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#frog faunus!Ren
rwby-encrusted-blog · 5 months
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Bandit A: HAH! All tied up, and there's nothing you can do about it!
Jaune: Man, I really didn't think we'd get captured.
Nora: Sorry! I took melatonin and fell asleep During my watch!
Bandit B: Y'all ain't seemin' all dat concerned 'bout being Roped up.
Frog Faunus!Ren: You touched me without gloves; We aren't concerned about anything other than tracking down your dead bodies.
Bandit A: What's that supposed to mean?
Jaune: Well he's a frog faunus?
Bandit B: What? Some Warts gonna take us out?
Ren: No, the Poison will.
Bandit A: P-Poison?
Bandit B: Oi, keep yer head on. Blondie and Shorty 'ave been touchin him the whole time.
Nora: Oh! We've built up a resistance!
Bandit A: Poison?
Ren: Yes, I am specifically a Poison Dart Frog Faunus. It's why I am very averse to crowds. You are likely beginning to feel the numbness.
Bandit A: IS THAT WHAT THAT IS!
Bandit B: HEY! Keep calm, ye dunce!
Ren: Yes, breathe while you still can before the toxins halt your diaphragm.
Bandit A: SHITSHITSHIT! Is there an antidote!?!?!
Ren: There's a local herb that can save your life. It is a White Flower with Red thorns, and boiling it into a tea, then rubbing it into the afflicted area, as well as drinking it, will prevent the poison from killing you. You only have until Day breaks, So I would get a move on.
Bandit A: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!
Jaune: You don't seem all that concerned.
Bandit B: I'm NOT! I'm Pissed now tho-
Ren: *Spits in Bandit's mouth*
Bandit B: GEH! *Hack! COugh!* Ah- Eh Why's it so Bitter!
JNR: Toxins.
Ren: You should join your friend You have far less time than him though.
Bandit B: I-eeeeh- cah- cah! MAH TUNG! THIt! *Sprinting away* MAW-ER PHUGGER!
Ren: Huh. Must've been allergic to my tea.
Ruby: Hey guys! I'm ba- Why are you tied up?
Jaune: Just Bandits. Nice Bluff Ren!
Ren: Thank you.
Fun Fact! Poison Dart Frogs don't produce their own toxins, rather they eat toxic Insects (Such as Centipedes) and secrete it through their skin. If you keep a true poison dart frog and restrict its diet from having toxic bugs, it will be safe to handle.
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howlingday · 10 months
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Food Chain
Ruby: (Bird Faunus, Feathers ruffled) EVERYONE STAY BACK!
Nora: (Frog Faunus, Palms extra sweaty) What do we do?!
Ren: (Serpent Faunus, Tail tip swiping about) I don't know! This is awful!
Oscar: (Sitting in the kitchen, Reading) Hm?
Ruby: I need to go to the kitchen, but he's right there!
Nora: Ren, help!
Ren: What am I supposed to do?!
Jaune: (Elephant Faunus, Walking by, Stops) What's going on? I thought Ruby was making lunch.
Ruby: S-Sorry, Jaune! There's a...
Jaune: (Sees Oscar, Deadpan)
Jaune: (Walks over)
Oscar: Hey, Jaune! What's- Whoa!
Jaune: (Carrying Oscar) Your room is a mess.
Oscar: I-It is? Oh, uh, can it wait until after-
Jaune: No. (Carries Oscar up to his room, Places him down) When lunch is ready, I'll come get you.
Oscar: Oh, uh, thanks. (Shuts door)
Jaune: (Turns, Being stared at by RNR) You guys are aware that frogs, snakes, AND birds eat mice, right?
Ruby: Ugh! (Walks away)
Nora: Gross! (Walks away)
Ren: (Shakes head, Walks away)
Jaune: ...
Jaune: (Deep breath)
Jaune: (Shakes hands, Dancing about) EW! EW! EW! EW! I NEED TO BURN MY GLOVES!
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miso-vicious · 4 years
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RWBY Volume 7 Chapter 2 & 3
SPOILERS
Greetings. Due to me staying up for the full 24 hours for Rooster Teeth Extra Life and surviving on 5 hour energy, chocolate, and water, I got real sick. I lost the will to write an analysis of Chapter 2, especially for an episode that was fairly slow, but still full of information. Which is why I will be reviewing both Chapter 2 and Chapter 3 this week. So for like the 20 something people that will skim read this post, strap in. This was a pretty heavy week.
