He wouldn’t dwell on it too long, it did things to him. He thought it was your curse building on his feeling of friendship. What he didn’t know was that your curse wasn’t that interested in Yuji, like it wasn’t affecting him………..
The leggings you wore with those cute oversized shirts that you tuck in the back in your bra to accentuate your figure. Showing off your toned legs from training and your curves ever so evident for everyone to see in the warming spring. Your hair pulled back in a slicked way to round out you face and make you look younger. He gave you a closed eyed grin, not able to keep looking at you, he’d burst in to flames if he did. You were attractive, so what, he wouldn’t make you uncomfortable. You were too precious.
But you were too focused on his own body to think of the possibility of him doing the same. And so what, he was attractive, you held no shame. He deserved the attention.
Your style was americanized, maybe that was why tourists found you so approachable, asking for directions. Especially the Americans, and they’d rejoice when they heard you reply in English to their butchered Japanese. He liked how easy it came to you to help others. And he thanked you internally for giving him your time as well. Traveling on the train wasn’t everyone’s cup of tea.
You took him to Tokyo Tower and guided him through it, the whole reason it was so famous, the history to it and taking him to the main deck, and when you brought him up to the top deck, pointing to all the places you knew. He noticed the goosebumps on your skin since you had no sleeves and he shed his oversized coat on you, wordesly placing it on your shoulders. You didn’t ignore the sweet gesture, you just smiled at him as he leaned forward on the railing with you and continued to point to places and ask you what they were. Thanks to the clear skies on the spring afternoon, you noticed that Mount Fiji was in view and pointed to it for him.
He was mesmerized, and watched the entire city in silence, taking it in, he pressed his shoulder against yours, and you didn’t move. Not wanting to break the blissful moment with Itadori Yuji. Watching the clouds move and taking in the breeze that carried both of your scents.
You both didn’t want to move before it was time, but the breeze got stronger as the afternoon sun begin its descent. You both made your way down the crazy long tower, and headed to Shiodome, where there was an “Italian town” by Hama-rikyu Gardens you knew he’d love. And he had.
For the first time in a long time, you received a call from Satoru-san, and when you looked down to your phone, you hadn’t realize the time. ‘Oh shit, I’m gonna hear it now.’
G:
“Why haven’t you come back? Did you at least go out with another second year?”
Y/n:
“I actually gave Yuji a tour of Tokyo Tower, sorry, I hadn’t looked at the time.”
G:
“Hm, okay, tell him I say hi. Have fun, let me know when you get to your dorm.”
He had ended the call cheerfully, ‘what the hell.’ Yuji was watching you attentively, “was that Gojo-sensi?” He asked softly, you nodded. “He wanted to know when I was coming home.” Yuji took his phone out to look at the time and hissed when he saw it said 10:46.
“Oh gosh, I hadn’t realized the time, we should probably get back.” You giggled and waved your hand to relax him, “Were both free tomorrow, he wasn’t telling me to go home, just checking in. He said to tell you Hi, actually.” He grinned and agreed there was no harm. And with that you both walked the combed gardens while finding your way. The night was peaceful, you found your arms linked together again, how? You had no idea, but they were, and you weren’t going to pull away if he didn’t.
“What was America like?” He asked as you sat at a bench together. You had convinced him that taking the subway later would be calmer. He didn’t protest to more time with you. You hummed and clicked your tongue on the top of the roof of your mouth while you thought. “It was suffocating sometimes, they hold so many useless ideals unlike Japan. But I do miss it sometimes, the language, the music, the dumb class clowns.” You had picked up on the cultural difference between Japan and America about a month in. America had so many useless laws and ideals, Japan was much more comfortable, but you’d be lying if you said that you didn’t miss certain things. Japan had a way of slowly reminding you that you yourself were a foreigner, like with the traditional Japanese names and writing characters, you still struggled with them.
He noticed it too when you sometimes refrained from saying Megumi’s full name, addressing him as ‘gumi’, instead. He was jealous for not having a nickname. But he pushed it down, deep down. “Do you ever think about, I don’t know, going back?” You leaned against him, shoulder to shoulder, delighted to feel him lean in too. “Sometimes, but then I remember, there’s nothing or anyone waiting for me. I like the family I have here better.” His heart fluttered to hear you say family, did that include him too?
You both spoke of your childhoods, it was peaceful, engulfing the two of you in a blissful stop, where everything else was secondary to the person sitting next to you. It wasn’t long until you stood and stretched with his much too big jacket on your frame, announcing you were gonna head back. He flushed, you were still wearing it, and it was adorable, his heart pounding. He might be in some trouble after all. He tried to build up the courage to grab you hand, but chickened out to link your arms once again, as he had done the whole day. He smiled softly when you pulled him closer and leaned your head on his upper arm. He might ask for more one day, but this would suffice if you never wanted him the way he did, ‘wait, what?’ He thought. He was definitely in trouble.
You both walked and waited for the subway, to get to the outskirts of the your school. These were the quiet moments he missed, he didn’t have them anymore now that Sukuna was in the way and always pitched in to his thoughts. Something he just placed to together he hadn’t heard from Sukuna all day……
His huge jacket and the quiet lulling swaying of the train was making you sleepy, something you hadn’t been able to achieve until Yuji began consuming your thoughts. You wondered how long this fantasy would last until your curse would force you to loose this ray of sunshine in your life.
‘Maybe i’ll be little selfish for a while longer’. You felt the sinking feeling continue to consume you, all the way up to your chest, your arms didn’t even move to claw yourself up.
You had fallen asleep too quickly to stop yourself, and Yuji grinned and chuckled as he wrapped an arm around you and leaned you against his shoulder, his heart beating too quickly to register his own tired state. Despite it being a little ways over midnight, he’d been asking so much of your time, he’d push through and give you this small moment of peace. He’d take care of you now.
You made it home and walked to your dorm, that he had walked you too on the 2nd years side.
“Goodnight, Yuji-san.” You said sweetly, he hummed and leaned forward, your eyes widening. It was like he had been asking for a goodnight kiss. Not knowing what else to do, not wanting to sink any further, you pulled him into a tight hug, instead. He sighed inwardly, he had been lulled into your adorable face by his sleepy mind, attempting to kiss you. But this was fine too. As you pulled away, dashing into you room, back against the door, your heart pounding. Something Yuji hadn’t glossed over when you had hugged him.
He couldn’t help the grin on his face as he leaned on to your door, arm of the door and felt your heartbeat and said, “Goodnight (y/n)-Senpai.” You didn’t hear him walk away for a few moments, heart pounding in your ears making you think he had.
But when he did, you fell on your butt, back still against the door. ’This is bad. REALLY bad’, you thought. After a few moments, you had to hold back a scream when your door knob turned and tried to fly open, only to be stopped by your back and head. “At-ti-ti-ti” you groaned while holding your head and moved out of the way, there stood Maki, face stoick as always, until she found you on the floor, with Yuji’s jacket still on, cheeks flushed all the way to your ears. She smirked. Walking over to your bed with a proud look. Sitting with legs crossed and leaned forward.
“Cougar”, she jabbed.
You knew you weren’t getting any sleep. You’d have to tell her every detail. Or else.
.˚ · • . ° .
Though Itadori had taken you out another couple of times, and gotten more brazen, holding your hand when walking through the city and thru the last Tokyo attraction you’d both had been too, he also saw how much more flustered you’d become. You never pulled away, never stopped him when he hugged you, or put an arm around your shoulders. You just flushed and looked away, peeking over at him and quickly look away again. You realized that the others had also picked up on how you and Yuji were subconsciously flirting.
Panda had already teased you about it, which Yuji had noticed, but you huffed and took your leave for a shower. Panda then teased him about, “oii, Yuji~ what do you prefer? Boobs or butts!” He probably choked before he even picked. Panda snickering before patting his shoulder, “come on, don’t be shy~!” The smug grin on the cursed corpse edging Yuji to answer.
He thought deeply, he wouldn’t lie, he did like a plump, round “-butt.” His senpai huffed pervertedly, chuckling while patting on his lower classmen’s shoulders.
You had left and Yuji, would have lied if he said that he didn’t watch you walk away.
He’d wait for you, however long it takes. There was something there, and he’d wait. But for now, he’d focus on getting stronger.
