#but for now i'm posting as is and we'll see what happens
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Okay but, " Young and Beautiful" by Lana del Rey but it's Tony thinking about him and Peter.
Tony's at the point where it's impossible to ignore the fact that he is older than his husband, Peter. He believes that he is holding Peter back from going and experiencing life the way he should be. He sees the social media posts of MJ and her girlfriend going on all these trips around the world and going on adventures together and he feels guilty.
It all started when he gave up iron man. He just couldn't do it anymore. Peter tried acting like he stopped patrolling for a bit, staying in with Tony so the man didn't feel guilty. But, Tony felt and heard Peter get out of bed, suit up, and swing out the window. Tony just stayed quiet about it, he didn't want to start a fight with Peter.
Well, he stayed quiet about it as long as he could. The morning after yet another night where Peter snuck out to patrol, Tony could tell that Peter had gotten hurt pretty badly. Peter was used to being thrown around a bit, but it seemed like every breath hurt the kid. After Peter tried to hide yet another wince, Tony spoke up. " Pete, drop the act and show me the damage".
Peter's eyes snapped to Tony's " What?"
Tony looked at the younger man pointedly. " I'm not oblivious. Every other night about an hour after you think I've fallen asleep, you sneak out of the house to go patrol. You got hurt last night. Stop pretending you don't patrol anymore and show me where you're hurt."
Peter went to speak up in protest before he sighed quietly. He stood up from his place on the couch and pulled off his shirt, revealing a bunch of bruises on his ribs and an area where a slightly blood-stained bandage was wrapped sloppily around his torso. He was fine, his healing factor would have him better in a few days, but that was besides the point.
" Pete. You have to wake me up when this stuff happens. You should tell me when you go patrol... What if something serious happened? Damnit Peter." He said, grabbing his husband's hand and dragging him to his room. He pointed at the bed " Lay down, I'm cleaning you up a bit and then you're going to rest until you're healed. And in the future, you will be telling me when you go patrol."
Before Peter could respond, Tony added " And I don't care if you've been hiding it because I'm not iron man anymore. I know you're younger than me and you don't have to hide that. Hell you should be out living your life with someone your age, not with some old man like me."
Peter looked up at Tony as the man cleaned his wound. " I am living my life exactly how I want to. I love you, Tony, I don't care how old you are or if you can't patrol with me. We'll find other things to do together."
Tony sighed softly, " I love you too, bambino. Now try to get some sleep, you'll heal faster."
Peter slowly nodded off to sleep as Tony finished bandaging his wound.
He walked out of the room, going back to their living room. " But will he still love me when I'm no longer young and beautiful" he said sadly, quoting a song by one of his husband's favorite artists.
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📜 the state of the blog address 5/25/24 📜
hello my lovelies! 💕
I just wanted to give you all a little update on the various things that are going on with the blog at the moment 🥰
1. the last flower children poll has been posted 💐
I'm so glad y'all loved these charming and whimsical little sprites as much as I did ☺️ we've now gone through all the illustrations in the book, so our beloved flower children will be returning to the gardens and fields they call their homes 💐💕
2. 2k follower celebration – "very historical historical fashion polls"
you can read more about this here, but now that the 1k flower children celebration is over, to celebrate 2k followers (which is still absolutely wild to me btw 🤯) I'm going to feature some older fashions. to be completely honest, I have not sourced any of those images yet, but I'm working on it! I will make a separate post when you'll start seeing those on the blog ☺️
3. 3k follower celebration will be flower fairies!
there was overwhelming enthusiasm in this little poll that I did, so in a similar fashion to flower children, we'll be having some flower fairy polls once we reach that milestone! it will likely be a bit until that happens, since we have yet to hit 3k, and because I'll want to wrap up the event for 2k first, but I did want to let y'all know that that's in the works 🥰
4. I'm a bit behind on asks at the moment 😅
mostly wanted to put this in here so that folks who have sent in asks know that I haven't forgotten them!! just wanted you all to know that I treasure the lovely interactions that I get to have with you, and I'm so sorry that it sometimes takes me a while to respond to things 😭 I will be getting around to those within the next couple of days 🥰
I think that's everything I wanted to share with y'all today! all good things, I just wanted to make sure everyone knew what was going on with the blog! 🥰🥰
as always, please feel free to reach out if you have any comments, questions, concerns, or just want to say hi! ☺️💕
much love to you all,
the curator
#the curator speaks#curatorial updates#flower children follower celebration#very historical historical fashion polls
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Human Shield: Part 2
Hunter wasn't ready to lose a brother, not like this. But they're soldiers, so they have to finish the mission, with or without Wrecker.
Part 2 of my "how Wrecker got his scar" fic :)
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Content warning: Temporary Character Death, Blood and Injury, a lot of talk about death
This took me so long! I kept getting distracted. Oops… Hope the angst makes up for the wait!
Inspired by this post by @squad-724
Part 1
Enjoy :)
Read on Ao3
Hunter's heart drops at Wrecker's answer.
He's always hated plan 99. Hunter's not a tubie, he knows that sacrifices are a big part of their lives as soldiers. Even they've heard plenty of stories of clones laying down their lives for the greater good. Clones are expendable, that's just how it is.
Hunter still didn't like giving the act of dying for the mission a name, doesn't like the way doing so has put the thought of self-sacrifice into his brothers heads so prominently.
“What?” Crosshair says. Hunter can hear the way his heart rate skyrockets.
“What do you mean 'plan 99'?” This can't be happening. It can't. Clones die every day, but Hunter's brother's don't. Wrecker can't seriously mean that.
“Self-sacrifice, remember?” Wrecker responds. Hunter knows he means it. Wrecker wouldn't call a plan unless he intended to execute it, wouldn't call plan 99 if he didn't deem it absolutely necessary.
“We know that Wrecker.” Tech says. Hunter glances at him. His eyes are wide behind his goggles.
“You're not dying today, vod.” Hunter says. Wrecker can't die today. “Get your shebs over here, and that's an order.”
Internally, Hunter begs his little brother to listen, to call off what he's planed, to suddenly see a better solution to the problem he's faced with. Instead, Wrecker laughs. The same genuine heartfelt laugh he's always had.
“Can't do that, sarge. Door won't close, and if it doesn't, the fire'll just funnel though the corridor and kill us all.” Wrecker's voice is strained but calm.
Hunter wants to tell Wrecker that he doesn't have to do this, that none of them have to die, that they'll find another way. But Hunter doesn't know that, does he?
“Wrecker.” Hunter says warningly, not sure exactly why. Hunter trusts his vode, trusts Wrecker, but this can't possibly be the only way.
“I can hold them closed.” Wrecker says with a sigh. Hunter shakes his head despite being aware that Wrecker can't see him. “It's what I'm made for.”
“Wrecker, don't!” Hunter shouts, finally regaining enough control of his body to try and run in Wrecker's direction.
Hunter doesn't get far before the whole building shakes. Even with the helmet, the noise is unbearably loud, almost bringing Hunter to his knees. Further down the corridor, the ceiling collapses.
Hunter feels sick, and not because of the way his head hurts. Wrecker's gone. His kih'vod is buried under that rubble, and Hunter could do nothing to stop it from happening. Hunter's vision blurs.
“Hunter we've got company.” Tech's voice wavers ever so slightly as he speaks. Now that Hunter's paying attention, he can hear the steady approach of droids. He can't think about Wrecker now, if he does, he risks wasting Wrecker's sacrifice.
Hunter readjusts the grip he has on his blaster, trying to push down the suffocating emptiness threatening to rise in his chest. Crosshair's still staring at the rubble down the hall. Hunter can see the way his shoulders shake.
“We have to keep moving Cross.” Hunter says, putting a hand on his youngest brother's arm. There's no denying how close the sniper is, was, with Wrecker, even if Crosshair likes to act like they aren't.
“We can't just leave.” He sounds despaired. Hunter wished he knew how to comfort his brother, but that's always been Wrecker's thing. They barely have the time to stand here now, Hunter hasn't got the time to figure out the right thing to say or do.
“We're behind enemy lines. We'll be overrun by droids if we don't.”
Crosshair's head snaps round to look at Hunter. He can feel how intense his gaze is, even through the visor. “We don't leave vode behind.”
“He's gone, Crosshair!” Hunter snaps. He shouldn't let his emotions run free on the battlefield, but he can't stop it this time. “And for nothing if we die here too.”
He grabs Crosshair's arm and starts dragging him. After a few steps, the youngest member of Clone Force 99 start walking on his own again.
