#anyways i’m sad that the wild hearts tour is over tomorrow | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mellowswriting · 3 years

Note

OMG CONGRATS ON THE FOLLOWERS MY LOVE!!!!💙💙 I would love to request something angst but with a happy ending with Frankie please!!! I’m open for anything! Thank you so much!!!

Always

pairing || Frankie ‘Catfish’ Morales x Reader

summary || You step in when Frankie’s ex leaves him with their baby and in turn, find your own little family.

word count || 7,213

warnings || angst, hurt/comfort, parental abandonment

a/n || Thank you so much! Somehow this started as something small and then exploded into my longest fic on this blog. Enjoy! (p.s this gif does things to me smh)

Main Masterlist | Join the taglist!

The last thing you expected was a phone call at the crisp time of 11:43 pm. It had been a long day already with your job being a disaster and you were half tempted to just let it ring so you could stay in the warm, safe cocoon of your bed...but something in your gut nagged at you to pick up, told that it was important. The bleary sight of Frankie’s name on your phone screen had you sitting up and rushing to hit the green ‘accept call’ button - he would never call this late unless it was serious.

He sounded wrecked, his voice panic-stricken and cracking over words too rushed for you to understand, and your heart began pounding. In all of your years of knowing Francisco Morales, you had never heard him like this. Not when he called you while he was out on deployment, not when he whispered to you about the horrors he had seen overseas, not when you comforted him after the shitshow that happened in South America.

“Frankie, slow down. I can’t understand you,” You tried to make your voice calm and reassuring but your worry bubbled through anyway, and you threw back the warm comfort of your blankets to scramble for clothes. Whatever this was, you needed to be there. There was no way in hell you would just listen to your best friend go through it over the phone. “What’s going on?”

A deep, shuddering breath crackled through the receiver, then “Eliza left us. She just...she just fucking left.”

Your breath caught in your throat and acidic anger ripped up through your chest, nearly suffocating you in it’s intensity. The mere idea of her walking out on Frankie and their new baby after all she had already put him through...god, you could just scream. It was forced down with a harsh swallow - it was not the time for your own anger. With your sweatpants and hoodie yanked on, you paused, struggling to find any words of comfort. “I’m on my way, okay? I’ll be there soon.”

“Ok” Frankie whispered and that was how you knew just how bad it was - he didn’t try to convince you not to come out so late or that you could just come in the morning like he did any other time he was in crisis. “Please don’t hang up.”

“Frankie…” You whispered. Your heart ached for him, wrestling with your anger. “I won’t. I’ll stay on the line, I promise.”

You rambled about any and everything as you drove. He needed to hear your voice, needed to be distracted, but you felt a bit ridiculous talking about the boring things you dealt with at work that day while he was in crisis. It helped, obvious by the way his breathing evened out as he listened and hummed in response.

There was no telling just how many traffic laws you broke as you sped the few blocks between your home and his. All you could do was be glad you weren't pulled over and managed to throw your car in park and kill the engine in the gravel driveway within ten minutes of leaving your own house. The front door swung open before you even managed to get out of your car and you practically sprinted up the steps to wrap your best friend in your arms.

Frankie stumbled back slightly as you collided with his chest but he curled his arms around your waist and buried his face in your neck nonetheless. No words passed through the nonexistent space between you. There wasn’t any need. You pushed the door closed behind you before you led him further into his living room and settled next to him on the couch. The sight of his bloodshot eyes and the exhausted slope to his shoulders had a wild mix of anger and sadness whirling through you.

“Where’s Isabella?” You whispered.

“She’s asleep upstairs. Eliza dropped her off and she just...slept right through it all, the entire argument.” His voice was hoarse, a testament to his rough night. “I...I can’t do this on my own.”

“Hey, you aren’t on your own.” You said, your tone soft but leaving no room for argument. “I’m not going to tell you it’s going to be easy, but you sure as hell aren’t alone. You have me and the boys. God knows Santi will be happy to flex his status as godfather even more.”

That pulled a half-hearted smile from Frankie. It was fleeting, gone in less than a second, but you counted it as a win nonetheless. Watching that far away look return to his eyes made you chest ache and you were desperate to break the spell of worry and anger that hung over him. Somehow knowing that you couldn’t even if you tried brought you no closer to peace.

“Have you eaten?” You asked as you carefully brushed a hand through his hair, appreciating the curls that were usually hidden under his hat. Frankie leaned into the touch and you smiled softly at his acceptance of the comfort you offered.

“No, but I can’t eat right now.” Frankie grumbled. The intensity of the anger, the shock, the fear, it all gave way to a mind-numbing exhaustion and he just wanted to sleep. You sighed but didn’t push him. “M’tired.”

“Alright, c’mon. Let’s get you to bed.” You heaved yourself from the couch and offered Frankie a hand to pull him along with you. He grumbled quietly to himself as you ushered him up the stairs, the both of you mindful of the sleeping baby. Frankie flipped the baby monitor on and took a moment to observe the grainy image of his little girl, fast asleep and entirely unaware that their lives had just changed drastically.

“She deserves better than a broken family.” Frankie whispered, the image of defeat as he sat heavily on the edge of his bed. There was nothing for you to say in that moment, nothing that would ease his burden or change his mind. So instead of speaking, you just sat next to him and wrapped an arm around his shoulders, pulled him into your side and rubbed his back in slow strokes. Just when you thought he might be calm enough to lay down and get some sleep, Frankie went stiff against you and groaned. “Fuck, I have work tomorrow!”

He was up and pacing a hole in the floor before you could even blink, grumbling out a quiet rant about the insanity of his situation. It seemed like he was a step away from spiraling out completely - and you knew just how to prevent that. Francisco Morales was a military man through and through; give him clear instructions and he’ll tackle a task with all he’s got. All he needed was for someone to help him see past the panic to the next step.

“Frankie, stop.” You stepped in his way and put both of your hands on his shoulders firmly, only continuing when he finally looked you in your eyes. “Call the office now and leave a message for them to cancel your tours for the next couple of days so you can get your head on straight. It’s a family emergency. They’ll understand. And after you call them, you need to lay down and at least rest your body, because Isabella will need to be fed in a few hours and you need to get some sleep while you can. I’m staying the night -”

“Wait, what? No, you don’t have to -” Frankie interrupted but was met with your finger at his lips, almost cracking up when he pouted against it.

“I don’t have to, you’re right. But my best friend needs my help and the little girl that I adore deserves to have a dad who isn’t ripping his hair out from stress. If the tables were turned and I was the one in this position, would you let me convince you to leave?” You took your hand away from his face when you shook his head ‘no’ and you gave him a small smile. “Exactly. So, I’m staying the night and I’ll be here to help wherever you need for as long as you need me. Okay?”

Frankie nodded. After that, it was easy to get him burrowed under his covers. His eyes drooped the second he was settled, and with a final brush of his hair off of his forehead, you turned to head back downstairs and set up a makeshift bed on the couch. A hand shot out from under the blankets to latch onto your wrist and Frankie sounded almost child-like when he whispered, “Please stay.”

And who were you to deny such a sweet plea? You curled up on the opposite side of the bed, exhaustion finally dragging you under after the day’s insanity. Two hours later when a shrill cry had you both sitting bolt upright, you threw back the covers and slid out of the warmth of Frankie’s bed right along with him.

“You go make her a bottle and I’ll check her diaper, alright? You asked around a yawn, already shuffling off to the nursery. Frankie made a tired noise of agreement and went downstairs, leaving you to scoop up his crying infant from her crib. “Hi, Bella. Let’s get you changed, yeah? Does that sound good?”

Once she had a clean diaper, you carefully carried her down the stairs and into the kitchen where her father was warming up a bottle. He smiled at the both of you as you approached and reached out to rub his daughter’s back where she lay against you, chest-to-chest. You could see the doubts worming their way back to the forefront of his mind by the way his smile faltered, and you put Isabella into his capable hands.

“We’ve got this, Frankie. One day at a time.” You murmured to him before leaning down to coo at Isabella, grinning when she gave you a gummy smile. “Yeah, your daddy has you. Everything’s gonna be just fine.”

And as you looked at the matching pairs of chocolate eyes sparkling at you in the low light of the kitchen, you could feel in your gut that you were right.

----------------------------

After three weeks of staying at Frankie’s house nearly every night, the two of you had a schedule down packed and after two entire months, Frankie realized you were right. It sure as hell wasn’t easy - far from it, in fact - but everyone had stepped up just like you said. You would care for Isabella when Frankie was at work more often than not with Will and Pope picking up responsibility here and there where they could. The true savior here was you. You woke with Frankie in the morning, held his daughter up so he could kiss her forehead before he left for work, cared for her until he came home, and still stuck around to help after.

You were a fucking goddess, and Frankie knew he would be lost without you.

Each day that passed had Frankie’s anger dissipating just a bit more. With his focus solely on establishing a new normal for his daughter, there wasn’t really time for him to think about just how screwed over he got. He was fooling himself into thinking that the storm of emotions that thundered in his chest didn’t need to be handled. Logically, he knew that. The clouds would crack and it would all pour from him eventually, he just didn’t know when.

The boiling point hit on a Saturday. A beautiful day by all other standards; the sun was bright in the cloudless sky, leaving the air shimmering with warmth. The plan was to take a walk to the park with Isabella before meeting the guys for lunch, even though she wasn’t really big enough to enjoy the jungle gyms. In reality, Frankie just wanted to spend some time with his two favorite girls out in the sun. You had Isabella on the couch, getting her dressed after changing her diaper and rambling at her all the while.

Frankie loved the way you talked to his daughter, as if she was entirely invested in whatever mundane story from work you were recounting, taking her gurgles and the spit bubbles she blew as excited responses. The stack of mail in his hand momentarily forgotten, he leaned over the back of the couch with a small laugh.

“Ya know, I don’t think she understands the intricacies of office politics.” He teased, his grin growing when you tossed him a glare that had no heat behind it.

“And I don’t think she understands the intricacies of piloting helicopters, but you don’t hear me making fun of you when you ramble on about rotors at three in the morning.” You grumbled. The smile on your face betrayed any attempt to sound annoyed.

Frankie barked out a laugh. “Touche.”

With Isabella dressed and ready to rumble, Frankie intended to give the mail in his hands a once-over before heading out the door - until a large, yellow envelope with the state’s stamp inked in the corner caught his eye. What the hell did he do to have the state government contacting him? He racked his mind as he tore the envelope open, trying to think of any recent wrongdoings that could’ve gotten him into some legal mess. Maybe that red light last month actually caught his license plate last month. God, this was the last thing he needed right now with everything else he had going on, and -

The five words stamped across the top of the papers made his heart lurch in his chest. ‘Voluntary Relinquishment of Parental Rights’, right there in bold lettering. Eliza’s signature was scrawled at the bottom along with a notary’s. He expected sadness, even tears, but no.

No, Frankie was fucking enraged.

White hot anger surged, leaving his teeth gritted and the papers crumpled slightly in his clenched fist. It had been years since he felt that kind of rage, somehow even worse than the anger he felt during the absolute shitshow that was the mission in South America. A shuddered breath escaped from behind his teeth as he desperately tried to grasp the urge to throw the papers to the ground, along with anything else within his reach.

“Frankie?” The sound of your voice calling out to him sweetly, laced with concern and confusion, somehow only made that rage spike. The fact that you had put your entire life on hold to help him care for his child, the child Eliza swore up and down that she wanted with him before disappearing on them both, had him infuriated on your behalf as well as his own. Just how many lives was Eliza going to change forever with no remorse? Frankie tossed the entire pile of mail on the couch and stormed off to the kitchen, not wanting you or Isabella to see him in such a state.

He had no idea how long he stood braced against the kitchen counter with his eyes squeezed shut, desperately trying to find a way to tamp down on the intensity rolling through him. There was a quiet conversation coming from the living room, two voices too low for him to make out, and there was suddenly a hand on his own. Frankie finally opened his eyes to see you standing next to him, giving him a soft look that disarmed him and made him feel guilty all at once.

You shouldn’t have to be here. You shouldn’t have to deal with the bullshit that always seemed to follow Frankie around every fucking corner. You were too good for his troubles, you deserved better. Frankie hated that he had brought you down this hole with him.

“Where’s Isabella?” Frankie croaked out.

“I called Will, he’s got her in the living room.” You said, your voice just as soft as the expression on your face, and Frankie wanted nothing more than to bury his face in your neck and cry or smash something on the ground just for the satisfaction of seeing it break. The confliction of his wants only made him angrier. “I saw the papers. What do you need?”

“What do I need?” Frankie repeated with a humorless chuckle before hitting the countertop with a clenched fist, just hard enough to make pain shoot up his arm - and the dam broke. “Anything! Anything but a life where the mother of my child doesn’t abandon us at the drop of a fucking hat!”

The coffee mug that sat next to the coffeemaker was the unfortunate victim his impulses chose to meet the sudden, desperate need to get this rage out of his body. His arm reared back, ready to smash the ceramic mug right onto the tile, but the firm grab of two hands kept the lucky cup in one piece. You grabbed his forearm with one hand and wrapped the other over his, securing the mug in his grip as you stepped into his space and settled him with a firm look.

“No, not here. Not like this, not with Isabella so close by.” Shame lanced through Frankie viciously. You were right, as always. How fucking stupid was he to think - “Let’s go.”

“What?” was all he could mutter as you set down the mug and began pulling him towards the front door.

“You’ve got Isabella, right?” You asked Will when you paused to fish your keys from the table next to his door, only continuing in your march towards your car when Will confirmed. Frankie’s guilt-ridden confusion only grew as you pulled out of his driveway after ushering him into your passenger seat. “You need to deal with this in a healthy way. Because god knows you have every reason to be downright enraged. Hell, I even wanted to throw shit around for a while.”

Frankie could only stare at you, his anger and frustration simmering lower the more you spoke. There was a light in your eyes that he recognized, the same one that you had last year when he had to comfort you through the downfall and heartache of your last relationship. It was anger and sadness all wrapped up into an intense shine he recognized all too well.

“But we are going to do these the smart way.” You continued and met his eyes as you pulled up to idle at a red light. There was… something there beneath the empathy, something hovering at the edges of your expression that he just couldn’t place. “Because you are my best friend and I love you and your daughter way too much to let you destroy yourself.”

Heat flushed up his neck at the candidness of your words. Oh, god, he could not let that tiny, hopeful part of his brain latch onto that at run with it. No, it would reignite too many old feelings and needs to let himself hope. Of course you loved him and his child - you were his best friend after all. There was no point in letting himself even consider it beyond that. Not when he could destroy everything good he had left in his life.

Frankie just nodded, trusting in whatever you had in mind. Less than five minutes later, you pulled into the town’s recreational fields and it clicked in his brain. The batting cages. He smiled slightly despite his inner turmoil. This was exactly where he had taken you when you finally got over the shock of your ex-boyfriend’s betrayal and stepped right into an unfathomable rage.

He let you put the ridiculous helmet on his head and gratefully took the aluminum baseball bat from your hands once you got to the small fenced area where he could finally let out his anger. The quarters clinked as you slid them into the slot and you smiled at him from behind the fence.

“You might feel stupid at first, but it helps.” You called out over the whirring of the pitching machine powering up and Frankie laughed. He had told you the exact same thing, verbatim when you had complained that the whole idea was ridiculous.

The harsh crack of the bat meeting that first baseball was like taking a sledgehammer to the wall he had built around his anger. The next one had him grunting into the effort he put behind the swing of the bat, letting every bit of his rage and resentment sing in his veins and bleed into the impact against the ball. Each swing had him building up, had tension racking his back and shoulders only to be released with the ringing sound of aluminum and revived the moment his arms fell to his sides.

“I just...I can’t fucking comprehend it! First, she was so excited. Went on and on about having the whole thing. ” He called out through each swing, knowing you were there behind him, hanging off of the fence to watch and listen. “The house and the kids and the - the fucking white picket fence life. All of it! And then she wanted all of that, but not with me. No, she’d co-parent and find some other man to shack up with because apparently I wasn’t enough for her. Yeah, it hurt and all but at least she was still around! And out of nowhere, she just fucking left! It’s bullshit!”

The aluminum echoed harshly where Frankie threw it to the ground, his hands ripping his hat off to muse his hair roughly before settling back on his head. Every ball hit was like a point knocked off of his frustration. It wasn’t exactly fun, but it felt good.

“Another round?” You asked and Frankie turned to see you with more quarters poised and ready to send more baseballs flying at his head. He nodded, more grateful for you than ever in that moment.

“But at the same time, I am so glad she left when she did. It’s so conflicting because I’m pissed that she put us through that but at least it’s over!” Frankie continued, the pressure finally easing in his chest as he said the things that were building in his mind the last two months. “She jerked me around for so fucking long. At least I don’t have to worry that she’ll change her mind again. At least I can… move on, move forward in my life.”

He didn’t even have to ask you for another round when the last ball had been pitched. This time, he said nothing. Neither did you. Frankie just needed to vent, to be heard. He didn’t need advice or pity or words of encouragement. Well, the encouragement he would need later. The rest would just make him even more angry. Every crack of the bat meeting a ball had the anger receding and exhaustion creeping up to take its place. There was a special kind of relief in the absence of anger - it didn’t exactly feel good, but it wasn’t bad either. Almost numbing.

The bat clattered to the ground after the last ball was sent rocketing into the netting. Frankie was done, for now at least. It would come creeping back in, he knew, but he also knew he could handle it. He felt like he could handle anything with you by his side, with your support and… and your love. It was nice to be taken care of for once. You took the bat back to the office as he plopped himself down at a picnic table and a few moments later, a cool water bottle, dripping with condensation was pressed against the back of his neck. It was soothing against his skin, overheated by the harsh sun.

The two of you sat together at that table for nearly an hour, not having to speak to convey how either of you felt in that moment. Frankie was beyond grateful, and he could tell you were happy he was feeling better just by the way you rubbed a hand between his shoulder blades. He almost lamented at the loss of your touch when you pulled that hand away, only to have you settle it on his just like you did back in the kitchen.

You were always there, always managed to make him feel better. Even when his life was crumbling around him, there was solace to be found in you. In your words, your touch. You never made him feel ashamed when he exposed his sadness or his anger, never made him feel less than. It was impossible for that small flame not to flicker back to life deep in his heart. The spark of hope for the future, especially if you were in it.

“Thank you.” Frankie choked out, unable to express himself any more than that. It didn’t matter, he knew that. You knew how much this little foray into stress relief helped him.

“Always, Frankie.”

Later that night when all was quiet in his home, when the Miller brothers and Pope had left and Isabella was safely asleep in her crib, Frankie was still exhausted. The boys had come over instead of dragging him out to a restaurant and it was a blast, as always, but he couldn’t help the heavy way his shoulders were set for the rest of the day. He just wanted to sleep.

The last thing he expected was the tears. An overwhelming feeling of being entirely unwanted washed over him and he was too damn tired to fight it off, so he sat himself on the edge of the bed and cried. No matter how logical he was with himself, no matter how much he reminded himself that he was well loved despite Eliza, the feeling just would not shake.

Embarrassment layered on top of the sadness when you popped your head into his bedroom, hair still wet from the shower you just took. Frankie wiped the tears away with rough fingers as he turned away from you, giving an entirely fake laugh in a vain attempt to brush it off. He should’ve known better. You padded right up to him and gently cupped his cheek to guide him to look back up at you, and the understanding smile you gave him paired to the gentle brush of your thumb under his eye to wipe a stray tear away had his chin trembling against his will.

“C’mon,” You whispered. Frankie watched you clamber onto his bed through tear-blurred eyes and settle against his pillows, your arms open in an invitation for comfort that he took without a second thought. Frankie laid his head on your chest, wrapped one arm around your waist, and closed his eyes before he could talk himself out of it. This was dangerous ground, letting himself take comfort in you this way. You brushed your hand through his hair, sighing softly as you relaxed. “We’ve got this. You know that, right?”

“Yeah.” Frankie’s voice was slurred slightly with his sleepiness, the craziness of the day finally pulling him under. “Yeah, we do.”

---------------------

At eight months old, Isabella was growing into a vibrant, happy little girl and you couldn’t be more proud. You hadn’t expected to play such a large role in her life, but now you couldn’t imagine doing anything else. According to her pediatrician, little Bella was as healthy as a horse and blossoming. ‘A textbook case of healthy development’ was what she had said at the last checkup, leaving you and Frankie to grin at each other. The first appointment after Eliza left was nerve racking with Frankie bouncing anxiously the entire time until Dr.Weston gave them the exact same response - Frankie’s daughter was right on track.

The relief on his face had broken your heart. How could that man ever think he wasn’t doing right by his little girl? You saw him with her every single day. You saw the way he babbled along with her while spooning baby food into her mouth. You watched him lie on his belly with her in the living room during tummy-time, trying to help her strengthen her neck. You woke up to him stripping the blankets off of the bed when she couldn’t fall asleep anywhere but his arms and wanted her in bed with you both. If there was anyone who could attest that Francisco Morales was an amazing father, it was you.

And you made sure to tell him that, as often as you could. It made the most delicious flush creep up his neck and paired with that bashful smile he tried to hide by pulling the brim of his hat further down, you could barely keep yourself from kissing him. Guilt ate you alive every single time you had those urges. Frankie was thriving after such an awful ordeal, and there you were, lusting after him like some over-excitable teenager.

It was impossible not to feel so... domestic in your current set up. You slept at Frankie’s so often that your own home felt almost foreign when you would show up for more clothes or to grab something for work. You worked from his kitchen table or couch, tapping away at your laptop as Isabella slept or played on her playmat in front of you. The instinct to refer to Frankie’s house as ‘home’ and the way you saw the three of you as a little family was new and something you had to nip in the bud right away.

That type of thinking would inevitably end in heartbreak when Frankie sent you on your way once he didn’t need as much help with Isabella. At least you knew it wouldn’t be anytime soon and could enjoy it while it lasted, especially since the home was currently plagued with a two word nightmare neither of you expected.

Sleep. Regression.

