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hel-phoenyx · 7 days

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Desire, Nru, Universe and Kal @corneille-but-not-the-author 's characters

She's a weird little lady, that one. All in pink and skin subtly revealed, her tiny stature barely reaching my neck, she's looking at me with the interested eyes of a predator that just found his prey.

I don't like those eyes, but they're giving me a damn good hint on her nature. Usually people take me for the predator. Especially right now, with both magic and anger seeping through every hole in my body.

People that can die never consider me their prey, nor their inferior.

It's a goddess. I can hardly guess her nature nor her motive, but I suppose it will be revealed soon enough.

I squint my eyes, look towards her, take advantage of our height difference to try and assert dominance.

She doesn't even flinch.

"Alright. What the fuck am I doing here? And adding to that, WHERE is "here"."

A smile rips through her lips.

"Do you mind not screaming? I have sensitive ears."

Well talk about a first impression. I roll my eyes, crossing my arms on my chest. I'm not even screaming, godsdamnit, I just have a very strong voice. The kind that beams through battlefields.

"Just fucking answer that question."

She laughs, hand in front of her face, her smile still not disappearing.

"What a filthy mouth you have there, Mairù Claro. Did you ever teach yourself politeness?"

"Abyss nope, and certainly not toward goddesses. Can I have a fucking answer now?"

Her eyes gleam with victory.

"They weren't lying, you are a smart one."

Her arms held behind her, she salutes me with a reverence people reserve for their equals.

"I am Desire of Lazzaro, current Queen of Lazzarian principality. And coincidentally, that's where you are. Happy coincidences, ain't it?"

"Principalities are ruled by queens now?"

"Let's just say I had to.... Reinstate old titles."

Not reassuring. And the fact I don't even know that country is not helping. Is it a part of the Paper continent? I thought we were good with Faloi. And worst of all, her tone when she's telling me that is somehow heavier than it needs to be. What old titles? Fuck is happening here?

Like I'd know. I only just got back from a several year long exile, just in time to witness the most disgustingly bucolic scene my eyes have ever seen. Anger fills my heart at the thought, and I restrain a hiss with all my willpower; sadly, it didn't get past her.

"As for what you're doing here... I think you have some sort of idea. Kal'Dithryon was about to kill you. I couldn't let that happen."

Right. I remember now. I was right in the middle of something important and my asshole of a former boss kinda threw some creationnist spells at me. Apparently he's now keen on starting duels on royal grounds, that's damn interesting. Oh how I wanted so badly to thrust a tentacle or two into his sorry ass. Or bones. Whatever.

But killing the queen's new counselor would have earned me the death penalty for sure, and that is in admittance I'd have won. Kal is far from a newbie in magic, and we play on the same field. A duel would make my victory more uncertain than you'd think.

That still doesn't answer my question.

"And you wanted me alive for what?"

Because I'm not stupid, people and especially gods don't save lives with no hidden intentions. There has to be something.

Desire is still smiling, albeit a bit more... Hungrily.

"You are indeed a smart one. I didn't save you from the goodness of my heart, despite how cute you are..."

I grumble at the use of the word I stopped believing a long time ago but she carries on, unfazed.

"... I just need you for several things. First one is easy, just be a mole for me. Spy on your queen, bring me intel, I don't ask for much, I know you're not the Mandate's favorite person..."

She winks, and I shiver. I'm not used to feel terror, but that little woman is making me feel really uneasy.

"The second thing is more important. When the moment comes, and you will recognize it, I'll need you by my side. Sadly I can't say much, a law of the cosmic kind is stopping me, but I will tell you as much as I can, in due time."

Not sure I'll believe it, but eh, loyalty to a kingdom's never been my forte. And I have a... Certain resentment towards the Mandate. So betrayal is not something unforgivable, if only...

"Sounds like you wanna make me your little pocket dog until then, sweetie. And I'm not keen on being kept on a leash."

"Pleaaaase.... I only give leashes to consenting partners, and I wouldn't dare force one on you."

I smile. Magic crepitates between my teeth, ready to strike.

"Cool. Wouldn't want you to discover what it exactly feels like to have a goddess put down."

"Sweettalker. Don't worry, I will not only give you your life in exchange. What about a little deal?"

Deal? She speaks more of my language. I did not usually receive deals in my life. Either I take what I want, or people take what they want from me. Come to think of it, the last person I made a deal with is Kal.

The expression on her face tells me there are things I'd better leave uncovered, but for now, I decide to dare the devil and keep looking that girl in the eyes.

She's still smiling.

"A deal, huh. Like what?"

"Well I am goddess of Desire. As such, of course I know what is the Desire of your heart..."

"Is that supposed to be a pun? Spare me that, please," I grunt, "and get to the point."

"You're a fun breaker. What if I serve you your beloved on a plate, with the deaths of Kal'Dithryon, and Kage and Nru Frosilæn as a bonus? Would that be of interest?"

Well that's getting to the point. I let myself smile, pushing away the very tempting idea; Deals with that kind of entity are often more binding that they appear to be and I don't want to give myself a reason to fight a goddess yet.

"And how would you do that in a way I can't?"

Again she winks. Abyss, she's creeping me out. My body's not supposed to react like that to anyone. I am not supposed to feel fear. Where did all those years of conditioning go?

"Stealthily for starters. No offense to you but you're not exactly sleek in what you want. And how do you think Asura would react if you killed her wife in such an obvious way?"

Good point.

I always was a fast thinker, but now I don't even take the time to reflect before extending my hand.

"Deal. But you let me take care of Kal. Old resentments."

And I'd rather be the one who ends his life. Letting him die without having my part in it would be... Dissatisfying.

She takes my hand and smiles even wider.

"Deal. I'm sure we'll get along smoothly."

I never less believed a lie.

****

She's squirming on the floor of my laboratory, hands and feet tied, a look of pure hatred and terror on her face. But I ignore her easily enough. I have waited enough to see Nru Frosilaen at my mercy for being afraid now.

Why would I be anyway ? All daughter of Death she is, I am a better fighter than her and she knows it. I won't hesitate to kill her and the split second she would take to try and kill me would be far, far more than enough.

Desire is smiling, towering over Nru with a foot on her back. She doesn't even pay attention to the first daughter of the Frosilaen trying so desperately to escape.

"And there she is, the girl in the flesh ! Or bones, I don't know. Daughters of death have a tendency to become lichs. Have I ever told you about the Collector-"

"I don't want to hear a history lesson, sweetheart, I have things to do."

Desire winks at me.

"And an owl to pluck, of course of course! I wouldn't want to slow you down... But no offense to you, it's hard to believe you're motivated if you keep calling me petnames, Mairù, my dear. I'm gonna start to believe I did everything for naught..."

Really ? Goddesses and their tendency to joke around, really I'd never understand that species.

"Don't take this personally, everyone get petnames. They just get meaner if you're being a bitch and I'm seriously considering it."

"Aw, and here I thought we had something special. But what are you gonna do with the owl ?"

I lower my eyes towards said owl, even if she's currently in her human form, disgustingly human features and damning jet black hair that looks so much like Lina's. But while I adored her hair, that feature on Nru only inspires me with sheer hatred.

How dare you look so much like her and take everything when your sister gave me all ?

I'll make you pay. For taking my place, tossing me aside a time too much, and continuing to look at me with those eyes full of fear even after all those months.

I'm sick of people looking at me like a monster. So if they're not gonna change their minds about me, at least I'll give them the show they'll expect.

"None of your business."

"Thought as much. Too bad, I wanted to see that hatred of her face become fear. That would have been simply delicious."

"Whoa there! I'm a monster, not a torturer. I'll be quick, that's all you need to know."

Nru is still squirming, putting in question my resolution to act quickly. If not painlessly. Well, I didn't intend to give her a painless death anyway. I'm not good at that and certainly don't wanna learn.

"What do you have against Nru anyway ?"

Desire shrugs.

"Nothing in particular, but Death and I have history of some sorts. And, well, I do enjoy thorns in my side being pulled off. A daughter of death is a real danger for my current plans."

"Fair enough. Can you go now so I can get down to business ?"

She smiles again, and for a split second I feel my nerves straighten.

"Of course. Good evisceration, dear."

****

I don't remember anything before the point I woke up in the remains of my former confrery building, destroyed Gods know how. But one thing for sure, my body remember that woman.

Not in a weird way. more like in a "I'm not supposed to feel frightened" way. The way people that can kill me are making me feel like.

Fear is not in the natural order of things. I was always more powerful than other people around me. Only exception being Kal. And now, that woman.

And since people can't all be creationnist magicians reputed to be messiahs of a god nobody believes in anymore, I take it this one is a goddess.

She is waiting from me in what looks like a used torture room. Standing on a chair covered in blood, holding a wedding ring in her finger.

"Rings are powerful tools of love, are they not ? This one was made in honor of the love between queen Frosilaen's predecessors. A beauty of a couple, and people killed too soon. But you don't remember that, don't you ?"

I roll my eyes.

"I certainly remember not liking people that talk in riddles."

A laugh escapes from her throat, and she jumps from the chair with a huge, happy smile, taking my hand to guide me towards the inside of the torture room. I don't like that, blood is making me uneasy, tugging at the strings of my broken brain like something I should, or shouldn't, remember.

"Still the same as ever, Mairù ! I'm glad memory loss didn't take that from you."

"You know about my memory loss ?"

She climbs the chair, up now at my eye level.

"Of course I know. How could you forget about me, you... Oh wait, of course you did, since someone took your memories! Silly me!"

Again I hear her laugh, but far, far away in my head where other words she made sound so trivial resonate so harshly.

Took my memories.

So my memory loss WAS artificial.

I don't know many mages able to erase a memory entirely. It could be Kage, with a powerful space-time spell, I know those people mastered that fucking craft. Or Kal. Kal, who described himself as my friend, an old friend, of course he would hide from me that someone took my memory.

And why the actual fuck did people tamper with my brain, godsdamnit ? Can't a guy have autonomy around here ? It's disturbing enough to see people looking at you weird without knowing why !

Something is boiling in me.

I think it's anger.

I hope it's anger.

"... Memories taken away, huh."

"Yeaaaaah. And you didn't even reach the goal I promised you, I feel so guilty for that failure ! And here I thought everything was perfect..."

Her words once again call for an echo in my mind. A goal. I had a goal. Something I desired more than anything in the world...

I remember now.

She's Desire. Goddess of Desire.

And this is definitely not our first meeting.

Probably seeing the light of comprehension in my face, Desire smiles almost wickedly. For a split second, I feel a shiver run down what's left of my spine. That girl could gobble me up so easily. Just a split second...

I shake my head. No time for fear, I may be in front of one of the biggest opportunities in my dump of a life.

"And I guess you can do something about that, sweetheart ?"

She laughs again.

"Oh dear, I haven't heard petnames in so long! And I can do anything people Desire enough..."

"I almost wanted to forget your tendency to do puns around your name."

"You wound me. Do you want your memories back or not ?"

I don't hesitate. Never intended to.

"Yes."

Her eyes burn with a newfound victory.

"Come a bit closer."

Her tone is far more commending than it was before. I'm not one to follow orders, but to my biggest shame I am not in any way able to disobey, and I walk the two, three steps that separate me from the chair she's standing on. From where I am, she's now higher than eye level, and that's highly disturbing : But I don't move, and wait for the next seconds to pass.

She takes my head between her hands. Her eyes didn't leave my face.

"Look at me."

My eyes are riveted on her. I couldn't look away even if I wanted to. Even if all my nerves are screaming to run away, run away before she bites my head off, before that face that is very much too close reaches her goal-

Her voice holds me in place, almost too sultry.

"You don't mind me, do you ? I'll need a bit of... Closure to achieve my goal."

I feel something on my mouth, hot and soft, right after I had the time to nod, and my mind blanks on the only thought that can reach through my brain at the moment.

Did she just give me tongue that little-

I can't finish that sentence. Because at the exact moment her tongue brushes mine something explodes in my brain and it's now only flashes and flashes of pain and screaming.

I see that face I now remember I loathed bringing me to the training grounds. I can feel the spells, my body changing, morphing, despite all my attempts to block it, I feel the magic pulsing in my veins, destroying what's left of the fight. I feel all that magic getting out, hitting the innocent face of a five-year-old I never wanted to hurt. I feel the looks on my face, so full of fear and disgust, so little people wanting to be near me. I feel her kisses and I hear her laugh, right before in my head resonates a "we can't continue like this."

And in the middle of that maelstrom of pain, I see her. Red-headed, beautifully authoritarian, holding my neck like I was naught but a naughty cat in need of a little scolding. I see her in my laboratory while we're sharing a laugh on a reagent that exploded while I didn't want it to, and my face is now covered in bubbles. I see her looking towards me while I explain exactly what pain I'm feeling, those looks I hoped to be understanding but discovered to be longing far too late, and when I realized it, how I wanted so badly to give her back those looks.

I remember the training, even harsher than the first one but this time of my own volition. I remember wanting so hard to become useful to her, to be a man nobody could fear anymore, that she would be proud to love. How I wanted so badly to come back to her and say sorry for everything I failed her for.

I remember coming home far too late.

I remember the black-haired bitch.

I remember the blood on my eyes.

I remember my most precious friend taking my face into his hands.

I remember everything.

The hands around my cheeks are not Kal's. They're Desire, who's stroking my head with an almost worried expression.

It hurts.

It hurts so much.

Please make the pain stop.

Please.

Anything.

Anyone...

"Shhhhht. It's okay. Take your time."

The first voice I hear isn't the one I desire the most. It's the one of the goddess that incarnates that desire. She's not here. Of course she's not here. She is in her arms, frolicking, doing gods know what, casting me aside like I was nothing but a fleeting comfort.

Again I am nothing but a fling.

There is only me and Desire in that room.

Whatever that means.

I rip myself off her hands, and lean on the nearest wall, trying to stabilize my breath. I didn't even notice I was breathing like a rabid dog. Godsdamnit, should it always hurt so bad to recover memories ?

Well, considering the nature of the memories, I guess that couldn't be avoided.

It takes a little while to finally regain control of my brain, but when it is finally clearer, Desire is still sitting on the chair, a huge ass smile on her lips. She looks almost too happy.

"Well ? What do we say to our favorite goddess ?"

I laugh almost sincerely.

"Thank you, Desire."

"Good boy. Now what do you intend to do ?"

Thinking doesn't take me long, as usual. I am currently under the biggest cover I can have, and not a lot of people can realize I recovered my memory. Either Kage, but Kage's never here, or Kal. But I know several ways to shut Kal up.

Best take advantage of it.

"Keep a low profile, of course! I am currently innocent like the newborn lamb for them, and I contribute to society! Why would I ruin that?"

"As always, you always choose the smartest move, my dear!"

It's not the most enjoyable one, but well, I know it will pay.

I don't mind playing the long game.

****

It's been a long time since my fucking trial, and Lina's coronation. Twenty years, if I recall. It's a lot, but for Travellers it goes like a second. Especially when you're at the head of a kingdom that needs rebuilding to the core.

Not like I care anyway. But contrary to Lina, who still looks as young as ever while having reached her forties, I feel my end approaching very, very quickly. I'm already at the high average of my species' life expectancy. I don't have much time to spare.

So I'm waiting for the right moment quite expectantly. Even more since Asura married. The pain I felt that day almost broke my vow of laying low, but I held my grounds. In a big part thanks to Desire and the tiny little button-like device now at the back of my head, that strangely helped regulate my emotions easier than I ever did myself.

She promised me only ten years of waiting. We're close to the deadline, and I still haven't heard a peep of that great project, besides the occasional mind conversation. We had a lot of things to do in ten years. For starters, I finally found something about Aelie's disease. I think I can create a vaccine, but I'm not quite sure. The virus is almost godlike, and gods don't like me meddling in their business.

Except Desire, apparently.

Since she's now sat on my fucking chair.

I should be happy to see her, really, I should. But the only thing I can think of is what the fuck girl I litteraly just woke up ???

"Wha- The hell are you doing in my room ???"

She lifts her head from the book she was reading, my research about the vaccine it seems.

"Oh hey Mairù ! Well, I'm trying to understand what you wrote there, but sadly I am no scientist."

"That- That wasn't my fucking question ?"

I say while realising in a split second that like the usual I'm fucking naked. Because of course I sleep naked, clothes are giving me a sensory nightmare. And I usually don't mind it except right now there's a fucking girl in my fucking room and she's the fucking goddess of fucking desire !

"fucking" being the appropriate word considering the look she just gave me. I'm under the feeling she just saw a very yummy plate of ribs that looks a little too eatable to my tastes. Intrigue the First, are goddesses always that horny ???

