#but I didn't like that. maybe I'll go back and write that version someday.
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Living together in a big house with one (main) (shared) bathroom means that mornings can be tough.
When you first arrived at the House of Lamentation, it was hard to fit in. It was really hard to get into the bathroom in the mornings and fight six demons for use of the sink. If more than two others were in there at the same time, they practically formed a living wall that blocked you out, forcing you to wake up extremely early or risk being late for school.
That got better over time though. You gradually managed to fit into the house's morning routine.
---
Lucifer has his morning routine down to an exact science. Usually he's fully dressed and has his hair brushed before leaving the bedroom. He might be running on pure muscle memory though - one time you handed him a warm washcloth for his face and he just stared at it in confusion for several seconds with a furrowed brow. He has no problems getting it himself, but this break in routine gave him pause. It took Lucifer a moment to realize what it was and to thank you.
If you get the chance to eat breakfast together, Lucifer likes to ask about your day. "What do you have planned? Remember, we have that meeting at five. Did you prepare for the ancient hex exam?" He might slide a bit of his food onto your plate before he goes, a way of returning the pleasant energy boost you always provide for him.
---
Mammon can hustle. Which means that Mammon can get up early if it benefits him in some way. A part time job, an early bird discount, a chance to slip past Lucifer's defenses and borrow some cash.
That doesn't mean it's easy. Waking up takes some serious effort. Mammon will stumble into the bathroom to do his business first thing in the morning, yawning with his eyes half closed and tugging up whatever pants he just tossed on for modesty.
The tsundere part of his brain takes a few minutes to kick in if he's just woken up. If he spots you, Mammon will demand a good morning hug and wrap his arms around you, deaf to your cries of "Mammon! Go wash your hands before you touch me!"
---
Leviathan is always groaning in the morning. He's probably not aware of it. He's probably muttering complaints but is too tired to actually speak the words properly. His blankets are always a tangled mess, wrapped unevenly around his feet and contorted around his body, but Leviathan can easily Houdini his way out of them when it's time to get up. If there's no event or livestream to wake up early for, he'll sleep in for as long as he can before starting the day with a nice shower.
He finds warm running water to feel so pleasant and you can often find Leviathan spacing out next to the faucet. He'll greet you with a sleepy "ah, morning," and accidentally splash you in an attempt to wave his hand. The embarrassment and slight panic from getting you a towel to dry off with is usually enough to properly wake him up, and he sheepishly exits the bathroom and guards the door until you've finished changing into dry clothes.
---
Satan can hardly even put his shirt on properly when fully awake.
The man's a sleepy mess when he tries to get dressed in the morning. He'll stay up all night to finish a book he's invested in, then stumble out of his room "ready to go" when it's time for breakfast. His pants are unzipped and the button is coming undone. He's only got one sleeve on and it's on the wrong arm, or the buttons on his shirt are all misaligned and half have been skipped over.
He doesn't protest anymore when you tidy him up. Some mornings he'll doze off while you straighten his tie and fall forward into you, then try to play it off as a hug. Satan doesn't want to let go though, you feel so much warmer on a chilly morning.
---
Asmodeus is a rare morning riser. Too much sleep is bad for the skin, he claims. If he has trouble getting up, he'll either go soak in his private tub for energy or seek you out.
"You have to hear what happened last night," he'll say, strolling into your room while there's still ten minutes left on your alarm. He sits on the edge of your bed, and if you try falling back asleep he pulls you up into a sitting position. "Listen to this, you won't believe it!"
Asmodeus isn't afraid to get touchy if it means you'll wake up faster and he gets your attention. He'll sit you in his lap, or press you against his side, or run his hands down your face and squish your cheeks with a mischievous smile.
When the main bathroom is too crowded to use you're free to borrow his, with the caveat he gets to style you for the day and you might be late when he gets overzealous.
---
Beelzebub can also be found awake in the mornings. The quiet hours before everyone else wakes up are best for stretching, taking jogs, and grabbing a pre-breakfast appetizer. He'll get spooked if he hears footsteps approach the kitchen and slam the fridge door shut in a hurry, but all is well when he sees you enter the room instead of Lucifer.
Beelzebub is a big guy who takes up a lot of space. When you run into each other in the bathroom and are rushing to get ready, it's easy to bump into him. On days he's still pretty tired, he might not even notice you bonk your head against his arm. That's fine though - you don't want him to notice you until he's brushed his teeth. After all, Beelzebub's morning breath is a potent magical weapon.
If you need the bathroom sink while he occupies it, Beelzebub is kind enough to nudge you in front of him (once you've confirmed his mouth is minty fresh). You both get to use the mirror this way, and you can both see each other's smiling faces.
---
Belphegor is the king of oversleeping. The powers of you and his twin combined are hardly enough on some days, but mostly the responsibility of waking him falls to you. You quickly learned it's best to wake him from behind his head, if you can manage to maneuver your way into a suitable spot to do so. Anywhere his limbs can easily grab you will result in being pulled into bed. He's like a sleeping kraken.
You suspect that Belphegor wakes up easier than he lets on, but he feigns ignorance. He insists he was totally fast asleep when you struggled to physically drag him down the hallway towards the bathroom, wrapping your arms tightly around his torso with all your strength. And when he clung on to your waist and nuzzled his head into your stomach. And when Beel came to help free you from Belphegor's clutches, but he rolled you under him and muttered "mine now."
Definitely fast asleep, doesn't remember a single thing.
#this kind of went everywhere. it was originally totally different (more in the early relationship stages and getting used to you)#but I didn't like that. maybe I'll go back and write that version someday.#just imagining in nightbringer tho. “you've been our attendant half a week. how do you know our sleeping habits so well? ??”#I used to live in a dorm- in Japan and I kind of imagine the HoL to be similar? ~15 rooms but one bathroom with two toilets and three sinks#obey me!#obey me#obey me scenarios#obey me headcanon#omswd#obey me x mc#obey me leviathan#obey me mammon#obey me shall we date#obey me beelzebub#obey me lucifer#obey me x reader#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me belphegor#obey me fanfic#obey me hcs
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You said last month that it's not Ekko if he's not involved in activism, anarchism, just actively doing shit to make a change. I absolutely agree. But you also said you "come out of a particular background and that means [you] have certain thoughts and approaches to social change that leave out things that others do and are involved in". Would you please elaborate further on that? Not just for writing Ekko, but for the sake of knowing and maybe applying to real life. You made me curious.
So I sat on this for a while not because I didn't want to answer it but because I wanted to answer it thoughtfully, and I've typed out some things that didn't feel right, but I'm going to try again now.
I tried to find the exact context for where I said that and I failed lol so I am working off memory, but again I will try.
So in terms of background, I'm a Black American. When I was young, I pretty much assumed that my family history would be depressing and I didn't want to look into it. And some of that is there: family trees that get lost once you hit enslavement, dysfunction you can pretty much trace right back to that period, having to explain to people that your family is on the light side not because of consensual relationships but because you're from one of those states that exported slaves, you get the deal. A byproduct of this is that by the time I was an adult and wanted to dig into it and found that there was actually a lot to learn, many of the elders I wanted to learn from had passed on.