So for the rest of the afternoon, He’d train,with Gojo….
-After a couple days. (You and Maki and Nobara were sitting in a park, with your speakers, exploring American music.)
During a training break where he sat on the floor, watching panda and Toge train now as Megumi went to get some drinks. He spaced out for a moment, thinking of you, and that sun dress you had worn a few days back, going for a food run, to which he invited himself too. The mini fridge wouldn’t stock itself. And besides, you weren’t really allowed to leave the grounds of the school on your own, due to your curse and all. But mostly because it was Gojo’s request, so you were totally okay with him tagging along.
He watched the way your skin, that was usually unexposed, drank up the sun from the early summer days. The way your legs glimmered, they looked so soft. He wondered what else was soft- His train of thought was thankfully stopped by the ringing of a phone next to him and to his surprise it wasn’t his own. When he glanced down, the caller ID was Nobara and he assumed the phone belonged to Megumi. But what he was greeted with, took him by surprise:
Y: Hey Nobara, Megumi’s in the bathroom-
N: (nobara speaking) Oh come on, between the three of us, you’re telling me you’re not getting any action? Even with Yuji floating around you like that?
He heard all three of you giggle. And he swore he was going to hang up, but the conversation kept peeking his interest. *especially since he heard his name….
N: ((y/n) speaking) It’s nothing like that, Itadori is better off keeping his distance. I’m the one being selfish. Besides, if we ever get to that point, I might never be able to look at him again if he’s affected by me.
You sighed and turned on some English music. It was clear that Nobara had either did this on purpose or butt dialed Megumi by an accident.
N: (Maki speaking) Don’t try and to act innocent you cougar, (y/n) is just afraid that he’ll either be the best experience she’s had in bed, or just the same as the rest.
Nobara tried to stifle her laugh, unsuccessfully. And at this moment, Yuji thought he felt guilty for listening, but he knew himself better than that.
N: ((y/n) speaking) MAKI! Don’t embarrass me like this! I’m only a year older than him! BESIDES, even if I did imagine something happening between us, at the end of the day, sooner or later, he’ll grow to resent me the more his body is exposed to my cursed energy.
You sighed, getting quiet again. Itadori felt his chest heaving, turning to make sure Megumi was no where near.
N: (Nobara speaking) Oh come on, Yuji is too soft to ever do something like that. You should know how he is, I don’t think he has a bone in his body with malice. He more of a walking airhead.
There was a pause, only the strange English music that Yuji was printing into the back of his mind to search up and add to your playlist he created. He never wanted to forget the next words that escape your mouth through the phone.
N: ((y/n) speaking) You’re right, I can’t change how I feel, and I can’t change the strange feeling that something bad will happen. I’m sure Maki will flick my forehead for this - there was a pair of chuckles - I’ll just be selfish for as long as I can and let him decide. I am still his favorite senpai~
With that- he hung up the phone call, his fluttering heart and burning ears under the warm sun not allowing him to to listen to another word, without exploding.
He placed the phone down and pulled out his own, rushing to the search engine on his own phone, writing down the few lyrics he understood in hopes of finding the song that would only serve to further drive his desires and hopes.
“Sunburn by The LivingTombstone.” He murmured as he was successful in finding it. His friend passed him a water bottle, silent as he sat down. Yuji- still flustered by everything he had heard slowly grasped it. “Ah, thanks a lot Megumi.” Though Yuji felt that he was thanking his friend for more than the water bottle that he guzzled down.
Megumi thought Yuji had lost his mind when he threw the rest of the water he didn’t drink on top of his head, it soaked through his hair and trickled down his temple to his chin.
.˚ · • . ° .
By the end of the day, he had memorized the strange tune from the song that he had no idea what they were saying. He also hadn’t heard the song playing on your speaker, or phone when the two of you were together. His eyebrows knitted together as he laid in bed staring at the song, the wonderful graphics of the animated music video. After it played for about the 7th time, he looked up the lyrics translated in Japanese and his heart started swooning.
Turning to lay on his toned chest, digging his face in his pillow as he shut his eyes. Highschool crushes were the worst, they had a way of pulling the strangest reactions from you, the only thing in the world that made Yuji feel like he had to hold on to this one thing with the strongest grip in the world. So he wouldn’t loose you like he had lost so many others, he tried his best to ignore Sukuna and his quips about how he pursuit was futile. How you’d grow tired of his insistence sooner or later.
All his focus was on the lyrics that caught his attention, the words swirling around and pulling his heart with it.
“I’m losing myself. You smile, and I get sunburn.”
He hoped that this song was recently added to your playlist after meeting him. He prayed to whoever was listening, that this was how you felt about him, and only him.
#my art#doodles art#itadori yuji headcanons#yuji x reader#yuji itadori#itadori yuji#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen fluff#x reader#my fanfic#fan fiction#fanfiction#megumi fushiguro#nobara kugisaki#maki zenin#gojo saturo#sukuna ryomen#doodles artz#doodles writes#yuji x you
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Don't let me go…【part2】
I won't let you go！
Well… hi all！
Firstly, I hope everyone is staying safe and healthy out there！🙏
And secondly, as you guys know, i've been quiet for a while. I had to deal with some of my real life problems… albeit unintentionally… And it was a period that seriously hurt me emotionally. So if you remember, when I was at the beginning of everything, I posted an art about it, also mentioned that I will share the rest of that art depending on the situation. And according to this result, it would end as a good or bad ending…
So today, this problem finally came to a conclusion！
What do you see when you look at these pieces? It feels like a bit of a bad ending, right!? But it's not！Yes, the result is really the good ending one！！！I'm just happy to be back with good news after such a long wait！And guys, half of these results are thanks to you, i know！'Cause you all sent so many positive comments and wishes that things turned out well (y'know I have some superstitions like good wishes)！So I can't thank each and every one of you enough！
I really thought for a moment that I had reached the end of the road… And I don't know if I can use the right words about my feelings during this period… That's why i'm not even going to start that "feelings" part. Just… I guess I'm a little old-fashioned. I mean I can't get used to the changes easily. Ofcourse one day I'll say that I'm done！(I can't draw these two boys until i die). But I can only accept this if it is a situation under my control. And since I don't feel like saying I'm done yet, this just damaged my emotional state indescribably. Many days when I was quiet and inactive, I kept telling myself "be patient, be strong, be patient, be strong" and I didn't tell anyone how hard it was for me because didn't want to bother any of you with my *constant* emotional breakdowns. So, special thanks to the few people who didn't turn down my request for help to avoid a panic attack (they know themselves)！
Honestly, this problem is about a topic I'm uncomfortable talking about. That's why I won't talk too much about it. (But even so, I was going to tell you all what this is about, if this had ended with a bad ending. Because if i had to leave i think you guys have the right to know why…) So for now, it's just enough to know that this is about a serious legal issue. I may be just a simple fanartist that you all see here but there are some serious issues going on in my real life and can't have fun with. And it was an issue that would hinder my entire artist career, not just about my fanarts. That's why I asked all of you for help (normally i hate asking for help but…) And the bad ending one is still in my documents, but i will never share this. Because I'm still afraid of something and maybe this will cause things to go bad in the future, idk… But mmh for those who are still wondering, I can explain a little, i guess. So it was the same beginning but a different ending, something like Sasuke leaving without looking back, and he couldn't even hear Naruto's voice and what he was saying behind his back… like an unstoppable farewell…… So I still feel lucky that I didn't have to post this one！
But, after this period that I lived for almost two months, I cannot say that everything is over now… unfortunately. 'Cause from now on it seems like another period awaits me. A period when I will be much busier and not even have time to talk much… But i'm not complaining, because I can still stay around. So i haven't planned it yet but i will try to prepare a monthly schedule for myself. And nothing is finalized but for now it looks like I can only spend two weeks a month on fanarts/commissions. Sorry in advance for being less active from now on！
But HEY i'm still happy！！！
I'm happy to be able to continue what I love to do, happy to be able to stay here with you all and happy that I don't have to leave my accounts. So, endless thanks to everyone who spoke up or stayed silent but never stopped supporting me！I never asked you to do, but y'all just don't know how much strength you give me with your words and support！
Hope the future brings more fun and happiness to all of us！Let's have fun doing the things we love！And don't also forget to take care of yourself！！
(Uhm… Ok I won't be writing such long articles for a long time, don't worry, I won't have time for that ^^;！So just, thank you if you've read this far) ！
See you guys around！❤️❤️
#narusasu#naruto#sasuke#Naruto Uzumaki#Sasuke Uchiha#sns#Don't let me go... I won't let you go!#Yes it's raining but they are with each other#So nothing to worry about now#Good Ending#Thank you to everyone who has been patient with me and never stops supporting!#my otp#my art
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INTRODUCING WHAT’S DONE IN THE DARK, 010 /,
( PROCESS ONE, ) IT WAS A GHOST STORY, wasn’t it? It’s like hearing scratching inside the walls when you’re home alone. If you give it attention then you have to give it details. Like: what colour was the wallpaper when your father left? What colour is your father’s hair? Do you have a father?
