#and i dont even. know who to tell that I'd have to leave early i don't know the protocol | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

felixsramen · 1 year

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When i saw the part where y/n said that she was an introvert and loves reading i was in tears really i wanna thank this person that she reqested that!

So i wanna ask if you could do maybe a oneshot where y/n has a really down day couldnt sleep and when it was morning she was out for groceries and the members were at work and when they came home they saw y/n lying on the couch sleeping but with a book in their hand and the members realize how much y/n was struggling lately and they do something to help her getting better maybe? If thats okay for you i mean you dont habe to but i would really love that

I really liked this ask. Im sorry it's a little short though.

It was probably about 4am now. You were awake on the giant bed that your boyfriends had decided to buy so you all could sleep together. You were currently in-between Changbin and I.N. It was raining at this point and the rain matched your mood. You couldn't sleep after being stressed from work and getting that promotion that had you working later. Instead you climb out of the bed and make your way to the living room.

It hadn't been even a week of getting that promotion. You go to the blinds and open them all the way. You watch as another flash of lightning brightened the sky. You couldn't help but sit on the couch by the window looking out it.

The rain splattered across the sky and you watch as the leaves and tiny branches from the tree in the front yard come down. You couldn't help but cry. You had been yelled at yesterday by your boss for the stack of papers that she had gave you earlier in the week, when she had given you the promotion, hadn't all been filled out by yesterday.

Luckily she didn't force you to do another day of work and told you she expected it done when you returned. It didn't make you feel any better though knowing this was just the first week. It didn't help that your boyfriends were busy working and getting ready for their comeback. So they were staying late practicing and would come home tired and just ready to eat and rest. It didn't bother you much but you were starting to miss spending time with them.

You were sobbing at this point as the droplets hit your window covering it up. Eventually the tears dried and so did the rain but the clouds were still grey. You had stayed up all night and into the morning.

You hear the door open. The light turns on and you see Seungmin who has bed hair. He yawns and stretches. "What are you doing in here this early?" He asks you in his morning voice.

"Couldn't sleep." You tell him and he makes his way to the couch. He goes up to you and climbs onto the couch cuddling into you. Your hand goes to his hair and he sighs.

"They'll be getting up in a few minutes. I have to get ready for work too." He says yawning again. Your nails go into his hair and scratch his scalp and he sighs with content.

He slowly pulls away from you reluctantly. He goes into the room again probably to get the rest of the boys up. Within 30 minutes the house is full with your 8 boyfriends.

"Fucking hell. It's too early for this." Jisung whines onto Hyunjin who is half asleep but ready to go on the other couch.

Your other 6 boyfriends make their way to the living room. "I really don't want to go. Sometimes I wish I had decided to do literally anything else that doesn't involve me waking up at the ass crack of dawn." Minho grumbles as he grabs the keys.

Chan nods eyes heavy as he takes a sip of his coffee. "I'm so tired." Jisung whines again.

"Lets go. They said they'd let us leave work early and then we'll have a couple days off after." Chan says taking another sip of the coffee he made.

The boys file out of the house waving at you and telling you they love you. Changbin sighs. "We'll be back around 1." He says bag on his shoulder.

"I'd appreciate it if you went shopping today. I left money on the nightstand." Minho says yawning and you nod your head.

"I love you." He says and you return it. He sighs as he closes the door behind him. You let out your own sigh.

You weren't feeling much better. You instead went on your phone scrolling through for the next few hours before you decide to go to the grocery store.

You don't feel good about yourself so you throw on a pair of sweatpants and one of Felixs hoodie, opting on going for a more lazy look. Who cared anyways? It was just the grocery store. You grab the money that sat on the nightstand and you put it in your wallet and grab your purse shoving it inside.

It didn't take you long getting in the car and going to the store. Luckily Minho had made a list of things that you needed to get. You were quick to find them knowing you couldn't stand being out in public at the moment. You checked the list once again making sure you had gotten everything.

Your phone buzzes. "Also me and Bin need protein shakes for working out. Love you and thank you!" A message from Chan reads. You try your best not to make a face at the mention of the protein shakes Chan and Changbin would chug. You sigh but go towards that aisle.

You quickly grab it and check out. You were glad the house wasn't too far. You got home and put the groceries up quickly and it was around noon. You wondered if the boys kept your book out that you had currently been reading or if Minho had put it up with the rest of your books.

You go to the drawer occupying the room and open it finding your book. Luckily the bookmark was in it still. Jisung had a habit of picking your book up wrong and the bookmark falling out of it. You grab the book shutting the drawer. You make your way to the hall closet grabbing an extra blanket from there and making your place on the couch.

You had gotten halfway through the book before your eyes started getting heavy. Not being able to sleep last night must've taken a toll on you because before long your eyes give up on you.

The boys pull up to the house getting out. "Why did we have to be there so long today? I thought we were getting out at 3." He complains as he grabs his bag.

"We would've left around 1 if you spent more time practicing than complaining about doing it." Hyunjin says glaring at his boyfriend.

"It was hard and we were there all dayyyy." Jisung says dragging out his last word.

Minho raises an eyebrow at his boyfriend. "You literally got it in like 20 minutes after you stopped complaining." He says as Chan grabs the keys from his pocket.

"So you're saying it's all my fault?" He says pouting.

"No it's not Ji. You weren't the only one complaining instead of practicing we all were." Changbin says as Chan unlocks the door letting them inside.

"Y/N!!!!" Jisung yells out for you ready to jump on you and smother you with love. Instead he sees you on the couch with a blanket and one of your books laying on you.

He comes up to you and the boys follow behind. Usually you'd be up doing stuff around the house to keep you busy while your boyfriends were gone on your off days.

"She's asleep." Jisung says to his boyfriends.

"We can see that Ji." Hyunjin says to him. Jisung glares at his boyfriend.

"You know what I meant." Jisung says looking back at you.

"I don't think she slept at all last night." Seungmin says speaking up to his boyfriends. They look at him confused.

He sighs. "I got up before you guys and I didn't see her so of course I went looking for her. I saw her looking out the window on the couch. So I went up to her and asked what she was doing up so early. She told me she couldn't sleep." Seungmin says to his boyfriends and they look at you concerned.

"I woke up at one point and noticed she wasn't in bed but I didn't think much of it at the time. I was too tired." Felix says to his boyfriends.

"How long has she been like this?" Changbin asks no one in particular.

"I think we should be concerned Chan." I.N. says and he nods.

"I don't think any of us realized how much she's going through especially with the new promotion." Minho says sighing.

Chan nods once again. Minho grabs the book and places the book mark in it. He sighs watching you.

"Should we wake her?" Hyunjin asks his boyfriends. Chan shakes his head.

"Not yet." Minho says agreeing with Chan.

"We should at least take her to the room." Felix says and they nod. Changbin scoops you up into his arms careful to not wake you up taking you in the room and laying you down.

Jisung and I.N. climb in bed too pressing their bodies against you. You cuddle into I.N.s chest who stays still. "Since we have the next few days off I think we should come up with days we each try and spend with her." Chan says and the boys agree.

"Me, Hyunjin, and Innie were going to go to the new little coffee shop tomorrow. We were planning on inviting her too." Seungmin says replying to his boyfriend.

"Okay good. For the next few days we're off let's all invite her to go with us wherever we go." Changbin says watching you.

You slowly open your eyes to being cuddled behind and in front of you. "Hey love. How'd you sleep?" Jisung asks from behind you.

"Better." You say sighing and rubbing your eyes. You try to sit up but I.N. and Jisung keep you in place.

"Did you sleep last night?" Changbin asks you concerned. They finally let you go so you can look at your other boyfriends. They all have concerned looks on their faces as you sigh.

"No." You say admitting it and Chan comes up beside I.N. and sits on the edge of the bed.

"Are you guys upset at me?" You ask them. You quickly get all 8 boys shaking their heads.

"Not at all we're just worried about you that's it." Minho tells you and you want to break into tears at their words.

You can't help but bite your lip to try and stop the tears. Chan sighs seeing you do that with a sad smile on his face. "What did I tell you about that?" He says hand coming to your face tugging your lip from your teeth.

That does it and you burst into tears. All of the boys quickly try and comfort you by hugging you. "It's okay love." You hear Seungmin say and that causes you to cry harder. "I missed you guys." You sob into their arms and they feel guilty about not being able to spend as much time with you.

When your tears finally stop the boys pull away but Felix doesn't. "You have to take care of yourself. Okay? No matter how much you miss us. You have to promise us that okay?" Felix says holding a pinky promise and you can't help but smile at the childish gesture. You take his pinky finger in yours too.

"I promise." You say and he kisses your hand.

"HUG PILE!!!" Jisung shouts and he throws himself on you followed by the rest of your boyfriends.

"You're squishing me!" You manage to say while laughing.

"Yeah. With our love." Hyunjin says making you laugh harder.

The boys pull away not before each kissing you on the lips. "We all love you no matter how busy we get. Remember that." Hyunjin says planting another kiss on your lips.

You were grateful to have all of your 8 boyfriends love for you and each other.

#poly skz #skz fluff #stray kids fluff

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fuck-customers · 7 months

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🎂(8/21/23) This will be a bit long but now that I don't work at the bakery anymore I felt like sharing the list of things that customer's did that genuinely irked me amongst other feelings:

Things customers do or say at work that make me want to commit a war crime (+ my thoughts I can't say outloud):

"I want to get one of everything. 🤪" (Fun fact, 1 of everything is about $100)

"I'm shouldn't even be in here right now." (Then why are you???)

"I'm breaking my diet for this." (I don't care.)

I shouldn't be eating this I'm diabetic." (I have family that's diabetic. Please actually take care of yourself. 😐)

Does __ count for the B5G1F?" (No, it's actually only the vanilla cake squares. /s)

"Can I have one of that and one of that?" (The name. Is on the display case. SAY THE GOD DAMN NAME.)

"Are yall still open?" (You were able to open the door weren't you? You were able to step inside…weren't you??)

"Wow I got here just in time huh?"

(Yeah. You did. Now hurry the fuck up.)

after paying for the things they've already wanted "Can I actually get _ too?" (I can't really tell you no but holy shit why did you just now think of this?)

after paying for their things they proceed to look at all the merchandise and find something else "I'm gonna get this too." (Of course you are. 😐)

points at the devil's food cake, which is clearly labeled "Is this a brownie?" (Does it look??? Like a brownie??? If you move to your left about 4 feet you'll see actual brownies.)

"Can I get a devils food cake square?" "With which icing?" "…what do you mean?" "We have 3 different icing flavors for the devils food cake. Which icing?" "Oh. Chocolate. :)" (Fuckin- you can clearly see that we have 3 different icing flavors on display why is this so hard.)

"I don't get how you can work in here." (I need a paycheck and I get a good discount.

Also after a while you get bored of all the sugar.)

