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#genuinely i have no idea what made it click for me but like
intoxicated-chan · 1 day
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Daryl Dixon request! You and Daryl have just recently got together a few months ago! You and Daryl wander off from the group when you're on the road too look for food water ext, you both get a bit frisky and your sexual tension builds(maybe a bit of bickering), but it’s dangerous, so Daryl takes you against the tree your legs wrapped around him your back against the tree a gun in hand just in case a walker hears, but he’s also kissing you to muffle your moans 💕💕
𝐂𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐫
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Summary ➳ Daryl fucks you against the tree. (Idk what else to say) 
(A/n) ➳ I am not made to write smut! Most of one-shot is just fluff and only a couple hundred words is smut... I’m sorry.   
Word Count ➳ 1.4k 
Content Warnings ➳ Female reader, sexual content, mainly fluff, little smut, typical TWD violence, swearing, pet names (Sweetheart, darlin’), getting caught but not knowing? Unprotected sex, p-in-v, outdoor sex, creampie... 
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“I ain’t gonna say it again.” You pushed Daryl as the two of you walked through the empty streets. “Move your damn ass.”  
“Stop yer damn whinin’.” Daryl retorted. “And I know yer ass ain’t talkin’ crap when ya nearly lost yerself in places like this and I had to find ya.” Finally, he picked up his pace, just like you wanted him to do for the past two hours, maybe more. 
You rolled your eyes, arms crossed and scoffed but quickly shut yourself up when you tripped on your own feet.  
“I heard that.” Daryl commented.  
“Piss off.”  
“Swearin’ ain’t gonna scare me away sweetheart.” He chuckled and stopped, loading his crossbow as he caught sight of a lone walker. “Yer stuck with me.” He murmured, aiming the crossbow with a finger on the trigger.  
“Sadly.” You playfully sighed, standing back as you let Daryl deal with the simple threat.  
How long has it been? Three- no, four? Yes, four months. You both had strayed from the group, a habit you both developed over the past few months, much to the group’s dismay. 
“Top that.” Daryl said, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. He walked to the dead walker, putting his foot on its head to pull the arrow out of its skull. “Now, ya sure we ain’t lost?” He asked, wiping the blood from the arrow.  
You shot him a grin, unfolding your arms and placed them on your lips. “Lost? Please, I could navigate these roads blindfolded.”  
Daryl raised an eyebrow. “Remembered that happened when I left ya with Rick.”  
“Please, don’t remind me.”  
“Then stop lyin’.” 
You shook your head. “Then do you have any idea where we’re headed, Dixon?” You asked, as you pulled at the straps of your bag, trying to relieve your shoulders.  
Daryl shot you a glance, his smirk turning into a genuine smile. “Jus’ followin’ the trail, darlin’.” He answered in his trademark gravelly voice. “Ain’t like we got a map or somethin’.”  
“Well, let’s hope your tracking skills are as good as you say they are.”  
He huffed but then laughed, his eyes moving to what’s in front of them for any sign of movement. “Trust me, (Y/n), ain’t no walker gonna sneak up on us while I’m around.”  
Your smile dropped by the sound of rusting in the bushes beside the road. Daryl aimed his crossbow while you unsheathed your knife. Slowly, they approached the source of the noise, ready to attack. 
But you gasped, a small rabbit darted out from the bush, scurrying away into the distance. Daryl lowered his crossbow.  
“Looks like dinner jus’ ran off.”  
You clicked your tongue, sheathing your knife as you reached into your bag. “Guess we’ll have to settle for canned beans again.” 
The two of you decided to make camp when you noted the sunset, and you knew it would be some time before you reached the group. Daryl gathered dry twigs and branches, making a small fire.  
Sitting side by side on makeshift logs, you both shared a meal of canned beans that were heated by the flames. The fire flickered over the silence, luckily, you both were comfortable.  
Though you side eyed Daryl when he refused the spoon, he found it easier to eat with his hands. Daryl looked at you as you ate, noticing the pistol he had given you for protection wasn’t on or near you. “Where’s the gun I gave ya?”  
You hesitated for a moment, scrapping the sides of the can with your spoon. “I... I couldn’t get it to work.” You admitted sheepishly. “It feels like it’s clogged.” 
Daryl sat his half-eaten can of beans to the side and licked his fingers clean. He reached down to your bag to retrieve the pistol, examining it near the fire. His brows furrowed in concentration as he tried to find the issue.  
As he worked, you couldn’t help but stare. The way his rugged features were softened by the firelight, the way his gruff hands moved with such precision... It made you rub your thighs together.  
He was always skilled with his fingers, making you crumble and become weak with just his hands.  
“-Good to go.” Daryl’s voice made you jump, catching the pistol in time before it hit the ground. “Test it out.”  
You looked around. “Here?”  
“There’s a silencer on it for a reason.” 
“And waste bullets?”  
“Ya gonna complain or try it?”  
Daryl pointed at a tree not far but barely visible. “Try it,” he stood, motioning for you to stand. But you just stared at him. “C’mon.”  
You stood and looked where he pointed, it was a tree with a giant rock to its left side. You gripped the pistol and aimed it.  
Daryl moved behind you. “Ya gotta straighten your posture.” He murmured, his voice low, his hot breath hitting your ear. “Like this.”  
Gently, he adjusted your stance, his hands lingering on your shoulders for a moment, longer than necessary. His hands, his voice, his breath... It all sent shivers down your spinel, a sensation that sent a rush down to your cunt.  
“Is this better?” You said, your voice barely audible. 
Daryl nodded, you couldn’t see but there was a faint smirk. “Much.”  
“Should I-” You stumbled when you felt his hands come on your hips, you felt your face starting to burn. “Daryl?’ 
He hushed you. “Don’ think.” He replied softly. “Go on, fire it.”  
“I can’t.” You retorted. “Walkers are nearby-” 
Daryl snatched the gun and pushed you against a tree, you didn’t see it coming. “Guess I gotta keep ya quiet.” He muttered, leaning in. “Think I didn’t notice ya starin’? Oglin’ me? So damn desperate.”  
“Ain’t my fault.” You said, shrugging, trying to act natural. “Looking like a goddamn meal.”  
“Wanna taste?” Again, he spoke in your ear, nearly making your knees buckle.  
“Please.”  
“Then shut up.”  
He used his free hand to pull you in a kiss, the hand that held a pistol remained by the side of your head. You immediately returned the kiss, your arms wrapped around his neck.  
God, he tasted so good. He smelled so good, some fucking how. Or maybe it was your nose playing with you, but you didn’t care. You needed more of him.  
You then jumped on him, using your own strength to keep you upright. It startled Daryl as he didn’t expect it.  
Daryl's hand squeezed your ass, gaining a moan from you.  He pulled back. “Gotta keep quiet for me.” He said. “Think ya can do that?” 
Yu didn’t understand a single word that came out of his beautiful mouth, but slammed your lips against his, becoming addicted to him.  
“Do me a favor.” Daryl hummed against your neck. “Unbuckle my pants for me.”  
Maggie froze in place, lifting his hand up to stop Carol. “Did you hear that?” She murmured, it sounded like a whimper or maybe a moan.  
“Sounds like a person.” Carol responded.  
“Might be survivors.”  
Nodding in agreement, Carol followed Maggie as she cautiously followed the source of the nose. Moving slowly and carefully, her guard was on high alert.  
But she didn’t expect to see Daryl with his pants around his knees with your legs around his waist. The strap of your tank top fell past your shoulders, exposing one of your breasts.  
It looked like his lips were glued to yours, he only took a couple of moments to catch his breath before they were back on you.  
Carol sighed and covered her eyes turning away, honestly, she wasn’t surprised. She just didn’t think you both go as far as to do it out in the open.  
“That doesn’t look comfortable.” Carol commented.  
“It isn’t.” Maggie replied. “Should we-” 
“Let them get it out of their systems.” Carol grabbed Maggie’s arm to walk away.  
Daryl had you up against the tree, your back throbbing from the uneven trunk digging into your skin. Your lips are most likely swollen by now, saliva dripping down your chin. 
There was something thrilling about being fucked out in the open with danger nearby. But there wasn’t a single ounce of fear with Daryl holding the pistol. 
He felt your fingernails digging into him as he fucked you, he was getting off on it. 
Your moans were always cut off, as well as your words. He took pleasure in seeing you getting frustrated.  
Daryl felt your walls tighten around him, desperately trying to hold him in, chasing an orgasm.  
And when Daryl comes, he does it inside. He manages to go deeper than before. You slumped against Daryl, eyes shut.  
“don’ go sleepin’ on me now.” Daryl now had you standing on your feet, his only hand keeping you up as he looked around. “We got a couple hours before day. I say we use ‘em.” 
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© Intoxicated-Chan 2024, I do not allow my work to be copied, translated, modified, adapted, or put on any other platform without my permission. 
