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fullrangeofemotions · 3 years

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Cafe Ophelia: Coffee Shop AU Part 2

Welp, here is part 2. Donna finds closure, gets more friends, flirts with all the ladies, and Laira and Hal finally meet. Guy is still no where to be found. Next part, though, I SWEAR. To all you who read this, once again, thank you for putting up with me.

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Donna tilted her head back, basking in the warmth of the sun. The winter air was crisper than she remembered it being. After a moment of steeling herself, she squared her shoulders and found herself slipping back into the old Donna.

There was no hesitation as she made her way up the steps and into the court. She kept her hands in her pockets, rushing up the remaining steps as an officer on his way out held the door open for her. She smiled in thanks, giving him a nod before slipping into the, thankfully, warm lobby. Donna made her way down the hallway, not quite dreading being there yet but also not quite comfortable. It was not hard to spot Arianne, leaning against one of the columns, a phone pressed to her ear. Donna raised her hand and offered a wave, letting Ari know that she was there but Donna did not wish to cut Ari’s conversation short. Not when she had people to see. She moved farther down the hallway until she saw a familiar face. Rachel turned around, brightening when she saw Donna, her arms opening as she rushed at her old friend. Donna squeezed Rachel into a tight hug, not bothering to let go until the sound of someone clearing their throat forced them to step back from each other.

Donna turned her head and smiled, moving to pull Mike into a hug as well. She felt him hug her just as tightly, “you did not have to come,” she heard him whisper against her ear. She knew he was not talking about the subpoena, for that was out of her hands. Donna pulled back after a long moment, her gaze taking his face in, noticing the dark circles around his eyes. Donna turned to look at Rachel and saw the same tiredness on her face. She pulled the both into a hug, needing to feel them in her arms one more time, to remind herself that they were there.

“How come no one told me we were hugging?”

A familiar voice cut in, making Donna pull away and whirl around. It was all it took for Louis to move in and hug her tightly; she ignored the sniffling coming from him, not surprised by his emotional response. Donna rather missed it. She looked over his shoulder at Jessica, who offered a small smile.

“I missed you too Louis,” she muttered, patting his back until finally pulled away, wiping at his eyes.

“Donna.”

That voice had Donna tensing, her defenses coming up immediately. Still, her smile remained in place as she turned her head to look at Harvey. There was a fragility to his gaze, almost as if he had seen a ghost and for a second, Donna wanted to do anything in her power to make it go away. After all, she had spent more than a decade taking care of him….

“Donna and I have a long history, mostly, of me getting her out of trouble,” Arianne started, before stopping to take a quick sip of her wine, “hmm, she has the quickest hands I have ever seen. Anyone in New York who ever lost a watch? Probably my girl’s doing.”

Donna rolled her eyes, “first of all, I had a hobby and I was good at it, second of all, no court ever prove I stole anything,” she defended herself, plucking out one of the breadsticks to dip into the olive oil before taking a bite. Those years felt like a century ago, when was the last time she tried to lift something? Donna paused, alright, she still sometimes lifted or slipped papers, but it was usually at the behest of Harvey or Jessica. It had only been something she did because she could, because she had been good at it.

“It seems that you two make quite a pair, hmm?” Laira chuckled as she swirled her wine around her glass before taking her time sipping at her wine, lipstick staining the rim. Donna and Ari shared a look, both of them looking thoughtful before shrugging at the same time.

“Yes, well, Donna stopped being fun when she got with that second-rate lawyer of hers,” Arianne commented, voice light and airy but there was no hiding her disdain. Donna was not surprised for her friend had never hidden how much she disliked Harvey. Arianne had every right to dislike that man and to resent Donna as well. (Except, Arianne didn’t resent her at all. She just hated him.) Ever since she started to work for Harvey, her time with Ari, and the Martell’s as a whole was cut down. She had not meant to, but Donna had gotten busy, and then Harvey made no effort to disguise that he was not a fan of the Martells. Although, they did not technically handle the same kinds of cases, they ran paths enough for Harvey to know that there was no beating them.

It was a well-known fact that, regardless of how much Donna loved Harvey (because she had loved him, part of her still did) her friendship with Arianne would win out. Harvey had to have known that. He would never dare to ask her to choose. Neither had Arianne.

“The one in the newspapers, I take it?”

Donna looked over at Laira, surprised for a second before turning to look at Arianne. “This trial is in the newspapers?” she hissed, dreading this even more now than she had already been. “What did you expect? That man doesn’t know how to do anything without you there holding his hand,” Arianne muttered under her breath before taking a bite of her lasagna. Donna glanced down at her plate, no longer hungry as she thought about the firm, about her name, being in the papers. This was not how she wanted to get her name in the papers.

“Hmm, and you are here to testify for the trial?”

Donna looked back at Laira, not seeing any kind of condemnation or judgement. She took a moment to gather her thoughts before letting out a soft sigh, “had no choice, it would be a huge fault for the prosecution to not call the legal secretary in to testify. After all, what kind of secretary worth her worth would not know what transpired in those offices?” Donna did not regret it, her knowledge, all the cover up. She had told Jessica once, why she had done it…Mike was good for Harvey. He shook everything up, changed everyone and Donna knew they were all better for it.

“You were more than a legal secretary, you helped run that place,” Arianne cut in, pointing her fork at Donna, who only picked up her glass of wine. She was more than that, Donna had believed it, still believed it…she knew it, so why was she doubting herself? The silence was telling enough. “You will not sacrifice yourself for them, for him. Not this time,” the words were spit out, startling Donna out of her stupor, words of defense slipping out of her mouth before she could help it. It was what Donna always did, defend him, because she knew him, she understood him, “he has never asked-“

“Bullshit.” Arianne glared at Donna, forgetting where they were, who they were with in that moment, all she felt was righteous anger, “he has always expected you to give everything up for him and you do, you always do. You sacrifice yourself for him every fucking single time.”

Donna hated her in that moment, because she was right. Arianne was right and Donna hated it. Donna had been defined by her relationship with Harvey and Donna had allowed it. Even now, after everything, Donna was still fretting, still willing to give it all up for him. “I would do the same for you,” Donna answered, because that was true too. Donna was selfish in so many things, but never when it came to those she loved.

“I know, but unlike him, I would never ask you to.”

Silence fell upon them after that, Donna lowered her gaze back down to her food. Arianne continued to eat her lasagna. It was not until Laira cleared her throat that the two even remembered she was there. Donna was horrified but she hid it away, focusing instead of trying to eat her pasta.

“From what I read in the papers,” Donna tensed, wondering what Laira was going to say, “you will be here for a couple of days Donna. There is an exclusive show of next Winter’s collection being held tomorrow, I can add you to the list if you wish to attend the event.”

Donna looked up at Laira, surprised that after what she had just witnessed that was what she would say. Slowly a smile bloomed upon her lips and Donna laughed, tension sliding off her shoulders.

“I would love that.”

“Harvey…” Donna took in the haggard appearance, trying not to worry but failing, “you look tired.” She didn’t notice the way the others moved away, too focused on trying to understand how she felt about the man before her. She had spent twelve years by his side….

“You look like you always do,” he stated, voice soft, softer than she had ever heard from him. At least, when it came to her. Even softer than the night he gave her so much hope. He was not one to give compliments, and when he did, not to her. Her life had truly been full of disappointment, all coming from him…

“Do you miss me?” she asked him, the words out of her mouth before she could stop them. She did not regret them, because she had to know. She had been courageous that night in his office, breaking whatever was between them. Donna knew now that she could live without him, that she was someone without him, that she was better without him. She knew it now.

“I once told you, I could not be me without you…I meant it…”

Those words caught her by surprise. She remembered that day, when he came for her, brought her back. He was so good at reeling her back in, keeping her waiting for him to be ready. But Donna had not wanted to be needed, what good did that do? She had wanted him to choose her, to want her, to know that he would choose her over everything.

“You said you needed me, but I wanted you to want me, to choose me. I made myself be comfortable with the co-dependency, with being your security blanket….but I know now that I wanted to be loved.”

She stared at him as she said this, as she told him her truth. The failure was from both keeping quiet in fear. She did not push, did not try for more but neither had he. There was pain in his eyes, anguish that urged her to try and make him feel better, but she didn’t. She could not. There was no taking back those words, she wouldn’t silence herself anymore. There was also something else there, an understanding, a clarity.

“I will always care for you, Harvey. Always. Perhaps one day, you’ll care for yourself,” she reached out and squeezed his arm, surprised when he reached up and took her hand in his, giving it a slight squeeze.

“Sorry, not sorry,” Ari cut in abruptly, pushing herself between the two of them and forcing Harvey to drop Donna’s hand, stepping back.

“Martell.” “Specter.”

Thankfully, before Arianne got into trouble for punching the man, they were called inside. Donna locked her arm with Ari’s and began to drag her into the courtroom, offering Harvey a parting smile. She had said her piece, had spoken her feelings to him and she felt…better. It did not suddenly heal the disappointment and heartbreak, because those were years of putting herself last…but Donna would work on it. All she had to do was get through testifying.

Donna walked up the steps of the MET, surprised that the event would be taking place within the walls of the institution. The exclusivity was emphasized by the lack of crowds, no red-carpet, no big lines. She was still surprised at how easily she was led in; her name had been clearly printed upon the list which also had a picture of her to go with it. It spoke of just how exclusive this event was. Donna walked down the hallway; her navy-blue clutch held within her right hand as she took in the sights. She had forgotten what it was like to visit the MET, an institution she could admit she missed.

“Right this way Ms. Paulsen,” the sudden voice startled her, but she quickly smiled (despite wondering how the attendant had known who she was). About more than half of the chairs were filled up, while the rest of the guests were mingling by the bar. The dress-code was thankfully not over the top which meant that Donna’s strapless dark green gown fit right in.

Not in the mood for a drink, Donna turned to the attendant, “is there a specific seating arrangement?” she asked, wanting to ensure that she did not accidentally take the seat of someone important. “You have a seat reserved Ms. Paulsen, right at the front,” he smiled and pointed to the seat right next to the runway. “Thank you,” she responded, hiding her surprise that she had been given such a seat. “Would you like a drink Ma’am?” the attendant asked her but she shook her head, “not at the moment, thank you….” Donna glanced at the nametag, “Josh.”

It was not the first event of this kind that she had been to, but it had been a while. She slid upon the chair that had been designated for her, one leg crossed over the other, as she let herself people watch. “Sorry,” a breathless voice cut in as the seat next to her was taken. Donna turned her head and was surprised to see a face that almost looked familiar. Where had she seen it? Ah. “You are Daenerys,” Donna spoke up, pleased that she could remember that fact, her hand coming up for the woman to shake. Daenerys brightened up, smile stretching from ear to ear, blonde-almost platinum- hair framed her pixie like face. If Donna thought that Laira had fine chiseled cheeks, they were nothing compared to Daenery’s smaller yet more pointed features. “I’m Donna,” she continued, sure that Laira’s sister had no idea who the random woman sitting there was. Or perhaps she did if she read the newspaper.

“Did I not see you in a Shakespeare production not too long ago,” the woman asked and suddenly Donna froze, her breath hitching. Donna had forgotten that had been something Donna had done. The feeling of being on stage suddenly came up and Donna let out a breathless laugh, nodding, “The Merchant of Venice, are you a Shakespeare fan?” she couldn’t hep asking, it was not everyday she found someone that shared her love for theater, and more specifically, Shakespeare.

“Cannot say I am a fan, but I do enjoy theater. Went with my partner, he was adamant that he needed to go. Something about needing to see one specific actress….”

It dawned on her in that moment exactly who Daenerys was talking about, suddenly remembering that one of Laira’s sisters was dating Arianne’s uncle. “Oberyn never mentioned that he was there,” she blurted out, surprised that she had not known or that he had not once mentioned it to her.

“Wait, how did he find out?” she asked, still remembering the terror of failing that kept her from sharing the news with anyone. Donna had not wanted to risk choking on stage in front of people she knew.

“You were fantastic,” Daenerys beamed, reaching over and squeezing Donna’s arm, surprising her with how tactile she was. As Donna slipped into retelling all the craziness of putting on a Shakespeare play, she found her passion returning, remembering why she had loved it so much in the first place.

“Are you planning on being in any future productions?”

The questioned stumped Donna, the answer was no, at least it should be no. “I would love to, but first have to make sure that my coffeeshop doesn’t go under. Perhaps once I’m better established, I’ll think about doing another play or two.”

Conversation came to an end after that, for the show started.

Donna stood up in one swift motion as she was called to the stand. She placed her hand on the bible and vowed to tell the truth and nothing but the truth so help her God. Donna felt the eyes of everyone upon her and it almost reminded her about how it felt to be on stage. Had she not always wanted to be the center of attention? She let her eyes wander over to where Harvey sat, but she was quickly pulled away as the questions began.

The confirmation of her name was easy enough, but then the real questions began, and she met Arianne’s gaze.

“I take the fifth.”

She stared at the lawyer before her, her gaze and tone steady as she repeated the same answer to every single question. It was her right.

“Rest assure I will find my way to California and visit that shop of yours,” Arianne muttered as she pulled Donna into a tight hug.

“You better,” Donna huffed, hugging her friend back just as tightly. She could never thank her friend enough for bailing her out every single time. “Tell me about any cute boys you see,” Ari added as they finally parted ways. Donna rolled her eyes, but she laughed.

Donna was still trying to heal from her last…. whatever Harvey had been to her….there was no time for cute boys.

“Oh! You already have a cute boy!” Ari waggled her eyebrows as she motioned to Donna’s buzzing phone. Hal’s name was flashing at her and Donna wrinkled her nose at the thought.

“No, Hal is an annoyance,” she stated, although she was sure she did not manage to hide her fondness like she wanted.

“Are you going to jail?” where the first words out of his mouth.

Donna snorted at the question, because of course that was the first thing the man asked. Still, Donna could hear the worry in his tone. “Good morning to you too,” she started as she cradled her phone between her ear and shoulder, leaving her hands free to fold her clothes and tucked them back into her suitcase. All while trying to ignore Arianne who was pretending to be helping.

“Of course not, I told you I don’t look good in orange,” she huffed, humming softly as she forced her clothes down, wondering why suddenly it felt like she had brought a lot of clothes with her.

“Are you okay?” the question came after a long minute of silence and Donna smiled at it.

“I think I’m ready to go back home,” she answered, the first time she called California her home.

“Good, Helen misses you.”

“I miss her too.”

Arianne looked at her with a raised eyebrow, “Nope, he is not uncomfortable to look at…..but…not my type. I think….he is my first Californian friend….” She admitted to Arianne who immediately softened, “I’m glad. Well, maybe he is Laira’s type. She needs a cute boy in her life too.”

Donna laughed because of course, “Ari, never change.”

