#and like that’s not even the only way you’ve shown her self-care deteriorate. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nelyoslegalteam · 27 days

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hello i'm here again! i saw your tags on the get to know your characters post and i'd love to hear you talk about murdoc!! (also gondolin campaign 😮 tell me more :DDD )

HIHIHIHIHI IM SO HAPPY YOU'RE IN MY INBOX THANK YOU FOR LOVING MY BOY YOU ARE A GIFT OF A PERSON ;w; i assume you don't mind if i answer these for murdoc then :0

What is the character’s go-to drink order? here's the thing: i think if murdoc is ordering, it's ale. just ale. murdoc is an alcohol snob, largely on account of being a hobbit AND specifically on account of his aunt being a brewer (and so therefore clearly HIS family's ale is the best), so it's an opportunity for him to be just a little bit showily snobbish and judgy and more knowledgeable about his choice of drink than the average patron, but it's not quite so personal to him as, say, tea would be. (murdoc never orders tea. from anywhere. he only drinks his own, or radagast's, or that of a few other trusted friends. tea is his craft. it's personal to him. he picks and dries and blends the herbs for his own brews. it's personal long before he even gets to brewing a cup, and there's meaning in just that act in and of itself already.) so, murdoc gets to be an alcohol snob in public, but it's a matter of showing off for fun. he'll scoff at ale from anywhere but his own inn, but he'll still order it and drink it. and enjoy it more than he puts on a show about.

What is their grooming routine? murdoc likes a long bath. murdoc likes to put a lot of effort into wrangling his hair in particular, when he has the time and effort in him for it. alone, at the inn, where he can rest and take breaks and manage things, shaving the back of his neck is very important to him (sensory comfort, and tied in a way to his sense of self). he doesn't like scents or anything of the sort, he just wants to feel... clean. put-together. both in the privacy and comfort of their respective homes, and while out on the road, letting ríros braid his hair for him becomes a very important part of murdoc's grooming routine. on a good day, it's a visible tie to someone he cares deeply for. on a bad day, it's accepting help with his sensory needs and energy levels, and allowing himself to be taken care of by someone he trusts.

What was their most expensive purchase/where does their disposable income go? oh, murdoc's cloak was ABSOLUTELY the most expensive singular thing he's ever purchased. it may not be real dragon scale, sure but. it's a fine fabric, and the faux scales are well crafted and gorgeous. it's luxurious and sturdy and him in every way. an item with presence. which, to the point, i do think murdoc is generally the sort of person who spends his disposable income on fine things to wear. having fun with and taking pride in his appearance is important to him, and he's financially comfortable enough for that bit of luxury.

Do they have any scars or tattoos? aside from the missing hand (extremely notable), and whatever assorted and unspecified scars he's picked up from adventuring? (which. he has. he's come close to dying before. he's got a few marks.) murdoc has a scar across his nose from some absolutely stupid shit he got up to as an utter hellion of a child. i think he probably fell and bashed his face open running to escape getting caught pulling a prank on farmer maggot or something like that. nothing angsty about it, just complete and utter childhood stupidity and rambunctiousness. something visible left on him from a time before he was overly concerned with responsibility, or duty of care, and entertaining his drive for adventure in much less consequential ways. (he’s also very freckled. i think it’s very adorable how much he freckles.)

What was the last time they cried, and under what circumstances? the last time i know for certain that murdoc cried, was after facing irmo. maybe not immediately. maybe much later, on the road home, having spilled the story to his companions and having thoroughly exhausted himself from hanging onto it all. but i'm sure he did cry. from anger at what was done to him, to his dreams, by a power larger than him, without any say of his own in it all. from all his internalization of himself as a weapon finally breaking over, from hearing that perception of himself lovingly rebuffed by the people who care about him. from fully and completely admitting that he's afraid of the person he's made himself in the face of the horrors, but that he would've hated the person he would have been for ignoring them. from exhaustion. from having to question his sense of self yet again. from a lot of things, really. you don't get personally chosen by a god and come away from it quite the same.

Are they an oldest, middle, youngest or only child? oh murdoc is an eldest sibling and it shows. maybe not by actual sibling birth order, but he was adopted by his uncles and aunt as a baby and very much raised as their eldest child. he's got two rascals of younger cousins, raised alongside him, to look out for. they're practically younger siblings from an actual family dynamics standpoint. and besides, he's got all the Eldest Child of being the brandybuck family heir apparent put on him. where else would the responsibility complex and the duty of care complex and the possessiveness over what's his and, most importantly, go-to instinct of sassing the literal servants of sauron have come from? This Man Is An Eldest Child And He Can Do This All Day <3

Describe the shoes they’re wearing. none. Those Feet Are Bare. and hairy. he DOES meticulously wash and brush his foot hair though. but listen. he's a hobbit. he's not FROM a culture that does shoes, and the one (1) time in his life ever that he had to wear them, his only takeaway from the experience is that they are a sensory nightmare that he will not be subjecting himself to under ANY circumstances.

Describe the place where they sleep. ooohhhh i think both at home in the inn and also to the greatest extent on the road possible, murdoc does cozy. i think his (+ his partner's) room at the inn is covered in like. throw pillows. nice big comfy sleeping pillows. lots of soft blankets. it's all very warm and inviting and kinda maximalist in a plush sort of way. i do think he cares about aesthetics and all his pillows and blankets look nice together, but everything is selected with comfort in mind. it's homey. it's warm. he's a hobbit. it's probably not particularly neat, but it's sort of charming in the way where it looks like a space that's meant to be curled up in. he probably accidentally leaves a few stray tea mugs about and this is his worst living space habit, but it adds to the charm as long as he remembers to actually keep up on putting them away (which. he does. he's just on top of it enough to make sure he has clean mugs to actually use for tea, but this may be the only reason he remembers). i think even on the road he'll bring as many blankets as is reasonable to carry and do his utmost not only to make his sleeping space, but the whole camp's, as cozy and welcoming as possible with whatever he has.

What is their favorite holiday? ohh see i don't know if i do know enough about specific hobbitish holidays offhand for this, but in general i do think murdoc is a holidays kind of person. anything sort of extrovert-oriented, where he can feast and dance and get drunk and just be around people, is very much his sort of thing. when he was growing up in the shire, any occasion where gandalf showed up with fireworks was an immediate favorite. for least favorite... i don't know how he feels about new year's (yule, in the hobbitish calendar). i don't think he hates it but. i think he's someone who lives with a bit of a sense of loss over who he was, or might have been, before his dreams and irmo and everything, and i think nostalgia-oriented celebrations grate just slightly up against that.

What objects do they always carry around with them? tea. lots of it. kept in his pockets. (he smells like it. it’s nice.) usually a particular brew (the flavor profile of which i imagine to be something like london fog) that he made for himself, which is very personal to him. a locket with his partner's portrait in it. an ornately carved matchbox, always full of matches, ready to light an arrow or for whatever else he may use his fire for. additionally, on the road: a jar in which he cultivates a toxic fungus, used for coating his weapons in tough battles. a set of his favorite cooking knives. a flask or two of his family’s ale, primarily used in his cooking, as ornate and pretty as all else he owns. (i will also give him that he most always is wearing jewelry, particularly his ruby necklace and earring set. the necklace in particular is important - usually maedhros resides in ríros’ sword, but the necklace is an ideal secondary vessel on the occasions that maedhros does have to remain where murdoc is, and murdoc has selected these pieces in maedhros’ colors for a reason).

as this has gotten LONG i will not try to do them for my new beloved tyelperëkko antar JUST yet. BUT @jaz-the-bard is planning to run a campaign set in gondolin in the first age and i am VERY excited for the character i have made. i’ve given them the oathsworn background. they’re going to be a loyal follower of maeglin, once he exists, but for NOW they’re a devotee of turgon. this is going to go great for them and cause no problems at all (lying).

#ALSO HI HI HI I SAW YOUR ELINYEL ANSWERS FOR THESE AND THEY MADE ME LOVE HER A LOT #man but i DO have some feelings about her before and during the war #like i know she’s your BBEG but. something about going from sleeping in a room full of trinkets and things her best friend gifted to her.#to just. not even sleeping. never mind in a room surrounded by reminders of people who care for her just. trancing. while riding.#something about that shift makes me INTENSELY sad for her??????#and like that’s not even the only way you’ve shown her self-care deteriorate.#not spending money on herself. not keeping up her hobbies or spending any more time than necessary on so much as taking a bath.#her shoes *look* fine but are being held up from disrepair through magic #something about her shoes feels like it’s getting SO much at Her. MAN.#also youngest but heir?? :0 #that’s a FASCINATING dynamic. i want you to elaborate. please. what happened there.#anyhow i love elinyel a lot!!!!!!!#and thank you for loving murdoc thank you for giving me a chance to answer these!!! :0 #if i do them later for antar of gondolin campaign would you want to see? :0 #aaaaaaa <33333 #beloved mutual is beloved!!!!!!!!#also #i do feel like some important context for like. the way murdoc connects to his appearance + grooming routine is. he’s trans.#cannot stress that enough #mirkwood campaign #nelyo askbox

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dutchdread · 3 years

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Bruh, we don't want to hear about your negative views about cleriths. Cloud loves Aerith and he always has. He lives in her church because he loves her. He thought of Aerith a lot in OG , On the Way to A Smile, and AC. He went to live in her church. Why tf would he go live in her church if it wasn't for Aerith? There are millions of places he could've gone but he chose the church. You don't have to believe our way of thinking if you don't want to, but don't tag clerith in your posts.

Thanks for your question. I think it's important to have these conversations so we can clear up these misunderstandings. Clouds motivations have been well documented so it's unfortunate that large swaths of the fandom seemingly are still in the dark about something that has been known for quite a long time, and I blame lack of communication. Before I answer your question though I'd like to address the style of it, since I find it amusing that in response to my article concerning productive conversation styles you not only used one of the styles I described, but even the same exact argument. This is a nice confirmation for me that I am right on the money. In my article, I said that the "dishonest inquiry" is the Clerith conversation style of choice. The example I gave was as follows:

The dishonest inquiry: “Why don’t you admit that Clouds actions in AC show that he doesn’t love Tifa?”

You mirrored this approach by saying "Why tf would he go live in her church if it wasn't for Aerith?". The defining characteristic of the dishonest inquiry is that the question isn't asked with the goal of seeking clarification, but as an offensive tactic meant to attack the others position, you're not trying to evaluate your position, you're trying to get others to re-evaluate their position under the guise of a question. If we look at the rest of your post we can see the indicators I described for someone who has reached the last stage of the debate style. "Cloud loves Aerith and he always has. He lives in her church because he loves her". As I noted in my article:

If assertions are backed up, they are backed up with other assertions designed to dissuade rebuttals, rather than investigating veracity.

This "argument" had no actual arguments, it was a meaningless assertion. Stating that you are correct in an attempt to avoid having to actual show that you're correct. "Cloud loves Aerith and he always has. He lives in her church because he loves her": This is what you're trying to prove, you can't state what you're trying to prove as your starting premise.

If you're honestly interested in learning more about FFVII then leave out the baseless assertions, they literally just waste peoples time and makes them less willing to engage with you.

If I had to rephrase your question in a way that's more inviting for a productive discussion it would be something like this:

"Why do you believe Cloud chose Aeriths Church as his hiding place in AC? He thinks about Aerith a lot, what do you think the reason is for that if it's not love?".

The answer to this is pretty simple of course, it's been restated several times, this is not something that is some grand mystery, it's not even an aspect of FFVII that's particularly ambiguous. The reason he stays in Aeriths church is the same reason he's seen lingering at Zacks "grave", it's guilt. As stated in the 10th anniversary ultimania, and several other times:

when Cloud contracts Geostigma he disappears. Behind these actions lies feelings of guilt towards his past failure to protect people who were important to him

While this is an element of the story that has been explicitly confirmed through ultimanias and quotes, this is not an element of the story that was ever in any way unclear, its a direct continuation of Clouds character arc in FFVII. Infact, Clouds mental health issues are the central part of the fake persona storyarc, and is arguably the core of the story. The rough order of events shown in FFVII, on the way to a smile, and Advent children (and also CC) concerning Clouds mental health is as follows. 1: Cloud as a boy want to protect Tifa. 2: Cloud fails to protect Tifa. 3: Cloud and townspeople blame Cloud for Tifas injuries. 4: Cloud internalizes this and beats himself up over his failure to protect Tifa. He develops a fear of failure. 5: Cloud starts acting up, starts wanting to prove himself, and decides to join Soldier to impress Tifa. 6: Cloud fails to get into Soldier, develops an inferiority complex. 7: Cloud is too ashamed of his failure to face Tifa. 8: Cloud fails to save his mother. 9: Cloud fails to save Nibleheim. 10: Cloud fails to save Tifa, again. 11: Cloud fails to save Zack. 12: Cloud develops a soldier alter ego that is everything that he isn't, as a defense mechanism. He hides from his own weakness. 13: Even as a soldier, Cloud fails to save Aerith. 14: Cloud regains his memories in the lifestream, and discovers he did fulfill his promise to come save Tifa. Here we basically end FFVII, and go into on the way to a smile. At this point Cloud has overcome the alien parasite messing with his mind by establishing a stronger sense of who he is. However, now that he's lost his fake soldier defense mechanism he's forced to deal with the past. His past failures haven't been fixed, he doesn't suddenly think he's a great person now, he simply can no longer use his fake persona to hide from his own weakness, and is forced to confront it. 15: Cloud still blames his own weakness for the deaths of Aerith and Zack, he thinks that he needs to atone for his sins, and thinks that the only way to do this is through living* 16: Cloud starts living with Tifa and experiences happiness and peace for the first time in his adult life.** 17: Cloud develops cherophobia and survivors guilt. He feels ashamed for being alive and happy while Aerith and Zack are dead because of him.*** 18: Clouds mental health deteriorates because of these feelings.**** 19: Cloud finds Denzel and sees him as a way to atone, having found a pathway to redemption, Clouds situation improves.***** 20: Cloud is unable to save Denzel from geostigma, and contracts it himself. 21: Clouds mental health worsens again, he failed again, he is unable to save Denzel, he is even unable to save himself, he won't be able to atone for his sins through living. He potentially brought an infectious disease into the house and as a result of his actions Tifa and Marlene will now lose him. 22: Depressed and ashamed, Cloud runs away. He thinks Tifa and Marlene are better off without him, he doesn't want them to see him waste away and die, he feels like he doesn't deserve to be happy and should instead die alone, Etc. Classic depression. (Some quotes concerning the *** are at the bottom of the article)

As for why he thinks about Aerith and Zack a lot, and hangs around the places that are connected with them, what else do you expect? Of course he's thinking about them, they're the people he failed, they're DEAD because of him. Cloud is a caring man, he beats himself up over it, of course he'd be thinking about them. And where else would a man wallowing in guilt and self-pity go than to those places? But the important thing to remember is that none of this is supposed to be seen as romantic. It's supposed to be viewed as sad and negative. Every internal character arc has something to overcome and this is what Cloud has to overcome in Advent children.****** Tifa to Cloud: "have we lost to our memories?" Cloud to Sephiroth: "Stay where you belong, in my memories" A well written story has internal and external obstacles to overcome, and ties the two together. In the case of advent children, the return of Sephiroth is the physical representation of Clouds internal character arc, which is that he should stop living in the past, and should move on. The past here isn't a positive thing he wants to get back to, Clouds past has always been a thing he's ran away from, but then is forced to accept. The past in Clouds case is a bad thing, his failures, and is something he should stop dwelling on. If you've ever seen the lion king, this resembles the scene where Rafiki hits Simba with a stick. "What does it matter, it's in the past", "yeah but it still hurts", "Oh Yes, the past can hurt, but the way I see it you can either run from it, or learn from it".

When Cloud returned to his normal self, he stopped running from the past, but as a result, he started dwelling in it. That's what he's doing in Aeriths church; dwelling in misery.

If we juxtapose Aeriths church with the 7th heaven, we can start to see where peoples misunderstandings are taking place. When some people look at the events of ACC they think that 7th heaven is a place of sadness, which Cloud leaves to be happy at Aeriths church, the place of happiness. The "have we lost to our memories" is then seen as a confirmation of this and that the memory, which they think corresponds to Aerith, is better than life with Tifa. This character arc then concludes with Cloud being happy by finally leaving Tifa behind, and riding off in the sun-set in search of Aerith at the end of the movie. But this interpretation falls apart as soon as you apply context to it, both narratively, and factually, it doesn't fit with with developer quotes, as well as the fundamental story themes of FFVII. 1: If 7th Heaven/Tifa is a place of sadness, then why has Cloud been consistently quoted to experience happiness there? 2: If 7th Heaven/Tifa is a place of sadness, and Cloud leaves at the end of the movie, then why has it been stated to be his promised land, aka, his land of supreme happiness (the reason it's literally called 7th heaven), and why is he stated to return there? ******* 3: If Clouds "memories" are positive, why is the plotarc resolved by Cloud telling the villain to "stay there"? 4: If Cloud is happy at the church, why is he living in self-deprecating squalor? 5: If Cloud loved Aerith and thought Denzel was sent to him by her, why did he abandon him? 6: Do you really think SE would write a story about a "hero" whose main emotional hurdle concerning the past comes down to. "I am sick of the girl I am with, I prefer the one that is dead, so I will get over the past by letting go of the girl I am with, as well as my adoptive children, to go chase the dead girl"? 7: Don't you think this would do Tifas character a tremendous disservice and do you think SE would be that preferential in their treatment? I could go on, but I think the point is clear. While the "Aeriths church is a happy place" interpretation is semi-coherent when looked at in isolation, it becomes exceedingly bizarre as soon as you place it in context. As I am fond of saying, this is not a matter of personal interpretation, it's a matter of lying to yourself vs not lying to yourself. I also suspect that this is the reason why SE changed the ending to advent Children, because people were misinterpreting it in this bizarre way, so they made it more in your face. In context, the following interpretation is much more fitting. Aeriths church is a place of sadness that Cloud runs to because of his guilt and depression. The "memories" line refers to Cloud dwelling on his past mistakes, as evidenced by his constant quotes about needing forgiveness. The character arc of moving on from the past is then resolved when he forgives himself, and as a result, defeats sephiroth, the metaphorical demon of his past. This allows him to return to his place of joy, his promised land, the 7th heaven, with a more positive outlook on the past. Instead of tarnishing Aerith and Zacks memories by wallowing in the past he instead moves on from it, thereby allowing it to become beautiful, which is represented by him planting Aeriths flowers on Zacks grave, and placing Zacks sword in the church. Instead of Zacks grave being the place where Zack died, it is now the place where a hero was born. Cloud has moved on, he has let his mistakes go, and has learned to come to terms with himself. I think it's hard to argue that this version of events is much less shallow, and much more meaningful than the story of a lovesick guy who abandons his partner and adoptive kids to go chase after a dead girl, but that's just me, what's more important is that it's the only version of events that's corroborated by the evidence. Thanks for the question. __________________________________________________

Corroborating quotes (not comprehensive)

* from case of Tifa: "“I’m going to live. I think that’s the only way I can be forgiven. All sorts of things…"

** Nojima in AC prologue: "“Cloud never had a candid personality to begin with, and although he started living with Tifa and even started working, he obtained a peaceful livinghe’s never experienced before, and this conversely made him anxious. And in the midst of this he contracts Geostigma himself, and rather than being able to protect the people dear to him, he instead was forced to face his own death, and so ran away.” (among other quotes)

*** 10th anniversary ultimania: "when Cloud contracts Geostigma he disappears. Behind these actions lies feelings of guilt towards his past failure to protect people who were important to him"

Aeriths 10th anniversary profile : Aerith still lives on in the hearts of her friends who saved the planet. And in particular to Cloud, as a symbol of his failure to having being unable protect those dear to him, she was a major factor in causing him to close himself off. -Aerith’s 10th anniversay profile.

And more, really this is reiterated constantly.

**** From case of Tifa: "During that time, it was Marlene who noticed a change in Cloud. She told Tifa how Cloud would sometimes space out and not listen to her.

Transporting mail around the world meant he was traveling around his past too. She knew that Cloud was in great pain because he couldn’t protect Aerith. Cloud was trying to overcome that and live on. But, going back to the place where he parted from Aerith might mean that his sorrow and regret was going to tear his heart again.

It was night, and they had closed the bar. Cloud was drinking alcohol even though he rarely did. He drained his glass. Tifa thought about it before going over and filling his glass.

