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ttttaehyungie · 4 years

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sincerely, but no longer yours | chapter 4

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sincerely, but no longer yours | ex!kim namjoon x reader

genre | angst, exes au

summary | It started as a coping mechanism as getting the words out provided a form of catharsis. But now you can’t stop writing these love letters, even with the knowledge that they’ll never get sent. After all, who writes love letters to their ex?

word count | 4.2k

chapter rating | PG-13

warnings | none

a/n | IM SO SORRY this is late 😔😔 skldjflkj i was trying to get this out for namjoon’s bday butttt i failed HAHAH sighz life just threw consecutive curveballs my way ok but here we go!!!! part foouuuurrrr

If you thought things between you and Namjoon would be awkward, well, they were. Undeniably and unbearably awkward. The silence stretched long between you without Hoseok to fill the space. Maybe you should have reserved some topics of idle chatter instead of expending them all during last night’s dinner. Maybe you should have asked Namjoon to come over after Hoseok’s dance class. Maybe you shouldn’t have asked him to hang out at all.

Wistful regretting will get you nowhere. You know that. But you indulge in it all the same, stirring your straw and watching the ice cubes in your latte swirl and clink against the sides of the glass. Pointedly keeping your eyes trained on your half-full cup and off the man seated at your shared table in the cafe, his fingers thrumming nervously on said table, you feel a twinge of guilt. How long will you let this silence drag on?

It’s not for the lack of trying. You’re trying. You really are. And you know that Namjoon is too. Small talk just seems to evade you. And deeper issues are off the table, for now at least. Not until you’re sure that he’s not going to abruptly drop out of your life again. Although you’ve agreed to give him a second chance at friendship, the emotional shields were still difficult to lower.

Flicking your eyes to your watch for the thousandth time that afternoon, the unease only gnaws at you further when you realize that the minute hand has scarcely ticked forward by two minutes. Forty more minutes to go. It feels like it’ll be a lifetime before Hoseok is done.

As Hoseok’s weekend trip came to an end, you wondered if the hangouts with Namjoon would experience a similar fate.

But then again, it’s not Hoseok whose friendship he was looking to rebuild. That had never ended. It was just yours. So should you really have been surprised when he invited you out for lunch midweek when Hoseok was miles away back home and away from the city?

You had to give him credit. When he said that he would do anything he could to attempt to make reconciliation happen, the guy had really meant it.

The first couple of lunches together - lunches that you dragged yourself to because you had agreed to give him a second chance - were a total cringefest.

Namjoon was the one who pushed through it with unwavering perseverance. And that was what spurred you to continue trying.

It’s not like you don’t enjoy his company. You do. It’s hard not to, really. Not when his dimpled smile and rounded pleading eyes are as disarming as they are. Namjoon has always been a good listener, always making you feel valued for your ideas no matter the frivolity, but lately he’s picked up this habit of bending down to your height, tipping his chin down just so so he can peer up at you with the most puppy dog look ever and you just- you can’t handle it.

It’s devastating. It’s irresistible. It’s a bulldozer through all the walls you’ve put up over the years, smashing them to rubble in a matter of weeks.

And so the lunches you used to drag yourself to became lunches to be anticipated. The text conversations that began in stiff formality soon gave way to a barrage of emojis and typos left uncorrected, and you find your walls gradually giving way too. The two of you had always shared an easy chemistry, something that hasn’t faded with the years and unaffected by the breakup.

The breakup was the one thing that still remained taboo.

Well if he hadn’t wanted to speak about it in the time leading up to your breakup back then, why would he want to talk about it now?

You know you’ve chosen to forgive him. But the residual bitterness still sits much like the dredges at the bottom of your daily morning cup of coffee. Unprovoked, it would be fine. It lies dormant so long as nothing shakes it up.

And you’re not going to shake it up. Because you’re over Namjoon.

“Ke- ketchup?!” Namjoon sputters, jaw dropped and eyes wide. “I know it’s been five years, but damn…”

“What?” Your tone is defensive, but your facial expression is irrefutably sheepish as you drag a fry through the offensive red condiment you’d just squeezed onto your plate.

“What ever happened to the vendetta against ketchup?” he asks, still gaping at sight of you consuming the very thing you’d once condemned as unworthy of being ingested.

You shrug and answer simply, “Lots of things can change in five years.”

It was just meant to be a passing comment, nothing more. But Namjoon seems to take in the sight of you afresh, then nods emphatically.

“That, it can.”

The noise that escapes you is tiny, hopefully indiscernible, as he places an elbow on the table, suddenly leaning forward with his chin in hand, hovering over his half-eaten club sandwich. Determinedly refraining from shifting a little in your seat under his scrutinizing gaze, the words of protest sit heavy on your tongue as you keep a tight grip on them much in the same stubborn manner. You will not break. You’re over him.

“You’ve changed,” he says, gaze still roving over you. It’s not an accusation in the slightest, but more of an observation. “And it’s not just the ketchup.”

“Thank god. If the only character growth I’ve made in the past five years is learning to consume ketchup, then that’d be a real problem.”

He laughs - the staccato hah odd but familiar - and reclines back, elbow propped casually against the back of the chair now.

“But for real,” he says, gesturing with his sandwich-filled hand, the crumbs go flying all over the table. He takes a pause as he stuffs the entirety of it in his mouth, his cheeks bulging with the too-big-mouthful. It’s amazing how he doesn’t choke, but he manages, gulping it down so he can continue. “It’s like you’re more comfortable in your own skin now somehow.”

“Hm,” you ponder between your own bites of your burger, “what do you mean by that?”

“You just seem more sure of who you are lately.”

You purse your lips at that. After the breakup, you finally stopped chasing Joon’s shadow and embarked on your own journey of self-discovery. But you can’t tell him that.

“Maybe,” you offer instead. “I could say the same about you. About having changed, I mean.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” you emphasize, jabbing towards him with a fry. “It feels like -” same fry still in hand, you tap it against your lip as you think through your words, then point it at him again as it comes to you - “like you’re finally letting the words out. You’ve always had this really deep inner world - god knows how many times I’ve lost you mid-conversation to your daydreaming - but now you actually verbalize it.”

The poor fry that’s been waved all around as you gesticulated your thoughts finally gets popped into your mouth. “And it’s nice. It’s nice having a peek into the landscapes of your mind.”

“Maybe it comes with publishing,” he jokes, but his eyes shine with unsaid appreciation at your words.

Your heartbeat stutters a little at the sight of it, but you ignore it. Because you’re over him.

You’re over him. You’re over him, you’re over him, you’re over him.

That’s what you remind yourself, smacking your cheeks as if the sting of it would resonate the words into your stupid brain and make. it. stick.

Sighing out to yourself in the bathroom, you ready yourself to return to the living room. To return to Namjoon.

Yes, it’s pathetic, but you’re hiding in the bathroom away from Namjoon.

Steeling your nerves, you twist the lock and pad your way trepidly back to the sofa where Namjoon sits.

Feigning normalcy, you take a seat next to him and tap away at your phone for a distraction.

Underneath you, the cushions shift and jostle you lightly with the shift in Namjoon’s weight as he scoots closer to you. His warmth bleeds into you where his thigh presses against yours. At least he’s got his pants back on.

“____.”

You look up at him.

“Are you really ok?” His eyes are full of emotion - concern, repentance, sincerity - as they search yours.

“It’s fine, Joon.”

It’s not.

Maybe you were being too naive when you thought you could just be friends. That whatever existed between you two before all this would never get in the way. That the same memories that plague you don’t similarly affect Namjoon.

It had all been going well before this came in like a bucket of cold water dousing you in shock from head to toe.

Namjoon sat in your bed, blankets pooled around his waist to conceal his bottom half. His pantsless bottom half. Not that it took particular prominence in your mind, you dismiss, as you focus on pulling the thread through.

It seems Namjoon’s reputation as the god of destruction lives on. And neither his pants nor his ego are safe from it. What began as an afternoon of dorky fun, attempting to reproduce Hoseok’s latest choreography video (and poorly), peaked into hilarity when Namjoon’s pants spontaneously decided they would have no more of what can barely be termed as dancing. With a sharp ripping noise, his pants seam tore straight down the middle.

The way his eyes shot wide, his hands flying to shield his crotch, had you doubling over in laughter till your sides hurt and you had to gasp to catch your breath between peals of laughter. He whined for you to stop, but it only made it all that much funnier.

The occasional giggle still escaped you, but eventually you calmed down enough to offer to patch it up for him, brandishing the sewing kit you retrieved from the depths of your closet.

And that’s how he ended up hiding under the covers while you mended the rip in his berms.

A chuckle - this time not your own - breaks your concentration.

“What’s so funny?” you ask.

“No, it’s nothing.”

“Hey.” You elbow him lightly. “Share the joke.”

He bites his lip as he considers it for a second. Prodding him once more, it makes him relent.

“I mean, I imagined being undressed in your bed again, but I definitely didn’t think it would be like this.”

Oh.

It registers somewhere in the back of your mind that it is pretty funny. But your laugh sounds hollow, even in your ears. Dropping your gaze back to your stitching, to the sewing that you’ve completed, but you repeat the stitch on the same spot a couple more times. It’s unnecessary, but it’s all you have to hold on to right now in the midst of your shock.

But you can only do this for so long before it reveals itself for the irrationality it is. Knotting it up and snipping the thread hastily, you pass the article of clothing back to Namjoon as you rise from where you were perched on the edge of the bed, the action taking him by surprise.

“Here, I’ll give you some privacy to put them back on. I need to use the bathroom anyway.”

You’re speeding off before he can get a single word in.

“____,” the sound of your name pulls you out of your thoughts. His hand is warm where it grasps your arm, shaking you gently. He’s doing his head ducking thing again, stooped to your level so his eyes can bore straight into yours. “I crossed a line, didn’t I?”

“No, no.” You shake your head, and you fake a smile as you huff out an exhale. “It was a good joke, Joon.”

“But it made you uncomfortable.” His eyes never leave yours. “I made you uncomfortable.”

You don’t answer. What were you supposed to say?

“I’m really sorry, ____. I shouldn’t have said that.”

“It’s fine, Joon. It’s fine.”

It’s not. It’s really not.

But it has to be. Because you’re over him.

It’d occurred to you once that the fates had a sense of humor, and now you’re quickly realizing that tormenting you is their favorite brand of humor.

It should be great that Namjoon blended into your friend group with little to no problem.

Ever since the first time you invited him over for lunch in the museum’s cafe - something that was meant to be a one-off, a compromise so you wouldn’t have to cancel your lunch appointment with Namjoon while also accommodating the deluge of urgent work that had cropped up without warning - his visits, both to the museum and its cafe, had become much more frequent. When asked about it, he’d explained that the artwork in the galleries became a great source of inspiration for his own work.

But you know the real reason. He’s lonely.

The city may be bustling with people, but it’s still a lonely place. At least with your job, you have regular coworkers you meet every day and have formed friendships with. But for Namjoon, being a novelist may grant him the luxury of flexibility in his work environment, but it also denies him the company of regular coworkers. His ready availability, no matter whether it was for morning coffee runs or lunch appointments or after-work dinner or drinks, made it easy to piece together that his way of life before this was quite a solitary one.

So it should fill you with selfless joy that your close friends have taken to him well.

In reality, a selfish jealousy simmers in the pit of your gut.

Watching as Yeri feeds Namjoon a piece of cupcake, your stomach turns at the blatant attempts at flirting. Unable to stand the sight, your gaze drops swiftly to the cupcake in your own hand. Chomping into it, you grind your teeth with a force that’s entirely unnecessary for such a moist cupcake.

You have no right to be upset with Yeri. Honestly, she’d done her due diligence. You’re the one to blame.

Having recognized Namjoon from the lecture, and noticing the number of times he’d walked you to work after your occasional morning coffee run, it wasn’t long before Yeri marched you to the pantry, arm hooked in yours. She steered you away from prying ears and towards where Soo-eun sat, waiting.

Yeri plucks the coffee cup out of your hand, ignoring your sputtered protests, and places it firmly on the counter with a solid thud, hot liquid sloshing about in the cup and rendering the poor barista’s efforts at latte art a complete waste.

“I’m sick of waiting for you to spill to us about your boyfriend, ____, so I’m taking things into my own hands! It’s been weeks. We need the juicy details!”

Soo-eun, who had been brewing her own cup of tea, nodded as she stuck her tea bag into her mug. “I have to admit, I’ve been waiting too.”

“Guys,” you say, waving your hand in dismissal. “It’s not like that. He’s just a really old friend.”

Well. It’s half true. They don’t need the messy details, you decide, as you recount how you met Namjoon all those years ago. It doesn’t matter anyway. You’re over him.

“Nooo,” Yeri whines, throwing her hands up in exasperation, “I thought something juicy was finally happening in your life, ____.”

Oh, if only she knew.

Jealousy bubbles up like an emotional acid reflux that you desperately try to keep down. With every flirtatious touch, you have to remind yourself that you’d never explicitly communicated that Namjoon was off-limits. Because he’s not.

You can’t lay a claim on him because he’s not yours. Not anymore.

But as you grapple with the jealousy that threatens to boil over, you’re forced to wonder - maybe you’re not that over him.

You put a finger to your lips, shushing your friends, then beckon them forward. Shooting them a thumbs-up, they return ones of their own.

Your knocks rap sharply on the wooden door. Heavy footsteps approach the door and the three of you ready yourselves.

The door cracks open and Namjoon peeks out, messy-haired and shirt all rumpled.

“____, wha-”

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!” your trio hollers more than sings.