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astranauticus · 9 months
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i'm not even done with the new rwd episode but. spoilers ahead
anyway funny thing. i wasn't like, super on board with the professionals when i was first binging through the first 3 seasons and especially once we got to season 3 i tunnel visioned on VR-LA and MR-SN super hard (as is probably extremely obvious from my art) but like. 4.5?? the exchange they had??? the fucking breakup scene???? yeah. yeah i get it now. i have no idea why or what changed but i have now Gotten It at the worst possible timing. what the hell
#rolling with difficulty#usually i don't tag my rambles but just this once i'm gonna do it i want to share my sadness onto other people#im like too sad to finish rhe rest of the episode but too mad to go to sleep so i'm just sitting here stewing#genuinely i have no idea what made it click for me but like#honestly every part of that conversation hit me like a truck#maxim saying it's rare for adventurers to voluntarily leave that life for 'something greater' - ouch????#like it's so fuckin targeted dear god but also yeah. yeah he would think that huh#vr-la saying he's here as a friend extending a curtesy and maxim immediately being like 'your flattery is unnecessary' like fuck man#'if you wish to avail of my friendship *or something more* i'm afraid that's no longer possible' there's so many layers of what the fuck#'you of all people asking for change' i honestly laughed cuz that's just a good line but also godfuckin dammit#and like just... all of what VR-LA said before he left. like the way neither of them are willing to make enough of a change to get out of th#this unstoppable force vs immovable object situation they're in#they're so like. perfectly in opposition. and it tickles my brain but also DAMN this conversation is painful#god. i hate this /pos#like YES I GET IT NOW BUT ALSO WHY *NOW*#angry and in pain#i guess to some extent it's also like#i've been in that situation where you and a good friend realise your lives are going in irreconcilably different directions#and you want to keep them in your life but it's just not possible with the way you want to live your life and they want to live theirs#and it HURTS and there's NOTHING you can do about it which makes it HURT SO MUCH MORE#fuck. what the hell#especially when the things they'd need to change would also be GOOD for them like maxim embracing change and accepting risks#and VR-LA learing some self-preservation#but at the same time it's like yeah of course they're gonna push each other away rather than change the way they view their lives#i mean both are painful but one of thems clearly easier than the other#i mean speaking from experience one is in fact clearly easier than the other
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orcelito · 2 years
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45884 hits on ao3 and not one of them has commented to say they recognize my username
Is +c: sword and cornett really that obscure?
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flatoatchi · 1 month
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thanks to baldurs gate i'm gonna be so good at dnd by the time we start up our campaign again
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drunktuesdays · 1 year
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everyone is fucking but no one is horny
one of my twitter friends recently said that if she could order up a fic it would be a story written by someone who has only ever read the classics, 1.5 star trek novelizations, and their mother's romance novels from 1970, written about two people are so out of their minds horny for each other it causes them to make the absolute worst choices anyone's ever made.
and i almost lost my mind laughing because i do know exactly what she means. there is a weird vibe i can sometimes sense within the first few paragraphs a fic that really bums me out. it's almost like i can tell the author is thinking way too much about what i'm thinking about their id and it's suddenly like we're all suddenly wondering how riding a bicycle works when we're mid-ride. when you start worrying too much audience interpretation or how a fic is going to do or play or ugh marketability, it genuinely adds some weird self-conscious distance to whatever you're doing. and it's the pits from the reader side because it removes so much horniness from your story even if the idea you have is genuinely good! i know this is not a niche complaint--you find it literally everywhere as every sector of the creative internet gets #content-ed and people can't escape the stats of how any given creative outlet does.
but god there's literally nothing better than sitting down and reading some freaknasty person's art where they do not give a single shit if you like it. they had something to say and my god they were gonna say it. i've accidentally acquired so many kinks by clicking on a story where someone took me on the most insane ride of my life and i thrilled about it. i don't wanna read about polite normal regular love. i don't wanna read about people using therapy-speak on each other. i wanna read about two people feeling the biggest craziest feelings of their entire life and they cannot do anything about it except bang it out. what else are we doing here? if they're not fucking down an entire house, well jed i don't even wanna read it.
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multific · 2 months
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Two Sides of The Same Coin
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Hannibal Lecter x Wife!Reader
Warnings: Cannibalism, Smut, Murder +18!!!
Summary: You two were so different, yet still the same. 
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"Mrs Lecter?" 
You turned and smiled at the woman. "Yes?" you asked with a soft tone when in reality you were fuming.
How dare she just come up to you out of the blue?!
How dare she interrupt your perfect evening?!
"Hi, My name is Lucy, and I'm a huge fan of your books." of course she was, your books are brilliant. "I truly believe you are a pioneer in the genre of horror-romance."
"Thank you very much." Of course you were, no one was as good as you.
"I was wondering if you could sign my book please?"
"No problem at all." you smiled so sweetly. Why would she even have the book with her?! You are in a restaurant! You quickly signed her book and she thanked you, with your smile still present you turned back and lifted your glass to your lips.
"No need to be angry, Darling." your husband chuckled as you looked into his eyes.
Reading the other as if you were open books was something that came to both of you naturally. 
"I'm here to celebrate our anniversary. Not at a meet and greet."
"Of course, but you have to indulge them a little. Make them think they are important so they keep coming back. You mastered that one, My Love."
"I believe it was you rubbing off on me. After all, it is 30 years we have known one another."
"And I knew you were trouble from the second I saw you. Cunning, manipulative, narcissistic, egoistic, psychotic. And yet you are stunning and mine." Hannibal lifted his glass as you clicked yours against his.
"Only yours." you smiled at him, this one, was not fake but a genuine one for your husband.
On your way home from the restaurant, it began to rain, you let out a long sigh as Hannibal was driving.
"Rain always makes me nostalgic," you said as he grabbed your hand and kissed the back of it. He stopped at a red light and you looked at him. "When you killed my stepfather... for me. It was also raining."
"He had it coming, he abused you and murdered your mother. I gave him a merciful end. One he didn't deserve."
"He deserved to suffer like I did, but it was not what I meant, Hannibal."
"Please, elaborate then."
"You killed him because he was about to kill me, you became my saviour, but it is not only that. I remember you tore him apart, you kept on cutting and breaking his bones. I should have been disgusted, yet all I could think about was the way your muscles tensed and the grunts you let out."
"So, I turned you on." he spoke as he turned a corner. "I figured, from the way you acted after."
"I never got naked so fast in my life. We made love in that pool of blood in front of the fireplace. I remember we were young and unsure. It was so hot, I could taste blood on your lips." you could recall the way he moved his hips, so amazing, he reached such depths inside you that you weren't even sure existed. 
But he could also recall the way you completely submit to him. You only ever done that to him, no one else gets to have control over you, but him.
"Why are you bringing this up now? It has been a very long time ago."
"Because I want you to do the same tonight. As my gift for our wedding anniversary, I wish to watch you hunt, break and cut and then, I want you to fuck me in the blood."
"We are very similar, My Love." he stopped the car, your eyes never leaving him. "I was thinking almost the same." he smiled as the window behind you rolled down.
"Hi there, I like a three-way, 500 for an hour." the woman behind you talked and you finally turned to look at her.
Prostitutes disgusted you, the way they looked at your husband made your blood boil, but you smiled at her. 
"How about a thousand and I get to watch?" Hannibal replied and you smirked.
The woman agreed and got into the backseat, having no idea what she was in for.
"Happy anniversary."
"I love you." you said as he began to drive again.
---
The next morning you wake up in your bed, under the warm sheets with the smell of food filling the air.
You slowly woke up as the blanket fell down your naked body.
You rolled out of bed, and got dressed in one of Hannibal's shirts before heading to the kitchen.
"Good morning." you said as he had his back turned towards you. You rounded the kitchen island and hugged him.
"Morning. I made your favourite for breakfast. Bacon with eggs."
You looked at the meat sizzling in the pan before looking up at Hannibal as he leaned down to kiss you.
"She truly was a pig." 
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komitomi · 1 year
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Hi Komi! I just stumbled upon your account after reading an Alhaitham imagine of yours and it was AMAZING. I wanted to request Alhaitham, Kaveh, and Thoma after finding your G-spot? Thank you!!
that genuinely means a lot to me, thank you so much for liking my work <33 and yes!!
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Finding your gspot :: alhaitham, kaveh, thoma (separate) x afab!f!reader
MDNI, NSFW WARNINGS: fingering (alhaitham, thoma), cunnilingus (thoma), p in v sex (kaveh), slightly mean!alhaitham, virgin!kaveh, gentle!thoma, small bit of fluff at thoma's part, cumming inside (kaveh), using spit as lube (alhaitham), reader is called a whore once (alhaitham) + not proofread.
NSFW UNDER THE CUT
Alhaitham:
You were currently sprawled out on his desk after you decided to tease him by disturbing him while he was focused on his studies, at first you sat on his lap, straddling him as he sat on his chair, but that didn't seem to bring out any reaction so you opted to grinding yourself against him.
Your intentions were to just tease him and be done with it but all that led to was the position you were in right now, alhaitham had you spread out on his desk, gazing at your dripping cunt, you felt extremely embarassed.
