Tumgik
#and i go feel really guilty complaining abt this
manicfairydreamboy · 2 years
Text
TW: housing insecurity vent post
I am so so tired of being in not-quite-homeless living situations. And it doesn't feel like I should be upset bc I do have a place to live? But like I'm in a Not Insulated trailer in a backyard and the only heating is a little space heater that keeps shutting off on its own, and once its cold its impossible to heat up above like 50 degrees so thats what I've been waking up to every morning. And it's better than sleeping outside FOR SURE but its still frustrating that my only other options are a couch or my car. I'm employed full time and I still can't afford to live here anymore. I want to get out of this state so badly and it just feels so hopeless, like I'm going to keep ending up in situations like this regardless of where I live for the rest of my life. I'm just so exhausted by even the thought of that.
Slight tangent but like 2 months ago I said it was the most stable and best I've ever been in my life (true at the time) (not so much now. I am doing...... Not Great) and my best friend responded "bestie you are literally homeless". It was funny bc of the sheer bluntness but also its been stuck in the back of my head ever since
0 notes
anaalnathrakhs · 3 months
Text
it's rlly fun how my parents just straight up. do not care. about the disordered eating. we had all this talk back when i went through a big suicidal crisis a couple months ago, i explained what was really difficult for me, eating socially, restaurants, not choosing my food, etc, and now it's like. okay it didn't exist actually.
mother i am not going to order you around, either you accept that i'm gonna have difficulty dealing with "normal people behavior" or whatnot and you stop looking at me like :/ anytime i am anything but ecstatic at the idea of eating anything anytime anyhow, or you adapt your behavior to avoid the results you don't like to see. i'm only doing my best to handle things from my side, and i am certainly not going to try measuring for you how important family social eating occurences are to you.
#''we should talk abt it uwu'' WE TALKED ABOUT IT. STOP COMPLAINING THAT DOING STUFF THAT I CAN'T EASILY HANDLE MAKES ME WEIRD.#EITHER YOU ASSUME IT'S GOING TO MAKE ME WEIRD BECAUSE YOU KNOW EXACTLY HOW AND WHY#OR YOU STOP DOING IT IF IT'S SO UWU HEARTBREAKING UWU FOR YOU TO WATCH#i'm not happy about how guilty i am too of that specific brand of ''oh this is so sad *continues doing nothing*'' form of ''compassion''#they just want me to perform anorexia recovery for them#so they can feel okay we're doing a good job at raising a normal child#they don't give a shit as long as the compusive eating is my mom's meal at the dinner table#just like they didnt care when i had roughly the same problems but not as bad before i had a restrictive phase#i cannot compromise because then WHAT im just hurting my parents for a situation that doesnt make me any happier either?#i do not want to live with them. i do not want to go place or do activities with them.#i dont want to talk to them most of the time and im perfectly willing to handle the times it could be cool to.#but it's really hard to start developping a life of your own when you first of all need like two weeks of total life-reset#quiet at home#and ''at home'' there's your parents who will simply not stop trying to pull you into going random bullshit places#and i can't say no. because the places ARE interesting and time-limited. and it makes them happy. and what am i gonna do anyway?#keep doing nothing on the computer and wait for them to come back to keep doing only the shittiest parts of this unsatisfactory routine?#try to do some work in the house or go out. for them to see that something happened?#i dont know how to live like a normal person#literally not once in my life have i been able to think ''oh i need to do X'' and then just. do X. prepare what's necessary for doing X.#go out and do X. i have to keep stuck at this computer or in this room or with this book.#because there is a million different obstacles to every single thing i'm trying to achieve and half of them are parents-shaped.#everything hurts holy shit#broadcasting my misery#vent#ed tw
3 notes · View notes
pepprs · 1 year
Text
idk how to reconcile my new self with my old self. also i fucking hate waiting. GRAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
#delete later#im getting a taste of my own medicine bc when im overwhelmed depressed etc i don’t even open emails or dms or whatever and then ifeel guilty#and let them build up and run away from them and literally do not reply for years. but ive been waiting for like 5 different but related#replies for 3ish days at this point and im soooooo impatient omg i want to bash my head into the wall.. and afaik no one i messaged has#opened the message despite being active online elsewhere which is EXACTLY what i do so i have no right to complain at all. but still. omggg#i just have a simple question (me and the ps5 voice) reply to my message boy#purrs#also.. ok yeah im gonna be honest about it even if there are consequences lol. idk why im on such a mission to get back all my old#characters but if i don’t i can and will go crazy. i don’t even do that kind of thing anymore and d*viantart is an irreversibly warped#landscape due in part to capitalism and in part to own mistakes and selfish actions. and i truly feel like my tumblr mutuals are the only#ones who understand me and feel safe and cozy on here. but i miss my old internet home. and i really miss my old internet friends and seeing#all the jokes we had and how we were all like interconnected w the same adopt groups and stuff and now we don’t even talk… it makes me so#sad and i feel weird messaging them just for the purpose of asking if they can give me back characters i gave them 4 years ago like a) you j#just don’t do that kind of thing i don’t think but b) it feels so transactional and would make the part of saying hey our friendship was#important to me when i was a teenager and even though we don’t talk anymore i think of you fondly and wish you well. like lollllll. and i#feel cringe even tracking them down / messaging them bc we are all jn our 20s now… embarrassing. but i am so mad at myself for letting those#friendships wither (not that i have the spoons to sustain them these days anyway but still) and for not keeping bettr track of my characters#when i sold them and for giving them up in the first place and for letting my old internet life just fall apart due to neglect bc it puts me#in a bind to try to piece it together again no matter how i try it and i shouldn’t try anyway. but i am so tempted to rn. lol#* itd make saying stuff abt appreciating friendship weird bc there’s a transaction tied in (source: i did this and feel weird and bad)#like the way i want to SCREAM seeing that dA ate all of the journals i made when i was a 14 year old and turned them into glitched polls. th#the way the wayback machine has terrible unreliable records of everything and i can never get some stuff back / track some stuff down. pain#anyways it’s stupid bc i feel cozy and listened to and as connected as i have the energy to be to all of u guys so why am i doing this. but#i miss the dA stuff too and i wish it wasn’t cringe and i wish i could have everything that’s ever been part of me all in one place. lol#also this doesn’t even take into account my poetry community on dA on my other account who i also felt so safe and cozy with and i abandoned#that too and lost touch with basically everyone even though we all knew each others deepest secrets for years.. the heartsickness of it all#anyways mutuals who knew me on deviantart i am clutching both your hands with impassioned urgency and kissing u on the cheeks. that’s all
12 notes · View notes
akippie · 2 years
Text
..