As the song - if the cacophony can even be called that - carries on without care for neither the time (midnight) nor the neighbors (probably highly annoyed), Yeri shoves the cake into Namjoon’s unsuspecting hands, clearly unaware of his klutzy nature, and the cake very nearly ends up in a heap of strawberries and cream on the ground. But your hand shoots out to catch it, rebalancing the weight of it quickly, well-practiced after the years of growing up around Namjoon. The reflex action doesn’t go unnoticed by him and his lips quirk upwards as Soo-eun snaps a party hat - glittery and obnoxious just like the ones donning each one of your own heads - to Namjoon's head, hiding his bed hair.

"... happy birthday to yoooouuuu," the song drags out into a dissonant finale.

Namjoon's smile has always been captivating, but it's even more so with his features illuminated by the soft orange glow of the candlelight. The tenderness so evident in his eyes pulls you in, irresistible and unrelenting. And though the urge to avert your gaze usually plagues you inanely, it seems to have been entirely overrode by this strange new fixation on the sight of his dewy-eyed expression.

“Thank you so much,” he says, and the sincerity in his words isn’t diminished even with the way he half-whispers it out.

Quiet affection settles like a gentle hum in your heart. Before this, the exhaustion from the day had been eating at you, your eyes strained and dry from the unforgiving glare of your screen at work, your bones heavy with lethargy and craving nothing more than the plush welcoming hug of your mattress. But now, seeing him alight in jubilation, it’s enough that you feel the tiredness recede.

“But please.” He hurriedly jabs a thumb back to his apartment twice. “My neighbors’ hate for me is probably increasing at an exponential rate the longer we stand here.”

“Screw them!” Yeri whispers sharply, the irony of it lost on her. “Blow out your candles first, Joonie.”

Joonie.

Just a single word, but it yanks you right out of the pleasantry you’d been floating along in. Jealousy pulls you under, suddenly irrationally possessive over the simple nickname as you drown in the ebbing waves of the nasty emotion.

Turning back to Namjoon, you plaster on a polite smile. “Yeah, make a wish first.”

Looking between the three of you, it registers that none of you are going to be making any moves to enter his place until he submits to your bidding. Better to just you guys what you want. Relenting, the candles get extinguished in two puffs, and your cheers - hushed this time - fill the hallway.

“Alright!” Yeri claps her hands together, breaking out of a whisper with her exclamation. “Time to check out Namjoon’s abode!”

In typical devil-may-care Yeri fashion, she pushes past Namjoon and walks freely into the place, making herself comfortable. Used to her antics by now, Soo-eun laughs a little, but follows her lead, grabbing the cake from Namjoon on her way in.

“I’ll get this sliced.”

Your eyes trail after Soo-eun as she enters the apartment. When you turn back to Namjoon, you find him looking at you. There it is again, that look. It’s a look that you don’t want - don’t dare - to decipher, but it’s a look that seems to linger whenever he thinks you won’t notice.

You’ve noticed it for weeks now.

In feigned nonchalance, you brush past Namjoon to make a beeline for his couch. After the number of times you’ve hung out at each other’s places, Namjoon’s apartment is like a second home to you now.

“How’d you know I’d be home?” His voice is echoey where it carries over from the doorway as you plop yourself into the leather seat, letting your body get swallowed up in comfort. The front door clicks shut and Namjoon joins you in the living room soon after.

“Face it, Joonie,” Yeri calls from where she’s inspecting his bookshelf. “We’re your only friends in this city.”

“Ouch.” He runs a hand through his hair. “But touche.”

Slices of cake get distributed, courtesy of Soo-eun, and the couch gets crowded as all four of you squeeze onto the tiny thing that was definitely meant to seat two. But there’s no complaints. Not when there’s cake.

Squished between Namjoon and Soo-eun, your bodies pressed up side by side, you’re not sure if you’re imagining it when you feel Namjoon stiffen up momentarily, then hesitantly relax and lean into you. The feel of him is indulgently familiar, and you wonder if it’s the same for him.

The room settles into a contented quiet for a while. Clearly, consuming the dessert takes priority over conversation.

It’s Soo-eun who starts up the conversation again. “Didn’t you go to college here, Namjoon?” she asks. “Did you not keep in contact with anyone?”

You watch carefully as Namjoon fiddles with his fork as he clears his throat. “How do I put this?” he begins, the silver of the fork gleaming distractingly with the way it catches the light under his fidgeting. “I guess, I, um, wasn’t in the best space in college to be making friends.”

“Well,” Yeri interjects before the mood can dampen further, placing a hand on Namjoon’s thigh, “that’s fine, because you have us now!”

Namjoon eyes the hand on his thigh, but says nothing. Jealousy threatens to consume you. Teetering on the brink and frankly unsure which way it would swing, you jump up from the couch.

“I’m kind of thirsty from all the dessert.” It’s a blatant lie. You’ve only had two bites. “I’ll get water for everyone.”

Extricating yourself from the situation, you march into the kitchen. Concentrating on locating the drinking glasses helps to get your mind off of what just happened and the jealousy seeps away.

The drawer where most of Namjoon keeps most of his utensils opens to reveal three glasses. Looking around for a fourth, you finally spy one sitting on a high shelf to the left of the sink.

Rising onto your tiptoes to reach for the glass, you stubbornly maintain that you can reach it if you just stretch that last inch, but a tanned arm grabs it before you can.

The clink of the glass on the counter is barely audible with the way your ears feel like they’re completely stuffed up with cotton. The warmth emanating from the figure behind you causes warmth of your own to rise in your cheeks.

You whirl around.

“I could have gotten that,” you say, trying but failing to keep the bitterness out of your tone. “I didn’t need your help.”

“You seem a little off. Are you okay?” Namjoon asks, his brown eyes scanning you. Testament to the decades of friendship you two shared, of course he would know something was wrong.

“Sorry for being a party-pooper on your birthday, Joon. I’m just tired,” you say with a sigh. “It’s been a long day.”

His hand raises, as if meaning to touch you, but stills for a moment before it drops back to his side.

“I understand. Thank you, ____. You didn’t have to do all this for me, y’know. You should have just gone home to rest.”

“But I wanted to,” the admittance comes slipping out. You frown a little as you look him in the eye. “How did you celebrate your birthday last year, Namjoon?”

His jaw, slacked in surprise, fidgets as he formulates a response. Finally, he huffs out a sad laugh. “I didn’t.”

The hollow loneliness pangs through you and even if it’s only secondhand, it’s still enough that it wraps around and constricts your heart, the emotion welling up tightly in your chest.

Against all better judgment, against the boundary lines you’d carefully drawn up, against the promise of just friends, nothing more, you reach for Namjoon’s hand. As your thumb skims over his knuckles, you marvel at how familiar the sensation of his skin under yours feels, even after all this time.

The way he watches the tender strokes of your thumb - that same lingering look you didn’t want to confront - confirms your earlier thought. The indulgent familiarity of each other’s touch is one that is shared.

“Has it been really lonely?” you ask, compassion leaking through the crack in your voice.

The pause is answer enough. And you expected it. What you didn’t expect, though, was his reply, “I have you now.”

The sheer amount of cherishment in his eyes plunges you into an abyss you can’t fathom ever emerging from.

Everything seems to move in slow motion as you lean in close, catching the way his eyes widen in your peripheral vision.

“Happy birthday, Namjoon,” you whisper into his ear. And, fuck it, you snip the final cord of self-discipline, untethered and free-falling into the dizzying swirl of emotions as you press a chaste kiss to his cheek.

You’re definitely not over him.

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iamfallinforeverything · 5 years

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I’m sorry (Peter Parker Soulmate!AU)

So it’s been a while again.. Life is just kinda messy right now. I’ve tried to write one of the requests @wwesarahjaneroszko made but I don’t really know if that’s what you wanted 😅 Also I’ve tried my best with this but Tumblr kept deleting it and I think it could be better. idk

Also I made this an soulmate!AU because I really wanted to try to write one.

Fandom: Marvel (Tony Stark and Peter Parker)

Summery: Being Tony Starks daughter was... hard. Especially when your soulmate is trying to build a connection with you.

Warnings: swearing, timeline is a little bit off (just Peters and readers age), shitty writing? also no angst this time hahah

“Daddy?”, I said as I walked up to him.

He was sitting on the counter with a cup of coffee in his hand while he was looking at something. As soon as he heard my voice he put the cup down and turned himself a little bit to look at me.

“Yes little one?”, he answered.

“What is this? Am I ill?”, I asked and tears pricked at my eyes.

I pulled the sleeve of my shirt up and revealed my arm. I kept it hidden the past few days. Everywhere were black lines and dots. They itched and from all the scratching was my arm covered in red streaks. I couldn’t thing about anything from where they would be from other than some illness. And I didn’t wanted to be ill.

My father got up and took my wrist in his hand and started to turn my arm. He let his thumb run over one of the marks before he looked at me and smiled sadly.

“No my love, you’re not ill. You don’t have to worry about them.”, he said and together we walked to the couch and set down.

“What are these then?”, I asked and looked at all the lines.

“These are your soulmate marks. Your soulmate is drawing or writing on his skin and through your connection they appear on your skin as well. When he washes them of or when they start to fade away, they will disappear from your skin as well. But they won’t hurt you. They are a little bit itchy at the beginning but that will go away as well.”, he said and wrapped his arm around my shoulders while he was speaking.

“But I don’t want a soulmate. I don’t need one.”, I pouted and crossed my arms in front of my chest.

“Everyone has a soulmate my love.”, he laughed and stroked my head.

“Was Mommy your soulmate?”, I asked him and avoided his gaze. She was a hard topic, for the both of us.

“No. We loved eathother, but we weren’t soulmates.”, he answered and stroked my head again.

“Did... did mommy found her soulmate?”, I asked and started to play with my fingers.

“Yes little one, she did.”

“Did she left because of him?”

“You’re so smart.”, he said and gave me a little kiss on the top of head. “But yes, she left because of her soulmate.”

“Do you have a soulmate Daddy?”, I asked and looked at his arms. There weren’t any marks.

“Everyone has one, I told you.”, he answered.

I shifted a little bit so I could look at his face.

“Where is she?”

“I haven’t found her yet.”, he shrugged.

“Why?”

“I had your mother. I didn’t needed her and I didn’t wanted her because when I was younger I thought that soulmates were stupid. I wanted to be independet and I wanted to choose myself with who I spend the rest of my life with. But that was stupid. Soulmates are here for a reason and I regret it that I didn’t searched for her.”, he answered and put a strand of my hair behind my ear.

“You can look for her now Daddy.”

“It’s not that easy little one.”, he smiled sadly.

“Can I draw her something Daddy?”, I asked and looked at him with my puppy eyes. He never says no when I looked at him like that.

“Of course you can little one. I’ll get you a pen.”, he laughed.

He got up to get one of the pens that laid on the kitchen isle. As he sat back down he gave it to me and rolled his sleeve a little bit more up so I had more room to draw.

“But I don’t know if she’s going to respond to your drawing. It’s been a while since we communicated.”, he said.

“That dosen’t matter. It’s just a reminder that you’re still here and that we will find her.”, I smiled and he laughed again.

“You’re way to smart for you’re age Y/N.”

I’ve started with a little butterfly. After that I drew a flower and an apple tree right next to it. Underneath it I drew my father and myself. He hold my hand and we were both smiling widely.

“Now she knows that we have an apple tree with flowers next to it. And that butterflys are always there. And we’re happily waiting for her.”, I said as I proudly looked at my work.

“It’s beautiful little one. You did a great job.”, my father answered and looked at my drawing.

“Thank you.”, I answered and started to draw a little butterfly on my own wrist.

“Do you think he will see it?”, I asked and pointed to the butterfly that I just drew.

“He will.”, he answered and gave me a kiss on my cheek.

I laughed and rolled my sleeves back down. My father did the same and then he got up and held his hand out to me.

“Come on little one, what do you want to eat?”, he asked and together we walked back to the kitchen.

Over the years the random lines and dots became little drawings and words. But I didn’t knew much about my soulmate. All I knew was that his name was Peter and that he was almost a year older than me.

And he tried to get to know me. He really did but he came at a time were my life was just chaos. My father was captured by terrorist and noone knew if he was coming back alive. And after his return I’ve stayed at his side to make sure that he was alright, like he did for me all this years. I’ve stood at his side as he announced that he was Ironman. I’ve stood at his side as he decided to change some things at Stark Industries and I’ve stood at his side as he faught against his long term partner. He had always been right next to my side and now it was simply my time to stand next to his.

And getting my soulmate to know was simply too much to handle at that time. I saw his questions and his little drawings, but often I simply hadn’t a pen with me or time to scribble an answer. And on day he just stopped trying and I didn’t made an effort to change that. My father was my number one priority and everything else didn’t mattered.

Also how was I supposed to explain that? Sorry I couldn’t write back because my Dad is Ironman and it’s a shit ton of work? No. Who would believe that?

Right now we were sitting in one of the conference rooms and listened to Thaddeus Ross. He was a dick, I could see it the moment he walked in. And his Sokovia Accords weren’t really well thought out. There were still important questions without an answer, but my father didn’t cared. All he saw was the danger he and all the other Avengers radiated. He searched for an solution for all the guilt he was feeling and these accords where the right thing. So of course he would say yes. Of course he would say it’s a good idea without thinking twice about it. Maybe I should talk with him once more when we were alone. This didn’t seemed like a good idea. Something was strange about Mr. Ross and I didn’t liked what he was implying. The Avengers weren’t dangours. They were still learning how to function as a team and how they could use all of their abilitys.

These accords weren’t the right thing to do. They made the Avengers to puppets of the goverment who would use them as they were pleased and that wasn’t a good solution. Eventhough my father thought it was the only one.

I couldn’t find the right moment to talk with him and later on everyone was sitting in the common room. They were already talking about the accords and I took a seat next to Nat.

