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threecrowsinatrenchcoat · 3 years

Text

Plant Your Hope With Good Seeds

Dukeceit Week Day 3: Snakes/Bugs

Remus and Janus break up. But literally everyone knows that's not what they want. Everyone, including their plants.

AO3 Link: [here]

Word Count: 4337

Warnings: n/a

@dukeceitweek <3

Unknown Number

hey so i kno i said i wouldnt text u but rupert isnt doin good. can i bring him back? he misses u

Janus stared at the text for several minutes. Rupert was, of course, the Monstera Variegata that he and Remus had raised together all the way from propagation. It had been one of the pride and joys of their plant collection. Losing Rupert in the split had hurt almost as much as losing Remus.

...Almost.

Janus

Is it getting enough light? Remember it needed the grow light even next to the window.

Janus texted back against his better judgement. He and Remus were broken up. They’d agreed not to text for a while. They’d agreed to give each other space, get used to being apart.

It sucked, though. The apartment felt empty without Remus and half their plant collection.

Unknown Number

ya i kno. but i don’t have any south facign windows here. our place is better

Unknown Number

i mean ur place

Janus sighed morosely. Well, if it was for Rupert…

Janus

Fine. Rupert can come back.

Unknown Number

yay! ill be in town this weekend. ill bring him ok?

Janus

Ok.

And then Janus promptly threw his phone across the room.

Because here’s the thing. Janus and Remus were broken up. Remus had moved eight hours away and everything. He’d been accepted into the Nuclear Engineering graduate program a state away, and they had both heard too many horror stories about long-distance relationships to brother trying. So they’d had a very civil and mutual split. Janus kept the apartment. Remus took the TV. And they’d divided their plant family between them: they each kept their favorites, and Remus had taken the hardier plants, while Janus kept the ones that were likely not to survive an interstate move.

And then… Remus left.

And Janus had not immediately wanted him back. Not at all.

(And, of course, Janus was lying to himself.)

Remus texted him Saturday morning that he was on his way, and Janus spent the first few hours of the wait stress-cleaning. He then checked on every single plant in the apartment. Watered the ones that needed it. Rotated some of the more vivacious growers so that they wouldn’t lean full-body toward their light source. Moved his small army of Sansevierias out to the apartment balcony for some extra sun.

Then, when all that still failed to fill up the entire eight hours of waiting, he started stress-cooking. So by the time Remus texted that he’d just gotten off the highway, Janus had himself a pot of minestrone soup simmering on the stove, a tray of made-from-scratch lasagna in the oven, and was mixing up a batch of double chocolate chip cookies.

There was no way he was going to eat all this food himself, he realized. He was so used to booking big meals like this, because Remus ate like he was three people. And lasagna was his favorite.

“Oh, Jake, what am I doing?” he groaned to the N’Joy Pothos that cascaded down the side of the refrigerator. And then his doorbell rang.

Janus opened the door to find Remus, dancing awkwardly from foot to foot, with his face half-hidden behind the green-and-white leaves of Rupert.

“...Hey,” Remus said, sounding sheepish. Janus’ heart clenched.

“Hi,” he said. They stood there in the doorway for a full minute before Janus stepped back and motioned for Remus to follow. Remus hesitated, but obeyed.

“Uh… I’ll just…” Remus looked around. Janus hated how uncomfortable he looked. Until about two weeks ago, this had been Remus’ apartment, too. “Can I put him in his old spot?”

“Sure,” Janus replied with a nod. Rupert’s old spot had been in the bedroom, where the big, beautiful south-facing window let in a ton of light. He’d moved Venus de Milos, his Marble Queen Pothos, and La Hoya Jackson, the finicky Hoya Carnosa that Remus had wanted but didn’t expect to make the 8-hour drive without going into shock, to free up Rupert’s spot. Remus hesitated again, before he nodded awkwardly and wandered off to the bedroom, all three feet of plant and two gallons of soil in tow. Janus went to the oven and took out the lasagna.

“Howl looks good,” Remus said when he came back into the kitchen. Janus glanced up from where he was laying balls of cookie dough out onto baking sheets.

“Thank you,” he replied. Howl was their dramatic fiddle leaf fig tree, which had decided to throw a fit just before Remus left. “I switched it to a terracotta pot with peat moss and pearlite, and doubled its water intake. It seems to be tolerating it well.”

“Good.” There was a long pause. Then,” How are you?”

Janus looked back to the cookies. “I’m doing well,” he lied. “And you? Do you start class soon?”

“Next week,” Remus answered. “And, uh. Yeah, I’m doin’ good.” Another long pause. “Uh… I’ll just. Head out, I guess.”

“You could stay,” Janus blurted out. Shit. “For dinner, I mean.” He gestured to the tray of lasagna, fresh from the oven. “If you want.”

Remus gave him an uncharacteristically shy smile, then nodded slowly. He didn’t say anything, though, so Janus just gestured for him to take a seat at the table. And then he joined him, a plate of lasagna for each of them.

“So tell me, how’s living with Roman again?” Janus asked, a few bites into the meal, because he could not take the awkward silence a moment longer.

“It’s ok,” Remus answered. He shoveled another forkful of lasagna into his mouth. “This is really good, Jan.”

Janus smiled softly. “Thank you.” A pause. “Roman doesn’t mind all the plants?”

“Nah, he’s dating this guy Patton who apparently loves plants, so the apartment being full of houseplants is a huge plus to him now.”

“Good for him.” The oven timer went off, startling him slightly. He started to get up, but Remus waved him off.

“I got ‘em, you did all the cooking.”

Janus didn’t protest. Remus got up and took the cookies out of the oven. And he even moved them to a cooling rack like Janus had taught him to do. He came back to the table.

“How’s work?”

Janus sighed. “Oh, terrible as always,” he answered. “I really must start looking for a new job.”

“Finally getting fed up?” Remus teased. Janus rolled his eyes. More seriously, Remus continued, “You deserve better, Jan. You gotta find some place that treats you right and pays you what you’re worth.”

“Thank you, Remus.”

“And hey, just sayin’, I still think you’d make an excellent stripper.”

Janus snorted at that. “I haven’t fully ruled out that particular career change.”

They fell easily back into their usual banter, lingering late into the night over a dessert of milk and cookies. It was pushing 10pm when Remus glanced at his phone and cursed softly. Janus glanced at his phone as well.

“Ah, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to keep you so late,” he said. Remus shrugged.

“Nah, it’s cool. Thanks for dinner, Jan. It was real good, as always.”

“Where are you staying?”

“Uh… well, the plan was to stay with Logan, but I guess he had some kind of family emergency, so I don’t wanna trouble him. I’ll probably see if I can find a hotel room.”

Janus’ brow furrowed at that. “Why don’t you just stay here?”

“Oh, uh. I don’t wanna trouble you. I kinda feel like I already overstayed my welcome a bit?”

“Nonsense. A hotel room will cost you at least $100 for the night, and that’s simply ridiculous,” Janus insisted. “You should just stay here.”

Remus worried at his lip, which Janus knew meant he was mulling over his options. Then, he nodded. “If it’s not a bother?”

“Of course not. You’re not a bother, Remus.”

Remus’ eyes softened, and he smiled. “Ok. Thank you. Oh… lemmie go get my overnight back outta my truck.”

When Remus came back inside, Janus had just about finished making up the couch.

“Hey, you don’t gotta get all fancy,” Remus teased. “You know I can sleep basically anywhere.”

“This is for me,” Janus replied. He fluffed up one of the pillows a bit more. “You take the bed.”

An odd look flashed across Remus’ face. “No way, Jan. I’m good on the couch.”

“Remus, you just drove eight hours, and you’re doing it again tomorrow. I am not letting you fuck up your back.”

‘I don’t-”

“Yes you do, no matter how often you say you can sleep anywhere,” Janus scoffed. “You can’t lie to me.”

Remus’ eyes softened, and after a moment, he sighed. “Ok, Jan. But what about you?”

“I’ll be fine.”

“You hate sleeping on couches.”

“It’s only one night-”

“And don’t you work tomorrow?”

“Yes, but-”

“You’re going to be so grumpy at work without a proper night’s sleep.”

“I’m usually grumpy at work anyway,” Janus pointed out. Remus snorted.

“Ok, that’s true. But I don’t want you to be even grumpier,” he said. “Let’s just share the bed.”

Janus eyed him for a moment. This was a terrible idea. They should not do this.

“Ok,” Janus said anyway.

They got ready for bed in awkward silence, which just made Janus miss Remus’ long, rambling chatter that much more. When Janus finished in the bathroom, he found Remus sitting gingerly on what used to be his side of the bed. Janus came over and sat down on the other side.

“Hey, uh… thanks,” Remus said. “For lettin’ me stay.”

“Of course,” Janus answered. “I… I still think of you as a friend, Remus.”

At that. Remus grimaced slightly. He didn’t say anything, seeming unable to find the right words. Before he could, Janus pulled back the top blankets on the bed and laid down. After a moment, Remus did the same.

“Good night, Remus,” Janus said quietly.

“...Good night, Janus,” Remus answered. Then he reached over and shut off the light.

Remus played that night over and over in his head in the days after he got home, and each and every time, he was just as stumped.

He knew, in his brain, why he and Janus had broken up. It had been the only thing that made sense at the time, when the facts were just that Remus was moving away to pursue a lifelong dream, and Janus would never ever try to stop him from doing so. So they broke up. It made sense… right?

But… That morning, he’d woken up to Janus curled up in his arms, face smushed against Remus’ neck, and… Remus had completely forgotten why they had even broken up in the first place.

Remus was back at Roman’s apartment, now. Eight hours away in his own cold bed, arms empty of the man he loved, just staring at the ceiling. A sharp knock on his door snapped him out of his daze.

“Rise and shine, Sleeping Beauty,” Roman called. “Don’t you have class in like an hour?”

“Fuck!” Remus scrambled to get up, but succeeded only in rolling out of the bed.

“Don’t forget to lock the door when you leave,” Roman added. Clearly he was unconcerned by the loud “thump” of a body hitting the floor.

“Yup, got it,” Remus groaned in reply. He staggered, successfully this time, to his feet.

Getting dressed was a rushed affair of ‘grab whatever’s closest,’ and soon he emerged from the bedroom with one shoe on, the other in his hand, and his backpack slung over one shoulder. He rushed into the kitchen to grab the travel mug of coffee Janus always set out for him in the mornings. And then the realization hit: Janus didn’t live here.

Remus dropped his shoe.

The rest of the day went about as well as it could have gone without any coffee- that is to say, terribly. He got lost trying to get to campus, then he got lost again trying to get to class. Then he got stuck in traffic on the way back to Roman’s apartment. And then, to top it all off, the grocery store had been out of his favorite chips.

So here he was, mopey and chip-less, and fucking exhausted. He dumped his backpack and collapsed face-first onto the couch. Roman, who happened to be sitting on said couch, made a noise of protest.

“Move, I need to sulk,” Remus mumbled, though his voice was thoroughly muffled by Roman’s thigh, since that was where his face had landed.

“What on earth do you need to sulk for?” Roman asked incredulously. He moved to shove Remus off of him, but Remus went full ragdoll, and Roman couldn’t do a damn thing. “You are a grown man, you know.”

Remus turned his head just enough to stick his tongue out at Roman. Roman stuck his tongue out back.

“I had a terrible day, I earned a good sulk.”

“Didn’t like your classes?”

“Nah, they were great.”

“Professors?”

“Great.”

“Classmates?”

“Great.”

“Then Zeus Almighty, what are you so mopey-dopey about?” Roman remanded.

Remus squirmed around so he was laying on his back, head still in Roman’s lap, to look up at his brother. “So… uh… you promise not to get all, like. I told you so and shit?”

“You miss Janus!”

“No! I-”

“You do!” Roman crowed triumphantly. Remus rolled onto his side so he didn’t have to look at his brother’s dumb gloaty face.

“...Maybe,” he groaned. Abruptly, he clamored to his feet and started for the stairs. “I gotta go build a chair.”

“Carpentry won’t solve your relationship problems,” Roman called after him.

“I know,” Remus called back. “Wrong type of wood.” If Roman had a response to that, Remus was already out the door and didn’t have to hear it.

Patton found him out in front of the apartment building some time later, a jigsaw in hand, and a pile of cut wooden dowels at his feet.

“Hey, kiddo, what are you up to?”

Remus looked up from where he was balancing a plank of wood precariously across a milk crate, because his work table was one of the things he’d had to leave behind at Janus’ place.

“Oh, hey. Ro-bro’s upstairs.”

Patton gave him the sort of smile teachers gave to the kid they caught eating glue for the fourth time. “That doesn’t look super safe. Do you want any help?”

Remus took in Patton’s soft blue sweater and the dad-jeans from the nicer end of his closet, as well as the reusable grocery store bag that smelled suspiciously like some kind of lovely home-cooked meal; he shook his head. “You look dressed for a date night,” he said. “I don’t wanna fuck up two relationships this week.”

Patton’s eyes, impossibly, got even bigger and softer than they normally were, which honestly was quite the feat. He walked over to the stairs but, instead of making his way up to Roman’s apartment, he plopped down on the third step, facing Remus. Remus stared, bewildered.

“Uh, what’chu doin’ there, pops?”

“Well, it just sounded like you needed to talk,” Patton replied cheerfully. “So here I am.”

Remus stared a moment longer, somehow even more bewildered than before. “Uh…”

“I know I haven’t known you very long,” Patton continued. “But something tells me you’re the type of person who busts out the power tools when you’re upset.”

“How the hell can you tell that?”

Patton glanced over his shoulder, then leaned forward slightly. “Because,” he said, voice lowered conspiratorially. “I’m like that too.”

Remus blinked. “You?”

“Yup! I replaced all the tables and chairs in my house with ones I made myself after my last breakup,” Patton giggled. “Only two of them collapsed when I sat in them, too!”

Remus glanced down at the jigsaw in his hands, and then he sighed. He set it down, and went to sit next to Patton on the steps.

“Ok, well. Yeah, maybe I’m kinda upset.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Yeah? No? Maybe?”

“Yup, those are your three options!” Patton teased. Remus rolled his eyes.

“Ok, fine. You win, daddy-o. I’m upset because I miss my boyfriend. Or, well, my ex-boyfriend. I want him to be my boyfriend again.”

“Have you told him that?”

“Of course not,” Remus whined.

“Why not?”

“Because… I mean. It wouldn’t change anything. I still moved away. And I don’t even know if he’d want to be my boyfriend again either. Maybe he’s happier now.”

“You don’t know that,” Patton said gently. “Sure, maybe the circumstances aren’t the best right now, but if you both want it, things have a funny way of working out. But you have to talk to him.”

“I…” Remus paused. And then he sighed deeply. “I guess you’re right. Hey thanks, that did actually sorta help.”

Patton offered him a gentle smile. “Of course, Remus! Any time!”

“Hey!”

They both turned to see Roman standing at the top of the stairs, arms crossed.

“My own brother, hogging my boyfriend like this! The betrayal-”

“Relax, Ro, he’s not my type,” Remus shot back. “I prefer sarcastic little menaces.”

Patton giggled at that. He stood up and patted Remus on the shoulder. “I hope things work out,” he said. Remus smiled back.

“Yeah, I hope so too.”

Really, he just wanted Janus to be happy. Ideally with him, but if Janus was happier without him, well… so be it.

- - -

Janus was miserable.

“Dude, c’mon,” Virgil grumbled, immediately upon seeing the state of the apartment. “You’ve been watering your plants and filling the humidifiers, but you can’t be bothered to throw out your gross pizza boxes?” A pause. “Wait, you don’t even like pizza, what the hell.”

Janus just shrugged. After letting Virgil and Logan into the apartment, he’d gone straight back into blanket-burrito-on-the-couch mode. And really, he’d only bothered to get up and let them inside in the first place because Virgil had threatened to axe down the door- and Janus knew for a fact that Virgil owned multiple axes.

“I believe he is engaging in what is described as ‘emotional eating,’ or using food as a coping mechanism in a time of stress and emotional turmoil,” Logan said helpfully. Virgil just huffed.

“That’s fine and all, but Jesus Christ, dude.” He gestured around the livingroom where… ok, yeah, it was a mess.

“Did you two come here just to insult me?” Janus grumbled. His face was half-mashed into a pillow, though, so who knows how much of that was actually discernible.

“We came to make sure you were still alive,” Virgil snapped, indicating that at least most of what Janus had said was discernible. “You weren’t answering any texts.”

“Yes, and you called out of work three days in a row,” Logan added. “We are concerned for you, Janus.”

“I’m perfectly fine,” Janus lied from the comfort of his depression blanket burrito. He was not particularly surprised when neither Virgil or Logan looked even remotely convinced.