( PROCESS TWO, ) A FILE IS SENT TO THE FBI’S HEAD OFFICE, MOST NOTABLY UNIT CHIEF VINCENT NOLAN, IT’S ENCRYPTED AND TAKES FIVE DAYS TO TRANSLATE. This is the part of the story where you can stop reading at any time. This is the rabbit hole, remember? It takes all those youthful souls and twists their necks until they’re misshapen husks. If you want to know what the files entail, continue. If you want to leave the game: press ESC.
( PROCESS THREE, ) RED EYE OPERATIONS, THEY CALL THEMSELVES, WERE ORIGINALLY THOUGHT TO BE HALLUCINATED, no witnesses, no solid accounts of being involved with the organization. Until now, of course. The file includes fourteen titles :///
A. CHIEN, ACTIVE. A. BREMOVYCH, INACTIVE. A. SYVASTOSLAV, ACTIVE. C. HUMMEL, INACTIVE. G. LAURIER, INACTIVE. M. LUO, ACTIVE. N. EL-KHOURY, ACTIVE. N. BYEON, ACTIVE. R. KOWALSKI, INACTIVE. R. ROCKWELL, ACTIVE. S. JUAREZ, INACTIVE. T. BORGES, ACTIVE. V. SILVA, ACTIVE. X. ALCARAZ, ACTIVE.
( PROCESS FOUR, ) EASIER SAID THAN DONE, AS IS ANYTHING, the rules reads as follows: for each name revealed ( difficult to do without help as none of these shadows hold records or paper trails ) this FBI reaper must give up one of his own. A name for a name! Red Eye’s capture ( or evasion of capture ) is at your fingertips! How willing are you to have something to trade? Our guess? Highly willing. After all, if it’s not one of your own, it’ll be one of your citizens. Those vigilantes can replace any wriggling worm of a member of government any day! The time to decide isn’t yours to take, either. This file will mutate within forty eight hours until it’s completely unmanageable and then we'll just take all names to the grave. Agents, intelligent officers, operatives, detectives, attorneys, and vigilantes alike. Happy picking!
SUMMARY : THE SNAKE DEN’S first play on the board. This will take both the government’s decision in dealing with the Snake Den or Red Eye. Which one is the bigger fish to fry? The Executioners will also be in the know due to a few media sources covering this update on the Snake Den, coupled with a few tarot cards being left around city hall. All with bloody smiley faces drawn on the backs of them. As for who gave the Snake Den this information? It was an anonymous source. Donated quite generously — mentioned something about cashing in a favour in a few weeks time in return. As usual, please react to this post once read.
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GUYS GUESS WHO'S BACK... 'YAY'
so uh idk why i come back on tumblr every couple months and make posts like this but i've basically ruined my account at this point haha perfectionist issues and i'm going to try to be honest with everyone of you guys because. idek at this point
i don't know how everyone's opinion of me is at this point, and it feels like i'm ruining it. i don't know if this is me now, if i kind of put up a front before, but why these posts seem different than the others on my blog is a mystery to me ^^'
maybe i'm just overthinking it, though?
well, my life is pretty shit. i don't really have any friends, except for a couple close ones who can somehow deal with me-- and, yeah. people at my school don't really like me, and i've fucked up a lot recently. this post sounds really depressing. sorry for that.
i don't know, i guess prior to the whole incident (moots, yk what i'm talking about) i always tried to put up a cheerful front. i had an idealized version of myself, and that was koi. and i did act like myself a lot around you guys, because i became comfortable with all of you and i felt accepted. i'm really grateful for what you all have done for me.
so, more about what's going on- basically, i'm just... not happy with myself, i guess. i wish i had more friends.
you know, my goal in life at one point was to be friends with everyone in my grade. that was more than a year ago. i guess that whole hope pretty much died out. but i do still try my very best, and this is turning into a ramble which i'm sorry for but i just want to get everything off of my chest.
i'll probably never use tumblr regularly again- but, who knows, shit changes.
the incident really affected me. after i was told about everything and learned about all of what happened, i was just... i don't know. i was told that it was that day that i began to eat less, act angrier, and all of that shit- and that went on for a couple weeks.
eventually, i tried to forget about it. i still think about every once in a while, though.
well, i'm starting to sound like a pessimist. i miss when i could be koi, the friendly, cheerful, happy person who had a bunch of friends that worried about him and asked if he was feeling okay.
i don't even know what's going on anymore. i feel fine, and then i go through short spikes of depression. or maybe i'm just a person that's sad all the time, but i choose to be ignorant. i'm really sorry that whoever reads this has to hear me vent and all that shit, but i'm just glad that i can say all of my feelings in the hopes that someone will read this.
so, let's talk about what's been going on since i've left- since i really feel like i should add some filler because of my long absensce '- -
well, i got a suit that kind of reminded me of haruchiyo sanzu from tokyo revengers (haha weeb things) and i look pretty hot in it, ngl- and, my family moved back to our house, which got remodeled. i've done a lot of drawing, too.
and, for context of the tokyo revengers comment earlier- i've been hyperfixating on it for so long. i love the series and the characters aaa
also, i started bakuman and black butler, and they're pretty good! i love the plot of bakuman so much!! (the death note team always makes amazing manga) i also got the first book of haikyuu from the library, because i've seen it referenced online so much and i haven't taken the time to check it out yet.
whew. i don't know, i guess saying all this makes me sound more human than just pixels on a screen. (but i'm actually 3 ducks in a trenchcoat) (i'm not funny)
i've had a lot of homework, so i've been pretty busy.
and i have to go eat dinner now, so i'll be leaving- but again, thank you guys for being my friends for so long. and, why are people still following me when my blog is inactive like- ????
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a gradum ad lumen - part 2 .
you guys can probably guess by now that i’m a more spontaneous author, so my activity will have it’s ups and downs, and I may just be inactive for months on end when i lack motivation / time to write. but with my high muse for this series so far and the release of season three for umbrella academy, i’m hoping to get out a good amount of writing for as long as i can. but anyway, chapter two!
___
Word count: 3.9k!
Warnings : general TMR TWS; blood, slight gore, disturbing ideas / images, and depicted injuries.
Pronouns used: they/them – gender-neutral.
Prompt(s) used: “Who knows. Maybe we’ve actually made it out of this hellhole after all.”
Pairing: TMR x GN!Reader.
Parts you may have missed : Part 1
A/N: I always forget to beta read my writing, so if parts don’t make sense, just ignore it. I typically do end up reading them after my pieces are posted, so I’ll likely get around to fixing any nonsensical bits the following week. I also apologize for the long and pretty bland chapter, I’m hoping things will be more eventful from here on out.
___
“Jeez, talk about a storm.”
You and Minho were spectating the harsh winds and rain from the safety of your room in the sporadic and rickety building you called the Homestead, watching as the unrelenting weather drenched anything the instant it touched it, the Gladers that were darting about the perfect example as they hastily went about gathering personal belongings and other things prone to being destroyed due to water damage to shelter in the Homestead. Newt was amongst them, the sight of the Keeper directing the traffic through the already muddy grass and whipping winds more than enough to entertain the two of you as you awaited your impromptu supper to finish cooling down.
