#follow up to no. 20 You'll Regret Touching Him
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Scar
A follow-up to day twenty's "You Will Regret Touching Him" which you can read here as a refresher
Erin sits in the ambo next to her bleeding boyfriend.
They’d had to cut three spikes off the collar, bandaging them in place in Jay’s neck.
Even so, they’re still fighting to stem the flow of blood running down to soak into the front of his shirt.
He’s still conscious, squeezing back in response to her tight grip on his hand, his eyes roving across the ceiling of the ambulance.
Blocks and a strap across his forehead have been utilized to keep him from moving his head. Erin is leaned forward, as much as she can without getting in the paramedic’s way, to stay in his field of vision.
The monitors start beeping and she turns to look at the paramedic.
“What’s wrong?”
“He’s not getting enough oxygen.” Reyna says. “One of the spikes must have damaged his trachea.”
At Jay’s frightened whimper, Erin leans forward.
“Help him.” she begs.
“I am.” Reyna says. “But I can’t intubate him. The spikes will rip the tube to shreds.”
“But what else can you do?” Erin asks.
“Bypass the spikes.” Reyna says, opening a kit. “Jay? I’m going to inject some lidocaine to numb your neck.”
Jay’s eyes widen.
“It’s going to be okay.” Erin tells him. “Reyna will take care of you. Just hang in there.”
He shakes his head. The movement is limited by the blocks but Erin still squeezes his hand.
“Babe, it’s okay. Just try not to move your head.”
His mouth starts moving, arms coming up to push them away. Blood bubbles up around the center spike.
“Easy Jay.” Erin says, pinning his right arm. “You need to stay still.”
He just keeps struggling, getting more and more agitated. Erin keeps trying to hold him down but it’s getting harder.
And then suddenly he goes still.
He loses consciousness as his oxygen levels drop below ninety percent and Reyna dives in, cleansing his neck with iodine.
Erin’s stomach twists as the scalpel bites into flesh just below his Adam’s apple. Reyna digs her fingers in, spreading the muscle before she slides the tubing into place.
She connects an ambo bag to the end, nodding to Erin.
“I need you to give this a gentle squeeze when I tell you to.”
Erin takes hold of the bag, waiting while Reyna adjusts her stethoscope.
“Go.”
Erin squeezes. Reyna listens, adjusts the tube.
“Go again.”
“Alright we’re in. Go ahead and disconnect the bag. He can breathe on his own now that there’s a clear path.”
Erin nods, sitting back. Reyna packs gauze around the tube to secure it’s position and then starts fastening restraints on the sides of the stretcher.
“What are you doing?” Erin asks.
“He’s going to come to any minute now as his oxygen levels come up.” Reyna says. “And there’s a good chance he’ll be just as agitated if not more so.”
“So restraints?” Erin says.
“I can’t afford to have him rip out the tube.” Reyna says, securing Jay’s left wrist. “I’m sorry.”
He comes to as she’s fastening the other strap, blinking in confusion and immediately trying to move his head.
His heart rate spikes and he tries to move his hands, panicking further when he can’t.
“It’s okay, Jay.” Erin tries to soothe, rubbing is shoulder with her free hand. “You’re okay.”
He keeps struggling, mouth moving but only producing unintelligible sounds of protest.
“Jay, you need to calm down.” Erin begs. “You’re going to hurt yourself.”
Already his struggles have increased the bleeding from his neck.
“Can you sedate him?” Erin asks.
Reyna nods and pushes the medication into his IV line. His movements slow but his hands are still moving, fingers twitching.
Erin takes his hand again, holding tight.
“I’m here, Jay.” she promises. “I’m here and I know you’re scared but it’s going to be okay.”
His eyes are still open, still filled with fear. But what she doesn’t see is presence, awareness of the situation.
He’s having a flashback.
The ambulance screeches to a halt and then the back doors are being flung open. Erin watches as Jay is pulled away from her and swallowed by a sea of doctors.
She climbs out of the ambulance once they’ve cleared. Will is standing there.
“What happened?” he asks.
“The bastard put a spike collar on him.” she offers. “Some of the spikes broke the skin. One of them caused some damage to his trachea. Reyna had to do a …”
“A tracheotomy?” he asks when she trails off. “Oh god.”
“He was having a flashback.” she says. “He was scared before but when she started getting ready to do the procedure he… he panicked completely.”
“I’m not surprised.” he says. “I don’t… he won’t talk about it. But I recognized the scar. There was a lot going on at mom’s funeral. I didn’t see it at first and then when I did, well, he already didn’t want to talk to me. Asking about something like that didn’t exactly change anything.”
“So Afghanistan?” Erin asks.
“Most likely.” Will confirms. “And we don’t know anything else about the circumstances.”
“Maybe he’ll be more willing to talk now.” she says. “At least he’s alive. We can worry about the rest later.”
Will nods.
His neck hurts.
Everything else feels okay so why does his neck hurt so badly?
The sounds, the smells; everything tells him that he’s in the hospital so why can’t he remember what happened?
“Jay?”
Erin is here. Probably waiting for him to wake up.
“Jay, if you can hear me can you squeeze my hand?”
He directs his attention to his hands, finding something warm curled around his right hand.
He squeezes the hand.
“Thank goodness.”
“Jay. Can you open your eyes?”
Oh good. Will’s here too.
“Jay?”
Impatient much?
He pries his eyes open, blinking hard and looking around.
“Try not to move too much, Jay.” his brother cautions. “You could still pop stitches really easily.”
“W-”
Even the attempt at talking hurts too much and he immediately falls silent, eyes closing.
“Easy.” Will soothes. “Don’t try to talk either. Your neck is in bad shape.”
He knows that. What he doesn’t know is what happened.
“You were kidnapped by the asshole that was shooting cops.” Erin fills in, seeming to know what he needs.
Right. He remembers being strapped down, unable to move. Remembers something sharp pressing against his neck.
Remembers… the tracheotomy.
No, no, no, no, no.
He tries to reach for his throat, to feel for the tube that had been inserted. But his hands are pinned at his sides.
“Try to stay calm.” Will says, leaning over him. “We were able to remove the tracheotomy tube. It’s been replaced with an endotracheal tube which will be removed in a day or two once your throat has has a chance to heal.”
It’s gone? He stops fighting, searching his brother’s eyes for the truth of his words.
“You’re going to be fine.” Will says. “And maybe when you feel better we can talk about it, talk about the memories this brought up.”
Jay blinks slowly, a single tear streaking down his face.
He doesn’t want to talk about it. Doesn’t want to return to that medevac, two men holding him down while the third had cut into his skin.
The medic had been out of lidocaine. It had been a bad couple of days with a lot of fellow soldiers injured in a series of violent attacks and supplies had been running low across the board.
He can still remember the feeling of the tube sliding through the muscle of his throat, the way it had burned, the way it had pulled and dragged.
Remembers choking and gagging, blood dribbling down his chin.
Remembers the eternal, terrifying moments when he’d been unable to breathe, frantically trying to suck in a breath and coming up empty.
Remembers being sure that this was it. That this was how he was going to die.
“Jay?”
He’s shaken out of the memories as his brother calls his name.
He blinks, trying to focus himself in the present and finding his brother’s face.
“It’s okay.” Will says gently. “We don’t have to talk if you aren’t ready. Just know that I’m here for you, okay, whether you want to talk or not, I’m here.”
Jay nods minutely, squeezing his brother’s hand.
He’s home in Chicago where there will never be a shortage of lidocaine.
And the trauma of having his throat cut into ago is done and over with for now.
All that’s left is to rest and heal.
And maybe when he can talk again he’ll take Will up on his offer.
#whumptober 2023#no. 27#scar#Chicago PD#fic#follow up to no. 20 You'll Regret Touching Him#Jay Halstead
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Strawberry's Whumptober masterlist!
warning!! some of these post will contain gore, death, mental distress and other themes that may be disturbing to some readers! Please pay attention to they tags on each post and read with caution!
note: These will be 'x reader' posts because as this is an 'x reader' blog. Most if not all characters will be genshin characters simply because I know them better. If you have a character you want with a certain prompt, feel free to request it and I will write it when I get to it
if I am late some days please rest assured the fics will be uploaded eventually!
PRONOUNS: majority of my works will have no pronouns or gendered terms used for reader, if they are used they will be gender neutral or they/them. If you'd prefer she/her or he/him, there will be a link on the gn fics for both other options. If there is a specific set of pronouns you want me to use, i can edit upload another version with those pronouns, just let me know<3
Update (17th of Oct): whumptober is being put in hold temporarily, some things are going on and I can't really write atm. Everything will eventually be written by the end of October! Just a little delayed is all. Please be patient<3
Day 1: "how many fingers am I holding up?" with Albedo from Genshin impact [Here!]
Day 2: "They don't care about you" with Alhaitham from Genshin impact [Here!]
Day 3: "Make it stop" with Xiao from Genshin impact [Here!]
Day 4: "I see the danger, it's written there in your eyes" with Beidou from Genshin impact [Here!]
Day 5: Debris with Wanderer from Genshin impact [Here!]
Day 6: Made to watch with Kaveh from Genshin impact [Here!]
Day 7: "Can you hear me?" with Kokomi from Genshin impacy [Here!]
Day 8: "It's all for nothing" with Abyss!Aether from Genshin impact [Here!]
Day 9: "You're a liar" with Brother!Kaeya (and brother!Diluc) from Genshin impact [Here!]
Day 10: "You said you'd never leave" with brother!Bennet from Genshin impact [Here!]
Day 11: "No one will find you" with Cyno from Genshin impact [Here!]
Day 12: "I haven't slept in days, but who's counting?" with Freminet from Genshin impact [Here!]
Day 13: "I don't feel so good" with Tighnari from Genshin impact [Here!]
Day 14: "Just hold on" with Heizou from Genshin impact [Here!]
Day 15: "I don't need you to help me, I can handle things myself" with Ayato from Genshin impact [on hold]
Day 16: "Don't go where I can't follow" with Lyney from Genshin impact [on hold]
Day 17: "Leave me alone!" with brother!Mika from Genshin impact [On hold]
Day 18: Blindfold/tortured for information with Venti from Genshin impact [on hold]
Day 19: "I'll take one final step, all you have to do is make me" with Ningguang from Genshin impact [on hold]
Day 20: "You will regret touching them"/found family with Siblings!Bennet, Razor and Fischl from Genshin impact [in progress]
Day 21: "Don't move" with Kazuha from Genshin impact [in progress]
Day 22: "Watch out!" with Neuvillette from Genshin impact [in prohress]
Day 23: "Who's there?" with Childe from Genshin impact [in progress]
Day 24: Neglect with Aether from Genshin impact [in progress]
Day 25: "They're not breathing!" with Cyno from Genshin impact [in progress]
Day 26: "You look awful" with sibling!Chongyun from Genshin impact [in progress]
Day 27: "Let me see" with Xiao from Genshin impact [in progress]
Day 28: "You'll have to go through me" with Lynette from Genshin impact [in progress]
Day 29: "I only sink deeper the deeper I think" with Baizhu from Genshin impact [in progress]
Day 30: "It's ok to say 'I'm not ok'" with Lyney from Genshin impact [in progress]
Day 31: "Take it easy" with Aether from Genshin impact [in progress]
If there are prompts you want to see with certain characters send a request and ill write something for them and add it to the masterlist<3
masterlist will be updated as I make the posts!
last update: 14th of october 2023, 10:53pm (AEST)
#genshin x reader#genshin impact#genshin impact x reader angst#wanderer x reader#wanderer x reader angst#heizou x reader#heizou x reader angst#tighnari x reader#tighnari x reader angst#Cyno x reader#cyno x reader angst#freminet x reader#freminet x reader angst#bennet x reader#bennet x reader angst#kaeya x reader#kaeya x reader angst#abyss prince aether x reader#abyss!aether x reader#whumptober#whumptober 2023
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This talks about injuries so if that bothers you I will understand if you just want to say you’ll delete the request. Can I request Knockout, starscream, and or smokescreen with a human reader who got seriously hurt. Like maybe they tagged along for recon and ended up in the middle of an autobot vs Decepticon scuffle. I’m thinking maybe rocks in an emerging mine fell on them. They had injuries and cracked skull, they made it to a human hospital barely. I can see the EMPs having to restart their heart in the hospital parking lot as they are getting the human reader inside. How would they react to that?
