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lettucedloophole · 7 months

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i never considered sex also being a social construct, and when you pointed that out, (ESP W THE USE OF DWORKINS QUOTE OMFG) it literally blew my mind, including the fact we don’t know what a society looks like outside of patriarchy. i’m having some trouble tho w homosexuality as a social construct. did you mean that in a way where the term and idea of homosexuality is a social construct bc all love is the same, and shouldn’t be classified as such bc of the fact we think its “different”?

also totally unrelated to the specific topic but still on the basis of radical feminism, how do you keep pushing? lately i’ve been feeling like its so hopeless bc i hardly see any significant change happening in the western world, one of the biggest examples is like how u said everyone wants to defend the status quo, and that contributes to my feelings of “im only one person i cant change it all by myself in my community and inspire others to do the same so i should just give up”. i know i won’t really be able to go back to how blissfully ignorant i once was :’) and that’s probably what keeps me from leaving rad feminism bc there’s just so much truth in it and i know i’d rather me and every other human in the world be liberated than give in and live a life with even more misery but there’s still times where i have those thoughts of complying and it just sucks. i gave up my skincare routine (now its just cleanser and moisturizer & the occasional sunscreen if might be out in the sun), makeup, fashion marketed towards women, porn, FANFICTION 😭, crushing on men, dating men, and even being friends w men. i didn’t give up my libido but it disappeared on its own bc of everything i continue to learn. i realize how deep misogyny is in our society and culture and just want to isolate myself from everyone. I CANT RUN FROM IT NO MATGER WHAT THO……💔

for homosexuality as a social construct; kind of. if sex is a social construct (i.e., the categories of male & female don't exist outside of society), it follows that sexuality is as well-- especially because the social construct of women & man are packaged with expectations of submission (to man), pregnancy, confinement to the home, and domination (of women), all but the last trait for women. in patriarchal mythos the class of people defined as "women" are supposed to be heterosexual, and the same goes for men.

the only context which heterosexuality exists in is under patriarchy, so it's impossible to untangle from bioessentialistic complementarianism. similarly, homosexuality is also a construct of patriarchy, albeit a positive subversion / defiance of the heterosexual structure of relationships. but when sex is eventually abolished, and men + women no longer exist, current classifications of sexuality will disintegrate with them. instead of 'man attracted to woman' or 'women attracted to other women', we will just have people liking people, & relationships formerly regarded as homosexual will no longer suffer a stigma compared to heterosexual ones.

if we argue that people are just "born" as heterosexual or gay without investigating what in society makes hetero or homosexuality so appealing or alien & disturbing (the patriarchy), we concede that homosexuals are naturally unnatural (in that, so little of the world is bisexual or gay or asexual under patriarchy, and this is not because of patriarchy, but "nature". therefore, the order of patriarchy is made acceptable through naturalization.)

ANYWAYS, onto your more important question... resisting mental domination, as bell hooks put it. unfortunately this is the hardest thing to answer as i myself haven't even gotten it down yet :') i relate to what you're saying so much, and a lot of other radfems do, so know that you're not alone even if it feels that way.

if i could talk to myself when i first Rad(fem)icalized, i would say... don't be too hard on yourself. we're all suffering from a lifetime of gendered socialization which basically amounts to self harm for women 💀 i went Ham with the radfem stuffs, giving up makeup & sexualized fashion & shaving, and it was relatively easy for me since i was already quite gnc & angry lol, but.

while i think it's good to give up much of that stuff, the world's not gonna explode if you struggle or give yourself some exceptions. don't let up on anything that gets in the way of your personal/political liberation, at least not for a long time, but. don't let people online jerk you around or make you feel like you're a bimbo for wearing makeup or whatever. some internet terfs can be reallyyy misogynistic if you adhere to gender roles or. don't hate trans people.

when you feel angry, don't turn it inward. it's something women & gender minorities do way too much. if you're not comfortable expressing it, though i think expressing it "unhealthily' (screaming at someone, breaking a plate) is better than pointing it at yourself, find a healthy and / or productive way to release it. we are trying to avoid this aspect of female socialization ↓

it's also mega important to remember that... it's easy to think men don't understand the patriarchy, but they do. the thing is, though, they don't give women grace for struggling with sexist socialization and use it as "proof" that women are actually inferior. women who are aware of the patriarchy but have no faith in other women do this as well. have faith in other women. have faith in trans people. have faith in gay & bi people. their liberation is tantamount to your own. and i don't mean individual gender minorities who are assholes... just don't let those assholes make you lose faith in these groups as a whole.

honestly i feel like there's a lot more i could say but idk, don't want to bury you in words lol. feel free to send more asks or message me if there's anything i can elaborate on or help you with! or even if you just need someone to talk to. much love, anon :') 🫶

#radical feminism #trans inclusive radical feminism #tirf #trans inclusive radfem #ex-terf #ex terf #anti prostitution #anti sex trade #anti sex work #asks

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pearlsoftheparticular · 1 year

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notes on chapter 2

Tree imagery is strong on pg 9: "I just thought it would be nice to see how people move into a place and start to inhabit it. Settle in. Maybe put down roots," and later, "He is merely expressing anxieties natural for a boy his age who has just been uprooted from his home in the city..."

Impetus: the force or energy with which a body moves. (pg 10)

Valences: 1. A length of decorative drapery attached to the canopy or frame of a bed in order to screen the structure or space beneath it. 2. A whole number that represents the ability of an atom or a group of atoms to combine w/ other atoms or groups of atoms. 3. Psychological term: the subjective value of an event, object, person, or other entity in the life space of the individual. Also, the pleasantness or unpleasantness of an emotional stimulus.

""This is nice," He says, removing a big clump of her blonde hair from the tines and tossing it into the wastebasket." (pg 11) Oddly, not the last time that hair seems to be a focus in this chapter?

"Nevertheless, despite their purely confessional content, it is not a journal entry but rather an unguarded moment captured on on eof the house Hi 8s that demonstrates Karen's almost bewildering dependence on Navidson." (pg 11) "In that peculiar contradiction that serves as connective tissue in so many relationships, it is possible to see that she loves Navidson almost as much as she has no room for him." (pg 12) [italics added by me for emphasis]

Second reference to hair: "I think Lude started giving one of them a trim, whipping out his scissors which he always has on hand, like old gunslingers I guess always had a hand on their Colts - there he goes, snipping locks & bangs... fingers & steel clicking away, tiny bits of hair spitting off into the surrounding turmoil..." (pg 12)

Galveston is a city in Texas (pg 12, footnote 18)

"The devil's ear" pg 15 - Devil's Ear Spring in Gilchrist County, Florida.

A thought: often, the notes here are used to prove, or at least point out, themes of Navidson's story. Should these be taken seriously? Or dismissed as part of the Fiction, even as red herrings?

"Don't forget to tell them about the birds." (pg 13) - Significant? Foreshadowing of his mother? Pelicans. Esp. considering how he works the tooth/eyebrow scar into the story too.

After the boxing/Birds of Paradise/Russian barge story: "... just looking at this story makes me feel a little queasy all of a sudden. I mean how fake it is. Just sorta doesn't sit right with me. It's like there's something beyond it all, a greater story still looming in the twilight, which for some reason I'm unable to see." (pg 15) Could be another reference to the way he used evidence of his abuse in the story (will come up later), also another nod to "authenticity"/existentialism, possibly proof that Story is starting to effect him. Especially considering how the note began when Karen mentioned the water heater, and Johnny seems to attribute that to his own water heater going out.

Vituperative: bitter and abusive. (pg 16)

"...as of late, many have called into question the accuracy of this self portrait, observing that Navidson may have gone too far out of his way to cast himself in a less than favorable light." (pg 17) This chapter begins with a Mary Shelley quote. Does Davidson consider himself Frankenstein, and the House (or the portrait which comes up later), Frankenstein's monster? It seems he carries plenty of blame/guilt on himself. Especially considering, later on that page, ",.. he also, by way of the film, admits to carrying around his own alienating and intensely private obsessions."

First mention of Delial on pg 17. The name itself could potentially be a mix up of a number of things, purposefully misspelled, purposefully carrying multiple meanings, purposefully vague. Delilah (Samson) seems most clear at the beginning, as seeming competition to Karen. Then misspelling of Belial, which is Hebrew for 'worthless', and the name of a demon in Scripture. Some also point out the similarity to the word denial, which makes sense when this individual is revealed. Someone on an MZD forum back in 2001 once suggested that it was an anagram for "L'ideal", referring to the poem by Charles Baudelaire. Here is a LINK to different translations of the poem. The poem is from Baudelaire's collection, "Les Fleurs du mal".

The "L'ideal" interpretation seems most correct, considering note 23, and the reference to the fake work "Jennifer Caps' Delial, Beatrice, and Dulcinea (Englewood Cliffs, N.J.: Thumos Inc., 1996)". Delial is Davidson's muse, hauntress, and ideal, just as Beatrice was to Dante, and Dulcinea was to Don Quijote.

Albatross (pg 17) - another bird reference. It is sometimes used metaphorically to mean a psychological burden that feels like a curse. Alludes to Samuel Taylor Coleridge's "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner."

This poem, and throw-away reference to the albatross, seem significant, because of this:

In Mary Shelley's Frankenstein, Robert Wealton mentions the poem by name and says of an upcoming journey that "I shall kill no albatross". Coleridge and Shelley were close acquaintances, as well.

Charles Baudelaire's collection of poems "Les Fleurs du mal" also contains poem called "L'Albatros", about men on ships who catch the albatrosses for sport.

SOURCE

"... the house itself, an indefinite shimmer, sitting quietly on the corner of Succoth and Ash Tree Lane, bathed in afternoon light." (pg 18). Succoth: Genesis 33:17, Jacob builds a house at Succoth after his estrangement from Esau. Exodus 12:37 and 13:20, Israel's first camp out of Egypt.

Succoth word meaning: Boothes, to weave protection, weaving.

Succoth is also another name for the Jewish Feast of Tabernacles, or Feast of Booths, where Jewish people stay in temporary dwellings, specifically made out of branches with a roof of leaves, reflecting their wandering and the impermanence of their dwellings.

Impermanence (Succoth) vs Permanence (Ash Tree). Exile. Estrangement.

Not to jump ahead, but Chapter 3 begins with a quote from Exodus.

Selah.

#house of leaves #mzd

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soleilocverse · 3 months

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Chapter 18 Commentary

“Ness would like these,” he says once he’s swallowed his bite, eyes clearing up and his smile gaining some real substance. -- I think that this is very true. And Soleil is happy at the prospect of Ness getting to try them and enjoying them. I think there's also a bunch of Other stuff going on in this line.

Like, Soleil casually holding up the scenario/item/or whatever at hand like a paint swatch to see how it will fit in with Ness is his default state. Putting Ness before himself is ingrained 100%.

And so is pivoting either consciously or unconsciously to thinking about Ness's happiness/health/etc in times of stress. It's much easier, and he has much more practice, and in his opinion it's much more productive to shelve any issue he's having in order to focus on Ness.

