#and i'm glad there's so many posts on here talking about how his character is still an asshat
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having a crush on you
summary: how they would act having a crush on you
type of post: headcanons
characters: pomefiore (vil, rook, epel)
additional info: reader is yuu, reader is gender neutral, rook is rook, not proofread, hi I'm insane and I love pining, I NEED to write another fic but with rook. might write this same prompt with other dorms
𝐕𝐢𝐥 𝐒𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐞𝐧𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐭
don't take his calm and collected facade as apathy
he's slowly losing his mind about this
"pacing back and forth, mumbling to himself, falling asleep thinking about you" kind of losing his mind
it's my personal belief that Vil hasn't been in love before this
hasn't even really thought about it
so when you enter the picture it kinda throws him off balance
and with the exception of Rook, no one can even tell
he is an actor, after all, he can play the part of "totally platonic friends with room for Jesus"
(maybe a little too well)
but Vil isn't entirely emotionally repressed
he keeps things to himself, yes, but he's quite conscious of his own wants and needs
so when he realizes he's been craving your presence more than usual he does acknowledge it
in his head
and then does nothing about it for months
...what? he's busy
things like this can wait for him, and he doesn't want to put a rift between you two in case it might be a passing feeling
well... it doesn't pass
he becomes keenly aware of how much he wants you around him, how much he thinks about you, how much your very presence is enough to make him happier than he's ever... really felt
and you know what?
he is totally cool about it.
just kidding. he drives himself insane trying to think of the perfect way to confess, something that will impress you and meet his standards
he's dropping hints left and right and you don't seem to be picking any of them up
which again, just makes him crazy
(some days he really wants to ask you how oblivious one person can be, but he restrains himself)
I mean, how many times can he send you red tulips before you finally get the hint? he's practically spelling it out for you!
there is... a tiny, little part of him that worries you don't reciprocate
is he not your type? are you interested in someone else? perhaps he'd been too harsh on you, after all...
the fact that one little potato can make him so worried absolutely drives him mad
he is the vision of poise and grace and you are ruining him
and this sort of mood comes and goes in waves
just when he thinks he's pulled himself back together, you'll smile at him or say something cute and suddenly he's back to square one
(you're so adorable it's annoying -_-)
while he's sorting out a good way to express his feelings properly, he'll be spending all his free time with you
you need some new things? he'll be glad to take you shopping
you came over to see Epel? oh, well, he's not here, but you should stay for some tea, anyway!
your afternoon is free? he has some new lip gloss he's been dying to test out...
𝐑𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐇𝐮𝐧𝐭
contrary to popular belief, I don't think Rook would be so open about it
he still compliments you, of course, and sings praises of your beauty and elegance, and has little regard for personal space, as always
but he's like that with a lot of people, so it's hard to really tell when he likes someone
the truth of the matter is that Rook Hunt can be just as reserved with his feelings as anyone else
when he really, really likes someone, he keeps it to himself
why?
he's hunting you he's learning more about you before making his true feelings known
he feels it's necessary to have an adequate amount of information on his target before making a move, after all
for reference: you catch his eye at orientation, and do not have a single conversation with him until after winter break
(of course, after that, you start mysteriously running into him everywhere)
is he kinda weird about it? uh. yeah.
this is Rook we're talking about
on the other hand, he's completely lovesick about you and it's almost cute
he's definitely the type to write your initials in a journal with a glitter pen while kicking his feet back and forth and giggling
seeing if you would sound better with his last name or he with yours...
definitely has a very weird photo collection of you somewhere in his room
along with stacks of poems, pressed flowers, and little gifts he intends to give you once he's won you over
(when, not if. Rook is nothing if not patient)
you may find a rose left outside Ramshackle every so often
or a few cans of tuna for Grim
all while acting like the same old eccentric Rook, no discernable difference
except when you can feel his eyes on you at random places in the middle of the day
Ace and Deuce call you paranoid but you can't shake the feeling
though, every once in a while he'll get a little grumpy
Rook is easily jealous, and while that sort of possessiveness never extended to untouchable idols like Vil and Neige, he's already decided that you're his prey
and he'd kindly ask everyone else to find their own, thank you
he hasn't exactly planned the confession yet, but just know it's probably going to be the sweetest and craziest you've ever heard
𝐄𝐩𝐞𝐥 𝐅𝐞𝐥𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐫
first of all he's going to fight you for making him like you so much
second of all he's going to beg for a chance
maybe not in that exact order
Epel is constantly at war with his own emotions and having romance thrown in the mix is. uh. not optimal
not only does it ruin the stoic, strong male persona he's been trying to build, but it's also making him feel all soft and gushy
suddenly he cares about looking nice
(much to Vil's approval)
and now he wants to do nice things for you?
he's gonna bite you
how dare you make him think about kissing and holding hands!
don't you know he's supposed to be above all this romantic stuff? what is he, Rook?!
then, after his initial temper tantrum, he starts coping. hard.
he might be able to stomach the idea of being an item if he gets to wear the pants in the relationship
...yeah, right? right.
if you let him be the man, if you let him protect you...
he might be okay with it!
obviously he starts trying to show off his manly strength (seriously) every time he sees you
starts making comments about how tough practice was on him
will literally never let anyone else carry anything for you ever again
he even provides for you (in payments of apple juice)
obviously this backfires 'cause the second you do something that gives him butterflies he's back to giggling
(you'll have to ease him into the idea of being soft and romantic together, but he'll get there)
but, to his credit, he'd be the first out of all the above to confess
super suddenly and out of nowhere (and he ends up shouting it cause he didn't want to sound chicken) but it's sweet in its own way
#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#vil schoenheit x reader#rook hunt x reader#epel felmier x reader#queued
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me @ Disney: make Smelly Gabe a sculpture or Mickey fucking gets it
#funny because Mickey and Minnie will soon be public domain#i really hate the way gabe just. sounds impressed when percy says he got expelled for assaulting a classmate#i've rewatched too many times and every single time#i notice something that makes gabe seem more and more shitty#i wonder if disney will actually go through with his abusive step father arc#because disney is too weak to actually show impactful storylines#i'll be mad if they don't because it's so important#also you might've seen a post similar to this before and that's because i deleted that one#wasn't happy with it#i was among the people who were surprised at the changes in gabe's character#i just thought he was pathetic and wasn't sure if the statue-ification in the finale would work then because he was different from the book#but you can see how unhappy percy is to be returning home because he knows he'll have to see gabe too#and i'm glad there's so many posts on here talking about how his character is still an asshat#because him not reacting much to percy sassing him out blindsided me#honestly grateful to those posts because they really do put things in a new light#ok i'll stop being annoying in the tags now#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo tv show#pjo tv spoilers#isoceratops
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Hey, whoever requested the last one did great but now it's my turn, I can ask for the same thing in a Luke Jealous mission but in my case it would be Dark Luke.
Luke Castellan. If I kill someone for you
Dark!Luke Castellan X Aphrodite!Daughter!Reader
Summary: talking with you is one thing, but flirting? The audacity of a man.
Reader and Luke are not in a relationship.
Warning: 16+, obsessive behavior, Luke is a pervert, canon universe, non-canon quest, Reader doesn't have a lot of dialogues, original character(s), not beta read, one shot, no smut obv, issues, jealousy, I wrote this instead of sleeping, GDoV, murdering, Luke is a killer, a murderer and a man known for his beauty 🤭🤭, Luke can't stop yapping 🤷, implied manipulation, ooc, cnc
3 posts in a day? Shockers, I'm a champ now mom 💯
A/n: since some of the requests are "Jealous Luke" and "Dark Luke" I decided to merge it into one! Also feel free to request other characters. Fyi, you can request Bianca/Leo/Nico/Will/Etc & gender! It can be M/F/Non-bi , you can choose which gods you want to be the godly parent too 🎀 I don't have a life and I'm free 24/7
One thing that Luke Castellan knows about you is that you are most likely Aphrodite's favourite daughter, - you shine so brightly that others are drawn to you, you're gorgeous and everyone knows that.
He, himself, can't help but worries his own obsession with you has turned worse since the past few years since he first saw you.
He starts stealing your belongings, particularly your undergarments. It was supposed to be a normal thing, like stealing your pen and your used shirt, but when he saw the laundry basket next to your bed, he couldn't help but reach for your pretty pink frilly panties.
He was glad he always wore cargo trousers. It's easy to hide your undergarments that way - a smirk appeared on his face at the thought of it.
Fortunately, no one was present when he left the Aphrodite Cabin. That is, until he heard Chris call his name. "Hey man - Mr.Chiron called us for another teammate's quest selection".
"Oh? Let's go," he says with a forced smile.
Well that was a few days ago and now he's stuck with a dude from Apollo Cabin and most importantly he's stuck with you.
He extended his hand. "(Name), isn't it?" he asked. "Camp Half Blood golden boy isn't it?" You tease.
Luke's gaze darted around the forest clearing, and he blushed; he hadn't realised your hand was shaking his extended hand.
Ethan Calixto. He's such a sight for sore eyes. Flirting with you in front of Luke. 'The audacity of a man', he thought to himself.
He pursed his lips, a slight furrow between his brows as he stared pointedly at Ethan, and with an icy coldness.
"We're here to go on a quest, not flirt," he scoffed.
If Luke had wanted to, he would have killed Ethan. Oh my gods, he has so many ideas, but his favourite is definitely killing the poor dude!
To show how satisfying it was to watch Ethan slowly slide against the wall with his back, leaving straight, thick red lines behind. His trembling mouth was trying to say something. He vomited a lot of blood, and the light reflections on his irises faded away.
But that was just one of his million ideas and he isn't trying to spend his time on a dude who's not worthy of your present.
Being Aphrodite's daughter does not imply that you are only an expert in Amokinesis, beauty, and French. You might just be Athena's daughter, based on the way you make plans.
Ethan, in an attempt to impress you, denies your plans and instead devises a terrible plan that he believes is a good idea. Luke dismisses, "Just because you can doesn't mean you should".
Now that irritates Luke. Ethan's ideas were terrible, but since this is his quest, you simply accept them, and Luke follows your lead, not without considering murdering Ethan in a different way.
★
Luke's eyes flickered with irritation, but he maintained composure. "Charisma is just one aspect of a successful quest. Cooperation is equally crucial."
As preparations began, tension lingered in the air. During another strategy meeting, Ethan emphasized his ideas, seemingly ignoring Luke's input. The latter bit his tongue, suppressing his desire to straight up murdering Ethan.
In the forest, while navigating a maze of twists and turns, Ethan made a questionable decision. Luke couldn't hold back any longer. "Ethan, are you sure about this path? It seems risky," he suggested, his patience wearing thin.
Ethan waved him off. "Relax, Castellan. I've got it under control. Your input isn't necessary."
The words stung, but Luke remained composed. You observed the escalating tension between the two. Luke, determined to prioritize the mission, restrained himself from confronting Ethan directly.
Ethan, with a sly grin, addressed Luke. "Castellan, do you have any issues with how I'm leading this quest?"
Luke sighed, choosing his words carefully. "I just think we should work together more closely. It's about teamwork, not individual glory."
Ethan chuckled condescendingly. "Teamwork, huh? Maybe if you were more decisive, we wouldn't need this discussion."
That causes Luke to snap. While you were sleeping like a sleeping beauty, Luke took advantage of the opportunity to photograph you with the stolen phone he was holding.
"For the latter," he thought to himself, chuckling.
Given that Ethan is also sleeping at the moment, Luke decides to murder him. Why? Because he was a nuisance standing in the way. One thing was certain: Luke was glad he asked Demeter's son for a poison plant a few weeks ago. He used the excuse of wanting to study about it.
Hemlock a relatively common plant that has been used to execute criminals throughout history, most notably the Greek philosopher Sokrates in 399 BC. By pulverizing the fruit after shelling it, then spread a thin layer of the powder over a cup of water. It takes approximately 0.5 grammes to kill an adult.
How would he die? It paralyses the spinal cord starting at the feet, and he dies within 30 minutes to 5 hours. What's the cause? Respiratory paralysis occurs while fully conscious.