As they engage in combat against the approaching droids, it's painfully apparent that they're missing a member. They hardly always fought in a group, but Hunter had planned for Wrecker to be here. His brain seems not to have caught up to the fact that he isn't, and won't ever be again. Hunter keeps trying to spot him, keeps listening out for his heartbeat and heavy breathing as he ploughs through their enemies.
The absence of those rests heavily on Hunter, like it intends to crush his chest. Every time he picks up on it, he's reminded of where his little brother really is.
But they can't stop, don't stop until they're out of enemy territory and back on the Marauder. Hunter has to fight to not let the gravity of the situation consume him as soon as there's a quiet moment.
He and Tech contact the general that gave them the mission, some Chagrian jedi Hunter had never seen before. Hunter can't help but feel some resentment towards the general, despite her not being involved in their brother's death.
As Tech informs the jedi of the data he retrieved, Hunter's barely able to focus. Crosshair didn't even get on the Marauder, still lingering outside.
“The agreed meeting point still stands.” The jedi says. “Can I expect you to arrive on time?”
“Affirmative.” Tech answers, not sounding entirely certain. Hunter wanders off to find Crosshair before Tech's hung up on the jedi.
“What are you doing?” Hunter asks as he comes to a standstill next to his kih'vod.
“We can't leave him Hunter.” Now that Crosshair's helmet is off, Hunter can see he's close to tears. The only thing keeping them from falling is likely the years of harsh training and preparation for a moment like this he's endured. The statement feels a lot like denial.
“Cross, you know he's-”
“I know he's dead, Hunter! You can stop repeating yourself.” Crosshair snaps, face pinched in anger before he turns to look away. “That doesn't mean we have to leave him there, where the seppies can get their filthy hands all over his body. Doesn't mean we need to leave him to rot under rubble in an enemy base.” Crosshair's voice falters more and more as he speaks.
“We'd have to fight our way back in.” Hunter doesn't want to leave Wrecker's body where it is any more than Crosshair, but it's a risk to go back for him.
“I don't give a motla'shebs! We took most of them out, there's just stragglers left.” Crosshair's visibly shaking again. “If you won't come with me, I'll do it alone.”
“If we go back to him, we will be late to the meeting.” Tech says as he descends from the Marauder.
Crosshair's eyes snap to stare at Tech. “Why the kriff would that matter now?”
“Oh no, I agree with you Crosshair. I was merely stating fact.”
With both his brothers advocating to go back, Hunter couldn't bring himself to do the reasonable thing. Not when he so badly wanted to see his little brother at least once more, and to lay him to rest with the respect he deserves. Though Hunter had to admit that he knew little in the ways of burial rites. Tech surely has some information tucked away somewhere, otherwise they'd improvise.
Hunter tries not to think about it too hard as they make their way back to where they firs entered the base. Hopefully there'd be less rubble on that side of the explosion.
There really isn't many droids left. Hunter feels awful for almost deciding against going back for Wrecker's body, just because it's what the rules dictate. They're experimental clone force 99, rules have always been little more than suggestions to them. Hunter doesn't know why he thought now would be the time to starts following them.
The devastation leading up to what used to be the generator room is substantial. The smell of fire and fuel is almost overwhelming. Hunter hopes death came quick and painlessly for their vod.
Hunter can smell the blood long before they get to where Wrecker's body must lie. The silence around the three brothers becomes heavy. Hunter knows they all dread what they'll find. There's no saying how much of their brother will still be recognizable.
Among the bits of twisted metal, Hunter is able to distinguish the remains of the door, dented and warped by the explosion. His eyes watch the glint of something reflective. Nausea twists Hunter's stomach as he recognizes it as a pool of blood, Wrecker's blood. But, that's when he hears it.
A heartbeat so weak, Hunter barely recognized it as such, and wheezed breathing. Hunter's own heart almost stops the second time that day.
“He's alive!” Hunter yells as he tries to find a way to get closer to their brother. First, he just sees an arm poking out from under the door, then Wrecker's head. What's left of the door is laying on top of the rest of their brother. Hunter starts trying to get the weight off of Wrecker.
Blood soaks into his gloves as Hunter drops to the floor next to his little brother. Wrecker may be alive, but barely. If they don't get him out now, it won't stay that way long.
Tech and Crosshair don't need to be told what to do, finding their place next to Hunter with practised efficiency. It isn't lost on Hunter that Wrecker could lift the debris with ease. Wrecker groans when the door is shifted off his chest, but remains unconscious.
“What do we do?” Crosshair's voice cracks. He sounds so lost.
“Stop the bleeding, no matter what.” Tech says, dropping to his knees next to their fallen brother. “We can worry about infection once he's no longer going into hypovolemic shock.”
Now that he's uncovered, Hunter can see the extent of the damage to Wrecker's body. Most of his left side is a torn and bloody mess. Hunter tries not to think about it too hard as helps his brothers pack Wrecker's injuries with bandages. His armor, even his helmet, is badly damaged. Wrecker's face is a particularly dire sight.
They do the best they can under the less than ideal circumstances. Hunter worries it might not be enough. Wrecker's dangerously pale and shivering as they drag him out of the base. With their effort combined, they can move him at a decent speed.
If they'd went after him faster, Wrecker wouldn't be this close to death. Hunter thought Wrecker was dead, so he made a decision based on that fact. But he'd made a mistake, left his kih'vod to bleed out under rubble.
Had Wrecker been conscious as first? Was he lying there in a pool of his own blood, in pain, just waiting for death, waiting for it to be over?
If they lose Wrecker now, it'll be Hunter's fault. He'll never be able to forgive himself.
Wrecker's still out when they put him down on the Marauder's floor, though he's writhing and struggling against them holding him still. Crosshair kneels on the floor, supporting Wrecker's upper body in his lap. Hunter helps his youngest body fix any slipped bandages and add more from the ships medkit as Tech gets the Marauder on the fastest route back to Kamino. Hunter can't help but notice that Tech's flying more careful than he usually does.
Seeing Crosshair hold Wrecker close, the large clone's head limply resting against the sniper's chest, Hunter's reminded of how the two of them had bickered that morning. Hunter hadn't caught all of the disagreement, but it boiled down to Crosshair saying he finds Wrecker's habit of hugging them childish and refusing to do so before the mission. Not a new argument by any means. Crosshair loves to act like he hates any affection coming from his vode.
Hunter wonder's if Crosshair's thinking about the disagreement now too. If Wrecker doesn't make it, that would been the last chance Crosshair had to hug him. Crosshair looks miserable as he keeps readjusting his arms around their dying brother.
“He'll be fine Cross.” Hunter says, barely believing the words himself. Knowing what to say has never been Hunter strong suite.
“You can't know that!” Crosshair hisses. “Look at him Hunter!”
Hunter doesn't say anything again. He takes Wrecker's hand in his. Even through his blacks, Wrecker feels ice cold, especially compared to how he usually runs hot.
“He needs blood.” Hunter can hear how slow Wrecker's heart is beating. The sound isn't comforting in the slightest.
“We've done direct blood transfusion before, what are we waiting for?” Crosshair says, stripping the armor off his arm. Hunter calls for Tech, not trusting himself with this. He knows the theory, but this isn't the moment to test if he's up to the task.
Crosshair makes sure to remind them all of Wrecker's dislike of needles, snapping at Tech to be careful more than once. Hunter can thankfully keep the two of them from starting an argument, reminding them in turn that there's little to no chance of Wrecker waking at the moment. Tech still takes care to firmly tape the the needle to Wrecker's arm once it's in.
None of them speak as they watch Crosshair's blood trickle through the tube connecting him to Wrecker. They almost have to fight Crosshair when Tech tells him he's given enough blood, the di'kut being willing to put his own health at risk to give Wrecker a better chance at survival.
It's not much blood, especially considering the difference in mass between the youngest of the squad, but Wrecker's heart sounds a little better, and his breathing is less erratic. Still, Wrecker's hardly out of the meteor field yet, blood loss being far from his only problem.
“What state is he in, Tech?” Hunter asks.
“Oh he's clearly doing great, can't you tell?” Crosshair snarks before Tech can even open his mouth. Hunter glares at Crosshair, but doesn't react verbally.
“It's hard to say.” Tech adjusts his goggles. There's so much blood smeared on his chest plate, though Hunter can smell that it's on all of them. Tech's white armor just allows it to be more visible. “He has numerous broken bones and his left eye and ear are beyond saving. The med scanner doesn't indicate bleeding in the brain or signs of organ failure, however, it is well documented that portable med scanners aren't always as precise as they should be.”