“Alright, drastic measure time,” Virgil growled. He walked over to the window, and picked up the young Burgundy Rubber Tree Janus had yet to name. Janus sat bolt upright.

“Virgil? Don’t you dare-”

Virgil walked past him and vanished down the hall. When he came back, his hands were empty, and he had a smirk on his face.

“Oh, fuck you,” Janus hissed. He dragged himself up off the couch to go rescue the poor thing, finding it stashed in the dark, windowless bathroom. When he came back to the livingroom, Virgil and Logan were sprawled across the couch.

“Ha ha, very funny.” Janus set the rubber tree back on the windowsill alongside the Snake Plant Army. “Ok, I’m up. Are you heathens happy now?”

“I take offense to that,” Logan muttered, while Virgil just crossed his arms and said, curtly, “Spill it.”

“Spill what?”

“Why are you so upset?”

“I’m not upset-”

“Falsehood,” Logan interrupted. “I have known you since high school, Janus, and I have never seen you like this before. It is highly alarming.”

“Is this about Remus?” Virgil asked.

“No,” Janus said immediately. “Of course not.”

Virgil and Logan exchanged a Look. Janus groaned.

“Fuck. Ok, fine. Maybe it is.”

“Was that so hard?” Virgil asked.

“Yes.”

“You-”

“Janus,” Logan interrupted Virgil’s retort. “It is my understanding that emotional distress is often alleviated through, as they say, ‘talking it out.’ It is clear you are not handling the break-up as well as you initially believed-”

“Of course I’m not!” Janus snapped. He took a deep breath, and turned back to the plants on his windowsill. Kaa, the Sansevieria Moonshine Remus had gotten for Janus as an anniversary present last year, was already leaning slightly toward the window again. He rotated it, and a few of the other snake plants on the sill. And then he realized the others had been quiet for far too long. He turned to find them both watching him with sympathetic expressions. “What?”

“Keep going,” Virgil prompted. Janus sighed. He felt exhausted.

“Of course I’m not,” he said again. “Because I love Remus.”

“And?” Virgil prompted.

“...And I didn’t want us to break up,” he finished, feeling glum. Wordlessly, Virgil stood up, and approached Janus, arms out. Janus stepped into the embrace. Nobody said anything; Janus didn’t cry, but he stood there for a long time. Then, he stepped back.

“Thank you,” he said, and he meant it. Virgil gave him a small smile. Logan cocked his head, seeming confused.

“I don’t understand. You just… needed a hug?”

“Hugs are great, Logan,” Virgil replied. “You should try them sometime- hey, where are you going?”

Janus strode past them both, beelining for his bedroom to find his laptop. Over his shoulder, he answered, “To fill out some job applications.”

- - -

Remus was outside building a new bookshelf- because Patton was moving in, and Roman's teenie-tiny sad little excuse for a bookshelf, which held only Disney DVDs and no actual books, wouldn’t suffice for all of Patton’s cookbooks- when his phone rang. Which was weird, because nobody ever called him, because he never fucking answered.

“Not interested, Mr. Spam Man,” he crooned over the sound of the generic iPhone ringtone. He was learning how to do kerf bending for this bookcase, and goddamn it he wasn’t going to be distracted by-

His phone started ringing again. He swore and ripped off his gloves to silence his phone. But as he did so, he realized the number flashing across his screen was a familiar one.

“Janus? Are you ok?” he answered the call, half panicked, because Janus hated phone calls almost as much as he did.

“Hi. Yes, everything’s fine.” Janus sounded slightly hysterical, which made Remus feel even more frantic. “Where are you?”

“I’m at Roman’s. Are you sure you’re ok-”

“Great, don’t leave. I’ll be right there.”

“What does that mean-” Remus demanded, but the line was already dead. Remus swore again. He briefly considered calling him back, because what the actual fuck was that all about, but he was only about 30 seconds into that brief consideration before a familiar car tearing through the apartment complex parking lot caught his attention. He quickly brushed as much of the sawdust off his clothes as he could because holy shit Janus had just parked right there in front of Roman’s apartment.

Remus watched, dumbfounded, as Janus scrambled out of his car- dressed in his very nice black suit and pale yellow button-up- and came running across the lawn toward where Remus was working. He had a tiny plant clutched to his chest.

“Uh, Jan, you good?” Remus asked. Janus stopped in front of him and doubled over, breathless, for a few moments. Then, he straightened up, and fixed Remus with a look of sheer determination.

“Remus. I want to get back together.”

Remus’ heart, the traitorous bastard, leaped up into his throat and blocked all his words from coming out.

“It’s… it’s ok if you don’t want that,” Janus continued. His look of determination faltered slightly. “It’s ok. But I needed to tell you. Because I love you, so much. And I… I didn’t want you to think I didn’t, even if you don't-”

Remus found his words abruptly. “Jan, fuck! I do! I do love you. I never stopped loving you. All I want is to be with you.”

Janus’ eyes softened. “Really?”

“Really.”

“Good, because I’ve just been offered a job here.”

Remus choked. Janus was eyeing him smugly. “You. Just like that, you got a job here?”

“Just like that,” Janus grinned. “I just came from the interview. They offered me a position on the spot.”

Remus couldn't help himself any longer. He lurched forward and pulled Janus tightly into his arms.

“Hey, be careful,” Janus said, though he made absolutely no effort to get out of Remus’ embrace. “You’ll crush our new son.”

Remus pulled back just enough to look at the small plant Janus held in his hands, and only then did his brain register what it was.

“Is! Is that-”

“Yes,” Janus replied, holding up the tiny Drosera Capensis seedling. Remus had wanted one of these for ages.

“For me?”

“Well, for us, ideally,” Janus answered, with a shy smile. “But, mostly for you, yes.”

Remus gently plucked the baby octopus plant- their new son!- from Janus’ hands, and placed it carefully on top of the milk crate that was serving as his carpentry workbench. Then, he hoisted Janus up off the ground and spun him around.

“Oh- Re-” Janus exclaimed, though he was laughing. “Put me down!”

“No!” Remus trilled. He spun Janus around once more. Then he just stood there, holding Janus, gazing up at him. Janus’ eyes grew soft. Slowly, he carded his fingers through Remus’ hair.

“Hey,” Janus said.

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

Remus set Janus down, but kept his arms still wrapped tightly around him. His heart felt warm.

“Hey.”

Janus looked up at him. “Yeah?”

“I love you, too.”

#dukeceit #dukeceitweek #remus sanders #janus sanders #sanders sides #sanders sides fic #kye writes

42 notes · View notes

thepoodlepack · 3 years

Note

What's wrong with goldenpoodles? I'm genuinely curious because almost all of my dogs are mixed breeds and behave fine. So I'm curious if there's something else I'm missing

jeez this feels like bait but u kno what, you got me

alright, so it goes like this. the doodle really began with a guy in australia being like i need the temperament of a lab for a guide dog but these ppl are allergic to dogs, so i need a poodle bc they have hair, not fur. so he bred em together. years later he’s like damn that was a mistake.

now, why, exactly? alright so first of all he only needed that mix bc labs on average tend to adapt better to situations that are largely exclusive to service dog work than poodles do. i can go into what this means at a later date, but that’s basically how it is. but either way, people jumped on this creation and it kinda spiraled out of control. soon, poodles were being bred by everyone and every breed. suddenly, they were a marketing scam more then they were a dog breed.

oh theyre hypoallergenic! all of them, all the time cause zero allergies! look theyre so much better than poodles! theyre friendly and easy to train, not like poodles of course, just like labs! they’re better than labs bc none of them shed, ever! they’re super healthy bc breeding labs and poodles together wipes out all their health problems, of course!

lies, lies lies. the aussie guy, whose name i’m not going to look up bc i’m lazy but who you can find if you google creator of doodles, straight up says that even the first litter(s) of labradoodles he bred had puppies that the people he bred them for were allergic to. he very carefully tested the litter and the reaction the person had before placing a puppy that was not going to hurt them.

think of the punnet squares we all learned about in 5th grade science class. you draw the squares and one parent has two fur genes and the other parent has two hair genes and what do you get? well if you have four puppies, one might have hairhair and the next one might have hairfur and the next one might have furhair and the next one might have furfur. and so guess what? only hairhair pup is going to be the best choice for allergic people. additionally, you can see why the non-shedding thing can be bullshit, and that in particular is also a guessing game. you may be able to test allergy sufferers against the pups, but that does not necessarily mean they won’t shed. hairfur, for example, may be a good choice for some allergic people, but perhaps they’ve got just enough fur to shed anyway. also, lets look at salukis (and frankly, most long-haired sighthounds). salukis are still considered dogs with fur, not hair. they also still shed, even though it’s just a little. and yet they’re still considered good for allergy sufferers.

(ps poodles do actually shed. but they shed like humans shed. your hair comes out, doesn’t it? like, esp folks with long hair, aren’t people always complaining how you clog the shower drain? yeah, like that. ALSO obviously the situation is more complicated then super simple punnet squares and as an ex-groomer i have something to say about doodle coats but i’m going to save that for later, put a pin in it.)

oh and wait a hot minute there. i said best choice, didn’t i, not hypoallergenic. well, that’s because no dog is hypoallergenic. poodles, and a few other dog breeds, they have hair, like we do. but the thing is both humans and breeds with hair still produce the dander, though they’re different kinds. breeds with hair happen to produce the least amount possible that dogs can produce, which is why they’re a better choice for allergy sufferers, but that’s still not a guarantee. my roommate Dakota is allergic to dogs. if i don’t wash my dogs for an extended period of time (which has never happened, ever, in my life, idk what ur talking about), thus giving the chance for the dander my dogs still produce, he will have a very, very mild reaction when touching them. it can be countered by him washing his hands after touching them and also me just giving them a fucking bath, i need to stop forgetting, but still, there you go. ALSO people might not be allergic to dogs bc of their dander. they might be allergic to the saliva of dogs, which poodles or any other breed with hair still produces about the same as other dogs. so, yeah, not hypoallergenic, not at all.

the people who taut their hypoallergenic dogs for sale largely don’t do the testing required to check if they’re actually providing a dog to someone who won’t react to it. not acceptable at all.

so, labs are friendly and easy to train right? not at all like poodles, right? no. absolutely incorrect. some labs are friendly and easy to train. some labs, a lot of them when they’re puppies, are nightmare fuel. personally, i have a theory that everyone’s vision of labs in their heads are either a) service dogs or b) those old labs who are slightly pudgy (or morbidly obsess, which is a different topic) and who are graying in the face and just want to lounge around because they’re seniors now. alright, so here’s why thats bad. labs are a working breed. a retrieving breed. they’re supposed to be bulky and strong and driven. service dogs are highly trained, to a point that most pet dogs will never see, and if you see them with their actual disabled handler, they’ll probably be around 2.5 yrs of age and out of their most wild days. old labs are well. old. sleepy. maybe a bit achey. and well out of their most wild days. oh, and it’s the same type of thing with goldens by the way, the other most popular doodle type. poodles are also easy to train, especially if their parents have a decent temperament. they’re all about equal if you actually start training them when they’re puppies and just pay for some training classes, like everyone should. in the puppy classes i’m in right now, Euphoria is leaps and bounds ahead of doodles, goldens, and labs that are her age or older. I train her properly and she’s got amazing parents. that’s it, that’s the trick. not breed, not necessarily, and def not in this case.

I am once again going to say that labs and goldens are more often used as service dogs than poodles because of their adaptability, but it’s the ability to adapt to situations that most pet dogs will never have to worry about.

jeez this is a long post. i’ve still got more to cover too. alright, on to super healthy, or “hybrid vigor” as the nerds call it. uhh, it’s bullshit. thank u for ur time.

okay, but actually why on gods green earth would breeding two completely different breeds with little to no research make them super healthy? now i want to preface this with i’m (generally) pro-outcross projects. Euphoria’s dad is half mini poodle and half standard poodle, which isn’t technically an outcross bc all the variations are of the same breed, but if we’re going by genetic diversity alone minis and standards are different enough to actually be different breeds.

so, to be clear, outcrosses, given the proper thought and planning: good, results in healthier dogs (see: lua dals). randomly breeding two very different breeds together with no planning other than to sell the puppies to randos who won’t continue the outcross: bad. especially when you’re doing it to cash in and don’t health test at all, or don’t health test the major health problems with both breeds (if you’re doing an f2 breeding or anything like that). no the poodle’s health problems don’t get canceled out by the goldens or labs or whatever the other party’s health problems are, and vice versa. and yeah, i’ve looked at a lot of doodle breeder’s websites and yeah, most of them don’t health test at all, or at least don’t health test properly. do you know i own one doodle and currently live with another? yeah, i got them both from breeders and do you know how much health testing their parents got? if your answer is none, good job, you’ve been paying attention. in my defense, i was like 13, i didn’t know what i was doing.

alright, so those are the big points. this is kinda gonna be just... a mix of my other complaints. here we go, hope you’re ready for more. argument the first: i feel like it’s pretty disrespectful to reputable breeders. now, i actually have two reasons why that is. reason one: most reputable poodle breeders don’t want their breeding stock bred with other breeds, for various reasons. i’ve even met a few who used to be okay with it and then as the doodle scam got bigger and more out of control, they stopped being okay with it, even to the breeders who they had been fine with it in the past. that means a lot of doodle breeders out there have their breeding stock because they scammed poodle breeders into giving them pet quality, not breeding quality, dogs or because they’re getting their stock from non-reputable breeders. i also feel it’s disrespectful to breeders who are actually trying to create new breeds. quite frankly, a breed with the size, strength, and adaptability of a lab or golden that doesn’t shed and that has the train-ability of a poodle, lab, or golden sounds pretty interesting to me. did you know you can actually make that breed? and it wouldn’t be a cross with unpredictable... well, everything. it would actually be a true dog breed.

Look at Silken Windhounds and Biewer Terriers who began both development in the 1980s. Biewer Terriers were recognized by the AKC this year, and Silken Windhounds still haven’t been. And yeah, that’s the problem isn’t it? Making a real new breed takes a lot of time, planning, and care. People would rather just cash in. I think it’s sad and I think it’s disrespectful to the breeders who do work so hard to make actual new breeds.

and finally, unpin being an ex-groomer goddamnit. guess what? doodles are awful to groom! they’re terrible on the grooming tables because people want to have in both ways: they want a dog that doesnt shed at all and they want a dog who doesn’t need to be groomed. well guess what, that dog doesn’t exist and you can have it only one way. and also, bring back the goddamn punnet squares because a lot of doodles have awful coats. if you have hairfur and furhair over there, guess what, their coat fucking sucks bc it’s not meant to be like that. it wants to mat bc hair but also it wants the mats to slide out bc short-ish fur but its too thick for the mats to slide out bc thick hair. and yes its more complicated then this and that means its often more awful then this. its awful, it makes me want to cry. and maybe it’s slightly easier to get away with it with a shorthaired dog like a lab, or, you know what, even a golden, okay, even a slightly long haired dog like a golden but people are doodling akitas? border collies? bernese fucking mountain dogs? i am crying. i am crying right now as i type this.

lets do a sum up to this disaster of a post. look, i don’t go out there attacking or yelling at every doodle or every doodle owner i see, alright? or any of them really. i might engage in conversation to one that’s interested, but that’s it. i love my doodly Isis, okay? shes tiny and she’s adorable and I love her more than life and i will never, ever get another doodle. i don’t like the way they’ve gotten so prolific, i don’t like the reasons they’re now widespread, and i don’t like almost all of the people that create them, including the ones i’ve literally given my (parents) money to in the past. i wish they were better but i just cannot approve of them, especially not in the environment they exist in now. that said, i do support them in their original use case as assistance dogs, and i do not care about them if they’re shelter dogs.