Dad and Steve were already having a pretty harsh argument and I just watched them. Until my father pulled this picture up.

“Yes, he died Dad. It’s tragic and his death was unnesessary, but it happens. How many lost their life in an unnesessary war? How many loose their life because some asshole decided to see what it’s like to kill someone? It happens Dad and you can take his death and the deaths from all of these other people to learn from it. To be better the next time, to do better next time. Because if you sign this contract you’re going be nothing but a puppet to the goverment who will use you for all their bullshit. Who will keep you looked in here and take all your things that you’ve worked so hard on. They will take your freedom and your own will. They will take you Dad and I don’t want that for you. You’ve done so much for all of us and it shouldn’t end like this. You deserve better.”, I said and looked him in the eyes.

And for a moment I thought I would have changed his mind. For a moment I saw this agreement in his eyes but it vanished again and he started to look angry.

“Are you really on their side?”, he asked and pointed to Steve and Sam.

“I’m on nobodys side Dad. I’m not an Avenger. I’m your daughter who has to live with your choice as well and I don’t want that you make the wrong one.”

“You’re right Y/N, you are my daughter and I make the decisions. It’s my job and not yours. These accords are the only option to stop us from going on another killing spree. We need someone who will take a look over everthing from a different perspectiv. We can’t decided such things by ourself.”

“And who says you have to? You can talk with them, make a deal with them, another accord that won’t turn you into a fucking puppet!”

“Watch what you say young lady. I am still your father and not some friend from school. Be careful with what you say.”, he warned me and he looked so angry.

It’s been a while since I’ve seen him this angry.

“Fine. I just don’t want you to make a mistake that you’ll regret. I just don’t want to see you suffering again but if you want that, than go ahead, sign it and you’ll see what it’ll brings you. Because I can tell you from the look on Steves face that you’re going to loose him, as an ally and as a friend.”, I said and looked at both of them.

Steves gaze dropped to the floor and it was the first time in my life that I experienced my father speechless.

“Just think about it Dad. It’s not the right thing to do.”, I said and decided it was the best thing to leave.

As I said, I wasn’t an Avengers I wasn’t the one to make the final decision. I wouldn’t be as affected as them.

Later that day I was laying in my bed with a pen in my hand. I really needed someone right now and I had noone. Everyone wanted to be my friend because of my last name that was Stark and not because of me. I was alone on this planet. But I knew there was this special someone that was made just for me and I fucked that up as well. I ignored him because I was in so much pain and stress that I didn’t wanted him in my life right then and there. And now I wanted him more than ever in my life. Someone who I could talk to and someone who I could go to when I didn’t wanted to be home. But did he still want me in his life? I must have hurt him with my ignorance. It was worth shot, right?

So I draw a little spider right on wrist with a little speech buble that said I’m sorry.

Some time flew by and I still hadn’t got an answer from my soulmate. I repainted the little spider over and over again. I wanted an answer. I wanted to sort things out. I needed him in my life more than ever and I wouldn’t give up on him. But.. maybe he had already given up on me? He gave me same silent treatment I gave him all that time ago. Maybe he didn’t wanted me anymore? Maybe I wouldn’t fit into his life after all? Maybe I have lost him before I even met him. But I wouldn’t give up! I wanted him in my life. I wanted to make it up to him and I was at least as stubborn as my father and my soulmate was going to see that now. I wouldn’t give up on us. I would find him and would talk to him, even if that meant to search for someone who had a little talking spider on their wrist.

At the moment I was waiting for the arrival of spiderman. My father wanted to give him the suit back he made for him and ask him to be a member of the avengers.

Pepper had organized a press conference for the announcement that Spiderman was officially a member of the Avengers. While Pepper was waiting inside the press room with all the reporters and journalists, was father outside and waited for Spiderman. I stood at the window and looked down to see when Happy would arrive with him.

My father said that Spiderman was probably somewhere my age and I was more than courise to see someone this young with special abilitys. Also it would be nice to have someone to hang around with in my age. Don’t get me wrong I loved all of the avengers, they were my family, but I was by far the youngest and I just wanted to have someone that was my age. And with Spiderman I would have that.

So I got pretty excited when I saw Happys car. Unfortunatly he parked at a spot where I couldn’t see them.

“They are here.”, I said quietly to myself and walked to the door where the press conference should happen.

Between the doors were the new Spiderman Ironsuit. Because Spiderman would need it to meet the reporters. Patiently I waited for my father and Spiderman. I could see them before I could I hear them and of course my father needed his dramatic appearance so they walked pretty slowly.

I rolled my eyes and focused on the boy next to him. He was handsome, I had to admit that and his nervousness around my father made me smile. He would be good company, I knew that already.

Of course my father just kept talking to him about all that becoming an Avengers stuff and just ignored me. I rolled with my eyes again and just waited patiently for them to finish with their conversation. That was my punishmet for my outbrust over the accords. Being ignored. But I was fine with that because at the end of the day my father would still come to me to tell me about the newest stuff that happend.

And the best part was when Spiderman turned down the oppertunity to be an avengers. When he turned down to live with us in the Tower and when he chose to be the friendly neighbourhood Spiderman. My father accepted his dicision, of course he did. He would never force someone to be a part of something he didn’t wanted to be.

But right as Spiderman was about to leave I made sure he would know who I was.

“Go wait in the car. I’ll bring you home, just need a minute.”, Happy said and I smiled. My turn.

“I can bring you down. It’ll can get a little bit confusing around here.”, I said and walked up to him.

Spiderman seemed to be even more nervous when I approached him which made him even cuter.

“Yeah.. that.. that would be nice. I’m Peter.”, he said and smiled at me.

“Nice to meet you Peter. I’m Y/N.”, I answered and held my hand out for him to shake.

He looked down at my hand and immediatly his smile froze. He took my hand into his and turned it around. My sleeve had slipped a little up and revealed the little spider. Instandly I turned red and pulled my hand back to pull my sleeve down again. He certainly had to think I was some crazy fan through the little spider. After all, he was spiderman. I looked at my feet in embaresstment. What a stupid idea to draw a little spider. I could have used everything else. Why a spider?

But Peter said nothing. Instead he pulled his own sleeve up to reveal the same little spider. It was the same spider with the same speech buble that said I’m sorry. I looked at him shocked. He was my soulmate? Spiderman was my soulmate? The fucking universe was kidding with me. Ironman as father and Spiderman as soulmate? How as I supposed to live a quiet life with these two at my side. But on the other side I couldn’t be happier. He would knew exactly what I meant when I would say that all of this superhero stuff would get on my nerves. Because he was one. Because he surely had experienced the same feelings about that.

And the longer I thought about it the more I liked the idea of spiderman being my soulmate.

“What just happend?”, my father said and kicked me back into reality.

“I’ve found my soulmate.”, I smiled and looked at him.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”, he said and rolled with his eyes. But right after that he started to smile. I knew that he would be happy for me.

“It never gets boring Dad.”, I laughed and when I looked back at Peter his eyes got a little bit bigger.

“D-Dad?”, he said insecure.

“Yeah. He’s my dad.”, I answered and he swallowed heavily.

“Don’t worry. I’ll make sure he’s nice to you, right Dad?”, I said and looked at my Dad.

“I’m always nice. I don’t know what you mean little one.”, he answered and put his hands up in a defensiv position.

“I’ll remind you on that Dad. Come on Peter, I’ll bring you back down.”, I said and started to walk the corridor down.

Peter mumeled a quick goodbye and then I could hear how he walked a little bit faster to catch up with me.

“That was a test from your father, wasn’t it?”, Peter asked and look at me.

“Of course.”, I said and laughed.

Maybe it was for the better when Peter thought that it was really a test. He didn’t needed to be an avenger just yet.

We walked a little in silence. I didn’t knew what to say. There were clearly some thinks that we should talk about but now wasn’t the right time. We needed to get to know eachother.

“Hey-y Y/N?”, Peter said as we left the buliding.

“Yeah?”, I asked back and looked at him.

“Can I.. Could I have your number? So we can stay in touch?”, Peter asked nervously and scratched his neck.

His sleeve slipped up a little while he was doing it and I could see the little spider again.

“Of course.”, I answered and smiled at him.

He pulled his phone out and gave it to me. I wrote my number down and gave it back to him.

“Thank you.”, he said and I just smiled.

“Friday, could you open Happys car for me please?”, I asked her.

“Of course Y/N.”, she answered and I could hear how she unlocked the car.

“Thanks Friday.”, I said and opened the door for Peter.

He sat inside the car and I looked at him through the open door.

“I hope I’ll hear from you soon.”, I smiled.

“Sooner than you expect.”, he answered and smiled back at me.

“I’ll count on that Spiderman.”, I laughed and closed the door.

I walked the stairs back up and right as I opened the door my buzzed at I took it out of my pocket.

I’m sorry as well., stood on my screen from an unknown number.

It’s fine. I think we’re even., I answered and entered the building.

Right now I was laying in my bed and held phone up so I could see the face of my boyfriend.

“I should probably go to bed, but I really don’t want to.”, he said and smiled widely.

“You really should. Who knows when you need to get up because someone needs the friendly neighbourhood spiderman?”, I teased.

He rolled with his eyes and laughed.

“I love you Y/N.”, he said and my heart started to raise.

“I love you too Peter.”, I answered and smiled at him.

“And now the two of you can go to bed!”, I could hear his aunt scream from the back which made me laugh.

“Goodnight.”, I chuckled.

“Goodnight Y/N.”, he answered and we ended the phone call.

I couldn’t be happier then right now.

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randomoranges · 4 years

Text

a few notes on this one: so, at the time this was only the second fic i wrote for this pairing, some almost 5 yrs ago. i had a very “naïve” view of their relationship and wasn’t talking as much with the other two “collaborators/creators”. therefore, this was very much my own view and my own thoughts and my own - whatever. the Timeline wasn’t as full or as developed.

retrospectively, my view was that they got together, they were aware of the other having feelings, but they had a falling out bcs étienne couldn’t do Actual Feelings and commit. Anyways. i was going to rework it so that it could fit with the curent timeline, but doing so would remove too much of the essence of the original piece, so i left it as is. despite all that, i still find this one sweet, even if it’s a little naïve and optimistic. so i’m still re-posting it for sentimental reason, but it’s off timeline now. who knows, maybe it can be an au HAHAH.

Perfect Cities I Wanna Hold Your Hand

The strangest thing was being able to spend so much time with Étienne. For so long, their friendship had been held at a distance, through the exchange of letters and an odd phone call here and there. Now, they could see each other during meetings, they could actually plan to meet up outside of them and the novelty was something else. Therefore, there had been many more lunches, after that first one. Edward found himself seeking out his new friend at every other meeting and the two of them were spending more and more time together. It was strange to think that Étienne wanted to see him – or wanted to spend so much time with him, but it was nice to have a friend at these things.

At first, they wrote off the time they spent together as work related, but when they realised that they were spending more time discussing anything else but work related things, they dropped their fake pretenses and hung out for the sake of hanging out and enjoying one another’s company. Étienne was an interesting fellow to have around and Edward was fascinated by his way of life. (Had always been, to some extent, he’d read all about it in the letters.)

It was around that same time that Étienne gave him his phone number (again, but Étienne didn’t seem to recall Edward having it and Edward didn’t say anything), with the specific instructions of calling him whenever he felt like it. Edward returned the favour (in case his friend had misplaced it), with a nervous, shaky hand.

There had been three accidental four-am phone calls, where a sleepy Étienne had answered the phone, and twice Edward hung up, embarrassed, but on the third, he stayed on the line long enough to apologise and realise that Étienne sounded really sexy, when he was half asleep and spoke French. (And somewhere in the back of his mind he wondered what any of that was supposed to mean, but he buried it away and focused on anything else but that.)

From that point on, he made sure to establish a specific time when they could call each other, since he didn’t want to impose and phone calls could be expensive. It would be a shame to waste money if the other wasn’t there to pick up.

They spoke of trivial things; anything from the weather, to last night’s game, but after Edward accidentally stumbled on Étienne’s sketchbook, they started exchanging thoughts on current artists and galleries they had visited – art movements they liked, previous artists they had known.

Edward enjoyed these talks with his friend and he genuinely looked forward to each and every one. Étienne made him laugh and always had an interesting story to share. On top of that, he never asked why he had been absent for so long and why he had often looked out of it when they had run into each other. For that, Edward was thankful. He didn’t feel ready to relive that particular moment of his life and he didn’t want to share the details just yet.

The only problem with his friendship with Étienne was that he was slowly falling for him and he didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t let that happen. For so many reasons. Étienne was his friend, for starters, and Edward was pretty sure Étienne wasn’t interested in him that way (and that was fine, really.) Edward thought that maybe it was just his body reacting to someone being nice to him and genuinely seeming to enjoy his company after so long.

He was okay with being friends, but he had heard enough about Étienne and his multitude of escapades and thirsts to hope that he would fit his criteria – that maybe Étienne would at least... show some interest – just once, or something (and then he berated himself all over again for thinking that way).

But, apparently, he didn’t.

Edward just hoped he wouldn’t do something stupid to ruin this as well.

The other problem was that Étienne had invited him to spend a few days at his place. They were collaborating on a zine, some crazed idea Étienne had excitedly told him over the phone a while back, and Étienne figured they would get more work done, if they were standing in the same room.

Edward had no problem with that, but it meant spending so much more time with his friend and after his last two dreams, he wasn’t sure he wanted Étienne to remain just a friend anymore. (And was he even okay with wanting that from Étienne after everything that had happened? The short answer was yes, the longer answer was more complicated.)