And that was something Luke Castellan enjoyed about murdering. This is his third victim, and he's only 19 years old, but who are the gods to judge his actions?
"are you awake yet?" He said with bitterness. Ethan's groggy eyes snapped to Luke as he realised he was tied to a tree.
"What the fuck are you doing?!" Ethan yelled out. "Hmm? I wonder what I'm doing." Luke ponders.
Luke smiled as Ethan struggled to free himself from the tree. "You shouldn't do that y'know, you're letting out too much noise to my liking"
Luke continues, "I thought Apollo's children were known for their foresight? Can't you see your future? I thought you were smart.."
"Shut the hell up Castellan, my dad's going to murder you!" Ethan's voice was strained as he yelled at Luke.
The realisation dawned on him, "fuck" Ethan cursed, and he lost feeling in his legs.
"What did you do to me, monster?" he spit out. "Oh I don't know just some Hemlock" Luke says with a grin, "I can't wait to see you die in a few hours!" He said that with a crazy look on his face.
"FUCK YOURSELF CASTELLAN"
Luke quickly returned to you and noticed you rubbing your eyes. "Good morning sleeping beauty, did you get a good night's sleep?" Luke teases.
You groaned, "What time is it?".
"It's only 2am way too early for you y'know go back to sleep."
You look around your surroundings and notice that Ethan is not with you. "Where's Ethan?" You speak up.
"nothing you should worry about, I think he's just taking a dump somewhere" said Luke with a laugh.
You chuckle nervously, noticing Luke's facial cuts and bruises. You decide not to be a busy body, you simply return to sleep, which Luke appreciates.
"good girl" he grinned.
Waiting for a few hours was boring, so Luke decided to visit Ethan again because why not? It's enjoyable just to see the man cry out in pain.
Luke quickly made his way deeper into the forest, noting that there were no signs of yelling or grunting. "oh? dead already that was fast."
Of course, he didn't want the cops and detectives prying into his life, so he sloppily buried Ethan near the trees, removing all traces of human presence.
He wasn't Demeter's child, so he doesn't know how to properly bury someone, and he couldn't care less about Ethan fucking Calixto.
Now he can have you all to himself, with no one to disrupt your interaction. It was finally 7 a.m., and the sun was casting a warm glow as you rose, just like a sun god would.
"Luke?" You groaned. "Hmm?" He sat there with food in front of him: toast with a sunny side egg. "Is that food or am I in heaven?" You make jokes.
"I cook this for you being the eldest makes me a great cook," he says, flashing his perfect pearly white teeth to you.
You immediately felt at ease and decided to sit next to him and eat your food quietly.
"I wonder where Ethan is?" You ponder.
"Are you not charmed by my present that you need another man?" He snapped. Oh, oh his bad side is beginning to emerge.
"w-what no! I'm worried because he chose us for this quest to keep him safe and fight alongside him." You explained.
1 minutes.
Another 4 minutes have passed.
Making it 5 minutes already and Luke Castellan is not helping.
It is beginning to bother you that he did not look for Ethan. What if he died due to your incompetence? What if he was killed by a bear while sleeping? But. When was Luke ever asleep? He couldn't possibly have murdered Ethan, could he?
"don't worry your pretty head" he finally breaks the silence.
"what did you do to him?" You muttered. "Ethan? Oh not so much" he said softly trying not to scare you.
Your tears were threatening to fall any second now. "D-did you k-kill him?" You gulp. "Maybe," he smiles, placing his hand on your cheeks.
His hands make you all soft and putty. "I know you're scared, my sweet girl." He presses a kiss on top of your head. "I will take care of you. You do not need to do anything. Okay?"
He's such a sweet talker that you're worried you'll excuse the fact that he murdered someone. You don't even mind the fact that his hands are engulfing your thighs, palms running up and down the exposed skin in mindless motions.
His brown eyes are staring at you. "Can I kiss you?" He asked. You may have been scared, but that did not stop you from mindlessly nodding.
After all, you were a little messed up in the head, just like him.
#luke pjo#luke castellan x reader#luke castellan#charlie bushnell#oc#pjo tv show#pjo series#non canon#pjo#pjo fandom#pjo fanfic#chris rodriguez
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an: this is a reupload!! (copy and paste pain) because for some reason my original post wasn’t showing up on the tags?? even my own??? if this doesn’t show up again i’m just gonna leave it as is. also the og’s who saw the post before i took it down are the real ones <3 anyways, requests are closed but i took this as a suggestion because i wanted to do it. when i saw this in my inbox i felt productive/determined to fulfill this ask so you're welcome /Ih and holy shit 2k+ notes on part one you guys are crazy thank you so much i'm so glad you liked it!! you take care of yourself as well dear anon <3
‘i've got my eye on you.’ (pt. 2)
prompt: what would they do if they saw their s/o in an uncomfortable situation
characters: itto, diluc, zhongli, ayato, tartaglia, thoma, kaeya
style: fluff, much fluff
notes: not proofread, lowercase intended, possibly ooc because i used character demos/teasers/ a few voicelines as references, gender neutral reader, the smaller text is whispering, no dialogue/use for [name], kuki shinobu mention in itto's part, how tf do you write zhongli and kaeya, petnames: beloved, treasure, love, swearing, blood mention in tartaglia's part, tartaglia getting a little violent, got lazy while writing the last few portions
reblogs are appreciated!
itto
"HEYYYY THERE YOU ARE!! so uh, are these guys bothering you?"
"huh, so they are. hey! hey, no worries! ill getcha outta here. i'm THE arataki numero uno they’re dealing with."
"hey, so, you're making my lovely super amazing wonderful partner uncomfortable and i would absolutely LOVE it if you leave em alone."
"oh wait, they're already gone. OHHHH did i scare them?? HAHAHAAA, man, that was great. totally worth the scare. anyways! want to have an onikabuto battle? yeah? OKAY! come on, come on, come on!!! i know the best spot to find them. but just so you know, i will beat you this time!"
let me tell you itto's was a lot of fun to write. i don't have to write too seriously!!!
he was looking for you actually, to have a little onikabuto battle since he's determined to win. (despite the many losses he has under his belt)
but seeing you look so uneasy from afar, yeah no he's not having it. ran towards you at mach 20.
one simple glance at him, those creeps are running to their mothers. the best part was that itto was confused as to why they've run off but he assumed it was because of him.
well, he's half right, because what really scared them off was kuki shinobu's shadow quite literally appeared out of nowhere next to you and itto. mvp! you guys weren't aware of her presence, because after they ran off, she just walked away. stealthy. like a boss.
i find it canon that if itto has a s/o shinobu would do anything in her power to keep those two away from trouble/danger. it's her job as deputy leader of the arataki gang, right?
diluc
"look, i'm not interested in small talk, but i'll get straight to the point. if you wish to make things simple for the both of us, see yourselves out. i won't ask again."
"what am i going to do about it? well, wouldn't you like to know." (casually readies his claymore)
"what a bunch of imbeciles. *sigh* i apologize for not arriving here sooner, i'll escort you home."
"you. want to stay with me? alright, i'll arrange a room for you at the winery right away. no? ah. i see. then i suppose my bed would big enough for the two of us to sleep on. are you satisfied with that? good. now let's go."
he isn't the darknight hero for nothing
like the gentleman he is, he was going to accompany you until you get home safely and then exchange goodbyes.
but no, you wanted to stay with him for the night. he has many rooms for the guests to use, but when you in particular suggested to sleep with him in his room, he of course doesn't mind since it's you.
should it be anyone else, it'll be an immediate no. so be glad you get to have this privilege from the guy because he loves you and is willing to do anything for you
zhongli
"pardon the intrusion, but i believe now's the time for the both of us to take our leave. please excuse us."
"it'd be wise for you to not place your indelicate hands onto my beloved. lest you'll see a rather.. grotesque, outcome."
"my dear, are you alright? ... how did i find you, you may ask? oh, please do not underestimate me. i'm far more than what meets the eye."
"we are sharing a contract, after all. to live and cherish life with one another until the end of time, to be safe, filled with tenderness and warmth within our hearts, and to not have anyone interfere that great deal of a bond. for you are my greatest treasure."
rip my brain for having to push zhongli's portion out because it clearly cannot comprehend this man's vocabulary.
you and him are to follow a contract, yes. but it's similar to a confession, if that makes sense?
basically zhongli was the one to confess to you first with his built-in thesaurus (to which you accepted of course if you like him too) and then have you and him sign' this sort of contract as a promise to stick with one another for as long as life can allow it. and by sign...
it's a kiss. to seal the contract :)
ayato
"a pity. hm? yes, i am 'the head of the kamisato clan. but your concerns about my reputation is irrelevant."
"you're harassing my lover, and if i catch you doing this unsightly act once again, then i'm afraid i'll have to resort to something that'll make you wish you've never been born."
"ah, my words were too harsh? nonsense, it was vitally necessary. at least it'd driven them away. well, i guess there are benefits for someone of high status."
"come now, i'll have my staff cook you something to your liking. you are my lover, so they'll be sure to suit your needs. you needn't worry."
fun fact: i've never finished ayato's story quest so i was writing this blind (with the help of some voicelines/demos/teasers, this goes along with the rest of the men on this list)
originally, you two were going on a nightly stroll since he was free but were stopped by a group of creeps. however, ayato handled the matter in his way.
in his head, those creeps are a waste of time and mere bugs because, well, they are. and pathetic, because they immediately recognize him for his high status and they all shrank in his presence. which made things easier for ayato. he made a small threat, and then they zoomed.
afterwards, he wanted to bring you home for dinner instead. continuing to stay out after that ordeal was not an option in his book.
what a good man
tartaglia
"wow, you all are quite bold. daring to do that while i'm here? hah, how risky. i'm actually impressed, by how wrong of a move you've just played."
"say, wouldn't you guys be interested for a sparring session? i'll be delighted to fight you all at the same time to enhance my combative capabilities. no? are you sure? okay, the offer's still on the table you know. and don't think i'm letting you all off so easily."
"love, are you alright? did they hurt you? if they did then i'll be sure to give them the same pain as they did to you. but worse. hm? no? okay, if you insist."
"moving on, let's go home shall we? the more i think about those creeps, the more i'm itching to grab my blades and hunt them down. oh! no, it's nothing. let's move, wouldn't want to stay out for too long."
we all know that he'll definitely end them
the thing is, he was right next to you when it happened and it's almost as if those asshats were blind!!!
blinded by his beauty ig
well, those assholes should sleep with one eye open every night now that tartaglia has seen them.
thoma
"excuse me, my partner and i are in a hurry. we have important business to attend to and we wouldn't want to be late."
"we won't take up the rest of your time, so please, if you'll excuse us."
"phew, that was rough. i didn't like how they were treating you, so i wanted to help you out. oh nonono, there's no need to thank me! as your boyfriend, it's my job to make sure that you're safe and happy at all times!"
"to get your mind off of what happened, i'll cook dinner for you tonight. any preferences? favorites? recipes? ill be sure to write them down!"
thoma based
instead of staying and insulting them, he just makes up an excuse to leave! it saves less time!!
..which shunned the creeps to bits. because you see, to me, people who are as kindhearted as thoma are equivalent to sunshine. and by sunshine i mean blindingly bright.
too nice and polite to the point the creeps are blind and deaf, you get what i mean?
kaeya
"well, well, well, how amusing of you all to act in such a way while i'm here. clearly you weren't cautious about your surroundings nor able to understand the differences between common courtesy and disrespect."
"how do i think so? from what you were displaying a few seconds ago, there's an obvious answer to that. it's allill written in your face. uneasiness. just like my partner."
"run along now, before your feet will run cold."
"ah, please, spare me the thanks. i only did what i had to do. as long as you're safe, that's all that matters to me. now then, allow me to treat you to dinner. it's all on me~"
honestly i got very lost in writing kaya's portion despite listening to his voicelines for like 2-3 times :,)
but, what i can conclude from this is that he'll be the sly bro he usually is with people
except in here, it's a bit different. his words are like that of a snake, wrapping around its prey.
makes sense, because kaeya doesn't stand people who make his s/o uncomfortable. if he scares them off or anything, then so be it. anything to keep you safe.
