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ihhfhonao3 · 7 months

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Look, I love a good media theory as much as the next guy, but so many of them, especially theories for kids shows, are lowkey ableist.

“Dark things you never knew about Fairly OddParents! Number one: Timmy is schizophrenic!”

“Dark fact: Owl from Winnie the Pooh has NPD!!”

“Scary theory says that Sandy from SpongeBob has Borderline Personality Disorder!”

Like I’m sorry if you maybe overlooked the implications of what you were saying, but are you implying that disorders, disabilities and divergences are “scary” and “dark?” Because I’m not sure that’s a hill you want to die on.

#this is not about headcanons because most headcanons I’ve seen are out of genuine love and interpretation of a character #plus actually disabled people relating to a specific character and their struggle. not some abled nt claiming that the idea of #Bipolar Disorder is “spooky”. if you are disabled and see yourself in a character that’s absolutely wonderful. go forth and headcanon #but most of these theories are kinda harmful like. Do you honestly think that DID is scary? if you met someone with DID would you run away #screaming? I hope not because that’s a really shitty thing to do!#Tldr disabled people are people too and they deserve good rep. this includes “gross” and “scary” disabled people #disabilities #disabled #disability #disability pride #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #neurodivergence #ableism #ableist language cw #tw ableist language #fuck ableists #ableist bullshit

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angria · 1 month

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CW: Christianity, Scripture, shitty theology

My mother got sucked into some bullshit Bible study with her "friend," who is fire and brimstone Baptist, and it's so fucking shitty. She called me with questions because a lot of the "study" seemed questionable and didn't sit right with her.

So I completely geeked out and spent the evening yesterday doing research and typing up notes for her, including breaking out my Greek notes and NT. Then I went over them with her this morning so she could be prepared for her first meeting with her friend.

She called me afterwards and said the whole made her feel so bad. When my mother challenged one of the study's statements "sin disqualifies us from a relationship with God" (which infuriated me...there is nothing we could ever do to lose His love and grace), her friend said God is a wrathful god. ARGGGG. Absolutely not and a complete manipulation of Scripture and theology (and no, there are not two different gods between the Hebrew Tanakh and NT...scripture was written by humans, through human interpretation attempting to make sense of a divine being).

Even that made me feel bad second-handedly. So I reviewed my notes from J's sermons over the years and it just made me miss him so much. He always, always made the effort to remind us that we are God's Beloved and nothing can ever change that.

I miss him. So damn much.

#shut up and sit down #christianity #fire and brimstone religion #religion #theology #scripture #God #talks with J #angriadm

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sweetandsavageautistic · 5 years

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(CW: Sex, infantilization)

So someone shared this photo on one of the autism Facebook groups I’m in and it’s fucking hysterical to me, for some reason:

Like, us having sex shocks the privileged neurotypical Nancy.

Oh no. We do people things too. How TERRIBLE. XD

Honestly Nancy’s got issues. I bet you she’d say that if WE tried to initiate sex, we wouldn’t know what we were doing.

#cw nt bullshit #nt bullshit #autism #autistic #actuallyautistic #actually autistic #sweet and savage autistic

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decafdino · 3 years

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oh how I long for a movie that deconstructs stupid beliefs about autism written by neurodivergents and played by an autistic actor that is literally about showing how stupid these assumptions about autistics are when applied to neurotypical people

NT person: *sees autistic person petting a cat*

NT: Ah I see. Your Autism Disorder has given you the superpower to communicate with animals on a level that no one around you understands. This is tragic, because it further isolates you--

Person with Autism: No?

NT: But you are talking to a cat because you feel Alone and Isolated--

AP: I can’t talk to animals, dude

NT: But!!! Your Autism, it’s supposed to give you superpowers in exchange for you being tragically unable to understand human emotion, which will most likely mean you’ll end up alone for all of your life!

AP: Do you even know what autism is?

