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morgaseus · 7 months

Note

I’ve encountered a few on AO3 but I too am desperate for more Gojo fics anywhere 😭 if you have any recommendations too please I beg give some to meee 😭😭

Ohhh yesss ive got quite a few! Also, please look out for the content warnings!

Series

Sincerely not by saintobios (arranged marriage, modern au) (read this yrs ago so i cant remember much but i do remember crying at 10 pm in the kitchen while reading this)

Sundered by tojikai (baby daddy gojo, modern au)( made me sob )

Kintsugi by NoahLaval (arranged marriage, enemies to lovers, gojo x oc) (I love this! made me cry a lot, like really..)

No Cure by Tawus (enemies to lovers, reader is a curse user)

Exposure therapy by seoafin (angst, reader is in the same year as sashisu, au where toji became a teacher, also a geto/reader, but shoko is the endgame)(you should check out their other works too!)

Monster Hospital by mushmoon12 (enemies/rivals to lovers, lots of smut)

intrinsic warmth by thatdesklamp (angst, childhood friends to lovers)(yeah...)

Cursed Love by maespaces (angst, reader is a not a jujutsu sorcerer )(i forgot to add this!😭😭😭 but srsly tho rllylove this one, vry well written! im still reading it but u can tell ure in for a bumpy ride🥹)

Oneshots

Grey Cashmere by vagabond-umlaut (angst with a happy end, set during hidden inventory, reader is in the same year as sashisu)(one of my all time faves!!! its also part of a series but can be read as a standalone!)

an unwanted letter by piichuu (angst, post ch 236?ig?)(i read this during class... i just hope my classmates didnt see me cry)

Others. (I have not read this yet but ive been keeping an eye on it! Thought i might share as well)

Infidelity by tawus (angst, gojo and reader are married)

one day, three autumns by vagabond-umlaut (arranged marriage)

Minazuki by quirklessidiot (enemies to lovers, arranged marriage)

Devoted by aerinth (angst, friends to lovers)(also a geto/reader)

the color yellow by rhydonium (angst, hanahaki disease)(also a geto/reader)

Bonus!

Abalone on the shore by unolvrs (I dont rlly read much toji fics but this one made me sob on a morning! You'll need tissues for this one ig...😞)

#i wrote this one at 4 am so if theres anything wrong with the links pls do tell!#theres actually a lot more but i forgot some of the tittle.... :(#can u tell that i love arranged marriage with gojo? lmaooo #writing this instead of writing my essay...#fic recs #gojo x reader #yuna.incs #angst lots of angst #only listed enemies/rivals/lovers and angsts here

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friedwizardwhispers · 6 months

Video

youtube

From Protagonist to Romantic Prop: Mina Murray's Transformation

#youtube #dracula daily #justice for mina murray harker #mina harker #mina murray #video essay recs #the things we've been saying since last year about Mina and Dracula #she is right and she should say it

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pixelchills · 10 days

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Chill's ramblings about the DCA fandom and personal feelings and issues towards TSAMS (both positive an negative):

(I'm writing this like an essay but treating it like a diary, so if I jump from subject to another, it is because I am just typing as the thoughts hit my head. Sorry for being so wordy.)

I simply feel like I need to write my thoughts down, so why not share them with you. Maybe you can validate my feelings or something, I don't know.

Intro:

So, oof, I got a fic rec from @thedenofravenpuff and I'm loving it so much I really wanna draw fan art for it...

But the problem is that it's a TSAMS fanfic and I've sworn to my name I'll never draw anything related to the show because that will make me engage with a part of the fandom I'm not comfortable with.

My biggest issue with TSAMS:

I have such complicated feelings towards the show and its fanbase and I do not wish to make my life and work more difficult because of it as it already is.

My own work and characters are already constantly being compared to TSAMS. When I first introduced Solar to my fic, he was constantly being referred to Eclipse from TSAMS. Now that the show had a character with THE SAME NAME, it has been even worse.

Dolldrop Moon has been compared to Lunar. Even though the dolldrops existed before the youtube channel was even created (and Lunar made his debut much later).

The biggest issue I've had has always been the fanbase, that takes the show as the canon for Sun and Moon from FNAF and uses it as an excuse to harass shippers like me because they think Sun and Moon are brothers.