#✏️ lume writes#genshin#genshin impact#genshin x gn reader#genshin x reader#genshin fluff#itto x reader#diluc x reader#zhongli x reader#ayato x reader#tartaglia x reader#childe x reader#thoma x reader#kaeya x reader#itto fluff#diluc fluff#zhongli fluff#tartaglia fluff#thoma fluff#kaeya fluff
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actually i dont think ive posted my thoughts on ofmd s2 overall here yet have i?
ok here goes: i think it had incredibly high highs, and at some parts i genuinely enjoyed it more than i did the first season, episode 6 being peak imo. however, it had equally abysmal lows with some glaring writing-, tone- and pacing issues that all came to a head in the finale.
i once read someone say that, if you ever feel like a finale ruined the whole story, maybe you should take another look at the story. there were most likely cracks and problems all along, and the finale did nothing besides dashing the hope that these would perhaps be addressed later. very rarely do genuinely well written stories go completely off the rails in the finale and ruin the whole thing.
i think this is applicable here in some ways, SPECIFICALLY in regards to edward. good god edward was a MESS this season, and it's so sad because i loved the starting point! the kraken era was absolutely terrifying and iconic as FUCK but... they shouldn't have leaned so hard into the drama and trauma of it all. don't get me wrong, i loved that it did. it's one of my favorite parts of the season and i'm so glad we got it. but if they wanted this arc to work with the overarching plot as they wrote it, they would've had to lighten up the tone here CONSIDERABLY. had they played the kraken era for comedy then sure! edward's bad youtuber apology would've been funny. his fast redemption would've been less jarring. the lack of consequences less disturbing. but as it stands in the show, this arc is too dark to function with the later episodes.
i feel like they wanted to have their cake and eat it too here. they wanted the gritty drama of ed coming off the hinges entirely but also didn't want to deal with the aftermath of such a heavy arc in their silly pirate romcom. be that due to time constraints and budget cuts or because they were simply unwilling to, doesn't really matter in the end. the result is the same either way: a very tonally messy season with some accidentally troubling implications regarding abuse.
and mentioning troubling implications regarding abuse; izzy. my poor, poor izzy... his arc was absolutely glorious. i liked izzy the second he showed up in s1 and i was absolutely EATING this season up in that regard. and i think in this case, they genuinely did fuck it all up in the finale with that one stupid choice:
choosing to kill izzy was the DUMBEST thing they couldve done here.
ive talked about this over and over and over again. ive reblogged so many meta posts. and still i am left absolutely flabbergasted by how stupid of a decision this was. the fridging, playing at the fallen woman trope, killing the beating heart of the season and the character who delivers what is essentially a thesis statement, killing off the character whose arc is about coming to terms with his disability, having him die in edward's arms, comforting him and apologizing after an entire season of finding community and love outside of edward, the absolutely godawful pacing of it all, the extremely easy and obvious solution of just having IZZY become the new captain of the revenge to mirror s1 and hammer home how much he has developed since then in one go... i could go on. and i have. it was a stupid writing decision, completely fucked the tone and pacing of the finale and took away attention and time from things that really would've deserved a better wrap up (lucius and black pete deserved better)
now. the whole prince ricky & zheng plot line... yeah that shit sucked ass, sorry. they bit off more than they could chew here. i honestly think those are the arc words of this season:
✨️ bit off more than they could chew ✨️
right off the bat: i think he was good as a concept. bringing in a foil for stede who just doesn't Get It as stede does could've made for very good comedy and drama (and to be fair there is some of that). but that shit got away from them extremely quickly. nothing about how he's implemented past his first episode works, and i think this is very specifically because he's mostly played as the comic relief in his debut episode. making this completely bumbling fool, who gets his nose hacked off on his first job, the main villain of your entire season is... definitely a choice. idk. he didn't work for me at all.
ok wow mentioning shit getting away from the writers. this definitely got away from me. this was supposed to be a short lil post. well. i guess tl;dr i loved this season but jesus christ there was a lot wrong with it. if you want to hear more thoughts. ask box is open. be my guest. i have more to say so even if you dont ask i might add more to this at some point but im tired and have work tmrw.
#i was going to do shit today and now look at me.#0:18 at night#laying in bed#writing this shit#i havent even eaten.#christtttt#moogsin'#ofmd#izzy hands#our flag means death#ofmd meta#ofmd critical#ofmd s2#ofmd spoilers#the izcourse#im not tagging any of the other characters cuz i shittalk all of them 😭#listen i love edward hes my babygirl but this season did him DIRTY.
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Kissing you on the mouth for your Lance son of Hermes take. I didn't even really have an opinion before but after reading your post I'm immediately sold and so invested in the au
Do you have ideas on what the other characters godly parents would be? Hunk with Hephaestus makes sense to me, and I'm a fan of Keith son of Ares (learning to accept his godly dad could match with his arc about accepting he's part galra, a supposedly evil/violent side of him, + the anger and fighting skills), but not sure about the others...
hello!!! I'm glad you see the vision hehe.
I actually sent many a paragraph to heynhay about this only yesterday. I was firmly on the son of Ares Keith headcanon but then... someone reblogged my post saying Keith son of Zeus (I think it was @pidges-lost-robot and i was like WAAAAIT.
Okay so here's my many many paragraphs explaining headcanons for each.
Shiro son of Zeus: Okay so in my head Shiro & Keith are both sons of Zeus but for very different reasons. They're like Thalia vs Jason types. Shiro is a great leader, he's ambitious, he's brave, he's a legend. His dad is so proud. He's been on like 20 quests and absolutely demolished all of them. All the kids in camp know he's So Cool and Talented. He can be hot headed sometimes but ultimately he's really adept at setting aside his feelings for the Greater Good etc. Ideal hero type and ideal son to the big guy upstairs.
Keith son of Zeus: Keith is all the bad traits of Zeus (sorry to him). He's got a short temper, he's impulsive, he's closed off. He's a prodigy without meaning to be. Everyone pays attention to him but (despite what Lance thinks) it's because they think he's a freak, he's not a big three kid the way you're Supposed To Be. And he doesn't want to be a leader. This really rubs Zeus the wrong way. Keith would rather disappear into the ranks of his fellow campers than be the star of the show and that goes against everything children of Zeus are supposed to be. His dad definitely refuses to claim him for a long time which makes Keith just some weird really powerful kid who doesn't know who his godly parent is. Luckily Shiro takes him under his wing : )) (too bad Shiro doesn't come back from his latest quest tho, no one knows where he went off to and Chiron doesn't want to send out a quest because if something kept Shiro The Legend from coming back to camp it must be really bad).
Hunk son of Aphrodite: ANOTHER ONE I'M FIRM ABOUT. I think Hunk's defining characteristic is his love for his friends. Hunk is always looking for peaceful ways to solve problems, he's always forming relationships with people before doing anything else, he really values giving love to those around him. It also doesn't hurt that he's kind of squeamish and particular about a lot of things, as a lot of Aphrodite's children are. But I really think his greatest strengths are the ways he's able to relate to others. I know a lot of people say Lance is the glue that holds everyone together, but I think it's Hunk. I know the fanon is that Aphrodite's kids are all just big flirts but I think both Selena and Piper are great examples that that's not true, and Hunk would absolutely be their brother.
Pidge daughter of Hephaestus: I've seen some people saying Athena for Pidge but that's another one where I just can't get behind it. Pidge is so smart in so many ways but so stupid in others. She's too impulsive and single minded to be a daughter of Athena, imo. Her main love is figuring out how things work, what makes them tick, and using that knowledge to help those she loves. Children of Hephaestus are know to hold grudges, fight for their families, and let's not forget Hephaestus spending literally all of his free time trying to play pranks on the other Gods with his little contraptions like that is all Pidge would do all day long. Plus she befriends a robot and that is who she talks to for the first like 3 episodes of Voltron that is so unbelievably child of Hephaestus energy.
Anyway thank u for asking this question I've been thinking on it for days. I am also open to the idea of Shiro being a son of Athena, I think that would suit him well. And also in my head I like to think Keith would potentially just remain unclaimed until he stomped his way to Mount Olympus and forced whoever was his parent to fess up.
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23 asks! Thank you!! :}} 🎀
what
Originally I added the bandages to mirror my real hands being covered in Band-Aids when I made my sona. :0 (It was due to cat scratches and dry skin don't worry-)
Now they represent my "artist hands".... and my still really dry skin XDD
Oh yeah absolutely. His crab arm is so heavy that if he falls into the water he'll sink 😬 he cant move it fast enough to help him swim to the surface.. good thing Blue Beauty is always nearby! <XD
It also takes a lot of energy to move and he deals with sore back/shoulder muscles a lot. The way the crab arm formed, its like all the muscles in his back are used to lift and operate it. When he walks around he kind'a uses it as a crutch or a third leg. His legs each take a step and then his crab arm lifts forward and clunks on the ground.
"tap tap.. CLUNK. tap tap.. CLUNK."
Despite all this though, Louis still really likes his new arm and isn't bothered much by all the hardships it brings :)
@neo-metalscottic
Thank you so much!!! :DD I'm hoping I get over this soon 🥺
As for Grim's eyes, I mention that coloring mistake in the tags of this post. It was simply a matter of me misremembering what Gengar looks like :// But I'm thinking I'll keep his white eyes anyways. He looks a lot more friendly that way :}}
THEY HAVE SPARKS?? THEY'RE INDIVIDUALS?? I thought they were just mindless clones! Man.. That makes things in the show even darker-- <XDD
And ohhh, yeah I can see it. I wonder why they decided to add him of all characters? He does have cool shades tho XDD
@holly-opal
Yeah, that's the idea. <:/ I have yet to plan out how she died tho-
@glitchhayden418
There she is!! :DD She looks great!! :}}
And thank you, I'm hoping I get well soon too 🙂💔
She never has to stop! I've decided that my characters can eat as much as they want, whenever they want, however they want, and suffer absolutely no consequences what so ever.
Cici just seems to be taking advantage of this ability more than the others <XDD
@artblock200322022
:DD Thank you!! I'm so glad you like my interpretation of the Octonauts! :}}
@possibly-astraeus
Oof. Always disappointing to hear people finding me through stolen artwork..
But yeah, you're at the source now! :} Just remember, if you find my artwork anywhere else other than here? Its stolen ://
@shallow-isles
I simply misremembered what Gengar looks like and colored his eyes wrong :/// (I talk about it in the tags of this post) But I think I'll keep them white. He just looks so friendly and soft with white eyes.. 🥺
As for Sylveon, I like to think that tying his ribbons around others like that is his way of giving them a hug :}} Since Grim is so r o u n d, there's not many places the ribbons can comfortably tie and not be in Grim's way. His ears are the perfect spot! :}
@tallchest13-blog
THANK YOU! :D WOULD YOU BE UPSET IF I GAVE THIS TEA TO CICI THO? SHE REALLY WANTS TO TRY IT :((
@aishutoon
Ohh! They look so round and cozy!! :333
@yourstrulylightstar283 (Referencing this post)
Thank you! :}}}
@circadiananomaly (24k post in question)
Thank you! I'm hoping this is all over soon as well. :'(((
@candyglumboy
Like, my Pokémon Violet team? :0 There will not be any new members no.. you can only have 6 Pokémon in your party at a time!
...Then again there's Patty.. the Hoppip that Anastasia replaced.. I miss her.. 🥺💔💔💔
I hope I feel good too.. 😔😔😔
@graminos
:DD Thank you! I'm glad you like them!! :}}}}
(Post in question)
Me reading this ask ksjnakjn 🥺🥺💞💞💞 that was all basically on point!! :DDD
@youlikwjazz004
I'm afraid I have absolutely no idea how to explain that :'(( 💔💔
The very best I can explain my art process is; "I just.. draw it. And if it doesn't feel right, I just draw it differently until it does feel right." Its all down to muscle memory and drawing what "feels" right. I don't think I'm able to explain that-- 😭😭😭 I'm very sorry! <:'(((
@askladyinwhiteandfam
Woah! What a critter! :00 ✨✨It looks great! :DD
@square-the-cyan-idiot542
WAAAHGG THANK YIU!!!- Oh crap you ok tho--
@littlelightfish (Post in question)
:DD Thank you! I'm so glad you like him!! :}}}
@beryl-shade
He'd be amazed! :00
#my response#cookie run#cookie run kingdom#cookie run ocs#my ocs#factual fam#super mario bros#pokemon scarlet and violet#gengar#sylveon#fnaf security breach
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Hi, I hope you're doing well? I love your analysis of Halsin and I like him even more now that I understand him better.