#autism #neurodivergent #neurodivergents do interact #someone please add on to this with more NT bullshit #music #sia music #sia movie #cw ableism #tw ableism #actually autistic

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zonkutonshorrifyingpeenie · 2 years

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(cw: self-injury, meltdowns, neurotypical nonsense)

Dear google

If I, an autistic adult, is searching for things pertaining to helping me stop my "bash and scratch at my face until I look like the communal victim in a barfight" seizure meltowns... I am absolutely NOT searching for pages upon pages of NT bullshit about how "scary" my meltdowns are to witness nor am I looking at literally any site that advocates for punishment of any kind to children already suffering enough.

Do better.

#like literally why is it so fucking difficult to find literally any resource Actually Aimed at the autistic person?#i want to stop hitting myself not read up on how idiots are abusing their children #haretalks

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cllynchauthor · 5 years

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On Aspie Supremacy and the Aspergian

CW: bullying, suicide, aspie supremacy

I feel the need to talk to you guys about what has been happening on autistic twitter lately surrounding the autistic website The Aspergian. I write for The Aspergian. Here are some of my articles:

https://theaspergian.com/2019/05/04/its-a-spectrum-doesnt-mean-what-you-think/

https://theaspergian.com/2019/04/19/person-first/

https://theaspergian.com/2019/04/05/7-cool-aspects-of-autistic-culture/

While I am white, cishet, and speaking, I am in the minority at The Aspergian.

The majority of contributors are mostly either LGBTQIA+, BIPOC, or high support needs.

Here are some of their contributions:

https://theaspergian.com/2019/10/10/stopping-the-stigma-against-people-with-disabilities-interview-with-sbsk/

https://theaspergian.com/2019/09/09/10-signs-i-was-transgender-but-didnt-know-it/

https://theaspergian.com/2019/08/08/the-cage/

Despite this, the name The Aspergian makes many autistic people uncomfortable. Several ASAN members have spoken out condemning the name.

In these days of #AltAutism, the autistic dark web and other aspie supremacists have turned the word Aspergers into a borderline slur.

Aspergers and “Aspergian” are becoming dog whistles for function labels, white supremacy and incels.

The founder of The Aspergian knows that. That’s why she named it The Aspergian.

With every pro-RPM, pro-Neurodiversity, feminist, intersectional article The Aspergian publishes, it gets left wing values all over Aspergers. If you google Aspergian now, all you will find are social justice articles.

And the AltAutism folks HATE IT.

But so do a lot of autistic advocates, for whom “Aspergers” conjures up a lot of trauma.

The founder has trauma from it too, though.

https://twitter.com/theaspergiancom/status/1185068296636375040?s=21

Image Description: screencap of a tweet from @TheAspergianCom reading

When I first told my closest living friend about being autistic, it was the first person I'd told other than my husband. This was her response:

Below is a screencap of a text conversation. The friend is talking about her autistic son saying “at this point I’ll be fucking happy if he ever calls me mom and stops trying to attack me.” Then she says “I think your autism is fucking bullshit.”

Image description: screencaps of more tweets reading:

Though she knew I was going to be tested, she'd continued to use the word Asperger's. I'd been helping her through the process of understanding her son and autism. I loved her deeply. I still do. But she blocked me on social media and told everyone before I was ready to come out.

So instantly all my social media was flooded with all these speculative and veiled comments I could only see portions of, and I was humiliated. I was a new mother struggling and lost my support system. She thought it was sinister I used the same label as her son. Minimizing.

Autism was my diagnosis. She didn't know that I was made to believe I was possessed by demons in my youth or all the hell I'd endured and all the struggles I had like being the last person in my school who learned to read six years late. She knew an articulate adult.

Image description: the next person I told, things went even worse. She outed me in local Facebook groups where I was the admin and parent groups. I had postpartum anxiety and severe breastfeeding aversion but my child wouldn't eat food. So it was BF constantly or a feeding tube. And no meds for me.