0 notes
shaisuki · 5 days
Note
I saw the ask abt bully!miya twins and bully! suna’s reader talking abt losing weight but what if over summer break she js did it without mentioning it and comes back looking completely different?
you came back looking so different.
the start of a new semester is what they look forward to as the summer gone by since there's no you and you have personal and family obligations and you came back like this.
you lost the weight.
everyone in the school is buzzing how you look. they say you've gotten prettier and fit the image of what expected a manager to look like in a volleyball team. they were the least thrilled about it. considering they're the one who made you feel bad about your weight. they're the one who pokes fun at it in the expense of their entertainment and to your misery.
the team doesn't treat you any different when you came back. the usual training come off and that's when something was odd about you shouldn't you be happy? you were much happier when you're on your body before. you love yourself before you lose the weight and instead your face looks somehow a little sad but it was far from what you really feel.
osamu was the first one to point it out. "ye' lost the weight." he commented and received a smile from you. "yeah. shouldn't you be happy that you can't laugh at my fatness anymore?" the words came bitter from your mouth and 'samu feels a little guilty about it while you continue to pick the stray balls that needed to be placed in the bin.
he remained silent and atsumu is the next one to confront you about it. "so what!? you three always made me feel disgusted on how i look and you complaining about me losing the weight!? go to hell, miya!” you screamed at him. scoffing as you ran away with tears in your eyes. why the hell it was big deal for them when they're always made you feel badthem when they're always made you feel bad about yourself.
atsumu is loss for words. never did he hear you speak to him that way and it made his ego shatter about it and then there's suna. who only reminisce about your plump figure before it was now after getting yelled at earlier. "don't you dare talk about it, suna."
you warned him and he shut up and although you were like that. they understand and they don't want to inflict damage to you anymore and it hurts them to see you restrict your own diet just to maintain your now figure. they like you when you eat whatever you want but there's that ugly comments that wormed all down in the deepest of your heart and somehow they wished in their own stupid way made you feel appreciated before you destroyed yourself.
and now they thought about it when they treated you like worst, regret is always in the end.
323 notes · View notes
rodolfoparras · 6 months
Note
okay i have this issue where my zoloft makes me like… really sweaty for some reason??? just all the time night or day hot or cold. anyways i was just thinking abt reader who has something like that and is always trying to shower before price can tell meanwhile price whi is just Obsessed with how his sweaty bf smells 😩
i want to send more anons but i get nervous… but could i be 🐶 or 🐾 anon?
Pairing: John Price x Male Reader
Cw: 18+, scent kink, somnophilia,
Price would rather be caught dead than to openly admit this but he loves the way you smell.
And while many may say that they feel the same way about their own partners, they probably haven’t gotten hard just from their partner’s sweat and musk. They probably haven’t had their nose buried deep in one of their partner’s dirty gym shirts or worn work uniform while jerking off. They probably haven’t spent hours buried between their partner’s legs because they liked the way their partner’s cologne or lotion smelled.
Yeah Price would rather be caught dead than admit to any of it.
And while a part of him feels guilty for not telling you about it another part of him cant help but find it exciting
You’ll happily let him cuddle up in your embrace after a long day, completely unaware of the thoughts rushing through his head. You don’t say a thing when you notice most of your clothes missing, and you’ll happily let him suck you off, not putting much thought into what’s gotten him so worked up.
But you find out soon enough.
It’s when you get home from work one day, limbs aching, and in need of sleep but before you can do so you desperately need to get under a hot stream.
However Price is adamant on getting you in bed, and while you’d happily stumble into the sheets with him, he had made it clear that he just wants to sleep.
“Let’s just go to bed” he says, wrapping an arm around your waist and gently nudging you over to the bed.
“But I’ll be quick, I promise, give me like 5 minutes,” you insist, not budging an inch.
“Don’t you think I know you kid? You’ll wake up the whole neighborhood by the time you’re done, besides I don’t get what’s the issue here,” Price says while folding his arms across his chest
“The issue is that I stink” you say thinking that will be enough to convince him.
“Not like you’re going anywhere anyways” You raise a brow at his words, and he only mirrors your action in response.
“Fine you win” you say with a roll of your eyes trying your best to hide your smile . “But if I hear any complaining about how I smell I’m kicking you out of bed,”
“Just turn the lights off, will you?” He says with a chuckle before he lays down.
“Yeah yeah” is all you say as you discard your pants and Price takes a second to appreciate the view before the room is engulfed in darkness.
As soon as you lay down in bed he crawls up into your embrace, burying his head in your neck while wrapping his arms around your waist.
Price let’s out a relived sigh.
This is all he’d wanted today, to feel your warm skin press up against him, to hear your heartbeat against his ear and to have your smell engulf his senses.
He feels relaxed, at ease, should be falling asleep but instead he feels his cock twitching in attention
Fuck.
Price’s eyes snap open, cerulean eyes gazing into the darkness, painfully aware of the way blood is pooling to his lower half all of a sudden.
You on the other hand, are dead asleep next to him. He can hear the soft snores escaping your lips.
Price can't blame you. It’s been a long day for you. He too should go to sleep, but instead he’s painfully hard because he can smell you all over him.
How fucking embarrassing.
Price scoffs at himself, tries to pull away from your embrace but just as he tries to do so you tighten your arms around his waist.
Great.
Price exhales, squeezes his eyes shut, tries to scramble his brain for anything that might kill his boner but it’s practically impossible when he’s a hair away from your pit, engulfed in the smell of your cologne and the sweat that’s still sticking to your skin.
On top of that he’s got his hard on firmly pressed up against your very naked thighs.
He can’t think about anything other than about how much he needs you right now.
I really wouldn’t mind if you woke me up during the night or you know, if you didn’t..
The words you had once said to him ring through his head, and for a second he wonders if he should take you up on the offer. I mean you did said you wouldn’t mind it but…
Before he can register what he’s doing, he starts moving his hips, eyes fluttering shut as needy noises start escaping his lips.
It’s disgusting
it’s wrong
He shouldn’t be doing this
But he can’t get himself to stop moving his hips.
Whines and whimpers escape his lips as he continues to rock his hips, head burying deeper in your chest and engulfing himself in your scent completely.
You’re still asleep going by your soft snores and the way you lay lax next to him. Something about the fact that you’re unaware of what he’s doing has goosebumps rising across his skin, and slowly but surely he feels himself inching closer to his release.
“Please,” he croaks out just the way he would if he was riding your cock right now and that’s all it takes before he’s tipping over the edge, coming with a cry and soiling his sweats.
“John?” He hears your sleep coated voice trickle through the dark.
535 notes · View notes
syeren · 6 days
Text
HOW ARE THEY LIKE IN REAL LIFE? — JJK MEN & WOMEN.
SYEREN; mayhaps my 12 AM thoughts… but what if the characters from jjk get plopped down into the real world? whatcha think they might be like?
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Gojo — 五条 悟
in all honesty…
he’s givin frat
LMAOOOOOOOO
or a rich kid with really successful parents who are either a)
architects
or b)
business owners
he also gives me the vibe that if you ask him how rich he actually is, he’ll just respond with
“i’m living comfortably xx 🫶” 😭😭😭
complains about how his body reacts to things like pollen or how his eyes get too dry throughout the day— so, he carries eye drops, lozenges, and those ointments sniffer thingys.
he also gives me the type where he looks not so concerned about maintaining good grades in academics… but he’s just NATURALLY smart
does that make sense?