And bringing up Ness in this manner takes the attention off of him and puts it onto Ness like a conversation ender; I think this is a subconscious thing though in the way of shelving his issues internally and less trying to avoid some more complicated convo with Ray

And a big thing: Soleil v clearly likes them ^^ Soleil Also mostly avoids saying when he likes things. But ness liking something? Well that's much more acceptable. (And if he gets to enjoy something along the way, like waffle strips or >> going outside, then that would be nice too)

As far as I can tell, unless I've forgotten >>, but doing a quick ctrl+f there is only One instance where he directly tells one of the others something that he currently likes. the other times it's about something that he's liked before, or it's to another chara or w/ them as a buffer

[from ch.12] there's this where Soleil's talking to Emily: “Uh, I,” Soleil looks over at him and Ray kind of makes a go-on, his brow furrows, “I like to bake and read.” Ray tilts his head, he hasn’t seen Soleil read anything but they also haven’t offered anything for him to read, that’s something they’ll have to fix."

there's emily as buffer but he still feels the need to check Ray's reaction before he can vocalize something he likes.

and from ch.17 there's this: "'I know I like the salted caramel and pumpkin spice from your creamers.' Which is new information to Ray."

- yeah!! bc soleil doesn't say the things he likes :). i think it's great that 2x now Ray has been Witness to soleil saying smth he likes and didn't know about, bc it wasn't intentional but v on par. it's not hard to catch some of the things soleil likes through observation: going outside (most of the time), hot chocolate, lasagna, arts and craft-y things. and trying to then ply him with more of those things without him having to ask works to an extent. But it's a reminder that there are so many things soleil continues to hold close to his chest (sometimes consciously, sometimes not).

he can say it so clearly here 1) after months of getting to know the others where any time he's said he's liked something they've only encouraged more of it, 2) because he's providing context for emily (she is a buffer in this situation) 3) and bc (as the deciding factor) he's not talking about the creamers themselves, which he won't have any of either way, but their Scents. he'll talk around saying he likes something by saying it's nice or tastes/feels good or otherwise talk about a Quality that makes him like the thing, but usually doesn't Directly say he likes something.

And the One instance i was thinking of is in ch.15 here: "'I like—spending time with you too.' He says, hoping that maybe she won’t hear it over the sound of the water" There's the pause bc he nearly aborts the sentence and even when he follows through he's worried about announcing it too loudly. Anyway :) looking forward to expanding on that some more in fic :)) esp parallel w/ the others who r very open (and very secure :)) about what they like

“I don’t know if… 'hurting me' is maybe too..." and in his talk w/ Penny where he has quotes around 'distressed' 'proud' 'hurting me' 'of course' [he can stop something that's hurting him] and ‘appreciate me regardless of what I can do for them.’

The quotes are just all the bits he hasn't had reason to believe, that someone would be proud of him, that he would be appreciated, at all, let alone just for existing, that he could stop something (and so easily at that)

And then w/ 'hurting him' and 'distressed' there's some more of Soleil minimizing or dismissing things that make him uncomfortable or >> distressed. bc making breakfast has certainly been distressing him, but dismissing/minimizing for reasons that you can probably guess and that i'm excited to get more into eventually \o/

"He hovers, doing his best to help, and is directed to cut up the bell peppers. That’s all he’s allowed to do and Ray reminds him that he’ll have plenty of dishes to do later so Soleil just flutters around Ness,"

Soleil has SUCH a hard time just existing in front of others. (Ness excluded.) Pointing at earlier in the chapter where he asks if he could just sit there in the kitchen for a little bit. He always feels like he has to have a Reason to exist in a space, he's cleaning up, he's helping cook, he's watching Ness, it's For Ness. And if not, then he's in the suite or otherwise out of the way.

You know, i have known for literal actual years that i have been typo-ing Mega Bloks as Mega Blocks and i was just going to double down and ignore it but then i just....couldn't anymore SDHKDJSHFKJ

i did not mean to write this much but he lives in my head all of the time so why not. also it's really fun character motivation exploration and i really enjoy writing analysis comments like this on other people's fics so. sometimes i'm like maybe i should save some of this analysis for later when there's more payoff but !! if you're here you're probably invested enough that it won't subtract from your readings

ALSO I. THOUGHT I DELETED THIS BY ACCIDENT and just spent like an hour trying to retype it all so. it's defs all going up now

#Ch.18 #Commentary #Soleil

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avatraang · 3 years

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yue x aang moodboard.

“You already saved the world. And you'll save the world again, but you can't give up.”

#atla #aang #yue #yuaang #yue x aang #aanglove #atla moodboard #yueaang #original content #my edit #i have been slaving over this #down to the DETAILS #hnnnnnn #still not perfect but i’m PROUD #esp. w the order of quotes #and also feeling very sensitive about this lol #anyways love these 2 #edit requests #ljf613

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isablleflores · 6 years

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“I could not give up on you.”

3 Rounds and a Sound by Blind Pilot “I was swimming. My eyes were dark 'til you woke me and told me that opening is just the start.”

Landslide by Fleetwood Mac “Can I sail through the changing ocean tides? Can I handle the seasons of my life? Well, I’ve been afraid of changing, cause I’ve built my life around you. But time made you bolder, even children get older, and I’m getting older too.”

Make You Feel My Love by Adele “I could offer you a warm embrace, to make you feel my love.”

I can’t breathe by Bea Miller “How can I live in the moment? When my thoughts never feel like my own and don't know how to admit that I'm broken.”

Jealous by Labrinth “And I told you when you left me, there’s nothing to forgive. But I always thought you’d come back, tell me, all you’ve found was.. heartbreak and misery.”

In My Sleep by Austin Hartley & Kendall Jane Meade “The only time I see you is in my sleep.”

Confidently Lost by Sabrina Claudio “All the days I'm facing, nothing seems to phase me.”

My Backwards Walk by Frightened Rabbit “I'm working on my faults and cracks. Filling in the blanks and gaps. And when I write them out they don't make sense I need you to pencil in the rest”

Seasons by Greyson Chance “I gave up years ago. And as guarded as I am, I’ve got things I’ve left unsaid.“

Wait It Out by Imogen Heap “Everybody says that time heals everything. But what of the wretched hollow? The endless in-between? Are we just going to wait it out?

—— [ CLICK TO LISTEN ]

#wrp.task #wrp.playlist #a summery = sad & heart breaking #lmao #i've ultimately decided to center this playlist around her late husband #esp the different waves she went through during mourning #they're in order of said waves too :')#of course #lyrics that are quoted have meaning #highlighting specific moments of her mourning #anyway #get emo w me :')#enjoyyyy <3

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gracestone · 2 years

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1/3 I say this as a former Rina stan now major PW convert, I just dont see how Ricky and Gina can be good romantic partners in the long run. I honestly believe they could have worked in s1 but if s2 showed us anything its that they cant provide what the o/ needs as a romantic partner. Rickys whole arc has been about his aversion to change. Meanwhile Gina needs less change & more stability in her life. Each character needs to learn at least one lesson per season & I just dont see how their...

2/3 character arcs can cross paths romantically. I do believe they can be a great support to one another as friends. I truly believe s3 should end with Ricky single and learning to be ok/happy with that. Not Rina endgame as they claim b/c then he wouldnt really be learning anything and growing as a character. Maybe over time he realizes he has feelings for G but that honestly wouldnt make any sense if the show wants him to really grow and develop as a more well rounded character... 3/3 If theres anything that he learns from his relation/friendship w/ Lily, it should be that he needs to take some time for himself. I just think it would be poor storytelling for him to realize that he has feelings for G by the end of the season esp. when she already moved on. Doesnt seem fair to drag her back to that state of pining after Ricky. Rina have great chemistry but it would be a regression of their characters to be romantic at this point. Also Nini & Gs friendship would be at risk..

I completely agree that Ricky and Gina's individual arcs can't cross paths romantically. They go in opposing directions instead of complementing each other, and so in order for them to get the individual growth they need, they can't be together. Because one of them would always be holding the other back. I've talked about it quite extensively in this post, so I'll try not to repeat myself too much here and instead say something new.

This answer kinda got away from me, so I'm putting it under a read more and dividing it into a Ricky section and a Gina one.

Ricky

I think the mindset that most R*nas have that Ricky needs to let go from Nini romantically stems from a very superficial reading of the show and Ricky's character arc. The show has established that Ricky hates change and that he clings to the past because he feels safe. That much is true. But R*nas wrongly apply that to his relationship with Nini. They argue that because they've known each other for a long time and because he feels safe with her, his love for her is therefore holding him back from growing as a person. So they think that Rini is what's holding Ricky back.

On top of that, the fandom coddles Ricky too much. They feel bad for him when he feels down, so they have this tendency to want to wrap him in a blanket and keep him safe from hurt forever. It's understandable to feel that way about a character you love. But that's essentially what Ricky is already doing to himself, and it's what's keeping him back.

Ricky has a fear of commitment, but it's not because he has "abandonment issues". The only person who has ever "left" him is his mother, and she didn't abandon him. Yes, her going to Chicago was difficult for him (and for her), and at first they didn't talk much. But she did try to talk to Ricky. It's not like she just up and left him and his dad without saying a word. So no, Ricky doesn't have "abandonment issues". His commitment issues stem from a fear of change and, most importantly, rejection.

Ricky coasts instead of committing because he's terrified that he's not actually good at anything. He literally tells us this in 1x09 through the Troy quote he chooses:

Ricky is so afraid of failure that he'd rather not try new things at all. Because caring about something really deeply and then finding out that you're not good at it or messing it up? That hurts. Deeply.

He was terrified to tell Nini that he loves her, because he watched his parents tell each other that same thing all his life until they eventually stopped doing so and their relationship fell apart. In Ricky's eyes, his parents failed at their relationship. And not just that: he saw how much it hurt his father when his mother stopped loving him and ended their relationship. If Ricky admits that he loves Nini, their relationship potentially falling apart would only hurt him more, and he'd be left devastated like his father was. So he shuts down and tells Nini he wants a break instead. He'd rather put things on pause now than risk getting hurt even more after admitting how much he cares. But once he realises that by doing so he drove Nini further away from him and ended their relationship, he realises that he does need to show how deeply he cares sometimes.

His love for Nini has never been a problem. In fact, it's the one thing that drives Ricky's character arc in a positive direction. Because his love for Nini is intrinsically tied to his love for music.

I don't think it's a coincidence that Nini confessed her feelings to him through song. It wasn't just her way of putting herself and her talent out there for all the world to see while saying "I love you" in a way that felt safe and fitting for her. I think she knew that Ricky would secretly love it if she wrote a song for him. Because at the end of the day, no one knows him like she does. She's the only girl who knows what he's about (his words). That's why Ricky feels so safe with Nini and why he's braver when she's around to encourage him and believe in him. Like when she wanted him to come back on stage with her to sing Breaking Free. He felt he wasn't at his best, but she told him to just look at her, and it worked. He gave an incredible performance.