I blush, and pull back my covers on my chest. Not right now, not for you, and no don't smile more it's only creeping me out!

"Shy, are we ?"

"Can't a man have a right to damn privacy ? Let me put something on, at least, Intrigue the first be sent to Abyss!"

"Of course, of course, go ahead!"

And she

She doesn't move an inch.

Obviously.

I roll my eyes again, trying to not use a flashbang to get my damn privacy. Because that would be hostile, and plus, I'm not sure it works on gods.

"Desire, sweetheart, I meant LOOK SOMEWHERE ELSE !!!"

I can't miss her look of disappointment.

"Ohhh, right. Tell me when you're ready, would you ?"

Finally she turns around. I leap out of my bed, keeping my eyes on her, and hurriedly put on underwear and something to become at least a little more decent. Finally, when I've got my blouse on me, I signal Desire I'm now dressed, and she turns around a bit fast for my tastes.

"There you go! Now I can finally give you things to do!"

"Bossing me around, huh ? Never been a fan of that, hon."

"I would never. Except in bed."

My blasé look is, I think, enough of an answer. She laughs a little bit, before standing up.

"But more seriously the plan is almost in place. I just need some elements to make it more believable. Would you be willing to help me ?"

"Depends. On what?"

"Oh, nothing much. Now that I have my best mole implanted on the field, I need him in action. Soon enough a very special event will take place. I need someone that will blow the alarm whistle on it, and it needs to be from the Divine Mandate. Otherwise, they won't be able to participate."

I raise my eyebrow in surprise.

"And you can't tell them ?"

"Nope ! Cosmic law, remember ? It needs to be a Mandatian that discovers the info on their own terms for it to be broken."

Of course it always needs to be convoluted. But I know cosmic bindings quite well. I have studied the case of the Enlightened One in much of my free time because Asura loved that part of history. So I am familiar with promises that bind you by the very law of the universe.

"I see, I see. And you can't drop the documents I'm certainly gonna need on anyone, of course."

"Well, I could, but there is a slight chance it won't work. Nru tried to spill the beans earlier in history but almost died, you know ? She is from Ink, maybe it played a role."

"Not like it would have bothered me."

Desire has a small laugh.

"Of course. Point is, I'm putting every last chance on my side. Your species is Mandatian to the core, you know ? Your kind is only born in that territory, and we never could figure out why. If there is someone that can break that cosmic binding, it's you."

And then again with being a prophet... Well, can't say I'm not used to it. And at least it would be useful for my very own personal goal.

"All right. Where do I need to go to find the precious information I'm supposed to break a cosmic binding around ?"

Desire smiles brightly and jumps towards me.

"Perfect ! Nothing far, don't worry, only in Love's cathedral."

"In where now ?"

My face must be very funny because Desire bursts into laughing almost immediately.

"Don't look so surprised ! Adam kept quite a lot of documents during his reign, on all of the kingdoms including yours. Love's cathedral is the best place to start genuine research."

"Okay, fair enough, but Love's cathedral is where, sweetie ? In PAPER CONTINENT. You think I'm allowed to go there alone ???"

My concerns are brushed aside in a movement of the hand and a shrug.

"Just find someone to accompany you, pretend a breakthrough for the vaccine, there's many pretexts ! It will be even more impactful that way !"

If you say so. I suppose it will be better than to stay in that unbearable status quo. And I'll finally get to see that infamous Love cathedral where lied the first Frosilaen brother.

****

I’m back from Paper continent with a shitload of new intel and even more questions, starting with those three countries I finally remember, or discovered, the existence of. Now I know what Principality of Lazzaro is referencing, and it doesn’t exactly please me. A cosmic binding can’t be enough to hide both three countries and a giant fuckass tournament to decide which one is governing the other.

Worst, in my opinion, is that Lazzaro won the last one. But the Mandate is still autonomous and going strong. So what the fuck happened ?

I’m sat in my room after giving the news, and watching Lina’s face shrivel in terror. I think there are other implications to this tournament I don’t follow. She already asked me to participate. How funny it is that she needs me exactly when the country is in dire need of power.

And not at any other moment.

Oh, the irony. Did she ever see me as something else than a tool to satisfy her needs ?

Did everyone ever that was in love saw the other as something other than the satisfaction of their needs anyway ?

My visit to Love’s cathedral convinced me otherwise. Love there was only people kissing, noises of face meeting and absolutely no conversation. I’m starting to believe these people speak another language that needs their tongues joined together, and I am definitely not fluent. I would accuse Adam of twisting the meaning of Love, but even his death didn’t change anything.

Being the son of Love, Adam must have known what she wanted. What the word meant.

And if it’s only that… Have I ever been in love ?

A cough is heard right behind me. Desire, popping in my room for the second time in a week. This time, fortunately, I am not naked.

“Congrats for completing the task. And now that you know what I meant by “being by my side”...”

“You want me to participate in the tournament.”

I cut her in the middle of her sentence, but she doesn’t look too outraged. Only nods, eyes still riveted on me.

“Exactly. Sorry for having to be clear now about what our agreement was, but cosmic bindings make so. I mean, I would like to participate, but sovereigns are not allowed to, and that means giving up the crown, even only for a moment…”

“Eh, I’m better at fighting than ruling or naming over successors.”

“You were once Thaumargeikhon for the Heirs, tho.”

“Don’t remind me.”

Dark period of my life. Even though Kal had to twist a little the true meaning of that ancestral place at the Heir government, I never loathed more my place in politics. And I was only here to snarl at those corrupted fuckers wanting to be no better than the one genociding them. And I meant the term. Racism goes both ways even when there is one part of the people that is systematically discriminated against.

Desire doesn’t push the subject. She just shrugs.

“Fine, as you wish. I’m also gonna need to recruit Kage and Kal, since they’re not out of my hair.”

“Why them ? I am enough of a powerhouse already.”

She smiles, sitting on my bed. Great, now I can’t go lie down, it’ll just be weird.

“You are. But if they’re not with us, they’re against us. Lina will recruit them to her team, especially if you’re not there, and you and Kal are of equal strength. I can’t afford uncertainty. I need to win.”

“Why ?”

“For the exact reason it will be easy to convince Kage and Kal.”

She shuts up. Probably not wanting to say more. But there is something in her voice, something that tells me that the matter is all more personal than simply taking over a kingdom and reclaiming a victory the Mandate did not accept.

I would have pushed the subject, in another time. Or maybe just asked more questions. But my mind is occupied enough as it is.

Probably she noticed my silence, since she turned her head towards me.

“Something on your mind ?”

“A lot of things, really. I’m still thinking about Love’s cathedral. You’re really hated there, by the way.”

Desire sneers.

“Of course. They think love and desire don’t meddle easily, only create suffering. For them, love should only be submission. I find that completely stupid.”

“Heh. And here I thought you would tell me something about how love and sex are intertwined.”

I didn’t intend to do anything about that sour look on her face, only tease a little about all those times people told me to love someone, you must fuck them. Including some of the idiots in Love’s cathedral thinking sex is something you give, something you endure out of love. I always thought it was stupid, because then I’d never have been in love; but who would be listened to between the Love priest and the monster people love to hate ?

But to my surprise, she bursts out laughing, all traces of sourness gone from her face.

“Echiapolis, no! I’m not that stupid and especially not that inconstant. Sex is a matter of desire for pleasure, yours or the other’s, it has nothing to do with love. Can be linked, yes, but ain’t everything ?”

She lays down on my bed -great, there goes my nap- and sighs heavily.

“You know, sometimes I think I should have been one of the first goddesses. Because Desire, for everything, is what drives life forward. I have power some of those idiot Twelve can’t even imagine, including Love herself. But law says I am only a minor god with no counterpart, because Creator or whatever knows why. And Love is taken for everything I am while reducing what she is so, so much.”

“And what is love, then, if not what I saw at the cathedral ?”

Another sigh.

“You’re asking me a difficult question.”

“Who is the older-than-thou goddess that just told me Love isn’t what she appears to be ?”

She laughs, and pokes my non-existent ribs with a teasing smile.

“Smartass.”

“Should have thought of that before making a deal with me, sweetheart.”

Desire smirks and pinches the skin under what’s left of my torso.

“Oh, I’m more than happy to get the whole package, if you know what I mean.”

And if I had any doubts, the wink she just gave me is proof that yes, I know what she meant. Ew. Horny little shit. You’re not even sure I have something down there, for all you know magic could have destroyed that part of me. I did not check if it was still functional anyway, and I don’t see any future where it would be.

“You still didn’t answer my question.”

Apparently she didn’t expect me to come back to the subject, but she doesn’t have any ways to escape anymore. She sighs, and lay down again, looking at the ceiling with pensive eyes.

“Love is… Well, more than kissing, for starters. It’s the Desire to be close to someone, to hear their heart beat for you, to live for them. It’s shared interest or wanting to hear all about what they like, because it’s them and whatever they enjoy must be worth it. It’s wanting to stay with the person forever. It's so much more than just surrendering to someone.”

“You’re putting a lot of “want” in there.”

“Love is a bit selfish. It’s the selfishness to be selfless.”

“Wow. Deep,” I say with all the sarcasm I say. “You guys have something with a word and its opposite ?”

“Hey, you asked me to answer.”

“Fair.”

I think for a brief moment, before turning my head towards her.

“Have you ever been in love ?”

I probably shouldn’t have asked that question. Because her eyes are now lost behind a veil of mist, and the sadness in her expression is making me another kind of uneasy. I think it’s regret. Is it regret ?

Her face taints with every kind of sorrow.

“I have, yes.”

I stop pushing the subject.

***

My head hurts.

It hurts so much.

Why does it hurt that much ?

I should be happy.

Nru just died and it wasn’t my fault.

Yes, I did kill people during that tournament, but for her I stayed put. Like Desire told me to. and it paid. She's dead. Not by me.

I should be happy.

Why does it hurt ?

Was it Asura’s tears ? Everyone’s looks of sorrow ? Or my death approaching with the feeling I’ll never get those tears ?

I don’t know.

It hurts.

I have to fight Srodek tomorrow, and this time I don’t think I’ll be able to manage with the same bravado. Even though I swiped the Mandate’s team with ease, it took a big part of my energy and I had to get Kal to help me against Alba. Damn Byleth. Why did Desire expect me to fight an Aspect and win ? I barely obtained a victory and it was because he surrendered.

I feel so tired. My end is growing near. I could reach my forties but I know I won’t live past fifty. Every happiness I’ll obtain starting from now won’t last.

It hurts.

Desire is standing in front of a painting. Old, judging by the state of the paint. A woman is represented lying down on pillows, wearing a chiton whiter than snow. she would look perfectly normal if not for her skin, swirling and tracing a pattern of galaxy.

I don’t know who that woman is, but Desire looks at her with enough resentment for me to hate her.

I don’t know why.

“Mairù ?”

I sigh. Of course she would spot me. The amplification device tells her wherever I am, in whatever state. I didn’t expect her to worry about me.

“Yeah, I’m here.”

“Come closer.”

I obey, too tired to protest.

It hurts.

“How are you feeling ?”

I sigh.

“Bad.”

“Nru’s dead, tho. Shouldn’t that make you happy ?”

“I’m too close to death to be happy about anything right now.”

Something shifts in her expression, subtle, almost soft, before she finally stops looking at the painting to turn towards me.

“You won’t live that long, will you ?”

“Probably not. I’m already on borrowed time, and going full power for so long isn’t helping.”

“So any of the happiness I promised you wouldn’t last long anyway.”

“Afraid so. Hey, not your fault, alright ?” I smile, seeing some kind of shift in her face. “You upheld your part. The fact that I’m not eternal is my problem.”

It still hurts.

Desire bites her lower lip. Her eyes shift, from the painting to me to the painting again. One moment, I think she wants to say something, the other she just closes her eyes and steps a bit closer.

Her hands run over what’s left of the skin on my left arm.

“Nothing of this is fair.”

“Life ? Fair ? If it was, I wouldn’t be here with you, and I wouldn’t have any reason to accept your deal. Should be happy life fucked me over, sweetheart.”

Even the petname doesn’t make her laugh.

“I should not have to.”

It hurts a little less.

***

My brain is empty.

I do not know why I didn’t die.

I should have died.

I am close to death. And now the only thing keeping me alive threw my last chance of a fleeting happiness in the face.

Is it my fault ?

It’s probably my fault.

I don’t know what I’ve done. Only that it’s bad.

Only that Chiara is the only one who stopped in front of me.

“Desire seeks you,” she said. “You can still do something,” she said. But what ?

What good am I ?

Going on the battlefield at this time would kill me. My magic is too unstable, blood and death would be my end. At least I should time up that death to wipe out a maximum of enemies. But are they even my enemies ?

Some of them are the people Kal and I commanded. Heirs brainwashed by what took Love’s place to fight, to believe there is a future to that victory. But there won’t be a victory for anyone. Only for that eldritch beast that eats gods.

Is the something I can still do my death ?

Will I die as a tool after living as a monster ?

I can’t think.

I only walk, deep in the underground where Desire seeks me.

She’s there, protected by the H.A.R.D.I.. In front of her burns a purple flame, almost extinct, she’s looking at it with tired eyes.

She doesn’t even look my way.

“You’re here.”

The H.A.R.D.I. are looking at me with hateful eyes. Don’t know why. Too tired to care. I only know that now that I’m next to Desire, the pain is subsiding at least for a little while.

“Hey.”

“Guys, she ordered without even giving me an answer. Do me a favor and get out. I need pristine concentration.”

H.A.R.D.I. grunt like a sole man, but obey without any question. Ivan pushes me aside like I’m nothing but an obstacle in his way, without even sparing a look in my direction. I only roll my eyes. Whatever goes through those meatheads, I want nothing in it.

I sit down on the floor, waiting. What good can I still do, here, with a goddess and a weird flame ?

“Do you know what that is ?”

She asked, like she has nothing better to do. I squint my eyes.

“The Soul of all Souls, I recall. Artefact hidden in the chambers that helps give the royals their powers. What is responsible for Lina’s ability to cast powerful creationnist spells, and what’s left of the creationnist energy of the kingdom.”

“Yes… And no. Creation was consumed with the death of the royal lineage, who were also the last of their species, only maintained alive by that flame. With them gone, there is no one able to channel their power enough to keep creationnist energy like you knew it. This flame is not a remainder. It’s a catalyst.”

“Huh.”

There is something she’s not telling me, again, in her tone of voice. some sort of fear, some sort of longing. But I’m too tired to go deeper. I only want to sleep, sleep and hope I won’t wake up in this life.

Even though eternal punishment would be waiting for me at the end it would always be better than her eyes burning with hatred.

Desire is still standing in front of the flame.

“Do you know what I’m trying to do ?”

I shrug. Something that has to do with awakening a power bigger than the gods to end that fucking thing. And the war that is starting in the fields in front of Wake’li. A war I can’t partake in, because it would be too early for me to die that stupidly.

“Vaguely.”

“Do you think I can do it ?”

I roll my eyes.

“You’re asking a scientist to give a result on something that has never in all life been tested. Sure, I can think, but what good would it prove, anyway ?”

“I underestimated your pragmatism, it seems. You’re not keen on encouragement, are you?”

“Never has been, never will be. Did you ask for support or facts ?”

“Good point.”

She laughs a little bit, before looking again at the flame.

“Do you know what I’ll be able to do if I do it ?”

“Not quite. Kill that bastard of a giant critter over there ?”

“I mean, yeah, but not only.”

She is still back turned on me, still standing, still immobile. Her hand is, I notice it now, right in the middle of the flames. It doesn’t consume her, apparently, her skin and flesh stay pristine. But she doesn’t get her hand out.

“I will be able to wield a power big enough to mold the world like I want to. I could give you what you wanted for good. What would you wish for, if I could give you all ?”

That’s a difficult question. What would I wish for when every last one of my reasons to live disappeared with no chance of coming back ? I have only some days to live and even then, I wouldn’t have anything to live with. Anything to live for.

What then ? Do I ask for life and live the bland existence of the one that always will be alone ? Or worse, of the one you call only when you need him ? The one you run away from ? Or do I ask for death and leave behind me nothing but a meaningless existence ? What do I want from life that doesn’t need a sacrifice ?

My lack of answer is apparently not of Desire’s taste, because she grits her teeth.

“Her again ?”

A painful smile grows on my lips.

“What for ? She hates me, and loving me would take everything I cherished away from her. Even if you could grant me life, Desire, it would only be meaningless.”

“What, then ?”

