#get real babe
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looks like I’ve said too much on the internet 😨
#there are two kinds of repliers#clare as IF i fell in love with u only post March 2022#get real babe#replies#sunshinemarauder#kay elle cee#clare with no i
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yesterday while feverish i wrote about how boats can moor next to each other like pigeons, cooing with the gentle rap of water against their hull. you once said that that the way i see things - birds in the water, feathers in marina paint - was "childish and naive." you said i'd been misdiagnosed - "it can't all be adhd. you might be just kind of stupid and lazy."
i still do certain things like how you taught me - turn the pillow case inside out before putting it on. drive defensively. hate myself entirely.
the prompt for this poem is "mahler's fifth." i wish it wasn't, but mahler's fifth was our song. it ended up in my book. every person that knows your name has promised me they'll give you one swift rabbit punch, right to the face. dean read the book and showed up on my front porch, drenched in sweat from running the 8 miles at 4 in the morning. he was shaking. pacifist and gentle - he works with children - i'd never seen him furious. a punch isn't going to do it, he said, and then said i'm sorry. i had to come to see if you were okay.
mahler's fifth was mine first, like my girlhood. i like the way each movement piles onto the next movement, each instrument bleeding into the next. i like the horn version the best. before i met you, i danced to it on grass still-wet from sprinklers.
later you would tell me that the way you heard it was somehow better. you understood something in it that i couldn't quite wrap my fingers into. once, on our anniversary, you asked the classical music radio station to play it for us. we missed hearing it because we were fighting. one of the things people get wrong about abuse is that sometimes victims are, like, brutally aware of the stupidity of our situation. what do you mean that you thought i wasn't good enough for you? you? you're just... nothing.
sometimes people can pull the poetry out of your life. i watched my words become clothesline, and then thin out into kite twine. i watched you chew through every good syllable of me. so many good songs and places and moments were ruined. i am glad you didn't like most of my music - less to tie back to you.
but still mahler's fifth. the music swells, and i am 21 and throwing up in a bathroom on my birthday. a woman i will later refer to as lesbian jesus runs a cool hand down my back, her perfect pantsuit starch-pressed. she told me to leave you. she said - and this is true, and not an invention of rhyme or fantasy - i'm you from the future.
i am 22, and i got home from an award ceremony, and i remember you telling me - you act so proud of yourself when you're actually so fucking embarrassing. i took you to disney world. you took my virginity. i gave up visiting spain for a week with my family - i instead choose you, to spend the time just-cuddling. you called it "our fuck week." the music swells. it probably should have been a red flag that for about 3 years - i just gave up on crying. my grandfather died and you said nothing. my uncle died and you ghosted me for 3 weeks. you said i need to protect myself from your ongoing tragedy.
every so often i come back to the memory of one of our last afternoons in person. i had just told you that i wasn't going to law school, despite the free ride - i was going to join a creative writing program. master's in fine arts. i was going to finally do it - i was going to follow my dreams. this blog was already internet-famous. however reluctantly, i would occasionally refer to myself as a poet. i got into umass amherst's writing program for fiction authors. it is one of the the top 5 programs in the country.
wait are you seriously considering actually attending that? dumbfounded, you turned completely towards me in your seat. for the 3rd time in our relationship, you almost crashed the car. you actually want to be a writer?
the first time i went viral, it was for a poem i wrote about you:
he wants to say i love you
but keeps it to goodnight
because love will take some falling
and she's afraid of heights.
every time i see that, i want to throw up. you weren't in love with me, you were in love with the control you had over me. a little truth though: i am afraid of heights. you caught a rabbitgirl and skinned her alive.
mahler's fifth still makes me sick.
give me that back. give me back music. give me back everything i had before you. give me back fearlessness. give me back bravery. give me back a scarless body.
give me back what you took from me.