Despite the later time that you and Minho had come back to the Glade, bringing the arrival of the unexpected storm with you, Frypan had managed to set aside a few bowls of still hot vegetable stew with freshly baked bread rolls that you were more than eager to devour the minute the soup cooled. In the meantime, you nodded in agreement with Minho’s comment, idly picking at a loose thread dangling from the hem of your nondescript shirt as the two of you continued to watch. You had dragged a stool up to the window, knowing that you’d be there a while if your running partner planned on staying by the window for the entirety of the rainstorm, and you were more than relieved that you had done so beforehand, even the thought of trying to stand for that long with your injured leg enough to make you shudder inwardly.
You and Newt had managed to find Clint just as he was throwing empty jars and bandages into a bin, which typically signified that he and Jack were about ready to retire for the evening, and have him run a quick but thorough check on your ankle after explaining what exactly had happened to the medic. Thankfully, after he rolled it experimentally, observed your elicited reactions, and asked you to rate the pain you felt when standing or attempting to walk on it, he confirmed Newt’s suspicions and said that the swelling would subside after a few days, the pain sure to follow suit as well. All you had to do was keep off it as much as possible, though, which put you in a bit of a bind; Clint had been sure to specify that “staying off it” included going out into the Maze until he cleared you again, the news making you deflate slightly. Luckily, you were still able to at least hobble around for short periods of time, which meant that you could pitch in with the Trackhoes and whatever tedious tasks Alby needed help with around the Glade for the time being, and you were more than content to do it – so long as you were helping in some manner.
After a few moments of the rain beating away at the roof overhead, the wind sweeping around it to form an uneven staccato, you finally managed to verbally respond to Minho, pulling your gaze away from the grey expanse of the sky to glance back at your steaming meals and back to the other Keeper as you spoke, “hopefully it’ll let up soon. Can’t have the Glade too wet with a new Greenie coming up tomorrow.”
You watched as he tipped his head toward you, nodding as he seemed to fully process your words.
“Oh yeah, poor slinthead. Almost forgot about that. You’re gonna be here to see him bawl his eyes out and then get his ass beat by Gally, you lucky duck.”
You stifled a laugh, shoving Minho’s shoulder playfully before shaking your head and stretching your arms out above you, practically able to feel the weariness and fatigue as it settled into every crevice of your bones from the day’s strenuous events.
“You’re gonna be here for the bonfire too, slinthead,” You replied as you got to your feet and awkwardly limped to the makeshift table tucked into the corner of your room and retrieving the two bowls and plate under Minho’s humoured gaze. He watched as you attempted to balance a bowl in each hand and the plate on your forearm, finding very quickly that the porcelain of them were heated almost searingly to the touch, which caused you to nearly up end them on the Runner before he snatched them out of your hands and herded you back to your stool. You were left with the plate of bread rolls, which you quickly set aside on the window sill and plucked one right off the pile, wasting no time in savouring the food after the long day you had and the sure-to-be-longer one ahead.
“Save some for me, will you,” He joked, pulling up a chair of his own beside you and discarding the bowls of soup to snatch up a piece of bread himself. You glanced up at him in response, chucking the first thing you could find at him, which just so happened to be a wad of paper to his head. Minho jerked back, surprise quickly melting into a challenging grin as he tossed the piece of paper right back at you. It only took a minute or two for you both to forget about the storm and dinner before you had tackled him to the floor and began trying to gain leverage over him as he struggled in your light grip. Play fighting might as well have been a part of your daily routine, with how often the two of you found yourselves tussling about, whether it was while you were on lunch break in the Maze, trying to prove who was stronger, or just out of pure happenstance. Either way, it always managed to have the two of you laughing, that much evident as you managed to plant a firm hand beside Minho’s head, your eyes locked with his and both of you breathless.
“So. . .” you began, barely able to speak without a few bouts of quieted laughs escaping you, your sides heaving all the while. “You have anything planned for tonight?”
The male seemed close to choking, his own laughter clearly visible in his expression as he brought a knee to your stomach, sending you sprawling on the ground beside him before he mimicked your original position, his typical prideful smirk on his face, “I think I should be asking you that.”
You couldn’t help the grin that overtook your features, whether your heart was beating like a forgotten door in a windstorm due to the situation at hand or the fact that you and him had just spent a good five minutes play fighting completely unbeknownst to you. However, just as you sucked in a breath to suffice your winded and strained breaths, words practically dancing on your tongue with your prepared riposte, the door to your room swung open to reveal an unmistakable blonde standing right in the doorway. His doe-like eyes took in the scene before him, gaze sweeping from Minho’s turned head, wearing a cocky grin at his processing expression to you struggling in the Keeper’s grasp, desperately not wanting him to get the wrong idea.
“We– we were– Minho tackled me!” You cried in feigned anguish, an arm dramatically coming to drape over your forehead, your body going limp in response. Under the joking front, you just hoped that it was enough to distract the second in command from the conclusions he could draw from the position you and Minho were in. “You have to help me!”
“I’m good,” Newt managed, having to stifle his own laughter as you struggled in Minho’s grip, attempting to throw him off in a myriad of ways as he continued. “Alby wanted to see the two of you, so I’d suggest postponing your little. . . session until after you talk to him. Something about the Greenie and a tour.”
You exclaimed a sound of protest, reaching for the wad of paper you had thrown at Minho only a minute or two prior, and chucking it the blonde’s way with the sole intention of hitting the back of his head. But he ducked out of the way and padded down the hallway just in time, allowing it to hit the wall and sink to the floor almost soundlessly, his giggles and laughs audible until he clomped down the stairs and disappeared out of sight. As soon as he was out of earshot, Minho let out an audible groan and moved to lay on the floor in a position similar to yours, clearly dreading the unexpected meeting with Alby. You both lay in silence for a minute or two, your eyes fluttering shut as you exhaled. After a moment or two, you rolled onto your side.
“Come on, shank, best not to keep our loving leader waiting,” You stated as you rolled your shoulders back, wincing gingerly as you finally stood back up.
You both were downstairs and standing where Alby sat at the bar on the first floor of the Homestead, either swishing a glass of water or one of the bitter tasting concoctions Gally mixed up the evening before every bonfire. Silence had settled over all of the other Gladers, each of them tucked into their own sleeping bags and strewn about the floor and practically everywhere you stepped. At least half of them usually slept outside, but with the prolonged rain, it wasn’t quite doable, so whenever a rare storm did happen to spring forward, everyone settled with cramped space in exchange for warmth and a dry place to sleep. Lucky for you, you didn’t have to stress all that much about sharing your space whenever it rained, courtesy of the fact that you’d gotten your own room far before any of the others had even arrived in the Glade, save for Alby and Newt, which was something you often thanked the stars above for. Being crammed into a room with about a dozen other people wasn’t exactly on the top of your bucket list.
You were pulled from your abrupt train of thought though, when your first in command turned to nod at both you and Minho and gestured to the stools on either side of him, a wordless motion for you to sit.
You eagerly complied, the aching of your ankle beginning to set in and make the gears of your brain falter every minute or so from having stood for a good few moments. Minho claimed the seat to the right, leaving you to sink into the stool on the left before Alby tilted his glass in your direction, which you steadily declined with a meagre wave, only for Minho to pluck the drink right out of Alby’s hand the moment it was offered and down the whole thing. Judging by the bitter expression that overtook your fellow Keeper’s face, it answered the question that had drifted through your mind a minute earlier; Gally had been handing out samples of his drinks, then.
You and Alby shared an off-handed snicker before the latter composed himself and began to speak at last.
“Since Y/N here’s screwed their ankle for the time being, you’re gonna be stuck with running by yourself for the next few days,” Alby pointed out, directing his words to Minho, whose thoughts were practically on display for anyone who passed; thanks for stating the obvious. But he remained silent nevertheless, only nodding along and allowing the other ample time to speak. He turned to you next, jutting his chin almost imperceptibly, “which means I want you to show Greenie the ropes. I’ll still show him around, Chuck’s already been assigned as as his tour, but just keep an eye out while you’re stuck here, yeah?”
“On it,” You confirmed with a complacent tilt of your head, which Alby returned without missing a beat.
“That’s all, I just knew it’d make Minho mad,” He mused after a moment of you both staring at him expectantly, as though he had more left to say. A muttered “yeah, whatever” was drawn from the aforementioned Runner, at which you grinned and nodded toward the two of them once more.
“Good that. I’m gonna head to bed then.”