Being back in her shop was a bit strange but also a welcomed relief. She felt good. Donna busied herself with getting everything dusted and ready for the crazy morning. She hoped her customers had not forgotten her and gone somewhere else.

But, like clockwork, as she flipped her signed at six in the morning, her first customer walked in already telling her they were glad she was back.

Donna plopped down on the sand, part of her regretting this because it was freezing but she also missed it. The sounds of the crashing waves were soothing and scent of the salt in the breeze felt like home.

“Oh, hey,” a voice cut into her thoughts, startling her slightly. She turned her head to look at the jogger, the one with the platinum hair. For a second, Donna thought back on Arianne’s comment about a cute boy….it had been a time since Donna had been with a cute girl. The woman before her was beautiful, with crystal blue eyes and platinum hair that contrasted with her tan skin. Then she remembered the woman’s partner, the boyfriend who was usually by her side.

“By yourself this time?” Donna smiled, because she was definitely not ready to get out there and be thinking about romance. Friendships, though, now that she knew that California was where she wanted to be, were welcomed.

“My partner got caught up at work, you know how it is.” The words were clipped but not rude, it was the accent but Donna couldn’t put a name to it.

Donna smiled wide, “I definitely do, I have been there and been that person many times,” she answered causing the woman to laugh. “I’m Tora,” she stuck her hand out and Donna took it, “I’m Donna,” she said, trying to hide her surprise at how cold Tora’s hand was. The woman smiled apologetically, “sorry, I always happen to be colder than most.”

“Well, should start heading back, see you tomorrow,” Tora called out as she began to jog away, leaving Donna to stare at her.

That was a strange encounter, she thought. She wasn’t actually expecting to see Donna again, was she? She shook her head and decided to not think too hard about it. Donna was sure to see Tora and her boyfriend around again, they clearly lived in the area and so did she.

Her phone rang and the name had her rolling her eyes.

“What? Its five in morning on a Sunday, you better be dying,” she growled into the phone but of course Hal was unfazed. God, he reminded her of herself and wasn’t that annoying. She still did not remember when she had given him her phone number. How did he get it? She could not have possibly given it to him. Then again, Helen might have asked and Donna found it hard to say no to her.

“How fast can you get to Ferris Air?” “For the last time, I’m not getting into a plane with you,” she grumbled, because if he woke her up for this she really was going to kill him, “look, you have not flown until you’ve gotten into a plane with me but not why I’m calling. Last minute call from the CEO about last minute meeting with our biggest investors.”

“Who, the general of the armed forces?” Donna huffed out, already feeling her sleep fading away. “Yes.”

“Why do I need to be there?” because why did any of this have to do with Donna? She didn’t work at Ferris Air. “We need coffee…….”

She hung up. Donna was not a catering service. The phone rang continuously for five minutes.

“If I do this, you will owe me big time,” she stated as she answered the phone, hoping he could feel her murder intent through the phone.

The drive to Ferris Air was not a long one which explained why Hal was able to show up at her shop and still make it to work. She was quite impressed with his work, he was good at what he did, but she would not be telling him that. After all, she was showing up for him at five in the morning on a Sunday, if that didn’t say she was fond of him, nothing ever would.

She waited until the guards checked that she was meant to be there before she drove in and towards were, she hoped was the office building and where she was meant to be. She hummed as she took her little cart from her truck and began to pile the boxes of coffee inside, placing the boxes of pastries on top of those, precariously making her way to the entrance. The guard that stood there was, thankfully, a kind soul and offered to help her take it to the meeting room. The meeting room looked exactly like how she expected it to. She still could not believe she was in an office she did not even worked at, bringing her signature coffee. She really was insane.

“Oh, thank God, coffee, can you pour me some? With two sugars and creamer, sweetheart?”

Donna froze, before slowly exhaling and deciding to ignore the man. After all, she did not work there, and she refused to interact with anyone. “I know you heard me.”

“Are you speaking to me?” she asked, her tone dripping with boredom as she finished laying out the pastries on two platters. “No one else is here sweetheart, just the two of us.”

Donna rolled her eyes and turned around, completely unamused with some cheap suit wannabe. “My name is not sweetheart, and clearly you have two working arms and two working feet,” she told him, one eyebrow raised, happy to watch the man scowl at her. “I can get you fired,” the man spit-out and Donna wondered, were these really the type of people Hal worked with?

“To bad for you, I don’t work here,” she told him, picking up her bag and readying to leave. She had done as she was asked, the coffee and pastries were ready for this meeting.

“Do you know-“

“Look, I don’t care who you are. Your suit is clearly from a sale, the jacket is too big for you, at least get it tailored. The hair shows you are trying too hard. Perhaps if you did your job instead of coaster on other people you might get the promotion you clearly think you deserve,” she told him, steel in her tone. Donna might have had to put up with men talking down to a lowly legal secretary, but Donna was her own boss and she would not let some asshole talk down to her.

“What the did you just say to me?” the man stood up and took a threatening step towards her.

“I hope I am not interrupting,” a smooth voice cut in and Donna watched with pleasure as the man paled as if he had seen a ghost. Clearly, the boss had arrived. Donna turned her gaze over to the doorway, recognizing the face of Carol Ferris, current CEO of Ferris Air. She looked quite intimidating in the photo used for her Wikipedia page, but there was nothing like seeing her fury directed to the annoying man.

“Ma’am, I did not realize you were there,” the man stammered out, all wide eyed and Donna couldn’t help but grin.

“Clearly,” the woman’s tone was clipped, it reminded Donna of Jessica. Carol’s gaze moved over to Donna, the anger replaced by curiosity, “Ms. Ferris, I’m from Café Ophelia, delivering the coffee and pastries that were ordered,” she stated, motioning to the goods she had brought with her.

“You are a life-saver, most shops are not open this early in the morning,” the woman stated, moving over to the table to pick up a coffee cup. “Well, I’m a fairly new shop, must get business where I can,” Donna answered quite honestly, figuring she had nothing to lose. There was a flash of recognition, “I see.”

“It was nice to meet you, Ms. Ferris,” Donna stated and meant it. There was something about meeting strong, independent, gorgeous women. “Not you,” she then stated as she looked over to the asshole, giving him a sweet smile because they both knew that he would be in trouble come Monday morning.

Perhaps Donna would not kill Hal for waking her up and forcing her to show up at his job. He was on thin ice though.

“You are on thin ice,” she told him early Monday morning as he came in for his usual morning coffee, “and don’t try flattering those eyelashes at me, you know how it freaks me out.” She told him, but she was already smiling.

“So this is where you get that coffee,” a voice cut in, startling both Hal and Donna.

“Carol?” “Ms. Ferris?”

“That’s me,” the woman smiled, this time it reached her eyes and it made her look kind in a way that the photos online never did.

“You never told her about my shop? You are supposed to be helping me advertise, what kind of friend are you?” Donna huffed as she glanced at Hal, before smiling wide at the CEO and his boss. “I know just the blend for a busy CEO,” she stated confidently before turning around and quickly moving to create a blend for Carol.

“Let her work her magic, she tends to always be right about whatever she makes,” Hal offered, lifting his cup up to his lips. Carol looked at him for a long moment, her smile turning slightly sly, “you here a lot then?”

Hal wrinkled his nose, “it is nothing like that-“ “definitely not like that,” Donna reiterated as she turned back around, a cup in hand. “Rest assure that I’m single and free, in case you were wondering,” Donna added with a wink as she pushed the cup forward towards Carol.

“Don’t,” Hal said at the same time that Carol laughed, returning Donna’s wink.

“See, this is exactly why I never said anything,” Hal said with a huff, while Donna only flipped her hair behind her shoulder. She was teasing but a part of her would say no to a gorgeous woman asking her out either.

Donna and Carol shared a look and Donna knew it was going to be a good week.

The redhead glanced at her calendar and then froze because she realized winter was upon them…but it was almost the holidays. How did that happen? she wondered. Had she really moved to California around February? A full year was just around the corner. Oh God, Christmas shopping, she thought.

“Did I come in at the wrong time?” a teasing voice cut into her thoughts and Donna was turning with a big grin. “Laira! It is never a wrong time for you. I would drop everything for you, I’m sure you know this by now,” she told the woman, slipping some innuendo into her words, waggling her eyebrows, pleased at being rewarded with a soft chuckle.

“Are you here for a business meeting? Putting a runway show?” she asked as she quickly moved into making a chrysanthemum tea this time around, sure that Laira would enjoy it.

“Actually, been working on opening a boutique here,” Laira answered, her gaze flitting over the pastries currently on display. “You mean I’ll get to bask in your presence more often?” Donna let out a dramatic gasp, while Laira tried to hide her smile at Donna’s playfulness. “Is this your way of asking me out, because you must know I’ll say yes,” Donna continued to tease, turning around to offer Laira up the cup of tea.

“Oh? I remember you professing your love to Ari not too long ago,” Laira stated, tone completely serious but Donna could see the spark of amusement in her eyes.

“My heart is big enough for the both you,” she responded but suddenly the door burst open and a tiny little ballerina came running in.

“Miss Donna! Uncle Hal says that The Nutcracker is not actually that good, tell him he is wrong,” Helen called out, clearly horrified that her uncle would say such a thing. And then, it dawned on Helen that they were not alone. She turned her head to the side and up, eyes widening, “you are so pretty. Are you a princess?” came her whispered question, making Laira smile wide, but before she could reply Hal came stumbling in.

“it is the same thing every single….” Hal began to grumble but lost his train of thought the moment he caught sight of Laira.

And Donna would never forget that moment as Hal completely lost all brain function at the sight of Laira. Donna was going to have to call Ari and tell her about this.

#;drabble #/clearly thats the wrong tag but whatever/#/to anyone reading this bless you cause this is a hot mess lol/#/also yes tora is the best wingwoman i havent written that yet but you'll see i think/#;;fic

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austennerdita2533 · 4 years

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ooh can you do those same top three questions but for suits and tvd :)

Sure can, nonnie! xx

*Just as a general disclaimer for anyone else who happens to read this: my ship preferences are what they are. I’m simply stating my opinion/preference and am in no way encouraging hate or fights. Discussion is always welcome, of course, but happy vibes here only!

*2020 sucks enough as it is without bringing ship drama into it, you know?

TVD

Top 3 seasons:

-1, 2, and 3 without an ounce of hesitation. This was when the show was at its peak in storytelling, characterization, ship development, magic/mythology etc.

Top 3 romantic ships:

-Klaroline. One of my highest echelon ships for reasons I do not need to enumerate; however, I will say what I love about them most is they challenge as well as complement each other in beautifully rich, convoluted ways. Their back and forth is ridiculously entertaining, too!

-Kalijah. They have spice, and angst, and forbidden love, and 500+ years of cat-and-mouse chasing and I will be over here bitter about them for eternity!

-Forwood. *excuse me while I cry over “until we find a way” for a few hours* These two went through so much to be together! Their progressive arc in s2-s3 is still one of my favorites.

*I’m Swiss neutral when it comes to Stelena and Delena, I vacillate between both ships at different times so they’re not included in my top 3. I’m an anomalous TVD shipper, a true outlier, what can I say?

Top 3 platonic ships:

-Klelijah. Klaus and Elijah have an incredibly dense, fraught brotherly dynamic. Something about their ancient ties and 1,000-year bond is gripping. There’s so much spoken and unspoken subtext between them. So many unresolved “somethings.” Plus, it’s no secret that I adore the Originals and all they add to the TVD-verse.

-Klebekah. Klaus and Rebekah sparkle, they sizzle, any time they’re on-screen together. Just the sheer depth of feeling and betrayal and angst they emanate is so entertaining to watch. Don’t get me started on the whole “I loved you more than anyone and you didn’t even care” scene because I get emotional.

-Defan. Stefan and Damon are another complex sibling relationship on the show. Throw into the mix that they find themselves in love with same woman, not once, but twice, and whew! I love the flashbacks we get of them throughout history as well.

*Gotta give shoutouts to my other favorite, though moderately less well-developed, brotps here: Carenzo, Katholine, Rebekoline, and Baroline. *chef’s kiss*

Top 3 characters:

-Caroline Forbes

-Klaus Mikaelson

-Katherine Pierce

Top 3 plotlines you’d change/erase if you could:

-THE BABY PLOTS ! ! ! BOTH OF THEM!!!!!!!!! (I’m talking Klaus/Haley and their tribrid baby and Caroline’s surrogacy/pregnancy with the Gemini twins.) I apologize for my overemphasized caps + exclamation points here, but I loathe these storylines with every fiber of my being. I can’t help it. More often than not, I like to pretend they don’t exist lololol.

-How they handled the beginning of Stefan and Caroline’s romantic relationship was...icky. Like, while Liz was dying? Really? Then she turns off her humanity because he “rejects” her. Again, REALLY? I have major issues with the overall portrayal of them as a couple - particularly with the relationship imbalances as well as the insecurities they heightened instead of tamped out in each other - but the inception of it all is what kills me. Especially because I am a huge proponent of friends-to-lovers ships...and the writers really dropped the ball with them, imo. I’m a multishipper at heart so the disappointment I harbor is PALATABLE.

-The Cure storyline and the Travelers storyline. Didn’t like either of them. They have equal “could’ve been loads better” billing.

Top 3 episodes you’d take to a deserted island:

-3x14, Dangerous Liaisons. LISTEN. This is my favorite episode of the entire series. There’s a ball, there’s blood-tinged champagne, there’s duplicity and romance and drama. All the Mikaelsons are under the same roof, for crying out loud! It’s gold!

-2x07, Masquerade. This one because of my girl, Katherine Pierce, the biggest, baddest bitch of all. She’s a saucy little minx the entire masquerade only to end up locked in the tomb. I just...love it.

-The Klaroliner in me is screaming 4x23, Graduation because being on a deserted island without having access to Klaus’s iconic “however long it takes” declaration would be insupportable. However, a case could be made for either 3x20, Do Not Go Gentle because I am trash for the decade dances, and that one’s my favorite, OR 3x22, The Departed because that is one hell of a season finale!

Suits

Top 3 seasons:

-Season 2. Mike’s secret out of the bag? Them all working together to fight against the merger? Donna shredding evidence to protect Harvey? Daniel fucking Hardman? *thumbs up*

-Season 5. FIREWORKS. Donna’s working for Louis, Harvey’s in therapy, Mike gets arrested/goes on trial, Zane family drama. Exquisite stuff

-Season 3 or Season 1. Don’t make me choose between them, please. 🙏🏻

Top 3 romantic ships:

-Darvey. I mean, OBVIOUSLY. These two idiots had me from the pilot. I knew the moment Donna said “I also took care of that. we’ve been married for the last 7 years” that I was on the precipice of falling into another long, beautiful, up-to-their-chins-in-pining, slow sloooooow burn ships. Granted, I didn’t think it’d take 8 seasons for them to get together lololol but I don’t regret a damn thing!