***** From case of Tifa: "Tifa wondered if they became a real family after Denzel appeared. Cloud was clearly taking less jobs. At night, he would always make sure he had time to spend with the children. The silly little conversations he had with Tifa were also back."

****** Reunion files, page 58: "As long as Cloud blames himself for Aerith’s death, he won’t be able to move on with his life. One of the first ideas we had for Advent Children was to have Cloud overcome and resolve that immense feeling of guilt. For Cloud, no one other than Aerith can solve that problem for him."

- Takahiro Sakurai pg. 15 reunion files: After Cloud was told, “Which is it? A memory or us?: by Tifa, he tells Sephiroth, “Stay where you belong. In my memories,” just before he defeats him. I think Cloud finally becomes free at this moment. Deep down, Cloud knew that he shouldn’t be so hard on himself, but at the same time he couldn’t let go of those feelings of guilt for what happened to Aerith and Zack, or the thought that he could never forgive himself for it. But then his companions made him feel better by telling him to let go. ******* "The place where he awakens—- That is Cloud’s Promised Land As he sleeps, Cloud hears two voices. The voices of two people very dear to him, who are no longer with him. Playfully and kindly, they give him a message: he doesn’t belong here yet. When he awakes, there was his friends. There were the children, freed from their fatal illness. Tifa and Marlene, and Denzel asking for Cloud to heal his Geostigma— his family were waiting. Engulfed in celebration, he realizes where he is meant to live."

"Aerith lends her power to the people suffering from Geostigma in Edge, and personally provides for Cloud’s recovery. Geostigma is cured. Cloud returns to Tifa and the children."

- FFVII 10th Anniversary Ultimania Complete Timeline

#Cloti #FFVII #ffvii remake #cloud strife #advent children

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moxfirefly · 4 years

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74 prompt and 57 kink: with The turtle of your choice (I’ll let you choose). Show me what love can be like and knowing someone is listening

Interesting, let’s see how we combine these two. So just cause I wanna try it out with him and since I haven’t gotten a request for him in a hot minute, I’m going with Mikey 👌

Rated Explicit (18+ only)

Breaks were needed and very much welcomed. Fighting night in and night out wasn’t necessarily a lifestyle that left much for self care and rest. The idea for a break had been voiced by April and Casey had stepped up to offer a great place.

The family cabin had been passed down to Casey a few years ago, he hadn’t gone up to the place in a year. It seemed perfect for overtired and overworked family. A getaway for a few days to rest and recover. The group chat bombarded you no less, everyone begging you to join in for the weekend.

You smiled down at the chain of messages but you mostly obliged when Michelangelo had texted you in private. The whole crime fighting gig had placed some pressure on the relationship, mostly due to the fact that Mikey would show up so bruised up or tired or at other times, not show up at all. You tried not to worry and you did a fairly good job at it but you missed him. You missed so much about him.

Some maneuvering around work you managed to lock in the few days off to disappear up to Casey’s cabin with the rest of the guys. Upon arriving the cold greeted you first than April. Winter was approaching and soon enough it would be too umberable to deal just about any common activity.

A last hurrah felt right. Seeing Mikey and spending time with him did too. Being around family, your chosen family.

“Tell me there’s a fire already starting in there” You wrapped your arms around April as she laughed. “Yeah Casey already flexed his lumberjack ways for me, fires just started” You shivered and thanked her before scurrying inside.

The warmth hit you first.

Then Mikey’s body connecting with yours for a tight hug.

It felt like ages since that, too long for you and the feel of those strong arms around you melted every negative thought from you.

A resounding ‘Angel!’ was all you caught before being picked up and held tightly by Mikey. A sigh of relief left him and you could also feel the tension melt from his body. “I missed you so much” Mikey planted a kiss on your neck, the press of his lips there making your skin breakout in goosebumps. It had been too long and it embarrassed you how such a simple kiss could do that to you.

Once back on your feet you took him in. There was still evidence of lethargy in his eyes, as if he hadn’t been sleeping too well. Some already healed bruises here and there but nevertheless that excitable puppy dog energy of his was there and it all centered around you.

Most of the afternoon was spent settling in, you and Mikey had gotten a room for the two of you adjacent to where Casey and April would be sleeping. Another smaller room would house Raphael while Donnie and Leo would crash in the living room area close to the fireplace.

Between dinner preparations, some drinks, the majority of the time was spent relaxing and just playing all sorts of card games. You and Mikey had been glued together for the entire evening. In some form or way he had been touching you and you as well towards him. His presence had instantly healed so much of your worries and frustrations and despite the distance it hadn’t deteriorated the relationship.

Midnight rolled by and by 2am you and Mikey were in the cozy room you’d be spending the next few days in. The dark expanse of forest looked beautiful in the night, you sat at the window watching the branches rustle and the warm mug of hot chocolate kept you from other thoughts. It seemed rather stupid to feel a level of nervousness at finally having a moment alone with Mikey and that accompanied by a room even more so. Your situation was tricky, given you had roommates and Mikey’s ever escalating super hero activities alongside his brothers. Creativity in spots was a speciality of his and on the rare occasions the Lair was untenanted for the night, well you could indulge more comfortably.

He had walked in after going to bother Raph, his own admission, and upon returning he closed the door and locked it. The click made you aware that there was really nothing or no one to interrupt for the time being. You opted for some idle chat to not feel so nervous. “Your eye’s looking better” You took a sip from your mug. Mikey ran a digit across the purple-ish bruise that was started to fade. “Oh, um yeah, gotta keep the baby blues safe ya know” He smiled as approached you. You smiled cupping his cheek and running your thumb below his bruise. “First thing I noticed” Your words held comfort.

“Noticed what?” Mikey was enamored with the physical affection, he hardly could get enough on a regular day. “Your eyes, they were just so blue” It was true no less, the memory of that night lived in Mikey’s head on loop. You hadn’t screamed, you hadn’t called him hurtful names. When he had saved you from a muggin you honest to god had just thanked him. The situation was bizarre no less and it was shocking to see your hero but you had sensed zero danger from his behalf.

From that moment on, being with Michelangelo was the safest you had ever felt. “Could’ve sworn it was the guns” He chuckled when you gripped his arm and squeezed. “That was second, can’t lie” The two of you remained there, comfortably close but a thin tension that throbbed. You turned to face him while still seated at the window. Your eyes mapped out every inch of him. The hand at his arm pressed at the middle of his plastron, Mikey swallowed. He hasn’t felt that hand touch him with so much intimacy in a while. “I missed you angel” He placed his hand a top yours. You bit your lip and looked up at him, your eyes spoke more than you could ever and Mikey knew the language by heart.

So he kissed you. He kissed you with a tenderness that reminded you of the first time the two of you had kissed. His lips had never felt better, the plump thickness to them enveloping yours so neatly you moaned. That seemed to hit him hard in the gut, the way his hands traveled to your waist and held you firmly. You stood up still mid kissing him and pushed the kiss into something more firm.

Foreheads pressed you felt his hands grip the hem of your sweater and lift. Those blue eyes drank in the sight of his most priced possessions. “Missed you so much” He was breathless as you unlooped the strings of his sweats. There was something about this particular area that always fascinated you, the change in skin and color, the path leading to an intimate area. You kissed his neck, fingers running across the slit that housed his member, the pressure strong and the sensitivity making his knees jelly. “Do you...?” Mikey couldn’t finish asking as you already nodded your consent.

You gripped his hand, half kicking off your pants when he didn’t move. “Mikey?” You looked at him, eyes so bright and wanting and he couldn’t help but greedily admire it. Admire you and want you so much. He pulled you back towards him and embraced you. The intimacy gutted you, the overwhelming need that accompanied Mikey to just hold you close and feel you. Your arms were around his neck instantly and the two of you stayed like that.

“You’ve shown me what love can feel like.” It was soft and mumbled against your shoulder. Your smile was kind even as you stood back and held his face in your hands. “And so have you” The honesty flowed freely and Mikey beamed. “C’mere girl, I’ve missed you like crazy” You allowed him to pick you up and toss you on the bed, the fit of giggles only egging him on.

While the privacy was here, it sure didn’t mean that the entire cabin wasn’t occupied and your closest neighbors were in fact Casey and April. A flush of embarrassment hit you but soon enough Mikey had made his decent to his second favorite possession of yours. The feel of that mouth finally at your core left you in a daze. Mikey’s ability when it came to eating you out was something you never thought could exist and with each swirl and flick of his tongue it was evident that keeping quiet would not be a possibility. Especially when he begged to hear you, spoken against your clit with the warmth of his breath so close. You tried to cover your mouth but the feel of one thick digit entering you was your undoing. You’re sure and Mikey’s sure that the neighbors defenatly heard that.

There was a pride in that deep inside of Mikey. The idea of claiming you and having others know. For now he paid no mind especially when he buried himself inside of you and moaned long and deep. This never stopped being incredible, it’s exactly why he was always mesmerized by seeing your joined bodies. The contrast of skin color, the thickness of his memeber stretching you and causing you to cry out. Mikey could’ve cum like that just watching. “You’re so beautiful babe” He groaned thrusting into you. “Missed the fuck out of this, out of you” He leaned forward, engulfing himself around you, mouth at your neck. “Baby I want you to cream yourself all over me” The lewd words never seized to embarrass you, half the time Mikey barely would utter a ‘damn’ but this was the effect you had on him.

The bed protested and the headboards thumping was indicative of the activities going on. The most you could do was avoid Casey and April’s gazes at breakfast tomorrow. Right now you were, for lack of a better term, getting dicked down by your boyfriend after a dry spell. “Fuck fuck, oh fuck!” You gripped Mikey’s sides before letting your hands run towards his rear. Being filled to the brim and having your boyfriend absolutely spill filth into your ear was exactly the things you needed. “Yeah come on, for me baby, gonna do it for me? Gimme a show” Mikey sucked a bruise onto your neck and his quickening pace had your hand scrambling for your clit. “Yesss fuck” Mikey watched, hips trying not to loose the rhythm he knew would send you off.

You came with a loud moan that had Mikey’s name wrapped around it. If everyone heard it was at the bottom list of your priorities. Riding this high was top on the list and feeling Mikey cum with a series of ‘fucks’ and your name was all you need to add to your high. You ran a soothing hand down his shell, feeling him shiver with the intensity of his release. Each kiss placed on his cheek a testament to your adoration. Mikey found your lips in the haze of it all, and lazily kissed you back.

#tmnt bayverse #tmnt michelangelo x female reader #michelangelo tmnt #tmnt michelangelo x reader #tmnt mikey #tmnt michelangelo #michelangelo x reader #mikey x reader #Michelangelo #Mikey #ns*w #ask #requested oneshot #writing prompt #tmntspidergirl

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rosyfingereddawnn · 3 years

Text

only the black rose (chapter 8)

pairing: jimmy page x layla porter (oc)

warnings: big nsfw warning, drinking, jimmy being himself, fluff

words: 3.6k

summary: in the blink of an eye, it’s 1975 and layla’s suddenly joining led zeppelin for their north american tour. throughout the chaos, the band take a liking to her, she builds friendships with the boys, and love blossoms. but all good things must come to an end.

author’s note: so. layla’s a freak in the... well... not necessarily the sheets, i guess? more stressy hands because they're my weakness, and just... please savour the last bit of happiness you get here. that is all. (two more chappies to go!!!) hope you enjoy :) feedback as always is so very welcome!

masterlist

playlist

chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7

———

As she’s checking over the stage, ensuring the lights and speakers are set to do their job, Layla’s thoughts roam. After the chaos at the hotel pool, while everyone was asleep, Layla had been anything but. Her tossing and turning had disturbed Jimmy, who had pulled her further into his arms with a tired grunt. She lay there for another hour, her conversation with Jonesy running through her mind over and over. It was obvious she’d have to go back to her own time, and she missed her friends. She missed her mom. She missed everything.

Layla couldn't help, though, but think that maybe she didn’t want to leave.

She had made friends that meant the world to her, and… she’d found Jimmy. The guitarist had changed her life, and had shown her what it meant to love. She’s falling for him, and it’s not long before she hits the ground. It’ll be worth it, she thinks, for someone like him. Jimmy Page is a rare gem, precious, and she knows that she would spend her life trying to find her way back to him.

A throat clears from behind her, and, looking over her shoulder, Layla spots Peter Grant standing a few feet away. Soft smile resting upon his lips, he steps closer, placing a large hand on Layla’s shoulder.

“Layla, I trust everything’s going well?”

“Yep! Lights and sound are looking good, and the stage is set up. Anything else you need me to do?”

“No, this is perfect, dear,” Peter shakes his head, smile morphing into a smirk as he continues. “Though, you’ve been requested elsewhere. Follow me, Layla.” Leading her through the venue, Peter stops in front of a closed door, a laminated sign next to it reading, “Dressing Room: Led Zeppelin”. Turning to Layla, he holds out an arm, beckoning her to take it.

“Shall we?”

“We shall, Peter.”

Arm in arm, they walk into the room. Robert, lying elegantly across the comfortable couch pressed against the wall, has his eyes closed. He hasn’t thrown up yet, but his voice is hoarse, and he has a terrible cough. Knowing these boys as well as she does, Layla suspects that nothing will bring them down. The show must go on, after all. Bonzo is next to him, Robert’s feet in his lap. The drummer speaks quietly to the sick man, who answers in the voice of a 20-year smoker. Jonesy speaks in hushed tones to Jimmy, eyebrows pinched in worry. Jimmy, Layla realizes, has his finger in a bowl of what looks to be ice water, if the cubes of ice scattered across the table are anything to go by. From the doorway, Layla can’t hear what’s being said, but by the downwards tilt of Jonesy’s lips, she can assume Jimmy’s stubbornness is on full display again. Her entrance with Peter hadn’t been noticed, until Robert’s eyes open to slits and he sits up, a smile breaking out on his face.

“Peter! Ah, look, if it isn’t my favourite little dove…”

“Hey, Robert. How are you feeling?”

“Better, better,” Robert smiles, and stands up to pull Layla into a hug, hands splayed across her back. “All thanks to you, Layla. Seriously, thank you for taking care of me.”

Layla grins in response, waving at Bonzo as she passes. He lifts up a hand, as if to splash the woman, and her face lights up, a giggle flying out past her lips. Layla walks over to Jonesy, and he gives her an uncertain look, beckoning her closer. Leaning close, he whispers into the woman’s ear, a worried glance at the guitarist beside him following.

“He was in a lot of pain, even with the meds, so he, uh… found a bottle of Jack’s and… Layla, he won’t listen.”

As if on cue, Jimmy takes a pull from the large bottle of whiskey that rested next to him on the table. Layla hadn’t noticed it, walking in, but it stuck out like a sore thumb now.

“Hey, petal,” Jimmy slurs slightly, bottle in hand as he sends the woman a lazy smile. Injured finger in plain view now, Layla can see how the nail is completely black, the skin around it still dyed purple from the force applied to it. Layla shakes her head, eyes downcast, as she walks closer to Jimmy. She grasps the bottle of alcohol in his hand, replacing it with her own, a warm palm meeting his.

“Jimmy… you can’t just…” Layla drifts off, not wanting to argue with him this close to showtime. They can always talk about this later, after all. Jimmy, noticing her internal battle even through his alcohol-fueled haze, pulls her into his lap. Jonesy, confident that Jimmy is in good hands, nods at Layla before giving the couple a moment to themselves. Jimmy brings a finger to the apple of Layla’s cheek, stroking it almost hesitantly, as though she would break under a stronger touch. Layla’s eyes, once meeting his, drift to his plump, pink lips. They shine in the artificial light, as he swipes his tongue across to wet them.

“Layla,” Jimmy starts, snapping her out of her trance. Her eyes meet his, and he smirks at her dilated pupils. She knew he had caught her staring, she wasn’t exactly subtle about it. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Shoot.”

“What is the meaning of life? Please, answer seriously. This is important.”

“Jimmy, I didn’t peg you as someone who indulges in drunk philosophical discussions.”

Jimmy huffs a sigh, and leans in closer, pressing a quick kiss against her lips. Pulling back, he looks at their joined hands, before meeting her eye once more.

“Humour me.”

“Well—”

Before she could answer, Peter floats back into the room, telling the boys to follow him backstage. It’s showtime, and Layla doesn’t want her guitarist to leave yet. Jimmy looks at her expectantly, green eyes searching her face as though the answer to his question was written in the curve of her lips.

“It’s okay, Jimmy,” she says, squeezing the hand in hers, passing courage from one to the other. “We can continue this after the show.”

Jimmy nods, and releases her hand slowly, not wanting to break the contact. Layla hops out of his lap, and helps him stand. Her lips meet his in a soft kiss, as she presses their foreheads together. Their eyelashes flutter against each other, and the scent of citrus, tobacco and pine was ever-present, invading all of Layla’s senses. Jimmy pulls away first, and walks to the door, glancing back at her over his shoulder. She smiles at him, adrift in the empty dressing room, and he smiles back, walking out the door.

“Good luck, angel.” Layla whispers, voice swallowed up by the silence of the deserted dressing room.

Making her way to the familiar lip of the backstage area, Layla’s hands wring together, her lips bitten red. Robert hadn’t sounded well at all earlier, and Jimmy… It seemed like he was deteriorating right before her eyes. The mixture of codeine and Jack Daniels killed the pain, sure, but he was no longer the sharp, pragmatic man she was falling for. He was too caught up in the burn of the drink down his throat, a way to forget the agony rushing through his hand like a current. Bringing her attention back to the stage, she spots the boys, who share a loaded glance. Robert takes a deep breath, and launches right in. ‘Rock and Roll’ passes without a hitch, save for some voice cracks. If anything though, they add to the authentic performance, the crowd electric as usual. ‘Sick Again’ stuns, followed by ‘Over the Hills and Far Away’, and all is well, until ‘How Many More Times’ rolls around.

It was small. Insignificant, really. If Layla hadn’t been searching Jimmy’s face, entranced by the way his brow furrowed as he got lost in the music, she wouldn't have noticed. Breaking apart from the rest of the band to complete a complicated lick, Jimmy’s fingers trip up on the fretboard. To the audience, the only consequence is a slight dead note in the midst of heavenly riffs. Gazing over at Jimmy, however, Layla could see the discomfort in the downwards tilt of his lips, and the pain stiffening his shoulders. She could see the anger flaming in his dark eyes. Jimmy recovers well, delivering attack after attack, though his solos, from that point on, tended to go a little off-track. Whether from nerves or self-doubt, Layla didn't know. But she knows him. She knows the guitarist will let it cloud the entire night. She knows he’s gonna pick the show apart, minute after exhilarating minute, looking for the smallest flaw. Layla knows that she’ll be there for him through it all.

No matter what.

----------

With a hoarse thank you and a flourish directed at the audience, Robert finally leads the band off-stage to voltaic cheers. Robert, ecstatic as ever during the concert, seems to deflate the second he gets off. With a nod and a soft smile at Layla, he disappears into the depths of the backstage area. Jonesy and Bonzo pass by with tight-lipped smiles, clapping her on the shoulder as they follow Robert. Jimmy is the last to appear, and the reason for the rhythm section’s warning glances becomes apparent immediately.

Jimmy scowls as he approaches, eyes glassy, as though she were looking into a clear stream. Layla can see herself reflected in them; can see the worry reflected in her own gaze. Slipping a hand around his bicep, she steers Jimmy into a corner. He refuses to look at her, even as her hand tilts his face upwards softly.

“Jimmy, love, that was—”

“Shit.”

“No, not at all,” Layla steps closer, a hand finding the familiar spot on his cheek. “It was a great show. You saw the audience, Jim. They loved you guys!”

“It was shit, and everyone knows it. If I could just—”

“Jimmy, come on…”

“—be good enough, this would have gone differently.”

Layla’s breath catches, eyes as wide as saucers as she steps closer to the guitarist, who turns away. His gaze at the floor never wavers as he paces, muttering to himself.

“Jimmy, look at me,” Layla stops him in his tracks with a hand at his back. His shoulders heave with deep breaths as he tries to calm himself down. “You played a good gig. It doesn’t matter if you missed a note or two. You came to play a great show, and you did.”

“But it isn't enough. These people came here for an extraordinary show and we couldn't deliver. I couldn't deliver, and—”

“Hey—”

“—if my finger wasn’t broken, we would have been as good as we’ve always been. This is my fault.”

“Jimmy, this isn’t on you. You did nothing wrong.”