#long post #anti doodle #text #my post #yes this took me like an hour #yes i do hate myself for it #Anonymous #oh anon im being grumpy mostly for comedy thats only funny to me #you're fine as long as you werent trying to bait me

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yuzenji-archive · 4 years

Note

Can you please do hcs of atsumu, sakusa, ushiwaka and osamu with a really small and timid s/o? they really dislike crowds or anything that makes them feel unsafe and one day, they accidentally let go of their hand and when they went to find them, they get hit on by men + fluffy ending pls I hope this wasn't too much >~

tbh i relate omg im super short and i hate crowds so much but the only exception is if im in disneyland or universal studios (fuck it im gonna write a scenario where u and a haikyuu bebe go to an amusement park) ;; otherwise i’ll end up crying :< and no no omg it wasnt too much at all!!! thank u so so much for this request

ATSUMU —

aware that ur timid and dont like crowded places so whenever he plans dates its usually in a place that doesnt have a lot of crowds and stuff so hes very much aware of that

but when the chances lands on a crowded place atsumu’s senses are just SHARP

he doesnt EVER let u out of his sight and he rarely lets go of ur hand

hes just scared of what would happen to u if ur not near him or if hes not holding u u know

then this one day,, just had to come around

u and atsumu basically got squished in the middle of the ever so busy tokyo and he accidentally let go of ur hand and the panic just

STRIKES HIM

and he didnt even hear u call for him so he doesnt have any fuckin idea of where u went so homie is swimming thru the sea of people and calling ur name and is extremely stressed

like oh my god my smol and shy and timid baby is lost where tf aRE U

he found u where u originally started and u were partially surrounded by boys who are obviously from harajuku LMAO

they were just towering over u and being very weird and atsumu fuckin sped walk to where u are and shoving people around to get to u

“JESUS i thought i fucking lost u i was panicking back there”

“hey back off we got them first”

“hey why dont u shut up and leave my partner alone?” he really has no shame knowing this bitch isnt even from tokyo

he apologizes profusely for even not holding ur hand tight enough and hes just extremely guilty :^(

OSAMU —

his calm nature kinda just reminds me that he probably doesnt like crowded places either

but he asked if u wanted to go to fuji-q with him and u said sure why not bc ya kno what would be the harm of it

osamu picked the worst date and it was partially crowded and now ur like “oh great”

the roller coasters were scaring u and theres a haunted house so that would be mf fun amirite

osamu promised that he would never let u go if yall went to the haunted house and u trust him so yall go 😐

there were a couple sets of people after u and it just so happened that this one couple screams every time somebody breathes like ??

this one jumpscare scared the shit out of them and they ran past u and osamu and ended up taking osamu with them along the way and u were left alone

it was dark and scary and u feel like u were going to die inside and osamu was panicking silently and quietly but really his mind was absolute chaos

even if its dark hes trying to find a way to find u by walking in the wrong direction of the entire house

u ended up ducking behind one of the counters in the house and u just sat there waiting for osamu while the panic just grows bigger and bigger in ur chest

eventually his eyes adjust to the dark and hes checking EVERYTHING and i mean every single corner of the whole thing and hes asking the staff for help

they did not find u but osamu heard tiny sniffles and he found u just )); head buried on ur forearm bc uve been stuck there for a while

“oh baby im so sorry-”

“osamu..” u hugged him so tightly and it broke his heart seeing u like that omg :^(

throughout the day he only ever kept u super close to him ): if he could say he developed some sort of paranoia bc of that, he would

WAKATOSHI —

he likes going outside and stuff !! especially the park he likes the park but he likes it even better when ur with him <33 ik super cheesy

so new years came along and he messaged u asking if u wanted to go to the temple with him for new blessings and good luck for the year

u kept in mind that there will be a ton of people there but it eases ur mind a little knowing wakatoshi is with u and u know he’ll just stick by u the entire day

yeah well slight inconvenience when he went to go get a little snack and this little charm thingies for u, he came back and u poofed!

he doesnt think much of it but he starts looking for u while holding the charms in his hand

when he does find u, ur expression was uncomfortable bc this dude was pushing himself onto u and he just

marches right up to him and yall know this a big bitch so he just glares at the guy tbh trash talking wakatoshi would never work

he’d apologize for not taking u with him and the second he hands u the charm thingies ur smile when u see it just warms his heart so much

he thinks ur the best lucky charm in his life <33

SAKUSA —

imma keep it real simple here

but u will never catch this bitch in a crowded place like ever

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kikiyakno · 3 years

Text

TEXTS: Kian & Jaesang

Date → Sunday July 10, 2021 ( 1 AM )

Mentioned → Jae’s crush, Kang Nova, Seong Sunwoo, Brandon Kelly

Synopsis → After a big question, the boys have late night heart-to-heart sesh between best friends.

Feat. → @yijaesang

Kian — 12:49 AM

hyung?

can I ask you a question?

you don't have to answer if it makes you sad

Jae — 12:57 AM

you can ask me anything u know that

Kian

are you sure? 👀

Jae

(unsent) I'm already sad what's the difference

duh now hit me with it

Kian

What does it feel like?

to be n love...and stuff...

momo said you were in love...

Jae

I'm in the worst kind of love

and I still wouldn't trade it

love isn't what they always told us

we're kind of led to believe we're supposed to feel like we can't live without that person

but the truth is, we can feel like we can live without them if we have to but that it's not like it would kill us, it would just...our life would feel half

think about it like this

we're surviving without woo and we're existing still sure but, there's a piece that isn't connected into place, isn't there? That's a real love

I'm probably not the best to ask since I'm in love with someone who doesn't even want to speak to me or know me. But I guess I still know a bit from how I feel

Why?

Kian

I really like someone...

but I'm afraid to call it love...since I've never felt it before

Jae

yes you have and you'd know it when you felt it, trust me

compare it in part to how you feel about woo and me. The three of us are all each other's person before anyone else

but since it's the first time you really have to look at it

it's easy to think it's something it's not or that it's deeper than it'll end up being

and you have to ask why you're afraid to say it

Kian

because I don't want to be wrong...

I wasn't wrong about you guys.

Jae

and you KNEW you weren't wrong about us right?

Kian

well you used to talk about me a lot...

but susu kept me around.

and i wanted to be your friend

Jae

I was a foreign kid trying to survive around people who didn't speak my language, i disliked anyone who spoke English

I disliked anyone regardless let's be real

but you still knew didn't you

Kian

I hoped you give me a chance.

So all those other kids would stop picking on me...

So maybe yes.

Jae

damn you just wanted my mean mug to be used to your advantage 😂

there's no way to really be sure sometimes but I think you feeling afraid that you might be wrong is something to heavily take into consideration

if you felt it truly, you wouldn't think you're wrong

Kian

WELL AT THE TIME YA. I WON'T LIE. PEOPLE DIDN'T MESS WITH YOU.

oh...okay...i see....

well what if I think it's everything I wanted!

And i'm just paranoid over nothing.

Jae

that could very well be the case

but

momo said I'M in love

Kian

yeah...

she asked about you cos she’s been worried

Jae

no I mean

if momo hasnt said you are, are you

Kian

wh...

Oohhh....

Jae

has momo asked who you're in love with?

Kian

😥 no...

she hasn’t said anything about who I’ve been going out with

i just figured she's busy

Jae

that woman knows things that happen in her SLEEP, she's never too busy

so I'm guessing you're talking about Brandon?

Kian

is it all the gossip that made you guess?

Jae

nova told me she saw you two even before GG

if anything, there's clues on GG that point to some reasons that maybe you do really need to make sure

you know I dont put much stock in GG but also going off my own experience with Brandon...

you really gotta be sure because as someone who knows you, I don't see it. I know the kind of person you are and I know how he is

Kian

he’s...

he’s not what everyone thinks.

but I know...I know what he did wasn’t cool.

Jae

if people think of you as something, you have had the capability to be that person that's the thing. People will say I'm a mean cold asshole and you'd punch them but you know i can be

I feel like you don't know the half of stuff he's done to be honest but it's not my place to tell you after you've started feeling this way because it'll look bad on me

Kian

I still appreciate the honesty...I understand.

He makes me laugh a lot...and happy!

He calls me beautiful. And intelligent. I feel like it after he says it sometimes.

And we talk about going on adventures! All around the world...he said he wants to see all his favorite places with me...so we can make new memories together.

it feels like a dream whenever he speaks to me…

Jae

let me ask you something

has he ever asked where YOU want to go or is it just HIS favorite places?

has he mentioned any of your stuff from la playa or pride? have you mentioned his?

you don't find it a bit funny that you start hanging out with him and someone starts shading taking care of someone better than their so called best friends?

you are all those things, kian. you're all those words of validation but what actions has he done?

does Momo have a brandon special?

talk is talk, but it's the actions you need to fall for. or you'll just be left with words

Kian

we had a picnic... he cooked for us and it was kind of awful, but it was the thought!

we had a sleepover one day. That was nice...

he hasn’t talked about la Playa or pride... I haven’t brought it up much either.

I’m listening to you I promise.

It’s just...making me think is all.

Jae

did you congratulate him for either of his "sets*?

Kian

no…

Jae

positive about that?

Kian

😰

Maybe…

Jae

did you forget or are you trying to lie

Kian

...

Yes👀

Jae

yes you did say stuff?

Kian

yes I did say things!

Jae

and did he say anything to you?

did you know it wasn't me who had ft brandon kelly on all the advertisement

and it wasn't me who made him take a photo backstage and never uploaded it

I had to agree to the whole thing just so he'd stop tagging me in cat things and sending his weird ass "fans" after me with edits after i kept telling him I hate it and that it pisses me off

you mentioned his "victories" and he couldn't say a word about yours? nothing at all?

we are on the RADIO kian

we shocked the entire COMMUNITY and nothing from the guy whos trying to woo you or whatever? that's a huge red flag kian. I bet he talked all about minjoons though didn't he?

Kian

he hasn’t...or Didnt.

Jae

i bet you total strangers have

Kian

talked about minjoon’s?

Jae

said something to you about yours

Kian

Oh! Well!

Does my follower influx count?

Jae

I guess. And I'm sure people around SM have mentioned it

that's not even a friend, kian. thats someone who just wants your attention on them

Kian

Maybe...maybe I’m just someone who’s giving him a chance. And it’s okay if that’s what it is.

I understand why you would think that. I do. I promise.

And I’m not mad at you, don’t worry. I’m glad that you’re so honest with me. I always want you to be.

[unsent] even if I disagree

Jae

it's not okay if your potential first time loving someone is wasted on you though

at least one person in my life isn't, what a relief

I just want you to be happy and I just want to be around to be there for you and make sure you don't get blinded by flashy offers and pretty words because you deserve more than anyone in the world ya kno?

take it from me...you don't want to be where I am right now

Kian

I’m sorry, Jaesang...

I mean that you are where you are now.

At least going to Seoul was still fun right?!

And flying in a private plane!

Jae

if it weren't for the good memories with you, I think a huge part of me would wish we hadn't gone

ended up costing me another person close to me but that's nothing new lately is it?

but you and I had fun and that matters more

Kian

Lets go out!

I hate you talking like this.

Jae

on the holy night of Sunday??? What would momo say 😱😱😱🤯

I'm down to go out though

we can do whatever you want

Kian

SHE’LL UNDERSTAND

we’re gonna go food truck hoppin 😤

Jae

I'm starving so that's perfect

want me to come pick you up or are we taking the scooter?

Kian

SCOOTER

ILL BRING YOUR HELMET

Jae

careful you'll make my heart flutter

Kian

I can drop u off at the hospital if u need that

Jae

I hope you drop your taco

Kian

I CAN JUST FLING YOU

Jae

and what do you do when I die

Kian

take ur Jean jackets 😗

Jae

would you miss me when you wear them?

Kian

do cars have tires Jaesang

#— mobile interaction.#— jae sang

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phantom-bleu · 3 years

Note

God PLEASE gush abt Timekeeper and all ur feelings abt them

ok lol *goes off* PLEASE THIS IS SO LONG im a little fucked up over timekeeper🙄 if u guys have any cool idea s. please . please talk to me

so croissant cookie tends to get bored with things over time and do more complex or daring things to stave off her boredom right. I think in timekeepers history, croissant did this by inventing more sophisticated and powerful time travel devices, eventually leading up 2 building the sonic embroider. which in principle is her finest work but in practice is way too much power 4 a regular cookie to have; the sonic embroider lets her see millions of years into the past and future, and see every branching path of the same timeline and go into an infinite number of other timelines on top of that, and the sonic embroider lets her do this in seconds. knowing literally everything that can possibly happen in the future, and seeing time on such a grand scale is too much for croissant to comprehend and still lead a normal life, so over time she goes completely off her rocker and many years down the line we get timekeeper who is deranged <3

timekeeper does not care abt gingerbrave or his friends, or most cookies because they can take a peek into a million different parallel universes where gingerbrave exists and in none of them does he have a grand impact on the timeline. I think that being able to see so many timelines that are all billions of years long massively devalues the worth of personal decisions or individual lives unless you have a huge historical impact. when u look at it the way timekeeper is forced to, the other cookies are just variables that decide if an outcome happens or not so its hard for them to empathize or show compassion because at the end of the day it literally does not matter if they do or dont. its like 1 drop of water in a sea of time yknow

i also think that bc of this timekeeper is perpetually bored and extremely lonely. nothing can surprise them bc they already saw that it was going to happen. they already know everything abt every person and have seen their life play out, so ppl dont interest them. destroying timelines and causing chaos and time paradoxes etc etc is probably one of the few ways they can entertain themselves nowadays because the very least thats something they cant predict the outcome of... and i dont think theyre just doing this to hurt others, they dont even seem 2 care abt their own life bc in the story croissant threatens to change history so tk never becomes the tbd director which would cause them to not exist.... that doesnt freak tk out at all though, in fact it excites them. so i dont think they do these horrible things to upset people, they do it for the adrenaline rush and simply dont care abt how it affects others, even if theyre the one affected

I think this is why they are so interested in croissant and having her join them bc croissant is unpredictable to them- there r plenty of times in the story where croissant takes timekeeper off guard, or moments where timekeeper says they couldnt have predicted something croissant does. And i think having someone who they cant predict, someone whos actually on equal terms as them for once is EXTREMELY exciting for timekeeper whos pretty much doomed themself to be one step ahead of everyone else.... croissant isnt one step behind them, so shes someone they can bond with almost like a normal cookie? and so they go to very extreme measures to get croissant to join them, partly bc they simply believe the ends justify the means but also because they are extremely desperate for a true companion

this is a silly one but: when croissant dropped cosmos gear into a time rift, timekeeper found it first, and time shenanigans meant they n cosmos gear spent years together and became the bestest of friends while only a few minutes passed between croissant losing the gear and going to search for it. hence why cosmos gear is both their pets at the same time, time travel means it can essentially be with both of them at the same time

this is also only tangentially related to timekeeper but hear me out. i think somewhere between making their first timecraft and the sonic embroider, timekeeper made a very compact timecraft which u can wear as a watch😏😏😏 but they were a little clumsy and dropped it in a rift somewhere and 1 thing after another happens and eventually the blue cheese family got their hands on it..... and none of them kno anything abt “tbd protocol” or like, anything abt the ethics of time travel, And theyre also huge assholes so basically they go around fucking with the timeline in ways that they definitely shouldnt which does Very Very Bad Damage 2 their history resulting in 1. the family completely collapsing and 2. roguefort and walnut getting trapped in a time loop in the future that they cant get out of bc no one has the power 2 go and undo the damage on the timeline :| thankfully timekeeper Does have that power etc etc etc 12345678910 abcdefghijklmnopqrs timekeeper/roguefort real *drops mic*

#posting this xx #its been in my drafts 4 a while cuz i needed to gush SO bad but i wanted to keep it 4 a while jic i had more to add #but im feeling impulsive. talk to me Talk to me abt tk Talk with me communicate with me

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chibistarlyte · 4 years

Text

one day

He's okay, Katsuki has to remind himself again, almost afraid that Todoroki might slip right through his calloused fingers if he doesn't hold on tight enough.

ayyy here’s a follow-up to my previous todobaku fic some days, this time from bakugou’s pov as he deals with the aftermath of todoroki’s depressive episode.

thank you to kat @sunshineijirou for the beta, as always! <3 ilysm!

fic can be read below the cut or here on ao3! you can also find a masterlist of all my bnha fics here!

If someone had told Katsuki, when he woke up this morning, that by this afternoon he’d be spooning with his secret crush after said secret crush jumped down to his balcony in some kind of depressive fit…

Suffice to say that Katsuki would have never believed it, even if his life depended on it.

Yet here he is, arms wrapped around Todoroki Shouto’s waist and his face buried in the back of his neck as the other boy sleeps peacefully in his bed. Or, Katsuki assumes peacefully, judging by the light snores and soft, lax features of Todoroki’s face.

Well, Katsuki thinks as he breathes a warm sigh against the other boy’s still frigid skin, at least Todoroki is safe now. It would be an outright lie to say that Katsuki hasn’t been worried about Todoroki all goddamn day, ever since he saw the other boy sitting precariously on the edge of his balcony and uttering uncharacteristic existential thoughts earlier that morning.

Just a little bit ago, when Todoroki had jumped...Katsuki’s heart had all but stopped in his chest.

Unconsciously, Katsuki tightens his grip around Todoroki and digs his nose deeper into the soft skin at the nape of Todoroki’s neck, breathing in his scent. He’s okay. He’s okay.