-Mike and Rachel. They’re adorable together, they truly love each other. Also, can we talk about how they’re a steady couple for most-ish of the show? They have drama, sure, but they work through most of it together. As a unit. THAT’S A BIG DEAL. It’s like going through the canon drive thru and actually getting (most) of what you ordered.

-Louis and Sheila. This is a couple who makes me laugh uproariously AND feel all the emotions. I mean, will I ever forget Louis dropping to one knee in the hospital with his ass cheeks hanging out? NO. Will I ever get over Shelia’s pregnant feet being too fat to fit into her Cinderella glass slippers? NOT ON YOUR LIFE. Will I blubber like an emo sap whenever they finally reconcile/get their happy ending? YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT.

Top 3 platonic ships:

-Mike and Harvey. They have a connection from the beginning but I love seeing how much they rub off on one another, how much deeper their bond grows over the course of the show. Their movie references are always a delight, too. *cries: it’s so beautiful*

-Donna and Louis. Their relationship is so important to me. Like?!?!?!? They have so many fantastic one-on-one moments together - some that make your sides ache with laughter, others that prick your eyes with emotion and tears. Even though it kills me when Donna leaves Harvey to work for Louis, I can’t help but love it too because he fanboys all over her. GIVE DONNA ALL THE LOVE AND APPRECIATION SHE DESERVES.

-Harvey and Louis because they have a formative and/or impactful dynamic. They mostly respect each other but there’s a lot of animosity between them. Makes for such good TV!

Top 3 characters:

-Donna Paulsen aka Fashion Goddess of NYC (can I have all of her outfits? for real) and the Reigning Queen of Sass (who also happens to be the reigning queen of my heart as well). The entire firm would have fallen into collapse without her, FULL STOP.

-Harvey Specter. I have a penchant for stoic, inscrutable, emotionally constipated, on-the-borderline-of-asshole characters and boy did I hit the jackpot with this one!

-This one was hard, but I’m going to go with Louis Litt because his character evolution is amazing! He’s so unlikable at times, what with his competitive streak and anger/jealousy issues, but then there’s this whole other side to him that’s sensitive and vulnerable and sweet. You can’t help but root for him, you know? (Even when you want to punch him right in the nose lol.)

Top 3 plotlines you’d change/erase if you could:

-Harvey giving Paula the credit for why he reconciled with his mother, when it was actually because of Donna. They retcon/fix this in the narrative in s9 but it still bugs me in the moment. I can’t let it go. So sue me.

-Pearson Hardman’s “Harvard Only” hiring law. Not only is it ridiculous and discriminatory but no way in hell would you even be able to implement such a thing in today’s world. Nor should you be able to do so. Diversity is important!

-I wasn’t crazy about the Mike prison storyline but, at the same time, he had to serve out penance for the whole fraud business??? So yeah.

Top 3 episodes you’d take to a deserted island:

-2x07, Sucker Punch. THE MOCK TRIAL, AHHHHHHH. Louis grills Donna about Harvey within an inch of her life. I can hear his inflection during his stream of “do you love Harvey Specter, do you love Harvey Specter” in my head. It is so effing tense in that conference room, I DIE.

3x06, The Other Time. I am all about this flashback episode, okay? It opens Pandora’s box on all things past!Darvey and also shows us how Mike gets thrown out of school.

-8x16, Harvey. If you think I’d willingly retreat to a deserted island without having access to that Darvey love epiphany/love actualization scene then you are kidding yourself! I still blast “Love is Mystical” on full volume just to daydream about that swooping-through-the-apartment-door smooch sometimes. *fans self*

#anonymous #replies #the loveliest of lovely people #ashlee bree talks tvd and suits #i officially want to rewatch suits now anon #so thank you for that #long post #i didn't mean to blab this much #whoops

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courtneyyharper · 4 years

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Top 10 Netflix TV Shows to Binge during Quarantine & Chill

To help out my fellow friends in lockdown and so you don’t have to put up the standard Instagram story asking, I’ll be doing a quick countdown of my top 10 tv shows available on Netflix that will hopefully help you all pass this monotonous time.

This goes without saying but I’m going to say it anyways: all opinions are my own and as admittedly these are all very popular shows please feel free to shoot me suggestions to broaden my own horizons!

I’m going to try and create some semblance of order and countdown from 10! So, without further ado…

10. American Horror Story

Okays, so maybe not one if you scare easily although it’s definitely verging more towards the creepy and uncomfortable side than horror. The good thing about this show is if you don’t like the plot, not to worry because the next season is a completely different ball game with a new story, new characters and probably even a different time period, making the show more of an anthology than a series. A nice little link is the use of the same actors each season and if you look closely, you’ll see the Easter eggs and links between!

It remains popular amongst it’s fanbase and although the initial hype that made me jump on the bandwagon in 2011 has eventually died down it’s still one to check out, if at least just for the first three seasons, if you want something a little strange and peculiar.

https://www.netflix.com/title/70210884?s=i&trkid=13747225

9. Gilmore Girls

Set in the little dreamy American town of Stars Hollow with fast-talking sarcastic humour and a coffee-loving mother and daughter bond at the centre. This is one for those of us who appreciate many a cultural reference and enjoys many a love triangle. An easy watch with truly engaging characters you’ll be sad when this show comes to an end… but not to worry they do one more season, A Year in the Life, to wrap everything up with a bow.

Perfect for an easy watch about college, boys, and most complicated of all… family!

https://www.netflix.com/title/70155618?s=i&trkid=13747225

8. Prison Break

A true classic! You’d be hard pressed to find someone that doesn’t consider this show one of the greats. It’s the one your mum’s boyfriend will continue to talk about and recommend time and time again, right? Just me? Well I finally gave in and was caught into the binge that is Wentworth Miller.

We see him play Michael Scofield, a structural engineer who gets himself purposefully incarcerated in order to save his innocent brother Lincoln from death row, with a classic prison escape. If nothing else this show has you on the edge of your seat for the first season and impressed at the continual twists and turns the character relations and plot takes. This is a show you want to see before it is eventually spoiled for you…

https://www.netflix.com/title/70140425?s=i&trkid=13747225

7. You

Although by show of hands Joe Goldberg is decidedly just Dan Humphreys on steroids, I can’t deny that each Boxing Day that the new season was released it was binged in one day. See Joe fall in love and do anything to keep it. Character driven; monologue driven. Binging this show may have you questioning who’s side you’re on once you’re rooting for the murderer and it’ll make you gasp out loud while doing it.

Just don’t get too attached to any of the characters…

https://www.netflix.com/title/80211991?s=i&trkid=13747225

6. Stranger Things

With an entrancing 80s vibe aesthetic we centre around the small town of Hawkins and a group of best friends during the disappearance of their friend Will and the appearance of a young mute girl with a shaved head and some peculiar abilities. As the story unravels, we’re brought into the world of the supernatural and government conspiracies based loosely on some very real and very spooky Soviet Union experiments. You may also be thinking ‘hey, these kids look familiar’ and that’s right they’re in every other show with a similar 80s theme (see: IT and I Am Not Okay With This). Oh, and Winona Ryder.

I can see this show climbing the list when I finally get round to watching that last season…

https://www.netflix.com/title/80057281?s=i&trkid=13747225

5. Peaky Blinders

I’m just going to say it, it’s cool. What gang movie or show isn’t? We see the Shelby family conduct some dodgy business in 1919 Birmingham as part of the gang, the Peaky Blinders (based however loosely on the real Peaky Blinders street gang in Birmingham). Perfect for fans of DiCaprio’s Gangs of New York. Run ins with the law, underhand criminal happenings in the back room of a bar, gang wars. Have I said enough? Cillian Murphy in a suit perhaps?

The only thing that stops this show being further up the list is despite the overall plot being capturing, each individual episode runs slightly slow, although that won’t affect the awe-feeling at the end of each one.

If nothing else you’ll really get off on the fun of saying ‘By order, of the Peaky focking Blinders!’ again and again until you drive even yourself crazy.

https://www.netflix.com/title/80002479?s=i&trkid=13747225

4. Suits

This one nearly made me change my whole career path and choose law for a degree.

With this show you’ve really got to binge to keep up with the legal jargon but it’s oh so worth it. Mike Ross, an extremely smart college dropout is questionably hired by Harvey Specter, high flying lawyer for a prestigious New York law firm, all while hiding Mike’s secret. And wearing lots and lots of very nice suits.

You’ll be surprised how fast you get sucked into the daily going-on of the law office. Plus, you get to see Meghan Markle (fun fact: who’s real name is Rachel!) pre-royalty vibes. Sleek, sexy, sophisticated, sharp-dialogue and by episode three you’ll be singing the Greenback Boogie and buying your own ‘You Just Got Litt Up!’ mug by the end of the week.

https://www.netflix.com/title/70195800?s=i&trkid=13747225

3. Atypical

A truly honest coming of age story as Sam Gardner, a teenager on the autism spectrum, attempts to navigate high school, family, friends, love and… penguins? This is one where you’ll just have to trust me and watch to understand.

https://www.netflix.com/title/80117540?s=i&trkid=13747225

2. The Vampire Diaries

Now we’re getting down to the nitty gritty. Okays, yes, if you’re a regular binger then chances are you’ve already saw this show. This show has been on my favourites list since the day it aired in 2008. The first adaptation ever (it’s the English student in me, sorry) that was better than the book and with 171 episodes it’s the ultimate binge.

Vampires (not the sparkly kind), witches, werewolves and love triangles all clash in the small town of Mystic Falls. Granted it sounds like a chick-flick, but I know just as many boy friends as girls that have got sucked (ha, get it?) into this rollercoaster. This is my number one recommendation to anyone who asks for a new show and I’ll say now what I always say: give this show a go and once you get over the cheesiness of the angsty story-telling from the beginning of Season One, then it’ll be worth every moment.

https://www.netflix.com/title/70143860?s=i&trkid=13747225

1. Friends

Oh… my… god!

The one where it’s controversial.

You probably love it, hate it or if you’re a culchie then you’re most likely discovering it for the first time (which still baffles me). If you didn’t grow up with this show on E4 nine times a day before Comedy Central stole it then I do feel sorry for you. A truly iconic show and if you truly believe that loving it is not a personality trait then I beg to differ.

Six friends learn about life, family, careers and relationships in New York city.

With 10 seasons it’s the ultimate binge and will always place my number one!

https://www.netflix.com/title/70153404?s=i&trkid=13747225

Netflix Honourable mentions:

Money Heist (Season 1 and maybe season 2, we didn’t really need more after that)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine (Because obviously: nine nine!)

South Park (yeah I know, I was against this show for years but recently just caved and #noregrats)

Lucifer (sexy devil, need I say more?)

Rick and Morty (which was originally on the list but got bumped because I’m just watching the same episodes again and again until they’ve lost all meaning now)

I hope this has helped a few people out and cut down the endless hours of scrolling before just watching something you’ve saw time and time again!

Well that’s all folks! Stay safe and happy binging! ✌🏼

#netflix #lifestyle guide #blogging #social distancing #the vampire diaries #prison break #ahs #american horror story #gilmore girls #suits #atypical #netflix top 10 #binge #quarantine and chill

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nellie-elizabeth · 5 years

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Suits: One Last Con (9x10)

Okay, so then what happens next is that Harvey and Donna move to Seattle, and they become closer than ever to Rachel and Mike. At least once a week, Harvey and Mike have a "guy's night" while Donna and Rachel have a "girl's night." And then, gradually, they realize they've ended up with the wrong people. So they all get divorced and then Donna and Rachel become a couple, and Mike and Harvey become a couple. Someone please tell me they're writing that fic.

Oh, sorry. Was I supposed to talk about the episode? Let's get to it.

Cons:

I predicted last week that this episode would be overcrowded, and I wasn't wrong, exactly. I'm grateful that the conflict with Faye was over before the midpoint, so we could have a nice long goodbye with all of the characters. But while I do enjoy that, I also must admit it doesn't make a lot of sense. Faye was a season-long threat, and she's dispatched a third of the way through the finale. It just goes to show that as interesting of a villain as she might have been in the beginning, she didn't really matter. She was a figurehead. She didn't really change anything about these people and their perspectives on their lives. It all felt pretty pointless in the end.

No matter how much fan service a finale has, there are always going to be things that get missed. For example, it seems strange to me that Jessica couldn't have made a cameo at Louis' wedding. She's working on another show for the same creators; how hard would it have been to get her in for a few minutes? And I hate that Alex was the one to go to Katrina. On the one hand, I get it. They needed to find something for Alex to do in this episode, because he's been a pointless character for several weeks. But Harvey and Katrina never get a moment of apology, and that really sucks.

I've talked a lot in these reviews about my issues with Donna and Harvey. It's not that they're painful to watch, or actively unpleasant. The actors do a good job. It's perfectly serviceable. But I think I've finally figured out one of the reasons why they never quite clicked for me as a couple. Harvey is always talking about how Donna knows him better than anyone. But this is what editors mean when they say "show, don't tell." Donna knows Harvey. We've seen it throughout the years. But how does she show that she knows him? Well, she has the supernatural ability to read his mind and predict his requirements whenever the plot requires it. And she acts like is mommy just as often as she acts like his girlfriend, guiding him through his emotions like an enabler.

But Harvey can say again and again that Donna is the one for him, and how well she gets him... and then we can see Mike in the same episode, showing that same thing, instead of telling it. I'm not even pushing for a romantic interpretation, necessarily. It's just that Mike comes in, and they have their quippy banter. They work together to take down Faye. They re-enact Mike's interview with Harvey but in reverse. They find excuses to touch each other. And in an episode that involved two weddings and a health scare, the single most emotional moment in the episode is when Harvey tries to leave Mike's apartment dramatically after telling Mike he's never stopped trusting him, and Mike says "no," like the very idea of Harvey losing his license is torture to him. They have the chemistry. They have the beating heart of this show, and that's been true from day one. It makes the romance between Harvey and Donna pale in comparison.

Also, in an episode that had to accomplish so many things, so quickly, it was odd to add in that little health scare for Sheila. Why did her pregnancy have to have complications? It felt like something to add just to make for some more drama, but we really didn't need that. I'm glad that mother and daughter were both okay.

Pros:

I was always going to rant and ramble a lot in this review, since it's the last one for the show. But just because I had a lot to say in the "cons" section doesn't mean there was nothing to enjoy here. Let's start with my girl Katrina.

As I said, I was irritated that she and Harvey didn't have an on-screen reconciliation. But I am so, so happy for her that she gets to be name partner! It's so refreshing to have a character arc on this show be about a woman choosing her career over her love life, and having that be an empowering and rewarding choice to make. I'm all about it. She gets to come back to the firm, newly powerful, and stand with Alex, Samantha, and Louis.