“What could I wish for ? I had illusions all my life, but the truth is I led an existence as nothing more than a tool or a monster.”

And tools or monsters cant wish

for

anything at all.

Silence falls on the basement. The flame burns brighter. And for minutes I thought I won’t have any answers, before she turns around, and I see something I’d never thought I see in the corner of her eye.

“I do not see you as either a tool or a monster.”

And strangely I want to believe her.

Because in all the years I knew her and looked at her face never have I seen a single tear.

***

Universe is looking at what’s left of the Worm, godless and exploded out of creation leaving only behind dust and the traces of its existence. Everything is now over, and even though I hear faint crying on the battlefield, there is no sounds of battle.

We won.

And I’m still alive.

I spent three days in that room, slipping Desire some magic, helping her control hers. It helped me regain a bit of control over my brain, enough to not explode yet, but what really saved me is one single word out of the mouth of that strange goddess now possessing my…

Huh. I don’t know what word to use. Partner in crime, perhaps ?

Anyway. The First God, or whatever she is, is still possessing her. I won’t say a word, because we kinda needed her to win at that point, but I really don’t like that situation. Is Desire going to stay like that forever ? I don’t like this. I don’t like this at all.

Lina, next to me, is grunting.

“Okay. Now that we got worm dust and an army running away from my castle, can someone explains to me what the fuck is going on ?”

Desire, or rather, Universe, turns towards her purple eyes.

“Nothing, Lina Frosilaen. Just my awakening.”

“You’re not making any fucking sense.”

“Am I? Maybe I should smite you for that disrespect.”

And Lina, for once in her life, shuts up. Maybe because she finally realized that Desire’s voice is not Desire, or maybe it’s because her body is now squirming, trying to fight that amount of power.

Universe rolls her eyes.

“Can you stay put, Desire ? I won’t be there for long, you’re the one restraining me.”

“Let’s see if I got that properly," interjected Asura with a wary expression. “You are not Desire, but rather the power she tried to awaken during those last four days. And now you want to gain… Or regain autonomy but she’s stopping you. On what grounds ? You don’t look like a power a mere goddess can control.”

I would be insulted for the use of “mere” goddess if I didn’t witness Universe break an enemy we took so long to fight in only one word. But I’m still surprised by her precedent affirmation. Why is Desire restraining her ? The fight proved the power of her mother is not something you can control. If she continues, she may end up hurt in the process.

I don’t want that.

I don’t want to ever see her agonize.

Universe crosses Desire’s arms, a bored expression on her face. It doesn’t suit her at all.

“You’re right on many points. I don’t intend to stay any longer under the yoke of that pest, and nor do I intend to hurt you. I just want to spend some time with my daughter, see what I missed in this word. But she wants to… extort from me a last service before I leave.”

“That is ?”

She sighs, before turning her head towards me.

“Well, she wants me to definitively stabilize the sovereign of magic. In a physical, mental, magical, and… Sexual way, apparently.”

wh.

wait.

wHAT ????

I’m not the only one surprised, apparently. Lina looks like she just swallowed a big chunk of Heir viscera. And I won't talk about Asura whose jaw is somewhere on the floor, stupefied by whatever just got out of Universe’s mouth. She turns her head towards me, and I feel her eyes piercing me, in a mix of disgust and astonishment.

My cheeks are probably completely blue with embarrassment, but I still have the energy to shout.

“Hey, don’t fucking look at me like that! I have no damn idea what she’s talking about!”

“Mairù Claro and women, once again striking, she sneers, putting a hand on her forehead. You really have no idea ?”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean ?!”

Worst is, I hear from what’s left of the infirmary a double laugh that I know damn well whose it is. And I’m getting fucking tired of this shit. Now is the moment you choose to be little siblings ??

“Eat your damn shit, Baku, Akira ! I didn’t ask for your mockery!”

Of course, the laughs don’t stop. And Universe is still looking at me, quite expectantly. I think she’s waiting for something.

“What do you think about all that ?”

What, me ? She’s asking for MY input ? It’s even more surprising than Desire admitting she wants to fuck me. Because well I’m not gonna lie, now I think I should have seen that coming.

Trying to hide the embarrassment, I cross my arms and stare at her right in those damn purple eyes.

“You think I would spit on an opportunity to finally live my life without pain and the risk of exploding at every damn moment ?”

“Funny. I would have thought you’d rather die.”

Well.

That is kinda true.

I did want to die. Moments before. days before. I don’t know.

But now when I think about the possibility of me dying it’s just. That would be such a waste. I didn’t die during that giant ass battle, why would I die now ? And if I don’t die, I will take the opportunity to live. And live however I want to.

However I want to…

“Yeah, well, suicidal phase over. People would be too happy I’d disappear anyway.”

And I’m certainly not gonna let that happen. If I have to live, I will annoy everyone that thought I would die soon in a way they won’t forget.

If I can live, I'd rather live a life for people who believed I could. Like the little woman restraining the mother of all life with all her body and might just to give me that chance.

Universe smiles. Then open her mouth. And the litany of words that gets out of it sends all of us into a deep, deep sleep.

***

“You still think life is unfair now ?”

I have woken up from one of my first full nights of sleep in ages, and Desire is on top of me, her transparent dress not covering anything. I can still see the marks I gave her earlier in the day, everywhere on her chest and prominent belly, where my child is preparing to be born. I’m sure I’m in a worse state. Gods, apparently, mark as well as sovereign of magic when both of them want to, and I desperately want to keep a trace of her on me.

I laugh, kiss her right next to that cute smirk, and bring her closer.

“Abyss yes. How is a man supposed to get immortality, full power with no repercussions and a woman that perfect without thinking how life is unfair to the poor saps that won’t get the same chance ?”

“Sweettalker.”

“Always for you, sweetheart.”

Her laugh joins mine while she lays down on me, her pregnant belly weighing against my stomach. She’s heavy, but I would admit that for nothing, because that means she would move, and I don’t want her to move.

“Up to do something today ? We could go to the castle and annoy Lina, or just stay here for a little while to do some… Sport.”

“We were at it for five DAYS.”

“And I’m still a goddess, my dear. Plus, from what I’ve seen, your body is reacting very well to your newfound infinite endurance.”

“I’m beginning to think I’m nothing but a sex toy to you, love. A very useful, extremely multitasking and always willing sex toy.”

Her laugh rings in my ear, the sound of it rippling through my body.

“You wound me. Alright mister, no sex for you!”

“You’ll yield before me, you cute little horndog.”

“Then no hugs.”

She looks at me with a victorious smile while I burst out laughing.

“Please, no! My heart won’t handle it !”

“Liar! You don’t have any heart !”

“And the fact you asked for my dick to be regenerated rather than my heart is saying a lot about you, honey!”

She hits me playfully with the back of her hand, or tries to anyway, since I catch her right in the act and make her roll on the bed. We spend a little time like this, just playfully fighting, ignoring the sheets and pillows going everywhere in the room. There’s no one to hear us anyway, this far in Liovelnis’s desert.

Finally I yield, and she climbs once again on top of me, just plopping on my chest. Intrigue the first she’s adorable when she pouts like that.

But because I’d rather see her smile, I stroke her hair gently, and bring her closer. I have no heart for her to hear beating, it’s true, but it’s for her nonetheless.

I let her put her head in the curve of my shoulder and smile.

“I love you.”

She kisses my collarbone with the exact same smile.

“I love you too.”

#hel is talking #hel ocs #lysara ibruael #lysara #hel stories #hel writing #I kindaaa intended for this to be short but I spent two days writing it and Docs is telling me it's 30 pages sooooooo #sorry if you find that long #but they're cute anyway #even for a manipulative goddess that like her men being murderous scientist rats #and said murderous scientist rat

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businessbois · 3 years

Note

You know an argument that kinda bothers me but I also kinda agree with is that the fandom had unrealistic expectations for c!Philza by latching onto him as a parental figure. I agree somewhat, but at the same time Philza did set himself up to be if not a father figure, than a mature presence on the SMP, saying he was going to come in and fill up creeper holes, saying he'd guide Tubbo, cc!Philza saying multiple times that Tommy was his character's kid. Our expectations weren't based on nothing.

yeah for sure! he did join and was like “whatever tommy and tubbo do, ill follow them.” we didn’t pull the dadza thing outta nowhere. i honestly wasn’t expecting him to be dadza at all until he said those things. even before he joined, he said things on stream like “stop being a terrorist” and “motherfucker it does not stay in the pit” but beyond that, i do dislike c!phil for reasons beyond being a bad father. (although, being a bad father is plenty of a reason to not like someone) he’s a literal terrorist. he’s a condescending asshole. he makes my blood boil and maybe its just because i cannot stand any man who says the words “you’ll understand someday” but i want him to face consequences for these things

okay and i’ve got a lotta pent up opinions about the phil being a father figure things so here they go. even if he’s not tommys dad canonically or biologically or whatever, he was still wilburs and look how that turned out. he was fundys grandfather and pretty damn shit at that too.

now, he also was clearly a trusted adult figure to tommy and tubbo. maybe he isn’t tommy’s canonical father, but people say that he didn’t know the kid at all and that just cannot be true. the way they act just reads like they have history. tommy shouts “philza minecraft?” in shock and joy when he first joins. he and tubbo are overjoyed that philza minecraft is now on the server. they’ve always acted like they’ve known each other whether that be because wilbur took tommy in pre-dsmp or they met some other way. (id always thought of them as having known each other from smpe but the canonicity of that is shaky. mcc is also a possibility idk. canons confusing) phil visits tommy in exile and gives him a friendship emerald and tommy slippers. indications that he’s supposed to care about this kid. he says “carls okay. technos okay. tommys okay. thats all i wanted to know.” indications that at some point he cared about tommys safety. he also told tommy “we told you dream wasn’t good for you” (hows that for having no clue about what dream did to tommy in exile so its completely okay to team up with him) so at the very least, he used to care about this kid, knew he was in a toxic environment, and had like two whole conversations with him after that until blowing up his country. from tommy’s side we have his excitement in the grand finale "AND PHIL'S HERE" "i am feeling alone. where is dadza?" the heartbroken "philza minecraft?"s from doomsday. indications that he trusted phil. looked up to him. and that trust was broken.

i just don’t understand how he knew every single person in the government, was supposed to care about those people in the government, and then decided that destruction and violence were the way to go. “the government killed my son” no, you did that, philza minecraft. the government is your grandson, a kid who looks at you like a father figure, and fucking alex quackity. and now you’re trying to kill them. like, who are you protecting by destroying lmanburg? he says “people can’t be replaced” as he lets dream drop tnt on people and techno shoot fireworks at people. he meant technoblade. he literally only gives a shit about technoblade, the man who has taken canon lives from these irreplaceable people. literally what lesson are you trying to teach here and why can it not be accomplished by talking? tubbo is eager to listen and learn, he was crying out for help his entire presidency and all your earthly wisdom did him a fat load of good there

it’s because phil, like technoblade, has only ever seen lmanburg as a government, not “the friendship” or “togetherness” or “people” that it was. “i have no loyalty to lmanburg” phil says despite spending the past few days bonding with every member of the cabinet. like he really somehow managed to separate tubbo the struggling child president terrified of the man who once took a life from him from the tubbo he was willing to advise and follow. advise him now. violence isn’t the way. tell him that. you think governments bad? tell him that. tubbo was desperate for guidance thats why he got caught along in the butchers army. they were all desperate and terrified and so they did bad things. surely you can recognize that? but no, philza minecraft—like technoblade and like dream—only speaks on language. one day they’ll understand. one day they’ll speak it too.

did this literally just turn into a ramble about my feelings on c!phil? yes im so so sorry. this is a monster and im not even gonna try and go back and proofread it

also,, phil said it wasn’t up to him to decide if he was canonically tommys dad, but rather tommy. and tommy’s been playing it as “where’s dadza?” “and then he’ll pat me on the back and he’ll teach me to ride a bike” “are you proud?”

at any rate, being a bad/disappointing father figure is not any better than be a bad/disappointing biological father. but yeah, all the familial complications aside, i think terrorism is bad and i dont like this man.

#long post #c!phil negativity #i adore cc!phil please have that on record #this is not well written or concise or eloquent at all because i literally just did not stop typing #cheers for the ask #dsmp analysis

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nashibirne · 3 years

Text

Please don't stop the music

Pairing: Clark × y/n / reader

Summary: Clark Kent is your neighbour and good friend but over the last months you've fallen in love with him. Clark has no clue because you're way too shy to make a move on him. So you yearn for him secretly. Until today...

Credits: This was inspired by @fuckoffbard 's fantastic playlists for some of Henry's characters. Check them out, there's such a lot of great, inspiring music to discover!

Warnings: pure fluff, lots of kissing and smut too, virgin reader, deflowering, first time, sex, unprotected sex, all vanilla and sweet, friends to lovers, nsfw, 18+

Unbeta'ed! English is not my mother tongue, so read with caution.

This is my first try to write from reader's perspective. There's a lot of "you" and "he" in it but I hope it's okay.

Tags:

@agniavateira @lunedelorient @inlovewithhisblueeyes @willkatfanfromasia @hell1129-blog @mis-lil-red

So...let's get the party started

"That was delicious, Clark. The best chicken pot pie I've ever had." You lean back in your chair with a satisfied sigh, placing a hand on your belly. "Thanks. It's my mum's recipe. I'm glad you liked it." "I did. It will take some beating to make something better next friday."

You have established kind of a habit over the last few weeks. Every Friday night you cook for each other and watch Netflix together afterwards. This week it's been Clark's turn to cook for you in your apartment. Those nights are heaven and hell at the same time for you. It's heavenly to spend so much time with him, to be close to him but the constant secret craving is dreadful. You could do something about it, sure, but that would mean to lower your guard, to expose yourself, to run the risk of getting rejected and hurt and even worse of losing Clark as a friend.

Apart from the fact that you are almost pathologically shy you wouldn't even know how to make a move on him because you've never done something like this before. You have never confessed your feelings for someone, you've never made the first step. You've never been in a relationship. You have never done more than kissing. You are a grown up woman and still a virgin.

At least in real life. In your fantasy you are an experienced badass of a woman, in your dreams you are a self-confident bomb shell, in the short stories you secretly write you do all the naughty things you've never done in reality though you'd love to. Your fictional alter ego does all the things you yearn for. She's straight forward, extroverted, sexy. The hottest guys fall for her as soon as they lay eyes on her. She knows how to please a man and how to make a man please her. She knows no limits, no taboos, no coyness.

And thanks to internet research, porn, fan fiction and masturbation you know everything about sex - technique, positions, kinks, toys, language. You're a pro in theory and clueless in real life.

"So what about some music." Clark interrupts your thoughts. Still a little absent you point at your mobile. "Sure, just choose a playlist. The app should be opened."

You regret your words as soon as they've left your mouth.

Shit.

Clark grabs your phone and starts scrolling through the music app.

Please, don't see it. Please, don't see it. Please, don't see it.

"You have a playlist called Clark?"

Fuck!

"Umm...yes?"

He chuckles and gives you a funny look. His beautiful blue eyes find yours and your heart starts racing.

"Why?"

"What do you mean why? Just because." How can you ever explain to him that this playlist includes all the cheesy, steamy, sad and cheerful songs that make you think about him. That you listen to when you daydream about him.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Clark laughs, leaning forward, cocking his head. "You make a playlist and name it after me for no reason?"

Ground swallow me up...

"Who says I named it after you?" You cross your arms in front of your chest defensively.

"So there's another man called Clark in your life? Who's he?"

Think for heaven's sake. Think.

"Well...um..."

"Yes?" Clark grins, obviously having fun watching your attempt to wriggle out of this situation.

"Well, if you must know...you're right. It is named after you. It was supposed to be a surprise. I put all the songs in it, I think you might like. I planned to send you the link for your birthday."

Good...badass move.

You sigh with relief a little too loud.

"Oh really? That's nice. Great idea actually."

"Thanks."

"Can we listen to it?"

"No! Of course not. You'd spoil the surprise!"

"Oh, come on, y/n. You have seven months left to add new songs."

Shit.

Without waiting for permission Clark starts the playlist and you're horrified when you hear 'Addicted' by Saving Abel. Of all songs he's chosen one of the sexiest. Heaven help!

"Never heard of this one. Sounds great. I like Rock." Clark says, listening to the lyrics carefully.

I'm so addicted to

All the things you do

When you're going down on me In between the sheets

Oh the sounds you make With every breath you take

It's unlike anything When you're loving me

"Interesting choice." he mumbles with a smirk and a wink that makes you blush.