Yet, when he landed at the airport, Étienne was there to greet him and for a moment, he conveniently forgot about his ordeal. They took a cab back to Étienne’s place, in the Plateau, and when Edward offered to pay, Étienne refused.

His friend gave him the grand tour of the apartment, before Edward was shown to his room. It was small, stuffed to the brim with Habs merchandise, but Edward thought it suited the other man. When Étienne told him he had put some away, he laughed.

Étienne then took him out to explore the city. It was a whirlwind of public transportation and many different sites. From le parc Lafontaine, to le Mont-Royal, passing by the Olympic Stadium, it was a busy afternoon and Edward was glad Étienne knew the city inside and out. It was nice to actually spend time in the city that wasn’t related to work or some grand event that took up all their time.

Edward told himself he would do something brash, to figure out whether or not he actually had a chance with Étienne, and if his friend was interested in him. Of course, he wouldn’t do anything too drastic, just something that would help him read Étienne.

He decided he would take Étienne’s hand.

Or, at least, he would try to. He hoped that by doing so, Étienne would, hopefully, take his hand and then they could move on from there.

But, if Étienne didn’t... then, well, they could always be friends and he could always dismiss this whole thing.

The problem was, though, that every time he summoned enough courage to take Étienne’s hand, his friend either scratched his face, fixed his glasses, pushed up his bag strap, or did ten million other things with his hand that impeded him from taking it.

Edward was half convinced that Étienne was doing it on purpose, as they stepped out of the métro, to get back to Étienne’s apartment. However, just as they made it to the door, he saw his opening.

He took a deep breath, counted to three, hoped his hand wasn’t too sweaty, and made a wild grab for Étienne’s hand.

He held his breath and waited for either of two things to happen; Étienne would push him away, or Étienne would take his hand.

Instead, Étienne did absolutely nothing.

And it slowly broke him inside.

Edward was about to let go and write this whole thing off, but then, to his shock and surprise, Étienne did something.

Étienne squeezed his hand back.

He looked at his friend, but Étienne’s face was unreadable. The other man looked right ahead of him, as they walked back to the apartment. Edward looked away from him and to the ground, not feeling any better. Sure, Étienne was holding his hand, but that was it.

If Edward gave himself time to think about it, Étienne’s hand was surprisingly warm and not at all what he had been expecting. His skin was rough in some places, soft in others, he was pretty sure he could feel a callous, or maybe it was just a dry patch of skin, but Edward didn’t want to let go.

By the time they got home, Étienne was a nervous wreck. He liked Edward, he really did that was never the problem and had never been.

He had tried flirting with him, on a number of occasions, but it always seemed as though Edward was more interested in friendship than romance. He didn’t mind, really, and he wasn’t even sure if his suspicions about his friend were even right.

But then, when Edward took his hand, everything changed.

For the first time, in a very long time, he was interested in someone for more than sex. Usually, Étienne never bothered with feelings and emotions. It was all about the sex. He wanted it, he went after it. However, Edward was different. He liked spending time and getting to know him. He enjoyed the phone calls they shared and the lunches they took together. He wanted to get to know Edward, in ways he never allowed himself to, and it scared him.

He was afraid that he or his reputation would scare off Edward, but when the other man took his hand, he completely froze. It seemed as though the very air around them stilled and he tried not to think about what any of this could mean. He avoided looking at Edward and instead, focused on getting home.

When they did, he was on autopilot. He had to let go of Edward’s hand to open the door, and when he stepped in, he caught a brief glance of his bright, red cheeks. He quickly went to the kitchen, hoping his friend hadn’t noticed.

“D’you want anything to drink?” He called back, rummaging through his fridge. “I was gonna have a beer.” “Or five.” He added, as an afterthought, in his head.

“Oh, sure, thanks.”

“Make yourself comfortable, I’ll be right out.” He took a long sip of his beer, tried a few deep breaths, and attempted to calm down, before he joined Edward in the living room.

They sat side by side, in silence, and drank their beers. Étienne wanted to say something, but the only thing running in his head was the feeling of Edward’s hand in his, and he didn’t know how to bring that up.

Instead, by the time he reached the end of his beer bottle, he excused himself and retrieved another one. They sat apart on the couch, both lost in their own thoughts, until Étienne silently slumped his head on Edward’s shoulder.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you, but I actually really like you.” He murmured, in the fold of Edward’s neck, his breath warm against equally warm skin.

Edward tensed and didn’t know what to say or do. Étienne liked him? As in liked him liked him? He remained perfectly still and held his breath, afraid he would miss Étienne’s strange confession. However, his friend had nothing else to say.

He was starting to think he had hallucinated everything, safe for the fact that Étienne’s head was on his shoulder, when he felt the other’s hand on his, once more.

Confused, he looked at their joined hands and hesitantly took it back, before turning to face Étienne.

He had never noticed how green his eyes were and he felt drawn to them.

For a moment, they simply looked at each other, not saying a word, and held hands. Edward felt Étienne caress the top of his hand, with his thumb, and he never wanted this to end, even though his heart was probably beating too fast.

“I... I... I like you too.” He finally managed to say. He hoped the sky wouldn’t fall on his head and he held his breath for a moment longer, waiting for the apocalypse. When that didn’t happen, he chanced another look at Étienne and saw the prettiest of smiles blossom on his face.

He wanted to see so many more.

“I’m glad. I’m sorry for earlier... you took me by surprise.”

Edward let out a nervous laugh and gave his hand a squeeze. “It’s okay. I guess... I wanted your attention and I didn’t know how to get it.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to startle you. I can be a handful, sometimes. I’m sorry if you thought I didn’t return your feelings.”

Edward couldn’t take his eyes away from Étienne’s face. He was attracted to it, there was no point denying it, and he felt his heart flutter, when he realised how close they were and the proximity of their bodies.

“No, really, it’s fine.” He was starting to think that maybe this was where he would have his first kiss, but the magic had to end, when the phone rang. Étienne apologised and went to answer.

When he returned, he suggested they start working on the zine. Edward had almost completely forgotten about it and he would have preferred returning to that earlier moment, when they had been holding hands, on the couch.

He helped Étienne set up the materials on his living room floor, before they started working. It was a good thing he enjoyed the work, for he was able to put his earlier thoughts to the back of his mind quickly, as he got engrossed in the layout of the zine.

Étienne had made a few prints for it and he was busy inking the one they would use for the next issue, while Edward pasted the pictures. Neither one of them realised the time that went by, as they had another beer and the floor became an extension of their work. It was only when Étienne went to retrieve his other brush from his bedroom that Edward realised the beautiful mess they had created.

With his brush in hand, Étienne fell back to his spot and looked at Edward’s hand at work. He couldn’t help but smile to himself, as he noticed his friend scrunch up his nose in concentration. He thought it was adorable.

There was a smudge of paint on his cheek and some under his fingernails, as well. Étienne watched Edward’s hands dance on the paper. He looked at the curve of his fingers and the bend of his joints. He watched as he folded and glued the paper meticulously in place, and he felt his heart race.

“Hey,” Edward paused and looked up. Étienne smiled at him, from his half-lying position.

“Yes?”

“I was thinking of something.” Edward gave him a curious look, as he capped his glue stick, his full attention on him.

“Yes?” He repeated.

“I wanna try something. Close your eyes.” Edward wanted to inquire about his idea, but something about the way Étienne looked at him made him obey.

“’Kay, keep ‘em closed.” He waited for whatever it was that was supposed to come. He was about to ask his friend what it was he wanted to try, when he heard the rustle of fabric, followed by the soft pressure of a pair of foreign lips on his own.

Surprised and shocked, Edward opened his eyes quickly and found Étienne leaning close, kissing him.

His mind stilled and ran twice as fast, as his breathing turned laboured and his hands grew sweaty. He waited for the worst and knew something bad was about to happen. Someone would crash in, he would be sent back there, Étienne would tell him this had been all a joke, or he would wake up, alone, in his own bedroom. But then Étienne simply pulled away.

“I’m sorry – I didn’t mean to – I just thought –”

“Do it again.” He rasped out. Étienne blinked and looked at him.

“What?”

“Kiss me again.” He said, a little louder, feeling more confident, when Étienne smiled.

This time, he was ready, when Étienne dipped his head and caught his lips between his own. He met him halfway and dared to tangle a hand in Étienne’s curly, brown locks. He let the other man lead him through his first kiss and mimicked everything he did; unafraid, exploring.

When Étienne pushed him back, he let himself fall on the discarded papers, allowing his friend’s hands to run down his body. He had never felt so alive and he never wanted it to stop.

He looked up into Étienne’s inquiring green eyes and smiled reassuringly at the question he read in them, when they pulled away, breathless. There was a piece of paper stuck in his dishevelled hair and a splash of blue India ink by his chin. He could count the marks on his face, if he wanted to, but he would have preferred kissing them one by one. For a moment, they stayed like that, with Étienne hovering over him, until he reached for his friend’s hand and threaded their fingers again.

“You can do it again.” He grinned.

“I plan to, and we’ll keep the rest for later.” Étienne murmured, warm in his ear, before he sought his lips for a third consecutive time, pressing down on him. Edward easily parted his lips for him and allowed himself to feel, for the very first time.

He was Edward, he was alive, free, and he was kissing another man.

FIN 14

Started writing: May 9th 2015, 5:22pm

Finished typing: May 10th 2015, 1:23am

Started typing: May 10th 2015, 12:12pm

Finished typing: May 10th 2015, 3:20pm

#pc: montreal #pc: edmonton #Edward Murphy #étienne maisonneuve #fic #perfect cities #no longer projocanondoko lol #au?#who knows

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monohart · 6 years

Text

felix as your boyfriend! (rotary club!au)

so i still love ong and wannaone but this mochi from stray kids got me feeling shshsjajd !!?? :)) a super random spurt of inspo (i don’t mean to demonise rich people, i apologise in advance.), anyway, enjoy!

your parents were members of a prestigious rotary club

like membership was passed down from your family members

and they had a strict member count so you could only join once an old member died or smth

membership was for a lifetime so you can’t be kicked off the club lol

once you’re in, you’re in.

anyway

the rotary club had annual meetings at the chairman’s house which is this big mansion in the richest area of town

your parents wanted you to debut in this society so they brought you along

dressed you up even

like whoa was this fancy dress and shoes even necessary?

and all this makeup??

lmao??

honestly you’d prefer to stay at home alone... perhaps invite your boyfriend felix over for a movie night

oh, but your parents didn’t know about felix.

they wouldn’t approve, since his family wasn’t in the rotary club

it was stupid, but that’s how it was.

after telling him about the stupid party you had to attend with annoying rich people who have nothing else to do but brag about their wealth, you left for the chairman’s fancy house with your parents.

dinner was served on a 6 meter long table

how they even managed to get this long of a table into the house was a huge mystery to you

and dinner was served on golden platters

served by butlers

many of them

in tuxedos

then after the chairman’s opening speech which was about some successful fundraiser the rotary club did for some rich man’s everest trip you felt sick

like they’re so rich already yet they still need a fundraiser??

ignoring your mother’s glares, you took placed your phone on your lap, only to find that you had about 4000 unread messages

from

yes you’ve got it

felix lee!!

and he was whAT??\

outside the house??

since an hour ago??

first of all, how did he get through security.

second of all,

holy shit!

you grabbed your purse and phone and ran out the banquet room, where everyone was too busy to notice your exit.

you tiptoed down the hallway to the front door, and snuck outside just as the butler turned the other way.

it was cold outside, and you were making your way down the steps to the carpark when a familiar voice called out to you.

there he was, leaning against a side pillar in leather over plaid on jeans, grinning as soon as he saw you.

felix why

you never wore dresses but you were mildly surprised when he couldn’t keep his eyes off your figure.

“babe, eyes up here.”

“also, what are you doing here.”

he took hold of your hands and smiled playfully at you, obviously in no mood to go home after coming all the way here.

you should’ve thought it through more but you were like

you know what, screw them rich elites

and pulled felix into the house

a butler was chatting with a kitchenhand at the end of the hall, so you and your boyfriend sprinted down the hallway as quietly as possible, and you pushed him into the bathroom.

and locked the door

he was leaning against the door, breathing heavily and laughing.

there was never a dull moment with felix lee, and that’s why you loved him.

and you were so beautiful in his eyes, he could never resist to be away from you.

kjdsjdsfkn

then you were staring into his beautiful dark eyes and leaning closer and closer

then your phone interrupted rudely

and

oh my goodness your ringtone.

you planned to change it before but never got the chance

it was felix saying oh my god

on loop

his eyes widened at the sound of his voice, and he gestured wildly like

‘HEY THAT’S ME!!’

you smacked him in the arm and answered the call because it was your mother

and she was super pissed

so you told her you had a bad case of bowel movements

then she sighed and hung up on you

you knew why she was pissed... because she wanted to introduce you to some heir of this medical equipment business

aka some rich spoiled nerd

so you told felix and he understood

and he ushered you out of the bathroom, not wanting to get you in trouble

hahahha ok a bit late for that right mr lee

before you knew it you were sitting next to your parents again and the rich heir guy

you had this idiotic smile on your face bc you keep thinking about your almost giant of a bf hiding in the chairman’s bathroom

like, the mere thought of an outsider sneaking into a rotary club party.

only felix would do so

and he’d probably be up to no good rn

he’s probably texting chan something like wOW YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE WHAT I JUST DID

and then getting scolded af

you burst out laughing at the thought

and the heir dude smiled, thinking the joke he just told was really funny

it was 200% not but thank goodness you didn’t even hear it so.. whoops :’)

then after the dude went back to his seat, dessert was served

dessert was a platter of small fruit tarts.

then

you had the idea of sharing some with felix

poor boy must’ve skipped dinner to come here

just as your mother turned to speak to someone, you stacked like 4 of the 7 tarts on your plate up and excused yourself from the table and made a beeline to the toilet

yeah some butlers saw you running off with the food but they just grinned.

they’ve seen their fair share of odd rich kids.

hahah, anyway you got to the toilet and knocked on the door as quietly as possible.