Minho and Alby spoke their quick farewells in your direction as you headed back up the stairs, careful to avoid any of the loitering Gladers as you stepped around any of them that were inconveniently stationed right in the middle of the hallway leading off to your room. Once you finally slipped through and into your room and shut the door behind you, night had fully fallen, starlight and moonbeams spilling through the window as you cleared the dishes from yours and Minho’s dinner that had been left on the sill and set them aside on the table they had been originally.
Thankfully, you had changed the minute you had gotten back to the Homestead after your checkup with Clint and Minho was off showering, so you collapsed onto your bed with a content sigh, feeling as though you fell asleep the instant your head hit the pillow.
—
You were awoken by a rapid knocking on your door, a voice slurred from sleep sounding from the other side allowing you to conclude that it was wake up call, to which you allowed yourself to brush off momentarily. You rubbed at your eyes and blinked a few times, huffing a bleary sigh and swinging your legs so that they dangled over the edge of the mattress. You stretched out your limbs before finally slipping out of bed and padding rather wobbly across your room to retrieve your running harness hung by the door before you remembered your little predicament as your ankle knocked against the leg of your dresser. You bit back the urge to curse the stupid thing, finding payback as you harshly pulled the drawers open and rifled through clothes you didn’t use when running. After a few moments, you settled with your go-to outfit for whenever you didn’t care to put too much effort into searching for clothes but still wanted to look presentable.
You were changed and out the door in a matter of minutes, waving to Winston as you passed him on the way down the stairs and high fiving Chuck’s outstretched hand before you easily climbed down the handful of steps that led from the Homestead and onto the dew-misted grass. The other Gladers were milling about, sleep still laid thick in the air along with the early morning scent of the lavender you had begged Newt to plant for about a month straight, claiming that it would help keep everyone who passed calm and content, when in reality, you just wanted it there to help cover up the eyesore of the Bloodhouse and aesthetic. You grinned at the memory as you headed for the kitchen, recalling how proud he had looked when it first began to bloom and the way he looked as though he was about to burst when you thanked him eagerly.
You were among the first early risers who managed to snag places at the front of the line to collect breakfast, which allowed you to peer over the counter to see what Frypan had whipped up for the morning. You could typically tell by what had been cooked whether he had been in a rush or not, so when you laid eyes upon buttered toast and boiled eggs with vegetables freshly sliced from the garden, you knew he had to be in a good mood. When it was your turn, you slid into place opposite from where Frypan was standing, offering him a bright grin and wave before he slid your tray of food toward you. The chef looked up, a matching smile instantly greeting you as he leaned against the counter.
“Hey, N/N. Heard about your fiasco yesterday,” He prodded teasingly, to which you rolled your eyes playfully and lifted your tray.
“Seems as if everyone has,” You shot back easily, tapping the counter by way of farewell along with a laugh at his words. “Thanks for the food! See you at lunch!”
“You too!”
You sighed mindlessly to yourself as you walked from the kitchen, the golden rays of sun bathing you in much needed warmth and a light breeze batting at your hair as you walked. The table that you typically sat at appeared after a moment or two of walking, the worn picnic table a good few feet away from the front door of the Homestead but at a central point that allowed you a view of all the other Gladers as they seemed to wake up more and more by the second. You seated yourself in the middle of one of the benches and set your tray down, opting to wait to begin eating until the others arrived as you humoured a glass of water idly.
You could feel unadulterated excitement as you remembered that it was Greenie day, practically trembling in your seat because of it. Whenever a new Glader arrived, you took the opportunity and ran with it; you didn’t view them as another mouth to feed, rather the prospect of another pair of hands to help around the Glade and another person to share the crappy experience of the Glade itself with, as corny as it sounded. A new person meant the possibility for a fresh set of eyes that just might be the key to finding a way out, essentially. The idea was something Minho often teased you about when the time for a newcomer approached, but you knew it was all in good fun.
You were about to glance over your shoulder in search of your friends when Newt, Chuck, and Alby all seated themselves in one spot or another at the table. You grinned at the sight, Newt seeming to sense as much as he took up the seat next to you, and merely responded with a breathy laugh and quick shake of his head. Chuck had already launched into a rigorous rant about one of the Trackhoes that had left a particularly big mess right outside of the kitchen when bringing in the vegetables of the week for Frypan to use that he’d ended up having to clean, you listening intently all the while as you pushed around the piece of toast on your plate with a fork. Despite how clearly frustrated the younger boy was, his animated hand gestures that subconsciously whipped back and forth along with his words were enough to make you take it all in with an amused smile, left breathless once he finally finished and turned to his plate while you laughed lightly.
“Well, we appreciate you cleaning it up, I didn’t even realise anything had happened. I’m sure Newt can give whoever it was an hour-long lecture to make sure it doesn’t happen again, though,” You replied between drinks of water. You nudged the blonde’s leg from under the table and shot him a sideways glance, subtly tilting your head toward the other boy when he looked up at you in confusion. Newt stumbled to respond, tapping his fork against his plate as he let out a slightly nervous laugh.
“Yeah, of course. I’ll put the shank in the Slammer next time he does it.”
Chuck beamed, shooting the second in command a thumbs up as he took a bite of his sandwich, clearly eager to get the day started as he rushed to finish the meal. From beside him, Alby stood, silent as ever as he watched the conversations take place, gaze occasionally lifting from his plate to glance at each of you but finally spoke as you made eye contact with him.
“Since Greenie obviously isn’t gonna be coming anytime soon, probably in the afternoon, we’ll just have the tour be tomorrow,” He stated in an almost bored tone, his shoulder rolling back in the direction of the Box. “He can work with you and Newt in the gardens ‘til then.”
Newt jumped in before you could answer with more than a nod, “Good that. We still on for the bonfire?”
You and Chuck both looked up from your plates at that, your eyes sliding toward Alby as he seemed to consider Newt’s words, weighing the options.
“Yeah, I don’t see why not. ‘Sides, I think the others’d kill us otherwise.”
—
The early afternoon sunlight was searing as you lifted a hatchet you’d been working with for the past hour above your head before bringing it down to split a block of wood in half and embed itself into the stump below.
After spending your morning weeding out the vegetable garden and picking carrots, you had found that the wood to be used in the fire that night still had yet to be chopped, so you were more than happy to step in and come to the aid. Newt had tagged along, the two of you drifting in and out of conversation as he carried on with tasks around the stump that you were chopping wood at and keeping an eye on your ankle in case you misstepped or twisted it on accident, and he was taking his first break of the day, his body leaned against the the fallen tree as he watched you bring the axe down on one of the last pieces of wood. You huffed in exertion, the back of your forearm coming to wipe the beads of sweat from your forehead before giving the tool a final swing to set it purposefully into the tree stump.
You heard Newt whistle, your head turning right to glance over at him before he tossed you his water bottle, which you snatched out of the air and took gratefully. You were about to hand it back to him and utter your thanks after a long minute of downing the water when the final blare to announce the arrival of the Box sounded, all the Glader’s heads shooting up in response. You shot Newt a grin before he laughed and rolled his eyes, gesturing for you to head toward it with him on your heels.
You arrived a minute or two after everyone else, your ankle’s several jolts of protest slowing you down to a fraction of your typical speed, so by the time you had even reached the fringes of the crowd gathered around the newcomer, the Box’s doors had already been thrown open, the Greenie likely already dragged out.
Several murmurs and taunting comments were exchanged as everyone else seemed to get a good look at him, leaving you attempting to crane your neck to see over the sea of bodies crammed together, only for them all to let out a laugh in unison, all of them parting someone bolted through the crowd and headed straight for you.
“Looks like we’ve got ourselves a Runner!” Someone called as the person who you could only assume was the Greenie continued sprinting, seemingly unaware of their surroundings as they took off. You braced yourself for the harsh impact, knowing you wouldn’t be able to make it out of the way in time with the speed he was running at, but it seemed as though his luck ended about there, leading to him tripping and falling right at your feet.
As dazed, hazel eyes looked up at you, you smiled, recovered from the minor scare he had given you and offered a hand for him to pull himself up,
“Welcome to the Glade, Greenie.”