he’ll just chug energy drinks to pull 3 consecutive all nighters before a final exam, and BOOM… flying colours
decides to opt for his own business and annoys utahime with how much bank he’s making
love language slowly switched from words of affirmation to gift giving, thus showering his friends with lavish gifts
right now at this point in time, he’s just berating all his friends with how much money he has
Geto — 夏油 傑
minus the whole ordeal that happened
he looks the type who would ACTUALLY get his life together 😭😭
occasionally parties, still regularly studies and does his part in group projects
he would go for philanthropy or mayhaps sociology
gojo is his one and only best friend and classmate that he somehow ALWAYS gets stuck with in every class
after graduation, he’s taking a break for himself and is travelling the world
during one of his trips in thailand, he calls up gojo to ask why tf he’s bragging abt his wealth
Nanami — 七海 建人
he’s never escaping the business world i fear LMAOOOOO
he really DOES give business i’m sorry pookie 😞
BUT, his OWN business where he’s his own boss and doesn’t have to work under someone else
he would much prefer that either way
but yeah, working class adult, has a dozen pack of beer or sangria wine in his own personalized wine cellar
often competes with gojo’s business, but decides to make a partnership in the end due to gojo’s persuasion
he’s also stuck in his office currently, looking at his phone in bewilderment to screenshots of gojo’s bank acc that gojo himself sent
Yuji — 虎杖 悠仁
average teenager
he partakes in the track team at his school and likes to exercise ALOTTT
gym buddy in question? todo
i feel like his guilty pleasure is watching mukbangs to torture himself 😭😭
he ends up being megumi’s roommate after a long time of convincing.
he tries to keep his side clean and tidy but it always ends up being an organized mess
right now, he just came back home from the gym with todo and is in choso’s apartment watching a horror series
Yuta — 乙骨 憂太
would you look at that?! average college student
LMAOOOO
definitely majors in either a) science or b) math
NOOOO WAIT
or c) computer science
overall normal kid!
i have no other words, he is also living his life to his fullest, but is very stressed out due to some big projects and tests he has coming
performance anxiety 😞
Megumi — 伏黒 恵
also another average teenager
he’s a bit more toned down tho
lil’ meg over here gives me the vibe that he also knows what he’s doing and is very present in life
he’s on top of his hw, does his chores, has a comfortable room that’s neat enough for him…
he also gives me the vibe that he does NOT GAFFFF !!!!!
protect my own peace 🙏 kind of guy
in college he makes the silent regret of dorming with yuji, the complete OPPOSITE to his own tastes but thats twin 🤞
“yuji, could you take out the trash to the lobby? it’s garbage collection today.”
“what? why me?”
“because i have a meeting through zoom with my classmates”
“then do it after?”
“yuji, my zoom call is two hours, taking out the trash will take around five minutes."
"it's actually a five minute walk down to the lobby, and another five minutes back up... w-wait, why are you holding up your slipper?"
ANYWAYS, he’s havin a good time chilling with his friends 😋
Choso — 脹相
he’s for SURE in a biker club
rides a kawasaki ninja h2r with yuki from time to time
other than that, decided to work after hs and he works in a tattoo shop next door to mechamaru’s pub
big scary big brother vibes compared to golden retriever yuji 😞🙏
currently, he’s lounging in his apartment with yuki, yuji, todo, and megumi
Inumaki — 狗巻 棘
he's too busy spending time with me unfortunately <3
im kidding
maybe not
ANYWAYYYYYYY, i feel like inumaki would have a hobby in pc games.
he would absolutely ROCK valorant
whenever he plays horror games he FORCES the rest of the squad to play with him because he's a pussy scaredy-cat
in his spare time he likes to do track or go on long runs whenever he feels stressed out from uni
forgets to shower sometimes after he runs, so he fucking reeks the day after
he's majoring in comp-sci
speaking of runs, look at him go! he’s on one right now
Sukuna — 両面宿儺
the most annoying and narcissistic man
AND SO MEAN TOO?!
yknow those tiktok comments or ig reel comments you see? yeah, those ones.
that’s him. he’s the one making those actually.
very misogynistic, controlling AND argumentative
he swears on the history of the world wars and somehow always brings it up during conflict? 💀
believes mental health is fake and violence can solve everything
prolly wholeheartedly disagrees with women’s rights with his ancient ass mentality
he’s preparing for an argument stream against mahito 😭
Todo — 東堂 葵
GYMMM RATTTTT
ALWAYS HOGGING THE MACHINES NO MATTER WHATTTT
only talks about fitness and nutrition, girls, and what his plans are for the weekend.
“nah bro, i’m all natty rn,” “i don’t use creatine,” “what?! i’m not on roids dude! just the chicken breast and asparagus with rice”
he’s also the type to look at someone a little too long at the gym, or outside
or anywhere, in fact
studies kinesiology
hope i spelt that right 😁🤞
Mechamaru — 与 幸吉
in my reality, he and miwa would be a couple
THERE I SAID IT!
he would genuinely try to be a good boyfriend while bartending in a dingy pub just two blocks away from their shared apartment.
he would be the type to spam miwa msgs on his break
lowkey wants a tattoo done by choso so he could swipe that discount 😋
Mahito — 真人
he’s known on the internet for being a controversial streamer on twitch
he also has such a shitty mic that when he screams it cuts off the sound
ALWAYS has his shirt off during the stream 😭😭
he would say the most out of pocket statements and without context, it would be the most HORRIFIC thing
so, people would clip that and post it 😟 thus, he gained a large following bc of those statements
Miwa — 三輪 霞
raves about cats and dogs to her bf and after a long, agonizing wait… they finally adopted one from the pound and this is all she has been doing
taking care of her animal child, and man child that is mechamaru
I FEEL LIKE MIWA WOULD ABSOLUTELY LOVE ANIMALS SO THIS IS WHAT SHE DECIDES TO GO FOR IN COLLEGE
with a minor in marine biology too :3
Shoko — 家入 硝子
i would catch her at a pub or a bar somewhere either drinking gin and tonic on lighter day, and more heavier days she would go for whiskey
if NOT, then she’s in an back alley smoking before she needs to go back to her like… 20 hour shift as a nurse.
spends most of her time at home and scrolling on her amazon shopping cart to see what else she can buy to help her busy ass life
Maki — 禪院 真希
similar to todo, but she gives me the vibe that she would train in both calisthenics and mma as a hobby
like hobby: all that stuff, and the other half is dedicated to working towards her degree in either a science like forensics or history.
she lives her life to the fullest on her terms!! really mia from social media and is training real hard everyday
right now, she’s with nobara on a shopping trip to the mall
(she did NOT wanna go, but she likes spending time with her bestie anyway)
Mai — 禪院 真依
FASHION DESIGN I REPEAT FASHION DESIGN
when i first saw mai come on screen, i also did too jus a little bit
but her aura makes me imagine that she runs a tiktok account to post fit pics onto it, has so many pinterest boards dedicated to vintage or her new obsession— office siren outfits.
also has such a GOOD spread of pictures up on instagram, like she’s THAT girl
now, she’s currently studying fashion while scourging the internet for good statement pieces like red leather kitten heels to go along with her two-piece cropped blazer and mini skirt outfit.