Knockout's a bit squeamish whenever it comes to seeing human injuries, so he's trying not to gag as he gets you to the hospital. Things like these—like when the doctors had to restart your heart—times like these really make him regret having not studied human anatomy more. He calls you the following day and keeps in touch throughout your recovery. And if you were to ever ask to join him on another mission again, he'd have to refuse. He'd explain that he doesn't want you to get hurt again and instead tell you to wait for him to come back from the mission, or just head home and wait till he's free again.
Starscream's worried about whether you'll survive or not—and after watching the doctors reset your heart in the middle of the parking lot, he doesn't have much hope you'll make it out alive. He's upset that humans are so fragile and he's upset that he even brought you along in the first place. Of course it'll be easy for you to die out in the middle of a battlefield, you're small, you're squishy, you're not built to handle things that cybertronians can come out of with barely a scratch. The next time you ask to join him, he'll refuse to bring you along no matter what you say. He'll say it's because he doesn't want to clean up whatever mess you've left if you died.
Smokescreen feels responsible for your injuries and thinks that it's all his fault. The fact that the human doctors had to restart your heart is like salt in the wound. The entire time you're being treated in the hospital, he's outside beating himself up for the fact you were injured. And if you happened to fall unconscious, you'll wake up to about 20 or so missed calls from him on your phone. It'll take quite a lot of assurance from you to make him feel that he wasn't responsible for what happened. For a long while afterward he insists that you shouldn't join him on recon encase it happens again.
#tfp imagines#tfp headcanons#tfp x reader#tfp knockout#knockout x reader#tfp starscream#starscream x reader#tfp smokescreen#smokescreen x reader#injury tw#tw injury#injury#x reader#reader insert#self insert#weenwrites
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Enough
Short Joel x reader thing that came to me tonight. Read on Ao3.
TW: Mention of canon type of violence, reference to sexy stuff. Yearning!
For the first time in twenty years, you have shameful daydreams about what it would be like to be loved again. Still, you know it's not in the cards, not anymore, not the way the world looks.
Not with Joel Miller.
The two of you work well together. Equally tight-lipped and no-nonsense, he's as deadly as you are fearless. There have been times when you have wondered, like when he beat up a competitor who threatened you, or gave you his jacket when the two of you were stuck in a cold attic overnight during a raid, or that time you were chased by clickers into what you thought was a dead end, and he gave you a look you had never seen on him before. It scared you, because it was vulnerable, and Joel Miller does not do vulnerable. It took you years to even understand that his knees were bad, that he had an old gunshot wound that made his shoulder ache in cold weather.
But you daydream now, because of how he reacted when you followed him to a meeting with a supplier, and he got double-crossed, and you stepped in and saved him. He was furious with you after, pacing and growling at you, and it made you angry in return, so you yelled at him. He towered above you, a head taller than you, and you raised your hand to shove him, but he grabbed your wrist, and then his lips were on yours, and he was stealing your breath along with your heart. He invaded all your senses, and your pussy, and you welcomed him into you.
After, he straightened out his clothing without looking at you. You forced him to face you, and you told him that you regretted nothing. Did you see the ghost of a smile on his face, or did he just grimace?
He became a regular guest in your bed after that, however. Always efficient and to the point, he would conjure the most unfamiliar sounds from you, bring you to heaven, make you fall through the clouds. He even took to sleeping over, his impossibly broad back a very effective wall between his heart and yours. You don't reach for him, only bask in the aftermath of your coupling, cherish his rough touch on your skin. You bear the bruises lovingly, sometimes pressing them during the day just to bring back the memory of his touch.
It's all that he can offer you, and you come to realize that it is more than he has offered anyone in over 20 years. You know that there can't be more. You want and don't want more. This is for the best.
It is enough for you. But you still dream about the day (you imagine it's a sunny, warm spring day, and you would be in a place that has exploded with green) when he'll look at you with younger eyes, and take him into your arms, and kiss you for love and not for physical need. You'll wear a dress and have clean hair. He'll wear a smile and have shaved.
"Hey," he grunts, and you wake up from your reverie. The world is dust and bones and dusk, and Joel is looking at you.
"You with me? We need to go."
"Sure."
There it is again, that look. A split moment of concern and care, before it's gone, and he starts down the road. You follow, safe in his shadow.
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Whumptober 2023 Masterlist
prompts
ao3
Once More We Fight
day 1- swooning, how many fingers am I holding up
fandom: Percy Jackson
TW- injury briefly described but not graphically
summary- Percy gets injured and Annabeth has to figure out how to help him
Sick Day
day 2- thermometer
fandom-spiderman
summary- Peter gets sick but he still has a chemistry test to take
No Air to Breathe
day 3- solitary confinement
fandom-batman
TW-slight depression
summary-Dick's been locked in a room and he just wants to know why
Shock Therapy
day 4-cattle prod/shock
fandom-batman
TW-torture
summary- Jason's plan doesn't go how he thought it would, and he faces the consequences
Fighting for Air to Breathe
day 5- debris/pinned down
fandom- Spiderman
TW-injury, disassociation, panic, claustrophobia
summary- Peter is once more trapped beneath rubble. But at least this time he's not alone.
Unknown Caller
day 6- recording/made to watch
fandom-spidermen
TW- slight torture-nothing graphic
summary- someone wants Stark weapons, and they've got the leverage to get them
I'll be There
day 7- alleyway/radio silence
fandom- batman
TW- character is drugged
summary- Tim missed a check in and Jason's the closest to his location.
Out at Sea
day 8- outnumbered
fandom- six of crows
TW- blood, death of random characters
summary- mercenaries attack Inej's ship and she has to do everything she can to protect her crew.
To Succeed is to Fail
day 9- mistaken identity
fandom- Danny phantom x Batman
TW- nothing
summary- The Amity Parkers have the opportunity (they didn't want) to explore Gotham. It's just too bad that Danny looks a lot like adoption bait.
To Sink or Swim
day 10- stranded
fandom- Danny phantom x dc
TW- panic
summary- After a portal spits Danielle out onto an abandoned island she has to try everything she can to get back home.
Trapped
day 11- captivity/no one will find you
fandom- Danny phantom x batman
TW- mind control, electrocution, manipulation, bad vibes
summary- Danny has been under the cultist's control for a month and he's not doing so good.
Investigations are Attempted
day 12- red
fandom- Danny phantom x batman
TW- none
summary- Bruce and his kids continue to look into Daniel Nightingale.
Brothers
day 13- cold compress
fandom- batman
TW- sickness
summary- Tim is definitely not sick. Jason disagrees.
Just Hold On
day 14- just hold on
fandom- Batman
TW- none
summary- Batman is investigating Black Mask activity when he finds someone he never expected to see again
Partial Explanations
day 15- I'm fine
fandom-dp x dc
TW- none
summary- Jason finds out he's still got a foot in the land of the dead.
Hope is a Fragile Thing
day 16- gurney
fandom- Batman
TW- none
summary- Bruce brings Jason Red Hood back to the cave.
Consequences
day 17-collar
fandom- Danny phantom
TW- electric shock
summary- Danny tries to get the collar off
A Bird in Hand
day 18- blindfolded
fandom- batman
TW=threats
summary- Slade is on a job when he comes across a captured bird.
Creativity Denied
day 19- I'm not as stupid as you think I am
fandom- batman
TW- none
summary- Dick wants to make something special for Bruce's birthday
Let's Make a Deal
day 20- you'll regret touching them
fandom- batman
TW- human trafficking mentioned
summary- Jason come across a captured Nightwing while meeting with a gang leader.
Summonings
day 21- restraints
fandom- dp x dc
TW- none
Summary- Dick and Damian are captured in order to sacrifice to the ghost king.
Black Ice
day 22- vehicular accident
fandom- Danny phantom
TW- character death
summary- The Fentons had always been bad drivers
The Camera Lens
day 23- stalking
fandom- batman
TW- canon typical violence
summary- Jason has a stalker
Out of the Cold
day 24- neglect
fandom- dp x dc
TW- none
summary- Jazz and Danny follow Barbara back to her apartment
Ignore the Doubt
day 25- storm
fandom- batman
TW- none
summary- Tim and Dick arrive in the cave to find a possibly unconscious Jason Todd.
You Look Awful
day 26- 'you look awful'
fandom- Danny phantom
TW- none
summary- Valerie and Danny have a group project
He's a Phantom
day 27- let me see
fandom- dp x dc
TW- brief injury
summary- Jason encounters the GIW
What We Have in Common
day 28- bloody knife
fandom- dp x dc
TW- none
summary- Danny helps Jason heal
Sleepy Summons
day 29- scented candle
fandom- dp x dc
TW- none
summary- Danny just wants to go to sleep
Unexpected Company
day 30- borrowed clothing
fandom- dp x dc
TW- none
summary- Dick meets Danny
To be Awake
day 31- take it easy
fandom- batman
TW- panic attack
summary- Jason wakes up
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Perpollo for the playlist <3 Have fun! :D
This was too fun lol, also I'm editing it to add lyrics for funsies
ALL UP IN YOUR MIND - Beyonce
I try to get all up in your mind (all up in your mind)
Is my love a crime 'cause I wanna make you mine?
(You know you're mine)
I try to get all up in your mind (yeah)
I'll go and do the time if it means I'll make you mine (yeah)
Habibi - Tamino
If only I'd forget you after one last dance
But you're everywhere, yes you are
In every melody and in every little scar
We Have It All - Pim Stones
Hearts turn to dirt
Along with the rest of your body
It's all claimed by the earth
It will fade and it will wither
But gold, it will never
And hey, baby, don't you know
Diamonds are forever
Stalker's Tango - Autoheart
It's not that complicated
No matter what they say
You'll never meet another me
The Wolf - PHILDEL
You were sharp as a knife to get me
You were a wolf in the night to fetch me, back
The wishes I've made are too vicious to tell
Everyone knows I am going to hell
Million Years Ago - Adele
I know I'm not the only one
Who regrets the things they've done
Sometimes I just feel it's only me
Who can't stand the reflection that they see
I wish I could live a little more
Achilles Heel - J. Maya
Kill this Achilles' heel
I don't want to have to heal
Now it's time to bring the choir
Play your game and string the lyre
Boy, I'm like Prometheus, finally taking back my fire
Moonsea - PHILDEL
Don't share the past, if you won't share your heart
All that we share is the view of these stars
That Unwanted Animal - The Amazing Devil
Oh, and you rip my ribcage open and devour what's truly yours
And our screaming joins in unison, I cry out to the Lord
'Cause if we join our hands in prayer enough
To God, I imagine it all starts to sound like applause
Perseus [New Light EP] - Chris Linton
Mythical, so mystical, think what you like
You could be the sword, the shield,
Defender of
The people down below
You know I fought for love
Personal Jesus - Depeche Mode
Reach out, touch faith
Your own personal Jesus
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who cares
I Love You, Honeybear - Father John Misty
But don't ever doubt this, my steadfast conviction
My love, you're the one I wanna watch the ship go down with
Killshot - Slowed + Reverb - Magdalena Bay
Can you make my heart stop
Hit me with your kill shot baby
Blossoms - The Amazing Devil
Knowing every last one of them is painted in light
As I make myself acquainted with the saint of never getting it right
A Kiss - THE DRIVER ERA
Don't give a fuck of what you say
Apparently I've lost control
To all my friends that told me so
Just get out the way
Because we don't want to behave
Apparently you lost control
You never really had before
Eros and Apollo - Studio Killers
Girls, with a boy like that it's serious
Senoritas, don't follow him
Soon, he will eat your hearts like cereals
Sweet Lolitas, don't go
You're still young
the fruits - Paris Paloma
My love, are you the devil?