The thing about Ricky's "relationships" with Gina and Lily is that they are his safe options. Because neither are asking Ricky to commit to anything. Gina's "just fly, dude" comment summed it up pretty well. Just go with the flow and see where they land. Ricky and Gina "worked" as a flirtation in season 1 because they were both terrified to admit how much they cared about both the people in their lives and the show. Neither of them wanted that snatched away from them. But while Gina was afraid to admit that she cared because she feared she could never get the stability she needed to keep the things she cared about, Ricky was afraid to dream bigger and take more risks to get the things he wanted. He needed to put himself out there for all the world to see, but he was afraid that would lead to rejection and failure.

In addition to Gina and Lily not asking Ricky to commit to anything, they also don't challenge or inspire him to grow. They only compliment him on the things he does right, but they never call him out on the things he does wrong, let alone demand he does better. He never has to face any hard truths with them. He craves validation so badly, but the downside of him getting that validation too much is that he starts taking the things he has for granted and stops working as much for them as he should. He stops trying to be better. Because if he keeps reaching higher and higher, he keeps risking failure and rejection. So if he just keeps doing the same thing that he gets complimented on, surely he'll be safe and happy, right? He would never have to try new things or show how deeply he cares by committing to something, right?

Nini, unlike Gina and Lily, isn't afraid to speak the hard truth to Ricky. And as much as he doesn't like that, he needs to hear it in order to grow. Because as long as people only talk to him about the things he's good at, he can allow himself to coast and not commit to anything. But once he's hit with the hard truth? That's when he changes. Nini is angry with him for not saying "I love you" back, kinda dumping her and making fun of the theater? He joins the theater and puts himself out there by 1) auditioning and 2) declaring his love for her in song. Nini is angry that he's coasting through dance rehearsals and not fully committed to his role as Troy? Ricky stays up all night to practice the dance and gets it right. Nini tells him that he should talk to his mom because talking to her always makes him feel better? He calls his mom and, surprise surprise, he feels better. We see something similar when Mazzara calls Ricky out for being unreliable. Nini had already encouraged Ricky to audition for himself, not for her, but it wasn't until Mazzara essentially said that it didn't suprise him Ricky was giving up that Ricky felt the need to prove him wrong and go to the audition. Ricky needs to be challenged in order to grow.

The people who don't make Ricky face the hard truths make it too easy for him to put off trying to find out who he is. Deep down, Ricky knows who he is and who he wants to be, but because he's so terrified of failure and rejection, he doesn't want to admit it. That's why we get the contradiction in 1x01 of a skater rat who hates musicals and the theater yet for some reason knows how to play guitar. He's terrified of admitting how much he loves music, because what if he's no good at it? So he'd rather hate on musicals and theater people than admit that he's secretly jealous of their talent and their courage to put themselves out there.

The thing about Ricky and Nini is that their character arcs complement each other. Remember the Troy line that Ricky quotes that I mentioned above? Compare that with the Gabriella line Nini chose:

Sounds familiar? Both Ricky and Nini feel like there's a whole other person inside of them just looking for a way to come out. Only Nini finally has the courage to let that person come out, because she spent a summer at theater camp and had EJ to see her talent and encourage her to put herself out there. Ricky still doesn't believe in himself and his talent, so he needs a lot more growth before he can be on the same path as Nini. That's why they didn't work in season 2. Instead of being the person who gives up the role of Troy when Nini needs a solid performer next to her on stage, he needs to become the person who steps up his game and gives her his all, because she deserves a great scene partner.

I think the point of Ricky's relationship with Lily in season 3 will be to get him to a point where he no longer has a choice but to admit what the things in his life are that he deeply cares about and that define who he is. I find it really likely that Ricky will once again try to coast his way through the auditions, only this time he won't magically get the lead. And his relationship with Lily will likely lead to him drifting apart from the other Wildcats. Potentially even Big Red and Nini. Once he reaches a point where he's lost Nini, Big Red, the Wildcats, and the lead (bonus points if the role he lost is Troy), he will no longer be able to pretend like he didn't actually care about any of those things, or like losing them don't hurt him. And once he feels that hurt of rejection, it's up to him to then find a way to deserve the things he wants again. He wasn't able to call the Wildcats his family in season 1, but I wouldn't be surprised if he gets to that point at the end of season 3.

And similarly, I think his relationship with Lily will make him realise that he needs to stop equating romantic relationship with personal happiness and that he shouldn't use girls who validate his talents as a way to put off defining who he is and who he wants to be. He needs to stop playing it safe, and he needs to stop trying to get a romantic relationship "right". Love will find him when he's ready. There's no ticking clock on getting it right, which is what Ricky seems to think.

I know he says that it's "weird", but I think he voices it like a question because he wants Big Red to agree with him and assure him that no, you don't just have until you're 21 to find true love. But Big Red doesn't catch on to that, and so Ricky is still left feeling that way. I think that's another mindset he'll grow out of next season, or at least won't be driven by as much anymore going forward.

Essentially, I agree that Ricky will end season 3 having made the choice to be single and to learn how to find happiness outside of a romantic relationship. He'll need to find out who he is before he's ready to commit to anyone. And I think once he becomes confident in the person he is and wants to be, Nini will be there waiting for him. Because at that point their paths will intersect and they'll be able to go forward together. They'll be able to reach for the stars together.

Gina

As for the Gina aspect of your ask, I agree that her ever pining for Ricky again would be character regression. His non-committal attitude with her made it all the easier for her to not really commit to him in return. She kept giving him outs when it came to talking about feelings and she let him get away with taking those outs (as I just talked about in this post). What Ricky did do for her is that he gave her a (false) sense of security. Once she started falling for him and spending more time with him, she started thinking that maybe things wouldn't change this time. That she could start caring about her role, the show, and the Wildcats. And that if things did start to change, she could fight it. Because that's what they did when Miss Jenn was almost fired, and it worked!

But just as Gina is finally ready to admit how much she cares about the Wildcats by excitedly telling her mom about how much fun she's having with them, the rug gets pulled out from under her and her life changes again. In a way that makes her once again feel powerless. It's in that moment and in the following days that Gina needs someone to fight for her. To show her that her life doesn't have to change and that she can have a choice. Just like Ricky voiced his fear that there's a ticking clock on finding true love as a question to Big Red, so does Gina voice this as a question:

Gina is used to not having any control over change, but, as I went into in the post I mentioned two paragraphs above, Ricky is really resistant to change and will fight it and find solutions if he cares enough. However, over the course of 1x08 and 1x09, Gina learns that Ricky didn't fight for her to stay, or at the very least come back. He tells her in 1x09 that he thought he'd never see her again. He accepted that. He's not trying to find ways to get Gina the stability she needs. He thinks that if she wants it, she'll fight for it herself.

The people that do see what Gina wants and needs and find ways to solve her problems and give her what she wants are EJ and Ashlyn. EJ buys her a plane ticket because it wouldn't be fair for her to miss opening night, and Ashlyn offers to let her stay with her for as long as she wants. Gina has always been very independent and hates admitting that she needs help, let alone asking for it, but secretly she wants people to look after her and give her a hand when she needs it. That's why EJ's sweet gestures matter so much to her, and why she's so touched by Ashlyn and Carlos constantly reaching out to her and trying to include her.

She needs people in her life who help her get the stability she craves and who encourage her to let her walls down and let people in. Ashlyn, Carlos and Nini are the people who keep doing that for her platonically (they've been given most of the focus, but that doesn't make the smaller moments with the other Wildcats doing the same thing less important), and EJ does that for her romantically. He's the one who consistently inspires Gina to grow and become a better version of herself, and the one who makes Gina feel seen and understood, instead of feeling invisible or judged. He doesn't project his own insecurities onto her, unlike Ricky (he came at her for having too much ambition, even though he's secretly jealous of her). And in turn, Gina makes EJ feel seen and understood too. Together, they've come to realise that happiness is about other people, not their achievements, and that they're not ready to leave those people behind. And they've inspired each other to become braver and more emotionally honest people. That's huge for both of them, and I don't see them ever regressing back to the people they were before they got together.

Gina needs someone who can match her ambition but who will also show up for her and can give her the stability she needs. That will never be Ricky, because he needs to learn to be brave enough to reach for the stars and come to see change as an inevitable part of life that is neither good or bad. It just is, and he needs to learn to make the best of it. That's why Ricky and Nini are a perfect fit, and why EJ and Gina work so well too. Their character arcs complement each other. And that's essential for a romantic relationship to work in fictional stories. If they can't walk the same path in life, their relationship can never work.

#hsmtmts #ricky bowen #nini salazar roberts #rini #gina porter #ej caswell #portwell #hsmtmts meta #rini meta #portwell meta #anti rina #ask #the lead up to getting all three parts of this ask was quite suspenseful #but i hope i managed to make the pay off worth it #i certainly put a lot of effort into this answer #hope you don't mind me going on and on about rini #given your shipping history you may not like them #but i think they're going to be endgame and that understanding their arc together helps you understand their individual arcs really well #anouk rambles

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sarcasmic-skies · 3 years

Text

about me!

i’m tyler (they/them), you can call me ‘ty’ :^) i’m a queer 23 y/o 4th generation swing dancer who loves their wife & this is my shitty blog!!

my dead poets society tattoo post w/gale’s response

free access to the dead poets society novel (google drive link)

i’m delivermetyler on ao3 (i beta for @still-in-my-2020s <3)!! msg me if you want me to beta for you!!

my inbox is open for messages & asks, so feel free to reach out!! <3 more info abt me under the cut :^)

what i typically post/rb:

poetry, quotes, webweavings, etc. (esp shakespeare <3)

favorite films/shows/games/books of mine (dead poets society, house md*, fight club, a separate peace, criminal minds, platoon, american psycho, bioshock, top gun, star wars, hbo war, m*a*s*h**, dcu & many more). i’m also part of danonation <3

a wee little bit of military history!! but no blind nationalism here lol. my favorite eras/those i am most knowledgeable abt: the civil war, wwii, vietnam era (also my favorite eras in the war film genre!)

art! collage art, photography, & paintings. i love art depicting the human body, so please be aware i may rb posts w/blood or nudity, but i will not post/rb graphic/detailed sexual content!

music!!!!! 40s-80s tunes: the bulk of my listening. 50s & 60s: my favorite decades. i love elvis presley, dion dimucci, the righteous brothers, depeche mode, squeeze, johnny cash, dean martin, bruce springsteen, rufus wainwright, billy joel, elo, glen campbell, the beatles, gene pitney, marty robbins, slade, the eagles, johnnie ray, twin atlantic, interpol, blur, the beach boys, cake, new order, arctic monkeys, pilot, frank sinatra, hank snow, elvis costello, the clash, the smiths (fuck morrissey), & plenty of others… esp yacht rock, doo wop, folk, new wave, punk, [pre-80s] country, & honky tonk <3

interests/hobbies of mine:

the basics (reading/annotating, watching films & tv, listening to lots of music); cross stitch, sewing, collecting & repairing vintage clothing; swing dancing, gambling (among friends), driving, writing, playing guitar, harmonica, etc.; research, sending & receiving handwritten letters, photography, baking, thrifting, & getting tattooed!!!