Samantha and Alex were both underutilized in this finale, but I get it. I'd rather focus on the longer-standing characters, too. And the show did a good job of making this episode the end of an era for Harvey and Donna, and yet also a new beginning for the others. The image of the new firm name on the wall was really lovely. I especially liked that Samantha acknowledged how crazy it was that they'd kept changing the name, and decided that they can't change it anymore for at least five years. But Litt Wheeler Williams Bennett will be stronger for Katrina's presence among them.

Louis has one of the best glow-ups in TV history. There were times over the years where I didn't think I'd be able to forgive him. I still selfishly hold a grudge for that time when he physically attacked Mike. But at the end of the day, he has actually grown as a person. This is a great example of show vs. tell, actually. We've seen it all season - Louis has been calmer. He gets angry or worked up about something, but he doesn't fly off the handle. When he tells his therapist that he's ready to have him as a friend and have him officiate the wedding, it doesn't feel like empty words. Louis might still need therapy in his life, but he has the tools now to know how to get himself the help he needs. It was so fun to see his "final form" as it were. And then we see it put to the test, as Sheila goes into labor during their wedding ceremony. You might expect him to freak out, but he's calm. He's planned for this, and he's there to be supportive for Sheila during this difficult time. Even while he's frantic for her and the baby in the hospital, he keeps a cool head and doesn't do anything he would later regret. Yay Louis! (ps - Louis learning that Donna and Harvey were leaving was more emotional for me than Harvey and Donna's wedding). (pps - that scene of Donna and Louis holding hands in the elevator gave me LIFE).

It was predictable that Harvey and Donna would step up and take advantage of the pre-arranged wedding - a lot of fans predicted this exact outcome. And while I've spoken extensively on my mixed feelings about their relationship, I can't deny the cuteness of the scene. We get that lovely proposal, with Harvey's mother's ring. We get Mike putting his arms around both of them, with his little quip about being unlicensed to officiate. We get Harvey and Mike gripping hands as Harvey leads Donna out for their first dance. It's all very cute, and I feel happy for the big Darvey fans out there. They totally deserve to see all of that happiness, even if I don't agree with the couple at its core. This is the inevitable conclusion, and it was done quite beautifully.

Will I ever be over how much Harvey and Mike love each other? I really don't think so. Let's talk about the best parts of the episode.

First of all, I already mentioned it above, but that scene at Mike's place was just golden. Mike walking in to find Harvey already there was great - they have always just barged in to each other's personal spaces and that's such a testament to the trust between them. And then you have Harvey telling Mike the truth, and telling him that he's going to have to go on the stand and risk getting disbarred. Mike's reaction is genuine panic, and then the two of them concoct a plan that will save the day. I just love the idea of Harvey going over there not to ask for Mike's help, but because he couldn't stand the thought of Mike thinking he didn't trust him. That's love, baby.

Then you've got the interview-in-reverse thing at the end. I could spend hours just squealing about the fact that Donna and Harvey are leaving the firm and moving to Seattle (my home town! woo!) to be with Mike and Rachel. Hey, maybe the four of them could all be in a poly relationship... but that's for fanfic to decide, I guess. Good finales need to come full circle, and also need to set the characters up for changing futures. This idea of Harvey moving to Seattle, of Mike being Harvey's boss, manages to do both. They are quippy and cute with each other, but also genuine. Harvey decides to leave the firm in order to take out Faye, but he also genuinely wants a fresh start. His life changed forever when Mike walked into his life, and I really do feel like that was the final message the show left me with, when the dust had settled.

So... yeah. I can't find it in myself to be a hardcore Darvey shipper. This finale was never going to cater to all of my needs. But at the end of the day, I was mighty pleased with several of the scenes, and I love where it left all of the characters, in terms of their careers and happiness. For this finale, I'll give a rating of...

7.5/10

For the show as a whole? Well, I hate to break it to anyone who's unaware of this, but Suits isn't that great of a show. It has a couple of really strong elements, but over the years its stories became repetitive, and there's quite a lot that doesn't actually make sense about these characters and their motivations. But I don't grade these shows based on objective quality. I grade them based on the elements that I enjoy most in a show. For years, whenever Suits came back on the air, it was one of the things I looked forward to most each week. I longed for every scrap of content between Harvey and Mike that I could possibly get. There are moments over the years that I have gone back and watched in a loop because of those two. I also liked the way the show deconstructed toxic masculinity, and had a feminist message that didn't feel like something out of an after school special. I had fun watching this show, and I will think of it fondly for years to come. The show over-all gets:

8/10

#review #suits #suits review #suits usa

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statusquoergo · 5 years

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Alright, let’s do this.

As to be expected, we open on the afterglow of the Season 8 finale. I personally found this scene to be pretty cringy, but I have actual criticisms of the current Darvey relationship that’ll come up later, so I’m going to leave it alone for now; the only thing I’ll say about the scene with Louis is that I found the heavy-handedness of the sexual innuendo to be extremely childish and tediously predictable. Oh, and the whole “Wait let’s not tell anyone right away” thing is pretty much letter for letter the same rationale that Mike and Rachel used for keeping it a secret that they had moved up their wedding date; that is to say, little to no forethought and almost guaranteed to end up Not How They Planned. No, wait, one more thing: I can only assume that Harvey’s panic about Louis finding him at Donna’s apartment is the result of sleep deprivation and delirium because dude, if you need a place to hide out for awhile, the bedroom is right down the hall. Or fuck, crouch down behind the kitchen counter, I don’t care. Hide in the bathroom. You have options.

(Okay, one more thing: “You didn’t see what was right in front of your face for 12 years.” What. I mean… Seriously, what. Does time even exist in this universe?)

Next up, Alex introduces us, in a very much not-off-the-record encounter, to what I can only assume will be the driving conflict of this season: the New York State Bar Association (NYSBA) has caught wind of the Ethics Committee hearing that ousted Robert Zane, and now they’re taking it upon themselves to restore the integrity of the firm currently known as Zane Specter Litt Wheeler Williams, by any means necessary, starting with the removal of Zane’s name from the letterhead.

This is bullshit.

The NYSBA is a voluntary agency with no actual legislative capability. As per the association’s website, “it does not license, regulate nor investigate an [attorney’s] ability to practice law.” New York Rules of Professional Conduct Rule 7.5 (Professional Notices, Letterheads, and Signs) prohibits Robert from representing himself as a practicing member of the bar, or a current partner at the firm, but it permits the firm to continue representing itself with his name, if they so choose. So the Bar Association has zero capacity to back up this stupid request, but more to the point, I have no idea why they even care. There are over 9,800 law firms currently operating in New York City; statistically, the probability that every single one of them represents the pinnacle of legalistic integrity is insanely low, and considering the amount of turnover and increasingly public turmoil at GSVD/PH/PD/PDS/PS/PSL/SL/ZSL/ZSLWW, it must be years since it’s been a remotely reputable institution.

Moving on! Samantha and Harvey land on a tangible outcome of Robert’s decision to take the fall for Donna and Harvey: The firm is hemorrhaging clients. Samantha determines that Eric Kaldor is responsible for the sudden turnaround, but honestly, I’m surprised the firm has any clients left at this point anyway. Thomas Kessler has the right idea when he walks out the door with the casual reminder that Harvey manipulated him into lying at the hearing (which, by the way, was conducted by the New York State Legislative Ethics Commission, not the Bar Association); instead of freaking out about this frankly inevitable outcome, maybe Harvey et al. should take a minute to appreciate the fact that Kessler isn’t seeking to have them all disbarred.

Special shout-out to Louis’s stellar one-liner: “I wanna check and see how bad our reputation is.” (Spoiler alert: It’s very bad.)

As it happens, Samantha is right about Kaldor because of course she is, which leads to a semi-violent encounter set at a hockey rink, for some reason, where we get to see some cracks in the purportedly strong allegiance between Samantha and Harvey, and Samantha reminds us the viewers that she’s a badass with a short temper as she shoves Kaldor up against the boards and I’m forced to wonder exactly where these claims of a unified front are coming from all of a sudden. Basically all of Season 8 was spent drawing battle lines up and down the firm, but now that Robert’s gone, they have some magical allegiance to one another? If it’s a direct result of Robert’s actions and subsequent departure, I have to assume these amicable feelings are going to fade as the adrenaline rush dies down; otherwise it’s just a convenient plot device, but to be fair, that’s pretty on-brand, so I can’t give them too much shit for it.

You know what I absolutely can give them shit for?

Darvey.

(Please, you knew this was coming.)

The first of my actual criticisms of them for this episode: Donna’s breakup with Thomas, and Harvey becoming an unwitting enabler of unfaithfulness. Way back in February, at the end of Season 8, one of the concerns aired about Donna and Harvey hooking up was that Donna was still in a relationship with Thomas, and infidelity, if I recall correctly, is a bit of a sore spot for Harvey. Korsh admitted that an explicit breakup scene was filmed for s08e16 and removed from the final cut, but the implication as I read it was that as far as the showrunners were concerned, Donna and Thomas had come to a mutual understanding that they were done and he was out of the picture, the poor guy. Not so! Now, retconning for the win, we have the privilege of watching them break up over the phone, which is of course the epitome of class.

True, that was tactless, but the real sticky wicket here is Harvey and Donna’s conversation about the breakup once it’s over and done with. Harvey is rightly alarmed at his role, but the thing that gets me, aside from how quickly he seems to just go with her assurance that everything is fine and he “didn’t do anything wrong,” is that his response to her revealing that she and Thomas were still a couple when he came over isn’t “Why didn’t you say anything,” it isn’t “Why didn’t you stop me.” It isn’t “You know how I feel about cheating.” No, it’s “I would never have.” It’s an apology.

Now, maybe this is narrow-minded of me, but I always figured that Harvey’s whole problem with cheating was the whole…cheating part. Apparently not; it seems that issues only arise when Harvey is the one doing the cheating (see: Paula [s07e11]), or in a position to accuse the cheater directly from a third-party perspective (see: Lily [s02e10], Mike [s02e12], Marcus [s08e05]). (For real, he almost beat the shit out of Mike without knowing anything beyond “there was infidelity involved here”; Mike, who was exactly in the position Harvey is in now—the third party sleeping with an otherwise involved woman—refuses to tell him how he got beaten up with no explanation but that it’s because of the story Harvey told him about Lily cheating on Gordon, and Harvey’s response is “You got off easy.”) The otherwise unattached participant gets a free pass. BUT WAIT! Harvey was furious with Bobby when he saw him with Lily (s05e10), and tried to throw him out of his parents’ house; there must be some other explanation. Maybe Donna is just the prettiest princess in all the land and the fact that it’s her doing the cheating is enough to relieve all of Harvey’s built-in trauma? Well if that isn’t just the laziest goddamn rationale I can think of. Oh, so maybe, just maybe, Harvey is going to get some real, actual therapy this season and do some honest exploration of his apparently much-more-complex-than-previously-anticipated relationship with infidelity!

Right. I bet that’s it.

It’s possible that this will come back again later in the season, but I can’t tell yet what direction they’re planning to take the Darvey trajectory, so I don’t want to start throwing out assumptions. Now that they’ve confronted it so blatantly, I hope they don’t abandon it like this, but who knows.

In the meantime, Louis is still trying to boost recruitment efforts, this time by badgering Professor Gerard into letting him be the keynote speaker at Harvard’s upcoming Ethics Conference. I don’t really have much to say about this subplot except that it’s one of the stupidest and most illogical things they could’ve come up with; can you just imagine Louis speaking at an ethics conference? Gerard is right that Harvard students won’t be snowed by Louis making some pretty speech about the firm’s integrity, and the Q&A would be a disaster! Not to mention, the conference probably has a keynote lined up already, and it’s not like there won’t be other speakers there; Louis doesn’t need to be top billing to get his five minutes, assuming anyone would listen to a single word he has to say. Oh, and am I seriously supposed to believe that they’re experiencing a sudden drop in top-tier applications now? As opposed to…the past, what, three years? Four years? However long it’s been in this nonsense timeline since Mike went to prison (after which point they were also bemoaning a lack of applicants). But actually, why wouldn’t students be applying here? If the firm is desperate for interviewees, it’s practically a sure thing that everyone will get through to the first round, so even if the students have no intention of accepting an offer, having the interview is great practice for firms where they actually care about getting a job.

Part II

#marvey #suits usa #season 9 #s09e01 #analysis

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heytheredeann · 6 years

Text

Midyear Writing Round Up

I was tagged by @frivoloussuits, thank you!

Current word count for the year: Ao3 says 98.272, whereas the various WIPs amount to 97.960 words (196.232 words total, I’m impressed LOL).

Number of stories (including drabbles) posted on AO3: (by “including drabbles” I assumed you meant that I should count drabbles as separate stories, not just one collection) 61. Which is mind-blowing for me because I’ve always been super reluctant when it comes to publishing, because I second-guess what I write like a lot, but I had promised myself that this year I’d try to overcome that by taking prompts (which pretty much forces me to publish what I write) and it worked. *proud noises*

Fandoms I wrote for (2018): Suits, Agents of SHIELD and lately Timeless.

Pairings I have written for (2018): In Suits I’ve written Mike/Harvey and these days I’m very into Harvey/Rachel; in Agents of SHIELD I’ve written a lot of Jemma/Ward, plus some Skye/Ward and Kara/Ward (also a bit of unpublished Jemma/Ward/Kara that might see the light of day, someday); in Timeless I mostly write Lucy/Flynn, plus some Flynn/Wyatt (brotp mostly) and I also have some unpublished Flynn/Rufus in a big AU I’m working on (again, brotp) aaand some Wyatt/Jessica in my WIPs.

Stories with the most kudos/bookmarks/subscriptions (2018): My post popular story by kudos, bookmarks and subscriptions is Everywhere I’m looking now, I’m surrounded by your embrace, which is a Marvey soulmates!AU (unsurprisingly, considering that Marvey is the only super popular pairing that I write for LOL) that got many requests for a sequel that I have no idea when/if I’ll deliver because I have zero Marvey inspiration of late.

Story I’m most proud of: Aaaah. I always struggle with this question. Okay, I’m gonna pick this obscure Biospecialist ficlet that I wrote back in March for a prompt. I just really enjoyed writing for that verse, both in the ficlet and in the prequel I came up with afterwards, so here, it takes the first spot because I like how it came out (also because I struggled a bit with that prompt, so).

My second proudest story this year: I’m choosing a story per fandom, because I’m suffering while choosing between my babes, okay? Okay.

In Suits I’d say They say home is where your heart is set in stone (Marvey getting-together fic/fix-it), because it’s one of the few properly slash things that I’ve published and I don’t usually write getting-together fics, it was fun and I am rather satisfied by how it came out, in retrospect.