I've first handedly seen the damage the fanbase has done to some of my friends who draw, or have previously drawn art for the show besides their own AUs and personal headcanons of Sun and Moon as lovers. I'm sorry to tag you, but @kriimhild and @fablekitty : I've seen how the immature side of the show's fans have treated you, I am so terribly sorry you've had to defend yourselves over and over again for things that were not meant to be mixed up.

I have posted some ideas of a possible Animutant Moon and Sun forming a polyamorous relationship with Solar in the future of "My Dear Daffodil" on my personal/adult Twitter account. Someone kept commenting on my posts that I was glorifying incest, because Sun and Moon were brothers and Solar was their cousin.

The post had "Animutant" in it. Not "TSAMS". These comments came from a person saying they were 19 in their profile. So it's not just kids who can't tell not every fanwork is about TSAMS. It's starting to be some adults too.

Vice versa I've had another person comment on my very clearly SFW Twitter how they're following me because I am an adult artist who draws TSAMS incest. I have never drawn TSAMS art. I ship Sun and Moon, but they're never related with family bond, because I love presenting them as lovers.

Why I ship Sun and Moon:

Because I am a hopeless romantic. I love romantic love. Every single story I write is always about love.

The only exception to this is the Poppy Playtime comic I am doing. But even then, I was originally planning for a romantic love between Dogday and the Player. Yet, I decided to leave it, and keep the relationship open for any type of representation the reader themselves will prefer.

I used to watch The Sun and Moon Show when it first started airing. I loved their playthroughs. I had a big distaste for them calling each other brothers, as well as some of the first "lore" videos they had. My biggest issue at the time was how Moon treated Sun, though. As someone who grew up with an abusive sibling, it sometimes just hit a bit too hard at home.

But it got better after Eclipse and Lunar appeared. Moon was more caring, and I started to really like his character development. There was one episode where Sun explained to Lunar that he and Moon had simply just "decided" to be brothers, despite not having a canonical relationship.

This actually made me really happy. Because the Old Moon was aroace, the love he felt was simply never meant to be romantic, but platonic. And by making Sun his brother by choice clearly indicated that Sun was always the one he loved the most - in a way that was suitable for aromantic person like him.

And it really made me enjoy the show for a while. Sun is my favourite character, and despite not always liking the way the show presents him, I always feel so much love for him, no matter the AU he is in. So I loved that Moon loved him more than anything, even if it was just platonic. Because I've always been under the impression that the canon Moon loves Sun, and is only under a virus to protect him. For me, the best part of any Sun and Moon AU is to know that Sun is the most important thing to Moon.

Why I stopped watching TSAMS:

And then that Moon I had really started to like, who loved Sun more than anyone else but just platonically, died.

It hurt so much I simply stopped watching the show. I've watched a few episodes here and there after that, but I am having a hard time liking the show the same as I did before.

Partially it's because of the fanbase. Partially it's because I don't find the lore very interesting and some of the stuff a bit repetitive. Partially it's because I am scared to see Sun eventually crumble up into madness, because he has been through so much.

I like the New Moon. He is funny and nice, what I've seen. His relationship with Solar has been interesting, and I genuinely hoped they would've been able to take the romantic route after Moon said he wasn't sure if he was aroace anymore. But as I said, I've only watched a few episodes after the old Moon died, so I don't know either of their characters that much to form any strong opinions about them. I just listen to the Monty and Puppet podcast once in a while and get a little inside to some of the lore that has been happening.

But hey, at least there's fanfics. Which is why I am rambling here today.

Fanfics:

It is a rare treat to find Sun x Moon fanfics that aren't simply just porn, or do not include reader inserts. So since my romance-filled brain needed something to fill the void, I've started reading some TSAMS fics with romance (that wasn't between Sun & Moon) and plot in them.

I know Solar was settled to be a "cousin" to the weird family tree of TSAMS. But I simply crave for Solar and New Moon to be at least queerplatonic. Solar is not from their dimension, no matter how much they decide they're 'cousins' it doesn't make him their real cousin or relative because they're not from the same world.

Sun and Moon are brothers but they technically gave birth to Eclipse, who then created Lunar so Eclipse is technically Lunar's parent and then brother and Lunar is Sun and Moon's brother and... do you see what I'm trying to say?

The family tree is so complicated that I don't think I'm a horrible person for shipping Moon and Solar and reading fics about them. Tell me if I am wrong though.