He lubed up his finger with his spit before teasing it against your hole and gently shoving it in, you gripped onto the table tightly and clenched your stomach muscles, “Relax.” he coos and you do relax.
That was until he adds another finger and curls his finger inside you, slightly hitting your gspot which ripped a pornographic moan out of you, alhaitham was kind of amused so he pressed harder, which made you arch your back, he smirked lightly at this.
You couldn't help but grind yourself against his fingers, he pumps his fingers in and out of you and doesn't miss hitting your gspot, which eventually makes you cum all over his fingers and the desk.
“tsk, tsk, such a dirty little whore” he clicks his tongue and pulls his fingers out of you before licking them, all that he knew was that those biology lessons definitely paid off that day.
Kaveh:
Kaveh was a virgin obviously, so the first few times you guys had sex it was more experimenting and a little challenging, you yourself haven't had many experiences but you were kind of well-versed, but kaveh? he had no idea what he was doing the first few times and you didn't mind, and guided him through it.
Now imagine his surprise as he was thrusting into you as usual and suddenly he changes angle which makes the tip of his dick brush over a spot that brought a loud moan from you, unlike any he heard before.
He halted not knowing what that was, thinking it caused you pain, but you whined and told him to continue that way, he had obeyed and continued thrusting into you, in the same angle, watching your reactions, he had no idea what it was but definitely knew you liked it.
You for sure would not have believed that he was inexperienced because the way he was thrusting so effortlessly into you right now, and hitting all the right spots while showering kisses on your body seemed like what an experienced person would do, but it all seemed to come so naturally to him, sure it took a little bit of time but hey, it was all worth it.
He continued to thrust into you, watching the way you react to his pacing, “F-faster!” you yell out, throwing your head back, he looks at you before speeding up his pace, you grip onto his shoulder tightly as your high was reaching you, moaning and whining as his cock bullied itself into your hole.
You come undone beneath him, coating his dick with your juices, he was surprised at this but continued to thrust before he finished himself inside you, he pulled out his dick to notice clear and a rather sticky substance on it, he looked back at you to ask you a question but you were laying there panting and tired.
He later learnt that the spot he was hitting which made you react in such a sensitive way was your gspot, and that the clear but sticky substance was your cum, not be confused with your wetness, he never knew women can orgasm like that, he only ever knew about clitoris orgasm, that too which he learnt from you, but never this, he was very fascinated to say the least.
Ever since that accidental discovery, kaveh's game and experience had improved rapidly, and he was proud of it.
Thoma:
“H-ha...! F-fuck right there thoma~!” you moan, throwing your head back, as you grip thoma's hair tightly, his tongue swirling around your bud, kissing it and licking it as if his life depended on it, you grind your hips against his face to match the rhythm of his tongue.
Thoma's hands kept your thighs apart, as he continued making out with your cunt, your hand left his hair and you propped yourself up on your elbows before shifting your entire weight onto one and grabbing his hair again, you looked at him with a dazed expression as he flicked his tongue against your clit before engulfing it with his mouth.
You groaned at the pleasure, you brushed his hair back, pushing away the strands of hair that were slightly tickling you as he ate you out, you felt one of his hands leave your thigh and to your entrance, he pulled away from your clit and shifted on his knees, before pushing one finger into your cunt gently before leaning down once again, to toy with your bud.
“O-oh god!” you moaned as you gripped his hair tighter making him groan, he slowly pushed the finger inside and out of you and added another one inside when he thought you were ready to take it, you gasp and felt your thighs quake.
His fingers were plunged deep inside you as he moved them like an expert, he was searching for your gspot, pressing down at random spots until he felt you shiver against him and let out a whimper, indicating that he found it.
His tongue pressed on your clit simultaneously as his finger pressing against your sensitive spot, you threw your head back and your hand left his hair to grip onto whatever was beneath you.
His tongue moved skillfully against your clit once again, nipping at your bud as he thrusts his fingers deep inside your cunt, you felt your high approaching and you grinded yourself against his face and hand, chasing it.
You felt shockwaves erupt from your body as you reached your high, it wasn't like your any other orgasm, it was more intense, you let out a low scream at the way it came out so harshly, juices gushing out all at once, you took a moment to register as to what happened until you felt thoma pull his fingers out and clean you up with his mouth.
You just squirted all over him, you felt extremely embarassed at it and covered your face with your hands as you laid on your back before you felt thoma on top of you, pulling your hands apart and kissing your mouth, you tasted your high from his mouth, it was salty and sweet at the same time, he pulled away from the kiss and kissed your face insteand.
“Don't be embarassed.” he cooed sweetly while stroking your hair and embracing you.
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redr0sewrites · 2 months
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Can you write Vox x reader where like the reader just says like really unhinged things and just like vile things whenever they rage and stuff like the internet could be slow or smth and the reader is just like “IM GOING TO RIP OFF MY SKIN” idk man I’m kinda just self projecting rn like you can right anything with it tbh idk sorry for rambling anyway you don’t have to do this if you don’t wanna
THIS IS SO MEEEEE I LOVE THIS IDEA SM!!! sorry it took me a hot minute to reply to this i have over 70 hazbin hotel requests in my inbox 😭
🥀Cw: fluff, crack, silly vox
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when he first met you, vox was charmed by your seemingly sweet nature- that is, until you were pissed
your unholy screech of how you were going to rip off your skin if he cut the wifi again was both endearing and confusing in his eyes
vox would just short circuit for a second, just blinking at you while he tries to process what you just said
once it clicks, he just starts giggling. vox very rarely genuinely laughs, most of his laughs are professional or part of the persona he adopts as the leader of vox enterprises, but when he's so shocked by what you just said, he can't control the booming laughter thay fills the room
he's wheezing and gasping, each barking laugh only pissing you off more
"what's so funny? if you keep laughing i am going to fucking break ur fingers like carrot sticks!" you snap, and vox only giggles harder
after a few seconds, you can't help but notice how adorable his laughter is, and soon you don't mind it as much
once you two are officially together, you notice how stressed vox often is, yet how he seems to visibly relax around you
the batshit crazy things you say, which normally disgusts other people, only seem to amuse him
its actually a wonderful dynamic because you bring some spontaneity and slight insanity into vox's otherwise irritating and depressing lifestyle, and vox balances out the crazy things you say and calms you down every time
you often find yourself searching for new phrases to baffle him with, and for new ways to make him laugh
after vox has a stressful day, he enjoys just listening to you ramble about the most insane things and adores hearing whatever fucked up saying you've adopted recently
vox notices himself beginning to copy your speech patterns. he only begins to realize when he slips in an exceptionally odd metaphor into a work meeting and everyone stares at him, yet his heart skips a beat at the thought
there's something so charming to him about the fact that he's adopting your mannerisms, and you truly make him laugh when no one else can
whenever another one of the vees pisses him off, he always comes to you for advice on incredibly deranged comebacks, and you never disappoint!
he's won multiple arguments by just repeating one of your fucked up sayings and the other vees being too lowkey shocked to disagree
vox LOVES IT when you diss people he hates, hearing you ramble some fucked up insults about alastor made him fall in love with you all over again
"that worm on a string fucked up karen cut bob looking ass- if i see him around here again im going to eat a fucking brick" *cue vox looking at you with the biggest heart eyes*
overall, you are both menaces, but you're menaces in love ♥️
vox lay with his head in your lap, the blue light of his screen illuminating the dim room as you rambled mindlessly about your day.
"and THEN, this fucking asshole tried to flirt with me! ME!! as if he doesn't know were dating! ugh, it makes me feel like i have an entire beehive living beneath my skin. i swear if he even looks at me again im going to lick wet cement i can NOT deal. how can you even work with him? he's such a fucking CREEP voxy, i'm going to cut off those ugly ass wings and shove them so far down his throat- hey, are you even listening?"
you look down to see vox half asleep, his eyelids drooping as his light dimmed. "keep talking.." he murmurs, looking up at you with a lazy smile on his face. "you're my favorite person t' listen to.."
i love the idea of vox with a partner who challenges his very idea of power. he clearly wraps himself in a sort of persona, surrounding himself with powerful people and acting like he's so serious and important. i love the idea of him falling in love with someone who can break down his walls in seconds, someone who can dismantle his entire bravado act and who allows him to truly be himself. this is such a wonderful prompt and i am eating this up. nonnie ur awesome!!!!
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kaciidubs · 5 months
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Curious Cat
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❣ Summary: Perhaps being curious wasn't all that bad. ❣  ❣ Word Count: 1.48k ❣ Warnings: Slight Sub! Chris, fluff, smut, comfort, use of safeword, sex toys [vibrators], slight overstimulation, aftercare ❣  ❣ Female! Reader [No use of Y/N] | You/Your pronouns ❣  ❣ Additional Tags: Chan is referred to as Chris, Channie, Baby, and My Love, Reader is referred to as Baby, unedited ❣ Stray Kids Masterlist ❣ General Masterlist
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Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back - and boy, was this cat satisfied.