In Agents of SHIELD I’d say... that it’s a tie between All I want is one more day (it's all I need, one more day with you) and Just to keep you warm (just to bring you home); the first because it’s pretty much a bunch of my favourite things all together LOL (Not So Shitty Grant is technically still married to Jemma, he still loves her and helps out SHIELD from time to time while he does his own thing, Jemma is pissed but not at all over him, Grant is still protective as hell of her, and Coulson is very tired and very resigned), and the second because I love hurt/comfort fics, and I loved writing some aftermath of torture, even if I think I kept it pretty light.

In Timeless I’d say Playing house in the ruins of us, probably, because as much as I love how Lucy and Flynn’s dynamic has evolved in s2 I am very fond of their weird bond in s1, and I loved writing it.

Also We're young and we're reckless (and we'll take this way too far) is an honorable mention (yes. the title is a Taylor Swift song. don’t judge me.): a small Biospecialist story with a slightly different take on the soulmates thing, and basically the reason why it’s here is that the prompt requested “Biospecialist + Grant is Jemma’s first time” and I had no idea what to do with that, because I don’t write smut. So I am very happy that I managed to come up with something that I like LOL.

What’s ahead: Uh. A lot? Again, I’ll split this in my three (current) main fandoms.

Suits: Probably a bunch of Harvey/Rachel, because that’s what I’ve been working on of late.

Agents of SHIELD: I have some stuff that I am dwelling on, mostly Jemma/Ward pieces, to nobody’s surprise, in particular one is a Framework AU that’s probably 80% Kara/Ward and one is a Biospecialist fic from an outsider’s POV (because I love that trope). And there’s the giant Jemma And Ward Are On Maveth Together WIP that. someday I’ll have to finish, I guess. Also, I have been working on the Skye/Ward Looking too closely series, but I don’t like how it’s coming out, so. uhm. we’ll see.

Timeless: ..........the prompts that I have yet to fill *insert shame here*. And also a Garcy AU in which Emma tries to erase Flynn, because I’ve been wanting to write one for ages (and I’m probably gonna throw in a Jessica Logan Redemption Arc because I can).

I’ll tag @babybrotherdean @shineyma @ilosttrackofthings @optionofpeace @caffeinewitchcraft @twilight-deviant (if you haven’t done it already and if you are up to it, of course!)

#frivoloussuits #biospecialist #marvey #garcy #harvey x rachel #tag game #not spn #ward x simmons #otp: he's shirtless and she's disapproving #aos #otp: a fool and an asshole #suits #lucy x flynn #timeless #my fanfic #ely has shit to say

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laufire · 6 years

Note

1. Harvey Specter 2. Isabelle Lightwood 3. Allison Argent

Harvey

This is another case where saying Slytherin is just too easy lol. But ambition is such an important trait of his. But I do think he has a very Gryffindor temperament at some points lol. So I’m a little divided. It’d come down to what he’d choose during the Sorting, and I’m not even fully sure of that because a lot of the characters he picks as faves can go either way too lol.

best quality: he’s whip-smart and he can turn any situation to his advantage worst quality: he’s a lying liar who lies lol.ship them with: SCOTTIE, Katrina, Samantha, Alex, Rachel, Paula, Jessica... it comes down to ANYONE BUT DONNA OR MIKE, GET THEM AWAY FROM HIM LOL.brotp them with: Louis and Robert.needs to stay away from: Donna and Mike are fucking creeps.misc. thoughts: I kinda love that he’s back to being a gunslinger instead of managing partner tbh. It’s truer to who he is and it gives him more room to be on the offensive again. I missed that.

Isabelle

Hmm. She’s another character where I could hear an argument for any House tbh (btw: I think Shadowhunter militaristic culture is extremely skewed into producing Gryffindors, but that’s another story lol), but those two are the ones I prefer for her tbh. She has certain intellectual hunger that seems to be just for the sake of it, instead of with a goal in mind, and the way she goes about winning people over/using their relationship with her (or others) to achieve her missions strikes me as kinda Slytherin.

best quality: she’s so damn full of life and joy and charisma. She’s too good for what she gets tbh.worst quality: lack of ambition and drive to be #1.ship them with: Raphael, Jonathan, Meliorn (& Raphael as ot3), Victor, Charlie a little, maybe Maia and Aline. Sometimes even Simon.brotp them with: Alec, sometimes Jace. needs to stay away from: Clary. That relationship does her no good and I’m tired of seeing her playing cheerleader to others. Tbh I have (had?) issues with her relationship with Magnus, on both ends (Isabelle was clearly willing to use Magnus’ love for Alec for their own ends and I loathe to see her play cheerleader to that ship too).misc. thoughts: I hope that at the very least, her relationship with Simon is used to bring back on full focus her issues with addiction, because that storyline was literally the only time she was written for herself tbh.

Allison

The Argents are one of the most Gryffindor motherfuckers ever okay. I have a lot of thoughts about how certain upbringings are more likely to bring Gryffindors, as I said above, and this is one of those cases lol.

best quality: she always put herself back together, marched ahead, and dared the rest of the world to catch up with her.worst quality: her need to prove herself and handle things on her own lead to her death, so.ship them with: Scott, Derek, Erica, Boyd, Isaac, Jackson, Marin, Peter (yeah whatevs. I like fucked up things assholes). I used to ship her with Lydia and Stiles too, but that’s soured from then because I Blame Stiles For Everything lol. I also have an insane amount of polyships in this show, back in s1-3a where I loooooved almost everything about it lol. Allison/Derek/Scott was the main one.brotp them with: Kate, Chris. Used to with Lydia and Stiles too.needs to stay away from: I mean, distance from the likes of Victoria and Gerard would’ve been good for her, but I loved those relationships too.misc. thoughts: one day I’ll finish the resurrection fic (with that Allison/Derek/Scott ot3 I mentioned, but also Allison/everyone Because) that’s been on my backups for years lol.

#harvey specter #isabelle lightwood #allison argent #replies #talking to the void #my thoughts #suits (usa)#shadowhunters #teen wolf #suits thoughts #sh thoughts #tw thoughts #hp sorting #Anonymous

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deborahdeshoftim5779 · 6 years

Text

Suits Episode 1 x 08 Analysis Part II

(Continued from Part I).

“You know, real musicians? They don’t wear eyeliner.”

Got to love that.

What I don’t love is Harvey once again lording it over Lewis and overruling all his ideas.

Now we come to the first meeting between Michael and Lola, which is what I really want to discuss.

First of all, reality check: unless Columbia University allows visitors during the semester, then how on earth did Michael Ross get in? What’s more mysterious is that Michael checks the fake ID before coming up to Lola. This must mean that he enquired after Lola at the university-- presumably under her real name, since the fake name is linked with an employee at her father’s company. Do universities in America allow you to walk in, looking for another student?

Perhaps he got this information from Mr. Jensen.

Now despite Michael’s lapse in judgement earlier, he does come fully prepared for his meeting with Lola and completely catches her off-guard. She plays it cool and correctly guesses that he comes from Pearson Hardman. That’s quite interesting, because she would be in serious trouble had Michael come from the FBI. Why does she play it so cool, then? Why does she know that Michael comes from Pearson Hardman? This seems strange behaviour, given the gravity of forging government documents.

Could it be that she did not accidentally drop her fake ID at a friend’s bar mitzvah? Was she intending for her father to find it? If so, that would explain how she knew that Michael was from Pearson Hardman. It would certainly explain why she seemed so cool about him holding her fake Driving Licence AND why she continued to test samples and embezzle from her father’s company despite not having said fake ID.

If she did accidentally drop it and then saw it in the hands of a stranger, she must have been panicking-- and, judging by her later actions, planning her next move.

Watch what happens next:

“You know, forging a government document like this after 9/11 is next to impossible.”

“God, there must have been a glitch at the DMV!”

Michael laughs. He laughs!

Think about this. His earlier comment would have sounded as though he wanted to shock her into making a confession. But after laughing when she practically confesses to hacking a state government system and forging identity documents, it is revealed that he actually admires what she did! Look at his expression. He is impressed by her audacity. Not only that, but he is silenced and lost for an answer. Instead, he seems to ponder what she has just said, and she must revive the conversation-- even though she evidently has no pleasure in doing so.

Am I the only one who thinks this speaks volumes?

“Why d’you come here?”

“Your father came to us, ‘cos he’s worried about you.”

“If he’s that worried, he’d be here himself; he wouldn’t have sent an empty suit.”

It is never explained why Jensen and Lola’s relationship is so rocky. This would have provided some context to the plot and depth to Lola’s character. My main problem with this episode is that she is typecast as a poor little girl whose main problem is her Daddy, when it’s dead obvious that she has other concerns-- as I will explain later.

Furthermore, it simply doesn’t make sense that Lola would go to the trouble of embezzling money from her father’s company because she had a rocky relationship with her father. Children who want their parents’ attention usually choose personal stunts. They might run away. Lola hasn’t done this. They might date somebody their parents strongly dislike. Lola hasn’t done this. They might threaten to hurt themselves. Lola hasn’t done this. They might turn to illegal drugs. Lola hasn’t done this.

She is so deeply wounded by the breakdown in her relationship with her father that she turns to… embezzlement? Even sets up a fake company? Sorry, I just don’t buy that.

Now, if Lola has to embezzle from Clarity Drilling to get her father’s attention, that might give a hint as to what kind of father Jensen is.

But if so, then why?

See, if we had some context about Lola’s mother, some of these issues might have been cleared up. If Lola was hurting her father to avenge her mother, that would make sense.

The problem with the Lola storyline is that it completely dilutes her professed motives which are actually sound and logical, not to mention the fact that they add a likeable component to her rather unlikeable character.

“If he’s that worried, he’d be here himself; he wouldn’t have sent an empty suit.”

Suppose this implies Lola’s anger that her father spends too much time on his company and not enough time on her. It probably does. But again, I am given no reason why, nor how she learned to hack government databases.

Anyway, when Lola calls Michael an empty suit, watch his reaction: he’s taken aback, insulted and has to collect himself together.

Now, think about this. Michael has faced a number of insults. Lewis is a jerk, so is Harvey, Jessica barely gives him a second glance, Donna can run rings around him (see 1 x 07 in the mock trial), and Rachel Zane rebuffs him every chance she gets. Furthermore, Lola Jensen is the client’s daughter, someone with no connection to him whatsoever. So why does he appear so stunned when she calls him an “empty suit”?

(Not so sweet now, is she, Mike!)

He takes it so personally and his next words prove it:

“You don’t know anything about me!”

This is rather a defensive comment. It sounds like he is trying to defend his integrity. Now if Harvey had handled this investigation, I am sure he would have blown off Lola’s attitude and cut to the chase. Michael, on the other hand, allows her insult to get to him and must refute it before continuing with his investigation.

Small signs, but significant.

By the way, does Lola expect to shake Michael off her tail during this meeting? From her sulky looks, it appears not. It’s a shame we don’t know what she is thinking, because she is far too intelligent to let a lawyer outwit her.

“You’re stealing money from your father’s company. A couple million, so far? I don’t need to know why, but I do need you to return it-- now.”

Harvey Specter is currently trying to get Maslow to confess to massive embezzlement charges. It’s ironic that Michael has no interest in why Lola is also committing embezzlement. Yes, Mr. Jensen told Harvey not to pry, but for someone as curious as Michael-- particularly where Lola is concerned-- his non-curiosity is surprising.

“Actually, you do need to know why.”

See: this is my problem. Lola proceeds to give an accurate, scientific explanation for why she is going after her father’s company. She has gone to the trouble of collecting samples and even hacking into classified company data in order to get graphs that will prove her case. This is a well-oiled operation, possibly planned for months in advance. It is not the kind of rash decision designed to gain quick attention at all-- which seems more likely if family troubles were her driving motive.

And we are to believe that she is doing this just because she has father issues? The passion in her voice, her expansive knowledge of the subject, her disciplined investigation, and her underlying moral motives (though heavily flawed) simply does not support that conclusion. Instead, it does her an injustice as a character. I’m watching this episode on Netflix, and this episode is called “Identity Crisis”, with a summary saying that Michael Ross has to reign in a “modern day Robin Hood”.

Anyone with the faintest idea about English folklore knows that Robin Hood robbed the rich to feed the poor. So why have this summary for the episode but reduce Lola’s motivations to family issues? Of course, family issues can be part of the problem. But they are completely unexplained, whilst her investigations, methodology, reasoning, and intended actions after embezzling from her father are explained to the letter.

And by the way, when Lola says, “Actually, you do need to know why,” have you noticed that her tone loses its sarcasm and sulky disrespect? Have you noticed that she takes off her gloves, looks him in the eye directly without contempt, and immediately launches into an impassioned statement about her motives? Sure, she might be unwilling to discuss her rocky relationship with her father to a complete stranger, but would she even communicate with him if her only motive were family problems? No-- rather, I get the sense that she has wanted to explain herself for a while and seized the first opportunity to do so.

Meaning that her main motive is concern for the environment, and she is trying to get back at her father’s neglect of her and the environment. Why? Well, the family part is unexplained. But the environment part is well-explained.

“How did you get that-- that’s classified company data.”

“I’m good with computers.”

That always makes me laugh now.

Watch Michael’s reaction: he’s speechless for a moment, and then the whole Locksley LLC dawns on him, leading to a renewal of his admiration for Lola Jensen. He’s smiling as he figures it out! This is a totally inappropriate reaction to someone whose crimes could see her completing her degree behind bars.

“These toxins are known to cause kidney failure, liver cancer, and infertility.”

And this is just about daddy issues. Come on.

Her voice rises-- she doesn’t even take any credit for the Robin Hood idea. No, it’s all about the harm her father’s company is causing.

“I’m not giving the money back: I’m giving it away.”

Michael is speechless as he faces the real possibility of failure (never an option), whilst Lola slams down her laptop in triumph and walks off.

An incredible scene, folks.

More discussion to follow shortly.

#Suits #MichaelRoss #HarveySpecter #JessicaPearson #LewisLitt #LolaJensen #PearsonHardman #DonnaPaulsen

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darveymficprompts · 6 years

Text

Donna & Harvey getting carried away in the pool of a hotel on their first business trip as a couple.

Donna and Harvey go skinny dipping.

“Immersed”

“How was your flight?”

“It was good.” Harvey smiles, glancing over at the redhead, his redhead, currently checking them in at the front desk of the hotel they’d just arrived at.

“I’ll bet.” Jessica teases from the other end of the line.

Harvey and Donna had flown in to Chicago to help Jessica as she prepared to enter the world of Chicago politics; it had been a last-minute decision, Jessica had been surprised by an impromptu encounter with the Mayor of Chicago, who had invited her to a meeting the following day with numerous Chicago political figures, a meeting Jessica had asked Harvey to accompany her to.