You sat in the glider with Isabella slumped against your chest, her cute little face pressed against your sternum as you rocked sleepily. Her eyelids fluttered every now and then, but there was yet to be a moment you could settle her into her bed. Frankie had tried before you, but even daddy’s arms weren’t good enough for the fussy baby. He was rooting around downstairs, searching for a little stuffed hippo that sometimes helped her calm down, but at that point, you were willing to just sleep right there in her nursery.

The door cracked open slowly and you peeked one eye open to see Frankie shake his head slightly as he walked in. You held back a sigh. That damned stuffed hippo was going to be the death of all three of you, apparently. Frankie made an urgent noise and your eyes flew open, your eyebrows pinching together in confusion. With a baby constantly on the verge of either falling asleep or waking up, the two of you learned to communicate without words, instead using pointed looks and hand gestures to get a point across.

Frankie gave a pointed look Isabella and you tilted your head down to get a good look at her, and good god you could barely believe your luck. A very long, drawn out transfer from your chest to her crib later, and you and Frankie were creeping out of the nursery, careful to avoid the creaky sections of the hallway. The second the door was closed, you held up a hand for a quiet high five with the goofiest grin on your face, and Frankie obliged with a chuckle.

You practically threw yourself onto the bed you were starting to consider your own, yet another dangerous road, you knew that much. The stubbornness both you and Frankie held strong to had neither of you willing to let the other take the couch, insisting that ‘no, you need good sleep.’ and ‘well, you do, too!’. Each night you spent curled up next to him and waking up a hairsbreadth from each other had you positively yearning.

It was nearly three in the morning and both of you had work in a few hours. The idea filled you with dread, and that was how you found yourself whispering to Frankie that you were calling out because ‘exhaustion is the best reason to use a sick day’. He cracked up at your antics as he crawled in next to you, but the look he gave you once he was settled in… it made your heart flutter in your chest. It was an exhausted, relieved, and grateful expression all rolled into one and in that moment, you felt like you could look at him forever.

You didn’t get the chance to. Frankie slid his arm under your shoulders and pulled you against him. It was too familiar of an embrace for you to shy away, even though you knew you should. You should’ve stayed on your side of the bed with plenty of space between you if you wanted to avoid heartbreak, but instead, you snuggled close to him and set your head right on his chest. You could let yourself indulge in the fantasy that he was yours for just a bit longer, especially if it meant getting this unforgettable experience of curling up with the man you adored.

The steady rhythm of his heartbeat lulled you closer to the abyss of sleep, until his chest rumbled as he spoke, making you blink up at him.

“Thank you, cariño.” Frankie settled his hand against your head, playing gently with your hair.

“Always, Frankie.” You whispered back, a smile on your face even as you slipped into the most peaceful rest you had in years.

-----------------------

The house was full of people. For the first time in months, Frankie threw a cookout. It was something you had missed dearly, inviting everyone over for food and beers and a bonfire if the mood was right. Isabella was beyond happy to see everyone she loved all at once, the nine month old squealing with delight at each person who scooped her up from her bouncer. You watched carefully, always ready to swoop in if needed while Frankie ran in and out of the house between the kitchen, grill, and living room.

You had been worried it might be too much for him, the pressure of so much socializing after such a hard time, but he was all grins and twinkling eyes as he ran about. It warmed your heart to see that happiness radiating off of him. God, had you missed it. Things were finally looking up and it felt as if you had let go of a breath that was held in for far too long.

Almost everyone was out in the backyard, soaking up the last of summer before fall got her chilly grip on the world, with you and a few others inside chatting. Isabella had just woken up and boy was she ready to go. Those chubby little legs flailed as you wrestled her into a clean diaper and back into her pretty pink dress. You leaned back with a small laugh once she was finally dressed, letting her have the free reign to roll over onto her belly.

You glanced up at Will where he sat on the couch a few feet away taking a break from all the chitchat, and he grinned at you, muttering something about her being just like her father. You couldn’t agree more. You went to pick her up and carry her outside where she could get some sun and squeal at more guests, but your hand met the carpet instead. Isabella grinned at you less than a foot away, propped up on all fours as she scrambled away so quickly you worried she would get rug burn before you realized - holy shit, she’s crawling.

“Go get Frankie!” You said to Will, who was staring at Isabella with a proud grin. He jumped to his feet, ever the good soldier taking commands, and you scooped the giggling little girl into your arms. “Look at you go! Oh, I’m so proud of you, sweet girl!”

A frazzled Frankie skidded around the corner out of nowhere, half of the crowd piling in behind him in worry, and internally you cursed Will for not informing him that nothing was wrong. Before Frankie could even ask, you motioned for him to sit down a few feet from you and he listened despite the deeply confused look he wore.

“Are you gonna show daddy your new trick, Bella? Huh? Go on,” You cooed as you set her back down on her hands and knees, and she took off like a bat outta hell, scrambling for her father, who watched with wide eyes. Frankie broke off into a loud laugh and picked her up to cradle her against his chest, his eyes bright with unshed, happy tears as the crowd of friends and family let out whoops and claps.

“Oh my god!” Frankie laughed wetly, shuffling forward on his knees to pull you in for a hug with his little girl in between you. Your cheeks hurt with the huge smile you wore as you wrapped your arms around him. The way he looked at you tore through your chest with the most pleasurable kind of pain and the urge to kiss him would have been undeniable if not for the friends that surrounded you. So you cleared your throat and leaned back, pushing his bicep gently.

“You better get back to that grill before everyone in here starves to death.” You tease and leave it at that, gathering Isabella in your arms to take her outside. What you didn’t see was Pope grabbing Frankie and dragging him up the stairs before he could make it outside along with you. You flounced about the backyard, the hem of your sundress fluttering at your knees as you let everyone get a chance to coo at the happy girl in your arms.

Everyone was so happy, all smiles and laughs as they caught up with each other about the various going-ons of their lives, and you wanted to capture it so you could look back on the happy memories.

“Hey, I left my phone upstairs. Do you mind if I leave her with you? I should be right back.” You asked Pope’s girlfriend, Jessa, who eagerly accepted the baby time.

You climbed the stairs easily, humming some silly tune as you pushed open Frankie’s door. With your phone fully charged, you popped it off of the charger and sat on the edge of the bed to check your notifications. There were few messages here and there, mostly from people letting you know they were on their way a few hours ago, so you were content to make your way back outside with the sound of voices caught your attention. It was a low, metallic sounding conversation, but the TV was off, leaving only…

On the screen of the baby monitor were Frankie and Pope, both of them standing with their arms crossed tightly over their chests. If you didn’t know better you would have been worried they were about to fight with the way they glared at each other, but whatever it was wasn’t any of your business. You were going to leave but the sound of your name made you pause. Eavesdropping is wrong, you reminded yourself, even if you were painfully curious, and you made for the door once more until you heard Pope said, “You have to tell her, Fish!” and you froze entirely.

“That woman loves you! She loves your little girl. You’re going to lose out on a good thing if you keep going like this, man!” Pope hissed and for a second, all you could hear was your own heartbeat. He couldn’t mean what you hoped he meant… right?

“I can’t! Isabella is already down one parent, and that… that amazing woman stepped in and saved us both. What kind of a father would I be if I risked my daughter losing a good woman? And for what? Because I'm in love? Absolutely not.” Frankie said in a tone you had never heard from him before. It was harsh, ringing with finality, and it absolutely tore your heart in two.

But the halves of your heart were made whole by the single sentence, ‘Because I’m in love’. Frankie loved you. He said it. You heard it with your own two ears and suddenly those fears of yours felt absolutely ridiculous. That man and his daughter was your family, no two ways about it. And you couldn’t let him go on thinking that you didn’t love your little family more than anything in the world.

So you snuck back downstairs, your heart flying in your chest as you rejoined the little party and tried to act as normally as possible. In reality, you were paying more attention to the back door than anyone who tried to talk to you, giving little ‘mhmm’s instead of answering the questions anyone asked you.

Yeah, you could be entirely oblivious sometimes.

The second Pope and Frankie emerged from the back door you were on the move, excusing yourself from the conversation you hadn’t really been a part of anyway. The confused look Frankie gave you when you asked to talk to him inside was being adorable, his eyebrows scrunched together and head tilted to the side just slightly. He followed you in nonetheless, leaning against the kitchen counter as he popped open a sweating beer. Before he can even ask what’s going on, you step into his space and put your hands on his chest gently, watching as his confusion melts into surprise.

“You are never going to lose me.” You whisper. “Neither of you.”

A blush bloomed up his neck and over his cheeks. “You...you heard that?”

“Didn’t mean to, scouts honor.” You smiled at him, trying to imbue him with the ease and absolute happiness you felt. “The baby monitor was on.”

“Oh.”

You can’t help but chuckle at the simple response and press up on your tiptoes, your hands sliding up to drape over his shoulders so you could play with the curls at the nape of his neck. The breathy sound that escaped Frankie’s chest had your need mounting, desperate to feel his lips on yours, and you lean forward to brush your nose along his. “Say it, Frankie.”

“I love you.” He said it immediately, whispered it into you with a grin so bright it lit up the room with his happiness. “I love you so much.”

“I love you, too.” You barely get it out before he leans forward to kiss you, soft and desperate and happy, all at once. Frankie’s hands fell to your hips and pulled your body flush against his, and it made you to grin against his lips.

You were giddy. That was the only way to describe the excitement that left you almost vibrating with energy as you melted against Frankie’s chest. His lips were sweet, touched by the strawberries and grapes he snacked on as he grilled.

“You love me, huh?” He muttered and pressed his forehead to yours, eyes closed with a goofy smile that made your heart lurch in your chest.

“Always, Frankie.”

#frankie morales x reader #frankie 'catfish' morales x reader #frankie 'catfish' morales #francisco morales x reader #frankie morales x y/n #frankie morales x you #frankie 'catfish' morales x y/n #frankie 'catfish' morales x you #francisco morales #Triple Frontier #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal character fanfiction

528 notes · View notes

tobin-heaths · 4 years

Text

Remember me

request: Alex has been incredibly busy lately and basically forgetting dates/neglecting her gf. Her gf, R is understanding for the most part but can't help feel insecure and starts pulling away and distancing herself from Alex. Alex at first doesn't think much of it but then realizes whats happening and feels guilty. She decides to make it up to R and show her how much she loves her and how beautiful she thinks she is.

pairing: Alex Morgan x Reader

words: 1839

You knew it would happen again but you didn't expect it so soon. You thought you were prepared and that it wouldn't hurt, that you wouldn't let it hurt you anymore.

You were so wrong.

How disappointed can one feel when left sitting alone in a restaurant at a table meant for two?

You waited for more than an hour before the sadness took over. Alex had promised to come, she promised you with everything she had and yet there was no sign of the brunette.

Alex and you were dating for quite a while now and there was a time where you thought nothing could possibly ever hurt you again with her by your side.

Your head hang low and in shame as the waiter came back to your table looking at you with pity. "I don't think she'll be showing up today, Miss." He said.

"No, I don't think so either. I'd like to pay the bill now though." You took the last sip from the champagne you ordered and tried to hold your tears back.

Your phone was laying next to you, no calls or messages from your girlfriend. You didn't know what to do, you wanted to call her and scream at her, tell her all about the pain she had caused you over the last few months.

But that wasn't fair to her. Alex worked hard and way too much since winning the World Cup in July. The whole journey had been amazing but also exhausting.

Alex had photoshoots after photoshoots, countless interviews and not to mention the victory tour from August to October. So yes, you understood her forgetting about you, but at one point this had to stop.

This was hurting you as well, more than she would know.

It was your three year anniversary and you had this whole evening planned out for her. Maybe this would've been a welcome distraction for her but Alex seemed far too busy for that.

You returned to an empty home, scoffing at yourself for thinking otherwise. She was probably held up somewhere then.

Checking your Instagram you saw a story from said person. You held your breath for a second as a few tears slipped from your tired eyes.

With a shaky finger you tapped her beautiful icon and watched in disbelief as you saw her together with Allie and Kelley working on their merch. She wasn't even in Florida at the moment, she completely forgot all about you and this anniversary.

You decided not to bother her any further and just go to bed for the rest of the night. There was no use in calling or texting her, you were unwanted anyways.

Waking up your eyes opened and locked on the sleeping form of Alex Morgan. For a moment you were completely speechless as this came unexpected.

Your heart bursted with love as she was drooling onto the fabric of her pillow, her hair a wild mess.

Normally you would've touched her by now, gently caressing her cheek or lips, maybe even kissing her awake but you were so afraid that you jumped out of bed, careful to not wake her.

You knew you couldn't face her after yesterday, you wouldn't know how to act or what to say without breaking into tears.

"What am I doing?" You mouthed into the mirror and stared at yourself, eyes filling with tears.

You closed your eyes and leaned against the sink, the feeling of emptiness coming back.

Getting ready for the day you arrived in the kitchen making yourself some coffee and scrambled eggs with a small amount of porridge. Alex would get up soon, it was practice day.

"Morning, baby, I missed you." Arms circled around your waist as you stood at the stove, your body tensing in shock.

"You did?" Your hands were slightly shaking, your throat closing up as if you were getting choked.

Alex' perfume numbed your mind, the warmth of her skin numbed you, her whole presence was intoxicating.

She turned you around and stared at you, her eyes screaming 'don't you dare look away'. You couldn't stand this, it didn't feel right to you, so you quickly duck out of her arms and walked over to the table taking your plates, disappearing into the garden right as she was about to kiss your lips.

Alex stared after you with confusion and shrugged not thinking much of it as she filled herself a cup of coffee.

Arriving at practice in separate cars– you left home earlier than her– you quickly changed in the locker room and walked out onto the field.

Alex arrived shortly after, the both of you normally always drive together but again she didn't think much of it at that point.

"Look who's here, bitch, give me all the juicy details. Did she bang you yesterday?" Ashlyn was smirking as she walked towards you, Ali not far behind.

"I don't really wanna talk about it, Ash." You sighed and walked off. She turned around and looked at Ali who was raising her eyebrows and shrugging her shoulders. "Guess we'll ask Alex then." She said and stared after you.

As practice started you kept your distance from the brunette. You rarely looked at her, only if you had to when passing the ball or yelling for a pass. Otherwise you kept your eyes to the ground, talked to others or hurried away before she could talk to you.

Alex grew more and more confused. Deciding enough was enough she walked over to Ashlyn. "Hey, do you know what's up with Y/N? She's been weird ever since the morning."

"Don't ask us. Too much sex maybe? Her legs work rather fine though." Ash giggled. "Don't mind her. How was the date anyways? She was really excited days ahead." Ali spoke, pushing Ash away from them both.

"Date?" Alex frowns. And then it dawned on her. You acting so weirdly the whole time, drifting away from her, looking at her with a longing look whenever you thought she wasn't paying attention. It all made sense now.

Alex slapped her forehead and groaned. "Oh my god. I'm such an idiot. I screwed up, Ali. I don't know if she'll forgive me." Alex panicked.

"What? What happened? What do you mean?" Ali asked stepping closer to her friend.

"I forgot about the anniversary, I was out of the state yesterday working on merch. I didn't mean to, Ali. Fuck! This wasn't my first time forgetting about her. She said it was fine but never acted like this. I believed her. I was so busy with everything going on, I didn't mean to. What do I do now?"

She looked over to you running away from Ash who was trying to snatch the ball from your feet.

"I think you know exactly what to do. You're Alex Morgan. Apologize and make it up to your lady! She loves you." Ali said.

Practice went by smoothly for you, Ash and Ali taking you out to the city afterwards, it was much needed.

Walking up to your front door hours later your mood crashed once again, the house was dark therefore Alex was not home yet.

"Here we go again." You mumbled as you opened the door.

Your eyes widened seeing dozens of rose petals laying on the floor building a trail towards the living room where small candles illuminated the room.

You dropped your bag at the door and followed the petals until you reached the living room, your mouth wide open in amazement, your heart beating a mile.

Alex was standing in front of the huge dining table dressed in a gorgeous red dress, hair and makeup done, whereas you looked like a mess with your boring street clothes. The beauty of this woman was unmatched.

"Alex I–" You were speechless. "Please don't say anything. Let's sit and listen to me, please." She said and pointed at the chair she pulled out for you.

"Alex, what's all this?" You asked sitting down, watching her walk over to her spot.

There was a delicious looking plate of pasta in front of you, two huge candles lighting up the space as more rose petals decorated the table. You also noticed the fire burning in the background.

Taking a deep breath Alex began talking. "First of all, I'm sorry for screwing up and forgetting our anniversary. It wasn't my intention to let you hang like that. I was out of my mind, all the appointments completely taking over. It's not an excuse, I know that. You were always so patient with me every time I forgot about us. I don't know how I deserve you, honestly. It blows my mind that you're my girlfriend. Nobody could have my back like you do, all the support you gave me whenever I was drowning in work. I'm sorry I couldn't give back to you, I feel absolutely terrible."

"I know you're drowning in work, you just won a damn World Cup. I'll always be with you and support you no matter what but it felt awful yesterday. It was our anniversary for heaven's sake, Alex! How can you forget about that? I can understand all the other dates, it's not that important, I mean I'm not a national player like you, I don't know much about all that pressure and constant visibility with media but this was about us, it should've distracted you. I love you, Alex, so much and I don't want to spend my life without you. I felt like a burden and other times I felt like my anger and sadness wasn't right, like it was unfair. It made me think what if you were falling out of love with me?" You teared up.

Alex hurried over to you and hugged you. "Don't ever say that again, no matter what, you hear me? No matter what, I'll always fucking love you, Y/N. You are the most beautiful, amazing, supportive human I've met. I'd be an idiot to throw that away. I don't know how I could let it get that far, this never happened to me before. I'll make it up to you, baby. I promise."

Her thumbs gently brushed your tears away and kissed your lips.

Your emotions were all over the place. You really were head over heels for this woman, you could've married her on the spot.

"Let's try to enjoy this dinner before I'll take you upstairs into the bath. We can watch some movies afterwards and cuddle like there's no tomorrow. I bought some ice cream as well. I'll make it up to you, babe."

"I'm just glad to have you to myself now. I know you can make it up. I'm excited for what you have in store but please, never let that happen again, this was scary as hell." You finally dug into your pasta having not eaten much since practice.

And Alex did indeed make it up to you, in all the right ways.

#alex morgan imagines #uswnt imagines #alex morgan #uswnt #alex morgan x reader

359 notes · View notes

mickmarstookmyheart · 4 years

Text

I'm on my way (a whump drabble)

Summary: The father of your unborn child, Mick Mars has finally the last concert of the tour and is eager to come home. You spend most of your time at his parents' house but when you are driving home an unexpected thing happens.

Being a wife to a rock star was never easy. Constant tours and albums and hardly any free time during them. But you exactly knew what you will face when you and Mick married. You have known each other since the Theatre of Pain tour when the Crüe went into a bar you actually worked in and you all meet there.

After dating for months you left your workplace and followed the boys on the tour. Then you got pregnant. In your 5th month Mick sent you home and didn't let you continuing the shows with them. He asked his parents to take care of you when he was not at home. Now you had a pretty big belly and was nearly in your 8th month.

"Eat more, honey, you look skinny." Tina, Mick's mother was really nice and helpful, and was your mother instead of the real one. She cooked for you and gave you several pieces of advice about raising a child. She told you many interesting and funny stories about little Mick and about her sister, Susie, she even showed you pictures.

"No, thank you. I have already eaten instead of two and I don't want to eat up your food." You leant back on the chair and rubbed your stomach with your hands sighing. Your little warrior was quite a wild one, he constantly let you know that he is such eager to come like his father did.

"Yo, Mick are you ready?" Vince yelled after knocking on the door. The guitarist was sitting in the changing room and waited for the concert to start. However he still had to call you before the show since he promised it. He went as quickly as his back let him to a phone booth and dialed his parents' home number. After a couple of minutes you picked it up.

"Hello, (Y/N)!"

"Hi Mick!" You mumbled in the phone since food coma hit you.

"Are you okay?" He asked worryingly immediately after he heard your voice.

"Of course. I'm okay. We are okay." You smiled and looked down on your belly. You felt your son kick and giggled. "Yes, it's daddy. It's your Dad speaking." You murmured.

"How is my little warrior?" He was smiling from ear-to-ear just hearing your voice, though he would be happier if he could see you. Finally it was the last concert of the tour and he was eager to arrive home sweet home to meet his beloved and his son.

"He is quite active lately. I'm pretty sure he will be a boxer or something. Or..." You were grinning from the thought.

"Or what?"

"A musician! Whenever I'm listening to music this little guy starts to dance like Michael Jackson." Mick sighed thinking maybe it's not the best idea for his son to follow his father's steps. One musician is more than enough in one family.

"We will see. Anyway Vince and the boys are sending hellos and big hugs for you. They say we will celebrate the birth of our son like no else has done before. I'm kinda scared if you ask me." He rubbed the back of head while playing several scenarios in his head how bad the party could be.

"Don't worry, I won't let them do any harmful things and I'm sure they will be the best uncles. They will love this boy to the moon and back."

"I hope so. Now I have to go but tomorrow we are heading back so we will soon see each other. I love you (Y/N)."

"We love you, too." You hung up the phone and headed to the couch to rest a bit before going back to your home to prepare everything for Mick's arrival. As you sat down you looked out of the window and saw that it was already darkening.

"Are you sure you don't want to stay and sleep here?" Tina asked trying pursuade you not to drive home in the dark.

"Yeah, I'm sure. I want everything to be nice and ready when Mick arrives." You stated and started to pack your stuff.

"If you insist. Then I will pack you some food and ask Frank to bring it to your car." You placed a small kiss on her cheek, thanking her all the things she has already done for you. After saying goodbyes to Tina and Frank you got in the car and fasten your seatbelts and adjusted it not to bother your huge belly. You turn on the radio and set off from the driveway. It was pitch out there but luckily there wasn't so much car on the road. You hummed along the song which was played and drummed on the wheel to the beat. Your eyes widened when you saw that a car was in your lines from the opposite direction. You honked but you exactly knew it won't help at all. You tried to turn the wheel away as fast as possible but other car hit yours hard. You heard the screeching of the tires and then a big bang. Your head was pounding and you lost your consciousness immediately.