Just recently I saw a post about Halsin degrading (?) himself when he propositions to the player and that he's happy with being just with them but he won't keep them from finding happiness with others. From what I gathered, since he's a mature wood elf, being poly is very much okay for him but I need your expertise here. Is Halsin _really_ ok with being "just" another boyfriend or does he think of himself as not worthy enough to be an "only" boyfriend?
I'm doing alright, just trying to power through this final essay for my epidemiology class! I'm glad to hear you feel like my posts make you understand him better <3333
Hm. So... I want to say this delicately because I don't want to demean those who have this interpretation, but I have noticed that this fandom has a real tendency to try to patholologicize sexual behaviors it deems outside the norm. All three of the characters who consent to polyamory with Halsin- Karlach, Shadowheart, and Astarion- have had many people trying to make it sound like they don't actually consent, and in Astarion's case, trying to link this to his trauma despite canonical evidence to the contrary. It reads like an attempt to infantilize, especially Astarion, and make it seem like anyone who consents to polyamory must have something "wrong with them" to do so; that there has to be a "reason" for polyamorous relationships, and that reason has to be that there's something "wrong" with the characters. They can't say no, they are manifesting trauma, they are afraid to be left single, they are using polyamory as a tool to commit mental/emotional self-harm. Needless to say, I really don't like this.
I like it even less with Halsin, because he is a wood elf. Polyamory is the default for his culture. Treating his social practices like they're the result of him being "broken" is really wrong, to me. Why don't we pathologicize Lae'zel, who comes from a culture that practices polyamory by default, being monogamous? "Maybe her monogamy is because she's too insecure in her attachment to embrace polyamory." "Maybe her trauma with being unvalued in her culture has left her too afraid to understand polyamorous relationships." It never happens, because our culture is monogamous, and therefore people want to explain away deviation from our particular set of norms.
Halsin is "traumatized and poly", not "poly because he's traumatized." The devnotes in the scene where Halsin first explains being poly specifically state, several times, that he's being sincere and that this is a core belief of his. Halsin isn't reluctantly accepting crumbs of affection because he thinks it's all he can get; he loves the player, is secure enough to know it doesn't need to compete with anyone else's love to be special, and is happy to see how the relationship unfolds now that he is free of the Shadow Curse.
He's not degrading himself by entering into such an arrangement; if anything, entering a relationship where he refuses his nature would be a degradation. Monogamy would be the degrading "abandoning who he is to beg for mere scraps of affection" option for Halsin.
I know it all comes back to the "you are all I want" option, but I think people are misinterpreting it. There was a silent "right now" at the end. He didn't mean he would never want another; he meant at that moment, the player was the only one he had his eyes on, but obviously that wasn't true for the player.
People say that Halsin never manifesting that interest later is an indication that he isn't real, but he does manifest it; if rejected at Sharess' Caress, he states his intention to basically go get laid elsewhere. He is receptive to the idea of having a threesome with Mizora one day if the player lightheartedly suggests it ("don't let me talk myself out of a night to remember all the time...")
These aren't committed relationships, no, but Halsin has little contact outside of the group to begin with. And as he says, his heart doesn't stir easily. He is very open to sex, but committed relationships aren't as much a part of his normal life; the player is all but said to be extraordinary for awakening those feelings in him. He hasn't had much room for deep romantic love in his life.
The lines- saying he wants others to enjoy the player, while he only wants the player- are simply reflecting the reality that at this point, the player has another lover, while Halsin has no other people he is interested in. That's all it is.
Again, I think Halsin would find settling for a monogamous relationship to be much more degrading than a polyamorous one, personally.
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You mentioned in a previous Astarion analysis post:
"But, I think, given his behavior, his casual flirtiness, his "You want to lose yourself in me," (another line I can squawk about endlessly in terms of character analysis)"
I am encouraging you to squawk. I think you've got a really good grasp of his character and I love your posts!
UPDATE***written during EA
@littlemisstrancy Sorry for the late reply! I fell down another rabbit hole of replaying haha.... Aww, thank you! I'm so glad, a good grade in Astarion is a Normal and Reasonable thing to want to achieve. But YES, I find his entire sex scene to be extremely interesting (going off of what Larian said that, paraphrased, nonsexual intimacy with some will mean more than sex with others, because of the nature of the relationship.)
What I find most interesting about Astarion's romance scenes is that the scene itself is remarkably much more syrupy than he, by nature, really is. We can point to, "darling," "my love," as evidence of his tendencies for the dramatics, yes, but given that these are petnames he'll throw out to a Tav he hates as much as a Tav he enjoys, the surface meaning and connotations of dramatic flirtations and even more dramatic pre-sex speeches.... shifts.
The way we filter these interactions shifts because we have to filter what is, at first glance, a typical romance scene, through the lens of the character giving the spiel. If Astarion associates dramatic seduction and slinky purring as simply the easiest way to get what he wants--or, perhaps, more than that, the expectation, the only way for this interaction to occur, because hollow dramatics/play-acting have been likely the only pseudo-""romance"" he's engaged in in the 200 years he's been with Cazador, that changes the meaning of everything, including the line: "You want to lose yourself in me." <- sure laddie, just keep objectifying and disconnecting yourself from the experience itself and repeat the habits of behavior that you've learned from 200 years of being someone else's toy and tool where you weren't even a willing participant in what was happening, merely a mandatory one. that'll be really great. no backfiring here whatsoever.
Okay, sorry, under the cut the rest of this goes because I went off on three different tangents to try and tie them all back together again. This is mostly my background reasoning for above. WHAT DOES THE REST HAVE TO DO WITH TAV. Honestly I'm not sure anymore I started talking and then I didn't stop talking.
It feels like so much of the overarching realities of their circumstances fall away for Tav, but it also haunts the entire interaction with Astarion. Shallow charm. Winning over people. A pretty face opening doors. I'd chalk it up to sexy-video-game-scene-writing if it were any other game, but the other romance scenes aren't nearly so grandstanding and are written I think intentionally to subvert that, so this is an Astarion Thing, and likely goes deeper than that first glance. As it stands, Astarion barely even knows who he is now that he's outside of Cazador's control. "Another thing that I've lost." -- His personhood has been nonexistent, and he's been a tool, and he's been, for lack of a better word, dehumanized to the fullest extent for an insurmountable amount of time. So of course the thing he learned best is that the easiest way to get what you want, or get what you need, is to be easily projected unto. He can't keep the facade up for very long, I don't think, but in that scene his "don't ask too many questions just look at how hot I am" mindset is fully on to me.
The thing is that his circumstances with Tav here are entirely different than the ones he's been in before, but just because the circumstances are different doesn't mean that the behavior will be different, or that habits formed out of severe distress/torture in his own words will be so easily let go of. My ULTIMATE POINT is that charm and flirtations are things Astarion clearly separates from himself and his actual beliefs, and he treats what we conceive as "charming" behavior fairly flippantly--once again, that "my love," means... not... a lot. we just met 2 weeks ago, pal. And I don't think he's interested in using it like that anymore, because he's not making a super great effort to be perceived as likeable. It comes out mostly in scenes where flirting and charisma are expected of the interaction and then they're pushed to their most exaggerated format, when he isn't actually typically like that in other conversations. Dramatic and foppish, yes, and enjoys ridiculousness in several formats, yes, but not nearly so egregiously saccharine, at all.
If he is starting to give a fuck about Tav, or even the group, that's something else to grapple with, and it's still at this point I think partly wrapped up in the idea that Tav makes for a "good ally." His scenes where he says: "we're more alike than I thought" "You're stronger than I gave you credit for," feel more genuine and honest to me in some ways than his sex scene speech. His fondness for Tav and his idea that strength/power/security can be found by sticking close to Tav can be true at the same time, in an interesting dance between his growing connection to them and his general ideas on people, power, and control.
So secondary: is Astarion a manipulator who's using this sex scene to control Tav emotionally and that's what he's got going on here? Eh... maybe yes and no? He wouldn't ask Tav if he wasn't interested--as seen by how he'll shut you down if he can't stand your guts. If he's using sex for that, it's up in the air, open to interpretation, depends on your HC, I can see both interpretations and I'm not going to claim one is more true than the other, since there's evidence for both "manipulating" and "not manipulating" and to me, the truth falls somewhere in the middle. I'm sure the thought has probably crossed his mind, but I don't actually think he's good enough at charm to follow through on that, which I will now elaborate on in INTRICATE detail....
Astarion isn't actually concerned about being likeable, or wanted within the group--or, rather, he may be concerned about it (because there's both safety and danger in a group setting), but he also isn't concerned about it enough to not advocate entirely for self-preservation and selfishness at generally every turn. He also isn't concerned about winning over the group enough to abdicate his firmest belief: that the tadpole is an advantage they should use, and a power he intends to keep.
And, if you relent to the group, he calls you spineless in the face of everyone else. So he's not afraid to insult you, Tav, either, certainly not to preserve some loose semblance image of ""charming,"" which he's already really bad at maintaining in general, because his brand of everything can just as easily piss people off as compel. Bad taste central.
Hell, his intro scene displays this best: He lures you in with a silly little lie that makes him sound weaker than he is ("You can kill it, can't you? Like you killed the others!") and then he strikes when your back is turned. Shallow charm is an accessible tool, he doesn't have the patience for long-lasting plots or extended slinky charm. Or if he does, and he's been manipulating all of us, he's not doing a great job, since half the party is making faces at him the whole time. Buuut....
During the mirror conversation, if you tell him vanity is a weakness:
(Text - Astarion: It's an indulgence, I'll grant you, but a weakness? A well-presented face can open a lot of doors.)
There is an awareness of beauty and charm that Astarion references often. He isn't really afraid to objectify himself for his own means, or being perceived as weaker than he is (except in certain circumstances). He knows these things are quite relevant, socially. Beautiful people are treated better. Beautiful people typically can get away with more. Actually I could probably approach this from a Class and Wealth related lens too, because his history as a magistrate probably also influences this mindset a lot, but that is. a THIRD separate essay.
He seeks to be strong enough to beat Cazador, at least partly through the same means that Cazador himself uses. The tadpoles give us absolute authority, in the end, and Astarion has zero qualms inflicting onto others what was inflicted onto him when we use them. But prior to the tadpole, what tools did Astarion have at his disposal? Very few, and most of them revolved around empty charm, quick-thinking, and trying to predict unpredictable moods and then enduring whatever came of those moods. That hollow charm falls under these kinds of tools, which gave him very short-term influence over at least the people he would lure back to Cazador. Likely the only form of control or power he had within all of that, and where he himself was without control as his entire being was under someone else's thumb. And those habits will likely persist for awhile, until he relearns who and what he wants to do and be outside of Cazador's purview. Which could mean anything, this is not to make him sound softer than he is or sweeter than he is. His vainglorious bitch syndrome is 4D chess of truth and not truth, empty cloying, vicious lashing out, and 10 degrees of identity issues wrapped up in all of that, so it's difficult to pin down just one thing as Real or Not Real, and I don't think even he knows what's Real and Not Real right now.
#Hi Sorry. Guess who can't shut up. That's me.#astarion#bg3 meta#bg3#This is fairly incoherent rambling.... I didn't actually have an end in mind when I started talking so you can hear the#pepe silvia meme vc in the background here#COMPLEX CHARACTERIZATION indeed. I want to bite down and chew on him#I'm still not sold on any of this either -- my interpretation of him shifts with the wind and every other thing he says#But these are my first.. initial... thoughts anyways...#thank you again for asking! so sweet of you hgfhghf
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in no way i mean to offend you but. my friend. your version of sebastian is just. i mean down to the last bit it's just leliana.