"I wouldn't be able to work in here. I'd eat everything. Haha" (Haha, yeah, I bet you would. 🙄)

literally anyone who comes in reeking of weed (…can you don't though? Idec that you smoke but why are you coming in when it's so strong???)

"Can I get a pint/quart of this flavor of ice cream?" (…why. I hate making pints and quarts its stupid and if the ice-cream is super frozen it's an actual pain in the ass.)

any family of 5+ that comes in all wanting ice cream (Please go away.)

"Can I get the pieces that have a lot of icing?" (Not really, cause the baker spread it pretty thin.)

*grown adult gets pouty when they realize that the cake squares I gave them had a

thinner layer of icing than the display* (Much like when you were a kid, pouting doesn't help. Do you want the cake or not?)

someone asks how good a certain item is I generally say it's pretty/really good. "Oh, its just pretty good?" (Yeah, cause I'm not a huge fan of that item. But you might like it cause, you know, different taste.)

Literally anyone who doesn't know the pick up name for a cake, or any details about the cake.

Wanting a fondant cake with a 24 hour notice and getting upset when we can't do it (fondant takes a least 2 days to dry)

People who forget which store they placed their order at. (We only have 2 locations????)

People who don't understand that we close early on Sundays.

People who leave the store reeking of weed. Like, the smell stays for like 5 minutes.

People who come in for a specific flavor that

we've never made. And get upset that we dont/wont/can't make it.

Everyone who doesn't understand that pumpkin spice and carrot cake are seasonal flavors that replace each other during the year. (And no. We can't just make you a carrot cake cake during pumpkin spice season because we physically don't have the ingredients.)

Everyone who doesn't understand the big 5 get 1 free deal.

People who try to open the door an hour before we open or an hour before we close and look visibly upset when they see me not move to let them in like we arent???? Open???

People who don't even try to open the door at our smaller store and think we're closed when we are open. (And people are often inside.)

People who try to hold a conversation for way too long

People who don't take an extra 2 minutes to look for what they want before asking me

where it is only for it to be a foot to their left.

People who dawdle at closing time.

People who leave their phone/cask/card in their car and have to run out to get it. They normally don't notice until their rung up.

People who try to break a $100 bill within the first hour of being open then get surprised when we don't have enough change to do that.

One of the worst interactions I had was in the bakery. This lady asked me if the strawberry cheesecake was good. I said "if you like strawberry it is." I guess that offended her somehow and she made it her mission to see my try a piece so I can tell her if it's good.

The problem with her plan is I'm allergic to strawberries. She was not having any of my "lies" and found anyone and everyone one and told them I am a horrible worker because I refused to "accommodate her request." She eventually ran into the only douche canoe manager we had at the time and got him to start insisting I try a bite to make her happy. I ended up just walking out on the rest of the shift and he tried to write me up. HR forced him to drop it when I threatened to sue.

-Rodney

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journey-to-the-attic · 4 months

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bold of you to assume we (or atleast i) dont want to read paragraphs about ik's and belphie's dynamic 😈😈

if you feel like writing that, i'd absolutely love to read about it!!! ^^

RIGHT YES this took me a hot minute but let's go!!!!

so the main points that this is all built around:

belphie is someone who is absolutely shit at understanding himself

ik is someone who has a knack for understanding anyone she talks to for long enough

belphie's first resort is usually to leave things to someone else, but easily asserts the things he wants

ik will actively pursue you if she thinks she can help, despite usually feeling guilty about requesting anything

they both have very simple views of very complicated things

building from point 1: this is not entirely belphie's fault - i've talked about this before, so i'll just paste the pertinent bits here:

belphie, as the youngest brother, has been detrimentally coddled in regards to these things, and has NO fucking idea how to properly deal with loss the others haven't tried to talk to him about his grief for lilith, nor about their experiences during the celestial war; when they all had to support each other after the fall, they comforted him, but never ever discussed the pain of it all it's like the doctor refusing to talk about your actual symptoms because they're afraid of making you uncomfortable, and instead just soothingly going "it's okay, just take some ibuprofen and see me in the morning"

belphie underestimates himself and, at the start of the year, is convinced that there's no way forward - 1. he feels he's left it too late, 2. he feels he's the only one still hung up on lilith's death, which only makes him more bitter, and 3. he thinks that the hatred and grief is just who he is now

now take ik, who finds him in the attic and takes worryingly little convincing to help him - even more concerningly, she decides to go through with it even upon finding out he was lying about his identity. this is a direct contradiction to his conviction that humanity is selfish and cruel - more than that, the more ik visits and chats with him, the more he remembers why he'd been so fascinated by humans as an angel

except it also reminds him of how much lilith loved humanity. belphie doesn't think he's capable of letting go - he doesn't think he's allowed to, and to him befriending a human and moving on is the same as betraying his sister's memory. so he represses any feelings of good-will and continues to nurse his hatred

i think it's important to note that belphie's hang-ups have always been self-destructive before this, but the more he lets his own grief fester, the more it threatens to burst. his threat to lucifer about destroying humanity is an early indicator of this, and it culminates in a moment of extreme emotional distress where it finally all implodes

so ik - in the wrong place and the wrong time (in the literal sense) - finds him in the middle of a nightmare, wakes him up, and gets murdered for her troubles

belphie shuts down immediately after, because to him this is a point of no return. he's already convinced himself that nothing can be done for him, and this is the proof. except then everyone else forgets what's happened, and, panicking, he goes along with it - out of fear of losing his family if he comes clean.

so: point 2 - consider that a big thing with ik is that she just doesn't get why belphie acts the way he does after killing her. she's been able to get into the heads of his brothers before him, and even now can somewhat rationalise them forgetting, but she has no idea why belphie - who first killed her and then acted like he'd forgotten about it - would suddenly seem so wracked with guilt upon finding him in the dreamscape

belphie does not think he is strong enough to move on. ik, somehow, intrinsically, already knows this is not true. this is why she's so bewildered by belphie telling her lilith's story. he's convinced this is some kind of damning evidence, but ik doesn't get how this explains anything. and because she doesn't understand, she seeks answers.

now take point 3 and 4. belphie does not attempt to seek forgiveness - he just sits in the cell solomon locks him in. he doesn't try to get out, he doesn't attempt to repent, and he doesn't want to, because as far as he's concerned there's nothing to be done

ik, on the other hand, is going to put her home back together by force if necessary, so she goes to find him. multiple times, she climbs up the tower stairs to rescue him from a waking nightmare - the same thing that killed her - because her family is still his family, and she knows too well what it's like when you go without.

belphie has been sitting stagnant for millennia on end, and now ik has decided that she is going to KICK him along until he figures out that he can stand on his own two feet and keep going. and it works, because for some reason digging demons out of emotional pits of their own creation is ik's specialty

and now point 5: ik and belphie fall quite easily into a typical sibling dynamic of the "i'll make fun of you constantly, but if anyone messes with you they're dead" kind. they never really sit down to talk out all the residual Baggage of everything, because neither of them are the type to overthink these things

but EVEN THEN. they may be simple-minded but the complication of the everything that led up to this means there's little hidden meanings even in the normalcy of their behaviour, and neither of them ever register it

for belphie it's "i'll never understand you. thank you for understanding me. i don't know what to say, so i'll tease you for tripping on your laces instead. i'd throw someone down a gorge if they made you cry. let's go shopping. i think i'll spend the rest of my life wondering if i can ever close the wound i tore in your soul."

for ik it's "i'll never forget what you did to me. i see you in my nightmares sometimes. thanks for waiting for me after school. quit making a show out of helping me reach the top shelf. sometimes i'm glad you regret things so much. can you help me with this homework? i think we're alright."

and for both of them it's "i like hanging out with you. sleep well. i'm glad we're home."

in conclusion,

i am crazy about things i made up entirely. perhaps i am cringe but i am free

#answering asks #valenrien #and also #anon asks #i meant to write this out like two days ago but i got Super Invested out of nowhere #in drawing this one thing of solomon and mephisto #idk if i'll get around to fully finishing it so like 75/25 whether i'll ever post it #but it's been very fun. i finish my work and then get to go 'hehehe time to go draw gay people'#for brief moments my youth was returned to me and i was fifteen years old #and drawing godzilla going on dates with various dinosaur and dragon ocs again #i haven't drawn godzilla in years. i used to be so good at it. i should draw him hanging out with ik #but anyway. in conclusion #belphie is a wounded animal in a beartrap and ik is the farmer's boy who loses a finger trying to prise it open #ik's unrelenting and fierce campaign for everyone she loves to just be NICE to themselves is almost frightening to belphie #who doesn't quite comprehend how she does it and doesn't feel he's quite earned forgiveness #except what ik's forgiveness forces him to confront is exactly what he deserves

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spooky-all-year-round · 10 months

Text

Battle Confession

The prompts: "I thought I'd never see you again" and "You said... 'I love you'."

SFW G/n Reader x Ominis. This takes place post-game, I left it open for what the situation could be but if the triwizard tournament happens their 6th year then this would be in their 7th. Cause Hogwarts can never have one peaceful year. =)

Trigger warnings: hints of violence, anxiety, sad ominis, but it's happy I promise!

You were running flat out, students were being ushered out of the castle in droves. You were forcing your way past and between them. You had to get to the fight. You rounded the corner and spotted blonde slicked back hair and a robe lined with green. Slamming to a stop you shouted his name, grabbing his left hand with your right and placed your left hand on his right arm to stop him fully. "Ominis i need to tell you something." You were desperate, he had to know.

"What? Tell me later, we need to leave! The teachers said we all need to get off of school grounds! Its not-" he started.

"Ominis I dont know how this will all end. But I need you to know that I love you!" You placed a quick kiss on his cheek before taking off again. His shouts were quickly drowned out between the distance and the sounds of everyone leaving. All you knew is that you needed to save everyone. You needed to save him. Even if it meant you couldn't stay by his side.

You awoke a week later in the hospital wing early in the morning. Matron Blainey filled you in on your injuries and what she has done to heal them and on all the gifts that were left and visiors that had come by. Most notably one Mr.Gaunt, who came daily and for as long as he could. After all was said and done she stated she wanted to keep you overnight for observation and gave you a potion to help you sleep some more.

When you woke up this time it must have only been a few hours later. You could feel drops hit your hand and just as you wondered how there was even possibly a leak in this castle, you began to notice things. That hand was warm, clasped between two of someone else's. And there was a soft hitch in breath before more quiet shuddering breaths came. "Please, you have to come back. You cant leave me." A stiffled sob. "I cant lose you. I wish I had stopped you. Dragged you out of the school myself. I cant believe I froze. That I let you run off into danger again."

You're heart ached he couldnt possibly blame himself. You body was sore and so tired but you had to push through. You had to let him know it wasnt his fault. Sweet Ominis, sitting here crying, blaming himself for your reckless heroics. Had this been what he has been doing every day he visited?