Frustration crosses Crosshair's face. “So what, that's it? He could be dying and we won't know until it happens?”
“Well, Hunter will be able to tell if Wrecker's heart stills, or he stops breathing. Other than that, yes.” Tech's answer doesn't make the situation feel any less tense. “Preventing further loss of body heat would be ideal. As would keeping him comfortable in general. Though that is less in favour of increasing his chance of survival, and rather to make the situation as peaceful as possible, if he does pass before we make it to Typoca City.” Tech's voice almost gives out towards the end of his statement.
Hunter's chest aches as he squeezes his little brother's hand. Wrecker has to make it. They can't lose him, not like this, not because Hunter made a stupid decision.
They hardly talk the rest of the time, focusing on keeping Wrecker warm and calm. Hunter barely dares to breath too loud, scared he'll miss a change in Wrecker's condition.
It's chaos when they land on Kamino. Crosshair and Tech yell for a medic as Hunter still doesn't dare to do anything more than listen to Wrecker's heart and wheezed breath.
As they watch Wrecker's limp form being transported off on a stretcher, none of the three brother's dare to say a thing. Hunter wouldn't be surprised if his kih'vode are wondering if this is the last they'll see of Wrecker too. They likely won't get an answer to that for hours.
Feeling sick to his stomach, Hunter trudges his way to their barrack. There, all three of them collapse next to each other, incapable of doing anything but cling to one another as the await news of their brother's fate.
#tbb#the bad batch#tbb wrecker#wrecker whump#cw blood#I still have one part planned to kinda wrap things up#though that one might be quite short#tbb fanfiction#my writing
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Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: The Exorcist (TV)
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Marcus Keane/Tomas Ortega
Additional Tags: Angst, Masturbation, The Fucked Up Inside of Marcus Keane's Head, Canon Typical Religious Perspectives
Summary:
Marcus doesn't think of the other man in the room when he touches himself.
It’s not that he believes God will judge him. In the ranks of his sins, this can hardly factor, and he has seen far too much to credit the notion that abiding by God's rules might serve to win back his favor. God is far too vast to have time for such pettiness.
But the demons aren't.
#the exorcist#marcus keane#tomas ortega#fanfic#my writing#so my hand slipped#a while ago when i got briefly obsessed with this show#this was supposed to be the first chapter of something longer#but for now i'm posting as is and we'll see what happens#its literally 500 words and most things should be clear from context#if you want to check it out and havent seen the show#also i highly recommend you go watch it#if you follow me for black sails stuff#this is the ONLY thing that competes with silverflint#in terms of#whatever the fuck these two have going on#it is gayer than gay sex#i will reblog some gifsets in a minute so you can picture them#hm this has been a weird day NIGHT EVERYBODY
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rip gambit you will be missed 😔
Don't even know what to say tbh.
For those that don't know, the big State of the Game article came out detailing incoming changes and adjustments and all the big stuff. Gambit was mentioned! But at what cost. Basically, they are ceasing any kind of support for Gambit. What we have now is what it is. We will get the Dreaming City map back in TFS and they will add Shadow Legion and Lucent Hive as enemy factions in TFS. That's all.
Full text:
As many of you have noticed, we’ve been quiet on Gambit since last year’s overhaul that launched alongside The Witch Queen. In that revamp, the team made significant changes across five categories in Gambit: core activity fundamentals, Primeval tuning, invasions, ammo economy, and rewards. Unfortunately, these updates didn’t move the needle for player engagement. Although we know our Gambit fans mostly care about new or returning maps, this is an area of the game with lower engagement that would take resources away from more popular parts of the game to shore up.
While we don’t have plans to dedicate more resources to significantly transform Gambit, we do have a few updates planned for the year of The Final Shape. These include porting the Cathedral of Scars map and its beautiful Dreaming City setting into the latest version of Destiny 2, as well as adding the Shadow Legion and Lucent Hive enemy types.
I don't know how to tell you this Bungie, but the reason "engagement is low" in Gambit is because Gambit sucks. Ever since half of it was removed with DCV, it just sucked. It has no variety, the gameplay is largely busted, it's not sufficiently updated, ammo changes suck, invasion cycle sucks (why is the enemy even getting a portal when their Primeval is at 5% health and the other team is still in mote collecting phase is beyond me), there are no cool armour sets to chase (just look at Iron Banner and Trials stuff, imagine dedicated cosmetics) and finally there are simply no weapons that are worth anything. Both Vanguard and Crucible have more weapons and also adept versions. There is zero reason to go into Gambit without major changes to Gambit. And now with the further changes to how playlists and challenges will work, there will be even less reason to go into Gambit. Observe:
Before then, we’re making Gambit entirely optional to maximize your rewards unless you’re looking for a piece of gear that’s specific to the mode. Gambit will continue to serve as a source of Exotic engrams via weekly challenges, though as we mentioned above, you’ll be able to complete all your weekly challenges in any ritual you’d like starting in Season 22. If you want to stick to Vanguard or Crucible challenges without touching Gambit, now you can.
We’re also reducing the number of Gambit-specific Seasonal Challenges starting in Season 22, so players won’t need to bank motes to be able to earn that big purse of Bright Dust for completing nearly every challenge in the Season. Finally, we’re adding Fireteam Matchmaking to Gambit next Season, which will replace the Freelance node and should result in faster, better matchmaking by combining both Gambit playlists. We’ll keep an eye on reception and player engagement after these additions take place, and we hope you’ll visit ‘ol Drifter next Season to get your hands on his new Void Machine Gun.
Ngl, but I don't think anyone besides like a total of 6 people will play Gambit next season. The incentive to go in there is completely removed. You won't even have to go in there for pinnacles or for challenges. The Void Machine Gun will not be enough of an incentive because the chance of that gun being better than two recently available craftable Void Machine Guns (Commemoration and Retrofit Escapade) is very low. And besides, once you get it at the end of your first match, you can leave Gambit forever.
This is the feedback loop that just reinforces the idea that people don't like Gambit. And I mean. Who would at this point. I'm pretty sure that if Crucible had stayed the same as it was at the start of Beyond Light, engagement would be low there too. But you know. Crucible has received major updates pretty much every season since with multiple new modes, several Trials overhauls, Iron Banner overhaul, competitive overhaul, new armours and weapons added and YES, even new maps. God forbid even 5% of these resources went into Gambit.
Anyway, this is the whole section about Gambit in 6500 words. It's basically a "you guys aren't playing this so we're doing the bare minimum of keeping it in the game as is, no new work will be done on it ever." Thanks I guess.
And for the record, something I also added while having a rant in my discord, I want to make it clear that I don't want anyone to spiral into a Bungie hate train. Even for this. I understand perfectly well what's the community attitude towards Gambit and what it's been for years now. People just don't like it and they're not incentivised to like it and they're actively encouraged to hate it. Spending resources into a game mode on the hope that maybe you can change people's minds would be insanity. Like, the amount of change Gambit would need to MAYBE start appealing to gamers would be beyond any reasonable time and resources Bungie can put in. And if you could guarantee that people would love and play Gambit then, fine. But you can't. Most likely, even if major changes happened, people would still just do their weekly stuff and bail. It's simply not worth it. In order for people to like it, it needs to be completely and thoroughly overhauled in a way that would need more time and effort than the entire Light subclass overhaul and it's just not a reasonable expectation, nor is it guaranteed to work. So I get it.
I'm still disappointed and annoyed about it because I believe it wasn't given a fair chance at all. I also know how good it can be and how Gambit Prime could've been improved upon over the years if they tried. Instead, it got removed and that was honestly the death sentence for Gambit. It's unfortunate. It's my favourite game mode that could've been so much better was it given even a fraction of attention of Crucible.
I'll still be playing it. You will find me in the Gambit queue waiting for 2 hours to find 7 other lunatics to play with, don't worry about it. But I'm absolutely incredibly sad about them being basically forced to axe the potential of the whole game mode that is incredibly creative and fits with the type of game Destiny is perfectly.
There's other interesting stuff in the article and some upcoming really cool improvements and changes to the game. But if you're a fan of Gambit in any capacity, this is a death certificate for the mode. I suggest coming to terms with it quickly because Bungie changing their minds about this is highly unlikely.