*my liveblogging for my first ever watchthrough [211018-211211] is under #ty’s house md watch party

**my liveblogging for my first ever watchthrough [220124-220807] is under #ty’s m*a*s*h watch party

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zirkkun · 2 years

Note

I just saw your post about turning to rest of ULR or at least Part 2 (and not Part 1; you will keep those/that comic(s)) into a visual novel; which honestly, sounds really cool.

I am guessing you saying that it won't be like "Act to Flirt", means more tone (I could see ULR being overall more dark than "Act to Flirt" for instance) and story and probably mechanic wise, instead of like, art style, though, those might differ some too.

Me quoting one of the tags on the post where you talked about this:

"a ulr visual novel will be very story heavy and pretty much a straight shot through"

So will they will be any routes for ULR (or at least canon ULR, fans might do some fan stuff) and different endings, or will it be mostly linear? Or maybe just a few endings and/or routes, esp. in comparison to "Act to Flirt"?

Is the reason it easier for you to do visual novels now over comics, due to all your experiences w/ "Act to Flirt" or something? One last thing, I sent you a rather long ask right after Deltarune Chapter 2 was announced (or was it when it was released. Either way, it was around that/those time(s)), and I just wanted to ask if you got it or did tumblr eat it (no rush in answering it or anything if you did get it. It was less questions and more me being excited and gushing anyways. And I know you are busy and stuff). If tumblr ate it, I think I have a copy of the ask, and I might send (if do actually have a copy that is) it as an ask again (that you could answer privately if you want, since I like said, it was mainly just me gushing), or a DM (I don't usually DM people since I want to be careful not to bug them.

Anyways, your plans for ULR sound interesting. Excited for more of it/them, when you can. Also excited for more "Act to Flirt" (the Heartbreak route is probably going to break my heart too, ahaha) and that really nice/cool "Don't Forget" comic you are doing too; whenever you can though. No rush on stuff.

When I say it won't be like Act to Flirt, I mean like. Act to Flirt is technically a "visual novel," but it has a LOT of game elements and a lot of things change based on player input. An Underlust Reimagine visual novel wouldn't be like that since there is just too many set-in-stone things. It would be a literal visual novel and there would be likely little to no player input at all.

Technically speaking there are "routes" for ULR, but they will all be done in the main story. Each one has to be done in order for the "true ending" to be achieved. Yes, this includes a genocide route. The genocide route is a little different for ULR than most Undertale AU's. Emphasis on the "little." It's still going around and killing people, at the end of the day. But the end goal is drastically different.

As for why visual novels are easier for me, it's just no different than like, one person being good at music and another person struggling. The way the content is made just flows pretty easily for me.

Not exactly sure what happened to your other ask but Tumblr tends to eat a lot of long asks. But thank you for your interest! Glad you're enjoying it all! ♥

#undertale act to flirt #zircon answers #underlust reimagine question #chatxkilluaxnoir

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deviantartdramanow · 2 years

Text

Recounting RedDragonDraws (My Personal Experience + Evidence)

Hello there! U mightve seen my name pop up on this blog b4! My name is Ringo, n I have spoken thru the ask feature on this blog b4.

I have delt w/ a lot of awful thingz from RedDragonDraws, n as he and his friends have continued 2 harass me n my friends n say many gross things about us. Before I start, I’d like 2 thank this blog.

Ur posts n archives of RDD’s actions has helped me show proof n help the mutuals of mine n server members who were gaslit, lied 2, n frightened in2 not speaking up against RDD’s actions towards me n others. I cannot thank you enough. And w/ this, I have decided 2 contribute 2 this blog myself.

RDD + CO’s hatred started when they claimed I “defended” Zinzo’s actions between hyr n another person on discord. However, I never did. What I actually did wuz call them out on the fact they were all callin Zinzo, a minor, sexually degrading terms (ie: whore, slut, hoe, etc), callin Zinzo a rapist when what they did- although wrong- Wuz nowhere close 2 rape, n i said comparin Zinzo 2 their groomer wuz disgustin. Im currently gonna work on gettin a better set of screenshots of this situation.

Attached in the Google drive r many screenshots of evidence against RDD n his friends: - William - Lily/Noah - Galaxy - Mittenpea (B4 I link the drive, I apologize that sum scs r censored, sum r not. I didn’t have time 2 censor all of these so I apologize 4 inconsistencies) Contained in the drive: - Two screenshots of a whiteboard by Zinzo that RDD + Co vandalized - Screenshots involving me being misgendered and sexualized by Mittenpea, one of RDD’s friends, only 2 have his other friends also misgender me, insult me, and side w/ the transphobic remarks. - RDD’s racism towards Vietnamese ppl - Lily/Noah’s DeviantArt post lyin about me + my debunkin of said post - Screenshots of when RDD went 2 my deviantart after I blocked him on discord, all 2 basically beg 4 pity on one of my own vent artworks. (I will also link+archive the DeviantArt posts where this occurred in the description) he even favorited my pieces, which really freaked me out - Them supporting someone saying I have the rights of “a toaster” bc I am nonbinary, along w/ deadnamin me - Mittenpea and Galaxy making fun of a girl speaking about her experience of being sexually assaulted, with Galaxy saying she needs to, and I quote, “Get over it.” - Mittenpea sending a very transphobic meme to a server, making fun of the usual transphobe talking point of the suicide rate amongst trans youth (despite transphobes like Mittenpea being the reason that the trans youth suicide rate is so high). - An image submitted by my friend Mikan, who wuz briefly kinda-sorta datin RDD. RDD would make many gross sexual remarks about her, because according to him, in a past life, she wuz a “Vietnamese sex worker” who he apparently “hooked up w/ in [his] past life”. Mikan herself is actually Vietnamese. I shouldn’t rly have 2 even further elaborate on how disgustin this behavior is.

RDD also sent her drawings he made of Vietnamese ppl burning in bushes…knownin that she is Vietnamese.

The Google Drive (Note: “Leeeny” is RDD’s nickname/how he wuz known on the server) A Piece From My DA That RDD Commented On

Archive: https://archive.ph/dDFHA

Him Commenting + Seeking Pity ON MY VENT ART

Archive: https://archive.ph/HrD9I

RDD also drew something, mocking the fact I have struggled w/ alcohol addiction, callin me n my friend (4 some reason???) a “ragin drunkard” I am much better now and I rly don’t drink often, however after the misgenderin incident I ended up drinking a little in order 2 avoid hurtin myself in any other way bc I felt cornered n hurt n so many other thingz all at once. When I did drink i wuznt even angry or in a rage, it mellowed me out so i rly dont know why he keeps callin me “raging drunkard”.

It’s esp disgustin bc RDD is aware that I have PTSD n struggle w/ a lot of other mental illnesses. Seein as hes so obsessed w/ Vietnam n seems 2 have a weird obsession w/ PTSD, u think he’d understand how common it is 4 ppl w/ PTSD 2 form addictions??? Esp at a young age.

Thread Where I Discussed His Drawin Mockin Me

Sorry if this post seems very scatterbrained, I have rly bad ADHD n sumtimes its rly hard 4 me 2 sit down n write a bunch of stuff out like this, esp somethin I’ve had 2 explain 2 ppl several times in my personal life. I hope this can provide more insight on2 his current actions n the situationz involving me. If any further contact is needed, since I dont have a tumblr, u can reach me on my twt n da, which r both shown in the links I sent. Thx 4 ur time, ~ Ringo

Mod note: just one correction, the one image where it’s a red bg saying “Charlie” over and over is regarding his Walten Files AU and not actual racism. one more thing, please do NOT witch hunt the discord users!

#submission #drama #deviantart #anon post #reddragondraws #slur tw

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palms-upturned · 2 years

Note

touga for the ask meme if you want

oh god oh fuck jxsgxjcb

character ask meme

What I love about them

kdzghsdjchcb what a loaded question… well ill admit i find touga really compelling, and i feel complicated about him… err not even necessarily feeling complicated about him as a person, but more like his role in the narrative as the show’s only male csa victim (well saionji and miki are also victims, but touga is the only one with that experience of the long term grooming/abuse/rape). i really appreciate the show’s exploration of how we often cling to systems that abuse us so long as they give us power to abuse someone else in order to feel in control, and touga is the ultimate example of that… i don’t necessarily think his storyline is bad, in fact i think it’s very good, but… well, it sends a bit of an unintentional message that he’s the only man in the position that he’s in 🤔 but that’s why i appreciate the movie going in a different direction with it, centering how the gendered ideals that utena (and others) project onto anthy and touga both make it impossible for both of them to be heard/seen as victims… err im getting off topic shgsnxcn i guess what i love about touga as a character is that there’s a lot of interesting things to discuss when it comes to him, and a lot of questions that i don’t really have answers for even after like 2 years of reflecting… also ill admit that the issue of suicidality that he and saionji both grapple with hits close to home

What I hate about them

lol i mean… putting aside the obvious 💀 i feel like every iteration of touga across the anime, manga, and LNs has managed to deal me such immense levels of psychic damage, more than any other character SHSBDJXHDB mostly bc i feel like the anime/movie is the only iteration that treats him w any thoughtfulness as both a csa victim and a predator in the making… the manga and LNs made me feel like i was gonna go bald with some of the things they did with him 💀 at least in the anime, it’s very intentional with touga’s behaviors to showcase the tactics he uses to circumvent (or just ignore lol) people’s personal boundaries and manipulate them, like he’s just as careful an exploration of grooming tactics as akio is, but also the anime shows how akio’s grooming OF touga actually served to cut off touga from anyone who could potentially help him when he realized the kind of situation he was in, like everything serves a narrative purpose and is very carefully crafted… meanwhile the LNs incorporate some kind of weird sexual/abusive dynamic between him and miki seemingly for shock value and the manga wants to purport that touga is genuinely in love with utena, despite how he literally abandons her and says he doesn’t want to see or speak to her anymore after it’s implied that akio rapes her and she literally comes to touga for help and support, so like… 💀💀💀 UGH AND DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON AFTER THE REVOLUTION… god. anyway the thing i hate the most aside from the most obvious things is that every iteration of him outside of the anime makes me unbelievably pissed off HSGSDJXBCB

Favorite moment/quote

hmmmm well tbh there are a lot of interesting moments w touga, but even tho i don’t like light novel touga, i do enjoy this one conversation he has with utena along the lines of “friendship is just a misunderstanding,” about how we often feel insecure about whether or not other people love us the way we love them, and so we just assume/project things onto them because it’s easier than grappling with the uncertainty and asking questions we might not wanna hear the answers to… i think the anime touches on that too (only a fool believes in true friendship), and it’s a v important and relatable concept when it comes to trauma and abuse and people not wanting to do the work of understanding how victims experience the world and relationships, but it was esp interesting to hear someone talk about it directly, and i just really like the phrasing of “friendship is a misunderstanding”

What I would like to see more focus on

errrr… well i don’t know, i feel like the anime and the movie paint a pretty complete picture and say everything it wanted to say, but i guess i do get curious about what touga and nanami’s storylines might have looked like if koyasu didn’t have to take a break from the show for an entire cour sksbsndn tho i think poor nanami had it hard enough without her parents turning out to be predators on top of it all 💀

What I would like to see less focus on

i don’t know… i just wish other rgu material could be normal about him 💀

Favorite pairing with

saionji… 😔 gay people i do not respect

Favorite friendship

sksywjebcb well as touga loves to say, saionji is his only friend 😭 but like i said in anthy’s post, i wouldn’t exactly call it a “friendship,” but the two of them have a v interesting dynamic in the stuco saga, collaborating on their epic pranks on nanami and saionji… well i end up thinking on them often because they know truths about each other that no one else does, so the way that anthy seems genuinely devastated in episode 11 to hear touga say all the shit to her he said in the greenhouse makes me… 😔 as a friend of mine likes to say, “victim” is not a viable class because everyone responds to trauma and oppression differently, and i think these two are the ultimate example of that w how touga treats her… not that i think anthy particularly thought of him as a friend or trustworthy, but just tfw you let your guard slightly down for like half a second because this is someone who’s supposed to Understand™️ and instead he weaponizes that understanding to inflict the max amount of pain onto her, UGGGHHHH… i hate him NDGSVSJDNX

NOTP

man idk… i think practically everyone on this show ought to have a restraining order on him djsgsjdbjx

Favorite headcanon

not a hc so much as a joke but i think it’s funny that utena asks if touga is italian and he doesn’t say no… italian touga be like i make-a the pasta! i harass-a the women! ohhh!!