So I thought maybe the problem was me saying autism instead of Asperger's. My husband was aspie and always identified that way. I'd been a teacher with largely autistic classes for years. Those with that diagnosis were often intellectually disabled.

Image description: My best friend and one of my oldest and closest friends, both autistic, had committed suicide, and the two living best friends I had blew up my whole social circle. I was afraid to seek help, afraid to go in public, and brutally reframing my whole life and reliving traumas.

I needed help. I joined about 20-30 autistic groups and made the mistake of saying that I was aspie. I didn't want to be insulting and have another incident like what happened the first time I told someone. It didn't go well. I had no idea of the stigma at the time.

And I had no idea why I was being called a supremacist, shiny, a Nazi, ableist, etc. I argued against those claims because I'm definitely not those things. I thought I'd entered a den of extremists. I got booted. Then another group I entered started with, "Oh, there's the Nazi."

In that tweet thread, Terra goes on to say that it occurred to her that her best friend who had recently committed suicide might have sought out the autistic community before he died. And she went to look and found that he had posted and been dogpiled in the same manner. The day before he died.

Terra Vance is desperately anti supremacy. But she is also desperately anti bullying. And she felt that if people couldn’t say “I’m autistic” without losing loved ones and “I’m aspie” without being called a supremacist, then autistic people were being put in a very tight corner.

Especially since Aspergers is still an extant diagnosis pretty much everywhere but North America so people are getting shunned from the autistic community because of their DIAGNOSIS.

That’s why she named it The Aspergian.

And you know what?

The aspie supremacists HATE IT.

They hate that their dog whistle is now a popular and booming hub of Neurodiversity, anti-ABA, and intersectionality.

They hate that The Aspergian is republishing deleted Wikipedia articles of autistic nonspeakers, which the autistic dark web worked hard to get removed.

They hate that we promote FC and RPM and other AAC. They hate that we keep claiming that autism and Aspergers are the same thing.

They don’t want to share space with nonspeakers and black women. They’re a bunch of altright white incels and The Aspergian is getting autism and neurodiversity over their shiny high functioning boots.

Worst of all, we’re reaching PARENTS.

Our most popular articles are not aimed at fellow autistic people. They are aimed at NTs, parents, laymen, trying to educate them about autism.

My article on ABA went viral and made so many ABA therapists angry. It was beautiful.

Imagine description:

“And by some strange magic, we took off suddenly, going from like 100 views per month to over 100k, then 200k, then more and more. We heard a lot of stories that were not being heard. There are parents who read our site to learn about their children posthumously after suicide.

One mother told me that if she had found our site earlier, she would have known that her son's "aspie" diagnosis meant that he was fully autistic. She is filled with regrets. We hear from lots of people who had no idea that they were supposed to have these autistic struggles.

We hear from people in lots of non-white majority countries where autism acceptance and awareness is years/decades behind what a difference our site has made because they had no idea. They weren't reading other blogs and now they are. Now they are understanding autism.”

Understanding autism from a neurodivergent, autism-acceptance, Autism-Speaks-Is-Bad, anti-ABA, pro-AAC website.

The ADW HATE that.

So what do they do?

They stir up shit about the name. The autistic dark web have a bunch of sock accounts which they use to deliberately stir up shit among the #ActuallyAutistic tag on twitter so they can screenshot stuff and repost it out of context to further discredit autistic people.

So they know the ND crowd resent Aspergers. So they deliberately stir up crap about The Aspergian’s name and everybody eats it up.

They also spread lies like that we are racist and don’t have any contributors of colour (they block the BIPOC contributors who argue against this lie).

Image Descriotion:

Tweet from Riah Person (a black autistic advocate) saying

“The .@theAspergianCom has writers

• with I/DD

• that are nonspeaking

• with research background

• that are deaf

• that are blind

• with physically limiting disabilities

• that are autistic BIPOC

• that are autistic LGBTQ+

• with no formal writing skills

The list goes on”

They claim that we plagiarize. But in fact each contributor owns their own content and is free to publish in other places and often they do.