Katsuki jolts as he hears a loud buzzing noise, his palms sweaty and sparking in his alarm. He quickly retracts his arms from around Todoroki, afraid of burning the other boy with his Quirk. Katsuki belatedly realizes the sound is his phone vibrating on top of the headboard. Wiping his sweaty hands on his shirt as he sits up, he reaches for his phone and unlocks it with a click. A notification bubble at the bottom of the screen tells him the class 1-A group chat is active with messages right now.

Midoriya: hey guys has anyone seen todoroki-kun since class was over? he left before i could catch up with him and he hasn’t answered any of my texts and when i went to his room to check on him he didn’t answer… Uraraka: i haven’t seen him since our rescue exercise, deku-kun. are you sure he came back to the dorms? Midoriya: i mean i’m not positive but where else would he go? Iida: Todoroki-kun has been acting strangely all day...perhaps he heeded our advice and sought out Recovery Girl? Kaminari: nah bruh, i was at rg’s office after class for my broken wrist, i didn’t see him there Tokoyami: I can have Dark Shadow scope out the area and look for Todoroki, if needed. Yaoyorozu: I am worried about Todoroki-san. He wasn’t acting like himself today, and I fear to think what would happen if he’s alone right now. Jirou: which room is his???? i can listen in and see if hes there Kirishima: he’s on the fifth floor, right above bakugou’s room

Katsuki sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. Great, now Todoroki has the entire class worried after him. They’d send out a goddamn search party if Katsuki doesn’t say something.

So he starts typing.

Bakugou: relax u damn extras, icyhot’s with me

There’s a short pause in the chat as several people begin typing and soon enough the messages flood right in.

Midoriya: what???? todoroki-kun is with you, kacchan?! Jirou: shit, dude, he must be fucked in the head to go hang out with explody Kirishima: is he ok?? are u guys in ur room bakubro? Mina: DID U KIDNAP THE POOR LAD, BAKUGOU?!? Uraraka: can we come see him?

Katsuki lets out a frustrated sigh and thumbs back a response.

Bakugou: if any of you assholes even think about coming and pounding on my door, i’ll break ur fuckin fingers. halfie’s asleep so you chucklefucks need to keep quiet

As if to make sure the group chat hadn’t somehow awoken Todoroki from his slumber, Katsuki looks away from his phone to the sleeping boy next to him. Not much has changed in the last few minutes, save for a slight twitching of Todoroki’s nostril and the fingers of his right hand slightly curling and unfurling.

When his phone pings with another message, Katsuki sees that it’s from Kirishima. He opens their text messages.

Kirishima: hey bakubro is everything ok?? i mean not just with todoroki but with u too? Bakugou: i’m fine, shitty hair. not sure about him, tho Bakugou: he was pretty messed up when i brought him in Kirishima: what happened? Bakugou: the crazy fucker jumped from his balcony down to mine like an idiot, coulda hurt himself Kirishima: … Kirishima: ...was he trying to Kirishima: u kno…

Katsuki doesn’t want to think about the reasons behind Todoroki’s actions, behind the other boy’s strange and despondent behavior all day. He knows Todoroki’s got family issues, with what he’d overheard at the sports festival in their first year. Then, after having dinner at the Todoroki household and interning with Endeavor all those months ago, Katsuki has been able to put the pieces together well enough.

He scoots down the bed until he’s lying down again, his arm against Todoroki’s back as he holds his phone up to text with Kirishima.

Bakugou: idk, he hasn’t told me anything, just basically been a zombie the whole fuckin time. he was so cold and he wasn’t usin his quirk to warm up, bastard’s lucky he didn’t get hypothermia or some shit Kirishima: do u need anything? Bakugou: i told u, i’m fine Kirishima: ok...but srsly, i’m here for u if u need to talk...or if i can bring you anything, yeah? Bakugou: yeah, yeah, i get it hair for brains Bakugou: ...thanks Kirishima: i gotchu bro

Katsuki sets his phone on silent before locking it and placing it up on his headboard again. He rolls onto his side, chest against Todoroki’s back once again, and reaches around to touch the back of his hand to the other boy’s forehead. It still feels colder than it probably should, but warmer than before, which Katsuki counts as progress.

He settles his arms around Todoroki’s waist again and scoots closer until they’re flush against each other. Katsuki tangles his legs with Todoroki’s to help warm them up—Todoroki’s bare ankles feel cold against Katsuki’s own heated skin.

He's okay, Katsuki has to remind himself again, almost afraid that Todoroki might slip right through his calloused fingers if he doesn't hold on tight enough.

"You really fuckin' scared me there for sec, half-n-half," Katsuki murmurs against the back of Todoroki’s neck, feeling the moisture of his own breath bouncing back at him from their close proximity. "The hell did you think you were doing?" he asks the air, knowing full well that Todoroki is dead asleep and can't hear a word Katsuki is saying.

And thank fuck for that, because Katsuki can't seem to shut himself up and continues speaking.

"Don't you realize how many people care about your stupid ass? How important you are to everyone? Fucking Deku, Round Face, Four-Eyes, Yaomomo...me…"

Katsuki clenches his jaw to stop his mouth from betraying him any further. He has no idea what's compelling him to such honesty. Perhaps it's because he knows Todoroki can't hear him, knows that he won't have to suffer any unfortunate consequences of having his feelings laid bare in front of him.

Just...seeing Todoroki fly through the air, even if it was only for a few seconds...Katsuki could have forever lost the chance to say all the things he wishes he were brave enough to admit.

He sighs through his nose, his teeth gritting painfully against each other as he tightens his jaw even more. Fucking coward, he chastises himself.

"Bakugou?"

Katsuki's heart stills in his chest as Todoroki’s confused, sleep-laden voice drifts into his senses. Todoroki stiffens in his grip, muscles tense and taut, almost as if he's afraid of something. Unconsciously, Katsuki's arms tighten around the other boy’s waist and he finds his hands pressing almost protectively against Todoroki’s abdomen.

"I'm here," he answers belatedly, nuzzling his nose against Todoroki’s skin—still too cold for his liking, but ever so slowly getting warmer.

Todoroki exhales, going boneless in Katsuki's arms. There's a minute shift of his head as he digs his cheek into the pillow. "I...didn't dream it, then…" he says a bit absently, sounding so, so tired.

"Dream what?" Katsuki asks softly, his fingers tracing odd shapes on Todoroki’s skin.

"That I was here...with you," Todoroki clarifies, letting out another exhale that made him deflate like a balloon with too many leaks.

Katsuki is unable to keep from snorting. "Couldn't very well let you leave after you just—" He stops himself from finishing that thought, because the idea that Todoroki really might have been trying to off himself was too much for Katsuki to handle. "Look, you could barely walk and were hardly coherent enough to make it back to your room. I couldn't let you leave and end up hurting yourself or some shit."

Todoroki lets out a breath that sounds suspiciously like a laugh.

"Don't you fucking laugh at me, you bastard," Katsuki says without any real threat. "Sorry for fucking caring about your stupid ass."

It's then that Todoroki starts to pull away, curling in on himself. He untangles his legs from Katsuki's and worms his way out of Katsuki's arms until he’s at the edge of the bed, the two of them no longer touching.

Katsuki's heart sinks into his stomach. Damn it, there goes his stupid mouth ruining everything again.

"You shouldn't care about me," Todoroki says, sounding miles away.

"Why the fuck not?" Katsuki bites back, not liking where this conversation has turned.

"I'm not worth it," Todoroki repeats his words from earlier, and they still feel like a knife stabbing right through Katsuki's chest.

He doesn't understand why someone like Todoroki could ever think he's worthless.

It makes him...angry.

"What the fuck is it gonna take for you to realize that you are worth it?" Katsuki says in a harsh whisper, trying to reign in his rage. He knows if he explodes now, he might chase Todoroki off and cause him to do...something…

Todoroki doesn't answer.

Against his better judgment, Katsuki reaches for Todoroki’s back. His fingers barely graze the black t-shirt he's wearing before he notices a significant drop in temperature. Frost begins crawling up the shell of Todoroki’s ear.

"No, no, stop that," Katsuki says as he frantically scoots closer. He envelops Todoroki in his arms once again, willing his own body heat into the other boy to cancel out the freezing power of his Quirk.

To Katsuki's surprise, Todoroki shifts and rolls over so that they're face to face. Tears snake sideways down Todoroki’s face and melt into the pillowcase. Katsuki feels incredibly guilty for still finding Todoroki so beautiful.

Katsuki's hands find the small of Todoroki’s back, his fingers tangling in the cotton of his t-shirt.

"I'm sorry," Todoroki chokes out, squirming and wiggling until his face is hidden against Katsuki’s chest.

"Nothin' to be sorry for, icyhot. We all got shit to deal with," Katsuki mutters into Todoroki’s hair, wanting to lay a kiss along the part of red and white. But he refrains.

Todoroki just nods. Katsuki can feel his tears soak into his shirt.

They stay like that for what could have been moments or hours, for all Katsuki knows. When he hears Todoroki’s breathing even out again, and notices a faint warmth pulsating through the air, Katsuki sighs in relief.

It's amazing how one day can change so many things, he muses. Katsuki's world has been tilted off its axis in the span of mere hours, making him reevaluate almost everything he's come to learn about himself, about Todoroki. He knows, without a doubt, that he cares for the idiot in his arms. His moment of clarity had come the second Todoroki had let go of the railing.

Katsuki swears to himself that he'll make Todoroki realize how much he matters to everyone. And, maybe one day, how much he matters to Katsuki.

#todobaku #todobaku fic #tdbk #tdbk fic #bakutodo #bakutodo fic #bnha #bnha fic #my writing

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shithive · 4 years

Text

> Welcome to the shitshow.

You wake up poorly. Your head is still swimming from whatever tranquilizer that assassin had you knocked out with. There are stripes up your arms and legs where tthey’d tied you up, rubbed raw and bloody from your attempts to get free.

At least you’re untied now. That’s something. Groaning, you pull yourself up to your feet. The surface underneath you is cold metal, and the steel spikes on your bootsoles make scuffing noises against it.

You aren’t tied up anymore, but now you’re in a cage. It isn’t even a prison, or a dungeon. It’s a cage placed in the middle of a fancy jerkoff clown ballroom, the whole room in purple with pink and lime designs swirling in spraypaint across the walls. It’s hard for you to see everything from between the cage bars — and even if you could, your attention is immediately drawn to the chair you’re placed directly in front of.

It’s an ostentatious golden throne, and a local popstar is sitting comfortably in it as he taps away on his phone. You draw out an exaggerated groan.

DARAYA: ▲▲uggghhh▼▼ MARVUS: lol u up ? DARAYA: ▲▲of course its you▼▼ DARAYA: ▲this is the only way you can get anyone to come near you, huh▼

You don’t bother listening for his response. You aren’t hanging around in this cage just because some clown thought it would be a funny joke to put you in one. You open up your sylladex, thinking you’ll melt the bars or throw a bomb Marvus’s way, or even just set the whole room on fire with the two of you in it, but your sylladex is empty.

Of course he took all your shit.

MARVUS: i bet u got sum questions huh

You’re more of a “burn first, ask questions later” kind of girl. Your only response is to yell and throw yourself at the walls of the cage around you. When it remains intact after several attempts, you pull off one of your spiked bracelets and hurl it at Marvus through the bars. It hits him square in the chest, but doesn’t seem to do any real damage.

MARVUS: OW MARVUS: damn a man tries 2 let u keep ur outfit in tact and dis be the thanx i get

He just gets a glare for that, but you resist the urge to throw any other accessories at him. You don’t have much to your name as it is.

You return to kicking at the bars of your cage as he keeps talking. Even though you want to ignore him, you find it hard not to listen.

MARVUS: u kno why youre here sis. u been real bad. you dun ruined my clothes, got some good people hella killed, and u wrecked my ride. but thats not evn the worst thing u did MARVUS: u snatched a motherfxxkers good ass memoriez. dat limo was sentimental MARVUS: it aint the money i want in payment. i want new memories :o)

His goddamn shitty clown smile. Fuck this guy.

DARAYA: ▲▲▲fuck you▼▼▼ DARAYA: ▲▲no one cares what you WANT▼▼ DARAYA: ▲i don’t give a shit about anything you’ve ever done▼ DARAYA: ▲▲INCLUDING putting me in this fucking box!▼▼ DARAYA: ▲▲not sorry about your ride, not sorry about your clothes, DEFINITELY not sorry about your “““good ass memories”””▼▼ DARAYA: ▲▲▲GET FUCKED▼▼▼

Marvus doesn’t seem particularly fazed. If anything, you’re pretty sure he’s just laughing at you now, but you don’t care. All these clowns know is laugh their stupid bulges off, eat hot chip and lie. You keep talking. Now you’re puncuating your words by throwing your body recklessly against the bars of your cage. Part of you is already exhausted, but mostly you’re just pissed.

DARAYA: ▲you think that’s funny? because i can get▼ DARAYA: ▲▲▲hilarious▼▼▼ DARAYA: ▲▲just let me out▼▼ DARAYA: ▲▲of the STUPID box!▼▼ DARAYA: ▼AUGH▲ DARAYA: ▼▼fuck OFF▲▲ MARVUS: ...

He’s doing the thing. You’d seen the effects of weird clown powers at Marvus’s show the other night, with how entranced and riled up his fans became the second he came onstage. You hadn’t felt particularly moved. But now you feel a wave of what you can only describe as “vibes” run through you, clearly intended to make you dial it the fuck down.

And yeah, you do feel an urge to chill out. Like, everything’s cool now, maybe Marvus has drugs? Maybe he has some Faygo you can drink. Even though you’re in a cage… yeah, no, you aren’t listening to this.

DARAYA: ▲i repeat▼ DARAYA: ▲▲get fucked▼▼

You’ve spent your entire life ignoring your own better instincts, why would you start listening to Marvus Xoloto’s? It’s like when of the older jades in the caverns tells you to “calm down”. It just makes you even angrier.

You keep on yelling and spitting and kicking at your cage, giving yourself bruises to jolt your sponge and distract it from obeying the urge to chill. Though you do gradually start to wind down, you assure yourself it’s just because you’re tired. And you are! Physically, you’re exhausted and wounded all over. But it totally has nothing to do with whatever good vibes this shitclown is trying to make you feel.

Maybe once he realizes he can’t get to you with his shitty spongerot brainworms, he’ll get bored and let you go. Or maybe he’ll keep you here forever. You weren’t lying when you said you don’t give a shit. It’s not like there’s even anything for you out there.

#Action.#carousalll‌#mind control --

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fearsbellsarchived · 4 years

Text

[me? Thinking about a gf fairytales au instead of being productive? More likely than u think!!! think ou.at buT BETTER and w/o the real world dimension hopping part. under the cut bc i just copy/pasted my tags from forever ago to put them in one place

mabel and dipper are hansel and gretal

paz is sleeping beauty

bill is maleficient

if we’re gonna get disney about it wendy as merida

i LOVE the idea of tambry as rapunzel???

mabel can also be like...eric from the little mermaid

so mermando can be ariel

gIDEON AS URSULA/VANESSA IN THAT VEIN THO

bill is also rumplestilskin

stan can be the huntsman (idk from which story cause theres a fEW BUT)

ford is the sorcerer from fanstasia

ford is teaching dipper magic....and instead of a true love’s kiss that’s how he wakes paz (maybe?)

the northwests made a deal w bill like in the most famous version of rumplestilskin but instead of wanting paz for himself he just wanted to steal her body at 16

so when they lose the deal they ask for help from ford and ford’s like “yo i can maybe change the deal??? a little bit???” so instead of bill taking her over when he goes to she falls asleep

so dipper wasnt supposed to wake her up but he found her and fords notes and he and mabel went on an adventure

bill is all the villains

billains

so stan has to leave mabel and dipper in the woods (idk y it wasnt for long the twins are just impatient) so stan disappears and the twins are like “lETS EXPLORE THE WOODS”

they come across some creepy old house w a lot of spiderwebs (can u guess the villain yet?)

an older woman comes out and is like “why are you guys lost in the forest?”

mabel points to the glitter trail “we’re not lost”

dipper looks behind them ‘mabel!!! where’s all the glitter?!”