#asks #anon #rgu #rape mention #csa mention

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kristalpepsi · 3 years

Photo

Temptation Stairway Thoughts™ + Theory Discussion

TW: blood + Death mentions, Implied (forced/pushed) integration (systems), racism (against asians), unreality stuff bc the show is Like That, Trauma causd by therapy

TL;DR = I mainly talk about implied integration, n as some1 in a system tht! mkes me uncomfy! I mainly will talk abt wht I’m calling the multi-ena theory (n anothr theory ill call the Multiple/Multi-Enaverse Theory) thts been popping up n disccng how thts kind of the bggst thng keepng me on board! I won’t LIE I might b a little biased bc I rlly do like thise show b I am NOT blind so I will try 2 address som things. I also talk alot abt the Shepard n Phindol bc I love themb so much they make me very heart Big.

DISCLAIMERS:

Obviously Joel G Highkey/definitely/most probbly did not intend 4 any of thise, but media is very complic8d so u cn end up accidntlly making problmtc things or implyng not great things

I hav a typing quirkkkk so if u cant understand my post I rlly dont blame u! I’m sorry how I type is Incomprehensible™

Not an angry post, more like my brain is holding me host-ge until i talk abt everyth dskfjhd!!

DO NOT Send anyone in thise post hate or angry asks/messages or perish by my sword

OK so this recnt episde has me w vry vry mixd feelngs!!! I’m both happy n exctd! b litrlly 2 things is whts bothrng me. While I CLD jst say :I Am Lookng Away: i rlly do need 2 write it down. Under a Read-more bc im secure SKSJ

Part 0: I’m uncomfortable help

The Section wher i tlk abt n bring up othr ppl’s concerns

So fr most if nt all the frnds I hav who also wtch Ena ALSO has a vry “vr vry mixd feelngs now tht I’ve seen the episde!!” mood twrds Temptation Stairway! It’s 4 a bunch of rsns, like thise post (tw racism) mde by a frnd whch brings up a good point

Part 1: The Actual Intro

Episode 1 = Auction day (AD) Episode 2 = Extinction Party (EP) Episode 3 = Tempation Stairway (TS)

Who is Ena

Ena can b describd as an "abstract girl split in half, w 1 blue side n the other is her yellow side!" Each side (emotion/mood, 2 b specific) seems 2 hav their own voic actor credited along with seper8 credits 4 each mood! So far the canon sides r Ena (happy), Ena (sad), n Ena (drunk)! They seem 2 act accordingly: Happy acts happy n optimistc, Sad acts sad n especlly depressd, n Drunk acts confused n dizzy [In the Credits, it would look like thise: Ena (happy) by Gabe V., Ena (sad) by Lizzie Freeman, (drunk) Ena by Sam Meza

4 Episodes 1-2, thy follow thise pattern exctly! So we cn expect wht 2 see from them, n each voice actor is creditd accordngly as seper8 b all a part of Ena

On epside 3, Ena is seen as actng diffrnt!! She's suddnly less predictabl! I say thise bc Suddenly, her voic Actors r not stuck 2 Only their sides. Thise is also emphasized when looking at the credit list! No longer is it "Ena (happy) by Gabe V., Ena (sad) by Lizzie Freeman" it's now jst "ENA by Gabe V. and Lizzie Freeman"

Happy's voic can sound STRESSED n sad, Happy can tlk w Blue's side in mor control n Sad's voic can sound Really happy n optimistic. Somth's Diffrnt n Not The Same

Temptation Stairway Summary

Skipping 2 my point, The summary of the episode Temptation stairway is tht Moony and Ena have a bet 2 race 2 the Great Runas! The Great Runas, can grnt u any wish accordng 2 Moony n som of those Ena passes by on the wy. The wager, is tht "whoever reaches the top of the Great Runas n makes their wish 1st, has 2 pay the debts of the loser" (yes it’s phrased like that) As Ena journeys thru, The DIFFERENCES between Ena Temptation Stairway and Ena Extinction Party n Below, is mor obvious as the epsde progrsses, even 2 wher Happy's voic actor is the 1 screamng in agony 2 jst get murdered already. The Episode ends w Moony beatng Ena (but it's 100% possibl it can be the other way arnd, that ENA Beat Moony, b thats somth I'll discuss in a bit L8r). Moony splits in half, revealing that according 2 her, "she wished 2 be skinny" n a humanoid coms out of her previous form. As 4 Ena, Her blue side slowly dispprs n its not answrd why.

Theories so far, are:

Moony wished 4 Ena 2 b happy (or 4 her sad/blu side 2 go awy. 4 wht reason can b eithr wholsom or 2 Moony's advntge [like so she "doesnt have 2 deal w Sad Ena"]) - b if Moony wished 4 Ena 2 b happy/b rid of her sad side, tht wld mean perhaps she lied about wishing 2 be skinny (her new humanoid form may be how she is "paying her debt 2 the loser"). Unless the Runas can grant u more than 1 wish.

Ena ws the 1 who wished her blu side awy, whch is a little depressng tbh

If both the above r tru, it may b possibl bc it wsnt clarified (afaik) tht the great runas can only grant ONE person a wish (or more). I think we only get tht implica8ion bc we see 1 (open) door while in the distance, ther r more doors tht look like their eyes r closed. We hav 2 remembr Moony said "whoever makes their wish 1st whch means Ena n Moony can totlly mke wishes @ the sme time

Somhow, turning pure yellow/only happy is how Moony is payng her debt 2 Ena(??) (opposite 2 the 1st theory)

OR If Ena won the race, it can even b possibl 2 consider tht Ena did not make ANY wish, n her debt 2 pay 2 Moony is her sad/blue side removed (I do not subscribe 2 thise)

This info that was brought up 2 me is high evidenc that Moony won the race, n it explains how Moony surprises Ena whn Ena arrives. “I’m The Best and you’re the worst! I wonder who got the hair chest?” said by Ena, is a direct reference 2 a phrase usd by kids when they lose that goes “First is the worst, second is the best, third is the one with the hairy chest.”

“Whoever reaches the top of the Great Runas n makes their wish 1st, has 2 pay the debts of the loser.“ Might be phrased tht way as a weird way 2 pay 4 ur greed? (Last minute addition from me since some people wld think this is quoted wrong in and outside of the youtube comments)

i'm p sure ther may even b mor theories b i dont rmmbr them OOPS

Part 2: The Implied Integration Part AKA: How the System!Ena theory is affected by this episode

TW: Final fusion discussion, medical trauma (Is that the right word)

Disclaimer: This is 100% unintended by Joel G. That’s y the Alternative title 2 thise part is “How the System!Ena theory is affected by this episode”

2 GET IN2 the whole Implied Integr8ion part of my Essay™ I hav a theory calld system ena or sys!ena! (Check out my #system ena tag. This is in chronologicl order!) While thers no canon explan8ion 4 how Ena herslf is how she is, she mkes very intrstng n almst good accdntl Sys Represent8ion 2 me! They even show cofronting rlly well! I headcanon Ena as a system bc of the accidentl system!rep, but it explains 2 me y n how she switches! she has triggers 4 when she switchs 2 a diffrnt side, etc!

Ther hav been theories about Temptation Stairway in the past (before the episode cme out) wher ppl try 2 explain y the trailer Looks Like Tht. Besides theorizing abt the introduction of a new forme (I'm ok w just calling it Scared/Anxiety 4 now until 4rthr notic), 1 of the theories ive seen is tht Temptation Stairway's new introduced forme is due 2 being something akin 2 being "integr8d" (probably by force, accordin 2 the OP) (in other words, all her sides merge in2 one) n Ena being devast8td abt it

While tht theory is now DEBUNKED, bc the new forme clearly did not come out bc of being One Single Mind now, the "integr8ion" part of tht theory is unfortun8ly a littl tru

What is Integr8ion?

Integr8ion is not inherently a bad thing. In systems, ther are 2 definitions: "the breaking down of barriers 2 form healthy multiplicity, n then healthy communic8ion n less amnesiac barriers" and the othr, n mor FAMOUS definition bc its the oldest 1, is "final fusion"

Fnal Fusion is when all the members "fuse/merge" 2gether until ther is 1 single mind left. While not necssrlly a bad thng, final fusion n ther4 "integr8ion" is a scry thing 4 a lot of systems 2 talk abt, because in the history of Treatment, Final fusion is uslly somthng forcd on2 systems 4 the longest time :^(

Very valid 2 hav final fusion as a goal, b showng it as a desire n end goal is uslly seen as a sad n even scry thing 2 promote accdntly or not in media, bc of the previous traumas in the medicl/therapy world of system treatment etc

What's Worse. is tht if we apply the Ending 2 Temptation Stairway to the System!Ena Theory, thts wht hurts!!!

Scrolling back up 2 the possibl theories of who won the race and wht happened aftr, Either Moony or Ena wishing 4 the blue side/Sad Ena 2 go awy is rlly painful!