"It was hell of a concert, man!" Nikki yelled as they walked down stage. His terror twin agreed as he patted Nikki's back.

"It was pretty wild, dude! Vinnie, what are you doing after this?" Vince turned around started walking backwards to be face-to-face to the drummer. He was grinning like a mad man and was laughing.

"Oh man. Didn't you see how many chicks wanted to get me?" He asked snickering. Mick just rolled his eyes and hoped his band mates won't do anything that could ruin their way back home.

"You got me there, dude." Tommy said while pointing at the singer. "And you Mick?"

"Being away from you." He muttered and tried not run away from these idiots.

"You already hyped up to see (Y/N) right?" Nikki asked while opening a bottle of Jack Daniel's when they arrived in the changing room. Mick nodded and sat down hissing from the pain his back was giving him.

"Oh man, I miss (Y/N) so much. I haven't annoy her in 4 months." Vince pouted.

"We will have the biggest party when (Y/N) and little dude comes home." Tommy cheered before Doc stormed in the room and was gasping for air. The boys looked at him questioning when he walked over to Mick.

"What is it, Doc? He asked their manager.

"You have to come to the TV. NOW!" They got up fast and followed Doc in the hallway. Many people were already there staring at the screen.

"Car crash on the motorway. We barely know anything about the condition of the drivers, the only thing we know that in the car which was driving in the wrong lane was completely wrecked and the passengers are wounded seriously. In the other car there was..." Mick heart skipped the beat when he recognized (Y/N)'s jet black car in the middle of the road. "We just got the news that the victim is the wife of the famous guitar player Mick Mars. She was critically injured but that's all we know right know. I will report the news as soon as we know something."

Mick quickly left the room and headed towards to the plane when Vince came running behind him.

"Mick wait!" He panted trying to catch his breath. Nikki and Tommy arrived soon and was walking next to the determined and shocked guitarist. "Mick stop! Listen here..."

"You don't have to come if don't want to. It's about my family so it's none of your business." Mick continued his way down the hall.

"What, no way man! We are coming with ya. Mötley Crüe is a family and we are stuck together no matter what." Nikki said and grabbed Mick's shoulder who sighed and smiled.

"Then come on let's go."

Even with the plane it was still two damn hours to get back to the city. Mick couldn't stop thinking about his wife and little boy. "I'm on my way, baby, just hold on." He whispered to himself looking out of the window. He constantly stomped his feet and was biting his lips worryingly. He couldn't eat a thing since the news and he wasn't even hungry. The boys were looking at him with sadness in their eyes, too. They loved (Y/N) more than anything and would give everything to save her.

After getting to the hospital Mick recognized his parents in the corridor. They got up in the moment they saw their son.

"Oh Robert, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have let go alone. It's my fault." Mick sighed and hugged his mother strongly and was rubbing her back.

"Shh mom. It's not your fault at all. It was an accident. Believe me it wasn't you, okay?" He draw back and looked in her eyes making sure she didn't blame herself. His dad also hugged him and smiled sadly down at his frightened son. "Do we know anything about her?"

"No, they haven't told us anything. They told us to wait here, but it was like ages." Tina sat back and was playing with her scarf in her hand. Mick told his bandmates to go home, he will call them if he knows anything so they could come to visit you.

They were sitting in the hall for minutes when a nurse approached them.

"Mr Mars?" She asked not looking up the papers she was reading.

"Yes. How is she?"

"She was unconscious when she was brought in and she has many broken bones but apart from that she is lucky."

"And how is our son?" Mick was worried sick since the nurse haven't said a word about him.

"Well, since your wife was in the 8th month we thought it would be the best idea to operate your son from her. The surgery went well and they are both recovering now. Your son alive and he is healthy although he is in an incubator and you can only see him behind a window." Mick let out a long breath which he wasn't aware he was holding. He never felt so relieved before. His parents were also glad and followed the nurse to their newly born grandson.

"There he is in the middle." The nurse pointed on the bed and walked away after telling where was your room.

"Oh, Robert he is such a beautiful boy." Tina was trying to adore him through her now wet eyes.

"He got your eyes, son." Frank added as he glanced at Mick who couldn't took his eyes off his son. He felt he was luckiest guy on the Earth and couldn't believe that he is married to such a talented and perfect lady like you. After he was managed to think other than his son he told his parents to stay there until he is visiting you. He hesitated first before exiting the dark room but he silently stepped in and closed the door behind himself. He sat down a took a look at you. Your brown hair was still covered in blood just as your beautiful face. Mick leant closer and took your hand is his and placed a soft kiss on it.

"I will never let you go, (Y/N). Did you hear me? You won't get rid of me this easily." He promised to himself.

Two weeks later

"I can't believe I can finally sleep in my own bed now." You said while getting out of the car. You cautiously stretched your back before getting your son from the car. Mick stood next to you and waved you away.

"I will bring him in, babe." He said after kissing you on the lips.

"Thank you." You picked up your staff and opened the big door. When you stepped in you almost had a heart attack. All the boys and many people jumped in front of you cheering. Somebody switched the lights on and you can see the all the decoration and presents in the room.

"Guys, how..how?" You were looking for the right words from the shock, joy and happiness, you couldn't really decide.

"We told you we will throw the biggest party when you come home." Tommy yelled before giving you a big hug. You hissed from the pain but you didn't care anymore. You were with your family and that was the only thing that mattered.

∆

tags: @cmft-jr-winchester @leatherandheels

This idea came up last night and I didn't want to insert in my other story so here it is.

#motley crue #80s music #80srock #nikki sixx #rocknroll #vince neil #glam rock #mickmars #tommy lee #mick mars #robertalandeal #mick mars imagine #mick mars x reader #motley crue x reader #motley crue imagine #whump

50 notes · View notes

be-ready-when-i-say-go · 4 years

Note

Tongue tied and Luke!!!

Thanks for the suggestion! (This is tongue tied by grouplove for anyone else interested!)

Please considering donating to my Ko-fi. I’m saving up for graduate school. Also please reblog if you enjoy. It helps me out by getting others to see my work and increasing the eyes on my donation page.

____________________________________________

Youth

Luke just wanted to feel like a kid again. There was something about the wilds of being a teenager that was striking his core again. This urge hadn’t hit him in a long time. Between writing music, touring, and making sure he kept his head on straight, he didn’t worry too much about what it meant to be young. Besides, he had spent his wilds already. He made dumb choices and broken some hearts, got his heart broken in return too. He was ready to be a better man. He was still young, he knew. But there were bigger pictures and smoother roads to take now.

And maybe it was the voicemail he had just gotten. Maybe he wanted to forget the way she sighed into the receiver. Maybe he just wanted not to go home to another argument. They were going good. That’s the thing--they had their highs and their bumps. But lately, it just seemed like Luke couldn’t do anything right. It seemed like he was always in the wrong. Tonight, he just wanted a little fun. He wanted to forget responsibilities for 0.2 seconds.

Who wants to go out? It’s a simple text to the group chat. He stares at it, still in the parking lot of the pharmacy. He stopped, at his girl’s insistence, to grab a few things for her. Things he was supposed to get yesterday, according to the voicemail she left him.

You do realize it’s a Wednesday. Calum replies sits for just a moment and Luke shuts his eyes. He realizes the day of the week. That’s not what he asked. His phone buzzes again. But sure, I’m game.

Luke exhales. Usual time and place?

I’ll be there. Ashton replies and Luke reclines his head into the headrest, thank fuck. Now he just had to get home and survive a couple more hours. They started going out earlier in the evenings so that they could all sleep and get up in the morning without hating themselves.

When Luke steps inside the house, it’s quiet. Too quiet, so Luke drops the bag of the stuff his girl asked for onto the kitchen table. Next to it, is a note. Went over to a friend’s house. I’ll be back tonight. Love you. Luke takes the moment to scrawl his own note underneath it. Warning of his own plans and runs back. God, his own house feels like a cage right now. Inside those four main walls are terse silences and the swelling of words they haven’t yet said. It was driving him mad. He sure it was driving her mad too. He felt a little bad but for the moment, for now he was going to escape. He was going sweat his hair out and come back more shambly that he should and it didn’t fucking matter.

He grabs dinner at his favorite spot around the corner. His phone shakes the table as he sits and looks out the window. Come by my place first. We can carpool from there. I’ll DD. It’s Ashton in the group chat. Luke slurps down the last few forkfuls of his noddles and just barely remembers to grab his coat off the back of the chair.

The music rattles Luke’s teeth but he welcomes it. He takes just a moment to close his eyes and inhale the scent of weed, sweat, and stale alcohol. It’s not the most appealing combination but it feels welcomed in his lungs. No one orders a round but Luke is bold and gets a shot out of the gate.

“You trying to drown something down?” Michael jokes, watching Luke knock the clear tequila down without a cough.

“Just want to be free for a couple of hours.”

“Just take it slow. Just take it slow,” Michael warns getting a glass of water and handing it over to Luke too.

The leather jacket traps some heat and with the first shot and a heavy pour in his mix drink Luke can feel the first few drips of sweat running down his back. He pulls the heavy coat off and tosses it onto the seat of the booth. Even though it’s the middle of the week, it’s enough of a crowd to make the dancefloor look like a sea. He’s not normally a dancer. He’s terrible at it and with all his long limbs feels too awkward to try anything.

But tonight, it’s about being young. So fuck it, he thinks, and slides onto the dancefloor, attempting to fit in but being so far off beat that the rest of the guys have to laugh. Luke doesn’t care, not as he takes another long sip of his drink and lets the warmth encase his chest and the fuzz swallow up his brain.

“What are you doing here?”

It’s a softer voice shouting over the music and Luke looks to his left. She’s here too. Her eyes are a little glassy but she’s got an easy grin on her face. “Just out,” Luke replies.

“You’re a terrible dancer.”

“I’ve been told a time or two.”

She laughs, slipping her arm around his waist and falling into the terrible rhythm that Luke’s established. His free arm slips down, his palm resting right on the crest of her ass. She laughs again when they stumble and Luke doesn’t even fucking care that they’re probably an eyesore.

Whatever happened to them in the first place? What the hell put them down this uptight spiral anyway? Was Luke spending too much time in the studio? He was pretty good about being home at a reasonable time to eat dinner and just hang out with her. Whatever the reason, maybe they were on the up and up. No thanks to tequila and probably some vodka for her.

“I’m cooking dinner tomorrow,” Luke says into her ear as they sway to the beat in time now. Thanks to her lead of course.

She gives another laughter, with a bite of a snort. “You can’t cook to save your life.”

“You take that back. I can cook.”

“Okay then, hotshot. You cook tomorrow.” She winks at him, lips wrapping around the straw in her drink and turns, ass pressed into his crotch. Luke has to grin and bends over, lips capturing the soft skin of her neck.

Her head falls back into his chest. “That’s not fair,” she breathes. Luke just barely catches it in the thump of the bass.

“I think it is,” he teases, kissing up further, close to her ear.

She turns again, bringing Luke closer by a firm grip to the back of his neck. Their mouths seal up in a kiss, and it’s a mess of vodka and tequila, but it feels so goddamn right at the moment. He melts into her, hands falling down and squeezing her ass through the pants. Her lips have always been so goddamn soft. “I’m sorry,” she whispers against his lips. “I haven’t been great at communicating lately. I just hit a low.”

“You know I’m always here for you, right? Always, baby.”

Luke catches the sad downturn to her eyes and he gently reaches for her glass. He can finally see how bad that low is. Drinking won’t fix it. He knows that and he knows she knows it too. She gives it up without a fuss. “Can I hang out with you for the rest of the night?”

Luke kisses her sweetly. “Of course. Ashton’s driving.”

“Dear Lord.” Ashton’s a fine driver but she won’t let him live down the one time he hit a curb. Luke gives a small squeak of laughter and nods for her to follow. He sets their drinks down, pushing hers closer to the wall, so no one mistakes it for theirs and so she doesn’t go back for it.

“Teach me some dance moves. I’m terrible at it.”

“First,” she says stepping into him. Her arms wind around his waist. Luke waits for more but as she stretches upward he catches the hint and kisses her again. Slightly open-mouthed and exhalations becoming the others inhales. Luke cups her face, feeling just how hot her skin is. She melts into his touch, letting him hold her grounded.

“I love you,” he breathes, lips brushing over hers as he talks.

“I love you.”

-H

#luke hemmings #luke hemmings blurb #luke hemmings fic #luke hemmings fanfic #calum hood #ashton irwin #michael clifford #5sos #5sos blurb #5sos fic #5 seconds of summer #h writes #song blurb #song rec #asks #answered #luke hemmings fluff #luke hemmings angst

63 notes · View notes

needtherapy · 4 years

Text

A Time And Place For Us (pt 4)

(Since Tumblr is being a jerk about outside links, I’m going to try it this way. It’s also on AO3 if you want to read it there.)

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 (Explicit) / Part 4

It’s Xichen’s birthday, and what a coincidence, the Qinghe Nie sect leader is taking a tour that just happens to take him to Cloud Recesses.

Unsurprisingly, it’s an exciting few days.

In this story you will find: Mingjue breaking things; Sword fighting; Xichen’s issues; Mingjue’s birth name; Embarrassed younger brothers; Monsters; Birthday presents; Kissing…and more.

A follow-up to Mingjue Falls and Xichen Remembers.

Chapter 9: Xichen

Xichen did not sleep, even after he went back to his own rooms and cleaned himself with shaky hands. He could still smell Mingjue on his skin, could not stop remembering the sound of Mingjue’s hoarse voice calling his name and the unbelievably intoxicating feeling of being so deeply joined together. Xichen knew he could not let himself want more, but he wished he could have at least stayed until morning. Not for the first time he resented this life he had been born to with no choices given and no deviations allowed.

He still had not gotten out of bed by the time dawn lit his room, a small rebellion that ended up making no difference. There was a gentle knock on his door he could not ignore. When he opened it, one of the servants was fidgeting nervously on the other side.

“Zewu-Jun, the Nie zongzhu…” the servant trailed off, brow furrowed. “The Nie zongzhu requires someone to braid his hair and we have not been able to find anyone he deems acceptable.” Xichen’s lips twitched. He was going to have to chastise Mingjue for flustering the servants.

“Thank you, I will see if I can determine what he would find acceptable.”

At the steps of the guest house, Xichen met the servant delivering breakfast and tea and took the tray from her. He dismissed the rest of the hovering servants, who looked very relieved, and Xichen wondered what Mingjue had done to alarm them.

Mingjue didn’t look particularly intimidating, although Xichen supposed he might be biased. He was merely sitting in the middle of the floor with a frown on his face and Baxia laid across his lap. But with his hair unbraided and wearing only pants and a single robe, he did look a little feral.

Xichen closed the door behind him and set the breakfast tray on the table.

“I was told the Nie zongzhu needed assistance. Can I help you?” he asked mildly.

Mingjue gave him a sheepish grin.

“Xichen, I swear, I didn’t try to scare them, but the first one came in while I was meditating and Baxia was...not pleased. She was hoping to see you as I was hoping to see you.”

Xichen moved to sit on a low stool behind him, picking up a comb and starting to brush out the tangles. Mingjue’s exhale sounded like a tiger’s purr, and Xichen’s hand twitched. He scolded himself for being so infatuated he couldn’t even manage this minor task without throwing himself at Mingjue.

His hands moved swiftly and deftly, parting the hair and twisting the thick plaits at the top of Mingjue’s head. He was finally engrossed in shaping the smaller braids when Mingjue interrupted him.

“I want this.”

Xichen’s hands stilled.

“This?” he asked, afraid to guess what Mingjue meant.

With a patient sigh, Mingjue turned to pull Xichen onto his lap.

“This. You. Having breakfast with me. Braiding my hair. Being with me.”

Xichen’s blood was pounding so hard it hurt. To be confronted so baldly with this thing he could not even let himself consider wanting left a raw wound across his heart.

“You know that isn’t possible,” he said a sharper tone than he meant.

“Ah, Xichen, I’m saying this badly.” Mingjue frowned and touched Xichen’s cheek. “I know there are expectations about the future, for me and for you. I will eventually fulfill my obligations to my sect. But I want there to be something for us, too. I don’t want to hide that you are a part of my life. That you are vital to my happiness.” Xichen softened and leaned against Mingjue.

“Shi-ge, there is nothing I can promise you.” “I could swear brotherhood to you, and you to me,” Mingjue said, in such a casual voice, Xichen knew how much the answer must mean.

He turned to take Mingjue’s face in his hands, pressing their lips tightly together, not caring if anyone came in. After yesterday, there were probably a few people who wouldn’t be surprised to find their future sect leader sitting in the lap of the Nie zongzhu kissing him as though it was his dying wish.

“Beloved, if my life was my own to give, I would give it to you gladly,” Xichen said gently, unable to resist laying his fingers on the bare skin of Mingjue’s neck. “If my future was my own to hold, I would hand it to you. If I could, I would promise anything you asked me.”

When the words came out, Xichen was afraid they sounded like rejection, but to his surprise, Mingjue smiled, the wide, dimpled smile that was Xichen’s favorite.

“Someday you will be able to, and I will ask you again.” He kissed Xichen. “Or you won’t be able to live without me and you will ask. Either way, knowing it is what you want is enough right now.”

He tugged the trailing ends of Xichen’s forehead ribbon.

“Will you finish my hair? I have three more days with you, and I hope there are many dark and hidden places in Cloud Recesses you have not yet shown me.”

But Xichen wasn’t quite ready to go back to being Zewu-Jun. He slipped his hand inside Mingjue’s robe and nuzzled the hollow of his neck.

“I could ward the doors now and braid your hair later,” he offered.

With a whoop of laughter, Mingjue pulled Xichen to the ground with him, barely giving him enough time to set the talismans that would keep the rest of Cloud Recesses from hearing exactly what he wanted for his future, even if he could not have it.

Chapter 10: Mingjue

Mingjue had only been back in Bujing Shi for a week before the letter came. He closed his eyes in sorrow after he read it. They were going back to Cloud Recesses. There was a new zongzhu.

Mingjue only took three other men and they traveled faster by sword flight. It was dusk by the time they arrived. Although it was after the usual last-entry time, Mingjue did not bother to be acknowledged by the guards, letting his jade entry token part the wards.

He was surprised that Lan-er-gongzi was the one who met him on the path. The boy bowed and beckoned for Mingjue to follow him. It made Mingjue smile to see that he tucked his arm behind his back the way Xichen did.

He wasn’t sure if he would get an answer, but he asked anyway.

“Are you well?”

Lan-er-gongzi turned to regard him. He nodded once.

“Yes.”

Mingjue tried to decipher his expression but it was too complicated for a single word. Relief? Sadness? Regret? He would have to be satisfied with yes.

“Lan Wangji, thank you.”

Mingjue wasn’t sure what he was thanking the boy for, but he knew it was necessary. This time, he recognized the softening of expression as acceptance.

To his surprise, Lan Wangji took him to a small house far from the others, set behind a walled garden. The leaves were falling from the trees, and a path of gold led to the door.

Mingjue could hear Lan-xiansheng’s voice from inside.

“You will have to move there eventually. What difference does it make if it is today or tomorrow?”

Xichen’s tone was clipped.

“Shufu, it makes a difference to me.”

Lan Wangji had stopped, so Mingjue had stopped, and Lan-xiansheng nearly ran them over when he burst out of the house, an exasperated expression on his face. He stopped and blinked in confusion at the two of them for a moment.

“Chifeng-Zun, maybe you can convince him.”

It was Mingjue’s turn to be confused. He glanced at Lan Wangji who just flicked up one of his eyebrows before moving to walk away with his uncle. Mingjue had never been so grateful to be dismissed.

Mingjue hadn’t been sure exactly what to expect, but he found Xichen sitting at a table writing, the strokes quick and confident. Xichen looked up and smiled at him.

“Shi-ge, I was not expecting you so soon.”

To Mingjue’s shock, Xichen stood and kissed him intently, slipping his tongue between Mingjue’s lips and threading his fingers through his hair. Mingjue didn’t resist, but he was puzzled.

“This is apparently to be my last night in my home,” Xichen told him, a tight set to his lips. “Will you stay with me?”

He stayed. There was never any question.

He stayed and let Xichen demand pain and pleasure and love.

He stayed and did not regret a moment of it.

“I am sorry about your father. Are you upset?” he ventured when he could think again, and Xichen shook his head.

“No. I am not.” He laughed lightly, dancing his fingers across Mingjue’s chest. “Is that terrible? I am not upset that my father is dead.”

Mingjue considered the words and the bitter tone of voice. He wondered which of them Xichen was trying to convince. He changed the subject.

“Your brother said he was well?”

“Wangji is not even pretending that he is not relieved.” Xichen chuckled, and this time it sounded genuine. “And I can not blame him. Maybe it will give him a chance to...be someone different. He has hidden himself away from Qingheng-Jun for so long, I think he has forgotten that he does not have to hide from everyone.”

Xichen leaned up on one elbow, brimming with sudden excitement.

“I am planning a Gusu Lan sect lecture session for next summer. I plan to invite the Lanling Jin and Yunmeng Jiang disciples who are Wangji’s age. And Huaisang, of course.”

Mingjue rolled his eyes.

“You want Huaisang to come to Cloud Recesses to learn something? You are ambitious.”

He remembered the wild and noisy Jiang boys he had met and thought Lan Wangji might at least get along with the Jin heir.

Without warning, Xichen melted into tears. He covered his face and turned away from Mingjue, sobs shaking his body. Mingjue was so startled, he didn’t know how to react. When he reached out to touch Xichen’s shoulder, he flinched, so Mingjue withdrew his hand and waited.

“I am not sorry he is dead and I should be.” Xichen’s voice was muffled, but he sounded belligerent rather than sad. “He was my father. I should have loved him. He should have loved us. But all he could see was the ways in which we disappointed him.”