That, mixed in with me trying to understand my... financially turbulent?? life led me to engage with black radical thinkers as an adult. And that led into left-wing politics in general. So that's like half of it.
The other half is I've always been the type of person who likes a hands-on problem. My approach to social change has always just been "find a problem and throw myself at it." And that translated into a social service background. Even now, to pay for my classes, I work in social services at my university, still throwing myself at a problem that's sort of followed me around for a decade or so now. I'm not in love with the conditions of trying to fight a problem within the walls of an institution that helps perpetuate them, but for me, the immediacy of people's needs supersedes any need I feel for ideological consistency.
On top of that, I study race. And media. So imagine my excitement when I see Ekko!
I don't know that I've ever encountered a character who checked so many boxes. He sees problems and throws himself at them. He practices radical compassion with people struggling with substance use. AND their victims. And even though he's fighting Silco, he knows that the problems in the city go straight to the top (I oughta write a fic someday where he does make it across the bridge and gets to yell at the council because he so deserves that).
He grieves. I've said before that grief is the emotion that has most defined my adult life. I feel like I'm always grieving. And Ekko models how you do that and keep moving. Rather than giving into the hopelessness of the setting, he creates a place where people can heal and be their best selves. AND HE HAS NATURAL HAIR!!! My natural hair journey is another story but it's honestly tied up in all of this lol.
He's like a treasure trove of things that matter to me, honestly. I'm not even sure how much I realized it at first. But as time passed, I'd keep going back to this character and thinking. His revolutionary spirit is truly to be admired. And I think that evolution in how I've thought about him comes through pretty clearly in my writing, as I come to fully embrace a bottom-up style of conceptualizing revolutionary thought and practice. I know I'll grow and change as I get older, learn more, and do more, but at this particular moment, I think Ekko has a lot of value for me.
So what am I not interested in? Off the top of my head...
versions of the character that leave out that political dimension. I'm not inserting politics into the show. The division between what is political and isn't is a false one. If the politics aren't registering, that's because they're close to the politics of the status quo
which is not to say I think everybody has to write him with politics fully foregrounded, but I wish more people would, you know?
and speaking of the politics, not really interested in ones that aren't radical. Not trying to pass a certain purity test, but we can keep in mind that Misfit Toys shows Scar beating up a dummy Enforcer, in gear. Which they probably got by fighting them. Fun!
another thing I think is key and I would like to see engaged with more is that Ekko doesn't view people using shimmer as enemies. I honestly wonder whether the Firelights know as much as they do about Silco's stuff because they have members who formally worked in the syndicate.
and I bring that up because another thing that the show as a whole and Ekko's interactions with Jinx invite us to think about is not viewing anyone as too far gone. I think in the rush to clearly delineate good and evil, we make too many lines and ignore the material conditions that motivate and contextualize people's actions.
and on that note, I don't like to make Ekko a paragon. I think casting him as a pure soul who is working tirelessly for his people ignores his indignation at the situation around him and how he is actively choosing, every day to do the things he does. I like to keep agency foregrounded.
To close, I wanna share some quotes, because y'all know I love reading revolutionaries.
“It is necessary that the weakness of the powerless is transformed into a force capable of announcing justice. For this to happen, a total denouncement of fatalism is necessary. We are transformative beings and not beings for accommodation.”
—Paulo Freire, Pedagogy of the Oppressed
“We have chosen a different path to achieve better results. We have chosen to establish new techniques. We have chosen to seek forms of organization that are better adapted to our civilization, abruptly and once and for all rejecting all kinds of outside diktats, so that we can create the conditions for a dignity in keeping with our ambitions.
We refuse simple survival. We want to ease the pressures, to free our countryside from medieval stagnation or regression. We want to democratize our society, to open up our minds to a universe of collective responsibility, so that we may be bold enough to invent the future. We want to change the administration and reconstruct it with a different kind of civil servant. We want to get our army involved with the people in productive work and remind it constantly that, without patriotic training, a soldier is only a criminal with power. That is our political programme.”
—Thomas Sankara, Speech before the General Assembly of the United Nations
“Let me just say: Peace to you, if you're willing to fight for it.”
—Fred Hampton
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HSHQTASK059: FAREWELL !
when did you join ? what made you join ? what do you remember from the plotlines that were current at the time ? where were you in life when you joined and where are you now ?
i was in college! april 2018. but i was looking for something new to join. i liked the political aspect of the rp, it was still a pairs rp with the alliance system that seemed fun. i was in the middle of my political science major so i liked the idea of using what i was learning. also the main was very pretty. a lot of it was new to me, that's when we were all using icons and i didn't know what the heck small text was.
which characters have you written over the years ?
oh no, let's see: elyse, aslan, michael, daisuke, roxanna, stella, rebeka (i think was her name??) (stella part 1 kinda), ester (remember the pons?), domas (daisuke part 1 lbr), there was a daniel bruhl fc early on rip to him, ming fa (jianguo part 1), jianguo (my sweet boy, i did you dirty), queen of nambia i don't remember your name but you were fun, duchess of brittany i think?
what is your favourite plotline that you've been part of ?
andorra!
also layslan my beloved.
what about other people's plotlines ?
the russian plots were always super sexy and the zulus were so good. also england. just all of it.
who is your favourite character from the ones you've played ? why ? what made you love them ? what made them so fun to write ?
elyse, my little nightmare. she grew up with me it feels like. i was studying nationalism and populism in my undergrad degree and i wanted to play with those styles of politics. she's so screwed up but i love her. her insecurity and the way that makes her clings to her choices, even when they are clearly bad. i think we all do that sometimes, we fear something and the create the situation that we fear.
honorable mention to my baby michael and my favorite villain domas/daisuke who would just plan fun.
if you could relive a plotline, which would it be ?
i wish i could live in farnauld forever. novel version when?
is there a plotline that you'd edit now if you could ?
probably my early ones, like early prussia. i learned so much in this half decade about writing, storytelling, and working in a group. i am entirely grateful to all of you for teaching me with kindness and love.
what's a plotline you wish you would have been able to finish before closing or just write more of ?
i'm not going to lie, i've had kalyse on my mind recently. but we had a whole thing with michael planned out and northern ireland which would have been fun. and we had some stuff planned for daisuke too that would have been interesting.
also, if we had done it, you would have screamed at the mexico/cuba plot
what is your favourite ooc memory ?
all of them but hshqmas is always a delight. also all the april fools admin announcements which got me every year and now this *weeps*
where can others find you if they want to get in touch ?
i'm on discord as ladyjane and my rph is @abbydoesrph. maybe i'll up a 1x1 someday. idk hmu.
what else would you like to say ?
i'm not going to say everything i want to say because i'm in my feelings. i feel like i grew up in hshq; as a person and as a writer. i've joined and left a lot of groups in this time but i always come back here. come home.
i want to say thank you. and thank you for your patience and communication and still loving me when i know i screwed up. i can only hope i've left you with as many good feelings as you all have left me with.
and thank you in particular to the admins for your care, attention, and dedication to the group. honestly, you're outstanding. i wish i had bosses who would asked for and provided feedback as well you three.
all of my love, and i mean all of it, to hshq. xoxo.