The FIC that is making me question everything:

So Puffy recommended this fic by @theinfamousdoctorf , "Eclipse Meets His Match".

I'm currently on chapter 40, and I am genuinely surprised how much I am liking this fic so far. It got everything; redemption and character growth, the representation of Sun as the good, glowing angel he is in my mind (for canon, and every AU. He is always perfect in my eyes I love him can you tell lol), slow-burn romance, drama, excitment, plot, jokes and funny moments... even if there are a lot of mentions of sex and sexual pleasure, it doesn't feel out of the place as there is so much more to it too.

Eclipse's redemption to become better and realising he is in love with Sun has been so interesting to follow. Sun deserves the love. I love when Sun is getting loved. I literally ship him with every other animatronic in the games and love it when people ship him with their self-inserts and OCs. Because I love him so much I want him to be loved in every possible universe he is in.

Even bigger bonus to this fic is the second pairing, Solar and Moon, which I already opened up about above. I don't know how much the fic is truthful to the canon lore of the show, but I wish to pretend this fic is the canon now /hj.

I love the characters and how they're written. I love the descriptions of their flaws and hopes and dreams. How vulnerable they can get. How closely they stick together. And as an appreciation for making me tearful and excited about fanfiction in such a long time, I would hope to be able to gift the author some fan art for their fic.

But I've sworn to not draw anything for the show. For my own good. I've got too many awful comments already from the fans of the show despite never doing any art for it. I am just scared it will turn things worse.

End words:

I don't know if creating a new alias would be the right choice. So my main name/account would be spared from the confusion that the show's fans seem to stirr into, where one tsams artwork turns all of the artist' work into tsams.

I don't care if the art style would be recognisible. The artist would be me, but not PixelChills. Just so I could gift something to the author of this fic that is currently saving me from the boredom of being unable to write my own.

Thank you.

(This text has been typed on my phone, so pardon for any typos).

-Chill

#pixel talks #rambles #tsams #fic rec #essay #sorry my head is simply just confused

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vinelark · 4 months

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in return for the fic recs i got last month, here are a few fics i read recently that i want to absolutely yell about from the rooftops:

Iron, Fire, Mirror-Glass by PurpleSoot: an early batman days AU where, while slowly healing from a spine-shattering injury, bruce finds an old book about the fae. in a fit of desperation he attempts a Summoning to try to heal his spine. enter: robin.

this story is fantastic—the kind of longfic with a plot so good and satisfying that finishing it leaves you on a reading high for at least a week. one of the best early days bruce fics i’ve ever read, with honorable mentions to excellent alfred and clark and jim and selina characterizations—but robin (dick) really takes the cake here. the balance of chilling, otherworldly, not-quite-human vs. playful, earnest, Still Just a Child…chef’s kiss. the way robin’s character arc drags bruce kicking and screaming through his own emotional growth is so well-paced and well-wrought that i already want to reread just so i can experience it again. this is one of those god-tier longfics that i can’t believe i got to read for free on the internet.

mid-reading testimonial:

The Lone Ranger Never Had to Deal with Bruce Wayne by @theskeptileptic: a tim-joins-the-family-early fic in which tim decides to do everyone (his parents) a solid by faking his own death and running away to canada, except his weirdo neighbor bruce wayne keeps butting in and messing up his plans.

this is one of the rare stories where tim doesn’t know batman’s identity yet, and even rarer stories where that somehow makes the whole thing even more compelling. this fic has two of my favorite things: small, lonely, moderately unhinged tim drake pov, and really good pangs—pangs that are expertly teased out through flashbacks that add context to the present action at exactly the right moments. also, a very fun cameo near the end. i had a blast reading this one, physically clutched my chest more than once, and am already looking forward to rereading.

mid-reading testimonial (feat. @cairoscene):

equivalent exchange by scribblemetimbers (wip): an au set during tim’s robin days in which tim discovers 1) crossroads demons are a thing and 2) people can make deals with them. deals that include bringing people back from the dead, so long as you’re willing to pay the price with your own life.

this fic is so…🤌‼️ it feels like everything i want in a fic so far, down to two incredibly specific concepts i love (bruce, in his grief, saying something harsh to robin!tim with disastrous consequences later + tim making a big secret sacrifice gambit) which are both done so so well, within a larger plot that is also done so so well. the way this fic cuts in and out of scenes at the exact right moments for max tension feels like a masterclass in causing me to tear my hair out (in the best way), and instead of assorted pangs reading it is just one big Pang. it currently leaves off on an agonizing cliffhanger but, again, in the best way. highly recommend. (thank you again @owlbats for the rec!)