You started trying to push yourself up but only managing a few shifts thanks to the sleeping potion weighing your body down. But it was enough to catch his attention. Because he let out a small gasp and a whisper of your name as if he couldnt believe you were awake. You slowly blinked your eyes open squinting at the sun coming from the other side of the room. His face was one of shock, his beautiful icy blue eyes looking in your direction, even from this angle you could see the beautiful star burst pattern in them. He stood up while reaching for his wand, ready to grab Matron Blainey. He stopped short when he felt your hand tighten around his as you begged, "No please, let me be with you for a moment. I spoke with her earlier." He sat back down obligingly, you could now see his puffy eyes and the hint of red on his nose and cheeks from crying. Slowly you reached up with your other hand to gently hold his face. Another tear started to roll down his cheek. "Ominis my dear, please dont blame yourself. I had to do it. I had to save the school, I had to save you."

He shook his head. "To hell with the school. The teachers could have handled it. You've saved it before so why must you again? I should have stopped you. I should have begged you. Anything to get you to come to safety!" His words were cut off by another sob and you took the chance to stop his spiralling.

"They needed me, they needed my powers. They're strong but they needed my magic to put a stop to it. I'm sorry I didn't explain more but I had to go. The longer i took the worse the aftermath wouldve been." Your voice was almost a haze as you did your best to keep yourself from crying.

"You said ...'I love you'." His voice trailed off with that statement. It hung in the air like a question, a plea to know what you meant.

"I thought I'd never see you again. I wanted you to know for a while now. We became so close so quickly and I fell so hard. I couldn't ever get the courage to tell you, I didn't want to lose you over it. But knowing there was a good chance I'd never see you again... I had to tell you." The words just came spilling out. You were anxious to explain, not wanting him to cut in.

He was silent for far too long, his tears had stopped at some point, but your's were welling up. The panic set in, your heart going both too fast and too hard. It hurt so bad, like your heart might break your ribs. He didnt return your feelings. Here you were, ruining one of the few friendships you had because you just had to spill your heart out. Your whole body was trembling and now your tears were streaming non-stop down your face.

He chuckled before bringing your hand to kiss the back of it. "You couldn't find the courage? Well I don't feel like such a coward hearing that. My darling, I have been infatuated with you for so long. I don't know when it turned to love, but it has been that way for a while. You are the warmth of the sun wrapped up as a person. The sweet melody that gets caught and stuck in my head. A cold drink on a hot day. A comforting story after a terrible nightmare. I have bent to your whims when I was solid as stone to others. I would find a way to give you the universe if you so much as hinted that you wanted it. I would do anything if it made you happy, regardless of how it made me feel. I dont know why but something in you pulls me harder then any accio that could ever be performed. I have heard of soulmates and it would be the only explanation I could give right now. I never wish to lose you and it killed me to think I almost did. You feel like safety and comfort to me... I love you so much."

His declaration knocked the wind out of you. How could you respond to that? So you did the only thing you could think of within your physical abilities. You pulled his hands back towards you and kissed both of them. "How could i go anywhere when the one place i want to be is with you?"

#ominis gaunt #hogwarts legacy ominis #ominis #ominis x reader #ominis imagine #ominis one shot #sfw #ominis sfw #ominis x you #ominis x mc #ominis x y/n #g/n reader

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thenightfolknetwork · 5 months

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I didn't mean to. It was an accident. I swear I didn't know. I just...

The town I'm from is secluded, very secluded. Still using landlines and slow and spotty internet secluded. It's one of those towns hidden away by mountains and trees that take days to get in and out of. My point is that news is slow to get in, and about half is debated as rumor and "conspiracies against the common people."

I hope im saying this right. As i said, resources are limited, so please forgive any offense. The "People of the Night" are still thought to be myth here. If there are any um "Nightfolk" here, they haven't made themselves known. Not that I'd blame them, but it would have made this a lot easier, maybe prevented it even. I'm sorry I'm rambling, I'm still a bit shaken.

I thought I was just approachable. When someone's lost or needed help, they'd always find their way to me. No trouble at all, I enjoyed it. But it happened so often, My friends used to say that I "just had one of those faces."

It felt good to be needed. I'd ask how someone was. They'd vent to me what was going on, and I listened. If I could and they wanted it, I'd offer advice, but most just wanted to be heard.

But, a couple of weeks ago, I was walking with my best friend. We were just catching up, nothing serious. It was meant to be a joke, a reference to my tendency of "being one of those faces." I asked her if she had any dark secrets she wanted to share.

She did.

You'd thought I'd told her to do it at knifepoint. Her story came pouring out like an overpowered hose. When she finished, the look she gave me. I can't unsee it.

When it was over, i tried to thank her for trusting me with such sensitive information, but she told me to save it. I don't know how, but we both knew it was my fault.

She told my friend group what happened and now no one wants to speak to me. I tried to explain myself, but they refused to listen or trust what I had to say. Out of frustration, I asked one person why they were avoiding me, and they responded, "Because I always knew you were weird."

There was no denying that I... forced them to tell me that in some way, but it wasn't on purpose! But I must have proved something because now I can't leave my house because everyone is LOOKING at me.

I've been using a paper and pencil to get by as well as trying to learn BSL because im afraid to speak again. How many of those talks that I had were unvoluntary? How many people were forced to be honest and just pretended to be civil because they were scared of me?

I don't know if this is new or something that I'd always done. I'm alone here. The only reason I know as much as I do about the Creature Community is because I accidentally stumbled across your show on my radio.

I dont know who i am anymore. I miss singing and talking to people, but I'm terrified that I'll compel someone by accident. How do I get better? Where do I go from here?

Oh, reader. This must be a very frightening, upsetting time for you. I'm so glad you felt able to reach out to us here at the Nightfolk Network for support.

First of all, I hope you are able to see the difference between taking responsibility for your past actions, and making a martyr of yourself. You have been unthinkingly, unknowingly hurting people, and you do need to recognise that before you can try to make amends. But the harm you caused was entirely accidental. Please, be gentle with yourself.

In terms of practical steps forwards, I can reassure you: you are not alone in your powers, or in finding them difficult to control. Often powers of this kind make themselves known early in an individuals life, and you can imagine how difficult it can be to control the spoken wishes of a babbling toddler.

Nevertheless, many people in your situation go on to live perfectly ordinary lives with good control over their powers. And you have the advantage over a toddler, in that you are not only fully cognisant of the detrimental effects of such powers but also already able to find alternative ways to communicate.

Your first step is to contact your GP and arrange an appointment to discuss the matter. Write them a letter explaining the situation, and emphasising your need to conduct the appointment without speech. In a small, rural community like yours, it's very likely your GP will have little to no personal experience of such cases. But they will be able to refer you to an NHS specialist with whom you can explore possible treatment options.

In most cases, those options will be either medication, behavioural therapy, or more usually a combination of the two. I understand that there is a great deal of stigma around thauma-damping medication. Please, resist this pattern of thought.

Medication is nothing more or less than a tool we might use to help us live our lives. Taking medication does not indicate a lack of effort or will on your part in controlling your powers. It just makes a very difficult thing slightly easier.

However, NHS waiting lists for this type of treatment can be lengthy. In the meantime, I strongly recommend you reach out as best you can to your community. Writing a letter, text or email to your best friend would be a good start, explaining the situation as best you can and leaving the door open for her to rekindle the relationship if she feels able.

Unfortunately, there's nothing you can do to forcibly mend the relationship. You can only present yourself honestly and hope that, in time, you are able to find your way back to something like the friendship you shared before this.

In the meantime, try to connect with other people in the community if you can. The Internet can be a wonderful place to connect with others, and your local library may have information about support groups in the wider area.

Above all, reader, take heart. There is plenty to be hopeful about here. You are not doomed to a life of fearful silence, or of isolation and solitude. With a little work, and plenty of support from the people around you, I see no reason why you shouldn't enjoy a long and happy life full of genuine connection with the people around you.

#answered #the nightfolk network #monstrous agonies

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polyhexian · 3 days

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I'm gonna leave a long comment on Tell-No-Lies Ch 3 cuz I have a lot of thoughts, but these thoughts aren't for the fic itself so I'm dropping them here:

Low-key really obsessed with what Caitlyn's existence and death does for Eda's character.

From an extremely basic archetypal storytelling POV, Eda's character isn't what you'd expect. She's the most powerful witch in the BI, she hates the Emperor, she's a rebel, she's the mom figure in the ragtag team of misfits--in the elevator pitch of this story, you'd expect her to be leading the rebellion.

But she's not. TOH isn't a story about a concentrated rebellion against Belos; the rebellion barely exists. Season 1 never even mentions anyone actively fighting against the empire, the BATTs consist of 4 people, the CATTs don't have many more. The fact that resistence efforts were so small kinda annoyed me, but I can believe that any rebellion really is just that disconnected, disorganized, and ineffective. It's not the typical Rebels vs Empire narrative, but it DOES make sense. (And the story does itself the favor of not insisting that there's TOTALLY a massive rebel effort we've never heard about.)

And Eda's not a selfless rebel leader fighting for the greater good. She's fighting for herself. She hates the Emperor, but she hates all authority. She won't lead a fight against Belos, because she doesn't want to be a leader. She isn't going to perform some huge rebellious act against him; just existing the way she wants is an act of rebellion. She helps the BATTs, but she doesn't carry on the fight once they're captured except for trying to get through to Raine. She and Luz barely fight against the empire at all until a week before the Day of Unity.

Eda isn't a selfless rebel leader fighting for the greater good, she just wants to live wild and free, and it really does make sense.

But wow, Caitlyn's story really does enhance Eda's characterization. Idk how much the Clawthornes know about Caitlyn's fate, but I'd assume they know at least a bit. Eda and Caitlyn never met, but family history leaves an impact.

You had an aunt. She was a proud wild witch. She ran away to Latissa to help the rebellion there, and your family has no idea what happened to her.

You had an aunt. She was captured in Latissa. Escaped rebels told your family they saw the Golden Guard himself take her down.

You had an aunt. She was imprisoned in the castle. Her surviving friends who chose sigils over death said the Emperor himself took an interest in her, and they never saw her again.

You had an aunt. She was publically executed, made an example of after seriously injuring a coven official in an escape attempt.

You had an aunt. Your family received a form letter from the Emperor's Coven informing you of her death while in their custody. They never sent her body.

You had an aunt. Her body was returned to your family, but the Emperor's Coven didn't bother to explain her missing arm or anything else aside from saying that wild witches deserve what they get.

You had an aunt. Your family received a crate of pulverized stone.

You had an aunt. She valued her freedom, and she fought for it for herself and others. She ran off to join a rebellion to try and make a difference. She paid a steep price for it, and your family paid the interest.

You're wild and free, and you refuse to take a sigil or bow to the Emperor. You refuse to conform, to fit in a box, to make yourself less.

But you also had an aunt, and you refuse to end up like her.