“pst, fee.”

he opened the door and you stepped in quickly

but

oh boy

was that...

prada perfume

on the floor

...

the room reeked with the chairman’s 872134956 dollar prada perfume that felix had been playing with

yes he spilt some on the floor and messily wiped it with some tissue

but there was a stain.

a Stain!!! on the rug and between the pearl tiles !!!

oh my god

his eyes brightened up at the tarts in your hands and you got all soft again

who can resist those puppy eyes.

you handed it to him, who took it from you carefully, and ate it one by one.

honestly that smile of his as he ate those tarts, made your day.

you took a seat on the marble countertop and watched him wash his hands.

he glanced at you warily before smiling again secretly to himself.

but you saw that bashful smile and brushed his hair softly with your fingers.

he dried his hands on a towel and then reached for yours

his fingers were still a bit damp, but they were warm and nice so you didn’t mind holding them.

in a soft voice, he tells you to go back to the party, but he simultaneously moves in front of you to trap you in place.

that sneaky lil...

“hmm? i don’t want you to get in trouble because of me. go back quickly. i’ll be okay here. i’ve made friends with dis uh, toilet paper roll.”

then you snorted really loudly and quickly covered your mouth in case one of the butlers outside heard.

“c’mon now, don’t your parents have to marry you off to some rich kid?”

you shoot him an annoyed look, and he giggled in response.

“okay, okay. no rich kid.”

he looked at your intertwined fingers silently for a long moment.

then

he looked back up at you with those round, innocent eyes.

you kinda melt right then and there

gdi felix

“let’s get outta here?”

:))

#ohmygod what did i do to myself #my face is about to explode #from grinning #felix #felixlee #straykids #stray kids #boyfriend #boyfriend au #stray kids scenarios #felix lee #felix scenarios #fluff #jyp

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1800-seungshine · 7 years

Text

responsible.

member: bae jinyoung genre(s): high school!au, hoobae!jinyoung, fluff summary: all the matters regarding bae jinyoung’s grades is now placed in your hand but it seems like it’s not just his grades that you’re going to take responsibility for. (requested - bullet point format) word count: 2.3k

note: a requested scenario by an anon! i’m so sorry if it’s really lengthy hahah but i really really hope you like it ;; thank you for requesting, once again it means a lot! as well as that, many thanks for the likes, follows and reblogs - words can’t say how much i truly appreciate it, thank you thank you ; ~ ; < 3

all a’s with a rank that never goes below than top five

you wouldn’t be a member of the student council for no reason

warm, friendly, responsible and hardworking - you’re the definition of being a blessing

esp to the teachers bc you’re one of those kids who actually help them and not give them a headache (unlike me smh)

like tbh you’re not the school president

but somehow people treat you like you are bc why aren’t you the school president??

you’re even more responsible than the school president and your attendance is better

the votes are rigged!! jk it’s not

a lot of students know you, not just because of the student council

but because you’re a really great tutor

like the greatest

you could probably take over the teacher’s job bc everyone just comes to you and asks

that’s why the teachers love you so much lmao

you have so much patience and kindness that you don’t mind getting bombarded by questions and taking your time to teach others

like forget the religion of hwang minhyun

that doesn’t exist here bc the religion of the “angelic sunbae” does

yeah you earned that endearment after some random seventh grade kid yelled that out loud when you were in tenth grade and somehow it stuck with you all the way till your last year of high school

now everyone just refers to you as that name

and that’s how bae jinyoung knew you at first

“jinyoung-ah. you see that sunbae? she’s the school’s angelic sunbae.”

jinyoung looks at the direction of his friend’s point, the smile that lights up on your face and the way your eyes crinkle as you laugh with your friends causes his stomach to churn

but this boi isn’t really the brightest so he thinks he ate something

yeh like his feelings oOHOOHOH

“angelic sunbae?” jinyoung softly repeats to himself, his eyes never leaving you.

that of course wasn’t really proven until his grades drastically dropped

apparently it dropped so much that his teacher deemed it as concerning

like the boi only went from 98% to 70% - at least he passes look at me i winged an aural test and if i get 50% i’ll be over the moon

but this cute baby did admit he was struggling with the topic they were currently learning despite feeling so insecure confessing it

so the teacher was like “issok boi, i gotchu.”

and by that his teacher meant “lemme hit you up with the only student who i know can do this bc im not dealing with your crap”

idk if your life is all sorted or you just don’t seem to have one but you happily agreed tho bc why the hek not

hence why you enter the school library and start searching for this student

you weren’t really expecting much bc you’re obviously used to helping other people when it comes to academic things

bUT HOT DAMN THIS CUTE GUY WITH A SMOL ASS HEAD STARTS CHALLENGING YOU INTO STARING COMPETITION

and bc he was the only person in that area, you assumed that he was the one you were gonna teach

i mean you were prepared to teach him

didn’t mean you were prepared for the fact that he was really handsome

you walked up to him with an apologetic smile bc even if you came right on time, he still had to wait and you felt guilty for that

“sorry, were you waiting long? i didn’t know you’d come earlier.”

meanwhile jinyoung’s just staring at you, looking all flustered and cute bc he’s freaking out on the inside

he just doesn’t know what to do in front of you so he simply shakes his head bc sha sha sha yknow

so there’s like this five second silence of awkwardness before you flash a smile at him

and your smile makes him feel alive again like is that even possible when he’s been living the entire time

“well i’m y/n and i’m going to tutor you from now on but don’t fret, i’m not that strict and as your tutor, i’ll do my hardest to make things easier for you to understand but don’t be shy and speak up if you have issues okay?”

he’s not really giving you a reply bc he’s just listening to how nice your voice is since it’s really soft and gentle

after all he hears on a daily is daehwi whining and jihoon with his stupid aegyo experiments so your voice is something he could get used to

but bc he aint answering, you’re just looking at him waiting for a reply and he’s making this entire thing more awkward than it should be so he just nods

apparently for you, that nod is enough to make you feel happy and giddy so your smile widens and he swears that the whole room just became brighter

“so, do you wanna get started??”

tIME SKIP WHOOSH WHOOSH BOIS

okay so you’ve been tutoring for about a few months, three days a week

at first he clearly wasn’t the talker but that was okay

your social skills were as good as the visuals this boi was blessing you

but bc you were really friendly, he opened up to you pretty quick

and now he’s just being a little piece of r00d crap

nowadays he’s treating you like you’re the younger one by patting your head and using his height advantage to tower over you before giving you that damn cheeky smile

sometimes he even drops honourifics and calls you whatever he feels like

“did you just call me a little kid- ” “no, sunbaenim. i didn’t say that you must have been hearing things.”

lol who says you were complaining tho, you’re growing fond of him

but ofc i made you oblivious so you wouldnt really know that you’re not just fond of him, you like him ahah howbowdah

meanwhile underneath cheeky!jinyoung is filled-with-anxiety!jinyoung who ain’t up for the fact that he could get busted anytime soon

busted for numerous reasons

cos for one, he basically knows everything you’re teaching him bc he’s outright smart

that topic that he confessed he was struggling with?

yeah that was highkey a lie, he just didn’t want to outright tell the teacher that he binged watch fancams and fan-made videos of pristin’s joo kyulkyung instead of studying for the exam (pls support pristin btw)

and second, jinyoung may or may not have started liking you

it was weird bc at first he thought he was just sick

but what sickness includes symptoms of making excuses to see a person, trying their hardest to make that person laugh and being restless at night bc all they to do is think about the person??

that’s right folks

influenza

i mean,,,

love yeh that

so those marks of his that doesn’t necessarily show improvement??

lmao jinyoung purposefully answers them incorrectly to keep his scores down

bc you tutoring him is the only way he can keep seeing you

but haha guess what it’s that time of the semester again where he gets more exams

this time tho you were gonna motivate him even more

“okay, baejin.” you say to him, pulling out his favourite drink and placing it on the table

he’s just looking at it with a cheeky grin, “wahh sunbae, i didn’t know you were the type to bribe people.”

you playfully glare at him but a smile still reaches up to your face a nano-second later

“i’m not really the type to and it’s actually my first time.”

jinyoung just grins, his eyes never leaving you as he leans forward on the table, “i must be special then.”

of course, you roll your eyes bc wow this kid used to be so shy towards you at the start and look at the boldness he has now tsk tsk

“you are special.”

enter jinyoung’s heart going ‘dugeun dugeun’ (totally making a snl reference)

jUST KIDDING HIS HEART’S HAVING A HEART ATTACK IT’S DOING BACKFLIPS IN HIS CHEST

ok ok why am i getting excited i know the ending to this wheezes

“ever since mr. jung gave me the responsibility to tutor, your grades also falls into my hands,” you begin in a rather serious tone that is immediately contrasted when he sees you grin again, “and whilst there isn’t really noticeable changes onto your results, this test might determine things so i’d like to propose a deal with you.”

jinyoung simply raises an eyebrow cos he aint taking you seriously after all the silly antics you’ve been showing him for the past few months

“y’know, this would have been more effective at the start when i actually took you a little more seriously, sunbae.”

“well, i didn’t think of it earlier okay! i’m human too,” you slam your fists on the table gently with a pout,

srsly not a good idea to be happily stuffing your face with food bc he took a lot of photos of you, reasoning that “you’re just too cute. i can’t help that.”

“bUT OI- IM NOT DONE YET. LISTEN TO ME.”

jinyoung just watches you, laughing to himself bc you’re cute when you’re annoyed. “okay, okay i’m listening.”

“right, well if you get at least over 90% for two out of your upcoming exams - regardless of any subject, i’ll reward you by granting your wish.”

lmao this boi was doing his best to maintain a poker face and not let out that mischievous smile of his bc he’s gonna pass these test with flying colours.

“well what if i don’t get a 90% for my exams?” he questions causing you to think about it.

“i don’t know, you can be my slave for three months or something. i’ll think of the consequences later but do we have a deal or not?”

he leans back on his chair, holding his chin almost as if he’s thinking about it thoroughly

a huge lie cos he’s just damn pretending

“hmmm, 90% for all exams and you have yourself a deal.” jinyoung says with a confident smile

you let out a sound of approval, slowly clapping “since when was little jinyoung so confident? are you sure?”

“of course! so deal?” he extends his hand

grinning, you take his hand and firmly shake it, “deal.”

wHOOP WHOOP ANOTHER TIME SKIP COS HAHA WHY NOT.

you were waiting for him to arrive, casually sipping your favourite drink and his on the table

once you see him enter the library, you instantly jump out of your seat

his exams are finished and the results have been finalised, resting in his bag

but he’s walking towards you with an unreadable expression

suddenly you’re feeling anxious and worried bc he looks upset and you don’t like seeing him sad

“baejin...did it not go well...?”

he’s looking down, not giving a reply and just lets out a sigh

your heart’s close to breaking bc he must have put so much effort and hardwork into studying

yet the next thing you know

there are these exam papers on the table and it certainly aint yours so you look over them

and all his exam papers were all marked with a’s and nothing below 95%

so now you’re just confused and standing there frozen bc your brain isn’t processing it well

five seconds later you look up at him, a fist raised in the air bc you were gonna punch this guy for tricking you

your tears were gonna come out wth this guy srsly

but you see that smile of his, eyes filled with so much joy that you can’t help to forgive him

“yah! i got so scared - i was gonna start crying.” you whine, slapping his arm lightly

jinyoung just lets out a laugh, ruffling your hair. “sorry, i just wanted to tease you a little.”

you roll your eyes but still grin, “whatever, weirdo but i guess i have to keep the promise so as a reward, i will grant one of your wishes! have you thought about it yet??”

he sends you a wide smile before nodding, “yeap.”

“okay, what is it?”

“spend a day out with me.” jinyoung says but instantly back pedals by stuttering a little, “i mean - if you want to though. i’m not forcing you or a-anything.”

you look a him, trying your hardest not to blush and ignoring that slight skipping of your heart. “so, like a date basically?”

“i-if you want to consider it as a d-date.”

“okay. it’s a date then.”

jinyoung just pauses then looks at you with widened eyes, “wait- what?! really? you’d go on a date with me?”

so now he’s just freaking out mentally and emotionally bc he was expecting a cold-hard rejection

he even practiced the situation with daehwi

you’re just laughing, shaking your head in amusement bc this boy can be really cute, “yeah why not? it’s not every day i get asked out by a cute guy.”

jinyoung with his red ears, blushing cheeks and grin that goes from ear-to-ear feels like celebrating

he could go on the table and just dance right there and then if he had no self control

“but can i ask you something?” you stretch your arm to poke his cheek and he immediately nods his head

“how did you get above 90% for all your exams? i thought you were struggling with these concepts.”

jinyoung sends you one hell of a mischievous grin and you can sort of tell that something isn’t right, slightly stepping backwards as he begins to explain, “i may or may not have been lying about my low grades...?”

“oH MY GOD. BAE JINYOUNG - WERE YOU JUST TRICKING ME THE ENTIRE TIME??”

“ONLY BECAUSE I LIKE YOU! FROM NOW ON, YOU HOLD RESPONSIBLE FOR MY GRADES AND MY HEART.”

“THAT DOESN’T MAKE UP FOR IT - i mean it does bUT STILL! COME BACK HERE!”

and hence to end the day, jinyoung blasts out the library and into the beautiful sunset, laughing away as you start to follow suit and beginning the chasing game.

