#conversations with past me
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A conversation with child me. Realising some coping strategies were around long before I noticed them.
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Must be a Sugondese joke.
#dungeon meshi#chilchuck tims#laios touden#senshi#Looks like I won't be able to post this on dungeon meshi thursday so instead I will have a fun past/future conversation#This is wednesday me who has not seen the episode yet but I have such a strong feeling that it is going to be extremely special.#*This* fight is what the first arc has been building up to and it has *so* many incredible moments.#We're going to see the chilchuck knife throw! The leg sacrifice! The bones!#Watch them ramp up the quality this episode and go wild with the frantic action of 'oh god our plan is going to shit'.#Hello. Me of the future who just watched the episode.#I knew it was going to be good but that...that blew my mind completely. My high expectations were beyond met. My god.#I'm just speechless at how well they handled everything. The leg. The tension. That ENDING.#If you have not already: PLEASE watch Dungeon Meshi.
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Compliments:
Lucifer: That's it! Mammon, I'm revoking your MC privileges!!
Mammon: 😨
MC: 😨
Mammon: H-hey Lucifer, hold on-! Big bro, let's be reasonable!
MC: Yeah, Lucifer, let's talk about it!! What about my Mammon privileges? What did I do??
Lucifer: *scrunches his face* You consider Mammon a privilege...?
MC: Yes, of course! Mammon's my man! My GOAT! My bro! My buttermilk cheese biscuit!! You can't just take him!!
Mammon: 😳
Mammon: ☺️ D'aww, MC ya don't gotta-
Mammon: -what was that last one??
Beel: *sniff*
Beel: The most beautiful compliment I've ever heard... 🤧
#conversations i've had in the past#obey me#obey me shall we date#shall-we-date-obey-me#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me beelzebub#obey me incorrect quotes#obey me scenarios#obey me nightbringer#shameless mammon propaganda
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Pac: Take care of Ramon, take care of Richas, ok? See you on the other side, big boy.
Fit: [Laughs] Take it easy, big boy. Take it easy, big boy. Actually, nononono– You can't just say "big boy" and then just expect me to not drag you outta here. [Fit tries to lasso Pac] You're coming with me.
Pac: No, I need to leave!
Fit: You're coming with me. You are not dying today! You are not dying today!
Pac: I need to leave, Fit! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
Ironmouse: Are you guys like, having sexy time?
Fit: There's homosexual activity going on Mouse, don't worry about us, ok?
Ironmouse: You guys, we don't have time to be gay right now.
[ Full Transcript ↓ ]
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Pac: I'm just here to say goodbye to you, Fit.
Fit: Goodbye? We're not– we're gonna be fine, we're going to get out of here, don't worry.
Aypierre: Yeah, don't worry!
Pac: I know, but like– I will sleep until the end, you know? I will pass through this moment sleeping, man. I won't be able to be awake for the moment.
Fit: [Laughs] You know, it's– I mean, if that's how you wanna go, but– I mean, that- I mean, isn't that bed kind of like.... I don't know, it's–
Pac: No no, I will be staying on the sofa, you know, I will be staying on the sofa.
Fit: Oh the sofa. Ok, that's a nice sofa! Yeah, that is a pretty nice sofa.
Pac: Yeah, it's a nice sofa right? No, yeah– I'm going to stay on the sofa, you know? So, since I will be going Fit... [Pac starts tossing Fit all his items]
Aypierre: [Not paying attention to their conversation] Is that bigger cell? I don't think it's a bigger- biggest one.
Fit: Oh... Thank you Pac, thank you.
Pac: Everything you need to survive, ok?
Fit: Wow.
Aypierre: Wow.
Pac: And if you need this one also, maybe, who knows? [Throws him more items]
Fit: Ohhh, well hey– just take this to remember me by, ok? [Tosses him a photo of himself – the same one Aypierre was carrying all day yesterday]
Pac: [Laughs] Ok, I will sleep holding the picture you know, like this. You know, I will dream about you, Fit. And I hope this is gonna be good dreams. I see you in the other side. Good luck, my friend.