Chris didn't intend on snooping around your room when you left to get snacks for your impending movie date, nor did he intend to find a few hidden objects in your sock drawer.
Who knew him wanting to coo over your cute Sanrio themed socks would've turned into him holding not one, but two of your sex toys?
"Alright, I think I have every- Why are you holding those?"
His head snapped in the direction of your voice, your hands holding two convenience store bags filled with the snacks you'd promised.
"I-I, um, I didn't mean to-"
"Are you trying to skip the movie and get to the good part of the night?"
The suggestiveness in your tone made his heart skip a beat - sure, he was ready for you no matter what, but he genuinely wasn't trying to come off as entirely horny, he was just curious.
"I wanna watch the movie, really, but..."
Looking down at the toys in his hands, he couldn't help the thoughts brewing in his head; how do you use them? Do you use them by themselves or do you watch the private videos you two have made while touching yourself? Do you use one or multiple in one night? Do they make you come just as hard as he does?
"I... I think I wanna know how these work."
"On me?" You mused, a sly smirk growing on your lips, "Or on you?"
Oh.
Was that even possible? Could your toys work the same on him as they do for you? Could they make him come just as hard as you do?
Chris was curious, some may say too curious for his own good, but he wouldn't let that deter him.
Which is how he found himself now; naked and writhing on your bed as you held a small blue vibrating toy to the leaky head of his cock, the two bunny shaped ears vibrating in a pattern that left him breathless.
The rabbit vibrator, you'd told him - it was your go to for nights where you just wanted to get off and go to bed.
It made his head spin just simply knowing that the toy currently on the flared tip of his dick was also used on your clit.
"How's it feel, baby?" You cooed, the only piece of clothing still on your body being a basic pair of cotton panties. "Feels good, right? I didn't even have to use too much lube with the way you're dripping right now."
He whined out a sound of agreement, too focused on the pulsing of the toy to pay you any mind.
"This next one is new, I haven't even used it on myself yet but that's okay - you can be my little test bunny, yeah?"
"Y-Yes, fuck yes, please." If one toy was able to make him feel this good, then whatever you had planned for him next was more than welcome.
The small, targeted vibrations of the rabbit left his cock, prompting him to open his eyes and look down at you in question before his gaze locked onto the next toy in your hand.
It was bigger, sort of shaped like a microphone, and was slightly intimidating based on the simpler, theme-less design.
"It's a Hitachi wand," you explained, turning it to give him a full view, "it's supposed to have more power than the rabbit, but since I haven't used it yet, I don't know how it's supposed to feel on me - so, make sure you tell me everything you feel, okay?"
Chris nodded, his dick throbbing in anticipation, "Okay, yeah, I will."
You took a moment to coat the soft bulbous tip with lube before turning it toward him; rubbing it along his shaft to give him a general idea of what it feels like while it's not running.
"Ready?"
"R-Ready."
The click of a button was all he could register before a strong wave of vibration forced a choked gasp from his plump lips.
He could feel it everywhere; from the tip of his cock to his abdomen - he could even feel the vibrations in the taughtness of his balls, it was insane.
If it weren't for the fact that you were sitting between his legs, he probably would've been folded like a chair from the pleasure.
"Channie? How's it feel, baby? What is it like?"
His hands fisted the sheets, chest heaving in uneven breaths as he tried his best to collect the brain cells to form words.
"I-It- oh fuck, fuck, it's so- it's everywhere, baby- oh my god don't stop, please don't stop!"
His stomach was coated in precum, his cock leaking in ways you haven't seen before - you were almost jealous it was being wasted on him instead of in you, but that would be fixed later on.
Pressing the vibration button, you kicked up the speed and pressed the toy against the underside of his cock, right against a vein you were graciously familiar with.
The sound he let out was crossed between a grunt and a gasp of air, eyes rolling to the back of his head, and before you knew it, thick ropes of white streaked across his chest and stomach.
It was like he was frozen in time, stuck between breaths and stomach contracting with each wave of cum leaving him, numb to everything but the constant vibrations now spreading throughout his body.
At the same time, you weren't fairing any better; watching in shocked amazement as your usually loud finishing boyfriend was resorted to nothing but choked breaths and twitching limbs. It wasn't until a certain gasped word forced it's way past his lips that you were brought back to reality.
"R-Red- Red-"
You turned the toy off immediately, tossing it behind you as your hands moved to hold his shaking ones, knuckles white from his grip on your sheets.
"Okay, Channie, it's okay - we're all done, yeah?" You could see the faint streak of tears shining down the sides of his face, watching as he tried nodding his head. "You're okay, baby, just take a deep breath with me - slowly, just breathe with me."
He took a shivering inhale, broken between soft hiccups, before sighing it out slowly, his body relaxing just a bit.
"Good boy, just a few more times for me, alright?"
With each breath taken, his body finally relaxed and the tension in his hands released enough for you to slip your hands into his palms, thumbs caressing his undoubtedly sore knuckles.
"You did great, Channie, such a great job - will you be okay if I leave to get a washcloth to clean you up? Do you want me to run a bath?"
Chris shook his head softly, squeezing your hands, "Just... Just a washcloth... A-And some water, please."
Nodding, you leaned down to press a kiss to his right hand, "Alright, baby, I'll be right back."
It only took a few minutes for you to return with the warm washcloth and a bottle of water, gently wiping up the mess of cum from his skin and lube from his softening dick, before helping him sit up to drink.
He finished the water bottle in record time, chugging it as if he just finished a set on stage before letting out a deep sigh, leaning his head against your headrest.
"That was..."
"Intense?"
"Amazing." He laughed lightly, "And intense too, yeah, but it was... I never felt anything like that before, but I feel like if I didn't tap out then, I would've passed out."
Small giggles bubbles from your mouth, shaking your head at his honesty, "Well thank you for letting me know - do you need me to do anything for you? More water? Food? Wanna talk it out some more? Where's your head at, my love?"
A small hum left him as he opened his eyes to gaze at you through a soft haze, "Food sounds great, and we can definitely talk about it more but not before you tell me how you're doing. I'm alright, really, just a little overstimulated - but what about you? I didn't mean to scare you with the safeword."
"You didn't scare me at all! I was just worried about you, trust me - I'm just glad you're okay." Scooting closer to him, you pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek, smiling as he press himself into you. "I'll order the food, you just focus on cooling down, yeah?"
He nodded before looking at you with puppy eyes, "Can we order a pizza?"
Rolling your eyes, you laughed, "Yes, we can order a pizza - find something to watch then we can talk about the toys some more."
With a hum of agreement, you set off to put your date night back on track.
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✧. ┊Tagged lovelies: @goblinracha, @having-an-internal-crisis-rn, @midnightfrog625, @anyhow-everything, @bangchanbabygirlx, @sweetracha, @j-onedrabbles, @happilydeepestwonderland, @nightimescapes, @caitlyn98s, @ch4nn13luv, @ihrtlix, @sometimesleeknows, @jeonjungkookenthusiast1997, @maximumkillshot, @y-ur--i, @acker-night, @dreamescapeswriting, @specialstay, @broken-glowsticks, @s00buwu, @dancerachaslut, @junglyric, @tinyelfperson, @jj-stay, @katsukis1wife, @inlovewithmusician, @keen-li, @armystay89, @main-character0, @vampcharxter
✧. ┊If your username is in bold italics that means tumblr won't let me tag you. If you’d like to be added to the taglist, fill out this form!
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prokopetz · 10 months
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Hey why DO all those old tabletop RPGS and adventure games have such weird obtuse "act in this one scene or softlock forever" moments? Like, these weren't designed like arcade games that munch quarters... Why was this sort of thing so commonplace?
(With reference to this post here.)
Funnily enough, for tabletop RPGs there's actually a good answer.
If you're familiar with the popular history of tabletop roleplaying games, you've probably heard the idea that they developed out of fantasy wargaming. That's not actually terribly accurate; tabletop RPGs and fantasy wargames are more like two parallel branches that split off from the recreating-historical-battles kind of wargaming at about the same time, and for the first couple of decades there wasn't a bright line drawn between them like there is today. Many are genuinely hard to classify by contemporary standards – there are a lot of early fantasy wargames that look more like modern tabletop RPGs, and vice versa.
One of the consequences of that lack of sharp distinctions between tabletop RPGs and fantasy wargames is that early tabletop RPGs were often played in a sort of "competitive co-op" format at wargaming tournaments. Multiple groups would run their parties through the same adventure in parallel, and be ranked on their performance; sometimes this would involve scoring points for completing specific objectives, or speedrunning the adventure and aiming for the fastest time, but the most popular tournament format was the survival module: adventures which were deliberately designed to be unreasonably difficult, with whichever group's last surviving character's corpse hit the ground furthest from the dungeon entrance being judged the winner.