Hello! I'm actually glad you sent this because I've been thinking about their differences and similarities and would love the chance to talk about it.
So, heres the thing. I feel like its easy to model a Better Sebastian off Leliana. They are both people with awful pasts, who enjoy violence and try to rationalize it, and who find comfort in their faith. Also, I think it's easy to type cast a character as "religious" rather than exploring the personal links that person has to their faith and how it may differ from others.
But ultimately, my better version of Seb that lives in my head? He's still pretty chantry conservative compared to Leliana. And the violence thing is s l I g h t l y different. Leliana is a lot of things but I wouldn't say her main motivation is often revenge, whereas Sebs defo is.
1. Theology
Leliana, you'll recall has some WILD opinions about the maker. Her opinions remind me a little of Julian of Norwich, a fourteenth century anchoress who hints at universalisation, believes god spoke to her directly, and had intense views about the love of God (Leliana and Julian is a seperate post but god I'd love to chat about it someday). Leliana believes:
Members of the chantry should have sexual and romantic relationships including the Divine. These relationships are not only morally correct, they are gifts from the Maker and divine in themselves
God did not abandon creation but instead is in creation, everywhere
God can actively talk to individuals as God did to Leliana, usually in visions. He uses this to shape the world
Meanwhile, Sebastian is waaaaay more conservative. Like. St Anselm sorta vibes of the poor man running into the ditch and getting punished by God for it vibes. I mean. Think of all the changes Leliana makes if she becomes divine, even to scripture itself. Do you think Sebastian would uphold any of that?
And that's not necessarily a bad thing! I want Sebastian to think about what it means to be holy, but I don't think he should abandon basic chantry principles because he IS a conservative character. He's a member of the royal family! He has a lot to gain by sticking to tradition and will have been raised to do so.
So yeah, Seb should realise Anders and many others do more for the poor than the chantry. But also he should maintain basic principles of faith such as the maker has abandoned his children, people need to do penance before the maker to atone for their sins.
I mean, the REASON Seb is the way he is is that he thinks that a lot of what he wants/desires is sinful and that he should be punished for that. He's got the Catholic guilt that Leliana couldn't even dream of having.
Also I want Seb to be celebate for the right reasons (he thinks it's what the maker wants him to do rather than something he has to do to stay in the chantry) but that doesn't mean I don't want him to think that the maker wants him to do that. THE MAKER WANTS HIM TO DO THAT. It's how he remains close to the maker.
Basically, Sebs Theology aligns more with Cassandra than it EVER could with Leliana
Why did they turn to religion?
Leliana may have been a bad person before, but she hid in Lothering Chantry because she was already devout and religious. She had suffered tremendously, been tortured and her faith had steadied her through that.
Sebastian Vael? He's a prince and he was basically forced into this. He was an unruly third son so they bonked him in the chantry to try and make him well behaved.
And that's SUCH a difference between the two? Sebastian will ALWAYS feel that struggle between who he was and who is he now, and the fact that he was cohersed into the chantry even if he approves of it now. Leliana wasn't cohersed into anything and found a way to reconcile both her love of violence and her job with the chantry. Speaking of...
What is their violence used for?
Also. Another thing is. Seb doesn't use violence FOR the chantry. The closest he comes is invading Kirkwall for harbouring Anders, but again, that's more personal revenge than violence for the chantry itself to further the chantrys aims. Sebastian instead draws this VERY neat line between violence which is "more fun than the chantry" and the chantry itself which is a life of prayer and devotion.
For Leliana, by Inquisition, she is using violence FOR the chantry. Leliana believes that she is skilled at violence and enjoys using it, but it's not about revenge narratives for her, it's about furthering the cause that she deems right (which is why imo hardened divine Leliana is the most dangerous, because like. Hmm. That is a woman who could VERY easily start a crusade and feel it was justified). While her killing Marjolenne if you go down that route is revenge, it's also...practical? Lelianas violence is strategic, it's thought out, it's done for specific aims and reasons. Marjolenne could VERY easily become a threat again and stop Leliana entering Orlesian society once more. Her death frees Leliana in a very practical way. And most of Lelianas other violence we see in inquisition, the books or DA2 just. Isn't for revenge at all.
What motivates their violence?
For Leliana I think it comes down to the fact that she's good at it, that it's fun, and that it gets her where she needs to be. It's both entertainment and practical. She uses it FOR other people and herself, to further the aims of her in-group be it the chantry or her lover or the inquisition. Violence is mediated before it's enacted and it's enacted to get the correct outcome.
Violence for Leliana is also not really...personal? She can kill and hurt with such coldness and detachment as she shows throughout inquisition. She can even do so with old friends.
For Sebastian, violence is intrinsically linked to revenge and so is ALWAYS personal. Revenge is at the core of Sebastian's character. Every act reminds us of that. Leliana is, in her way, merciful particularly softened and I think that's her natural inclination. Seb? He's revenge driven. He can't see Mercy without a strong religious hand to make him. Kill those who hurt you and the ones you care for is basically his motto. He doesn't know how to exist outside of this paradigm of revenge and shows he hasn't learnt by the end based on his decision to invade Kirkwall because Hawke didn't kill Anders. And he doesn't ever really think about the outcome of these things? Like. Annexing Kirkwall?? Seriously?? That's gonna have huge political implications but Sebastian can't care because Elthina is dead and that's PERSONAL.
So yeah. Big picture Leliana vs. personal small picture Seb in terms of how they operate with violence.
How well do they know themselves?
I think Leliana is VERY honest with herself and very self reflective. Even in inquisition when she "nearly lost herself" she still thinks hard about how to get what she wants. She KNOWS she's an instrument of violence and she knows she's good at it and is going to use it self conciously to further the inquisitions aims. Otherwise she wouldn't be as good as she is at it! She clocks exactly why she might have made a mistake and if her emotions got involved. ("I was being sentimental" about pulling back her scouts)
Sebastian is deceptive. He's deceptive from himself. He wants to be the good guy and he pretends he is, but he's actually a shadow of revenge sneaking about. When he wants something he tries to justify it over and over even if it isn't logical to the rest of his belief system because hes the good chantry boy and he needs people to believe that because HE needs to believe it because otherwise he's a bad person and he wants to be good SO bad.
Leliana is okay being religiously a bit of a weird one and so doesn't need to conform to some ideal standard. Hell she LIKES being seen as a bit odd as the gauntlet for the sacred ashes reveals. She likes being unique. Seb doesn't want to be unique he wants to be the perfect religious choir boy....he just also wants all this other stuff that's counter to that so he has to be self deceptive about it.
To conclude
In my head, Seb and Leliana are distinctly different characters. They may have some surface level similarity and they are arguably two of the most overtly religious companions in the games, but Seb is personal, vengeance driven and conservative and Leliana sees the bigger picture, is self conscious and very liberal in her theological thinking.
#leliana#Sebastian Vael#ask#thanks for prompting this!!#there are other things#but its 11:30 and i gotta be at work early tomorrow rip me#any thoughts from anyone else about this?
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I
C R A V E
more Donnie VS The World content. It makes me vibrate and scream and wiggle like I'm off my meds. I would love anything, even a solid block of text, but your doodles/full artworks/comics are my favorite.
Please? All I've found so far is what we see in the donnieverse comic and the MVA/AMV (music video animatic/animatic music video). So many questions, like - is Casey (Sr) involved in any way, whethercas a fellow captive or rescue mission teammate? Is this the True Apocalypse or Averted Apocalypse timeline? If the latter, where is Casey (Jr)? How is Splinter handling it? (Is he even still alive to be Having Emotions About It?)
(Please feed me.
B L E A S E)
(If you don't mind, could you show/tell how Donnie escapes, one of his first Big Leads that gives him so much hope he cries, and/or the Big Reunion? One would be nice, two would be great, and all three would be amazing. If they aren't planned/are too spoilery, that's okay. Anything you can/are willing to give would be lovely.)
Thank you!! I'm glad you like it : ) I don't think I've answered many asked about this particular au, so i'm more than willing to talk about it! : )
I don't really have much up for it, mostly b/c it deals with a lot of angsty material that i can be a little uneasy about posting. I have a bit of old concept art, and an unposted fic i'm editing/rewriting (b/c it's the first fic i wrote for Rise and i did not have those character voices down lol.) I can probably post the first bits of it later this week. I did say at one point that i would once 'proud family tradition' was over, and it now is.
but yeah, here's the concept art, i'll put the explanation under the break b/c i'm going to be rambling lol.
So Donnie vs. takes place after the thwarted apocalypse (not-apocalypse future). They get taken by Bishop a few months afterwards, and it isn't until about a year after that, that Donnie gets free.
He's the last one still with Bishop at that point, and had been told/convinced through various means that his brothers were dead.
Bishop did a lot of experiments on him, leaving a lot of scaring. One of which was injecting him with Krang DNA to see what would happen. (the eye and veins thing. I think he has some side effects from that but i'm not entirely certain what they are atm)
The fic itself starts after his rescue, b/c i'm focusing on Donnie's search for his brothers (and his own recovery) Rather than the traumatic event itself.
The rescue itself, was certainly a rescue. April, Casey, and CJ worked together to get him out of there as well as gain whatever information they could before they were found out. (Casey went undercover and was able to get some incomplete files and help get donnie out before she was discovered and had to leave.)
donnies in...pretty bad shape at that point, mentally and physically. Physically, he's malnurished, injured, scared, the works. Bishop did a number on him in the year he had him.
Mentally, he's pretty much shut down. He's completely non-verbal, unresponsive most of the time, when he does respond it's very slow and seemingly difficult for him to do so. He describes it that it feels like he's behind several plates of thick glass. He can see and hear what's happening, interacting (or even just feeling anything about it) is very hard to get past the glass.
How he goes from that state to hunting down his brothers is fairly simple. One of the broken, encripted files Casey acquired was Leo's file. None of the three could open it, but they managed to get Donnie to try to do so. He manages it, sees the file, and for the first time in about a year, has hope. He doesn't even wait to show the other three, he just takes off while no one was looking, with April's laptop and CJ's coat (he steals a backpack along the way.)
I don't really want to say much past that. A lot of the rescues/reunions are pretty spoiler heavy, and i don't want to ruin some of the mystery of what's going on in the fic. But know this, he does get all his brothers (and family in general) back. Also, splinter is alive and is part of this, but again, that's spoilers for some things i don't want to ruin.
Again, i'll probably start posting this sometime this week. It's an interesting fic that i've put quite a bit of time into at this point, so i'll be excited to see what is thought of it.
Thank you!
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Hi! I've recently gotten into homestuck and I've read quite a bit of it, as well as other people's blogs analyzing and criticizing the media. I've heard a Lot about Dave's arc being centered around internal homophobia and toxic masculinity, so it surprised me to hear taht you disagreed! I was wondering why you think that, and what are your thoughts on what his arc actually is? I know you don't like writing about the alpha/beta kids, so feel free to ignore this ask completely if you want. Thank you, I hope you have a great day!
Hello, Anon! I'm glad you've been having fun with Homestuck lately!! Despite its many flaws, it is a deeply compelling piece of fiction, and I'm always glad to see new eyes on it and new voices being added to the analytical sphere. To answer your question...
Personally, I have never seen what people are talking about with regards to Dave's whole character arc surrounding overcoming Internalized Homophobia and Toxic Masculinity. These are fundamentally not what his arc is about, and this is never what his arc has ever been about. I'd honestly never seen that analytical lens until after DaveKat rose into prominence (mostly due to Post-Canon's heavy featuring of the pairing), and I feel as if these things are related. It is easier to make easy-to-stomach, shippy angst out of addressing your own personal shortcomings than what Dave's arc is actually about. No shade intended. This is because...
Dave's character arc is, and always has been, about Recovering from Childhood Abuse.