Fit: The other side... Yeah, you know, yeah, we– we– you know? It's been an honor, Pac. It's been an honor, you know?
Pac: Yeah, for me too, you know? Take care of Ramon, take care of Richas, ok?
Fit: Ok.
Pac: See you on the other side, big boy.
Fit: I will sing your praise– Oh yeah, hey– [Laughs] Take it easy, big boy. Take it easy, big boy. Actually, nononono– You can't just say "big boy" and then just expect me to not drag you outta here. You're coming with me.
Pac: No, I need to leave!
Fit: You're coming with me. You are not dying today! You are not dying today!
Pac: I need to leave, Fit! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
Fit: Sorry, there's–
Pac: I'm sorry!
Ironmouse: Are you guys like, having sexy time?
Fit: There's homosexual activity going on Mouse, don't worry about us, ok?
Ironmouse: You guys, you guys– we don't have time to be gay right now, come on. There's no time.
Pac: No, there's no time! Oh, goodbye Fit...
Fit: Ok, c'mon, no no no, come on, we got this we got this!
Pac: Goodbye Fit, I'm sorry!
Fit: [Laughs] Oh no...
#Pactw#FitMC#Hideduo#FitPac#QSMP#QSMP Prison#January 22 2024#So canonically how do you guys view this moment?#Did Pac just canonically conk out from stress?#Did he take sleeping pills on purpose to sleep through whatever awful thing was inevitably going to happen?#Curious to hear what other people think#I like to imagine the stress finally got to him#He spent the entire time trying to mirror things he saw Cell doing#and finally cried about it to Bagi#I can't blame him if he wants to sleep through the rest of it. Man's living in a place that's actively making him relive past trauma#Fit says he's carrying Pac in his backpack but I like to imagine that he just gave Pac a piggy back ride the entire way home :D#I imagined that for Purgatory too#it's cute#idk the whole idea of very traumatized characters being so comfortable around certain people#Idk the idea Pac feeling so safe around Fit#(despite being in a place that is actively stressing him out)#that he feels alright falling asleep and trusting him / Mike to protect him is sweet to me#Idk man I'm a big fan of the ''literal sleeping together'' trope#I love when characters take naps together it's so cute#esp when it's two traumatized characters with a lot of baggage / trust issues#It's nice#anyways I got way off topic with these tags LMAO sorry#I was gonna edit this down but I like the entire conversation so I'm leaving it as is#The YouTube editor living in my brain: Not great for viewer retension#Me: Shhhhhhhh I'm an Archivist. I can do whatever I want.
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actually okay. see i fundamentally don't understand gatekeeping. listen if i like or am excited about something i try to convince THE MAXIMAL AMOUNT OF PEOPLE POSSIBLE to be into it with me. when i think something is cool i come barreling into the world like "HEY HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THE COOL THING LET ME TALK TO YOU ABOUT COOL THING" and then if anyone so much as slightly suggests 'how do i get into the cool thing' i go "OH BOY WOULD YOU LIKE A PAMPHLET ON THE SUBJECT BECAUSE I CAN WRITE ONE FOR YOU RIGHT NOW." if anything i'm off-puttingly enthusiastic about getting people involved. overly helpful. concerningly so. how do people like, gatekeep their interests. i don't think i'm physically capable of it. i'd explode.
#you breathe the words 'hey how do i--' near me and i have already shoved three multi-paragraph answers in your face#'HERE YOU GO DO YOU WANT TO JOIN? LET'S DO THIS TOGETHER!'#and i barrel past all other attempts at conversation in the meantime (i try not to i'm just a LITTLE autistic)
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Lets play a game. Truth or Scared.