YES that is VERY MUCH the vibe!!!! and dont worry you will find out what happens to caitlyn in a different GG story i have

this is like a big rebellion push still early in the emperor's reign and its absolutely demolished with a massive show of brutal force. it strongly hampers future attempts at organized rebellion. belos operates on fear. he makes sure people are afraid to rebel. caitlyn was in latissa, but dell wasnt, gwen wasnt. she wanted to fight and it cost her dearly.

eda and lilith both wanted to join the emperor's coven growing up. i imagine very much that dell and gwen downplayed a lot of their own feelings about the coven system because they didnt want their young children to say the wrong thing and get killed for it. lilith knows she has an aunt who didnt follow the rules, and she paid for it. eda knows she had an aunt who died wild and free and strong and shes remembered with pride. they both take away what they take away. and eda very much takes away that organized rebellion is pointless, that it can't work, theres no point. you have to protect yourself. and also, that they WILL kill you if you give them the chance. so don't ever give them the chance. never ever ever submit. fight every single time.

all of my fun little prequels seek to add context that enhances canon lol, all of them are trying to flesh out an already rich world with just a little bit more juice. how the boiling isles history and peoples family lines affect who they become when we get to meet them... thats the good shit. chefs kiss.

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acaciapines · 23 days

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obviously if you’re busy leave this alone but: your tag essay has made me VERY intrigued about Dess and Azzy’s relationship in this AU. Tell me about it?

(also, did you see they did an announcement about Starship Iris season 3? It’s finally gonna happen!)

okay IM HERE TO TALK LOL i will NEVER not talk about this au <3 uhhh under a cut bc. really i should just expect these get super long.

big important note up top: all of this is in! early stages! things are not fully formed and researched yet so please keep that in mind as you read this. ideas might change and will get deeper as i do more work for this au, but since rn im focusing on owl house most of these are my ideas i've had without time to do deeper dives into them.

okay so with asriel i've always sort of written him as this guy who like...has an idea of what is 'normal' in his head, ie, what society wants from people, and what it doesnt want, and he has tried his hardest his entire life to always fit into this box. (think about i know im not well--this is why he's always seen kris as a human. being nonhuman is abnormal and gets you punished in society. to an extent this is also how he views dess being aromantic.)

i think a lot of this comes from fear--asriel IS for sure contorting himself and actively harming himself to stay inside this narrow box of 'normal' (think of this as another sort of prophecy--these are all touching on the same themes). and he applies this same mentality to other people BECAUSE of this fear, because he doesnt want his loved ones to be hurt, to be punished, ostracized, etc by society--which are i wanna be clear VERY MUCH THINGS THAT HAPPEN--but in doing this he sort of just hurts the people he loves. because instead of being someone who rejects these boxes hes like. no we gotta be good and fit into the boxes and then everything will be okay.

so when it comes to dess, dess has always very much Done Her Own Thing, consequences be damned. partly this is who she is, partly this is hashtag undiagnosed and untreated mental illness, the onset of which happens around when shes 18 and everything is going down with the bunker (which is NOT helping at ALL). and so when dess comes back from the bunker asriel does very much go 'oh. shes delusional.' and proceed to be No Help At All.

and like, the thing is dess IS very much having a psychotic break. this bit is very much still in deep research (sidenote: anybody in my audience who has experience w/ these things. feel free to hit me up/dm me lol i'd love to talk through some of my ideas as a sort of preliminary sensitivity read, but of course only do this if you are up to it, no pressure lol bc again we're in early stages) but she has schizoaffective + bipolar disorder. dark worlds dont help with this, asriel SUPER doesnt help with this (he doesnt know her actual disorder--neither of them do, this is the onset of things. but tbf even if he did he Would Not Help asriel is essentially doing everything wrong here.) and what dess needs is literally one single person in her corner but the person who is supposed to be in her corner (azzy) is basically being like 'you are making this up' and shes like im NOT, and everything is all mixed together, terrible, bad, awful, and eventually everything culminates and. we know what happens.

(side note but this is why she and chara work real well together actually--chara gets her when asriel doesnt!!)

asriel never actually like. tells anybody about this though. in his head after its assumed dess and kris have died he sort of just. is like well this proves it. i cant let anybody else i care about go that far EVER AGAIN, because if i was a better friend i would've noticed and i wouldve stopped it and made dess "normal." (yes asriel sucks here. the focus is on the kids but. he's getting an arc. i do promise he will get better but. that doesnt really fix what he's done in the past.)

and all of this is like. it fucking sucks for the people around asriel. in hurting himself he's hurting his loved ones--it pushes dess away, and that relationship is never going to be the same. even when asriel realizes how he fucked up i dont think dess really forgives him. because if asriel had just believed her, or at least even if he didnt actually took her seriously and tried to help, shes like. things wouldve gone differently. and asriel knows this too.

and then when it comes to NOELLE, well. asriel's always been very overprotective of her. terrified the world is going to hurt her. and so when noelle starts experiencing things, things she cant tell if theyre real or not...

she doesnt tell him. she doesnt tell anybody. she keeps it all to herself, and this means its a hell of a lot easier for the player/red soul to manipulate her. and nobody finds out until its too late.

#ask #drkau #hi welcome to the reveal of a real big thing this au is about that i havent mentioned anywhere yet <3 #unless youre one of two people in which case hey. hey guys.#but yeah uh. ive had some thoughts. about what i want to do. try to say.#about prophecy and how that relates to This World Here #and yes the only place i can say those things is in a deltarune au <3 i love my life #also STARSHIP IRIS S3 YES. I SAW. SO EXCITED.#also also. writing this it hit me that holy shit asriel is the monster in 'human monster prince from the dark' isnt he. fuck. god.#GOD BC. if this is all tying back into prophecy...we get the red soul upholding it...azzy upholding it..and ralsei who was supposed to #but shes the one who BREAKS IT. oh my god. okay lemme write this down love having banger ideas in the tags

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that-lame-ghoul9000 · 2 years

Note

Maybe a shower smut with eddie ? 😗

April Showers 🌧

Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Summary: Its the beginning of track season at Hawkins High. And while your boyfriend is super supportive(from under the bleachers) of your athletic choices, you can't deny practice has taken up way to much of your time. And Eddie intends to make up for lost time.

Word count: 3.3k 😳🥲

TW: SMUT 18+ MINORS GO TOUCH SOME GRASS, DONT INTERACT, established relationship, Shower sex, semi public sex (girls locker room), its a quicky that feels like forever because im a slut for getting carried away rambling. Im sorry. swearing, Unprotected sex it's not stated but reader is on birth control. Just pretend. (don't be silly, wrap your willy. A pregnancy test is one Etch-a-sketch that can't be undid homeskillet) -Oral- (m receiving) Spit. He spits in readers mouth. Pet names(baby or babe i can't remember, princess & sweetheart) probably forgot something. If I did please tell me.

This is so unedited. And written. Late at night.

A/n: 1.) Thank you so much for requesting this. I was so exited exited write it. With that said:

This is my first published work containing smut. Use lube and go easy on me I'll get better I swear. Give me feedback. Give me all the feedback.

2.)I never ran track. I don't know track season. So I'm sorry if this isn't accurate. I Googled HS track season and it said (training began oct-nov, with actual season being feb-may) and I just REALLY liked the title I picked. So sue me 🤣 and let me live in my fantasy world where after i had a choice I stopped participating in sports. Okay love you byeeee 😘

I do not give permission to have this posted anywhere else. (You'll only find it here and on my AO3 which is the same username) Please don't take my work. Ive worked hard on it and I'd like to continue doing it.

You were a good student. Reliable. Trustworthy. Responsible. Just a few adjectives thrown around by the faculty at Hawkins High. Which is why your guidance counselor and track coach had absolutely no problem giving you a spare key to the school gym and locker room only asking you clean up after yourself and lock up when you're done. Something you've been doing since last school year. You had a tendency to practice in the early hours of the morning. It was cool out. Quiet, with no one there to bother you. No overly horny teenage boys with way to much time on their hands and nothing better to do than yell scandalous risqué remarks at their classmates of the opposite sex simply because their little under developed, sex riddled, cavemen brains couldn't comput farther than: "Girls" "Shorts=ass" and running in a tee shirt was the closest half of them would ever get to seeing boobs bounce. Give them a few years. They may grow out of it.

For that late reason alone you preferred morning runs on the track. Reserving the after school evenings for team practice. Where you'd still try hard. But not hard enough to elicit said comments.

It's almost the end of April and most, if not all, of your time has been spent on this track. You began as soon as the leaves started falling in mid October at the indoor gym at the request of your coach. But it was a drive. Which is what prompted you to ask to use the gym in the mornings last year once it got semi warm enough to begin using the outdoor track.

If you weren't on the track you had your nose shoved in some AP class workbook. Grades were very important to you. Just as important as sports. As they went hand in hand. This unfortunately meant skipping out on plans with your friends. Often.

Which also meant having to "rain check" dates with your boyfriend. Claiming

"Unless you're going to throw 'Study' in front of that 'date' word, we're going to have to give it a rain check."

Now you'd think most guys would love a good 'Study' date. Not your boyfriend. It's as if the word itself was dipped in holy water and burned him simply thinking about it. Which is funny considering who he is. That's right. Little Ms. Straight A's Sporty McSportsPants boyfriend was none other than the infamous Devil worshiping, master of the occult, every parents worst nightmare for their sweet baby, friendly neighborhood bad boy.

Eddie. Mother fucking. Munson.

And although his chocolate button, puppy dog eyes were so close to making you say "fuck it" and toss your books in the air. You had to be the level headed responsible one of you both. Easier said than done. You'd not hadn't had much time together in months. Aside from the half hour at lunch, Mrs. O'Donnell's class (which she conveniently had you both on separate ends of the classroom) the few minutes after practice you got before having to rush home for dinner, and a night filled with homework. Your time together was really few and far between. And while it made you both sad, Eddie would still find cute ways to keep you from getting discouraged. From cute notes of encouragement in your locker on days you'd have track meets. (Especially the ones you were nervous about) Throwing rocks at your window after your parents had gone to bed to get some time in with you till you fell asleep. Even if it was only 10 minutes. And sometimes if you looked real close you'd see him under the bleachers cheering you on. You really couldn't understand why everyone thought the awful things they did about him.

On this particular morning it was cool out. Slightly windy. And very overcast. The gray sky looking like it would give way to rain at a moments notice. You almost opted to not practice this morning. But you had a big meet coming up this Saturday and there was no way you were losing. You pulled your Hawkins High Tigers hoodie off exposing your skin to the cool air. Letting out a shiver you jogged to the track. Looking at your watch

5:30am (this should be illegal)

Setting your alarm for 6:30, giving yourself exactly one hour before you needed to head to the locker room and hit the shower. Kids would start arriving by 7:30. This would give you the perfect amount of time to Shower, dry your hair and drop your clothes in your locker before grabbing a muffin and heading to class.