"Yeah...now give me my phone."

"No way." Clark laughs and skips to the next song. You smile when 'Chicken Fried' by the Zac Brown Band starts playing. This song feels like home for you and you love imagining you and Clark visiting a bar that plays country music where you have a beer and dance all night long.

You know I like my chicken fried

Cold beer on a Friday night

A pair of jeans that fit just right

And the radio up

You can't help but nod your head to the rhythm, humming along. Clark raises an eyebrow, watching you curiously, a smile playing on his lips. "So what's next?"

'I wanna kiss you all over' by Exile sounds from the little Bluetooth speaker on the table now.

I wanna kiss you all over

And over again

I wanna kiss you all over

Till the night closes in

"Oohh..." Clark wiggles his eyebrows. "Seventies rock...really?"

"Yes. Really." you snap and grab for your phone but Clark's too fast. He grabs it first and presses it to his broad chest.

"Come on, Kent. Choose another playlist. That's stupid." You are really annoyed and embarrassed now.

"Why? It's pretty interesting which kind of songs you've chosen for me. Tim McGraw, Chris Stapleton, Jeff Bates..seems I strike you as a country guy." He scrolls through the playlist with a big grin. "And what's that?" He starts laughing again, skipping to the next song. "Barry Manilow?"

'Can't smile without you' That's maybe the cheesiest song ever but you love it so so much. Every single word of the lyrics expresses what you feel for Clark so accurately. The melody makes you so happy, everytime you hear it you picture yourself and Clark as a happy, loving couple, spending a wonderful day in the park. Just like the couples in chick flicks do it all the time. Kissing and laughing and holding hands, making a little picnic on the lawn beside a lake, drinking champagne and eating strawberries from each other's hands.

And you see I can't smile without you

I can't smile without you

I can't laugh and I can't sing

I'm finding it hard to do anything

You see I feel glad when you're glad

I feel sad when you're sad

If you only knew what I'm going through

I just can't smile without you

You sigh thinking about it but Clark is close to a laughing fit. "Please, y/n. Tell me you don't seriously think I like that kind of music." He wipes away a tear from the corner of his eye. You press your lips together unable to say anything. You realize you're on the brink of bursting into tears and you get up from your chair quickly.

"Just delete the songs you don't like, there's no need to make fun of me." You turn around and stare out of the window, no longer able to hold back tears.

"Hey, y/n. What the hell...." Clark is by your side within seconds. He looks at you with a worried and confused expression. "Hey." he says softly again. "What's up, why are you crying?" He takes you by your shoulders gently and turns you around to make you look at him. "I'm sorry. I was just teasing you. Please...don't cry."

You sob and rub your eyes to stop the tears from falling.

"No, I'm sorry. I'm being ridiculous. It's just...that stupid playlist. You weren't supposed to see it..."

"It's not really a birthday surprise, is it?"

You shake your head.

"So what is it."

You don't dare to look at him. You just stare at your feet without saying a word.

"Y/n?" He touches your shoulder and a shiver runs down your spine.

"I can't tell you." you whisper.

"Why not?"

"It's silly."

"I'm sure it's not. Just tell me, okay?"

You lift your head to look at him. You gulp when you realize how close he's standing to you. His eyes meet yours and he gives you an encouraging nod. "Okay. I'm going to tell you under one condition."

"Yes?"

"Promise me not to say anything about it. I tell you what the playlist is about and you won't say a word, okay? We will never talk about this again."

Clark stares at you for several seconds. "Okay." He finally agrees with a frown.

You swallow hard, closing your eyes, taking a deep breath before you open them again. Clark takes your hands in his. "Whatever it is. You can tell me." You know he wants to reassure you but to feel your hands in his makes you even more nervous. At the same time you would never want to let go because the sensation of closeness and intimacy is so incredible. You clear your throat, knowing full well that it's too late to back down.

You can do this.

"The playlist... It's not for you it's more...about you." You look him in the eyes and he smiles at you, nodding slightly, indicating to you to go on. "All these songs, they are somehow connected to you. They remind me of you. They make me think about you. They make me dream about you." Your voice fades into a whisper. "Because I'm in love with you."

You lower your eyes and stare at your feet. Several seconds pass before you feel his finger under your chin. Clark lifts your head gently and makes you look at him. He keeps his promise and doesn't say a word. Instead he brings his lips close to yours and you look at him with surprise. In his eyes you see happiness and lust and you gasp when you realize that he's about to kiss you.

When his lips touch yours, time seems to stand still. When he starts kissing you tenderly the world stops turning for a moment. The kiss intensifies and you feel like you're melting in his embrace, in his strong arms. You feel his hands on your waist, sliding under your blouse and you mirror his actions, following his lead. When he feels your touch he moans softly into your mouth.

Clark pulls away and breaks the kiss, he's just as breathless as you. "Am I allowed to say something? Not related to the...you know what." he asks with a smirk.

You giggle and nod your head. "Sure."

He cups your face with his big hands and looks you deep in the eyes.

"I'm in love with you too, y/n. More than you can imagine maybe. More than I could have imagined before I met you."

"Clark..." You kiss him again and things heat up quickly. You can feel his fingers all over your body, his lips all over your skin. You can tell how aroused he is by the huge bulge in his jeans that presses against you. His moans are so incredibly sexy, the way he whispers naughty little things into your ear makes you shiver. Your panties are soaked and you wonder if this is normal or if he's going to be disgusted when he finds out.

You get your answer only seconds later. Clarks hand is between your thighs now, wandering higher, underneath your skirt, until it reaches your crotch. It slides over your panties between your legs with light pressure which causes you to sigh with lust and desire.

"You're all wet for me." Clark whispers in your ear. "So sexy..." He's heavily breathing now and you get turned on even more. "I want you. I want you so much" he moans into your neck, his hands on your breasts playing with your nipples.

"I want you too, Clark." You groan loudly, when sucks on the sensitive spot above your collarbone.

He pulls away, gives you a smirk and takes your hand, leading you to your bed, that is placed in the corner of your one-room-apartment.

You're about to lay down but he stops you.

"Not so fast." He kisses you again and then he begins to take off his clothes. When he's done and you finally dare to take a look, you can't help but let out a little whistle. "Wow. You're shredded...and...big." You're amazed and scared at the same time.

Jesus. How's this supposed to fit?

Clark seems to read your mind. "Don't worry, you're gonna like it." He gives you a sexy lopsided smile and pulls you close. The next round of hot, passionate kisses follows and he starts to unbutton the light summer blouse you're wearing and strips it off you body. You take off your skirt and feel very self-conscious when you stand so close to him in only your underwear.

"Look at you. You're beautiful." Clark whispers in your ear while he unclasps your bra. Only seconds later it lands beside the bed together with your panties.

"You're beautiful." He repeats and you blush. You reach out your hand and touch his chest. He grabs your hand and presses it on the spot above his racing heart. You're relieved that he seems to be a little nervous too. He grins and gives you a light, playful push and you fall on your bed, landing on your back. When you smile at him he plops down on the bed right by your side and kisses you again. Your hands start exploring your naked bodies. You touch Clark's cock shyly and caress it carefully. It feels wonderful, smooth like velvet and hard as a rock.

"Fuck, y/n. That's great. So hot..." Clark growls in a dark voice full of arousal and he starts stroking your pussy. His fingers run through your wet folds and he rubs your clit, making you whimper with pleasure.

"Oh god." you sigh. This feels so much better than you could ever have imagined. So much better than doing it yourself. He's rough and gentle at the same time and you love it.

When you feel one of his fingers at your entrance you flinch.

"Clark, wait!" You make him stop before he pushes in.

"What's wrong?"

"I've never done this before."

"This?" He's visibly confused.

"Sex." you say, giving him a sheepish smile.

Clark sits up straight, taken by surprise.

Shit...Mood killer

"You're a virgin?" he asks with an amazed frown.

"Yes. I'm sorry..."

"There's no reason to be sorry, babe. I just wasn't expecting that. It's okay." He gives you a tender little kiss. "We don't have to do it tonight, if you don't want to. We can wait. Do it another time."

Nope. Not gonna happen.

"No! I've waited long enough. I want this. I want to sleep with you. Tonight. Now." You say insistently. "I just wanted you to know why I'm so clumsy and insecure."

"You're not clumsy. You are doing this perfectly."

"Okay." You sigh with relief.

"So do you want me to go on?" You feel his fingers on your pussy again.

"Yes." You moan.

Clarks starts pleasuring you with his hand again. He stimulates your clit, strokes your folds and gently fingers you, finding your g-spot without problems and soon you're a panting, whimpering mess.

"Clark...fuck..."

"You like that, y/n?"

"I do. I'm close..."

"Then come for me, babe."

And that's what you do. You close your eyes and a powerful orgasm runs through your body, causing you to convulse with loud shrieks and long, lustful moans. When you look at Clark again he smirks and carefully climbs on top of you.

"Are you ready for me?"

"Yes." You nod eagerly.

"Sure? I need to hear that you want this, angel."

"I want it. Fuck me, Clark." You hiss when you feel the tip of his huge dick press against your entrance.

"I'll be careful. I promise." He smiles and strokes your cheek. "Whenever you feel uncomfortable just tell me and I'll stop, okay?"

"Okay."

Clark kisses a trail from your mouth down your neck to your tits where he sucks your nipples, gently biting them. You sigh and you can't wait to feel him inside of you. You lift your hips and Clark slowly pushes his cock into your pussy, bit by bit he enters you carefully and it feels sensational. He stops when he reaches your hymen and then he quickly pushes through. The pain you feel is sharp but it's over in the blink of an eye and all you feel afterwards is pleasure. The pleasure of Clarks dick stretching you to the max, filling you completely.

"You're ok?" He looks at you, searching your eyes for any sign of pain or disapproval.

"I'm good. This feels great." you whisper and when he starts moving carefully with slow, short thrusts you moan his name again and again.

"Fuck, you are so tight...this is...spectacular." Clarks voice is raspy and he picks up speed a little. "You take me so well, babe." He moans out of breath. "I'm close."

His thrusts get harder and faster but he's still careful and gentle. It doesn't take him long to cum hard with a loud growl. He collapses on top of you and you kiss passionately, hugging each other tightly while his dick is still inside of you. When he finally pulls out and rolls off you both sigh in unison.

"That was wonderful, Clark."

"Did it hurt?" He looks at you with a worried expression on his handsome face.

"Just a tiny little bit." You say and rest your head on his chest, playing with his chest hair.

You giggle when you hear 'Tennessee Whiskey" by Chris Stapleton sounding from the speaker.

"The playlist is still running. Maybe I should stop it." you say, ready to get up and look for your phone but Clark stops you.

"Don't" he murmurs. "Your playlist is perfect. So please don't stop the music."

"Sure?"

"Sure. Can't wait to make love to you to every single song." And with a smirk on his lips he falls asleep and you close your eyes too, feeling immensely happy, satisfied and loved.

#henry cavill #henry cavill fandom #cavillry #clark kent #clark x reader #clark kent x y/n #smut

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quackibread · 3 years

Text

Lily Of The Valley

sypnosis: everything comes with a price. not everyone can get what they want. even the most powerful ones.

warnings: mentions of death, war, a brief mention of manipulation, explosions and a funeral.

pairing: c!dream x gn!reader

masterlist

It was the finale of the war. You knew the exact time that you would be facing off. It confused you to see green on top these obsidian grids above L'Manburg.

You built up to it, seeing Technoblade and Dream. They were looking around making sure everythint was in place. They placed explosives that would surely destroy this country. You watched in horror as they placed more and more explosives.

"W-What are you doing?" You asked, stuttering. The pair stopped as they heard your faint voice.

"Making sure we win, Y/N." Dream replies nonchalantly, continuing with his work.

"This isn't fair, Dream. This isn't the agreed time. This isn't what we talked about." you say over the howling wind.

"All is fair in love and war, Y/N." Dream replied once more, making his way to you.

He tilted your chin to look up at him. His mask was on the side and you can see his emerald eyes. You cupped his cheek with your hand, looking at him sorrowfully.

"This isn't the Dream I know." You whisper as tears pooled your eyes.

"I'm still me, N/N." He whispers back.

"Don't call me that, Clay. You and I both know you changed because of the power you wanted." You exclaimed harshly. You removed his hand from your chin and began to walk away. The one-block bridges were making you more nauseous than your problems.

"N/N, you know I had to do it. I can't just have some irresponsible 17-year-old running a country." Dream explained.

"So you emotionally manipulated him? Made him exile his own best friend?" You replied with a scoff.

Dream always hated arguing with you. He knew that you'd do anything to prove your point. At this moment, he was starting to think if he did change. After all, your words always mattered to him. His thoughts were cut short by an explosion. Technoblade had began to light up the TNT.

Obsidian was in fact sturdy and blast-proof. You, however, weren't. The force of the explosions knocked you off the obsidian grid. Dream felt his knees go weak as he watched you pummel to the ground. But in the end, all he could do was scream your name.

______

You weren't exactly sure what was happening. Your vision was blurred and your memory was hazed. All you could comprehend was the night sky.

There, the moon shined brightly. It glowed more than the specks of stars scattered across the sky. It distracted you from everything that was happening.

You could hear screams, shouts, and cries of your name. You were falling, it seemed. You tried to grab at anything to stop you from pummeling to the ground. But, it was too late.

You had hit one of the craters that the explosives created. Your body came in contact with the ground with a heavy thud. Someone cried out your name. You knew exactly who it was. It was your favorite person. That was the moment Dream realized he couldn't always have everything he wanted.

Your vision darkened and darkened. Soon, you succumbed to it. You didn't feel any pain. It felt like peace. It was quiet and lonely. But maybe it wouldn't be so lonely for long.

________

After the battle, Dream craddled your deceased body. He let out sobs and wails. He keeps forgetting that every good thing has a price. Despite getting the power over everyone, he lost something precious to him.

Tommy and Tubbo felt a huge weight on their shoulders. They convinced you to fight alongside them. You were their guardian and safety. The pair of them couldn't help but stare as Dream held you. Not just them. But the those who were in battle too.

________

"It doesn't feel fair. It hurts... every god awful day it hurts. More and more." He cried out in your shared home. It had been a few days since your death. Since your last canon life was taken.

No one tried to approach him. He was still a loose cannon. The pain your death brought to him was unbearable. More so because he knew he could've stopped it. But he didn't. You were like a precious gem. Something he'd always protect. But treasure shouldn't remain hidden. Not even at the hands of death.

____________

Your funeral paved the way for a moment of peace. Dream had instructed everyone to get your favorite flower, the Lily of The Valley. It was pure white, symbolizing peace and unity. Something you have longed for before your passing.

Dream could easily compare you to the flower. You were a pure soul. You always fought for what you thought was right, even if it meant going against him. It was a rare flower, too. Just like you.

#dream #mcyt #dream mcyt #dream smp #dreamwastaken imagine #dreamwastaken x reader #dreamwastaken x you #dream smp x you #dream smp x reader #dream mcyt oneshot

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enha-woodzies · 3 years

Text

➸ CHAPTER 8 | " AFIRE LOVE "

starring: enhypen ft. i-land daniel

pairing: jungwon x fem!reader x sunghoon

genres: royal au, romance, angst, slowburn, 18th century setting

word count: 3.8k

warning: very mild swearing; brief arguments

taglist: @serendipitysung (betareader) @angeljungwon @en-sun @affectionaterainoflove @renkiv @softforjungwoo @jislix @gyeraniee @fluffi @stxrryemxlys @jungwon-luv-bot @lost-lepord-beanie @hyunsunge

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a/n: this has been the longest chapter in the series so far and i'm loving it. grateful for taylor swift's songs that helped me through this chapter also,, please listen to exile as it ideally expresses the ruination between jungwon and y/n (and also an addition to the burning feels,, ㅋㅋ)

Daniel paid a visit to the Royal Garden to fetch his brother, Jungwon, a few Catalpa flowers that were freshly scattered on the royal lawn. In hopes that his brother could still mend the book’s soul by giving a home to the fallen blossoms, Daniel obliged to help when he saw Jungwon’s crestfallen state the moment he got home from Kielder Forest the other day.

The tall, plump gent hums a tune, oblivious enough to the presence of the pair that were roaming around the garden prior to his arrival. He peeks through the side as he noted the familiar voice, gently tiptoeing through the crisp, dried leaves and twigs sprawled along the ground. He soon realizes it was the marquess and the young miss, sharing careful whispers that made him eager enough to eavesdrop.

He could hear everything but dare not open his eyes. Daniel knew he must keep still while he waited for the perfect opportunity to run back to their manor, bearing the newfound knowledge he grasped.