#destiny 2#gambit#ask#long post#says 'don't know what to say' at the start. writes an essay. FHKSJHFKJS#i won't go too much into it outside of this. we all know what this means no need to beat the dead horse#i'll still play it and the mode is still there but i expect a drop in quality and population significantly#the issues we have will never be addressed nothing will ever be fixed. we'll get a 5th map (returning) in 6 months and that's it#yay. I guess.#don't think there will be anyone in the playlist anymore by that point so I'm not sure why even bother with that alone#but still. if that does happen at least new people will be able to see that map now. it was very pretty#unfortunately not good gameplay wise. but at least it will help to not get deep six 17 times in a row#anyway. sad situation for gambit enjoyers. please don't turn into crucible bros to harass devs though
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Zutara Probably Would Have Been Canon in Season 4 – The Masterpost
| [Intro.] |
If you’ve been around or within the Avatar fandom for any period of time you have probably, one way or another, become aware of one of the most intense shipping wars not just of any children’s show, but possibly just in general, one that is well over a decade old by now, approaching two.
Katara and Aang (Kataang), though canon, are often criticized for being one-sided, bad for each of the characters, and rushed. The creators of Avatar though – Mike & Bryan (collectively known as the entity ‘Bryke’) – have stated in the past that Kataang “was in the DNA of the [show] from the start.” (x)
Statements like the above are one of the reasons Zuko and Katara (Zutara) fans have been labelled ‘conspiracy theorists’ when they claim things that contradict Bryke: namely, that Zutara as a pairing was not only a serious consideration during the show’s run, but the likely outcome if the show had continued on for another season, which it seems it almost did.
(This hypothetical ‘Book 4’ was, for a long time, considered a Zutarian conspiracy theory in itself.)
But let’s back up.
How did these so-called conspiracy theories start?
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| [Intro. To The Rumours + Who Is Aaron Ehasz?] |
For a long time, the only thing that Zutara fans could latch onto were rumours. People who claimed to have worked at Nickelodeon, worked in the artistic community and knew things, met a writer in person, etc. This may not sound promising on its face, but the thing is, most of these rumours were consistent. Most of their content concerned the one-time possibility of season 4, and one man in particular: Avatar’s head writer Aaron Ehasz.
We’ll go into those rumours in depth in a second. For right now, here's a little teaser: (x)
But first, who is Aaron Ehasz (& ex-wife Elizabeth Welch) and what were his contributions to the development of Avatar?
[Who Are the Ehaszs, and Why Does Everyone Bring Them Up?] -- (x)(x)
Bonus: (x) (Note that the poster is Giancarlo Volpe btw, another writer on Avatar.)
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| [The Main Rumour Sources – Tumblr Blogs ‘Kataraandzuko’ & ‘Zephyrita’] |
Now we can get to the rumours themselves. The two main sources are both now-deactivated tumblr blogs. ‘Kataraandzuko’ is the first one we’re going to talk about. This person claimed to be an assistant writer/intern on Avatar Books 2/3 with inside knowledge of what went on behind the scenes in the writer’s room.
Meet ‘Kataraandzuko’: (x)
Zephyrita, similarly, claimed to be someone who interned and studied at Nickelodeon Studios in 2007 as an animation color stylist (according to (x)). It seems significant to mention that Zephyrita also claimed to not actually be a Zutara shipper.
(Besides reblogs, a good amount of her original posts can be found on the Wayback Machine. I took screenshots of a few of them and posted them to my blog individually with the links to the rest underneath.)
Meet ‘Zephyrita’: (x)
By the way, while I don’t know when the blogs were first started or when the first rumours concerning season 4 were posted, they seem to have been around since at least late 2015-2016. It’s hard to tell with the blogs and original posts being deactivated, but that’s the earliest I’ve seen. (If anyone sees anything earlier, let me know.) This will become important later.
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| [Controversy: (A conversation I had with…)] |
Now, I said we were going to talk about Kataraandzuko first and the post that we’re going to talk about specifically is this one: (x)
In it, Kataraandzuko claims to have had a conversation with Aaron Ehasz in Philadelphia. Why they were both in Philadelphia is not stated in the post. According to what Kataraandzuko wrote, Aaron seems to strongly imply that he had wanted to explore a romantic relationship between Zuko and Katara. This supposed conversation was turned into a tumblr post and written down in a style reminiscent of an interviewer and interviewee.
Being the only well-known rumour post to be written this way meant it, kataraandzuko themselves, and all the rumours generally would come under a lot of fire when Everything changed when Aaron Ehasz attacked Aaron Ehasz himself came out and said this: (x) in September, 2018.
With Aaron himself basically shooting down the idea that a season 4 (and, by proxy, Zutara) was ever seriously considered or planned, people who had viewed Zutara fans’ theories as nothing more than wild, imaginative conspiracies by desperate shippers felt like they had been proved right: (x)
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| [Other Rumours] |
And yet, rumours persisted.
[This (x) for the record, is kataraandzuko’s follow-up post to their ‘Conversation I had with Aaron Ehasz in Philadelphia’ post. I’ve reblogged a number of their other posts too. But fine, Aaron said the interview was fake, so let’s disregard everything ‘kataraandzuko’ said for now.]
Here’s someone who claims to have been present at a class that Aaron gave a lecture at at UC Berkeley: (x)(x)
(this class seems to have been real – here’s a link to people talking about it 12 years ago; the link on the page appears to have changed though: (x) )
Here’s another post concerning that class, though I’m not sure if the person they’re talking about who attended is actually the same person as above. (x)
Other posts from Reddit, 4chan, & Deviantart: (x)(x)(x)
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| [Evidence Against Kataang] |
[Series Bible] Of course, rumours aren’t really ‘evidence.’ And, while it’s hard to find evidence for something that never happened, it’s not hard to take a look at Avatar’s original series bible, or series outline by Bryke, and see that, though indeed, the series bibles only outlines three seasons, it also doesn’t outline endgame Kataang or suggest it being anywhere near ‘the DNA of the show.’ In fact, Aang and Katara & Sokka separate at the end of this version, with the latter two returning home and Aang going off to search for airbenders. (x)
[“A 50/50 Chance”] Off the record, Bryke even seemed to admit themselves that there might have been a back and forth regarding who exactly was going to end up with who. See here (x) an account of a Kataang fan who thanked Bryke at a comic con, only to be told: “Well, it was a 50/50 chance.“
[M. Night Interview] This was confirmed by a third party as well. ~Certain~ movies he’s made may not have lived up to their expectations but I see no reason why M. Night Shyamalan would lie when he says that at the time he talked to Mike and Bryan regarding a potential live action movie, there were a lot of things that hadn’t been figured out yet, including “who Katara was going to end up with.” (x)
And so, with or without a direct confirmation of season 4 by Aaron (when the world needed him most, he vanished), it seemed there had still been wiggle-room at some point in time for the potential of ~certain things~ to have, indeed, been under consideration, fourth season or not.
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| [Aaron Confirms on Twitter] |
BUT THEN.
100 Years passed and my brot—
On April 1, 2019, Aaron emerged, as if from an iceberg, to share some thoughts on an Azula redemption arc (x), confirm this was not an April Fool’s joke, and to state the following: “Yes, I always believed there would be a 4th season.” (x)
Zutara fans, realizing they had been right about this, and wondering what other strongly associated theory they might have been right about, rejoiced: (x)
One half of the infamous Bryke, Bryan Konietzko, did not. And, in fact, indirectly called Aaron a liar: (x)
And, It is worth mentioning, in the interest of giving everyone the full picture, that Bryan is not the only one to question Aaron recently. In late 2019, allegations came out of Aaron creating a sexist and toxic work environment. (x)
(Personally, I think your mileage may very on how serious or substantial you may find these claims.)
But with regards to the topic at hand, the Season 4 claims, someone on a Reddit thread here (x) recounts: “Also I wasn't really sure where to put this but Jean Paul Bondy, an artist who worked on ATLA, jumped in AE's twitter thread to say ‘I don’t remember this at all. Obviously I wasn’t party to discussion you three had. But I was always under the impression we were only doing the three.’”
Just recently, in 2023, Jack De Sena (Sokka’s VA) also answered a question about season 4 at a con: ((x) -- 27:30)
“I’ve heard subsequently that there was like, conversations about season 4 and stuff, but, at the time, it definitely felt like we were only doing three. Like, I was being told at the time like, they had conceived of this like, closed arc, three season… thing. So, while they were planting some seeds for like, here’s other story elements that we could explore in other areas when we have the time, it definitely felt like, ‘okay, this is, this is the journey we’re going on together, it has reached a logical conclusion.’ So, it did feel, to us while recording it, quite final and complete.”