exchange between me and my friend after i sent the link, which about sums it up:

and to cut this angst with some humor:

IRIS Log #1548 by @deadchannelradio: a night on patrol as recorded by the bats’ audio logs, centering around red hood getting flung into a ditch and everyone, eventually, getting home safe.

one of the top ten funniest things i’ve ever read—spiritually up there with send to all (and if you’ve seen my fic rec tag you’ll know what a compliment that is). this makes use of the audio log format SO well. the dialogue shines, the jokes land with excellent timing, and it moves at such a clip that it’s pretty much impossible to stop reading once you’ve started. every character shines in this, and i’ve randomly choked on laughter remembering the phrase ‘good god he got thrown like a corn hole beanbag’ like twenty times in the past few weeks.

mid-reading testimonial:

#every time i sit down to do a general reclist it gets so long and i get overwhelmed because i want to write an essay for each one #i had a rec thread going on twitter for a while and it was also getting so long even though i stopped months ago #i should do these monthly. there are so many fics i would love to yell from the rooftops about #anyway these rock!! happy reading!!!#batfam #fic rec

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somerabbitholes · 2 years

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book recs masterpost

an ever-updating masterpost of books i've recommended. please check these before you ask for recommendations in case they've been covered —

fiction

"the tragedy still happened, but it was important that the love was there"

japanese literature

korean literature [1], [2]

gothic writing

spooky adult horror gothic

some favourites

marathi books

some ruskin bond

indian fiction [1], [2], historical fiction, stories, [3], [4]

non-fiction

general assorted ones i like

some favourites

about people living through crises

on geopolitics, foreign policy, international affairs

on political philsophy

vaguely sociology

biographies

on economic history

on the silk route

on prisons, convict labour

on afghanistan, soviet invasion, terror

capitalism

on language and linguistics

on the ancient and prehistoric world

just a bunch on india

the indus valley

indian aestheticism, art

gupta empire

sangam literature

on the northeast

india and southeast asia

nur jahan, mughal women | more

islamic conquest and state-making

on kashmir

assorted nonfiction

colonisation and aftereffects

on nationalism

on cities

on mumbai

on bollywood in bombay

on cities

on delhi

on kolkata

essays

history, migration, labour

art, reading, travel, gender, sports

nature, climate, some history

political economy, environmental and urban history, cartography and space

my comfort books

light reading

books that have got me out of my slumps

on art, photography, aesthetics, design [1], [2], [3]

on the environment

just some story and essay collections

#booklr #masterpost #book recs #book blog #reading list #reading #essays #literature #academia #faq #gaaaandaaaalf #book list #historyblr

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ambrosiagourmet · 13 days

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I truly truly cannot recommend this essay on Laios and Marcille enough.

It’s a lovely journey through the flashback to their first meeting and the succubus scenes that follow, all the way to the final confrontation with the Lion and the people they become by the end of the story (and how they help each other reach that end). Give it a read (and maybe leave a kudos or a nice comment) if you haven’t checked it out yet!

#fic rec #kinda. essay rec really. but it’s on ao3 #also I checked best I could and didn’t find this cross posted but if the OP sees this and at all wants me to take it down #or has a post of their own to boost #lmk!!! <3

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thisbuildinghasfeelings · 3 months

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Missing Moments I Want to Know About in 1x09/1x10

The show leaves us to fill in a lot of blanks for TK and Carlos during season 1. I always want to know more, but I think the blanks I want filled in most are the ones that occur in 1x09 and 1x10. Here are the ones I think about the most:

1.How does Carlos find out that TK is awake?

Does he find out through the first responder grapevine that the firefighter who was shot is going to be ok? Does someone from the 126 (Paul maybe?) call him? Does TK call or text him himself?

If I had to guess, I'd go with Paul letting Carlos know. Maybe before Carlos leaves the hospital he gives Paul his number and asks him to update him if anything happens.