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Same as always, this post contains several SPOILERS. Do not read unless you are completely caught up on the show.
Love Will Thaw A Frozen Heart
We had a beautiful reunion between our second favorite sister duo, which was very heart warming, but we still have to wait for the big Schnee reunion.
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And now that Ironwood possesses the first Relic, the group now has the upper hand on Salem. Salem has lost her only Maiden, the Spring Maiden is in the wind, and apparently, Ironwood has the Winter Maiden secured and in “stable” condition. According to Qrow, “She’s no spring chicken.” So that must mean that she’s an elderly woman with declining health. That means we’re back to where we were in Volume 3, they have to secure a new vessel for the new Winter Maiden. Either they will take the gamble and hope that whomever the current Winter Maiden chooses to inherit the power gets the power. Or they will do the soul merger machine plan that they tried to force upon Pyrrha. If we were to take a guess as to who would be Ironwood’s Champion, it would have to be Winter. While Penny does have a soul, there’s no telling what would happen to the power if she were to die. The only other person Ironwood trusts just as much as Qrow or Ozpin is Winter. It’s unclear if the machine could transfer the Maiden power to a male host, but that would be an interesting thought.
I Have No Heart, And So I Must Be Very Careful
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Now, Irondaddy has been making his own plans since we’ve last seen him. With Ozpin “gone”, Ironwood has been his own moral compass. The embargo and recall of the Atlas military was only the first step of his master plan. Now that the Relic of Knowledge and Creation and the Winter Maiden are secure, the next step is to reestablish communication between the Kingdoms.
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By building a new CCT tower on top of Amity Arena, it will act as a form of satellite. It will float above the clouds, higher than any Grimm can reach, and will still provide global communication even if another tower were to be destroyed. The next step is to tell the world about Salem.
That isn’t one the best plans this show has thrown at us. Ozpin has kept Salem a secret for hundreds of years. Beyond keeping his own shameful part of her evil reign a secret, the other reason was because of the inevitable chaos that would occur if the people found out there was this all powerful Goddess out there hell bent on the destruction of the world. But that’s a gamble Ironwood is willing to take apparently! His military are supposed to run damage control once the inevitable chaos breaks out among not only Atlas and Mantle, but the whole world.
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Ruby made the executive decision to keep certain truths from Ironwood. Including Ozpin’s true past with Salem, Ozpin’s disappearance, Jinn being out of questions, Salem being allegedly unbeatable, and her Silver Eyes. With good reason, we have no idea what Ironwood would do with this information. Our heroes almost quit after hearing all of this, Ironwood has the world’s strongest army at his disposal. He might have a more violent reaction, and decide to go after Salem with everything he has. Ironwood is already in a volatile state, Dr. Pietro has already testified to his current paranoia. And based on the opening alluding to Jacques Schnee adding fuel to the fire, Ironwood is being manipulated into putting the needs of Atlas above the rest of the world. Of course, he seems completely level headed now. He even gave the Relic back to Ruby, offered them safe harbor in the Academy, and has basically gave them his blessing to be unofficial Huntsmen.
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Ironwood even gave Qrow a super awkward hug, like a man who has never been hugged his whole life but has always wanted to try it.
A New Plan
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So the next step is to reclaim an abandoned dust mine that has been taken over Grimm. (It’s insinuated that this is the same Schnee Dust Mine cave in that killed several Faunus, including Ilia’s parents). The dust mine will serve as a launch sight for Amity Arena and the dust inside is needed by the science team, until it’s clear, the CCT tower cannot launch. Why that is, why they can’t just find a new launch sight is not made clear. But this is what we have to work with.
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That’s when we get our big glow up reveal, and they all look fantastic. Like, Yang’s detachable pant legs, Weiss’ excessive belts, Ruby’s steel toe boots, Blake’s new hair, I am literally living for this.
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Now our team is outfitted with new tricked out scrolls. The scrolls track their vitals and aura levels, and are synced up to one another. So everyone can check on each other on the field. And if Ironwood hasn’t outfitted their scrolls with listening devices to eavesdrop on them, I will be severely disappointed in him. In this episode alone, they have talked about literally everything they’re hiding from Ironwood. Imagine all of the recordings of them being thrown back in their face.