“I was always told it was a set three,” confirms Zachary Tyler Eisen (Aang’s VA)
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| [Discussion] |
So, in a sense, we’re back where we started. Though, I would question how much, exactly, artists and voice actors, who I would assume typically only start working on scripts that have already been decided on long beforehand, would really know about any behind the scenes discussions among the writers about potential trajectories and arcs for the show as a whole (and how long those would take to play out).
And Jack did mention that he’s heard now that there were “conversations about season 4” – I’m assuming he’s heard that from more trustworthy sources than internet rumours. And, if he did, then that directly contradicts Bryan seemingly saying he never had the slightest interest in making a fourth season and was always firm on that.
After looking at everything, it seems clear to me that, to the direct contradiction of a few rumours on my blog, Avatar was probably NOT pitched as a 4 (or more) season show. I do think it was probably pitched as three. But I also think, after the show was greenlit or as it was going on, Aaron saw the potential for more seasons and pushed for them. Maybe those discussions didn’t make it very far out of the writer’s room. Maybe there was a point in time where Aaron felt he had been successful in convincing Bryke to go for a fourth season. Or maybe he always felt like he’d be able to get them there eventually. Maybe the movie finally put an end to any of Aaron’s hopes. I don’t know.
But, it’s kind of irrelevant. If the ‘conspiracy’ is that Aaron was setting up the show for a Zutara ending in season 4, then it doesn’t matter how close, in reality, we were to a fourth season. What really matters is whether or not Aaron thought there’d be one.
“Yes, I always believed there would be a 4th season”
And it seems he did.
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| [‘Zephyrita’, ’Tizuyan’ & the Smoking Gun] |
Now, you may have noticed that there was someone mentioned before that we never talked about: Zephyrita. I waited because I’ve noticed something that I’ve never seen anybody else talk about, and decided it needed its own section.
Zephyrita was, of course, one of the two main bloggers that claimed to have worked/interned on Avatar back in the day and posted things they supposedly remembered from behind the scenes, things that all supported the Season 4/Zutara theory.
Given that Aaron indirectly called out the other main blog as a fraud, causing us to have to disregard them for now, you may wonder why anyone should view Zephyrita’s credibility as any different. Here’s actually a post of someone arguing with her about this and Zephyrita’s response: (x)
“’You can’t prove you worked at Nick!!’
What type of proof do you need? Why do I have to prove something as insignificant as this anyway? Like, working there isn’t some exclusive club and I didn’t write an entire episode, I just interned and studied there but I did get to talk a lot with the staff. I wanted to intern at CN but I ended up with Nick in the end. This was all back in 2007 and I’ve been working in advertising since then. You want me to just ring up Tim Hendricks and ask him how he is after almost 10 years? […] I would post my studio pass as ‘proof’ but that contains confidential info.”
So let’s get into why I believe Zephyrita.
(x) – This is a post where Zephyrita is asked what some of Aaron’s ideas were that didn’t make it into the show. Most of her response has to deal with Zuko and Katara, but it also includes this little tidbit about Aang at the end:
“Aang would leave on a self-searching journey after feeling the consequences of energybending and getting jealous over how close Zuko and Katara had become.”
In another post (x), she shares “my friend yan no longer has tumblr because people on this site are RIDICULOUS but she told she wanted to put in some extra info about the ideas that ehasz had:”
‘Yan’ I’m thinking is another deactivated user – ‘Tizuyan’ – who also used to post about the unexplored ideas Aaron had. (Admittedly, I’m not sure how they claimed to know any of it.)
But Zephyrita shares the ideas that ‘Yan’ supposedly gave her, including this one: “zuko and katara develop an understanding and bond that the other characters can not comprehend. they grow very close and sokka starts to suspect there is something going on between them. aang starts feeling jealous but tries to hide these feelings (ehasz said he would start feeling “weird” lmao). this would play a part of his growing darkness.”
In yet another post (x), Tizuyan herself writes “They would have fit very well within the possible Book 4 where Aang became “dark” and traveled back to the Air Temples for solace (where he examines himself, and finds a bunch of flying bison + winged lemur)”
So, to summarize, there would have been consequences to energy bending that would have caused a growing darkness in Aang. And as said before, all these posts are from around 2015-2016, if you go back and look at their earliest, still-existing notes.
Why is this significant?
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It is significant because in 2019, after confirming he always thought there’d be a fourth season on twitter, Aaron Ehasz did an interview (x) where he talked a little bit more about what his ideas were for Season 4, beyond an Azula redemption arc. Obviously, there’s nothing in this interview about Zutara. But. But. There is this:
“Ehasz reaffirmed his earlier stated plans for a longer arc for Azula but also divulged additional details. One plotline would have followed up on Aang taking away Fire Lord Ozai’s bending at the end of the third season.
‘My feeling about that was like there’s always a cost, right? There’s always some balance. You can’t just be like I’m the Avatar, taking your powers away. It’s a great power, but part of it is you just took all this evil into you. To take it away from someone else you’re holding onto it to protect the world.’
For Aang that would have been an incredible burden and something Ehasz would have wanted to see him deal with.
‘The story I wanted to tell with Aang was about him struggling with taking some of that inside and probably a considerable amount of anger and guilt and big feelings. By the way, guess who would be the best person to have a mini vacation with? It’s Zuko! Someone who’s processed a lot of anger on his own, right?’”
So… basically… there would have been consequences to energy bending that would have caused a growing darkness in Aang.
It matches up perfectly.
And not only that, but you’ll notice in the interview he also mentions wanting to focus on Iroh and his spiritual transformation, and mentions something relating to the potential for existing airbenders. This also matches up well with other things that were written in the latter two tumblr posts linked above.
So, what are the possible explanations? Liars/delusional shippers on tumblr who were falsely claiming to have insider knowledge on Avatar just so happening to have hit on some of the exact same season 4 plot points as the head writer, 3-4 years before season 4 was even a thing that had been acknowledged publicly? Aaron Ehasz trolling the internet and coming across these theories and then repeating them as if they had been his own ideas for… some purpose?
Or that maybe some of these blogs had been telling the truth?
This is why I called this section ‘the smoking gun’ – I believe that Aang can save t- that DenofGeek interview, along with those old rumour posts give credence to everything else Zephyrita/Tizuyan had to say. (And we’ll get back to ‘kataraandzuko’ later.)
Link to Zephyrita’s posts and comments: (x). The only other post of mine that I know Tizuyan appears on is this one: (x)
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| [Zutara Evidence – External and Textual] |
And there’s more concrete evidence than just rumours. We’ve already gone over the ‘hard’ evidence against the idea that Kataang was planned from the start, but up until now we haven’t gone over the evidence that exists to support Zutara specifically.
First, here’s just a post (x) showing, besides what we’ve already gone over, how Zutara was teased in some of the promotional materials, as well as some comments (including the ‘Avatar Extras’) made by some other writers on the show, further confirming what Bryke once privately acknowledged to a fan – I’m not sure if the chance was exactly 50%, but it seems it was definitively higher than 0.
And, it seems, high enough that little bits of foreshadowing (or…potentially, a major amount of foreshadowing, depending on your view) did make it into the show itself.
Much has been made of the parallels that exist between the ‘Cave of Two Lovers’/’Crossroads of Destiny’ episodes, namely the two lovers with a red and blue color scheme from opposite sides of a war that come together in a cave of glowing crystals… and the two characters with a red and blue color scheme from opposite sides of a war… that come together in a cave of glowing crystals.
Here’s a few posts that break this down in depth: (x) (x) (x)
And here’s just another little piece of external evidence, another comment by a writer – and actually the writer of ‘The Cave of Two Lovers’: (x)
(I noticed he also mentions the series bible saying Zuko and Katara were supposed to end up together??? Yeah, I don’t know what that’s about. Make of it what you will.)
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| [Bryke Being Nasty to Zutarians] |
^^Is it necessary for me to write this section? No.
But, in a way, it’s what led to my interest in this. I’ve said before that if Mike and Bryan had just been normal adults about all this, said that Zutara was a thing that was considered, that could have happened but didn’t, respected their friendship/bond in canon, and just said to all the Zutara fans, “sorry it didn’t go your way this time; hope you can still enjoy the ending anyway!” we wouldn’t have a problem. I would have just thought it was a shame and missed opportunity, and then moved on with my life and not really thought about it ever again.
It's the apparent lying and immaturity and seeming… mean-spirited-ness (?) that gets me. I don’t understand it.
In a rumour from Tizuyan ((x) - this is the second tizuyan post that I linked at the end of the second to last section) she writes: “Bryke despise Zutara.”