Mingjue stroked Xichen’s hair gently, and this time, Xichen did not pull away. There was nothing he could say.

“I am so angry with him for the way…” Xichen sat up abruptly, curving forward to protect his pain. “He should have thought about what it would mean to find him.”

Mingjue’s breath caught in his throat and he sat up too. He had wondered.

“Xichen, did you…”

Xichen shook his head.

“No, shufu did. He tried to keep it from me but…” He shrugged. “Qingfeng-Jun chose to leave us a long time ago. I was not surprised.”

He leaned back against Mingjue, the tears subsiding, and Mingjue held him tightly, not knowing what else to do.

“I did love him,” Xichen whispered. “And still I am not sorry he is gone. I do not have to live my life by his judgment anymore.”

He curled inside the ring of Mingjue’s arms and sighed with the last shudder of grief.

He was too fragile right now, Mingjue realized, and so he held his tongue. He did not say, whatever your father believed, your kindness is not a fault. He did not say, come with me and let me protect you. He did not say, I will love you until I die.

Someday he would tell him. When Xichen was ready. Someday he would ask him to share his life again. When they had more time.

Someday.

#the untamed #cql #mdzs #nielan #lan xichen #nie mingjue #lan wangji #this one is sad #you've been warned #kristina writes tiny stories #in pieces #mo dao zu shi #chen qing ling #implied suicide

13 notes · View notes

ateeztories · 4 years

Text

If I Need You I’ll See You In My Dreams. (FULL: so far) word count: 11k+

Angst, Fluff, “Coming of age”

Very Easy Read.

Seonghwa, Wooyoung, y/n imagine.

*AU where Wooyoung never followed Yeosang to KQ. That, however, does not mean they are any lesser friends with each other.*

To anyone who’s reading this, I just wanted to say that this is the first time I’m writing anything creative or anything at all so feel free to give any feedback/criticism. I would certainly appreciate it. Thank you~ so long peeps.

Song recommendation: End by Jeremy Zucker

While reading i’d recommend listening to “Friend A” from Shgatsu Wa Kimi No Uso (Your Lie In April) maybe on a loop O_o

Pilot: Dreams

Seonghwa… You wanted to see him, one last time.

That day, you kissed your boyfriend Wooyoung goodbye at the airport and left him behind in Korea. He kissed you back.

He loved you, and you loved him. Wooyoung, he was the sweetest and the kindest person. He was your person.

He has work to worry about. You were going to miss him so much. Miss his bear hugs and all the other kinds, but you weren’t sad that he wasn’t coming. Only because you had your beloved friend Ji Yeon coming along. She had been with you through your middle school, high school and even ended up going to the same college. She was there for you through thick and thin. You and Ji Yeon were actually, best friends forever. The kind you read in stories and it astounded both of you.

It has been a week since you landed in Canada, there were things to see and to wonder about. You didn’t like to go to crowded places. You just wanted to enjoy the virtue of things that were unappreciated by the people. Go to places no one has ever been to.

That was something you both had in common.

It was Ji Yeon that “introduced” you to the group Ateez. She knew what it meant to you, but she was stubborn and did it anyway. Still, that was ages ago. College was taking over all your time and energy.

This was the break you needed.

You had long forgotten about them. You forgot about him.

...

“Can you believe this??” Ji Yeon Screamed while plopping down on the bed.

“this is the weirdest coincidence ever”

“We should go see it!!!!”

“The concert is in THREE days!!”

All the suppressed memories rolling inside of your mind; all the while Ji Yeon’s voice turns in to mumbled white noises.

“let’s go then,”

you said, trying to sound as casual as possible.

As if you didn’t feel a thing.

Seonghwa… You wanted to see him... From afar. For the last time.

For the last time and never again.

Part 2: Wanna Go Back

“I said I’ll go,”

you said without a drop of emotion displaying on your face. Unlike your heart and mind that was going bat-shit crazy right then.

“Awesome!! I just booked two tickets” Ji Yeon replied. Trying not to sound more suspicious than she already appears to be. You didn’t bother to question her intentions because that was simply none of your concerns at the moment.

Plus she would never do anything to hurt you. Ever.

━━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━━

It has already been three days since Ji Yeon asked about the concert. You have been trying to contact Wooyoung. Even though, because of of the time difference and his work schedule, it never worked out. The calls were full of Hello’s and farewells. You missed him more than anything.

But now it was just another one of your ever-growing worries.

...

It’s today,

The thought of seeing his face in person never left your mind. It makes your heart feel some sort of way.

The way it feels to walk into a flaming pit of fire.

The way you feel at the drop of a roller coaster.

The way you feel when you see the person you once loved so dearly.

These thoughts made you feel guilty. It made you feel like a bad person.

“If Wooyoung knew what was going through my mind right now, what would he think of me?”

There was nothing you could do besides getting past those thoughts.

You felt all sorts of emotions as you walked into the concert hall.

“What are the chances that Ateez goes on tour here, at the same time we come to Canada??” Ji Yeon said.

“Ya… no shit”

Noticeably, you weren’t feeling it. you just wanted to get over it. You needed closure, and a part of you hated that feeling. Ji Yeon was no stranger to your mood swings. She caught on quite fast. Faster than you thought. Three days faster.

Somehow she knew what she was doing. Except, she didn’t know the whole story.

You walked through big brown doors into a seemingly small venue. You saw fan-girls falling into line behind the barricade like a bunch of tiny colonized ants. They bumped into your shoulder, passing you by as you walked among them, step by step. You looked around scanning the venue, while clinging to Ji Yeon.

“Maybe we should just go back,” you said with the least bit of persuasion.

“Are you kidding me? those tickets were NOT free” Ji Yeon said with a face that only you could decipher.

You knew there was going back.

The venue became full, there was no chance for him to see your face. Even if he did, there was no way he would recognize you. It’s been too long since he last saw you.

Eventually and gradually, the stage became brighter as the audience became darker. This assured you, he wasn’t seeing you today.

Ateez members entered the stage one after another.

You saw his silhouette.

His tall figure that was impossible to forget. You saw his face, he looked different. Different from the face that was buried in your memories.

The music began to play and the performance started. The crowd went wild while you stared blindly onto the stage… standing still, wondering what you went there to do that day. You questioned your intentions in the midst of being unable to look away from his direction.

You eyes flickering at the thought of getting closure

“What closure?”

“How is this closure?”

You thought, staring at his face full of demeanor.

You felt your phone vibrate in your pocket. you took it out slowly looking down, though your eyes could not leave the stage. You wearily look at your phone.

“Wooyoung!!!”

Your face lit up, eyes shimmered. This was the first time you were able to reach him in three days. You unintentionally jumped up and down in excitement.

You forgot all your worries and unwanted feelings.

You signaled Ji Yeon and she was telling you to get out and take the call.

The song, Utopia, was coming to an end. The members stood on the stage when Jongho approached them while singing the last verse. It was a beautiful piece of art deserving of endless admiration.

Fan chants were echoing throughout the entire room: “Kim Hongjoong! Park Seonghwa! Jeong Yunho! Kang Yeosang! Choi San! Song Mingi! Choi Jongho! Lee Junyeong!!!”

As you were moving across the crowd making your way out, you looked at the stage for the last time. There he was… looking like the same old person that you knew. Head tilted up and with his eyes closed. His black hair wet with sweat that dripped down his chin and onto his shirt.

Still, you hated him for what he did.

You have Wooyoung now.

He is waiting for you to answer. He is waiting for you. You looked away and pushed your way out through the crowd. Went out of the nearest door which led you outside. It was dark, the street lights flickered and they were stable at the same time.

Not one single soul to be seen.

The door closed behind you as you answered the phone in a haste. “Wooyoung I miss-”

“Let’s break up”

…

Frozen.

Unable to take another step.

How to react?

“Woo- Wooyoung?”

your voice, weak, surprised and baffled in disbelief.

You can still hear noises from the inside. muffled screaming of the fans.

The music has ended.

There was silence and everything else.

“How to turn back time?”

Where did it all go wrong?“

"Why?”

Part 3: Your Lie

"Wooyoung I miss-“

"Let’s break up”

…

Frozen.

People say your body freezes when you don’t know what to do.

“Should I fight this?” …

“Should I just run away?”

When he said those words… You just froze.

Unable to take another step

“How do I react?” You think.

Think, and there is nothing.

Your mind is empty, exhausted and deluded.

Legs giving out, your body crumbles onto the ground as you sit on the pavement of the building, your knees nearly touching your chest.

Your mind completely disregards the sound of the door behind, opening and closing.

You finally find the strength to say the words lingering at the tip of your tongue.

“What do you mean you want to break up?”

“Why?”

“Why now?”

“Just tell me what is going on, we can figure this out together.”

Silence… Stillness.

You can hear Wooyoung’s breath. You can hear his longing sighs. His voice stutterers to break this ominous silence.

You could finally hear his voice loud and clear.

“I think you already know y/n.” His voice almost sounds drunk.

“There is nothing to figure out.” Has he been crying?

“I don’t know what you are talking about.” You respond.

“Wooyoung please…”

“Please… can you just wait until I reach Korea”

“I’m going to book the first flight tomorrow”

“Just hold on one more day”

“Please,” You sounded hopeless and desperate.

The silence of the surrounding creates goosebumps all over your exposed skin. The cold freezing winds making you sink into your own body. You are sniffing, your breath is shivering, and it is not because of the freezing winds. In the verge of tears, a lump in your throat. Your heart is beating so fast to the point you almost want to throw up at the thought of being without him.

You could hear footsteps behind you. You could see in the corner of your eyes, a tall shadow of a person. At this moment, you don’t care. Nothing matters as the only beautiful thing in your life slips away from your fingertips.

The tall figure gently walked to the side of you and stopped at the edge of the pavement. You didn’t look up at his face. You thought it was just a person coming out to get a breath of “fresh” air, a break from the chaos that is inside. Air that has now been polluted by the thoughts in your mind. He sat down beside you in a peaceful manner. Oddly enough, you weren’t scared of the stranger sitting beside you. All you could think about was Wooyoung.

Though it felt familiar.

You were now curious, this stranger that carries a homely scent, an intimate familiarity. You lookup slowly… Upon his direction… All the while holding Wooyoung on the other side of the phone… You look.

He was looking at the distant empty roads across the parking lot. Your eyes grew wider.

It’s Seonghwa… Park Seonghwa!

At that instant, Wooyoung’s voice echoed through and out of the space enclosing you.

“Fine! I cheated on you!”

You heard Wooyoung’s reckless voice breaking the silence, as you stared into Seonghwa’s eyes.

You can’t believe your ears. Your heart is beating so fast. To the point, you almost want to throw up at the thought of him being with someone else. All the moments you both shared, gone in a fleeting minute. All the feelings of love and devotion suppressed deep inside your mind.

You can’t believe your eyes. The person that sits beside you at this moment. The person you missed for the longest time, and the person you hated the most. Now knows your most vulnerable secret.

You are looking at his face, but you’re not looking at him. Your mind wanders to places no one wants to be in.

“I cheated on you. Is that what you want to hear?”

You are still looking up at Seonghwa’s direction. There is no doubt he can hear Wooyoung’s voice coming through the phone in this heart wrenching silence.

“This is it,” you thought. You were never gonna see Wooyoung again. He dares to break up with you over a phone call. End it all, after being together for two years.

Alone, you still loved him. All the feelings were suppressed. Yet they were still there.

All of this is happening so fucking fast. But, It felt like forever.

You still couldn’t say a word to Wooyoung.

Words are coming out of your mouth but your voice doesn’t make any sound. Your heart is shattered into dust. The street lights are flickering and glistering in your teary eyes.

Wooyoung continues, sounding spiteful than he’s ever been.

“Did you really think you were the only person I was with? Oh y/n you are too naive”

“This is not him,” You thought, while saying nothing and nothing at all. You continued to listen to him, step on what’s left of your heart.

“y/n, Did you honestly think I love-”

Seonghwa grasped the phone out of your hand and hung up. He latched on to the phone while keeping his head down.

Not once, ever since he sat down beside you, did he look at your face.

You looked at him. Then you gazed up into the distance.

There was silence yet again.

The deafening silence.

The silence that you loathed more than anything.

Part 4: The Story

“Wooyoung.”

Saying his name, just thinking about it, makes your heart, break into a million little pieces. You wanted to cry, cry your eyes out and throw up all the feelings that were bottled inside.

“y/n” Seonghwa muttered as he extended his arms to hold on while turning your way. To hold on to you… to comfort you.

“Don’t…” you said. Keeping a straight face. While taking a deep breath, in an attempt to keep your composure. Because you can’t cry. Not in front of him. You don’t need his pity. And he doesn’t deserve to feel bad for you. It puzzled you, how difficult it was to not cry out loud. Scream at the top of your lungs. Yet he does not get to see you cry. After all, he left you. left you to wonder where he vanished to, without a word. Without even saying goodbye, he disappeared.

“Don’t touch me,” you said. Calm, but stern. You’re not a high schooler anymore. You’re not young anymore. You’re not his friend anymore.

Nothing less and nothing more.

You gaze up at the distance roads, turning your face away from Seonghwa’s direction. There is a horizon between the field across the road and the night sky full of stars. It’s a magical view for a night like this. A night that carries a sob story for people to read about.

You look at Seonghwa with eyes that hold a thousand, million words. His soft black hair is reflecting against the moonlight. It is blowing across his face as the wind sweeps the tension among you. The tension that holds a history belonging to you and only him. His hair… it had so much character. Once again, he looks like the person you know.

…

He had blonde hair when you first saw him on TV for the first time. It was peachy and unfamiliar. It carried a cold persona. You couldn’t recognize him at a glance. When you finally understood, you stared at his face for hours on end.

“So that’s where he ran off to…” you remember thinking. You remember going through a roller coaster of emotions all alone.

…

Flashbacks rushing back into your mind like an old movie reeling, roll after roll, scene after scene. Each moment you spend together; good, bad, exhilarating and frightening.

You were just friends, but more than that. You weren’t lovers but you loved each other. It was a beautiful time to be alive.

How hard it was for you; he may never know. But there was someone… not Ji Yeon, someone else. And that person was Wooyoung. He was there for you when you cried for so many nights and poured your heart out to him. You never thought of this moment, never thought how painful this moment would be. This moment he chooses to part ways.

“It’s happening all over again.” You said.

Thoughts, speculations, tearing through your mind, “There has to be something going on… he is not the type of person to do this.” All the while knowing that this, won’t change the fact that he broke up with you. He’s leaving you…

He left you.

It’s hard to face reality. Reality is sitting beside you. It is staring at you right in the face.

“It’s not fair,” you spoke under your breath.

You look up at the starry yet gloomy sky and blink the tears away.

“Why is everything going wrong today?” you wonder.

You squeeze your eyes shut tight to stop the tears. Still, they come creeping down your eyelids and stream along your glowing cheeks. One fell, two fell, tears came pouring out of your eyes. You put your guard down. No… your “guard,” was never there. It was denial, spite and history.

With both hands you cover your face and eyes to hide,. Your entire body trembles to the beat of your sobbing. You can feel the muscles in your face shaking. You can taste the salty tears as they fall onto your lips. You hear yourself silently screaming to release the pain you hold inside your throat. Your heart sinks deeper and deeper, each time you let out air. It wasn’t pretty, it wasn’t pleasant. You felt pathetic and miserable.

As the night gets darker and your sobs get louder, you feel the embrace of Seonghwa. You feel his touch for the first time in two years. It’s warm in this cold weather. It brings you comfort and relief. You continued to cry like a little child as he held on to you.

“I’m sorry,” He said.

Guilt, regret, pity, sorrow and all the feelings you can feel. These two words held so much meaning and you can hear every single one of them through his gentle voice.

…………

Seonghwa left, but he was always there. In the back of your mind. From the day he stepped in to that classroom. There was always comfort in his presence. Even the thought of him made you feel warm inside. There was never a guard between the two of you. The walls between you collapsed a long time ago and they were never going to come back up.

“Can I say the same for him?” You ask yourself. Whilst being wrapped up in his arms and feeling hollow inside.

He was your person before anyone else.

Were you his?

Part 5: Friends

Park Seonghwa…He is with you, you feel his warmth, the feeling you craved at this moment. Your face is buried in his chest. Sobbing like a broken machine. A broken soul.

The history behind you two was always complicated, and it will always be, complicated.

━━━━━━༻p a s t༺━━━━━━

You were walking along the narrow sidewalk on the first day of high school. You stopped at an intersection, to wait for Ji Yeon. Waited and waited, you called her cell phone, and no one answered. You walked into the grocery store nearby to wait for her. You jump at everything so the ringing sound as you stepped into the store while opening the door startled you. It was a lovely day outside, but the sunlight was hot. You decided to get some ice cream for you and Ji Yeon. You were leaning, concentrated, picking her and your favourite ice creams.

You heard the ringing once again and It scared the hell out of you. Your head shot up and turned towards the door with eyes wide. He stepped into the store while caressing his messy school boy hair.

There he was… Seonghwa.

That was the first time you saw him. He was wearing the same kind of uniform; you knew he went to your school. He looked… handsome. Not your stereotypical “idol” handsome. Oh, the irony. It made your heart flutter, even though he looked like he could make you squirm with just a glance. His presence made you feel some kind of way. His aura was overwhelmingly attractive. You stared at him for a good minute until he noticed you. Which is when you were taken back to reality with a slap in the face. You looked away so quickly, you felt something snap in your neck. You were a deer in headlights.

You picked up the first two ice creams that caught your hand and went up to the counter hoping to escape this humiliation. While you were waiting for the cashier to scan the items, you felt a strong presence behind you. It was him… standing tall, making you feel all kinds of intimidated. “how did he get there so fast??” you contemplate during this mental chaos.

You paid the cashier at lightning speed and ran towards the exit. You looked back just for the sake of it while opening the doors, only to see him staring at you. He smiled at you. It looked more like he laughed at you but “What do I know,” you thought while making a face that felt like a smile while walking out of the store. If only the muscles in your face moved properly, it wouldn’t have looked like you just ate the world’s most sour lemon.

You walked outside to see Ji Yeong standing at the intersections waiting to cross the street. You sneaked up on her placing both ice creams on her cheeks. Ji young turned around in a flash raising her hand to almost knock you out. “Oh it’s just you” “Why do you sound disappointed? Are you sad you couldn’t knock me out??” Mundane conversations never felt so good at that moment. The big sister you never had. No… The big sister you always had, watching over you. Making sure you always have your life together. And you were the same. Clumsy, but you tried. She was the more mature one.

“Why is your face so red?” Ji Yeong asked tilting her head. While grabbing the ice cream out of your hands. “O? Oh there was-” At that moment, Seonghwa walked out of the store. Ji Yeong’s attention immediately went to him, she looked at you and him again. “She’s too smart for her own good.” you think while looking at her face that is now grinning like a clown

“I- I think he goes to our school,” you said avoiding her eyes “Ohohoho, you think??” Ji Young said still smirking like a damn clown. She looked up at you with squinty eyes with an even wider grin. You knew she was about to do something you’re both going to regret.

Ji Yeon looked at Seonghwa who was walking towards the school. “HEY, YOU!!!” She screamed. Seonghwa looked back afraid for his life.

“HEYYY WHAT ARE YOU DOING???“ You said, silently screaming.

Ji Yeong ran towards him whilst dragging you with her.

How she has the courage to do things like this, you never understood. But you were always grateful for that. But this time you weren't so sure, “Why in the world is she doing this??” you wonder all the while being dragged by the mighty hands of Ji Yeon. Seonghwa still standing, scared for his life by the sight of Ji Yeong running towards him amid pulling you like a suitcase. The way Ji Yeon suddenly stopped running and the moumentum she had built up made you crash onto Seonghwa.

“Sorry,” you said, frowning at Ji Yeon and blushing like no one’s business.

“You okay?” He asked with coughing out a laugh. You heard his voice for the first time. His voice matched so perfectly to his oh so handsome face.

Leaves started falling slowly, winds brushed through the three of you standing on the sidewalk. Autumn has never looked so beautiful.

You remember walking to the school together, he parted ways to walk with his friends at the Entrance. His friends, you became close to them too.

You walked into the classroom that belonged to you for the year. Took a deep breath. ”everything will be fine,“ you more so wished.

Ji Yeon ended up in a different homeroom, unfortunately. Her outgoing self was fine. However, you were scared.

You chose your seat close to the window. A place that made the classroom feel much bigger. Looking outside somehow made you calm. And the sound of birds and wind crashing on the windows made you feel like you were outside.

That’s when he entered the classroom. His eyes scanned the room and stopped at you. He slowly walked towards you.

“Is this seat taken?” He asked… with a smile? You don’t remember.

“No, you can sit here,” You said with a faint curious smile tracking his face as he sat down. There was that feeling again… But this time it was different. It felt normal, a beautiful, typical feeling… It was like he was always there in your comfort.

You two were quiet for a long minute.

“I can’t believe we’re in the same homeroom,” He spoke with that gentle voice again.

This was the beginning of a questionable yet charming, melancholic, and longing friendship that lasted for years… It was normal, doesn’t any friendship start out like this?

But a part of you knew how special this was.

Today, you are holding him once again… after years,

Crying because of another man.

Crying because of Wooyoung… His old friend…

Your old friend.

You just want this never-ending night to be over.

You needed time, to stop crying… Time to think.

Part 6: Timing

You hated “Time”…

Life happens… Time goes on without a care for your emotions, without a care for anyone’s feelings.

Time, the passage that left you behind at the peak of your teenage years.

It felt good at times but just some days, you could feel it. Feel the emptiness lingering at the back of your mind.

But now, you needed time. More than anything, you needed time to think about what had just happened today.

━━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━━

The memories of the early teenage years reeled in your thoughts. All the while, your head was buried in his chest.

He no longer belongs to you. You… are not his anymore.

You’re not anyone’s… anymore, and these thoughts frightened you.