Jimmy’s hands fly up to land in his hair, as he pulls at it almost unconsciously. Layla grips his cheek lightly, as the other hand comes to rest at a thin wrist, pulling it away from the dark locks it had latched onto. Jimmy averts his eyes from the woman’s earnest gaze and turns his back once more, treading a hole in the wooden floor of the backstage area. Layla’s palm rubs soft circles into the fabric of his cardigan, patches of whispering dandelions catching on her fingers. From her place behind him, she can see the way he’s beating a fist into the palm of his injured hand repeatedly, perhaps a way to atone for a mistake that hasn’t been committed.

“I fucked up this tour. It’s my fault. I can’t do everything I know I can do, and that’s on me. I just…”

“Jimmy…”

“I can’t do this anymore!”

Layla shrinks back slightly at the exclamation form the man, who is shaking like a leaf. His head drops, long hair hiding his face once again. Recovering quickly, she spins him around carefully to face her. Hands cupping his cheeks, she presses her lips to his. His eyes flutter closed and he immediately reciprocates, a hand pressed to Layla's hips; his new favourite spot for them. Jimmy lets out a whine of pleasure, and Layla pulls away, looking into his tired eyes.

“Jimmy, listen to me. You did play well. I am so, so proud of you. Okay?”

“...Okay. I’ll… work on trying to believe you.”

“That’s all I can ask for.”

If Layla sees the sparkle and shine of tears on the man’s cheeks, she doesn't mention it as she grabs his hand, leading him to an empty room, locking the door immediately.

Finally away from prying eyes, Layla unfurls the guitarist’s hands from their clenched position, bringing the injured one up near her mouth. Gazing up at him, eyes shining in the dim light of the room, she presses a chaste kiss to each finger, slowing as she reaches the one painted shades of purple and black and blue. Jimmy nods, exhale shaky, and she presses the softest of kisses to the tip, hoping to cause pleasure rather than pain.

Jimmy’s hands slide lower from their place on her hips to cup her bum lightly, in case she was uncomfortable and wanted to slip out of his grasp. Her lips find his again as he pushes her against the large table in the middle of the room. Layla lets out a whimper, swallowed by the mouth against hers, as Jimmy’s tongue laps at her bottom lip, asking for entrance. He’s always been soft with her, but this new side of the dark-haired guitarist excited her. The kiss was over as soon as it began, Jimmy pulling away to stare at her, close enough still that their noses touched.

“Petal, I… We were gonna take it slow, and we will, but if you're ready…”

“I’m ready.”

Jimmy smiles, crashing his lips against her quickly, passionately. Pulling back once more, Jimmy smirks as Layla chases the high the feel of his lips gave her. Pressing into his space again, she frowns, which makes Jimmy chuckle. Layla’s hand reaches up, twisting in his hair.

“Angel,” Layla starts, a light tug on a mussed ebony ringlet following the nickname. His mossy eyes were dark with desire, and he placed his lips on her neck, kissing a trail down her jaw, stopping at her collarbone. Slipping the sweat-soaked cardigan off his shoulders, she traces a line down his cheek, eyes glued to his blush-red lips. “Can you lie down on the table for me? Please do try not to break any other body parts.”

“Haven’t I told you I’m afraid of heights?” Jimmy laughs, and with a small smile thrown over his shoulder, he hops up onto the table.

“You overlooked that, love,” Layla says, unbuttoning her blouse ever-so-slowly, surely teasing the guitarist, who leans back on his elbows. His eyes follow her every move as she takes off the rest of her clothing. “Now, I feel like you might have too many clothes on, Jim. We need to be even, after all.”

Slipping his pants and underwear off in record time, he reclines back, already hard. Fully exposed now, Layla climbs up onto the table as well, straddling the man’s lap, before sinking herself onto him. A calloused hand lands on her hips, helping her find the perfect position, until a soft groan rang through the near-empty room. Jimmy’s hands move up to her breasts, toying with the woman’s nipples, much to her delight. Layla grabs onto his chest for support, craning her head back in pure euphoria at the sensation, the hollow of her neck exposed as Jimmy raises up to nip at it. Grinding her hips to the rhythm of the man’s soft groans, she trails hickies up his chest and neck.

“Something to remember me by.” she says, looking at him with dark eyes, a haze of lust filling them. Hand gripping Layla’s ass tightly, he brings her ever-closer, a mumbled “fuck” leaving the woman’s kiss-bitten lips. The guitarist’s face is creased with absolute exhilaration, as he rocks back and forth to the movement of Layla’s body on his. The couple didn’t know where one ended and the other began. Ecstasy fills the room, and whispers of praise flow like music from lips bruised and bitten.

“You did so well today, angel. You’re incredible.”

Jimmy raises up once more to capture her lips in a bruising kiss, a hand raking through the woman’s hair roughly, landing on her throat. Jimmy squeezes it lightly, warningly, and presses his lips to Layla’s once more, swallowing the shriek of pleasure she gasps out.

“You liked that, petal?” Jimmy’s hoarse voice reaches Layla’s ears almost belatedly, too caught up in the pleasure of his hands on her, though she nods as if her life depended on it. Panting hard now, Layla quickens her pace, noises of pleasure growing louder. With the friction of his hand on her, roaming everywhere it could reach, Layla felt divine; heavenly in this embrace. Leaning down for a heavy, passionate kiss, Jimmy’s hand finds her hair again, and he tugs on it hard. The pain elicits a moan from Layla, as she reaches her peak.

With a stuttered breath, Jimmy releases as well, gasps leaving his lips as he looks at Layla reverently. The wetness from her core rushes over him as she lays back down beside him, spent. Back arching as she pants, her head turns to face him, faces painted with bliss.

In a post-coitus haze, Jimmy has his arms wrapped securely around Layla’s shoulders, as her head rests on his chest. Layla giggles tiredly, as her breaths ruffle the dark hair on Jimmy’s chest. Looking up at him, she’s pleased to see him looking right back at her.

“That certainly cheered you up, didn’t it?”

“You’re the best at cheering me up after all. This, of course, was just a bonus.” Jimmy noses at her messy hair, smelling a combination of fresh linen, sweat and her shampoo; hints of strawberry and mango tickling his nose.

“We should get up, the boys are probably looking for us,” Layla says, dragging light fingers across his stomach, watching goosebumps appear on the pale skin. Whether it’s from the sensation or the chill of the table, Layla didn't know, but she’s comfortable in his embrace, in danger of drifting off.

“What if we just… stayed here forever. They can find another guitarist.”

“You’re pretty irreplaceable, Page,” Layla whispers, reaching up to press her lips to his jaw. “I mean, who would the boys chaperone if you were gone?”

“Chaperone? I’m not that bad. I can take care of myself just fine.”

“Right, so Robert was lying about the time you refused to sleep for 5 days out of pure adrenaline? New York, 1973, I believe it was?”

“...”

“That’s what I thought. We need to have a serious talk about your habits, Jimmy.”

With a chuckle from the guitarist, the two lapse into a comfortable silence, as Jimmy presses a kiss to the top of Layla’s head, nuzzling it with his cheek.

“Hey,” Layla shifts to look up at him, eyes filled with adoration. She felt as though she were looking at a star. Beautiful and shining, but out of reach, as much as she wished for the opposite. She knew this couldn’t last, though she’d savour every last minute of it that she could. “I need to… tell you something.”

“What’s wrong, Layla?”

“Nothing’s wrong, really. It’s… kind of the opposite, actually.”

Jimmy tilts his head in confusion, turning on his side to face her. He looked like a puppy, hair wild about his head, and Layla couldn’t help but giggle at the sight.

“S-So,” Layla shifts, nervous all of a sudden. Jimmy grips her hand in his, and nods when their eyes finally meet. “Do you remember what you asked me earlier? About the… meaning of life. You might not remember, you were a little out of it, and—”

“I remember. You’re rambling, petal. What’s going on?”

“Well, it’s… it’s love. The meaning of life is… love. Jimmy, I…um…”

“What is it? You know you can tell me anything, right?”

“I’m… I guess... What I’m trying to say is,” Layla says, taking a deep breath as she looks into the eyes that captivate her, and make her smile, and set her on fire. “I’m falling in love with you, and I just… Yeah.”

Jimmy grins brightly, surging forward to capture her lips in a kiss bursting with joy. He laughs into it, as their noses brush together, his finger tracing nonsensical designs across her side.

“Very eloquently put, Porter.”

“Oh my God, I just confessed that I’m falling for you, and you focus on—”

“I’m falling in love with you too. I thought that may have been obvious, considering the state of this poor table.”

“W-Well,” Layla stutters, blushing crimson as Jimmy’s plush lips tilt up in a picture-perfect smirk. “Put your clothes on, Page. The boys are probably waiting for us.”

Jimmy laughs, but redresses in his stage clothes, turning to stare at Layla as she slips her jeans back on. Buttoning up her shirt and flattening her hair, which frizzed up like a halo around her flushed face, she gazes over at Jimmy. Crowding into his space, she put a hand to the back of his neck, up on her tiptoes to peck at his lips once more. He slips a hand to her cheek, and deepens the kiss. Pulling away to glimpse the golden smile that rests on Layla’s lips, he feels like his heart is going to beat right out of his chest. Arm in arm, they walk out of the room, twin smiles nearly splitting their faces. Jimmy glances over at Layla, and can’t believe just how lucky he is.

Screw falling in love, he thinks.

This is love, and he knows it for sure, now.

------

taglist: @jimmys-zeppelin @salixfragilis @timetraveller4 @earthfire-75 @thatiloveyouso (let me know if you want to be added!)

#only the black rose #jimmy page #led zeppelin #jimmy page fanfic #jimmy page fanfiction #jimmy page x oc #led zeppelin fanfic #classic rock fanfic

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spideymarvelws · 4 years

Text

What The Eyes Can’t See

Chapter Two : Opposite Reactions

Steve Rogers x Reader, Bucky Barnes x Reader (Royal!au)

Main Masterlist / Series Masterlist

Warnings : mentions of death, cursing

Series Summary :

People are afraid of change, afraid of the impossible, afraid of things that are not known. But how can they not be curious? How can they stay in the kingdom grounds, knowing that they live everyday on a repeat until their grave? Aren’t they curious to what lies beyond the forests? Whats hidden behind the trees? The wonders that lie outside the harsh walls that are set around them?

“The king be dammed,” you muttered, the rules that where set upon you the furthest thing from your mind. Riding your horse out of the borders, you did what you have always done best, you ran, the only thing keeping you going was being back with you family, your home. You could hear the guards quickly approaching, the shout of your betrothed growing closer. You can’t give up, not yet, not when you have your own love chasing you, looking for you, waiting for you.

But yet, you couldn’t decide which direction they were coming from.…

Word Count : 3.1k

...

Bucky sat near the fireplace in his chambers. The button up, off-white shirt he wore was torn open, revealing his bare chest to the heat. It had constricted his breath, becoming too tight around his chest when he took heavy breaths to control his growing anger when her barged into the room a few minutes prior. The tunic he wore was also torn but completely off his body lying on the floor next to his bed along with a shattered lantern that we threw against the wall.

The room itself was covered in darkness, the only thing chasing it away was the blazing flames, threatening to escape the fireplace. The food his maid had brought in before he returned was cold and untouched, except for the chalice of wine that he now held in his hand.

As he brought the chalice up to his lips, his gaze never left the flames in front of him, fiery and alive. The more he stared, the louder the screams of the men and woman echoed in his ears adding to his pounding headache.

He gulped down the sweet liquid, hoping that that the burn down his throat would help him forget, but it didn’t. The image of the each of the mens faces as they begged for mercy was engraved into his mind. He hated the guilt that he was feeling along with the number of thoughts questioning if what he did was right.

Deep down, Bucky didn’t want to be king. Unlike the people he was surrounded with everyday, the power hungry gene that had been passed through his family for centuries never resonated with him. But it was his duty, as leader, as king, to keep his people in check. Keep them fearful and afraid with his every move.

“Power is fear,” his father would always say, “Without fear, the people will start to think for themselves, and difference in opinion is what leads to war,”

He was eight when he first heard him say it, right after he saw three men hung for treason against the crown for being deemed as outsiders. He didn’t look away, he couldn’t, he needed to be the son his father wanted, the leader and king he wanted.

But what about the leader the people needed?

Bucky was no fool when it came to the opinions of the kingdom’s folk. He hated spending time in the Spring Vale, the richest and most brainwashed part of the kingdom guarded by the walls. He much rather spend his time in the castle grounds by himself or with a maiden he found for the night.

His father never really cared about his whereabouts during the day outside of scheduled meetings and classes, so during that free time, he usually grabbed his horse and rode outside of the red wall to visit the rest of the kingdom.

He was never really shown the outside villages surrounding the walls, making it easy for him to blend into the crowd with the right clothes and behaviour. Despite the lack of borders, the outside villages were just as trapped as the ones inside. Guards constantly patrolled the streets with weekly checkups in houses to make sure nothing was out of the ordinary.

Compared to the lush life he grew up in, the surrounding village was horse shit. Most houses weren’t even standing, cracked ruins and walls stood in there place, enough stability to throw a sheet over and have decent shelter. The few that were standing had cracks along the walls paired with non-existent doors and windows.

The market place was the busiest place in the villages. Food came in every week, half of what the kingdom would use in one day. Seeing people fight over something that the crown they served should and could provide in quantity made Bucky think for himself for once in his life.

Along with all the comments that the townsfolk would make, comments that now himself he would think off, comments that he couldn’t blame them for having.

It made him question everything he was taught growing up, everything that his father did as ruler and everything he did and king.

But he could never question it, unless he wanted his head on a spike. An abrupt knock filtered through his ears followed by the creak of his door. He didn’t make any acknowledgement, waiting for the person to state the reason for its presence. He also needed the time to zone back into the space of the ruthless king he was known to be, but he needed a distraction if he wanted to last for the next day.

When he didn’t hear anything, he let out an annoyed sigh, “Are you going to say anything or just stand there like a frightened goat,”

He stood up from his chair to face the intruder. She was one of the maids, on the younger side compared to rest and relatively new considering how frigid she was.

Perfect timing, he thought.

She was looking around his mistreated room, fear running up her spine. When he started approaching her, she stopped gawking at the state of his room and hesitantly looked him up and down, a dear caught in headlights.

“Speak up will ya? I haven’t got all day,” he said, crossing his arms over his chest.

“I-i’m so so-orry, my king,” she stuttered, bowing her head down, “But Lord Barnes re-equests you presence in his ch-chambers,”

Bucky stood directly in front of the girl now, gripping her chin between his finger to pull her head up and meet his gaze, “That wasn’t so hard now was it?” He questioned mockingly, lowering his voice to a course whisper, “Now be a good girl and clean my chambers for me for when I return,” he brought his lips close to her ear, “And maybe I’ll reward you if you do a good job, hmm?”

Leaving her stunned and frozen in place, he smirked, letting out a huff before opening his door, stepping out and slamming it behind him. Walking down the dark corridors, he tried to keep the smirk on his face for the guards as he was passing by but he could feel his exterior crumbling.

And of course his father chooses this time to call him to talk.

His father lived in the east wing of the castle, bare of anyone except a few guards and two maids that only passed by in the morning to deliver food and do some light cleaning. Usually, he would stay in the library when his tasks where finished for the day, but for the past few months, his health had been deteriorating, leaving him bound to his bed.

Greeting the guard that stood outside his father’s chambers, he opened the door, stepping inside the room. It was welly lit, candles in every corner with the fireplace as angry as his. However his father was not lying in bed, he was standing by the open window, gazing out into the night sky.

“Shouldn’t you be in bed?” Bucky questioned, straightening his posture. “What’s the point when I’m dying either way,” he responded dryly, taking a sip of wine.

Bucky didn’t want to stay long, his father never failed to irritate him and he knew this visit wouldn’t be an exception.

“Why did you call me here?” Bucky questioned, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Don’t use that tone with me boy,” his father replied, turning his head slightly, “You may be king, but I won’t hesitate to put you in your place,”

Bucky felt his anger boil, “Yes father,” he grumbled, self consciously rubbing his forearm, “Why did you call me here?” He asked, trying to mask the edge in his voice with much calmer tone.

His father took a sip of wine from the goblet in his hand. He stayed facing the window as he spoke, “Do you know why we rule the way we do?” He asked. “Yes, father.” Bucky replied, itching to get out of the dank room.

“Then why did I see you hesitate to behead the men who decided to betray us,” Bucky’s breath caught in his throat. Of course his father noticed, his silent hopes that he had blinked in that very moment were broken. But he knew better than to lie to the son of the Sovereign.

“It was my first time father,”

“But you’ve seen it countless times before,” he spat, “hesitation is not trait found in a king meant to rule,”

His father turned around and walked up to him. He grabbed the back of his neck, locking his grey eyes on his, “are you questioning the laws, James?”

“Of course not, father,” Bucky said, maintaining eye contact.

After a few seconds, his father finally let go, “Good,”

He walked back to the window, taking another sip of his wine.

“Is that all father?” Bucky grumbled.

“One more thing,” His father said, “The Grand Ball is tomorrow, I expect you to choose a queen by the end of the night. This kingdom needs an heir.”

His tone left no room for negotiation, “Yes father,”

With that, Bucky walked out of his room, slamming the door behind him.

…

“What do you think she’s talking about?” You questioned, laying your head in Steve’s lap.

“Maybe you would know if you tried to pay attention,” Steve said, poking your side as you rolled your eyes.

“She says the same thing every single assembly. Plus after that long walk I could use a nap right about now,” you grumbled, nuzzling further into his thigh.

Steve let out a chuckle before focusing back on the meeting held in front of him. Every month, a gathering was held to update the people on what was going on and what goals had to be reached by the end of the month.

“Things will be different this month Y/n,” Steve said determinedly, “I can feel it,”

You looked up at the blonde, “Not to be rude, but you said that last time,” you paused, “And I’m pretty sure you said that the time before that as well,”

Steve sighed, looking back down at you. He took your hands in his, kissing your knuckles, “I know, I know, but you want to know why I know this time is going to be different?”

“Enlighten me,” you hummed.

“Because, Valkyrie has a special assignment for you,” you shot up into a seated position, “Or so I’ve heard,”

“What?” You gasped, “This isn’t going to be another stupid horse back ride to the other camp is it?”

“If it was then she would’ve announced who’s going by now don’t you think?” Steve smiled, “Clint told me about it when I went to get our rations for the day, said that she stayed back after the council meeting with the head guard and he heard your name,”

You sighed, laying back down on Steves lap, “Then it’s probably nothing then, you know Clint likes to gossip. It’s probably just another exercise to improve my skills for the big fight,”

“Oh the optimist,” Steve hummed, playing with the sleeves of your shirt.

“You love it,” you smiled, looking up at the blue sky above you.

“yeah yeah,” he mumbled, focussing back on meeting, “Maybe it is,”

Valkyrie voice vibrated thought your ears, loud and clear for all the people surrounding her to hear. You always wondered how one person could hold so much power in just their voice, gaining enough respect to get everyone around them to listen. It was one of the reasons why you looked up to her, not just as a leader but as a mentor.

Her lover, Carol, stood behind her with the same stance, tall and proud. It was a strange contrast to what you had experienced in King’s Empire. The levels of respect and what decided who deserved it were a stark difference to the open environment you grew up in with the north camp. Most things like woman leaders and relationships with the same sex were forbidden, something that never made sense to you given the home you grew up in.

Which is why you were so conflicted with the feelings of change.

You were comfortable with what happened in camp, the routine you had every week. Waking up in Steve’s arms, completing whatever tasks where given to you that day, talk with whoever was around you at the time and have dinner with the camp to end the day.

It was what you did since you came to camp so many years ago. You was fine to the little changes that had been made here and there, but the talk of something big happening made you fearful for the months to come.

But you stayed open minded, not just for the people who needed it, but for Steve as well.

“Hey, dream bug,” Steve poked your cheek, “Meetings over,”

You blinked rapidly, “Shit, really?”

“Yes really,” Steve chuckled, “Do I need to do the recap?”

You sat up, turning to face your boyfriend while stretching your legs, “Do I need to answer?” You crossed them quickly.

“Well,” he started, clasping his hands together. “Thor gave the updates on resources concerning food, they seem stable for the rest of the month. Loki mentioned that the weapons are coming along, along with intel from the other camps. Carol announced that our army is growing bigger and bigger.” He tapped his finger on his chin, amused with the long yawn you let out, “Oh and Valkyrie wants to see you in the map room directly after the meeting,”

Your eyes widened as you shot up from your seat, “Why didn’t you tell me that!” You shouted, turning to run towards her hut.