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🎲 🦷🧩
China! Delighted to hear from you, my friend <3 let's see what we've got here...
🎲 ⇢ what stops you from writing more in your free time?
Interesting phrasing on this question! Initially I was going to start with the laundry list of life things that get in the way (chores, work, family stuff, social stuff, other hobbies, etc.) but then I realized it specifically says "in your free time". Going by that more narrow reading...
I was just talking with my therapist the other day about how I don't like doing the same thing repeatedly artistically (much to the detriment of my follower count, since consistent and reliable output is one of the primary ways to build a following), and she pointed out that that's a common thing with perfectionists, because we always want to be outdoing ourselves or doing it better. And wow, if that didn't hit home...so yeah. I think a good chunk of it is that perfectionism, that fear that I'm going to regress, that I'm going to disappoint people, that I'm not spending my time living up to my potential. Which, of course, means I spend a lot of time not writing when I could be.
Maybe someday I'll be able to internalize the "two cakes" theory with regards to my own writing...
🦷 ⇢ share some personal wisdom or a life hack you swear on
Do the thing. Do it now before you forget, or before your fears start sabotaging you, or before your brain decides it'd rather focus on literally anything else. Obviously you're not going to be able to always do everything immediately, but if it's important to you, if you're feeling the motivation to get started—that motivation is PRECIOUS and also evanescent. So jump on that horse and ride it as far as it'll take you.
🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?
Passive characters. If a character isn't doing anything to further the plot themselves, if they're just sitting and letting things happen to them and angsting about it without getting up and DOING something about it...yeah. No thanks.
(technically, this isn't 100% accurate—I once hate-read an entire 10K Swesson fic starring the whiniest, most passive version of Sam just because it was so terribly written that I was having a blast complaining to a friend of mine about it—but 99.9% of the time, yeah, that's gonna have me hitting the back button within a chapter or two.)
play Writer Truth or Dare with me!
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Hiii!!! How are you?
First I want to say that I love everything you write, and that I am a complete SIMP of your story "Cakes for Reaper".
And second, I wanted to know if you would be willing to write an Inspired By Art with this image...
If you don't want to write it thats okay too, I send you a lot of hugs and kisses🥰❤
AAAWWW Thank you so much! I saw your repost! This is so sweet! ❤❤ And I love that pic so much ;^; I'm so glad that IBA is working! 🌹💪
Obs; I GOT 2 VERSIONS (Maybe more?) FOR THAT IBA 😈
IBA - INSPIRED BY ART
VERSION 1
A FRIEND
Summary: Genji is trying to make Hanzo make new friends after got into Overwatch. Both were sitting at the garden of a big house in a mountain that Overwatch stays on the weekends when there's no mission.
Hanzo- I don't need friends, Genji. Let just meditate, please!
Genji- But you neeed!
Hanzo- But I don't want too!
Genji- I don't fucking care if you want or not! You neeeeed!
Hanzo- Friends doesn't help in anything! How many times you came to me as kid complaining about your "friends"?
Genji- Hey! Some of them was nice!
Hanzo- "some" of them?
Genji- Everybody had once a fake friend! The FFF!
Hanzo- ....F...F...F?
Genji- Yeah, is for Fucking Fake Friend.
Hanzo- *sighs* right...friends are headaches.
Genji- Hey! What about...Tracer?
Hanzo- Talk to much.
Genji- Mercy?
Hanzo- Just talk about medicine.
Genji- Wha...? Ok...aaah, Brigitte?
Hanzo- Nice but...wait, why you're only picking the girls?!
Genji- Ok ok! Rein?
Hanzo- Too loud! Energetic!
Genji- If you keep looking only to those things you'll never have one! This is obvious! Cassidy?
Hanzo- Can you just stop?!
You- Guys? *looking at both holding a tray* Are you guys fighting again?
Genji- No! He's just a stubborn!
Hanzo- *frozed after looking at you*
You- *laughs* Of course he's a stubborn, Genji, he's your brother *approaches and put the tray with tea and cake between them* You're the same.
Genji- I'm not stubborn, come on! *silence* just a little.
You- Is a family thing *chuckles sitting together* I bring some cake that I made it...by the way, what are you guys talking about?
Hanzo- Genji want me to have friends...*roll eyes*
You- You don't have?
Genji- He said that "No! I don't want friends! I hate people!" *making a funny impression*
Hanzo- I don't sound like that and I didn't said that I hate people!
You- *chuckles* I'm not your friend, Han?
Hanzo- I...I don't want to sound rude but...I don't know if I should.
Genji- You know what? Deal with him, y/n...*pick up the cake and the tea* I'll eat in peace. *get out of there* What I stubborn dickhead....
You- *looking him go* So....*back to Hanzo* Why are you so afraid?
Hanzo- I'm not afraid...I just don't need that friendship stuff.
You- Well...you're a lonely wolf, aren't you? *smile*
Hanzo- Hm...I guess I am.
You- You know a lonely wolf can't survive for too long, right? He needs to find a family.
Hanzo- *sighs* I survived until now...I like my solitude.
You- I like mine too...*sit close to him looking at the view* But, sometimes I need someone to spend time together, gossiping...make fun, playing games... is cool. Is not with everyone, of course, is only with who makes me comfortable.
Hanzo- ...*look at you* Like me?
You- Yes.
Hanzo- But...why?
You- Because your aura is good and comfortable to stay around.
Hanzo- *chuckles* Sometimes, you sound like Zenyatta.
You- *laughs* Maybe I'm spending too much time with him!
Hanzo- Keep spending...he's a good master. So...I'm...a comfortable zone?
You- For me, yes. You're a good man, Han. I hope someday you have that knowledge of yourself.
Hanzo- Good...*sighs* After all I've done, how could you?
You- Hanzo, this is past...*sighs looking at him* Stays where it belongs, in the past. The memories, traumas, can be worked out.
Hanzo- I was a terrible human being, y/n! I killed people and my bro-! *looked away closing his eyes* I harmed so many innocents...I was in a mafia! My family...my reputation...my honour...
You- Dosen't matter now, Shimada...What matter is what those traumas made you be who you're now! You changed...you fought for so long. You deserve to be loved. *hold his hand making him look at you a little lost in how to react* You. Are. A. Good. Man.
Hanzo- What makes me that man?
You- *smiles* You want me to say it? Well...you love to help and care, you're gently, patient, helpful, a golden heart man. Is a man that, I knew, since the first time I saw you, I knew how broken that man was. You're broken, Han, but doesn't mean that you're villain or good, you're just human. Be broken is being human.
Hanzo- *looking at you listening to every word*
You- The Hanzo Shimada of ten years ago is not the same one now. Everything that happened there, doesn't matter now.