B I'll be honest, thts a RLLY biased n personal opinion i hav!! I've seen ppl think its rlly wholsom altho a bit Sad, tht the blue side disappears. I've seen ppl think its rlly sweet esp if it was Moony who mde tht wish

BSCLLY If I were to hold on2 the System!Ena headcanon while watchng the Temptation Stairway episode, its Hurtful, not rlly bc of the implied Integr8ion of Sides, but bc most top theories r that the blue side disappeard on Purpose either from Moony or Ena wishing her away or involvng the debt! It's like asking 4 ur sibling irl 2 Disappear and cease 2 exist. it's scary n rlly sad esp whn the audienc can c tht Sad, Happy, n Drunk cn almst b seen as their own persons n mite even b abl 2 interact w each othr (as seen by the many fanart of Happy n Sad having their own seper8 forms)

Ok so Now tht ive described my intro n Main Beef w the Episode, here's a theory I cn rlly get behind tht dsnt mke me wnna cry behind a Denny's. Prsnlly it's a rlly relievng theory even if it mite b hard 2 take in

Ther's no name 4 it, som call it the Enaverse, b just so it dsnt get confusd w other definitions (like, u wldnt call it the Marvel Cinematic Universe theory, the MCU is jst wht it is) I'm gnna call it the Multi-Ena theory! Bsclly, there's mor than 1 Ena in thise universe. But I'll get in2 a sub/partner theory tht is also possibl: ther is mor than 1 enaverse n somhow u may or may not b abl 2 travel between them

Part 3: The Multi-Ena theory

Something interesting I noticed was that the shepherds says “another ENA troublemaker?” Which definitely means more than one ENA/person has been there before.

(I blockd out the rest of the commnt not bc it ws bad, b i wantd 2 focus on this part of the commnt, but thise commnt will come up again L8r)

Not connected 2 System!Ena or the integr8ion issue I mentioned earlier, the multi-ena theory seems 2 b 1 of the top suggstd theories bc of many thngs! Bsclly n in short, thise theory believs tht in the series (or Enaverse), ther is multipl ena's! So fr i havent seen a post tht RLLY went in2 depth on thise so here is my attempt!

Evidence:

(See: above explanation on how the voic actors r credited 4 their roles individlly 2 explain my system!ena theory/intro) In episodes 1-2, Ena's diffrnt emotions/sides r creditd individually! In Temptation Stairway, Gabe n Lizzie Freeman r all creditd undr the sme nme, just as "Ena" (mening thise is a completely different Ena from the past)

Again, as said in my summry 4 Tempt8ion Stairway, thise Ena acts compltly diffrnt n is not follwng the sme "pattern" or rules as Ena did in Episodes 1-2! (Read above in my summary section) Either ther r stuff we've missd between Extinction Party n Temptation Stairway, or thise is a diffrnt Ena entirely. I'd hav 2 sy prsnlly tht I'm leanng 2wrds the latter bc of how the VA's are crdtd. but if ur not convinced, let me continu:

When we meet the Shepard in 7:52 of the episode, they say (verbatim) "Arghh... Another ENA trouble maker." which implies there r more than 1 Ena's

9:08 - 9:19 when Ena jumps in2 the "Holy Code" where we head undrwtr in2 a sea of diffrnt doors, we see floating Ena models (n the comment section seems 2 gravit8 2 callng them "dead bodies") (Honorary mention: You'll notic they glitch in2 Mannequins if u pay attention 2 them). This piec of info is Direct Evidence 2 the multi-ena theory, bc ther r Explicitly mor thn 1 ena's on screen! wht's concernng n unanswrd tho, is y do they glitch in2 mannequins? Does tht mean all the mannequins we sw on screen in the begnng of the video (n onwards) were all previously an Ena? Is it only an Ena tht can transform in2 a mannequin or cn othr chrctrs also become mannequins?

Not the strongst evidenc b i'll input it anywy: Ena's Action boxes (Like when she receivs or gives items) spell her nme her as ƎNA (with a backwrds E). The thing abt thise 1 is tht we can't compare it with Auction Day n Extinction Part bc they don't have any action boxes. BUT What we CAN compare is how she is spelled in the dialogue boxes of those speakng in diffrnt languages AND in the Credits! In Episodes 1-2, She's Spelled as Ena with this captialis8ion. In Temptation Stairway the dialogue and credits consitntly spell her as ENA in all caps. May or may not allude 2 her being diffrnt, b i will admit this is the most Strechiest piec of evidnc. Tru or not, I'd like 2 refer 2 Tempt8ion Stairway ena as TS!Ena or ƎNA, prsnlly 2 differenti8 her frm the othr episodes

Pronounci8ion: BUT 2 build on the above evidence, In the beginning of the episode, Moony DOES pronounc Ena's name in different wys a lot, startng w I-NA (ai-na), ENA (ehna), n finally JENA. And this isnt new! She’s been doing it sinc Auction Day (ee-nah/ii-na) n Extinction Party (ay-nah). Thise may or my not sggst that perhaps Moony's inconsistancy is bc these othr pronunci8ions or names cld b of other ena's she's met in the past w similr or diffrnt preferences! I’d say because of her constant switchng in the beginning of Temptation Stairway, it would lean 2wards that she may know different Ena’s @ once. Otherwise, c the Multi-Enaverse theory below

Note: Every othr charctr besides Moony (So far; Merci and the Shepard) Pronounces Ena as ehna (or ehna) so it might be that perhaps Eh-na is the universal way of pronouncng Ena?

Conlusions/thghts on this theory: I prsnlly like thise a lot!! It makes Enasonas Very Possible, b also tht any interpret8ion of Ena cn b corrct or possibl! It knda saddens me tho bc im not rlly sure if we'll ever return 2 the Ena we're used 2, I wldnt rlly want 2 b stuck w/o Sad bc I thnk her role is rlly neat n can b importnt, b im biasd. I also rlly subscribe 2 thise theory bc it means whtvr happend 2 TS!Ena ds not hav 2 be permanent in the long run; Again litrlly the only thng keepng me from gettng supr upset abt the ending of Temptation Stairway, is tht the prev ena’s r not the sme n wld possibly not do thise, or tht ther r othr ena’s out ther besides THISE episod 1, who wld nvr do tht, etc

Part 4: The Multiple Enaverses/Multi-Enaverse Theory AKA The Alternative In Defense of Moony Mispronouncing Ena’s name over and over

An alterntve 2 the Multi-Ena theory, is tht there is MORE thn 1 Enaverse! So bsclly, a multiverse theory. Primarily thise my explain Not jst Ena's sudden Shift in how diffrnt she is in thise episode b may also explain how Diffrnt Moony is actng in thise episode 2. While thise isnt the top theory i prsnlly subscribe 2 (sinc ther isnt explicit evidence besides it bein an explan8ion 4 Moony n Ena's weird/diffrnt behavior), it DOES open a lot of doors 2 intrstng things 2 thnk abt!

Bsclly Moony keeps mispronouncing Ena’s name a lot (in Tempation Stairway) n its Really Rude, esp consdrng she’s always said it properly (As in @ least 1nce in an episode n not switchng multiple times) b4! so 2 Explain her Sudden change in behavior, this is actlly a Different Moony, besides a different Ena. this is a whole different universe/timeline!

LIKE If not multiple Ena's, The different Loca8ions in Ena cn probbly b traversible across dimensions! The Holy Code may b the door 2 diffrnt enaverses. The Shepard's garden cld b an interdimensionl place tht is singular n deals w diffrnt beings passing thru! While i dnt hav mch 2 sy on thise, its RLLY Interestng 2 thnk abt

Like the Multi-Ena theory, thise also opens the doors 2 enasonas being vry possibl :^) Som ppl's evidences r all involvng Moony besides how Ena's rlly diffrnt

Moony can skateboard??

Moony's square shape hole can shrink 2 hold an item

while not strong ATM or frm wht i cn see, its still very inch restng!!! Tho I would sy it is VERY on par w the Multi-Ena theory anyway

Part 5: Honorary Mentions: Mini Theories

The Great Runas is actlly a play on the "Run As" Command! I'm not very Smart engh 2 break thise down vry well, b bsclly w all the allusion 2 "codes" n the Blood ID looking like a Chip, The Great Runas being abl 2 grant u wishes makes a lot of sense! This ws brought up 2 me from a friend (@ambercard)!

like its a command line. so then the great runas being able to grant wishes makes sense if its digital world like all the code stuff says Allows a user to run specific tools and programs with different permissions than the user's current logon provides.

Runas is a command-line tool that is built into Windows Vista. To use runas at the command line, open a command prompt, type runas with the appropriate parameters, and then press ENTER.

In the user interface for Windows Vista, the Run as… command has been changed to Run as administrator. However, you should rarely have to use the Run as administrator command because Windows Vista will automatically prompt you for an administrator password when it is needed.

and my friend who i was talking to said that probably explains what the password was for and the blood id being a login or something?

its possible using the blood id akin to using the run as administrator command since idk their name but one of the people ena met said the blood id didnt seem like her which is like. if she isnt administrator then it would make sense that using that command wouldnt match who she is

My response:

man do u realiz Ena uslly does not hav the corrct passwrd/admin privileges all the tme? Bc the guardian entity in extinction party askd her 4 1 b i guess it ws so Low Game tht it wsnt supr necsrry in the end

The Enaverse is all a computer code of some sort- most probbaly a game! AKA: This is a digital world

... If we were too treat this world as a video game this would make more sense since different play through bus and all that. Oh god this feels like a fnaf situation, taking a video that just wants to be a video and turning it into a big serious thing

Going with the whole ‘there are multiple enas representing the player’ theory, perhaps this ENA realized that she’s in a video game and isn’t taking it too well? But the game is kind of glitching out because of it.

Honorable Mentions: Random Info + Unanswered Questions

Ena seems self-aware of smth! (10:24 Ena screams "YOU'RE ALL LIVING A LIE!") May help the Run as command idea n the video game/digital reality idea! If not a video gme, they sure r Somewhere

What does the Great Runas look like?? is it the door? is ther mor thn 1 Runas?

What is Mariya n Gabo's Job? R they just like the Guardian Entity in Extinction Party but are assignd 2 this part/location of where they are?

In 6:30, wht does Ulysses mean by "Desires r never fulfilled nor quenched"? "You Will fail like the rest of them" Is he referring 2 the other Ena's that's passed by? who else have come n failed?

This Post Also brings up som good points I hvnt noticd yet!

Thise comment pretty much says everythng:

Standout things from this animation:

-This Ena switches between a male & female voice at seemingly random instead Happy speaking with a male voice and Sad speaking with a Sad voice. The text boxes noticeably refer to this Ena with a reversed E, and The Shepard says "Another Ena troublemaker", implying that there are multiple Enas. We also see some Ena corpses flickering into the mannequin bodies at one point. Third, at the end we see Ena's sad half turn from blue to yellow over the course of Ena & Moony's conversation. My personal theory is that this Ena is possibly 'broken' in some manner. -Moony either doesn't care or dosen't realize that Ena's voices aren't matching the personalities anymore. -The grey personality appears to come out when Ena gets too stressed out. Notably the transformation involves the happy half turning into static and exploding out, erasing Ena's face in the process. It also appears that some physical trauma (in this case, Brick Frog kicking Ena) is necessary to exit the grey personality, unlike the previously seen 'blackout' personalities which can possibly be switched by the other personality exerting themselves (in the auction episode, Ena enters her sad blackout/depressed personality, then switches to Happy!Ena, who apologizes to Moony about her depressed outburst). -Moony's hole is capable of closing to hold things, and she also knows how to skateboard. -Judging by Ena's reaction, Moony's transformation at the end is weird even by this universe's standards.

aaaand thats all 4 now! I really hope thats all my brain can think of skjsdhfsdfkh

Feel free 2 send me asks abt Ena theories n stuff! While this is a Comprehensiv post, it’s definitely mor focused on the Multi-Ena theory n my thghts on the episode whn it comes 2 how it affects the System Ena theory. I’m open 2 questions!!