His embrace comforted you while you melted away at his warmth. It distracted you from breaking apart this endearing connection.

As the night went by, you finally gathered the courage to pull away from him.

You’re not crying anymore, although your face was now swollen, red and soaked with fallen tears. You notice that his shirt was drenched in your tears as you bring your arms up to dry your face. You glance at his face with an apologetic smile.

“Are you okay?” Seonghwa look at you, only to look away at the distant roads.

A bitter laugh escaped your mouth… “I’m not okay,” You sighed.

“My boyfriend… just broke up with me,” You say while staring into the night sky.

“I know. I…heard”, Seonghwa stutter.

“Your boyfriend sounds like a jerk”, He spoke again, knowing full well, that it was Wooyoung. His old friend.

Hearing him say that angered you.

Wooyoung stuck by you during your worst times. He made you laugh with his whole being. He was there for you… He took care of you, and you did the same.

"He was there for me", You think. The person who called you today wasn’t him. You were still in denial. After all the things that happened, you still couldn’t shake away the pieces of hearts you left with him. The feelings you left with him when you kissed him goodbye at the airport.

“It’s Wooyoung…don’t you remember? You were friends with him in high school" You say although you knew… that he knew.

"And you don’t know anything about him,” You said, irritated by his words.

He did… probably more than you ever knew about Wooyoung.

Your thoughts yell at him… “HE was there for me when YOU weren’t!”

He doesn’t get to say those things when he was the one that left you.

Maybe saying “sorry” doesn’t make it all okay. Maybe it didn’t matter to Seonghwa if he said goodbye that day or not.

Maybe…he didn’t see you the same way, you saw at him.

All your pent up anger started pouring out of your body. But you were stern.

You stood up… looking forward, steadily. Head held up high with all the force you could muster.

Is it time?

Is it time to finally confront him?

there was that helpless silence again.

━━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━━

The concert ended a long time ago. The fans must have left the venue.

you looked at your phone to see a text from Ji Yeon.

“I’ll be waiting in the car if you need me"

You walked forward. Not having the guts to face him, you started to speak, facing your back at him…

Thinking that this, would be the last time.

The last time you will ever speak to him.

The last time he will ever hear your voice.

"You know what? … You could have at least told me why"

"Why you had to leave like that,” Your voice trembled at the thought of confrontation.

“You could have at least-”

“I did…"

Seonghwa cut you off.

You didn’t turn to look at him, but your face looks confused and baffled at his statement.

"My letter… I wrote you a letter” You could hear the disbelief in his voice as he recalls the day he left.

“Seonghwa…What are you talking about?” You ask while your eyebrows narrow in doubt and shaking your head in denial.

“The letter… It was so sudden… they gave me such a short time to decide and leave the city… I didn’t even get much time to say goodbye to my friends… And you” He continued.

“I didn’t want to text or call you and leave suddenly, so… I wrote you a letter"

You could not believe what was coming out of his mouth. your mind was unstable at his excuses.

"He can’t possibly be serious right now…What letter?” you think as you hear Seonghwa’s muffled voice described what happened that day.

You took a step forward and started to walk away.

“I wrote it and gave it to Wooy-"

...

You hear Seonghwa stop himself as the realization hits both of you.

You were no longer walking away.

You froze.

You could hear, the sound of wind brushing through the tree branches in this Midsummer night.

The whole world stopped and Time stood still. For the first time in your life, time was no longer passing you by. It stood still, and waited… for you to get on the passage that once left you behind.

For the first time, a piece fell perfectly into your puzzling life.

It fell into the perfect place while all the others blew in the wind…

Part 7: Let You Go (You & Wooyoung POV)

Maybe it was never meant to be…

“Maybe it’s time to let you go”

He thinks.

The day you left Korea he knew, you were going to slip away. He had friends that knew Seonghwa. He knew that it was only a matter of time. He knew that you were going to meet him there.

At the back of his mind, he also knew that you needed this.

He knew that maybe, it was time to let you go.

He loved you.

He loves you.

Still.

━━━━━━༻ p a s t ༺━━━━━━

On the first day of High School, he laid eyes on you for the first time, when he saw you walking with Seonghwa and Ji Yeon.

Seonghwa parted from you and Ji Yeon to walk with Wooyoung and his other friends.

His bitter unrequited, one sided crush... began that day.

“Who is that?” he asked Seonghwa, unable to take his eyes away from you.

You were radiating like a star in the daylight.

It was magic to him.

“Uhhh… she’s y/n, I just met her today. And that's her friend Ji Yeon” Seonghwa said.

He saw your eyes sparkling at the sight of Seonghwa…

The day he saw you for the first time, he knew that you were never going to look at him the same way.

The way he looked at you.

The way you… looked at Seonghwa.

He became friends with Seonghwa’s friends, which meant that he became friends with you and Ji Yeon.

Four Years of endearing friendships with you, Seonghwa, Wooyoung and Ji Yeon. The world belonged to the four of you. There were other people, coming in and out of your lives…

Yet the world revolved around the four of you when you were together.

Each and every one of you would do anything, to get back those four years…

To go back the time you were friends and nothing less or nothing more.

Everyone knew the relationship between you and Seonghwa was special. Everyone except you and Seonghwa.

Wooyoung didn’t know about the things that happened between just the two of you, except, he would notice the subtle changes. He saw the walls between you and Seonghwa slowly fall apart. It didn’t matter how high or how strong they were, he noticed. Ji Yeon noticed.

He was never going to come between the two of you.

The times Wooyoung spent with you, the four of you were always there.

Amid everything, he found everything that you did so endearing, adorable and he respected you for who you are. He loved everything about you. He saw that you were clumsy, intelligent and wise. He saw your flaws and quirks and still loved you anyway. He would get butterflies in his stomach each time he saw you enter a room. He could feel his heart beating faster when you were sitting inches apart.

He also knew that he wasn’t the only one feeling this way.

The only difference was that you didn’t see him the way you saw Seonghwa.

It was painful, to say the least.

But he saw how happy you were around Seonghwa. He wasn’t going to take that away from you.

Wooyoung being Seonghwa’s best friend, they only wanted the best for each other.

━━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━━

The day before Seonghwa left.

It was past 10:00 pm

Wooyoung got a phone call from Seonghwa that day.

“I need to tell you something”

“I need you to do this one last favor… for her"

He said.

It was a strangely quiet night that day.

There was a park next to Wooyoung’s apartment. A place the four of you used to hang out at night time looking at stars. A place where you all made late-night conversations that dove deep into your souls. The place that triggered conversations leading to teardrops that reflected the moonlight. It was merely a playground but for you four, it was perhaps the symbol of your friendship.

Wooyoung knew exactly where to go when Seonghwa called him to meet up. He saw Seonghwa’s back. His figure that was sitting on a bench crouched down. His demeanor had dark clouds forming at the top of his head.

At that moment he knew.

Seonghwa always talked about leaving… to go follow his dreams. It meant leaving his friends and everyone he loved. Wooyoung never thought this day would come. Although he knew how much talent and potential Seonghwa had, he never through this day would come. He never thought that Seonghwa would actually leave all of you.

Wooyoung approached Seonghwa.

He had an envelope in his hands. He was fiddling with it as if he didn’t know what to do with the envelope in his hand. It was as if he wanted to give it away as soon as he could.

"Hey”, Wooyoung said while making his way to Seonghwa.

Seonghwa’s head turned towards Wooyoung in an instant. He stood up slwoly while looking at Wooyoung concerned.

“Hey,” Seonghwa muttered. reluctant to let anything come out of his mouth.

“You said you wanted to tell me something?… Is everything all right?? Let’s just sit down first”

“No,” Seonghwa said… as if he was in a hurry to run away.

“Actually, I’m leaving…

Tomorrow”

Wooyoung let out a laugh “What are you talking about? Where are you going?"

He laughed because of how ridiculous Seonghwa sounded when he said those words without any context.

He laughed…

Because, at the back of his mind, he knew exactly what Seonghwa was talking about.

Seonghwa knew that Wooyoung didn’t need an explanation.

After all, they were best friends.

"I… I wanted to tell you at least.”

“I want to tell y/n too but right now, I don’t think I can look her in the face and say goodbye”

“Or even a phone call... she’d hate me”

“Just this once, can do me one last favor? Will you give this to her” Seonghwa asked Woooung.

“Of course,” Wooyoung said without hesitation.

There were no other intentions. The letter was meant to be for you and it was going to end up in your hands.

Seonghwa finally gave Wooyoung, the letter. The letter that holds a thousand words and feelings to be unraveled.

His hands… they felt heavy.

It seemed like he was about to burst into tears. Looking down, trying to trap the tears from leaping out of his eyes. Wooyoung felt the same. He thought that he was about to lose his best friend. They both held in tears because it’s not like them to cry.

It’s not like them to cry they thought, because they were who people thought they were.

Because when they act differently, people judge.

Because people are who determines what kind of children they are.

This was the mindset of these two teenagers.

Teenagers soon to learn what life is. Learn to love themselves as they are. Teenagers who were to learn how to truly love others. Learn to not care about what the world thinks of them. They would soon learn that as long as they were good, honest people, that it’s okay to cry if they feel like it. Cry happy tears, sad ones and all the other kinds.

But at that moment, they were just teenagers full of feelings and dreams.

And those teenagers were willing to do anything… right or wrong, to fulfill those feelings and dreams.

They talked for hours after. The typical things best friends talk about.

Both of them were known for their way with words. Perhaps the lack of it. But that night, they talked about the most mundane things for hours on end, while keeping a lump in their throats.

━━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━━

They said their goodbyes.

Wooyoung watched Seonghwa walk away.

Nothing was going to break the friendship they had.

Nothing except Time, Distance and somebody else.

━━━━━━༻❁༺━━━━━━

Mondays.

Everyone hates those right?

Wooyoung biked to school that day. It was sunny and cold.

His mind was filled with a thousand, million thoughts as he swept through the cool winds.

An envelope tucked safely inside of his bag, he parked his bike and made his way into the classroom.

He stopped himself by the classroom doors, at the sight of you.

You were sitting by the window as usual. Enjoying the warm sunlight hitting your face. Not aware of how heartbreakingly beautiful you looked. The small crack in the window blew wind across your face making you look even more breathtaking.

“There it goes again,” He thought.

That feeling in his heart, every time he saw you.

It always started in a blur…

Everything would go quiet and then, like a train getting faster and faster, his heart would start pounding like crazy.

Ji Yeon came up behind him and put her hand around his shoulders. At that instant, he snapped back to reality. The classroom was full of noise once again and he began to notice the people around him.

“What are you looking at?” Ji Yeon asked jokingly.

“Hm?” He asked without making eye contact and pretending to be clueless.

Everyone knew about his feelings for you. Everyone but you and Seonghwa.

“Nevermind, let’s sit down the class is about to start,” Ji Yeon said with a smirk on her face.

He went to sit at the desk behind you, while Ji Yeon sat beside you.

You turned to Ji Yeon, “Do you know where Seonghwa is? I didn’t see him in the morning and he’s not picking up my calls.”

“Did you try texting him?” Ji Yeon asked.

“Ya, but he’s the type to rather call than text you know,” you talked with a concerning tone.

“Don’t worry, he’s probably just too lazy to drag his ass out of bed” Ji Yeon, being herself, tried to make you feel at ease. You let out a laugh only to bring yourself back to worrying.

Wooyoung saw that you were worried. He tapped you in the shoulder while calling your name.

“Y/n…”

You looked behind at him with the same expression. “Hm? what is it?” “Do you know where Seonghwa is?”

Wooyoung didn’t know what to say. Nothing was coming out of his mouth. He managed to say just one thing.

“Can you meet me after school? There’s something I need to give you.”

You looked at his face in confusion and curiosity, only to agree to him.

“Sure… of course,” You said while nodding.

The teacher entered the classroom. You and Ji Yeon went about the day thinking that Seonghwa was just saying home for the day. You were planning to call him after school. Maybe drop by his house to see if he’s okay. Not in a million years, you would have thought that he left his friends. That he left you.

The last bell rang. Students were rushing out of the school.

Wooyoung was standing by the gate, waiting for you.

He was holding the envelope in his hands. This time he looked at it carefully. It was white in color and had a pretty border around the corners. Your name was written on it with Seonghwa’s handwriting.

He noticed you walking towards him.

Thoughts began reeling in his mind, all the while he stared at you from a distance.

“What did he wanna say to you?"

"Why did he only tell me?"

"Why am I the one delivering this to you?”

“It’s not fair,” He looked at the bright blue sky only to turn his head back your way.

Those feelings came back.

He was a teenager after all. A teenager that was willing to do anything for his feelings.

Wooyoung was a good student. A good person.

But it only took a split second to ask those questions.

“What if you never get it?"

"What if you never find out?”

“Will things be different… between us?”

He thought, watching you getting closer and closer to him.

When you approached him he was looking at you. Although it seemed as if he was staring into another world.

“Earth to Wooyoung!!” You said while waving your hand in front of his face.

He looked at you once again as if he looked at you for the first time ever.

The envelope was no longer in his hands.

It was yet again safely tucked away in his bag… never to end up in your hands.

Or so he thought.

“Oh hey,"

Wooyoung said under his breath.

You held out your hand expecting something.

"You said you were gonna give me something”

“Huh?” he said as if he was caught off guard.

He’s doing something he shouldn’t be doing. Yet he thought that this was his only chance to make anything happen between the two of you.

“Oh…” he put her hand away gently.

“I wanted to treat you today…” He said.

“Treat me?"

"Yeah… let’s go get some food. Do you want to call Ji Yeon too?"

He said, trying to sound less suspicious than he already does.

"No, she said she wanted to go home early today.”

“Something to do with her mom.”

He nodded, “Okay let’s go then”

“What do you wanna eat?” He asked looking straight ahead while walking out of the gates of your high school.

“Anything… as long as you’re buying,” You said, sounding like the happiest person on earth.

It made him laugh. It made him happy, to see you happy.

But he knew that your happiness wasn’t going to last long. He knew that you were never going to see Seonghwa after that day. Never in a way that would able for you and Seonghwa to truly be together. He had to find a way to tell you all about it. Any other way that wouldn’t involve you seeing that letter.

The air was cool that day, but not cool enough to restrict him or you from buying ice cream. He knew you loved ice cream. No matter how cold it was out, you would never refuse to buy your favorite ice cream. Let along someone else buy it for you.

You noticed the worry in Wooyoung’s face. He has been like this all day. He knew you were smart enough to figure out that something was wrong, but never acted upon it. Even while paying the cashier, he was thinking of the things he should tell you.

You two were walking on the sidewalk, next to each other, when you suddenly jumped in front of him and said,

“Jeong Wooyoung… is there something you want to tell me?"

You weren’t expecting him to be serious about this but when you said those words, he stopped dead in his tracks. His head lowered and then he looked at you with his soft eyes like he was sorry.

”But what for?“

You thought.

"There…” he pointed to a park that was nearby.

“Let’s go over there and talk,” he said.

They walked over to the park. You kept looking at his face but he had his head steady and looking straight.

A part of you knew that this was about Seonghwa. You had been worrying about him that whole day.

Still, you weren’t ready for what you were about to hear.

“We’re here now… just tell me.”

“You have to promise me that, you won’t freak out... o-or cry...”

“Okay sure, get on with it already”.

“Seonghwa…”

You kept staring at him, as though you didn’t want him to speak anymore.

“He left the city,”

Wooyoung said under his breath. He didn’t want you to feel this way. He thought you were about to break down in front of him.

Instead, you showered him with questions that were pouring out of your mind.

“What do you mean?"

"Where did he go?”

“Why?”

You didn’t move. you kept staring at him with teary eyes until you got the answers you wanted.

Wooyoung kept quiet. He didn’t know what to say. He knew that you would find out soon enough. He knew that it was better to just tell you at that moment. But all that came out of his mouth was,

“I’m sorry”

“What do you mean you’re sorry?”

“You’re supposed to know these things!!”

There was no one at the park. You could’ve screamed at the top of your lungs if you wanted to but you didn’t. No one would understand the frustration, the anger and the sadness you were feeling inside. Yet you kept yourself composed.

“You’re his best friend… How could you not know?” You said finally.

Wooyoung tried to speak.

“He didn’t-”

“I don’t wanna be here anymore," You cut him off.

You stood up.

"Thank you… for the ice cream,” you spoke.

At that moment he knew that you weren’t angry at him.

You were angry at Seonghwa for leaving. Perhaps leaving without a word. For disappearing into thin air like your friendship meant nothing.

You went home that day resenting everything about Seonghwa. You assumed that he didn’t want to be contacted by you or anyone he knew.

So you didn’t.

It was emptiness more so than anger or resentment.

You felt betrayed and cheated…

From the wrong person. but you didn’t know.

Wooyoung watched you walk away that day.

He felt ashamed and guilty but he didn’t want to lose you.

If he were to tell you what he had done then, he knew that it would be the end of it all. It was too late.

Although it wasn’t forever, he knew he had to live with it, until one day.

What he didn’t know was that this would be the day when everything will be destroyed between everyone he loved.

...

Months went by before the time you learned about Seonghwa’s whereabouts. You were at home cleaning the living room and there was a music show playing on the TV.

That was the day you found out.

Where he had been all this time.

You saw him on TV for the first time… in months.

At first, you couldn’t recognize him.

“How can a person change in such a short time,” you thought.

You thought while staring into the TV.

It read “ATEEZ” at the bottom of the screen.

“What a weird name,” You thought.

“Was this his big secret?” You thought.

You thought and you though…

You couldn’t stop thinking.

His hair was peachy blonde. It looked unfamiliar and yet, he looked like the same old Seonghwa, the longer you looked. His built was familiar and beautiful as always.

He looked like he was having the time of his life.

“He seems happy…” You thought.

The emptiness you felt for the longest started to fill with sadness.

You felt your legs giving out and fell onto the ground.

“Why is this affecting me so much?” You wonder.

You felt emotions you’ve never felt before.

You felt your heart getting tighter at every breath you took.

“He could have just said goodbye…"

“ If you just said something to me…”

"We would have been fine…”

You thought.

...

You were no longer the same person you were before.

You went to Wooyoung and he was there for you.

Everything you wanted… he had.

He was there to make you laugh when you were sad.

He was there to take you to places when you needed it.

He was there to bury you in his arms when you felt like you were alone in this world.

He was there when you were crying your heart out because of Seonghwa at that time.

That was the reason for this endearing relationship.

The endearing relationship that was built on a lie.

━━━━━━༻ p r e s e n t ༺━━━━━━

Today,

Wooyoung sits on the empty beach at midnight.

The place you two kissed for the first time.

There is a bottle of alcohol by his side and a worn-out envelope in his hands. It didn’t look white anymore… and the corners looks folded and messy.

Yet it was unopened.

Unopened and still waiting for lingering feelings to be freed into the world.

The feelings waiting to be read to you.

Still waiting to land in your hands.

He recalls the phone call he made to you as he gets sober into the night.

The moonlight reflects on the ocean.

It looks beautiful and blue and yet his head is down.

...

“Fine! I cheated on you!!” He remembers saying.

Except he didn’t.

“Maybe it would be easier for you to hate me if I said those words,” He thinks.

“You would have met him by now,” He thinks

“Maybe its time to tell the truth,” He thinks.

His phone starts vibrating on the ground.

Making it sink more in to the sand with each vibration.

He finally looks at his phone. His eyes are red from crying.

He sees his phone lighting up with your name on it through the tiny sand rocks.

He tries to brush up his hair that sticks to his face.

Amid the sounds of waves crashing the sand,

Despite the dark yet beautiful scenario he sits before, He only thinks of you.

He reaches for the phone.

As Wooyoung answers your call, and as he brings it onto his ear, he thinks…

“Maybe it’s time to let you go…"

The beach was empty that night.

Yet there was the sound of ocean waves rumbling onto the sand only to fade back away at his feet.

The beach was empty that night because people were too busy to admire the moon light reflecting on the calm waters on a Tuesday night.

The beach was empty that night and his remorse, shame and regret managed to fill the air around him.

Making him lonelier than anyone could ever know.

Part 8: If I Leave Now… (back to “second person”)

If we only saw what we wanted to see…

What would we see?

If we only heard what we wanted to hear…

What would we hear?

“Right now all I see is the ground at my feet. I see the two years I spent with Wooyoung flashing before my eyes."

"Right now… all I hear is the sound of the wind. My mind… is immersed in the sounds of laughter from those times I spent with him…"

"Were they real to him?”

Your back faces Seonghwa. You were about to leave, thinking you said what needed to be said.

…

“Wooyoung… I gave it to him…”

“Did you ever get it?…” Seonghwa asks, not taking his eyes away from your sight. Expecting your answer to be “Yes” and nothing else.

But his voice… You could hear the little trembles of insecurity and doubt.

It’s been years since you hear Seonghwa’s voice. You can feel his gaze on you for the first time in forever.

You can’t stand to hear his shaky voice.

You can’t bear to turn around to look at his face.

All you could think about is running away.

Runaway to find the answers.

Runaway only to run back to the person you don’t want to see.

“I have to go…"

"I have to talk to Wooyoung.”

You say.

You could only imagine what Seonghwa’s face looks like. Eyes wide and his soft hair brushing across his creased forehead. You knew Seonghwa enough to know that this isn’t what he wanted to hear at this moment.

Would anyone?

You hear things you don’t want to hear.

The last thing you want to hear is that the mundane yet wondrous two years you spend with Wooyoung was a lie.

Despite the severed feelings, you were willing to carry those memories with you because it made you happy in a puzzling way.

But now those memories, tainted with regret and bitterness.

Just because at the start of it all, there was a lie.

Countless thoughts go through your mind and you still can’t wrap your head around what happened today.

Although you knew that closing your eyes, does not make this day any less real, that’s all you can bear to do.

You close your eyes…

You close your eyes and hope to wake up from this nightmare.

…

“If I leave now…”

“If I leave now, when will I see you again…”

“If I leave now… will I find my way back to you.”

The wind sweeps past you as you take a deep breath.