“I’m choosing to believe you’re referring to service in first class.” Harvey smirks.

“You do that.” Jessica teases.

“Donna said she sent you through the press release you asked for?”

“Yeah, tell her thank you, Jeff is going to send it out tomorrow.”

“What time is the meeting tomorrow?” He asks.

“Ten,” Jessica confirms, “You know you could have just stayed with us, Harvey.”

“I know, and thank you, I just wanted…” He attempts to explain.

“You wanted to be alone,” His old mentor finishes for him, “I get it. How are things with you two now that you’ve finally opened your eyes?”

“Great.” Harvey smiles, glancing back towards his girl, “everything’s great.”

‘Got the key’ Donna mouths, walking through the lobby towards him with the room key in her hand.

“Good, I’ll see you tomorrow, Harvey. I’ve arranged for a car to pick you both up at 9.30.”

“We’ll see you then.” He says, hanging up the phone.

“Ready?” Donna smiles “…I really shouldn’t have been surprised that you booked the most expensive suite in hotel, should I?”

“Thought you were supposed to know everything?” He teases, leaning down to place a soft kiss against her lips.

- - -

It had taken them a while, but they were finally in a good place, a wonderful place, they were finally together and incredibly happy. What had only been three months ago felt like it had taken place a lifetime ago.

After Donna had kissed him, to say thing went from confused to chaos would be an understatement. In true Specter form, void of any emotional maturity and without Donna’s guidance, Harvey had not handled the situation well at all. Even after he had broken up with Paula, weeks of anger, confusion and guilt laced with harsh words, constant fighting and bitterness had culminated in what Harvey could only describe as one of the worst moments in his life; Donna left him.

** FLASHBACK**

Returning to the firm after a meeting with Louis, Harvey was greeted by a solemn Mike standing in the doorway of his office.

“Harvey, you need to see this.”

“Not now, Mike.”

“Now, Harvey. Trust me. I found this on Donna’s Desk, I thought it was something she’d been working on for me”

“What is it?” Harvey asks, ignoring the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach, his brows knitting together in confusion.”

“You need to fix this, Harvey.” Mike says seriously, handing the piece of paper to the older lawyer.

Harvey identifies it immediately; a resignation letter, with a hand written not attached to it, he swallows thickly as he begins to read.

Dear Harvey and Louis,

Please be advised of my intention to resign as Chief Operations Officer of Specter Litt, effective immediately.

I greatly appreciate the opportunity and privilege that has been extended to me during my time at the firm and while this decision is an extremely difficult one, it is necessary.

I am grateful for your friendship, support and guidance and the tireless efforts of all staff within the offices of Specter Litt. I wish you all well in your future endeavours.

Sincerely,

Donna Paulsen

Harvey could feel the familiar tightening of his chest that accompanied a panic attack, he willed himself to continue reading the note, praying that this was just a dream.

Harvey,

I just can’t do this anymore; I have decided to leave New York, I’ve been offered an opportunity elsewhere and have decided to take it. I just need a fresh start.

I want you to know that I am not sorry I kissed you, I’m in love with you and if I’m being completely honest, I would do it again. But, I am sorry that our relationship couldn’t withstand it and that because of my actions, trying to figure out my own feelings, you now look at me with a look that was once only reserved for your Mother, a mixture of pain, betrayal and disgust.

I know I’ve let you down, but I never meant to hurt you, please know that.

Perhaps in my absence it will be easier for you to rekindle things with Dr Agard.

Be happy, Harvey, that’s all I want for you.

Donna.

He closes his eyes, dizziness taking over as he struggles to breathe. As he glances back down at the paper, he notices his hands are shaking.

This can’t be happening.

“She’s on her way to JFK”

He looks up to find Rachel standing inside the doorway.

“…She’s moving to Seattle.” She offers.

“She …She won’t want to see me,” Harvey argues weakly, “I’ve fucked everything up, Rachel.”

“Yeah, you have, Harvey…” Rachel says, “…and maybe you don’t deserve the opportunity to fix it, but she does! Donna deserves it and you are the only person who is going to be able to change this.”

Before Rachel can say another word, Harvey finds himself racing towards the elevator, still clutching the papers in his hand. The elevator doors open to the lobby and he runs towards the exit, looking out towards the street. The cool night air hits him as he steps outside, flagging down the first cab he sees, “JFK” He tells the driver as he climbs in.

He has to find her.

- - -

“American Airlines flight AA45 to Seattle now boarding.”

Donna had been sitting near the boarding gate, waiting for her flight to be announced, as she hears her flight number she stands and collects her purse, coat and carry on bag, turning around to head towards the desk she takes a step forward before she spots him, jogging towards her. Harvey.

“Donna”

“Harvey what are you doing here? How did you…”

“Rachel.” He explains.

“Harvey, I…”

“Don’t go!” He begs, “Please. Donna you can’t leave.”

She scoffs, “We haven’t spoken in weeks unless its been you yelling at me about something!”

“I know, I’m sorry, I am. I just…”

“In the fourteen years I’ve known you, Harvey, I never thought we’d end up here; you hating me!”

“Donna…” He begins, taken aback by her statement.

“No, Harvey,” She interjects, “I’m not doing this! I’ve said what I needed to, and I have a flight to catch, so…” she says, brushing past him.

He grabs her arm, halting her movements, “I don’t hate you…” He says softly.

“Really? Because last I checked, the way you have treated me in the last two weeks is exactly the way you would act towards someone you couldn’t stand!”

“You really don’t get it do you?” He says, shaking his head in disbelief.

“Oh, I get it, Harvey, you’ve made yourself crystal clear. I’m selfish for doing what I did and putting you in that position, selfish for putting myself first and making you cheat. Believe me, I get it!”

“I was mad at myself!” Harvey says, exasperated. “I wasn’t mad because I didn’t want you, Donna, I was mad because I did!” He explains.

“…Ever since my Mom cheated on my Dad, I have always known I have zero tolerance of infidelity. Then, you ambush me with a kiss…”

“I told you, I had…” She tries to defend.

“Just spoken with Louis, I know. Let me finish, please.” He begs.

Donna nods.

“Then you kissed me in your office and for the first time ever, infidelity didn’t bother me. My head was spinning, and I was surprised, Donna, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t want to have you right there on your desk.”

“Harvey…”

“I didn’t know how to deal with it. I took it out on you and I’m sorry.”

Donna can feel the tears building, “Why didn’t you just talk to me?” She asks.

“You know I’m no good with talking about feelings.” He offers weakly. “… But I do love you, Donna.”

“Harvey…”

“Final boarding call for American Airlines flight AA45 to Seattle.”

Harvey can feel his heart racing, uneasy that she hasn’t agreed to stay yet, he quickly pulls her towards him, pressing his lips against hers, kissing her gently as he cups her face.

“Please don’t go” He begs. “…I love you.”

“Ma’am, I’m sorry to interrupt, are you boarding?” The flight attendant asks.

Donna sighs, pressing her cheek harder against Harvey’s hand.

“I’m sorry.”

“Donna…” He whispers, frowning slightly.

“It’s too late,” She whispers, tear filled eyes looking up at him, “I love you, but you can’t …We can’t …I have to go.”

“Donna.”

“Goodbye, Harvey.”

- - -

Harvey sighs, slumping back in his chair, finishing the last of the Macallan in his glass, fighting against the burn in his throat. Internally debating whether to head back to the firm or to just drink himself in to a stupor, attempting to forget the last few hours.

The latter wins.

She left, she actually left him. He’s not quite sure he believes it yet.

He ignores the buzz of his cell phone, probably just Mike checking on him again, he reasons. As he approaches his bar for a refill, noticing he’s used the last of it,

“Fuck” He mumbles to himself.

He reaches for his keys as he resolves to head to the liquor store, the walk will probably do him some good, give him a chance to clear his head.

Grabbing his coat, he opens the door, surprised by the figure standing on the other side of it.

“Donna.” He breathes, internally asking himself if he’s seeing things now.

“Say it again.” She demands, eyes still laced with tears.

He doesn’t need her to clarify what she means.

“I love you.” He says adamantly, certain he’s never spoken a truer word in his life.

Before he can repeat the words again in an effort to make her believe them, her lips crash against his as she kisses him passionately. He pulls her in closely, holding her body against his own as he kisses her back with everything he has.

There is not a chance in hell that he’ll ever let her go again.

** END OF FLASHBACK **

- - -

“This place is gorgeous.” Donna says, unpacking their suitcase.

“You’re gorgeous!” He says, his arms encircling her waist as he hugs her from behind, kissing her neck.

“Smooth, Specter.” She chuckles. “How you are New York’s best closer I have no idea!”

“Oh, I think you do.” He smirks, sitting down on the bed beside her.

“THAT, better not have anything to do with it, mister.” She says, narrowing her eyes at him slightly.

“Don’t worry, THAT is reserved solely for my lady, the others just succumb to my good looks and charm.” He grins.

“…And ego” She adds, teasing him further.

“You love me.”

“I do.” She agrees, leaning down for a quick kiss.

It had surprised both of them how natural the transition from friends, well, their version of friends, to lovers had been. PDA, stolen kisses, declarations of love, it all just felt so right. With fourteen years to make up for, they had practically locked themselves away the entire first week they were together, nothing but sex and each other, with occasional breaks for food and sleep.

“Oh, thank God, I’m starving!” Donna praises as she hears a knock on the door followed by a voice saying it was the room service they’d ordered. “Honey, can you get it? I just want to hang these last few things up,” She asks.

Harvey opens the door and accepts the food, tipping the man generously.

“Hey, where’s the pool in this place?” He queries.

“First floor, last door on the left.” The hotel worker explains, “But unfortunately it’s closed now, Sir”

“What would I have to do to open it for us a little later?” Harvey asks, offering the man $100.

“I’m sure we can arrange something.”

“Oh, and this is to make sure we’re left alone.” Harvey instructs, offering him another $100.

“Yes, Sir. I’ll make sure that happens.”

- - -

“Harvey, where are you taking me?” Donna asks, holding Harvey’s hand as his other one covers her eyes.

“You said to get in our robes because we are getting massages, the spa is in the other direction!”

“I’m covering your eyes” He laughs “How do you know what direction we’re going?”

“I’m Donna” She smirks.

He can’t help but roll his eyes at her sassiness.

“Ok, we’re here he says, uncovering her eyes to reveal the swimming pool in front of them, the room darkened except for the glow illuminating from the underwater pool lights.

“We’re not getting massages, are we?” She asks, kinking an eyebrow at him, still holding his hand.

“Nope, not tonight anyway,” He smirks “Although, if you’re lucky I might give you one later.”

She smirks at his sexual innuendo.

“I thought it might be nice to have a swim.” He says, pointing towards the water.

“I don’t have my suit.” She shrugs.

“Hmm” He pretends to ponder, “Neither do I.” He says, dropping his robe to the floor to reveal his naked form.

She automatically bites her lip as her eyes take in his body.

Damn she has a sexy man!

“Harvey!” She grins, “what if someone comes?”

“You mean besides you?” He teases, earning himself a big smile from her. “So?” He shrugs, “Let them watch” He grins.

She subconsciously bites her lip again as she tries to decide whether to join him.

As if she isn’t going to she thinks to herself as she lets her robe fall to the floor next to his.

She smiles at him, shrugging her shoulders as she moves towards the pool, descending the steps in to the water with a giggle, Harvey close behind her.

Donna wades deeper in to the pool, turning around to face Harvey, her breasts still exposed as the water touches just underneath them. He moves to meet her, clutching her face in his hands as he kisses her passionately.

Harvey moves his hand down her neck, towards her breast, squeezing it firmly as her fingers dig deeper in to his back. His hand travels from her breast, down her toned stomach to her thigh as he assists her when she instinctively wraps her legs around his waist; a soft moan escapes her as she feels his deliciously hard length rub against her.

Donna pushes against his torso, freeing herself from his grasp as she swims away underwater; Harvey naturally following her. When she reaches the end of the pool she turns around, swimming back towards him, his hands automatically reaching out for her as she swims back in to his embrace; gripping his head as he pulls her towards him for another kiss.

They slowly move to the surface, searching for oxygen, water cascading over the muscles of his back as he reaches the surface first, pulling her up with him, only breaking their kiss to allow oxygen in to their lungs. His hands move to her waist, lifting her slightly as she wraps her legs around him once more, allowing him to slide inside her this time.

The feeling of him stretching her elicits a whimper from her, as he begins to move inside her slowly; her grip on him tightening with each languid thrust.

“So fucking tight” He moans against her mouth as she steadies herself by grabbing his shoulder, his hands move from her face to her torso as she wraps her arms around him tightly.

“God, you feel so good” She murmurs against his lips before her tongue begs for entrance to his mouth. Her hand grips his hair tightly, appreciating every thrust inside her as she relishes each touch.

Harvey’s tongue moves against her own before breaking away, instructing her to take a breath before pulling her underneath the water with him, his hand finding her clit to rub firmly.

Donna has never felt anything like it, briefly removing something as vital as breathing somehow enhances every other sense she has, overwhelmed by complete euphoria has Harvey continues his actions.

“Oh fuck” He breathes as they come up for air.

“Yes! Fuck, Harvey,” She moans, gripping his back tightly, “Come for me” She demands against his mouth, their hot breaths mingling. “I want you to come for me.”

Donna’s back hits the side of the pool as Harvey pins her against the wall, one hand gripping her waist tightly while the other rubs her clit as he continues to fuck her as hard as he can.

The sound of Donna’s moans echo through the room as she hits her peak, her orgasm ripping through her as Harvey begins to unravel himself, his moans overtaking her own as he manages a few more thrusts before emptying inside her.

“Oh, my Gooood” she drawls out, struggling to steady her breathing as he attempts to regulate his own. “That was amazing.” She moans, utterly satisfied.

“I love you baby” He says softly, pressing soft kisses against her lips.

“I love you too”

As they regain their composure, Harvey pulls out of her gently.

“How do I let you talk me in to these things?” She giggles.

“Told you babe, good looks and charm” He winks, offering her his trademark grin.

“I am definitely in trouble then” She whispers, pressing her lips against his softly.

#darvey #darveyfic #suits #donnaandharvey #donna paulsen #harvey specter #oneshot #m rated #author:thedonnaspecter

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darveyfics · 6 years

Note

Harvey finds Donna drunk and emotional at his apartment door when he comes back from work one night. Love your fics! xo

“Turning Back to Sad”

Whisky on ice, Sunset and Vine,You’ve ruined my life, by not being mine

Harvey shuffles his feet as he makes his way out of the elevator, head cast downward, counting his steps in a futile attempt to distract himself from his thoughts.