One of the moments is between Ruby and Oscar.
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Oscar was left behind at the academy, but before they leave, Ruby entrusts the Relic to Oscar. Claiming that it isn’t a good idea to be toting around an ancient Relic on her hip like a key chain. Good point. Oscar decides to let Ruby know that he’s uncomfortable with the idea of lying to Ironwood, saying it’s just like what Ozpin did to them. While the lies will probably blow up in their face, I still feel that Ruby’s hesitation is validated. She doesn’t know Ironwood, or what he will do with the information, or if he will try to claim Jinn’s last question. Only time will tell if Ruby will come forward herself, or if someone else will do it for her.
Team Chemistry
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It’s not totally relevant to the plot currently, but there was a lot of onscreen chemistry between some of our team members. I’m sure aaaaaallll the shippers are losing their minds with the Bumbleby scene. Yang gets all flustered over Blake’s new look, and Blake gets all blushy. While I personally ship Blake/Sun, it’s just nice to see some LGBTQ representation. It means a lot.
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Of course, Nora is still pining after Ren, who is either completely oblivious, or just isn’t ready to see his surrogate sister as a potential romantic partner, even if he does reciprocate her feelings. Ren isn’t exactly known for being upfront with his feelings. After losing Arkos, I really hope they get together, and not five minutes before one of them dies.
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I’m not crazy, right? There was definitely a vibe here. Maybe Clover is just generally a flirty person, but he was sending those flirty vibes towards Qrow.
You Have To Go Inside
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The inside of the mine is full of Grimm, but the main target is a Geist. It has already claimed the lives of several Atlesian soldiers.
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They follow it down to the deep depths of the mines, where the Geist merges with the surrounding terrain, which includes big chunks of Gravity Dust. Which means that they have to be weary of attacking it, or they could set off the dust in the Geist, which would have a chain reaction and set off the rest of the dust in the mine, effectively killing them.
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So Team RWBY, JNR, and Qrow take a back seat and let the ACE ops take over.
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It was a great action scene, the ACE ops got to flex their abilities, and the Geist was effectively dealt with. But there was a very interesting scene between Harriet Bree and Ruby Rose. Ruby notes that Harriet’s semblance is speed, just like hers. But when Harriet tries to run and catch a falling shard of dust…
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Ruby beats her by an inch. Harriet makes it a point to tell her that Ruby’s semblance is not speed related, but something different. I always assumed that Ruby had two semblances, the first being her Silver Eyes, and the second is her speed, which mirrors her fast paced personality. Perhaps her speed is merely an extension of another power. Only time will tell.
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The Scorpion and The Frog
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It was revealed in Chapter 2 that Watts and Tyrian have rolled into town. Watts reveals that while the codes have been updated in Atlas, none of it has been updated in Mantle. He easily takes control of all of Mantle security cameras and traffic lights, which is probably only a fraction of the destruction he can cause. And of course, Tyrian is already causing his form of mayhem by killing people. Even in a place like Mantle, he’s gonna raise some red flags. But subtlety was never Tyrian’s strong suit.
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Now, Tyrian has tracked down our friend Forrest, a man who was in the police vehicle when the ACE ops apprehended our team last chapter. Forrest, as we know of now, is just a regular guy caught in the wrong place at the wrong time. But I don’t think Tyrian is going to care very much. Killing him after finding what limited information he has is just gravy.
Yaaaaaaas, Queen
Now, onto our team’s upgrades.
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Aside from Ruby’s more aerodynamic look, Crescent Rose also got an upgrade. It probably has been a long time since this fine weapon has had some fine tuning, what with Ruby always being on the road. And since Ruby makes all her upgrades herself, and it’s only been one episode, the only visual change to Crescent Rose is it is now able to rotate its scythe. Thus giving Ruby one less step to do when slaying Grimm. And the fact that the haircut is slightly reminiscent of bird feathers, much like her uncle’s hair, is so cute.
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Weiss is looking like a fucking Winter Queen with her new look. If she doesn’t at some point use that ponytail braid as a weapon to slay Grimm, it would be such a waste. I don’t even care that she has so many unnecessary belts, she looks fire. Aside from her new outfit, Myrtenaster does not seem to have any visual upgrades. Since most of her fighting technique comes from her semblance, I’m looking forward to see if she develops any new skills. Especially now that Winter, her mentor, and Weiss are back together again.