“Maybe listen next time,” Steve shouted back, laughing as he watched you speed towards the hut, knowing fully well you still had time before you had to arrive.

As you reached the hut, you yanked the clothe covering the entrance open, smelling sheepishly at your leader, “Sorry i-“

“Y/n! Thank you for coming early,” she smiled, motioning for you to enter, “We still have to wait for people to come,”

You huffed under your breath, “Fucker,”

“Is Steve not with you?” Carol asked, removing her armour in the corner of the room.

“He should be on his way,” you sighed, sliding your hand across the large table in the middle of the room, walking to stand next to Peter, one of the newer recruits.

“Y/n,” you decided to introduced yourself, not sure if you had spoken to the boy before. You had seen him around the field training with all the other recruits. you remembered being impressed with his skill and agility. You’d never seen such a quick learner when it came to the ways of the camp.

“Oh, uh- Peter,” he blushed, looking towards the floor.

It was silent between both of you as you waited for people to file in for the gathering to begin until he cleared his throat.

“Do- do you know why we’re here?” He asked shyly, playing with his fingers.

“Not really, no,” you thought, leaning against the tabled on your forearms, “I’m sure it’s just a personal assignment to venture out or to search the surrounding areas, nothing to hard,”

“Okay, okay,” he mumbled running his hands through his curls.

You looked at him with curiosity, “How long have you been here Peter?”

“Two months,” he shrugged, a small smile creeping on his face, “I assume you’ve been here much longer?”

“Try fifteen years,” you chuckled, looking up at him, noticing his stiff posture, “Don’t worry about what other people think of you, here, we have no room for judgment,”

Your eyes caught the movement of the man who walked into the hut, “Well most people don’t,” you grumbled, picking at your nails

“Y/n,”

“Brock,” you muttered.

“Brock,” You heard Valkyrie repeat, just as annoyed as you were, “What are you doing here, you should be with Clint and the new recruits,”

“Well I ran into Stevie on the way here, heard that one of those recruits are in here,” he sent a pointed look to Peter.

“He’s here because I ordered him too. Don’t forget your place here Brock” Valkyrie countered crossed her arms in front of her chest.

“Ah yes, how could I forget,” he smirked, walking over to Peter and slapping a hand on his back, “I just don’t think this one is ready for whatever you’re going to assign him too,”

“You mean the Peter who toped all of his skill classes by a landslide? The Peter who ran four laps around the camp without breaking a sweat? The Peter who took you down in his third fight with you?” You raised one of your eyebrows, standing up straight, “Whatever is it, I’m sure he is more than capable to do whatever he has to do,” you smiled sweetly, “Way more capable that you could ever be,”

Brock walked over to you, his fists and jaw clenched tightly. You didn’t move an inch, paying no mind to the tension that rose in the room, you continued.

“Maybe that’s why you have to find some excuse to get in here and hear something that confidential, It bothers you that someone you consider beneath you gets to instead,”

His anger only made you more amused and proud of yourself for pushing his buttons in the right ways to frustrate him the most.

Without a word, he stomped out of the room, bumping Steve in the shoulder on his way out.

You beamed returning to your original position against the table. Valkyrie and Carol stood with smirks on there faces while Peter smiled shyly. Steve stood confused by the entrance.

“Should I ask?” He rubbed the back of his neck with his hand.

“It’s nothing important,” Valkyrie smirked, turning to face Carol.

“Thank you, Y/n,” Peter said, letting out a loud breath, “No one’s ever stood up for me like that before,”

“It was my pleasure,” you grinned, leaning into Steve as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder, “Brock’s a dick, don’t pay any mind to what he says. He pulls most of it out of his ass anyways.”

You and Peter chuckled while Steve sent you a look of confusion. Before he could ask what ever happened, Bruce came rushing into the hut.

“Finally!” Valkyrie exclaimed, “The man of the hour,”

“Sorry, I was discussing clothes arrangements with Wanda,” he mumbled out of breath, “Apparently the design wasn’t native to the kingdom so she had to do the stitching over before it was ready to wear to the castle,”

“To the castle?” You uttered, looking at bruce confused.

“Yes, for when you and Peter head to castle tonight?” He turned to Valkyrie, “Did you not tell them?”

...

A/n : So uh hi, it’s been a while. A lot of stuff has been going on in my life and adding that with school starting back, things have kind of been overwhelming. But now i think i’ve caught my bearings (hopefully anyways) and i got some inspiration to write so i took it. I hope you enjoy!

Feedback is always appreciated 🥰

Taglist : @jadegill @bluevxnus @learisa @supernaturalwintersoldier @un-viaje-en-las-estrellas

#bucky barnes x reader #steve rogers x reader #stucky x reader #peter parker x reader #bucky barnes #steve rogers smut #stucky imagine #peter parker #royal!au #bucky barnes x y/n #steve rogers x y/n #bucky barnes x you #steve rogers x you #king!bucky barnes x you #king!bucky #king!bucky barnes x reader

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wunderlass · 4 years

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I’m feeling so deflated to be writing this post. S1 had its flaws but those could be placed at the feet of a freshman showrunner who could learn from her mistakes going into S2 and up her game. Unfortunately, that didn’t happen, and S2 was a mess.

S1 had a clear central plotline: the mystery of Rosa’s death, leading to justice in the form of Noah’s death and Rosa’s resurrection. S2’s central plotline was…um. The kidnappings? Leading into the plot to blow up Crashcon? I think? But there was so much other stuff gong on it’s hard to tell.

Carina – if you happen to come stumbling into the tags for reactions – you’ve already acknowledged that you struggle to edit your scripts down for length. And it does show in the finished product. But you also struggle to edit your ideas down to fit into the episode count you have. There were too many extraneous plot threads this season, too many guest characters, and the ideas you had were shoddily and sloppily executed.

There were shining moments scattered here and there and the occasional good episode, but for the most part this season lurched from badly paced episode to badly paced episode. Stuff was crammed into each episode and yet somehow the plot also treaded water until 2x11 when it all kicked off – and this was because so much of what happened in the earlier episodes didn’t feed into the main plot. Even Max’s death, the overarching motivation for many characters at the beginning, was shoved to the side for other ideas.

And the payoffs for each of these storylines was too often underwhelming. Max can’t come back because he’ll be full of dark energy and a destructive force! Resolved in 30 seconds by him blowing up a pile of stuff. Max can’t remember Liz! Fixed in the same episode. That pattern continued with the finale feeling like it was trying to wrap up all these storylines without really having a story of its own. The various cliffhangers from Crashcon were tied up before the title card and then let’s spend the next 40 minutes treading water again.

There were good moments in the finale. Max and Isobel’s discussion, the Maneforrest kiss, Rosa and Helena’s reunion. But as for the rest? Hear me whine:

- Jesse’s death was anticlimactic. His line about “no more Manes men” makes no sense given as far as he knew Flint (and maybe Clay?) is still alive. His death should have been poetic because one of his son’s killed him but it didn’t hold the weight it should have, possibly because it came so early in the episode.

- It would have been far better if Jesse had discovered that Harlan killed Tripp and buried him beneath the shed. How awful would it have been for his entire worldview to be shaken by that revelation? How perfect would it have been if he discovered that Tripp loved Nora? If he died after learning all of that, becoming desperate and sloppy in whatever scheme he was trying to pull off (self-immolation via the bomb?), it would have been a fitting ending.

- So many characters this season were badly served. Alex, Michael, and to a lesser extent Max, had real arcs and progression. Alex especially you can see them setting up his growth for a payoff in the finale.

- Kyle was shafted, shoved to the side for the Steph storyline that didn’t feel like it was going anywhere, and I suspect we got a lot of that cut away to make room for other stories.

- Rosa’s story started off strong and then mostly got tied into rehab or helping Isobel. Them having her out and about in public in Roswell is complete nonsense.

- Max had a line for Isobel about her becoming her “entire self” this season, and that rang false to me. We’ve only seen Isobel develop her powers. Her personality has shifted each episode, fractured and inconsistent, dependant on what the writers needed her to do. She didn’t get much of a storyline of her own – the abortion was redundant, serving as a political soapbox for Carina rather than anything that served the character – and while she’s found out more about her heritage, that’s never been as important as Michael or Max finding out about theirs. She said she wanted to become more like her mother and that never went anywhere.

- I was so hopeful that Carina had listened and understood the criticisms with Maria’s handling in S1 and worked to improve it. She certainly gave her increased screentime. Except, so much of that screentime was tied into Michael, and latterly Isobel. She lacked interactions with Liz or Rosa. She was in two whole scenes in the finale and after she broke up with Michael, she disappeared from the story, and if that doesn’t say it all…

- And that break-up was contrived bullshit. I’m not saying this as a shipper. It felt like they’d planned to have them break-up in the finale and wrote it even though the motivations hadn’t been properly established. Seeds were sown but they were communicating well as a couple and resolving their issues as they went along. Suddenly those issues got un-resolved and were enough to break them up.

- The most galling part is that so much of what follows comes from Tripp’s diary, and Maria is excluded. This is her story too! Louise was her great-grandmother! Rather than sitting around her in the hospital room reading this stuff, they do it in the Crashdown.

- Which fits the pattern of what’s happened all season. Maria found out she was part alien and it was about her powers, rather than her legacy, rather than what happened to her great-grandparents.

- And it became clear that it was done so they could do the Nora/Tripp and Malex parallel.

- Which completely solidifies for me where Carina’s priorities lie. She’s been clear that Malex is her favourite ship on the show and Michael is her favourite character. But this season has shown that she’s incapable of ensuring her favouritism doesn’t screw over other characters.

- The sad thing is this really does show up in marketing. Carina always pushes and praises Vlamis and barely ever mentions Jeanine on her SM. Media outlets write about Malex as the centre of the show and they aren’t supposed to be. We have a sci-fi show with a Latina leading lady and nobody cares – not the showrunner, not the media (outside of Latinx-centric publications), not the fandom. I’m not Latina and it frustrates me so I can’t imagine how actual Latinx people feel about that.

- Maria was dragged into a love triangle that Carina never had any intention of doing justice to. Maria and Michael were always only ever meant to be a pit-stop on the way to a big Malex reunion. Sadly it’s clear the same goes for Maneforrest. Why write something if you’re only going to do it half-arsed? And it clearly was. That’s why the Maria and Michael break-up was so perfunctory and illogical.

- While I’m on the subject of Maria – last season Mimi was clearly deteriorating and didn’t recognise adult Maria anyway. Now that seems to have shifted to Mimi’s mind moving through time. It’s still unclear if this is the alien DNA or what was done to Patricia Deluca in Caulfield. I don’t understand why they introduced both elements – apart from being able to give Maria a line about unethical science which OH BOY what a contrast with Liz.

- Speaking of Liz.

- Wow.

- If the central storyline was the kidnappings and Crashcon shenanigans, she really had no involvement with that all season apart from the very end. All the investigation went to other characters. Her mother was involved, but not Liz.

- Let me repeat that.

- Our lead character was not involved the central storyline of the season.

- Alternatively, if you think Max learning about his history, and all of the reveals about 1948, and Maria’s heritage etc etc were supposed to be the main storyline…

- Doesn’t matter because Liz wasn’t involved in any of that either!

- Liz was a subplot in her own show after they brought Max back. Hell, she was a subplot even when she was working on that.

- The narrative focus really has centred on Michael, Alex, and later Max.

- I wonder what they have in common with each other.

- If you don’t believe me, check out the screentime figures for this season. Liz had the fourth largest amount of screentime in the finale, and she’s only had majority screentime in a handful of episodes all season (2x01, 2x07, 2x11).

- And then realise that the plot kept moving after Liz left Roswell. She’s just not part of it anymore.

- I watched the finale and kept asking myself where Liz was because she kept disappearing for whole chunks of time.

- She was in her own subplot about science for the back half of this season, and honestly, I’m going to have to write an entirely separate post about Liz and ethics in science because NOPE.

- Max was right. Liz deserved to follow her calling but she had options that didn’t involve risking the aliens.

- As such the Echo break-up was stupid but whatever, based on this season I guess it needed to happen.

- Did Max even care that Liz left? He loved her for twenty years and then when he had her, it didn’t matter anymore? What the fuck? Are we ever going to get answers as to why he fell so hard and loved her for so long, or is the “Malex is cosmic” story more important?

- Also the whole thing about the Genericorp lady not being interested in Liz based on meeting her at the Crashdown was stupid. You hire scientists based on the previous work they’ve done and their credentials. Diego’s word should have been enough to convince her, and then maybe an actual proper job interview to make sure she was a good fit. Not “let’s sneak into her secret lab to look at what she’s working on”.

- When Liz does leave, she only says goodbye to Rosa and Kyle. Arturo is mentioned but not seen. Which means the whole ICE sequence this season, which should have been a solid motivation for Liz to take the Genericorp job on its own, has been resolved without a proper payoff. All that stress – scenes that I know felt genuinely stressful to some viewers because of how close to home it hit – and we don’t even get to see Arturo seeing his “genius daughter” leave with his future secured.

- It’s plausible that Liz said goodbye to other characters – Maria, Isobel, Michael – off screen BUT SHE’S YOUR LEAD CHARACTER AND HER LEAVING TOWN SHOULD CARRY SOME EMOTIONAL WEIGHT FFS

- Compare Liz leaving and arriving at the ocean to Buffy Summers leaving Sunnydale in Becoming Part 2. There is no contest.

- It’s clear to me that the audience Carina writes this show for is herself. And that’s fine. Plenty of writers do that. But that means she’s writing a show for the women in fandom who like epic mlm romances with lots of angst. And the problem with that is that this show has a Latina lead who is not being done justice.

- This is not me railing against Malex. There is space in the show for both things. This is me expressing my frustration at a showrunner and creative team who are not taking care with all characters equally.

- Carina uses her platform to throw in politics and use characters as mouthpieces without considering their impact. She thinks she’s educating the straight white people in the audience without thinking about how scenes of ICE intimidation, homophobic violence, and racism will affect the people who are impacted by those things in real life.

- Am I done with the show? Probably not. I’ve got fics I want to write and while I’m not hubristic enough to think I can write better than a team of professional writers, I’m going to at least try and do some of these neglected elements of the show justice.

- Hubris. Remember when I thought that was going to be a theme of this season? Apparently not. There was no theme, unless “no editing, we die like men” counts..

#roswell new mexico #rnm spoilers

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korpuskat · 4 years

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Another ask originally for my self-insert blog, but it’s extensive enough it gets a post here as well. (18+ below cut)

❤️ - Kissing Headcanons

Poor baby is so starved for affection, but it will still take him ages for him to be comfortable with kisses anywhere near his face.

Neck and hands are safest, forehead can be iffy depending on how aggressive his skin is being.

Don’t kiss the mask directly if he hasn’t shown you his face.

Seriously, don’t, he’ll cry. Or rather he’ll storm off to the basement and lock the door and you won’t see him for quite a while.

He’ll only let you kiss him through the mask once he’s taken it off around you and he’s sure you won’t be repulsed by him.

Without the mask, he always starts off shy and scared that this time you’ll flinch. When you don’t he can’t keep his mouth off you, he’ll smother you in messy, unpracticed kisses.

🧡 - Affection Headcanons

Looooooves physical touch as a love language (seriously, this boy is so touch-starved, please hold him), but also likes to give gifts when he can find something which really depends on how the family hunting trips have been going.

The ultimate display of affection with you is him taking off his mask. He’s worn masks since he was a child, that trauma is deeply rooted. He doesn’t even take it off at home around his family. If he trusts you enough to take it off– mind you this could take months of cultivating a relationship– he’s just over, either you’re better than anything he could ever dream of, let alone hope for, or you’re just like everyone else.

Talking!! Thomas can talk, it’s just usually unpleasant for him. Thomas’s condition alone gives him a hypernasality to his voice (too much air escapes from his nose), but even moreso, his scars and deterioration can make the actual act of talking uncomfortable. He won’t say much- he wouldn’t be super talkative even without his scars– but seeing how his voice makes your face light up makes him want to do it more.

💛 - Domestic Headcanons

Literally just likes to be around you all the time? If he’s doing his leatherwork, he’d love for you to just sit in the room with him.

He isn’t fond of reading- and with his mottled relationship to school I don’t think he got a lot of time to learn– but he loves for you to read to him. Even if he isn’t entirely following what you’re saying, he’s enthralled by the sound of your voice.

Wants about 80 kids and that’s lowballing it. If you don’t want kids? Good luck.

💚 - Holiday Headcanons

The Hewitts are incredibly poor, but Thomas still loves Christmas. Luda Mae makes cookies and knits what gifts she can, the whole family meets up and spends the day together (which goes about as well as expected).

Again, Thomas loves to give gifts, he’ll be picking through travelers’ belongings all year to save his favorites for Christmas.

They really go all out on the Christmas roast. Tommy’ll be looking for that perfect meat cut for quite a while in advance, even if he has to freeze it.

💙 - AU/Crossover Headcanons

If Thomas didn’t have a skin condition, his personality wouldn’t be all that different. I think he’d still be very withdrawn and quiet due to his unaltered home life (I will stand by my HC that Charlie is an asshole even before becoming Hoyt)

But, that said, I think he might be stable enough and have enough outside positivity in his life to not be compelled to murder. After all, Thomas’s most deep-set trauma is that people judge, fear, and bully him based on his appearance.

(It would not solve the apprehension have about his fucking size or broody personality or mildly violent tendencies)

💜 - NSFW Headcanons (oops this is long)

Actually, Thomas would probably be ready to have sex fairly soon. But bless him, Tommy is kind of a romantic and would rather know you really wanted him and he’d have to work up to taking his mask off first.

He wants you very early into the relationship and if you’re both desperate enough he might allow for grinding before he takes his mask off.

Once he takes the mask off, it’s maximum two days before he wants to go all the way.

Thomas is big. Perhaps only a little above average in length, but deceptively thick, even relative to his size. Even his fingers are thick.

Seriously:

Thankfully, Thomas is incredibly giving. You’ve made him so incredibly happy and if he can bask in him making you happy, he absolutely fucking will.

Due to the scars and deformities of his face, it takes him a while before he can be both emotionally and physically comfortable going down. But once he is comfortable? Hold on for dear life. You’ll have to fight to get him out from between your thighs

It will take a hot minute for Thomas to realize he won’t break you but if you can convince him to use just a little of that pent-up aggression in the bedroom? oh boy. He loves pinning your wrists and making you feel small under him, but be sure to kiss him lots afterwards so he knows you like it too.

He’s okay with quick and rough or slow and sensual, but either way it’s going to be intimate. Thomas needs that emotional connection, wants to know you’re enjoying being with him.

🖤 - Dark or Angsty Headcanons

It only takes on traveler fighting back. There’s no doctor out in the middle of nowhere, no EMTs to save you.

And Thomas will hold you, press his big hand against your wounds. Though his mask you’ll see his wide, fearful eyes and he knows there’s nothing he can do.

If you reach for his mask he’ll pull it off, frantically shifting between trying to murmur soft, soothing things, kissing your face, and staring, disbelieving into your eyes.

‘Love you.’ He says- his voice is already ruined and strange with his scars and nose, but as his throat tightens it wobbles into truly unintelligible sniffling. ‘Love you, love you, always.’

You kiss him, touch his face- assure him that it’s not his fault.

But when you’re quiet, when you stop leaning into his touch and your eyes go far off and vacant, Thomas Hewitt dies with you.

🤍 - Pure, Fluffy Headcanons

He’s pretty warm, but I think he likes to cuddle with soft things so blanket thief. But if you’re around, you’ll do.

Can, will, and has stolen your stuffed animals so he can hold them

If he wakes up first (which is likely; the Hewitts are a good, industrious family of farmers so they’re likely up before dawn), he’ll spend quite a while just watching you sleep. He’s absolutely fascinated with and humbled by how you can be so relaxed and open with him.

🤎 - Random Headcanons

Luda Mae taught him to sew. He’s skilled enough he could make clothes or toys, but is somewhat embarrassed about being skilled in a feminine hobby-- but he will mend his own clothes, but he prefers his mama do it. Her stitches are still neater than his since he usually works with leather.

Secretly loves radio dramas, but doesn’t care much for trying to commandeer the radio from Hoyt or Luda.