I would worship you instead of him
I have no time for confession
For I'm too busy committing sins
My love, you're something special
I've never met someone like you
You'd make me fall from heaven
But I know just what I do
One Way Or Another - Blondie
One way, or another, I'm gonna win ya
I'm gonna get ya, get ya, get ya, get ya
One way, or another, I'm gonna see ya
You Spin Me Round (Like A Record) - Dead or Alive
I set my sights on you
(And no one else will do)
And I, I've got to have my way now, baby
Something to Believe In - Young the Giant
It gets old when you talk to the sun
And your tongue understood uh-no one
// 20 song playlist without including these artists
#Ask#60sec400#Percy Jackson and the Olympians#Perpollo#Playlists with Restrictions#not gonna lie taking out florence and hozier did some damage#could be improved#but for now?#not mad about it#unhealthy relationships have better playlists#😌
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To 13 Year Old Me, Somewhere in the Omniverse
Dear 13 year old me...
I know that right now you life seems like it is absolute shit. It hurts. And you're angry. And you don't feel like you can trust anyone. I'm here to let you know, eventually it will get better. And in 30 years, you'll have a daughter who is 13, and you'll find yourself reliving a lot of dormant old feelings that you thought you had gotten past
I regret to tell you that your relationship with your mother will grow more tenuous as time rolls on. She equally works to elevate you (her stated intention) all the while hacking you down at the knees. After much ballyhooing and drama, you stopped talking to her, multiple times. It sticks shortly after your 42nd birthday.
Because of her, you will find that you have a veritable cornucopia of neuroses. In truth, Eric, with as hard as she projected a lot of shit onto you. You have all of the bullshit about looking like your father, to swallow. You have all of the bullshit that accompanied Jake, your older half-brother whom you haven't met yet. You'll meet him in high school. I'll tackle him more, a bit later. He plays an important role in who you become as a man. You have all of the bullshit splash back from your parents interacting, and the passive-aggressive hostility shared in front of you. You have the extended family bullshit. And there's so much. And you have to endure it all. And you have to deal with a lot, but there is good in there too.
Let's talk about some of the good. You are a little more than a year, if not less than, from starting high school. It will take you a bit of time to get your bearings at Trinity, but eventually you will. Because of all of the shit you are dealing with at the moment you're reading this, you will have a hard, hard time adjusting to the environment. But, once you get your feet under you, you start to collect your little group.
You, Eric, are a late bloomer. You have a lot of social anxieties, you will have a tendency to binge when partying. Any little thing to get those damned racing, intrusive thoughts. And I know how rough those thoughts are on you. I regret to inform you that they don't go away, the message they browbeat you with just changes as you get older.
The relationships you develop with Mike, and Bill, and Andy, will be the ones you look back at with the most romance. You'll fuck up your friendship with Mike in during the summer going into senior year. It is entirely irrational, and retrospectively stupid, but at the time it was the most important thing in the world to you. And you feel his loss the following year when he's off at college, and you two fall out of touch. You and Bill, and you and Andy, periodically encounter each other out in public, but as an adult, Mike lives in Indy.
That perceived fuck up to your friendship set you back into this weird place, mentally, where you felt like you were a bit of a social transient. As in, you have no "home group". You just gravitated to whomever would let you lurk in the background. That mentality stays with you, well into adulthood. You're careful to get too close to people, you're afraid they'll dislike what they see when they meet the real you. And, that will be a problem you will deal with, and it will evolve multiple times, throughout your life.
I feel like I'm giving you a lot of warnings. And believe you me, I have a lot of warnings for you. I really want to give you these warnings. And other little glimpses into your future. To give you hope, during the days when everything feels its most darkest.
So, let me tell you about 43 year old me. Maybe this will help you. As you gathered earlier, you are a father. A 13 year old girl, Olivia Grace. The Olivia being lifted from Kelly Monaco's character on Port Charles. The Grace being taken from a girl called Evie whom you have a crush on, from your mid-20s. You also have a 9 year old boy, Owen Russell. Owen being the name that you and his mother could agree upon, even though you had your heart set on Elliott. Russell, of course, being Pop-Pops.
I regret to inform you that he dies at the end of your sophomore year of high school. You have 3 years with him, love him as hard as you can while you have him. His is a loss which will affect you for a very long time. In truth, I don't know that I have mourned for him, me. Sometimes, it feels so long ago, that you get angry with yourself that your memories of him have faded. They're all fuzzy and hazy with time. And they're completely intangible, and it hurts. It really hurts, sometimes. And as an adult, with your kids, you find you miss him the most, because you wish he was around so you could share the kids with him.
I cannot state to you how important Olivia will be on you. Your entire world, headspace...everything...in you, will changes because of her. You are going to go through the most painful struggle in your life for her. It will push you to places you never knew you were capable of, and it will absolutely wreck you. There is no way to soften that. It hurts. It stings. It will make you fucking mad. Irrationally angry. And you'll never cry more in your life. And, dude, that's okay. Process and experience what you're feeling. Otherwise it will destroy you, and even though I know what happens, I'm sorry you will experience this pain. But Olivia, she's your little clone. She's like someone copied you, then made you female just so they wouldn't be accused of plagiarism. After everything that happens, and you and Olivia finally are able to develop a relationship, it's the most amazing thing ever. She is proof, Eric, that you can love someone and fall in love with them more with each day.
Owen has a totally different relationship with you. And entirely different experience with you, growing up, contrasted to Olivia. You and Owen have always had a complicated relationship. He adores you, and he wants so badly to be like you, but you find it hard to relate to him because of how much of who he is, is CCed from his mother. He loves Transformers, He-Man, and a bunch of things that you don't understand. And that's okay. It just makes it hard to find common ground. You have video games too. But his experience is so removed from yours, that you find it increasingly difficult to connect with him. As he will be turning 10 soon, you're looking for him to mature a bit.
It does get better. You meet an amazing woman called Lindsay, after many years of bad judgment, listening to the wrong people, and just not being mature enough to handle the reality. You will move to Florida for 8 months, in 2004. You'll find, your adult life has two very distinct phases, maybe even three. And within those phases, chapters overflow. As of time of writing this, you have been officially engaged once. To the older sister of a girl your sisters did Irish Dance with. You've had a handful of serious relationships. Nothing really seemed to stick until Lindsay; and you, very nearly, fucked that all to hell. But, from that, you and Lindsay go through your greatest period of turbulence, which ultimately gives way to the both of you finding your feet in the relationship, and both growing as people in support of each other. You're a very lucky man.
You will graduate from Trinity, in 1999. As I said before, Pop-Pops passes during your sophomore year. You will also lose one of your favorite teachers your senior year. High school sucks. Just flat out sucks. Trinity feels very stifling. Made you feel very claustrophobic at times. At the same time, there were men who left lasting impressions upon you. You will go on Senior Retreat, and you will be placed in a room with someone who spends the whole of the time not understanding why he chose to go. You'll resent that, by the way. Anyway, yeah, your high school experience won't feel too different from how Holy Spirit feels, at this point. You don't really notice a difference in the way you're perceived, until your junior year. But, you'll find that the bullying you have experience pretty much ends in 11th grade. You're almost past it dude. And it's going to suck. But you're almost free of it.
Forgive me this aside, but there are multiple significant experiences as an adult with individuals who bullied you as a kid. I have to tell you, the first is Matt. I know how you feel about him now. I know you wish that he wouldn't put all of his bullshit onto you. I know that you seethe for the misery he makes you feel. But, one day, you run into him at the Qdoba in the Highlands, and while you're standing in line waiting to order, you two have a really serious chat. In this chat, he apologises to you, openly weeping, for all of the shit. All of it. And he was sincere. Life did a fucking number on him, and he dies of a heroin OD. That's a loss that will have as profound an impact on you, as if it was someone you loved. Your stories were inextricably tied, and for the both of you, you both got your peace from it. And now he finally has peace from his demons. There was Grant. Grant had a lot problems. The last time you saw him, was in the Highlands, and you two shot the shit like old friends. He had previously apologised to you, in Books-A-Million, for everything. Grant died of organ failure, from years of hard drug usage. That one didn't sting. But those were kids I grew up with. Kids whom you currently call peers. Be kind to them, Eric. Even when it hurts you to be kind, show them empathy. Be a good man. Be the man you want your kids to look up to. You can do it.
So after high school, you entered the workforce. And found it grossly lacking. When you weren't working, you were probably on AOL in the Thinkers chatroom. A lot of very important people in your life came out of there. Eventually, you started hanging out with Danny. Later started going to Denny's. Out of that, you met an odd variety of people. Some of whom you'd retain association with, for 20 years on. Some of which, you'll come to find, you wish you had never met. That will lead you into running to Florida. And Florida will lead you into Olivia. Everything post-Olivia has just kind of rippled from her.
I still play bass. I've also added guitar. I can actually, half competently play both. You got your Rickenbacker bass, your Paul bass, and you named it Amber (your story-crossed lover from Thinkers, as the serial number on the bass dates it to her 40th birthday week. You have the SG you were suggested to get, by Uncle Mark. Somewhere around when you were 18 or 19, you got a left handed Lotus Strat copy. You've adorned it with stickers over the years, relating to hands that you listened to during that period. Even if the stickers were added years later. Music is still your happy place. Your passion. You get to see 3 bands that you haven't discovered yet, who become your favorite bands of all-time. And dude, your taste in music is about to get weird. Like, fucking weird. And you're going to love most, if not close to all, of it.
You've come to like other things in the interim. You haven't really begun your diving into hockey. You're going to have so much fun with that. After that, you got into soccer. Eventually, through soccer, you end up with your own local club. Two, in fact.
Are you ready for this? Because of soccer, you find a voice you didn't know you had in you. You became a leader for a supporter's group, read: fan club. You get to travel to Detroit, after not being in Michigan for nearly 20 years. You get to travel to Ohio. You get to travel to Pittsburgh, with Rovers, as part of the club. You took a solo trip down to Chattanooga for a soccer game. You made some great connections, but a lot of things converged to lead you into a new direction.
I'm proud to say that you have been, continually, employed since 2008. You have moved up from the level of a lowly retail clerk, to being a team lead at a major pharmaceutical company. Your first "wage" will be $5 an hour, as part of Work Study at Trinity. At this point, you are just shy of $25 an hour, as your wage. It seems like a lot now. But, dude, adulting kills your ability to spend money on things you enjoy. But, in fairness to you, you'll be pleased to know that as it stands, you're currently being paid to do nothing all day. That will obviously change, at some point. But you haven't really done much of anything, since August. Oh, I should tell you that because of a dumb fucking pandemic, which could have been handled significantly better by the powers that be, you have the luxury of working from home. Full fucking remote. And the tech that you will be encountering in a few years, will make all of that possible. For as much as you hate the job. As much as you hate the intra-office politics. As much as you hate making someone else money, you get paid a pretty decent sum to just sit and fuck around for 8 hours a day.
I do want let you know that you will have trust issues for many years. There's going to be some serious betrayals. Some of them were, at the time, your closest friends. And those betrayals hurt. As a quick aside, apologise to Adam. I understand that you bullied him, to take the heat off yourself, but you still did someone who was your friend absolutely dirty. Sincerely, do it. He deserves better than that. You'll find as you grow older, he's a better man than you, a bigger man. You'll always feel like that, because of how you treated him. Please don't do that to yourself or to him. Defend him. Stand at his side. But undertand that you are going to have a skewed concept of loyalty. And a skewed sense of morality.
