“Hey, I need to get married for bullshit Infinite Realms reasons, you two in?”
“Tt, of course.”
“Sure thing! Do we need to get going for that like, right now? Or later?”
“Eh, like in a couple of hours? The Observants are demanding some Royal Ball or something and they pulled out some stupid old laws out of their collective asses that if I’m not married by the time it starts they can assign me spouses of their choosing, can you fucking believe that shit?”
“Woah, what the hell? Can they even do that?”
“I was under the impression they were only permitted to observe.”
“Right? It’s total crap, but apparently there’s like this super old law on the books and they didn’t bring it up until now when there’s like no time left to try and force me to marry someone they pick.”
“They are training to gain influence over you?”
“Eh, more like they’re trying to get control of my Dad by way of me. But still fucked as hell.”
“So why do you need to marry both of us? Or do you just need to marry one of us and we should play rock paper scissor for it?”
“Technically I only need to marry one of you, but I don’t want them pulling out any loopholes or something. So, it’d be great if one of you could be my consort for my role as Queen of Mirrors, and one could be my consort for my role as Crown Princess. You two can figure who’s who on that all that, I’m good with whatever.”
“Oooh, can I be consort for the Mirror Court? I can annoy Kon more that way.”
“I am amenable to that. Grandfather will have a fit when he learns that I can cut his access to the Pits off at my discretion and there’s nothing he can do about it.”
“Awesome, okay are you two good for meeting up at like, three? We can pop over to my Lair and get everything sorted out there.”
“Works for me, my only class til this afternoon is at one and the professor already said we’re cutting out early because she has to go out of town this weekend.”
“Four would be more agreeable if possible, I have to take Titus to the vet for his checkup.”
“Okay let’s aim for four then. It’s just signing some paperwork, making some quick blood-slash-ectoplasm pacts and swearing a couple binding oaths… Should only take like five or ten minutes?”
“They’re not gonna make you have a huge royal wedding or anything?”
“Nah. Dad keeps things pretty chill so as long as the paperwork is all in order we’ll be good. Though once Auntie Dorathea finds out she’s absolutely gonna make us have one. She loves planning weddings. Swear its what she makes her hoard out of somehow.”
“So long as we have a say in some of the proceedings I have no issue with that eventuality.”
“Same, it sounds like it’d be a fun way to annoy the Observants even more.”
“Don’t for get all the weirdos trying to be my suitors and all that bullshit.”
“We have an accord then. We can reconvene at the usual place.”
“Awesome, you two are the best! I gotta jet and let everyone know and get the ball rolling on the paperwork stuff. See you guys at four!”
With that, Nomad - Stella Phantom, Crown Princess of the Infinite Realms, Queen of Mirrors, Core of the Speedforce and ghostly hero of the Titans and the Justice League - tore a rip in the fabric of space and time and darted out of the room the same way she came. Through the mind-bending tear in reality the eerie, eye-searing green of the Infinite Realms glowed in all its unsettling glory, Phantom Keep a glittering expanse of night sky made solid in the distance.
Jon waved at her cheerfully as Damian gave a nod of farewell before both silently turned their attention back to their respective tablets as the portal closed behind their friend and teammate and the glimpse of the Ghost Zone disappeared again. Completely unbothered by the conversation just held or the life changing implications that came with them.
Jon was humming as he tapped away at something on the screen before him, Damian propping his head up on his fist in vague boredom as he frowned down at the information he was reading.
The rest of the room Nomad had left behind was caught in a frozen, stunned silence in the wake of the baffling conversation they’d all just been witness to. All eyes in the room darted between Flamebird and Pheonix seated calmly at the end of the table, then to the space where Nomad had disappeared to, back to the young men, and then towards the head of the table where Superman and Batman sat looking bewildered and a bit on the verge of heart attacks.
The short status update meeting was about to become much, much longer it seemed.
Though a lot more entertaining.
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Hey adults: Why do you like being an adult? What do you like about your life?