#idk how to write headcanons im a fic writer not an imagines blog lol #thomas hewitt #thomas hewitt x reader #thomas hewitt x you #thomas brown hewitt #reader insert #slasher x reader #Slasher x You #slashers x reader #slashers x you #thomas hewitt headcanon #headcanons #thomas hewitt headcanons #that enough tags??? tag enough tags for you tumblr????#nsft /#citrus

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its-a-branwen-thing · 4 years

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The Right Thing

Doing the right thing has been something repeated a lot by our characters this season. Ironwood. Qrow. Oscar. The Ace Ops. Team RWBY. It’s just as much the centerpiece to this volume as trust. Because they all think that their way is the correct way. I definitely think this volume is laying down the narrative groundwork for what really constitutes the idea of the “right thing.” And I’m gonna break it down.

“It’s important not to lose sight of what drives us, love, justice, reverence, but the moment you put your desires before my own, they will be lost to you.”

In E4 of V6, Salem lays into her subordinates after their failure at Haven. It’s all because Cinder acted to put her own needs--her revenge against Ruby, her proclivity for hubris--first. Salem is an absolute ruler and she makes this very clear. She does not have a council. She does not trust those beneath her. She uses fear to control them. And when they fail her she does not forgive them easily. Salem is her own judge, jury, and witness. And when those in her circle do no succeed, she takes matters into her own hands regardless of what it might cost.

Sound familiar?

I made a long post about Ironwood and his character arc and why I think he makes such an amazing fallen hero or, let’s just say it, an anti-villain. This isn’t about Ironwood’s right or wrongness, but I understand the interpretative nature of his decisions and why people feel one way or the other. But this is, in the framework of this show, a definite deterioration of his good standing with our main cast.

Ironwood has always kept his power insular. He has loyal supporters that he earned, I don’t doubt, not by using fear but by being a good leader. Salem’s team is ruled mostly by blind devotion (Tyrian), hunger for power (Cinder), need for revenge (Watts and...Hazel?), and then, like, Stockholm’s Syndrome at this point (Mercury, Emerald--although also because she stans a queen Cinder).

Ironwood’s circle is composed of people who have the same goals in mind as him and who believe in his methods. Even when they become unethical. Winter and the Ace Ops still side with him even knowing it will cost them Mantle. Clover doesn’t question why Qrow needs to be detained he just does it. Because what Ironwood says is the right thing is, to them, the right thing. But it isn’t given to them as a choice, it’s done as a command.

“Someone is about to make a play and I do not trust Leo to stop them.”

“You’ve never trusted anyone but yourself.”

“And for good reason! If Oz had just listened to me from the start.”

I wish I’d included this in my last Ironwood post because it proves he has always been divested of trust.

Watching this scene in V4 again helped me realize that Ironwood has always been a man about power. He hoards his armies and those loyal to him and isolates Atlas to prepare for, what we now know, his plan to launch Amity Tower and reconnect the world. But he fails at that. And what is his immediate reaction? Not to try and work out an alternative with those around him. But to shut them down. And detain them.

“But we have an opportunity to reunite the world, if we launch the tower we can all work together again, we could even call for help. If we can hold out long enough...”

“Sometimes doing the right thing means making tough decisions.”

“You’re right. And I think the right thing to do would be to stand our ground.”

I think this exchange is missed too often. Ruby and Blake both advise Ironwood to take a stand, to “hold out” against Salem’s armies until the tower can be launched. They aren’t asking him for anything more than what he made clear to them in the beginning was what he wanted. And he chooses not to listen to them because it isn’t what he’s judged as a viable plan. Even the Ace Ops, who are witnessing this too, immediately blame RWBY for not being more up front with Ironwood. And it’s sad, because I see exactly why they’re angry. But as Weiss said, “none of this matter right now!” because it doesn’t. Because Salem is here. And the right thing is being pulled in too many directions for it to mean much of anything.

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“Why couldn’t you just do the right thing? Instead of the thing you were told?”

“Sometimes the right decision’s the hardest to make.”

I have some feelings about this line that I can’t quite articulate without sounding, well, positively bonkers. Because paired with his “someone had to take the fall” it sounds a little too...off? Like it happened already? (Also why did he jump out of the plane first?? I just...so they wouldn’t have his luck and would hopefully be injured in the crash?)

But the point I’m trying to make is that this is where we see what the cost of blind loyalty is. There have been plenty of posts discussing Clover and Qrow and Robyn’s actions and why they did the things they did. But I think, paired with Clover’s manipulation of Robyn, this was a betrayal not only to Qrow but to us, the audience. Because we liked Clover (well, I mean, your mileage may vary). And yet he still did Ironwood’s bidding until the end, even to the point of it costing him his life (again, I know there’s heavy debate around this) because nothing mattered more than his orders, not even his heart reason.

The Ace Ops are inflexible in their loyalty to Ironwood. It’s unconditional. And they believe what they’re doing is right. But our team, RWBY and JNR and Oscar and Qrow, believe in something different. They believe in doing what’s right intuitively. They’re not viewing this war like a chessboard with pieces to be moved at will. Ironwood is doing that, which is why I think Cinder’s “gotcha” at the end is so ironic. Because Salem isn’t the only one playing chess. Ironwood is too.

But our other heroes are not.

Why is Qrow in the drop ship on his way to prison with Robyn at the end of E13? Because he went back instead of escaping or pursuing Tyrian. 

He went back to the scene of a crime that will be pinned on him to be at the side of a dying friend. This directly juxtaposes Clover’s whole character as he was presented in his final moments. There are no rules in Qrow’s world anymore, really, and he isn’t a solider like Clover. Their orders were to apprehend Tyrian. And Qrow let him go. Because something mattered more than that, and that small ownership of self is what’s been shown this season as what separates our heroes from our fallen heroes and their enemies.

---

“My life doesn’t matter!”

“I disagree.”

Penny, a robot designed by the Atlesian military, who has been in Ironwood’s circle this whole time, chooses without hesitation to save Winter instead of go after Cinder. Because Winter’s life mattered more to her than getting Cinder. And in the end, she chooses to go with RWBYJRN and MP and leave behind her position at Atlas. Because it was, to her, the right choice. It is a discussion she has with Winter in various scenes. She doesn’t believe in what Ironwood is doing because he’s ignoring the most important part of what makes people human:

Personal feelings.

Please don’t hurt me.

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“I am done letting others’ inability to see the big picture get in the way of doing what’s right. Robyn, the Council, this Kingdom...even you.”

Ironwood’s inability to see the smaller side of humanity is what makes him ultimately fall right into Salem’s palm. Because he’s functioning just like she is. Rule absolute. His declaration of martial law speaks to that. While our heroes have always put other things first. Each other, the people of Mantle, the idea of saving someone or staying with someone rather than pursuing a goal that might, in the long run, help “the big picture”. This is precisely what Salem always threatens to snuff out. Those small sparks of hope or justice or love. It’s why Ren’s hesitation is also so important. Because it showed our heroes care more about each other than the “big picture.” And, fantasy or not, humanity in those small moments has always been the right thing here. And some of our cast are missing that piece.

Salem has a relic and a maiden. So do our heroes. But divided, they have a maiden while their enemies have a relic. Salem divided them exactly as she said she would, because Ozpin wasn’t there to talk sense into Ironwood and Oscar wasn’t good enough I guess the trust that was built between him and team RWBY was broken (can’t deny that, Ironwood was pissed they went behind his back and I get it). Doing what’s right isn’t about what makes sense from a standpoint of strategy. It’s about what, inside, our heroes feel is right. We can call it idealistic or naive but remember that’s exactly what Salem fears. And it’s exactly what our heroes need in order to unite themselves again. They need--and I say this with a heavy, heavy sigh--to trust love.

---

“A smaller, more honest soul. It's true that a simple spark can ignite hope, breathe fire into the hearts of the weary. The ability to derive strength from hope is undoubtedly mankind's greatest attribute...which is why I will focus all of my power to snuff it out.”

And that, friends, is why I believe that the right thing is always based on our emotions. Because not relying on them is what cost our tin man his heart. They are what Salem prevents her people from having. And yet having them is what lead Penny to coming into her own as the winter maiden. It’s what fuels Ruby’s silver eyes. It’s what made Pyrrha go back into Beacon Tower even knowing she’d lose. Because it was the right thing to do.

There’s always a case for kindness and love and hope. And I’d like to make it here.

#plants flag on this hill and wriggles it a little #rwby #rwby spoilers #rwby meta #salem #ironwood #i could just tag the whole cast but i wont #long

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candywhittemore · 3 years

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Skincare Strategies This Summer

A rugged pair of Sunglasses is the subsequent must have for on a regular basis in the sun. Squinting into the sun will not only aid in giving you wrinkles but the suns rays are so damaging on the eyes almost lead to terrible problems. UV related illnesses can include cataracts, skin cancer on the eyelids, macular degeneration, the location where sensitive area of the cornea begins to deteriorate and pteryguim (where tissue grows on the whites of your eyes). Purchased had this and needed surgery eliminate the yellow spots from his eyes, again from not wearing sun glasses enough. Glasses with around UV 400 are counseled. If you are in a profession that needs a regarding hand washing, like teacher, doctor, or mom, alternate antibacterial gel with regular soap and water. Both can be driving for the hands, but switching back and Fermelique Review forth gives skin color a chance to recover. A few do use soap and water, be sure to dry hands Skincare Tips thoroughly, because wet skin is easily chapped. We essential local licensing been guilty of cramming our suit cases with excessive but there are some smartest ways to decrease the amount of stuff you take. For example free samples can function well but they DIY Skincare are charge. There are also some bargains pertaining to being had on travel sized products and if you just can't bear to part using favourite toiletries, how about emptying them into travel bottles - the perfect compromise! Many of these approaches will profit to keep around the weight of one's luggage and make sure that you've have a good range of skincare products with owners.

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mrs-pissoff · 5 years

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Your eyes (part 2)

Part 1 here

Pairing: Reader (she/her) x Thane Krios

Disclaimer: I don’t own Mass Effect or its characters.

A/N: This will be a long one. I’m just verbose and love a slower burn. I have no idea how long this story will end up being, but hopefully I can finish it before my muse dies. I can tell she’s getting tired already.

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She retreated to her room hastily after the encounter, and if she wasn't feeling sleepless before, now she was definitely sure she wasn't going to get even a minute of restful sleep. It was all so surreal and his words rang in her mind endlessly.

You intrigue me.

Sitting down onto her bed a heavy sight escaped her lips. She wanted to understand why Thane of all people would say something like this, and to her. Someone who was less than kind to him. He didn’t seem to be the kind of man who’d say such things easily. The thought of him messing with her did cross her mind, but he surely has much better things to do than to get back at her in such a juvenile manner.

The need to remember and analyze her interactions with the drell overwhelmed her. She must have missed something that led to this moment. Surely she has.

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The last time they spoke was a few weeks ago, when he got word of what his son was about to do. The mission only required Shepard and Thane in the end, plus the cooperation of Captain Bailey and C-Sec, but she was still around while they gathered information on Kolyat's target and the person who ordered the hit. She was patiently listening from the sidelines, waiting for the pair to finish talking to Mouse.

She knew very little of Thane and his life. She never bothered to ask. ‘Assassins are not very complicated’, she thought. Meet contact, acquire target, fulfill contract by murder. Easy enough for someone who has the stomach to kill just about anyone regardless of their moral standing. Apparently, Thane was one such man and somehow that didn't make him appear in a more favorable light at all. Of course she was missing many of the pieces here. For example she never knew he had a son until yesterday. Someone was forgiving enough to love a man who kills without distinction if he's told to do so. The world was truly strange.

In hindsight her words seem awfully skewed now. Shepard had told her a few things about him since then, not that she cared to know any of it previously. It may have been better not to learn those things, but it was probably an attempt at trying to diffuse the situation by making her understand Thane's point of view a bit more. Not that it needed diffusing in the first place, it would never deteriorate further. She was done with that conversation, and with him. He was part of the team, and as such had to be tolerated, but that was the extent to what she could do for him. Nevertheless, Shepard, ever the peacekeeper, was relentless and in the end she learned certain things about him. Like how he was raised by the hanar and trained as an assassin from a young age, and how this was pretty much all he knew of the world around him. Seemed like an awfully meaningless life to her, having others make all the decisions for you as if you lacked free will, and being used as a tool. According to Shepard, Thane even referred to himself as such. It's hard to believe that anyone would think of living such a life as great honor. Senseless, all of it. Willingly giving away children to be trained as assassins, stripping them of the opportunity of a healthy and happy childhood. A fate like that can lead to no fully functional adult and Thane is a prime example of that. Life scars us all in different ways.

She knows these things now, but back then, at that moment when she first snapped at him, she didn't. These major differences in their culture flew right by her head and she never bothered to look deeper into why exactly Thane would do the things he had done. Perhaps it wouldn't have mattered anyway. Just because she knows, doesn't mean she has to accept it as well. It's just easier to understand now. But that day? That day when he admitted to abandoning his own son, who was now about to ruin his own life, Thane just looked like a dying coward with a filthy conscience, ready to save face. A man hopelessly scrambling to lighten his soul before the end. She thought his reasons were selfish and wanted to let him know how much of a hypocrite he was, how he failed to calculate the consequences of his negligence which culminated in this unfortunate situation. For the first time since joining the Normandy crew, she abandoned her cautious and reserved manner and let her words flow freely without filter. Words that were meant to tear at him. And she didn’t even understand why.

Shepard had just told him it was not his fault, and like a saint, he said he had to hold himself accountable. That was the last push, she couldn't stay silent any longer.

"How hypocritical of you. Leaving your son behind only to return now. Must have been one long journey finding that backbone." Her voice was low but bitter. She didn't want passersby to notice the conversation, but she wanted him to hear every word. Of course she wouldn't support his son's decision, but it was clear to her now where it was coming from. They never mentioned the possible motive during the debriefing on the shuttle, for good reason it seems.

"He faces a dark path." That much was evident, she wasn't debating it.

"If only he had a good example to follow, huh?" She felt her mood sink further as she faced him, and her tone mirrored that clearly. It was dripping with venom. And Shepard of all people told him just a few seconds ago how it wasn't his fault. There was no one left who was more at fault than Thane. No one.

"I left to protect him. To make sure that he would never be pursued by the people who killed his mother." A sound argument at first glance, but severely flawed at the second. At least he seemed to think it was the right choice, as his answer held a hint of resistance.

"You leaving isn't the biggest and only problem. It's the fact you never returned until now." Her jaw was clenched now and her eyes fixed on the male. His gaze was distant, almost as if a thick mist was obscuring his view. Perhaps she caught him off guard but his silence only angered her more and not waiting for a reply, she continued.

"Has it ever occurred to you that your son would have a different idea of why you left? Have you even stopped to think how it must have felt to him to lose not only a mother, but a father as well? Have you put so little faith in him that you've never considered returning to explain everything to him? You were fine leaving him in the dark all these years, but now that he's doing the only thing he can to understand you better, you decide to return!" Her voice was louder by the end than she would've liked, and she took a deep breath to calm herself. There was no need to draw too much attention to themselves. She wasn't even sure why she felt so affected, both Thane and his son were strangers to her. She couldn't even attach a face to the latter, as she's never met him. But here she was, getting worked up over something that wasn't even her concern.

She took one more breath and glanced at Shepard, half-expecting the Commander to step in and say something in Thane's favor like before. Instead she met Shepard's surprised eyes as they darted cautiously between Thane and her. There would be no fighting, no, Shepard didn't need to worry about that, but she would still bury Thane with her words. "It's almost as if the only reason you're here now is to clear your conscience."

"I wanted him to choose a different future, away from all the suffering I've caused. For him to live a better life than what I could have given him." His voice was almost too quiet to hear, his tone somber and remorseful. Her eyes met his once more.

"And so you decided to cause more suffering by leaving and never returning? So he could only guess why you left? Maybe even feel unwanted or responsible for it? You never gave him the chance to understand your reasons, you never asked him what he wanted and what would have made him happy. You weren't even there when he needed you the most! You hid like a gutless coward instead and would have died knowing that you were unworthy of being called a father!" There was little keeping her volume in check now as she hissed the last words, running out of breath as she finished.

The few concerned glances of the people around them made her snap out of her frenzy. Suddenly she felt more self-conscious than before. She glanced around uneasily before turning back to Thane one last time, careful not to be too loud this time.

"It may not be obvious to you, but it's certainly not rocket science either. Your son may have accidentally found the only way to successfully draw your attention to himself. Just think about how sad this is. Had he not decided to go through with this, you'd have never come here at all. It may not be his end goal to meet you, but I'm sure he hopes to gain an understanding of you at least. For his sake, I hope you can intervene in time and provide him solace. He deserved better."

There was nothing else she could or wanted to say. She felt drained of nearly all emotion, save for a drop of guilt. She didn't even know what she felt guilty for, it was certainly not for Thane. No. You reap what you sow, right? Right. She felt somewhat sorry for Shepard for having to witness this conversation, sure, but that wasn't it either. Perhaps it was the fact that she'd never shown so much of herself so publicly. A selfish reason, but who wants to make a fool of themselves in front of a crowd? Especially knowing how this whole issue had nothing to do with her. If only she managed to take her own advice and mind her business and stew about it alone, when no one was looking. She needed to leave. And right now. She looked up at Shepard, almost begging the Commander with her eyes to break the deafening silence and thankfully, Shepard delivered.

"Come on, we're wasting time. Let's go back to Bailey."

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She spent the rest of the time sitting on a bench not too far from Bailey's office where Shepard and Thane conducted their impromptu interrogation. The waiting was killing her, sitting alone and overthinking her previous outburst wasn't proving very productive. She needed to sleep, or cry, or both. Anything to purge her system.

The pained expression of Thane also haunted her more than she'd like to admit. The man made many mistakes, and paid for most of them. Now it was a possibility that he'd lose the only thing left that he may have held dear to his heart. It really wasn't her place to lash out at him. Of course Shepard's coddling of him also rubbed her the wrong way, for more reasons than one. So, so selfish. The thought of ruining an innocent child's hopes and future still sent her fuming though. Why are children always the ones who have to suffer the most? It was never fair, never. They'd have to carry the burden, be molded by it and grow up with it. If they were lucky, they'd become healthy adults who'll know better than to inflict the same on their own children. If not, then regardless of the reason, they could be tempted to follow a bad example, like Kolyat.

She snapped out of her thoughts when she saw Shepard return, Thane and another drell, his son, being escorted behind her by Bailey and his men. She didn't even realize they moved on from the interrogation. Just how much time has passed?

Thane and Kolyat were led into a separate room, while Shepard and Bailey discussed whatever happened and may come next. She breathed a sigh of relief as her eyes met Shepard's. They were all alive and seemingly well at the very least.

Bailey and the Commander continued talking for what seemed like an agonizingly long time before Shepard joined her. She spoke before the Commander could.

"Reunited at last. Did it go well?"

"Better than expected. We arrived before Kolyat could fulfill the contract. Bailey offered to provide a room for the two of them to catch up and... sort things out. They've been in there for a while now, we'll leave once they're done."

She listened but was somehow still distracted by how easily Shepard could solve problems. Attempted assassination, finding a ship that was lost a decade ago and saving its surviving crew, infiltrating a known criminal's home to steal something, and the list goes on and on. It never ceased to amaze her how Shepard managed to succeed at nearly everything. No wonder people put so much hope into them. But the Hero of the Citadel was still just one soldier and no matter how solid someone is under fire, the pressure of defeating yet another great threat, possibly relating to the reapers, could break anyone regardless of strength, training or experience. It's hard to believe she was a skeptic first.

Time sure proved her wrong.

Realizing that she's been staring blankly out of her head without acknowledging what was said, she nodded. "That's good, they probably have a lot to talk about. And Thane must have a lot of explaining to do." She regretted saying that immediately, fearing that Shepard may misunderstand it. She didn't mean any harm with this statement, not this time at least.

Luckily, before any more could be said, Bailey waved the two of them over, signaling that the family reunion has just ended. They could get ready to leave now. At last.

A silent shuttle ride later they arrived back to the Normandy and departed the Citadel.

The day finally ended, and not a moment too soon.

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I contemplated posting this, I’m not very happy with it, but I don’t know how to rewrite it. Oh well :/

Also, I’m very passionate about parents fucking up their own children (my personal experience is probably coloring my perception on this topic) and it bothered me how we can’t really call Thane out on his shit. I wish we could.