A lot of the toxicity around you, will affect you, and will influence you. Just make sure to repay any kindness and empathy given. You'll find yourself surrounded with a lot of negativity, and it will play itself out in the people whom you surround yourself with. A sense of disillusionment with that negativity led you down to Florida. And when you returned home after 8 months, those same peers made absolutely sure to make their opinions of you known. And now, 20 years later, you're not really in contact with any of those people. Out of that whole group, I don't think there's more than one or two whom you actively keep up with.
What is really amazing though, is that those people whom you are closest to, absolutely fucking love you. And care about you. And want you to be happy. And, honestly, at the end of the day, that's all you could have asked for. Lindsay loves you for reasons which you'll never understand. And you love her in ways you can't understand either, but you feel like you are in a safe and stable place to do a good bit of personal growth. And she's there with you, to support you through anything. And you're there doing the same. Dude, it's fucking incredible you can do, when you work as a team with someone. And then, you can go and sleep next to them, after the day. It's wild.
Anyway, while on the inside, a lot of times, the feeling is melancholic, meh, blah, or some such description; your life is really amazing. You have made it to 43, with no severe health issues. You have two kids who are healthy. None of you can see for shit though. You have a woman who wants to build her world around you, and while she may drive you insane at points; you'll find that her presence is secure to you, so you're comfortable with taking off the costume. She brought Wilbur and Akira into your life. You and Wilbur get along famously. You and Akira do care about each other, you just have a personality conflict. You're not going to mesh with everyone, and that's okay.
You're going to be okay.
Sincerely,
Eric (age 43)
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Something New [Tech x Reader]
A/N: saw this video on insta and I was like, gotta write it for Tech 😏 also not the Tech fic I was talking about in my updates post - literally wrote this in like 20 mins lol
Word Count:
"Mesh'la?"
"Hmm?"
"C'mere a minute. I want to try something with you."
Tech had his serious voice on, the one he reserved for giving out his data statistics and nerdy stuff as you could call it. So when he called you, you knew he meant business, but didn't know what type of business.
"What's up?" You asked, as you sat down besides him, running a hand up and down his thigh in comfort. "Did Crosshair say something again? Tell me and I'll-
"No, no mesh'la he didn't. Well- Actually that's not what I wanted to say." Tech quickly shut down your notions of Crosshair being mean to him.
"Tech..." You asked suspiciously as you narrowed you eyes at him. "What do you need?"
"Well." Tech started. "I saw something on the holonet and er- I er- wanted to try it out with you." He finished off, his voice changing into a slightly higher pitch before he cleared his throat.
"Ooh! Okay! What is it?" You asked, eyes wide and eager to know what he wanted to do.
"I can't tell you." Tecj explained. "I just need you to follow my instructions, can you do that mesh'la?"
Nodding in agreement you smiled at your boyfriend. "Okay! Wait- this isn't something illegal right? Because if it is-
"Y/N!"
"-you know I don't mind, I'd just to be informed of it beforehand, you know?"
Tech quickly covered your mouth with his hand, making you shut up immediately. "Shush. It is not illegal. It is perfectly fine. Just- just listen to me."
You nodded as he removed his hand from your mouth. "Okay."
"I need you to stand up firstly, just by this wall okay?" Tech directed you to where he wanted you to be, making you stand a few inches from the wall so you back wasn't touching it. "Perfect."
"Now I need you to copy me." Tech quickly took his gloves off, throwing them onto his bunk as he showed you what he wanted you to do with your hands. "I need you to place your palms against one another..."
"Like this?"
"Yes. Now clasp them together and- perfect!" Tech smiled happily before going you the last instruction. "Now I need you to lift your right hands fingers up."
Before you could even process what had happened, Tech had attached his hand to yours, holding them as he pushed your hands above your head. Your whole body moving back against the wall as you let out a soft gasp.
Tech had your hands trapped above your head while he slotted his mouth to your neck, making you moan in response. His lips moved across your neck, leaving harsh kisses as he sucked on your sweet spot.
"Tech!" You moaned, slightly giddy as you rolled your eyes back. "Wha- I- I wasn't expecting that!"
Feeling his lips curl up into a smile, Tech's free hand curled around your hips, tugging your body to his as he slowly grinded into you. "Well, mesh'la, I've go-
"Tech! Y/N! Not in the ship!" Wrecker let out a groan of annoyance as Echo quickly covered Omega's innocent eyes.
"Tech, not in front of the kid!" Hunter rolled his eyes, tugging Omega away from the two of you.
"Get a room." Crosshair snarled as he rolled his eyes.
"Well. I guess we'll have to cut this short Tech." You grinned, winking at his as you slipped a hand down to palm him, causing Tech to let out a low growl at your antics. "I sure hope you've got more moves that that mister."
Smirking as you walked away, Tech replied "You'll regret saying that mesh'la..."
***
Taglist: @tobitofunction @pinkiemme @lysawayne @shadowfoxey @starwarsworld @theeicedamericano @darthmama1618 @justanothersadperson93 @liadamerondjarin
#tech x reader#tech x y/n#tech x you#clone trooper tech#tech#tech bad batch#star wars#the bad batch#bad batch#melissa writes 💕
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Cloud Nine
Dong Sicheng
Mature content
Sub!Sicheng x Dom! Reader
warnings : unprotected sex, dacryphilia, edging, face riding, oral sex, 69, etc.
word count : 2.1k
Newly weds on a honeymoon at Maldives.
The scent of the salty sea greets you when your boyfriend, correction, newly wed husband, Sicheng opens the doors of the balcony of your suite, the sun rays hitting his golden skin perfectly as a light breeze blows in.
“I’m so glad we picked Maldives for our honeymoon, the time zone would be perfect for avoiding my mom’s phone calls,” Sicheng says with a shake of his head and a small smile, recalling how his mom was keen on having a grandchild, brining it up to you ever since the wedding night. Sicheng does want kids, or preferably kid, but the thought of spending his 20s with a child wasn’t his idea of utilizing his youth, and you totally agree with him, cringing at the thought of changing diapers in your 20s, glad that he’s not the type to push you for children.
“Your mom would be so upset when she finds out I’m on the pill, she thought it was the lack of privacy that discouraged us to have some quality time,” you said with a snicker, thinking back of the times when you and Sicheng did it in utmost silence when the two of you were back in his home town for q a visit after the wedding.
“She just doesn’t know how much of a freak are you,” Sicheng said in a voice octaves lower close to your ear, when did he get this close to you? You swear he was two feet away just now. Then you feel a familiar hand lingering up the hem of your sundress, dangerously close to the swell of your butt.
“I know you’re hungry for me, mister, but I’d like to have dinner first, the meal on the plane left me starving, it was barely enough,” you complained, a hand on his chest, stopping him from going any further.
“I told you to fly first class, business is just roomier, not much difference compared to economy,” Sicheng said as he led you out of the suite, a hand securely wrapped around your waist.q
“I just wanted to save some money,” you said in a huff, rubbing your rumbling stomach, regretting that you didn’t take your husband’s advice.
“Well, just don’t hold back afterwards, order whatever you want,” Sicheng said before booping your nose with his finger, leading you to the dining hall after the click of your hotel suite door.
“I think I should be getting my dessert now,” Sicheng said after pulling you into your suite in a haste, hands cupped around your cheeks, his face was mere centimetres away from yours, you could see his pupils blown wide at the thought of the things he'd like to do to you.
“Can I have a present first?” you said while batting your eyes at him, your voice sickly sweet, tempting him to submit.
“What does my dearest wife want?” Sicheng said while sitting onto the edge of the comfy bed, opening his legs to let you climb onto his lap.
“I want to be on top,” you said with an evil twinkle in your eyes before reaching a hand out to push him flat onto the bed.
“Just one round,” Sicheng bargained, he really wanted to hear you screaming his name, but that can wait, after all, you did give him your hand in marriage, it's only fair that there's give and take in a relationship.
You jumped in glee hearing his permission, immediately letting your hands wander to his chest, only to unbutton the white top he's wearing, nails playfully scratching at his chest lightly until the last button goes off, revealing his honey skin and perky nipples, hard from your teasing and the exposure of the chilly night breeze from the crack of the balcony door.
You let your hips circle on top of his crotch as you leant down to connect your lips to his, a hand lightly pinching his right nipple before rolling it gently in between your fingers, doing the same to the one on the left.
“Fuck,” Sicheng swears in between your attack on his lips, giving you the opportunity to slide your tongue into his mouth, dominating the kiss. You decided to pour oil into the fire by grinding your hips onto his crotch harder, feeling the sudden wake of his hardness, eliciting a moan in your throat when you think of how well he’s going to fill you up.
You got up from his lap to pull off your dress, revealing you in a matching set of red lingerie, your ego inflating when you see the awe in Sicheng’s eyes.
“Strip, baby,” you ordered Sicheng.
Obedient to your words, he immediately got up to pull off his pants along with his underwear, his cock slapping against his abs once it was free from its confinements, hissing at the feeling of the cold air.
“Good boy,” you said as you sat yourself back into his lap, the lace of your panties digging into the sensitive skin of his cock, a perfect combination of pain and pleasure, but he coos at the feeling of your warm wetness, relieving a tiny bit of his desperation.
“What do you want baby? Do you want my mouth? Or my pussy? I'll let you choose,” you offered, but as your husband, Sicheng knows there will always be a catch, “but with a price of course, prove to me you’re my good boy and I'll give you what you desire,” you bargained.
“Anything for me to be inside you, please,” Sicheng added the last part, knowing you love hearing him beg.
“I want to ride your pretty face, boy, and don’t disappoint,” you said before getting off of him and taking off your panties, manoeuvring yourself on top of his face.
You were going to glance down to check if Sicheng was okay, but when he saw your perfectly slicked pussy, he was hungry for a taste, lowering your hips hastily onto his mouth, getting a surprised moan out of you at the feeling of his wet tongue invading your warm cavern.
“Yes, just like that baby, you're doing so well,” you said as you grind onto his mouth lightly, tossing your head back when you felt him adding two of his fingers into the mix, expertly locating your sweet spot after a few tries.
“Baby, yes, right there, don't stop,” you said breathlessly, which encouraged him to thrust his fingers harder and setting the pace faster, chasing your release of sweet juices.
Since he was making you feel so good, you decided to reward him. You leant down to take his cock into your mouth, letting the head of his dick hit the back of your throat as your hand slid down to fondle one of his balls, which made him moan into your pussy, fuck, you aren't going to last long if he keeps it up.
You realese his cock from your mouth after nearly a minute, a hand sliding down to your clit, rubbing quick circles over the sensitive nub, assisting Sicheng in pushing you over the edge.
When his tongue replaced your fingers, he sucked on your clit expertly, successfully giving you an earth shattering orgasm, his name tumbling from your lips like a mantra, your toes curling and a whine escaping your lips at the oversensitivity, your juices gushing out in a steady flow into Sicheng’s awaiting mouth.
You slid off Sicheng’s face once you rode out your orgasm, gulping down breathes of air to ready yourself for what you have planned next.
After regaining a bit of your strength, you positioned yourself above Sicheng, a hand combing through his messed up locks with a sinister smile on your face, knowing well that you’re going to strip him boneless tonight.
Your hand travelled southwards to his cock, gripping it rather harshly in your fist at the tip of his head, making Sicheng’s head fall back onto the pillow from the overstimulation, a breathy gasp of your name leaving his swollen lips.
“I'm not finished with you yet, baby,” you reminded him tauntingly, before you lifted yourself up to down onto his cock, filling yourself up deliciously, thankful for the slight stretch he had given you beforehand.
“Fuck!” Sicheng cursed when he finally felt your warm walls engulfing his length, you felt so tight around him, and the little clenches that you're giving him was making him lightheaded, pleasure clouding his head.
You smirked at his reaction, pleased to see that it won't take too much to wreck him tonight.