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Now that Blake has liberated the White Fang from Adam’s tyranny, as well as conquered some personal demons, Blake has undergone a big change. She chopped off her beautiful long hair, and now has a cute bob. It’s most likely symbolic of her being ready to stop hiding who she is and being more open with people. She also has a newly fixed Gambol Shroud, which has a very noticeable gold streak where the blade was once broken. I’m sure that the scientists could have rebuilt Gambol Shroud with no evidence that it was ever broken in the first place. Meaning that this was a cosmetic change that Blake specifically requested. Again, Bumbleby shippers have been waiting years for actual evidence of Blake and Yang’s feelings for one another. Good for them.
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Of course, Yang is living her truth. She is wearing a jumpsuit with detachable pant legs and an aviator jacket. Now I feel the overwhelming urge to buy pants with detachable pant legs. Her prosthetic arm has gotten an upgrade too, now fitted with a matching Ember Celica, balancing out her whole look. But that wasn’t the only thing she got done.
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Ember Celica is now capable of releasing small bombs, which Yang can activate from a safe distance. Of course, that means that Yang is toting around bombs on her wrists. Hopefully that doesn’t become a problem.
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I went into what Jaune’s upgrades would be last time, but now we’ve seen him in action. His shield, Crocea Mors, now acts as a make shift para-glider, can expand to an even larger shield, and can release shock waves that can knock back large Grimm. Crocea Mors also magnetically attaches to his forearm, much like Pyrrha’s shield did. Ren’s dual pistols, Storm Flower, now has the ability to shoot the blades that are now attached cables, giving Ren the power to move more aerodynamically. There are no visual changes to Nora’s weapon, Magnhild, please leave a comment if I missed something there.
Aces Wild
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Clover Ebi, he wields a sort of fishing rod that doubles as a hook sword. His semblance is Good Fortune, the exact opposite of Qrow’s semblance. Good things happen around him. Which did make me suspicious as to how his missed the Geist when he seems to have no problem aiming that fancy fish hook. Maybe it was simply a way to bring up his semblance, or he missed on purpose. Why? Maybe to allow his team an opportunity to flex their abilities and instill the fact that they’re supposed to be the good guys and can be trusted.
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Harriet Bree, rocking the classic All Might bunny ear hair style, wears robotic gauntlets to fight hand to hand. But her main feature is her speed semblance. She runs so fast, she is literally charged full of electricity. She ran fast enough catch a falling piece of dust all the way on the other side of the cave, and delivered the final blow to the Geist. She is most likely based off of the Hare from the Tortoise and the Hare.
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Vine Zeki, a more mysterious member of the ACE ops. He seems to be the no nonsense type, and doesn’t lay his cards on the table. He currently wields no weapons, relying on his semblance. He is able to project his aura and create elongated arms and hands. Very useful for getting around or holding onto struggling prey.
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Elm Ederne, a very overzealous woman, who seems to have good intentions. She immediately befriends Ruby once the dust settles on their fight last chapter, and compliments Team JNR a few times too. She wields a giant hammer, and her semblance appears to be being able to literally plant herself like a tree. Her aura wraps around her feet and attaches to the ground beneath her, making her a somewhat immovable object. For a powerhouse like Elm, I’m sure her semblance makes her a tough opponent to fight.
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Marrow Amin, a dog type Faunus who likes to put up a tough front but seems to actually be more puppy than wolf. Being the only Faunus on this elite team, I’m sure that he’s barely tolerated by the Atlas aristocrats. He is astutely aware of how his species are treated as subhuman, and are dispensable to the people in Atlas. But that doesn’t seem to affect his ability to do his duty. Marrow’s weapon is some sort of chainsaw boomerang-rifle. It does not obey the laws of physics. Nor does Marrow obey the laws of time. His semblance seems to be a form of time dilation. With a snap of his fingers, he froze two Grimm centipeetls in midair, but it only affected the Grimm. That must mean that his semblance has a certain range of effectiveness. But it’s still a really powerful semblance.