Hanzo- But...I killed my own brother...*you could see his eyes watering for your surprise*
You- It wasn't you...You told me your side of the story and I promise one thing to you, Han, my friend... it wasn't you. They did that, they must die for that! You didn't have a choice.
Hanzo- I...! *look away*
You- *smiles* Hey, you trusted me to tell your story, you darkest secrets...this is friendship, you know?
Hanzo- *look at you again*
You- Why me, Han? You could have told that to anybody.
Hanzo- *silence*...I...trust you. That's all.
You- Are you sure?
Hanzo- ....*cleans throat* You...Is...! Is just you. I like you.
You- *giggles* I like you too, Hanzo, that's why you're my friend! And...trust me, ok? *put the hand on his shoulder* I'll be here even in your darkest times. I'll never disappoint you.
Hanzo- *blush looking at you* Arigatou...*sighs* I didn't knew that you think like that.
You- I only express my feelings and thoughts when needed.
Hanzo- When I...said...that I like you I...I mean it. *blushing harder and hold the cloth of his pants*
You- Oh...! *blush* Wh-what? Really? Wait! You mean...! Lo...ve?
Hanzo- I guess so...?
You- Well, maybe is just a admiration?
Hanzo- Maybe...*looking away*
You- So...when you look at me, what comes in your mind?
Hanzo- *sighs and close his eyes* Hm... I can't tell, is a mix of feelings. I can't pick one.
You- *laughs* It's ok...but I like you too, Hanzo, for real *kiss his cheek* Remember, I'll be here, always *gets up* And eat the cake.
Hanzo- *looking at the view while you go away*... *look at the cake...it was his favorite one, the white strawberry cake* ....!!! *hide his burning blushed face km his hands(pic)* She's so cute...! Why my heart is so stupidly fast?! I want to marry her! Oh my dragons...! I hate her for that....! *sighs and go back to normal* ....*giggling and slap his face* Stop it! Idiot! *silence and look at the cake making him smile again* Well...I guess I finally gain something meaningful in my life...love. *pick up the cake*
I can't wait for the version 2 💪 hope you like it!
#she/her#overwatch#overwatch x reader#fem!reader#overwatch fanfiction#overwatch x you#hanzo shimada#hanzo x you#genji shimada
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Vote for Snow White's song here (closes Sunday 10/15)
Submit suggestions for Aurora or any other Disney heroines
Reasonings for each song option beneath the cut:
Bejeweled from Midnights
Well the music video is a Cinderella story, so obviously Taylor herself sees some connections between this song and the character.
Baby love, I think I've been a little too kind
Didn't notice you walking all over my peace of mind
In the shoes I gave you as a present
Puttin' someone first only works when you're in their top five
And by the way, I'm going out tonight
Best believe I'm still bejeweled
When I walk in the room
I can still make the whole place shimmer
Enchanted from Speak Now (Taylor's Version)
Maybe too obvious, but this entire song tells Cinderella's journey all too well. Starting with the unhappiness of her life at the beginning with her stepmother and stepsisters, then it describes her meeting the prince at the ball and everything changes.
There I was again tonight
Forcing laughter, faking smiles
Same old tired, lonely place
Walls of insincerity, shifting eyes and vacancy
Vanished when I saw your face
All I can say is, it was enchanting to meet you
Mean from Speak Now (Taylor's Version)
This could be a take on Cinderella's relationship with her stepmother and stepsisters. How they constantly put her down and make her question her self worth, but she holds onto the hope that one day she will be able to move on to better things without them.
You, with your words like knives
And swords and weapons that you use against me
You have knocked me off my feet again
Got me feeling like I'm nothing
...
Someday, I'll be livin' in a big, ole city
And all you're ever gonna be is mean
Someday, I'll be big enough so you can't hit me
And all you're ever gonna be is mean
Why you gotta be so mean?
The Very First Night from Red (Taylor's Version)
This could the period between the ball and Cinderella reuniting with the prince. At first, her stepmother doesn't know about her night with the prince, but then there is heartbreak when she finds out and it seems that she will be successful in keeping Cinderella away from the prince. Cinderella wishes she could back to that very first night.
I wish I could fly
I'd pick you up and we'd go back in time
I'd write this in the sky
I miss you like it was the very first night
Take me away, take me away
Take me away to you, to you
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Tagged by @aeide and @brasideios. Thanks, wonderful humans! <3
1) How many works do you have on AO3? Two(ish..)
2) What’s your total AO3 word count? I pulled a few things down for reworking a while back, so currently 15,381.
3) What fandoms do you write for? AO3 says exclusively AC Odyssey, but I also have active docs for BG3, SDV, and AC Valhalla. Someday in the (far) distant future I hope to finish some for KotOR and Dragon Age Awakening as well.
4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos? There's an unclaimed smut piece out there that's lapped everything else, but after that it's Korinth, then Euboea. By Kudos it's Smut > Ship > Gen Fic, which does not surprise me about AO3 at all 😂
5) Do you respond to comments? Try to!
6) What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Considering they're all WIPs, I abstain xD
7) What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Again, abstaining^
8) Do you get hate on fics? None so far.
9) Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes. The excessive detail kind. For some reason it's easier to write than anything else, so someday I'll probably subject you all to that. I apologize in advance lmao
10) Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? Nope! My brain / docs are very much like my blogs (see pinned post for reference). I admire all of you who cross streams, but I am just not built that way.
11) Have you ever had a fic stolen? Nope.
12) Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope.
13) Have you ever co-written a fic before? AGES ago. I admire it, but not my thing.
14) What’s your all time favorite ship? As much as I love the Adrestia... Ebon Hawk, BELOVED. But no seriously... how could a person ever pick a favorite ship? Kara/Lee maybe (platonic or otherwise). Kassidas is up there. Recency bias says my BG3 ship too, but there's an OC in there so no one knows what I'm talking about... I love a lot of ships, okay?!? I love them all, okay???
15) What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I used to be offended by this question, but considering I have *pauses to count...* 27 open one shots for BG3 and only plan to finish 1.... 😅
16) What are your writing strengths? Unwavering intent to finish. It never ebbs.
17) What are your writing weaknesses? The actual finishing part. It never happens lmao.
18) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? In theory I enjoy it. It's almost always a sweet touch imo, but that said, it does break immersion if I need to go hunting for a translation. It's worth it usually? But case by case.
19) First fandom you wrote for? I think I've given a different answer to this question every time it's been presented. Honestly, I don't remember. The first time I posted was a flurry of Dragon Age Origins, Snow White & the Huntsman (ahaha), and Knights of the Old Republic though, prompted by the fact that my laptop was dying and I didn't know google drive existed yet. Pure panic posting. Do not recommend.