Last Edit: Feb 19 2021 (GMT +8)

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muwur · 4 years

Text

snapchat headcanons

✧ hc’s ✧ for using snapchat w ur boi toi ft. the pretty setter squad

❧ gn reader

✎ 3.1k words

a/n: kinda a combo of how they use sc and the kinds of snaps they send you! along w wat u send them, and uh... dating stuf n shenanigans? texting/snapping habits? my fantasies? IDEK ANYMORE EOFHEFJ

this was born from the recesses of my mind , which desired nothing mor than snapchats from suga , us sending cute selfies , others bein dumb n chaotic , no context videos , n him snapping me photos of some mangoes on sale he said he’ll buy for me DXX it’s too late for me now

doing research on hq bois and surfing thru sc features (im just now realizing theres quite a bit?? im hoping i address most of them at some point lolol) instead of real life tings aHHhhhHAHA

requests: open! will be working on a suga one i got, dw, requester!

sugawara

✧ sends good morning and good night snaps

✧ so he’s rlly good at keeping streaks, probs has the longest ones (one of them being y’alls streak)

✧ posts tidbits of volleyball practice on his story every once in a while

✧ snaps you pics of his sleeping teammates when they’re coming back to school after a long day of matches , adding a single ‘❤️’ as a caption

✧ he will also create colorful masterpieces on all of them

✧ gives daichi a santa beard, tanaka a squiggly stache (i imagine it to look like spongebob n patrick’s seaweed ones now that were mEN), n kageyama sum angry brows,,, wait he already has them lolol u good der kags

✧ posts a picture of you when you’re hanging out, captioning it: “🥰“

✧ has conversations with you purely via snaps

✧ ranges from casual chats and checking up on u to crackwhoring ( ** indicates the photo, while the “” quotes indicate the caption, all snaps are italicized, otherwise its regular dialogue)

✧ suga: *peace sign* “hey sweetheart, how r u?”

✧ you: *pics of homework* “ahh, drowning in school ;-; i cant wait for this week to be over fghjkl”

✧ suga: *close up with :o on his face* “let’s study together tmrw!”

✧ or

✧ suga: *complete darkness* “its 3 am n i cant sleep”

✧ you: *the top half of your head, laying on a pillow* “ ;( aw babe. do u want me to send something to help u sleep?”

✧ suga: *still in darkness* “y u still up?? go sleep. n 🥺 yes pls”

✧ you: *snaps pics of feet* “that’ll be 50 bucks, pay up”

✧ suga: *darkness remains* “can we make a trade instead? i promise to make it worth ;)”

✧ ok now u BOTH cant sleep (im sry my crackheading be acting up around 2am eeryday, i stan a mischievous suga--)

✧ video chats (in the darkness lol) instead until you both pass out (im not in luv u r 😭)

✧ super down to take filtered selfies w you

✧ does all the silly ones with you (things like ’angry face’ or the frog one)

✧ but also rlly digs lookin cute with you using some heart crowns, y’all an aesthetic (n crakhead) duo fosho

✧ def subscribes to life hacks and tries them out himself, has a 50% success rate

kageyama

✧ doesn’t rlly use snapchat too much

✧ but when he does

✧ will either send you a picture to indicate he’s at volleyball practice (wow wat a sexi lookin gym floor)

✧ or some random picture of whatever he’s doing at the moment (*drinking milk*)

✧ this is mostly in order to save streaks

✧ he’s so bad at streaks

✧ “why does it matter?? what’s the point of sending just black screens or whatever’s in front of you at the moment??”

✧ can’t keep a consistent streak for more than 3 days and also doesn’t care (until hinata challenges him to see who can have the longer one)

✧ when you send him videos of him playing, he really focuses on them to try to improve his technique. asks you to send those vids to him (assuming u saved them, which u did)

✧ but when you look over his shoulder when he’s watching a video and give him some compliment (“i recorded at the perfect moment! that was a really good set, kageyama!”), he gets a bit flustered

✧ gets even more flustered but pretty happy whenever you post videos on your story showing karasuno winning some points with captions like:

✧ “footage of the legendary quick >.>” or “karasuno crows flyin high!” or “these bois make my heart 😭 im so proud”

✧ you WILL catch him off guard in photos, using filters that surrounds his head w/ emojis like 🥺💖🥰💘

✧ you also put these on your story (to his dismay)

✧ ppl comment on these mor than anything else (n for those who dont rlly kno kageyama, theyre kinda surprised to him like this)

✧ hinata snickers “hey kageyama you look pretty good here--”

✧ takes some selfies with you, mostly cuz you want them

✧ saves them after u send them over (n secretly cherishes them)

✧ occasionally watches his subscriptions, they’ll usually involve sports, mostly volleyball (who woulda guessed)

✧ you use his bitmoji to test out random facial expressions you would never see him wear

✧ you: “can you smile and wink like this? act like you’re the obnoxious charming guy in a shojo.”

✧ will actually attempt, but it looks so bad that you die inside and he never wants to try again cuz of ur laughing outburst (you: “😭😭 bb im sorry i couldnt help it”)

oikawa

✧ literally sends you anything and everything

✧ morning bathroom selfie to show off how good his hair came out that day, saying:

✧ “he has risen”

✧ or “i woke up like this”

✧ and my favorite, “you’re lucky you get this content for frEE”

✧ selfies with iwa, who just looks annoyed and exasperated at the camera

✧ sends you pics of his lunch and snacks (“bet u wish u had milk bread too”)

✧ always packs extra milk bread so he could convince you to stay at his practice after school--

✧ FILTERSS

✧ I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENUF

✧ will either use the filters that make him kayooottt (cute)

✧ loves the ones named ‘hearts,’ ‘soft,’ ‘peach,’ ‘butterfly cheeks,’ vsco filters LOL, etc

✧ uses ‘big mouth’ when he feelin a bit sASSY; also loves to use this one when he rants, it channels his inner valley girl

✧ sometimes he’ll be snacking or drinking something while he does so (“hey guys today im gonna eat these milk buns from my favorite bakery and this bomb orange juice and complain about this little kid who talked smack to me earlier and almost made me cry--”)

✧ takes cute selfies with you, is an aesthetic selfie king, puts them on his story to show off he’s hangin with you

✧ but on your story you only post the ones he looks bad in LOL

✧ has separate stories for his every need, some r private (and lucky you, ur included in all of them)

✧ titles them ‘mean things iwa said to me today,’ ‘ranting hotbox + mukbangs,’ ‘a day in the life of oikawa,’ ‘volleyball 🏐,’ ‘unpopular opinions,’ etc.

✧ fitting room photoshoots lol

✧ “y/n, what do you think of this??” “and this?” “oOH WHAT ABOUT THIS??”

✧ ends up calling you through video chat so you can live critique his choices

✧ “oikawa, please no, i can’t be seen with you in public if you wear those--”

✧ also changes his bitmoji’s outfits from time to time, hopes you’ll notice, but you don’t LOL (oikawa: ;((((((( )

kenma

✧ uses sc usually just to reply to messages ppl send him

✧ indifferent about streaks, but keeps a few with ppl he’s closer to

✧ mindlessly plays the snapchat games with you, finds some of them kinda cute

✧ you both made his bitmoji for him, dressing his up in the orange cat suit

✧ you also helped make kuroo’s and put his in the black cat suit to match--

✧ snaps you every time he gets a new game, starts playing it, and once he finishes

✧ started to post some gameplays and reviews on his sc story (might as well add them to sc since he was already on other social platforms), and ended up amassing a large following

✧ follows the tech and gaming stories on sc

✧ as well as the ones with cute animals--

✧ open to selfies with you, usually wears a calm expression and holds up a peace sign

✧ even occasionally sticks his tongue out

✧ his story is occasionally heavily bombarded with candids of him w/ pretty sc filters, all taken by you

✧ but of all the filters, you love using the clout glasses on him

✧ especially when he’s just minding his own business

✧ “kenma, in his tru habitat” when hes cocooned in a blanket

✧ “kenma, on his way to steal yo manz” while on his way to the bathroom

✧ “kenma, next iron chef. watch out gordon” as he’s cooking instant ramen

✧ “kenma” n das it

✧ but he thinks it meme-y so he lets you do whatever you want, kinda digs it

✧ you end up dedicating your snap story to memes of kenma and the nekoma volleyball team. ppl are in it for the shits n giggles n hot bois

✧ you later discover someone else did the same thing with their volleyball team filled with hot bois from shiratorizawa, and you befriend tendou and share funni internet tings

akaashi

✧ 99% of his photos include either you or bokuto or both

✧ bokuto spams akaashi’s story and contact list with selfies and videos of himself using weird filters, often gets you to join him

✧ has several streaks, but will send something with more substance than a black screen or his bedroom window

✧ will usually involve smthng that just happened to him or smthing he saw, like:

✧ “a kind older lady offered me some apples in return for helping her”

-or:

✧ “how do i break the news to bokuto that the yaikniku place he’s been wanting to go to for the past week ,,, is closed today”

✧ o n let’s not leave out:

✧ “is it possible to conjure a ghost using a wooden spatula, ketchup, and a chalk drawn hexagram? bokuto’s been paranoid ever since he tried last night and i dont know what to tell him. seriously, help”

✧ looks through stories occasionally, comments whenever bokuto makes questionable decisions

✧ also comments on whatever you’ve posted. his words range from “you’re cute” to “why,” depending on the content

✧ ppl know when y’all are hanging out cuz he’ll post smthing to indicate he’s with you, usually it’s some candid and you’re not paying attention

✧ appreciation posts for you as well! esp if you got him something, like onigiri or his fav, Nanohana no Karashiae , for lunch! (akaashi: *snaps a pic of his food* “thank you y/n for feeding me”)

✧ prefers video calling over texting/snapping whenever possible tho

✧ occasionally reminisces thru his sc memories

✧ enjoys the flashback feature and will send them to you and bokuto (cuz they’re about y’all anyway lolol)

✧ also has secretly saved a bunch of selfies of himself, consists of him trying out a lot of the filters (he feelin himself)

✧ you, one day, looking thru his phone and discovering them: “akaashi, you’re so pretty wtf”

✧ akaashi: “...”

koganegawa

✧ sends you selfies of him before practice

✧ during breaks

✧ and after practice, usually makes a comment about how it went for him that day like:

✧ “i hit a decent toss today and futakuchi actually complimented me!”