You open your eyes facing the sky full of stars before letting yourself do whatever your heart desired at the moment.

You want to see his face before you leave.

Your eyes wander at his direction and the body carried the rest.

Your footsteps are reaching him as he stares at you hopelessly.

…

There you are… standing in front of him.

The familiarity lingers as you step closer to him.

He has changed so much but in your eyes, the same old Seonghwa stands before you with his hair black as the midnight sky. Eyes shimmering with tears, so close to trailing down his cheeks.

You can’t stand to look at his face.

“I didn’t need a letter…” You speak.

“I didn’t need a letter to know what you felt about me."

Your voice trembles as you speak.

Your hand finds its way to his face. Cupping his soft cheeks while your fingertips touch the ends of his hair.

your face tilts as his hand traces up yours overlapping yours. He held it tight as if he’s been waiting to hold your hand forever and as if he never wanted to let it go.

"I know…"

"I wanted to say goodbye… I’m sorry.” Seonghwa spoke with his, oh so handsome voice.

“His voice… It’s different now." You think.

Not a care for his apology because it’s not his fault.

It was never his fault.

"It’s not your fault,” you say.

Your eyes shut tight as you feel tears creeping up.

…

You think…

“Till next time”

“I have to go”

“What am I supposed to say?”

“If I leave now… I want to kiss you goodbye”

You think and you think, all the while your eyes wander all over his face.

You find yourself moving closer and closer to him as he holds your hand tight.

A kiss on his temple…

Unable to pull away, your face lies on his cheeks as you feel his eyes close tightly. You feel his teardrops falling on to your face and trace down your neck.

“Stay,” He says.

A kiss on the cheek. Boundaries and unspoken feelings.

A kiss on the cheek. It makes you want more.

As if you were saying that you will be back. As if you were saying that

“If I leave now… we will see each other again.”

“I’ll be back… I promise.” You say.

He wraps his arms around you as you were about to pull away.

“If you leave now… I promise… I will find my way too you again.”

...

You think about the words he said as you look outside the car window.

Ji Yeon is at the driver’s seat. Concerned as usual.

Refreshing air is coming in as you drive past countless fields on a lonely road. You immerse in the way you felt in his arms and his comforting words that gave you butterflies.

“What are you gonna do about Wooyoung?” Ji Yeon asks breaking your thoughts while keeping her head on the road.

You run your fingertips through your hair, taking a deep breath.

“Hmm… I don’t know."

"I have to call him.”

You say with no emotion.

Ji Yeon didn’t say anything. Maybe she knew you wanted space.

The whole drive back to the hotel was quiet. Except for the sounds of horns and the city noises once you entered the highway.

One problem goes away while another creeps in.

Love is blind they say...

Maybe in another universe, we could have been together…

Maybe in another universe, he never lied to me…

Maybe in another universe, the four of us could have still been friends…

But this is the real world and If I leave now… I will find my way back to the right person.

Part 9: I’m Okay

Sitting on the passenger’s seat. You wait as you reach your hotel room, suffocating in this silence that somehow comforts you. The sky is as dark as ever, yet the stars shine through, making you hopeful despite everything that happened today.

Is it ignorant, to feel hopeful now?

Is it selfish to feel like my future is somehow going to be better from now on?

“Hmmm.”

A life without that person?

Ji Yeon is driving and you looking outside the cracked open windows. Looking at other passengers waiting to pass through traffic.

“They have no idea what happened today at the venue. They have their own lives to worry about.”

"Why do I even care about this?”

You look at Ji Yeon who is concentrating on the road.

“I’m not alone." You think.

"Despite everything that happened today… despite everything that will happen when I finally call him, I will not be alone.”

It’s hard to look around only to realize that you’re alone. But you always had Ji Yeon. The friendship you two had was rather complicated but she was always there. Like she is now. Even though it may not seem like it.

“She has her own life… Just like those passengers waiting in traffic. Each with a story to tell on their own. Mundane, Adventurous, Tragic, Exhilarating, whichever it may be… at this moment, we’re all waiting for the traffic to pass us by.

I’m not alone… I have Ji Yeon, I have Seonghwa and the rest of the world.”

Just like those people, Ji Yeon has her own story and you were glad to be a part of it.

You let out a chuckle because of these ridiculous thoughts reeling in your mind when you should be thinking about that phone call.

“Is something on my face??”

Ji Yeon asks, not taking her eyes away from the road.

“…Oh? What do you mean?” You say whist being startled and snapping out of these absurd thoughts.

“Well for one, you’re looking at my face AND laughing- is something on my face- are you thinking about weird stuff again?” Ji Yeon says while finally looking at your direction with narrowed eyebrows, after stopping the slow-moving vehicle.

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN WEIRD STUFF??” You ask as you look away, not being able to maintain eye contact.

“I don’t know… you think about one small thing and go off on meaningless ‘thought trains’ She tries to make air qutes with her hands while driving.

“And then you space out and STARE at things LIKE MY FACEEEE jUST nOw and THEN you start smiling like some creepy- that’s weird honey-”

You can’t believe she just said that. That she called you out like that. In disbelief, you look at Ji Yeon with your mouth wide open.

Before you know it, you both start bursting out into laughter. It echoes throughout the car and out onto the highway.

“Thank you…

For being on my side.

For being in my life.”

“Like everything, this will fade away.

Just like the waves crashing onto the words scribbled on a lonely seashore… Reality awaits to crash and take away our laughter.

But I hope we can do it again.

Laugh like everything is just fine.

Laugh like our stars are aligned, exactly how we want them to be.”

……….

You two finally reach the Hotel room after what anyone would call a quiet car ride.

You threw your phone and purse onto the bed along with yourself.

Ji Yeon placed her stuff and the car key on top of the nightstand.

“I’m gonna hit the shower, those Atinys were so damn sweaty jumping around and screaming in my ear.”

Ji Yeon says waving her hand in the air while walking into the washroom.

You let out a laugh “yeah right… Like YOU didn’t jump around and scream in MY ear”

“What do you have for Yeosang anyway? Let me guess… He’s your bias?” You say while staring on to the ceiling of the hotel room.

“Whatever.” You hear Ji Yeon say along with the sound of the shower turning on.

You were exhausted and drained of energy but you managed to sit on the edge of the bed. Your phone lays on to your side and it lights up with notifications. Notifications from meaningless advertisements and people you’d consider acquaintances. It lights up again and again as if it is inviting you to do the very thing you’ve been wanting to do when you parted ways with Seonghwa.

You hear the sound of the shower running in the background as you pick up your phone. It feels heavy. Everything… feels heavy now. The most recent phone call was from Wooyoung.

You were tired to think anymore… To deliberate whether to call or not to call him.

You take a deep breath and without a second thought, you call him. You close your eyes and open your eyes and the phone rings with Wooyoung’s name lighting up the screen.

“Wooyoung… It’s me.” You speak.

Your heart drops as you hear him say your name.

Your heart drops as you hear the waves crashing and the sound of the wind through the phone.

You know exactly where he is.

“Are you sober now?” You ask, with the most impassive voice you could muster to mask.

“How did you know-” Wooyoung stops himself realizing that you knew him better than anyone.

“So you met him… Did he tell you about it?”

“Did you figure-”

“Wooyoung…

When I hang up this phone, It’s over”

You can’t listen to his voice anymore. The voice that brought so much pain to you just a few hours ago… You want to say the things you want to say and hang up.

“I’M ending this. I’M breaking up with you… Not you…

I think I deserve at least that much.”

It’s quiet on the other side, yet you could almost hear his thoughts.

There’s no need to explain why. There is no need to explain what caused all of this. He should know that better than anyone else.

After a few seconds of silence, you hear him speak.

“I’m sorry.”

Sorry doesn’t cut it.

But we’re adults now. Shouldn’t we be more mature?

We make mistakes when we are young, and carry those mistakes into adulthood.

Some people forget.

Some people forgive.

Some people grow out of them.

Is it ignorant to forgive somebody?

To forgive somebody but never want to see their face again?

Is it the “mature” thing to do?

To be okay with something that cannot be fixed?

To let go and cut ties?

To know when somebody regrets the things they’ve done?

To know that living with such regret is punishment enough for them?

For him?

The friendship, the deep-rooted bond between the four of you went above and beyond lies and secrets.

That’s what made you say…

“It’s okay.”

It’s okay because now you know.

It’s okay because maybe, he is sorry.

Because now you can end it.

And move on.

For good.

“One last thing… When I get back, I’ll come to find you…”

“Not for you… but for that letter.”

“Goodbye, Wooyoung.”

…

“When I hang up this phone, It’s over”

Words you say lingers in your mind as you lie on your bed once again.

You hear Ji Yeon turning off the shower and come out of the washroom.

“That was an awfully long shower Ji Yeon,” You say with a tiresome voice.

Ji Yeon nervously laughs and says “yea… sorry were you waiting for a long time?”

“No.. You’re just on time”

You get up and make your way into the shower.

“Hey, are you okay?…” Ji Yein stops you and asks.

“Yeah… It’s been a long day... I’m just tired.”

… … …

“Yeah… I’m okay.

Maybe it’s time to start believing those words.”

Chapter 10~

To be continued…? :)

5 notes · View notes

caffeineivore · 5 years

Text

R/J for Charlie

More of the Raven and Jude show, just because @coppercrane2 is awesome and deserves all the things. Actually, dedicated to her, and @apsaraqueen, and @antivanruffles, and @antivanonmytongue, and all my other R/J shippers. <3 you guys!

They’d struck up something of a friendship-- perhaps a flirtatious correspondence, if one wanted to be completely accurate-- after the messenger bag snafu at LAX and his impromptu visit to Manhattan. It had seemed the right thing to do to invite her for drinks and a tour of LA the next time she’d been in town. They’d had margaritas and taco truck tacos and walked through the Huntington in the afternoon, Raven looking impossibly pretty standing on the bridge of the Japanese garden, her silky black hair loose and flowing in the breeze. Then he’d in turn looked her up when he was in New York City again for a work summit, and they’d gone together to a Broadway show-- West Side Story. They’d had dinner together-- not at some fancy restaurant, but a hole-in-the-wall deli, and if Raven had made an incongruous picture in her sleek black dress and stiletto heels, wiping mustard off her mouth with scratchy napkins, Jude had found it endearing and rather adorable, and that’s when he knew he was truly in trouble.

She’d called him a cab back to his hotel, and on an impulse, he’d kissed her right as the car had been pulling up. Just a moment, little more than a peck on a mouth that tasted like Sprite and expensive lipstick, and he’d felt the little gasp and sigh against his own mouth before her lips pressed back against his, but there wasn’t time to say more than a quick “Good night” before the cabbie had honked, impatiently waiting for him to get on. He’d passed a slightly sleepless night wondering if it had been the wrong thing to do, especially considering the sheer impracticality of entering into anything more than a casual friendship with a woman whose life was a whole three time zones away from his own. Jude was not a flirt or a ladies’ man by any definition of the word, and certainly, Raven was not the type of woman one dallied with.

But she’d shocked him two days later, when it was time for him to leave and head back to LA, and she’d popped up at his hotel just as he was checking out of his room, with two Starbucks cups and a to-go bag from a bagel place. She’d been in a hurry-- there was some type of meeting with some landlord/building super or another, to set up an apartment for some fresh-out-of-the-backwoods-boonies model or another who’d just relocated to the big city from Small Town USA all of a week ago-- but she’d claimed that he was on her way, anyway, and she was so almost-defensive about the sweet gesture of bringing him breakfast and sending him off that he’d plucked both coffee and bagels out of her hands, set it perhaps-rudely on the concierge desk, and hugged her for perhaps too long before kissing her, again.

“I’ll call you when I get to LA,” he’d told her in a rush when he’d finally pulled back, heart stuttering a bit as he watched her thick, sooty eyelashes flicker slowly as her eyes opened. “I’ll miss you.”

“Yeah. Have a good flight. I-- I’ll miss you too.” That last bit was tacked on at the end just as he finally found the wherewithal to get his bags and the bagel and coffee, and even before his plane boarded, he knew he’d be counting down the days until one of them had a reason to fly across the country again.

That had been about eight months ago, and bless Raven’s contract with the very-famous, very still-not-eighteen Morgan Austen, because there had been many flights to LA, and that flirtatious correspondence had turned into something very akin to a long-distance relationship. He’d wake up to her voice at an indecent hour of the morning, and she’d fall asleep to his, sometime still fairly early to him at night. She no longer cared about facetiming him at inopportune times, and he certainly didn’t think her any less beautiful in a ratty old Columbia University hoodie and yoga pants and no makeup than her in expensive eveningwear, rubies glowing against the sleek darkness of her hair. The first night he’d stayed over at her place, she’d fallen asleep with her feet in his lap on the couch during the tail end of an episode of The Office, and he’d carried her to bed, both of them still fully dressed but for their shoes and jackets. He’d woken up in the middle of the night to her fingers tracing over his skin and sought out her mouth on feeling alone, before even opening his eyes. The next morning, they’d shared a very leisurely shower, where he’d taken his time washing every inch of her hair before she’d tackled him.

The distance wasn’t something they could truly ignore, however, the longer they were together. Raven’s career was thriving, as was his, and neither of them could sensibly be expected to move cross-country and make a completely fresh start.

Fall in LA is undoubtedly less picturesque than out on the East Coast, with its leaves changing colours and crisp mornings edged with frost, its high winds and cinnamon-and-nutmeg-scented coffee and pastries, but Jude doesn’t lack for work and other related distractions. He’s up for tenure review at the college that year, and there’s the whole process of putting together the tenure dossier and bringing the completed body of his work to the committee and deans. UCLA is no different from most large universities of its ilk-- professors are either awarded tenure after a certain number of years and an evaluated body of work has been produced, or terminated from employment. It is in the midst of this term of flux that a hush seems to fall over the very halls of his building, unusual indeed for this time of day.

Then he hears it-- the click-clack of Louboutins against the floors, and he peers out of his office door to see his sassy and beautiful New Yorker striding down the hallway like she owns the place, wearing a prim little skirt suit the same silky black as her sleekly-pinned hair. She smiles when she sees him, and he can all but hear the cluster of goggling chemistry majors left in her wake sigh in collective half-terrified awe.

“Well, this is a surprise. I didn’t know you were coming here.”

She reaches him, and as though she cares not a jot that there are others watching them, puts her hands on his face, presses her warm red mouth to his in greeting for a moment before pulling away. “I wanted to surprise you, I guess.”

There was more than that, just from the solemnity in her dark violet eyes. He lets her into his office, and shuts the door behind her back. He smiles, brushes a gentle fingertip over the slope of one smooth cheek. “You probably just cemented my reputation in this department as a badass once and for all. Not to mention, you’ve probably given hope to more than one student in these parts that the geeky science nerd can, in fact, someday have a chance with the beautiful woman.” He dips his head, kisses her again, gently. “You look beautiful. Beautiful and serious. What brings you here?”

“It’s Morgan’s birthday tomorrow. She’s turning eighteen. I was invited.”

Raven doesn’t state the implications of that-- they’re pretty obvious now, after all these months being involved in her life. Morgan Austen will no longer be a minor, and therefore, if the supermodel decides to do the sensible thing and move out to New York for work, Raven, as her agent, would have no more reason to continuously fly out to LA. She would be able to concentrate her workload once again on her home turf, the city she’d known all her life.

“I’m up for tenure review this year.” It’s apropos of nothing, really, but perhaps a part of him knows that they’re at a crossroads, and both of them could go in any direction. It would, indeed, be easier to separate now, do the sensible thing and stay to their respective cities and lives. But he can’t bring himself to draw away from her, and when she smiles-- a rare, real smile, not the polite one meant for company-- he can’t help but smile back. No matter what that means for them, she’s happy for him.

“You’ll get it. You’re too damn smart not to.”

“If I do, though, I’d pretty much have to stay here. And you--...”

“I’ll be happy for you. Because I love you, Jude Huntley. And it’s the best thing for you.”

Her words are brave and steadily spoken, but there’s a bead of moisture on her eyelashes, making her mascara seem even blacker than usual, and he feels his heart skip a beat in his chest even as he pulls her close. She’s a small woman, really, though her presence has the power to fill a room. But in his arms, her dark head tucked against the crook of his neck, those slim legs of hers leaned against the sturdy surface of his desk, she feels delicate, infinitely precious. Her fingers twine around the length of his tie, tugging him down just enough, and her sparkling eyes meet his.

“Don’t you dare do anything that isn’t right for you, all right? I will love you no matter where we are.”

“I love you, too. More than a job or a city. I hope you knew that already.”

“Shut up.” The fingers tugging on his tie now pick nimbly at their knot, and soon after, go to work on his buttons. His own hands find purchase on the curves of her hips, and a moment later, she’s seated on that desk with him standing between her legs, and the look she shoots up at him through that dark forest of lashes is sultry and, to his gratification, no longer sad. “Is there anything important on this desk that I need to be worried about?”

There are a number of his academic papers for the tenure dossier he’d been compiling, but he sweeps that aside carelessly onto a nearby chair. “Just you, love. Only you.”

It’s an indeterminate amount of time later that she leaves his office, almost looking as spic-and-span as she did when she’d come in, except her lipstick is smudged and her hair is loose and a little wild as it spills down her back. Neither of them are any closer to an answer to the unspoken dilemma than before, but he feels a bit better about the future. Whatever comes might prove incredibly difficult for a couple to weather, but he thought that, perhaps, they’d be the two people who’d prove that statistic wrong.

“Ahem. Extra credit assignment, Professor?”

Jude almost jumps out of his skin at Charlotte’s familiar voice drawling at him from across the hall. There’s almost certainly a smudge of lipstick on his collar, and he can’t be completely certain that his buttons are correctly aligned. “Umm...”

“These situations are usually found in bad pornos featuring actresses wearing short pleated plaid skirts, aren’t they? I could make a pun about your lady being well ahead of the curve. But perhaps it’s a good thing I figured out what was holding you up just before I knocked on your door, because you certainly wouldn’t have heard the banging over your exertions banging on something else altogether.”

“You, Professor Charlotte Rhys-Jones, are terrifying and evil, and I would never want to make an enemy of you.”

“Well, of course not. Why would you ever do something so foolish? I am a small and deadly commander of a diabolical penguin army. What did your girl come here for, aside from office-hours private tutoring?”

Jude is fairly sure that he’s blushing and can’t quite meet his colleague’s eyes, though he knows that she’d be sympathetic, all jokes aside. “She’s here in town because Morgan Austen is turning eighteen and invited her for the birthday party. Now that her celebrity client is no longer a minor, she’ll probably not have as many opportunities to come out this way.”

“Oh, God. She didn’t come out here to break up with you, did she? Because I think all the respect I gained for her not only walking in those ice picks but for getting you to partake in office desk shenanigans will be lost.”

“No. But I don’t know if we will have as many opportunities to be together as before.” Jude manages a self-deprecating smile. “I could always give up on tenure and move out east. There are probably schools out there that need Chemistry professors.”

“You could, but I’d hate you, and she’d hate herself, if you did that.” Charlotte says bluntly. “Weirdly, I have faith that you two might make this weird long-distance relationship of yours work out. There are frequent flier miles for these sorts of things. And the internet. People have done this since the Pony Express days, so you two should be fine. Plus, who knows what might happen? There could always be another Morgan Austen type out here somewhere just waiting for her. Do I get to be your Best Woman at the wedding?”

“I don’t know. You might have to escort the original Morgan Austen down the aisle.”

“No problem, and I don’t see you denying that there will be a wedding. Anyway, did you see that memo from the Dean that got sent yesterday?”

The conversation turns to work, and Jude sets thoughts of Raven aside for the time being.

She’d look as stunning in flowy white lace as black pinstriped linen, though.

#R/J #coppercrane2 #fanfiction #fanfic #senshi/shitennou #sailor moon

12 notes · View notes

stuckinthekookiejar · 7 years

Text

My Star pt 1

Pt 1 || Pt 2 (final)

Taehyung x Reader

Genre: Angst/Fluff

Summary: She was so wrong for him, and you knew it. If only Taehyung could realize it.

Word Count: 5,417

A loud pop resulted from you smacking your lips together trying to even out the layer of tinted gloss,

“Ooo, where are you going tonight?” Your roommate, Yeo Woon, gasped from her spot on the couch, “You’re going out on a date?”

“I’m sorry to disappoint, but I’m not going out on a date. I’m going to hang out with Tae.”

Since you were examining your makeup one last time with your pocket mirror, you didn’t see the pout on Yeo Woon’s face but you could most certainly sense it, “Geez, Y/N...don’t tell me you still have a crush on him.”

“What! Me? A crush..on him?”

“Oh c’mon, Y/N-ah. Everyone who knows you on this goddamn planet knows you have a crush on Taehyung. Aside from him, of course.”

“I...I do not! And even if I did...I got over it...” Your cheeks flared with heat as you quickly shoved your mirror back in your purse,

“You’re all dressed up, you’ve been smiling all day, and you used one of my facial packs last night which is weird considering you always complain about the sliminess. So basically, you must still have a crush on him if you’re doing yourself up like this just to ‘go hang out’.”

"Oh, shut up. It’s just that we haven’t seen each other in months since he’s been on tour...and he’s leaving again next week so I thought I’d dress up a little...”

“Suuuuuure.” Yeo Woon threw you a smug look before you headed out the door.

The night air ran across your skin making your hairs stand on end. It may have been summer time, but the night time felt just as chilly as a normal autumn day.

You missed being able to walk through the wet markets and bustling shopping avenues during the day. You missed being able to play at the arcade and run through the amusement park riding ride after ride without being afraid of being spotted. But of course, when Taehyung entered a life under the spotlight everything changed. Now you two were confined to only late night outings, and even then Taehyung still had to be covered from head to toe in an attempt to not get recognized.

So here you were, sitting on a bench in the middle of a small park under the dim light of a street lamp waiting for him. Music leaked through your earbuds and into your ears as the wind brushed against you. Mentally, you cursed at yourself for wearing a short sleeved blouse and shorts without thinking about bringing a jacket.