20) Favorite fic you’ve written? I'm the sort that never wants to see it again once it's published. I'll always love the version in my head better - what makes it to a page is mostly for love of fandom. Of all the fics living in my head though, it's probably the Kassidas one. It's what brought me to tumblr and returned a whole part of my mind to me that had been missing for a decade. Nothing beats that <3
No pressure tagging @merelyafigment @leofrith @whereforartthoumisthios @reiverreturns @anosrepasi :)
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{ ⊾ } —- favorite rp memory? / { ⋎ } —- favorite thing about the rp community? ( forces you to be nice because its funny ) / { ⊿ } this was talk about your favorite character but amma add spice : talk about your favorite sim character <3
wahhh, i had to leave the mysims rpc after a huge stupid drama blew it up (part of my decision to leave was due to me being busy with school anyway, plus it was just boring to continue in that fandom when half of my rp partners (2 people) suddenly blocked me) but my time in that fandom will always hold a very special place in my heart. it was the first tumblr rpc that i really got into, and it was back in the days of people actually interacting and sending out random asks and tagging their mutuals in random starters. even with only 5 people, a pet rock, and a shoelace in the fandom, the dash felt so vibrant and alive.
i had one ship that i really loved, travis & crystal, wherein i wrote crystal and my friend (at the time) joey wrote travis. they were high school sweethearts, the dumb blond jock boy & the bitchy sassy goth girl riddled with teen angst. and they were sooo cute 💕 i struggle to listen to songs about summer love without going back to them
i do wanna bring my mysims muses back someday, but i'm worried i'll never be able to recapture the magic that was The Thems, i'm sooo :(
* * *
fuck you
my favorite thing about the rpc community is... honestly... just existing as a community. i love seeing everybody's writing and posts on my dash and being able to get inspired by those! while i write entirely for myself (and you should, too!) i find that my writing is better when i'm faced with other writing. there's just something about getting a really good reply from your partner, like when eli hit me with the line "an ouroboros of narcissism" or something like that, that gets me.
you know when you read something so good that your fingers get twitchy and you feel compelled to put them on the keys yourself? i live for that feeling, and it's something i don't get as easily in the fanfiction community. but in the rpc, that feedback loop is pretty much constant
* * *
AGH... how could you make me pick a favorite sim?? :( all of the residents of sunset valley (not you, thornton wolff) have me in a fucking vice. (i'm jk, even thornton gets me, but goddamn he is terrible, but that's what's fun about him. pretty much every time i play with thornton, i make him the biggest bitch imaginable)
but ig... my favorite sim out of all of them is probably mortimer goth. he's definitely gotten the most playtime out of all of the sunset valley townies. i love going against established canon and making him marry the ghost, lolita goth, in his backyard instead of bella bachelor like he's ~supposed~ to or whatever. sb pointed out that that was very twilight-ish, and i'm like. fuck it, idc, maybe twilight has a point. it is kinda freaky, but i think it's cute. weird but cute. let me live, goddamn!!
a very close second is agnes crumplebottom, mortimer's aunt. without player intervention, she will pretty much always die loveless and alone, despite having the "hopeless romantic" trait, and that breaks my heart :( so i intervene as often as i can bc i can't stand to see her die lonely :((
she's a recurring character from... i believe the very first sims game, although she didn't come in until one of the expansion packs. and she made her debut as a crotchety old woman who beat happy lovers who committed pda in front of her with her purse, which ok.......... queen...
but also with sims 3 giving us the backstory that her fiance died right before their HONEYMOON and the implication that she's only bitter about happy couples bc she feels she lost her chance at love... she got me like :(((
(also i just looked it up and i was right. agnes was first introduced in the expansion pack for the sims, "hot date." mortimer has also been in all 4 sims games released so far, in the very base versions of all.)
#misc :: ( ooc )#int :: ( answered )#bornchaos#//it's too late to play cyberpunk tonight so i'm finally answering this really old ask#//to give you a big autistic infodump about the sims
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I love semma so much. I love them so much. I have literally written roughly 60 pages of story for a universe I completely aside from a few things, made up, comprising and spanning over twenty years of time so far.
Impressive mildly, to say the least considering I rediscovered an outline for this from 2000s? I of course fleshed out doctored this storyline there's been quite a few versions of this story but ultimately I kind of have a hope that I have given my thirteen or fourteen year old self justice somehow?
At the very least I'm finding myself a writing machine which makes me feel good. 🙃
here's to the genuine hope that someday soon I will complete backtrack, find a way out of this corner I wrote myself into in together forever (an emjay vehicle and my pandemic baby), and some other long, multichaptered works. I suck at writing endings. ✍️
I always aspire to write a holiday esque story this might be the year it happens to be finished on time. Backtrack believe it or not was slated to be in the earlier chapters but I kind of diverged and I'll fated maybe this Christmas I pretty much scrapped and time got away from me is literally holidayesque. I have one I hadn't posted pretty much and this story ive been working on has always been a holiday type story but it doesn't like my other stories aren't all one ship there are multiple relationships interleaved such as in Backtrack there's Cranny and Janny in a weird triangle that ultimately leads to fall out for one ship and a full on romance for the other relationship which initially was planned to play out much differently than I started with, in this story mentioned above there is an original character and entire life that didn't pan out in canon who now exists in this universe I created circa 2003 and fleshed out and humanesque. By comparison Camille of Backtrack, the Wasaga Beach "girl next door" who is sort of cursed by where she comes from was somewhat based loosely on Theresa from The OC and also if you could believe it Haley James from One Tree Hill.
Camille, affectionately known as Cami or Cam, was Sean's childhood best friend he grew up with in Sean’s trailer park in Wasaga Beach. They were both not from money, she was a smart girl and had potential to be something but circumstances and luck seemed to not be on her side. While other kids in their neighborhood were about parties, drugs, are generally prone to growing up too fast, experimenting deviant behavior and the like they largely flocked together and that stuffc didn't phase them and they were boy and girl but the best of friends, the trope kind of Haley and Lucas or Steve and Robin. No sexual or romantic undertones what so ever. That was them, Sean and Camille, though at thirteen.
Camille knew Sean was going through a lot. Tyler Bishop was a popular guy who would push the other peers around but she never put up with that. Things were going in a bad direction and Sean’s anger was reaching a boiling point.
He blacked out in a rage and we know what happens next.
It's worth noting she initially dated or pursued Tyler, who was Sean's enemy, bully, and later catalyst for his departure from Wasaga, to get him off of Sean's back and she had a slight crush on him but she didn't intend to betray her best friend but tensions with Sean and Tyler only intensified.
When he went to live with Tracker, he unfortunately lost contact with Camille. She grew to love Tyler a little prior to Sean and Tracker’s fight, implied he
Fast forward to when Sean returned to Degrassi, and he and Tyler with Camille's now together in a long term happy relationship, Sean was able to bury the beef with Tyler and be peaceful and worked toward a friendship while they attended Wasaga High together for their junior year. Camille was still gearing up for her future. She still had good grades she had uncertainty about college and lack of funds and since Sean left she became a popular student through her relationship with Tyler and experienced the things they'd sort of thumb their nose at as young kids before things changed.