#bae jinyoung #jinyoung #wanna one #wanna one scenarios #wanna one imagines #baejin #jinyoung imagines #jinyoung scenarios #produce 101 #pd101 season 2 #so many words #im so sorry #i hope you like it

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antiiva · 6 years

Text

tagged by @aizawashoutah, @shitabukenjirou, and @foxyena !! thank u guys so much~

1. How did you come up with your username and what does it mean?

hajime = haji, iwaizumi = iwa, haji + iwa = hajiiwa~ i love my mans but not many people understand my username

(the rest will go under the cut!)

2. Which fanfic of yours has the most feedback? (bookmarks/subscriptions/hits/kudos)

huh, well

FMK technically has the most hits and kudos (something i am a little disgruntled about, seeing as it was not a fic i worked very hard on), only fools has the most comments, kaminari is a schemer has the most bookmarks, and of fountains and flowers has the most subscriptions so idk what to tell you. i wish ofaf had more recognition bcos i’ve worked hard on it rip

3. What is your AO3 profile icon, and why did you choose it?

it’s kuroo!! and i just chose it bc i Love him and it was an icon i made that i sorta liked so

4. Do you have any regular/favourite commenters?

yes and i love them all!! seeing names that consistently pop up in my kudos/comments section really warms my heart <33 i’ve made good friends that way tbh

5. Is there a fanfic that you keep going back to read again and again?

uhh there are many that i like to go back and read, mainly by my fav authors that i’m subscribed to

6. How many stories are you subscribed to? How many do you have bookmarked?

bookmarked: 53 subscribed: honestly, i... don’t really subscribe to works? i’m subscribed to 8 authors tho

7. Which AU do you find yourself writing the most?

oooh, probably... medieval aus or domestic magic aus? and slice of life

8. How many people are subscribed and bookmarked to you in total? (you can view this on the stats page)

Subscriptions: 80 (rip, i didn’t know if u meant user subs or work subs so i combined and it’s still a tiny number) Bookmarked: 203

9. Is there something you’d like to write about but are afraid of people judging you for it? (Feeling brave? If so, share it!)

umm... i don’t think so?

10. Is there anything you would like to be better at? Writing certain scenes or genres, replying to comments, updating better, etc.

finishing current projects before taking on new ones, avoiding burnout, the usual

11. Do you write rarepairs or popular ships more often?

well i’ll go based on haikyuu since those works take up the majority-- iwaoi is set firmly in first place based on number of works followed by bokuroo, both of which are fairly popular so i’d say that i lean more toward the bigger ships but i also have works for kurooiwa, iwaaka, tengoshi, etc

12. How many stories have you posted on AO3 to this day (finished and unfinished)?

22! that number fluctuates a ton because i’m very impulsive and if a fic doesn’t receive the recognition i feel it deserves/i no longer like it/etc i take it down

13. How many stories do you have saved in/with your writing program?

that i have yet to publish? too many.

14. Do you write down story ideas, or just keep them in your head?

i normally keep them in my head, unless i think they’ll turn into something bigger and then i’ll jot them down!

15. Have you ever co-authored a story?

not yeeet~ @frenchibi have plans to tho. i have tried to co-author in the past but it mever worked out

16. How did you discover AO3?

when i graduated from using wattpad,, fun fact, there is so much smut on there that i legitimately thought ao3 was just used to write porn. i was both horrified and confused

17. Do you consider yourself to be a popular or famous author in your fandom(s) on AO3?

lol

18. Do you have a nickname or fandom name for your readers?

no...? this question assumes that i would be Popular (honestly do fanfic writers even have “fandom names” for their readers?? im)

19. Was there an author who inspired or encouraged you to write?

not really, no. i stated writing fanfics when i was really young on my own, unprompted, and i’ve met other authors through that medium that have helped me?

20. What writing advice would you give to a beginning author?

interact with other writers! i know it seems daunting, but leave comments, go to spaces where you will find other writers, participate in events-- there are few feelings more satisfying than seeing familiar names pop up, either in your notifications or in a group you’re in. most of the time, they’re all very kind and you won’t regret letting them into your life!

21. Do you plot out your stories, or do you just figure it out as you go?

i plot out almost always, though this sort of bites me in the ass. it bores me when i’m writing to already “know” what’s going to happen and that’s why i lose steam. it’s weird

22. Have you ever gotten a bad comment on a story? If so, what did you do?

sort of. i write a lot of angst and i’ve gotten quite a few “fuck you author” comments-- most of the time they’re paired with “for making me feel these feelings” or “for writing something so sad” or some shit but i don’t appreciate that bc, like, fuck you too? i’m sorry that you felt the need to cuss me out?? i tag pretty liberally and if you felt that you couldn’t handle the topic i was writing about then you shouldn’t have clicked

unless it’s, like-- a friend or regular going “fffuCK YOU AHHH” which HAS happened and makes me snicker lmao

23. Is there a certain type of scene that you have a hard time writing? (action, smut, etc..)

huh. i’m trying to become more proficient in the Big Three (smut, angst, and fluff) and thus far i’ve got one of three down p good. but specific scenes i have trouble writing would have to be scenes in which i have zero experience and pretty much have to improvise-- it helps me grow as a writer, ig, but it’s just frustrating

24. What story(s) are you working on now?

the rest of the writers’ inktober prompts

a fic wars piece with @frenchibi

a post breakup iwaoi

of fountains and flowers final chapter

a handful of voltron fics, 4 of them sheith

alien!iwaizumi

maaaany half-abandoned drafts

25. Do you plan your next project(s) before you finish your current ongoing story(s)?

YES AND IT IS TERRIBLE SOMEONE STOP ME

26. Do you have a daily writing goal set for yourself?

nah. motivation is fickle and i don’t want to make writing a chore. writer’s inktober was hard enough (it’s december and i am still not done :,)

27. Do you think you’ve improved as a writer since you first started?

considering i started on wattpad, yes lmao. i’d like to think that i have since i’ve been on ao3 but hahjajhjkh

28. What is your favorite story that you’ve written?

i reeeeally liked writing a bit of magic is key and three’s a crowd because they were both humorous domestic magic aus~ but i’ve liked most things i’ve written tbh. also, obviously, of fountains and flowers.

29. What is your least favorite story that you’ve written?

that i’ve posted? i honestly don’t know. maybe you can be so stupid sometimes because i was just starting to write iwaoi and i now hate the way i portrayed them, not to mention that this dumb little fic has more kudos than my recent stuff and i just *clenches fist* don’t think it deserves that

30. Where do you see yourself (as a writer) in 5 years?

not sure. maybe i’ll have ofaf finished by then hahah,, but really i don’t know. writing is a tool but fanfic writing is just a hobby

31. What is the easiest thing about writing?

i’m pretty good at writing emotionally charged situations. also dialogue, i find banter or long back-and-forth conversations fairly easy

32. What is the hardest thing about writing?

transitions, justification of characters’ actions. the hardest thing writing-related would be fighting through envy and feelings of inadequacy but i experience the former plenty anyway rip

33. Why do you write?

i write because i enjoy it-- i love creating my own worlds, interacting with other writers, living vicariously through my characters

well, that was fun! i’ll tag @frenchibi, @astersandstuffs, @minyardxva, @josai

#i would tag more but i am Lazy #and i have a billion tags to catch up on #tagged #thank u three btw!

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nothesc · 7 years

Text

More than words - A Yousana AU. Chapter 1

Idea explained here

All the chapters here

CHAPTER 1: SUMMER 2011-SPRING 2012

There are five holiday breaks in Norway. During those breaks kids don’t have to go to school so even if for whatever reason you don’t celebrate those festivities you still don’t have class. That makes it a good chance to go somewhere else and relax, spend time with your family, maybe even make new friends.

Five holidays breaks that go along the year.

The summer break, the biggest of them all, starts on late June and ends on August. After that, the school year begins and it’s not until late September/early October when the autumn break comes, it only lasts a week but it’s something. Then Christmas arrives, 2 weeks without going to school, 2 weeks to relax. Just like autumn has its break, winter also has one, this one takes place on late February/early March and just like the previous season’s break it lasts a week. Then finally comes Easter, every April, kids, and also teenagers of course, have a free week.

As said before, these breaks give families the best chance to spend some time together, far away from the city.

For Yousef’s family that means going to the cabin in the woods. Every year, almost every holiday, they go there. The cabin in the woods is a pretty big house with four bedrooms, not that they need the four bedrooms, and two floors. Yousef always takes the room in the attic, he loves the views and the calm that comes with it. At first Yousef loved going to the cabin but as he grows up he starts to get bored, he rather spend his breaks back in Oslo with his friends. His family rents the house for the first month of summer, the autumn break, the second half of Christmas and the first 4 days of Easter. Someone would say that the Acar family are the best costumers for that cabin, but they aren’t actually the only ones who stay a big part of their year there.

Sana’s family started to rent that house for holiday breaks before Sana had even been born. As if they were taking turns with the Acar family, though they had never met and they wouldn’t for a really long time, the Bakkoush family would stay in that cabin during the second month of summer, the first week of Christmas, the winter break and finally the last 4 days of Easter. Sana had to fight a lot with her two brothers, Abdu and Elias, to let her take the attic room. Eventually she won the battle and the room was hers. She likes being there. She has never been a very social girl. Sure, she has friends but not as many as her brothers have. In fact, she has never taken any friend to the cabin, unlike her brothers who always have guests. That may be the reason why Sana starts to dread going to the cabin, she always feels alone there.

SUMMER 2011 (11 and 13 years old)

On the summer of 2011 as Yousef had been in that cabin for almost three weeks already, he was starting to get on his nerves. He kept pacing around the room trying to think about something entertaining to do. Of course, nothing came to his mind. He was about to give up when suddenly he tripped and almost fell. When he looked down to the floor to try to find out what had made him trip he realize that there was a loose slab. He kneeled to the floor and took the slab in his hands. In the spot it had left on the floor there was a gap, big enough to hide something. For a moment he got excited, what if someone had hid something there and he was about to discover it? But the hole was empty. He was a little disappointed at first but then an idea came to his mind. What if he was the one that would hide something there? But now the question was…what should he hide? It wasn’t like he had anything he wanted to get rid of. For 15 minutes he sat on the floor looking around the room trying to think about something good. His eyes stopped in the wooden wardrobe that had a broken door. He remembered how the first time he got there that summer, three weeks ago, as he was about to open the wardrobe, the door fell and hit him in the foot. In that moment he wished someone, a previous tenant, would’ve warned him. What if he did exactly that? What if he wrote a note for the next tenant warning them about the broken door, that was a good thing to do, right?

He stood up and grabbed a notebook and a pen.

“Hello there unknown person. If you’re reading this you’ve found the loose slab on the floor and just like me you’ve been curious enough to look in the hole hoping that you’d find something. Congratulations! You found me. Sorry if I’m not what you were waiting for. But I’m actually here with a good tip. Be careful when you open the wardrobe door. Unless it gets fixed after I leave next week (it’s July 2011, just in case you don’t see this until like a million years) if you try to open it too hard it’s going to fall on your feet and hurt you, trust me, it happened to me. I don’t really know what else to say, I’m actually feeling kind of stupid for writing this when no one is probably going to see it. I’ll feel like a complete dumbass when I get back here on autumn break and find this same piece of paper with no answer on it. Anyway, at least I’ve tried. Hope your stay here is more interesting than mine, but honestly, that wouldn’t be that difficult. Well, bye!”

He folded the paper and placed it in the hole. Then he took the slab and put it back in its place. Yousef knew that he probably wouldn’t get an answer, but at least now he had a reason to look forward to his next visit to the cabin.

-x-

Sana sighed, only three more days and she finally would be back in Oslo. Not that her life was that interesting back home, but at least she didn’t have to be in the same place for a month. She was sitting on the bed looking at the floor trying to think about something that would entertain her. From her room she could hear her brothers’ laughs, they had brought some friends and were playing outside. It wasn’t like they wouldn’t let her play with them. On the contrary, Abdu and Elias always asked her if she wanted to hang out with them, but the truth was that most of the time Sana just wanted to be left alone. As she was lost in her thoughts something caught her attention. There was a slab on the floor that seemed out of place. She hadn’t noticed it before. She frowned and kneeled down. Sana took the slab and found a hole under it, big enough to hide something there. Without even thinking about it, Sana introduced her hand in the hole and tried to find something. She was about to give up when her fingers touched a piece of paper. She took it and unfolded it eagerly. There was a message, a short message from a previous tenant, and they had been there almost at the same time as her –the note said it was July 2011 and now it was August-. She looked at her wounded foot as she read the part about the broken wardrobe door. It had fallen on her foot the first night there. As she finished reading she thought for a moment. Should she answer? What if it was a psychopath trying to get her attention? But it really didn’t look like it and she didn’t have to reveal any fact about herself to answer. Besides, that person had tried to warn her about the door, the polite thing to do was to say thanks, right?

She grabbed a pen from her desk and started writing.

“Hi! How are you? Well, I guess it doesn’t make much sense to ask you that. It’s August 2032 here, guess it’s been awhile since you wrote that letter…Kidding!! It’s August 2011 so just a few weeks after you left, I guess? I just wanted to thank you for the tip even though I read this note way too late. Me and my wounded foot say hi to you. Since you gave me a tip, I’ll give you another. I don’t know when you’ll be back, if you’ll be back, but a word of advice? Don’t sleep with your window opened in summer, the mosquitoes will kill you. I’ve been bitten so badly this summer and I only slept with my window opened one night. At least next time I’ll be here it’ll be during Christmas break so I won’t have to worry about them, right? Well, I guess that’s pretty much what I wanted to tell you. Thanks again for the tip and don’t feel stupid, you got your answer ;)”

AUTUMN 2011 (11 and 14 years old)

To say that Yousef had spent the rest of the summer thinking about the possibility of him finding an answer to his note when he’d come back to the cabin would be a lie. Being honest he had pretty much forgotten about it as soon as he had arrived back to Oslo.