Suddenly, some pressure pressed down on the top of your head and your hair was being roughly ruffled causing you to jump. Swiftly, you grabbed hold of the arm and twisted it around you and flipped the person from behind the bench over you so that the perpetrator now laid at your feet.

“Ow....what the hell Y/N...” Taehyung groaned, massaging his back with a pained look on his face.

“T-Taehyung!” He got to his feet and stumbled toward the bench to have a seat,

“When did you learn how to do that?”

“Well, you’re the one who told me to take self-defense classes.” Your mind flashed back to high school when Taehyung first became a trainee. He told you that he couldn’t be there to protect you as much anymore, not like you really needed any protection anyway...he was just overprotective, but he still told you to take up self-defense classes if you had the time.

“I didn’t think you actually would.” You had him bend a little forward so that his elbows rested on his knees so you could see the spot on his back where he had landed when you flipped him over. There was a small dark patch which you knew would turn all purple and black by tomorrow. Taehyung winced in pain as you rubbed gently on the bruise,

“Geez...I’m so sorry, Tae. Wait here, I’ll go buy some ice and...” As you got up to leave, he grabbed your wrist pulling you back onto the bench and pinched your cheek,

“Aigoo, you never change Y/N-ah, always so motherly, my little star.” You felt like your cheeks were going to flare up again, especially at the sound of your nickname he always called you, but before he could notice anything, Taehyung let go of your cheek and pulled you into a headlock,

“WHAT THE...KIM TAEHYUNG LET ME GO!” All you heard was his laughter,

“Nope! This is what you get for throwing me onto the ground!” He continued to maniacally chuckle as you struggled to get out of his grip. It was no use prying your way out and he was too strong for you to forcibly rip off his arms from around your neck, so you chose the only option available to you,

“YAH!” Taehyung screeched as he immediately let go of you, “DID YOU JUST BITE MY HAND?”

You jumped off the bench, stuck your tongue out at him, and ran away across the park’s field as fast as you could,

“Why you little...you’re gonna get pay back!” Taehyung darted after you, chasing you through the freshly cut grass.

Under the moonlight the two of you ran around as if you were back in elementary school playing a game of tag. During times like these, you wished that you could stop time and remain here forever. You wanted to return to the days when everything was so much more simpler...when paparazzi wasn’t always shoved in his face...when you didn’t have to pretend to not know him when out in public...when your feelings weren’t so complicated.

Eventually, Taehyung caught up to you, tackled you onto the soft grass, and attacked you with tickles to your sides.

“Okay! Okay! I get it!” After a little while, Taehyung finally gave in and rolled over to lay down next to you on the grass. Moments passed by in silence with only the sound of both of your deep huffs after running around like wild geese piercing the summer air. Another gust of wind charged through the air, sliced at your nerves and caused chills to race down your spine.

“Pabo...” A piece of clothing, Taehyung’s jean jacket, was tossed over your face, “Why’d you wear something so thin? Aaaah...I see...you were on a date earlier weren’t you?”

Praise the heavens that the jacket was over your face or else Taehyung would’ve seen how red your face had become, “W-Why is everyone so curious about my dating life lately.... And no! I was not on a date, for your information.”

“Good.”

“Good?”

“Yeah good, because it’d break my heart to hear that you went on a date without telling me!”

“Yah. Why would I have to tell you if I went on a date or not?”

“Because...I’m your best friend after all.” Boy, did that statement really sting, “So if you weren’t on a date, why’d you dress up so nicely?”

“Why? Is it illegal to want to actually look nice from time to time?”

“Hmmmm, I just figured that the only reason why you’d dress up was because you were trying to impress some guy.”

From under the jacket, you turned your head and peeked at him. His side profile was ethereal as the moonlight softly kissed its edges,

I am trying to impress some guy....

Taehyung turned on his side and propped himself up on his elbow, “Speaking of dating...when are you gonna go find yourself a prince charming? You haven’t been in any relationship yet... You’re in college! It’s okay to date a little...I mean look at me! I’m super busy, but I have the time to date such an amazing person.”

‘Amazing person’ my ass

You took your hand and moved the jacket away from your face, but you still kept your gaze toward the star scattered sky, “That’s easy for you to say. You’re...you’re THE Kim Taehyung, super Hallyu mega star, super handsome and talented....me? I’m just plain old Y/N who still looks like prepubescent middle school Y/N.”

“Yah, Y/N look at me....Y/N-ah, c’mon, look at me...” When you refused to turn your head, he pinched your side causing you to spasm and stare into his eyes with the most menacing glare you could form. But he was still smiling. He won. He got you to look at him,

“You don’t look prepubescent Y/N....you look ‘predebut’.”

“Very funny, Tae.” You threw his jacket at him with as much force as you could, but of course he was capable enough to catch it before it hit his face,

“No, but seriously...don’t say things like about yourself Y/N. It makes me sad... You’re one of the most amazing people I’ve ever met, you know. If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t even be who I am today.” He wasn’t wrong. You were the one who pushed him to audition when the recruiters asked him to try...like, you literally pushed him. You pushed him into that room where auditions were being held because he was too nervous and shy to walk in himself. Who knew a small shove would lead him to an entire life of fame?

“Not only are you amazing, but...you’re beautiful too.” Heat pooled in your cheeks once again and in a panicked rush, you reached over and snatched his jacket and shoved your face in it, “What the...”

“I...I’m...I’m cold!”

“And that’s why you shouldn’t wear thin, fancy looking clothes to impress some date.”

“I WASN’T ON A DATE!”

“Suuuuuure.”

“Geez, you’re sounding more like Woonie everyday.”

“Psh, whatever.” Silence sat in the air as Taehyung laid back down on his back and gazed at the stars. You had slipped the jacket away from your face so that you could look at them with him. A tingling sensation sparked in your hand, the one next to Taehyung’s, and you had an urge to grab his. You wanted to hold him so bad...but you didn’t...you couldn’t....you felt like you never could.

Left and right, you passed by many idols as you walked down the bustling corridor. Any average person probably would have fainted by now after being surrounded by all the talent and beauty, but for you this was normal. You worked as a staff member for a well known music show and it was your job to schedule performances, keep track of them and to notify the idols when it was their turn to take the stage.

Today’s recording was just as hectic as every other recording with people dashing around, plenty of different managers talking with staff, background dancers loitering around in the hall...none of it fazed you though. In fact, through the job you made friends with many of the reoccurring faces of idols you saw every few months. However, there was a downside to all of this....and her name was An Miri as in A.Mi, the uber popular idol. Oh, and she happened to be Taehyung’s girlfriend as well.

You rounded one of the halls as you looked down at the schedule to see who was next up to perform, and it took everything within you to rip your hair out when you saw the name on the paper. You knocked several times on the dressing room door before you opened it,

“A.Mi-ssi, we need you on standby.”

There she was sitting in front of the vanity, her stylists making sure her makeup was perfect before she had to perform. She sat in her chair as if she were some queen, and everyone around her acted like her minions. All the staff doted on her and always made her feel comfortable. Always got her that water she politely asked for, or that towel to wipe her sweat away after a performance. She was always complimented on her good manners to the staff and other idols, both hoobaes and sunbaes. From anyone else’s point of view, she seemed like one of the nicest people in the work field.

But they didn’t know her true colors.

Miri stood up and thanked her stylist then made her way over to you, “Hello, Y/N-ssi. It seems we meet again.”

She eyed you as she bumped her shoulder against yours and started to head down the hall. You rolled your eyes and huffed before tailing behind her,

“Well, it’s not like we can avoid that, A.Mi-ssi.”

“I mean, I’m sure we could.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“Come to the back exit after the recording. I need to speak with you. Privately.” Miri flipped her hair, making the strands collide with your face, before taking her place center stage. All her arrogant attitude was gone by the time she had walked on the platform and the crowd chanted her name. You wondered how people could buy such an unbelievable act.

Miri had always had some vex towards you. From the very first moment Taehyung introduced you to her, you could tell that her smile and polite attitude were totally fake. She always pulled the “friendly” card whenever Taehyung and boys or really anyone else was present, but when you two were alone...that was when the real Miri came out.

The heat of the concrete wall burned your skin ever so slightly, but it hurt like hell. You peered down at your wrist watch. It had been a good ten minutes since Miri told you to meet with her and you were sure that she’d be done by now. It was safe to say that you were getting increasingly impatient.

Just as you were going to head back inside, the heavy metal door swung open. Miri came walking out with a hand on her hip and annoyance in her eyes.

“You wanted to talk, Miri-ssi?

“How do you explain this?” Miri shoved some sort of photo in your face, but you couldn’t make it out since she held it so close to your face that your nose was touching it. Miri seemed to not make any effort in giving you a better view, so you snatched the photo yourself so that you could actually have a look at the damn thing.

As soon as your eyes adjusted, you could see that there wasn’t just one photo, there were several. One depicted Taehyung pinching your cheek on a bench. Another one showed the two of you running around a field. The last one captured the moment when he and you laid down in the grass as you gazed at the stars. All these photos...they were from the night that you last hung out with Taehyung a few days ago.

You were baffled though. You were so sure that there were no other people around that night. And even if some reporter did catch you and Taehyung together, it would have been all over the news by now...so why were these pictures with Miri? There would be no reason for her to have these unless...

“Where did you get these photos?”

“Who cares where I got the photos from? What really matters is the reason why YOU were with MY boyfriend!”

The heaviest groan left your lips, “Is this what you’re really pissing over? If you’re so curious, why don’t you ask him yourself?”

You turned to leave, but she grabbed hold of your arm, “Listen here, you little rat, take your filthy hands off my boyfriend or else.”

“Or else what?” you scoffed.

“Or else I’ll have these photos released.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

She was going to release the photos? You knew damn well that if those photos got released, even if all they captured was an innocent night out between two friends, Taehyung’s name would be burned down to the ground. And Miri, Taehyung’s so called “girlfriend” was willing to let that happen.

“Tell me, Miri-ssi, do you really love Taehyung? Or are you just using him for attention?”

“What? Me, using him? What kind of nonsense is that?”

“Stop the bullshit. Don’t you dare think that I can’t see straight through you. You know goddamn well what will happen if those photos are brought into the public’s eye...and you’re willing to do that? To Taehyung? You already have everyone’s attention as 'Korea’s ideal girl’ and as ‘BTS’ Kim Taehyung’s girlfriend’. What more do you need? Do you really need use Taehyung just to play victim? Just to get pity? Just to make some good publicity?”

She scoffed at you, “Hmph, think what you want, but I’m just protecting what’s mine.”

“If following your boyfriend around and threatening his friend to leave him alone with photos that could be used to against him is your definition of ‘protection’...that’s one shitty definition.” At that, you retreated back inside without giving her a second glance.

Namjoon passed you a cola, the only thing that was available in the Bangtan dorm’s refrigerator at the moment.

“Damn, Joon-oppa,” you managed to sneak a peek of the interior of the fridge before he shut it, “Six whole boxes of Sprite? Why?”

“Eh, Hobi likes Sprite better than the cider here, I guess, so he decided to buy some when we went to America.”

“But they sell Sprite in Korea don’t they?”

“Apparently he likes the ‘foreign’ taste.”

You shook your head and laughed as you popped open the small, cylindrical can. In a swift movement, you brought the metal to your lips and downed almost half of the fizzy drink in a few seconds.

“Woah, slow down there.” Namjoon pulled the can out of your hands, “No need to drink it that fast. Not like it’s beer.”

“I kinda wish it was though.” You rested your head against the cold surface of the kitchen counter and groaned. Namjoon walked over to you and leaned back on the counter beside you,

“Wanna talk about it?” He asked as patted your back.

When you and Namjoon first met, the two of you clicked. Not in a romantic sort of sense per say, but he was more like an older brother to you and you were a little sister to him. Aside from Taehyung, Namjoon was the other person who you’d vent all your problems to...especially when it came to topics that you couldn’t talk to Taehyung about...like Miri.

You repositioned yourself so that you leaned against the counter like Namjoon, “It has to do with...her.”

You nodded your head in the direction of the doorway that led to the dorm’s living space where Taehyung and Miri were cuddling on the couch. You had come over because Taehyung had invited you since it was one of the last nights before the boys had to head off to continue their tour abroad. Of course you agreed to coming to the small party...but you dreaded the fact that Miri was obviously also going to be in attendance.

When you arrived at the dorm earlier, Miri was already there and the two of them were doing all that mushy couple-y stuff. It made you cringe so hard that you retreated to the kitchen and that was why you were here now. In the kitchen. Sulking. Over Taehyung and his girlfriend.

“Y/N-ah, it always has to do...with her. What did she do now?”

Namjoon and the boys never actually had seen Miri’s true bitchiness in action, but they weren’t stupid. They could sense her fakeness after a few interactions...well...except for Taehyung. He seemed head over heels for the girl. This was his first ever real relationship after all. The poor boy was blinded by love and no matter how many times you or the boys tried to talk to him about Miri possibly just using him to get extra fame, he’d instantly become defensive of her.

This strained your friendship with him. You’ve had plenty of fights with him over his girlfriend, but Taehyung just wouldn’t have it. Just a few months ago, before his tour began, you and Taehyung got into another argument over Miri.

Since you worked as a staffer on a music show, you were at the broadcasting company to hand in the finalized schedule of the performances happening that week. Miri had also been at the company due to some variety show she was filming. While on break you happened to overhear her complaining to her stylist about how much Gucci Taehyung owned, yet he hadn’t bought her anything Gucci related yet. It was like she was expecting him to get her all that materialistic shit just because she was his girlfriend.

This, of course, pissed you off and so you went to Taehyung to tell him the utter truth about Miri’s character. You thought you were doing him a favor. You thought that you’d help stop him from wasting his precious time with someone like Miri. But no. Taehyung absolutely snapped when you started to tell him the truth. He told you to stop talking bad about Miri. He straight up yelled at you, which was most certainly uncalled for since you didn’t explicitly curse Miri out (although you did want to call her a “materialistic, fake ass bitch”).

Because of that argument, you and Taehyung didn’t talk for the first couple of months while he was gone. No messages. No calls. Nothing. Taehyung was the kind of friend who’d always message you constantly, and you felt broken without even receiving just a single dot from him. And you guessed that he felt the same because after some time he did message you and apologized for yelling at you the way you did. You also apologized (even though you didn’t really do anything wrong) and you two made up and he promised to hang out with you as soon as he got back to Korea.

And so you did hang out as soon as he got back to Korea.... and of course, Miri had someone snoop around and follow Taehyung and take pictures of you two even though you were just hanging out as friends. And this led you to here, spilling your problems to Namjoon once again because you knew that Taehyung would have none of it.

After explaining the entire situation of the photographs and Miri threatening to release them at the expense of Taehyung’s name, Namjoon brought a hand to his temple and shut his eyes. You guessed that this and Miri also gave him a migraine,

“Dammit...” Namjoon groaned, “Why don’t you tell him? Maybe then he’ll confront her about the photos she has.”

“Tsk, right.... like Taehyung’s ever gonna listen to me about Miri. That boy is too blinded to ever accept anything I say about her. Even if I bring up anything about Miri, Taehyung will get all defensive and close himself off to me... He just won’t listen.”

“How do you feel about this whole thing?”

“I feel like it’s wrong. She shouldn’t use him like that... Who does she think she is doing this to...”

“No, I didn’t mean to ask about your opinion on her. I meant...how do you feel?”

“Me?” You looked down at you feet and thought about it before speaking, “I feel...helpless...I guess....”

“And why is that?”

“Because I want only the best for Taehyung. He deserves so much more than...her.... and I want him to see that she isn’t good for him. But he won’t listen to me anymore....”

Namjoon nodded as he listened to you, occasionally taking sips from his own can of soda, “So you’re just going to give up then?”

“Huh?”

“You said he won’t listen to you...so does that mean you’re going to stop talking to him?”

“What! No...that’s not what I meant...”

“Well, it sure does sound like you’re at the verge of giving up.”

“I don’t want to...I want him to see the truth...I really do, but...but I don’t know how.”

“Just keep doing what you’re doing. Talk to him.”

“But I’m scared that if I keep pushing him...I’ll eventually push him away...forever. I’m scared of losing him, oppa.”

“You won’t ever lose him. You’re a precious person to him, Y/N. If he lost you, he’d probably lose all function.”

“Ha, don’t be so over dramatic.”

“I’m not! You should’ve seen him after you two argued before tour began. We had to drag him out of the hotel for rehearsal and the concert. He didn’t even want to go sight seeing. He just stayed in the hotel all day sulking as he looked at his phone. Jimin had to comfort him and luckily he convinced him to message you after a while. Even if you two have patches down the road, that’s normal. Even we argue amongst ourselves at times, but our group is still together. We got over the issues and we made up. That’s what healthy relationships entail, so just talk to him.”

“Are you sure?”

“Consistency will eventually garner results, trust me.”

“Oppa, we aren’t talking about music you know.”

“I know.” He shrugged before he headed off toward the living room. You hated when he did that: giving you his advice then walking away as if it were some dramatic scene in a movie.

After a few minutes thinking to yourself, you finally mustered up the courage to go to the living room and speak to Taehyung. He was going to leave again soon, and this time he’d be gone for even longer than just a couple of months. You wanted to get this issue out the way before he left.

When you walked into the living area, Namjoon managed to snatch away Miri’s attention leaving Taehyung alone on the couch flipping through some of the channels on the television.

“Hey, Tae.” You plopped down next to him.

“Y/N! There’s my little star, I was wondering where you were. I see Yeo Woon couldn’t make it.”

“Yeah, she had work so...”

“Oh, okay. There isn’t anything good to watch on TV, but I did find this cool anime the other day. Do you wanna...”

“Um, actually Tae...” you interrupted, “I was hoping I could have a word wit you...privately.”

Taehyung put the remote down on the couch and nodded, “Sure. I’ve been wanting some fresh air anyway.”

The sky was streaked with orange and the warm evening breeze brushed against your skin. Luckily, along with the dorms came with a private rooftop which allowed for a place to have a nice private conversation without being bothered.

The two of you stood near the edge of the roof near the guardrails and peered out at the view of city rooftops and the slowly darkening sky before you,

“Ah, it’s so nice isn’t it, Y/N-ah? The sunset reminds me of our high school days when you’d make me sneak up to the school roof at night to go star gazing. I never really got the fun in it, but I do have to admit that the view was beautiful.”

You hummed in agreement, eyes trained to the floor not even looking at the sky like Taehyung was.

“So, what did you wanna talk about?”

“It’s about Miri-ssi.”

“Y/N...” Just as you predicted, Taehyung’s demeanor completely changed. He went from relaxed to stern in an instant.

“Just hear me out, Taehyung...please.” A few moments of silence went by before you continued, “Has Miri-ssi...has she asked you about that night when the two of us hung out?”

“Mm...yeah, she did. How’d you know?”

“She asked you? Really?”

“Yeah.”

“What did you say?”

“I just said that there wasn’t anything to worry about. I explained that you’re my best friend, that’s all.”

“Oh...okay... Uh, Taehyung?”

“Hm?” You turned to him. He was still looking out in the distance and no trace of that once jubilee personality could be sensed from him,

“Have you ever thought about why Miri is with you?”

“She’s with me because she loves me, Y/N.”

“Do you really believe that? Taehyung...I’ve known you since middle school. I know you’re not this stupid and blind. Can’t you see that Miri isn’t the person she appears to be? She’s not good for you.”

Taehyung lowered his gaze. His fringe covered his eyes, the grip he had on the railing tightened. After years of knowing him, you didn’t even need any sort of physical indication to tell that he was pissed off.

A gust of wind struck your figures and blew Taehyung’s bangs out of the way of his eyes. You could tell that he really was angry,

“What is it do you and the rest of the boys seem to have against Miri? All the other guys have been pestering me about her too! Why do you guys hate her so much?!”

A small migraine started to form in the back of your head, “Are you fucking kidding me? You’ve been with her for eight months now...how could not see who she really is? She’s a materialistic, controlling bitch who’s only using you for fame and fortune!”

“You think that I don’t know that?” His tone somehow got deeper that it already was,

“What?”

“You really think that I don’t see the kind of person Miri is? I know she wants me to buy things for her. I know she wants me to take her out on dates so she can brag to her friends or gain more media coverage. Trust me, I know. You’re right about me not being stupid and blind, Y/N.”

“What the hell...if you knew all of that already, then why the fuck are you still with her?”

He sighed as be pushed himself away from the railing and turned around to lean back on the metal fence,

“Because I want to help Miri.”

You didn’t even have to ask to know what he meant. For some odd reason, Taehyung had always been capable in changing people for the better and most of the time all it took was to just interact with them and talk to them. He changed you too.

In middle school you were always picked on. You were the quietest kid in the class, the easiest to mess with...the easiest to get pushed around. And you let the kids do that to you until you met Taehyung. He was the one who taught you how to stick up for yourself...well...he told you to punch your bullies in the face, but at least that worked. Your bullies backed off and that sense of triumph changed you. Taehyung changed you. He could change almost anyone...emphasis on ‘almost’.

“Tae, you can’t help everyone you meet. Some people don’t change whether you like it or not.”

“If you’d just give her a chance, Y/N, then you’d see that Miri isn’t as bad as you think she is.”

“Did you know that she had us followed?” He turned to you with an unreadable expression. Had you finally caught his attention?

“Miri came to me today and you know what she showed me? She had photos of us when we were hanging out. She’s spying on you!”

“No...that can’t be.” You heaved feeling stupid for actually believing that he’d listen to you for once, “Paparazzi follow me around all the time, Y/N. It must have been one of them.”

“But why would she have those photos? I doubt that the press would’ve just given them to her without making an even bigger fuss. Plus I thought you said that no one would have found us at that park. Miri obviously paid someone to follow you around!”

You were so desperate. You wanted him to believe you. You wanted only the best for him and Miri wasn’t the best for him.

Taehyung took a few moments of silence nodding his head trying to figure things out,

“How do I know you aren’t lying?”