#nosebleed club#sorry stephen not ur fault#just like. thinking#writeblr#spilled ink#warm up#every time nat is like - oh let me get that for u#im like .... this is a trick right like ur gonna be mean now bc u did something nice rn#so obviously if ur being nice now either u did something mean and im about to learn about it#or you're going to BE mean#or ur gonna hold this over my head forever and i'll never get a nice thing ever again?#and every time nat is like .... babe i just actually like u#lesbian jesus story is 100% real btw. she also told me not to be an event planner#literally changed the shape of my life
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save me "jason todd leaves batfam".... save me.... "jason does not give up everything that makes him who he is to please a mediocre family"... save me...
#the result of seeing too many headache inducing takes#i love when some batfam fans are like -ugh why is jason in everything we don't want that criminal in this-#like babe please most of us don't want him in that family either#let my boy grow up#let him realize his worth and recognize that his supposed family treating him like a freak is not normal#let him get over pleasing bruce!!!!#it's okay babe we'll find you a real father#jason todd#red hood#anti batfam
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Keanu Reeves performing at The Roxy in Los Angeles - July 18, 2023
#keke do you need a hair tie babe I got you#Keanu Reeves#kreevesedit#keanuedit#*#flashing gif#derailed my whole day#LOOK HOW HAPPY HE IS#I LOVE AN OLD MAN#bassist bf#gettin real sick of this tall old man giving me cute aggression#lol jk#get you a man who will give you cute aggression and also cause you to want to invest in those kneeling pads people who garden a lot use#iykyk#me 5'4": i will pick him up#men tucking their hair behind their ear..... *air raid sirens*#he just vibin#i love him your honor#also i love arm#we're not gonna talk about the fingers we're not#*cash register noise* *glass breaking* *car horn*#*me in my yard apologizing to abc news*#i didn't need 14 gifs but tumblr said i could so suffer with me i guess#or take me out back idc#i don't think im gonna survive this tour#clearly#i was gonna talk about man sweat but it made me feel like that one orc from lotr so i won't#it's me hi im the problem it's me#does that bass wanna trade places? i am free 24/7 365 just call me thank you for your time
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#Naruto#Madara Uchiha#Hashirama Senju#hashimada#I really wish we would've gotten to see more of their fight after they were reanimated#too bad that was the part in the manga where kishimoto gave up on himself#ugh love them#madara being so different that hashirama sees a stranger#and is unable to understand why he can no longer get through to him the way he used to#babe he's 80 years older than you'll ever know#this is not the man you thought you killed#madara has lost everything by the end of his real life#when he's reanimated he's completely abandoned his humanity#finally gets to let some of that anger out#love him so much#good for him
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the first frienderbender is usually the roughest, but you get used to 'em after a while
#he needed an emotional support nate while he was hurling in the bathtub#don't we all tbh#let's be real though pickles would get way too excited#and he'd be the first one vomiting#ESPECIALLY during the preklok era are you kidding me#metalocalypse#dethklok#preklok#pickles the drummer#nathan explosion#im so bad at backgrounds and shading#jamesposting#babe wake up new james art just dropped#digital#drawing#fanart
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listen.
is Halsin physically hot? yes.
you know what's hotter though? his personality. his manners, his voice, the way he speaks, his thinking process. the man doesn't judge, and he's humble, and he's experienced, and he's a loving nature druid, and—
i was a goner even before I met him in the game, but the moment he started talking? and then the teiflings' party?
I need him irl for real.