Sean then of course joined his friends back in Toronto at the start of the next school year and ultimately pursued the military and enlisted and all that. Fast forward to 2013 he briefly returns to his trailer park community. Camille is around, she wasn't successful post college and returned home after she graduated and is living with Tyler in this off and on revolving door relationship. She was in home Healthcare and taking care of Sean’s sickly father and her own older parents we don't really know them. The old friends catch up one night over beers and in their loneliness and drunken state have a brief hook up and one night stand resulting in a pregnancy and around the time Tyler and Camille reconcile. Days later Sean returns to Toronto and pursues a life there and also Emma who Camille knew all about her and was supportive of him. Their hook up wasn't something that ruined their friendship and was buried because she didn't know she was pregnant until months later. When she finally discovered it she assumed it was Tyler's because they were in a relationship around two days after Sean’s and they had make up sex. It's also worth noting Tyler is an alcoholic but he is a hardworking guy and loves Camille. He can't wait to be a father but she's looking for a way out because of his temper. They've had violent arguments before it's implied much like Theresa and Eddie in Chino and the animosity between Sean and Tyler in the past is the only real reason for their arrangement and she felts guilty, couoled with arguments and she can't justify staying together but ahe doesn't know how to be alone anymore. He's a very possessive boyfriend and she'd be arguably more successful and got away like Sean did if Tyler didn't root her in Wasaga and financial aspects and other influences too keep her complcant compliant and generally beat down so nothing changed really.
Tyler's alcoholism intensified with the financial stress of working more to provide for the incoming baby. It became more evident that there was a possibility that he might not be the father of the baby. Sean and Emma, since we're in a committed relationship, and paid his mom and dad a visit in a later chapter. Emma heard a doorbell ring and opened the door to find Camille in the early morning to take Sean's father's daily vitals and such visably pregnant. They shared a pleasant conversation while Sean slept unaware.
Emma had never heard of Camille or his life in Wasaga like it was some dirty little secret and she had limited information aside from how he wound up in Toronto but not the key players in the rest of it in the meantime. In Sean's past, she was key and instrumental. It needless to say hurt her feelings.
By now, all four are adults. The pregnancy on Camille is unplanned, but timing was on their side. Prior to this, Emma had been previously married to Spinner. They never had children and were currently divorced for over a year, and Sean and Emma reunited in December and quickly became romantic by Christmastime. Also, Tyler wants to be committed with Camille stable but his alcoholism and implied temper cause tensions and barriers and the fight to end all fights puts her in fight or flight mode and she ran away when he passed out.
somewhere along the lines prior to this all, Emma finds out she can't have a family of her own. She is essentially sterile Camille agreed to a surrogate situation upon finding out the news, and her circumstances being what they are it made the most logical sense. By now she sheltered by a battered women's drug and mental health center in Toronto since the violent fight with Tyler, she later meets Alex Nuñes there who is in recovery (drug addiction) become close as roommates. Sean and Emma catch wind through Alex of this situation, and Camille gets discharged, and she moves in with Sean and Emma.
#idek what i was doing#in my drafts#eh enjoy#wriitng#writing tag#ref#relevent to writing#semma#degrassi#prose#i was born to make queue happy
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finished Frontiers about an hour ago, have some disorganized thoughts
Massive spoilers under the cut
General/gameplay stuff:
-I played the PC version. My laptop's a bit of a potato so I had to crank the graphics settings way down and still had a lot of chugging going on (and it broke a couple of the cutscenes)
-But despite having to fight hardware limitations the whole time, I enjoyed it! There's some jank (and I don't think it's just a result of hardware limitations since I've heard other people struggling with it), but on the whole, the open world was a blast to play through even with the chugging. And Cyberspace wasn't too bad actually, though I might be looking upon it more favorably since it didn't have framerate drops on my device like the open world did; if the open world wasn't having such severe framerate drops for me it probably would've blown Cyberspace out of the water. (I'll have to play this game again on better hardware sometime.)
-IKARUGA IN A SONIC GAME
-BOTTOM TEXT
-Chaos Island had some major issues gameplay-wise but I'm willing to forgive it for Ikaruga
Soundtrack:
-HOLY SHIT THE SOUNDTRACK.
-I think this is my favorite Sonic soundtrack ever.
-I will be coming back to this tag to scream about each and every song in this soundtrack over the next couple of years, mark my words.
-It all bangs. You know it all bangs. Moving on
Story:
-To be honest I wasn't huge on the actual *story,* but I really enjoyed most of the character writing, so I think it all balances out.
-The Kocos were cute. But the Ancients and the End were kinda just there, IMO?
-The Sonic corruption plot being resolved that quickly was kinda dumb. I think it's probably an even bigger anticlimax than the Null Space breakout in Forces was (though the presentation was better, so I can give it that).
-Plot beats aside, I like this Sonic portrayal overall, and Tails and Knuckles were both done SO MUCH justice. I'm so proud of my boys. (The scene where Sonic reassures Tails was the first time I've ever cried at a Sonic game, I- the funny two-tailed fox got to me, ok?)
-I liked Amy too, though I think they might have gone a little *too* subdued with her? I could probably go into some more organized thoughts about her later, but eh
-Sage is where things get a little bit *interesting,* because I really like her as a character. I think the contrasting teal-white vs. red-black color scheme thing ties in really nicely with the Ikaruga hacking minigame duality thing, I like Ryan Bartley's performance, and I mean... she's an AI in the process of self-actualization who (at least to my reading) desperately craves validation, of course I was gonna get attached. And I really like her dynamic with Sonic.
BUT I'm not sure how I feel about her dynamic with Eggman. I'm not necessarily opposed to an Eggdad kind of approach (though I recognize that some people weren't gonna be fond of the Eggdad thing no matter what, and I think they've got the right to feel that way), so I feel like for me personally, had Frontiers taken the time to really develop their dynamic I'd find it easier to swallow. But as-is, it feels too rushed to really justify the departure between how Eggman usually treats his creations and how Eggman treats Sage.
(Personally after that Chaos Island cutscene, I was halfway expecting Sonic to get Sage to join up with the gang and turn against Eggman, like with Knuckles in S3&K. It's been a while since we've seen the "bad guy of the week turns good and teams up with Sonic to defeat Eggman" trope. Maybe I'll write an AU about that someday.)
Anyway, at least she's got the potential to appear in future games courtesy of the true ending, so maybe they'll make some more changes to her dynamic with Eggman later on down the line. I dunno.
-Mike Pollock gives an excellent performance as Eggman (to the surprise of absolutely no one), but other than that... Eggman was just really out of focus in general? I think I saw someone saying that you could probably tweak the story to cut Eggman out of it entirely and not much would change, and I'm inclined to agree. Which is a shame- I was hoping he'd have more of an impact. Getting the seventh Chaos Emerald on Ouranos was nice, but felt like too little too late after he spent most of the game's cutscenes stuck in the same Cyberspace level. (His voice memos talk about seeing replicas of South Island, Westside Island, and even Angel Island in Cyberspace. Give us more locales, you cowards!)