Mei Mei — 冥冥
hmm… 😟
teacher vibes…
but like, those english teachers that only interact positively with the popular kids
PLSSS IM SORRY OKAY, THATS THE ONLY FACTOR ABOUT MEI MEI THAT REALLY CAUGHT ME OFF GUARDDDD
APART from that
actually good at her profession, and makes sure her class is fun
the type that does NAWT give two fucks abt late hw bc she complains that “the workload will double up on her anyway”
Utahime — 庵 歌姫
bc of her personality as well as her easily irritated anger tolerance with gojo…
def a head master of a boarding school or an instructor for flight attendants
occasionally goes out for drinks with shoko, but only rants abt gojo bc of his dumbass
very good at her job, and often sees her alumni if she has time in her schedule
right now, she’s currently cooped up in her office filing out different paperwork and silencing her phone from gojo’s numerous screenshots of his bank acc 😭
Nobara — 釘崎 野薔薇
the last of the bunch for average teenagers.
nobara DOES NOT give that much attention towards school, so she opts for a general of easier course— psychology being one, because everyone else is taking it so she thinks it’s easy. two, general studies.
you can find her ALWAYS OUT for some reason?!
she gains her energy by socializing and just being outside of the house in general 😭
says it’s a ‘waste of a day.’
she’s dragging around maki to push clothes into her arms that she deems acceptable and will look amazing on her
AN; SYEREN here! creds to @ kOmuuuug1xxx on x for the pic :3
74 notes · View notes
seraphiism · 10 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
𓆩 ღ 𓆪 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬
( if the road is long, it doesn't matter what you weigh-- i will carry you. )
Tumblr media
chara : neuvillette fandom : genshin impact quote cr : jacqueline woodson a/n : okay i read abt him for a few minutes so let's hope this is in character (。•̀ᴗ-)✧
Tumblr media Tumblr media
one : & THE WEIGHT OF JUSTICE IS A HEAVINESS IN ENDEAVORS, THE SCALES MEANT TO BE TIPPED IN FAVOR OF GOOD IN A WAR WAGED AGAINST EVILS. BUT EVEN IN ONE WITH A SEEMINGLY COLD HEART, THERE IS BURDEN ETCHED IN THE TRACES OF BLUE / OF OCEAN WAVES / OF DIVINITY, AND WHEN THE RAIN POURS, THE WORLD WILL KNOW OF A SORROW UNKNOWN & UNTOLD.
the rain represents many a thing : a hinting of hope, a dreadfulness meant to be endured before the sun rises once more, the coming of bloom in petals unfurled / a possible despair, a grieving in madness, an anguish profound.
there is a sentiment in every droplet that falls and falls, and when you look to the sky, feel the water trail down your face in the gentlest of touches, there is a semblance of grief in the way your lips instinctively curve in the knowing.
you stare at the mourning sky. you close your eyes, inhale deep. exhale. there's an umbrella in your hand, but you do not use it.
and so the rain begins like this : solemn, quiet. fickle -- an announced presence, one so faint that one questions a mere drop here and there, and then the hurting begins, the understanding of the pain one has always carried alone. the rain grows, pours and pours, and then it storms.
another deep breath. you finally look down.
you know this story, you do. the legends once told of a dragon's cry.
you smile again.
still, you do not use your umbrella. you keep walking. there is somewhere to go, someone to be with.
two : & THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD IS A HEAVINESS IN THE HEART, THE BEATING AND BEATING OF A LIFE LONG LIVED GROWN WEARY AND TIRED. BUT EVEN IN THE HAZE OF DAYS GONE BY, THERE IS LOVE ETCHED IN THE TRACES OF FERVOR / OF QUIET COMFORT / OF REVERENCE, AND WHEN THE RAIN POURS, THE DRAGON WILL KNOW OF A SERENITY FOREVERMORE.
"rumor has it," you speak, words filled with repose as you lean against the door frame of a bedroom shared, "that when the dragon cries, the world will hear it, feel it, but they will not understand it."
neuvillette sits on the edge of the bed, his back facing you. you see the way he tenses slightly, and it is almost instinct that he wipes his tears away, ignores the subtle lump in his throat. he does not try to hide it much, not really. and it isn't because he is ashamed-- he's not, because there is not weakness in expressing one's grievances, but to him, it is simply just not necessary. unwarranted, even.
it is not often that he mourns, and truth be told, you think, it is not nearly enough. you take a few steps forward, your clothes slightly damp, the cool air gracing your skin. you find yourself standing before him. he is quick to rise from the bed, brows furrowed ever so slightly in concern at your state. he glances at the umbrella that lays by the door, and he is almost certain you did not use it at all.
"you carried it, yet you chose not to make use of it." he murmurs, and he almost feels guilty. you could get sick-- you're cold to the touch, but you don't shake, don't frown, don't complain. he doesn't understand.
you smile, and there is something so endearing about it that it almost hurts. you wonder if it will begin to storm again. you feel the way his hand cups your cheek ; you lean into the touch, place your hand over his.
"no, i didn't." you answer, and the warmth in your tone makes his heart hurt, somehow. "i never mind the rain, dearest." your smile grows the slightest bit, but so does the ache in his chest. "i know it signifies your pain. you carry everything on your shoulders-- alone, and you always have."
a pause, a brief flicker of reluctance as you choose your words carefully.
"i've always been fond of the rain. not because i know it means you're suffering, but because i know that you can grieve without judgement or reserve. because i know you're letting yourself feel."
then, you hear it-- the revival of rain, the gentle sound of droplets hitting the windowpanes, trailing down and down before collision. there is a storm brewing in the depths of his being, and in the skies, there is one that looms over fontaine. your thumb grazes his cheekbone, wipes another tear away before you press your forehead against his, bring yourself to speak again.
"i won't shy away from it. i won't hide from it. no matter when it rains, no matter where it rains, i'll always come find you. you know that, don't you?"
his other hand finds yours, almost as if by second nature. how gently he squeezes it, and he does so in quiet acknowledgement of your kindness and the love you have always shared. it's a long moment before he responds, and you can tell he's thinking, trying to find all the right things to say. but how do you respond to such ardor? how can you reciprocate something so venerating?
"you are stubborn, love. you'll fall ill."
you let out a soft laugh, almost roll your eyes in exasperation at his reply.
"yes, but it will be worth it. you're always worth it, neuvi."
107 notes · View notes
Note
Ari :(( thinking about suguru again I fear,, when am I not,, thats not the point,, but thinking about you getting an injury maybe breaking an arm or something and he’s so worried. Doesn’t want his baby hurt :(( frets and freaks out like not really freaks out cause I think he’d be calm but he cares. Wants to know how it happened and if you’re in pain. If someone else caused it he’s out to kill. You ask him to sign your cast and he almost sobs. Doesn’t let you lift a finger. He never lets you lift a finger but even more so now. Helps you shower or take a bath and is just so careful. Loves to wash your hair for you. Puts in effort too to learn how you do your hair. Helps you get dressed even if you’re like I can do that >:(( cause he doesn’t want you to overwork yourself. Helps you carry things. If you came to him crying when it happened his poor heart would shatter. Getting a cast to match his eyes :((. He wouldn’t like that you’re hurt but I think he’d like taking care of you more. Like he understands you wanting to do things for yourself and thats why he never pushed before but now he has a reason to push. Complaining about how you look with the cast thinking it makes you look ugly or something and he’s instantly like. Take that back. Take it back. Cause you’re cute always don’t you see? He just wants to nurse you back to health. He loves you so much.