You set a slow pace, letting yourself feel every ridge and vein that decorates his cock, after a few pumps, you decided to up your game, quickening your pace, bouncing on his cock as quick as your legs allowed, the whole room was filled with the sound of your butt clapping down onto his thighs, saying a silent apology to the room next to your bed’s. You could feel the tip hitting against your sweet spot, if it weren't for the fact that you constantly reminded yourself that you rarely get to top, you would've came already, but you want to seize this opportunity to see how far can Sicheng submit to you.
You let your hands wander to his erected nipples, pinching them which got a cry out of him, distracting him from enjoying the view of your tits bouncing right in his eyesight perfectly, he reached up to release your bra, letting your boobs fall out and bounce wildly. Just as he wanted to reach out to hold onto one of your boobs, you slapped his hand away.
“You'll get to touch when you prove to me you’re my good boy,” you said before leaving him hanging completely, letting his dick slide out of you in a rather comical pop after feeling a slight twitch inside you, a sign that he was about to cum soon.
Sicheng whined at the sudden loss of pleasure, “Please, I've been nothing but your good boy, please let me cum,” Sicheng begged.
“Be patient, baby, all good things come to those who wait,” you said while caressing his face gently.
You crawled to Sicheng's spread legs, a hand wrapping around his cock, setting an average pace, occasionally stopping to swipe at his bulging red tip that's craving for release. You bent your neck down to take one of his balls into your mouth, licking and sucking gently, the warmth of your mouth made Sicheng's legs twitch, a constricted moan of your name followed by.
You hummed around his ball in approval before switching to the other one, the most sensitive parts of his body, he didn't want to disobey you, but he could feel his release creeping up on him.
Just when he decided to fuck everything and receive whatever punishment you were going to give him, you suddenly clasped your thumb and your index finger around the head of his cock, restricting him from his sweet release.
“Fuck! Please, please let me cum, I'll do anything for you afterwards, please,” Sicheng begged, you looked up to observe his face, glee when you saw tears streaming down his face, his hands fisting the sheets.
“Aw, baby, was that too much? I just want to give you the best orgasm ever. What's your colour?” you asked, making sure he's alright.
“Green,” Sicheng replied immediately, his voice hoarse.
“Can I continue? You can cum inside me,” you said while brushing his bangs away from his eyes, you want to engrain the look he has on now, so fragile, so docile, just for you.
“Yes, please, just want to cum, inside you,” Sicheng said, no longer able to form a complete sentence as you have reduced him to your personal sex doll.
“Okay,” you said before reaching for his cock to slide into your entrance, once more filling you up deliciously.
You rocked your hips against his, positioning his head to your sweet spot before bouncing on his dick relentlessly, sliding a hand down your clit to stimulate yourself, chasing your highs together, knowing that Sicheng wouldn't be able to hold on any longer.
With a rough thrust of his hips, a deep piston that hit your g spot, you and Sicheng were pushed over the edge, a mix of a whine and a groan sounded in Sicheng's throat while you screamed his name, cumming onto his cock, the action made your walls clench around Sicheng, milking him for all he has, large spurts of warm cum painting your walls white.
When your orgasm subsided, you crashed onto Sicheng's chest, feeling the fatigue settling into your limbs. When you were about to manoeuvre yourself off of him, Sicheng held you closer.
“Don't move, let's stay like this,” he said in a raspy voice.
“Okay, goodnight Sicheng.”
“Goodnight, love.”
Needless to say, you are very much looking forward to the next few days of your honeymoon.
#nct smut#nct fluff#winwin smut#sicheng smut#winwin fluff#sicheng fluff#wayv smut#wayv#wayv scenarios#nct 127#nct#nct dream
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the horny bitch in me decided it was time for some hajime-nii // 2,7k words
cw: nsfw - fem!reader, incest, dubcon, manipulation, oral (male receiving), prostitution.
"Why am I doing this?" You muttered to yourself, hearing the sound of the shower in the room of the fanciest hotel you've ever been to. You're sitting on the king size bed, waiting for the man in the bathroom to join you. Who was it again? "Just an old associate" your brother told you when asking for this favor. You were to "seduce him, lure him to room 204 and have sex with him" easy, right? Your dear brother would take care of the rest. Apparently, they needed some shade on him and his wife was a wealthy woman who prided herself on the beautiful marriage they had, so what better than blackmailing him with footage of his affair with a much younger and prettier woman? Kokonoi Hajime always has his eyes on the money, and this was a big jackpot at the low price of whoring his sister to a perverted old man.
"You'll do this for me, right? You know how Sanzu does things. I don't want this bastard dead until I squeeze all his money out." he told you, cupping your face lovingly. "You're the only one I can trust with this. You'll get your part, I promise."
Now you wish Sanzu had gotten word of this first. How are you going to do this? This man does not attract you in the slightest. He's old, saggy and you're not sure if his teeth are even real. At least you managed to convince him to take a shower first.
"Are you ready, princess?" you cringe at the nickname.
"Of course, sir. I've been waiting." Please God make this quick "You can use my body as you please"
"Come here, let me see you" The man says, motioning for you to come closer. You do as he says, laying on top of his almost bare body. You can feel how hard he is already, grabbing your ass as soon as he can reach. He looks at you and points to his lower parts. You take the hint and bring yourself lower to take off his underwear. Your face just inches from his member, you close your eyes and hope you can get through this. Giving this old man head was never in your plans, but you'd do anything to help Hajime-nii. Ah, Hajime-nii. His face pops up in your mind, his soft lips, his beautiful slanted eyes that always look at you with such tenderness. Prompted by his image, your mouth starts working eagerly on the man's cock. Not wanting to open your eyes and ruin the fantasy, you keep sucking breathlessly. You don't know if you're trying to make the man finish as soon as possible or the image of Hajime-nii in your head is making you start to enjoy this. Just as you start to think about it, the man aggresively grabs your head, pushing you down on his cock and cumming down your throat. Thank God that's over.
"Good girl, you did great." He says, smiling at you. Ugh, you never thought you'd be disgusted hearing those words. They sounded so good out of Hajime-nii's mouth, yet here you were, grossed out by the sound of them.
"Take off your clothes, sweetheart" Please stop with the nicknames. "Get on top of me" You do as he says, taking off the tight dress you wore, of course, courtesy of your dear older brother. Sighing, you lower yourself on him. You wait for a second, expecting him to do something, but he just looks at you expectantly.
"Fuck yourself on my cock, doll." Fuck, no. Not even a finger? Now you've done it. You see, you didn't tell anyone you were still a virgin. Not the man, not Hajime-nii. You were afraid you'd disappoint your brother, so you kept it to yourself. Taking some old dude shouldn't hurt too much, right?
"What are you waiting for?" You gulp and take a deep breath before finally positioning yourself and taking him all at once. You thought rushing it would make it more bearable, but now you're regretting it, tears forming in your eyes from the pain. The man groans and says something about you being untouched. To be honest, you're too focused on the pain to even hear what he says. Taking another deep breath, you start moving, grinding yourself on the man's member. The next few minutes are a blur. The pain, the suffering and the embarrassment of the situation make it hard to concentrate on anything.
"Damn, that was good. Guess I'll have to pay extra for being your first." The man says, winking at you. His voice brings you back to reality and you realize you're laying on the bed, make up ruined by the tears and completely exposed to the man that just took your virginity. He's already getting dressed again, nonchalantly tying his tie and grabbing his things, leaving a stack of bills on the nightstand before walking through the door without saying a word. Your hand immediately reaches for your phone, shaky hands scrolling through your contacts.
Hajime-nii 💞
Call.
Koko picks up at the second tone. His voice always manages to calm you down.
"What's up?" he says "Is it done?" You make an effort of holding back your tears.
"Yeah. Can you pick me up?" You say.
"Got it. I'll be there in 20. Order yourself some nice champagne, you deserve it." With that, he hangs up. You put down your phone and make your way to the bathroom. Normally you'd be so excited, filling the hot tub and getting in while you call room service and order the most expensive item on the menu, but now all you could do was look at your tired face in the mirror. You wash your face and take some deep breaths. Your brother can't see you like this. You decide you should take a short shower before he arrives, so you turn on the water and get in.
The water hits your skin with a force you didn't think was possible. Every part of your body hurts, and you can't stop the tears anymore. You let yourself cry under the hot water for a good five minutes before washing your body. You scrub with force, trying to get the memories off your skin but no matter how many times you soap and rinse, you can't get the feeling off. You feel dirty, and you can't do anything to clean that. Just as your thoughts start to consume you, you hear a knock on the door.
"Y/n? You there?" Hajime's voice coming from the other side is a much needed relief. You open the door, still wrapped in the hotel's white towel.
"You're still like that? Come on, put something on, we have to go." You nod as you disappear to the bathroom to put on your dress.
"Ready?" Koko says, sitting on the same bed you lost your innocence on.
"Yeah, let's go." You say while bolting out the door, saying goodbye forever to that damn room.
The ride home was silent. Koko drove as you quietly looked out the window. He must've sensed something was wrong, because he drove directly to his house, not stopping to drop you at yours. You silently thank him for this but decide not to comment on it, and neither does he. When you arrive, he opens the door and lets you in.
"Go to sleep, you must be tired." You nod and head to the guest room. Well, it wasn't really a guest room since you were the only one who stayed there. It was full of your things, it felt just like home. Maybe even more. You lay on your bed, not bothering to get in the sheets. In the dark of the night and the comfort of your room, you let the tears that were forming in your eyes out at last. How did you let things get like this? This was your fault, wasn't it? This is the only thing you were good at. You followed orders just to make everyone happy and waited for the much desired praise. Pathetic. Your thoughts quickly spiraled to a dark place and you started to feel out of breath. You sobbed, hiding your face in the pillow and gripping the sheets with force.
"Y/n..." you hear your name coming from the door. When you lift your head, Hajime is already sitting by your side. "What's wrong? Talk to me."
"Hajime-nii..." You can't even look at him in the eyes. Koko cups your face in his hands, making you look at him.
"You should've told me you didn't want to do it." He says, anguish evident in his eyes.
"I wanted to. I wanted to be useful to you. I wanted to be something good in your life." You say through the tears.
"Baby, you're the best thing in my life. You're my perfect little sister and it will always be like that." Hajime hugs you, resting your head on his chest. With his gaze no longer on you, he notices a red stain on the sheets. His heart stops for a second, realizing what had you so upset.
"Hey, baby, look at me." He takes your face in his hands once again. "Was this your first time?" You nod.
"Y/n, you should've told me. I would've never let that fucking bastard take your virginity." His heartbeat gets increasingly faster. "Why didn't you say anything!?" He raises his tone and you wince in reflex.
"I'm sorry..." You say lowering your head.
"Shh, hey, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, okay? I'm here now." His voice softens once again. "Does it hurt?" You nod and lay your head on his shoulder.
"Tell me where it hurts." Hajime kisses your temple. "Tell nii-san where he hurt you." He takes your hand in his and looks at you. You guide his hand to your chest and lay it on your breasts, the thin fabric of the old t-shirt he gave you being the only thing keeping his skin from touching yours.
"Did he hurt you here? Grabbed you too hard?" You nod, feeling his hypnotizing gaze on you. Koko lays you down softly on the silk sheets he got for you. He hovers over you and lifts your shirt slowly, allowing you time to stop him if you wish, but you let him continue. Bringing his lips to your waist, he kisses your stomach as he continues to push your shirt over your breasts. He leaves a trail of kisses going up your bust and takes your nipple into his mouth, softly running his tongue through your bud. Leaving some more kisses in the area, he looks up at you.
"Better?" You nod. "Does it hurt anywhere else?" You nod once again. "Show me." You take your brother's hand in yours and guide it to your lower area. Where a few hours ago you only felt a sharp pain now there is a heat growing with every touch.