2. What is TK told about Carlos after he wakes up and how does he feel about it?

We see TK's reaction to Owen asking about how long he's "been seeing the cop," but we don't see any further than that. I think TK can assume from Owen's comment that Carlos was at the hospital...otherwise how would Owen know about them? But does anyone say anything more to TK? Does Owen/Paul/Marjan/Mateo/Judd mention how upset and worried Carlos was or ask TK if he wants them to call Carlos to let him know he's ok? How does TK feel once it sinks in that Carlos, his "boyfriend who he doesn't even really know is his boyfriend boyfriend" was sitting by his hospital bed?

I see TK in this post-coma moment as being very much in crisis, and not just about the question of his relationship with Carlos. TK feels lost and confused about where his place is and what he wants to do with his life. I like to believe (though we don't actually have much evidence of this since there's no Tarlos interaction between 1x05 and 1x10) that TK was starting to come around and let his walls down a bit more in the time leading up to him getting shot, but then, post-coma, his crisis makes him take a step back from all that until he figures out where he's supposed to be. I think TK probably felt things when he found out that Carlos sat by his hospital bed, but I think he shoved those feelings down while he dealt with the crisis at hand.

3. What led them to the juice bar in 1x10 and how did they both see the situation at the time?

Whose idea was it to go there? Did TK call or text Carlos or was it the other way around? Had they been texting or talking back and forth at all since TK woke up or was this their first contact? What was said in the conversation that led them there? What were their expectations?

TK seems to be the one most passionate about boba so that makes me think he chose where to go. Or maybe it was a place they were planning on going together before he got shot, like TK had mentioned it in passing weeks ago and Carlos remembered and suggested that as the place they could go.

I wonder if TK thought from the beginning that he'd be essentially breaking things off with Carlos. Perhaps that perceived inevitability was why he filibustered a solid 6 minutes on boba? I get the impression that they both knew there would be a conversation about their relationship because when Carlos brought up the "elephant in the juice bar," TK immediately knew what he meant. Also, in hindsight, it is HILARIOUS that Carlos calls TK out here for avoiding talking about something. Oh, Carlos.

Side note: I wonder what Carlos' reaction would have been if TK had said that he liked Carlos and wanted to continue hooking up but still didn't want anything more. Would Carlos have said that wouldn't work for him? Because I really think at that point it wouldn't have. After the strong feelings he felt while sitting beside TK's hospital bed, could Carlos have continued being casual? Or would he have agreed to it just to keep TK (HIS SOULMATE) in his life even if it would have caused him pain?

4. What happened between the juice bar and the firehouse hug?

I feel like it's obvious that we're missing a pretty big conversation in there. The best evidence for this is the way Carlos goes face first into TK's neck when he shows up at the firehouse. That is not a man who isn't sure if they're even a "we" or who is solemnly accepting that they might not be meant to be. So what happened?? There's some great fic exploring this moment (SEE BELOW), which is where a majority of my headcanons on it come from.

I think it's clear that TK had to reach out first here. Both from Carlos' attitude at the end of the juice bar scene and from what we know about Carlos in general, there's no way Carlos was going to push any further without TK making it clear that's what he wanted. HOWEVER I could possibly see Carlos going to the hospital to check up on TK as he got his stitches fixed. I don't think he would go with any motive of getting TK to agree to a relationship with him. It would solely be about making sure that TK was alright. Even then, I'm not sure if he would do it. He certainly would have wanted to, but he might have held back based on TK's attitude at the juice bar. Carlos likely would have felt that TK might not want him there. I've definitely enjoyed fic that has him doing this, though.

Probably the most likely possibility is that Carlos simply went home after the juice bar/solar storm incident. His heart was surely shattered after being essentially rejected by his soulmate after putting his feelings out there in the most direct way he'd done so far. We know so much more about Carlos now and it just makes it even more apparent how much it took for him to sit there in front of TK and tell him how he was feeling like that when he thought it might not be reciprocated! And then, when it wasn't (at least from Carlos' perspective in that moment)...HEARTBREAKING.

Ultimately, I believe that TK had his epiphany and reached out to Carlos wherever he was (either at the hospital with him or Carlos' house or somewhere else). The conversation they had is something that I would like to see more than perhaps any missing moment in the entire series. Imagine the look on Carlos' face when he realizes what TK is telling him! As his previously-shattered heart is mended in an instant 😭 I want to see it so bad! Thankfully I have fic to fill the void. Speaking of, here are just a few excellent examples of fic that fills in this and some of the other moments I've discussed here:

silver in the night by @reyesstrand

the elephant in the juice bar by @taralaurel

Simple and Plain and Not Much to Ask from Somebody by @howtosingit

Steady up ahead by @paperstorm

Still Waters Run Deep by @welcometololaland

Just Let Me Hold You by tkstrands (is this writer on tumblr?? If so let me know and I'll @ them!!)