But mostly they bitch about the name.

And I get it. I do. Aspergers brings up a lot of bad feelings and associations, especially since the anti-ND movement started pushing the “Asperger was a Nazi” stuff in order to discredit Steve Silberman’s book Neurotribes.

But we can’t make Asperger’s a slur. It’s still an existing diagnosis all around the world. Happily it IS being removed from the ICD 11 in 2022 but it’s going to take decades to change the assumptions around that word.

Terra wants “Aspergers” to become synonymous with autism. No difference. No barriers. No judgements. Not because she loves or even identifies with Aspergers. Her diagnosis is autistic and she calls herself autistic. But she doesn’t think autistic people should be bullied over a label. It smacks of exclusionism.

The founder of The Aspergian feels that no autistic person should be bullied to the point of death or near-death because of their diagnosis, or because they have been trained to say they have Aspergers so NTs won’t pull the whole “you don’t look autistic” crap.

The autistic community, of ALL communities, should be the most understanding of misunderstanding. We should be the most able to understand that people don’t always mean what it sounds like they mean.

“Aspergers” is not a slur. It is not a supremacist term. At worst it is an outdated functioning label. At best it is a synonym for autism.

And it won’t become a dog whistle. Because The Aspergian won’t allow it.

#actuallyautistic #autism #suicide #bullying #advocacy #aspie #aspergers

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sweetandsavageautistic · 5 years

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Okay, so I found an article. Thought you might be interested to see a somewhat live reaction to it.

Let’s start with the title:

Special Needs Children – A Sign from God

This is gonna be fan-fucking-tastic.

Well, I have lots I could post about today. But what is on my heart is my need to accept.

A need to accept my son's autism and what comes with it.

Yeah, autism should be accepted. We should be accepted as people. Not too bad so far.

But then this picture is just below it:

thanks i hate it.

Our son has Asperger's. That means that he has autism that is “high-functioning”.

Damn, she’s letting a kid smoke the good kush?

I have been reminded by mothers at autism support groups that I should be glad that my little one can talk. Yes, that is true and I need to be reminded of that. However, one thing that he does is talk. All the time. His mind, and hence his tongue, rarely ever shut off.

“Little one.” I dunno how old this kid is, so idk if I can say it’s condescension yet.

I will go into more of why I think this is so in a later post, but just suffice it to say that though I like conversation and interacting with my son, constant conversation and repetitive questions can be extremely tiresome.

He is awkward in public, though that has gotten better.

He has high anxiety. That comes and goes.

He has a problem with attention deficit. No official diagnosis there, but believe me, he has it. Whatever it is.

He has questions? WELL NO SHIT! HE’S A FUCKING KID. And later on you say he has attention deficits. So of course the questions can be repetitive.

He has life threatening food allergies, and extreme sensitivity to sugar. Probable issues with gluten. Sensory issues. He has phobias about things like fireworks and feathers.

Oh, but I love him.

Lady, fireworks can get pretty loud, so it’s not irrational for someone who is autistic and likely also has SPD, to be afraid of fireworks. Feathers is an interesting phobia, though, but probably reasonable for him.

He also has an amazing memory.

In 2009, he placed 3rd in a local Bible Bee competition and then in 2010 placed first locally and 27th nationally. He remembers the names of people we met years ago and while I am stumbling over their name, he reminds me.

I mean, yeah, I guess that’s pretty fucking cool for a kid to do. But that’s the thing. There are probably some allistic kids and even neurotypical kids out there with amazing memories as well.

He has such an innocent heart. Very rarely have I known him to try to do anything to hurt anyone.

He’s a kid. Kids are innocent. Why is that something so special?

He has stamina. Little things often shake his world, but he can weather “big things” like a real trooper. Like when he rode 50 miles in a Right To Life Bike-a-Thon — with a fever (we found out about the fever after he came home :-).)