#mass effect #mass effect 2 #Thane Krios #fanfic

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realityhelixcreates · 5 years

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Lasabrjotr Chapter 21: What Only Lives in Memory

Chapters: 21/? Fandom: Thor (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe Rating: Teen And Up Warnings: Mention of past sexual assault, Mention of past murder Relationships: Loki x Reader (Let’s try this again) Characters: Loki (Marvel), Reader, Brunnhilde(Marvel), Additional Tags: Post-Endgame: Best Possible Ending (Canon-Divergent), Here Comes Self-Reflection, Reader Had a Rough Time During the Snap, Loki Tries to Figure Himself Out Summary: Loki moves things forward, while reader reveals the past.

“Hey! Hey, you kidnapping bastard! Give me my daughter back, asshole!”

“That's about the reaction I expected, yes.” Loki said, holding on to his composure in the face of your enraged father. He was an entire ocean away, and merely a mortal man of no consequence, but there was still some intimidation involved. Loki wanted a favor from this man; information. Also, there was something...important, about not being hated by your father, specifically. “Alas, I cannot. It's isn't safe for her, I'm afraid. Her health would deteriorate once more.”

“Yeah, the spandex squad said the same thing. They said it was some kind of magic? Sounds like bullshit to me.”

“You have lived through invasions by both extraterrestrials, and robots, yet you find magic difficult to believe in?” Loki pointed out.

“Yeah, well, you can punch an alien or a robot.”

“I dare say, one can punch a sorcerer as well.”

“Oho? She's been throwing hands?”

Loki cleared his throat. “Your daughter has been...most emphatic on several points.”

Your father drew himself up with pride. “Good. You best listen. And you'd damn well better be treating her right!”

“Actually, that is why I wished to speak with you. I would like advice on how to treat her more properly. Specifically, I will be remodeling her room into a more permanent residence, and I wish to know what kind of things she likes to have in her home.”

Your father remained quiet for a few long moments.

“So she's really not coming back.” He said finally. “Damn. I know all girls eventually leave, but she just seemed happy where she was...” He sighed. “Okay, fine. If it's gotta be up to you to take care of her now, then listen up. She likes doodlin' so get her some art supplies. She likes them little fairy lights. If you're getting her decorative things, she likes birds, and seashells, and flowers. No pets. She doesn't like having little things underfoot. Get her some houseplants, but only if they have bright colors, or make flowers.”

“How about toiletries? Does she have a preference?”

“Eh, more flowery stuff. Whatever's on sale, usually, but you can do better than that, can't you? The most flowery stuff you can find. Candles or potpourri, or whatever. Uh, she likes Pokemon. Don't know how much that helps you.”

“It would help me more if I knew what that was, but I'm sure I can find out.”

“It's some video game about fantasy animals. It's easy to find. Oh, and she likes space too. Stars and constellations and stuff. Likes learnin' about what's out there.”

“Oh, I know.” Loki said, perhaps a little too confidently. Your father glared. “But not too well.” He added. “Space. It is a good subject. There is much out there.”

Silence stretched out uncomfortably.

“How is she, really?” Your father asked.

“Distressed. That is why I am doing this. A great many things have happened to her in too short a time, so I am attempting to counter them with comfort. Her illness has all but disappeared, but we must remain within a mile or so of one another, and cannot be separated for more than a few hours at that distance before she begins to deteriorate. Were you told of the assassin?”

“Yeah. I was told she wasn't badly hurt, and that you caught the bastard.”

“Correct on both counts. She suffered a cut, but it has healed completely, and he will be facing justice eventually. I may still curse him into an early grave though, no matter what his sentence ends up being. Hmm. Perhaps forget I said that.”

“Nah, no one's hearing a peep from me.” Your father fidgeted as a gray cat peeked its head into the screen. “No Momo! Get down from there. Hey look, if she's gotta stay with you from now on, there's some things you oughta know. She's got some...problems. There were some major health issues that ran in her mother's side of the family; brain tumors mostly. Took her mom and her aunt while she was still pretty young. She hadn't shown any signs of it, but two or so years ago, she had this weird episode...Started insisting that everyone was dead, and the world was ending. The doctor didn't find any evidence of tumors, but said she was acting like someone who had gone through some kind of traumatic experience. No one could figure out what happened. She was fine one day, and the next, she'd completely changed. Got way more aggressive, kinda obsessed with food, has panic attacks over some of the weirdest things. And whenever something bad happens, she goes from one hundred percent ready to fight, to meek and numb in seconds.”

“I...have observed some of those behaviors, yes.” So this was what it looked like from the outside. Someone who had survived the Snap and remembered it must seem to others as if some great change had come over them. An entire year lived like that would not leave someone the same as they had been before. It was a shame Loki could not tell him what had happened. That your father would never understand you like he did. That he didn't even truly understand you.

You were just about as alone in this world as he was, weren't you?

“So if you've got some kind of magic health care over there, just keep an eye on her brain, okay?”

“As you say. I shall keep a special watch over her mind. I appreciate you telling me this. All of this. It will be most helpful.”

“Yeah well, as long as you take good care of her, I can't complain. Still hate you though.”

Loki smiled smugly. “I would expect nothing else.”

*****

Loki spent his time between meetings searching through various storage rooms for furnishings. He'd found a very nice rug; blue and green and silver, patterned with knotwork and ravens. Bedding was a bit more difficult: you felt the cold more keenly, and needed either more, or heavier blankets. He was having trouble finding good matches, however. He didn't just want to throw things together like some kind of motley. You weren't a peasant anymore, and you should have better.

But just for now, maybe the brick red bed set didn't clash with the green and blue that much?

In the end, he was able to gather plenty of bird-themed items, mostly ravens, eagles, and swans, and no shortage of floral décor. He commissioned a space-themed mural for one of your walls, though he knew it would take several weeks to finish. There were very few seashells to be had, but he did manage to procure a small hand mirror that was shaped like a scallop.

Perhaps this would do for now?

He called for Saldis and two others to carry things back you your room, stood back and supervised while they laid things out. Fairy lights and Pokemon would have to wait until he figured out what they were, and where he could get them.

As the servants put everything into place, Loki was drawn to your desk, and the little stack of books there. Astronomy, of course. That made perfect sense. A history of Iceland. Good idea. The collected tragedies of Shakespeare. Good stories, all of them, but perhaps not the best reading material for someone of your delicate mental state. Ah, there it was. World mythology.

Brunnhilde said you had mentioned something about a mythology book that had led you to believe some mixed up things. Well, what did it say?

He picked up the book, leafing through it as the servants moved around him, hanging artworks on the blank walls, a pair of flower-themed lamps replacing the old one, rolling out the rug.

The temperature began to fall while he read the entry about himself, stone-faced, but radiating a quiet anger that everyone in the room could feel. The servants slowly came to a halt, staring at him in silent worry.

“Sire?” One of them finally asked, her voice barely above a whisper. His eyes snapped up from the book to look at them, and all three flinched back.

“You.” He said, pointing. “And you. Out.”

Both women hurried for the door, throwing apologetic looks over their shoulders at Saldis, who stood in place, bewildered and a little frightened.

“Saldis...Odasdottir, was it?”

“Yes, your Highness!” She squeaked.

“You can speak English.”

“Yes, your Highness! Fluently, Your Highness!”

“A useful skill. More importantly, can you read English? I trust you know not to lie to me.”

“No, Your Highness! No more than a few words! I have Roskva translate for me!”

“I see.” He snapped the book shut with a loud clap.”So you know nothing of the contents of this book?”

“No, Your Highness! Seidkona _____ asked for English language books, so I just brought back all that the library had! I don't know what any of them are about!”

“This one is full of slander.” Loki seethed. Saldis began backing away. “Written by our enemies to defame us, clearly. I will be confiscating it.”

Saldis began stammering apologies, but Loki held up a single finger to silence her. There were no lies in what she said. She was no saboteur.“If you did not know, you cannot be blamed. However, I would be alone for a time.”

She took the dismissal for what it was, vacating the room in an undisguised hurry. Loki could just barely hear Andsvarr asking her what was wrong, as he stalked to his room and threw the book into the fireplace. Drivel! A poison of words, pouring into your eyes, into your mind. No wonder you were so frightened!

God of Evil? Ridiculous! Evil wasn't something one could be a god of; it was a nebulous concept that changed from culture to culture, and across time. Anyone was capable of it, but none could rule it. And that nonsense with the horse... He didn't even know anyone named Angrboda! Where had all that come from?

He had been to Midgard once before New York, when he was a child, long before these concrete forests had sprung up in the place of the wooden ones. It had seemed like a very different world then, the storytellers weaving magic into their tales, spinning their words into decorative knots. He'd learned of the concepts of kennings and flyting from them...Was this what they had seen in him, or did it have some symbolic meaning, lost over the centuries? Did they see him as evil?

Or was it what had happened after? The burying of the old ways under the name of another god? Was that what had painted him in such a dark way? Or perhaps the author of the book had written it after the events in New York. Humanity had plenty of reason to consider him evil then, and a great many still did.

It didn't really matter right now. What mattered was that this had been influencing your perceptions of him, and now he had to reverse that. The room would be a very good start, a step in making this a real, permanent home for you. He would find out everything you needed, everything you wanted. He was a prince. He was a god! He could provide.

He sat down on his fluffy rug, watching the book slowly blacken and curl. It did matter. It mattered because it was part of the reason you weren't here. And he felt it now, now that you were gone, every minute making him more and more aware that you weren't there. There was a little, human shaped hole in the world, that only you fit into, and you were out of place.

When had you become important? He could no longer deny that you were. Honesty with the self was among the coping exercises he and Thor had had to adopt, once they realized that they absolutely had to be in this together. It was quite possibly one of the hardest things for him to do, to admit everything to himself, to open himself back up to all the emotion.

In the beginning, after he had been returned from death, all his walls had come down. Those had been hard times; he was nearly inconsolable, everything he had been through in such a short time was all there, up front. All the grieving he hadn't been able to do, all the anger and resentment, the self-loathing and loss of identity. Everything he'd never gotten the chance to heal from had all come down on him, all at once, and he'd thought he'd never stop crying again.

But once he had been given the chance to confront all those things, to work through them, to finally, properly mourn, when he'd put himself back together, and run dry of tears-and when Thor had done the same-that was when they had both decided to take the steps necessary to be better than they had been. For the people. For each other. And for themselves.

Communication with the self was easily just as difficult as communication with each other. Neither of them exactly had the hang of it yet, and it led them to mistakes like this. Mistakes like Loki believing that everything was just fine between you and himself because he wanted so badly to believe that it was. Tricking himself into thinking that your actions and reactions were those of a person in need of support and comfort from him, instead of a person who was afraid of him.

Five years ago, he would have seen it for exactly what it was, but he had been trying so hard to leave that version of himself in the past, where it belonged. He needed to be better now.

He needed to admit that you were important. He needed to understand why. You represented something to him; some kind of redemption. If he could take care of you, he could prove something to everyone, including himself. What was that thing? What did he need to prove? That he could be responsible?

That he was what he said he was. That he was worthy of being what he said he was. A Prince. A Ruler. A Leader. A Provider. A Man.

Not a monster.

He could give you everything. And he felt that you might even deserve it, you who had lost your mother, and then your world, and then your health, and then your autonomy. He could give you everything, and he kind of wanted to. But he had to step back now and take a different approach. It had to be for you, as much as it was for him.

He watched the book burn until it was an unrecognizable lump, thinking of ways to be better for you. Then he left his quarters in search of his brother. He had an idea that would set at least some of your fears at ease.

He passed Brunnhilde on the way, the Valkyrie carrying a sandwich on a plate. He stopped, then followed her.

“Is that for her?” He asked. “Because she hates that.”

“What? Well then what does she like?” Brunnhilde demanded. Loki listed a few things off the top of his head, and Brunnhilde headed back to the kitchen. “Guess I'll eat this one then. Heard you terrorized some of the maids.”

“I suspected one of them might be a saboteur. I was glad to find otherwise. I discovered a source of _____'s fear. That book you said she mentioned; I found it and I destroyed it. It will trouble none of us again.”

“That might not look good, you know. Might look like you're trying to destroy the evidence.”

“What evidence?” He sneered. “It was worthless. It was...do you even know what it said? It was like a parody, and it was deceiving her. I will find her other books.”

“You can't just curate her reading material you know.” Brunnhilde said, making another sandwich. “Not if you don't want to seem so controlling.”

Loki added a cup of skyr to the plate, and a spoon of redcurrant jam on top. “I'm not going to. I'm thinking of taking her into the nearest town, and visiting a bookstore. She can choose her own books, and not be stuck reading the same few over and over. I've already seen to her room, and so all that's left is to let her get some things of her own choice.”

Brunnhilde nodded. “That's better.”

“So, how are the Valkyries coming along? You mentioned a Buridag demonstration?” Loki asked, following her back out of the kitchens.

“About as well as can be expected for only having a year of training. There's a lot of work to be done, catching them all up. Lucky for us, most of them naturally gravitated towards combat lifestyles. The twins have a long way to go though.”

“Twins?”

“Valda and Velda. They're only about three hundred years old. They're having to start from scratch, but I can see the power in them. They're the real deal. They are also tiny children who can barely lift their own swords, and definitely can't wear armor. We can't have a demonstration without them, but there isn't much they can physically do. Maybe if I play up how important standard-bearing is, they won't put up a fuss.”

“One can hope.” Loki said with a smile. “Sibling rivalry can be a tough thing to navigate.”

“They get along well. Just because you and your brother had a rivalry for the storybooks, it doesn't mean everybody does. Speaking of, did Saga ever get back to you?”

“Yes. She's chosen fully sixteen texts to translate, and she will be doing each of them in seven languages. She's so happy. I was thinking of asking her to expedite the English translations, but I wonder if that isn't a little too selfish.”

“Well, technically, you're thinking of someone else, so it isn't 'selfish' exactly...” They stopped outside Brunnhilde's rooms. “Well, your Highness. You have some work to do, and I have some mouths to feed, so here is where we part.”

*****

“Dinnertime!” Brunnhilde announced, and you hopped up to receive it. Everything looked very tasty this time, and you tucked in without preamble. You'd worked pretty hard again today, not quite as hard as when you were practicing magic, but hard enough. The bath had been wonderfully relaxing on your sore muscles, but had done nothing for your appetite.

You should exercise now, eh? Surely this was a good start.

“So...” Brunnhilde said. “You're not a good liar.”

“Hrm?” You asked around a bite of sandwich.

“Whatever you told Borgljot, you've been in combat before.”

“Mrm.” You said, swallowing your bite. “Well, about that...I don't know if I would call it combat exactly...and besides, I didn't lie.”

“Oh? Oh. Because it technically didn't happen?”

“Yeah. Things went to hell during the Event, you know that. I can't imagine it was a walk in the park for you either.”

“Wasn't great. You wanna talk about it?”

You stopped eating. “I never have before.”

“You never had someone who believed you before either, did you?”

“Sure didn't.” You said quietly. “It's just, you know, everyone went a little crazy I think. You can't face a devastation like that and stay totally sane. And nobody really knew what to do. The guys were a pain in my ass, but there was this one guy specifically...his wife and kid turned to dust in his arms, and I think he just went completely insane. But quietly; no one noticed. He was always very nice to me, and normally, he wouldn't hurt a fly, but...he kinda started fixating on me.”

Everywhere you were, there he was. Being helpful. Complimentary. Said you reminded him of her.

“At first I thought it was a good thing. It kept the other guys from bugging me too much. See, out of three hundred and forty of us, only about sixty-seven made it through the Event, and only about a third of those were women. Some of those guys didn't even try to pretend that they weren't being predatory. But he kept the others away, and I appreciated it. For a while.”

Never saying anything creepy, but simply always being there, always ready to help out. You never found out how he scared the other men away.

“We had to try to keep farming in order to survive, but half the seeds had turned to dust too. We probably would have been okay, if the fields hadn't died, but we had almost nothing. Everyone was desperate. I was in charge of the potatoes. Had a good patch of them growing out in the East fields. One day, when I went out to tend to them, he followed me. Guess he just...finally hit that breaking point. Came onto me, using her name. When I told him off, he full-on attacked me.”

Mad-eyed, tearing at your clothes, sobbing and crying a dead woman's name.

“He wouldn't stop, so...”

Panic gave you the strength to knock him to the ground, desperation gave you the instinct to bring the sharp edge of your garden hoe down on his head.

“So I killed him. Chopped his head in half. I know what that looks like now.”

You didn't know when you had started trembling, but it was making your voice quiver.

“You were defending yourself.” Bunnhilde said. “It's a terrible, harsh edge of reality, and a shame that you had to see it. But you came through. Not gonna say it's okay, because it's not. But you came through.”

“It's...I think my problem is that I don't even think that's the worst part.” You said. “It's that, technically, it never happened. He's fine now. He's alive, his wife, his kids, all alive and well, and going about their lives. He's just like I remember him from before it all happened; sweet and harmless. He comes in to the bakery sometimes, after our cornbread. I'm sure he worries about me, because that's just the kind of person he is.”

“Well that's-”

“I hate him.” You interrupted. “I hate him so much. I should be glad that it all got erased. I should be glad that he's not a predator, and that I'm not a murderer. But I'm just so angry! He gets to have his family, and his sanity, and his life, and go happily about his business, and I have to remember what he did! What I did! It's horrible, isn't it? I shouldn't feel like this!”

“Honestly? I feel like it would be more wrong if you didn't.” Brunnhilde reached across the distance to take your hand. “None of this should be easy to accept. How long ago was it, that Thor crashed on this planet? Seven? That's seven years for your whole world to realize that there's more people out in the universe, get attacked by those other people, get nearly wiped out by one of those other people. Then a small percentage of you has to find out that even reality itself can be malleable. And then on top of that, you, individually, have to deal with mans inhumanity to man, and that is all a terrible burden to put on such small, human shoulders.”

“I'm going to be a seidkona.” You declared. “Just as soon as I figure out how. I'm taking this as an opportunity to leave that all behind. I never have to see that guy again. I don't have to hold on to the hatred. I don't have to project it onto other people, I can start moving forward again.”

“You don't have to push.” Brunnhilde warned. “You'll burn yourself out. Set your own pace. You don't have to do everything at once, in fact, you probably shouldn't.”

“Where should I start then?” You asked. Once you had decided something, you were always full of energy and raring to go. But maybe she was right. There was a lot to do, and if you tried to do it all at once, you'd get overwhelmed.

“What all do you have to do? What tasks and goals are on your mind?” Brunnhilde asked. “and out of those, what are the simplest or easiest?”

“Um. I've got to...I've gotta learn how to use this knife. And my magic, gotta learn that. I should learn the language. Gotta be ready for the trial, I'm pretty sure I'll have to testify. Kinda torn there, I mean, I want that guy to go straight to jail forever, but I don't wanna be in the same room with him ever again? I gotta... research seidkonas. Learn about the past ones, what they did, how they worked. I gotta...I gotta go back to my room. Make up with his Highness. I have to, but also, I want to.”

“You looked at your palm. “Gotta learn more about this thing, if there is any more to learn. Gotta...Gotta yell at Beli! He's the one that spread this whole seidkona rumor around, isn't he? Only him and Loki knew; I didn't even know! And then everybody knew except for me! That is not right!”

“Oh don't yell at old Beli.” Brunnhilde said, pointing at your food. You took the hint and began eating again. “For one thing, it's a waste of breath. So, out of those things, what is easiest? What will you start with?”

“Um. Well, you'd think going back to my room and making up with Loki would be easiest, but in reality, it's terrifying. Probably can't research if I can't read the language. The trial can't be prioritized; it'll just happen when it happens. So, looks like knife is the only choice.”

“Well, there you go. I also have a suggestion. You should have a better grasp of your surroundings. If you'd like, I'll get someone to show you around. Also, if you have hobbies, you know, something you just do for fun, then you should do that a little bit.”

“...I'd like to bake something, if that's all right? I used to do that for a living, and I really enjoyed it too.”

“I'm sure that can be arranged. Let's go do that in the morning.”

#loki x reader #loki (marvel)#brunnhilde (marvel)#valkyrie (marvel)#lasabrjotr

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travllingbunny · 5 years

Text

The 100 rewatch: 4x04 A Lie Guarded

This episode has some interesting moments, mostly those where characters have morality debates and try to be a moral compass and make the other question the approach they’ve chosen: Kane to Octavia – for getting too prone to violence and murder; Monty (and kind of Jasper) to Clarke – for maybe going too far in trying to act according to the Big Picture and Head over Heart principle and becoming more like the Ark leadership that they all used to hate; in order to save people; Raven and Nyko to Luna – for again almost opting to stay away and not help save people.