This would certainly explain why Zuko and Katara hardly ever seem to have positive interactions in any of the material beyond Avatar’s original series, that is if they even interact at all.
(See Bryan’s out-of-nowhere response to the neutral question, “Can we expect a reunion for the returning characters from The Last Airbender [in Legend of Korra]?” which was:
“As far as a date night between Katara and Zuko, I think you are going to have to stick to the fan art for that." (x) (Not sure if there was any more to this answer or not; I can’t find the original interview, though I know I remember seeing it way back when.)
It would also explain the contents of this rumour (courtesy of Zephyrita) (x) regarding the writing, or re-writing, of ‘The Southern Raiders’ episode.
And it would explain Bryan’s infamous, “Come on kids! ‘Zutara’ never would have lasted! It was just dark and intriguing” comment. (x)
What it wouldn’t explain is the even more infamous video that Bryke debuted at 2008 San Diego Comic Con, and which Bryan (who really seems to be the main instigator in all of this, apparently) has since reposted to his own tumblr account: (x)
You know, the one where Bryke mock Zutara fans with their own fanart and say that “Women who think that Zuko and Katara should be together will forever have doomed relationships.” Yeah.
I have no further comments on it other than what’s already been written in the reblogs linked above.
(And all this is all the more frustrating when Bryan himself seems to have had a slight change of heart when it comes to the ‘DNA of the show’ and writes in late 2014 in a post on The Legend of Korra: “Personally, at that point I didn’t want Korra to have to end up with someone at the end of series. We obviously did it in Avatar, but even that felt a bit forced to me.” (x) (Like, HUH?! Since when?!)
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| [Aaron Ehasz Again + Final Thoughts On The Kataraandzuko “Interview”] |
Meanwhile, Aaron himself painstakingly tends to avoid discussing Zutara, unless it’s brought up to him directly, in which case he usually just gives a wishy-washy answer about how he tries not to actively ship any characters. Though, we will go into an interview that’s slightly more interesting than this in a little bit.
First, I must bring to everyone’s attention a video that it seems no one else has noticed, as the post only had 4 notes on it at the time of writing this. (x)
Here is Aaron Ehasz at a comic con in 2006, which I believe would be sometime before season 2 had finished airing, showing the audience various ships from the show (most of them ridiculous) before at the end getting to Maiko (called Maizu), Kataang, and lastly (which I feel is significant)… Zutara.
This really appears to me to be Aaron showing the audience the ‘serious ships’ under the guise of this being just some funny game, and using the strength of the cheers from the crowd as a way to gauge interest for a potential endgame ship. Either for his own purposes… or for the purpose of possibly convincing someone else. I interpreted this video this way even before I just re-watched it while writing this post and realized that Aaron actually says this directly:
“We really want to hear what you have to say. I want you to know you have a lot of influence and power right now… ‘cause your, your cheers or boos will really… affect it.”
And I think it might make sense to combine this with the rumours here (x) about the supposed lecture at Berkeley where Aaron once flippantly remarked that Zutara couldn’t happen because it “would have made the six year olds cry” and the rumours by jhenne-bean herself, the one who claimed to have been at that lecture, who gives more context here (x):
“GURL IT WAS TOTALLY 50/50 even during the last season.
Actually, Nick execs pushed Kataang.
Because without it (according to one of the head writers that came and spoke to my class last semester) the “six year olds would cry.” Obviously that’s not the sole reasoning behind their decisions, but the intended demographic did sway the final outcome.”
(So, based on all this, I’m thinking that Aaron was probably a little disappointed in that video above when the Zutara cheers didn’t overpower the Kataang ones. [So am I, Aaron. So am I.])
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Now, the only actual filmed interview with Aaron Ehasz about Avatar that I know of is this one: (x) in 2019, where he’s asked questions by fans. Yes, Zutara is brought up, though the surprising part is it’s seemingly at Aaron’s own prompting. For that reason and others I find this interview to be very interesting; I actually did a breakdown of it here (x), which I encourage everyone to consider.
If you’ve read through that breakdown, or just watched the video in question, you will have seen that the “fake” interview from before (x) was once again brought up. I put the word ‘fake’ in quotes because that’s how Aaron appeared to refer to it in the interview – with air quotes. And so now it’s time for my speculation on this “fake” interview:
I think it’s fairly clear that Aaron does not want (or, for some reason feels unable to (?)) speak freely regarding his opinions on how the relationships of Avatar did (or did not) play out. I think it’s safe to say he has avoided saying anything ‘on the books’ that would place him at odds with Bryke (though that post about M Night wanting to focus on season 4 and Bryke wanting to focus on the movie cut it pretty close) or put him on a definitive side of the shipping war, one way or another.
That’s why it makes sense to me that a rumour on the internet that wasn’t just any rumour, but was written in such a way so that it looked like an official *interview*, with Aaron’s name appearing before statements supposedly attributable to him and everything, would be something he’d want to make sure everyone knew was not actually official. If that conversation between kataraandzuko and Aaron actually happened, he would have believed it to be, at the time, a private conversation. He never would have intended for the person he was talking to to post their conversation and make it look like he said these things on the official record.
So, yeah, despite Aaron calling that post out specifically, I think it’s still plausible that that conversation could have actually happened and that kataraandzuko wasn’t lying. Her (?) original tags even say to take it with a grain of salt since it was written from memory.
And notice the line, “I wanted Aang to defeat Ozai and go through some emotional turmoil after taking the Fire Lord's bending.” Sound familiar?
Here’s another variation of one of kataraandzuko’s posts from before (x) where they talk more in depth about being an intern at Nick and what they saw behind the scenes of Avatar, even admitting, “Haha, it’s not hard getting an internship at Nickelodeon. They’re not strict and they accepted me on my first attempt. You just have to be a university student with a lot of motivation.”
(And witness at the end of the post another defensive-Bryke-Bryan example.)
Could all their posts be lies? Sure. But they always seemed credible enough to me. And given everything else we’ve gone over, can you really say anything they posted sounds all that crazy?
So, for your consideration, here’s my tag of all ‘kataraandzuko’s posts: (x)
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| [Summary of All Rumours] |
Also, for your consideration, now that we’ve got all the context behind us, is this post which lists every major piece of gossip about what season 4 would have included had Bryke the universe allowed it to exist: (x)
And a post which I think perfectly encapsulates everything here and my final stance on it: (x)
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...And so. We should be all caught up now.
I hope this post will be useful to anyone who’s confused about the little bits and pieces of things you might have come across or heard regarding season 4 or zutara or Aaron Ehasz or supposed conspiracies. (Or to anyone who just got tired of seeing everyone else, confused, talking about it this way, without the full context.)
If there’s anything major that you feel I missed here, feel free to let me know and I’ll consider adding it in. Otherwise, enjoy the show, enjoy your ship, and I hope you enjoyed reading. Goodbye, everybody! 😊
#Zutara#zukoxkatara#Zuko x Katara#Avatar#Avatar: The Last Airbender#the masterpost#I can't believe I missed posting this in time for Zutara month by two days#I say 'goodbye' at the end of this because now that I've posted it I'm kind of done with this blog#so don't bother following this account I probably won't post anything else beyond today#I've said all I really wanted to say on the topic; though we'll see what happens in a year or so when that adult Gaang movie comes out
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I finally remembered to upload the drawing I did a while back based on this post from @hoofpeet ! It was too fun an idea to not draw it :)
#archen#archen pokemon#pokémon#dinosaur train#dinosaurs#my art#digital art#post-based drawing#birds#bird art#dinosaurs are just prehistoric birds and archen has feathers so I'm counting it#for now#we'll see what happens once I have more birds and dinos on this blog
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Desperately trying to make sense of Alex's motivations in Season Two and you know, I do eventually have to wonder if maybe Alex wasn't actually lying in the majority of those tapes.
Like, we tend to assume that Alex's motivations have been a consistent throughline since the college years, but do we actually know that that's the case? Do we know for sure that Alex was acting in deliberate, calculated ways in 2006; or could it be that he's telling the Truth on those olds tapes when he says he's blacking out and can't remember what's happening to anyone? After all, if we're assuming that Season 2 Alex's motivations are the exact same as his motives in Season 3, then it doesn't make any sense at all that he spend months working with Jay to try to find Amy; Season 3 Alex would have attempted to kill Jay like, on sight just to get things over with as quickly as possible and contain the spread of contamination as best as he could.