:((((((( REMMMMMM R U GENUINELY OUT TO GET ME WTF ……… this made me so sniffly i love him so bad 💔💔 (this got long also oops)…
no bc rem as literally always we’re holding hands and our brains are syncing …. i can’t tell you how many times i’ve daydreamed abt this exact scenario LIKE IT’S SOOOO PERFECT FOR HIM and you literally described it so well i wanna cry …. there’s fluff potential and there’s angst potential but more than anything it’s just a whole bunch of hurt/comfort and you alr know what that trope does to me 😔😔
but gosh….. he would just be. so so worried and doting :(((((( and he would feel so guilty :(((((((( like no matter how you got the injury i feel like he would blame himself for it. for not being there or not watching over you enough. even if you tell him that it wasn’t his fault…… and then he overcompensates by coddling you even more than usual…… T—T ”doesn’t want his baby hurt” hhhhhh sugu viewing his s/o as his baby specifically makes me lose it like he’s sooo serious abt being your caretaker….. it’s his job to protect you and he failed……. :((( poor baby would beat himself up over it so much 💔💔
frets and freaks out like not really freaks out cause I think he’d be calm but he cares. Wants to know how it happened and if you’re in pain. If someone else caused it he’s out to kill. You ask him to sign your cast and he almost sobs. (…) If you came to him crying when it happened his poor heart would shatter.
☹️☹️☹️☹️ OUR BABYYYYY no bc i think he would absolutely panic but he’d do it silently…. you’re so right rem………. you’re sniffling and trying to explain what happened and he’s trying not to push you but he’s just so so worried and he needs to know what’s going on to feel okay again :((( needs to know what happened so he can figure out how to proceed. bc his chest just feels so tight and he knows it’s not going away until you’re smiling again.. sob.
AND OH BOYYYY if someone else caused it……………. yeahhh he’s out for Blood i fear. even if it was an accident i think he would hold everyone except for you accountable. your friend convinced you to pull a risky stunt? he subtly tries to steer you away from their company (if you stay friends he’s civil but prefers not to interact with them at all/only smiles at them coldly if he has to). you fell while rock climbing bc the safety gear wasn’t tight enough? he’s calling everyone involved just to make sure you get compensated. goes full karen mode honestly like he is speaking to the manager today. the ceo. the Man in Charge. and god forbid if someone like.. directly hurt you…… idk if suguru is the type to beat them up for it (he’s 100% tempted though) but at the very least he’s making sure they never get close to you again. files a restraining order and everything. obviously sues them too. i feel like he would work with law in a no curses au so it just makes sense to me yk??
WAIT ALSO asking him to sign your cast :(((( that’s so CUTE and him almost sobbing….. rem……. i love him so much my heart hurts. you ask him to do it all smiley and happy and he gives you a smile in return but it’s just a little wobbly. writes his signature while you’re all :33 but then you look up and his eyes are glassy…. and if you point it out he just sniffles and apologizes…… 🥺🥺🥺 he’s a baby. our baby.
Doesn’t let you lift a finger. He never lets you lift a finger but even more so now. Helps you shower or take a bath and is just so careful. Loves to wash your hair for you. Puts in effort too to learn how you do your hair. Helps you get dressed even if you’re like I can do that >:(( cause he doesn’t want you to overwork yourself.
T—T remmmm….. you’re gonna be the death of me i swear like these hcs are all SO cute. he’s the only Man ever. ohhh he would be so so gentle like it’s actually insane :(((( cradles you in the bath….. smiles when you get all relaxed and sleepy but then he glances down at your arm again and goes all :c bc he just hates this so much. not taking care of you but just. knowing that you’re in pain….. i think he feels very intense physical discomfort so he just tries not to think about it and puts his all into tending to you instead. wraps you up in a fluffy towel and dries your hair and clothes you in his big cozy hoodie.
i think it could get a little frustrating bc he really would straight up baby you. which i would eat up personally but it’d also be a little overwhelming. he doesn’t give you much of a choice though bc he’s so intent on making his baby feel better :((
aaaa now i’m just imagining you getting a little hissy at him…. bc he’s coddling you to the point where maybe you feel a little disrespected? like he just insists on feeding you or whatever and it’s cute at first but then it’s like…. i have hands. but anyway i think it would break his heart if you got mad at him :((( he doesn’t want to make you feel incompetent but if he’s not taking care of you constantly he feels a little like his heart is about to burst….. sigh. i just feel like this would be hurt/comfort from both sides tbh 💔
He wouldn’t like that you’re hurt but I think he’d like taking care of you more. Like he understands you wanting to do things for yourself and thats why he never pushed before but now he has a reason to push.
AAAA AND THIS!!!!!! SOOOO TRUE SO REAL he’d definitely feel guilty and he’d hate seeing you hurt but i agree….. he would absolutely love a chance to pamper you. once he gets over the initial shock and panic and discomfort and you’re feeling better i think he’s almost kinda smug abt it . bc now he has an excuse to carry you around and help you with putting on your shoes and … idk i think he would just feel so useful and needed. he feels guilty abt being pleased bc you’re in pain :(( but like… a part of him is for sure jumping with joy at the chance to spoil you the way he wants to.
Complaining about how you look with the cast thinking it makes you look ugly or something and he’s instantly like. Take that back. Take it back. Cause you’re cute always don’t you see? He just wants to nurse you back to health. He loves you so much.
😥😥😥😥😥😥 i cried real tears. i know i’m just picking out literally every single part of your ask atp but it rlly did make me insane ok ……. ”take that back. take it back.” I SCREAMEDDD YOU GET HIM LIKE NO ONE ELSE DID YOU KNOW THAT…… he’s SO genuinely offended on your behalf he’s like how DARE you say that about my baby >:(( and it’s like. suguru i AM your baby. but he doesn’t care at all he refuses to hear you out. just reassuring all around!!! ”cause you’re cute always don’t you see?” T—T he loves you so fervently… you’re the cutest person in the world to him….. he’s so Good. sigh.
so anyways this did something to me tysm for the food rem my dearest <333 gonna daydream abt this forever and ever you’re so sweet for sharing this with me it’s like we’re having a sugu meal together :33 i love hurt/comfort w him more than anything else on the planet hhhhh….
24 notes · View notes
cottoncandyloverrrr · 8 months
Text
My first piece of writing will be based off of one of @bountycancelled ‘s posts. It will be a multi part series bcuz 1. I hate one shots 2. I can’t write long fan fictions yet. Idk how many parts but prob 3 parts at most. I only like to write 1k words max.
Word count: 347
Warnings: none, Sanji simping but that’s nothing to be warned abt. Blood. Spoilers for anyone who isn’t at or past ep. 48(I think)
Pairing: none really, Sanji x y/n, Sanji x reader i guess.
You were wearing slightly more revealing clothes compared to your usual coverage in outfits. You have quite a cutesy style of clothing. Sanji is giving you many compliments as you shop from the multiple stores. After some time Sanji is carrying several bags, which leaves you feeling guilty.
“Sanji, I can carry some of the bags” you offer as you both continue walking down the streets.
“I can carry these bags just fine love” he slightly flirts while reassuring that he doesn’t need your help. You both continue walking until a man tries hitting on you. You politely decline his date offer. When he doesn’t leave you alone both you and Sanji grow more annoyed at this man. You were preparing yourself to fight him. Before Sanji could even think about lifting his leg to kick the man, you had the man on the floor with a broken nose and blood everywhere. Sanji was shocked but it only made him fall deeper in love. You were complaining about how hard it was going to be to remove the blood stains you’d gotten
“My shirt! This will be so difficult to remove blood from!” You complain, your pastel blue shirt is covered in blood splatters. You readjust the bow in your hair.