Agents Of Chaos
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As the viewer, who knows just how dire the situation is, everything else seems small. When you see Whitely Schnee screwing over Weiss to get her spot as heir of the Schnee Dust Company, Jacques Schnee’s charade to be the top of the societal pyramid, and just the entirety of Atlas just seems so petty in the grand scheme of things. We are literally the brink of the end of the world. Do they really think Salem will care who has the most money, comes from the oldest family, or has the most dust if she gets all the Relics? We’re finally making some headway. They have two Relics (one in a vault), one Maiden (but still know who the Summer Maiden is), and a girl with the ability to turn Grimm into stone. Leaving us with Watts and Tyrian to worry about. The two of them will be stirring the pot in Mantle, while Atlas will probably be a big enough headache on their own.
If you made it to the end of this post, you are one very determined individual. Please leave a comment if I missed anything, got anything wrong, or if you have your own theories. I’d love to hear them.
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impulse-writing · 5 years
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prompt: a dragon nesting
“Yang, love of my life, woman of my dreams.” Blake watched a roof shingle fall and shatter on the patio, cracked pieces of slate scattering on polished wood. “What the hell are you doing?”
“I’m fixing the roof, babe.”
“... Why?”
She winced at the sound of wood splintering in a thousand pieces, which was loud enough that her faunus ears pressed against her head, trying to block out the ruckus. There was another bang. Something heavy fell (“…shit.”). And it sounded like Yang ripped something from the foundations of their house, while the roof shuddered from something heavy being dragged across.
Despite dreading her wife’s antics, Blake was too tired and cranky to climb up the roof and investigate it herself.
“I noticed one of the shingles were cracked.”
“Why does it sound like you’re replacing our entire roof?”
Sweet silence graced her ears. Blake crossed her arms over the swell of her stomach, knowing perfectly well her imposing figure was less effective thanks to the glow and healthy roundness of her face. Nonetheless, she felt pleased to see Yang’s golden head come into view not a second too soon.
She winced at the sight of Blake’s glare, visible even from two stories below. Her yellow eyes narrowed into slits, ears pushed back, and hackles raised. “Yang Xiao Long.” Her words dripped with false composure. “Get down here right now.”
Yang’s head disappeared from view in a flurry of hair. A minute later, she appeared again, standing at the edge of the roof carrying a toolbox, a shovel, and what seemed to be a shoddily constructed birdhouse tucked under one arm. Blake had no idea where the birdhouse came from. The birdhouse did not exist yesterday, and it eerily looked like something made from their broken backdoor -- which Yang promised she would fix a week ago. And just like their old door, the wood was tainted green. And the doorknob was still attached.
Blake did not want to know why her wife took it to the roof with her. So she bit her tongue and waited, patient as Yang jumped down and landed in front of her, bouncing on the balls of her feet.
“What’s up?”
“Yang--”
“Hold that thought.” She rushed over to the wheelbarrow by their shed, throwing the shovel and toolbox next to it. She tucked the ‘birdhouse’ under one arm after a moment of struggling, and began to dig through the mess of rusty garden tools half-buried under fertilizer, dead leaves, and recently cut grass. “Babe, have you seen the garden hose somewhere?”
Blake pressed her thumb and forefinger against her throbbing brow.
“No, Yang. Why do you need a garden hose?”
“Makin’ a frog pond.”
Blake heaved the world’s longest sigh. Deep breaths, Blake.
“Honey, maybe you should take a break from all your projects? We can get someone else to fix the roof.” Or what’s left of it. “And we can hire a professional... frog pond person.”
“Nope, no can do.” Yang said, effectively dashing Blake’s hopes for a wonderful morning of peace and cuddling with her fertilizer-smelling, grass-stained wife. “Remember those stories I told you about when Ruby and I were kids? We used to play around the lake near our house, and we had fun catching tadpoles, setting cattails on fire, and -- okay maybe I caught hypothermia that one time, but it was mostly sweet kid stuff!” Yang finally kept herself from vibrating in place to turn around and give Blake a better view of the smile on her infuriatingly pretty and adorable face. “This will be awesome. Trust me.”
“That’s great.” Blake said, thinking about how not-great this was. “But maybe you can work on the frog pond next time and come back inside? You’ve been doing these things non-stop for weeks now, Yang. I miss you. I’m sexually frustrated, and I have no idea what’s happening to our house anymore.”