Overall:
-It was pretty clear they ran out of budget after Chaos Island (and I know I'm not the first to say this, either).
-There was a lot of jank, and some questionable decisions in terms of both story and gameplay.
-But... I liked Sonic Frontiers! And I'm glad I get to say that, after the absolute rollercoaster that this entire marketing cycle was.
Anyway, I'm off to go listen to Undefeatable on loop for the next 24 hours. See y'all later!
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Tag some peeps you wanna get to know better!
Tagged by @dinogaby
Favorite color: Blue-gray or Sea-foam Green. It bounces back and forth every now and then.
Currently reading: Haven't picked up a physical book in a long time. I did however complete this amazing fic a while ago called The Ultimate Evil. I 100% recommend reading that and its sequel, especially if you've seen Jackie Chan Adventures and/or have a thing for villain romances. (DONOVAN94 has written more than a few villain romance fanfics including one for Lord Shen and another being a crossover with The Hobbit and Eragon.)
Last song: Vending Machine of Love by The Stupendium.
Last series: I tried watching Mighty Morphin Power Rangers but I just couldn't stick to it. Maybe I'll give it another chance some other day.
Last movie: Ratchet & Clank. It was a tie in to the 2016 reboot.
Sweet/Spicy/Savory: I have to actually think about what I want to taste. Usually its either sweet or savory, nothing too spicy though, mostly because I have no idea how I'll feel afterwards.
Relationship status: Forever single at this point.
Favorite food: Don't really know. Pizza, pasta, chips, just about anything I can feel comfortable with.
Song stuck in my head: anything phonk related. Murder In My Mind by Kordhell. (Love the original but I also love the edited sped up version around 43 seconds)
Last thing I googled: "godzilla body pillow" (It was a TikTok video and I didn't mind my business)
Time: 10:49 PM
Dream vacation: Anywhere I can consider cozy. Maybe someday, if and when I ever consider traveling I do want to be in a mountain lodge. Not like a resort or anything but literally just a little hut in the forest far enough to tell society to go screw itself without consequences.
Currently working on: putting old writing prompts down on paper for future reference/inspiration, and getting to work on rewriting my fanfic.
I’m tagging @alena-1987, @sweatshirt-ninja, @autumn2art, @brightlotusmoon, and @moonprincess101.
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i think i want to tell the version of the story she told me not to, the meandering one that only makes sense in my heart, the one where somehow the girl who grew up counting the cars that we zoomed past in those compact cars tricked herself into thinking that someday we'd stop making out in the car and start proving everyone else wrong, the one where somehow all the roads led right here, the one where i ran away from what in retrospect was good for me and toward something less certain and never learned better, the one where i got hurt and didn't get over it, the one where i'm not perfect or likable or good but i'm alive, the one where i miss what i left behind but i can't bring myself to let go of what i came here looking for, the one where my mother's daughter is worried she hasn't come far enough.
or maybe it isn't that i want to, but that i have to, because the manuscript doesn't sing, it doesn't smell like cigarettes and the ocean breeze in the dead of night on the pacific coast highway, it doesn't glow like the sun on the way to beverly hills when i'm still caffeinated enough to delude myself into believing that was the best love story i'd ever had the privilege to write down. i wrote it and i read it and i put it away, mostly because every time i looked back at it i wished it was different, that i had a neat bow to tie up at the end instead of coming to the conclusion that what i have done for thirty years is drive in a circle and find a new way to fall for it every tie. i wished i had a different ending, and then i wondering if maybe it was still coming, if maybe i just needed to wait, so i drove north and west and south and east, across the country a second time, singing until my throat hurt while i used a bottle of sparkling water as a microphone, stood in the snow while a storm raged around me and whined that i just wanted to get to my hotel, let my eyes well up with tears for no reason whatsoever when the road opened up, got dressed over and over and over and genuinely believed that day it would be different, but the edits never came.
for months, for years, no words ran through my mind on the 10, no poetry emerged in a daydream as i stabilized my speed. i drove miles and miles and miles without pulling off to the side of the road to open this app. i went weeks without publishing a little secret missive to nobody, rode for hours while the bike stood still and never formed a single sentence. i didn't want to write the story the way it felt, so i stopped writing what i wanted next, sat still in my pain and wondered when it would pass, laid in front of the fireplace and hoped i'd eventually feel like myself again.
this isn't the first time, it's sort of always like this, i stand still and i watch the past recede and i get impatient for the next incarnation and brace myself for how unrecognizable i'll become to myself. and hear me out, because i blame all of this on the playlist, on the songs i kept in a bottle and sent away down the river of my heartache because i knew they would do this to me, fill me with sunsets and sepia-tone memories of something that was barely yesterday, make me want to forgive myself and everyone else along with her, compel me to finish what i started, remind me who i am. hear me out, because i don't know where i've been but i want to come back, because i can't explain what i've been doing but i know i don't want to do it anymore, because i'm burned out and tired and falling apart again and this time i really do want it to all be different when i find my way out.
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I'm picking Wage Wars Get Rich Die Handsome because I desperately want season 2 to answer the question of how long Izzy and Ed have known each other but I don't have high hopes. 2 & 5!
What scene did you first put down?
I had to go look at the google doc versions because I legit didn't remember (it has been over a year and I wrote it in less than a week), but it looks like I wrote the whole thing in order. I do kind of remember having that line in my head as the starting point -- and that didn't change from the first draft all the way to the published piece. Just that tiny bit of interiority of Ed getting his first ship was the spark of the thing.
What part was hardest to write?
I remember it being really easy to write, mostly, and the hard part was the feeling of looking back at my own history. Because what I was trying to do was think about what the beginning of a bad thing looks like, when you don't think it IS a bad thing. Things like remembering all the times my ex was critical of stuff and it felt helpful at first and how eventually that became a constant exhausting emotional weight 😅
So the writing flowed, but it did kick my ass a bit, emotionally speaking.
FWIW, I have a draft of a different version of the story where they meet up quite a bit later, which is closer to my current headcanon, so far I have little more than some vague ideas, but I do like the intro:
Two kinds of guys want to be first mate, in Ed's experience: guys on their way up, and guys on their way out. Trouble with the first is obvious. Looking to make their mark, either get their own ship or mutiny yours out from under you.
The second seems like it'd be easier, but those guys? They get lax, they get sloppy. End up with a mistake, or yeah, a mutiny, but the other way. Someone farther down the line thinking: I could do better than that old fart. And then get wondering why captain picked that old fart, and there you are.
Either way, a bit of a time limit on the position, yeah?
Given all that, he's been working on the puzzle of what a third thing might be.