“Excuse me?”

“You’re right. Nobody knows about that park we went to aside from the two of us. If those so called photos actually do exist, the only real suspect is either you or me. And I’m pretty sure I didn’t pay anyone to follow us around.”

You shook your head as you scoffed, “Are you really accusing me of lying?”

He just shrugged as he looked up to the sky. Disbelief painted your face.

“Wow, Taehyung...just wow. I didn’t know you could be such a complete ignorant ass. I guess people do change.”

Taehyung only heard your footsteps as you retreated back down the stairs. He tried so hard to hold them back, but the tears he felt coming trickling down his cheeks.

The sky grew into a bluish black, but it was dark. Too dark. It seemed like the stars weren’t shining tonight.

Gif not mine creds to owner

502 notes · View notes

blaizekit · 7 years

Text

The After Party

1/2 Prince | Odd Squad throws a bash fit for legends to celebrate the opening of Infinite City and Infinite Band’s tour. Guiliastes quickly realizes he’s the only responsible one in the room. It’s a tough job for a bard keeping the drunken fangirls off an even drunker Prince. Gui/Prince

It was the night after Infinite Band's successful debut concert in Infinite Rhapsody hall, and everyone was celebrating.

Swan and Yulian had planned everything perfectly so that the tour's after-party fell on a weekend. This way, the band as well as their fans could stay up late in Second Life (which inevitably meant they'd be waking up later in real life). Those that had to be up for work or do week-end cram classes left extremely disappointed, but everyone else following Infinite Band's tour flooded the streets and taverns of Infinite City for what would become Second Life's biggest-ever party.

Aside from celebrating the band's very fruitful tour, it was also a sneak-preview of Infinite City itself. Therefore, Yulian had all the available shopkeepers and vendors keep their doors open late into the night to welcome the guests with special promotions and previews of their products. The goal was to make every player anticipate the final opening of Infinity City to the point where they'd gladly sell their own foot just to live there. (Not that that was ever going to be a problem.) Infinite Band itself was hosting the party at Infinite Restaurant. Kenshin and Sunshine were playing the bouncers; whenever a fangirl got too rowdy, they would politely suggest she go see some of the other sites.

Two of the band members were missing, though. Wicked had to go to the lab the next day for a project, while Ice Phoenix had to babysit her little brother while her parents were out of town.

"It's not my fault, alright?" Wicked winced as Yulian wished him a fun day with a sweet but strangely chilling smile. "Do you think I'd rather be writing up lab reports or hanging out with you guys?" He shot a glare at Gui, who was pushing the boundaries of personal space with Prince, as usual.

Meanwhile, Ice Phoenix was overheard saying, "He's tall enough to turn on the TV, he can look after himself," before Wolf very purposefully steered her out of the restaurant.

Prince was sitting in his favorite spot with Gui and Nan Gong Zui, drinking and laughing. There were hoards of badly-hidden fangirls lurking around them with hearts in their eyes.

Nothing whatsoever about this scenario pleased Wicked. It was bad enough that Prince attracted fangirls wherever he went. Worse still that he actually had a drinking buddy, but at least Nan Gong Zui didn't seem to have that kind of inclination toward Prince. What Wicked really couldn't stand was the fact that Gui was there too. It wasn't fair. Wicked's biggest advantage in their rivalry over Prince was that he got to spend more time with him.

Wicked marched over to their table.

"Xiao Lan," he said in whisper chat. "How long are Yulian and Swan making you stay for the party?"

Prince smiled abashedly. "Well, I'm the main host and attraction here. I should stay until most of the people have gone home."

"Do you have your alarm set?"

"Yes, Mom." Prince laughed silently. "Don't worry, we're not going to be late. You know that Yang Ming and Min Bin are going to be waking up later than me. You're the only one that has to actually do any work tomorrow, Zhou-gege!" He gave his trademark snicker.

The Zhou siblings and the Feng siblings were supposed to be going to a movie they'd all been looking forward to the next day. Wicked had set up this arrangement because although he really, really wanted to check up on Xiao Lan after the party, he was at least trying to keep out of her business in real life. He knew that she was strong and did not appreciate anyone's feelings being pushed on her (Exhibit A: Gui). It was only in Second Life, when he had to deal with that irritating bard flittering around, that he stepped in so often.

"Hey, Wicked, what's up?" Nan Gong Zui asked. "Do you need something?"

"You were talking to Prince in private chat, weren't you?" Gui said with a taunting look. "It's obvious when you stomp right over here and have a staring contest with him. You should try to be more subtle when you talk behind people's backs."

"It's got nothing to do with you," Wicked said venomously. "I was just reminding him not to sleep too late because we're going somewhere tomorrow. You know, in real life."

As expected, Gui's face darkened, and he gave Wicked a look that said quite clearly that he wished he would go find the deepest hole in Second Life and jump in it. What wasn't expected was the message he sent along with the look.

"It's one thing to rub it in my face that you know Prince in real life," he sent furiously, "but I can't believe you'd endanger him like that by blurting out you're going to see him tomorrow. Have you forgotten they know who you are now, too?"

Wicked was struck speechless.

He felt horrified, because Gui was actually completely right. He'd already denied knowing Prince's identity in front of the cameras. If someone found out that was a lie, and knew an exact day he was going to see Prince, all they would have to do is follow him. How could he have thoughtlessly put Xiao Lan in danger that way, just for the sake of their stupid grudge?

He hadn't thought of that, and yet Gui spotted it right away. What was wrong with him?

"Do Prince and Wicked know each other in real life?" Nan Gong Zui asked curiously, looking back and forth among them.

"Yeah, we go pretty far back, actually, but we'd been out of touch for a long time before Second Life." Prince said cheerfully. Gui and Wicked both clapped their hands over his mouth at the same time.

"You'll just forget that little detail, won't you, Nan Gong Zui?" Gui said while Wicked hurriedly talked to Prince in a private chat. "After all, the whole world is looking for Prince. We'd like as little personal information about him to get out as possible."

"My lips are sealed," Nan Gong Zui said. "To me, all that matters is the Prince here and now. Everyone deserves their privacy." His eyes twinkled as he raised his cup to his lips. "Might want to be more careful in that case, though, what with the wild hoards around."

Wicked glared at the crowd of Infinite Band fangirls hovering nearby, which seemed to have only gotten bigger with three of the bands' members all in the same spot. They didn't seem to have reacted in any way, so perhaps they hadn't heard. He still couldn't believe he'd been that stupid, though.

Suddenly he heard the beeping in his head that meant the system was alerting him to wake up. It would give him five minutes to finish his business before it surrendered his consciousness back to the real world.

"I'm about to log off," he said. "I'll see you guys later. Be careful around all those fans." He smiled and added privately: "Xiao Lan, I'll call before I get to your place tomorrow. Don't come down to the bus stop beforehand, just in case someone is following me."

"Alright, Zhou-gege."

And Prince waved and said "See you later!" with a smile, but his eyes looked sad, and Wicked knew that he'd made him... her feel guilty again.

Zhou Ling Bin removed the game mask and opened his eyes.

It was just like Xiao Lan to feel bad about him possibly getting stalked in real life when he was the one that put her in danger of getting found out and stalked. He hated seeing those eyes full of guilt. It seemed like she looked at him like that every time he did something for her in real life. When would she figure out that he would wait as long as it took? Her pity was not what he wanted.

With a sigh, he got up to get ready for the day. As much as he'd deserve it for the stupid blunder he'd made, he really hoped that his day with Xiao Lan wouldn't be ruined. Even with both their little brothers in tow, every moment he got to spend with her was more precious to him than the sun.

Incidentally, it was a probably a good thing Wicked left when he did, because the rest of the evening would have been a major strain on his sanity.

Shortly after he left, Nan Gong Zui called over Kenshin (who was playing his usual role of underappreciated helper and, unbeknownst to the others, was largely the reason the fangirls hadn't been close enough to hear Wicked reveal he knew Prince in real life).

"Prince tells me you're the strongest in Infinite City now? You came back from the Eastern Continent, right?"

"Yes." Kenshin said.

"Yes to what? Are you the strongest or not? Anyway, I had an idea. Come sit down."

Kenshin looked at Prince, who nodded vigorously, and sat reluctantly beside Nan Gong Zui.

"Kenshin, the quickest way to get The Righteous Blades to accept anyone as the strongest is to defeat me in a drinking competition!" He slapped Kenshin on the back genially and slid him some rice wine.

"Can I refuse?" he asked pointedly.

"Aww, come on, Kenshin, you don't have to take work so seriously," Prince said. "You can have fun at this party, too!"

I wonder if it's possible to get an NPC drunk. Heehee, that sounds like fun! is what he was really thinking.

"If you say so." Kenshin sighed and accepted the drink.

An hour and a half later, it was becoming increasingly obvious that either it wasn't possible to get an NPC drunk, or Kenshin just had a bizarrely high tolerance. Nan Gong Zui and Prince (who of course couldn't resist joining in) were loudly singing love ballads and Kenshin's stiff poker face hadn't changed at all. Meanwhile, the fangirls started creeping in. They were practically draping themselves all over all four of the men, giggling and stealing drinks whenever possible. Everyone was generally being very loud, and Kenshin wondered whether it would be possible to slip away anytime soon.

Eventually Nan Gong Zui ended up passed out and snoring at the table. Kenshin wanted to sigh in relief.

"KENSHIN!" Prince roared, stomping on the table with one foot, causing several of the girls to cry out (in surprise or admiration?). "I WON'T LOSE TO YOU, YOU BASTARD! POUR US ANOTHER ONE!"

The crowd cheered and poured the two another round.

"Prince, maybe that's not a good idea," Gui pulled him back into his seat. "You've already had a lot, and besides…" he leaned to talk into his ear, "he's not human. Don't you think it's possible you can't win, even if you try?"

Gui was slightly nervous about the situation. He'd had a little bit to drink himself, but once the fangirls started seating themselves around them, he realized he needed to keep his wits about him and stopped. He'd already won a point over Wicked today; he didn't want to lose the upper hand by allowing a drunken Prince to get dragged off by rabid fangirls.

"BULLSHIT!" Prince said too loudly. "Look! His face has gotten red!"

Everyone looked. Kenshin's normally flawlessly pale face did have a slight flush to it.

"Kenshin, are you drunk?" Gui asked in amazement.

Kenshin thought about it for a moment.

"What does that mean?" he said finally.

"Ah… nevermind," Gui said.

"The first one down is out! Come on Kenshin." Prince sloppily poured Kenshin another drink, getting more on the table than in the cup.

"Whatever." Kenshin sighed again and took a sip.

"I still don't think–" Gui started, but then he noticed Nan Gong Zui was starting to disappear among a gaggle of fangirls. "Damn it! I can't keep all these drunks safe!"

Gui grumbled and cursed as he dived in to save Nan Gong Zui. He had no choice but to drag the unconscious warrior up to one of the rooms upstairs, which had a barrier cast over them to bar against unauthorized entry. Infinite Band had reserved all of them in the event of something like this.

He expected the drinking competition to still be going strong when he got back, but when he got down to their table, Kenshin was nowhere to be seen. Had he finally escaped? More importantly…

Gui's eyes bugged out. Prince was sitting on the restaurant bench with a girl on either side of him, looking like they knew less about the meaning of personal space than he did. His heart nearly stopped as one of them swooped in and kissed Prince on the lips, making small noises of satisfaction. She started fumbling to unbutton his shirt.

Gui screamed in pure rage and ran over, not caring who he hit as he flailed and shooed and pushed everybody away. He plucked the girl off his Prince and found an obliviously unconscious elf, face looking kind of silly in his drunken happiness.

Gui gathered Prince to his chest and glared around at everyone with a look that rivaled the Blood Elf himself. "I won't let anyone touch my Prince."

Instead of being intimidated, they all giggled more.

"You can have him," the one girl he'd pulled off Prince said coyly. "as long we get to watch when you touch him."

They all tittered and Gui could feel himself blushing to nuclear levels. Really, since when did young girls talk like that? He made a mental note to never, ever let the fangirls have alcohol ever again.

"No one is doing anything to Prince. Prince is going to bed right now," he said firmly. He picked Prince up and shouldered past everyone. He'd never felt awkward being close to Prince before, but their continued whispering and insinuations about going to bed were making him flustered.

"You can't follow!" he snarled back at them as he went up the stairs, not caring if everything he said made it worse. "We've got a barrier set at the top of the stairs and only people with permission can go through!"

"Stingy!" they yelled after him as he passed through the barrier and down the hall.

Gui sighed and went into one of the rooms. Frightening. He wasn't even sure if he could even see his own students as innocent anymore. They weren't any younger than the girls that had gone after Prince and Nan Gong Zui tonight. And… what had even happened to Kenshin? Ah… he can look after himself.

As Gui closed the door behind him, he unexpectedly got punched in the face.

"Your Highness!" he cried as he dropped the elf in surprise, more worried about that than the fact he'd been punched. "Are you okay?"

"What do you think you're doing, pervert?" Prince growled at him, standing back up unsteadily.

Gui was horrified. "Prince! No, it's not what you think! I had to get you away from those hungry wolves… I mean fangirls! You didn't see them. It was scary. And Kenshin disappeared. I think he figured he won so he left. Or… at least I hope that's what happened to him. Prince!" he clung to the hem of his shirt and got a boot in the chest for his trouble.

He looked up at Prince with watery eyes and was surprised when Prince burst out laughing and stepped off him, stumbling a little to one side when he lifted his foot.

"Why are you laughing?" Gui said in an injured voice.

"Your face looked so funny." Prince snorted into his hands as if he was trying to stifle himself.

"Ah…" Gui sighed and stood up. "Look, Prince, I think you should go to bed until it's time for you to wake up in real life. If you leave here you'll probably get in a fight and break something, and you know Yulian would not be happy about that. Besides, I don't want anything to happen to you." He added in a lower voice as he watched Prince sit in a chair and struggle with his boots. Prince let out a string of profanities at the uncooperative shoes.

Gui helped him pull off his boots. "There, that better?" he said brightly, smiling.

He fully expected to be punched in the face again, but instead, Prince just stared at him. He almost looked… upset? Why?

"What's the matter?" Gui said worriedly.

"Why do you look at me like that?" Prince said quietly. "Like I'm the most important thing in the world."

Gui smiled and said easily, "That's because you are the most important thing in the world to me, Your Highness."

Prince stood up, swaying, and immediately tripped over his boots. Gui caught and steadied him carefully.

"Don't try moving so fast," he said. "Lolidragon brought your stuff up here. Just get changed and go to bed. I'll check to make sure the barriers are still going strong and then I have to bed, too. You'll be awake in the real world before you know it."

Prince, holding onto Gui's arms for support, looked up at him confusedly. "You're not staying with me?"

Gui forced himself to look away from Prince's deep-red eyes. "I don't think that would be a good idea. I think you'd probably murder me later if I stayed in the same room with you."

"That's not true!" Prince said indignantly. "I wanted to stay with you guys on the tour, but I knew Wicked wouldn't like it. Then I was gonna stay with Kenshin and Sunshine since they aren't human, but then I remembered I couldn't exactly tell Wicked that, so…"

"You wanted to stay in our room?" This was so interesting that Gui couldn't help but look at him again.

"Yeah, I mean, how often do you get the chance to see two bishie's sleeping faces?"

Well, Wicked isn't here this time, so… Gui immediately quashed that thought.

"That's nice, but I really think it's better like this for now." Gui said, turning Prince around and pointing at the wardrobe. "Your stuff is there. Send me a PM if you need me."

As Gui turned to the door, he cursed his luck over and over. Of course he wanted to stay. He'd give almost anything to be able to stay. But it wasn't worth losing Prince's trust. He wanted a real relationship with him. He didn't deserve Prince if the only time he wanted Gui around was while completely smashed like this.

Gui heard a curse behind him and turned around by instinct, and his eyes nearly popped out again.

Prince had tried to pull off his button-up shirt over his head, and now it was stuck around his pointed ears. He wiggled around before it finally came off, leaving his hair looking wild.

"P-P-Prince," Gui said in a strangled voice. "You should wait until I leave before you start doing that…"

Prince tossed his shirt in the corner and looked at him over his shoulder vaguely. The dim light from the lantern outside on the street just highlighted the contours of his back, his shoulder blades moving smoothly under his skin as he raised a hand to smooth his hair.

"Don't, I like it like that," Gui breathed before he could stop himself.

Prince stopped and turned around to him. He started walking closer and Gui took a step back. His back hit the door and he couldn't go any further. Prince was looking at him way too intensely. His hair was as wild as his look.

"After everything, and all I have to do to scare you this much is look at you?" Prince smiled and stepped a little closer. "Maybe I'll try this instead of punching from now on."

"Punching I can deal with," Gui said in a trembling voice, his heart beating fast. "This… this just isn't fair."

Prince reached out and put his hands on Gui's chest. He stepped in and wrapped his arms around him.

"Unbelievable," he said. "You're shaking. You're literally shaking."

And of course his warm, lightly amused voice made a shiver pass over him all over again.

"And you look like you're in pain," Prince was inches from his face. "Are you being torn right now?"

"W-what are you–"

But before another thought could spark itself off in his brain, Prince kissed him and erased his thoughts, maybe every thought he'd ever had. It was wild and rough and sweet, everything he'd come to associate with the Blood Elf Prince. Gui put his arms around Prince and crushed him against himself. Prince grabbed handfuls of Gui's hair and pushed back, flattening him against the door. He felt completely dizzy. He wondered if maybe he really had had too much after all, because this had to be a dream.

Prince made an indignant, almost pained noise against his lips, almost as if he were as frustrated with Gui as Gui was with him. It was nearly a growl.

"Why are you so kind and goddamn attractive? God must really hate me," he said, face buried against Gui's neck with his hands still tangled in his hair. There was a real note of anguish in his voice.

"Prince," Gui said hesitantly. "What's the matter?" He'd never heard him sound like that before. And then there was the part about him being attractive…

Prince didn't answer, he just stood there, pinning Gui so that he couldn't move. Not that he wanted to. But Prince's breathing in his ear was making him a little lightheaded.

"Prince, I'm here," Gui said softly, wrapping his arms around him protectively. "If you want me, I am yours. It's too late for me. There's nothing else I can be except yours. Your friend, your lover, or your punching bag…" he cracked a smile, "no matter what else I may be, I'll always be yours first."

Prince unclenched his hands from Gui's hair and let them fall limply to his sides. He took a couple of steps back.

"Prince…?" Gui whispered. He started to panic slightly when Prince failed to answer again. He stepped up to meet him and wanted to grasp his shoulders, but thought better of it. "I-I'm sorry… I shouldn't have let all that… I just got… c-caught up…"

"You idiot,"

"What?" Gui blinked.

"How can you love someone you don't know anything about?" Prince looked up. His eyes were smoldering, and despite the seriousness of the situation, it made Gui's knees feel weak. He leaned in, the better to drink in Prince's scent.

"Tell me, then," he said, gently brushing Prince's hair out of his face. "Tell me all about you. Tell me your life's story if you want. Tell me everything. Or nothing. I told you before that I'll accept whatever you're comfortable with."

This close, Prince's eyes seemed so all-encompassing. They looked liquid in the low light, with the unfathomable thoughts behind them.

"I would very much like to kiss you again," Gui admitted. "But I'm having a moral quandary here, picking on someone so inebriated."

"As if a bard like you could take advantage of me," Prince said. "Who was it that was trembling a little while ago? I could take you on, even like this."

His eyes drifted down to Gui's lips and that was all it took. Gui closed the distance between them, a thrill ringing through his heart at having made the move first this time. That same swirling, wild, fringe-of-consciousness feeling came over him again, and again he compulsively held onto Prince tightly. Prince, however, seemed to be determined to prove his point. He grabbed Gui by the front of his shirt and took two large steps backward and turned them around, still locked together, pulling Gui around as if he weighed nothing. Gui felt gravity reverse itself suddenly and found himself pinned down on the bed.

"See?" Prince grinned.

Gui was rendered completely speechless for a moment. Anything he might have said seemed to implode before it could even be formed. All he knew was Prince's mischievous smile, messy white hair framing his face, the smooth lines of his bare shoulders, finely toned arms holding him down onto the bed. All of this was his entire universe. There really was no need for anything else.

"Wh…wh…wh…" Nope, no coherent words yet.

"I knew it, you can't do anything against me," Prince said with a laugh in his voice. "Your 'foolish' face is the funniest thing ever."

He leaned down and kissed Gui differently, slowly and more tenderly than before. Gui let out a longing moan and clutched at Prince's back. That kiss was hotter and longer than any he'd ever had before, and it was really proving to be a problem for his rational side.

Prince was searching for the hem of his shirt. He traced kisses down Gui's jaw and neck while doing so, and when he pulled it up part of the way, tugging as if to prompt Gui to remove it, Gui's breath hitched and he tried to bring himself back to his senses, with great difficulty.

"Prince," he said, breathing very fast. "I-I… this isn't right. I understand what you said before, and there is a great difference between our strengths, but that isn't all there is. You're not thinking clearly right now. Don't do something that you'll regret later."

"But I like seeing your reactions," Prince giggled.

"Listen to me," Gui held the sides of his face firmly to look in his eyes. "I know you. Whatever you may feel for me, you still need some time to work it out. How can I live with myself if I let you get into something you weren't completely sure about?"

Prince laid his head on Gui's chest and curled up beside him. "You always make things so difficult, Guiliastes."

"I make things difficult?" Gui laughed softly.

"Hmf," Prince said vaguely with his eyes closed.

Gui studied Prince's face more intently than he had any book. He needed to memorize this moment, to put in the treasure box of his most precious memories. If Prince chose not to forgive him for what had happened tonight, it could very well be the only chance to have a memory like this with him. The thought alone made Gui's heart hurt.

#1/2 prince #1/2 prince fanfiction #guiprince #guilan #this is an oldish fic but it's newly refurbished thanks to my mental tangents this weekend #some romance in the spirit of the holiday

2 notes · View notes