“I gotta get everything ready before the babies get here.” Yang said, waving a giant pair of garden shears in the air. “It’s my job to make sure everything’s perfect when they arrive. Besides, the pond’s gonna tie the swing and treehouse together. Just wait and see, Blake, it’s gonna be gorgeous.”
Treehouse?
Before Blake could ask her to repeat and kindly specify what the hell she was talking about, Yang ran off again, grabbing the shovel by her feet. She made a beeline for the beautiful great oak in their garden, and Blake didn’t have the strength or will to stop her. Instead, she watched as Yang jumped onto one of the branches, and proceeded to shimmy up the tree; disappearing behind the thick foliage with the shovel sticking awkwardly amongst the swaying branches and leaves.
This was how Weiss received a frantic call from Blake that morning.
“Weiss, I need you here right now.”
She could hear horrible noises from the other side of her scroll. Blake’s voice loud enough for Weiss to hear, and it was apparent how rough and tired she sounded; an edge of desperation begging to be released behind the calm veneer she barely managed.
“Blake?”
“I think my wife is possessed and I don’t know what to do.”
“Whoa, wait. Slow down... Ren, are you still there? Yes. Can I call you back? … Yes ...Of course, yes. I will speak to you later. Good-bye.”
“Weiss?”
“Belladonna, this better be good. Ren was telling me about the dreaded syllabus for the next semester.”
“I need you and your sanity to come here right now. Where are you?”
“I’m visiting professor Port --”
“That’s just an hour long drive from here, right?”
“Yes, Blake. Just an hour-long drive.”
“Please come over?”
Weiss cursed her inability to express sarcasm without sounding too much like Weiss Schnee.
“... Fine.”
“Thanks, Weiss. Oh, and can you bring me a bag of shrimp crackers? Thanks.”
Weiss left Professor Port’s house in a rush, trying to estimate what time she might arrive on the couple’s doorstep. She wondered if she could cut an hour to a half by speeding over a hundred, but decided against it. Instead, Weiss spent her hour long drive to Blake and Yang’s house thinking.
Thinking, Weiss thought, was good  ‘Thinking’ was also something Weiss was particularly good at doing. Having an unpredictable force of nature as a partner for more than a decade, in both profession and matrimonially, demanded her mind to work like a detached, mechanical processor most of the time. Like a dot matrix printer arranging a billion dots until they created a picture anyone could comprehend. Some people called it a gift, but Weiss proceeded to call it ‘necessary for her mental health’.
“She’s the team’s Weiss of reason.” Yang once said, three seconds before everyone pelted her with peanuts and tiny cocktail umbrellas.
Chamomile for Blake, and black coffee for Weiss. One of their many comforts were small reminders of things that never changed.
Blake had her face in her hands, fingers pressed against her temples as if she could ward off the source of her predicament by the willpower of touch alone. The pair were alone in the humbly decorated kitchen, a few plates piled up in the sink, the smell of breakfast escaping from the open windows. Toast, eggs, dried fish, sweet tomatoes. There were sunflower-themed drapes, the drawers, tables and chairs were painted yellow, and the fridge had pictures of the couple in happier times. The colorful fridge magnets below spelt: ‘help me’.
Weiss concentrated on the hot water kettle.
“This is beyond asking for fritos in the middle of the night, Weiss. Or carrying around dirty laundry in my pockets.” Blake said, her voice muffled. “I swear, it’s not my hormones or mood swings acting up. Yang is driving me crazy, and you’ll know why when you see what she’s been doing to the place.”
“Well the house looks like it’s still standing.”
Weiss watched Blake ruefully reach for a shrimp cracker.
“Although I do admit, you look like someone just died.” Weiss said, leaning her hip against the table top counter.
“Thanks.”
“So let’s take a breather and think about this.” Weiss crossed her arms. “What else has she been doing? ”
“Other than dumb DIY projects?” Blake exhaled. “I found her ‘baby-proofing’ the living room with pool noodles a week ago.”
“Ah. I was wondering why Yang had boxes of those in your garage.”
“She almost booked an expensive birthing room from a hippy compound in Vacuo--”
“There’s a hippy compound in Vacuo?”
“... which cost a thousand lien.”