#halsin#bg3#natisplaying#I NEED HIM#he'd be like: kids#and i be like: yes babe now get back to bed#no but for real#he'd be so nice to talk with
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Kenshi feeling too comfy with Johnny around so his thoughts and feelings accidentally come out
Simply like, they'd just be cooking and Kenboy accidentally calls him "Love" and Johnnypoo immediately goes over to him and replies with an absolutely shaky yes
Or maybe on bed together, Johnny is having a bit of a hard time sleeping so the very sleepy Kenshi leans over his side and pats his stomach softly
Eventually, they wouldn't be accidental anymore heehee
#mk1#mortal kombat#johnshi#johnny cage#kenshi takahashi#kencage#kenshi x johnny#i just want them to be in love with each other ok#i accidentally called my friend “babe” one time 😀 the pain was real#Also maybe Jax would definitely get too tired hearing Kenpie talk about his husband#very small thought#brain smooth
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#happy birthday babe!#I’m never getting over this panel#seared onto my brain for real#it’s chuuyas birthday and Taylor plays a show tonight so what’s the point if she doesn’t play this song?#skk#soukoku#dazai x chuuya#bsd#bungo stray dogs#bsd dead apple#bsd dazai#bsd chuuya#dazai osamu#chuuya nakahara#Taylor bsd
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Steve Harrington being nonbinary but thinking he was just too stupid to understand gender
#steve harrington#he/him nonbinaries my beloved#Steve: yeah idk it’s like I don’t really /feel/ like a man but I don’t feel like a girl either so I guess I just don’t get it lol#Robin: … Babe are you ready to possibly learn something about yourself real quick#I’m also a Rob and Steve share gender truther#like that one fic where they swapped middle names??? peak and I need that energy for them everywhere#Steve: Robin it’s my turn with the they/them you wanna trade for the he/him?#Robin: fine but it’s a he/him in a lipgloss kinda way#Steve: Understandable continue on#pyreposting
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Thinking about Peeta playing Is it real or Is it cake around the house and driving Katniss absolutely NUTS.
#giving the Real or Not Real game a whole other dimension lmaoo#if this was a modren AU Peeta would have blown tf up on Tiktok#Sorry babe that's not your bow and arrow#its a dark forest cake that LOOKS like your bow and arrow#She might kill him#but she gets to eat the cake afterwards so its fine#everlark#peeta mellark#katniss everdeen#the hunger games#thg#thg series#katniss and peeta
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I loved how at first Alan didn't want to show Jeff his phone just so that he could read the messages he'd been sending him, but 5 minutes later gives Jeff the entire thing for keepsies "because you don't have your own uwu"
#character development 0-100 real quick#also nothing bad will happen because of alan not having his phone on him riiiight#how long till he gets a new one#pit babe the series#episode 9#jeff#alan#alanjeff#blmpff
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Sometimes I think “God, I am just like Ed” and then I start putting him on a pedestal and make big paragraphs to say that he never did anything wrong in his life and how he’s actually just a very soft person that is hurting deep inside and needs a forehead kiss and then I look in the mirror and realize that I am in fact Stede Bonnet.
#ofmd#our flag means death#stede bonnet#Edward teach#ofmd fandom#I feel like deep down every ‘he’s just like me’-Ed apologist is just a Stede Bonnet in disguise#because let’s be real this is such Stede behavior#I am in fact such a soft person but I always wanna appear tough and cool#I have an avoidant attachment style and am dating the man of my dreams but am rarely spending time with him#because my instinct is to run away once something good starts happening to me#I am such a Stede and honestly perhaps that is one of the many reason why I relate to this show so much#like yes babe I wanna kiss Taika Waititi too only to get a panic attack and run back to the life I hate#sigh
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Another interesting thing re: Ed’s go-to method of strangulation specifically is that it’s SUCH a difficult way to kill. And given his mental block on being able to kill personally, it’s telling that he chooses a method he cannot possibly use any mental gymnastics or dissociation tactics to distance himself from.
Like…no wonder he has such a hard time with it, if this is his personal code. And maybe I just love a masochistic characterization, but I’m fascinated by the fact that rather than resorting to an “easier” method, like a gun—or a mental tactic, a la Frenchie’s box—he just fully commits to the hardest option possible. He just can’t commit a act of violence unless it’s also a violent act against himself.
#babe you knew you weren’t gonna be able to get Stede with that knife let’s be real#as per usual I’m so behind on the meta train so if you’ve already said this…ily#ofmd#ofmd meta#our flag means death#edward teach
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The shock, the relief, the happiness, the pure love on both of their faces. I love them so much
#they love each other so much it makes me want to die but also start living#I don’t think I’ll get to a point where I don’t cry at this scene#I was already crying but i broke down even harder when I saw Simon’s face#they’re like is this real do we actually get this?#yes babes you do!#forever in awe of Edvin and Omar’s acting#wilmon#so beautiful#simon eriksson#young royals#prince wilhelm
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