This is the conflict we are made aware of in his introduction, and it's a theme that persists all throughout the story. We meet Dave as a 13 year old boy suffering some pretty extreme abuse at the hands of Bro- Physically, Mentally, Emotionally, and Sexually. Dave's home life is such an active threat that he struggles to even admit to himself that it is abuse in the first place- that's an admission that takes a level of vulnerability that he just could not afford, and it's something he's only left to truly unpack during the Meteor Arc.
I have a couple major problems with the "Toxic Masculinity and Internalized Homophobia" takes.
Firstly, Toxic Masculinity is not inherent to any expression of Masculinity. The only Toxically Masculine trait we see that's applicable to Dave is that he struggles deeply with vulnerability and sincerity in his emotions. However... These don't really have anything to do with what his views on what a man is or should be. They have everything to do with the fact that he was abused by someone who punishes any display of weakness, because Bro excused his abuse with it being "Training".
Secondly... Dave is Bisexual. Even if the process of Dave struggling to accept being attracted to men was a major point in the story, it would not be called Internalized Homophobia. It would be called Internalized Biphobia, because Dave is canonically Bisexual, not Gay. We have seen Dave be attracted to more women than men, and attraction to both genders was present simultaneously. It was not Compulsory Heterosexuality. If it was, it'd be actually written into the story. Bisexual people exist. This is not a Homophobic argument to make; I am literally a Gay man.
It's anthropologically fascinating how this take arose... Basically out of nowhere from my perspective, especially considering how all of Dave's most iconic dramatic lines have something to do with him having to sort through his own abuse.
Does no one remember the rooftop scene between Dave and Dirk, where Dave starts telling Dirk all about the horrible way that Bro raised him, and how deeply it affected him?
If not, I'm posting the most striking part of it here.
[Homestuck, page 7749.]
... So, yeah, no. Dave's character arc is not about "Overcoming Toxic Masculinity and Internalized Homophobia". It's about Abuse. Dave is an Abuse Victim. Point blank period.
Any trait even loosely attributable to the ideas of Toxic Masculinity and Internalized Homophobia are a consequence of how he was raised, and how he was abused. This does not mean that this is what his character arc is about. That just means that's included within his character arc. It's a way to show growth, not a way to define his arc in its entirety. That is legitimately not how character writing works. To claim such would be to express a remarkable amount of Tunnel Vision.
Inclusion does not equate to Totality. There is a bigger picture, and that bigger picture is Abuse Recovery.
#homestuck#homestuck meta#homestuck analysis#homestuck fandom#beta kids#beta guardians#dave strider#bro strider#cw abuse#cw child harm#dave.pdf#nekro.pdf#nekro.sms
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Barista! Angel x Ren
hi hi <3! this is my first time posting on tumblr abt some of my favorite vns! To start us off, we've got Ren from 14DWY!! go check out the creator @14dayswithyou for more info about the characters!
You've picked up a job at Corland Bay! You thought about going to this one library nearby but you opted out when you heard a new cafe was opening up!
After all, coffee shops tended to be a meetcute in many books, who's to say that those are just fictional?
Things were a bit rough at first, you had your amount of rough customers, you had to get a hang of the machines, etc.
Soon enough, you got better and better at your job! You even got a pay raise!
Your boss is an asshole sometimes, but he seems to care a little.
But recently there’s been like this really cute guy recently who keeps coming on your shifts you've noticed.
Toiling away talking to karens, dealing with coffee machine malfunctions, your job sure is rough...
But luckily, this adorable stranger's here to make up for any mishaps!
(and every night lmao, when he goes to... eliminate anyone who bothered you at work)
He always chooses to eat your favorite things and always asks what you recommend everyday, such a sweetheart !!
"Wh-What would you recommend..." He pauses, his eyes averted from yours. They flicker up at your nametag before flushing at the name, the mere thought of saying their angel's name leaving him tongue-tied. "...A-Angel?"
Little do you know that whatever you say goes through one ear and out the other, Ren far too focused in drinking up every image of you so he can commit it to memory.
Maybe if you were a bit more perceptive, you'd notice the way he inhaled a bit deeper, leaned in a little more closer as you talked.
God, was he glad that there weren't as many customers this early in the morning.
He always asked how your day was and tips you a little extra for your troubles
(You're kind of curious about where he gets all the spare cash from... But you're not arguing !! After all, it's more money to spend on Haruko merchandise !)
He’s so shy and gets so flustered around you, you just wanna reach over and pinch his cheeks.
"D'you want a drink with that?"
Ren, who was just leaning his face on his hand, staring at your kissable lips, was promptly shaken out of his stupor. His face flushes, clearly not have expected to be asked something again.
"M-Mhm! I-I'll let you choose, I'm sure whatever you choose would be delicious no matter what!" He enthusiastically nodded with a twinge of nervousness to his words.
You let out a chuckle that sounds angelic to him before adding that to his order.
He always wants to find a way to spend some more time talking to you, he wants to keep you all to himself !
And he always hangs around until you’re done with your shift!! (you don’t notice him tho) but he’s waiting for the day that you do!!
He makes sure you get home safe, after all, we wouldn't want any creeps following his precious angel home, hmm?
He’s always on his phone, looking at photos of you through the cameras in the coffee shop while eating/drinking his order! His angel chose it specifically for him...
If he sees you gushing over a fictional character during your break, you can guarantee he’s going to start using subtly similar mannerisms.
If it's what gets you closer to him, then Ren wouldn't hesitate!
After all, he loves you so much, he's soooo patient for you to love him back !
So if you get the chance, won’t you pleaase write your number on his coffee cup next time~?
#14 days with you#ren 14dwy#ren x reader#yandere#visual novel#ren 14 days with you#14dwy#14dwy ren#🧨headcanons
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Hi! Okay so you seem like a very well-read person and I’d love to know if you have a list of your favorite Merlin fics. I just bookmarked all the ones you recommended in relation to the 10 best episodes and now I need more! I’m going on a training camp and would love to have something fairly long to download to my kindle so I can read on flights and when I don’t have data 🥰
Thanks so much in advance!
(Also, I LOVE your writing, I’m so glad to be part of this fandom with talented people like you!)
Hey! Thank you so much for your kind words! OF COURSEE I'd love to recommend you some fics! Likewise— the creativity of this fandom never ceases to amaze me :)
*cracks knuckles and pretends my eyes aren't lighting up rn because my time has finally come*
Long fic recs (50K-100K+)
1. to the world that never let you be by ImperialMint. Look. I'll hand out my own throat so willingly to any scar reveal fic. The trope is just so dear to my heart, and this one in particular was something else. It broadly covered every single feeling you might be looking for in a Merlin fic, and its characterization of both Arthur and Merlin was top tier. I basically sell my soul to any fic that does justice to their characterization, and this one did so much more than that.
2. What I'd Have Done by @flight-of-fantasy. I solemnly swear you will never read something like this fic. I read it in one day from how on edge I was all the time. I had to recount it to my friends in the timespan of three hours because of how much screaming and dramatic pauses there was. Simply, the brilliance of plot here is unmatched. Arthur's characterization as a strategist shook my innards, and Merlin's unapologetic nature was chef's kiss. It's so hard not to give away the plot while recommending this so just.. just read it.
3. Redemption by flakedice, Zerda. Soon, you will find a parallel post to the best 10 episodes with the worst 10, featuring first and foremost The Disir. Honest to God, I could literally go on ages ranting about how much agony this episode brought me. It was the blow that awoke my eyes to the possibility of fuck, this show isn't going to end well. I once thought about shitting on that episode like I did with 5×13 in My heart is readily yours, but fics like these hold me back because they already gave us everything. It gave us the ending we deserved. Gold. Everything in this was gold. The world building, the character development, the fact that Arthur has been given time. Truly a fix-it that fix-ed my heart.
4. Talking about deviations from The Fucking Disir, The World I Built for You by Fulgance is a must. It was the first fic I've read from the How They Didn't Find Out (magic reveal one-shots) series, and from then on I was * s o l d *. Whichever fic you decide to read from this, I guarantee you, you will have the time of your life. Fulgance is the one author I will always recommend without a shadow of a doubt. There is not a single work of theirs that will disappoint you. They will only break you.
5. Deep In My Heart I'm Concealing by @citharaposts. True story about this fic, I squealed when I read its summary. “I'm not standing here as a king, Merlin!” was the quickest catalyst to ever make me start a fic. I specifically wrote a spoiler-free comment for the author and left it in the first chapter so that anyone who's thinking about whether or not to go into yet another 100K fic will rest assured that it's an amazing ride. Have real fun with this one.
6. It Was One Kingdom, Once by queerofthedagger. Two things, if they happen, you leave everything behind and go thank your God for blessing you with it: @queerofthedagger posting a new Merlin fic, and it being a Royal Hanahaki AU. Like so many other tropes the author has nailed, this was the best Hanahaki I've ever read (across fandoms). It's so intricate and detailed and the world building is on another level. If our world was burning and I had only one thing to save, it'll be the works of this author.
Hope I helped, and hope you have so much fun in your camp!◕ᴗ◕
[Short fic recs]
#merlin fic recs#the one thing I know how to do#this fandom is sustained by the brilliance of fic writers#we redo bbc writers' shitty work#and we ask nothing but kudos and maybe a fanart every once in a while#merlin#arthur pendragon#bbc merlin#merlin bbc#merthur#ao3#merlin x arthur#merlin fic#fic recs#king arthur#archiveofourown#bbcm#LJ recs#regulusrules answers#regulusrules recs
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My One-Year Anniversary
One year ago today, I wrote my very first piece of House of the Dragon fanfiction.
My journey in fanfiction has been a long one. I started reading fan works all the way back in 2009 at the age of 12. I even remember the site: Harry Potter Fanfiction Archive. Wow. Wild! Of course, I naturally gravitated toward Dramione works—because that’s what you did, right? Since then, my tastes have diversified; evolved, even. Thank god.
Until I hopped onto Tumblr and started writing, I wasn’t an active member of any fan community. I was a passive lurker, hiding my enjoyment of fan works from everyone and everything. One of my favourite fandoms to read for was Game of Thrones; I particularly enjoyed the Jonsa works and any work where Daenerys claimed the Iron Throne (#JusticeForDany!). I will say that, as much as I enjoyed it, there were no characters who truly ignited my interest.
Then, House of the Dragon hit. Matt Smith’s portrayal of Daemon is just… electric. I suppose my very first thank-you is to him for bringing the character to our screens. Holy shit. Toxic, passionate, magnetic… everything I want in a fictional man! Daemon Targaryen definitely awoke something in me. I spent about a month trawling the Tumblr and AO3 feeds for Daemon x OC/ Reader works, seeking to satisfy my thirst. Daemyra is such a charismatic pairing in canon, but I could never really see myself in Rhaenyra’s shoes; she’s so forward in a way I’m not. So many of the works at that time were centred on badass powerful OCs, and I just… couldn’t relate. Thus,I officially opened my AO3 account and started a side-blog on Tumblr, posting my first work.
It was a smut piece between Daemon and a Reader-insert niece, and one of my first genuine attempts at writing smut - what is now today the second chapter of dōnus riñus (sweet girl) - and was surprised to receive positive feedback from it, given the um, dodgy themes. It spurred me to go back and write a chapter leading up to it, and then write another three chapters post-chapter 2. Then, people wanted to know how Reader and Daemon got together; I wrote gevivys (beauty) from his perspective in an absolute flurry of insanity, pushing out like a chapter a day. It all blew up - I never expected it to, and it is still incredibly surprising to me that people are wanting to read a protracted series about the shit I make these characters do! From there, ilībītsos (little slut) was underway, which was such a fun exercise in dirtybadwrong that I thoroughly enjoyed! Pretty much straight away, I continued on with ñuhus prumȳs (my heart), which I might say is my favourite instalment of the bunch due to the sheer amount of research I put into it. I'm particularly proud of that one, I must say!
Of course, this makes it sound quick. It wasn't - I have quite a busy personal life with my work, so I've not been the quickest at updating. I'm eternally fucking grateful to have an audience that completely doesn't care how often I update, so long as I'm proud of what I'm putting out at the end; I know how rare that is, and I'm absolutely boggled by you all. My squishies. I love you!