The upshot of that popularity is that many published adventures early on – and certainly the greater part of the more infamous ones! – were originally written as survival modules, created to be run competitively at a particular tournament, and later repackaged and sold as commercial products. Of course, practically none of them actually explained that; like nearly all tabletop RPG material of their day, they were written under the assumption that all tabletop roleplayers had come up through organised play at university gaming clubs, and thus already had all the context I've just outlined. This ended up causing no end of confusion when the hobby's mainstream visibility exploded in the early 1980s, and suddenly there were folks who'd picked up the rulebooks at their local bookstores trying to teach themselves how to play from first principles with no prior contact with gaming club culture.
As for why adventure games were also like that... well, this is going to sound bizarre by contemporary standards, and I don't blame you if you don't believe me, but once upon a time, point-and-click adventure games were considered the gold standard for Serious Gaming. Unforgiving routing, bizarre moon-logic puzzles, and a bewildering variety of unique ways to get yourself killed off were held up as the mark of the serious gamer in much the same way that janky soulslike combat systems are today, and a large chunk of the genre was made to cater to that ethos. Gamer culture is a hell of a drug!
(If you're about to ask the obvious follow-up question, "what changed?", the point-and-click adventure game's fall from grace and subsequent dismissal as casual fluff tracks more or less directly with a large demographic shift in the late 1990s that saw the genre's player base skewing predominantly female – and, well, you can probably connect the dots from there.)
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headcanonenthusiast · 4 months
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Valeria Garza NSFW headcanons. 
This was made with fem readers in mind.
Also quick note, I apologize in advance if this isn't as detailed as my headcanons on some other characters. It was definitely harder for me to come up w/ stuff for Val, especially bc girlie is nowhere near one of my favorites (I'm sorry 😔) but what better way to expand on writing then doing headcanons of characters you rarely think about? So, without further ado, I hope you enjoy! 
(I completely understand that this type of content is not everyone's cup of tea, and that's ok! But, please scroll and ignore if this type of content isn't your thing as opposed to leaving any sort of negative comments.)
NSFW under the cut.
-THE brat tamer.
-Absolutely will not take your shit if you disobey her in any way, shape or form. 
-"What did you just say to me? Do you have any idea who you're talking to?" 
-Gets this look of absolute disbelief on her face if you dare to act like a brat, then her eyes turn dark and she's suddenly dragging you to bed. 
-"I'm the woman who decides whether or not you get to cum every night, querida. And if you're gonna keep acting like a fucking brat, then it looks like you won't get to cum for the rest of the week." 
-Her favorite forms of punishment include anything to do with orgasms. Whether it be edging you, overstimulating you or even denying you the right to cum entirely, she loves making you squirm and beg to release. 
-Shakes her head and clicks her tongue, as if you begging to cum is the most ridiculous thing she's ever heard after you've misbehaved. 
-"Oh, so now you're sorry? Chica, a sorry isn't going to cut it. I warned you about acting like a little brat, but you didn't listen. You never fucking listen to me." 
-Proceeds to lecture you and switch between degrading you in English and Spanish as she either forces a strap down your throat or harshly plays with your clit. 
-"Perra estúpida. Never listening to me and then acting surprised when I don't let you cum." 
-Will also partake in bondage, cuffing up your wrists to the headboard before she runs a vibrator painfully slow over your pussy. 
-As rough as she is when it comes to sex, if you're genuinely feeling upset about something, her gaze will turn more sympathetic (which she refuses to show to anyone besides you.) 
-"What? What's wrong, amor?" 
-And you're welcome to tell her about all of your troubles while she gently eats you out. 
-Probably has multiple straps. Prefers buying the thickest one possible but she does have one that's much longer for when you really piss her off. 
-Is very willing to spoil you with new sex toys and lingerie. Anything to make her pretty girl happy. 
-Also, I feel like she'd switch between wanting to see you touch yourself and not letting you at all. 
-When she's not there with you, she probably encourages you to masterbate and send her tons of videos of you doing so.
-But, if she's actually there and catches you touching yourself, it won't be pretty. 
-"Oh, can I not satisfy you enough anymore? Is that it?" 
-Then she fingers you so well your legs are shaking as she rants. 
-"Look at you, cumming just from my fingers. What a slut."
-"And you really thought you could make yourself cum the same way I do? No, no, estás loca por pensar eso, querida." 
-She wants anything sexual to be completely dependent on either her or toys she picks out for you. 
-In other words, very dominant. 
-In other other words, if you ever asked or God forbid tried to make her submit, you're a dead woman. 
-"Thats it. You're getting too fucking bratty for your own good. Get over my Goddamn lap right now if you know what's good for you." 
-And when you are on her lap, she'll switch between spanking your ass and spanking your pussy. 
-Leaves hickeys on the most visible spots on purpose. 
-Smirks when you get all shy about it, gently brushing your hair away as she chuckles. 
-"Don't worry, amor. I won't make the marks too visible." 
-But then she does, so she buys you the prettiest necklace with her name engraved on it as an apology, and another reminder of who you belong you. 
-Some translations for the Spanish stuff, chica = girl, querida = darling, perra estúpida = stupid bitch, amor = love and "no, no, estás loca por pensar eso, querida" = no, no, you're crazy for thinking that, darling. 
(Also I apologize if anything in Spanish is incorrect, online translators can only get you so far 😕)
Look at me go, writing about a character I don't even like and am not even attracted to because I'm straighter than a wooden ruler 🙃
This was honestly fun to write though! Valeria takes up like 0% of my thinking space, so coming up w/ headcanons for her when I barely remember she exists nor am attracted to her at all was a bit more challenging. Hoping y'all enjoyed this! 
Rudy NSFW headcanons r coming up next, so be sure to lookout for those in the near future 🤭
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natalievoncatte · 3 months
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The storm was blinding. A white torrent fell from the sky in a raging tempest, the likes of which Lena had not seen since she left Metropolis for National City. This was no mere blizzard, but a genuine thundersnow- lighting flashed eerily in the strange pink-white night as thunder buffeted the windows. The Tower’s balcony door was sealed shut against the driving storm.
They were all out there and Lena was here. There was no supervillain this time, at least, not directly- the freak blizzards rolling through Southern California and wreaking havoc on the unprepared people and infrastructure were caused by some asshole calling himself the Weather Wizard, screwing around with the Flash three states away. Lena had seen him on TV; he was a few clicks above a Condiment King-tier villain. One of the joke guys that some cape would take care of on their way to a real fight.
Or he had been, until he got his hands on some tech he wasn’t supposed to have and started punching above his weight class. Lena didn’t care about that. She was thinking about only one thing right now: Kara.
They were all out there. Kara and the others. The city was a mess; people needed heated shelters, the power was out across two thirds of the city, and Kara had already prevent hundreds of deaths on a bridge that was about to collapse from the unexpected weight of snow and the intense cold. The blizzard had come on so fast that the rush our traffic was almost literally frozen right in place.
The city needed its heroes and Lena… Lena was stuck in the Tower. Literally; there was no way to get her home in this mess and she wasn’t going to leave, and she’d sworn off the idea of putting on silly clothes and picking a made up name to go cast spells and deploy gadgets with the others.
She had a feeling… more of a quiet understanding, really, that Kara was against that, even if she never quite said it.
Finally, she saw a shape in the whirling snow as a caped figure walked up to the balcony doors. As Kara stepped inside, a blast of arctic air followed her, chilling Lena to the bone.
Kara was *shivering*.
“Kara?” said Lena. “What’s wrong? I’ve never seen you get cold before.”
“J-just exerting myself,” said Kara. “Alex wants me in the sunbed for a few minutes to charge back up.”
She clearly needed it. Her cape was stiff and crusted with frost and there was snow everywhere, clinging to her hair and brows. She paused for a moment, as she descended the stairs, and looked at Lena. Really looked at her- despite the chill and the frost clinging to her, her eyes were warm, the warm blue of the sky on a summer day.
“Kara?”
“Nothing, sorry,” she said.
Lena watched her pass, feeling a bit off kilter, then rushed to the kitchen. She whipped up some of Kara’s favorite hot chocolate and didn’t spare the whipped cream or a cherry on top, and piled up some donuts and cinnamon rolls beside.
Kara looked haggard, groaning as she laid down under the lamps. Her face lit up brighter than the false suns when she saw the tray Lena carried.
“Oh Rao, I could kiss you for that.”
Lena almost missed a step, smoothly recovering from her stumble instead of dumping it all on Supergirl’s crest. Kara looked at her intently, an unreadable but wide-eyed look on her face.
“I know you’re hungry. Come on, eat.”
“Can’t stay long,” Kara said, between eating entire donuts in two bites, “they need me.”
“I know,” said Lena. “They always do.”
Kara sat quietly for a while, eating, and it made Lena feel more at ease to see some color coming back into her cheeks, even if the snowmelt wetted her hair. Absently, Lena brushed a damp lock out of Kara’s eyes.
“Are you going back out?”
Kara nodded. “I have to. They need me in five places at once. The city is completely unprepared for something like this.”
“I wish I could help.”