“I can clean your shirt for you!” Sanji offers, you want to decline but he won’t take no for an answer.
You both begin heading back to The Going Merry. Sanji carefully sets your shopping bags down in the girls cabin. He asks for your shirt so he can clean it “I can clean your shirt now y/n!” He won’t em accept ‘no’ as answer. So after he leaves the cabin you change your shirt and give the stained one to Sanji “Thank you y/n! I’ll have your shirt super clean!”
The end? (Maybe)
Sorry I don’t know what else to add. I might make another part if I can figure out what to add.
33 notes · View notes
honeybunniii333 · 4 months
Note
GENO ANGST :00 ( or geno and Edward fluff, whatever you choose )
I had an idea of geno having a panic attack in class but I wanna see what you would write abt him.
(YESSS, I love them so much. It's a crime that there isn't more for them! Siblings dynamics are a soft spot for me. ♡)
To say Edward was feeling guilty would be an understatement. He had committed the awfullest of awful things. He'd made his baby brother cry, and oh boy, was it eating him alive. Sure, he teased Geno like any other older sibling, but he truly adored the little brat, and genuinely hurting his brothers' feelings was something the jock would NEVER do on purpose. He was stressed out majorly, which was NOT an excuse, but still. Everything had been so chaotic. James was acting off. He had a big test to study for, Isaac was being isaac. So many supernatural related things had been happening, and don't even get him started on Felix and his shit! Ed was beyond overstimulated at the moment. He'd snapped, and he'd shouted at the boy. Which was something Ed never did. Ed yelled a lot, but never at Geno. He prided himself on his immense patience when it came to the little rascal... but he'd broken that streak... and over the stupidest of things, Geno had just wanted to play with him...
"Geno, I don't have time..." he'd warned in a tone that usually got the message across that he was too stressed or upset to talk. But the kid had pushed further, clearly desperate for his attention. "You never have time! Come on, just a game or two! I'm bored!!" he'd complained in that whiny voice Ed usually found annoyingly endearing but at that moment had made him want to rip his hair out. Everything had made him want to rip his hair out. The sound of faint construction happening down the street and the soft whirl of his fan were too loud for him. The feeling of his shirt against his skin made him want to set himself on fire, and the room had been too bright even with just the sun from the window to light it. He just couldn't handle it right then, but words had never been his strong suit, ESPECIALLY in moments like then. "Geno..." he'd warned again. "Come on, come on, come onnnnnn-"
"STOP! GOD FUCKING STOP!" He'd slammed his hand down on his desk as he'd glared daggers at the other. "GO AWAY! LEAVE ME ALONE! WHAT PART OF THAT DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND!? YOU ARE SUCH A PEST!" He'd shouted. Geno had looked astonished for a moment. His eyes were wide, and jaw slacked before his little mouth started to quiver, and his eyes started filling with tears. Ed had been so overwhelmed that all he'd been able to do was turn the away again in his seat, close his eyes and press his palms into them as he tried desperately to tune everything out around him. It wasn't until he'd finally managed to get his bearings that he'd really realized how harsh he'd been. And now he'd been sitting by the younger boys' door, trying to figure out how to express how bad he felt. Geno was still sniffling, and the noise wasn't helping him at all... He knew he was just stalling because he didn't want to see the red tear stained face his brother always had after crying.. but he also knew nothing would be resolved if he stayed there. So... he forced himself up and knocked as he peeked his head in. "Geno... can we talk, please?"
The kid was curled up under his blankets. The superhero patterned comforter, shielding his tiny body from the other. Ed knew the feeling of faint relief at not having to see the hurt he'd caused was selfish, but it was there regardless. "...ok.." his voice was crackly from crying, and Ed forced himself forward once again, moving to seat himself at the end of the bed to give the other space if he wanted it. He was silent for a moment before taking a deep breath in and letting it out to steel his nerves. "...I'm sorry I yelled at you." he started,"I shouldn't have done that, we don't yell at each other, and that wasn't okay."
He watched the lump of blanket shift before half of genos face peeked out. "... why did you yell at me?" He asked cautiously, he didn't understand. He pestered his big brother like that all the time, and it never triggered such a harsh reaction. At the worst, he'd be gently booted out of his room and banished to the hallway... Edward didn't know how to explain it. He didn't know why he got so overwhelmed sometimes... he just did. But he'd made a vow to himself that when his baby brother asked him a question, Ed would answer it. He wouldn't sugar coat it or dance around it. He'd always tell him the truth in as age appropriate language as possible. Because Geno was smart and he needed to know things. "...I was overwhelmed." he answered, fiddling with the hem of his shirt as he fished for words. "I've been... really stressed lately. There's a lot of stuff happening right now, and I've been pushing through it fine.. but I guess today... I just can't." he admitted running a hand through his own hair as he heard Geno shuffling again. He'd come out of his hiding spot, his knees hugged to his chest. "Is that why you're never home, cause of the stuff?" He asked.
"Yeah... cause of the stuff..." Ed mumbled back. "I'm sorry too..." Geno whispered his voice quiet as he wiped at his eyes. "What for?" Ed raised an eyebrow. "For pushing when I knew you were busy. I know you're in high school, and you have a lot of stuff to do.. but I miss you... you're always busy now... you never have time to play anymore." he admitted. Ed hadn't thought about that... how he'd been home less and less, and brushing geno off more and more. He always tried to make time to play with Geno, at least on weekends, if anything... but he'd not been doing a very good job at that lately. "I..." his attention shot back to his little brother again at the sound of the boy's voice cracking. "I'm not a..actually a pest, am i?" he croaked out, trying to wipe away the tears that spilled once more.
Edward's face twisted into a frown, shushing the other gently as he scooped him up and moved to sit with him in his lap, his arms wrapped tight around his poor baby brother. "Shhh..sh sh sh... of course not Genie... you're my little buddy, I love having you around..." he insisted, "I...I'm sorry I haven't been home much, I'll...try and cut back on some stuff, okay? I think I need it..." he spoke softly and let out a sigh. They sat in silence for a long time. Genos tears turning to faint sniffles as his brother rubbed his back. "You wanted to play that new game you got, right?" Ed voice broke the silence. "Yeah..." he mumbled, moving around a little to look up at the older. "Wanna play a couple rounds?" relief flooded Ed at the way Genos face immediately lighted up. "Yeah!"
He couldn't help but giggle at the enthusiasm as he was quickly yanked up off the bed and tugged towards the door "Okay okay I'm comin, relax." he snorted, His little brother could be a pain sometimes, but it was a pain Edward couldn't possibly live without.