#don't mind me just writing a tarlos essay on a tuesday afternoon #911 lone star #911 lone star rewatch 2024 #lone star rewatch #also #FIC REC

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lantern-hill · 2 years

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september 2022 wrapup

articles

are you ready to be surveilled like a sex worker?

dirt: tiktok & suburban gothic

researchers gave thousands of dollars to homeless people. results defied stereotypes.

yeah, space tourism is ruining the ozone layer

the double standard of aging

i dabble in everything but can't commit to anything!

i am so extremely embarrassed by my entire life!

i can't stop thinking about him!

how to stop being obsessed

i keep daydreaming about a bigger life!

(been on an ask polly kick sorry not sorry)

books

white trash - nancy eisenberg (dnf)

the castle of otranto - horace walpole

the moomins & the great flood - tove jansson (5/5)

s.t.a.g.s. - mia bennett (1/5)

the shadows between us - tricia levenseller (dnf: atrocious.)

and i darken - kirsten white (gave up 77% through. simply could not do it anymore)

the shadow over innsmouth - hp lovecraft

the end of mr. y (dnf)

here - richard mcguire (4/5) graphic novel/art book about a place along the course of many many years. very creative format very fun to peruse casually or carefully.

the furies - katie lowe (3.5/5, would recommend!)

becoming a visible man - jamison green (still reading)

#essay recs #wrapup #book recs #poetry recs #org

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lizzydizzyyo · 18 days

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I think what's really compelling about House's absolute unwillingness to bow down to anything or anyone (the ethical board, the law, extra rich CEO, vindictive police officer, and even the patients themselves) regardless of how absolutely batshit and downright illegal his actions are, is because it's coming from a chronically disabled person, in more ways than one.

He cannot walk without agony or his cane. His chronic and severe pain led him down the path of deep Vicodin addiction until he also becomes psychologically dependent on it too (once, Dr Cuddy gives him saline placebo and it "works", in that he is not feeling his leg pain anymore for a few hours).

He understands it deeply just how desperate people can be when they're in pain and nobody can (or are willing to) help them—at least, so far, until they land on his doorstep. Which is canonically the most extreme step patients take when everything else fails—you don't just go straight to Plainsborough Teaching Hospital and to Dr Gregory House MD's office; you have to go through dozens of other doctors in various specialties and failed treatments too.

(Although that's a separate discussion about how doctors, particularly resident ones, are overworked and underpaid and redtaped by shithead insurance companies even if they do know how to treat a patient and want to).

He knows, from the bottom of his heart, that having such a painful and life-limitting debilitating condition is comparable to hell on earth, because he has one. He knows, that despite his disability being visible to everyone, yet no one wants to put an effort to help him deal with it—is also hell on earth.

Cuddy simply throws money at him and turns the other way to his Vicodin abuse, like she is saying, "I don't care if he takes 10 Vicodin pills a day or more, and I have to pay at least $1M every year for lawsuits, as long as he gets the job done," (and when they decide to go into relationship, she immediately drops him when he relapses, even if the reason for his relapse is her—although, yes, there is another discussion to be had about keeping yourself and your child(ren) safe being a priority compared to helping an addict, recovering or not). Wilson, as loyal as he is to House, simply either enables him or lectures him without going into the root of the issue and thoroughly help House that way. His subordinates, especially after the original trio, are simply too scared, too ignorant, or too ambitious to even approach the issue and choose to keep their job than help House (also another discussion to be had about how you can't help people who don't want to help themselves and so on).

So when he sees a patient who has gone through hell trying to get a correct diagnosis and treatment, he becomes laser-focused on doing everything under the sun to get to the bottom of it and cure the patient. He doesn't care if he has to break into countless of houses (haha pun) and collect insane and probably biohazard samples to do it—he absolutely will, no question.