It had been a slow day at work, a rarity these days. He would’ve welcomed that some odd years ago, taking advantage of any moment he had to take a breather and enjoy the silence within the walls of the firm. He would’ve found himself in an extended bickering match with Donna, an already everyday occurrence, seeming just a tad more special for the mere fact they could exchange some shop talk. But this year….

He knows he’s screwed up… for an array of reasons. One whole week since she had kissed him and he doesn’t know what was worse- their moments of awkward and tense-filled silence, or the ones that ended with them arguing, spitting out words that cut just a little too deep. In today’s case, considering it was a slower one, he had barely seen her. Their eyes had met briefly walking down the halls of the soon to be Specter Litt a couple of times, but no words had been exchanged. They hadn’t needed to consult on any pressing matters, although the two had resorted to using Louis as a buffer lately- the other name partner knowing something had happened between them, yet uncharacteristically choosing not to question it.

No one knew what had happened, except maybe Rachel and Mike. Harvey had an inkling Donna had told her best friend and thus, had shared the news with her fiancé, but he couldn’t be sure. Mike had asked him if Donna had talked to him, causing Harvey to snap at him, telling him to mind your own goddamn business. Despite it, the younger man had informed Harvey that Donna had left for an early dinner with Rachel that day, after noticing the way Harvey looked wistfully at Donna’s empty office.

Now it was nearing eleven o’clock at night, and if at all possible, he felt even more like shit than he had when he woke up that morning. Dragging his feet the last couple of steps before reaching his door, he stops short when his eyes meet a pair of familiar black Louis Vuittons. He slowly scans over the long pair of legs attached to the heels, throat going dry when he sees the black dress he’d seen on her earlier that day, eyes finally landing on red hair and a look on her face that nearly makes his knees buckle.

“Donna.” He hates the way her name sounds foreign on his lips, noticing the way her tired eyes meet his in her current seated position, right outside his door.

“Har-vey.” She drawls out his name into two long syllables, almost like she’s testing out the word for the first time.

“What- what the hell are you doing here?” Harvey manages to ask despite his mind going completely blank in that moment.

Donna turns her head to the side, then the other, studying her surroundings for a while with furrowed eyebrows before she settles her eyes on his again. “I’m sitting down,” a low laugh escapes her before she scrunches up her nose, “you know, you walk kinda funny.”

Harvey’s forehead creases, a realization hitting him, “Are you drunk?”

“I’m-“ a hiccup escapes her, “possibly not sober.” She gives him a lazy smile.

Great. Of all the things Harvey expected to encounter when he woke up that morning- another fight with his former assistant making the top of that list- seeing said woman right in front of his door, drunk, didn’t even make the cut.

Harvey sighs, eyes closing momentarily to gather his thoughts, trying to fathom what the hell he was supposed to do in that moment.

“I thought- you were out with Rachel?” Harvey finally questions, wondering where her best friend currently was.

It takes Donna a moment to decipher his words, “I was.” she finally speaks, voice a tad less chipper than when he had first approached her.

“And she just- left you here?” He tries to understand the situation at hand, mind running a mile a minute. He knew Rachel wouldn’t leave her drunk friend alone, even if it was just outside of his apartment, and especially not if she knew what their current situation was. Not unless Rachel had been more or so equally intoxicated….

“I told her to leave me here, Harvey,” her eyes narrow at him, appearing darker suddenly in the dimly lit hallway, “besides,” she tries to stand up then, hands grasping at air as she fails to stand up, “why the hell do you care?” Her words start to slur as she stumbles when she reaches for the doorknob behind her. When her heels slip on the floor beneath her, making her lose her balance, Harvey is there in an instant, arms grabbing hold of her waist, steadying her against him.

“Let go of me!” Donna swats his hands away, stepping back from him as if suddenly caught on fire.

Harvey instantly feels a cold shock go through him, brows furrowed as he watches the woman he’s considered his best friend for over a decade look at him like a total stranger.

“Donna,” he tries to reach for her, hoping to steady her again, lest she fall.

She shakes her head, eyes reddening with the force of not letting herself cry. “Don’t,” she grits her teeth, “you don’t get to do that.”

“Do what?” He asks softly, concern written in his features as he watches her struggling.

“Don’t touch me, don’t act like you care when you don’t.” Donna spits out, eyes piercing straight through his, glossed over with unshed tears.

He swallows back a sharpened pain in the back of his throat. He’s never seen her this- broken. He’s seen her cry over the years, for different reasons, each time hurting him more than the last. And if there was one thing Harvey knew he couldn’t handle, was a crying Donna. It always broke him, but right now, seeing her like this, it was killing him.

“Donna, let’s get you inside.” He tries again, his voice somehow remaining steady against the rapid beating of his heart.

She snorts, the noise making him lose track of the situation again. “I almost went inside when I got here,” she takes a moment to steady her gaze on him, a sudden dizziness looming over her, “until I realized I didn’t have my- your- keys anymore because you gave them to her,” she lets out a dry laugh, “but I was the one to give them back to you first, so you know, maybe it is my fault.”

Harvey watches her in half curiosity and half horror, her words sinking in him. How could she possibly know that he had given her keys to Paula? She’s Donna, she knows everything, a little voice reminds him. But instead of addressing that, he decides to ask her about something that was now gnawing at him.

“What was your fault?” He asks her softly.

“Everything.” She laughs again, another hiccup following. Despite the few feet of distance that now separated them, he could smell the alcohol on her breath. He takes her in then, hair loose in messy waves, face flushed and eyes dilated with anger and adrenaline coursing through her.

“I mean, I just had to kiss you, didn’t I?” She shakes her head, “and you-” she pokes his chest with her index finger, “had to kiss me back, even though you said you didn’t feel anything, so, maybe I don’t know everything.”

Harvey watches her shrugging, a defeat in her demeanor as she stares at him with saddened eyes. A vile taste meets his tongue then, seeing her mental struggle behind dark hazel eyes.

“Donna, let’s go inside, we’ll talk about this in the morning, okay?” He tries again, voice low, hoping it would coax her into agreeing with him. Despite all their arguments in the last week, they hadn’t actually talked about everything that had happened. He had barked at her nine out of ten times, watching as she refused to back down and threw his words and actions back at him full throttle. They’d held a blame game that week, or more-so he had kept the blame going. Because that was somehow easier facing his own damn emotions.

She shakes her head again, slipping slightly as she takes another step back. “I screwed up, okay?” Her voice shakes when she speaks again, “I thought… God, I’m such an idiot!” She lets out a humorless laugh, “I though you could finally see what the hell it was that I wanted, that I wanted you.”

Harvey stays rooted to the spot, a piano sized weight on his shoulders numbing his entire body. He notices her eyes glazing more over time, swallowing back knives when she finally lets a few tears escape.

“I mean, maybe I wasn’t clear enough the first time, when I told you I wanted more,” her hand meets his doorknob, trying to remain balanced without any help from him, “but you missed the signal and then you went ahead and started fucking your therapist.”

“Donna,” In truth, he doesn’t know he can find the words in that moment, doesn’t know what he’s supposed to say when he can’t even mentally string along a good reason for anything he’s done in the last week, in the last couple of months. Plus, she’s drunk, he doesn’t doubt she means everything she’s saying, but he still feels like he’s witnessing something he shouldn’t.

“I wanted you to be happy,” she stands up straighter now, taking a moment to steady herself before walking two steps in his direction, “but I was selfish for once, Harvey, once in thirteen goddamn years and all I wanted was for you to be happy with me.”

His throat is completely dry now, continuously swallowing back the tears the threaten to overcome him. He nearly flinches when he feels her hands on him, palms flat against his suit- he wouldn’t have been surprised if she had slapped him across the face. It’s what you deserve, a little voice tells him.

Her eyes search his through her near blurred vision, her voice a mere whisper when she speaks. “I hate that I love you.”

He feels himself sinking then, deeper into the ground to the point he can no longer breathe. The only thing he can do is stare at her dumbly, a daze clouding his ability to speak, to think.

“I hate that I love you, because it hurts,” her hands grip the lapels of his coat, pulling him slightly toward her. It causes him to lose his footing and he holds onto her waist to steady himself.

Instead of flinching and backing up like she did earlier, Donna lets the rest of her tears fall, closing her eyes as the emotions start spilling out of her. “Goddamnit, Harvey. I fucking hate that I fell in love with you. I tried so damn hard not to, but you’re you,” she shoves her hands into his chest, the motion barely physically phasing him, considering her current state, “and I’m Donna, I’m supposed to know everything, so I should’ve know better,” her laugh is watery against him, trying her best to keep herself afloat, “I just- I thought maybe you could feel the same, for me, but now I know you don’t so,” she attempts to move then, pulling apart from him so she could head out. Her heel gets caught on the strap of her purse that’s on the floor, making her nearly fall.

His arms are around her in an instant again, holding up upright. It takes her less than a full second to shove him away again, the movements weak with the alcohol coursing through her bloodstream.

“Stop, stop it!” She yells at him, the words messy yet loud on her lips, “Stop touching me, stop looking at me, that way,” her eyes meet his for a split second, noticing how they’re wide with concern, “stop pretending you give a shit about me when you don’t.” Her face crumples completely, her shoves becoming weaker with each new sob that reverberates through her.

Harvey never loses his hold on her, keeping her upright with his hands on her arms. He feels like someone just ran him over with a steam roller, his chest tight with too many emotions- anger at himself being at the forefront.

“Donna,” her name is a plead and an apology all in one, voice hoarse with the tears he fails to keep at bay, “Donna, hey, hey,” he pulls her toward him, surprised when she stops fighting him and her head meets his chest on a loud sob, “Hey, it’s okay,” he tries to believe his own words when he voices them, yet knows it does nothing to dull her current pain.

“No, it’s not,” she cries back, hands fisting the material of his coat, her tears staining it in the process.

Harvey tries to breathe through the sharp pain currently piercing through his chest, right into his heart. He hasn’t had a panic attack in a while, and he thinks the only reason he’s not having one now is because there’s no way he can let go of Donna in that moment. So he bites through the the pain and holds her tighter against him, his left hand caught in her messy copper waves as he tries his to soothe her.

He was never good with words, not outside the courtroom or firm walls, at least. He doesn’t even think he’s ever held her like this before, his best friend, and he immediately feels a hundred times more guilty. He knows he screwed up, knows he told her things in the past week that he would much rather forget about. But he had just been so angry after she had kissed him… angry because he was confused. He had spent the better part of the last few months living in denial, and when she had kissed him, when he had kissed her back, reality had struck him hard and fast, making him lose conscious and sanity and any semblance of civility. Angry and hurtful words had left his lips, all directed at her,

“…turning me into a cheater…”

He didn’t know what the worst of it was, he just knows he won’t ever forget the look she had given him when he blamed her, practically throwing her under the bus in the presence of being forced to face the emotions and feelings he wasn’t anywhere near ready to confront. She had called him an asshole, a goddamn imbecile, and he doesn’t think he’s ever felt those words ring true then they did in that very moment, with her body draped over him, sobs echoing through his ears in a way he doubts he will ever not let those sounds prevent him from sleeping again. It was all his goddamn fault.

“Donna,” he clears his throat when he hears the rasp in his voice, “hey, listen to me,” her sobs had only barely subsided, body shaking- or shivering- against him. It only makes him wrap his arms around her, a mere attempt to keep her warm and safe. “It is not your fault,” He doesn’t think now is the best time to tell her this, considering there’s a good chance she may not remember, but still, he tries because he can’t not tell her, “You did nothing wrong, okay? I’m the idiot here. I don’t- I don’t deserve you.” He whispers into her ear.

The tears he had been trying to hold back break free in an instant and he shuffles his feet just slightly, trying to gain any semblance of control.

“I fucked up, I royally screwed things up, and I am so so sorry.” Just as he was never good with words, Harvey was never good at apologies either. As soon as he utters the words against her, he knows they sound lame and flat, realizing that no matter how many times he may tell her, they won’t ever be enough.

He waits for a reaction from her, and when he doesn’t get one in return he shifts her body against him, immediately noticing how she was practically dead weight now.

“Donna?” His voice is all concern, eyes furrowed as worry seeps deeper into him. As carefully as he could in his position, he places his hand under her chin, turning her face toward him.

A sigh escapes his lips when he notices her eyes are closed. She fell asleep crying in his arms. He realizes the exhaustion from the day, along with God knows how many drinks of alcohol she consumed that night, had finally seeped deep enough into her.

He curses under his breath as he looks around, trying to form a feasible plan without jostling her too much.

“Donna? Donna, can you wake up for me?” When he gets no response he sighs, shifting her against him as best he could in order to fish out the keys from his pocket. He’s thankful that they were a mere two feet from his door, and it only takes him three attempts before he unlocks it.

“Okay, I know you’re probably going to want to murder me for this, but,” he sucks in some air before he uses all his strength to pick her up, his right arm finding their place under his knees as his other one supports her back. Her head automatically finds its place against his chest, mouth parted slightly, staining his coat with her red lipstick.

Ignoring the pain in his lower back, he guides her to his couch, carefully making sure she’s situation enough that she won’t be able to roll over and fall.

He heads back to the hallway outside his door in a flash, collecting her purse before returning inside. He sets the black Marni bag on the counter before making his way to her again.

“Shit, Donna.” His eyes skim over her pale form, cheeks stained with dry tears, hair mussed and slightly tangled. For as long as he’s known her, he always knew she was able to handle her liquor, could easily drink him under the table, so for her to be passed out drunk, he knows she must’ve consumed more than her usual fair share. The thought alone makes his knees nearly buckle in place, knowing she had to have been in a great deal of pain for it to get that bad.

Shaking himself out of his thoughts, he lifts her limp body again, settling her against him before heading into his bedroom. He navigates his way through the darkened room, depositing her on his unmade bed. She curls into his silk sheets on reflex, a low sigh leaving her lips. Careful not to disturb her, he removes her heels as carefully as possible, pulling up the sheet that had accumulated at the foot of his bed over her slim form.

He moves a strand of hair that had fallen on her face, locking it gently behind her ear in a slow caress.

“Why don’t you love me?” He nearly jumps out of his skin when she speaks suddenly, voice low and slurred, eyes still closed shut. “Why don’t you love me the way I love you?” Her last words are a mumble and he doesn’t know how he didn’t miss them.

Harvey finds himself frozen in place for what felt like the hundredth time that night, unable to gather oxygen into his lungs. He swallows back another giant lump that formed in the back of throat, taking a trembling hand to caress he cheek, absentmindedly wiping away her dried tears. “You have no idea, how much I do love you.” He whispers the words into the still of the night, watching as her body remains immobile and her breathing fully deepens, signaling that she finally succumbed to sleep.

Sighing, he hesitates for a split second before he places a lingering kiss on her cheek, tears immediately springing in his own eyes.

He steps back to watch her for a moment, taking in her slim form curled under his covers. He hates how fragile she looks, how upset and exhausted she appears. But more than anything, he hates that he’s the one who caused it.