If it was Sunoo, he wouldn't have second thoughts. Though Daniel's ordeal prevented him the first time, he soon remembered how menacing Sunghoon was and grew concerned for the young miss’ innocence, all the while hiding among the shrubs for a determined snoop.

“So long as Jungwon keeps his emotions repressed, this ruse shall continue on.”

Daniel’s eyes widened in horror upon hearing the young miss’ affirmation to Sunghoon’s statement.

Without wasting any more of his time, he cautiously bore the silence until he reached the Park’s manor to apprise Niki of such mischief.

“Niki! Niki! Niki”

“What?!”

“Y/n’s made a deal with the devil himself.”

START OF YANG JUNGWON's POV

I sat and observed you reading with your head bowed. The world was quiet and peaceful that night, and your small hand was wrapped around my finger. Your touch brought forth an omnipresent coolness, sending electric tingles throughout my body. My longing for you fitted perfectly in the palm of your freezing hand. We quietly sat there, your head on my shoulder, in a perpetual moment of tender affection; beautiful and serene. The silence was wonderful, and it was utterly a whole different level of ecstasy.

We were ten, and you were starting to doze off.

I was awake and I watched you breathing with your eyes closed and parted lips. You held my Austen book closer to your chest where it can feel your thumping heartbeat. Your newly untied braids were all over your face. Wavy locks everywhere. I gently stroke them away from your cheeks that were of rosy hue due to the chilly night’s air. And because you were dreaming, your little eyelids fluttered. I noticed that. So I tucked you inside our self-made fort, and positioned us in front of your favorite night light— the moon. I sat and observed you, taking note of everything you did and did not do.

Do you recall how we were sitting by the lake that morning? It was the first time I draped my arm around your shoulders. The golden sun reflected on your tinted cheeks just perfectly, gradually seeing them come to a blush. I don’t know if it was a color of a burn from the summer heat, or just simply out of shyness from the flirtatious gesture and dialogues we had shared over time.

That was something I'll never forget. And because it's all I've ever known, I prepared myself for the anticipated goodbye. You caught me off guard, "I'll never depart from you," you said.

We were ten, and I was foolish enough to take those brief moments for granted.

Three years flew by right before our very eyes and the parting of ways came upon us. You begged me not to leave because If I do, you’d curse me for the rest of our lives. But what am I to do? It was university, it was my future… our future, if not dubiously relevant. I may have only been thirteen at the time, but I was certain of you.

But I didn’t listen. I never did.

I left.

And it was then that I realized, my future wasn’t there. It was sitting among the grassy lawn, reading poesies and verses to each other under the incandescent glow of the sunny daze. It was sharing silly whispers and passing secret notes of flatteries, tucking Catalpa flowers behind your ears, or making a beautiful crown out of it for the beautiful princess that’s been hopelessly sitting right under my nose this whole time.

I said, “I won’t ask you to wait if you don’t ask me to stay.” But you did ask me. And I was never ready, so I watched you go. Selfish as I was then, I knew you’d come back to me.

So there I was, sitting in my new room in the dormitory in a big city. I remember I couldn’t sleep the first night. All I did was toss and turn; sheets were shuffling on and on for hours. Like a typical little boy who was taken away from his family. Homesickness as they call it. But I guess mine was sickness for an undeclared love left hanging like our sheer fort on the hopeless branch of the Catalpa tree.

It was colder than I thought it would be. I kept recalling myself leaving. You gave me a yearning look, your gaze bore into my eyes, I swore I heard my heart break into little shards. But the deafening echoes couldn’t be compared to the shattering of yours, and all I ever gave you was goodbye.

I bet you were still up sitting on your chair by the window overlooking the majestic moon, wondering about me. So I tried the hardest to tuck myself in and face the window where your favorite night light was. I kept whispering empty wishes. I wished that I could run back to you.

Many days I thought of writing you letters. It took everything in me not to, as a string was tugging me back, telling me that the little notes I tucked in between the pages of the Austen book that I lent you could suffice for my five-year-long absence. The said string being the educational pressures that were gradually sucking the memories I had left of us.

I hope you know that every time that I didn’t, I almost did.

You embodied many, different ways of every emotion that crept through me. Though I knew it was going to hurt me, I went ahead and did it anyway.

Five years flew by so fast. Or maybe just for me. I finally graduated from university together with your brothers and mine. So much has happened while I was there that I almost didn’t notice the changes in me. There were several fooleries that the boys and I went through just to have a taste of the uncivilized life we weren't raised to have. There was this time I even helped your brother, Niki, with a gruesome fight against some kid who was foretold to be the next duke of our country. Those may be silly times to ponder now, but the damage it did to us and mostly to Niki was inexpressible.

I was eighteen, and the last memories I had of us were from we were ten. Maybe I tried to forget that day badly. That day where I stood and watched you hide behind the trees from afar, keeping those tears to yourself without me anywhere near you to wipe them all away like I always do.

I vowed to not hold myself back and not be held by the agonizing memories of a thousand yesterdays. I never realized how much it still pains you even upon my return.

Both our families held a welcoming back dinner at your place. There we were, after five long years of separation and silence, traipsing down the halls that we once ran through, forcing laughter and faking smiles just so we won’t ruin the genuine delights in our dear mothers’ eyes.

I was only eighteen, I didn’t know much but I knew I missed you. I’d tell you but I don’t know how. I do, however, know where it all went wrong. I just couldn't find the courage in me to approach and ask you for an apology.

Where was I? Where was the boy who’d throw a mantle over your braided locks, pretending to be the wizard to your witch?

Do you still remember? The notes I shamelessly tucked between the Austen book I lent you just to get my silly feelings across? Do you still have these little memories of us collected inside your imaginary heart-shaped locket?

I left many notes there, and though you possibly forgot most of them, they still hung around me, and I could vividly recall them like it was yesterday. From the flirtatious dialogues and striking remarks to the underlined phrases I wholly dedicated to you, the following parchments started to become like an entire page of paper with my inconsistent handwriting.

I vented out my daily adventures and mundane activities into those stained parchments that I stole from my late father’s study. Until suddenly, all the letters were about you. It collected all my immature yet genuine emotions. It was always about you, seldom me, and hardly ever us.

For the many years that I’ve hurt you, left you hanging, and witnessed our promises get constantly broken, I could only hope for better days waiting ahead for us. If not to me, at least to you. You deserve more than I could even offer. You always have, and I'm afraid I may not be a potential candidate to meet you halfway.

A year has passed and we’re now about to be offered for marriage. Not to each other though. There we were, standing in a crowded room under the bedazzling chandeliers and along with the tunes from the people eliciting them.

I felt my hands trembling in fear that eventful night. We exchanged brief and stolen glances and I was desperate to know, was the yearning killing you too?

I saw you nervously pulling your dress in an attempt to look busy, while I was doing my best to avoid you. I’ve never heard silence quite this loud.

Jay gave me the chance to redeem myself. You had no idea how much I desired to secure you in a long and firm embrace the moment you walked closer to me in that library. But you said those words. Yes! Those words were made up of aching memories that lingered around my soul for a while, but I dared not to give any of my attention to.

My deepest apologies for leaving you behind, again.

I dropped your hand while dancing and left you standing there in an awfully eerie room in such a woeful state. I let you slip beyond my reach, and I fear I can't give you any reasons in the aftermath. I was nowhere to be found then, and I hate the crowds, you know that. But I wanted to return to you after I'd composed myself in the powder room, though it utterly shattered me the moment I ran back to the hall.

I saw you dance with him. With the boy who was now a man. The man who was chosen by Niki’s old flame. The old flame that caused the gruesome fight between the two boys several years back. And the man who’s now trying to take you away from my reach; the unreachable string I couldn’t ever pull passionately close to me.

I heard my heart smash to smithereens. I was hopelessly wishing in the back of my mind that you wished it was me. You wished it was me you’re holding firmly in those little, flimsy fingers, lovingly waltzing you to your wildest dreams.

While I just stood there, under the dimly lit corner of the court, dreadfully gazing upon the sight that gave the entire ton heart-shaped eyes and promising prophecies.

My dearest, Y/n. For dearest you will always be. I want you to know that I’d wilfully live and die for moments that we stole on begged and borrowed time.

Because I held my pride like I should've held you.

END OF YANG JUNGWON's POV

The hot topic immediately spread among the Yang and Park siblings the following morning, excluding Y/n’s awareness of such matters. The boys were determined enough to keep their knowledge unsuspected to the mischievous pair. Although Jay and Niki were aggravated by the news, they saw it best to confront their sister in a more fortunate time.

On the contrary, Jungwon is enraged enough to retreat from their manor to give the young miss an impulsive lecture. He sets off with his horse, speedily galloping to the heart of the Kielder Forest.

“Y/n! I know you're here! You and I need to talk!” Jungwon aimlessly calls out as he takes quick steps to where her fort was situated, “Y/n!”

“What?!” The lass crawls out of her sheer fortress, looking utterly pissed with the boy’s sudden commotion.

“Have you lost your wits?!”

“I have no idea what you're talking about, Jung.”

“You made a ruse with Sung- god, Y/n! What were you thinking?!” Jungwon runs his fingers through his ebony locks with definite frustration plastered all over his face, making Y/n flinch from his sudden whine.

“How did you-”

“How I discovered such a ridiculous act isn't of concern right now. Goodness, Y/n, I expected more from you!”

“Well, you should've expected less then!” She fiercely retorts.

“For god’s sake! You don't even know that man!”

“More like I know you? I couldn't even recognize you anymore!”

“That man has set his record with your brother-”

“Do not put Niki into this so as to protect your dying ego.”

“Then what’s all this? What's in it for him, huh? What did you offer Sunghoon that got your mind twisted?”

“A piece of my fucking mind because you were too dumb to even care! And don't you dare speak of him like you're mighty enough to reproach the man whose only desire was to help me!”

“Tell that to your brothers who feel shamefully betrayed right now by your reckless behavior!”

Jungwon heaves a sigh the moment Y/n goes quiet. The atmosphere suddenly went numbingly silent for a while. What with all the nonstop outbursts they both threw at each other, they forgot to stop and catch their breaths in the maddening heat of the moment.

Y/n breaks the deafening silence with light sniffles and soft sobs, tilting her head away from Jungwon’s sight. He witnesses her tears again for the first time in a very long while. It pains him to see her like this, but what shatters his soul, even more, is that he's the reason why her tears keep falling… and he couldn't take a step closer to wipe them away knowing they hadn’t resolved their previous fight.

So he stands there, mere inches away from her, hands so close yet so far, fists clenched tightly to stifle the urge to touch her, until Y/n feels a sudden rush of electricity through her entire body; Jungwon pulled her into a comforting embrace, making her snurfle into the warmth of his chest.

“Forgive me, I… I’m just very disappointed. For the longest time I’ve known you, not once did it ever occur to me that you would go this far to get my attention. I’m just worried for you.” With a hand holding onto her waist tightly, and the other, resting on her nape, Jungwon softly whispers against her ear while stroking her hair gently until her breathing calms down.

Y/n couldn't help but gradually crawl her arms around his slim waist, crumpling a handful of his jabot shirt from the back in desperation to suppress further sobs from embarrassing her. All of her raging thoughts suddenly came to a halt the moment their bodies connected with each other.

It was as if she's meant to be in this moment with him, to bathe in his comfort, to be in this dreamy embrace. It would be a lie for Jungwon to say he didn't want this. He was, after all, anticipating for such a moment to hug her like now. It's quite unfortunate that it had to be under such circumstances.

“Why does my involvement with Sunghoon bother you so much? Is it only because of Niki?” Y/n looks up to Jungwon, making the two merely inches apart from brushing their noses. Jungwon knew that he'd get lost in her compelling eyes, so he stared down at her parted, pinched lips-- though he wished he didn't at that moment, but he was too late. He finds himself running his tongue across his lips, all the while parting it as he tries to think of any far-fetched reasons to answer her question.

He lifts his thumb and grazes it over her flushed cheeks. Her tear-filled eyes still glisten as Jungwon leans closer, making Y/n shut them in an instant. Although she’s quite in a chagrin in their current position, Jungwon finds her unshakable figure as a sign that she's relaxed in his presence, making him feel less deterred from keeping her in his arms a little longer.

The chap plants soft kisses on her closed eyes that made Y/n inhale sharply. The fleeting, feather-like touches on her eyelids were more than enough for the lass to bathe herself in such momentary bliss. The moment she flutters her eyes open, her gaze meets his as he rests his forehead on hers.

“I hate seeing you cry. These beautiful eyes aren't meant for such miseries.” He whispers to which his breaths fan against her exhales.

“You always make me cry.” Jungwon softly chuckles at her slightly pouting lips, simultaneously thinking how lovely would it feel to have his lips locked on hers.

“Jay would genuinely torture me if he sees us right now.” Jungwon scrunches his nose as he playfully bumps it with hers.

“What would he do if he found us out? Let me go then.” She teases. Her hands find their way from his waist, to his nape, while playing with the little mullet he outgrew since the summer.

“I could never.”

Y/n sighs. His words had two meanings and fortunately, she's smart enough to know what he really meant. To answer her previous question, he wanted to tell her how much he loves her-- but his tongue is tied, and he can only let out gentle breaths and husky whispers. He couldn't find any words that would perfectly encompass his brimming emotions to her.

So he fails himself again with a shrug of his thoughts.

“Do you ever think we should just stop doing this?” He asks.

“What do you mean?”

“All these silly banters and stolen, longing stares. Could you be happy here with me?”

“The past few weeks have been nothing but emotional for me, Jung. You shut me out, then you take me back. You anger me lots yet in one swift move, you knock the wind out of my lungs. I’d be lying if I told you I’m not on top of the world sharing this moment with you right now. Because I am. I am happy. I don't think I would be if not with you.”

Then let’s run away right now. Let’s leave everything behind and run away together. There’s nowhere else I’d rather be. That was what he wanted to say. But he gulps down all other thoughts and lets out the opposite.

“Come on. I’ll walk you home.” He says.

The trip home was merely nothing but laughter and barbs as Jungwon shares embarrassing stories of her brothers while they were in university; trying their very best to ignore the desperate elephant in the room.

With hands constantly brushing against each other as they take their every step, Jungwon was downright close to seizing her hand completely and interlocking it with his.

“To be fair, this has been the only thing that's made the past agonizing weeks bearable.” He concludes the uplifting momentum as they walk closer to her humble abode.

“I'm ready to try again if you are?” Y/n mutters under her breath, but Jungwon clearly caught every single word. He slowly pulls away from the almost closed gap between them, looking at the ground like he always does when he's conflicted.

“What is it, Jung? Have I said something wrong?”

Jungwon shrugs his head in disapproval, though he wishes she hadn't said those words.

“I… I’m sorry. It's just…”

Jungwon thought there should've been a time and place, but this wasn't it. He doesn't want to take advantage of her vulnerability right now especially when Jay's trusted him enough to not fuck things up. With Sunghoon in the way and Niki's emotions in turmoil, he couldn't bear inserting himself in the middle of chaos, insinuating confusions any further when he could've been a better friend to Y/n rather than putting her feelings in silence.

Y/n was expecting this. Every time she and Jungwon would share a rather momentous moment, he’d chicken out and ghost her for however long he desired until he felt the need to pop back into her life again and tug at her heartstrings.

She stares at Jungwon's figure almost disappearing into the wild night. He ran away with deafening thoughts, while she stood there with a crushed heart… again.

With sadness, she realizes they need some time apart.

It's been a long, dragging week for the ton. Tranquil for some, as not many revelations from the Daily Tattle have been uncovered as of late.

The Park siblings have yet to talk about the matter of Y/n being a quisling to Sunghoon's endeavors. As of the moment, the young marquess continues on with his dilly-dallying courtship with the young miss, obliviously promenading her with genuine intentions this time around.

Jungwon and Y/n had only been apart for a week and already, he had a new lover hanging off his arm.

Unbeknownst to Y/n, Jungwon was having troubles with his thoughts and feelings as he saw her, yet again, traipsing around the park with an arm comfortably hanging onto Sunghoon.

With Y/n, he'd had some wonderfully stable times. But seeing how her smiles go from cheek to cheek and echoing laughter with the marquess’ presence makes her genuinely happy, Jungwon thought it’d be best if he stops himself from holding her back and enjoy her liberty without the past binding her like a prisoner of what could’ve been.

Sunghoon looks at her the same way he does. It churns his insides just thinking about it.

Yet he fears this might have to be his time to back away.