Yes, hate-criming and being a bigot is his favorite hobby (still livid at the asexual ep and the production's choice for the resolution, let's just say I still have beef with Hugh Laurie and the entire production team for it), and so is insulting patients in so many ways that Shakespeare would personally fly to New Jersey and shake his hands if someone manage to successfully perform necromancy on ol' Billy boy. But House is no one if not dedicated. "Yes, my patient is an idiot, everyone is an idiot too, but I WILL cure their condition like my life depends on it," is basically his middle name.

Besides, you can make the argument that he is more compassionate than all the other doctors around him, because despite his absolute disdain towards some of his patients' beliefs and stupidity, he still works his ass off to treat them. He will call your god an idiot in 7 different languages while putting you in a diagnostic machine he manipulated the whole hospital into letting him use so that you could get a test which weren't available to you before. He will tell you that your currently-happy marriage will end in a bloody divorce and your ex will leave you penniless so love is not real while injecting you with a medication he had to hack the CDC's database for.

There are even episodes that show him being truly earnest, like the clinic duty scene where he is snarky as usual to a girl who seemingly stupidly had unprotected sex until she lashes out, and House is like, "Oh shit, this is above my paygrade", and immediately goes to Cuddy with a very serious expression and no sarcastic dilly-daliying, demanding her to transfer the patient to someone else because he is not good with "curing" rape case (interesting choice on the writers' part to make the patient insist to have therapy with House, though).

There is an episode about a very workaholic woman executive in a fashion company who has tremor and partial paralysis, and later on it's shown that she seems to tie her worth as a person to her corporate success while band-aiding her deep psychological issue like her suicidal ideation, and House genuinely asks her, "Do you want to live? I cannot help you unless you want me to," or something along the line.

There is also the cursed 9-year-old terminal brain cancer episode where Chase kissed the patient (ew), where at first it shows House being a usual misanthophe to Wilson and saying, "She is not brave, it's the brain tumor clot talking because it must be near the amygdala." Later in the episode, House sits near the patient alone, and compassionately asks her if she even wants to live, going through the rest of her short-lived but horrible agony, even if they catch the clot. The surgery to find and get rid of the clot is risky and can debilitate her even more, and this is why House is laying the decision to her hands. That she gets to choose. This is what truly reveals to him that she is genuinely brave (aside from the scan showing the clot to be so far away from her amygdala), but for the wrong reason. She is brave for her mom, willing to go through horrible surgery and drag out her already painful cancer-ridden life because, "My mom needs me". When everyone is congratulating her in the end, you can tell House has a bittersweet expression of both awe towards her bravery, and sadness that this 9-year-old sick girl has to bear the brunt of her horrible pain just so that her mother is not sad. That he couldn't convince her to be a child until the nearing end of her life.

The most interesting evidence of his compassion to me is the gunman hostage episode. It might sound weird because in the whole episode, he is depicted to first want to outsmart the gunman patient, then becomes laser-focused but only because he sees it as a puzzle, then absolutely selfish and dangerous because he volunteers himself as the last hostage and gives the gun back to the guy after the MRI. I do think it's true that his dedication to solving patients-are-just-puzzle-to-me conditions shines through in the episode, especially the scene of him returning his gun, but there is something else I catch when I rewatched it before.

When the gunman patient is put in the MRI because Cameron tells him a theory through the hostage call, the remaining doctors in the room including House are wary at the gunman but also hopeful. Yet, when the result shows up on the screen, he realizes that the theory is wrong and the guy let go his only bargaining chip for nothing. If you watch this part carefully, you'll notice that House actually looks pitying and sad at the gunman's disappointed demeanor and expression. He realizes he is going to be another notch in the guy's failed doctors list, and at this point (with the gun given away and even the best, most talented doctor also not finding out what's wrong with him), the guy has given up hope that he will ever see the day he will be cured, certainly not behind the bars.

Yes, his thirst for puzzle is House's big driving force in giving back the gun, but you'll be lying to yourself if you don't notice House's compassion for the guy because he doesn't want the guy to go out empty-handed, with absolutely no more hope because House knows once they step out of the door, this guy will never, ever be allowed to be in the vicinity of any hospital or doctor ever again in his life, aside from jail's bare-minimum exams and medications. House can't handle the thought of putting someone else through his own disappointment—that nothing works to help his leg pain. He especially doesn't want to be the cause for this gunman guy's case either. Even in the end when House realizes the guy is a fucking moron because he doesn't know that Florida is, in fact, in earthwide-horizontal tropical zone and this is what stumps most of the guy's previous doctors—House still gives him a subtle salute to the guy while being handcuffed and led away, almost to say, "Enjoy your healing and the defeat of your arch nemesis The Sickness™, glad to be part of it."