#tmr thomas#newt x you#the death cure#the maze runner#tmr minho#tmr newt#maze runner#maze runner x reader#mazerunner#minho x y/n#tmr fanfiction#tmr x reader#tmr series#tmr alby#minho x reader#minho#tmr gally#the scorch trials#aris maze runner#newt x y/n#thomas x reader#thomas#tmr fandom#fanfic#fandom#newt x reader
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Long post, apologies and/or you're welcome if you're nosey.
So I've been doing a lot of reflecting on the past new yearses, and it's odd to think about the last one specifically after this whole year. The last was so perfect, my ex of a year went out of their way to make me feel included and distracted with happy things and to make up for leaving me alone on it the year before. We went to a board game night with like 10 wholesome people, it was so fun and there were so many dogs to pat, topped with a midnight kiss under the stars. And it meant so much, because really I don't do well on new years on my own anymore (past assault on that night from a different ex of two years and all that jazz that I get flashbacks to yearly). And then like, what, 4 weeks later this lover of mine threatened to kill me? To feel so seen and so safe and so loved, to suddenly be faced with emptiness and sincere danger. "If I were to kill myself, I'd take as many people out as possible beforehand, and you'd be the first. You'd be the first person I killed". All of their pages seem inactive now, I can't help but wonder if they are posting again just under a new username. Or have they mostly kept to themself for the rest of their year? I guess it's not for me to know, it's for me to leave behind with the rest of this write off year.
I had this anon a while back, saying I'll never find a good relationship until I can love myself. Like oh sweet thing, I love myself very much, my self work journey started at 17, I made peace with myself on one specific day at 22, very cathartic, would recommend. But I'm 29 now so that's a lot of time being my own buddy. I just somehow attract pathological liars and sociopaths who flip on me one day. I'm not just sure if it's a reflection of the current dating pool, and dishonesty is just the new norm, or if I'm just too trusting of a person myself. Either way, I'm exhausted. I'm not looking forward to likely be spending the new year alone, but I am looking forward to a new start next year.
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zoe’s social media content hasn’t changed at all…
u know when i said i'd come back to it i meant that i'd write a separate, original post abt it but who knew even after being semi inactive i could still continue to count on my passive aggressive anons to give me a more efficient way to talk abt my opinions under their comments. btw this is gonna be long n it's only part one i'll add more in a sec <3
anyway. if u want me to give u the benefit of the doubt i can assume u maybe just don't remember s5/6 all that much. the thing is that s7-8 are a unit n the change i'm talking abt has been gradually happening since s7 specifically bc they already knew what s8 was gonna be like. we as the audience didn't so ofc it didn't seem as insidious back then as it does now in retrospect when we know what it was always leading to. also inb4 someone comes complaining abt how i'm just making shit up now: this isn't a new thing i literally already talked abt this during s7. zoe's oversexualization vs mailin's "purity" hasn't come out of nowhere:
now that said even IF u only remember s7 sm content, there still is like. a drastic unmissable change so idk what ur talking abt. but alright let's move on to zoe's instagram ❤️ here's her s5-6 type of content vs s7 aka what she posted before mailin's season was ever planned vs while her season was already concrete but her story wasn't the focus yet
n these are her posts just from the first week of mailin's season + the last posts of s7 after her relationship w finn was ending
i personally don't even think these individually would be bad but it's the fucking ig stories that are the last straw for me.
the nexts pics are from s5-7 n the content zoe posted during it
we have silly faces & sweet smiles w butterflies, a ton of her in bed in hoodies n her glasses, a loooooot of taste testing n so many vids of her just eating food. the closest we've got to her silly faces in s8 that have been CONSTANT in the past? the sexy teacher look i guess. seriously, not even during halloween, during the sexiest of holidays, did she pose suggestively like this
her just messing up her shirt looking like she drooled on herself n let's not forget her funny filters!
n u might think wah wah ur just cherry picking the posts!!!! i literally went through ALL of her highlights n the ganggang account n tried to screen shot every post (excluding dancing, bc we'll get to that in the next part) that could be counted as suggestive n i got like. 3
n u know what else i realized while doing that? on zoe's own instagram u can find more suggestive/"sexy" poses from kieu my than from zoe herself
now here's the content we have of her from one week during season 8, a season who's protagonist is uncomfortable w sex n is the most vocal abt women's rights n trying to emphasize women as more than sexual objects.
in all of her pics she's posing w her butt out, she's sensually touching her chest n laying on the floor winking at the camera, almost flashing under her skirt while dropping it down n one of her shaking her hair to the lyrics "sometimes all i think about is you" & "can't make you happier now". now whether or not u wanna count that as lyrical symbolism when she's posting that around the time mailin is gaining interest in her ex is up to u but worth pointing out :)
and it IS imperative to know WHEN these new types of posts are being posted. who knows maybe mailin will organize some feminist movement n zoe will post a pic w no make up to participate. maybe she'll post an ugly hangover selfies after a major party during the season. these are not the Only types of pictures/stories she'll post. but u cannot deny the intentional timing of zoe, finn's ex, suddenly acting n posting like this out of the blue at the exact same time mailin, finn's new interest, is clip after clip emphasizing how much she dislikes the idea of sex/touch & fighting against the objectificaion of women. also literally as i was typing this post out zoe posts a new pic n i was pleasantly surprised to see it's just a cute silly butterfly ring :) oh and also the last slide is her sliding her hand up her thigh w the camera angle almost showing up her skirt :)
also like i said this is long lol but yes this was only the first part <3 in the next reblog i'll talk abt dancing like i promised. u know bc zoe loves dancing! <3 unlike mailin. mailin is awkward w dancing, she just stands to the side. mailin prefers football and is sporty. mailin is one of the boys as they beg her to join their team bc she's such a talented smart athletic girlboss who uses more than her physical looks to be cool.
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NEOPETS DRAMA INCOMINGGGGG
(A continuation of a previous post on the matter.)
Alright my dudes I guess there’s no reason to hide it anymore soooo.
I’m pretty sure I helped get Ivy and Will frozen.
Obviously Ivy was the most suspicious, always magically getting very nice real words/names from nowhere. I don’t engage in cheating or anything so it’s not like I had proof that she was cheating of any kind, so I just avoided trading for her pets lest I get caught up in a reversal and end up with no pet because Neopets staff can’t exactly recreate a name.
As more names kept appearing (not just from her and her buddies but from other people) I finally started to wonder just how bad this problem was. I had an oooold list that I made shortly after the last account purge in 2012 - where inactive accounts get deleted, including the pets on them, sometimes including pets with real word/names like Skunk, Tubby or Fiona. As the old accounts are deleted users can recreate these names if they’re fast enough. I was very active in the previous one and made the list to prepare myself for the next one... whenever that happens. This list I made had the names of accounts and what nicely-named pets they had.
ANYWAYS. Using the gift/curse of hyperfixation, I went through every account and name on that list to see what pets had moved, as well as miscellaneous notes (when the account was last logged into, if any of the pets had been replaced, etc.). I’ll be straight with y’all, high school me had made a MASSIVE list. THOUSANDS of names. I chipped away at this for like, 2 or 3 weeks. I will fully acknowledge this was a silly use of time, but hey at least I’m not watching racist Minecraft Youtubers or trading cryptocurrency.
Well, by the time my list was finished I found that about 20-25% of the names had moved with no indication of a trade or that they were moved between accounts owned by one person (for non-Neopets players, a person can have up to 5 accounts, 1 ‘main’ account and 4 ‘side’ accounts). I noted in my spreadsheet the original account the pet was on, where it had moved to, and any notes (if the pet had been replaced by another one, how long ago the account was last logged into, etc.)
I sat on this list for a while. I shared it with some Neo buddies who also didn’t want to get caught up in trade reversals, and some non-Neopets-playing friends who thought the whole situation was insane. I hesitated reporting anything officially because it didn’t really prove anything and I didn’t want innocent people to get caught in the crossfire. I also didn’t want cheaters to target me for potentially getting them frozen. Plus, Neopets did a server migration in like 2017 after being bought by a new company and for some reason they kept no account-related records from before then, so any pets stolen before that point couldn’t really be proven to be stolen and I really don’t think the staff would just take one person’s word for what pets went where.
Then a pet got stolen off of an old friend’s account - someone who had only been inactive for a couple of years. And ended up on Ivy’s account. No new pet in its place to indicate it might have been traded.