That week-long separation seemed to last forever for Jungwon as he finally concludes that he is no longer deserving of her hand anymore. Now that it's apparent that it’s about to be promised to another.

*send me an ask or a message if you wish to be added on this series' taglist!

#kpopscape #enhypenwriters #enhypennetwork #of lords and mischiefs #enhypen angst #enhypen fluff #enhypen imagines #enhypen fics #enhypen series #enhypen jungwon #enhypen heeseung #enhypen jay #enhypen jake #enhypen sunghoon #enhypen sunoo #enhypen niki #iland daniel

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queen-susans-revenge · 3 years

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Welcome to today's episode of Fern Yells At the News!

It's all about the royals of course, because the other news is depressing.

Okay, let's start here. FIRSTLY: You assholes don't know whether Harry and Meghan were invited or not. They have a brand new baby, they weren't going to fly across country for a big party anyway.

SECONDLY: "Team Queen"??? Hahahahaha oh my god you absolute bootlickers, the Queen does not like the Obamas better than she likes her own grandson. Insofar as she is capable of human emotion, I mean. If there is a Team Queen then Harry is on it, although considering the other players (see: Andrew), it's not exactly an honor.

THIRDLY: Humiliation. That is what this faction of the media desperately wants. To see Harry exiled, stripped of titles, tarred and feathered and carried through the town square. All for the unforgivable crime of marrying a mixed-race feminist and subsequently refusing to renounce her, despite the fact that she resolutely (and rudely, in their eyes) remained Black even after the wedding. They HATE to see Harry and Meghan thriving in California because by their very existence that family challenges everything about blood purity and caste, everything the racist Royal Rota hold dear.

SADLY FOR THEM, we Americans are going to continue to shower our Cali prince & princess with love and money. Which leads to a lot of wistful headlines in the UK tabloids about "is Harry losing popularity in America? Maybe now? Maybe today? We said it last month and the month before that and it was never true but maybe if we say it AGAIN we can MAKE it true! Look, they weren't at Obama's birthday party! THE AMERICANS ARE TURNING ON HARRY!"

We are not. Thanks for asking. You can't have your prince back because we are keeping him. Haha you.

Oh God the Markles, okay.

I'm tempted to call them fair game for tabloid fodder, because they are terrible and attention-seeking. Meghan strenuously does not feel that they should be fair game. And of course it sucks for her--this is probably the worst part of the princess gig, all the money that the press will go around handing people to say bad things about you. Remember when they outright offered one of her former costars $70K to lie and say he'd had an affair with her?

The smear campaign against Meghan is calculated, it is orchestrated, it has big money behind it, it has been going on for years, and it has captured the Markles as abjectly willing pawns. Samantha and Thomas Jr. have obviously been seething with jealousy against Meghan since her birth and will quite happily lap up cash to broadcast their spite. When their father married Doria, Samantha called her "the maid," which tells you just about everything about where their hatred for Meghan comes from.

What gets me is the entitlement. Thomas Jr. published a letter telling Harry not to marry Meghan...and he has the unmitigated stupidity to be surprised that he wasn't invited to the wedding! Same with Samantha! She feels that she's owed a big princess to-do because her sister got one, and really it isn't fair that there's no prince whisking her off to a palace, just like all her life it hasn't been fair that Meghan is prettier and smarter and nicer and everyone likes her better. It's hard not to feel a little bit bad for Samantha especially considering her health problems, but on the other hand she is genuinely terrible--again, "the maid"--and has alienated everyone including her own children, so.

Thomas Sr. is a sadder case because Meghan really tried to keep her father in her life. But he lied to her, and lied about her (among other things he claimed she'd never given him money, a claim which court proceedings later proved false). He betrayed her trust again and again. And he's continuing to wage a public blackmail campaign against her. So even if she wanted to, which I'm sure at this point she doesn't, it would be impossible for her to resume contact with Blackmail Dad.

I mean, blackmail is exactly what he's doing and he's being extremely open about it. "If after this interview, if I don’t hear from somebody in 30 days, I’ll give 30 days and I’m going to try again...It's time to look after Daddy."

Amazingly, "it's time to look after Daddy" is not even the grossest thing Thomas Markle has ever said. For my money the grossest thing was "Everything that Meghan is, I made her."

That right there. That is the level of entitlement the Markles feel, apparently have always felt, about Meghan. They feel that they own her. They feel that she has no identity outside them. They take one hundred percent of the credit for each and every one of her accomplishments and they categorically deny her any agency, any self-determination, any credit for her own life.

I honestly think this is an abusive thing to say. ANY time anyone says "I made you everything you are," they are hoping to exploit or abuse you. It's the reddest of red flags. It means they don't even see you as a person. For Thomas to say this about his own daughter is gross and it's so revealing of everything Meghan must have endured in that household. It's impossible for her to have a relationship with someone who asserts that level of control and entitlement to her life and her person. Especially not while they are also doing everything in their power to harm her.

I comfort myself, as I always do, with the knowledge that Meghan is sitting very comfortably indeed. The Markles can't actually touch her. They will never see her again except on a TV screen and magazine covers. They will not get a penny from the royal family. That phone call Thomas is waiting for will never come. Shove your roses up your ass, big guy.

THIS ONE THOUGH. I only have one comment on this one and it's "lol"

#house sussex

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sweetkale · 3 years

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all evidence that points towards Magneto being Jewish before it was first explicitly established in 1991

!!None of this is my writing!! It’s a useful but outdated source that I merely revised to replace the G slur. It was written by Rivka Jacobs and the original can be found at http://www.alara.net/opeople/xbooks/magjew.html

The Magneto Is Jewish FAQ (revised 11/9/98)

Rivka Jacobs

(1) In Uncanny #113 (Classic X-Men #19), the added material has Magneto on Asteroid M, talking about the deaths of Magda, Anya, and he mentions Auschwitz for the first time. "I endured one death camp ... in Auschwitz ... I will not see another people fear what they do not understand and destroy what they fear." Uncanny #113 is from 1978. The additional scenes were included in 1988's Classic X-Men #19. So, we know Magnus was at Auschwitz, a death camp, not just a concentration camp. (Many fans [and writers] seem to get the two types of camps confused). There could have been a number of reasons he was at Auschwitz: he was a Polish political prisoner, a Russian prisoner of war, a member of the French underground, a homosexual from Germany, Roma, or, with a high probability, a Jew. (Out of 1.5 million victims of Auschwitz, between 1.1 and 1.2 million were Jews).

(2) In Uncanny #150 (one of my favorites) Magneto mentions, in a fight with Cyclops, "I know something of grief. Search throughout my homeland, you will find NONE who bear my name. Mine was a large family, and it was slaughtered ... without mercy, without remorse." So that eliminates German homosexual and French partisan, because the entire familes of such prisoners were not slaughtered throughout an entire "homeland." After Magneto thinks he has killed Kitty, he says: "I remember my own childhood ... the gas chambers at Auschwitz, the guards joking as they herded my family to their death. As our lives were nothing to them, so human lives became nothing to me." Storm is about to blast him for "killing" Kitty, and she says, "If you have a diety, butcher, pray to it!" Magneto answers, "As a boy, I believed. As a boy, I turned my back on god forever." So now we know that Magnus is not a political prisoner (German political prisoners were sent to camps on German soil, like Dachau, or Bergen-Belsen), he is not Polish, since whole Polish families were not herded to the gas chambers. The Poles were not the target of pre-meditated Nazi genocide. While the Russian people were the target of genocide, only Russian POWs were in Auschwitz, not whole families. So, we are now left with only two groups of people that Magnus could be from, the Roma and the Jews. Uncanny #150 is from Oct. 1981; already Magnus says something very interesting here. He says he "remembers" the gas chambers of Auschwitz, "remembers" his family being herded, he "remembers" the guards joking. Fact: no one remembers the gas chambers of Auschwitz except in two ways (or three if you believe the dead can speak to the living), either you were a Nazi SS guard or doctor or official, or you were a member of the Sonderkommando. The Sonderkommando, Jewish prisoners who were forced by the Nazis -- in all the death camps -- to do the dirty work of killing. It was Nazi official policy. The Jews, the lowest of the low to the Nazis, in Auschwitz hierarchy, followed by the Russians, and then the Roma, the Jews would be the ones to lead the victims to the gas chamber, to haul the bodies from the gas chambers to the ovens, to burn and bury the dead. The Jews would pull the teeth of the corpses, cut the hair, pile the bodies three at a time on the retorts of the ovens in just the right way. The Sonderkommando had a few kapos (overseers) who were German and Polish prisoners, criminals from civil prisons in Germany and Poland. During the summer of 1944, 19 Russian POWs from Mauthausen were sent to augment the Auschwitz Sonderkommando. Totally documented, on paper and by eye witness accounts. All other members of the Auschwitz Sonderkommando were Jews.

(3) In Uncanny #161, Sept. 1982, we have the story of Xavier's trip to Israel. There he meets Magnus for the first time. However, it should be noted that the entire story is a Charlie-dream, while he is with Lilandra. In Uncanny #161 we see for the first and last time Magnus' tattoo from Auschwitz. His number is #214782. Xavier says, "That tattoo, Magnus, were you ...?" Magnus answers, "Auschwitz. I grew up there." So now we know that Magneto was first in Auschwitz as a very young person, but we can't pinpoint the age yet. Also, his number is high for someone who was there from the beginning of the camp. The first Polish prisoners, like author Wieslaw Kielar, had very low numbers, like in the 200s. Sonderkommando survivor Filip Muller's number was in the 20,000s. He arrived in early 1942. Magnus' number is a standard number, however, without the A of the 1944 arrivals, or the Z of the Roma, or the other special classification symbols. Of course the penciller didn't know these details. So a standard Auschwitz number, which is too big, but it doesn't tell us anything.

4) Vision and the Scarlet Witch, Vol. 1, #4. Magneto has just found out Wanda and Pietro are his children. (This is from Feb. 1983). He is on the moon, in the Inhuman city of Attilan, telling VIsion about his youth. "I was born into a time and place ... Android ... where both man and mutant were persecuted for being ... different." Picture of the Auschwitz camp, guards tormenting emaciated prisoners, one of whom displays a very prominent and exaggerated Star of David on his clothing. Remember Jews and Roma were kept apart in the camp. In the next panel, however, Magneto sort-of goes into a fantasy. He says, "But unlike the other victims, I possessed the power to fight back." He imagines he's hurling Nazi tanks away with magnetic energy. What's this? In 1983, the reader doesn't know what to make of this. Keep in mind, he's meeting with Wanda, Pietro, Vision, and Crystal, and has held Luna for the first time. Is he exaggerating? Showing off for them?

(5) Now for the second most important comic proving Magneto is Jewish, Uncanny #199, Nov. 1985. Magneto with Lee Forrester and Kitty Pryde arrive at the National Holocaust Memorial in Washington, DC. (It's not really Lee, but Mystique, trying to capture Magneto). Magneto has been having an affair with Lee, he loves her. He brings her to the Holocaust Memorial? Why? Fun date, huh? Why, because he has no other family. These people are his family. Jewish survivors of the Holocaust. (The Roma have their own name for the genocide, and their own gatherings, with their own rituals and customs. Magneto has no reason to go to a Jewish gathering if he isn't Jewish). Lee/Mystique says: "Man's inhumanity to man ... how easily the race kills." Magneto answers: "Then, Lee, it was the Jews. My nightmare has ever been that tomorrow it will be Mutants." Why would he say that, why wouldn't he mention another ethnic group, if he weren't Jewish? Next, Magneto tells Kitty EXACTLY how to address the gathering in order to get information about dead or missing family members. How does Magneto know how to do this? Isn't it obvious that he's done this before? Why would he address a Jewish Holocaust gathering looking for information about his family if his family weren't Jewish? (And it is a Jewish gathering, besides the use of the word Holocaust, a speaker says in the background: "... the systematic institutionalized extermination of one people by another."). Kitty asks about her great-aunt Chava, who died at Auschwitz, and Magneto is recognized by two survivors, Ruth and David Shulman, two Jewish survivors. (Shul is another name for synagogue -- Shulman means man of the temple, or man of the synagogue). They remember Magneto as a youth in Auschwitz, and say he helped them survive. And witness him as having been there. (No implanted memories, please). They testify that he " ... Had been at that accursed place from the very start..."

Later, Mystique reveals herself, and arrests Magneto in front of all these people. Magneto says that he recognizes no authority. "My land ...all the countries of the world ... turned their back on me and mine when we were condemned to Hitler's death camps. Therefore, in return, I have sworn to deny them." So let's clear this up ... the Roma were not persecuted in Greece, the Greek Jewish community was decimated. A small number of Roma and Jews in Rumania were exiled to a new border country called "Transnistria" but the remainder of the Roma were left alone. Several hundred thousand of them. 350,000 Rumanian Jews were savagely murdered throughout the country. In Slovakia, the Roma were left alone, the Slovakian Jews were among the first sent to Auschwitz. After the Slovakian uprising was crushed in 1944, several hundred Roma who had courageously helped in the rebellion were murdered, along with the remainder of the Jews of Slovakia. Bulgaria did not persecute its Romani people. Bulgaria, although resisting deportations of its Jews, persecuted them locally. In the Netherlands, only the "wandering" Roma who were captured in camps and wagons were deported, about 500. The remaining who had bought homes or found shelter with neighbors, were left alone. The Netherlands is where Gabrielle Haller comes from -- in under two years 100,000 Dutch Jews were deported, most were killed. I could go on. There is no other people who were hunted everywhere the Nazis went or had influence but the Jews. There is no other people who had the gates of escape cut off after the war started, but the European Jews. Magneto's reasoning is based on this most extreme situation.

(6) Uncanny #211, Nov. 1986. The Mutant Massacre. Page 9 -- Betsy Braddock has just come in from discovering what happened to a wounded Morlock, who has just died. Magneto, Storm, and Wolverine are standing there in Xavier's infirmary. Betsy says, "... I saw a cadre of super-beings ... massacring every living thing in the Morlock tunnels." Magneto reacts immediately, out of pure emotion. "NO! The horrors of my childhood, born again...only this time, Mutants are the victims, instead of Jews." What else does this mean? He's talking about HIS childhood, he's making a parallel. If he weren't Jewish, he wouldn't have said Jews, he would have said Roma. The two groups of people are not interchangeable.

(7) New Mutants #49, March 1987. Magneto is dreaming. It is an entire page representation of the massacre of his family. Here we see for the first time, his family -- father, mother, sister -- as they were gunned down in front of open graves. The family members are dressed in middle class urban clothes. No peasant dress, no Roma clothing. (And it is not a cliche. Roma women always wore, at this time, their flowing skirts and distinctive scarves and clothing, similar to the Bosnian women of today). Being massacred with Magnus' family is a mixed group of people. Men in bowler hats and suits, one old woman in a long skirt. One man in a bowler hat has the side-locks of the devout Jew, but the other people could be anyone. Poles or Jews or Roma. It's Magnus and his family who are out of place. They are well-dressed, Magnus's sister in a proper school uniform with the prim collar. Every picture I've seen of the German Rom show: a people of color, having left India and Armenia five- to six-hundred years ago, the men wearing Fedoras (favorite style of hat) and normal suits and ties, and the women and girls always dressed in the long skirts and distinctive flowered scarves. The boys wear a mixture of urban short pants but scarf belts, some have socks, some don't. New Mutants #49, page 17, could show some Roma in the crowd, but Magnus' family members are definitely not Romani in this picture.

(8) X-Men Classics #12, back-up story, Aug. 1987. The actual scenes of Magneto's escape from Auschwitz. "And with World War II ending... the Third Reich defeated...it's guards wanted no witnesses left...to tell the tale of this horror..." Picture of an SS soldier about to shoot a fallen and stricken Madga. "He had been there from the start ..." Magnus has just slammed a wooden beam into the head of the SS soldier. "Grown to manhood within its electrified barbed wire fence. If he was to die, it would not be in this abattoir ... and not without a fight!" Magnus grabs a terrified Magda by the hand and drags her with him in his escape. (a) The war is almost over, it is winter, it is the winter of 1944-1945. The Roma were gone by 1945. All the Roma women were gone. Only 4 clerks, high-status friends of Nazi officials in Camp I, were left. The Romani camp was murdered in the gas chambers in August 1944. (b) This scene, by Claremont and Bolton, is completely accurate. It takes place on Jan. 20, 1945, two days after thecamp was evacuated and the Death marches began. Some 70 of the Sonderkommando were kept to help destroy the evidence of the death factory, before they were to be killed. Some 200 women from the woman's camp, Jews, were chosen to fill in the huge pits where bodies were burned. They had to haul ashes, break up human bones, all in the coldest part of winter. The SS soldiers sent back on Jan. 20th were sent to kill the women. That is exactly what you see in this comic book, because Claremont and Bolton took the time and cared enough, to do their research. Magneto was saving Magda becasue at that point, he wasn't the target, yet. If they were out by the burial pits to the northwest of the camp, that is a point close to the forest. It just makes sense.