“You are helping.”
Lena sighed. “I could do more, you know. I’m starting to master the magic, and now that the Foundation is going strong, I can whip up tech pretty fast.”
Kara sighed and sat up. “I know, but I need you here. I can’t be distracted by worrying about your safety all the time.”
“You wouldn’t say that to Alex. Or J’onn. Or Nia.”
Kara let out an exasperated sound, but her voice was very soft. “It’s different when it’s you.”
Lena tried to swallow but her throat clenched, and she fought down the sensation of her heart doing a backflip. Kara rose from the bed and stood to her full height, and Lena was once again taken aback by how dashing and heroic she looked in her suit, like a modern day knight. It made her feel strangely small in a way that she didn’t dislike.
Kara carefully took Lena’s hands in her own, tenderly rubbing the pads of her thumbs over Lena’s knuckles, sending chilling shocks up her arms.
“Stay here, okay? I’ll be right back.”
“I’ll be waiting for you.”
Kara nodded and departed, rushing out of the Tower and back into the storm.
She was gone for hours again. Everyone checked in with Lena periodically, and eventually, Lena found a couch to lay on and curled up under a cardigan as a blanket. J’onn made this place much more comfy than the DEO, she gave him that.
Kara breezed back in sometime after dawn, trudging back inside, ice-caked and frost-encrusted, pale and worn down. She headed right for the kitchen.
Lena padded after her in her stocking feet.
Kara sighed. “Alex, Nia, and Brainy at helping with the shelters. J’onn is out there… there’s roof collapses and accordion wrecks and fires and people trapped. It’s going to be days of this, cleaning it up. How does a blizzard start fires.”
Planting a hand on the fridge, Kara leaned on it and sighed.
“How much time do you have?”
“Now that the sun is up, I don’t need the bed. I can just pop up above the cloud cover if I need it. I just wanted to get warm for a minute.”
“Sit,” said Lena.
Kara sat. Lena made more hot chocolate. The donuts had run out, so Lena tore open more of the little powdered cocoa packets and kept on making more until Kara waved her off.
“Are you getting warmed up?” said Lena.
The way Kara looked at her spoke volumes, but Lena couldn’t read them.
“Yes. I have to go.”
“Okay, but after this is over, you owe me some alone time.”
Kara smiled. “It’s a date.”
They both froze. It was a common phrase, an ordinary idiom, but it felt like something had just… unveiled itself, like fog rolling back from an unknown, verdant country. Kara was blushing scarlet.
“I’ll be back.”
“Wait,” said Lena.
She had to do this before she lost the nerve. She rushed around the kitchen island and rushed to Kara’s side, pressing a hand on her shoulder, and rose up on her tippy toes to press a kiss to Kara’s cheek- or rather, the side of her mouth, just this side of a real kiss. Kara went stock still and Lena thought for a moment that she’d done something terrible, misread the moment, but she could roll it back, play it off as a friendly gesture.
A hand, soft as silk and warm as honey, cupped Lena’s cheek and tilted her chin up, so her gaze met the boundless depths of Kara’s eyes, so full of welling emotion that Lena could drown in them.
“Wait for me.”
“I will.”
Then she was gone, giving herself back to the tempest outside.
Lena waited for her. It was hours again. The snow finally slowed, the sky beginning to lighten as the artificial snow weather patterns shifted back to normal and nature reasserted itself. The city would be in for a shock- it was going to be in the seventies by the next day.
Kara looked utterly worn out when she came back, finally, trudging down from the balcony with her shoulders slumped and her hair hanging in ragged wet clumps from her head as her cape drooped with moisture.
“You waited,” she said.
“I did. Let’s get you dry, huh?”
Lena worked a towel over Kara’s head, more than a little jealous as the effortless way her golden hair formed those beautiful lose curls as the water was wrung out of them, giving her a salon perfect finish with absolutely no work.
One that was done, Kara merely had to remove her suit to shed the rest of the water in a puddle at her feet, leaving her standing there in sweats and a cute fluffy kitten shirt that she had first ironically gifted to Lena and then stolen back, but only after Lena had worn it a few times.
“I’m so tired,” said Kara.
“I know, darling,” said Lena. “Plenty of places to get some rest here. J’onn made his superhero hideout cosy.”
“I don’t want to rest,” said Kara.
Lena’s heart began to pound. She knew deep down that she wanted this, but it seemed so distant and remote that she’d nearly given up even fantasizing about it. Now that Kara had revealed her identity, she no longer changed her posture or body language around Lena and stood tall, shoulders reared back and her lithe, impressive physique on full display even in cheesy loungewear.
Kara took the first step, drawing up into Lena’s space and crossing an invisible boundary, once first laid out over a brunch that was both tense and pleasant, and had been pushed and stretched and nearly broken so many times it could hardly be said to exist at all, and yet the moment she did, it was clear what was happening.
Kara was not putting her arms around Lena’s waist in a platonic gesture. The embrace she pulled her into was not what friends are for. The natural way they slotted together and Kara brushed her lips against Lena’s to ask permission was in no way friendly.
Lena rose a little on the balls of her feet and turned whatever this was into a real kiss, and Kara kissed her back. Kara’s hands roamed down over Lena’s backside before she realized what she was doing and the shot back up to a chaste spot on Lena’s back, prompting her to giggle into Kara’s mouth.
“Miss Danvers,” said Lena, “did you just grab my ass?”
“I… umm…”
Lena grinned. “Yes. Just say yes.”
“I actually wanted to ask you out on a real date first.”
Lena snorted. “Kara, we’ve been on a date for five years. Now, pick me up and carry me somewhere private already.”
Grinning, Kara picked her right up off her feet.
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hitomisuzuya · 4 months
Text
Gamer!Scaramouche x fem!reader. Fluffy fluff fluff Humor. Scara laughing and being in love.
I do intend to write smut later, but this idea popped into my head. The image of this man bursting out into genuine laughter at something he thought was really funny is just 🥰😌 Inspired by a Tik Tok and directional confusion for the Seelie event.
As good as Scaramouche was at video games, he had his off days like everyone else (it made him pissy to admit it). He was missing shots that he normally made easily while he was live streaming a first person shooter game.
"Your aim sucks today, my love," You said, grinning as you came into view on the camera to kiss his cheek.
His cheeks turned a dark crimson. "Yeah, whatever. You think you can do better?" The blushed darkened more when a few messages popped up in the chat box saying things like, "Hey look, Scara's wife is here!"
"Get your eyes back in your heads, fools," He snarled a little at the screen.
"Hmph, I probably could do better," You said, crossing your arms and looking away from him. He knew your blustering was to cover up how shy you felt.
Scaramouche sat back and handed you the controller. "Okay, let's see it then," He looped an arm around your waist, pulling you into the spot he enjoyed having you the most when you played games on a live stream with him: his lap.
"Fine, you'll be putting your money where your mouth is," Settling onto his lap, a little bit of a nervous smile on your face, you took the controller. It always made you a little nervous to live on camera with him. His fingers rubbed at your hip soothingly.
Now, whenever you played a game with him on a stream, there were a lot of moments where it showed that Scaramouche is genuinely in love with you.
The way he beamed at you with pride when you made a perfect shot. If you looked unsure of when to shoot, he put his hands on yours and helped you aim. "That's my girl," He praised, running his fingers through your hair. Seeing the cute way your cheeks flushed from his praise made his heart flutter.
Now you were at a point in the game where you had to consult a map to see where to go. Except, something just wasn't clicking with you. You flip flopped between looking at the map in your inventory and the mini map, saying "That looks like where I need to go, but I am not sure.."
You did this a few times, going to different parts of the map and looking totally confused when you realized it was the wrong area. "I..I don't understand..I thought that's where I needed to go. Maybe I should go back the way I came.."
Suddenly, Scaramouche snorted and burst into laughter. "I can't help it. You just look so cute, and so stupid, I just can't," He could barely finish his sentence around the laughter.
You stopped playing and looked at him with a soft smile on your face. Scaramouche was genuinely laughing at something he thought he was funny. Not scoffing and making fun of it with a glare on his face, but genuine laughter with the most beautiful grin on his face.
It was a moment to live for.
You sighed and handed him the controller. "Wanna put me out of my misery?"
Scaramouche wipes some tears from his eyes. "Glady, by the way, you ran right by the area you were supposed to go to three times," He snickered as he marked the right place on the map.
"I..what?" You sputtered, "And you didn't say anything--" Scaramouche cut you off with a long, slow kiss on your lips.
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Do you have any other funny snake dating mishap stories?! The last one is absolutely hilarious. Or even just regular snake mishap stories you'd like to share?
You guys have no idea how hard being a herpetologist can be on your dating life, honestly.