But when September came and it was time for him to go back to the cabin he found himself thinking about that every day.

As soon as he stepped into the cabin that autumn the first thing he did was run to his bedroom and close the door. He sat on the floor and took a deep breath before taking the loose slab in his hands. His heart beat fast in his chest as he introduced his hand in the hole and picked up the paper. He unfolded and grinned widely when he saw that his handwriting wasn’t the only one in the paper, someone had answered.

He laughed a little while reading it and as soon as he ended he grabbed a pen and wrote an answer

“I’m sorry to hear about your foot! Hope it’s okay now. And yeah I got bitten by the mosquitoes too, guess our blood is really tasty hahah…Okay that was a lame joke. Sorry!. To be honest I wasn’t expecting a reply, I guess we all get bored here in the cabin, right? By the way, I’m also going to be back here for Christmas…hmmm…I wonder how that will work. Guess we’ll know in a few months. Thank you for your answer and I hope you have a good autumn!”

CHRISTMAS 2011 (12 and 14 years old)

“I’m always here the first week of Christmas. We don’t celebrate Christmas in my family so we like to get away from the city. But on the second week we go back and spend some time with the rest of the family. A word of advice? When you come here next week don’t sleep with your window opened, you won’t get bitten by mosquitoes but you will literally freeze. Oh and by the way, yeah your joke was kind of lame but I’ve heard them worse, so don’t worry”

-x-

“Oh, I see, I’m always here the second week of Christmas. It’s pretty much the same with my family but in reverse order. We spend the week with the family and then we come here for the second week and celebrate New Year’s Eve here, exciting…I know. And of course I won’t sleep with my window opened! It’s December, do you think I’m crazy??? Oh and thanks for being nice about the joke but you shouldn’t be that nice, you’ll make me think that it’s okay to say lame jokes and you’ll never hear the end of it. Happy New Year by the way! I guess this question doesn’t make much sense but…when do you come back?”

WINTER BREAK 2012 (12 and 14 years old)

“Happy new year to you too!! I’m back here again! (it’s winter break, 2012) Well in that case I hate your lame jokes please don’t make one like that again! (jk, it wasn’t that bad). And hey, I was just trying to prevent you from getting frozen but okay…girl? Boy?...I just realized I don’t really know anything about you. Maybe you could tell me something, like your age for example? Please tell me you’re not a 40 years old man, that’d be creepy. I don’t want you to tell me your name though, I like the anonymous thing, it’s interesting and it feels safe, if you know what I mean. I’ll be back on the last four days of Easter, hope there’s an answer when I come back”

EASTER 2012 (12 and 14 years old)

“I’m not a 40 years old man!! I’m 38! Haha just kidding, another lame joke. I’m a 14 years old boy actually. And I agree with you with the anonymous thing, I think it’s better if we don’t know much about each other’s personal life, it’s more interesting this way. By the way I’m here for the first 4 days of Easter so I guess you’ll come back after I leave. It feels as if we were taking turns to be in the cabin hahah. Guess it was destiny that we would meet…well not meet, but talk.”

-x-

“Ufff, I feel a lot better now. I’m a 12 years old girl, yeah yeah, I’m a little kid whatever…I’m sure I’m more mature than you. I actually think that I saw your car leaving when I got here? A nice white car? You know what? Forget about it, we’re trying to be anonymous here, we can’t know which kind of car we have either…I guess? So I won’t be back until summer, will you be here like last year?? I pretty much come the same dates every year so I guess now you know when I’ll be here. What about you? Was this year an exception or is it the rule? And yes I guess destiny was trying to make us meet…write…whatever. I’ll read you on summer!”

---------x-------

Well this is the first chapter!!

I really hope you’ve liked it

I’ll tag all the chapters with “more than words au” and I’ll also post it on ao3 in case someone prefers to read it there

Thank you so much for reading and I hope it wasn’t confusing with so many time jumps

#skam #yousana #more than words au #nothesc au

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tony-luvv · 7 years

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Who Said Fate Was Always Right?

Saw a gif ((which I will tag later, I am currently on mobile)) and this is what happened....

CANT YOU SEE IT ! like steve keeps trying to play flirt with tony and he shuts it down or gives negative feedback every time

xXx

Steve: Looking good today Tony ;) Tony: I guess so Steve: So Tony, are we ever going to stop beating around the bush and go on a date? Tony: Maybe if you got a job that supplies an actual paycheck i would consider it..

Like actual fuck boy Steve and Tony honestly doesn't have time for this bullshit

xXx

Steve: You never hang out with me anymore. Tony: Yeah i know. Steve: Well why not? Tony: Cause your not on my list of priorities

Tony texts Steve about an Avengers meeting and later they start bickering and Steve's all 'well you obviously missed me since you messaged me...' Tony just looks at him like he's stupid and then deletes his number so when Steve texts him later he texts back "who's this?" Steve: "hahah Tony, it's me." Tony: still don't know who 'me' is... Steve is all "your not that funny." and Tony sends him a screen shot with "Sorry i don't memorize every random number that texts my phone." "ITS STEVE , why dont you have my number saved!?" Tony: oh i was deleting unimportant numbers the other day ..

THIS WOULD BE PERFECT FOR A SOULMATE AU

Tony and Steve are soulmates and neither new until after Steve fucked up too many times and so Tony's like fuck this guy im not staying with him if he only likes me because of some fate bullshit and Steve is all trying to convince Tony that they are MADE for each other and Tony is like "huh , there must of been a defect or something."

xXx

Steve causally puts his hand on Tony's shoulder and Tony looks down at it like "why are you touching me?" Steve awkwardly laughs, "Come on Tony, were soulmates." "......i dont see how thats related to this situation." He moves away, "Don't touch me." "Why do you keep acting like this Tony!" "Cause i Dont like you Rogers. Case and Point." "What's it going to take for you to stop this childishness!?" "If i bother you so much, why do you keep coming back?" "BECAUSE WE'RE SOULMATES!" "You're starting to sound like a broken record."

Sam and Bucky are talking with Steve and Steve mentions the whole Tony situation. Steve: It's fine, he'll come around... Tony enters the room and snorts when he heard their conversation, "Actually, he or should i say that i have a date tonight."

Steve: where are we going? Tony: im not sure where you are going but im going out with a new outfit on to impress my hot date. Sam: what are you talking about? Tony: well today i ran into an old college classmate and he asked me to dinner, im single so i figured 'why the hell not?' Steve: like hell your going out with someone who isnt me! Tony: im sorry father did i not ask for your permission, was this before or after you neglected to tell me your old war body murdered you... oh thats right , silly me , you aren't my dad your just the guy that fate thought would be a good idea to pair me up with .... guess they should have double checked theyre list twice like santa clause caused they missed Bucky Barnes by a few hundred thousand souls.....

Side note: I do NOT hate Steve, like at all. But sometimes when I think about CACW I feel like I wanna be petty.

#rachel rambles #post cacw #that movie got me fucked up #feeling petty #soulmate au #tony is above abusive relationships #love tony stark #not stony friendly #but could be other pairings #ironpanther #starkquill #starkstrange #billionaire boyfriends

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resbang-bookclub · 7 years

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AMA Transcript: The Art of Losing

Last week, @redphlox, @sojustifiable and @soundofez stopped in to talk about their 2016 Resbang, The Art of Losing! Here’s some of what went down:

Q: What is your fav scene, to write or just based on how it turned out!

redphlox: I def had fun writing the climax, it was so much drama and I. love. writing. drama. I'm happiest with that. I also really enjoyed writing the middle section, where Soul and Maka are traveling, because i got to build their relationship in small scenes. It was fun to write a scene and realize it could lead to something else. It blossomed.

Q: Amanda and fez, you both did some really cool unique art! What made you wanna work in those mediums and how did you decide what scenes or subjects you wanted to art?

Amanda: Last year my default position was that I wanted to write music because I wasn't as experienced with visual art and I love writing songs based on stories and I definitely decided to stick with that for Julie's because she has a really poetic style that made for good lyric mining. And then for my other piece, marsh had sent me a bunch of cool art supplies and I wanted to try them out so I decided to do some work with pastels.

fez: I had enough Resbangs that I wanted to do something different for each one? And I'd been wanting to animate lately and I knew I could find gifs to trace from Anastasia so that helped. The third gif tho... so the night before post day I felt like I hadn't really done enough with the Fic Itself, all I really did was trace movie gifs and idk, I wanted to actually have scenes from the fic. So I started skimming and looking for things to sketch and then I came across one particular line that inspired my third gif and... that one took over lmao rip.

Q: What made you inspired to write an Anastasia AU?

redphlox: I was watching the movie and I thought "Imagine Soul in Dimitri's outfit" and it snowballed from there! I also love Anya and Dimitri's relationship, they have a lot of sass at first and grow to like each other, and I saw a lot of SoMa in them.

Q: Amanda/fez, do you feel like you grew in ur arting skillz from this Resbang, and how so? Same for you and writing, Julie.

fez: I learned that animating hair is stupidly difficult hahah. But yes, I definitely learned things about animating (namely how it takes a suuuuuper long time) and it made me appreciate animation so much more.

Amanda: Every time I write a song it definitely gets easier and I can rely more on motivation than waiting for raw inspiration.

redphlox: Hmm I felt like I grew in the plotting department. Style-wise, I learned I change styles a lot, and finding my voice for this fic was incredibly hard at first. It took 3 months to iron out the beginning because of these things, but the rest flowed after I found something I could own. I also learned to write faster and to be more disciplined. I committed to doing 1k a day to trudge through the difficult parts, and on days where I felt inspired I did a lot more than that.

Q: What was the hardest scene to write?

redphlox: Lord, the hardest was the beginning, for plotting reasons. I kept writing and deleting and adding characters and deleting them, it was awful. Overall I think the opening scene gave me more hell than it should have because I couldn't decide how I wanted Soul and Maka's relationship to start.

Q: What kinds of things did you do to find the voice and tone for the fic? Are there any writing rituals you have?

redphlox: I have to find a song that puts me in the feel of the scene I'm writing and I listen to it on repeat the whole time, haha. And to get myself pumped up, I read a lot of good writing that I admire.

Q: Do you do playlists for each fic?

redphlox: I listen to the same songs when I write, tbh. I listened to "4 page letter" by Aaliyah a LOT for this fic. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2maiIc_LACs). The lyrics don't fit the fic but I love the emotion behind Aaliyah's song, and her voice is beautiful. The longing is real, and that's what I wanted Soul and Maka's relationship to lead up to. I also listened to this song over and over again: https://youtu.be/bs2VL_HYG9Y.

Q: What inspired Maka's parents story for you, if anything? I know that that was an interesting subplot that I was not expecting when I read it!

redphlox: I wanted to stick to canon, but I also wanted to borrow from the movie, haha. So Spirit and his wife not having the best relationship comes from the manga, and everything else was a sprinkle from the movie. I was just trying to make everything plausible and it turned out into this subplot xD. All the little bits of what Maka COULD remember had to make sense in the end so I had to think and think and think.

Q: The jazz scene was one of my faves, and one that didn't really have a movie parallel. Was that a scene that you knew to write from the beginning, or did it pop up on its own?

redphlox: That scene literally popped up on its own. It was one of those that bloomed because of the previous scene. I also wanted to address Soul's love/hate relationship with music and extend the metaphor of Maka being able to see things around her, and that included Soul.

Q: Did you do any research to nail the period? Same question to all.

fez: Julie gave us clothing references ;v; I... really didn't do any research.

redphlox: Oh yeahhhh. I know the movie is set in the 1920s-ish and I wanted my fic to be vague time-period wise so that I didn't have to commit to too many intricate details, but I did look up clothing references for Amanda and fez. And I had to research transporation methods for that time period, because Soul and Maka spent so much time doing that. I wanted to be subtle, but not entirely inaccurate. Idk how many times I googled "1920s women’s fashion" in different words.

Q: What are you most proud of?

redphlox: I'm most proud of how much I wrote in so little time. I lost 3 months agonizing over my writing style and the opening scene. I don't think I got the beginning down until after second author check-ins. So when it just clicked, I cranked out 13k one week, 10k the next, and 5k in one day :0 It was insane. I'm also really proud of chapters 5-8 because everything was piling up for the characters and I introduced Spirit and Wes, and tension were running high between Soul and Maka. I can't tell you how much I love to make them suffer.

Q: I loved the part where Soul is like "WAIT WHAT BOY" when she "remembers" him when they're in the train. Did you pull from anything specific to get those emotions across?

redphlox: Ahhh I pulled from those depression feels of inadequacy LOL. He was just touched that he had an impact on her, bc the time they had together was v little. ;-;

Q: Did you watch the movie a lot? I really love how you managed to capture the feel of it while staying true to the spirit of the SE characters. How did you manage to walk that line so well?

redphlox: Ahh, I watched it the first time when I decided to write it, and then I watched it with fez at her house, and I watched it again when I was at my most frustrated with writing. Anddd I love that movie so much, it's one of my favorites, and I wanted to do it justice. I wanted to capture its feeling, because it's so beautiful and nostalgic. I didn't want to take everything from the movie, because some of it didn't fit the characters. Like, I couldn't see Soul trying to con someone for their money, like Dimitri did in the movie, but I could def see Spirit heartbroken but hopeful of seeing his daughter come back one day, even if it was stupid.

Q: Did you have any beta comments Julie that you particularly liked/thought were funny/encouraged you?

redphlox: All of bendandcurl's comments were super encouraging and insightful, and anytime Proma gave me a thumbs up on something I did feel like a proud student. Because my fic was more of a serious drama than fluff there weren't any funny comments besides the occasional gif during a serious moment in the fic.