You begin running your laps and time just runs away with you. Though you're not racing a physical person you feel a sense of competition. You're racing time. And time is racing you.

~~~~♤~~~~~♡~~~~~♤~~~~

You made it 30 minutes in before you heard it. The soft low rumble of the incoming thunder announcing the imminent approaching storm. The wind began to pick up as well. Not that you'd complained it helped keep you cool for the most part.

Deciding not to chance it you run off to the bleachers and grab your bookbag along with your duffle that had your change of clothes, shampoo, towel and all important keys that granted you access to the areas of the school you needed. And with that you jogged to the school building.

As you reach the girls locker room you head into the shower room and turn the water on allowing it enough time to heat up. You exit back to the locker room and begin to remove your shoes and socks. But just as you're getting to your shorts you hear the door open. Causing you to pause.

"Hello? This room is currently being used."

Nothing.

"If there's someone in here you have exactly 3 seconds to make yourself known or I'll borrow Bethany's softball bat. And ive been told I've got a pretty good swing." You yell out.

"I'd love to see you swing a bat. Bet it be hot as hell."

You jump, turning on a heel to face the intruder. He's smirking at you from under that beautiful mess of hair.

"Edward Alan Munson, I can and I will if ever do that again. What are you doing here?" you ask confused. Knowing this man isn't known for getting up early.

"Firstly, just because Wayne let it slip the one night he came home early and saw us making out on the couch, doesn't mean my middle name is available for public use. Even if it's from someone as cute as you. And it is super cute when you use it in your 'I'm so serious tone." he boops your nose.

"Secondly, I knew you'd be here even if a tornado threatened to rip the school down to its foundation because you have your meet against Greenwood on Saturday and, for reasons I'll never understand in the world of sports, you'd rather die than let them win this year."

You rolled your eyes with a smile at his comment. It was a true statement.

"And thirdly, I'll take any time I can get with you." He smirks dropping his jacket and vest all in one go. "You just say the word. It's always better to shower with a friend. Conserve water you know. Great for the planet. Wouldn't want you to slip in there." His brain thinking of more excuses. But he's cut off as soon as he sees you slowly walk backward toward the showers pulling your shirt off and winking at him before dropping your shorts, grabbing your shampoo & body wash and walking through the door. And he's so quick to shed the rest of what's in the way almost falling and breaking his neck trying to get his jeans off. With a final tug his shirt falls to the ground and he's running after you like a kid in a candy store to the showers.

You were already under the water, in an attempt to try and at least was your body before all hell broke loose, when you feel his hands slowly snake around your hips a he pulls you closer to him. Until you feel his skin against yours. And his very prominent hard on pressed against your back. A shiver of excitement pulses through you in every direction as he slowly sweeps his hands across your body. Agonizingly slow. You lean your head back against his chest and he let's out a chuckle.

"Someone seems a little stressed." He says into your ear in a breathy voice that has your legs turning to jello. His hands feather light skimming across your breasts. So light you might have missed it if weren't for him adding the slightest of weight to his hand as he circled your nipper.

You felt yourself begin to relax under his touch. A breathy moan as you say his name,

"Eddie."

The verbal action making his cock twitch against your back.

"Yes Princess." He teased.

"Touch me, please."

"I am touching you." He laughed.

What he'd give to take his time with you. He'd have you so relaxed to the point you'd forget your own name. Only remembering his because he'd have you screaming it repeatedly. But he knew you were both on borrowed time so he cut to the chase.

"Okay sweetheart but only because you asked so nicely." He kissed the side of you temple as his hands moved lower and lower. Till he was still semi teasing you by gently rubbing your legs.

"Edd-" you didn't even get his name out before he said

"Let's see just how excited you are for me" and dipping his middle and ring finger to swipe through your slick folds.

Eliciting a moan that could only be described by Eddie as what the heavens must sound like.

"Jesus baby, even you can't play this one off as shower water. You're absolutely soaked." He said softly biting your ear. You're a mess, as he slides his fingers up slowly till he finds your clit and begins running soft figure eights into the little nub. Not enough to do to much but enough to get you more worked up. If it wasn't for Eddie holding you up right now you'd fall to the floor.

Which gives you an idea. Since you're kinda on a time crunch. You pull his hand away, even though it pained you to do it. Turn around, and grab his face before he can protest bridging the gap you've caused between you two for the most intense kiss to ever exist at 6:48 in the morning. A clashing of teeth and tongue but only for a brief moment. Because before the boy in front of you could register the series of events unfolding in front of him you drop to your knees looking up at him through wet lashes (which he's now moved to the top of his list of 'hottest images of my girlfriend burned into my brain to date')

Giving a slight devilish smile before running your hands delicately over his things in almost the same slow, agonizing pace he was teasing you with not moments ago.

Throwing his head back you hear him mutter a "fuuuuuck me" to which you replied "oh trust me i plan to" as you grasp his length in your left hand and begin stroking a few times. Making sure to run your thumb over his aching tip that's beading with pre-cum to gather it and as he looks down you stick in your mouth to suck off. A sort of pre-warning. One that he can barely handle. And with a pop you remove your thumb replacing back on his aching cock, pumping once. Twice. Thrice before giving the prominent vein under his cock a lick from base to tip finally taking as much of him in as you possibly could. Thank God for the wall behind him because he throws his head back and becomes one with the wall thrusting his hand into your hair and gathering it to keep it out of your face.

"F-Fuckin hell. You are so damn good at that. God's baby who knew such a good girl could have such a bad mouth."

The moan you release sending sweet vibrations to parts of him he didn't know existed. Its all going to his head. And rather quickly. You begin pumping what you can't fit as you continue bobbing your head up and down at a pace Eddie has deemed 'fucking perfect'.

"God baby if you keep up like this I won't last much longer." He looks down.

You look up at him with doe eyes through lashes coated in tiny water droplets. He's died and gone to heaven. He feels his release nearing and he's quick to remove himself before he does. Lifting you up to your feet.

"As much as I'd love to cum down your throat. Let's I don't know rain check it," He jests, 'because right now I want to fuck you up against," He paused looking at the 3 available walls in this shower wall eliminating the one with the knobs and shower head, "that wall. But first open, since i know you were so looking forward to having my cum run down your throat. Here's a substitute." He quickly takes his middle and ring finger, swiping them up your soaking cunt, returning them to his mouth to quickly suck and savor how you taste on his tongue. He taps your jaw and your quick to open for him. As he spits a mixture of your slick and his spit into your mouth.

"Swollow." He doesn't have to ask twice. And because he can't help himself his mouth is quick to seek out yours in a passionate kiss filled with teeth, tongue and the fact this will be way faster than either of you want it to be. Suddenly he's tapping your thighs signaling you to jump and you do. Your back is met with the cool stall wall as Eddie is quick to line himself up with your center. There's no slowness anymore. You've all but run out of time, students would start arriving soon. And from previous moments with Eddie you both came to the realization, you weren't quiet. And you couldn't be even if you wanted to.

As he slides in you let out a pornagraphic moan and let your head fall back against the wall. Legs wrapping around his waist, one arm half hazardly drapped around his neck the other holding his shoulder. He stretches you out perfectly. And you fit him just as well.

"F-fuckin hell you're so goddamn tight. Just sucking my cock in. God I can feel you tightening around me."

You rock your hips a little to signal he's okay to move. And boy does he move. He slowly begins to piston in and out of you. Breathing heavy as the shower water falls down like the impending rain. It's probably raining right now. He begins kissing down your jaw to your neck getting to your collar bone where he begins sucking and biting, just a small mark. He likes looking at them later.

You're a moaning, swearing mess. Praying no one hears anything and decides to come looking to make sure a student isn't hurt. Which would be very awkward and extremely frustrating as you can feel that coil in you winding up, so close to snapping. And as if on cue Eddie snaps his hips up in such a way he hits that magic button and just like that his name tumbles out of your mouth. The only name you'll remember for the rest of the day.

Eddie.

RIGHT THERE

Eddie!

EDDIEEEEE

FUCK EDDIE DONT STOP

IM GONNA CU-

He continues his pistoning into that spot with everything he has in him. He's chasing his high and yours. His free hand snakes down to rub on your bundle of nerves in such a perfect way that he has you coming undone in seconds. Following behind you moments later. He slows his thrusting down as you ride out your highs. You rest your forehead on his as you both try to slow your eradicate breathing.

After a moment he pulls out of you slowly, trying his best not to make you uncomfortable. Still holding onto you because you currently have the legs and dexterity of a newborn deer. He kisses your nose as he reaches over and puts some shampoo in his hand returning to massage it into your hair.

"God he's perfect." You think to yourself with a small giggle.

"And whats, pray tell does the lady find funny." He smirks.

"You give me an mind altering orgasm. And now you're washing my hair. It's just cute is all."

"I'm making up for lost time. I believe you have at the very least 30 more coming your way in the near future. Not all at once. But I'm sure I can pull a few out of you with each of our upcoming 'Study' dates. I do need to pass Mrs. O'Donnell's class if i want to walk that stage with you. And I fully intend to." He winks. His statement making you're eyes widen and a blush fall across your cheeks.

"As long as we actually study first Edward Ala-" He cuts you off with quick kiss tilting your head back enough allow the water to wash the shampoo away without it getting into your eyes.

"I recall mentioning the ban of using my full name. But I'll excuse it this time as your brain is still probably a bit to fried." He smiles giving your forehead a quick kiss. And then you hear it. Your watch alerting you that it's 7:30. Fuck you'd have no time to dry your hair. Both mentally cursing the beeping noise, Eddie turns off the water.

"I'll go out first. And quickly get dressed. I'll set your clothes in here on the bench." You give him a kiss as he nods at your plan.

You grab your towel and quickly wrap yourself. Walking fast into the locker room. Pulling your clothes out. Sliding on all the articles. As quickly as you could without paying attention.

Trying to use the towel to dry your hair as best you could before running a brush through quickly and tossing it into a ponytail.

You run to gather all of Eddie's clothes and then set them on the bench.

"The towels a bit wet but it's here too. I'll see you in a minute." You smile as you hear the stall unlock.

Grabbing your bag you make sure the coast is clean before waiting outside the girls locker room door. A few moments later Eddie emerges.

"Hey sweetheart, come here often." He winks at you. Making you giggle.

"Occasionally. Do you?"

"I sure as hell might start coming more often." He grabs your backpack from your shoulder slinging it over his are before throwing his free arm around your shoulder.

"What do you say we go find our rowdie band of weirdos. They can't be left alone for too long. Especially not with Henderson.

"Okay let's go find your freshman children." You say, lacing your fingers in the hand draped around your shoulder. "I'd hate to think what weird heated conversation topic Dustin has Mike and Gareth. Kid gets a level over passionate about many things." Causing both of you you break out laughing.

"It's his tone. I swear it's his tone." Eddie breathes out. As you approach the cafeteria you look outside.

Just like you thought it's absolutely pouring out.

"Eddie." You whisper into his ear at a sudden realization before finding everyone at the table.

"Hmm" He looks at you puzzled.