Once had a guy not tell me he was afraid of snakes (not even just a little nervous, actual phobia) until two dates in, and, like, he was a nice guy but there's just no way that's working out because he couldn't even look at snakes and I have a lot of snake-based home decor and I didn't want to accidentlly commit psychological warfare on the poor guy who would see a huge TV screen with a snake screensaver the instant he stepped into my house
Clicked with a guy at a bar and promptly got into a long argument because he thought snakes don't have bones. Dude literally asked to see my degree because he was so sure I was wrong
First date, when I mentioned what I did, dude actually said "yuck." I couldn't mask my facial expression of absolute dismay and we called it a night, citing irreconcilable differences
One dude thought it was cool until I said I don't feed my snakes live food, was genuinely disappointed about that. Dodged a bullet early with that one
One guy tried to impress me by asking to hold a snake while being obviously very nervous about it, he literally made little squeaking noises and jumped every time the snake moved so I did not let him hold her as I was worried he'd toss her across the room if she moved too much
I guess my conclusion is I wish there was a dating app for herpetologists.
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grippingbeskar · 1 year
Text
old partners, new plans
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— joel miller x fem!reader
—warnings: explicit content minors dni (oral m receiving, mxf) swearing, very minor dom!joel but it’s like not an established thing
—a/n: back at it!!! hope you guys enjoy! i love writing for joel sm. he so sexy <3
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“That was not the deal.” You growl, squaring your shoulders.
“Deals change.” Is all the reply you get, Joel still leaning against the frame of your door. You can hardly see him there, the dark of night shrouding him in something akin to mystery— at least, he would be mysterious if you hadn’t already seen every inch of him.
“You know that’s not fair, Joel. I’ve waited ages for this opening, and I’m fucked without the pills to trade.” You take a step towards him and lower your voice, knowing people have been hung in the centre of town for even thinking about leaving, let alone having an entire plan like you did. Or had. “I need to get to them.”
“You don’t even know they’re out there.” You bite back a laugh, turning away from him. You hear the click of the door behind you, and Joel sounds louder as he finally steps into your house. “This is a bad idea— always has been. You got no proof, no solid plan… you’re fucked with or without the pills.”
“Oh, because you’re so sure Tommy’s still alive? That plan is so well thought out— huh?”
“That’s different.”
“No, it’s not! My family is out there, and they’re waiting for me. I know they are. I’ve had this plan for months— months, Joel! You know what this means, and you choose now of all times to hold out on me?!” You shout now, head under his chin staring up at him.
“I’m not holdin’ out, there’s nothin’ I can do about it. My guy ain’t getting back for a week, and I can’t just pull strings I don’t have.” Your heart plummets. The look in his face seems genuine— broken, sad… but it doesn’t make you any less angry. “I can’t help you.”
“But you were fine taking my batteries and tools. And my route to the outside for the last six months. All that you were happy to take me up on, but now it’s time to pay and you’re suddenly empty? I don’t buy it, Joel.” You say his name harshly, with none of the need and honey-like sweetness you remember from those few months of bliss before you told him you were getting out. Before he iced you out completely. “I can’t believe you’re doing this. As what— some kind of pay back?”
“You know that’s not—“
“Why? Because I’m not sleeping with you anymore? That’s fucking low, even for you. And you are the one that stopped that, not me, so don’t blame your blue balls on me just cause you can’t deal with the inevitable.” You suck in a quick breath, wishing you could take the words back.
Oh, he’s fucking angry now. Before he was letting you rant, letting you yell at him because he knew he was in the wrong but something about your comment made him flip.
Neither of you had mentioned what happened. How that night, when you told him you were leaving, he just got up and left your bed, never coming back. Sure, you were blunt and maybe a little harsh when you told him you were going, but he didn’t even look at you for a week. Only when you went to him to ask for the last piece of your escape plan, he managed to look at you, but even then he was short and harsh like you had been. Like you’d done something to him personally— left him cold and alone in a giant bed, words you never got to say still stuck in your throat. How he never gave you a chance to finish, to explain, to ask him to come with you. Find both of your families.
It was the first time you’d really spoken at all since then— conversations that used to be never ending and comforting turning to surface level communication, only speaking when necessary. Sure, you were shouting at each other right now but at least you were talking. Anything was better than silence.
“Don’t you ever fucking say that to me. Don’t you dare tell me I had anything to do with you leavin’. You did this to yourself— to us.” He didn’t yell, but you sort of wish he had, because the low, growling tone of his voice was somehow ten times worse. “You were the one who wanted to leave. I never—“
“You don’t have to remind me.” You don’t let him finish the thought, instead cutting him off and diverting your eyes to the fists at his side, straining with fury. His knuckles were bruised, either from work or a side gig he didn’t tell you about. He never told you about anything anymore.
“I got no pills. I’ll dump ‘em in the old spot when they come in. Try not to get yourself killed ‘til then.” He turns to leave, and you feel your stomach flip. This will be the last time you see him if he comes through. The last time you spoke.
“Okay, I’m sorry.” He laughs bitterly, shaking his head. “Hey— I didn’t meant that, alright? You really want to leave it like this?”
“You’re going. Probably gonna die out there. What’s the point in talking about it?” You want to yell, want to fight him on it but he wouldn’t even listen— “You’re signin’ your death sentence outside of these walls alone. Don’t blame me for not giving you the push.”
“Joel, just wait a second.” His hand stills as it moved to grab the door. “I don’t… I don’t want to leave you like this. I never wanted to leave you. If you just let me—“
“You made that bed weeks ago.” He stares ahead, never letting you finish and still not turning around to look at you. Your heart freezes at the thought of him walking out that door. You want to leave— but you never wanted to do it alone. Even after weeks of silence and rough edges, you’d take any time with him over… well, anything.
“Let me unmake it. Just… please don’t walk out on me, Joel.” You take a few tentative steps, gauging the progress you’ve made. His spine straightens when your fingers dance up his back, gentle and slow. You catch the bottom of his shirt and slip under, feeling the warmth of his skin under your palm and the way he sighs— as if your touch relieves him. “I hated how I went about… things. I never meant to have it turn out like this. Us ignoring each other.”
“Well, that’s what happened.” His head turns ninety degrees, eyes looking over his shoulder as you walk your fingers higher. His shoulder blades, always full of tension, relax under your hand, and you trail your other hand up to find the other, watching his eyes flutter closed as you dig your palms into the muscle there.
“I know. It was unfair of me to spring it on you that night, and I shouldn’t of said the things I did. I’m sorry.” He doesn’t say anything, but he sighs again as you continue to manipulate his muscle. You wish he’d take his shirt off so you could do it properly, but this would do for now. “But you never let me finish— that day.”
“I heard…fuck. I heard what I needed to hear.” His head drops down, chin to his chest as you step up on your toes and massage him in slow, steady circles. You hadn’t touched him in so long, you were nearly burning with just this intimacy alone, but you had to bide your time. Coax him in slowly, like a scared lone wolf— tempt him closer with paced, quiet movements until you could get your chance.
“Let me fix it. Fix this.” You say softly, your heart slamming against your chest.
“You’re still leaving. Can’t fix that.” His voice strains, and you run your hands lower to dig into the muscle of his back.
“Yeah.” He sighs again at your answer. “And you still hate me for it.”
“Yeah.” He copies you, and you try to ignore how much the simple word affects you.
“But we still have right now.”
“What’s the— shit, that’s good.” He shuffles back into your touch. “What the point?”
“Cause I can make you feel so much better than this. Don’t you remember?” You are nearly begging, but if memory serves you right, a few ‘pleases’ seem to make him do just about anything. “This is just my hands, but my mouth… my—“
“Yeah. Yeah, I fucking remember. Think about it every night.” You run your hands up again, but this time take his shirt with you and bring it up over his head. He moves, finally, grabbing the collar and shucking it off his shoulders, letting the fabric pool at his feet in front of the door.
“Let me make it up to you. Please, Joel.” He groans when you press harder, feeling how his muscles have gone nearly placid under your touch now. “Even if it’s just tonight. If you still hate me, you can leave and not look back, but I… I can’t stand this thing we have going on. The quiet. I can’t do it. Please.”
He turns around, towering over you as a mass of unkept, wild curls and a burning need in his eyes. It makes you smile, that look in his eye— because it’s been so long since he’s looked at you with anything other than hatred. Now, he needs you. Needs what only you can give him, and even if this could be the last night of it, you couldn’t help but think it would last forever with how heavy his gaze was.
“You wanna make it up to me?” He’s tilting his head in question, watching your hands move up and down his torso in teasing strokes.
“Please, Joel.” You see it splinter, his final plank of resolve shredding and dispersing on your floor under the weight of your words. Your voice nearly cracks with desperation— you need it as badly as he does.
“Get on your knees.” You blink at him, your fingers trailing down his toned chest before nodding and obeying his command readily. Joel was always a giver— always spending hours on you and you alone, and he fucking loved it— but tonight you had all but begged him to take. Lose a little bit of that control he clings so tightly to, watch the tension loose from his shoulders as he forgets about everything but you.
You trail your lips along his lower stomach as you sink to your knees, eyes never leaving his— ones that have practically turned onyx black as he watches your path, chest rising and falling rapidly. He moves his leg before you hit the ground, and it’s not until your bare knees settle into something a little softer than hard wood floor that you realise he’s kicked his shirt under you.