“Why is it a thousand lien?” Weiss scoffed, rubbing her forehead. “That’s a ridiculous price. I mean what do they do, birth your child in a diamond encrusted pool?”
“Weiss, do I look like I bothered to find out?”
“Point.”
Blake relaxed into the chair, as much as she could, her hand resting on the curve of her belly. “We have coupons for cup ramen and free dumplings everywhere, several different colors of paint because Yang can’t decide ‘which shade is the best for the baby room’.” Weiss tried not to laugh when Blake managed an exaggerated imitation of an annoyed Yang.
“That doesn’t sound too bad, all things considered.”
“Yang has dismantled and put together our doors, windows, and chairs multiple times because it didn’t look safe enough or it looked ‘wonky’. Our unborn children own several pairs of shoes and sunglasses than both of us combined, and she bought a jackhammer and a woodworking chisel set the other day.” Blake caught her eyes, her face drawn with palpable fear. “I have no idea where Yang put them, or why she bought them in the first place.”
“I see.”
“I have a strong feeling, Weiss. A strong, very bad feeling.”
“I’ll make sure Ruby finds them so you can return them to the store.”
“And she fixed ‘the pipes’.” Blake threw her hands into the air. “I have no idea which ‘pipes’ she was talking about, but I found her tinkering around underneath the space of our house with a rope and a screwdriver. I dunno Weiss, I just don’t know.” She inhaled a shaky breath, raking her fingers through frazzled hair. “It’s actually happening. I am losing my mind. I never thought this day would come.”
“Okay, first of all: sweetheart, this is Yang we’re talking about, right?” Weiss clicked her tongue. She turned her attention to opening one of the kitchen cupboards, and reached in for a clean teacup. “You know her, she’ll tire herself out soon enough after doing a half-ass job of everything. I’ll help hire a carpenter to fix whatever she breaks, and I can even throw in a treehouse if you want. Easy solution, and nothing to be overdramatic about.”
“Am I, Weiss?” Blake’s ear twitched. “Am I overreacting?”
Weiss was glad Blake couldn’t see the smirk on her face. She liked to tease, but she knew Blake would snap with her pregnant lady fury if she pushed too far. If she sensed even a shred of mirth from her, Blake might do something drastic, like force Yang to live in her house during the remaining four months of her pregnancy. Weiss loved her sisters-in-law, but she also loved her modest house too much to invite a literal walking cyclone of repressed mommy issues near her furniture. She already had a walking disaster with a penchant for sharp things living with her in it, and that number was her limit.
“Weiss, you are totally not helping.” Blake said.
“I’m sorry! But maybe it’s better to stop worrying, maybe sleep-in, visit that new bookstore in Vale before your paperwork drags you back behind your desk. Let Yang do her Yang things, and assume everything will be back to normal by the time my nieces are–”
It took Weiss a full minute before she realized she was holding a rock.
She raised the rock up at eye level, confirming to herself that yes – it was a rock. A real-life rock. She sent Blake a look.
“Yang started hoarding them a few days ago.”
“Hoarding rocks?”
Blake bounced her shoulders with a tired shrug.
Weiss carefully placed the rock on the counter, looking as if it would transfigure into a teacup the instant she takes her eyes off it. She pulled the cupboard doors wide open, and gasped at what seemed to be a rock collection hidden amongst the fancy tea cups and glass mugs. All of them piled on top of each other, all in different shapes and various sizes, with the largest as big as her head.
“What is this?”
“Is that a rhetorical question, or are you still having trouble taking me seriously?”
Weiss poked her nose inside the cupboard to take a closer look. There were rocks inside the teacups. There were rocks inside the mugs.
She looked at Blake and pointed at the extensive rock collection, an eyebrow raised, and Weiss could almost hear her say ‘told ya so’ with her derisive look.
As if needing further confirmation of Yang’s recent habits, she continued to open one of the utensil drawers and gasped in scandalous horror when she discovered bottle caps, smaller pebbles, and tiny cereal box toys filling the tiny space from corner to corner. Other than the geological refuse mingling with the sporks were fancy hair clips buried underneath with the butter knives.
In the cupboard under the sink were coins in tupperwares, a random assortment of fancy beads, and buttons filling a lone boot in the dark corner.
For the life of her, Weiss couldn’t keep the mirth from her voice.
“I can’t believe Yang Xiao Long is nesting.”
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