Turning around with one last sigh, he exists his bedroom and heads to the living room, debating whether or not to pour himself a glass of something hard and numbing. He foregoes that decision to sit on the couch instead, knowing only one of them should be sober and attentive that night. Settling deeper into the furniture, he slips off his shoes and waits for sleep to come.

It never does.

The first thing Donna notices- feels- is the pounding in her head, something akin to a sledgehammer. She winces against the light that meets her suddenly through her still closed eyes, and curls deeper into the bed. She frowns when the soft cotton she expects to feel is softer under her hands. Silk. Her frown deepens when she tries to take a deep breath. This doesn’t smell like my room, this smells like- her eyes shoot open then, cringing when the sun’s rays protrude through the floor to ceiling windows and meets her.

She takes a moment to let the dizziness pass her as much as possible, allowing her eyes to adjust to the annoyingly bright room. It takes her less than a second for the realization to hit her in full, nausea bubbling into her at the same time. Hand covering her mouth, she rushes into his ensuite, falling to the cold tilled-floor before emptying the contents of her stomach into the toilet at her feet.

Donna barely notices his presence then, voice dulled by her own wretching. She feels his hands gathering up her hair, pulling it back while he continues talking to her, trying to soothe her as best as he could.

When she feels like there’s nothing else to throw up, her stomach cramping in pain and throat burning, she settles back against his glass-enclosed shower, eyes closed and breathing heavy. She faintly hears the faucet in the background, his feet shuffling before settling near her again.

“Donna?” His voice makes her forehead knit in pain, the throbbing from her headache returning ten-fold, “Donna, how are you feeling?” She feels a cold cloth meet her skin then, gently wiping the area around her lips before he’s standing up again. He comes back with what feels like another wet cloth, this time it meets her forehead and and temple, “Hey, you in there?” He asks again.

She manages a low hum in response, her body feeling numb and clammy. She can’t remember the last time she felt like this, hungover and then some. A sudden memory of her late college years flashes before her, making her cringe again, the sensation of falling ill washing over her in waves.

“Are you going to be sick again?” Harvey asks her, touching her arm gently.

Donna only shakes her head, “‘m fine.” She mumbles, eyes finally opening to meet his.

He’s staring at her in a way she’s certain he can see right through her. His forehead is creased, brown eyes darker than usual as they bore into her own. “Do you need anything?” He asks her softly.

She shakes her head, “No, I-” Suddenly reality dawns on her, flashes from the night before falling in short and fast increments, worsening her headache.

“Shit.” She curses, standing up in a flash. The sudden move makes her vision swim, and he’s on her in a split second, hands shocking her when they touch her skin.

“Whoa, hey, slow down.” Harvey starts, making sure he has a good hold on her lest she stumble in place.

He tries to ignore the stabbing he feels when she shakes him off, moving swiftly past him. He’s more than a little surprised by her movements that it takes him a couple of seconds to move his own feet and follow her out.

“Donna, wait.” He yells after her, jogging the short distance to his living room.

He finds her looking around in confusion, eyes furrowed as she swivels her head around the room. “Where are my shoes?”

“Donna, can we talk-”

“Where are my shoes?” She all but barks out.

Harvey sighs, “They’re in my room, but-” He curses under his breath when she moves past him again, walking into his bedroom to gather her heels.

“Donna, we need to-”

“No we don’t.” She tells him in a voice too steady for seven in the morning with a hangover looming over her.

“The hell we don’t!” Her head shoots up at him at his raised voice, eyes wide when she sees his chest heaving.

“Harvey, don’t.” She seethes, voice dangerously low.

“Donna,” he begins quieter this time, “last night-”

“I was drunk, Harvey. I made a stupid decision, and wound up here, that’s it.” She bites out, eyes starting to gloss over with tears.

“So, you remember what happened?” He asks her calmly.

“And I’d much rather forget it ever did, so if you’ll just let me-” She moves to cross his path again, but he blocks her, anticipating her move this time around.

Donna closes her eyes, taking in a breath before she speaks, “Harvey, move.”

“No.” He stubbornly states.

“Why the hell not?”

“Because we need to talk!”

“Don’t you mean yell? Because that’s all you’ve been able to do the last week, so excuse me if I’m not in the mood to hear about how I screwed up your relationship-”

“Donna,”

“-and how I’m to blame for every damn thing in your life-“

“Donna-”

“-and how it’s all my goddamn fault that things got so messed up between us-” 

“It’s not!”

His words are like ice water on her, hazel eyes widening in the process. If she didn’t already have a killer headache, one would’ve started to form in that moment.

“Harvey-“

“It’s all my own goddamn fault, okay? I screwed us up. Not you.” His eyes are like saucers as he stares at her, shock-faced and flushed with too many days without proper sleep. The last time she remembers him looking this distressed, Mike was going to prison and he was in her apartment throwing blame at himself for getting all of them in that situation.

“I never should’ve blamed you,” he continues, breathing through his words that bubble up in him in a way that makes it hard to properly breathe, “I- I fucked up, okay?”

There had been very few moments in her life where words failed her, and she was able to count them all in one hand. She quickly realizes she had to add this moment to her list.

“Things got- so messed up,” he shakes his head, staring into her shocked expression, “You showing up last night- it shouldn’t have come to that, I shouldn’t have needed to see you like that for me to realize what a goddamn idiot I’ve been. I treated my best friend like shit and I don’t think I could ever forgive myself for that.”

When she sees the tears in his eyes begin to fall, she closes her own as tightly as she could, trying to keep herself from breaking down in that moment. Before she opens them again, she hears his feet shuffling closer to her.

He’s a blurred image when her eyes meet his again. Blinking past the tears, she feels his hand tentatively reaching up to wipe them away.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbles, “I am so so sorry, Donna.”

She can only nod in response, not trusting herself to speak.

“I don’t expect you to forgive me, I don’t expect us to be-” he swallows past a sob that accumulates in him, “to be anything more than- what we are now or to go back to the way we were, but I just need you to know,” he moves closer to her now, hands finding a place on her arms, holding her gaze to him, “I love you.”

Donna mentally curses the way her eyes well up more in that moment, the way her lips tremble merely at his words.

“Harvey, please-” she whispers, words shaky and broken.

“Just- hear me out, okay?” He waits for her to nod, before he continues, “I love you, completely.”

Her tears are free falling now, the saltiness meeting her lips in increments.

“I was too damn blind and scared to lose you, that I failed to realize that I already had. When you kissed me- I didn’t want to feel what I felt, because I was with someone else, and I kissed you back because I enjoyed it. I wanted more. I wanted everything with you, but I couldn’t because I was in a committed relationship and I vowed that I’d never be that person-”

“To cheat.” Donna finishes for him quietly, sniffling back.

Harvey shakes his head. “Truth is, I was cheating on you by being with her,” when she gives him a confused look he quickly explains, “You came to me, months ago, asking for more. I was confused and scared, I didn’t know whether that ‘more’ included me, and before I could grow a pair and ask you about it I-” she nods in understanding before he could finish his thought, “-and I tried to tell myself that it was right, she was right, but she wasn’t, none of it was. You were all I wanted, but I went to her because that was easier than facing the truth, than taking a risk with you because if I ever lost you…” he shakes his head again, the words trapped in his throat, “I took the feelings I had for you and transferred them onto her.” He finishes quietly, face full of shame.

“I don’t deserve you, Donna,” he repeats the words he told her last night, feeling the need to re-emphasize them, “You deserve someone who’s not blind to what he has right in front of him, who doesn’t blame you for their own shit, and who doesn’t take thirteen goddamn years to tell his best that he’s in love with her.” He waits to gauge her reaction, watching as she studies his every feature.

Finally, she takes a breath, giving him her best composed expression with fresh tears still on her cheeks. “You’re right,” she states simply, making his brow furrow in confusion, “you did wait too damn long,” she sees his face fall for a split second before she grabs hold of his now wrinkled dress shirt that he slept in, ironing out the creases in it, “You’re wrong about one thing, though,” she meets his eyes again, “you do deserve me.”

His lips thin then, a futile attempt to keep some of his emotions at bay. “I’m not so sure about that.” he tells her quietly.

“Listen, Specter, you are a goddamn idiot, and you did screw things up, a lot, and it’s going to take me possibly a hell of a long time before I can trust you won’t freak out on me, or us, but,” her face softens before she continues, “if you really mean what you said-”

“I do.” He tells her with all the confidence he could muster, moving his hands to her lower back, holding her closer against him.

Donna sighs, “Then- there may be hope for you yet, and you can realize you do deserve me. Because I sure as hell deserve to be with someone who loves me and makes me happier than anyone else could, and so help me God, but that person just so happens to be you.” She finishes with a raised eyebrow and a look that nearly makes him fall to his knees.

His lips twitch slightly at her words before sobering up again, “I really am sorry, Donna.”

She brings her hand up to his cheek, thumb caressing his skin gently, “I know you are.”

“Doesn’t feel like it’s enough.” He mumbles against her.

Donna hums response, eyes staring at his lips. “Maybe it’s not,” She meets his eyes again, “but it’s enough for now.”

A semi-awkward silence fills the room, each trying to simultaneously bask in the comfort of being this close to the other, trying to come up with the perfect set of words.

“So…” Harvey is the one to speak first, eyes darting between her own.

“So…” She echoes, head tilting to the side slightly, a twinkle in her eyes.

“Are you feeling any better?” He finally decides to go for a middle ground, plus he really was worried about her.

Realization dawns on her then and she scrunches up her face in disgust, head falling onto his chest with a groan. “I can’t believe I showed up drunk at your door last night.”

Harvey chuckles despite himself, hands rubbing soothing circles on her back. “That makes two of us.” He tells her softly.

Her head lifts from his chest then, weary eyes meeting his, “It wasn’t one of my finest moments.” She mumbles, a sudden shyness appearing on her face.

“Hey, you had every right to be upset with me.” He tells her gently.

“I know that, I just wish I didn’t have to spew all of my emotions with alcohol on my breath and an inevitable hangover to boot.” She rolls her eyes at herself, wincing when it only makes her headache throb even more.

“I hated seeing you that upset,” he whispers, guilt written all over his demeanor, “I never wanted- I just wasn’t thinking-”

“No, you really weren’t.” She agrees softly.

“I don’t know where we go from here.” His voice is all worry and fear, just low enough for her to hear in the short distance between them.

“We- take it one day at a time,” she shrugs with a shadow of a smile on her face.

“Do you think we could- I mean, I’m not expecting us to be- you know, right away, or maybe ever if you don’t think we can-”

“Harvey?”

“Hmm?”

“Can you quit the word vomit and just spit it out already?” She tells him with a half amused and half frustrated tilt to her voice.

He lets out a sigh, trying to gather his thoughts before he could speak again. “I want to be with you. I want us to be- an us.” His eyes search her face for a reaction, for any kind of answer he may find beneath dark hazel eyes.

She purses her lips, “You do, do you?”

Harvey nods, “I do.”

Donna debates making the situation harder on him, knowing how much he had screwed up, had hurt her in the past week. But in her heart of hearts, she knows he is sorry, knows that it took a hell of a lot of courage for him to confess what he did that morning. At this point, she’s too damn exhausted to fight through this anymore with him. And dammit, if he wanted to be with her when she wanted to be with him too- after a week’s worth of doubtful thoughts- she wasn’t going to torture herself as well.

“Well then, I think for the first time in a long ass time we may be on the same page, mister.” She mutters, nails slightly raking through his hair at the nape of his neck.

His eyebrows shoot up in surprise and she refrains from laughing at his reaction. “You’re- sure?”

“I’m sure that I love you,” her words melt him then, and she feels oddly pleased at the way she can affect him so damn much, “and I’m sure that I want to give this a try.”

His forehead meets her as a sigh escapes his lips, “I love you, in case I hadn’t already told you that.”

She softly chuckles, continuing her caress against him, “You did.”

His head lifts, eyes landing on her own to see them crinkling in the corners. He feels like he could die happily in that moment for making her smile for the first time in a too long of a time. He brings his hand up to her cheek, watching as her eyes drift softly in time with his caress, leaning into her slowly….

“Whoa, hold up.” He frowns when her hand meets his chest, eyes narrowed when he finds her giving him a scowl.

“What’s wrong?” He questions in concern.

“You are not kissing me right now.” Donna tells him firmly.

She almost laughs at the way he pouts, “Why the hell not?”

“I literally just threw up in your bathroom not a full five minutes ago, Harvey.” She scolds him.

His face lights up again, a slight humor in his features. “You can borrow one of my toothbrushes.”

She lifts a perfectly arched eyebrow at him.

“No, it’s new,” he quickly clarifies, “I just have about a couple dozen new toothbrushes.”

“For what? To have have them at the ready for your next conquest?” She quips at him.

Okay, he deserved that. Harvey sighs, “No, you’re the one who told me that I should change my toothbrush every three months the last time I had a cavity and complained-”

“Whined.” She corrects with a smirk.

“Okay, fine, whined, when I was in pain, so…”

“Well that’s- sweet, I think.” She muses.

“Really?”

“No, it’s weird.” She quirks at him.

He tilts his head at her tease, a smile widening when they ease back into that familiar rhythm of them. “Why don’t you go and make yourself at home, change if you want to get more comfortable, and I’ll go and make you a bonafide Harvey Specter hangover breakfast?” He softly suggests.

Donna bites her lip, eyes light as she stares at her- boyfriend? Yeah, that’s going to take a while to get used to.

A witty response is on the tip of her tongue when she notices the genuine look on his face- a mixture of pure unadulterated love and concern dripping in them.

“Okay.” She says instead, her smile widening when his face lights up.

“So, you’ll stay?”

She nods, her stomach fluttering at the hope and disbelief in his words, “Yeah, I’ll stay.”

His face can only soften then, bringing his lips down to plant a kiss on her forehead.

“I’m just going to-” he points in the direction of the kitchen, backing away from her slowly, a shy boyish grin on his lips.

Donna only nods in response, watching him disappearing into the living area in amusement, shaking her head before heading to the bathroom to bring some semblance of normality back in her morning. That is, if showering and brushing her teeth, and changing into his clothes is the new norm….

When she returns to the living room half an hour later- his shirt and sweatpants draped over her, body wash scent etched into her skin- she sees him flipping pancakes and scrambling some eggs.

And while the familiar aroma of coffee brewing is calling her name, one good look at the way his whole face lights up when he sees her, and she’s all but rushing to him, pulling his lips down to hers in a bruising kiss, the temptation of having him dulling the rest of her desires.

You make me so happy it turns back to sad,There’s nothing I hate more than what I can’t have,You are so gorgeous it makes me so mad

#darvey #darvey fic #donna x harvey #author: ali #prompt #one shot #rated t #and thank you! xo

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