My friend LOVED that pet and wouldn’t have traded it, much less given it away. Pissed, I decided to send the spreadsheet to the Neopets team anonymously. A few days later, Ivy and a couple other people (who I later learned were friends with her) had been frozen.
Fast-forward and I ended up telling people I thought I could trust about my spreadsheet, and apparently what I did is now a well-known fact in the cheating community. I know this because people keep bugging me about it across multiple websites.
And then today another drama board started and like the fool I am I engaged in the conversation. This is like the third time my name has been brought up on these kinds of topics so I finally just publicly admitted to what I did.
I sent in the spreadsheet in like... early March? And the hoes are still mad about it. At first it was annoying but now it’s just entertaining (because I’m NOT the only one who had receipts on Ivy and co, I can tell you that much. From what I gather it sounds like one of the people in that circle turned on the rest and reported them to the Neopets staff). I guess they just want an easy mark or something. Also I have no plans to post the spreadsheet anywhere so these guys should give it a rest lol
I suppose I’m throwing stones in a glass house given that I am still playing Neopets, got invested enough to make the spreadsheet and enjoy looking at the drama boards that pop up, but at the end of the day every single person involved is a clown in the same circus.
The only difference is I'm willing to admit that I am one. Honk honk, bitch.
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Studyblr community - long time no see
Wow it’s been a minute since I’ve been on tumblr. Almost a year I think? Maybe less/more. I forget. Lots has changed and I’m not sure anyone actually followed me before anyways, but here’s an update for anyone who might have.
I graduated in December with my BS in Bioengineering (concentration in bioinformatics). The year prior I got to work on a super sweet senior design project which went well and overall ended my college career with a bang. Since then I have been having trouble finding a job in my area, so I expanded my search to all around the country and I think I’m positioned to have 4 (?) job offers which will be wonderful coming from a point where I couldn’t even get the first interview. Most of these jobs are bioinformatics/bioinformatician related jobs but a few jobs relate to data totally out of the biology sphere. A company (non-biology) is flying me out to their site next week and that job is probably my #1 and I’m so excited - I’ve never been flown out anywhere *ever*. It’ll be wild to move wherever I go because I’ve only ever been… here. But I’m excited.
As it relates to studyblr, I guess I’m no longer a part of the club (not like I’ve been active anyways LMAO). For now at least. I do plan to go back to school as soon as I can to get a masters in CS but that’s still a bit away. Overall I’m in a such better place after being off social media for so long and also just gearing up to actually start my life. I’ll by no means be posting consistently on here going forward, at least for now, but I just remembered I still had this tumblr and wanted to see what had changed which thank god isn’t too much.
I hope everyone in this community has been well - whether that’s with school or finding a job or just in general with life. Thanks for those that still follow an inactive blog like mine - it’s cool coming back and seeing new notes on old posts of mine.
#studyblr#laegless#bioengineering#bioinformatics#life update#into the void#can’t believe I remembered some of my tag system still LOL#so silly
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unpopular opinion: active mutuals who ghost/don't interact with you
this is probably one of my biggest pet peeves on Tumblr. I want to start by saying that I completely understand when people go on hiatus, or even when they temporarily lose interest in one of their own muses, so they can't find the inspiration to write them. I get that. I've done both.
what I find annoying (and a bit hurtful) is when you become mutuals with someone, you both name muses you'd love to write with, and then...they stop replying. I don't mean that they stopped seeing your IMs (we all know how it is to miss notifications). I mean, you might remind them a week or two later, asking if they're still interested in writing...regardless of how they respond, you both still aren't writing.
and then they keep posting plotting calls.
"I'm bored. does anyone wanna plot?"
"like if you'd like to plot something!"
seriously? you have people to plot with.
I deal with this by simply unfollowing after a week or two (maybe more) of no interaction between myself and the other admin. I'm not gonna write an indirect to be passive-aggressive. I'll just huff and move on. I guess it irritates me because there have been times when I have a cool plot in mind, one that's for a specific canon and my OC, and I end up waiting days to weeks to months to RP that because I don't want to cross a line by sharing my plot with a different person later.
again, if you have whatever reason to be inactive, or just not write with a mutual/a certain character for some time...try being honest instead of acting like no one wants to write with you. especially if you're a "highly selective" account with 30+ writing partners.
#rant tw#tw: rant#admin#unpopular opinion#RP life#rpc#roleplay community#tumblr#I know the hate's coming
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Tumblr is trending on twitter. Apparently female presenting nipples got unbanned here within a week of Musk buying twitter and telling people they have to pay for verification status.
I never fully understood why the ban made the toxicity on this site decrease when so many of the people I saw being toxic seemed to be of the sex-negative variety, but I do understand that twitter is where a lot of that toxicity moved to and I miss a grand total of exactly one blog that went inactive following the ban. In isolation, I guess I like that the ban was lifted because free expression even though it has little relevance to what I use the site for. (Apparently my Workemon secretary post got flagged, appealed, and overturned all without my knowing at some point for reasons I don’t understand tho?) But in the grander context of site developments I’m uneasy with this. I wouldn’t be shocked if someone decided to reverse the ban now specifically with the idea that it was a great time to try and bring user levels back up, but I really don’t want tumblr to be the destination for everyone who would flee twitter over Musk.
...That being said, if this did, somehow, turn into the new site people use as a primary platform for discourse after a mass twitter exodus, it is at least a better format for discussions. Still absolutely baffling to me that people try to hold serious conversations on a site that only lets you write three sentences at a time.
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honestly I wouldn’t put too much stock in follower counts and activity pages. obviously we have no idea how many followers users have but I’d wager it’s around 50 for most people, and depending on how long you’ve been on here, a good chunk of them might be inactive or lurkers.
furthermore, this used to be the reblogging things site, which has since been plagued with likes only. it’s like that for a lot of posts, big blog or otherwise. but the problem with that is, if no one reblogs things, there’s less opportunity for more notes in the first place.
the moral of this story is, do whatever you want and don’t worry about adding your voice on anything! the numbers do not matter at all
Thanks so much anon, that's very kind of you to say!!! I love every single one of my followers, even the inactive ones and even the scandalously dressed ladybots that I haven't reported & blocked yet. XD Like, I seem to be miscommunicating lately, and it feels like maybe I'm coming across as upset/stressed out/angry without meaning to? So I'm gonna take this chance to needlessly describe my activities for the last 24 to 48 hours to prove a point lmfao.
Yesterday morning, I was reintroducing my grumpy timid cat to a super friendly cat I will be cat-sitting for the next month or so, which was super fun and one of my special interests. After that, I was chillin with my fandom homies while we played Jackbox and heard each other's voices for the first time ever (voices that were audibly referencing Vader's Uterus lmfao so I was pretty ecstatic). After that, I played around with my INCREDIBLE Vader bop-it toy that I bought yesterday based on a friend's recommendation. My first Hasbro merch ever. :) I'm in love and I still can't believe it's a real thing that exists.
At that point, I checked Tumblr and... yeah, admittedly I panicked a little because I was a bit scared I'd soon get a bunch of angry asks screaming at me for being a meanyhead (to beat a horse dead, this is just a regular run-of-the-mill anxiety of having a fandom blog and it is absolutely nobody's fault). So I spent an hour or so chatting with a friend until I felt better and then I quickly made the post in question regarding my follower count so that, despite the bewildering attention Five Peggats Each has gotten, everyone would know the truth about my lack of influence lmao. (This is a compliment. From me to me. I like my lack of influence. I'm not fucking kidding lol. I actually have panic attacks sometimes about the idea of becoming internet famous. I literally don't want that lmao. Fifty to a hundred followers is an A+ amount imo, so it's about time I guess it's about time I start losing those pornbots lmfaoo.) Anyway, last night was probably the first time I've checked my follower count in the entire history of this blog tbh. So like, you're being super sweet, anon, and I'm hoping other people will see this too because it's absolutely true and I think your words would be very encouraging and reassuring to anyone who sees this!! But I promise you that my activity log statistics and teh amount of followers I have are not things I spend time thinking about.