✧ that, or:

✧ “i got yelled at 17 times today 😢😩”

✧ has quite a few streaks, his longest ones being with you and hinata

✧ def uses filters

✧ tries out every funny one he finds and sends you videos

✧ “look y/n im an aaaaAALlliiEEENnnNNN oo oo hoo hhhooOOh”

✧ “now im a chicky nuggy!!” (chicken nugget)

✧ also enjoys the doodle feature

✧ but he uses the filter with the clout glasses unironically--

✧ usually when smth good happens to him and he feels happy and/or cool about it

✧ “just beat the boss in this game on my 69th try B)”

✧ “kogane, that’s--”

✧ plays sc games with you and thinks bitmojis r cool

✧ kinda sad he cant find a hair option that matches him tho lolol rip

✧ you: “you hair’s just,,, unique,,,”

✧ subscribed to anything sports and fitness, as well as pop culture so he can stay in the loop

✧ also watches everyone else’s stories, pointing out whenever he sees smthing cool and/or interesting

✧ “woahh, karasuno’s at nationals right now! i wish we could’ve won, but next year for sure!!”

✧ you encourage him at all his games, hyping him up irl and online

✧ “koganegawa: best setter 😍!!”

✧ luckily you didnt record the parts he completely messed up LOL

semi

✧ before going out with you, snaps you a pic of his casual outfit like:

✧ semi: “does this look ok”

✧ you: “babe you look great, tendou was just messing with you”

✧ will make unwanted appearances on tendou’s snap and complains to you about them

✧ “i didnt consent to being part of his meme page” and

✧ “okay, but he didn’t only have to share all the moments i messed up--”

✧ also indifferent about streaks but will do them

✧ sometimes sends snaps/streaks indicating he’s practicing his music

✧ when you see these you usually ask him to send you vids or if you can come over n watch

✧ initially is a bit shy about it but he loves what he does and you and knows you’re genuinely interested and supportive so he agrees

✧ secretly rlly enjoys having you as his personal audience

✧ lowkey into asmr, like the soap cutting shit as well as chewing crunchy things

✧ also watches food porn and clips of mukbangs, then can’t resist going on youtube and watching the whole thing

✧ “y/n, can we try this, it looks so good--”

✧ will also often watch oikawa’s stories, especially his ‘ranting hotbox + mukbangs,’ and makes comments about him being an idiot

✧ “this kid he’s talking about is a savage”

✧ but admits they’re quite entertaining

✧ just looks serious in all the selfies you take with him

✧ you: “can you look like you’re enjoying yourself?”

✧ semi: “i look cooler like this tho”

✧ sc memories filled with shenanigans from you and the volleyball team, doodles, and mirror selfies with him experimenting diff looks (you: “tendou, you got him way too concerned about this”)

✧ also enjoys showing off he’s with you, taking a short video of you when you hang out

✧ you: “semi, i look bad right now”

✧ semi: “but you can never look bad”

✧ you: “🥺 bb”

✧ viewers: “aw”

✧ shiratorizawa: “can he be this nice with us LOL”

shirabu

✧ his main mode of communication with you is mostly through the regular messaging app, so he doesn’t use sc too much

✧ also doesn’t care for streaks and is bad at keeping them

✧ will answer to you or his senpais rather soon tho

✧ but lets all his other notifications pile up a bit before finally going thru them

✧ goes through the snaps he receives really fast, spending like 2 seconds each to look at them cuz aint nobody got time for dat

✧ doesn’t even rlly open goshiki’s LOL

✧ you have fun using filters on him and taking videos while he’s just doing his own thing peacefully like studying

✧ it takes him a second to notice and when he finally looks up, he just gives you an exasperated look

✧ cue you cracking up with laughter bc the filter finally shows up on his face

✧ his eyes and mouth are now on mike wazowski

✧ that, or his face becomes so disturbingly moRPhed like an alien

✧ caption: “ken-chan, my future medical man 😍”

✧ “y/n, please, this is like the 7th time in the last 20 minutes--”

✧ finally convinced him to take a study break and hang out with you

✧ which usually consists of snacking and light banter while you lay your head on his lap

✧ and scrolling through snapchat stories and showing him what everyone else is up to and cool things you’re subscribed to

✧ “loooook, dr. miami’s doing another butt job! is this the line of work you’re studying so hard for?”

✧ “no, it’s really not”

✧ is actually very soft with you and likes having the photos and vids for memories

atsumu

✧ sends you snaps where his brother looks bad, captioning it:

✧ “this is evidence that im the hotter twin”

✧ likewise, osamu sends you snaps where atsumu looks even worse

✧ like, the mans passed out, looking rekt and open mouthed, drool seeping into his pillow

✧ osamu: “u still have time to break up with him”

✧ also lucky for you, atsumu also loves to take unflattering photos of you and send them to you randomly at like 2 am

✧ you: “nani tf when did you even take this??”

✧ usually posts a snap while he’s out somewhere like at a match, the gym, outside on a run, a party, or just hanging out with you or his frens

✧ however, makes sure you look good if you show up on his story cuz he wants to show you off

✧ doesn’t really care for streaks, but has a lott

✧ but also has a tON of unopened snaps

✧ is the type to send just a black screen n call it a day, or maybe spice it up by sending a pic of the sexi gym floor (a comeback) w his shoe in the corner

✧ will, however, consistently respond to you and kinda looks forward to ur snaps (secretly hopes you show ur face)

✧ but when you dont:

*in class*

✧ atsumu: *a smirk on his face* “your content’s kinda dry today”

✧ you: *your sexi desk* “my nudez ain’t free, i demand compensation”

✧ atsumu: *grasped his chin in thought, but angled the cam up bc he needa hide his phone in class lolol* “what if i... take you out on a romantic excursion”

✧ you: * your face but with ‘sausage’ filter* “🥵🥵🥵🥵 yessir, what u want”

✧ rlly only wants to have pics of your face wat a closeted sOFTIE

✧ likes to have content on his flashbacks

✧ usually has other social media sources to keep up to date with things

✧ actually rlly digs using sc filters, mostly ones that’ll make him look like a queen

✧ captions a selfie of you two like: “me >>>>>>> y/n”

✧ but nearly everyone who comments on it is like: “i think you flipped the sign, bro 🤥”

✧ judges ppl who are into soap cutting asmr (you will never hear the end of it if you also like it)

a/n: sc kinda dying for me, my use went from suga to an atsumu to like nearly nonexistent LOL

also o gawd i already have ideas here n there for a pt 2 so stay tuned fjxnwfesd hope it takes me less long cuz this one took me fkin foreva LOL

idk y i made semi like mukbangs but i feel like he’d be rlly into them--

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu reader insert #sugawara x reader #kageyama x reader #oikawa x reader #kenma x reader #akaashi x reader #koganegawa x reader #semi x reader #shirabu x reader #atsumu x reader #haikyuu headcanons

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veliseraptor · 4 years

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thinking abt JGY, esp. in the beginning & I wonder if he recognized in himself his incredible capacity for evil? & hated it - the episode where he kills the captain & NMJ catches him, JGY's face as he sits & waits for the killing stroke is weirdly hopeful, almost peaceful, of course it could be his confidence that NMJ won't follow through but I love the idea of "stop me before I become the monster because I know what I'm willing to do to survive" but then NMJ doesn't kill JGY so NMJ Has To Die

Oh boy, is it gonna be Jiggy Feelings Hour? I think it is! I mean, mostly this is going to be ‘trying to assemble my Jiggy thoughts into a coherent form, possibly, after just mostly screaming back and forth with @orodrethsgeek and @paradife-loft in DMs’ but we’ll see how it goes.

And fine, since this is a serious-ish meta-ish post I will allow him some dignity and call him by his actual name. (I want it to be clear that this is not a situation where I do this because I do not like him. I love him very much.)

I wouldn’t call it ‘capacity for evil’ (I tend to avoid using ‘evil’ w/r/t describing people in general; just a preference, mostly). I think there’s a few things going on with Jin Meng Guangyao (I mean, there’s a lot of things, but let’s start with a few of them).

One: A whole lot of anger and frustration, very thoroughly bottled up because he has internalized a kind of learned submissiveness as a coping mechanism related to his status, which he hates but also feels very stuck in. So he bottles up his resentment under a smile because there’s no point in lashing out, lashing out won’t get him anywhere but in trouble (he’s not strong in cultivation, he’s lower status, his position is always precarious, his last attempt to assert himself pre-canon ended in getting kicked down a whole lot of stairs).

But it turns out that when you’re very angry, that anger doesn’t just go away when you suppress it. It just kind of…stays there. And builds, and feeds on itself, and gets bigger, which means more to suppress, but there’s still no real way to express it that’s going to work out.

Two: An excruciating awareness of his double-bind with respect to perception. He talks about this a lot, especially during the times he confronts Nie Mingjue - about how his options are limited because of his status and origins. No matter what he does, on some level he’s always going to be an outsider. There’s this sense that he just can’t win - that regardless of how he plays the game it’s going to be the wrong way. But he can’t, or won’t, opt out.

Or, because @paradife-loft put this better in their fic so I’m gonna go ahead and quote it:

All the hard work in the world, all the pleasant faces and pleasant words you’ve trapped yourself behind cannot make them respect you. They can’t even make you respect you; more like the opposite, because his words still ring in your ears, that appeasement is dishonesty, that dishonesty is the mark of a man with no strength of character who deserves nothing.

His berserk button - the ‘son of a prostitute’ - is always about that reminder that regardless of where he’s standing, how well he’s behaving, the role he’s playing, ultimately that’s what people are going to remember.

Three: A jacked up sense of how agency works: either he has all of it or he has none of it. Which means that either he is in control of everyone, all the time - the manipulative puppet master - or he has no power and is vulnerable to attack from anyone who wants to come at him. So in order to be safe he has to be able to, and ready to, cut down anyone who tries to undercut him. Basically:

This is not, obviously, actually how it works, but it means that in a quest to try to have agency/control over his own life, he ends up stepping on everyone else’s in the process.

But to actually get back to the point of your question, after what has probably felt like a bit of a digression - I don’t think it’s so much that he wants to die - I think JGY is a survivor. But I do think there’s a part of JGY that…tests people, and I think there’s a level of expecting violence and betrayal and retaliation. Later on, when he’s in a position to react first, that’s what he does - but in that moment I think there’s an amount of satisfaction because there, see, this is the truth of the relationship that seemed like a good one, this is what it ultimately comes down to.

All Nie Mingjue’s support, and it breaks down so fast. (Yes, yes, ‘murder’ and ‘grievous bodily harm’ but really it was for a good cause. Even if probably also a little satisfying on a personal level.)

There’s a lot of what JGY does that’s a self-fulfilling prophecy, and a tangle of self-justification that is very circular. I don’t think that JGY thinks he’s ‘right’ in terms of his actions being just, or good - I think JGY perceives the world as not being just or good ever and he’s less of a hypocrite about it as far as ‘doing what’s necessary to climb the ladder and have some kind of security.’ Sure, maybe he’s not playing fair, but who is?

There’s so much about the cultivation world in The Untamed that’s tied up in themes of hypocrisy and reputation and perception, and those are all things that JGY is excruciatingly conscious of. He very much lives at the nexus of those things. He knows what he’s doing, and he knows that it’s ‘wrong’ in a sense - that just doesn’t matter, because like everyone else (he believes), he’s just doing what he needs to do to survive.

#anonymous #conversating #long post for ts #i'm not sure this is coherent at all! but i tried #aggressively headcanons #the sad queer cultivators show #i love jiggy very much. he's a mess.

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