(9) New Mutants #61, March 1988. On page 22, Magneto is alone, kneeling over the dead body of Doug Ramsey, thinking thoughts only the reader can see. This is one moment he would not misrepresent anything, to himself especially. He says, "An ill wind is coming ... they are registering mutants ... like they once registered my people in Poland ...! Who knows what horrors await us." Only the Jews were registered, and forced to wear armbands with the Star of David on them, in Poland (at the end of 1939). Efforts to murder the Polska Roma (the Polish Roma) began in 1942, but they weren't registered first. Young Magnus wouldn't have known about any of that in any case-- he was already at Auschwitz by 1942. He would only have known that "my people" the Jewish people in Poland, including the German Jews who had already been deported there in the first months of the War, were registered.

(10) Classic X-Men #19, March 1988, back-up story. Magneto is apparently working for the CIA hunting Nazis. He is about to be betrayed by them, and his lady love of that time, Isabelle, is about to be murdered. But as he is apprehending a Nazi war criminal he gets one of his massive headaches. "Pain," he thinks, "again indescribable." "Worse than the bite of the kapo's whip. The murder of parents and family, the death of a child ... the loss of a beloved wife!" So here we see that Magneto was the victim of kapos. He could not have been a kapo. He was too young anyway, as we've seen. He grew up in Auschwitz. Here he says the murder of parents, and family. The parents separate, gunned down. The remainder of his family, no doubt sent to the gas chambers later, while he was in the Sonderkommando. Remember what he said in UX #150, his entire family wiped out. So as a Jew in the Sonderkommando he not only watched his family die, he helped kill them. How can any other comic book character ever come close to Magneto for dramatic intensity, but only if he is a Jew.

(11) X-Factor Annual #4, 1989. Doom challenges Magneto to a duel of wills, with a helmet that pulls out unpleasant memories and torments the wearer. Who will crack first? Magneto takes his turn -- Doom describes what he sees, "...after the ignoble defeat of the Nazis in Germany, you and the woman Magda you rescued, fled the prison camp Auschwitz, in Poland."

"Auschwitz, where your family had perished --living skeletons -- and you had grown to manhood amid horrors most men could not conceive." First, Doom confirms that Magnus and Magda "fled" or escaped Auschwitz before liberation and after the Roma camp was murdered. Then he describes some of Magneto's family perishing, as living skeletons, at Auschwitz. They could either have been kept as prisoners, or brought in, starving, from ghettoes in Poland and gassed. They could have been either Roma or Jews. But then it's Doom's turn to wear the helmet. Doom's Romani heritage is discussed at great length. Doom is proud to be a Rom, he knows he is a Rom. Why would he not acknowledge that Magneto is also a Rom? Why did he say your family, implying your people, to Magneto? Not "our" people?

(12) And now the most important evidence, and just about my favorite X-Men comic, Uncanny #274, from March 1991. In the Savage Land, the entire comic is told from the point of view of Magneto. It is a first person narrative, he is talking directly to us, the readers. He is not exaggerating, he is not showing off. The writing is elegant and wonderful ... "My life's ambition has been to safeguard my fellow mutants," Magneto says. "Zaladane has no such compunction. And I hear the echo of Der Fuhrer's voice in the radio of memory, smell the awful stench of the sick and dying as the cattle cars brought the comdemned to Auschwitz. I wear red, the color of blood, in tribute to their lost lives. And the harder I try to cast it aside, to find a gentler path ... the more irresistibly I'm drawn back. I should have died myself with those I loved. Instead, I carted the bodies by the hundreds, by the thousands ... from the death house to the crematorium ... and the ashes to the burial ground. Asking now what I could not then ... why was I spared?!" So there it is. He describes his job at Auschwitz. That is it. This is no vague job description, this is what the Sonderkommando did. This is fundamental to the history of the Holocaust, to the history of Nazi Germany. Making the Jews the ones who had to do all the dirty work in the death camps.

Marvel cannot say they have their own version of Holocaust history. What kind of reasoning is that? Where do the editors and writers of Marvel get off making up their own history of the Holocaust? Where do they draw the line? Has any reader out there ever seen any major publisher or entertainment outfit, outside Neo-Nazi groups and the Militias or Far Right Splinter groups, who just took it upon themselves to change a Jew into a Romany and change Holocaust and Auschwitz history to make it fit? Magneto says it here, he was a member of the Sonderkommando. He was not a kapo. He was not a Russian POW. He was a Jew! On page 14 of UXM #274, Magneto is dreaming again. He again sees his family being gunned down. He again feels what it was like to be buried alive. Rogue wakes him up.

(13) Uncanny X-Men #275, April 1991, which concludes the Savage Land story from UXM #274, referred to above, also contains confirmation as to what happened to young Magnus. Magneto says, directly to the reader, in diary-like narration, as he uses the last strength of his emaciated body to push away his captors, "They think me beaten, finished. A mistake many have made in the past. As I found the strength, as a boy, to survive being machine-gunned and buried alive, and later the unimaginable horror of Auschwitz ... so do I find it in me, here and now, to break free."

(14) X-Men Vol. 2, No. 2, Nov. 1991. The beginning of the end for Magneto. But on page 24 he says to Moira MacTaggart, who has seemingly betrayed him, and enraged him, "Of course not. You worked for the betterment of the world and the race. I heard those same rationales as a boy, in the Auschwitz Death Camp. From Dr. Joseph Mengele himself!" Mengele's first victims were the Roma, he liked the Roma. He brought the children candy and extra food. And in August of 1944, after trying unsuccessfully to save the Romani Family Camp (also for his own experimental purposes) Mengele obeyed his orders and vigorously hunted down and helped exterminate all remaining Roma. He then dissected those of most interest to him, and sent body parts to Berlin. Then he turned his attention to the Jews of Auschwitz. Only his Jewish victims have survived. His Romani victims, those transfered out of the camp in the spring and summer of 1944, have rarely come forward. If Magneto is alive in Auschwitz after the start of 1945, and he personally heard Dr. Mengele, he is a Jew.

Magneto is a Jew especially since Mengele would have been one of his supervisors in the Sonderkommando.

(15) X-Men, Vol. 2, No. 3, Dec. 1991 -- Magneto to Xavier, "You speak to the best in humanity. I have endured the worst. You imagine the reality of the Holocaust, of the Nazi Death Camps. I grew up in one." Magneto says The Holocaust. This is the translation of SHOAH, and was first used after the war, and popularized by Eli Wiesel. It means the Jewish Holocaust. One can say the Romani genocide, and today sometimes you'll hear the Romani holocaust, or the Russian holocaust, or the holocaust perpetrated against the mentally ill and the handicapped. (Nazi pre-meditated genocide was really only carried to the fullest extreme against three groups, the first were the mentally ill and the handicapped, who were the first victims of genocide. The second and third groups were the Jews and the Roma). But the Holocaust is what Jewish people say when they refer to the calculated campaign of Nazi Germany to kill every Jew in the world. (They actually made lists of every country in the Western world, and all the Jewish populations. They made no such list for any other people). Nazi Germany succeeded in killing almost 6 million of their foremost victims, until the Third Reich was defeated.

(16) X-Factor #92, July, 1993. Havok and X-Factor are battling Cortez and the Acolytes, in this opening chapter of Fatal Attractions. Cortez is ranting about the "flatscans" and how mutants have to subjugate them. Havok says, "Out to destroy the "inferior" race ... in Magneto's name? Don't you know what an insult that is to the memory of the very man you claim to worship? Fifty years ago, Magnus barely survived a Holocaust that destroyed almost all of his people: all because some lunatic took it upon himself to decide who deserved to live ... and who didn't. Where's the sense in resurrecting that kind of evil ... in the name of one of its victims?!" Cortez answers, "You've seen this place Havok! You've seen the sentinels! You tell me ... where's the sense in letting the flatscans do to the mutants what Hitler did to the Jews? ..." Cortez has done research on Magneto, he says the Jews, as a parallel metaphor. Why say that, if Magneto isn't Jewish?

(17) Then comes the infamous Unlimited #2. This is a long and involved FAQ I've got going here, so I won't go into detail at the moment. But the bottom line is, everything that Gabrielle Haller says about Magneto's history is false. I don't want to go line by line over it now. Everything! Danzig was not annexed. It was a Free City, under League of Nations protection, that voted itself a Nazi government and welcomed the Nazi troops in like liberators. Gauleiter Forster, the extremely anti-Semitic Nazi leader of Danzig ordered all 10,000 Jews of Danzig to be kicked out of the city in 1939, not the Roma. The Jews. Auschwitz wasn't opened as a Polish political prisoner camp until the summer of 1940, not 1939. The Roma were sent to German municipal camps, in Germany and the Greater Reich, as early as 1933. But they were not sent to Auschwitz from Germany until 1943. The only people who were in a work camp in Auschwitz before it opened were 300 Jews from the town of Auschwitz who were forced to transform a collection of horse stables and army barracks into the Polish prisoner camp. "Genocide, extermination ..." of Poles? No. The Polish people suffered terribly, and were considered "sub-human" by the Nazis. Millions of Polish citizens were killed throughout the course of the war, as soldiers, as slave laborers, as underground fighters, as members of the intelligentsia. But this was Nazi suppression of a conquered country, not planned genocide. Roma, Yes. The homosexuals, no. Not genocide. Persecution and imprisonment. Treated terribly. But people weren't sent to the gas chambers just because they were homosexuals. And "intellectuals" ? (How could Nicieza have written this?) Intellectuals were targets of genocide? Well, I hardly think so, since Goebbels, and Albert Speer, and even Mengele were considered intellectuals.

No one was sent to the gas chambers, or was shot in an open grave, or was tortured and murdered JUST because they happened to be an intellectual. Thousands of Polish citizens who were members of the intelligentsia (the educated class, the vanguard or elite of the educated class), were murdered in the first months of the war. But there was no planned campaign to hunt down every intellectual in Europe and exterminate them. The mentally ill and handicapped, the Jews, and the Roma were the primary targets of Nazi genocide. The Russians came next. Everything Haller says about Magneto in Unlimited #2 contradicts most of Magneto's history as presented in 15 years worth of comics.

(18) Until recently, when, in Road to Onslaught, Marvel once again published that outrageous Gabrielle Haller speech about Magneto like they were proud of it (??) the next references in the Age of Apocalypse comics portrayed Magneto once again as Jewish. In X-Men Vol. 2, No. 40, where David Haller, Legion, pulls Magneto's memories out, you see young Magnus with the men, standing behind and below a high, barred window. This is an accurate portrayal of the quarters of the Sonderkommando at Auschwitz I. At Auschwitz I, only the Sonderkommando (other than prisoners awaiting execution) were kept in isolated basement cells, the windows of which were high, barred, and as seen from the outside, half-below ground level.

And why is Magneto in Israel anyway? How could he have come there? Well, why would a Romany go to Israel when at least 30,000 Roma lived in Germany in the late 1960s and early 1970s? And many more Rom formed a thriving community in Paris. Why not just go home to his own clan and tribe? Roma have a complex system of extended familes, clans, and tribes. Why go to Israel to "find himself" or find his "soul"? A German Jew had no place to go but somewhere else. A Polish Jew definitely had no place to go back to, since some Polish fanatics continued to murder returning Holocaust survivors well into the late 1940s. Any Jew can emigrate to Israel, under the Law of Return. All Magneto had to do was show them the tattoo on his arm. And he was home. (And in case some of you were wondering, as some of us have discussed, with the exception of the Muslim Bosnians, only the Jews of Europe practiced circumcision. It was a religious rite, not a medical procedure. Only Jewish men and boys were circumcised among the prisoners at Auschwitz. The Nazis already knew what Magneto was. He was chosen for the Sonderkommando, he was Jewish. He was not pretending to be a Jew. He wasn't misidentified as a Jew. He was a circumcised, young Jewish man). Furthermore, Magnus at this time had forged papers, that identified him as "Erik Magnus Lehnsherr." He could have immigrated to any country in the world, including the United States! If he were Roma, and didn't want to self-identify as such, why not go to America? Why go to the one country that represents enormous pain for modern Roma -- i.e., the Rom today deeply resent the focus on Israel, and the support Israel enjoys among nations of the Western world, while the Roma continue to be persecuted and ignored.

(19) In Astonishing X-Men #3, formerly Uncanny, from May 1995, we have the most clear reference to Magneto's being Jewish, written by Scott Lobdell. Magneto has just hit Bishop, and is helping him to his feet. He says, "Long before Xavier died ... before this point of divergence ... I stood by helplessly as millions of my people were led to slaughter in the name of 'genetic purity." Now the AOA is not a what-if story. It is a divergent timeline. Magneto says, before the timeline diverged. What other people were lead by the millions, led to the slaughter, in the name of genetic purity? Many people suffered and died in World War II. 250,000 to 500,000 Roma were murdered. Millions of Russians and Poles during the course of the invasions, and in political violence, and in acts of pure murder, were exterminated. But only the European Jews were "led to the slaughter" in the millions because of one man's racial beliefs. Only the Jews of Europe Persecutionand incarceration are not the same as genocide and extermination.

20) X-Men #72, cover date February 1998, published in mid-December 1997. This comic book makes a significant contribution to Magneto's history. Basically, the book reveals that the name *Erik Lehnsherr* which was revealed by Gabrielle Haller in Unlimited #2 to be Magneto's real name, is fake, and so Haller's assertion that Magneto is a *Sinte* Rom was based on false and forged identity papers.

The scenario begins with Gabrielle Haller, lying on her bed, working on a lap- top computer, writing the American Sen. Kelly, begging him to help find and secure the release of Charles Xavier. Sabra, the Israeli super-hero, a mutant and Mossad agent, suddenly appears floating in the air outside Haller's balcony doors. Haller has just pushed open the doors, saying, "You're too important to lose, Charles. I will see you ... FREE?" And Sabra says, "Sometimes, Ambassador Haller ... freedom, like the truth, is little more than an illusion. Don't you think?"

Sabra has come to Haller with information. She says to Gabrielle Haller: "I"m sure you recall shocking the world when you announced that you had UNDENIABLE proof ofMagneto's identity as Erik Lehnsherr. The undeniable has just been DENIED." Sabra then goes on to show Haller, and the readers, the file on a master forger named George Odekirk. In this file, apparently, is a computer analysis of the identity papers of Erik Lehnsherr, which shows that Odekirk forged those documents. Haller says, "He created Erik Lehnsherr? If this is true ... you must take me to him! He could be our only link to Magneto's true identity ... our last chance to stop him once and for all!"

But just as Sabra is flying Haller to the Transylvanian Alps, to meet with Odekirk, the scene switches to Odekirk, who is working on another forged passport, sitting in bed while his wife sleeps beside him. Suddenly, Odekirk looks up -- he has a visitor. It's Magneto, in full costume.

Magneto is floating in the air. He surrounds Odekirk's bed with his magnetic energy, and uses his power to keep Odekirk's wife unconscious. He says, "You failed me." Odekirk responds, "Please ... please, my wife ..." Magneto answers, "She will sleep the sleep of the innocent. She has done nothing ... but you ... YOU, my friend, have BETRAYED me." Odekirk protests his innocence, and then Magneto makes this remarkable speech: "Do you remember what you promised me the night I came to you, torn and filthy, nearly a quarter century ago? I was searching for my beloved MAGDA, determined not to lose her as I had lost so many others in the fire that engulfed all of Europe during my childhood. The authorities were in pursuit of me for the "crime" of avenging my daughter's murder. I was willing to deny who I was ... everything that my family died for ... so that I could find one woman ... so that I would not be caged AGAIN. The Erik Lehnsherr fabrication was a convenient means of ensuring that. You swore that the forged papers were FLAWLESS, that your skills were unsurpassed... but now, you have proven to be a liability. Your work has been called into queston by my enemies, and they will trace Erik Lehnsherr the Sinte BACK to you." Odekirk protests, "That is impossible! That forgery was impeccable! My work is ... " Magneto answers: "It was not ENOUGH! You gave birth to Erik Lehnsherr, Odekirk. And tonight, you have killed him. My secrets shall die with him. All that remains now ... is MAGNUS."