14 notes · View notes
werebutch · 2 months
Text
Guy who is annoying and weird. Chill outttttbruh
Seriously though I’m so tired of having to wait on everyone in my family there are days where I have to wait hours in the car doing nothing because I live too far from everything so I can’t go home or I never know when they’ll be done doing whatever so I can’t exactly do anything else. At school I have to wait for my sister for at least 2 hours and yes I can do homework but god. Still. And yes I do do other shit during that but there’s only so much I can do out. Then I have to go home, sometimes shop beforehand (which I usually do while waiting but still..), cook dinner, spend a sympathy hour or 2 with my dad or he’ll kill himself, THEN I have time to do my own stuff like clean up bunnies + room + do homework + fun stuff. That’s usually only 3 hours before I go to bed. It fluctuates obviously. I know I’m being really stupid bc I have it pretty good I have a real house where I don’t have to pay rent and shit but I’m still gonna complain a little. It was way worse last year when my other sister was in hs but my family literally can’t function without me doing this stuff. I have to keep track of all appointments and school stuff for them too. They keep me so busy that I can’t work. Like my dad will beg me not to work because if I do he will have to get off his ass. Cause I can’t possible do everything. When my summer job rolls around he calls me evil and selfish for working it but if I don’t I’m even more broke the rest of the year. But at least I’m not as busy since there’s no school. It’s just such stupid stuff right now I can’t wait until I save up to move out 😭 and I have to do all this shit while they’re all telling me that I make their life worse etc etc like wtaf ? Am I insane like am I just so spoiled that I’m making up problems for myself or are they real. Because I genuinely can’t tell. It used to be so much worse it’s insane that I’m still not happy LMAO. So I hate complaining about it on here but I also need to get it out SOMEWHERE. Ugh
I hate seeming like I’m fishing for validation or sympathy bc I’m not I just need to talk somewhere.. I feel so crazy guilty having people tell me that I’m ok for thinking this. So don’t 😭😭 even if it’s really sweet. I appreciate it a lot but idk. It’s like okay well how would you know..you know. Like what if I’m unknowingly twisting my story to seem worse or something and I’m actually just spoiled and looking for smth to complain abt. Idk
5 notes · View notes
slaythespire · 2 months
Text
im sorry my tumblr followers who dont know me im mad rn, im just rambling mad under a readmore again thanksss
listen its not that i need to be dating someone im just chilling. in fact rn i would not want to date anyone.
but i HATEEEE HATE seeing people say shit like "You dont need anyone, you should learn to be happy without someone else in ur life! why do you need someone else! just be happy without that!" well damn sue me for wanting someone to deeply love me who i deeply love back!! why is that such a bad thing to want!! obviously if you cant function without being in a relationship that's not good, but people always say that shit to someone going "i feel unlovable and like no one will ever want me" and it feels so meanspirted!! damn!!
its been like almost a year since i got ghosted and i know its annoying to hear people complain abt the same thing over and over again. but its just HARD bcus i feel stupid, and used. i really thought my ex was like, THE person, we talked abt getting married and how we'd combine our last names, abt moving in together, supported each other through everything. when i was in inpatient this person called me almost everyday i was there to say hi and check in on me. i thought my future involved them and then they just dropped me without even an explanation. never in a million billion years did i think that would happen (outside of my bad brain telling me it would, which, well i was right so LOL) bcus they were my best friend of 8 years!!
and its scary bcus it makes me think there must be something wrong with me/"how could anyone ever love me when even the person who dated me for 6 years didnt". and people always say things like "you haven't met everyone who will care about you yet" but what if i have, and my one chance at having a relationship i was so happy in was ruined bcus the other person is a self-obsessed asshole who lied to my face abt so much for who KNOWS what reason. WHATEVER.
i feel like when i make posts like this i come off as an insane person in the "no wonder they broke up with you" way, but i promise im actually normal ive just been very emotionally ripped to shreds by a very bad breakup. barely a breakup bcus it was over TWITTER DM. whatever im just gonna be one of those people that obsesses over fictional characters so much i think were in a relationship.
i just rlly rlly wonder what their reasoning for doing this to me was and if they feel bad abt it. or if they think its funny, or if they just dont care. i also wonder if they think they can just message me one day and apologize and think itll be okay (i dont think this will happen, i used to but i dont anymore)
i lean towards they just dont care, i doubt they even think about what they did lol. i mean i HOPE they feel bad, but i dont think thats true. id be shocked if i ever heard from them again which is just, crazy. 8 years of knowing someone and it ends like that through no fault of your own. i wish i had a screenshot of the break up dm id post it in a heartbeat so anyone who actually read this far would feel whiplash like i do. (filled to the brim with "i love you so much" "i feel horrible for hurting you and i hate that im doing it" "i really care about you" "i hope you stay in my life bcus youre my best friend").
and it makes me really sad bcus OFC we would have stayed friends, i loved them so much that while id be sad abt breaking up i would still want them in my life. (WE EVEN TALKED ABT HOW IF WE BROKE UP WE ALWAYS THOUGHT WE'D STAY FRIENDS). but even in my fantasy world where they reach out after a few years all apologetic and guilty i just couldnt do it anymore.
one more but i don't understand what would compel someone to say all that knowing theyre lying and dont give a fuck about you, like it only comes off as evil and fucked up and cruel to me, so how else am i supposed to take that.
5 notes · View notes
nanathott · 7 days
Note
okay, I'm the one I asked for advice. this is a bit long so take your time.
first I must give you some context. i’ve always been a person who has a hard time interacting with people, especially making friends because i’m very introverted and quite shy and people usually think i’m scary bcs of my looks. that's why when i was a kid i didn't really have friends (just a few but weren't really close and i always felt out of place around them), but that was okay because i always had my sister who was a year younger than me who was like my best friend. even so with adolescence that changed and as we developed our tastes and personalities we began to distance ourselves, so i lost my best friend </3 and so i had to start looking for friends, which was extremely difficult because i had no experience.
but anyway, despite that in high school i managed to make friends, which made me very happy. and it was always fine, they’re very good people and i appreciated them a lot, especially for being my only friends.
the problem began abt three months ago when i met two new girls who are my classmates and we quickly became friends, which left me somewhat confused because again, it had always been difficult for me to make friends and it even took me a few years to get used to and even feel comfortable around my old friends. this, because (and this is another reason why i find it difficult to have any kind of relationship) i’m too cautious and distrustful of people, afraid that they might hurt me or abandon me (due to family traumas lol).
despite this, my two new friends made me feel comfortable super quickly and managed to break down all my barriers effortlessly. for example, i hate physical contact (or at least that's what i always thought, since it always made me uncomfortable, except coming from my little brother who has always been bit clingy) but with my new friends it's different and in fact i feel touch starved and the NEED to always touch them, whether in hugs, playing with their hands, resting my head on their shoulder, etc. things i never got to do with my old friends who i've known longer. i also feel that i don't have to restrict myself with the things i want to say and we share many more things in common than with my old friends with whom i used to differ a lot
i also feel that with my new friends i’m a little more adventurous, since lately i’ve been trying new things that i’d never have dared to do before and trying to enjoy life in different ways.
anyway, the thing is that my old friends feel a little insecure about these new friends of mine, even more so when i see them every day since we share classes unlike my old friends. and they always “jokingly” claim that i’m replacing them since i'm spending too much time with my new friends, even going out with them outside of class, which makes me feel guilty. but at the same time, my old friends (and this has always been a problem(?) in the friendship) never have time to go out, whether for classes, work or other activities, since high school we’ve always had difficulty meeting up and stuff. and with these girls we have similar schedules, so it is easier to spend time together but it results in insecurities for my old friends, even though they always reject or cancel plans with me (something that i always took as normal and never complained about bc i know it's difficult to balance responsibilities and social life)
even so, whenever i spend time with my new friends i think about my old ones and feel guilty.