Um, he’s not a “trooper.” That kid’s badass. Riding a bike for 50 miles with a fever would be an impressive feat for almost anyone to accomplish.

Ah, my son.

In any case, today has been a day of real frustration. A day of frustration at him and his idiosyncrasies, but moreso at myself. I was so impatient today.

He argued with me about not wanting to eat certain vegetables. And argued and argued and negotiated…on and on and on.

Uh.............

He had a near tantrum over being late to a hockey practice due to our car getting stuck in the driveway in a snowdrift. It took about 10 reminders for him to unload the silverware in the dishwasher and then it still wasn't done. I could go on but there really is no point.

Meltdown. The word you’re looking for is meltdown. not tantrum. There’s a fucking difference.

I was impatient because–well, because he wasn't doing things on my timetable. His disability gets in my way, takes my time and is an annoyance. And far too often I go against the command of the Bible and show my annoyance at once (Proverbs 12:16).

I need to remember the good and give thanks to the Lord. I need to accept.

“His disability gets in my way.” Well, your warrior parent “pity-me” bullshit gets in MY way, and possibly his as well, so call it even.

A number of years ago, a dear friend gave me a poem about accepting disability. We were on the cusp of getting our son diagnosed, though unwillingly. We just wanted to know what was going on so that we could deal with it better and have some real resources.

Okay, not TOO bad.

This friend had a 20-some year old daughter with autism at the time. She was in full-time Christian work in the US with her husband and I later found out that she was struggling with leukemia. I read a transcript of a conversation she had on a radio broadcast of Family Life during which she mentioned that her child had autism, searched for her on the internet and made a bold phone call.

She called me back and mentored me through the beginning stages of dealing with what we now had in our family; a child with autism.

She called, prayed and shared.

Then this past year, she died.

I had never met Kathy, but her death left a hole in my heart. She also left this poem, from The Clowns of God by Morris West, Hodder and Stoughton, 1981. I hope that it helps you, whatever your lot in life.

Still not too bad.

You Need a Sign

Treasure him…

You need a sign. What better one could I give than to make this little one whole and new? I could do it; but I will not. I am the Lord and not a conjuror.

I game this mite a gift I denied to all of you- eternal innocence. To you he looks imperfect, but to Me he is flawless, like the bud that dies unopened or the fledgling that falls from the nest to be devoured by the ants. He will never pervert or destroy the work of My Father's hands.

He is necessary to you. He will evoke the kindness that will keep you human. His infirmity will prompt you to gratitude for your own good fortune. More!

He will remind you every day that I Am who I Am, that My ways are not yours, and that the smallest dust mote whirled in darkest space does not fall out of My hand.

I have chosen you. You have not chosen me. This little one is my sign to you.

I really hope this poem is just about kids in general and not about just disabled kids.

Treasure him…

I don't know about you, but I sure needed this reminder today.

And that’s where the article ends. I’m gonna see if that poem is about disabled people.

So I found the poem on a blog of a mother with a daughter who has Edwards syndrome aka Trisomy18. This is the comment:

Cathy, Many years ago, I used to become frustrated. I did not understand why God would send a child here to earth with severe disabilities, shorten lifespans, and daily challanges. Then my special needs son came into my life with all the answers.

When God created human life, he did so in his image; loving, accepting, generous, kind and patient. Our children or God's wish for the human race. Uneffected by Satan's trials. They remain ever loving, patient and kind. They are not just a gift to those God entrust them to here on earth. I think they are also a gift he grants to himself. A reminder of what he wanted all along. His own likeness here on earth.

You honor God with the care and love you provide to Annabel. Even more remarkable is that you have rasied Tara to do the same. I love the three of you dearly. God Bless You.

With great admiration Edie

So with that, I think it’s safe to say that the poem IS about disabled people specifically.

fuck.

#nt bullshit #cw nt bullshit #cw religion #autism #autistic #actuallyautistic #actually autistic #sweet and savage autistic

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sweetandsavageautistic · 5 years

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