Reader has become Babey now - she has her own, like, following? IDK. It's insane to me. She doesn't even have a name, and yet there are so many people who have reached out to me to thirst over her or to talk about her or to share what she means to them. A lot of people have really resonated with the way she struggles with powerlessness and how, in some ways, she's learned to find strength for herself in a world that gives her so little opportunity to do so. I'm so incredibly glad she is a character that people can relate to. She's like my baby, my first genuine creation, and it is a privilege and honour to get to talk about her on here. I still cannot believe there are people out there willing to make art or edits or just send in asks about her. It's completely wild!
I have endless gratitude for so many people throughout the creation of this series, but we must all begin (and end) somewhere. I’d like to start by thanking my first ‘regular’, Wilma, for her enthusiasm and engagement with me as I first started on this journey. She definitely encouraged me to keep on writing. It was thrilling to wake up to another comment or ask from her about the series! If not for Wilma, I don’t think the series would’ve gotten off the ground as it has.
Thank you to my very first friend in fandom. I’ve only ever known this person as ‘Lemon’—they reached out to me when I was well and truly established during the writing of ilībītsos (little slut), helping me to conceptualise the idea for the third chapter of that instalment. They then jumped aboard as a writer, and so much of my earlier drive to write was inspired by them. If not for their messages and their companionship, I wouldn’t have begun to build the community I have now. They are still one of my fandom besties, and I love them dearly.
There are several important people I’d like to thank for being absolute superstars, and whose passion for fandom has impacted mine so greatly. Aubrey, Pancake, AQ—I’ve adored each and every comment you’ve left me, and it’s been such an incredible experience to get to know you all as people. Mage, Hannah—y’all are amazing writers and amazing human beings, and I’m so grateful to have gotten to know you. Bel, Fae, Mars, Mel, Rach—you’re groovy, and hanging out with you in Discord is the bomb-dot-com. If I'm leaving people out, my bad!
I would be remiss, of course, if I didn’t mention one particular person. We connected through a mutual friend (at the time), and eventually bonded over our love of being incredibly nasty, feral and disgusting over our love of these Targ boys. Pretty sure we speak at least every single day, and I can’t say how many times I’ve relied on her for input on a chapter or a specific plot point I’m planning. Her approval means everything to me, and so I can’t possibly go without crediting her as a major influence on this story. Ange—Angela—thank you. You’ve become one of my best friends, fandom and IRL. I absolutely love you to bits.
And, lastly, I want to thank everyone who has read my works along the way. It is still insane to me that there are people who think my writing is interesting enough to keep reading, let alone offer the outpouring of support I’ve received. It is one of the greatest parts of my day to be able to connect with others over a universe I’ve crafted, and the fact that people genuinely want to know these things just stuns me. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Your encouragement means everything to me.
So, it's been one year. I'm still going, ahahaha! Here's to (hopefully) more years to come! I love you guys!
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STEPHCLAIR IS BAD AND YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD
Alternative title: a very angry (and tired) Full Stop fan's thesis.
ok, so me being the stephan/sinclair comparison's strongest hater is a bit i really like to lean into, but for the sake of keeping things semi-serious i will try to keep the actual essay content as free of me ranting my frustrations as humanly possible (which i mean commitement to the bit aside this will be hard bc it is frustrating to see people calling them both the same character, at best it shows a very surface level understanding of either character and at worst it shows just reducing them to cookie cutter meme fandom archetypes neither character actually fits into, so bear with me if i slip up and make unserious comments from time to time)
so before i start the actual essay let me say this: this essay doesnt even scratch the surface of how much i hate this comparison you guys cant even possibly fucking imagine ive been obssessed and i mean OBSSESSED with the full stop office since 2021 and im glad i wasnt in the limbus prerelease fanbase because if i had to see people comparing my beautiful boy and beloved best friend to a guy we had no info about other than "hes based of the guy from demian" i would have turned into the joker this is not even about saving my own mental health this is about sparing the entire pjm fandom of the monster i would have turned into
spoilers for ruina and limbus, universe terminology heavy and surface level references and interpretations of demian by herman hesse because imma keep it real with you guys the first and only time i read that book i was still in high school and i barely remember shit.
Table of contents:
Stephan - a summary
Sinclair - a summary
2.1. Emil Sinclair in Demian (1919)
2.2. Emil Sinclair in Limbus Company (2023)
Addressing common arguments
1.- Stephan - a summary
And of course I will start with Stephan, because I love him very much, just like Liwei he's one of my favorite pjm characters (yeah i like him more than your favorite popular character don't ask) so it's not surprising that i have A Lot to say about him, right?
And of course, I do.
As I said in the serrated duo post, a core part of my perception of the Full Stop office depends on the fact that they are poor. Mentions of money are common all across many factions in the game, yes, but the Full Stops are extremely constant about money, how taking a wrong turn means losing more than they can afford, how they can't afford to drop their weapons because they were too expensive, how even getting the permissions to be able to buy and wield these weapons was ridiculously expensive and so on. Of course, Stephan is the one talking about this the most (something I will elaborate on later), but Liwei and Tamaki also make a few ocassional mentions to it in their dialogue and keypages and considering this is a shared business it just makes sense that this is something that affects all of them.
These are just some few of the callbacks to money that Stephan alone does in his dialogue, without focusing in keypage text or what Liwei and Tamaki have to say about it.
And idk man, at least to me the difference between social classes is an important aspect for their characterization, specially because of how constant the concern with money is for Stephan. From this point alone comparing them feels like erasing a core aspect of Stephan's characterization, a lot about Stephan (and the Full Stop office as a whole, let's be real here) starts making more sense once you read the office as lower-middle class (and I'm saying lower middle class because they can afford some place to live and their weapons, but to me these guys are the types who precisely because of their need to keep bullets at all times can't pay for water or electricity all the time and sometimes they simply can't afford food or if they do they can spend a week straight eating nothing but unsalted pasta).
Now, going back to Stephan being the most outward about his complaints with money, he is in general the most outward about all problems the office is facing, to the point in which he doesn't mind inconveniencing everyone else with his rants, being one of the few guests who interrupt Angela's introductory speech and getting into Tamaki's nerves (something he's well aware he's doing, as these two know each other) at least two times through the course of their pre-battle cutscene, even Roland comments after the reception on how he wishes he would always have been as open about his problems as Stephan was.
However, it's worth nothing that he doesn't spend the entire cutscene crying about his miseries, and he only starts losing hope at three key moments: when they can't kill Eileen inmediately (making them waste more bullets than needed), when Argalia shows up (forcing them to retreat and making them fail their mission, meaning they won't get paid for this after they already lost a ton of money, as well as turning the situation into something much more dangerous than what they had signed up for) and once they enter the Library (an Urban Plague grade threat they have little to no information about, when him and Tamaki are almost out of bullets so Liwei is essentially the only fixer with some chance of putting up a fight and, you know, making it out alive).
Now, while it's true that Stephan is someone who dislikes danger, he isn't someone who isn't used to seeing gruesome events, his instinctive reaction to seeing a guy getting his head put into a meat grinder was cracking jokes and calling the concept of thought gears "a load of horseshit", which is something that falls in line with him being a somewhat experienced Fixer (sure, grade 5 isn't amazing but we can assume it's still either in the higher side of average or barely above average, and for someone specialized in firearms, which are far from the best weapon in the city, getting that high means he must have some experience and skill, right? more so considering he's been at this for 5 years at most) who has seen a fair share of horrid shit and can be unfazed by (most of) it as long as his own safety isn't on the line.
Another point is... he dislikes danger and is always wary about money and expenses, to the point in which he enjoys checking his bank account (or at least he believes so, if we go for the theory of the artbook profiles being more a mix of what the characters perceive themseves as/would describe themselves as to others, which is a theory i go by, I see him as someone who's convinced he does that for fun instead as out of desperation), but this seems to be more a generalized feeling of impending doom at everything rather than something that can be traced back to a particular traumatic event (anything can be dangerous, anything can cost him money), dude's from the backstreets after all, he's seen shit and he's used to assuming the worst. How I see Stephan, he's a guy who already expects bad things to happen but once things go wrong he starts freaking out about how this time They're Screwed For Real, but he never really tricks himself into believing "maybe things will turn out just fine this time?" or who thinks "well, we've done this before, surely we can handle it again."
This is not very related to Stephan as a character in terms of personality but I think it's still an important point to make as it is particularly related to body mods, his physical condition and his body shape.
So we can easily say that Stephan is a strong dude, at least if compared to real world standards without the fancy and insane body mods we see people in the city have access to. He carries that huge rifle around with his bare hands, something that Tamaki doesn't do and that not even Stephan himself in earlier iterations of his dessign did, and his main talent (which based of my theories is something that can be assumed as "something he's proud enough of to consider it the thing he does best") is physical labor.
Pictured, Tamaki's talksprite, carrying a rifle almost as long as she is tall with a strap supporting the weight on her shoulders, like a normal person.
Also pictured, an earlier iteration of Stephan's dessign, carrying the same rifle his current version does, but also holding it with the help of a similar strap supporting the weight on his shoulders.
And finally, Stephan's current dessign, holding that shit with his bare fucking hands in an exhibition of his brute animal strength, what the fuck is wrong with this man (affectionate)
And Stephan's artbook profile, the important part here is his speciality being physical labor, not only he's strong but he aknowledges this.
However, I made a point about the Full Stop office being poor, right? Even Roland says that "giving a whole office augmentation procedures is cheaper than keeping a decent supply of bullets in stock" (not the exact phrasing).
At least personally, I see this as Roland essentially saying "it would be cheaper (and more efficient) to get body mods for everyone in the office and buy another (cheaper) type of weaponry instead", but as things stand, the Full Stops can afford to either buy more ammunition and maintain their weapons, OR to get body mods, and since their whole deal is firearms... well, they can't really Stop investing in them, meaning they have no body mods At All and they got their grades purely out of their own physical strength.
Similarly, Stephan makes a similar point about how body augmentations are required for people to be able to run while carrying their weapons around (specifically talking about the rifles he and Tamaki use).
And... you know, the whole point is that they couldn't run carrying their weapons because they were too heavy, Argalia mocked them for that, Liwei urged them to drop their weapons, something they refused to do because of the prices.
Lastly on this point, while it's true that Ruina talksprites have a very bad case of Long Anime Legs (to the point in which how Roland's legs take about 2/3 of his height is a common joke), if we focus only on his head and torso, Stephan looks pretty Wide, and not only because he's wearing thick, fluffy and multilayered clothing, as other characters wearing similar clothing styles still look thinner than him.
This is all to say: I don't think this guy is a twink, or thin at all. He's a prime example of the strongman build to me and this is yet another hill I'm willing to die on watch project moon turn him into a beanpole once he inevitably shows up in limbus and me turning into the first real world distortion as a consequence.
Finally, Stephan is very notoriously the most informal member of the office, not only being the only one who doesn't wear any sort of formal clothing fully prioritizing comfort and practicality over looks but also completely disregarding formalities with his attitude at work (again, he interrupts Angela's introductory monologue, and again, his first two lines when being introduced are him cracking jokes), being the only member of the office to swear on screen and using several informal expressions and metaphors through both the reception dialogue and his keypage story.
And for good measure, he's a compilation of Stephan being the creature he is.
The literal introduction of the characters, also known as the moment in which Stephan became one of my favorite characters because he's Just Like Me Fr
Very normal behavior for someone who hates blood and violence and isn't used to seeing it. This man is more than capable (and willing, assuming money is involved) to murder kill.
Which, I mean, this attitude is very different from what we see from Sinclair.
2.- Sinclair, a summary
In retrospect I probably should have made this one first because I'm gonna be honest with you, Sinclair is one of the sinners I care about the least (I still like him and think he's pretty cool mind you I just don't vibe too much with most of the tropes making up the character) so what I have to say about him is less me grasping for straws and subtext because I don't care enough about him to be bothered with a super serious and in depth analysis like I did with Stephan and more things we can explicitly see about him in game and things that happen in the novel Demian.