"My baby... I shouldn't have let someone else take your virginity. I should've been your first." Rubbing your heat through your panties, Hajime kisses your lips softly. "You're too pure for this world. I'm not letting that happen again, okay? I promise." You nod, trying to focus on his words, but his touch is getting more and more satisfying. Your brother knows what he's doing to you. He knows how good he's making you feel, and he's not going to let anyone else see you like this ever again. Hajime removes your underwear and brings his hand to your mouth. You lick his fingers, getting impatient. He brings his hand to your cunt once again and spreads your folds. The sensation of his fingers massaging your clit feels so good you're almost forgetting your earlier experience. His movements are slow and sensual, treating you like the most delicate being. Your moans and whines are like music to his ears. His sweet little sister falling apart from his touch, there was nothing compared to that. He presses soft kisses to your temple as he inserts a finger in your cunt, making your moans get louder and louder.
"Shh, it's okay baby." He breathes against your ear. "Nii-san's gonna erase every trace of that man on your body." Those words combined with his touch make you fall over the edge, feeling the knot on your lower stomach come undone on his fingers.
"That's it, baby, you're doing so good." His words are so similar to the man's earlier yet they have a completely different effect on you. "You wanna make nii-san feel good too?"
"Y-yeah... I wanna make nii-san feel good." You say looking up at him, mesmerized by how good he looked right now. His long hair was sticking to his forehead, where small beads of sweat were forming. You can't recall when exactly he took off his shirt, exposing his svelte chest. He looked ethereal right now. You couldn't wrap your head around the fact that you're in the same situation as this evening, yet it feels so perfect now. Koko places himself between your legs, looking at you with a smile on his face.
"It won't hurt this time, I promise." he says as he lines up his cock with your entrance. "Tell me if you want to stop, okay?" You nod and he pushes himself slowly into you. You let out a squeak at the feeling and he chuckles at your reaction.
"You feel so good around nii-san's cock." Hajime says as he sinks the rest of his length into you. "God, how did we not do this earlier?" He moans in your ear, the sound of his voice making you clench around him.
"Is it alright if I move now?" You hear the impatience in his voice. Nodding, you lift your hand to his cheek. He smiles at the gesture and kisses your palm as he carefully thrusts his hips into you. You can't do anything but moan and quiver below him, too dazed to form a thought in your head.
"You're doing so good baby- Fuck... fuck, you feel so good." Koko rests his forehead against yours before kissing your lips. He swallows all your sounds, exploring your mouth with his tongue. He moans against your lips, moving his hips faster.
"Nii-san... Gonna cum..." You breathe out, feeling that familiar heat once again.
"That's good, baby. Come on, cum for me. Cum for nii-san." His thrusts get harder and deeper, making you cum for a second time tonight. Your cunt tightens around him as you climax, making him reach his own.
"Ah, fuck..." Hajime pulls out of you and with some strokes of his hand releases all over your stomach. He catches his breath for a second, admiring the masterpiece before his eyes. His sweet baby sister was now marked by him, and he'd never let anyone else touch you now that he's had a taste of you.
"Are you okay?" He asks. You nod, too tired to move your limbs. "I'm gonna get something to wipe that off, yeah? Koko walks to the closet and grabs a towel, then wets it a bit in the sink of your en-suite bathroom. He cleans his cum off your body. He thinks it looks so good on you, but right now you're looking so drained from the crazy day you had. Well, he can always do that again. Maybe take some pictures for his own enjoyment, too.
"Hajime-nii, this... This isn't normal." You say. What you just did definitely wasn't normal, yet it felt so good. "It's wrong."
"Wrong?" He lays down beside you. "Tell me something, baby, did it feel good?"
"Yeah, it felt good..." you say as you let him take you into his arms.
"Then there's nothing wrong with it. Nothing could possibly be wrong if it makes my sweet little sister feel good." His words make you blush. "Look at me baby" he holds your chin directing your gaze at his. "I took your first time, okay? I was your first. Not that man, not anyone else. It was me. Understand?" You nod.
"You took my first time, nii-san." He smiles at you, patting your head.
"That's my girl. Now go to sleep, you're really tired." Hajime lays your head on the pillow.
"Don't leave" You say.
"I'm not going anywhere, babygirl. Now sleep, I'll be right here when you wake up." Your brother lays by your side, putting his arm around you to run his hand trough your hair. "Sweet dreams."
#tw incest#tw dubcon#tw manipulation#tw prostitution#hajime kokonoi#tokyo revengers#tokyo revengers x reader
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Best In Show pt Four
Hawks is an attraction at an aquarium with reader as his new caretaker. Over the weeks Reader starts to notice he is not happy and plans to break him out, returning him to the sea.
The one night in your home you promised Hawks turned into a few months. The aquarium had been calling and calling trying to reach you since you were not showing up and you were under suspicion of taking Keigo out of his tank , you did leave the wagon there after all. It was a little hard to go out now since the police were looking for you. You had to cut your hair short and dye it a different color. Why were you still home? You could not eat into your savings forever. You woke up seeing the restroom floor and Keigo looking down at you from the tub , his arm hanging out to hold your hand. Slowly you sat up whining from the hard floor and leaned into the tub kissing the mermans cheek.
Keigo helped you sit comfortably and fixed your hair for you brushing it behind your ear , his voice was quiet and gentle but also full of concern. “How are you two doing?” He asked you looking down at the bump in your stomach.
At some point you had fallen pregnant , it was most likely the night you broke him out. You were three months along and everything was getting harder. You had put off leaving to be happy with Keigo , but at the same time you had to dodge the police and cell phone. You could not tell anyone.
“ we are.. good i think. Feels like a little guppy” you joked forcing yourself to stand up, your back screaming from it .
“ y/n.. please talk to me.” Keigo pushed himself up to touch your stomach . “We can't stay here, you can't sleep here every night it's bad for your back and our baby”
You lightly grabbed his fingers holding them, he was even more sad now. You could not keep him in your bath tub forever, you promised him the sea, not this .
“I know Keigo.. im just lost on what to do.”
Keigo hugged your stomach, sighing heavily. “I know, but if we stay any longer you'll be unable to get around like you do now.”
You ran your fingers through his golden hair thinking about the situation. You needed money for the beach cottage, for the baby.. food.. water.. “what if.. I sell the house. Then we go” Hawks blinked glancing up at you, he nodded once and you leaned down to kiss him.
••
It took maybe three weeks to get the house sold, you left all the furniture and only took clothes, blankets and all the bottled water in your fridge. Right after you sold the house you hurried to the bank to empty out your account and rush back home, stopping once along the way. When you arrived home you opened the trunk tying a rope to the back seat and dragging it behind you with a skateboard in your other hand.
Keigo was in the tub watching his tail hang out the other end. He loved being at your home with you but it had been so long since he swam around, jumped. You were truly a blessing for him, and now he was going to be a father. He heard the restroom door open and saw you staring at him.
“Okay, lets go, Keigo.” You set the skateboard down and the rope.
Keigo fell out of the tub dragging himself onto the skateboard and grabbing the rope. “Y/n..”
“We have to be quick, i moved my car up to the door so you don't have to worry about being seen.”
Keigo did not say anything, instead he tugged the rope and pulled himself through your house to the trunk of your car. You followed close by taking one last look at the bathtub. You had to pour water on Keigo every few minutes until he pulled himself into the car. He was greeted by 20 gallons of water and a waterproof dog bed. He gave you a look and you put the rope and the skateboard in with him. “ it was cute.” He chuckled and you closed the trunk getting in your car.
••
The ride would take two hours and you already bought the cottage, it was half furnished. Only a bed and basic needs but you did not need much else. You could see Keigo's hair in the rearview mirror and everytime he dumped water on himself. It was quiet for awhile.
“...do you have any names?” You asked him, turning the radio down.
“Azrith..”
“That's a lovely name..”
“Y/n. “
“I don't regret doing this, Keigo. Not one bit.”
“You sure?”
“ i promise.”
“How much longer?”
“Half hour. Almost home.”
“Are you doing okay?”
You looked in the mirror to see him , his chin resting on the seat .
“I'm doing okay. Promise”
“What are we going to do if the money runs out?”
“No one knows me in this city, and there's a small little farmers market I can drive to every week for food. I can get a job there , i was thinking of buying a laptop to work from home.”
He smiled, shaking his tail. “Thought of everything”
You couldn't help but giggle. “Yes, I have.”
The ride was soon over and Keigo looked out the window at the tiny cottage. It was a light pink and right on the water just like you said . A small white fence around the front with a beach in the back along with a deck connected to a small part of the house.
“We're home.” You said parking and looking back at him.
••
First thing you did was open the trunk and set everything up, thankfully you did because Keigo was out of water and looking dreary.
“Why didint you say anything?”
“I was nervous about you having to go into stores.”
You kissed him . “We dont have to worry about that now. “ you grabbed the skateboard putting it down and tossed the rope to the beach. “Cmon Keigo”
He grabbed hold of you falling lightly onto the skateboard and grabbing the rope. He pulled himself towards the beach with excitement all over his face. The water, the sand, the smell.. so cloose.
You followed him till he ditched the skateboard, his hands digging into the hot sand as he pulled himself, his tail slapping around. The second he felt a wave hit his fingers he jumped up and into the water.
“Keigo…?” You scanned all around the water for him. He splashed you and you saw him swimming around and jumping out of the water.
“The sea!!!!” He jumped again.
Tears fell from your eyes as you sat down in the shallows watching .
Keigo swam to you hugging you tight and kissing you. “Y/n..” his hand fell to your stomach and you kissed him back placing your hand over his.
“We are home.” You whispered, relieved.
•
@redflannel
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Beyond the Mat, sort of meta?
Ok so for some personal context, I’ve been rewatching all of Supernatural and i have the firm intention to keep the show on repeat on my computer/tv until i’ve fully binged it 15 times (never fear, I am already perfectly aware of how bad a decision this is). I wrote this post with a frantic need to get all the thoughts out, but it happened to be 3am at the time, and I realized I had to make gifs and upload them which was obviously too much work for a sleep deprived brain. I put it off until the next day, but ended up procrastinating and now it's been sitting in my drafts for 3 months and I thought hey this is a good time to finish it up (it could be argued that i'm polishing up this thing at 5am and this doesn't seem to be an issue for my will to get this done this time around, although I am heavily caffeinated so maybe that has something to do with it, go figure).
Anyways that’s besides the point. At the time I had just gotten to 11x15, Beyond the Mat. I’ve seen people write a lot about how parallels between Sam and Dean’s love lives/interests are part of the subtext about Dean’s bisexuality. I’ve also read people's works about how Gunner is pretty obviously one of Dean’s youth celebrity crushes. But (and I might just be a bit blind or haven’t looked hard enough) I haven’t seen a lot about the parallel between Sam/Rio and Dean/Gunner.
So let's get down to business, shall we?
The scene I will be focusing on starts out with Dean utterly star struck, sort of mumbling awkwardly his reasoning for coming up to Gunner (x) (x). Interestingly enough, Sam does the exact same thing with Rio (x) (x), while Dean is in the other corner clasping Gunner's hand for way too long and way too tight, and giving him the “i’ve loved you ever since i met you” look (x) (x).
Now since Sam’s crush is strictly heterosexual and we all know Sam’s interest in women, he outright says it to Rio (this is, after all, the CW) (x) (x). Dean on the other hand doesn’t verbalize it in so many words (the CW), but cmon... That fluster when Gunner winks at him later on?? (x) (let's not forget the little leg pat (x) that is probably still etched in Dean's memory amongst the 20 best things that ever happened to him, behind the previously-mentioned-wink and the Cartwright Twins) Or his reaction to Gunner patting his arm, "ok ok don't panic, it's not like your childhood crush just touched you oh wait". And Literally His Unwavering Smile The Whole Way Through. Jacting choices, people, Jacting choices (x).
Sam saves himself by steering the conversation towards a type of "where are they now?" interview, and Rio follows his not-so-subtle attempt, with a heavily implied tint of nostalgia for the good old days (x). Dean pulls a very similar stunt, mentioning something about his and Gunner's past (x) (x). Rio and Gunner's faces in those clips resemble each other quite a great deal: the emotion is the same, regret.