#station 19#station19edit#carina x maya#carina deluca#maya bishop#mine#they really had all of their fears come true to some degree 🙃#i just wish they had more time and chose to focus more on some of these#instead of just wordless montages/lack of convos#but really hoping the pay off is as good as the cliffhanger was for this past episode#we need to see carina freaking out over maya in danger and the pregnancy conversation#bonus if carina actually has to try and save maya's life herself if she later on collapses or something#and both of them just so relieved to be back in each others arms after being so worried the whole time...give me all of it!
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fake ep idea + doodles
#i was thinking abt how funny it would be if there was a shiftythrifting blog equivalent in lmk. and half the stuff on there is#submitted by wukong. so i thought a yard sale ep would be funny lol#basically the hoard becomes problem one way or another and wukong figures the best way to get rid of his junk is thru ebay#somehow ends up selling world ending artifacts to random megapolis citizens so mk mei and redson have to scramble to find em#purposely meant to mirror the weekly shenanigans s1-2 style eps that are really goofy (dumpling ep noodles ep etc)#but it gets darker and darker because MK is not fucking ok after that whole thing with the scroll and some unchecked identity crisis#for me id want him to kind of. freak tf out because they have to find MULTIPLE chaos inducing items that could end the world while trying t#be sillygoofy and funny about it. so hes trying to mask his panic with “ohhh guys its just like the good ol days ^_^ remember that ^_^”#ESPECIALLY after that whole thing with the ink scroll. also mei doesnt buy any of it and is worried for him the whole time#as for the B plot it could be monkey king also trying to be very relaxed abt selling 4000 years worth of stuff and tang getting all huffy#like “these are priceless artifacts that could help us learn so much about the past!! wtf man!!!”#and maybe it reveals smth like wukong not wanting to hold on anymore bc his past weighs him down. and theyre all reminders#i think azure mentioned that wukong is sentimental (idk if that was genuine or lying to mk) so that could be touched on to#so basically. the theme would be some sort of conversation abt nostalgia. i think. im not a writer so its very fuzzy in my head#if anyone wants to add on or include their own spin on it feel free. also included undercut redson as a treat somewhere in there#myart#lego monkie kid#monkie kid#lmk red son#lmk mei#lmk MK#lmk xiaotian#lmk xiaojiao#lmk sun wukong#lmk swk#doodles#lmk tang#lmk pigsy#lmk traffic light trio#yard sale ep
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The thing about the argument that the sword makes Laudna uncomfortable is that it's valid if it does, but if you've been in any sort of organization that attempts to have an emotionally open dialogue in making decisions, and especially if you've been in any sort of leadership position within it, you will almost certainly encounter people who suddenly become uncomfortable when, as the meme goes, we are not about them. You encounter people who suddenly express discomfort - which should ideally be brought up early in the conversation since that alone may be a reason to blackball a decision - when multiple other arguments haven't worked (and during the ensuing argument this episode, you can easily watch Orym stick to the same exact story he's been saying for 50+ episodes and that he wants to reclaim this sword and use it to kill Ludinus while Laudna throws out multiple arguments, switching from one to the other as the rest of the party slowly realizes the sword isn't cursed and that this is Delilah's influence). You see this in internet spaces as well; people who do not draw a line between "trigger" and "squick" or "discomfort" and "dislike" even though that line very much exists.
Obviously you do have to still listen, because there are plenty of valid reasons to change a decision because someone involved is uncomfortable; but even a legitimately uncomfortable person does not automatically outweigh the needs of everyone else and you cannot please everyone at once. These decisions must be made contextually because otherwise "I'm uncomfortable with this" becomes a magic Uno Reverse card to hold the group decisions hostage. It's a factor, but ultimately, even if Delilah were in no way involved, if Laudna's the only person uncomfortable and this also means a lot to Orym, the solution is likely going to be either "keep it out of sight" or "give it to a member of the Accord". And yeah, as Imogen points out, if Laudna's genuinely uncomfortable with Orym having a sword with a dark history, absorbing it herself really undercuts that point.