"Eddie. We're both wet. They'll know why I am. But you never this awake this early. This," you look him up and down before finishing, "wet. They're going to know."

As he looks out the window.

He looks back at you with a smirk.

"I'd blame it on the rain. But I doubt they'd believe me."

April Showers is an understatement.

#eddie munson owns me #eddie munson #eddie munson stranger things #stranger things #eddie munson angst #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson smut #they knew exactly what they were doing #nah. team eddie munson can fuck me up any day that ends in y #shower smut with Eddie Munsons #its filth pure filth #izzy's asks #anon ask #anon submission

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blueberry-writer · 2 years

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hiyaaa sjdjdjf dont mind me keeping requesting for the doa, i really like them and your headcanons <3

I'd like to request platonic headcanons for nikolai, fyodor, and sigma like interacting with/reacting to learning that nikolai had a kid sister (the reader)

Notes:heyy! :D It’s okey, i love writing requests for the doa! Anyway.. i founded this request so cute!💙 Oh and sorry if i’m late, I had to post your request last night but then came the bsd trailer and I couldn’t resist the temptation to watch it and make me simp about the fact that Nikolai was finally animated!😥i mean, NIKOLAI IS SO GOD DAMN FINE. 😩🙏

TW/CONTENT: sfw, fem!reader, Fyodor and Sigma interacting with the reader as nikolai young sister, platonic ‘relationship’

Sigma

at first he was quite surprised that Nikolai could have a younger sister

If it wasn’t for Nikolai talking about you all the time, he probably wouldn’t have even suspected he had a little sister

The first time you met was a bit..particular:Nikolai had a night mission with Fyodor and just didn’t want to leave you home alone. God forbid anything bad ever happens to you... or you mess something or someone up, without him. I believe in Nikolai and his little sister creating problems together supremacy

Now a quiz! Guess who was the only reliable person Nikolai could trust at that moment to leave his lovely little sister in his hands? That’s right! Sigma.

At first Sigma was not inclined to babysit you but in one way or another Nikolai convinced him

One has to admit that at first there was embarrassment, Sigma is not very good with children.

'I am the menager of a major casino, not a babysitter! I swear as soon as I see Nikolai- '

".... Oh- hem-... Do you want cookies?." That was the first sentence he said to you after a strangely awkward moments of silence.

The situation is improving little by little. Go from monosyllabic answers to answers with whole sentences, laughter, and a few lines.

You spent the night getting Sigma to teach you how to play cards and to hear stories from Sigma about his, Nikolai’s and Fyodor’s missions.

As soon as you fell asleep sigma’s heart melted, you were so pretty!!

He can’t believe that a lovely little girl like you is related to an annoying, crazy guy like Nikolai

Once the mission ended, of course, Nikolai came back to pick you up early in the morning. You were still sleeping, so he used his cape as a blanket and picked you up

Sigma was kind of sad to let you go and not even say goodbye

"As soon as she wakes up, tell her I said hello, okey?"

Since that morning, he’s offered to babysit you every time Nikolai had a night mission to do.

Let’s also say that, after that night, you also started winning several times when you and your brother played cards

Fyodor

This man is always informed, so he would probably already know about you before Nikolai even told him about you

Every once in a while, he would ask of you just to start a conversation with Kolia: "So, how is your little sister?" Thanks to Nikolai’s gab, he found out things about you that he wasn’t even interested in knowing truthfully, but hey, better more information than less

He never planned to meet you but ops! one day Nikolai had urgent things to do and Fyodor was the only one available, even if against his initial will, to take care of you:

"Hey Dos-kun! Listen, I have an urgent duty, can you watch my little sister while I’m gone?"

"Nikolai, I don’t have t-"

"Thank you, I knew I could count on you Dos-kun!! take care of Y/N byeee!"

And that’s how you were left alone with Fyodor.

At the beginning there was an unnerving silence, the only noise that was heard was that of Fyodor’s fingers writing on the computer keyboard

At first you were silent, without making any noise, after all Fyodor can have a threatening aura from time to time.

After a while, however, you remembered that he was your brother’s dearest friend, your young infant brain thought to make friends with him

You started asking them questions with a fairly confident voice

Fyodor was a little surprised, usually children are afraid of him, why with you is different? but then he remembered that after all you’re related to Nikolai

After starting a decent conversation with you he realized that he would not be able to continue his work if you kept talking to him, so he decided to put the pc aside for a moment

He was strangely happy that a child is not afraid of him

He was surprised when after he smiled at you, you smiled back and didn’t cry or tremble with fear

When you started asking questions about his work, however, he had to stop you, better that a child does not know these things: "I will tell you when you are older mh?"

When you asked him about his bookstore and what kind of books they were, he was more than happy to explain it to you.

You spent the rest of your time with him reading you a book while you listened to him with admiration and attention. (childhood crush??🤔)

But then your brother came back for you

You were sad, at least you wanted Fyodor to finish reading the story!

Unfortunately, Nikolai said that he was so tired and that you had to go home.

You took Nikolai’s hand as you walked away from Fyodor "Bye-bye." You greeted him with a sad tone of voice

"Ow sunshine, so you make me feel guilty though!" Nikolai said to you being a drama queen.

"Don’t worry, Nikolai, I’ll finish reading the story next time we meet," Fyodor replied

'next time'? so there will be a next time!! You were so happy to hear those words!

You turned to Fyodor: "S-so, are we friends now Mr. Dostoevskij?"

"Of course we are malýshka, and please call me Fyodor." He answered, crouching at your height and stroking your head

Aw, you were so happy and adorable in that moment, even Fyodor’s heart could have melted!😭

Nikolai in all this was amazed at how the situation had evolved between the two of you- it almost seemed that you 'loved' Fyodor more than him:

"i’m sorry Dos-kun but she’s my sister.😁💢"

"I know, I was just waving"

"Then can you try not to steal her from me? You know, I could commit a homicide-"

"Nikolai! not in front of the child."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------ That's it! i hope you liked it!💙💙

sooo,i made a pt.2 of this! here 💙

#bsd anime #bsd fyodor #bsd nikolai gogol #bsd sigma #bungo stray dogs x reader #bsd manga #blueberry writer #sfw #platonic relationships

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kingofthehilltoday · 2 years

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If you were given the chance to rewrite the entirety of King of the Hill, starting with the pilot episode, what would you do differently?

Give it a full story. One that can't just be aired in no particular order.

I think id have that episode where Hank begins working at the co-op even earlier and stretch it over an entire ark, having it help grow and change him more. Itd probably be after the mega-lo-mart ark. Which i think should have been more important to the overall story. Hank saw firsthand what mega-lo-mart (wal-mart in the real world) was doing to businesses. Driving out all the small fish and then upping its prices up once it has no competition. Yet later on he just forgives mega-lo because they no longer carry propane. It shouldn't have ended there and hank shouldn't have forgiven them, he almost developed ptsd around his whole livelihood. Also he should learn about fracking and rethink his whole stance on propane, I know he's all about propane and propane accessories but I think it'd be an amazingly interesting internal struggle. Buck Strickland will die pretty early on also <3

Peggy would have her own storyline where she actually has to learn Spanish, and bobby would mostly be dealing with bullies at school.

Dale would stumble upon an actual gov plot. Nothing too big or even really that important and it's just something going on with Arlen's local gov, but something he wants to get to the bottom of and he feels only he can do. Something like that snake episode except it's again like a full ark. Maybe it's just something like the mayor charges ten cents more for the parking meters and is pocketing that additional money himself.

Id have Bill leave the army in 2001, maybe even go AWOL and has to find some way to avoid the government while dale is constantly getting into trouble with it causing bill to have to hide a lot and struggling with depression and his missing Lenore.

Boomhauer would have an ark similar to that girl who dumped him but it would be more dramatic and shit. And he would under no circumstances be a cop.

Nancy's story would remain mostly unchanged.

Redcorn would never renege and try to sleep w Nancy again, but also id do more w him than have him try to open a casino in Texas (how did he not know that casinos weren't allowed in Texas??? He lives here??) Id show more of his relationship with Candy and his Daughter. He literally has a kid in the show who can know of him as a father, id like to see Redcorn actually act like a father to her.

Kahn and Minh would probably get divorced when Minh joins dales gun club. Like, Minh can be a very sweet person when Kahn isn't around and I'd like to see that explored. Also I'd like Connie to catch a break and not be pushed so hard to do things she doesn't want to. I dont think Connie and Bobby will stay together and that storyline will stay mostly in tact although it may happen at a different time than his 13th, but it was a good place to put it.

Cotton Hill's story would remain relatively the same, the portrayal of "honored veterans" is very important. This country loves to talk about how much it respects the troops but the second one is on the verge of homelessness they get abandoned.

Hank and Peggy /would/ have a second kid after seeing cotton and deedee have one and that storyline would be important too, when cotton dies (finally) they would adopt GH, and then we'd get to see Bobby be a good big brother to two siblings.

Also the characters would for sure age. Maybe not super fast, maybe every couple of seasons. But I want them to be older and more mature by the end of the series. I know this was more like an out of chronological order list of things that would happen but I think it'd be fun if there was a slightly more mature angle to some of the story telling in between hijinks and funny jokes.

And finally id also have Saul Goodman (or a Saul Goodman stand in) be a character. He would absolutely be dale's lawyer and he would have to work his ass off to get Dale out of trouble sometimes

#king of the hill #koth #hank hill #dale gribble #peggy hill

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thegeminisage · 7 months

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tng night SIGH number four. tonight's eps were uhhh [checks] "lonely among us" and "justice." verdict: idk, i kept getting bored and looking at my phone

"lonely among us" was about a little electric thing that kept hopping bodies. this was initially kind of fun, if stupid, because it seemed SO OBVIOUS that crusher should report missing time right away and she just didn't lol

i do like that deanna finally got something to do (hypnotizing them) but it just made me remember that in tos they werent allowed to do that and this hypnotism could have been an email (vulcan mind meld). i'll get there. i just miss him.

the aliens who wanted to eat live animals were like. unfunny. especially when menacing tasha yar. idk, she always looks incredibly tense and it's starting to make me feel bad for her. she seems to hate everything. poor ms whoever is playing her

data's bit with the sherlock pipe was kinda cringe but i love him anyway. i was VERY mad when picard told him to knock it off. you're stopping him from stimming!!! leave him alone!!! also, in the next episode, he got onto him about babbling and watching data shut down in response was SOOO sad jail for picard for ONE THOUSAND YEARS im glad his ass apologized

unfortunately during the middle of the pipe thing is when i found out about the loz movie via destiel meme (ep was boring i was looking at my phone sorry) so i ruined the best part of the episode for myself

i am coming to understand that generally speaking data is the best part of any given tng episode <3

there was a moment in this episode where wesley was once again right and told to buzz off. in the next episode he does something stupid and they spend the entire time defending him. i DONT understand why it always has to be like this. i don't even dislike wesley, i just dislike the way the other characters are written is reponse to him. he's like the theo teenwolf of tng (dont get me started)