A couple weeks ago I told the kids at my work that "Being an adult is pretty nice, actually," and they looked shocked, laughed incredulously, and told me I was the first person they'd ever heard say that
So clearly we adults need to talk about this way more often
The past few years have been hard for a lot of people, me included. Covid sucked. I lost three relatives and three pets in one year. Right after lockdown ended, I got badly injured, and ended up housebound for six months and (much more) disabled for two years, and that sucked too.
And you know what? Literally all of that was easier and better than being a teenager.
I like being an adult. I like my life. Even when it's hard, it's mine, and I am building to the best of my ability the a life that I want to live.
I talked about a lot of why being an adult is something worth looking forward to in my last post, so right now I'll simply say this:
I love actually knowing who I am now. I love that I learned and am learning what I want and need. I love that I have independence and autonomy and don't get treated like a kid. I love the fact that I'm the one who gets to decide want I want to do and what I need.
I also love that I'm learning to sew. I love that I've had pet rats, and next will have a pet cat. I love that I got top surgery. I love the way I've decorated my room. I love traveling to visit and crash and even just hang out and do work with my friends, when I can.
I love that I started reading good news every day, and that I actually have hope for the future, and that I started this blog and have been able to help give so many other people hope, too.
So, here's a call to action for my fellow adults: comment or reply or tag what you like about being an adult. What you love about your life.
Let's give some kids some reasons for hope.
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Genuinely, I just cannot comprehend anyone saying that Laerryn vs Essek in a duel would be an even fight.
Laerryn is a con wizard with the Tough feat, mechanically, just to START. She will kill a sitting politician at a moment's notice without worry. She's maybe the most overfunded wizard in history. Essek is a dex wizard who almost got taken out by a pair of magic sleep handcuffs. He defaults to utility caster. And, while both of them will become unhinged if the person they love is threatened in anyway, Laerryn will straight up take down the world in the process and Essek is just as likely to physically drag Caleb out of the fight instead of retaliating.
I'm sorry, but there is literally no contest here. Essek would be a very pretty stain on the ground in seconds. God forbid women do anything.
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Thinking about how Moist's scams and cons are rooted in a cynical belief that those bastards would try to trick me if they could as well. That's his justification for his actions, other than just because he finds it thrilling. And he sees what he does as ultimately harmless - he doesn't kill or maim, slips in and out of lives without a trace - so he doesn't recognize that his actions have meaning until Mr Pump hits him with 2.338 statistical deaths, and doesn't accept it until he finds out Adora Belle was hurt by his scam.
He's wounded so many people. Sure there are the people he believes everyone to be, the ones he relies upon for his scams to work, who try to take advantage of him and are cheated in turn. But there are also desperate people, people who weren't directly involved like Adora Belle, maybe even people who against all odds still tried to be kind to a stranger and were punished for it. And he just isn't capable of realizing that maybe people are real for longer than he sees them for, that they have lives to live and worldviews that can be shredded with too many hurts. He can't accept that people are capable of more than cynical pragmatism, of don't hurt others because they might hurt me.
But all throughout Going Postal, that idea of his is disproven again and again. There's Stanley and Mr Groat, who eke out a little coexistence despite being forgotten, and the elderly postmasters who join him just because they loved their job; there's Adora Belle Dearheart, who was wounded and cheated in life from so many sides and still used that resentment to help marginalized people. Although his own perspective focuses more on who he is rather than a new understanding of who he was, and he rarely reflects on just how much his worldview changes from beginning to end (except when confronted by Adora Belle), he still goes from doing selfish things for selfish reasons to doing things that benefit everyone, especially those he cares about, for selfish reasons. He can still enjoy the exhilarating game of creating new personas and pushing his luck while believing a bit more that humans can be genuinely earnest people as well. And as he approaches that truth, he becomes invested in his life as well, because now he has to stick with it.
Going Postal's about redemption in many ways - the idea that atonement doesn't lie in fixing every mistake you've made, but in moving on and trying to prevent making them again, in recognizing your own crimes being done by others and working against them.
Isn't that at least a little hopeful? That, ultimately, the world isn't so cynical and bitter as you've based your entire life on? That it isn't so difficult to exist after all? It's a lot to take in, but so is any paradigm shift.
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