(ACTUALLY MAYBE ITS YARN???)

so they lose the trail

meanwhile stan is losing his fucking mind

he follows the stray glitter but it’s blown all over

he feels “LOST IN THE WOOOOODDDS!!!”

so the old lady offers for them to stay the night bc its getting late

dipper is SUPER sus but he plays it cool surprisingly

mabel is So In!

long short...stan eventually saves them from darlene’s trap

usually shes just a maneater but look

when u live in the woods u do what u can

so stan hauls them back to their cottage

dipper knew there was weird shit out there but he wants MORE

he starts going through his great-uncle’s journals (*cue the dipper squee*)

he reads about bill and his deal w paz’s parents

he’s like....’maybe we should rescue her?’

ford wont tell him why they cant

so dipper and mabel sneak out

they steal the grunkles’ boat

mabel falls over board???

dipper tries like HELL to save her

but then he sees mermando save her

SO MABEL IS SAVED BY MERMANDO!!!

gideon (who had long-loved mabel from afar) finds out

he visits the merman to trick him

all mabel remembers is his voice

so YES mermando trades his voice for legs just like the movie

sue me okay w his distinct accent it makes sense!!!

so the twins get sidetracked bc mermando shows up out of nowhere

they dock on a small island for a pit stop and thats when ‘kiss the girl’ happens

they dont kiss so they move on

they dock on another stretch of land the next day

AND GIDEON APPEARS

the twins have only heard about him from their grunkles so mabel hears his voice and goes *heart eyes*

mermando is Distressed

dipper is Focused on getting to this sleeping princess

mabel makes fun of him for liking her

SO GIDEON HAS MERMANDOS VOICE!

at one point dipper catches him w/o the amulet that makes him sound like mermando

and he tells mabel and its kinda like “the hand that rocks the mabel” or whatever the ep was called

it takes dipper and mermando being threatened (and gideons voice slipping) for her to catch on and she breaks up w him

dipper wants to throw him overboard

they just leave him on the next inhabited island they find

mermando got his kiss but decides to go back to the ocean anyway

he promises to write

mabel is Sad

SO BACK TO OUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED ADVENTURE!

the twins come across a land near the one paz is on and decide to stop for food and to stretch their legs and other hygiene things

they find out there’s some archery thing going on and mabel is like ’ooooh can we try?!’

turns out its for neighboring kingdoms’ princes to win a princess

mabel and dipper think this is RIDICULOUS so they crash it

mabel steps up to shoot and everyone’s like ‘wHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?’

then dipper steps up beside her. neither of them have shot a bow before

they shoot at the same time. mabel’s like thisclose to the bullseye. dippers too far right

THEN!!! PRINCESS WENDY COMES OUT OF NOWHERE

DIPPER AND MABEL ARE IN AWE OF THIS VALKYRIE. THEYRE BOTH READY FOR HER TO KILL THEM BC THEY THINK ITLL BE AWESOME

but wendy is like ‘ACTUALLY ILL SHOOT FOR MYSELF THANKS’ and splits like three arrows down the middle w her accuracy

she looks at mabel and dipper and is like ‘u dudes look fun! ive never seen u before who are u???’

and they’re like ‘WELL!’ and launch into detail about their adventure w overlapping voices and sound affects and VAST description

anyways. i cant decide how old people are rn okay

so wendy is like “hey dad??? im going on an adventure w these guys!” and her dad is like “unusual but u DID just win ur own hand. so ill allow it”

“YES! can i take soos too?!”

“sure!”

sO THEYRE OFF AGAIN!!! lemme tell u the ship is filling faST!!!

they get to paz’s land. and the first thing they find is a girl in a tower with long purple hair.

everyone is pretty much just making ‘wtf’ faces for like....ten minutes.

finally wendy calls up the tower like “YO! WHATS W ALL THE HAIR?!”

tambry leans out the window w a bored expression and goes “its mine. im tambry. who r u?”

they introduce themselves and are like “u wanna come on our adventure?”

then....ROBBIE APPEARS!

and he knows where the princess is!!!

”oh yeah. her. shes also in a tower. its got a door but its guarded by gnomes.”

then robbie climbs tambrys hair pecks her cheek and ducks in the tower

they decide to head for the tower robbie directed them to. but they have to pass the castle. Northwest Castle

robbie warned them about the northwests. said that the princess was one and before she disappeared she was the snottiest brat hed ever met

so they became friends despite the fact that he plays music for a living (and not very well either)

her parents told her of the spell when she was twelve

so robbie’s like “they are not nice people and neither was she??? most of the townsfolk are glad shes asleep tbh”

but dammit! dipper came here for an adventure!!! he wasnt going to stop just bc the princess wasnt what he expected!

so they continue on!

mabel is like “maybe she doesnt KNOW how to be nice!”

and soos is just excited to be there!

and wendy is just...u kno...chill

they start to get close to the castle and they feel like they’re being watched

and then soos notices the PEACOCKS!

they assume theyre spies for the king and queen. which is half true?

they can also warn bill if someone is near pacifica

oh damn imagine that

being stuck asleep w a DREAM DEMON in ur head

sorry for the accidental psychological torture paz

WHICH IS THE ONLY TORTURE SHES HAD!

i think to make up for risking her life as a baby ther parents were like “we’re just gonna spoil u rotten and PRETEND u do no wrong eVERYTHING IS FINE”

so dipper is reading the journal and he FINALLY gets to the true loves kiss part of the deal

and he looks around at the party like “oh shit true love what do we do???”

mabel suggests he at least try and everyone agrees that yeah okay thats the back up plan

but dipper wants to use a SPELL!!!

so the king and queen see him w the journal and remember ford having the same one

so everyone is brought to the king and queen

theyre like “pRINCESS GWENDOLYN?!”

bc this is MY STORY and if i wanna give wendy a more princess-y name thEN I WILL

i say as i continue to refer to mason as DIPPER!!!

SO THEYRE MEETING THE NORTHWESTS!!!

wendys like “yes that is me the princess” and then everyone else introduces themselves...w dipper introducing himself as mason bc it just sounds more fairytale-y

soos is jesus (hey zeus! not jee sus)

soos is like....wendys bff/personal servant but mostly bff

so they explain their adventure to the northwests as quickly as possible

preston is no patient man and he’s is like “tbh its probably important she be here for her 18th bday soooo??? as long as she wakes up by next year why not???”

but only bc dipper was like “i wANNA USE MAGIC I DONT WANNA KISS HER THATS PLAN B!!!”

plus u kno...even if he DOES whats the guarantee itll work???

the guarantee is me being a filthy shipper tHATS WHAT!!!

so they continue to the tower!

there is probably a sidequest thingy with giffany bc i liked that episode

also soos needs more screentime im sorry

SO THEN!!! FINALLY!!!! THEY MAKE IT TO THE TOWER!!!

WHICH IS!!!

IN FACT!!!

GUARDED

GNOMES!]

also theres a manotaur/multi-bear sidequest i just thought of bc i like THAT episode!!!

is this gf, a fairytale, sk.yrim, or a d.n.d campaign now??? WHO KNOWS!!! ITS NOT ME!!!

SO THEY GOTTA GET PAST THE GNOMES!

first they offer safe passage in exchange for mabel as their queen

after thats declined theyre like “or the redhead. well take her!”

this is also declined

finally jeff tells them to attack

at first the party tries to fight them off and they do okay

uNTIL SOME GNOME WEAPONIZED SCHMEBULOCKS RAINBOW PUKE!!! (i think it’s toxic tbh but i dONT REMEMBER)

finally mabel just pulls out her trusty crosSbow (aka “GRAPPLING HOOK!”) and they just make a tightrope to the window above the door

wendy goes first and NAILS it

then everyone else follows

soos almost falls and gets left to the gnomes but everyone helps him balance and they all make it through the window

coincidentally. the window leads to the princess’s room

OH MAN WHY DIDNT I USE THE PTERODACTYL?!

oh well. anyways.

everyone is looking around the room and like...taking it all in

dipper takes a moment...then walks over to the princess

he isnt sure if waking her will also wake the demon

crossover even more w my old paciphera au??? idk probably not

so dipper tries the spells he narrowed it down to

none of them work

all his friends have returned to the princess’s room and mabel is like “u gotta kiss her brobro!”

so dipper...poor poor dipper...just leans forward and kisses her

paz pretty much snaps her eyes open when dipper is a half inch from her face while he’s pulling back

and even tho she was forewarned she wasnt expecting DIPPER so she SCREAMS

dippers ears are ringing

she shuts her eyes and stills her breathing and sits up.

AND SEES EVERYONE ELSE AND SCREAMS AGAIN

“i dIDNT EXPECT U TO BRING *FRIENDS*!”

so once shes a little more calm they explain the whole adventure to her

paz feels a little honored they came all this way just for her

also since True Love beats everything bill is like.....back in his home dimension. also paz has been fighting him for like....over a year.

so paz is like....ready to Go. u kno. just wants to go HOME.

they get pazs shit together and exit the tower through the door

she says goodbye to the gnomes. all by name.

“oh yeah mom and dad made them my personal guard when i was like...eight. theyve been prepping for this my whole life. they’ll meet me back at the castle.” so then she starts telling them about herself and her last like

two years of being asleep w a DREAM DEMON

“sometimes i got the weirdest nightmares??? and they never ended. but when i woke up i couldnt remember anything specific.”

she and dipper talk away from the group. he tells her about how hes her true love and everything “okay well. we’ll have to lie to my parents and say it was a spell. bc they will NOT approve of us being true loves and if they hurt you...”

“then they hurt *you* too!” dipper finishes (idk maybe a combo w a soulmate au thing?)

meanwhile mabel is like...whining about boy problems??? and wendy is like “this is y boys r dumb.”

soos is like...wandering off. I WANNA INCORPORATE MELODY BUT WHO SHOULD SHE BE?!

paz and dipper start like....arguing about how to deal w her parents

apparently they actually ARENT that nice. if she doesnt marry a prince they’ll give her over to bill completely...or something idk

SO theyre nearing the castle!!!

theyve written theyre grunkles okay no worries. also mermando.

thats y mabels complaing about boys.

mermando and that manatee wife of his!!!

paz is not exactly ready to face her parents so she convinces the party (roll for charisma) to go the long way

which is actually just circles

anyways

we run back in to melody and soos and the party is like ‘wHOOPS WE DIDNT EVEN NOTICE GLAD U DIDNT GET EATEN BY A SPIDER LADY!

maybe melody is like....a fairy???

something light and ‘childish’ bc thatd fit her personality

soos is like “ive BEEN here. u dudes have been going in circles.” and everyone glares at paz.

“im sorry!!! i just dont want to go back!!!”

“ur dad made us promise to have u back for ur 18th bday.” says dipper while he tries to stay mad at his future wife

paz is like “YEAH SO HE CAN MARRY ME OFF TO A PRINCE!!!”

idk why paz and dips are being better at being soulmates here okay i was like....sleep-drunk when i first wrote this

so the party has a choice to make.

take paz back home where she wont be able to be w her TL (which in some cases has probably led to death) OR!!!

sneak her out and take her home w them?!

wendys probably gotta go back to her own kingdom tho.

and soos wants to stay w melody

U KNOW WHAT I JUST REALIZED?!

sTAN NEVER GOT TO BE SOOS’S DAD!!!!

SORRY SOOS!!!

so anyways

mabel and dipper decide to help her sneak out

luckily she knows all the blindspots

it takes longer but they finally make it back to their ship

they say theyre goodbyes to soos and melody and paz wishes them well in her kingdom. she promises to return when shes ready to rule

they load the ship and sail to wendys kingdom next

they stay a few days to recuperate

paz has trouble sleeping bc when she does the nightmares come back.

cue a kat.niss/pee.ta thing where paz sleeps next to dips bc it keeps the nightmares away

wendy has to explain why soos isnt w them to her dad who kinda shrugs it off?

“u proved u can protect urself.” or something.

after like.....a whole fucking year the twins are heading home.

paz and dipper sleep together on the ship too bc its just fucking easier

paz is nervous to meet the grunks

she and dipper arent exactly....dating??? its def more like soulmate au

where theyre AWARE theyre supposed to be together but they dont even rly know if they WANT to be together.

paz is p much “i dont rly wanna be w anyone else. ill let u kno if that changes.” and dips is like “tbh same.”

mabel is already planning a big royal wedding.

iDK Y BUT I WANT THEM TO FIND OUT THEYVE BEEN ROYALTY ALL THIS TIME??? probably just bc i LOVE that trope!!! but theyre not so its whateves.

so they FINALLY get home. mabel has been writing letters this whole time. to mermanso. to soos and melody. to wendy.

shes the captain of the dip.ifica ship and shes gotta keep her crewmembers in the know!!!

the twins also wrote to the grunks the whole time so!!!! no worries!!!

paz tries writing to her parents...but she can never find the right words.

meeting the grunks isnt as bad as she thought???

stan loves her off the bat. partially bc shes rich and bc she doesnt take shit

ford is pleased to meet the girl he saved and shes v v thankful to him for saving her life as best he could.

it takes her like a YEAR to write the letter.

she promises her parents she’ll return. AFTER shes married.

at this point she and dipper ARE together. they figured all theyre confusion out and are just living the good life!

mabel and wendy are doing the long distance thing. shes still friends w mermando.

robbie and tambry found paz and they write back and forth.

u CAN TAKE ROBBIE AND PAZ SIBLINGS FROM MY DECOMPOSING HANDS!!!

everything is as happily ever after as it can get.

and then dipper proposes despite knowing what it means.

BUT THATS A WHOLE OTHER ADVENTURE!!!!

*end credits roll. an epic theme song starts playing*

#💎 OUT OF DIAMONDS. ╱ out.#[i did this forever ago anD I FINALLY MOVED IT TO AN ACTUAL POST OF IT'S OWN]#[im planning on writing this tbh but if u got some rp ideas hum <<]

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catburgled-a · 4 years

Text

* romance headcanons.

name: augustine valentine.

nickname: auggie , gus.

gender: cisfemale - she / her pronouns usually but isn’t actually fussed either way.

romantic orientation: demiromantic.

preferred pet names: babyyyyyy

relationship status: single.

opinion on true love: i can’t say that she believes in true love in the sense that there’s only one perfect person out there for you who you’re ‘ meant ’ to be with forever , but she does believe in the all-consuming , life altering kind of love because she’s had that before & it scares the crap out of her. this is why she is so good at ignoring her feelings at all costs because she’s scared of feeling trapped & scared of giving so much of herself to another person cause fuck vulnerability.

opinion on love at first sight: nope. doesn’t exist. she believes you can 100% be drawn to someone immediately but it’s more likely sexual chemistry than any actual love. she has never once just looked at a person for the first time & thought ‘ wow i’m going to give them every part of me ’. like no , that’s stupid. it’s naive. it’s not real. she thinks that’s how people get into toxic situations because they never stop to actually get to know the person & just force it to work anyway. & for auggie in particular she has to know parts of you before she can develop any sort of romantic feelings.

how ‘romantic’ are they?: depends on what the other thinks is romantic. she might not be the petals everywhere , bouquet buying , grand gesture type of lover but she is the physically affectionate , hold your hand in public , kiss you in the rain , kiss you to shut you up kind. she’s a very passionate person in all aspects of her life & she certainly acts on that especially in love. not to mention that once you’ve got her , she’s so devoted. like she can be an asshole but at the end of the day she would kill for the one she loves.

ideal physical traits: ???????? honestly she doesn’t really have a set physical type her brain just looks at people & is like yep , that one. she has a huge range of variety in her past but i guess if anything , she leans a bit toward femininity , but at the same time she also loves scars & tattoos lol & like everyone else in the world she likes ‘em tall.

ideal personality traits: at the end of the day , in her mind , what she wants is somebody she can actually get along with so that would be someone lighthearted , fun , open-minded , someone who’s gonna cause a little trouble with her & match her passion.

unattractive physical traits: when dudes are too muscly it’s like she’s not trying to fuck the hulk , thanks.

unattractive personality traits: controlling , clingy , overbearing , overly serious , boring , anyone who is flat & uninspired.

ideal date: girl does not go on dates but side note take her to an all you can eat or a theme park or the literally just to a bar to get drunk together & fuck in the bathroom stall 🤷

do they have a type?: sexually she’s generally drawn to people with similar personalities to herself , which is actually terrible because of her many , many flaws so it can be a toxic combination at times. the one time she did take the dive & date someone with a similar personality , yeah it was messy af. two wrongs don’t make a right you might say. but i think she subconsciously finds herself more romantically drawn to the softer type. which is actually more of what she needs. someone who’s capable of being a little softer which then allows her to be. someone who can hold her accountable for her unhealthy behaviour patterns. someone who will support her where & when she needs it & not restrict her from the shady things she does , u kno ?

average relationship length: oof it depends. she's definitely not someone who goes out of her way to date , actually more accurately she avoids it entirely. one night stands are more her gig or the occasional no strings attached scenario. however the proper relationships she has actually had ranged between a few months to a couple years maximum.

preferred non-sexual intimacy: loves having her hair played with and vice versa. napping together. playing with each others hands.

commitment level: NOT GREAT LBR. it’s very hard to get her to commit but once you got her pal , you really got her.

opinion of public affection: literally lives for it. i wouldn’t say to the degree of full on making out in a crowd of people but she’s gonna smack ur ass , she’s gonna do things to rile you up , sorry can’t stop her.