This scene says, subtly but clearly, that Magnus denied who he was, gave up everything his famly died for, to take the false identity of a Sinte Rom named Erik Lehnsherr. Since this entire FAQ has gone into great detail showing exactly how and why Magnus was born Jewish, it seems there is no doubt now, that Magneto's family and he himself, were Jews. Magnus would not say he denied *everything* his family died for, by taking a Romani identity, if his family were indeed Roma. As I pointed out above, only the Jews and Roms were targeted as entire peoples, and killed for no reason other than they were Jews and Roms. Magnus was either one, or the other. Since in XM #72, it is revealed that he is NOT a Rom, we must conclude he was born a Jew.

There are several continuity problems that arise from the revelations of XM #72. Several unanswered questions:

1) How much of Haller's speech (Unlimited #2) was based information contained in Odekirk's forgery, how much was based on what she personally knew, and how much did she "fabricate" herself? She makes a large number of mistakes, about nearly every aspect of Magneto's history and life. She also gets her Holocaust history and dates wrong. Did she perhaps add her own *facts* to what she found in those old identity papers? Was she perhaps trying to make the story coherent? As in, trying to make what she knew about Magnus and his history fit what she learned about *Erik Lehnsherr*? For example, where she says, on page 19 of Unlimited #2, "...Lehnsherr had taken to calling himself MAGNUS ... as if by choosing his MIDDLE name, he could bring some semblance of BALANCE and SIMPLICITY to his haunted life." This is Haller's supposition -- the reason he was calling himself MAGNUS in Israel. She knew him as Magnus back then, she had just found out, his full name was supposedly *Erik Lehnsherr.* Did she try to splice together the information?

2) While XM #72 makes it clear why Magnus cloaked himself in this false identity and ethnic background initially, what is not so understandable is why he continued to maintain that false identity after his search for Magda was over, and he immigrated to Israel. Did he use the forged *Erik Lehnsherr* passport to enter Israel? Why would he use a false identity and ethnic background to enter Israel, when he was a Jew?

3) Why would Magnus continue to use the Erik Lehnsherr identity during the Age of Apocalypse, especially since he publicly identified with being a Jew? (Astonishing X-Men #3, quoted above.)

4) Magnus worked for at least one intelligence agency, most likely the CIA (Classic X-Men #19). He then hunted dangerous mutants, for his own mysterious purposes, as shown in a brief cameo in Generation X #10 -- which was a memory belonging to Sean Cassidy, telepathically accessed by Emma Frost. During the time he was working for the CIA, his code-name was Magneto. In Classic X-Men #19, he is called only Magneto. In Generaton X #10, Interpol agent Sean Cassidy doesn't know who the man is who is helping him track down Arcady (the future Omega Red). Emma Frost, commenting from the present as a psionic guide to Cassidy's memories, calls the man *Erik Lehnsherr.* But the question is, after he left Israel, did Magnus use the false identity Erik Lehnsherr?

5) During the time that Magneto tried to follow Xavier's path, roughly from UXM #196 through UXM #253, and New Mutants issues #35 through #75, including UXM #188, NM #21, #23, #24, #26, #28, and #29, he referred to himself as Magnus, and others like Storm and Kitty Pryde called him Magnus. Even though he was disguised as Michael Xavier for the outside world, the X-Men and their associates all knew Magneto as Magnus. During this time, Magnus also identified strongly with his Jewish and Jewish Holocaust history. The question now is, what happened to the *Erik Lehnsherr the SInte* identity during this time?

6) Why, now, after so many years, did Magneto find it necessary to kill George Odekirk in order to protect his identity? We know why he took the false name and ethnic background to begin with. But we have no evidence that he continued to use *Erik Lehnhserr*, during each stage of his pre-Magneto career. After he became Magneto, after all the battles with the X-Men, after the events of Fatal Attractions, after the mind-wipe and the appearance of Joseph, after Onslaught, why would Magnus be so concerned with protecting his true identity? Was he trying to protect the memory of his family? Has he maintained contact with pre-Holocaust family grave sites, or places where he once lived? Is he worried that the very bones of his ancestors might be violated by those looking for his genetic material? Then there's Anya, his beloved daughter -- she was never Anya *Lehnsherr*. Her last name is now unknown -- is Magneto trying to protect something concerning her? George Odekirk wouldn't be the only witness to Magneto's true identity, either. What about those Carpathian villagers, who accepted Auschwitz escapees Magnus and Magda in 1945? Did anyone in Vinnitsa who knew Magnus' true last name survive his burst of electromagnetic radiation? What about Ruth and David Shulman, who knew him at Auschwitz, and recognized him, in UXM #199?

These, and other unanswered questions, remain.

By removing the *Erik Lehnsherr the Sinte* identity, fixing that particular retcon from Unlimited #2, and leaving the rest of Magneto's history intact, writer Joe Kelly and editor Bob Harras have not officially stated that Magneto was born Jewish, and was a Jewish survivor of Auschwitz. But, as was the case during the years Chris Claremont wrote the character, the references to Magneto's Jewish identity are there, subtle and at the same time, obvious.

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Buster & Rio

Buster: Typical that I come back to an empty house without you Rio: What a depressing waste, like Rio: Could always throw your own welcome back party Buster: Tempting Buster: The lads have been harassing me for weeks, like Rio: Aww Rio: put 'em out of their misery Buster: Fuck it Buster: Might as well start as I mean to go on, yeah? Rio: Exactly Rio: Gotta keep busy somehow babe Buster: What are you doing? Rio: What I'm always doing Rio: 🤑 Buster: Working or working though? Rio: Ha, uncrackable code that Rio: Working, now going to the flat Rio: Lord knows no one knocks in this gaff Buster: At least with me gone that's the worst you'd have to explain if someone burst in Buster: So you're welcome Rio: True 😂 Rio: ✋ for dodging that bullet Buster: I'd take the mercy kill Buster: There'd be no more need to sneak around then Rio: Hmm Rio: 'til you realise we're exiled from dubo and london Rio: then where'd we go? Buster: Somewhere else Buster: Somewhere with some sun for a start, like Rio: Wouldn't hate that Buster: Exactly Buster: The weather's shit here right now Rio: Just in case you didn't know summer's over, like Buster: Doesn't mean I have to be happy about it Rio: Don't pout, baby Rio: ruin your back to school photo Buster: You've got loads of time to cheer me up before that Rio: Do my best Buster: I'll do my best to make you miss me Buster: Be easy then Rio: You know I already do Buster: Yeah but I want you to miss me as bad as I miss you Rio: How do you know I don't already? Buster: You wouldn't be able to concentrate if you did Rio: I dunno Rio: Can make it work for me with what I've gotta do Buster: You gonna make me spend to see it? Rio: Things haven't changed that much Rio: How rude Rio: You got a party to organise though, and friends to give much needed attention 😏 Buster: Just gonna make me beg then, yeah? Buster: Rude Rio: You still have to put some work in, boy Buster: I knew you weren't worked up enough, babe Rio: 😇 me Buster: Things haven't changed that much Buster: Your words Rio: Caught me Buster: You wish I could Buster: You wanna be in these arms so bad Rio: 😖 Why you teasing me Buster: You gotta get that 💰💰💰 Buster: I'm helping Rio: So helpful, you Rio: 😒 Buster: I can always change tact Buster: What would be more helpful to you, baby? Rio: Be here or stop being so cute Buster: [Sends selfie] Buster: Does that help? Rio: Ugh 😍 Rio: I miss you Buster: I love you Rio: I love you too Rio: Hold up Buster: Changed your mind or what? Rio: [Away for a long ass time cos fuck you Drew] Buster: Babe? Rio: My bad Rio: Unexpected visitor and progress Buster: Indie's back Buster: Well that's good Rio: Not yet but it's getting sorted Buster: Alright Buster: Who was there then? Rio: Drew came 'round, he didn't know I'd be here obvs, just doing some work himself Rio: but he actually apologised for the other night Rio: and he's gonna talk to Indie Buster: Seriously? Rio: I know, right? Rio: Unexpected Rio: but thank god, so over this drama Buster: Yeah Buster: Thank Christ I don't have to worry about that cunt now Rio: He was really decent considering Rio: got rid of whoever he was with before they could get an eyeful too 😶😰 Buster: Good Buster: And you're okay, yeah? Rio: Yeah, I'm fine Rio: I hope Indie comes back Buster: Like with everything he said and did Buster: You're not just saying it 'cause you want Indie back Rio: No, no Rio: Promise Rio: He was really nice Buster: Thank fuck Rio: Seriously Rio: Had forgot he had a key Buster: Me too Rio: 😂 Had to tell the stream I wasn't about to be murdered/doing some kinky roleplay for 'em Buster: Fucking hell Rio: Stepping it up some to keep the edge on my competitors Buster: 😂 Buster: You've got my heart going for all the wrong reasons, babe Rio: Soz, baby Buster: I'm just glad you didn't get murdered, like Rio: Cheers Rio: That's how you know the honeymoon is over 😏 Buster: Don't Buster: I ain't marrying you even if you threaten to murder me Rio: 😂 Rio: so gutted Buster: Get your own fortune, cheers Rio: Who's out here getting fake murdered for the coin, huh? 🤔🤔🤔 Rio: Always doing the most and getting the most Buster: Give it a few days and you'll have plenty of competition Buster: I'm already doing assigned reading whilst planning a party here Rio: 🤓 Buster: Shut up Buster: I gotta do it sometime Rio: Only joking Rio: It's hot Buster: [sends selfie of him reading] Buster: I know Rio: Don't ruin my fantasy, dork Buster: Well now you're not gonna get the rest of the pics Rio: Babe Rio: 😞 Buster: Keep your fantasy Buster: 😏 Buster: That's what you wanted, yeah? Rio: No Rio: I want you Buster: [sends some more pics but not the good stuff] Rio: Fuckin' tease Buster: learnt from the best Buster: you're the biggest tease ever Rio: Glad I've taught you so much, like Rio: don't be using it against me though, ain't ready to come for the master yet 😜 Buster: 😂 Buster: Am I not? Rio: 🤫 Rio: If you're gonna try then get prepared for me to go harder, like Rio: not gonna hold back 'cos you're an amateur, baby Buster: I leave the country and suddenly you're feeling brave enough to call me an amateur Rio: What you gonna do about it? Rio: 😋 Buster: Get on a flight to sort you out Rio: I wish Rio: Seriously...I really fucking want you right now, my body misses you so much already Buster: I ain't opposed to leaving my party before it even starts Buster: It's not like I need the distraction if I've got you Buster: And you know how you've got me too, 'cause it's the same as always Buster: There's too many walls in this house I could push you up against and I really fucking want to Rio: Oh God Rio: no, we gotta be good Rio: can't break this soon Buster: I don't wanna be good Buster: Tell me I have to Rio: You've gotta Rio: You've put it out there now, the keener guests will be on their way already, like Buster: Yeah Buster: Fuck's sake Rio: You'll have fun Buster: 'Course Buster: I just want you here too Rio: Obviously Rio: I know I am the party but Rio: gotta be places, babe Buster: With jokes like that, yeah Buster: You gonna go see Indie? Rio: Should let her come to me, I reckon Rio: make sure Drew has sorted it Rio: Imma go out with some friends, see who's about Buster: You're right, could be more bullshit from him Rio: I don't see why Rio: he's trying to make good, finally Buster: I don't reckon it is, I'm just saying Rio: Yeah Rio: Anyway Rio: party time for all Buster: Do you know where you're gonna go yet? Rio: Me and Rian are starting at Hang Dai 👌 Rio: s'good craic Buster: I'll warn them you're coming, like Rio: 🖕 Buster: You all out of politeness now I've left? Rio: Nah, so well-behaved in fact that your 'joke' cut me real deep Buster: Poor baby Rio: 😒 Gonna drown my sorrows Buster: I'd tell you not to go too hard but I ain't gonna be that hypocrite Rio: S'alright, soak it up with the Chinese Rio: No one to impress tonight Buster: I'm still gonna be able to see your posts, remember Buster: Impress me Rio: Boy, I know my angles Rio: and I know what you like Buster: If you don't by now you really do need to drown your sorrows Rio: Psh Rio: can't even try and come at me with that Rio: and my mates need know excuse to be coming with those 'rounds Buster: 😂 Buster: Literally the only thing our friends have in common Rio: Real talk 😂 Rio: Tell 'em I said hi Buster: I ain't saying shit to James from you though Rio: Oh no Rio: what a shame Buster: For him yeah Rio: Bless him Buster: He's a prick Buster: Save your blessings Rio: Why hang with him then Buster: If I hold him to it I'd have to do it with all of 'em Rio: Fair enough Rio: a lot of effort Buster: Yeah Buster: Not trying to waste my time with that Rio: Understandable Rio: they at least have their uses this way, yeah Buster: Exactly Rio: Hmm Rio: What am I gonna wear Buster: Are you sticking with the 'nobody to impress' bullshit or not? Rio: Wasn't planning to rock up in my sweats regardless babe Rio: boys that aren't you are friggin' useless, how can I work out the vibe and match from 'idk some jeans' Buster: Don't be trying to match Buster: Make your own vibe Rio: Solid advice cutie Buster: More importantly, what am I gonna wear, though Rio: Forreal Rio: gotta show 'em what they've been missing baby Buster: Easy Buster: If they ain't impressed they ain't coming in Rio: 😂 Rio: One way to keep the guest list down 😉 Buster: Well, yeah I can't trash the place day 1 Rio: not with that attitude Buster: I'm not in the 24 now, babe Rio: Exactly Rio: step your game up, before you'd just tell me the maid would clean it up to piss me off Buster: She doesn't come every day we're not royalty Buster: Just act like it Rio: Don't party like it Rio: don't need to see you in a nazi uniform or with your pasty arse out thanks Buster: 😂 Buster: [Sends booty selfie because he's silly] Buster: I was gonna throw outfit suggestions at you but you've sorted it Buster: Cheers Rio: 😏 Rio: well, the SS uniforms were Hugo Boss so Rio: right up your alley that Buster: Shut up Rio: 😂 Rio: I love you Buster: I miss you Rio: Yeah Rio: it's shit Buster: At least school will distract me Buster: Never thought I'd be saying that, like Rio: Gonna ace it Buster: Standard Rio: Yeah Rio: you work hard too though Buster: It's the one thing my parents reckon that isn't bullshit Buster: Gotta work hard as well as play it Rio: Amen Rio: I'll second that Buster: Cheers Buster: It's what none of the lads can get their heads around Buster: It can't be a game all the time, fuck that Rio: Unless they planning to live off their Ma and Pa forever Rio: tragic Rio: assumedly they'll get handed a cushy job by said Pa though so won't even see the consequences of 🙄 Buster: Yeah Buster: And a missus with her own set of rich parents is pretty likely Rio: S'who you know Rio: won the genetic lottery, like, well done yous Buster: 🥇 Rio: You ain't fooling anyone, babe Rio: know me for starters Buster: I don't need to fool anyone Buster: It ain't no trick I'm actually this good Rio: 😏 S'one word for it Buster: What's your word then? Enlighten me Rio: You know my word Rio: 'cos you hate it Rio: cute Buster: Maybe I miss it Buster: Or just love you enough to put up with hearing it again Rio: I'll call you later, no doubt when I'm fucked up and you can hear all about it Buster: Yeah? Buster: Good Rio: Let you miss me a bit first Rio: 'Course Buster: I already do Buster: A lot Rio: [sends highlights from stream earlier] Rio: how much i miss you Buster: Jesus Buster: If it's any consolation I spent so long in the shower missing you earlier that it's a good thing my parents aren't struggling to pay any bills Rio: I know, imagine how good it could've been if I weren't interrupted, but that's the story of our lives init Rio: that is not what I'd call consolation Rio: damn Rio: over here needing a cold one now Buster: You won't be wanting the footage then. I'll save it for another day Rio: BUSTER Buster: Yeah? Rio: Please Buster: [Sends video because tell me everything ain't waterproof in the future like bitch my phone already is now] Rio: 😻 Rio: I'm literally drooling you're so fucking hot Rio: like gimme Buster: That's just what happens when I think about you Buster: You're so fucking hot and I want you so badly Rio: Fuck Rio: when can I come see you daddy? Buster: Now Buster: But seriously, I need you here soon Rio: Next weekend maybe Buster: I'll make it work if you can Rio: 'Course Rio: not that long of a flight, even if I have a Saturday shift Rio: I need you Buster: I love you Rio: I love you Rio: Go get ready Buster: You too Buster: We can do this Rio: 'Course Rio: 👑 Buster: You know it

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