big moment in this ep was the potential mutiny. once again it's too early for this shit. i wanted some episodes where they explore planets and fight some guys (like the ferengi ep!) before we did anything deep. i bet if this happened in like seasons 3-5 i'd be beside myself about it the way i was when it almost happened in tos. but i don't like some of these guys yet, let alone care deeply about them (except data, who is my best friend).

next ep: The Sex Planet. once again, it is inappropriate to be having children on a starship, but it is especially inappropriate to send your fifteen year old """honorary""" """""ensign"""""" down to a planet that you don't know anything about except how they LOVE to fuck. the greeting party literally didn't even know what to do with him if they couldn't feel him up. he had to explain in 1987 hays code that he was a fucking virgin. maybe some research besides "they love to fuck here" would have helped with this situation but also "let's not send the 15yo to the brothel planet" would be a good line of thought too???

anyway he breaks the law has to die and theyre twisting themselves into knots over the prime directive and the setup was ACTUALLY almost interesting except they just beamed away with him in the end without finding a third option, which they could have done like 20 minutes in. also, if theyre trying not to break the prime directive, why are they allowed to tell the aliens they're from space and beam one aboard their ship? like, i actually love ethical questions posed by the prime directive, so this episode is cool on paper, but the execution flopped

oh i nearly forgot worf was bragging about his prowess in bed and how he was too much for weak human partners and riker looked SO intrigued which was like the funniest fucking thing. good for both of them. also it was androidphobia that they didn't let data go to that planet to get laid

anyway, as of now, i have been OFFICIALLY DITCHED. catherine maulthots has decided to let me do s1 and s2 of tng on my OWN and then show her the relevant ones so it's time to watch this shit on 2x speed until i hit the good parts

#personal #star trek blogging #tng lb #i miss spock. and bones and kirk ofc but mostly just spock

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watatsumiis · 11 months

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ro ro ro ro

🎤🛡💔 for whichever (or all) of your genshin men <3

*bites you (/aff) and runs*

CHASES YOU DOWN AND BITES YOU BACK. RRRAAAAGH /aff /pos

ramblies below the cut awooo!!!

🎤: Describe your f/o’s voice

Ayato - His voice is a very soft blue with white cloud shaped spots throughout but with the texture of perfectly misted water. but theres also a little stream of water running along the underside. kind of a vaguely round-ish shape but also not. im imagining the shape of moving water when katara is waterbending in atla ? its very cold but not Bad cold, like.. like leaving the house early on a spring morning and taking in a big breath of that cold crisp air

Capitano - a deep deep navy blue, with very dark brown/almost black-grey sort of .. rocklike shapes along the bottom, but lighter blue upside down droplets near the top. theres also a sort of light to dark gradient descending with the blue ? its kind of shaped like a big rounded scale. a very tough texture but also sort of soft in a way? like touching a big snake

Zhongli - kind of like the texture of a big big gemstone thats been sliced in half, smooth but theres lines through it, you touch it and its warm, its mostly a deep brown but the gradient sort of fades to a similar amber colour to his eyes. but when hes speaking softly its like... soft, but not too soft. not mink but like that soft thats almost.. sticky feeling? it comes in like little clumps. it looks like the scales butterflies have on their wings, its whats on the inside of those oodies?

🛡: Who’s the more protective one?

Ayato - I think we're both very protective towards one another but in different senses. he's the 'traditionally' protective one, who is always going out of his way to make sure I'm staying out of trouble and not around anyone shady, but I like to look after him and make sure he's taking care of his own needs and isn't being overworked (even if that means coming up with an excuse to get him out of a meeting that has run way too long). I'm the guy standing behind him giving people the stink eye when they try to give him extra paperwork

Capitano - It's him. there's no doubt about it. he's protector coded through and through, to him I am just this pathetic little sopping wet pomeranian puppy fresh out of the washing machine with shaky little legs that needs to be kept on a tight leash or else I'll get myself crazy murdered. which hes probably right for that. i couldnt see myself surviving long around people like the fatui. im too impulsive, id probably get offered a beaker of glowstick juice from a dottore clone and gulp it down without thinking. though im definitely protective of him to an extent too (as much as i can be), fretting over him being sent into dangerous situations or having to work too much, that kind of thing.

Zhongli - it's him. without a doubt. im just a fragile squishy little human, he's an archon. he probably frets much more than he needs to and does lots of little things to subtly guide me away from things i shouldnt be getting into. i am my own biggest danger most of the time because i'm pretty clumsy and sometimes struggle to look after myself. id worry over him a lot, but he's probably pretty good at practicing self care so my worries dont have a lot of merit to them. he likes to let me feel like im helping though <3

💔: Is it hard being away from each other?

Ayato - For him, yes. Not so much for me. He spends a lot of time working and so I'd be pretty used to him not giving me much attention and the like, but I know I'll have his full attention when he does have time for me. but he likes the reassurance that he hasn't been forgotten about or isn't being ignored, so he gets kind of antsy if i don't visit him often enough, or tell thoma to say i said hi when he brings ayato his cups of tea <3

Capitano - Not particularly. We're both very introverted and benefit from alone time - I'd imagine a lot of our time spent 'together' is just.. alone time, in the same vicinity as one another. like parallel play. He'll be cooking in the kitchen while I'm sitting nearby reading a book, or he'll do some gardening when i'm out on the porch drawing or writing! Of course, we'd miss each other a lot, but I'd imagine we're separated a lot thanks to his work, so we've found our own ways to cope, and are careful not to become too reliant on one another. but id definitely miss his cooking and his cuddles (sob)

Zhongli - I think it depends. I'd get sort of used to having Zhongli around me very often, and having someone to direct my questions and observations towards, so him not being there would be super noticeable for me, and I think he'd probably feel at least somewhat similarly. We'd find ourselves turning to talk to someone that isn't there beside us and craving for someone else's company, but nobody else feels quite right. I'd imagine his loneliness gets a lot worse during the Lantern Rite season or on death anniversaries, when all the old emotions are being dredged back up - he'd sort of instinctively draw away a bit to grieve because he doesn't want me to see him all sad, but that in turn would make me sad because i miss him and would feel like id done something wrong :((

#asks #general barks #ogh that last one is giving me angsty fic ideas #self ship tag #thanks so much for the ask!!!!! yaps excitedly

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froggieco · 1 year

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PLEASE DONT SCROLL!

(UPDATED)

This is my boy Charlie

If you give me your ear I'd like to tell you his story.

I found Charlie at a shelter in 2019 and I fell in love right away. As I was getting to know him the workers told me that he had come and gone from the shelter often, the most recent time coming back from a family with small children who tormented him. On the white patch on his chest there was a blue stain from a sucker that was stuck to him. One of his previous owners had claimed he was so aggressive that they completely declawed him. This poor baby had been picked up and dumped in 7 years. Needless to say I couldn't leave him there.

When I brought him home he was extremely skittish, not wanting to interact with anyone and hiding under my bed basically for 3 days. But it didn't discourage me, I sat on my floor putting food and water where he could get it and just calmly talking to him about anything. By the night of the third day he ended up jumping up on my bed and laying by me. Anytime I moved he would tense but eventually we both fell asleep.

It took a long time to build his trust but 4 years later and we have an unbreakable bond. Every second it took to build was worth more then I can imagine. It's cliche but it was really him who saved me.

The last year he's been having some weird behaviors, the most blatant one is peeing everywhere. I mean everywhere. He peened on beds, clothes, the carpet, just about anywhere but the litter box. I took him to the vet right away and found he had a UTI. Great, I can take care of that with antibiotics! But after he finished them he was still peeing outside the litter box. I thought then that maybe it was the stress of having two new dogs in the house, something behavioral. I did everything, got special litter, picking everything up, got hormone therapy, anxiety meds, spending extra time with him. Everything. None of it was working and I was at a complete loss. I had him checked for another UTI but it came back clear. Eventually I took him to a different vet and asked for a complete blood check because I knew something was wrong.

It turned out something was wrong. Charlie has diabetes. When I tell you I was heartbroken for taking so long to figure it out, thinking it was behavioral, thinking it was nothing but a UTI... words don't describe how guilty I feel. But I'm glad I caught it early, before I found him in keto acidosis. I'm very blessed

The only issue is I am in a horrible financial situation. I'm barely making by and a lot of the time I can't afford groceries. I never let this stop me from giving the best care to my pets, in fact that's where most of my time and money goes to (other then my own medical expenses as I have many disabilities). Instantly I knew I needed help affording insulin for him.

That's why I'm here. I have a GoFundMe that I will use to save up enough for a year of insulin. If I could get a year I'm hoping I can get out of my issue and save up enough to be able to afford it myself. I know it's a lot, I know it's a long shot but I'm hoping for a miracle. I know many people won't be able to donate but even if you just share this, I will be eternally grateful.

If you've made it this far, thank you so so much. Thank you for listening to me and I hope this is able to reach the people who can help me take care of my baby boy

PLEASE SHARE 💙

!!UPDATE!!

Hello everyone, I thought I would make an updated fundraiser as well as give more information to what I have learned over the year since making my original fundraiser.

Charlie is in heart failure. I still haven't accepted this, even while looking up treatments and seeing the life expectancy. I'm stretched thin with his diabetes treatment and I'm not sure what any heart treatments would be. He is my old man now, 11 years old and still has a car engine purr. This fundraiser is for insulin for a year, which I'm hoping to make the best year of his life.

I want to thank everyone who even took the time to read this, it truly means the world to me.

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thebigfudanshi · 9 months

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TRAUMA RANT

I always wonder why ive been dissociating since January, and why my mental health is so fucked, and why I'm so anxious, and why I have zero social skills, and why I'm so lonely and sad and hurting all the time and pretty much resorting to one person nymphomania...

And then the one time I try to speak my mind for once, my true, honest mind. I don't even know who I am, but I was trying. I love my dog so much, and it hurts me to the core whenever SHE just can't seem to see it. My dog is a person, she is a BABY. Dogs will not bend to your will because you hit them. And she hasn't thank god, but god does she threaten to sometimes. If I have to hear one more time that if my dog slips out of her harness that's she's gonna be put down I'm gonna HURT HER BEACAUSE I ALREADY LOOST A DOG THIS YEAR AND IT STILL HASNT SUNK IN AND SHE GOT RID OF OUR OTHER TWO DOGS BECAUSE SHE DIDNT WANNA TRAIN THEM ANYMORE. it's not hard to give a dog a treat and tell her to sit so she doesn't jump on you, but SHE has to keep insisting she can't walk around with treats. GO FUCKING GRAB ONE ITS NOT HARD. SHES NOT GONNA STOP JUMPING ON YOU IF YOU DONT GIVE HER A TREAT, POODLES ARE GOAL MOTIVATED!

so yeah, I spoke my honest mind to HER just fifteen minutes ago. I just got out of a whimpering sobbing fit beacause of HER. So I'm just, downstairs, yeah? First of all, I'm greeted to not a hello, never. I was greeted to HER coming up to me to complain a out a flea on her this morning. And yeah, i really do get it, nothing against being told that. I told HER I'd give Phoebe a bath cause I was already thinking of it. Fine and dandy.