Even when he acted the part of hating you— he never stopped thinking of you.
Your fingers shake as they fumble with his belt, Joel making no move to help you as you struggle with the loops. When you finally break it free, Joel’s hand reaches down and threads your hair through his fingers. His thumb trails the highest point of your cheekbone, and your eyes flutter as you involuntarily nuzzle into his touch. It’s comforting and warm, and the intimacy of him knowing how you like to be touched even on your face has your cheeks burning. You think you catch him smile at you, and then your focus snaps back to the sight right at your eye-line when you pull his boxers and jeans down in one go.
“Missed your cock, Joel. Fuck.” You are nearly mesmerised at him in front of you, words spilling out as he stands in front of you completely naked while you remain fully clothed. He groans, head rolling back as you wrap your hand around his base.
“I bet you did. Can remember how loud you used to be— I fucking loved that.” Even if the compliment is purely physical, compared to how little you’ve gotten from him it boosts your ego through the roof. You can’t wait any longer, wrapping your lips around the tip of his straining cock. “That’s it, darlin’.”
You don’t tease him, but you do start slow. Despite how much you want to suffocate on him, have him fuck out any of that hate he’s still holding so he can’t think of anything but your mouth, you know he likes it to start slow. It’s like he’s denying himself, even here, that he doesn’t deserve the instant gratification. Like he wants to suffer through it first— a little bit of pain to accompany the overwhelming pleasure that follows.
“Fuck, you’re good. Just like that.” He praises, his hand sneaking back to the nape of your neck. Not pushing, but instead gathering your hair and using his fist as a make shift ponytail. “Missed your mouth.”
“Mm?” You make a muffled noise, hoping to God he keeps telling you how much he missed any part of you. Like he dragged through the last few weeks as poorly as you did. You were already fizzling in your stomach, your thighs clenching together with every swirl of your tongue around the head of his cock.
“Thought about you every day. Every— fuck. Nothin’ gets me off like you. Ha-ah, shit.” You take him to the back of your throat, gagging a little but loving every choked sound sound that stutters out of Joel’s mouth. “Had to fuck my fist thinkin’ about your pretty little face. Fuckin’ hated myself for it.”
You speed up, wanting nothing more than for him to yank you upwards and bend you over the counter, but you’ll take what you can get. The salty taste of him mixes on your tongue, and it’s always so messy giving him head, but he goes feral for it. He’s watching you now, the words punched out of his chest as you move your hand to match your mouth, and you know the tears in your eyes and strands of hair across your face just send him wild.
He says your name how you remember, with all the sweet and drawn out inflections his accent gives it. You take him deeper, indulging a low and dormant urge to please him clawing it’s way to the front of your brain. He groans again, the hand at the back of your head pressing just slightly— a sign he’s losing that last bit of self control.
“Fuck— stop, baby. Stop.” He splutters out, and you draw yourself back slowly. He keeps his hand in your hair, looking down at you possessively. His chest is moving rapidly, trying to catch his breath from where you had him so close. Your eyebrows furrow, confused as to why he didn’t let you do the one thing you really wanted to right now. Make him feel good.
“What’s wrong?” You say softly, and he hauls you upward, barely giving you time to find your footing before he surges forward and kisses you.
It nearly knocks you off your feet, the hunger behind it making you stumble a few steps to where you know the bed is. He wastes no time, tasting himself on your tongue and taking you with him down onto the mattress. He pulls your shirt off first, kissing his way down to where your hips are still covered by sweat pants.
It’s here he takes his time, watching you writhe with impatience as he slowly draws the fabric down. He kisses your hipbones as they are revealed, the gentle touches making your head spin. He was meant to hate you— meant to be fucking you hard and fast just one more time to get it out of his system, so that you felt like what you two had could end on some kind of high. You owed him that much.
But this? The way his hands were so soft and gentle— practically caressing along your sides and over your thighs. The care behind his movements, the way he looked at you… it wasn’t how you used to fuck. This wasn’t hard and dirty, not scratching an itch or quenching a thirst— this had something more behind it. You knew it, and by the way he smiled over you, he did too.
“You’re so fucking beautiful.” He whispers against your skin, the rough hair on his cheeks tingling the softness of your inner thighs. He says it quietly, like you weren’t supposed to hear it, but you do, and your body floods with heat.
“Joel.” You whimper, your underwear dragging down your legs before he crawls back up your body. “Joel, I’m sorry.”
“I know, baby. Just focus on me, okay?” You feel him against you, the head of his cock dragging up and down causing your hips to twitch every time. “You always get so wet from doing that, don’t you?”
“Just from you. It’s just you, Joel.” You whimper, and his face crumbles in front of you. He bends to kiss you again, the air in your lungs sucked out leaving you breathless. He’s handling you with such care— like he still does. Care.
When he pushes into you, you both sigh, Joel dropping onto his forearms caging you under him. He tucks his head into the crook of your neck— teeth dragging along your collar bone with each slow thrust.
“You always feel so good. Can’t live without this, baby.” He’s almost whining, grinding into you with so much strength you hear the bed creak with each move. He’s reaching every nerve you have, crackling each one with a searing pleasure that’s only ever associated with him.
“N-neither. Please— please, Joel.” You beg for something, anything he’d give you, and his head moves to press his forehead to yours. His hips stutter, eyes half lidded but focused on you.
“Don’t leave. I’ll… god, so good. Don’t go.” He fucks you a little harder, like he’s trying to prove a point. Trying to convince you— but he doesn’t have to.
“Come with me.” You whisper, hands threading into his hair. You tug hard, making him groan.
“Baby.” He says lowly, voice grating and strained. Every thrust of his hips hurtles you closer to release, one of his hands snaking down your body to circle your clit. You can’t talk anymore, the only noises you can make are loud moans followed by choked out versions of his name. “Fuck— fuck, I can’t last. I can’t..”
You squeeze your eyes shut, pleasure rolling over you from your fingertips to your toes, the weight of Joel’s body keeping you firmly secured on the mattress. It’s like the heavy press of his warm skin multiplies the feeling, nails digging into the flesh of his back.
Your orgasm sneaks up on you, and it only takes a few more strokes of Joel’s cock and he’s cumming with you, both of you clinging to each other as you try to draw out the others high. Even when you’re supposed to be fighting, each of you are doing anything and everything for each other.
Joel still feels warm above you, keeping himself inside as long as he can stand before he pulls out slowly. You whimper from the loss, but he shuts you up with a deep, desperate kiss. It’s lazy and meaningful— teeth and tongues clashing from how hard he’s pressing on top of you.
Both of you are sweaty and out of breath, but neither can find the strength to pull your mouths away from each other. You know once you do, it was meant to be over— but it couldn’t be. There wasn’t going to be a version of this story where you missed out on the only good, real thing you’ve had in a long time just because you didn’t have the guts to repeat yourself. You pull back from his mouth as hard as it is, and he groans a little in frustration of having to chase you.
“Joel…” Your hands find their way up to his face, holding him so close that your noses bump together. “I meant it. Come with me.”
“Darlin’, I gotta… Tommy needs me to find him. I…” He looks you up and down again, eyes catching on the little hickeys he’s left over your chest and neck, and you think he might be considering the possibility of leaving everything behind and just following you despite it.
But you’d never ask him to. You had this thought out— and if he’d just listened to you the first time, he would already know.
“I know. We can find him. The pills— I’m trading it for a full tank of gas for a car I repaired. It’s just outside the safe zone.” He shifts up, thighs still straddling over your waist. “We can find him, find my family.”
“You fixed a… of course you did. Fixed a fucking car right under their nose.” He shakes his head, laughing before leaning down and smothering you in a suffocating kiss. He’s still smiling when he pulls away, tucking your body into his chest. “Jesus. You’re unbelievable.”
“I would of told you.” You say, not having the nerve to look up at him. “That night— I tried to tell you. We have people that need us, but I need you, too.”
“Mm.” He says, burying his face into your hair. You can feel the smile in the way he hums, his hands grabbing at your sides and holding you closer. “Need you, too.”
“What was that?” You try to turn and look up at him, a teasing smirk on your face but he doesn’t let you. “The Joel Miller— needs me?”
“Need your car.” He grumbles and you laugh harder, your legs tangling together in a comforting knot of limbs. “When do we leave?”
“When you get the pills.” He hums again.
“Tomorrow. I’ll get ‘em tomorrow.”
“Oh, you fucking asshole. You were getting them the whole time, weren’t you?” He still refuses to let you move, strong arms keeping your bodies together. He doesn’t say anything, just laughs and nods before his breathing starts to slow.
You wanted to turn and see his face when he said that— that he needed you. But as you feel him go limp behind you, you figure you’ll get enough time to stare at his face when you drive across the state to get Tommy, and whatever comes after that. You might not know what comes next, but whatever it is, you feel a hell of a lot better knowing it’ll be with him.
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