#i think the issue with the abuse narrative is that like. yes you should be a haven for a friend with an abuser#but if the abuser is causing your friend to attack you in your sleep and steal your shit then the conversation changes drastically#i feel those demanding laudna's (delilah's) needs be prioritized forget there are 6 other people in the room#who just realized that if they find an item Delilah likes in Aeor Laudna might do this again#cr spoilers#cr discourse#it is really something also where people are like ORYM SHUTS DOWN EVERY CONVERSATION WITH HIS PAST TRAUMA#turn around and be like LAUDNA SHOULD SHUT DOWN THIS CONVERSATION USING HER PAST TRAUMA like ok kipperlily.#(i'm going to start calling this type of fan kipperlily. it's funny to me. we'll see how long it lasts.)
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This is purely speculation on my end, but I've noticed that it seems like people (specifically younger queer people, partially under forty) are so used to queerphobes indignantly saying, "you have the right to marry, what more can you want?! Why do you shove it down our throats?!" that they internalize the idea that gay marriage and other rights were only fought for for queer assimilation.
The push for things like gay marriage wasn't just "to assimilate," and especially after the AIDs crisis, you very well could watch your lover or friend or mentor die in front of you and have no recourse. No protections. No guarantee that you could even say goodbye. Learning that - as a young queer myself - hammered home how important these things can be. To get where we are now didn't happen because of the magical benevolence of the cishets. We fought for that shit. We died for that shit.
Again, this is speculation, but I don't think young queers (even me) will truly understand the scope of queer history. It takes effort to learn about this, but it is an effort worth pursuing every single time. At the least, we owe it to honour the people who came before us who have sacrificed so much. We owe our communities that much, at least.
#queer#lgbt#lgbtq#politics#it just irks me to see the 'why werent queers of the past trying to move to reprioritize marriage 🙄'#it gives off the same vibes as 'why transition? shouldn't you abolish gender altogether🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄. hashtag owned!'#it's just...please learn about history. even the aids crisis ALONE was harrowing to learn - but it's so important#i don't see assimilation as what you do per se but rather what you believe in#queer assimilation isn't getting married and having kids - it's (to me) an attitude of queerness#it's devaluing queerness and thinking of it as lesser - so you will distance yourself intrinsically from it#maybe that's the same to some people but i don't see it that way#and even then the conversion of this alone is nuanced and complicated#instead of blaming an individual i tend to blame the systems in place that lead people to devaluing themselves and who they are
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Conversation's with me as a child. I've traded the little smocked dresses for spikes, patches and spite.
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I've said it before, and I'm gonna say it again: I love OFMD and the OFMD fandom.
There's so much awesome art and thoughtful meta on my dash! The cosplays are magnificent! There's more well-written fanfic than I could ever possibly read! You maniacs make beautiful gifs -- and you're so quick about it! The tags on every post are gold, there's always someone ready to add alt text to images, and I've never seen so much fundraising and charity in a fandom!
The fandom isn't perfect -- no fandom is -- but there's a lot of love and kindness and supportiveness here that I haven't encountered anywhere else.
Thank you for being here. <3
#ofmd#ofmd positivity#i'm just feeling it guys#this is the first fandom i've ever been active in#in the past i've just lurked and reblogged#with this fandom? i feel like i have a little community of gay pirate friends#i'm too much of an anxious mess to initiate one-on-one conversations but i still feel like i have friends here#(and everyone who has dm'd me has been so lovely)#anyway hi hello i'm glad you're here
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One thing that I love about the bar conversation scene and Bea's "I did not say that!" about being royalty is that it implies that by that point Ava and Beatrice have already had a more detailed conversation about Bea's uppriggning. Not only that, but that it was such a lighthearted conversation so that Ava can freely mention it during a moment when they are both having fun and not worry about Bea's mood changing.
No heavy feelings, no fear of breaking the joy bubble. Just another anecdote to laugh about.