Q: Okay but. Anya. Did you consider having her make an appearance?

redphlox: Oh I did! I had originally written Anya coming into the bakery to meet Soul in the very beginning to talk about their thing but leave after he didn't show up. That way later, when the truth was revealed, Maka could've had a lightbulb OH moment. But then I decided against it and left Anya as a background character.

Q: fez, I wanted to ask why you liked the spirit and maka gif so much, what inspired you to pick that scene?

fez: Ahhhh I have a lot of family feels, so when I saw the twirlies I... I wanted it. Maka's pigtails made me suffer but in the end it was worth it.

Q: What was [everyone's] favorite part about collaborating?

Amanda: Oo well first of all I was excited to work with fez and Julie because they are both gr8 and I had no idea Julie was writing it, so it was a really fun surprise, and then also a perfect fic to write a song for because Julie has so many good phrases to pull for lyrics.

fez: I also flipped out when I found out I'd be working with Julie and Amanda ;v; probably I had the most fun throwing my WIPs around ahah;;

redphlox: I was so stunned when I saw that Amanda picked mine, and that multiplied when fez joined. :0 It was a wild ride, and seeing their progress on their art was phenomenal like, they truly brought it to life and I'm so grateful for their hard work. I'm happy with it, it was a good team.

#AMA transcripts #resbang book club #rbbc

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qorktrees · 3 years

Note

1, 16, 20, and 21!!!

hehe thanks for sending in numbers!! putting this under a cut because it got LONG, why do i always talk too much

1. What’s your favorite character(s) to write for?

Similar to you, I like writing characters who are more introspective... Gotta love that internal narration. I like characters who are a little insecure and a little broken but who have a lot of love in their hearts. Not necessarily angsty characters! For example, Stiles (Teen Wolf) and Edward Elric (Fullmetal Alchemist) are two characters who I always have a ton of fun writing, and whose voices have always come easily to me. Dumbasses with no filter... who still manage to be introspective HAHA. On the other hand, I also really enjoyed writing Saïx (Kingdom Hearts) in my sea-salt fam fics. Saïx is (arguably) Not a dumbass. I like that he talks a little more formally and his internal narration has a very different flow than characters like Stiles, but it's still very nice to write.

16. What fanfic tropes do you avoid writing for?

Good question. It's always easy to think of things you like rather than the things you don't like! At least, I Try not to expend too much of my time/energy on things I don't like. I avoid super dark themes or heavy angst such as major character death, simply because I am too softhearted to handle them. I probably write my characters being too emotionally mature and openly communicative but miscommunication hurts me (UNLESS it is a comedy of errors, in which case it fills me with glee) so I also tend to avoid major miscommunications in my fics and seek sources of tension elsewhere. I'm generally not a fan of hatesex so you probably won't catch me writing it, as well as enemies to lovers without a strong friendship step in between. Are these all tropes? Sometimes I get confused hahah.

If we're talking about Teen Wolf specifically (because that is what I have been mainly reading/writing lately), I have a whole list of fandom-specific tropes that are simply not to my preference and so will likely not show up in my fics. Not sure I should air them all out lmaoooo but to give a hopefully not-controversial (/sweats) example, one of them is magical Stiles. I'm picking this one as an example because I am actually currently writing a magical Stiles fic, so exceptions can happen, clearly.

20. What feedback makes you the happiest to hear?

I view any (positive) feedback as a super kind gift, and I'm really happy and grateful to receive them, but if I have to be honest about the type that makes me the happiest? It's the comments that go beyond the surface content of the story and compliment the writing itself. The flow, the word choice, the dialogue, the characterization; specific passages and turns of phrase; other aspects I'm forgetting to list. Picking out and commenting on anything like that super touches me.

21. Is there an idea you’ve always wanted to write, but haven’t yet?

LOL WHY ARE YOU PUTTING ME ON BLAST, THERE ARE FAR TOO MANY!! How is it that I feel like I'm bad at coming up with ideas, and yet I'm constantly drowning in a sea of WIPs and ideas that never left the planning stage?

Actually, I realized the answer as I typed that: It's because I move onto my next fandom and have trouble coming up with new ideas, but I still carry with me ideas from previous fandoms that I'm still fond of. Now imagine this pile of ideas has been accumulating for... years (we're not going to talk about how long I've been writing fanfiction). So I say I have trouble coming up with ideas, but I also have a years-old backlog because I am bad at finishing fic but also bad at letting go.

ANYWAY, to answer the question, I decided to list a few specific fics I want to write but haven't yet, and then some tropes/AUs I've always wanted to write but haven't yet!! For specific fics, I did pick a couple I technically started writing, but only a few hundred words (I definitely have WIPs with more progress made that I also want to finish eventually, but I figured ones with less progress are more in the spirit of "want to write but haven't yet").

(Fullmetal Alchemist) Roy/Ed Pacific Rim AU. I wrote a couple hundred words for this one and have the general outline figured out, and yet it’s been sitting unwritten because I got stuck on a key detail LOL. Anyway, Ed and Al are co-pilots, but they have to drift with other rangers as part of a training exercise. Problem is, Ed isn't drift compatible with anyone else... except, it turns out, with the Marshal, Roy Mustang.

(Kingdom Hearts) Sea-salt Fam werewolf AU. Experienced werewovles Isa and Lea take in recently-turned Roxas and Xion. Pack dynamics! Isa trying to be the alpha and protect/take care of everyone but he doesn’t know wtf he’s doing! Realizing that he’s not in this alone and that they're all there to support each other! Scenting! Cuddling! This will never be written because it doesn't have a plot, only FEELINGS!

(Kingdom Hearts) Riku/Roxas band AU. Modern/mundane AU!! Roxas is in a local band!! Riku is smitten and #Awkward!! Summer and young/first love vibes!! You made a playlist for it and it's amazing and it's been on the backburner for like 2 years but I still really want to write it!! Technically I wrote a few hundred words for this too but I want to rework some stuff in the plot so it doesn't count!!

(No fandom) Love spell AU where everyone is in love with character A, except character B, who acts totally normal around them for SOME reason. They work together to reverse the spell. Character B is either fully aware why the love spell doesn't seem to be affecting them, or they're an entire idiot and have no clue. Honestly, both are good.

(No fandom) Outsider POV fic! Outsider POV fics are fun, but I don't think I've ever written one! I don't have a specific scenario in mind, but some ideas are the POV character not understanding how A/B work together... until they really, really do. OR, POV character thinks A/B are stupid in love and omg why won't they get together already, this is just so painful—what do you mean you've been married for five years?!

(No fandom) Listen I'm not smart enough to write this so who knows if I ever will, but I still desperately want an academia AU where characters A and B drag each other in their publications only to meet at a conference and have an "OH NO THEY'RE HOT" moment. (Is this enemies to lovers? Okay, you got me, the only time I like enemies to lovers is when it's incredibly petty.)

I realized all my "want to write" specific fics are total AUs, and then I realized it's because it's easier for me to write/finish canonverse fics; I get too caught up on the DETAILS of AUs.

Anyway, hope you enjoyed my very long-winded answer, sorry I can't seem to shut up!

#ask #aarlert #me: makes a post #me: edits it ten times immediately after posting

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todokori-kun · 7 years

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That is definitely one of the most beautiful, touching hugs in the history of fandom.

Yeah, idk how that kid would need human food either. I mean, even if some part of Kaneki is still human, HE can’t eat human food so why would the child be able to…?

(Ok, but imagine how OP a Touka/Uta child would be. They’d get either Touka’s kagune (which is at least worthy of an S-rating) or Uta’s (while we don’t know what his kagune can do we can assume it’s poweful; No-Face was a pretty infamous ghoul after all) or both, if they somehow won the genetic lottery. They could get Uta’s crazy regeneration and/or his shape-shifting abilities. They’d get Uta’s talent for trolling and Touka’s terrifying rage…there’s also the theories that Uta can create clones. And they would have Uncle Yomo completely wrapped around their finger.)

I think I actually want this to happen. Kaneki’s just really confused and leaves Touka and the kid alone to do as they please, and he does try to be a good ‘dad’ when the child gets older, teaching them that they are next in line to be the OEK and that they have lots of duties and responsibilites. The child, despite looking suspiciously familiar, turns out to be very intelligent and a good listener so Kaneki’s relieved.

Then the moment Kaneki asks the child to become the new OEK:

“lololol sorry Kaneki-san but Uncle Nico and Aunt Itori are coming to pick me up, we’re going to go watch the world burn and old losers with white hair are not invited”

“Wait what

Is this what it’s like to watch your kid go through puberty”

WAIT.

Remember how we used to talk about a TG Hamilton AU and decided that the characters didn’t fit.

This could actually fit now.

Touken child inherited Touka’s temper and Kaneki’s love for books along with Touka’s dedication to her studies, which makes them a perfect Alexander.

Eto is Washington.

Ayahina child is Eliza.

Amon/Akira child is Burr.

Ishida could be forgiven if he has Eto adopt the Touken child and take them somewhere far away from Japan. But he’d definitely be forgiven if, when they step off the plane, the kid sees someone walking towards them while waving and asks who it is…Eto smiles gently and replies, “That’s your Uncle Hide.”

Watch it and drown in the feels with me, because I’m re-watching it right now too because of my little sister (who’s five years old and seems to be weirdly fond of Bucky…I’m certain she didn’t care about him at all when we watched the first Captain America movie. Now she pouts whenever I mention Bucky, and refuses to let me call him ‘the Winter Soldier’ because NO he’s BUCKY he did nothing wrong).

btw, do you know Vision/Wanda is probably going to be a thing in future movies? It’s already sort-of a thing in Civil War

Yay, hope you like it :)

oh wow, now that you mention it she WAS a lot like an angstier, overdramatic version of Catwoman. Sad thing is that she could probably have been a decent OC if I wasn’t too immature to make good character at the time. My problem with character development was that I was way too addicted to angst…

Oh, now that you mention it though, Naomi has both a chimera kagune and a kakuja XD she’d be op if not for the fact that she has no idea how to use either.

They really do sound great! It’d be cool to see a story (no matter how short or long) with Nara and Kya sometime ;)

Tysm <3333 I’m really glad you liked him! I’m working on the Naomi/my other OCs submission right now :)

And yes, Tatsuo is trash. Magnificent trash. Chaotic neutral leaning towards evil. I have this scene where he gets sort-of wrecked by an investigator, and when he’s lying on the ground trying to recover the investigator insults him for his behavior (“what, do you like getting beat up, you masochistic bastard?”). Tatsuo promptly arranges his face into a…um…slightly 'suggestive’ expression while batting his eyelashes at the investigator (“And if I do? What are you going to do about it, sir~?” in a very breathy voice).

He uses the investigator’s disgust/embarrassment as a distraction to give himself time to heal his wounds, then promptly gets up and slices off the man’s head.

It really is lovely <3

(that gif tho)

Historia and Ymir are waltzing to that song. Suddenly, Ymir asks Historia to look at her and apologizes for being stupid. Historia laughs and asks her what she’s talking about, to which Ymir says that she’s broken her promise, that she knows she was an idiot and that she’s sorry, so sorry for leaving her behind, but she can’t take back the choice she made. “Live proudly with your head held high, Historia. Make it a life with no regrets.”

Suddenly the music stops and Historia wakes up with tears in her eyes.

Every time I see the hug, I feel warm inside.

Honestly, the food eating is the thing that confuses me the most. I get that she’s pregnant, but why human food? also, if she’s punching her stomach for it to ‘go through’ like she did in the anime, I doubt it’s good for the baby. Maybe.

Oh my, now I want to see that child. Dammit, Ishida, give us a Touka/Uta lovechild, we need it! But the Kaneku/Touka one would also be pretty powerful. I mean, if they get both kagunes and their parents’ looks, they’re good to go. Kaneki’s also smart, so that would be a plus. As long as they don’t get his crippling depression as well.

That would certainly be an interesting turn of events ^^;;;

I bet Kaneki has right about 0 ideas about how to handle a child, much less a screaming baby and even less a teenager going through their rebellious phase.

Holy shit. All along, the perfect cast of Hamilton was hiding in the next generation. Quickly, everyone, get to making babies!! We need them :p At least our questioning about who from TG would make a good Hamilton has been answered hahah An unborn character who might never be born, knowing Ishida. Nice.

Now that, that would be a moment in which my hear would melt. I would start crying while also smiling, and yet I’d be angry for no reason, but it’s HIDEEEEE

HHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIDDDDEEEEEEEE

I’ll get to it tomorrow, I suppose. Hopefully. I like your sister hahah Seems like something I’d do if I liked Bucky more

Yep. I know of the ship. Apparently, it came out of nowhere.

We all have our problems with OCs... You gave them too much angst and I made them overpowered. You still give your characters a shitton of angst, but you seem to know how to have it make more sense, other than being angst for the sake of angst. I hope so, at least.

That miiight be a tiny bit op, despite her not knowing to use them, tho. She’ll learn to use it eventually and then it’ll definitely be a bit op.

Ah, here’s the thing about my OCs. They get created and that’s where it stops for them. I might think up random scenarios with them, but I’ll never write anything with them. Too much of a bother, in my opinion. I’d rather stick to short imagines with other people giving me ideas for them.

Yep, can’t wait to see it ^^

I think Tatsuo would be my ‘I love to hate you’ character hahah Chaotic Neutrals usually do that to me. Chaotic lawful, though, just makes me mad.

The gif is another one of my favourites

Here’s an alternate usage hahah

Once again,

This face can be used in so many situations XD

#evans #submission

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