But, maybe, if Alex really had been separated from Amy after the events of the 04-04-10 tape, and if he really doesn't know where she is, then maybe that could make things start to make more sense. Maybe he really had been watching Jay's channel, and seeing Jay start going through the same things he went through in college without things devolving into violence and disappearances, and wondered if things maybe could play out differently this time. Maybe he really did send that tape to Jay to ask him for help, maybe he really was just trying to find Amy.
But then, instead of actually being helpful, Jay makes it extremely clear that he's a lot more interested in stalking Alex than he is in finding Amy. Alex asked for help, and instead there's a bunch of masked dudes on Jay's heels that keep attacking him, Jay is breaking into his house, stealing his things, leading the Operator right to him all over again, keeps trying to get other people (namely: Jessica -- if Alex is being honest when he says that his call reassuring her that Amy had been found was an effort to make Sure she stayed away from everything that was happening) involved; and instead of anything getting better, instead of anyone finding Amy, things are just getting worse all over again.
It's not until after the incident at the tunnel that things seem to start rapidly devolving. Rather than a calculated attempt to finally follow through with his need to curb the spread of contamination, this is very clearly an outburst of rage and terror. Alex's "I told you not to follow me" line in conjunction with Jay speculating that Alex didn't know who that guy was, to me, pretty firmly seems to speak to Alex having mistaken that stranger for Jay. From his point of view, Alex knows that Jay and totheark know where he live, have broken in before, he suspects that Jay stole a key to make it easier to get into his house, and he's been followed on the daily for months -- Alex is sitting at the tunnel because he doesn't know where else he can go without being constantly surveilled, hunted, and assaulted. And instead of getting a moment by himself to breathe, Jay followed him out there all over again (it feels like Alex looks directly at the camera in Jay's footage of him from this day; he knew for a fact that Jay was there), and then to make matters worse now 'Jay' won't even keep his distance anymore.
So Alex lashes out. And it's not until afterwards that he looks down and finally recognizes that this wasn't Jay -- it was someone completely innocent. Things have finally reached the low point he was at in college all over again; maybe even worse this time. If Alex doesn't remember attacking anyone in college, but he was at least partially conscious of it this time, then things have reached an entirely new rock bottom, they've reached an absolute point of no return.
He has no idea what happened to Amy, and he's spent months trying to find her with no hint of where she could be; he doesn't know where Jay actually is or what additional trouble he could be causing at this point; he does know that now innocent people are getting caught in the crossfire (in regards to the stranger in the tunnel, and also Jessica now that Jay has her phone number, and the untold number of people Jay got involved when he started posting videos to the Marble Hornets channel); things are spiraling out of control and there's no one left to ask for help. The situation isn't getting better, it's getting worse; things aren't getting easier to handle, they're just getting more out of hand; the negative impact is spreading and who knows how much further it can still go?
So, Alex decides to go scorched earth. He disfigures the body with the rock either to hide evidence or to make sure the guy would actually stay dead and not just get back up to start his own cycle of contamination in a few years. He tries to give Jay one last chance to back off, and Jay instead admits he's been talking to Jessica, acts obstinate and lies about not having Alex's spare key, and then breaks into Alex's house a second time (minimum). If Alex doesn't stop him now, who will? Alex met with Jay planning to kill the others, and then himself, so he could put a stop to this once and for all and keep things from getting any worse than they already were.
Maybe it makes a lot more sense if, rather than being a strangely incomprehensible detour on what should have been a straight path, the events of Season Two were the breaking point that put Alex on that path to begin with.
#N posts stuff#idk!!! I've been thinking a lot lately about the tendency to take Characters at Face Value; when they tell us things we tend to#automatically believe them despite what evidence we might have to the contrary. & like when it comes to deciphering what#went down during the college film project it's mostly totheark that posits that Alex was Definitely Lying and Definitely Acting on Purpose#(even Jay is largely ambivalent - wondering which way it leans and basically saying it could go either way)#but. do we KNOW that they know that? Do we Know that they're Right when they claim that? Or are they just Assuming based off#of their own rage and animosity towards Alex due to what happened? Do we Know for Sure that Alex Was Lying in s1?#i don't know if we do!! And so without Knowing that for sure; how can we speak to Alex's motivations in season one OR season two?#now TO BE CLEAR: I am not saying this in an attempt to claim that Alex is somehow completely innocent of all guilt and that like.#Jay is the 'Real Antagonist' of the series - not at all my intention. this is just More of my usual 'look. Everyone in this series is#all kinds of Morally Grey; no recurring character in this series is free of guilt they ALL have unique fatal flaws & trends towards#antagonism that makes things worse and dooms them all' shtick - a la 'everyone Thinks they're doing the Right Thing but No One Is'#BUT i Am wondering if this Does help to like. clear up some of the ambiguity/uncertainty of Season Two - and even Season One - and#lets the series as a whole read a little bit clearer? idk i know that Jay does Claim to think that Alex was bullshitting him#the whole time & was Actually planning on tying up loose ends the whole time but AGAIN it doesn't make Sense he'd wait so long#idk - Am i making sense? does any of this track? i'm trying to figure it out; i am open to comments on the subject to help#i haven't rewatched season 3 yet today and so maybe there's stuff in there that contradicts this whole theory lmao but i'm taking a break#and just posting this anyway; we'll see what happens lol#marble hornets#mh lb
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good news!
I am officially doing febuwhump this year :)
I can't say for sure how many prompts I will be doing, but I did finish the first one today and I'll probably have the second one done by the time I go to sleep tonight, so…hopefully it'll end up being more than 2 but we'll see?
but I'm excited! writing has been really difficult lately, as I've said before, and I'm hoping that doing this will break me out of this funk.
#pandora's ramblings#also I'm once again going to post-tpm era for the first prompt#because I find myself now relying more on obi-wan's mentality post-tpm than post-rots if that makes sense#like. when I first joined the fandom it was important for me to understand how he got through post-rots stuff#because of what was happening in my life at that time#but now i'm at this point in my life where i need to know how he got through post-tpm#so my brain is just gonna focus on that a lot more#+ i have complicated feelings about ahsoka now so it's like. writing tcw era fic with the disaster trio will be a bit trickier i think#idk i guess we'll see as the month progresses
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as much as the absolute insanity directed towards me was bizarre, upsetting, and frustrating, i'm glad it happened bc i had lovely interactions with some very lovely ppl on this webbed site, and it showed me that while this fandom is heavily populated with meanies with zero reading comprehension, there is also a large amount of ppl who are really wonderful, and have left me beautiful comments on my fic and sent me lovely supportive messages in my inbox.
thank you all so much -- you make a big difference by being here, at least to me!!!
see y'all for the fic update on wednesday <3
#personal#my dash is finally free of bullshit now that a lot of ppl blocked me or i blocked them lol#it feels refreshing#there are so many problems in this fandom such as the Situation With A Minor Who Lied Abt Their Age and produced audio smut#but i feel like they're none of my business anymore bc i don't interact with that part of the fandom any longer lol#if ppl are comfortable interacting with minors so be it but i am very much NOT#i'm here to post my fics and if i sense any sort of bullshit near me i am Blocking immediately lol#thankfully the main wave seems to have died down#but we'll see what happens when i post on wednesday lol#hopefully ppl will have gotten bored of being insane by then already#down with bullying censorship and puritanism#and down with fandom hivemind and middle school mentality#i'd rather be canceled than be a cowardly sheep
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the seasons so far this year have felt really weird. it was unseasonably warm in February, didn't really seem to get gradually warmer through the rest of spring, randomly ended up being frosty at the start of May, also randomly ended up foggy yesterday in a way I associate with late autumn, and the trees had blossom since late January but no leaves until some time last month.
but then the weather suddenly got a lot warmer recently and now it feels summer-y and we keep having to have the A/C on and it's basically felt like being in a bizarre liminal state where the seasons are kind of malfunctioning and fucked up and then suddenly being thrown into early summer, having not really been prepared for that because what the fuck even was this spring
#personal#thoughts#🍬 post#2024#it's been a really weird year#it's also simultaneously been really stressful and been a year where we've done a bunch of stuff that's been really exciting and fun#so it's like... it's been a shitshow but I think we are managing the whole ''I'll find a way to make it a good year no matter what'' thing#like a bunch of really rough shit has happened but we're also doing objectively better with a lot of things#I think I'm possibly having a weird night because we processed emotional stuff earlier#and now the warm summer-y atmosphere in our room is giving me very vague weird flashbacks I can't quite pinpoint#I think I'm getting flaashbacks to the last two summers and either I can find a way to vibe with that and not feel too bad#or I'm gonna end up feeling really fucking weird so I guess we'll see what happens
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Untitled Werewolf!Carlos WIP
predictably, I have been thinking about werewolf!Carlos so
He’d been sure to hide the bite marks under long leather sleeves—but that was after the fact where Jay had appeared, swinging a bat; he’d cracked the wolf’s skull right open—pretended it was nothing, like he’d just happened to be out there, in fuck all nowhere…
Oh, who was he kidding?