Majority of his drive to stop at nothing until his patient is cured is definitely thanks to his own fucked-up leg, even if there are some dialogues with Cuddy and Stacy Warner (House's ex wife) that seem to imply he has always been a misanthrophe whose hobby is getting into malpractice (or general) lawsuits. I wholeheartedly believe that after his leg clot rendered him disabled and with chronic pain, he became much more dedicated and obsessed with getting to the bottom of a patient's medical information, even for info that seems innocuous or irrelevant that always turn out to be important (probably more like a plot armor than established characterization, to be honest), almost like this is his method of relating to the patients in his own weirdly human way, and maybe a little bit (actually, a lot) of projecting.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

#house md #rec #media analysis #writing #english #me #i hv more to say abt this show like him making the mistake of not amputating his leg bc of his bias against (particularly visible)disabilit #even tho cuddy and his other past ortho surgeons suggest against keeping the leg because the clot is really bad and unsalvagable #years later even while having his leg it's now useless because all it gives him is pain and anger issue with a dash of opioid addiction #so when he sees patient being stupid or refusing a certain test/treatment he KNOWS in the bottom of his heart to be right #he just won't take it lying down & he will drag his patients kicking & screaming bc ''trust me i was an idiot too don't repeat my mistake''#but that's an essay for another day #whump #whump meta #disability

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isagrimorie · 5 months

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The History of Farscape: From the Henson Company's Vision to Cult Classic

This is such a great show, a cult classic that deserves to be more popular.

#farscape #vid rec #video essay #Youtube

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phin-tastic · 9 months

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i cannot describe the rage i feel when i click on a fight club deep dive youtube essay, and it’s just… some dude, talking about how this film is the purest portrayal of masculinity and how “men love it because it’s so relatable”.

i mean, i love it because it’s relatable. but not in the way those sigma film bros do.

i love it because i’m gay, hate capitalism and would like to recreationally get beat up.

#why must i always get betrayed #the titles always sound so promising #and then they just spout this unreflected bs #like… don’t you know what satire is? ☹️#if y’all have video essay recs that aren’t dumb men talking stupid send them my way pls #i started watching a german one today and couldn’t make it thru the first 3 minutes #how do they misinterpret everything????#fight club #the narrator #tyler durden

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just-late-roman-republic-things · 10 days

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Review: Caesar: Life of a Colossus by Adrian Goldsworthy

This biography of Caesar is an excellent starting point. Goldsworthy is quite reliable on the facts, cites his sources often without getting overly dense, and is usually very good at pointing out gaps and ambiguity in our evidence. He also doesn't fall prey to the common fallacy of assuming Caesar's career and the end of the republic were inevitable.

I do disagree with a few of his interpretations. I think he overstates Cato's commitment to Stoicism, Brutus' nobility of character, Caesar's popularity with the common people in early 44 BCE, and the likelihood of Caesar getting prosecuted in 50 BCE if he'd laid down his imperium. (See my previous post on the "prosecution theory.") I also think the argument that Caesar broke the law as consul in 59 BCE is dubious; on the other hand, I think Caesar's regime as dictator was more corrupt and less effective than Goldsworthy suggests.

A lot of these disagreements come from a book I'm very fond of, Robert Morstein-Marx's Julius Caesar and the Roman People. In many ways JCRP is a response to the "standard" narrative of Caesar outlined by historians and authors like Goldsworthy, and it came out more recently. For Cato the Younger and Brutus, I prefer the biographies by Fred Drogula and Kathryn Tempest respectively.

I must also disagree with Goldsworthy calling Caesar a "patriot" in the epilogue. This is a man who chose his dignitas over the lives of his countrymen and the stability of his country. Even if Caesar enacted some reforms that benefited Rome, when his career was threatened, he put himself first every time.

Even so, I still think that if you want a solid and mostly impartial picture of Caesar's life, Goldsworthy's book is the first one I'd recommend. He gets the overwhelming majority of facts right, as far as I can tell, points out Caesar's positive acts as well as his atrocities, and takes into account the culture and circumstances of Caesar's life.

#jlrrt speaks #julius caesar #book review #book rec #adrian goldsworthy #caesar: life of a colossus #jlrrt essays

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