#I can imagine Ava making all kind of jokes to make the conversation a little lighter for Bea#partially - the other part is just because she's Ava haha#and Bea joining her because her past might be hard - but sharing it with Ava is easy#and I also love that the whole 'you said it [you are royalty]' more likely comes from a misunderstanding#and that makes me curious about what Bea could've said that lead to that#ava silva#warrior nun#sister beatrice
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Asmo: Ugh! MC, you dating Levi has such "I can fix him" energy!
MC: What?? Bitch, I got all his same issues and I can't even fix myself!!
MC: At this point, I only hope we can put our similarly broken pieces together and just vibe like that. There's not enough glue in the galaxy to make either of us functional again! There's only broken glass and Halo here.
#conversations i've had in the past#obey me#obey me shall we date#shall-we-date-obey-me#obey me leviathan#obey me asmo#obey me levi#obey me asmodeus#obey me incorrect quotes
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Collection of edits from this comic with Disco Elysium dialogue.
#What do I even tag this#mdzs#mdzs disco elysium au#There are so many line that work very well for them. Alas I was constrained by the panels I had.#So many hbd and kim conversations fit the wangxian dynamic its unreal.#Once again I am politely holding out Disco Elysium as a recommendation: So long as you are aware of it's content and warnings.#It is truly one of the most hopeful games about trauma and despair. It is hilarious in a way that frames the tragedy perfectly.#Be warned that it is a dark and heavy read. But it is truly a life changing experience.#It helped my get out of a bad place in realizing how much I was hurting myself by trying to hold onto the past and regrets.#Go in as blind as you can. If you are ready for it - you will not regret playing this game.#In other news...yeah okay so I meant to spend the rest of my saturday drawing more pd-mdzs#Then I started watching Link Click.... oops where did the time go?#Permit me another day of stalling and I will have comics coming soon. Might sprinkle some LC doodles in the mix too.
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"mama, i want you to leave him." "imogen, there are children here that rely on me." imagine saying that to your own daughter desperately reaching out to you i'm going crazy going stupid
#i don't have words for this conversation i'm too sleepy it's past my bedtime dkfjskdfjskd#i have to finish this convo and then go to bed but i know there will be an imodna convo waiting for me :D :D :D#2h24m c3e89#text#critical role#cr3#cr lb#cr spoilers#imogen temult#liliana temult
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I’m not usually one for conditioned whumpees, and especially not for recovery, but I think I would really enjoy those types of scenes more if the trauma responses were allowed to be more nuanced and complex.
This isn’t a criticism of anyone specific, it’s just something I think I lack in the community, and I don’t think I’m the one to write it either, but I think that what puts me off is that I know what it’s like to be triggered by something, and it’s such a complicated and not always conscious process.
Like yes they might feel that someone they’re with is angry or upset with them and suddenly try to do anything they can to please them, but that might come with a wave of shame and self loathing once they’ve realised that nothing was wrong and they’ve just embarrassed themselves in front of someone close to them.
Or maybe they’re scared of that part of themself, and they’re so scared that other people will see it or hurt them again that they push them away, maybe they test their boundaries, maybe they hurt the people they love instead because they want to see what happens when they finally do get angry.
Maybe they hate that part of them that makes them become someone else, that makes them get lost in their mind. Maybe they resent how it makes relationships hard, how they try to move on but some small thing ignites a carefully buried spark of fear and the whole thing starts again.
I also wish there wasn’t so much of a power dynamic of whumpee and caretaker, where the whumpee is someone who is mentally ill and traumatised and not expected to ever be independent or live alone. No, I want them to have friends and partners and lovers, and struggle and find joy in equal measure, on their own terms.
There’s absolutely people writing this sort of content, and there are things I will read because I think they capture that complexity, and of course these are my personal feelings but I do urge people to think about this when they write, if they want to.
#whump meta#obviously you can write whatever and I am not in charge of anything#it’s just something I personally would like to see more of in the community#and I think having that would help me to engage with more of the content I see actually#i can’t demand it of anyone but I wanted to put my thoughts out thre#and also see if people feel the same#i know some do because this was sparked by a conversation with a friend#s talks#past trauma
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