Someday, maybe, I'll come back to the rest - who knows, maybe we'll get just enough in S2 that it'll trigger something :D
[fic asks]
#ask games#my writing#my fic#[slams down glass] ANOTHER!#jkjk (unless)#I'm still very fond of this fic in any case#I have gotten a couple of commenters who Missed The Point tho (that's fine I GUESS)
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Growing up, every 12th of the month feels like i'm going to be swallowed by this colossal doom. The people around me starts decorating their houses colorful lights and ornaments, i hear loud christmas music being played on the stereos over and over again, the grocery store is full of people so busy choosing the ingredients they need for the celebration, and my surrounding starts having this boisterous atmosphere that makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up, and my stomach churn. I swear I've been five years old before and I used to love this. But now happiness feels so unfamiliar that i could almost associate it with a decaying rat on the side of the road - it's disgusting. When did i start hating christmas? When did i start hating new years? Maybe... when adults told me that Santa is real and turns out he isn't. (My parents stopped putting gifts next to my headboard and caressing my face to make i sure i was asleep). Maybe... when adults told me that if i jumped as high as i could while the new year is approaching i would be tall, and i didn't. (I used to write countless resolutions and i still jump as high as i could while everyone counts down but it's years that has passed and I'm still not who I thought I'd be.) Maybe... when I was so used to seeing families being families and young me being me that I forgot time passes and things are meant change. They said that when the new years come you should let go the old version of you - I think they're wrong. Because old me was so lovely and the previous years had taken my old self with them to history, and now I'm nothing but a coalescence of loneliness and hope...
Hope that someday i'll realize that happiness doesn't always look like families eating dinner together on christmas eve and it won't make me feel uneasy anymore...Hope that better years are always going to come and i'll gradually become a better version of myself too - until then, maybe that's how happiness is going to look like for me.
p.s. why do i always feel emotions like this everytime everyone around me seems happy :(( why do i have this urge to be mad when everyone isn't. i know i'm not the only one.
#thoughts#new year#christmas#adulting#writing#feelings#journal#spilled thoughts#spilled journal#spilled ink#shitpost#words
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NaNoWriMo Day 4
Before starting I was really, really nervous I'd go into another emotional spiral like I have at certain points during the past two NaNos.
But I think I'm learning a few things in the process for how to manage that.
1: Do not think about the ultimate fate of this story.
This is ultimately where I get tripped up. I start thinking about how I'd go about publishing a story that is a glorified fanfic of an RP that got cliffhangered as a result of what you could essentially boil down to meddling in a quarrel.
I'm writing a good number of characters I didn't create, and the only ones I've gotten written permission to do so with is the member from the RP I can still contact without consequence.
That said, it was an agreement in our writing group that if one person disappears, their characters get NPCed and anyone can use them to move the plot along so they can finish the story.
That's basically what I'm operating on here. And... A /lot/ got left behind in the collateral damage that resulted in this RP getting marooned on the island of unfinishedness. So since 2019 when it all went down I've been struggling to pick up the pieces of what was left behind.
It's been a painful process, which has led me to my second point:
2: Stop caring that you're not following the original vision for the project.
Slowly I think I'm becoming more confident in my characterizations of the waylaid characters and my own direction for the story. In looking back through conversations I found a number of points I deviated from. And honestly I still want to find a place for Gao in this next section I'm writing. Maybe he'll show up, maybe he won't, but there's always another draft if I want to try tweaking the plot.
But yeah. I think... those are two big things that are making me happier with the project at this stage. Putting off thoughts about the fate of the project and growing confident in my own version of the story.
Maybe someday I'll have to change names and do some hard work to separate my story from Terramun the RP. But today is not that day. Right now all I have to concern myself with is getting Elyse to the finish line. And I'm happy with where it's going. It may not be what my friend envisioned, but other than the hints they scattered throughout the RP and throughout various conversations, I have nothing else to go off of. And if I want to stick closer to that vision, I'll do it in another draft. Right now, I just want to get Elyse to the finish line.
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13 / 10 / 14 / 15 For the OFMD ask meme?
13 Did Ed really plan to murder Stede when he told Izzy the plan?
100%. Like, he's very clearly not happy about it -- he and Stede have a pretty instantaneous rapport that can't be read as anything other than completely sincere -- but he definitely means it in the moment. He abandons that plan very soon thereafter, but I don't think we'd get him tearfully confessing that he meant to burn off Stede's face and steal his identity during the bathtub scene if he didn't, at some point, intend to do just that.
10 What the fuck is Izzy’s problem? Is it/should it be fixable?
Oooooh boy. Okay, so fair warning that while I adore Izzy as a character, I am not, uh, particularly sympathetic in some ways? I'm like 45% "what a funny feral little man" and 45% "I would enjoy seeing him get his comeuppance" and maybe 10% "Con O'Neill's voice is very sexy to me and I'm weak."
Anyway.
Short-ish answer, because there is admittedly a longer one: I think that within the story, Izzy's primary problem is that he's convinced himself that everything he's doing is for Ed's own good, but Izzy inherently does not understand Ed or conceptualize him as a whole person rather than the very specific version of Edward/Blackbeard that exists in his head. This is clear pretty much from moment one in ways that have very little to do with Stede, or the way we later see him explicitly ignore what Ed says he needs and wants in favor of what Izzy thinks he needs. He's been working with Ed for some mumble mumble period of time, and the clouds-that-look-like-frankfurters thing just flies completely over his head. He admires Ed as this hypercompetent sailor, but is also very quick to dismiss Ed's observations because they look a bit more whimsical than he's comfortable with.
Insofar as what is narratively wrong with Izzy, he is to Ed what the Badmintons are to Stede: the voice of the status quo, there to drag one of our deuteragonists back into the kind of toxic masculinity that the show is very explicitly condemnatory of. It's not an accident that one episode after Chauncy derails Stede's attempts to move toward something healthy and loving by playing on his insecurities and fears, Izzy is there doing approximately the same thing with Ed.
That being said, I think we have like 50/50 odds of an Izzy redemption arc in the future, and I'm fine with that. Someday I'll write a whole bit of meta about how important it is that we see Fang and Ivan talking about how it makes Fang feel when Izzy pulls his beard and how Ivan is nothing but supportive during that conversation, long before either of them have any significant exposure to the talk-it-through culture of the Revenge; I think at the end of the day, this is a narrative that supports the idea that men will seek healthier ways of communicating and relating to each other if given the opportunity. Izzy has already been given a lot more complexity and nuance than someone like the Badmintons, and I don't think it's outside of the realm of possibility that we'll see him growing and changing in future seasons.
It's either that or we'll see him go full-throated villain, which tbh I'm also fine with.
14 Favorite AU idea?
So!!! Confession time: I'm in general not a huge fan of anything other than the close-canon, what-if kind of AU. That being said, there are always exceptions. Pretty please drop your favorite AU fics in my inbox or the replies.
15 What’s your number one wish for season 2 (besides happening at all or couples being reunited)?
a) If you've read my fic, you know that what I want most in this world is Ed and Stede bonding with the half of the crew that they each got in the divorce.
b) More of Vico Ortiz's face and also the pink robe of gay sadness, because my needs are really very simple and straightforward at the end of the day.
#ofmd ask game#ofmd spoilers#tumblr decided to do this as a numbered list where all the numbers are one and i'm sorry?#it's terrible and i don't know how to fix it#ofmd#thank you nonny for the generous asking this was fun!
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