past relationships?: she’s had three. two of which were in high school.

first was a girl who was her best friend when she was roughly 15 which i have also touched on a little bit here. she literally never talks about it , especially after she moved schools & graduated high school. once she went back home to visit she found out that girl’s boyfriend ended up murdering her & auggie to this day still feels responsible.

then there was a boy at her boarding school. at 16 she first met him at a party when they later slept together. it evolved into a friends with benefits type of situation. he played guitar & wanted to be a musician. he was beautiful & soft , with lots of feelings & with that came mental issues. auggie took care of him as best she could & supported him unconditionally. he was a good person & he was so much better than she ever deserved , like her definition of perfect which says a lot. she loved him so much & he fought soooo hard to force that out of her. like they went through so much to finally get to the point where auggie was like ok i’ll be ur girl & that lasted until graduation when auggie had to go on the run with her dad. which was really hard because she’ll love that boy forever.

third one was when she was 19ish & settled in las vegas , post-high school , pre-university. this was when she was rolling with a group of professional thieves. the guy that she was partnered up with she also ended up living with just straight off the bat due to circumstance. as her literal partner in crime they worked really well together professionally , but living together while being equally attracted to one another was their first mistake. they were very , very similar in their personalities. temper , assholery & all. auggie cared about him for sure but just not in the way he cared for her. she never really completely loved him & she could act out & be a massive asshole at times because of it. that’s not to say he wasn’t just as big of an asshole , he just had more feeling behind it. it’s not something she’s proud of & she still does love him in a sense , just not in an actual romantic way. they would have been better off as friends.

moral of the story , auggie’s never stopped caring about anyone she’s ever been in a relationship with.

tagged by: stole it >:^) tagging: steal it >:^)

#▸ 𝚒. ` ♔ HEADCANON.#long post /#domestic violence mention /#literally have had this template sitting in my drafts for weeks and finally got around to doing it

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shushvera · 5 years

Text

*toy story shark vc* howdy howdy howdy ! i would like to make it known i’ve been unabashedly eyeing this since it opened ! anyway ! i’ve lost my ooc intro groove so we gonna move down to my ic intro down below:

oh hi there, welcome to holiday, VERA FLOROS. you’ve been here for TWO MONTHS? awesome! you look just like MARINA DIAMANDIS, it’s crazy. oh, so you’re a 30 year old ‘FORTUNE TELLER’/’MUSICIAN’. and you’re FEMALE and use SHE/HER? okay, just checking! oh, people say you’re INTUITIVE & DILIGENT but DECEITFUL & RASH? well, i’m sure that you can prove yourself here. you’re looking forward to the HALLOWEEN celebration? that’s a good one, you’ll love it. i have to get going now, bye! [fleur, 19, est, she/her]

i would like to start by saying i’ve played vera once (1 time) before and it was,, so much fun,, the dumbest smart person to exist. i’ve tweaked her bg a little (because..... that’s what happens when you read lucille ball’s autobiography that was SUMN.....), but ! who cares !

update: this got rly long so there’s a tl;dr at the bottom if that better floats your boat !

INTRO-WORTHY STATS

aka, stats that aren’t that deep™

FULL NAME: Vera Floros DOB: August 17th, 1989 AGE: thirty FROM: Abergavenny, Wales OCCUPATION: “fortune teller” & a musician who doesn’t understand marketing ORIENTATION: bisexual CLASS: middle class ( that inheritance kicked in ! )

BACKGROUND:

CHILDHOOD

triggers: parental death, brief mentions of child abuse

alright, vera was born to a very young couple in wales. they’d gotten married fresh out of high school and had a child (her) just two years later. that being said, for about two years after, her mother began distancing herself from the father... not because he was a bad guy, but he moved cities entirely and she was NOT about that.

to be perfectly redundant, for about two years, it was just vera and her mother.

grandparents weren’t about their daughter being married. at 18. did they help pay rent for a separate living space? until vera’s mom was 21, yes. but was she welcomed in their house? lmao!!!!!

THEN her father blew back into town. they reconnected, they both began working more so that vera’s mother didn’t have to rely on her own (we’ll get to her dad’s parent’s in a second).

vera, at the Tender Age of Three™ learned that she was a complete Daddy’s Girl™. although she loved her mom for obvious reasons, she connected with her dad on an entirely different level. he was fun! he was playful! he was young, but he was the perfect dad! he even told dad jokes! which she didn’t get until she was five because three year olds usually aren’t that smart! they did little ‘acrobatic’ things! it was cute and fun and good!

but? this is a roleplay character?

our man died from unexpected heart failure. the autopsy showed an abnormality that hadn’t previously been discovered, and we know our man rarely went to the doctor. vera was six at the time.

her mom: married at 18, mother at 20, widow at 26.

because she and her mom had never developed that Close Bond™, it was difficult for her mother to figure out how to... like... keep her from wandering around... because just telling her not to wasn’t working... so she was like “you know what.... a leash.”

we love ‘puppy’ by george saunders

so whenever her mom was at work and vera wasn’t in school, she was tied to a tree in the backyard.

cruel and unusual punishment!

eventually, her mom kind of just... threw in the towel... she left completely for a change of pace. she said she would be back and that vera would be under the care of her father’s parents in athens until then.

her father’s parents had always been more accepting of the young marriage. they’d been more supportive of them being young parents, in spite of her father having left for a while. they’d definitely been supportive of vera and her mother during that time because they were like “omg mood”

there were a few other kids under their care, all related or not. they did some work for her father’s parents, but nothing very laborious – just sort of... Bonding™ ja feel?

so her mom DID keep her promise and returned three years later when vera was nine. mind you, vera had never held any feelings of resentment towards her mother. when she was six, she... just didn’t get it. at nine, she was old enough to be like “i get u.”

BUT her mother DID get remarried. she didn’t resent her for that, but... she was not fond of the new husband. he wouldn’t accept the ‘dad’ title, was very stern, very serious, made her mom seem like an absolute joy, etc.

but her mom was in love, so what could she do? and then they had a son together, so what could she do? nothing.

that summer, to learn more Discipline™, vera was sent to live with her step-father’s parents in london. boy howdy, it was nothing like her father’s parents! they had a knack for pointing out flaws, induced actual laborious work, constantly quoted the bible at the worst of times, and thought that a single head nod was the equivalent of “good job!” there were a couple of other kids there too, but yikes.

TEENS ( *hang ten emoji* ) + COLLEGE

triggers: brief domestic abuse implications

early was filled with Drama™ surrounding her step-father’s parents and her step-father himself. the overall consensus was that he was not a dope dude, nor were his parents. vera’s mother filed for divorce and gained sole custody of their son (keeping in mind.... she basically already had sole custody of vera.... considering she was her only legal guardian left lmao)

after the divorce was filed, vera’s mother was like “u kno what. my parents hate me. my first husband is dead. my second husband was a douche. i have no reason to be here anymore.” so they went to the land of golden opportunity

but wound up in america instead

(joke patented by dr. doofenshmirtz)

vera, around sixteen at the time (y’all i’m figuring out ages as i go along bear with me), now attended some strange high-school where they were like “fahrenheit.”

by the way! it was in holiday! that’s important to note for possible future connections!

it wasn’t an unwelcome change, though. starting over... was nice...

but the problem was that she was like her father in that she always acted before she thought... which made her a very dumb smart person.

alright get ready for the single idea that drove this entire thing:

she majored in philosophy then was *pikachu shocked face* when she realized there were no jobs out there for philosophy majors.

ADULTHOOD

alright... so what do you do when you have no good opportunities for things in your major?

you would think you would do something like... idk... find a well-paying job that doesn’t require a major?

or maybe a job that just requires experience in ___?

or maybe a job that just requires a bachelor’s degree of any sort?

or maybe a job that doesn’t require a major, but would like a major similar to yours, thus giving you a leg up?

etc.?

lmao no. you go to new orleans and become one of many phony fortune tellers using the one good thing you got from your weird upbringing: easy analysis of body language.

in addition, you try to make something of your life through music, but have no clue what ‘marketing’ is because you really don’t understand social media and probably still have the egg as your twitter profile picture.

what do you mean print is out of style?

what do you mean no one listens to CDs anymore?

what do you mean garageband isn’t acceptable to record on?

that being said, it’s not like... she wasn’t good at it... i mean she was v good at it... but musician is in quotes because she has made NOTHING of her LIFE with it. DOES NOT UNDERSTAND MARKETING.

*sonic kid vc* WHEN WILL YOU LEARN? WHEN WILL YOU LEARN? *end vc*

she got some decent pay from being a ‘fortune teller,’ though. tourists totally flocked and using a fake russian accent helped, as did... just speaking a language they didn’t know while pretending to contact spirits...

at least she’s a good scam artist

can’t market very well, but could probs create the next big ponzi scheme

returned to holiday when she heard news from her brother that her mother had fallen ill.

honestly rest in peace.

is still around because... that’s her home! sentiment! also rip!

also marketing isn’t as hard in holiday so???

also testing fortune telling out in holiday is more interesting so???

DOPE.

PERSONALITY

either really dumb for a smart person or really smart for a dumb person.

still has a childlike trait tbh. i mean when ur growing up just laying beneath child labor laws, ur gonna have to become a kid again eventually.

really bad at technology for reasons unknown to... everyone, but really good at scams.

has not thought before she acted even ONCE.

hasn’t used her degree since she was 22. the closest she’s come is buying some misc. philosophy books and sharing tidbits with strangers.

“now this is a taoist anthem” - vera @ ‘soak up the sun’ by sheryl crow

so many ragrets.

will find a way to bring up she’s half greek in every conversation.

“and i’ve had mental illness since i was in middle school. good night.” - that video someone edited of professor tox

im so bad at personality sections but she’s got a fun one y’all one of the few characters i’ve played who’s had a Sad Backstory™ but wound up being a Fun And Comedic Character™

TL;DR

that was my first time ever writing this whole thing out, so it got real long. so we gonna give a tl;dr:

triggers: v brief mentions of parental death, brief mentions of child abuse, v brief implication of domestic abuse

born to a v young couple in wales. dad was like “brb” then he did, indeed, come rb. loved dad. but dad died when she was six lmao get wreckt this is a roleplay character.

mom was like “idk what 2 do” so she took notes from george saunders’s ‘puppy’ and just tied vera to a tree when she was gone adjsflka. went away for a while and vera stayed with her dad’s parent’s in greece. came back three years later and reunitedanditfeelssogood.mp3.

got married tho and vera was like “i don’t like this guy” and mom was like “i’m having his child.” lived with his parents over the next few summers. they almost violate child labor laws. like. just a hair more. hare? became source of any self-hatred lmao get wreckt

vera’s mom and step-dad divorced bc he was horrible and they moved to holiday when she was sixteen. she left for college when she was eighteen. she decided to major in philosophy which was a bad idea and the source of her entire character.

decided to become a phony fortune teller in new orleans instead of... idk... just getting a job that didn’t require a degree or sumn? pretty successful tho! talked in a fake russian accent around tourists bc? why not?

also did/does music but has no idea how marketing works. bad at social media. records things on garageband. an overall fool. good but a fool.

back in holiday bc mom died lmao get wreckt we’re an orphan now boizzzz

Sad But Rad™

WANTED CONNECTIONS

it’s 2:38AM as i write this part and i still have to go back and include a stats thing bc i love those then post ic but i’ll update this w/ some when im done i suppose?? but we do love brainstorming in this house!!

like this or hmu if you’d like to plot !

#holidcyintro #ok! i said this at the top of the intro but this accidentally got rly long so if reading it all doesn't float ur boat there's a tl;dr at #the bottom!

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bollywood-and-phoenix-feather · 6 years

Text

incomplete list of gay st episodes

happy pride here’s my contribution

season 1:

city on the edge of forever

domestic!au

spock’s Poorly Concealed Jealousy

the actual physical woman jim is supposed to be boning (to spock, on where they belong): “you? at his side, as if you’ve always been there and always will”

p l e a s e

the naked time

I'm choking just thinking about this ok

spock, inhibitions lost, fucking tackling jim about his feelings

h a n d h o l d i n g

canon dialogue: “when I feel friendship for you, I am ashamed”

shore leave

“push...push hard....d i g it I N T H E R E, MISTER SPO --

thankyouyeomanthat’ssufficient”

truly legendary

flirting in life-threatening situations(TM)

the planet gives them whatever they desire most & spock’s travel time is suspiciously fast

the devil in the dark

oh my god

standard Battle Power Couple bullshit

orders? don’t know her. we disobey orders to save each other like MEN

dramatic cave-ins

spock melds with an alien & jim is very close to losing his shit

as usual

operation: annihilate

okay listen basically any episode where spock gets sick/injured is fuckng...Too Much

McCoy: uh jim.......do you not mayhaps have a ship to run??

jim: do I look like i FUCKING care. my bf’s hurt just Do Something

errand of mercy

this episode is so fucking slow

do you know why?

because they can’t. stop flirting.

please y’all are trying to sneak into a compound can you tone it down and FOCUS for two (2) seconds

this side of paradise

this isn’t even that gay it’s just included on principle

did u kno star trek invented sex pollen?

yup.

spock hangs upside-down from a tree just watch it

season 2:

we getting real gay real fast kids

amok time

this is it. this is The Episode. this is the hallowed ground where it all began

seriously watch this Very First about 800000000 fanfic things will make sense

jim & spock Not Looking at each other and discussing Vulcan mating habits

spock about to challenge all Vulcan traditions bringing jim (and bonus bones) down to Vulcan

spock! smiling!

SPOCK! SMILING! AT! JIM!

spock, in full Vulcan mating throes, wrestling jim to the ground

later “huh my mating drive is gone now. fascinating”

spock, logically: ‘I can’t talk about this based on thousands of years of Vulcan privacy”

spock, gayly: “yeah ok jim i’ll tell u”

I can’t even list everything this ep is such bullshit just watch it

mirror mirror

‘if I read my Spocks correctly”

spock w a beard, jim w a cutoff tank. true gay fashion icons

sparkly eyeshadow

spock being ordered to kill jim for his own gain and Not Doing It

u just Kno that jim has to keep reminding himself not to flirt w mirror!spock

bread and circuses

this made me and @phoenixexploded SCREAM in my kitchen

flavius and his cutoff shorts? a Gay McFreakin Icon

u kno that post that’s like ‘gay people don’t know how to use chairs’ yeah

this ep is more mcspock than anything

flirting snark in inopportune situations, including but not limited to: during a fight for their lives, in a prison cell, in a prison cell AGAIN

spock saves bones’ life

bones: “why, you wouldn’t know what to do with a genuine, human emotion --” “really, doctor?” “yeah, i’m worried about jim too”

not mentioned above: the FUCKING sex eyebrows. bones keeps flicking his eyes to spock’s lips.

the sexual tension is eNormous. save them

the ultimate computer

when your bf gets jealous of a computer

bones: spock sure loves that computer

jim: yeah I Hate It. No Reason Why Just a Bad Feeling

Actual Canon Dialogue: “Computers make excellent and efficient servants, but I have no wish to serve under them. Captain, the starship also runs on loyalty to one man, and nothing can replace it, or him.”

friday’s child

jim & bones have a fight & when jim apologizes spock basically tells him off Vulcan-style

uh bones adopts a baby it’s fine

bones is holding hands w this warrior lady and when spock walks by he YANKS his hand out of hers like a guilty kid

spock makes an Angst Face and walks away

there is no context for any of this

bones: “you put one hand here to support its head -- “ spock: “I would rather - I would rather not”

the baby gets named “leonard james” and they’re like spock what a great name right? what do you think?

spock: I think the two of you will be insufferable for a week, captain

journey to babel

fucking. iconique

Worst Meet The Parents Ever

Amanda & Jim bond over being in love with Vulcans

Spock & Sarek bond over their illogical humans

jim pretends he’s not Literally Dying of a stab wound so spock can save his dad

the apple

can you maybe Stop Flirting before you’re all dead

handholding bc why not

spock Yeets Himself in front of a poison dart (for jim ofc) and then tries to say it was the logical course of action

bones calls spock the devil pt 1

a piece of the action

“spocko”

spock says jim’s driving alarms him

this episode is terrible. please watch it

the changeling

spock melds with a computer & gets hurt and jim LOSES IT

no platonic touches we cling to each other’s arms instead

catspaw

this ep is complete batshit

bones calls spock the devil pt 2

kinky dungeon adventures

the deadly years

this shit is ANGSTY

they all start aging really fast ig

jim: ‘i’m not pretty anymore’ spock: I love u anyway captain

spock displaces jim for his own good and jim’s like ‘how could u of all people betray me like this. I thought u LOVED me’

season 3:

and the children shall lead

turbolift makeouts

”my Vulcan friend”

can your bf bring you out of a full-blown, alien-induced panic attack by saying your name one (1) time? no? didn’t think so

need me a freak like THAT

this also made us start shrieking in the kitchen btw. my mom thought we were dying

the tholian web

this is The Angstiest Episode of TOS

they think jim’s dead & can’t stop arguing and it’s Sad

jim leaves them (just Spock and Bones btw) a message to listen to after his death & it’s like ‘trust each other. be strong. love, ur bf’

when they find him he’s like ‘what happened? how’d u get along without me? what did u think of my message”

& they’re like ‘haha what message. nah it was fine.’

jim: yeah sure I call bullshit

whom gods destroy

this megalomaniac captain gets a crush on jim & spock is Not Having It

at various points the bad guy impersonates both of them. both jim and spock can tell that it’s him.

like listen. as a viewer I have the benefit of dramatic timing and background music and I couldn’t even tell

in conclusion, it’s gay, lads. thanks for coming to my tedx talk.

i’ll be back soon with additions esp to season 3. u can’t stop me.