I really love that parallel because it’s really just “in your face”. You see Dean getting all flustered, at that point you could still say “hey i love [insert celebrity] and i don’t have a crush on them, but i’d probably still react that way around them”. (First of all, if I were you, I'd go on a journey of soul searching because hello, it’s ok to have crushes on celebrities you wish you didn’t, we’ve all been 12 and we’ve all seen Twilight and we’re all ashamed, and second of all, would you really and I mean really react that same way?) But then, enters Sam and his old crush, from the same field, basically the same time period, the same place and roughly the same "community". And it’s an unapologetic crush, not just a “hhhahaha i loved your uh.... your work.... as a uh kid haha.....”. Nonono. He says it, he tells her that he “used” (i’m not sure it’s completely gone, just like Dean) to have a crush on her. And then boom, parallel.
The way the two interact with both “celebrities” isn’t that different, if anything, Sam is less awkward around Rio than Dean is with Gunner. I’m betting the reason why is that since Sam’s crush is a woman, he has 1: talked about it openly before with his family (a poster of your crush on your wall is a good way to do that) and 2: talked to other crushes like her before. Dean, for obvious reasons, has not. Not a man, maybe some girlfriends, but he was never open (specifically not to John) about a potential crush he had on the big wrestler man in the ring, because he’s supposed to be this manly manly ladies man. He’s much more awkward because he hasn’t had much of an opportunity to talk to his crushes that might have been men, so the entire ordeal is wayyy more foreign to him. And he was also just a fan, so the whole “oh my god oh my god” of the crush is added to the already existing “oh my god oh my god” of his inner (and outer let's not kid ourselves) fanboy self.
Dean’s reaction is incidentally very similar to the one he has in the Fat Spa in 9x13, The Purge, with the character called Larry, Maritza’s husband. Dean’s awkward, goes too far, slightly flustered, and he’s pretty clearly not thrown off because of Maritza in that interview room, his gaze is mostly going from Sam to Larry then back to Sam. He lightly brushes over Maritza but barely looks at her (x) (x).
I’d also like to point out that when Gunner enters the stage, there’s a hint at a bi flag created by the light show, blink and you'll miss it (x). But then again that could just be the fact that those lights look pretty together and I'm completely insane. I’m not going to push that one too far, but since Gunner winks at Dean after that, which as I said before, makes Dean look adorably happy and flustered..... Take that as you will.
There's a thousand other scenes relevant to Dean being very blatantly bi-coded in Beyond the Mat (seriously, it's almost as obvious as the siren episode) but I really just wanted to focus on the parallel this time. I might go even more in depth on that episode (or do it bit by bit) if I ever find the will to make more gifs and string intelligible words together to create coherent sentences, and give off the impression of a sane mind. Might even throw in some The Purge meta for fun. Yes my definition of fun is quite warped.
#this took much too long#i'm just so bad at gifs and my wifi doesn't help#uploading takes hours#anyways imma shut up now#i've talked far too much already#spn meta#spn 11x15#beyond the mat#spn 9x13#spn analysis#spn#supernatural#bidean#bi dean#dean#dean winchester
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A Change of Heart
It’s 20-BiTeen bitches!!! In celebration the girl in this fic is bi, like yours truly, cause representation matters and if you don’t like it block me. Anyways the anticipated Julian fic.
Oh yeees 😍 can you write a jealous Julian blurb ?♥️
Based off FACE by BROCKHAMPTON 🧡
Word Count: 2,179
She never though she’ll end up in the same position again. After how hard she had worked to convince herself that love wasn’t for her and that it was okay, she found herself stuck in the same spot as always. Wishing she hadn’t started anything to begin with.
(Y/N) had been seeing Julian for a couple of months now. Due to the amount of men and women that had broken her heart, she hated admitting the feelings he evoked in her. The deep connection they had formed was nothing she had felt before which exited her, but made her fearful of the unknown emotions. So she remained guarded and made their relationship as informal as possible. No titles. No commitments. Simply two people getting along and having casual sex.
What she didn’t expect was for her to be sitting in Julian’s kitchen at 2am debating whether to return to bed with the boy she was falling for or to gather her belongings as quickly as possible and walk away from him like she had done many times before. She always felt horrible after the latter, but it was the only thing she could think of doing whenever she laid wrapped up in his arms wondering how she was going to save herself the heartbreak this time.
The sudden hand on her waist startled her causing her to jump off the kitchen stool. Luckily, the familiar arms held her up saving her the pain and embarrassment of hitting the floor.
"What are you doing up right now?" He held her closer, his feathery hair brushing against her cheek.
"I um- I couldn't sleep" she sat back down turning in the seat to face him. His sleep clouded face and shirtless body stood illuminated by the dim light peaking in through the windows. "I have a headache and was wondering if you had pain killers. I thought they'll be in the kitchen, but I couldn't find them."
"They're in the bathroom angel. You should've asked me."
“I didn’t want to wake you.” Your gaze diverted away from him. Doing anything to avoid his eyes hoping he wouldn't see your watery ones.
"You okay?" He stepped closer, his fingers caressing your cheek as he lifted your chin. Silence followed his words. She wasn't. She was quickly realizing she was far from okay. Falling for someone who seemed too good for her. Unable to accept the possibly that he could be the one exception. Slowly slipping into a state she promised she would never come close to again.
"I'm just tired Julian." He starred into her eyes for a moment before nodding and reaching for her hand. She followed him back to his room, silently getting under the covers as he searched his bathroom cabinet for the pills. Julian returned with a glass of water and a crewneck sweatshirt too.
"You should put this on. Being cold is probably going to make it worse." You pulled on his soft sweater which happened to smell like his favorite cologne. The familiar scent worked to calm you down and soon enough your stress induced headache settled down. Not much later, you felt Julian's grip on your waist tightening. His arm pulling you close to his chest was becoming a routine whenever you slept over. He held on throughout the night up until the morning. Almost as if trying to make you stay forever.
The next morning, Julian was awakened by the sound of your feet shuffling around his room. He took a deep breath not wanting to open his eyes and see you rushing to leave him once again. His sad reality hit him at the feeling of the empty spot next to him on the bed. Hesitantly, he sat up catching your attention from across the room.
"Hey Julian." She looked caught off guard as she stumbled trying to step into her boots as quickly as possible. "I didn't think you'll be up this early." She looked tense. The quiet room heightened her uneasiness as Julian remained quiet simply gazing at her. It took a couple of minutes for Julian to break the dense silence eating away at both of them.
"Do you have to leave?" His voice was faint making her feel worse for trying to leave unnoticed once again. She turned around searching for her bag trying to avoid his stare. The truth was, she did have to leave. She had to leave before she did something she regretted. Running away from him temporarily allowed her to breathe. She felt like one more moment with him would reveal the inescapable fact she had been trying to avoid for months now; she was in love with him. She was afraid her brain would win over her heart and she'll break whatever relationship they had out of fear of being mistreated again. Julian had stood up now. His hair laid flat against his forehead and various purple marks scattered around his neck. "We could go get breakfast if you want. I would cook for you, but that wouldn't be really smart." He tried to ease the tension sensing your anxious state.
"I actually promised Rachel she could meet me at my place this morning." You turned around finding him closer to you than before. "I'm probably running late at this point." Your hands searched through your bag making sure you weren’t leaving anything behind. His hand reached forward lifting your chin while his other arm wrapped around your waist. Slowly, he leaned in, his lips just hoovering over yours. unable to resist the urge, you leaned forward pressing your lips to his. He pulled you closer, the kiss quickly escalating. After a minute that felt simultaneously like just a second and an eternity, he pulled back but remained close to you.
"Why cant you just stay? At least one time." He stood over you, his eyes trying to read the true emotions hiding behind yours. You stood quietly allowing yourself to lean into his touch. "You always leave (Y/N). I don't understand why." The frustration in his calm voice pulled at your heartstrings.
"Julian I have to go. I'm not doing this right now." You turned on your heel making your way out of his room and straight towards his front door. It was impossible to stop the tears as you walked outside towards your car. Knowing Julian wouldn't follow you, you remained inside your car taking deep breaths to calm your heavy breathing before starting the car on your way to your house.
"I don't know what to do Rachel!" You had been arguing with your best friend over your situation for over an hour at this point. It was all pointless. The conversation just kept going in circles.
"Just admit that you're in love with him and let him know! He wants you (Y/N). I don't understand how you can't see that." She sat on your couch nonchalantly causing your irritation to rise.
"You just don't understand Rachel. How many times did someone else seem to want me before? And how many times did that not end up with me crying over them to you?" You ran your hands through your hair in utter exasperation at the inability to do anything to help yourself. "I don't want to get hurt again. I promised this wouldn't happen to me again, Rachel."
"Just give him a chance (Y/N). He's Julian! Not some trashy guy I warned you about before. He's just as fucked over by the fact that you're not together yet as you are." Tears you thought you couldn't have anymore began to stream down your face again for what seemed like the hundredth time in just a couple hours. "Come here." You slowly walked to your best friend who sat waiting with open arms. You buried your face into her neck silently letting it all out. She knew how much this was hurting you even if you were the only one overthinking the situation. You sat with her for a couple minutes, her hand soothingly running up and down your back. The quiet moment was interrupted by the front door opening revealing a distressed Julian who just stared at the both of you. Quickly you wiped your tears standing up feeling the lump in your throat returning.
"Julian, what are you doing here?" The tension you felt before had returned, only this time it was worse. You saw Rachel shifting behind you probably just uncomfortable as you were.
"I wanted to talk to you. I didn't know I was intruding I'm sorry. I'll leave." His voice was higher than normal hinting that he was trying his hardest to hold back. You stayed quiet simply staring back at Julian who still stood in your living room despite his words.
"You're not intruding. I was about to go." Rachel broke the silence quickly grabbing her phone and walking out the house before you could stop her. Julian remained quiet even with Rachel gone which left you no other option but to start the inevitable conversation you had been dreading.
"What do you want to talk about Julian." You sat back down hoping he would follow.
"You know why I'm here (Y/N)." Tip toeing around the subject wasn't going to help either of you.
"Don't be ambiguous Julian. Please get to the point." He took a deep breath before unleashing everything he had been holding in.
“What are you waiting for?” His words instantly jab at your heart. “Do you just want to sleep around with me for eternity? Do you just want someone to not be alone?” You kept quiet knowing he had every right to complain. “What do you want us to be?” He turned his body towards you now hoping to get a response from you.
"It’s not that easy, Julian.” You knew that's not what he wanted to hear, but that was sadly the only thing you could come up with without completely breaking down.
“Do you even really want to be with me? Do you want to be with somebody else? Do you want to be with Rachel?” The comment instantly caused you to snap your head towards him.
“What are you talking about?” Out of everything he could have said this was the last thing you could've thought about.
“I just don’t understand what you want! We spend every second possible together. We talk about everything. And no matter how much closer I think I get to you, you always walk away. You walk back to her. And if that's what you want, then that's okay. Just tell me. Talk to me. Don't ignore whats going on.” You shook your head not knowing how to express every single thought that was currently running through your mind.
"Julian it is definitely not what you think. I don't want to be with Rachel. She's just my best friend and the only one I've been able to talk to about this whole mess. She's not part of it." You instantly shut down his suspicion moving on to the painful part. "And I don't blame you, okay? Not even I know what I want at this point." The tears unwillingly resurfaced. "I just want to be happy." You gave up all composure you had, immediately slumping forward dropping your face into your hands. Not two seconds passed before Julian was next to you holding you close to him.
"I'm sorry." You shook your head.
"No Julian. This isn't on you. It's on me. We're in this mess because I don't trust myself to be in a relationship again. Every time I try, everything goes wrong. I don't want that again." You finally looked up to see him. His eyes soft and empathetic. “You have no idea how many times I’ve been fucked over Julian. How many times I’ve been lied to.”