the important thing is that yesterday i was organizing plans with my two friends for today when my old friends texted me to go out in the same day and for a moment i didn't know what to do, because i didn't want to cancel my plans but i didn't want to tell them that i already had plans and reject them bc i'm afraid i might make them feel bad. and in the end, i decided not to cancel my plans and reject my old friends because the thought of hanging out with them gave me a funny feeling in my gut (and i don't usually ignore those signs) which never happened to me before, and again, they made jokes about me preferring my new friends over them and that kinda stuff that made me feel bad about my decision.
and i really love all my friends but i don't feel good about the situation. i'm afraid that i'm doing something wrong or hurting someone but at the same time i don't know what to do because i can't and i don't want to stop spending time with my new friends bc i really like being around them but i don't want to leave aside the old ones either, even though the way they’re behaving does bother me a little and i think it's a little unfair they're getting upset (bcs I know those jokes aren't really jokes) with me for spending time with other ppl when they never have the time to make plans with me, which i'm not complaining about but it seems unfair on their part. but idk, maybe i'm wrong? i don't have much experience with friendships so i'm not sure.
but to close the topic, a couple of hours ago one of my old friends sent me several messages which i didn't get to read because she later deleted them all before i even realized she texted me, and i'm afraid to ask what they said, but i guess if she deleted them maybe they weren't a good thing? idk.
whatever, do you have any advice, nana? or what's your opinion on the matter? i'm really lost.
hmm… well i would follow your gut, u said you had a feeling when they asked you to hangout with them and u know urself best
i’ve always been the kinda person who just accepts fallouts with people so it’s hard to say what to do here, but people grow out of friendships, it happens
esp if your old friends aren’t making the effort to hangout with you much and always cancel plans, i’d follow your gut, but i do think you should talk to your old friends
this could be a situation that could be solved with communication so i would message them and let them know how you’ve been feeling
6 notes · View notes
ace-ace-attorneys · 2 years
Note
what are your favorite headcanons for 7 year gap phoenix? (i am such a sucker for beanix hehe as you can probably already tell <3)
i may have guessed from the profile pic alone if nothing else ;)
so! beanix thoughts incoming (warning for being disorganized and messy ahah):
- i think that he and Miles had already been in a relationship for a few months when Phoenix got disbarred. Miles tried incredibly hard to support him and be there for him, but instead of relying on him Phoenix just got more and more withdrawn. eventually they broke up, although it was more of a mutual separation where they both knew they'd end up back together eventually
- Miles was torn because on one hand he felt like Phoenix was pushing him away because he was depressed, and he didn’t want to let that happen, not when Phoenix had been there for him at his darkest times. But at the same time he wanted to respect Phoenix’s wishes and understood that Phoenix needed some time to figure out who he was, a) without his badge, and b) without Miles, having built his identity around those things for so long.
- So they separate for a while and Miles does his best to give Phoenix space although he does check in on him and Trucy periodically to make sure they’re okay. and when they do get back together Phoenix is in a better place and they're both just all around more ready for a serious relationship
- Trucy is the #1 thing that keeps Phoenix going, especially at first- not just because he has an obligation to care for her, but just her herself. she drags him out on walks and invites people over and reminds him to take his meds every day and helps him cook dinner and does so many things that made life more bearable for him
- and for a while he feels guilty about letting his little daughter take care of him, but eventually he realizes that this is her way of showing her gratitude for how he'd taken care of her and trying to do the same for him the best way she knows how. they take care of each other <3
- i am so absolutely torn between “the ‘grape juice’ was actually alcohol and he struggled a bit with alcoholism during the 7yg” and “no it was actually just grape juice the man really does love grape juice”. i cannot decide which one i like better because i think both are great takes for different reasons
-he hangs out with Maya on the weekends and they mostly sit around in their sweatpants complaining and gossiping and eating junk food. a couple times she dragged him out to a bar to do karaoke. she also jumps at every opportunity she gets to babysit Trucy
-i don't think he was ever in the best of physical shape but he definitely gains a significant amount of weight during the 7yg. it's not really a big deal to him but he does get a little self-conscious abt it when he thinks about how the people who knew him before must think he really let himself go. maya, who has always been on the chubbier side, points out to him that chubbier people are softer to hug. trucy concurs. as silly as it sounds, it makes him feel a lot better
-he and Trucy have a bunch of silly little family routines/inside jokes/things that only the two of them know about. they play a game every night and they do best 2 out of 3 rock paper scissors to determine who gets to pick. when they go for a walk the first person to spot a wild animal gets to choose what they have for dessert that night. every year for Christmas Trucy buys him the weirdest pair of socks she can find, and he buys her the most outlandish hat he can find and they both have to wear them the next day. every time they leave the house they race to see who can get their shoes on and be ready first. they play the floor is lava. once a month they stay up all night watching horror movies and eating ice cream directly out of the tub.
-at first the piano thing is very much just a cover for Phoenix's real job at the club but he figures he should learn just enough to be believable, and in the process he discovers it's actually pretty fun and kind of meditative, and starts trying to learn for real. Trucy joins in and is immediately way better than he is. (he's a little put out by this but she cheekily promises to give him pointers)
107 notes · View notes
temptresstitania · 16 days
Note
I've wanted to anon for a long time but. your writing getting me fucking. blushing and looking away all flustered combined with being maybe the hottest motherfucker alive is a deadly one
but here goes
I just remember all your posts about. blushy shy pervert dykes who get off on being pushed around and bullied and. fuck if the thought of being one of those for you doesn't make me fucking. insane
I love the shame I love. liking fucked up things and not being able to admit it and when I finally do getting. talked down and made fun of for it as it's being done to me so. I'm in this haze of shame and guilt as my stupid cunt is leaking and. fuck
and then you can notice how fucked out and cockdrunk I look and. make fun of that too and just. just this thick sludge in my gut that makes me cum so fucking hard more than anything else
and I'd keep. I'd keep being sheepish and blushy around you even more so and. and I'd whine so pretty for you as you fuck me and make fun of me and.
fuck
and take pictures of me and write on me and make me wear things I wouldn't normally and. make me admit my fantasies and make fun of me for them and. make me do risky things because you know the chance of me getting caught just. just makes me go fucking crazy
and despite all that I still fucking. my knees still buckle and I'd still hump your boot so desperately just begging to cum even if you didn't ask me to I just. assume I need permission and the fucked up whine in my voice tells you the act of asking gets me off too
and just. fuck
love the blog <3
i keep rereading this ask. there's something so arousing abt how confessional it is, how much you're revealing to me.
i'd want to know more.
i'd love to push and goad someone like you into divulging all of those depraved little secret fantasy and ideas, force them to read aloud posts they've liked about the fetishes and kinks they tried to keep hidden. maybe I'd even lie at first, telling them it was "okay" to tell me, that i wouldn't say anything, i wouldn't think of them differently, i wouldn't laugh, i swear!
and then, when i have them on camera, admitting all the things they think about and get off to, i'll giggle and call them names and tell them what to say. they'd repeat after me and call themself those same insults, looking all guilty and sheepish.
the image of some subservient pervert frantically grinding their cunt into my boot, pathetically pleading for release just seems so nice...i really like that thought. i might be nice and let that pervert cum, but i would make them feel as if they'd never get the chance. i'd complain that i couldn't quite hear them, or that they were being too impolite, or that they keep asking me this same question over and over, and that it was annoying me. but eventually I'd let them make their mess, and belittle them again for it.
maybe i'll even have them clean up the mess they made?
6 notes · View notes