I come into the laundry room. SHE follows to do laundry. I get Phoebe ready to go outside because she has to wear underwear cause she went into heat early before we could get her spayed. She's jumping on HER. SHE is complaining about the jumping. It stops after a moment and after I keep telling her to sit. She doesn't, but she stops.

I tell HER for the third(?) Instance this week that "Phoebe would probably sit more if you got a treat and told her to sit." And SHE rounds at me like "*Complaining complaining* I don't walk around with a pocket full of treats." And I'm like, sputtering, just a tad taken aback and I tell HER "they're on top of the fridge" barely 15 feet from us. She says nothing as she leaves. Phoebe doesn't go outside but it's an oh well cause she didn't eat yet.

I go inside. I make something to eat. As I sit down to wait for it, HER girlfriend, N, who I have no qualms with even though it might sound like it. So N asks me if Phoebe needs a new harness, because she's had two recent issues with slipping out. I say yeah, presenting that she slipped out on a walk recently. We continue by briefly talking about how's she's been slipping out. I say we probably should get her harness fixed, beacause I have to train Phoebe with strangers by giving strangers treats to have her sit and then get pet when she's sitting. And that she would definitely tackle a kid if she got loose and saw one because my dog ADORES my toddler nieces.

SHE chimes in by saying "you know if she gets loose-" and I cut her off, because I've heard where it's going before. Rude as it was, but the family kinda talks over eachother anyway. "Yeah, I know, she's gonna get put down." And SHES like "NO. She could get put down and they could sue ME. I don't know why youre getting like "I know."

And I'm sitting there dumbfounded, with my dog sitting two feet from me. Saying like, "I value my dog's life more than money???" And SHE starts backtracking all offended I said something back like "I do too, but..." And then SHE scoffs. I talk to N a little more but my attention is on HER when SHE huffs and says "I'm gonna go smoke." Like I stressed HER out by speaking my mind and she walked past me to the basement and shut the door with more force than was needed. Im sitting there with my hotpocket folding the damn thing, and I look at N, who isn't doing anything, and Im jawdropped like, wtf. So I just go over to my dog, i tap her side so she gets up and goes to the stairs where I reside %99 of my days, and as I'm leaving I'm muttering trying to get N to hear me like "alright, can't even speak my mind in this house, okay." Cause this has been an issue for YEARS. So I take my mad ass upstairs, and as soon as I get halfway to my room I'm sobbing.

Normally I wouldn't post something like this for my SOUL. But I literally can't talk to anyone about this because the problem lives in my house and I'm gonna forget this like the rest of my life. MY MOM STORMED OFF LIKE A TEENAGER. ill be all fine and dandy by tomorrow because my mom's gonna ignore it even happened like EVERYTHING, and I'm just gonna be the bad guy in her head. I'm fine with that. But I'm really not. Y'know? She's just sitting down there now. Completely fine. When I'M NOT. Thanks.

Thanks for listening to my Trauma-Talk

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ace-mob-boss · 1 year

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I am so undeniably overwhelmed at all times no matter what it looks like I'm doing because it's never what I should be. My productivity hours are 11-3 and 5-7, but thats when im supposed to fucking sleep.

And I wanna work out more like, fr before i end up killing myself over my weight on some dumb shit. I don't wanna get to that point but I'm getting worse and worse at communication, i use to just leave it be when i hurt someone on accident and they get mad vcus i apologized and it was an accident and now i sit there biting my knuckles like "FUCK! FUCK. FUCK" every time.

anyways, my communication skills are so bad and i would go to the gym or on walks for a couple hours everyday if I could simply do it alone and dictate my own routine. not my moms.

The ellipitical makes me wanna tear my fucking hair out when someone else TELLS me to do it.

I should get substantially better at getting work done now that i have headphones though, people dont understand that i actually am very bad at getting work done when im not listeniing to music, especially when considering that not only does it help me concentrate but when im listening to music i often try to mainly type, but also write, to the beat. i might tap my fingers along to and throw them out in a flappy kinda way. kinda like when you do explosions with your hands but in a more coordinated way, at least, coordinated to me.

Regardless, without music im shit at concentrating, especially in english. part of the reason my english skills have deteriorated so badly regardless of my high ass reading level, skills and comprehension, because I am officially on college level reading since last year according to the state, I can't pay attention to books in class for the most part. If I start before everyone else adn am left uninterrupted I will annotate on my own and read the whole thing. The problem comes up when they stop letting me do that or they start making other students read a loud. Like, my stupid ass englissh teacher make me take my heapdhone out one time, for no reason when i was actively reading my text and ahead of the class, which i then stopped working cus not only was i now bored as shit, but she also had students reading aloud when they didn't even know the words with a MICROPHONE.

Anyways, i got off track, it went downhill in 8th grade where i literally almost failed english because of the damn school. So usually, since like, 2nd grade where i would do entire hw packets in the beginning of the year, i would start reading the book early or read ahead of where everyone else was. I often got in trouble for it but for years and years, I'd even borrow the books without being seen which was against the rules no matter how safe you were, and I'd read at home or in school. If I don't read ahead I don't pay attention. I dont know how it works but whenever im on the same pace as others i either quickly fall behind because i usually answer questions more extensively then asked or i get stuck rereading the same page, who know why. But in 8th grade they didn't want me doing that and so they would keep the book name a secret, explicitly said to stop me on multiple occasicons from buying and reading the book early. Then they would also send me a copy late/last in the class so i couldnt read ahead. then they wondered how i was failing when they've SEEN the pattern in which i always read the book ahead on purpose.

Anyways, fuck english, it's my worst subject. ON another note. i keep letting my room get dirty even though it bothers me for some reason. it just piles on and on until i force myself to clean it. Also, i am depressed. I don't care if my mom tries to say i just heard it off the internet. I am better than i was before but sometimes i simply cannot gain the will power to do things. Sometimes i ponder my existence in the world as everything goes to shit. and sometimes i just really hate myself. But, it's still better than before. Because while i dont attempt to be a pick me, it is simply something that i accept and try my best to go against. But it isnt just internet influence. I use to ponder for weeks on end with no sleep on different ways to kill myself. which would be less painful and which would be fast. I'd be in the car with family staring at the window, thinking of how i should die. One time i didn't sleep for 6 days straight, how i kept functioning is a fucking miracle. i only went to sleep when i started hallucinating shit in the corner. And yet when my parents learned about me saying i had depression, mind you i only spoke about this with other people who also had depression, both diagnosed and not, they were simply disssapointed in me.

Anyways, i have no clue how i got to this point. My room is hot, my mother has put a plastic film on top of my ac to stop the draft from "freezing the house out" regardless of it being known that my fathers side of the family is constantly hot. including me. and because of fucking global warming, which could be easily ficed if it wasn't for how naturally greed ridden humanity is, it's not even touching, under 45 degrees like it use to even though we're nearing the peak of winter. I also have a fuck ton of squishmallows and blankets which are usually very comfirtable but right now its hot as all hell so im burningm up even with my window open. Another reason is that for year my building has no heat until my mom finally sued the land lord early this year/late last year and they fixed it except for the fact that it is hot as balls now. Both buildings are burning up somehow.

Anyways, my little cousin also like fanfiction right, usually we read weird shit in funny voices as a joke and giggle and laugh. she's three, almost two, years younger than me. I often hang out with her and she obviously the favorite cousin after the chromebook i just bought her for christmas this year. so all of us had a sleepover recently and she was obviously tired and my other cousin was asleep while me and a NOTHER seperate cousin were on the bed.so she was talking about how quiet it was and i laughed and said its cus this is usuallyt the time me and the tired cousin start reading weird shit and giggling but shes tired so i wont. mind you i havent read anything with her in the past like, 1 and a half months on the days i seen her and she had just spent the whole day with me walking around the city to an art gallery unlike all the other cousins. And she just pops up talking baout how oh thats so good and all that shi and i was like, i just said we not doing that cus your tired and i didnt even read any with you today, yesterday, or two days before that when i also saw you and multiple times before that. and shes just gonna go "yeah i know bur you always read fanfiction with me everytime i see you and i was just with you all day" and im not gonna act like i wasnt hurt because i dont know anyone else who reads fanfiction that isn't x reader which i personally just dont like in any way, i think its kinda weird but i leave people who do read it be. but she somehow failed to mention the fact that she is often the one to choose to do that to begin with and just has me read them. but regardless it hurt my feelings and it truly made me feel like shit. cus now in my head im just like, oh. i just make her feel uncomfortable dont i. i cant explain the whole feeling but part of it was kinda like betrayal and it just really fucked me up cus that was two and and a half days ago and i still feel fucking bad.

Then on a whole nother note. my parents got a divorce and while im glad for it cus we live in the same apartment with my mom. im also pissed. my dad left and he texted me the other day in a way that was actively trying to seek attention and guilt me. but thats not even the problem. I haven't loved my father in years right. he constantly made jokes about it and everyone in the family knew this. he also was hella rude to my mother. threatening her and shi but never truly acting. overall just disrespectful. but ive never out right told him i dont like him. until the day my mom officiated this shit show when she came back from vacay and had me wait in the car. afterwards. she told him, cus he was lying and saying that me and my brother said we were fine with living with him and having her visit, that why would i ever agree to that when i dont even like him, like being around him, or like tlaking to him. in which he then called me and she told me i have to tell him the truth and say yes. now she keeps fucking bothering me about having to talk to him about why i dont like him like im legally required to involve myself with HIS healing process and stress myself out over his feelings. Every fucking day its something baout having to talk to him and how shes gonna instigate a convo with him but i dont wanna fucking do that. and she keeps saying/acting like it's out of cowardly reasons that i dont want to but its not because i truly fear him. It is because he stresses me out and bothers me. He annoys me on all levels and when im overwhelmed i cry. He pisses me off and acts like I'm stupid, undermining me and my intelligence while also acting like a damn narcissist who's simultaneously done no wrong. I do not fear him. He angers me. i dont want to talk to him because of the potential stress, not out of mere cowardice.

anyways, i have plenty more to say cus im just venting remotely everything right now because since most of my friends suck fucking ass and the ones who i do talk to aren't ones i'd like to talk about this to without feeling as if im bothering them, ill leave it be. not that theyre bad friends, but, there are different friends that tolerate different things and react in different ways. I think im going to go to sleep now though considering that i just wrote for a hot 35 minutes and it is 4:30 in the morning and i have so much i want to do.

#suicide mention #school #overwhelmed #overall just bullshit im not gone hold you

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