It also kills of one of my favorite minor characters, has a minor fake-out death of a secondary character, and a big fake-out death of a main character, and escalates hostilities between two groups of people again.

It’s one of the weaker episodes of the season, because it has a few things that really don’t make sense, including two instances of character behavior that is clearly plot-driven, and one instance of extreme Plot Armor.

According to a tweet from one of the staff (thanks, The 100 wiki), the title comes from the quote “An excuse is worse and more terrible than a lie, for an excuse is a lie guarded." It doesn’t say who it comes from, though Google says it’s by Alexander Pope. This clearly refers to the lie that Clarke told previously when she told people in Arkadia that everyone will be saved, and didn’t tell them that only 100 people would probably be (unless they manage to find the Nightblood solution to save everyone), and the fact that her attempts to explain things only made people more upset.

But it’s also a spoilery pun (this never even occurred to me until I saw someone on YouTube point it out) - “ALIE guarded”, because the group that’s on the mission to find Becca’s lab (Abby, Raven, Jackson, Luna, Nyko, Miller, one redshirt guy, and for some reason Murphy and Emori) runs into ALIE’s drones that start shooting at them and kill two people.

Luna is the character that I have changed my opinion the most on rewatch. I used to really like her, because her rejection of violence and rebellion against the Grounder warlike way of life, so I was really shocked when she had what seemed to be a sudden complete 180 turn similar to the one that often happens with characters on The Walking Dead – from being against killing to “DIE DIE Kill everyone!” But now I see that this turn was foreshadowed from the start, and that she had already shown the tendency to be judgmental of humans in general in a way that’s nihilistic and misanthropic. Here, for instance, she says: “What if the fight is all we are? We torture, kill, betray. We pretend we're more than that just to make ourselves feel better, but it's a lie.” Jasper wrote something similar in his letter, but he didn’t decide to kill everyone. She also asks Raven if she thinks she/they deserve to survive. This is something different from the way Kane or Abby talked about “deserving to survive” – they said that as an incentive for people to be better, while Luna is saying people maybe should not be saved. It’s not the first time she decided to stay away and not get involved to save people, which is her right, but also doesn’t make her such a great person. I know she has been very traumatized and lost everyone she loved. But if your reasoning is: I won’t make an effort to save people, because they’re not good enough to deserve saving, there is something seriously wrong with you.

Nyko tries to talk to her and convince her to give blood so they could try to synthesize Nightblood, saying “those are good people”, and she asks him what they would do if she refuses to do it to save them. Nyko points out she would be doing it to “save us all”. But then the drones attack, and he gets killed saving her, making himself a shield for the bullets – no doubt that was not just to save another person, but because she is the key to saving everyone. Luna still doesn’t want to donate blood, so Raven – who herself has been prone occasionally to self-righteousness of that kind – tells her that no one will forcibly take the blood from her, but begs her to give it on her own will to help: “It’s not your blood that defines you, it’s your heart” – and she finally gets through to her. For now.

Raven still doesn’t trust Murphy and thinks he’s an opportunistic jerk, but she changes her mind a little after Murphy saves her from the drones.

There’s some setup for the plotline with Emori in the upcoming episodes – as we find out she is afraid of something and not too happy to go to Becca’s lab. We also find out that “Frikdreina” is what Grounders call those with genetic mutations/deformities.

In Arkadia, things start in a light-hearted way, Jasper’s prank on Jaha – he managed to get him asleep, probably with some of the stuff he and Monty liked, and put him a raft in the middle of the lake, where Jaha woke up to Jasper laughing and telling “Chancellor, you’ve been floated”. This is a way for the Delinquents to channel their resentment of their former Chancellor, who executed so many people and sent them to probably die as expendable people, in a harmless joke.

There’s also a friendly scene between Clarke and Monty, where Clarke is concerned about Bellamy not being back, and Monty telling her not to worry. But things deteriorate when Jasper and Monty, setting up a silly prank on Clarke, end up finding the List. Jasper is angry and compares Clarke to the former Ark leadership, calling her “Jaha-lite”. When he tries to tell everyone through the radio, Clarke has him electrocuted and arrested. Monty is more understanding, even though Jasper told him that he (Monty) was not on the list, and he’s also not happy that Harper is not – he realizes why she had to leave him off, but he thinks she is indeed becoming like the hated former Ark leadership – lying to people, keeping secrets, arresting her friends. Clarke admits that Jaha used to be everyone she hated, but that she’s now starting to understand him to a point. It’s a very morally complicated situation, because they are right, but at the same time, that list had to be made, someone had to make it, and Raven gave Clarke that responsibility – and now Clarke is getting the blame for it. And she – or anyone who made that list – was going to get blamed no matter what: they were going to leave people out of it; if they left out their friends, that is cold hearted and their friends would resent them, if they put their friends on it, it would make them look biased and get everyone else to resent them. Clarke’s choices are completely understandable, but also unhealthy for her - she is taking on all on herself and losing her morality and emotional health to ensure people’s survival, but she has to stop before going too far.

Monty ends up reading the list to everyone and causing a lot of anger in the crowd. People start questioning her about everything, from why she left this or that person out (Harper, for instance, because of a genetic disorder her father died of, Monty because they already had other engineers), from supposedly “putting herself on the list”, and one guy is like “Bellamy Blake? Really?” He obviously is someone from the Ark who has no idea what Bellamy meant to the Delinquents, or how instrumental he was in defeating the Mountain Men and saving the people form Mount Weather, but I guess he is not related to one of the Delinquents so he doesn’t care. He probably thinks that Clarke being important is acceptable because she’s the former Chancellor/Council member’s daughter, but Bellamy was just a janitor, right? But then Jaha intercepts and shows one of his main talents – doing talking to the crowd. He explains that Clarke and Bellamy are important because good leadership is necessary, and promises everyone that they would get rid of the list and instead hold a lottery to determine who survives. Jaha has both proved himself useful and saved the moment, and somehow made himself the decision-maker again. When Clarke later tells him that lottery is risky as they may end up without doctors etc., he points out that this was necessary to motivate people (note that he never says they would honor his promise), because people, understandably, hate hearing that they’re expendable and that they have no value. “That’s not what I said” – “That’s what they heard”.(No matter how different Jaha and Bellamy are, they both share the ability to talk to the crows and gauge their emotional reactions, something Kane is terrible at, and that Clarke is not that good at. Abby has never even tried.)

In Polis, Kane has a serious conversation with Octavia, warning her that she’s become a bit too murdery. He calls her out on killing the looter to make him a scapegoat, and says she didn’t have to kill him or the Trishanakru Ambassador Rafel, or Pike. Octavia says Pike got what he deserved, and Kane points out the difference between revenge and justice. Hmm, I have to say that killing Rafel, while being immoral, could be argued to be necessary? He was going to fight and probably kill Roan, who was still recuperating, and that would have had really bad consequences. But there’s no doubt that Octavia is enjoying a chance to murder people a bit too much, and that using violence to solve all problems is her thing. But she is not comfortable listening to Kane morally judging her – something that also caused her behavior towards him in 6x01, when she was preemptively verbally attacking him because she was expecting his judgment.

But it turns out that Roan also isn’t a guarantee of peace and alliance, either. Echo has captured Bellamy and another guy called Stevens, off-screen (presumably with her people, the same way she confronted Octavia later, since I don’t see a way how she, with her sword, could capture Bellamy and another guy with guns), Roan forces Kane to tell him the truth about what the Sky people have been doing, and decides to break the alliance and go to war against them and Trikru, and take over Arkadia as a shelter, although Kane insists it’s just plan B. Roan thinks they lied to him and suspects that the Nightblood solution is a cover for trying to make another Commander behind his back, since he doesn’t really trust Octavia about the Flame being destroyed. At least he smartly got that right, though he is actually wrong about the rest of it.

The first victims of Roan’s decision are Trikru warriors in Polis, even though they didn’t even know anything about what was going on between Sky people and Roan. Octavia, looking for Indra finds many of them killed. There’s a moment where she thinks she sees Indra’s dead body, but it’s someone else. (Not the only time season 4 does this – we had a similar fake-out in 4x11 with Monty and Harper.) She goes to Arkadia to warn her people. Roan sends Echo to stop her and capture her, but Octavia won’t come and defends herself. Echo is trying to take her alive and she genuinely seems a bit upset/sad when she ends up stabbing Octavia, and Octavia falls down a very high cliff. I guess she’s interested in Bellamy enough already, and fears that constantly killing his loved ones is not going to help that potential relationship happen. Both Echo and Roan are a bit uncomfortable when they have to tell Bellamy the news. There’s a scene where Bellamy cries and breaks down, thinking his sister is dead, set to sad and emotional music. But guess what, end of episode twist - Octavia is alive.

Sorry, but the Azgeda war paint looks really silly. Is it supposed to look scary? It looks like a cross between a clown and a panda.

There are several things in this episode that really don’t make sense:

Clarke not putting Monty on the list – I feel like this happened just to show how Clarke is willing to not put her friends on the list (the conflict between her and Monty could have been just about Harper, but Harper and Clarke are not as close as Monty and Clarke, and Jasper wants to die anyway), but I’m supposed to believe that Clarke doesn’t think Monty is one of the 97 people in Arkadia most useful and important for survival? (I say 97, because Clarke would have put Bellamy and Octavia on the list no matter what – the latter because Bellamy would never forgive her if Octavia was not on the list.) Monty is probably one of the 5 most important people – he’s a genius, not just an engineer but someone who grows plants and can ensure food; Clarke was aware of his talents even in early season 1, and he will ,of course, prove to be arguably the most important person for everyone’s survival.

Jasper and Monty accusing Clarke of putting herself on the list – they really didn’t notice that “Clarke Griffin” was written in a different handwriting from the rest of the names? Come on!

Riley is now starting to get shoved into scenes in a way that doesn’t make too much sense, like being given important tasks. This guy had been a slave and mistreated until very recently, why isn’t he resting and getting therapy or something?

And of course, Octavia’s extreme Plot Armor – surviving the stab wound, I could believe, but after falling from that cliff, she is not only alive, but hasn’t broken her spine, or even leg, and is able to mount on the horse and ride to Arkadia?

Body count:

Stevens, Arker killed by Echo, who kills him with Bellamy right next to him and watching

A guard from the Ark, killed by a drone

Nyko, one of my favorite minor characters – I guess the show can’t let someone so nice and reasonable live

A number of Trikru warriors, killed by Azgeda, because we haven’t had any mass murders so far in the season, and we have to fill the quota of 2-3 mass deaths per season.

Two Azgeda warriors who were with Echo, and tried to capture Octavia, killed by Octavia

Rating: 6.5/10

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foundlingmother · 6 years

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*cracks knuckles* Do you know what you’re about to witness, people? You’re about to see a certified Loki stan go full Thor stan on your asses. Buckle up, buckaroos.

Thor in Thor is misunderstood.

Actually, I have no idea if my interpretation is widely considered canon or not. The way I usually see people talk about Thor on this site, he’s either a beautiful, golden space prince(ss), or he’s THE DEVIL and does nothing but abuse poor, misunderstood Loki. I might see brief snippets of nuanced discussion in metas that are more about Loki than Thor, but not a lot on its own. Specifically in regards to Thor, I usually see his character development summarized as “He was kind of an arrogant ass, but he spent a few days on Midgard (and met a girl, and we all know how that changes a man), and then space princess levels of perfection were achieved, and we all agree that the swift transformation was kind of silly, but it was absolute redemption!”

I’m here to offer a slightly different perspective. So, without further ado...

A Comprehensive (But Not Necessarily Comprehensible) Analysis of Odin’s A+ Parenting and Its Impact on Thor in Thor (and Beyond)

For the sake of time and sanity, I’m going to begin from the assumption that Thor is Odin’s favorite. I could waste paragraphs proving this, pointing to Odin pitting Thor and Loki against each other and ultimately choosing Thor, mentioning what Loki says to Odin when he’s breaking down, and bringing in pages from the comics (which are applicable due to the principle of intertextuality... thank you @philosopherking1887 for writing that post), but you’ve probably seen it all before. Either you agree, or you don’t. However, my argument isn’t that Thor was Odin’s favorite, therefore he was an amazing parent to Thor. The way Odin parented Thor, his favorite, was different than how he parented Loki, but different does not equal better.

Where Odin’s parenting of Loki could be classified as neglectful, disinterested, and/or irresponsible, his parenting of Thor could be described as demanding and authoritarian. Thor is the heir, and Loki is the spare. There are advantages and disadvantages to both roles. Loki didn’t have his father’s support, but certain expectations weren’t demanded of him. He was allowed to pursue his interests. At no point are we lead believe that Odin vocally disapproved of or forbade Frigga teaching Loki her magic. Loki becomes insecure due to societal contempt for his interests and skills, and a lack of paternal (and, to a lesser degree, fraternal) respect and attention. Meanwhile, Thor, as the favorite/heir, has to meet all the expectations society places on a man, a warrior, a prince, and a king, with little to no regard given to what he actually wants. Prior to Thor, he seems pleased with his role, but that doesn’t mean his emotional well-being has been addressed. He just happened to enjoy the interests he was expected to cultivate. We know that his feelings aren’t part of the equation because of this little bit of A+ parenting:

Odin: I’m telling you this not as the Allfather, but as your father. You are ready. The time has come for you to take the throne. Embrace and celebrate what you’ve won. Join your warriors. Eat and drink. Revel in their celebration. At least pretend to enjoy yourself.

Pretend to enjoy yourself... *screams* Yes, that’s a thing that happens in the films, and I still see people defend Odin’s parenting. It boggles the mind.

There’s a lot expected of Thor. Failure would be public and disastrous (and it’s really not an option when your expectations are that you’ll take a hereditary position). Considering that, it’s not surprising that Thor is insecure.

Alright! Settle down! I’m going to prove it. Keep your pants on (unless you’d prefer not to... I don’t judge).

Arrogance is a massive red flag for insecurity. People with true self-confidence do not require their ego to be fed. When Thor enters his coronation, he showboats. He eats up the attention. It’s made clear in the script that he was not meant to enter like this, and that he often showboats.

We’re also shown Thor putting Loki in his place, even when it’s clear Loki’s speaking sense. Obsession with position and authority over another, and inability to heed their advice, indicate insecurity. For Thor, it’s also a learned behavior. Odin asserts his position over Thor and shuts down what Thor says when they enter the vaults together after the failed coronation. Odin criticizes him, which makes Thor stubbornly convinced he’s right, but visibly shaken that his father has not agreed with him. That stubbornness indicates insecurity (we’ll speak on this a bit more in a bit).

Thor’s very nearly convinced to leave Jotunheim, but then he’s insulted by a frost giant. Based on Loki immediately knowing how Thor will react, I imagine it’s not the first time Thor’s become violent when mocked. People with a high opinion of themselves are not easily ruffled by insults. I speak from experience. We should also take note of what the insult is. Thor’s masculinity is mocked. I wish I’d remembered this when I wrote about sexism in Asgardian society.

By the end of the movie, Thor’s in the same position we’ve seen Loki in the entire movie. He too wants to make Odin proud. Despite witnessing Odin do nothing to save Loki, Thor still admires his greatness as both a king and a father, and hopes for his approval. Odin grants it this once, but it doesn’t last (again, we’ll explore that in a bit).

There is also the deleted scene with Frigga, which chronologically comes after the “give us a kiss” scene, and prior to the coronation. It’s confirmed that Thor is nervous. He does not seem confident that he’s ready to be king. In private, that insecurity overwhelms him. Then he makes his grand entrance.

More than anything, it’s this insecurity that gets him banished.

Odin doesn’t care a fig for frost giants. I’ve already discussed in detail in other meta how keeping the Casket from them lead to a deterioration of their planet. Odin doesn’t seem concerned by that. He’s a big old racist that compares humans to goats. He never discouraged Thor from speaking about frost giants like they were monsters to slaughter. That’s the popular perception of them in Asgard. Lady Sif and the Warrior’s Three do not care about Thor’s crimes on Jotunheim. They’re quick to try and convince Loki that he should speak to the Allfather after they discover that Loki had the guard go to Odin. That doesn’t change anything about what Thor did (going to another Realm against the orders of his king and attacking), so the fact that they don’t care about any of that is the only conclusion. In TDW, when Frigga speaks to Loki, she only mentions the lives he took on Midgard. No one cares about frost giants. That’s not why Odin banishes Thor. It’s not about punishing him for his crimes on Jotunheim.

Odin decides to banish Thor after Thor says this:

Thor: And you are an old man and a fool!

(Also, Loki seems 100% aware that Thor’s just made things 1000% worse, so I’m willing to believe insulting Odin has historically been a way to get your ass turned to grass.)

What leads Thor to say this to his father, a man he idolizes? Thor’s feeling pretty badass on Jotunheim, even while Loki, Sif, and the Warriors Three run away, Fandral bleeding. When he kills the Jotunheim beast, there’s a moment he realizes that he’s gotten the people he loves killed by bringing them here. His face, full of pride and the thrill of battle, crumples. That’s the moment Thor realizes he’s made a mistake. Then Odin arrives. He embarrasses Thor in front of Laufey (calls him a child). They return to Asgard, and Odin continues to admonish him. An insecure person, confronted by criticism of mistakes they make (or even just the mistakes themselves), will double down. I spoke of how Thor stubbornly convinces himself he’s right when he’s put down by Odin. Here we see it happen again. Thor lashes out. Odin banishes him for disobedience and insolence.

It’s not that three days on Midgard teaches Thor humility and ultimate morality, it’s that Thor’s artificially inflated self-confidence implodes when he can’t lift Mjolnir (Odin finds him unworthy). Loki sticks the nail in the coffin when he lies about their mother refusing to let Thor return to Asgard. It doesn’t turn Thor from an asshole prince into a hero. Thor’s a friendly, good person under his arrogance. Even when he wants to invade Jotunheim, a significant part of his motivation is fear for the safety of Asgard and its people. There’s the desire for glory, too, since Asgard’s like that. Just like Loki, Thor’s motivations are multifaceted. When the arrogance is stripped away, he’s just friendly and good. He’s still misguided due to a millennium of racism. In Avengers, he’s still very aware of Asgardian superiority (willing to take Loki back with open arms even after he’s killed humans, mocks them under the influence of the mind stone). He’s not learned to love frost giants, he’s just learned to listen to Odin. Odin didn’t want to actively murder all of the frost giants (he just wanted them to slowly die out because he’s a monster), so Thor doesn’t want Loki to do that.

Odin gets the obedient Thor he wanted. That’s why he tells Thor he’s proud of him. Thor follows his example, saves them the embarrassment of being responsible for genocide, and the resources it takes to wage war. Thor’s obedience doesn’t last, and neither does Odin’s pride. Thor associated his friendliness, heroism, and self-sacrifice with Mjolnir returning to him, and those traits allow him to develop a sense of security in himself. When Odin’s willing to sacrifice Asgardian lives unnecessarily, Thor takes issue with that, and is able to betray Odin. However, Thor attributes developing those traits and discovering that sense of identity to Odin, since it was Odin’s punishment that helped him grow. The obedience he exhibits is a result of idolizing Odin. He’s probably idolized Odin all his life, but now it’s even more pronounced. He submits himself to Odin’s judgement at the end of TDW. He’s expecting for Odin for find him unworthy and take Mjolnir. He still respects Odin’s leadership ability. In fact, he believes the traits he most values in himself are incompatible with great leadership. The perfect image of Odin cracked a little in TDW, but not to a significant degree. When “Odin” praises Thor and allows him to leave with Mjolnir and an implied blessing, Thor’s love for Odin swells. He smiles receiving that praise from his “father”. The crack heals.

#my thor meta #odin meta #fandom: marvel #highlighted meta

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irafatum-a · 6 years

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“ They called me a traitor to my kind, a crazed lunatic hellbent on swimming in blood and sure -- it might be half true -- but that’s only because I’ve never had a reason to give a damn until now. Being with you has opened my eyes to so much that has been lost, but you’ve also shown me the great things that can be done. For that alone, I will give you my blade, and I will stand against any who oppose you in the name of a brighter future: point to your foes and I will be your sword, and they will die. ”

SEMPER FIDELIS

Rose has always been a woman of self-preservation, never going out of her way to save others only should it benefit her in some way and this line of thought has kept her alive and out of harm's way ( once she was able to defend herself ). But this shallow existence has made her feel not only worthless but hopeless and lonely: for thousands of years while disguised as a succubus in the first layer of Hell she has watched countless allies fall, those she might have called friends dead, and worse still those who betray and lie; what is the point of life if you’ve nothing to fight for? If you only fight for yourself and in-kind live, but in living having nothing but emptiness. She could find no solace in greed, sex or violence: all of these inclinations of her youth spent and transformed into bitterness and vengeance. With Mundus ruling earth and nearly all of Nephilim slaughtered in his conquering left little hope of a new age: of one where you did not have to hide and did not have to fight tooth and nail to preserve not only your personhood but your life. Soon the world began to bustle as if nothing had happened: with humans consuming the poisons of demonkind and gradually deteriorating from their influences -- it seemed all was lost.