#st #st:tos #star trek #spirk #mcspirk #long post #alyssa

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the-trth-untold · 5 years

Note

now its ur turn. do all of the sweetheart asks.

god jsjsjhdjk im just letting u kno these answers r gonna be BORING but hhhh THANK U

1. Talk about your first love.

i’ve never been in love, never been in a relationship before. BUT i can vaguely remember my first crush back in 2nd grade. all i can remember was that his name was kyle and he was the only boy who ever spoke to me and my brain just went !!!

2. What’s the most beautiful song you’ve ever heard in your opinion?

Break My Heart Again - FINNEAS or What Was Our Love All About - Adrian Milanio and Marylou Villegas

these are just two that i can think of there are A LOT of beautiful songs

3. How’s your heart feeling right now?

fine??

4. What kind of self care is your favorite to do?

i dont really do any self care things??

5. What’s your skincare routine?

i dont do any skincare routines either... ik im a monster

6. How did you get to be so beautiful?

u must be blind if u think that

7. Do you have any stuffed animals?

i used to have over 50 stuffed animals, i would always place them all over my bed neatly but i got rid of them now :(

8. Best trip you’ve ever been on?

Myrtle Beach, SC because it was my first vacation spot and i was so happy seeing two dolphins close to the shore

9. Favorite thing about your room?

the color of my walls and blankets lol mint green and peach colors

i dont have anything cool in my room

10. Opinion on love?

i mean, it’d be nice to experience it some day and i hope i do but right now im content being by myself

11. Are you affectionate?

if i know you very well i can be, if not im very awkward and will barely make any eye contact with you

12. Who do you look up to?

i look up to people who have struggled a lot in their life, people who can be optimistic in any situation

13. Favorite poet?

i dont read much poetry, but i loved reading some things Emily Dickinson has published

14. Song that makes you happy? How about one that calms you down when you’re in a bad place?

honestly any disney song makes me happy! im a huge disney nerd and listening to any of those songs makes me feel nostalgic.

when im in a bad place, any slow, ballad sounding song can calm me down

15. Do you play an instrument?

i played the flute in middle school but dropped it after less than a week LOL

16. Do you do art? Using what (pencil, watercolor, etc)?

i like doing digital art but im not good at it and i dont have adobe illustrator anymore so i haven’t done anything recently

17. Do you dance? What style of dance?

i cannot dance and no one will make me

IM TOO EMBARRASSED EVEN IF IM ALONE HAHAHA

18. What’s your zodiac sign? Do you believe in astrology?

im a libra

i somewhat believe in astrology, i know there’s more to it than just your sun sign and there are different placements that make you different from the stereotypical traits people use for each sign

a lot of the “things about each sign” can be used for anyone because the responses can be very vague and many people can relate to

19. Favorite old film?

too many

the shining, the breakfast club, carrie, pretty in pink, etcetcetc

20. What’s your hairstyle?

idk its a mess

curly/wavy and i have hardcut bangs

21. What weather is the most beautiful, in your opinion?

fall weather, where its like 50 F (or 10 C for all u weirdos out there), cold enough to put on a flannel and boots

22. What upsets you most about the world?

i only have two hands but there are so many cats and dogs. i cannot pet all of them. (IM SORRY THIS WAS UR ANSWER DASHA BUT IM KEEPING IT ITS SO CUTE AND FUNNY AND I RELATE)

23. Are you in love right now?

24. Do you have a crush? If so, talk about them!

i dont have a crush lol

25. Do you have pets? Talk about something sweet about them!

yes!!! i have two gorgeous puppies!!! if u wanna check them out u can follow my instagram i post them all the time @ the.moon.atomic

they’re such dorks but they fit my household idk how to describe it they just belong in my house hahha

26. Do you have a lucky number?

i dont really believe in lucky numbers

27. Have you ever wished on a star? What about on a fallen eyelash?

no, and i never heard about wishing on a fallen eyelash haha

28. Do you believe emoji spells to work?

no???????? i dont even know what that is

29. Do you believe in magic in general?

30. What’s the most beautiful thing in life, In your opinion?

when people finally stop hiding their true selves, show their real smiles, and laugh so hard they snort

idk i just love people, well, most anyway sjsjhzjdsk

31. Opinion on the color pink? What about baby blue?

love them

theyre such pure colors and they just remind me of newborn babies hahaha

32. What instrumental sound is your favorite?

piano definitely

33. Do you like the sound of wind? What about the sound of rain?

yes! yes to both! i love rain more though, sorry wind

34. Who makes you happy?

my friends, family, and my mutuals

35. What makes you happy?

listening to music

36. Imagine your ideal life, the life you wish to make, what will that look like?

ohh well i’d be living on germany for starters hahaha

id like to have my own house, maybe living with a best friend

definitely like 5784538902 cats and dogs, i love them

at some point id like to have a relationship LOL

37. Do you wear makeup? If so what’s your favorite type of makeup or specific makeup product? Favorite store to buy makeup?

only on rare days ill put on makeup, i only use eyeshadow, liner, and mascara and ive never gone to a store thats just for make up, i just go to a pharmacy lol

38. Do you wear dresses? If so what’s your favorite dress you own?

only if i absolutely have to, the dress i wore for my senior pictures is my favorite

39. Ever been heartbroken? How do you deal with it?

noo, ive never been in a relationship

40. Who’s your closest friend? What do you love about them?

i kinda really dont have one, not irl anyway

@neo-bangtan @mini-pretzel are my closest friends online, i love everything about u guys

41. Introvert or extrovert?

introvert

42. Do you like MBTI? What’s your MBTI?

im isfj

43. Would you be a fairy, a mermaid, a vampire, a siren, or an angel?

uh idk?? i wouldnt want to be immortal so

44. What’s the best song a friend has ever introduced to you?

acid jazz singer - the fratellis

45. Parlez-vous français?

no my french sucks

46. Most beautiful place you’ve been to?

honestly i cant think of any place pennsylvania sucks ahhaha

47. Where/when do you truly feel at home?

home...... my bed...... LOL

48. Does smiling put you in a better mood? Try it right now, you’re smile is gorgeous!

only if im not looking at myself lol

49. Favorite shoe you own?

slip ons or my new balance

50. Can you walk in stilettos? Do you like them?

N O i am so accident prone i can barely walk barefoot without tripping

51. Do you feel loved?

kinda? sometimes?

52. How do you express love to those you care about?

just giving them a hug lol or saying i love you

53. Favorite term(s) of endearment?

no ones ever called me any but i like baby, im a simple girl

54. Most romantic thing someone’s ever done for you?

nothing?

55. When is the happiest you’ve ever been?

meeting new people who share the same interests

56. Are you happy right now?

im pretty neutral atm

57. What makes you smile?

really awful jokes that ARENT EVEN FUNNY AND TALKING DASHA AND KARINA

58. Do you laugh a lot?

i guess??

59. What’s your favorite kind of aesthetic?

soft vibes i guess haha

60. Do you want to marry for love or for some other reason (like money)?

i dont see myself marrying but if i would it would definitely be for love

61. What would your dream wedding look like? Do you want to get married?

i dont really want to get married, most of the time it ends in divorce and theres just a lot of paper work and its a hassle i dont see a point in it

62. Favorite flower?

hydrangeas

63. Favorite artist?

edgar degas

64. Favorite music artist?

bts lol

65. How kind do you think you are? Is kindness important to you?

i try to be kind to everyone, i dont know if others perceive me that way but i think kindness is very important to me

66. Ever made a playlist for someone?

once and i loved it, pls ask me to make a playlist for u

67. Do you have anything you do to physically comfort you when your sad? Such as a favorite blanket? Or a relaxing bath?

music and a soft blanket

68. Early bird or night owl?

early bird

69. Morning routine?

wake up, look in the mirror, look away from the mirror, go back to bed. (AGAIN THIS IS UR ANSWER DASHA BUT IM KEEPING IT HHAHAHAHA)

70. Night routine?

shower and watch netflix until i fall asleep

71. What is the most lovely quality a person could have in your opinion?

being humble

72. Do you cry often? Does crying help you get the emotions out? Do you feel better after?

yes yes and yes

im such a cry baby i will cry at everything if u yell at me or if disappoint u im so sensitive

73. Do you like hugs?

yes but i dont receive many hugs

74. When was the last time you kissed someone?

never

75. Are you small or tall?

small, 5′4 or 164cm

76. Do you like wholesome memes?

who doesnt

77. Favorite thing about the past?

anything that makes me feel nostalgic

78. Do you ever wonder about the future?

yes

79. Have you ever lived in a different country than you currently live in?

nooo

80. Do you like plane flights? Airports?

ive never been on a plane

81. Sunrises or sunsets?

sunsets

82. The beach or a forest?

beach

83. What time of day do you tend to be in the best mood?

when im sleeping lol

84. Do you push yourself to act together and in a good mood even when you aren’t?

i try to

85. Favorite kind of tree?

what kind of question is this i dont know anything about trees

86. Do you care about the health of the Earth?

i want to but i dont do anything for it

87. What did you like most about your childhood, if anything?

fieldtrips in school

88. Do you read a lot? What’s your favorite book?

i try to read more, my favorite book is more happy than not

89. What are you most nostalgic for at the moment?

disney, i just put my christmas tree down and the ornaments are disney characters

90. What’s your favorite personality trait you have?

honesty i guess?

91. List at least ONE thing you love about your appearance.

my eyes

92. When was the last time you truly felt calm, without much of anything to worry about?

after i bathe

93. Do you worry a lot?

yes all the time

94. The dazzling lights of the city or the relaxing countryside?

dazzling lights of the city

95. Ever changed the shoelaces on one of your shoes? For what reason?

96. Favorite pastry?

??????????? i dont know??????????

97. Do you like doing little acts of kindness?

YEAH

98. How’s your day/night going?

fine so far, i dont have to work today so im just chillaxing

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finsaraan · 6 years

Text

i just want you to know - this is the abridged version. i wrote something longer. and it was really prosey fancy and vaguely like an actual ficlet, but i felt like, there isn’t a chance in hell of anybody finishing this unless i file off at least a few paragraphs and fill it with the amusing use of casual language and luis-from-ant-man-style retellings to juxtaposition the setting and theme of the story being told

anyway @kohledtouch @championofstendarr @laelaloola (especially u u agreed to this and u didn’t even kno, this is a lesson in looking before u leap) y’all enabled this, gotta face the consequences of ur actions hit me up w/ how many paragraphs u got in before ur soul left ur body and idk what i’ll owe u but i’ll owe u something LMAO

Well he’s Titus Mede II’s son and his name is Alexandros and his mum is Olympias the emperor’s second wife and she married him when she was 17 bc her family wanted the power and she’s a descendant of a usurped Septim emperor from way yonder through the mists of time. So she has this baby boy, hooray, he’s adorable with his wavy blond hair and his odd eyes, one’s blue one’s green, and he spends his childhood frolicking barefoot through the White Gold Tower’s private gardens which it would realistically have as the home of the royal family, and chilling with the soldiers in the barracks, and the grooms in the stables, learning filthy language and all about war. His parents don’t get on because his mum doesn’t take shit lying down and doesn’t and never did love her husband, so if he’s remotely rude to her, which he can be because he’s just like that but also stressed all the time, she snaps right back and then he snaps back because he’s a proud man and not good at apologising and then it spirals out of control.

One day in particular when Alexandros is four, it’s soon after the death of his older sister, who was the crown princess and very capable and absolutely doted on by the emperor who’s distraught about it still, he goes to his mum’s room late at night only for the emperor to come in soon after absolutely sloshed, immediately getting his kit off, and Olympias, hoping to make him go away and also shield her baby’s eyes, hides Alexandros and says ‘no we can’t do the do it’s that time of the month’ but he’s like ‘you said that a week ago you HAG’ but now that she has her baby she’s feeling very protective so she snaps right back more viciously than usual so they start a proper shouting match until Alexandros bursts out screaming SHE HATES YOU GO AWAY GO AWAY, only to be grabbed by a stunned and horrified and slightly embarrassed (bc hes naked) emperor and tossed quite violently from the room. He’s caught by the guard on duty who takes good care of him while he screams because honestly that was a pretty traumatic experience. Once he’s put to bed and then up the next morning he doesn’t remember it, but it does scar him psychologically. The marriage goes downhill quite badly from there, it was their worst argument yet, there were a lot of insults, Titus feels very attacked by his now-crown-prince son’s apparent hatred of him, Olympias is livid that he handled her baby so roughly - it all makes everyone bitter.

Now when Alexandros is seven his education has yet to start and he’s a bit too cosy with the common soldiery that man the Tower, as someone puts it ‘he speaks as if he was conceived against a barrack wall’. Also, he hasn’t had a lot of interaction with his father, who doesn’t have time for children really and is still kinda put off by That Incident and by the very guarded way his son looks at him when the boy’s brought up for inspection days that let Titus see how he’s doing. So Titus thinks, to get him away from his mother’s influence, because she’s probably turning the boy against him (tbf she is), he’ll send him off to Cloud Ruler Temple to be mentored by this Penitus Oculatus commander called Leonidas. Leonidas thinks Alexandros is a spoilt brat. He has the child doing a soldier’s training from dawn until dusk, feeds him two spare meals a day, gives him shitty blankets and makes him sleep outside if he’s been disobedient (and if it’s not gonna kill him), and while this does mean that Alexandros is really good at taking hardship when he’s older - his soldiers will love him because he’s known for refusing to take food, water, or shelter if there isn’t enough for every single man - it’s also frankly irresponsible on Leonidas’s part, because he chronically underfeeds a growing boy, and Alexandros ends up significantly shorter than average for the rest of his life.

Now he’s twelve and his training with Leonidas is done, so he’s back home. He sings at a court banquet and a grumpy Titus Mede - who thinks he sounds a lot like his mother when he sings and is REALLY put off by it - humiliates him in front of everyone by telling him it’s a stupid waste of time for a prince to learn an instrument. Alexandros runs away and blackmails a soldier he knows, who's travelling home to sort a blood feud, into taking Alexandros with him. There’s a battle between two tiny villages and Alexandros makes his first kill, takes the head home, and feels a lot better knowing he is officially A Man at twelve when his dad didn’t have HIS first kill until he was sixteen. Now Alexandros gets his own retinue, a bunch of generals’ sons around his age, and he meets HEPHAESTION. Hephaestion is a babe, they hit it off immediately, and it’s barely any time at all before they’re completely inseparable. They’re soulmates. The same day that they meet, Alexandros makes another lifelong friend - the stallion Bucephalus, who nearly tramples some people in a panic at a horse fair, but Alexandros realises it's been mistreated and gentles it until it lets him ride it, ooh ahh very dramatic and you bet your ass Hephaestion is swooning in the background.

Fifteen years old, Alexandros is sent off with his friends to study some real important shit like philosophy and morality with a former Psijic monk (who isn’t actually former he says that but actually he’s an active Psijic - they sent him to try and influence Alex to take a good and wholesome path) called Aristotle. Alexandros never gets the hang of magic but he likes medicine and learning about nature and discussing abstract topics. Supposedly, doing this all in some chateau out in buttfuck nowhere is so he doesn’t get distracted but once again, Titus wants to separate Alexandros and his mother. The only time Alexandros leaves is to be summoned to various battles or sieges around the provinces for experience and because he and his father get on quite well when they’re out on campaign, they think the same tactically and Alex does admire his father really, he just feels guilty because his mother’s a woman with drama and flare running through her blood (descended from Tiber Septim rememeber), and lets him know when she feels betrayed. It’s a very emotionally scarring situation, because he can’t please one parent without angering the other. But on campaign it’s ok. He flourishes, he’s clearly got the knack, and the soldiers really love him ‘cause he comes into the healers’ tents to talk to the wounded men and tell them how brave they were. He’s got an incredible memory for names and faces, he never forgets anyone he’s met, and it’s a big thing when you’re just some lowly soldier and the crown prince remembers you and says he saw you, first up the wall in that siege, terrific job mate. He really craves the adoration of his people, it’s so much simpler than the mess his family is in. Be nice, make an effort, the lads love you. No nonsense there.