“I would never lie to you.” You smiled reaching for his hand, squeezing it softly.
"I know. And that's why I don't want to fuck this up for us." Julian pulled his hand back placing both of them on your shoulders now.
"Listen. I know people have treated you wrong, okay? I can see it. You’re hurt. You don’t trust that we'll work out. You don't believe I can love you. But you’re wrong this time, baby.” He smiled looking at you wishfully. "You're completely wrong."
“I’m being cautious Julian.” The more he spoke the less your argument seemed valid.
“You’re being cautious with the wrong person. I just want to love you." You sat up moving towards him now, his arms instantly on your waist pulling you onto his lap. He pressed kisses against your face as he held you tightly. You held his cheek, your fingers ghosting over the light stubble, as Julian moved forward capturing your lips in a gentle kiss.
"Good thing I already love you, Julian." You felt his lips forming a smile as you mumbled the words into the kiss.
"I know you do." He pressed his lips against yours once more. "Because I do too."
#pls pay attention to her i love this one#ALSO I CANT PUT THE PAGE BREAK UNTIL I GET MY LAPTOP TOMRW IM SORRY#julian brandt#bayer leverkusen#football imagine#julian brandt imagine#germany nt
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Let's Make a Deal
whumptober2023
day 20- you'll regret touching them
fandom- batman
TW- human trafficking mentioned
summary- Jason come across a captured Nightwing while meeting with a gang leader.
ao3
whumptober23 masterlist
The warehouse was drab and dirty as most warehouses are. And this one was busy with goons scurrying around, unloading the most recent shipment.
Jason had only barely started working with the bats and most gangs didn’t know that yet.
Tonight that was going to work to his advantage. Villains were much more likely to talk to someone they thought was also on the wrong side of the law. Which, come to think of it, since vigilantes were illegal they were also on the wrong side of the law. Whatever. Jason didn’t have time to delve into semantics.
Tonight he was here to get information. The group not only dealt in drugs but also in human trafficking. And as much as Jason wanted to put a bullet in every single one of them, the Bat’s rules be damned, they needed to know where the victims were being held.
He’d already spoken with the leader of this particular operation, and they’d arranged to meet after Jason conveyed interest in partnering up.
He’d only made it three steps into the warehouse before he froze. Dangling upside down from the center of the warehouse and tied up with so many ropes Jason could hardly see any of the suit beneath them, was Nightwing. His face was red from being upside down so long, and he had a cloth stuffed in his mouth.
He needed to get this over with fast. He didn’t know how long Nightiwng had been upside down, but even for an acrobat the increased blood pressure from hanging upside down for too long could be dangerous.
“Ah, Red Hood. I see you spotted our intruder.” said their leader who Jason remembered was named Dave. Seriously, if you were going to be an evil crime boss you could at least change your name to sound more intimidating.
“I saw. The bats causing you problems?”
“Just that one. And he won’t be a problem for much longer. I’m planning on including him at our next auction.
Behind his helmet, Jason’s jaw tensed and he could feel his eyes glowing green.
“Unless, of course, you’d be interested in purchasing him? I know you’ve also had problems with the bats. And I’d even give you a discount, since we’ll be doing business together.”
Jason walked over and crouched so he was in front of Nightwing's face. “How did you even manage to capture him?”
“We hadn’t, not at first. We’d actually managed to nab Robin. We had him locked up in the back room, but when we went to check on him we found this idiot helping him escape. One of my men fired at the kid, but this one stepped in the way.”
Now that Jason was looking, he saw the messily done bandage covering Nightwing’s right shoulder.
“And Robin?”
“Nightwing managed to hold us off while the kid escaped. It didn’t seem like he would at first, but the kid had a broken ankle and Nightwing told him to go. We managed to tase NIghtwing a few times after the kid left. My men may have gotten a little carried away, before I stepped in.”
Jason could feel his temper flaring. He wished he had already connected his helmet to the Batcomputer so that he could contact Oracle, see if they had eyes on Tim and get some backup over here. Because it was looking more and more likely that this warehouse would be full of bodies soon.
“And you aren’t afraid of the Bat coming?” Jason knew Batman was out of town, but hopefully this crew didn’t know that.
“Haven’t seen the Bat in a few days. And if he was coming he would've been here by know. Besides, we’ll be cleared out by morning.”
Jason stood. “Enough about vigilantes. I came here to talk business.”
“Of course, Red Hood, if you’ll follow me to my office.”
“I’m good here.” Jason said, looking and noting the position of all the men. There were only ten. Good.
“Err… I mean, sure. Here’s good. What is it that you want to know?”
“How many drug shipments do you get per month, who’s your seller and buyer. The basics.”
Dave chuckled nervously. “Well we get shipments of the drugs every week. And our living shipments are about once a month. But I’m afraid I can’t tell you our buyer.”
“If we’re going to be working together I need to be able to vet everyone myself.”
“But you’re just going to be providing security.”
Jason shifted and Dave backed up a step.
“But! As a show of good faith. I can show some of our merchandise and let you have first pick. Or do you just want to take the vigilante?”
Jason looked over at Nightwing. “Vigilantes are too much trouble. Where’s the rest of your…cargo?”
“We’ve got them all at dock 9 in the old Weisemer cannery. I can show you around tomorrow before the action.”
Finally, he had the information he came for.
“I don’t think that will be necessary.” Jason said before pulling out his gun.
“Now wait just a moment–” Dave started before Jason interrupted him with a bullet through his throat.
Turning he got off twelve more shots aiming for joints this time. No need to make the Bat too angry. When the last goon had crumpled, and Jason had walked around removing weapons and tying them up he walked up to Nightwing.
He made quick work of the ropes, and was soon lowering Nightwing to the ground. He removed the gag and cut through the rest of the ropes.
Dick hissed.
“Can you stand up?” Jason asked.
Dick sat up, grabbing his head. “I’m not sure. I’m really woozy.” he answered his voice raspy.
“Well, come on then.” Jason said, throwing Dick’s arm over his shoulder and helping him stand. “My bikes out front. Does your comm work?”
Dick shook his head. “It shorted out after all the tasing.”
Jason wished he had killed everyone.
“Are they…” Dick gestured to the goons.
“Only Dave is dead.”
“Dave?”
“Their leader.”
Dick sighed.
“You should be glad I restrained myself.” Jason said. He could feel himself tensing, waiting for a rebuke, for an argument.
Dick gave him a small smile. “Very impressive.”
“What, you aren’t going to lecture me?” Jason said, feeling wrongfooted. Dick was the Golden Boy, surely he’d get all righteous about how killing was wrong.
Dick didn’t answer for a moment. Then, “I’m not Batman. I won’t judge you when you’re trying. Besides…”
“Besides what?”
Dick shook his head. “Nevermind. You said you brought your bike?”
Jason paused. “Yeah. You’ll be riding up front. I don’t want to have to stop because you couldn’t hold on tight enough to keep from falling off.
Dick chuckled. “Sure.”
Once they had gotten situated on his motorcycle, Jason asked. “You want to go back to the manor?”
“Yes, I need to check on Tim. Actually, do you have a phone on you? I should call them, make sure he made it back and let them know they don’t need to send anyone.”
Jason handed over his phone.
“This is Nightwing.” Dick said the string of code words to confirm it was really him and that he was alright. “Is Robin there? Good. No, I’m fine. I’ll be at the manor soon. Alright.” Dick hung up and handed the phone back.
“All good?”
“Yeah, Robin made it back and they were trying to contact Bluebird to rescue me.”
“I guess I’ll get you back to the manor then.”
“Thank you, Hood.”
Jason was silent for a moment. “No problem.” Then he started his motorcycle and headed towards the cave.
#whumptober 2023#whumptober#no.2o#you'll regret touching them#batman#Jason todd#dick grayson#batman fanfic
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"How To Save A Life"
Step one, you say, "We need to talk."
He walks, you say, "Sit down. It's just a talk."
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
You begin to wonder why you came
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Let him know that you know best
'Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
Pray to God, he hears you
And I pray to God, he hears you
And where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life
How to save a life
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life:
1. Love
2. Listen
3. Breathe
4. Imagine
5. Let it go
6. Believe
7. Forgive
8. Hold still
9. Hold close
10. Amaze yourself
11. Remember
12. Make yourself secure
13. Make everyone secure
14. Take it back
15. Let it go
16. Dream
17. Fear
18. Talk to someone
19. Don't lie
20. Don't pretend
21. Trust yourself
22. Cry
23. Accept
24. Don't hurt yourself
25. Don't hurt anyone
26. Keep moving
27. Regret
28. Forget
29. Make peace
30. Make love
31. Banish wars
32. Banish hate
33. Be free
34. Feel free
35. Stand still
36. Don't be scared of death
37. Have faith
38. Admire
39. Stand strong
40. Surrender
41. Dance
42. Smile
43. Laugh
44. Break
45. Touch
46. Have secrets
47. Share secrets
48. Know secrets
49. Relieve
50. Don’t lie to yourself
51. Release
52. Run
53. Learn
54. Leave
55. Trust others
56. Question
57. Be kind
58. Keep your memories
59. Don’t forget
60. Kiss
61. Hug
62. Scream out
63. Be true
64. Admit
65. Live
66. Release the fear
67. Secure
68. Play
69. Miss
70. Have confidence
71. Giggle
72. Don't suffer
73. Fly
74. Discover
75. Live in love
76. Sing
77. Pray
78. Speak up
79. Let go
80. Wonder
81. Help
82. Trust
83. Understand
84. Stay
85. Happiness
86. Open up
87. Create
88. Try
89. Break free
90. Truth
91. Wait
92. Hold on
93. Why
94. "Mom"
95. "Dad"
96. "Family"
97. Pain!
98. Hate
99. Say goodbye
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Hello there can I request Kai with 20 and 11, maybe mafia au bc I saw the one you wrote and liked it a lot. Thank you in advance:)) ~ anon
This isn't continued for the previous one, I hope that's alright and thank you too x
jongin + mafia!au + "it's not funny." + "I can fuck you anytime, anywhere."
His hand grabs yours, yanking it away from his crotch before leaving to whisper in your ear, "We're fucking leaving."
You stand up from the table, taking this as your prompt to leave first - letting him follow behind once being excused from the business dinner. You had been so bored, all they wanted to talk about was murder and death plots - not much fun for a mafia leaders girlfriend.
"What the fuck was that?" he hisses, appearing outside of the restaurant a few moments later.
You only giggle in response, remembering just how funny it was to see his reactions to you touching him under the table. At first he was slightly shocked at your movements over his soon-to-be protruding bulge, but he soon became alarmed, frustrated at the likelihood of being caught.
"It's not funny." He growls, heading for the car, only waiting a matter of seconds for you to get into the back of the chauffeured Mercedes. He quickly signals the chauffeur to drive. "If you really want me that badly then let's fuck right now."
"No, we can't do it here! The drivers right there." you protest even as his arms fall around you, pulling you onto his lap.
"It doesn't matter." His teeth nip your neck, his hard-on pressing into your thigh after all of the earlier teasing, "I can fuck you anytime, anywhere."
You whine as your hands grip his firm shoulders, legs clenched around his hips as you grind yourself against him, feeling his intense throbbing even through his trousers. His hands pull up the bottom of your already short dress, exposing your pink thong and your ass as he continues to palm it. His lips attack your neck continuously, only stopping briefly to let out quiet but passionate moans against your skin.
"After tonight you'll regret all that fun you had earlier." He mutters, nails sinking into your ass as you moan in pleasure. "I'm going to teach you a lesson, baby."
One of his hands moves to your face, gripping your jaw firmly as he forces you to look into his eyes. You can see the sparks of desire and lust, knowing he's willing to do anything to you just for his own release, "Please do."
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