Once that was all taken care of, I wrote/edited a little bit for my fic for QuinObi week (SO EXCITED! Literally just a few more days!). Then at around 4am, I woke up with middle-of-the-night epiphanies on how to phrase a couple things/finish/tidy up my thoughts for that Fox opinions post, and I lay in bed working on that for an hour or so. After that, I went back to sleep, woke up, chatted with the fandom homies again, and then, ever since, I've been playing a video game I've been dying to play all week. Until about an hour ago, I literally had no idea what may or may not have been going down on Tumblr, and I wasn't thinking about it at all. And now that I've enjoyed myself on Tumblr for the day, I'm probably gonna invite my mom up tonight so she can spend time with the cats while I use her as a captive audience to talk about Vader's Uterus lmfao. And then at about 10pm, I'm gonna head bed because I work for a living and I forgot to ask if I get the holiday off.
All of this to say I am fine!! I'm just chilling, living my life, doing my own thing. For me, Tumblr is like a fun thing to check out every once in a while, the same way I spent time playing my video game, enjoying my Vader bop-it toy, hoarsing around with the cats, or anything else that strikes my fancy. Kidney stones and abusive ex-bosses are the things I worry about, not like.... a pixelated number on a screen lmao. In other words, this is a hobby to me, not a livelihood, and if I wasn't enjoying my time here, I literally would not log on (and sometimes I don't log on! For days and days at a time. Because I'm enjoying other things more!)
But anyway, I will say that the thing that makes it the most fun for me here? People like you!! Who send me asks. Who share their thoughts on my posts. Who became friends that give me the confidence to make the posts that I wanna make. Who have other fun lil interactions with me. So (1) Please don't worry about me. I'm fully medicated, my back is sore, and I'm too old to be upset over fandom things lmao. And (2) I really cannot thank you and everyone who makes my fandom experience so enjoyable!!! :D Y'all are great and I'm thrilled to be able to have fun here. I'm living my best life.
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🌟lights
just my thoughts on the current state of this fandom... feel free to scroll past...
I used to watch Hololive girls especially Calli and Gura. I just think they are great streamers and singers. But what made me back away from their fanbase was their fans. I think it sucks that its common for gachikoi and unicorns to exist in the vtuber world.
When I discovered Holostars, I was kinda surprised that they look like they are all on the same page even if they have their kamioshi, they would also support the other guys. I will be honest, when it comes to fandoms, I am a but a lurker. But ホロスタ民 (holosutamin) / Starlights got me to interact. It was easy to talk to anyone. And if any of the Stars are being pulled down, Starlights are there to not talk badly but to show support, extra hard. They'll trend but not in the bad way, it'll be flooded with love and support from Starlights.
Recently, we had 2 fallen Stars and although it made me sad. Seeing the orc back made me feel better. I'm still sad mind you but at least I know they are doing great.
I'll be honest when Mayuzumi Kai of Nijisanji and Tsukumo Sana of Hololive Council graduated, I cried quite a lot. I guess its because I don't know what gonna happen to them, like if they are happy and healthy. It sounds crazy but that was me for probably 2-3 days.
So again, when the orc posted that damn spear, I was kinda satisfied. Also Astel singing made me feel at ease. But I still get teary whenever, I see fanarts of them, especially from Vesties and Magmites thanking them.
What surprised me are some of the fans. There are those that openly support Randon and Professor Lando, and those the openly would say that they will mute or block anyone talking about Randon and Professor Lando.
I've read that they feel betrayed from immediately streaming a day or 2 after the announcement. That they didn't even try to have a graduation stream. Here's my 2 cents. They are under an agency, whatever they say on those notices are possibly not all true, it was vague regardless how much I read it. We don't know if they were really given the option to have a goodbye stream and we don't even know why they choose to leave, heck we didn't even know if they had the choice to stay! Will they talk about it? Most likely not. NDAs exists.
Also I don't think it was unfair that they decided to stream right after the announcement. Professor Lando has been streaming for a while but for Randon, he has been inactive for a year. And I couldn't blame them for streaming immediately, regardless of how you look at it, streaming is a job. Its been 7 weeks since they last streamed. And what are they gonna do, wait? For who? When they are essentially has been let go.
People cope differently. My thoughts about this whole situation is still muddy. Sure, I'm distracted by Holostars Rust and next week it'll be the first anniversary celebration of Guild Tempus. But there is still a part of me wanting to know what the F*** happened.
I still feel like Cover / Hololive Production trying to distract the fans and cover this whole situation up. I feel like they urged Temma to start season 2 of Holostars Rust cause they know how the fans will feel after the announcement. They even tried to hype up the event by posting an official Holostars Rust season 1 highlights video. Management even paid for the trophy for this season.
Then they also suddenly announced the Tempus anniversary, why do I think this is another distraction? Shinri found out about the anniversary while he is streaming Rust. Shinri was even planning a long break after Rust.
I can't push my ideas to others, the only thing I can do is write my thoughts. If I have one wish for this whole situation, is that the boys don't feel this divide. Just dont let the boys feel that this is their fault. From the 2 Stars that have talked about this situation, they also know this whole thing is also less than ideal.
My wish for the fans, I just hope this feeling of excluding people for their preference fade. I don't want this fandom to divide merely because of an individual's preference.
And I wish for management to talk to their talents of both branches before any announcements or events. I hate that announcements like this have to overlap with projects that the talents worked hard on. Don't merely let your talents talk about things when it should be management that should be announcing it first. When they feel burdened, even if they don't say it outright, we feel it too. Don't forget, Holostars' fans are mostly women. Women's intuition is crazy.
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I feel like blogging today. I have another story to tell about this girl in the same graduating high-school year as me. So I had recently got back from a boys rehab wilderness camp in Washington. Great boys, one kid even socked me in the face. We smoked cigs and hit the vape everyday for 8 months. They all left one by one though. Only names I remember are Zach and Cody. Anyways after I left Grey Wolf Ranch Washington, I went to university in Taiwan for business administration and did a semester. I didn’t fap for like 5 months. Then this girl Isis Chu appeared on my Instagram feed and I thought she was the hottest girl ever. So I started fapping again to one of her pictures since I didn’t fap for 5 months. I only fapped to her picture and ended my no-fap streak because my brain decided to go like “It’s her!” For example, my brain actually made the audible sound saying “it’s her!” I never talk inside my mind unless I’m reading or I need to say something to myself. So I fapped to one of her pictures. Then, I went homeless in Taiwan because my mom was being a cunt to me. One of my white high-school friends paid for a flight back to California and I ended up living with another Asian high-school friend. I had to pay rent and I didn’t have a car, so I was biking to work 4 times a week. Rent was $750 and I owed $800 to my white friend. I lasted like 6 months until I got illegally evicted since there was no contract with my Asian friend. It was just a verbal agreement and I practically paid him cash. Also, since silly me thought I was gonna be independent, I took my dog from my dad’s house and the dog got killed while I was stealing something after work. Some guy tried to stop me by tackling me and I ran into the street with my dog in my backpack. The dog fell out and got hit by a car. I gave the dog to animal control and then I called my Asian friend to pick me up. It’s funny because he was low on money since he had just bought a couple pounds of ecstasy pills. Anyways, after that happened I quit work and got evicted, so I moved back in with my dad. At some point I realized the girl in the same graduating high school year as me had some “nipslips” on the internet. I collected them all and posted the images to her unofficial subreddit. I felt bad doing that so I deleted the post. But I uploaded it to some image website as well. So yea this girl, she was making money doing like paetron and she tried to do some twitch streams. She was posting on Instagram with her boyfriend who is a Facebook ad revenue course distributor. I told all my white high school friends I thought she was hot or at least cute as well. After a while, she went ghost on social media and removed most of her pictures from Instagram. She seems to be pretty successful, as she graduated from a UC university. She also made a couple websites selling clothes and she even made some money creating some group chat you had to pay for. I got the texts but it was kind of pointless for me because it’s not like she was my girlfriend or anything. I just remember she said something about making broccoli in the mass group chat that sent to individual addresses. She is completely inactive on social media and does not make any more posts. Honestly I felt bad after posting her nipslips to Reddit. So I dmed her boyfriend and said she was a god. He saw my message and blocked me. One less hater I guess, even though she was kind of abusing the internet business. I also saw her one time when I visited her UC school. From my perspective the only things I did wrong was I made some troll comments saying I would steal her from her boyfriend on her Instagram. I hope I wasn’t individually the deciding factor for her deleting everything on social media because she had a ton of haters. She’s kinda too tall for me anyways.
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