“Jay,” Carlos sighs out in the present moment, eyes flickering aside to where the crickets have stopped chirping. “I know you’re there.”
Jay doesn’t deny it.
He meanders out from the shadows, thumbs hooked in his pockets and shoulders slack, but a certain tension in his jaw as he looks from left to right, then back to Carlos. “Hey,” he offers. “Whatcha doing?”
#descendants#carlos de vil#jay son of jafar#jaylos#werewolf!Carlos#descendants fanfiction#my fanfiction#my writing#descendants fandom#I have written 1K of this#undecided if I want that to be a prologue or if I'm just going to keep writing and post it as a oneshot idk idk#I don't expect it to be very long so we'll see what happens#for now please accept this excerpt#tomorrow?? who knows
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I'm not sure where this expectation of the Go 2 press tour which I see from you and some other fans is coming. Did someone say something? I mean, there definitely should be some PR action, a couple of interviews, maybe the cast appearance at a screening or something, but nothing near the promotion of the 1 season, not a 'press tour'. No one promotes 2nd seasons even half as much as 1 seasons. As a rule. Unless there's a very specific decision to do so. So I would tame expectations imo.
I mean...good grief, Anon. It just poured for the entire weekend where I live, and yet it feels like your message is doing a far more thorough job of raining on my metaphorical parade.
So, let's break a few things down here. First, my personal philosophy is and always will be "Hope for the best, expect the worst." That is not to say that, in the case of GO 2 promotion, I expect the absolute worst, because I don't...but I am also more than adept at keeping my expectations in check thanks to many, many years of experience with disappointment.
With that in mind, you are correct, no one has said anything specifically or formally about the GO 2 press tour or what it might/will entail. Most of us have been working off of the idea--the hope, even--that because season 1 had a press tour, then logically, so should season 2. (Especially because, as I've previously mentioned, the show does still need to bring in new viewers to ensure that there will be a third season.)
As of right now, however, it looks like the only potential impediment to a press tour--or at least Neil being involved with one--is the looming Writers' Strike (well, not-so-looming, since it now seems to be actually happening). So the effects that could have on promoting GO 2/what sorts of appearances the cast and crew will make are unknown for now, and remain to be seen.
But I still feel like you're missing the larger point here, Anon. The thing that has so many of us excited isn't the breadth or level of promotion, but rather that Michael and David will be together during whatever promotion does happen. The majority of the things I mentioned in this poll were listed as mere possibilities...but the one that seems most probable (and that received the most votes, as it were) was Michael and David flirting with each other. I've also received DMs from people who, as much as they are eagerly anticipating the show, care even more about seeing Michael and David together again--playful, relaxed, and most of all, happy.
So does that mean a press tour as extensive as the first season? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe Michael and David will only get to do a handful of interviews or appearances together, but it's the substance of those that makes all the difference. It's that we can all watch Michael and David on TV, or Youtube, or listen to them on the radio, and for even the briefest of moments, feel a sense of respite from what is happening in the world. It's that even when there is so much misery and hate and unkindness running rampant, there is still something that can bring such happiness. Something to look forward to, even just for a little while. And that's what I'm optimistic about, and will continue to be optimistic about here on my blog.
Again, you may be entirely right, Anon, and the GO 2 press tour could turn out to be nothing more than Michael and David doing a ribbon-cutting at a Tesco in Milton Keynes...but I'd still want to watch it because I know no matter what happens, Michael and David will enjoy every second of it as long as they are together.
And I think that's still something worth hoping for.
#anonymous#reply post#good omens 2#michael sheen#welsh seduction machine#david tennant#soft scottish hipster gigolo#also I think Michael and David are looking much too forward to seeing each other again for there not to be some kind of promotion#so i believe they will make the most of whatever does happen#the eternal optimist in me is hoping for the best#so we'll see what happens#fingers crossed#also now I really want to hear Neil say 'by Aziraphale's flaming sword...what a savings' in front of that Tesco#i'm just saying#discourse
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if it isn't asking for tmi what's your band called like starting one with your cousins is so wicked im so interested and i you don't wanna answer that like what kind of stuff do you write/make instead :()
NOT TMI AT ALL I LOVE TALKIGN ABOUT MUSIC FUCK YEAFH
our band's called "et un cheval" which means "and one horse" in french. i wish i had a cool backstory for why we chose this name but in reality it's kind of an inside joke that came about while we were all laughing our asses off at 3 in the morning, sleep deprived out of our minds. you know when youre so tireed that everything's funny? that's kind of how it originated, cause our original name was going to be the four horsemen (theres 4 of us), but there are like a hundred bands with that name . i rlly dont remember how we got "and one horse" from "the four horsemen" but one of my cousins studied french and shes like "hey it would sound rlly cool if it was in french" and she was RIGHT. so ...yeah! et un cheval, that's our band name :)) it makes no sense but we've embraced it <3
as for music, we're hoping to be indie rock at best. we're all still fairly new at our instruments cause we're all self-taught (me with guitar + ukulele and the others with guitar, bass, and piano) so we're still trying to find our sound at the moment. none of us actually played instruments until a few years ago, so we're learning how to write songs as a BAND with INSTRUMENTS. which is hard. but fun ! :D
right now to help us figure out how to play instruments together as a band, we're working on covers of songs instead of writing original songs. so like right now, we're working on call me what you like by lovejoy and trying to learn our individual parts on our instruments + how to play them together with each other. and dude. LET ME UFCKING TELL YOU. THIS SHIT IS SO MUCH FUN. IT'S SO MUCH FUN AND I DON'T EVEN CARE THAT WE'RE NOT THAT GOOD YET BECAUSE I'VE LITERALLY DREAMED OF BEING IN A BAND SINCE I WAS A LITTLE KID and now it's finally coming true :)))))
thank you so much for asking i love lovel ove talking about music & my band and my cousins i love it more than anything :')) <3
#frankcuntstein#what im not going to add in the main post is that we're only going to be able to practice together until june#idk if you remember that post i made a little bit ago where i was like. a Really Fucking Big Life Changing Thing happened to me that's rlly#sad and depressing but basically my cousins are going to be moving permanently to texas in june and we likely wont be able to see each othe#on a weekly basis for. probably ever.#so we're just trying to spend as much time together as possible until they have to leave forever.#i get rlly sad thinking about it so i try not to focus on it but yeah. our band'll prob be short lived.#so i'm trying to enjoy as much of it as i can before they leave.#really sucks cause our families have been living within 30 min of each other since 2005 and now we'll be apart indefinitely.#okay enough of that. tldr i love my cousins and my band and music is so fun etc etc :)
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would it theoretically be possible to commission you to do more Tai Sui comics? I love them so much (rushing to ask since you said you're looking for other things to read)
probably not!! I'm not currently doing commissions. I'm not done drawing for Tai Sui yet though!!
#“lyf why don't you do commissions” putting a price tag on my stuff gives me intense anxiety#and i have issues with underpricing my stuff and making it so that i'm not even working for minimum wage LOL#pip speaks#if there's something in my ask box i think is funny i might draw it but whether or not i take requests is between me and god#and also my adderall medication#anyways. just like how i'm still making svsss stuff even though i finished it a year ago. i'll still be making ts stuff when insp hits me#i have a collection of himbo text posts dedicated to xu rucheng. there are too many of them. he's so stupid. i love him.#right now liu yao is winning the poll so we'll see what happens next
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Not me praying for eska sunday to come faster because the tag has been so dead lately.
soon! it'll be sunday soon! and then next week (if all goes according to plan) i'll be posting the flayed!robin au throughout the week so like, if you're interested in that, that'll be fun
#and THEN i can go back to writing the robin coming out scene for thriving in the apocalypse#y'know. the one i was about to start before flayed!robin took over my life#asks#anon#celebrity fake dating au#i also miiiiiight. depending on how many chapters flayed!robin is. post the next cfdau chapter and leave it hanging for a week#bc that's a lot of content to post in a single week. two chapters and the whole flayed!robin au#but we'll see what happens#anyway i'm rambling back to editing now byeee
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