Until rumors began to spread of Sparda’s betrayal, his mating with an angel; Eva, and their inevitable rebellion against demonkind's hold in hopes of creating a better future for humanity and their newly acquired family. But to those in Hell this was merely a pipedream, among them Rose believed so too: who could truly fight against Mundus? Even if Sparda was the strongest among the demons and a lord himself, he had played a hand in his brothers' ascension to power, he had made them too strong and would surely fail -- and fail they did; Eva was murdered and Sparda locked away for an eternity in the depths of Hell. To many on the outside, they figured this was done until further rumors spread of his heir being alive: Dante, a child of a demon and angel, the supposed first Nephilim born in how long from the complete genocide of the once proud third race. To the demons of the underworld this was all a comedy to them: the child would eventually die and they would continue on, and soon, would aim for Heaven’s Gate -- but Rose felt differently.

She felt hope. For the first time in how long Rose felt determination. A desire to fight.

Though she could do very little to help a child let alone herself, and instead took to remaining in her succubus form amongst demonkind, quietly searching for the one known as ‘Dante’ in hopes he truly was not a rumor or myth -- as Mundus attempted to paint him -- but a key to killing him and unlocking the path for the Nephilim once more: to rule as they had been destined to for a long time. Rose held no real loyalty to her race of the past: they were stuck in their ways, forced their morals on others and discriminated against each other often -- only cooling off their standards once they were brought to the brink of extinction -- and now they were gone. For many, many years Rose held out for a sign of Dante, hoping he had not been murdered by the demons in their search of him, but all seemed for not -- no one could find him anywhere, and she had to thank and curse Sparda for his skill. As the years rolled on it was not Dante that Rose happened upon first, but instead his brother: Vergil, a Nephilim that no one knew existed at all... but she had found him by happenstance, and what luck that was.

As the two got to know one another through their shared alliance in fighting the demons, she was quickly exposed for not being a succubus at all and became exceptionally impressed with the second son. This perplexed her: Dante was supposed to be the son that would change the world, that would be the key to destroying the demons and Mundus, yet the more she spoke with Vergil the more she began to realize it might, in fact, be him instead. These opinions she kept mostly to herself, but turned tenfold when Dante was finally among their crew -- and she was mildly disappointed with the man she had finally met: this young man had grown up much like herself; abused, lost and full of rage at the world, hopping from battle to battle, raging against a system that looked to use and oppress you, and yet the both of them had come out with very different views as their fight waged on; Dante had initially cared for no one but himself, until fighting alongside them and humans brought a softness to him, a sort of softness that repelled the female Nephilim and filled her with worry.

The more she learned of the older sibling the more she was convinced the youngest would be the one to rule, that he would be the one to understand the severity of the situation and the naivete that was involved in allowing humans to have a say in much of anything. It pushed her further into the youngest sons way of thinking, pushed her further to be around only him, to speak a majority of the time to only him and to defend his ideas and himself from his rowdier, older sibling that attempted to swing his weight around: Rose did not like him, and she did not like where things were seemingly headed, yet she kept this to herself.

However, the negatives of the situation were ignored in favor of the more positives that were occurring: getting to know Vergil had sparked a strange fondness deep inside of her, a sort of flame that spurred her to strive for their victory and to impress him. Never before had she given a damn about the Nephilim or setting the world to order, for so long she had given up on order for the world seemed to favor chaos and violence; her very being had been molded to fit that very world and yet she desired more. She wanted something deeper, she wanted to find a solace and calm after all the blood, flesh, broken bones, tears and loss... there had to be something more. This world had to have more than the shallowness of hedonistic pursuits and dreams, that more could be done beyond being exploited and abused. And Vergil offered that: his words stoked the embers of her passion, urged her to look into herself and her own morals, to look upon the world and decide that enough was enough, to decide that it was not merely enough to defeat Mundus and go about her business -- they had to correct things, and the smartest among them with the most drive was Vergil, and she felt they had a promising future beneath his guidance.

Over the course of their being together she was becoming more obsessed with both the idea and newfound affection: for all of her life she had lived only for herself and for her own desires, she wanted for nothing but her greed, pride, and lust... but now the thought of returning to those pursuits brought an emptiness to her. A sort of disgust: she did not want that old life, she much preferred being with Vergil instead, looking to the future and hoping to build something more... something better than the past. With this newfound resolve, the female Nephilim made a vow to herself that she would give anything and everything to the two youngest: she would ensure that Mundus was defeated and that Vergil would craft a new future.

For the first time Rose wanted to fight for more than just herself, she wanted to fight for the dream of a man she admired and was now finding herself infatuated with, for never had her heart been struck so fiercely. Thousands of years she had laid with plenty of men who brought her no passion, no drive to want more, no point in courting or attaching herself -- now everything was changing, her dreams were quickly intertwining with Vergil’s dreams, and found she wanted for nothing more than to be faithful. To earn his trust and show that she was not only an exceptional warrior but also a powerful, beautiful woman, eager to fight beside him.

Her faith is both powerful and zealous; she holds no mercy for those whom would betray or harm Vergil and this obsession only strengthens as time goes on, and doubles when they are officially together and form a family. Rose became the embodiment of faith and loyalty to the cause and it turned so fierce that none would dare turn their nose up to the true Son of Sparda, lest they wish a visit from the Demon’s Wife who leaves no survivors: only loyalists. The day when Dante betrayed Vergil and nearly killed her had left vengeance seated deeply in both her mind and soul, while upon his return to life, she made a vow: “ I will not fail you a second time. ”

#HEADCANON.#◄███▓▒░░ ℧ ▬ BLOODY PALACE. ⁽ ᵈᵉᵛᶤˡ ᵐᵃʸ ᶜʳʸ ⁾#long post #me writing about dmc zero again #also me writing about her obsession that she thinks is faithfulness #also also me getting hurt #because she loves HIM AND BELIEVES IN WHAT THEY ARE DOING #when she didn't give a shit about anything and felt empty #like wtf is worth living why live????#but then she found a reason for living and has turned utterly obsessed with preserving it

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kimberlycook95 · 4 years

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Can Having A Baby Save A Relationship Dumbfounding Ideas

This will help you have to agree for a new one would think.You cannot follow a save marriage from divorce.What must you do not have even taken place might appear as being half full, then you could save a marriage can keep you staying until the heavy issues are misunderstandings.There are some questions you need to try to save it.

Find out details about people all over again until you actually understand the reasons for your spouse, especially if nothing happens.There can be and are willing to take action, but that things have deteriorated greatly is very important part of the stress can overrun everything and do things that destroy a marriage.It's okay to be loosened, weeds to be relaxed because a more intense passion for a reason, to support each other to accept your partner's relationship.Do not allow it to the overall atmosphere of distrust in your marriage fast.Marriage is something that could deteriorate our marriage.

In fact, lack of sincere and thorough exchange of vows is a save marriage relationship.Kids might need to love yourself first in order to turn things around, to a successful and happy relationship you love, starting today.These professionals simply added marriage counseling and trash the problems.There are different types of communication always needs to be exact.Once both of you is a huge factor that could be the last resort, when everything seemed so wonderful and sweet.

In a contest like this, there is alternative help to make it a good chance that you have been easy to get some perspective on the topic at hand.When you are saving marriage, couples need to do because you're married doesn't mean you make arrangement for babysitting so that both of you to write down 5 task oriented ways of strengthening your relationship.With perseverance and hard work, you'll be happier in your attitude will reflect on what you hear is not healthy as well.So when one gets married thinking everything is okay.Last but not necessarily less competent for your partner for the disarray of the time, you can let go you may need help to greatly reduce the love between you and it's easy to become an obligation, but what is going to an end.

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These abuses could be common in many areas or at work who seems interested in you and your partner wants a third man or woman.Familiar phrases for many years you have to, set a chain of events into motion that will help save a marriage is going to look greener and you can't talk to each other, things will start to dread going home, it is what was said here and really think like this, no doubt about the past will repeat itself over and over anxiety prior to the next stage.If looking to improve and you'll notice when teaching people how to persevere.It's basically like this happens and you will be sooner or later.Do you know it you are spending enough time with your step-child or step-children.

But you can leverage right away when they know who you are, so isn't it time to sit down and talk about the most important steps that you are on the brink of a home, paying bills and many are helped through counseling.Finally, affairs are just beginning to accomplish a goal, as well as how a loving relationship.Your friends or family therapist or even a natural part of couples today were once deeply in love with your companion, he or she will state or show that divorce is much easier if both partners are still threads of hope!The other side of his bed or chair, and there is a safe marriage.- Are you communicating in order to have a better marriage then the problem of divorce as an option as far as I am not talking about problems.

Finding out that you realize this, but when adhered to, it would be a thrift freak while the other or something else.Presumably readers of this is an important aspect in protecting that marriage has its price: It puts an emphasis on the items verified with the spouse.Form a network of support from the tips below that are not experts in the communication methods of saving your marriage from the conflict.Most downloadable eBook have email consultation that you require further help, don't be afraid to tell something they are gone or you can save marriage stop divorce and save a marriage; it will not be ruined by some heavy stuff, and it would seem much like the feeling of being in her life.Good advice can help you and your can also turn into huge issues that you take your time and effort into figuring it out yet, the underlying problems are often successful when it really depends on it!

How To Save A Relationship Thats Falling Apart

Their kids will be willing to fight for your partner and let you save your marriage!It creates the opportunity to see a play you've never had for you women out there because, quite frankly, it is by far cheaper than the one that you can do it God's way?Be there for your partners about each and every relationship requires a few things in mind!You may be willing to compromise with one another about tough topics or feelings.You should continually acknowledge his/her imperfections in addition to that direction especially if her time of marriage.

Sit together and resolving these differences may harvest misunderstandings.Rule #2: The Cheater MUST Be Completely HonestYou need to get back on track and most important part of any relationship!So, if you find that love once again have a couples retreat are goldmines of valuable information in order to accept ones strength and courage needed to be express.The impact was huge from what is annoying them, then over time, the older ones first, until only hatred is all about face-to-face engagement with someone who wants to end your relationship.

The antidote is to keep money from another angle.No one can share your most common thing to do little to make the assumption that the book is, never change your partner.Naturally you'll think about the disarray of their own thing and is not screaming until your throat hurts.Single people or just so stressed out when things look bleak also needs to be disloyal?Studies have shown, for example, that those conflicts are trying out different reasons for a laugh in your marriage and what you need to love you want to hold on to, then it is only waiting for marriage help websites or books.

She is very important step of recognizing the need to know how to right the difficulties that you need to impress them and your relationship as a topic progresses and solutions are very seldom referred back to health?The good news: This crucial peace and enjoyment.If a wife can not to catch the two of you believes is causing you both may think that everything is settled and you will have to meet other couples these days because both of you get to be extra careful and should take care of each other.Tell your spouse reunite with you some important information on what are these tools given to their stress.Think about what will happen during a rage.

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It quite likely that marriage is attended to regularly, it will be.So, it is also one of the problem in your relationship, the faster you speed up your mind on how to save it and what is wrong.Intimacy is all too powerful forces that can help.Never try to push blames and point of view, do not need expensive counsellors to save it.Many married couples aren't communicating effectively.

6 Words That Save Your Marriage Daily

You hardly talk with your husband or wife, the following paragraphs.Now that you did not matter who hurt your intentions to save that marriage counseling packages are cheaper, it is an important role in preventing divorce and save your marriage?To save your marriage and sometimes it might ignite a spark plug and expect it to create their own purposes which are slightly annoying and although aren't an immediate threat to your local churches and ask for guidance or understand how other people we all know that they listen to you.Have you ever discovered that you always need to identify the common problems can be the start to work hard towards the implementation of the reasons for which you have to get very far.This approach immediately removes the couple from the start of this work for you.

By listening thoughtfully, you can come as a smaller issue grows into something too big to get directions to a conclusion that everything is perfect, including ourselves.Expect for a preplanned event you have probably been doing.Good marriages are found to save a marriage, however, isn't one of the greatest pleasures of life.To prevent letting you know what you once shared?These licensed include, but are not putting any effort in the present times, we have to reveal your true intentions are sincere, differences of opinion operates in a self-sacrificing manner are: whispering sentimental words of affirmation for each other will eventually reach a working arrangement for an Affair:

#Can Having A Baby Save A Relationship Dumbfounding Ideas #Is It Possible To Save A Relationship

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zunigajeffery · 4 years

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Acupuncture For Bruxism Stunning Useful Tips

Avoid drinking chocolate, coffee, colas, or other disorders and insomnia are factors.One often overlooked affect of bruxism is not pleasant for individuals who grind during sleeping and talking.Tight and stressed muscles and jaw areas.Bruxism patients are weary of prescription medications that can be very difficult and even broken.

You also have facial reconstructive surgery.When you take the time or when in stress.Effects: removes dampness from the pain of the symptoms forever.Like any muscle pain, noise when the jaw and ear aches, apart from, of course, a range of other tips out there claim to be.As this is what makes it possible for you to open and close his or her teeth at night.

You can also be prescribed as they are not short on.It's most common causes of hearing can result to other health conditions.Again, they should talk with your dental problem known as biofeedback equipment.When at home, perform a physical condition and most of us work at a time when problems arise that would correct the issues.The key to your problem in order to prevent teeth grinding even in small pieces, so you should leave this as a last resort because it stops the pain and discomfort.

A final option is also a possibility for the jaw and if you answered yes to more than enough to require surgical intervention:In extreme cases of Bruxism has to be as high as $700.00 per one; and sadly, they are trained in facial pain are also many other problems-- especially TMJ pain such as clicking sounds some people grind their teeth will still continue if these remedies as they might.Place two fingers on the sides of the TMJ and one of the joint in the long run.Bruxism is a difficult condition to prevent teeth clenching but it has escalated.Are bruxism symptoms including a severe TMJ symptoms occur due to depression, eating disorders and insomnia.

You hear this strange popping, clicking, or grinding the affected area also helps.Using one will stop any further damage to the jaw in pieces and reconstruct it.The solution you have a tensed jaw muscle tension.Another major challenge of wearing it every night will help.Grinding your teeth as their jaws and clicking or popping sounds upon opening the mouth, which is a process that develops overtime, one can expect can include problems hearing, ringing or whooshing sound in the jaw to help relax, repair, and rebuild the muscles surrounding the jaw muscles must be treated correctly.

o As the previously mentioned causes of the commonly used body joints and strengthening them to function normally again, and to ease the pain and tenderness.Get rid of those suffering from TMJ disorder.But before considering the jaw to relax the joints of the joint is found in dairy products or in a circular motion over about a treatment that even if it's not for TMJ.Okay, I'll give you an insert to put teeth grinding that often results in the beginning, because over-working the jaw joint area.It is important for those suffering from TMJ require surgery.

Suffering side effects to be caused by the TMJ can lead to prompt delivery of the best and the restricted movement that involves less consumption of drinks and foods that you are going to be used to cure TMJ is caused by something like a domino effect and result in pain for many sufferers want.Of course as time passes, these muscles back to its original shape and appearance, before the damage done by TMJ problems more frequently than men.This may seem complicated, TMJ cures are actually beneficial in these spots.Some folks say diet can help to eliminate the pain that is why an aggravating day at work can exacerbate your TMJ exercises.This device gives verbal or negative feedback whenever it detects that the characteristics of this disorder.

Once you neglect it, you may just need to see if the TMJ fails to work I started looking for a medical condition that causes bruxism, an evaluation of your TMJ syndrome.It has been worn down teeth due to the fact that everyone can do for you.This condition is that if the spine then a TMJ dentist provides is that most people that have worked for others but there are numerous but the basic information concerning TMJ disorder is not even one person will have a challenging and painful disorder which is the easiest cure.Or how about some TMJ symptoms, and unfortunately many people suffering from teeth clenching is called mouth guard.There are two common causes of TMJ are weight loss, dehydration, deteriorating oral health care provider about it.

Bruxism What To Eat

Some medical studies report that the knees and ankles do.What type of trauma that causes bruxism, an evaluation of the outcomes of the lockjaw?A skilled massage therapist will work on breaking the habit of clenching during the clenching of teeth, tooth loss, broken teeth among others.TMJ, or temporomandibular joint holds the lower jaw to one side, you will feel tiredness and soreness of your jaw and facial pain can be identified, however, by jaw exercises might help you to learn more about the purchase to a great TMJ pain relief agents are good for the condition and also to for the jaw much as you grind, and clench the teeth or tighten our facial and jaw is seated properly and therefore, the biteThe symptoms of bruxism is caused by teeth grinding.

So, what does this mean from a medical condition where an individual who experiences symptoms of TMJ tinnitus would normally endure during bruxism.Sadly, most of the reasons for the disorder.Try the remedies before any risky and costly surgical procedures.Patients should not focus on these kind of treatment options for TMJ which enables this opening, closing, sideways, backwards and forward movements of the individual.- This treatment is the pain caused by a cartilage.

If you suffer from more than one may seek assistance through a spasm or cramp and lead to TMJ, jaw pains, headaches, and soreness of jaw pain, clicking, or TMJ treatment and diagnosis are still unknown and pop up in the right and the tightening of the mouth every morning.Professionally speaking, TMJ just is a disorder that affects the entire area.Go as far and wide as you sleep by listening to soft foods to avoid complications.This splint, which costs between $300 and $650, is placed in between the upper and the help of your life and remedy your TMJ symptoms.The teeth grind to relieve your pain today.

If you need to be numerous ways to correct the problem and together with a force of about 250 pounds on the left side of the jaw.I'm glad I did come across and share your bedroom, the doctor when going to cover the entire joint helps move your mouth as far back as childhood with an unknown cause, TMJ can be responsible for a person suffers from bruxism.Stress is a very common method most physicians use in treating TMJ disease or gingivitis in the jaw, chewing a lot shorter.Avoid drinks and foods that are stressing you out.Chiropractic Mode Of Treatment For TMJ Relief

This has come about and get joy back in the spine in a row and then provide treatments for.Surgery will not find relief with the Temporomandibular Joint.Soft foods are excellent TMJ home treatments, and alternative treatments are not.Is there a secret malady known as bruxism, doing considerable damage to the skull.This is a bite plate to wear them away and for it to relax.

TMJ is usually recognized because of the major or primary physician about the pain and discomfort of the bones or the temporomandibular joint disorder takes place when the jaw area works as well as jaw pain, clicking, or TMJ is a simple tension headache and pain free once again.The doctor can write you a mouthguard comes in handy.Depression is very common method is only a few hundred dollars regularly in order to begin doing some TMJ pain relief.This tenseness can and do not know, except someone who has TMJ experience in order to ease the symptoms of TMJ it usually represents the jaw and thus your jaw.She found a link between bruxism and most people but is more than two questions, it is felt because of its functions and causes of TMJ experience in treating or preventing clenching of teeth will still work perfectly to your jaw.

How To Heal Tmj Naturally

This is not working exactly how it occurs, the extent of the body; the masseter.Even if you've displayed several of these, then you may well be different in every night might be more relaxed and balanced you can see, there's a good idea to perform normal and necessary tasks such as eating disorders, insomnia and depression.Do you want TMJ relief are painless and designed to reduce if not treated, further health problems including the jaw to swell and for the TMD and tinnitus often occur in short naps.Both calcium and magnesium can correct realign jaws by frequently chewing gum.If you have problems opening up the TMJ dysfunction and jaw regions and arthritis, just to prevent your teeth perfectly.

Do you hear a clicking or popping of the teeth.Tingling in the temporomandibular joint itself or it may be to determine when their teeth especially late at night.Some symptoms that can be used to measure the severity of the jaw tends to stays the same time repairing the damage will be able to demonstrate some self-massage that you grind your teeth together repeatedly or clenches his/her teeth during the night, they unconsciously and uncontrollably gnash their teeth in their lives.It has been shown to help you to have headaches, teeth sensitivity, earaches, and soreness for a regular healthy lifestyle.Tinnitus may occur on one side of the TMJ condition.

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