Sixteen now, he’s left as regent (of the entire empire!) when the emperor goes off on a longer campaign, but has to embark on his own one when there’s an issue with a big load of Forsworn. He does insanely well. He’s sixteen. Sixteen! Half of the enemies he comes across can’t even take him seriously, until he slaughters them. You stop laughing pretty fast when Alexandros’s legion comes at you. More than that, he gets there from the Imperial City faster than the soldiers sent from actual Skyrim, and they show up half way through like ‘whu?’ but Alexandros ropes them in no-nonsense and as they incredulously ask the Imperial soldiers ‘how old is this guy?’ they’re just given a knowing look and told ‘wait ‘till you see him in action, then you’ll know’.

At seventeen (he’s up to a lot now) his mum is pestering him to start churning out bastards because he’s unusually celibate for his age and status. She’s feeling very insecure because she’s engaged in some political fights and frankly the only reason she’s alive is because she’s wife of the emperor and mother of the crown prince; if she looses that status, she’s a goner, and at the moment the only reason she’s still married to Titus is because if he divorces her he weakens Alexandros’s claim to the throne and that could be chaos if Titus were to unexpectedly perish. So a potential heir from Alexandros would strengthen her position, and also give her another baby, which she wants because she’s feeling very excluded from Alexandros’s life. Rather than inevitably fail to walk the tightrope between his parents, he’s taken to only speaking to them when summoned, and confiding in Hephaestion for everything instead. After Alexandros dodges a series of prostitutes sent by his mother to get him producing and maybe separate him from Hephaestion a little, he pretends he slept with one to get his mother off his back, and ends up, in the aftermath, getting jiggy with Hephaestion for the first time instead. They’re as madly in love as ever. All their friends can tell It’s Happened, and some bets are finally won.

Now shit goes terribly wrong, and it’s about to get convoluted - the emperor takes a fancy to the daughter of one of his generals, Attalos. If she becomes his mistress, and has his children, and Titus really takes a shine to her, her noble birth makes her a really strong candidate for marriage, PLUS, Attalos is rumoured to be a Thalmor informant. That would put Olympias and Alexandros in the doghouse and in serious danger, but take a big weight off Titus’s shoulders, because he no longer has a mortal enemy in his house and a son influenced by said mortal enemy. Alexandros just tries not to rock the boat. On the return from a state visit, father and son and entourage are hosted by Attalos at his villa on the road. Attalos gets drunk and alludes to the potential union, suggesting any children from it are better than a child of Olympias, and then he insults Olympias a lot, thinking he’s being subtle, but he’s not, because he’s completely smashed. Alex is pissed. When he calls Attalos the fuck out, Titus gets pissed at him and tells him to check himself. Alex calls out him next, telling him to stand up for his own heir, unless he’s a desperate old man who’ll lick Attalos’s feet he’s that thirsty for the man’s daughter, who is frankly much too young for his old ass - also, they all know the rumours, Attalos is a filthy Thalmor informant, so he’s probably trying to suck up to them as well.

(The retelling of this gets him a lot of points amongst Thalmor-haters and if you hear it retold in certain places the string of inventive insults that prefix ‘Thalmor’ is about as long as the entire rest of the story.)

Titus is pissed, as you would be, to the point of drawing his sword, maybe a bit extreme, but he trips and falls on his face. Alexandros utters the immortal line ‘look, men, who the people thought would cross the tyrants for them - and he falls crossing from couch to couch’. Alexandros then has to book it, taking Olympias to her relatives in High Rock, then disappearing himself into the Druadach Mountains. He pisses Titus off for a bit by making it seems like he might be gathering allies in the mountains to go to war, but eventually messengers get sent back and forth and after a lot of debate, a peace is agreed to, and Alex and Olympias are welcomed back to the Imperial City. Things are still hella tense. Hoping to fix this, Titus sends Alexandros into Skyrim to deal with this civil war business that’s popped up, planning on following along later because his health is real fucked up just then. He’s been in a lot of battles, he’s like swiss cheese at this point.

Now at this point if I’m feeling indulgent, this is the point at which Alexandros turns out to be the Last Dragonborn and has to deal with all that shit. Otherwise, he just shows up and does his Alexandros thing, which is kicking ass and actually trying really hard to come to a peace agreement. The emperor wants to crush the Stormcloak rebellion entirely, but if Alexandros were to get his way - you know, like if he were to suddenly and unexpectedly become emperor himself - his offered treaty to Ulfric would be a formal apology for the failure of his father to honour his title as protector of the realm and chosen of the Divines; an offer of total religious autonomy, total autonomy in the deciding of any High King or Queen; and a getout clause that lets Skyrim legally secede from the empire if the jarls together decide that the current emperor/empress is failing in his or her duty to protect the rights and well-being of the citizens of Skyrim, failing to honour the gods that put them on their throne, offending egregiously the cultural beliefs of the people of Skyrim, or proving themself unworthy of the respect and power of the Ruby Throne.

Alexandros is real fucking confident. And he enjoys the enormous ‘fuck you’ he’s sending to any future rulers that don’t live up to these standards, because even if the treaty focuses on Skyrim, is they were to pull that getout clause and secede, everyone would follow whether it applies to them or not.

Back in Cyrodiil, while Alexandros is either being Dragonborn or not, the emperor is making plans to divorce Olympias and marry Attalos’s daughter but with legislation that secures Alexandros’s position as heir, hoping it’ll placate him even though his mother’s just been slapped in the face essentially. And on top of that, there’s a member of the Elder Council called Pausanias Orestes - he and the emperor were bang-mates, once upon a time, but Pausanias got dumped for a younger, hotter bloke. Pissed, Pausanias calls the guy a lil’ bitch, and the guy goes and gets himself killed being extra in battle to prove that he’s not. His kin, upset, have their revenge on Pausanias in a very dark and disturbing way because they don’t want to kill him because he’s still on fairly good terms with the emperor. Pausanias entreats the emperor to get him justice. Titus makes Pausanias head of his bodyguard, which is a very big favour, but doesn’t punish them that abused Pausanias. Eventually, Pausanias becomes a member of the Elder Council. Now here’s the thing; who’s the man that did that to Pausanias? It’s general Attalos, father of the girl emperor Titus Mede wants to marry, the man that’s about to achieve a real big power boost just by getting his daughter to bang the emperor. Oh dear. And guess who was with the entourage that stayed at Attalos’s villa the night of the bust up that Alexandros ended up having to flee; who had to stay in the house of the man that had wronged him and never been punished for it? Pausanias. Alexandros noticed this incredible cruelty at the time and apologised to Pausanias for it. Pausanias likes Alexandros for that reason. So when someone comes to Pausanias and says; we want to assassinate the emperor, and Alexandros is in on it, will you go to Skyirm and hire the Dark Brotherhood? Pausanias says yes. The thing is, Alexandros isn’t in on it; he’s far too pious to ever consider killing his own father. But there are those that thing the Medes are getting a little out of hand and if they all happened to die then that would be very handy for certain point-eared control-freaks who have a violent need to be absolute cunts and are the Tamrielic equivalent of that person who comes into your inbox and nitpicks your TES lore knowledge in a very condescending way, especially over things that are honestly subjective.

#( ;; ooc )#( ;; mun speaks )#What Have I Done #honestly? if anyone's device doesn't do the readmore and makes them see the whole post on the dashboard #TELL ME #i'll fuckin get rid of it #u dont deserve that #long post for ts #in case #also like that shit abt pausanias 100% tru alex the greats dad got shanked by his former bf #what a way to go

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cyrataheri · 6 years

Text

— {cyra taheri} !!

hey wassup hello!!! this is faye and i’m sooooooo v excited to be apart of this cute lil family!! ahhhhhh!!!! anyway its currently 3am and my laptop has been so slow and lagging a lot so apologies for my messy theme and even messier intro!!! i briefly managed to write this lil intro for my baby angel cy!!!! i hope ya vibe with her n if u do n u wanna plot then pls feel free to like this post or send me a msg!!!! :~) nw im gnna go to bed n lurk on mobile <3 <33

things you should know

cyra ‘cy’ comes from a very rich and elite family

despite having things handed to her on a silver platter, she had a hard time growing up

she didn’t have many friends or any social life rly outside of school

she was restricted from many things including the things she loved!! such as art and sports since she was always making a mess or getting dirty

she’s been constantly told that she wasn’t “feminine” enough and her actions aren’t very ladylike

after graduating high school she thought uni would be her way out, regardless of the pretentious university she’d applied to, at least she’d be away from home—but no!! as always, her parents disregarded whatever she had to say and didn’t think her education was important bc her duties as an elite lil lady haven’t finished yet!!!

she was set to have an arranged marriage to this guy she’d never met cause it would b good 4 family business!!!

n thats when she was like nuh uh fuck that and decided to runaway to vancouver where she decided to study

anyway she did some lil hannah montana magic 2 herself n decided 2 go from cyra taheri to just cy ((so they don’t find her u kno??? that miley stewart ish))

a bit about her personality

she doesn’t it like it when people pity her or do things for her she’s very independent and self-reliant.

she’s also very guarded and closed off, but at the same time really friendly and approachable.

she’s kinda confusing?? one day she’s the life of the party and everyone’s favorite social butterfly but the next day she could be as cold as ice in the comfort of her own solitude, very unpredictable!!

she just has a lot of trust-issues n finds it hard 2 completely open up to anyone

she’s just been hurt a lot bc she was the sweetest n most naive lil angel but look where that got her!!!! so she’s just trying 2 avoid looking weak nd have anyone use her ((just tryna protect herself even if she might b a bit harsh sometimes!!!)

she’s can be v stubborn n hot tempered, and an all over emotional mess!!

but overall her heart is in the right place, the main reason she didn’t want to go through with the arranged marriage is because shes a hopeless romantic, all her life she’s been deprived of emotional intimacy whether it was romantic or platonic, she just wants to feel real, important, loved and cared about bc beneath the surface she has the softest and biggest heart and can be overly selfless and generous once she lets u in!!!

ugh this is really shit and i apologize but u guys have no idea how to difficult it is to type when ur laptop is freezing every 10 seconds jtgjtgkt i promise i’ll write something more eloquent and informative later!!!!!!

#van.intro #intro:cy.

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rosirae-a · 6 years

Text

first, context. ok so i already wrote abt it in the replies of this post but i figured this would be easier for people to reblog in this format & i can maybe write a bit more abt it.

the reason why cisswaps, rule 64/63 or whatever the rule is, also known as GENDERBENDS are transphobic are the usual reasons: invalidating trans ppl, etc. etc. etc. i won’t repeat that, because if you weren’t listening then chances are you won’t now.

though even KNOWING JUST THAT—that it invalidates trans ppl—y’all cis ppl won’t stop. like c’mon that’s all you should have 2 kno tbh. there’s already sumthin wrong w that.

still, though, hopefully i can clear things up a lil bit, & PLEASE TALK TO ME if u have more questions instead of vaguing at me or w/e. i’m so sick of seeing genderbends tbh. final note: i’m not tryna attack you, so don’t use that as an excuse to not listen.

so sum1 brought up the following idea (which i’m glad they did, since y’all need to tell us what’s confusing u so we can explain it. maybe logic will work ? who would’ve thought — sorry i’m salty):

Its funny how many people will say “I won’t interact with cisswaps they’re transphobic whats in their pants shouldn’t matter!” yet a lot of the time when they make muses trans they’ll usually swap their birth sex, usually to take a canon male muse and making them female-at-birth but now a transman instead of making them a transwoman or something, or just leaving them as their canon sex in the first place. Because what’s in their pants doesn’t matter, right. Has no one else caught this hypocrisy?

frankly, i can see where you might be a lil confused, if u’re viewing it that way/ so lemme clear a couple things up. i think a lot of the problem is people not seeing how writing characters as trans isn’t cisswapping/genderbending/w/e.

NOTE: the following is mostly applicable to mtf & ftm, though people who are other genders may also identify as trans, like me, whomst identifies as masc nb. this is not to ignore them; i would like to recognize them but focus on what the community generally identifies as a trans person when they’re writing noncis characters, since typically they’ll just call those ‘nonbinary,’ which they are as well. (it’s an individual choice to be called whichever, or both.)

first of all, whether the interpretation of the muse is cis or trans, the idea is that they end up with their canon gender.

this means that even if you have a muse that’s ftm (born female, identifying as male,) but they’re canonly identifying as feminine, that’s bad. that’s transphobic. we’re not excusing that, that’s some nasties who think they can get away with it cause their muse is trans ‘uwu u can’t hurt us !!!’ nope. still bad.

EDIT: I WROTE mtf INSTEAD OF ftm IN THE ORIGINAL POSTING OF THIS. mtf WOULD’VE BEEN FINE.

why is it bad? because that is basically cisswapping, but trying to cover it by saying that “no it’s just trans hcs.” that’s just as bad, so don’t get that idea in your heads that that’s okay, either.

if you say that a cis masc person is the “same thing” as someone who is trans mtf, by following the idea above of it being okay (since it’s “not really transphobic,” as some people claim, which the op of the confession noticed & rightfully identified as wrong) that’s nasty because it’s insinuating that even if someone is trans, it’s their sex that matters. cisswaps work similarly.

why are either of those bad? first of all, because trans people say so. but that’s not enough for you guys, clearly, so let me try to explain it another way:

it isn’t a cisswap when someone is trans mtf when their canon gender is female. that entire thought—that someone is cisswapped if their gender doesn’t match their sex—is inherently transphobic, because it’s saying that their sex is more important than their gender; that they aren’t “truly female.”

it’s okay that you may have thought that way. recognize it for what it is—a transphobic thought—and move on. you may think transphobic thoughts, but you can recognize them for what they are & move past them. it’s a significant step.

also, please note that y’all, when focusing on sex vs gender, ignore the fuck out of intersex people, whether y’all are cis or w/e. that’s a whole nother can of worms, though, so i’ll move on.

what we mean by “what’s in their pants doesn’t matter” isn’t that sex doesn’t matter—it does, to some extent. it changes their experiences if they are trans (having to bind, general dysphoria, etc.), & i can see that some of y’all wanna write about that.

but recognize that if you’re just trying to make them the “opposite sex” (again, real quick, reminder that intersex ppl exist,) to change that, you’re also harming millions of people. so maybe lay off on that. instead, you can have them deal with that but also be the same canon gender. that’s chill.

trans ftm ppl have to deal with sexist actions on the daily, just like cis fem ppl, or generally fem presenting people do. so y’all can have ur little ‘what if’s without being transphobic. y’all can write abt how sexist things are, or the different expectations that both men & women face (talking about them as society views them, as again intersex people) without being transphobic.

if you want to write that sort of stuff, just change their sex, not their gender. some mtf people will face sexism, though, to be clear, notably if they look female/passable for “naturally” female. (again, gross, since that implies being trans isn’t natural/it’s a choice beyond whether to actually transition.) however, it is because of that concept that you don’t have to cisswap to write your ‘uwu how’d it be different’ stuff.

they’re the same person, no matter what sex. their personality, won’t change, though maybe their views on how they experience the world — that you can easily also address by just writing a trans character. it’s that simple.

however, you should not write about transitioning & other trans experiences if you yourself are not trans. again, another can of worms, though. just take my word for it—and the hundreds of other trans ppl in our community that have to see themselves being invalidated & misrepresented every day.

when you have a genderbend, you’re saying that what’s in their pants does matter, past their daily experience (that tbh is often sexist bc often they’ll be written as shyer if they’re a female or w/e but another can of worms)

before you tell me you’re not saying that, rmmr that you’re insinuating that the character can’t be the same gender even if they’re another sex by saying that it’s cisswapping.

to finish this already too-long post:

your muse can be whatever sex you like, just keep the gender the same. (loosely, ofc, as they can be interpreted as being a diff gender canonly, such as demiboy or w/e)

#ok 2 rb /#actually pls rb if u can #( * ∘ ∙ ——ᴘssᴛ ɪ ɢᴏᴛ sᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ₂ sᴀʏ. / psa )#long post /#transphobia /#discourse /#i haven't read this over #so i might edit tomorrow #but yeah #i think a lot of the problem #is ppl not seeing how cisswapping #& writing a muse as trans #is different #hopefully this helps !

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