And if I can have a small parenthesis here, people saying that one of my favorite pjm guys Ever is in any way similar to a guy who despite being pretty cool is just Not the type of character I fully vibe with... really, it gets annoying fast. Anyway back to the serious analysis now.
2.1- Emil Sinclair in Demian (1919)
To be able to understand Sinclair as he is depicted in Limbus Company, it is important to first be familiar with the source material of the original iteration of the character, that's it we're doing your high school homework by compiling several literary analysis of a symbolic psychological early 20th century autobiographical novel i hope you guys signed up for this (and if you didn't, though luck! i will do this anyway, I love literary analysis).
In the novel, young Emil finds himself torn between the worlds of light (which can be equated to the Garden of Eden, but it's more tangible meaning for our protagonist is his childhood home and family, a serene and well structure/organized space where he can be innocent, untainted by the evils of the outside world) and darkness (basically all the scary shit that goes on outside, where people do evil things for the sake of it), he finds himself tempted by the violence of the outside world, particularly through the actions of his classmate Franz Kromer, which eventually leads him to consider that due to being exposed to this tainted world of evil he no longer can return to the world of good and innocence.
Here, the character of Demian acts as a guide, someone who helps Sinclair to trascend this binary perception of good vs evil and to see himself as someone worthy of happiness because him witnessing the world of evil didn't taint him as a person but rather merely showed him another face of the world, Demian here mentions the Mark of Cain as a symbol of mental strenght and freedom, considering that bearers of this mark are capable of making their own choices and should be able to go beyond their assigned roles, being able to embody aspects of both worlds. This is to say that Demian's view is less focused on good vs evil, instead taking a more order vs chaos approach (without giving an explicit moral character to either).
In the book, the symbol of a bird breaking out of the egg is frequently used to represent Emil's personal growth, the egg represents safety and innocence, but a bird must eventually leave the egg or it will die, and getting out of the egg is a process than can be seen as violent, as a bird must fight to get out of the egg, and getting out of the egg represents birth but also an irreversible change, it can be seen as breaking out of the world of light and getting permanently in the world of darkness since a broken shell can't be fixed, but it can also mean achieving the enlightment and personal balance to not feel permanently bound to a condition, place or state of being and therefore growing as a person by learning to see himself as a whole human instead of supressing his "evil side" by only forcing the "good side" to surface.
Max Demian is here to show this second meaning of growth/self improvement (while also explaining that Sinclair is permamently growing and must always keep this balance between all the parts conforming the whole being that is himself rather that trying to make parts of himself antagonize each other). This idea of personal growth being one of the core themes of the book.
2.2- Emil Sinclair in Limbus Company (2023)
With Sinclair's source media analyzed (at a very surface level, mind you), we now can start talking about the depiction of Sinclair in Limbus Company, how it parallels the book, why the book symbolism is important for this instance of Sinclair and so on.
When we are first introduced to Sinclair in the game he's clearly nervous, he doesn't know what he's supposed to do as he hasn't worked for a similar company before and he isn't used to the gruesome sight of the bus eating people, this does fit inmediately in the motif of a naive person with limited experience about the world (well, to be fair to him most people won't be seeing man-eating buses at a regular basis, but the average backstreets dweller would be familiar with equally violent situations).
With this said, despite Sinclair's obviously nervous behavior... he isn't really a pessimist like Stephan was, in fact, almost every chapter (counting cantos, intervallos and the short mini chapters such as the Dante's notes update episode) have at least one key moment with him trying to rationalize horrible stuff as something much less violent, or simply going "but I thought this thing didn't work like this..." when confronted with the more horrible realities in the city. He thought the G corp veterans were really going to let them pass without a fight, he thought the people being controlled by headhens were just actors wearing mascot costumes, he thought mermaids were the beautiful half-woman half-fish creatures he heard about in fairy tales, and there's more examples but I don't really feel like looking for The Entire Fucking Plot Because This Guy Is An Actual Protagonist Instead Of A Background Guy Like Stephan Was to make my point clearer than it already is. And it's only when he realizes that the real world doesn't fit his expectations that he panics.
Well, there is one exception to this pattern: his own canto. Here, he panics inmediately as soon as K corp's nest is mentioned and spends the first half of the chapter pleading to turn back while saying that they are going to get killed. So what is different here with the rest of the plot?
Obviously, the fact that is related to his very own very personal very specific trauma. That is to say, unlike Stephan who is wary of anything that can put him on danger or cost him more money than it should, Sinclair has a very specific traumatic event that makes him act Like That (sure, he gets scared and nervous outside that, but these are more normal "I'm unfamiliar with this and I don't fully know how to react, this is normal behavior in a human being" reactions than outright "I am Actually Terrified due to being reminded of an actual traumatic event, this reaction is a textbook definition of post-traumatic stress disorder").
HOWEVER, Sinclair being someone who's deeply traumatized and kind of a scaredy cat when it comes to violence and unfamiliar situations... it doesn't mean that he's incompetent or a bad fighter. Almost all of his identities are terrifyingly good fighters (at least in their lore), Los Mariachis fear jefe Sinclair, Cinq director Sinclair is someone most association members are terrified to duel even during training, Blade Lineage Sinclair is considered a talented killer (it's also worth noting that save maybe for the mariachi one, in none of these mirror worlds Sinclair is precisely happy of being recognized as "the guy who's very scary when he fights people", unlike Stephan who I don't think he particularly likes killing but has a more "as long as I get paid..." mentality about it), the only "not very good at this" Sinclair id I can think of is the molar boatworks id where he's more a mechanic than a fighter so he fears he's lagging behind in that aspect. Hell, even the Canon Timeline so to speak (which is to say: his base identity) has him carrying that huge halberd, going on a frenzy attacking some already mutilated inquisitor's corpse, piercing through Guido's armor and dealing a fatal blow that finally killed him for real. To compare, Stephan is good at physical work, but we don't know about his close combat capacities other than the fact that he dislikes it, for Sinclair however we know he's terrifyingly good at physical combat.
Now, I've seen a lot of people call Sinclair a twink and while it's one of these words that nobody agrees on what it means, let's give it the benefit of doubt and say "alright, for the duration of this analysis let's settle on a twink being a young looking (regardless of actual age), thin man with almost no facial/body hair".
Since Sinclair is a rich guy (not just Any Rich Guy though, we're talking of someone whose family had ties to a Wing, probably not some elite guy like Daniel or Hong Lu, but not a self perceived "mediocre" nest dweller like Samjo either), and pressumably not very experienced in combat in most mirror worlds (we know he has no prior experience in the base one where he joined Limbus, at least), let's say that he has enough body mods for him to be much stronger than he looks like despite being thin, he does look thin and young and much to my dissapointment he also has no facial hair, so yeah, under this very broad definition of the term he is a twink.
However if you start adding personality archetypes to the definition he stops being one almost inmediately, as we've been shown time after time that his "submissive" attitude is mostly a result of him not knowing too well how to impose himself and just going along with what the rest say or do, but he's starting to grow tired of that ever since Hell's Chicken (even if he clearly still isn't great at that), as it should be more than obvious for anyone who even just googled "demian herman hesse literary analysis", Sinclair is undergoing a lot of changes even now, and the game is doing a good job at portraying that.
Honestly I also think he'd be hotter with a sleeper build but really, I don't care enough about him to argue about that.
And for the last point, precisely due to his upbringing as a rich guy AND his traumatic experience with Kromer, Sinclair is not only a very polite and mild mannered guy (again, unlike resident creature Stephan), but also he tries to take as little space as possible, both literally and metaphorically, as Dante notices near the end of canto 3 when they finally comment on how Sinclair never talks about his own problems until it's too late because he doesn't want to bother the others as they probably have it worse (again, unlike Stephan "i don't mind loweing team morale and making everyone in the room uncomfortable as long as i get to vent" Full Stop office).
3.- Adressing common arguments
Alright, now that I talked about each character, let's see some of the most common arguments I've seen people use to compare them.
"They look the same!" No, they don't. The only thing they have in common is being blonde but even their hairstyles are different with Sinclair having a simple bowl-ish cut with slightly wavy hair and Stephan having curlier hair (not to mention the whole point I made about body types because I'm the sort of lunatic who cares about that stuff). I won't even bother with this argument.
"They have the same personalities!" Again, they don't. Stephan is very cynical with a lot of his attitude being clearly derivated from him coming from a poor background and having stayed there his whole life, he also doesn't care about his cynism getting in the way and bothering everyone else. On the other hand, Sinclair is someone who could almost be described as naive due to having lived a sheltered childhood and only having his experiences with Kromer and his time at Limbus as moments of realizing that the rest of the world is Not Like His Childhood House, still believing that the world is a binary of good vs evil and expecting things to turn out fine or be much better than they actually are, just to be hit with the reality of the city Not being a nice place where people are nice and polite and not trying to kill him, this is not to say he doesn't have his own issues but even Dante notices during his Canto that Sinclair makes a point to avoid bothering everyone else with his personal problems, keeping them to himself even if that makes things worse on the long run.
"Both are opposed and harmed by a lunatic!" This is an argument I've seen a lot and is incredibly filmsy at best, half of the city's population are lunatics and the other half are people who got opposed by them some way or another. Will you say that Ishmael and the rest of the Pequod crew can be compared to the Full Stop office (or really, even mention the other Full Stop fixers instead of just focusing on Stephan because he happens to be blonde and can be compared to Sinclair) because of their situations with Ahab? Or the W Corp crew who got their train targetted by Jae-heon and Elena (or, you know, the train passengers who were turned into Love townspeople or puppets)? What about the Vermillion Cross who got killed by the Reverb Ensemble? Or the Cane office fixers? or the Zwei association section 6 who got beaten to death by Gyeong-mi just because he felt like doing so? Or the Liu association section 1 who had to deal with Argalia taking Philip away? Or the Kurokumo clan members when they were attacked by Tanya? You aren't comparing them to either Stephan or Sinclair, right? Not to mention that in her weird and fucked up perception of things, Kromer was less opposed to Sinclair as she was trying to lead him to join her and her cause, even the last things she says before getting killed are her calling him to follow her.
"Both are compared to birds!" Oh, right, because I forgot that a very directed symbolic comparison to a baby bird breaking out of it's shell as a symbol of rebirth, learning about the nuances of the world and self improvement/liberation that is consistently used in the source material Sinclair comes from is exactly the same as one (1) throwaway line the big bad guy uses to mock not only Stephan but the whole Full Stop gang, right. And if you want to say "but Tamaki compares him to a bird once too", yeah she calls him a parrot because he keeps repeating the same complaints over and over, it's still not the same as a consistent metaphor.
"Both are sad blonde twinks! They're essentially the same guy." Sad? Yeah, everyone in the city is sad but their ways to be sad are polar opposites, and neither of them is the pure cinnamon roll uwu crybaby archetype people tend to lump both into, Stephan was merely having a bad day and people decided to make that his whole personality (when honestly we get more insight on his actual personality before Argalia shows up, when he's making sarcastic remarks and getting impatient because they weren't starting killing people fast enough) but he's still perfectly capable (and willing) to murder people, and Sinclair is just... someone who lacks experience about the real world and how it works and has a tendency to get nervous because of this, but he can adapt quickly to situations once he understands them. Blonde? Yeah, but I guess if that's a point to draw a comparison then we should also compare them to Don Quixote, the Tiphereths, Lenny, Yun, Lulu, Olga, every single npc, librarian, and agent who comes with blonde hair from the generator... Twinks? Stephan absolutely isn't one, Sinclair depends on how you define twink as nobody seems to get to an agreement with that, if you define it as merely "young looking thin man with almost no visible body hair" then yeah he is one, but if you go for any more specific definition than that he stops fitting into the definition almost instantly.
In conclusion: if I see anyone else comparing them I'll start blocking people liberally bc I'm sick of seeing that shit (I do that already tbh but just so you know), now scram
#pjm#library of ruina#limbus company#.🔫#this full stop office shit gets serious#probab ly not exhaustive but ive had this sitting on my drafts for way too long so i needed to post it so people understand how much i Hate#that godforsaken comparison
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