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hunnylagoon · 4 months

Text

Right Where You Left Me

Pt 4: The Sweetest Thing to Ever Scare You (Finale)

Ellie Williams x reader

I remember when I first saw you. I remember looking into your warm almond eyes and feeling butterflies in my stomach. But soon, when I looked into your eyes, I no longer felt the same warmth that I once knew. It felt as though you had killed all of the butterflies inside my stomach but yet, I still loved you.

Premise: You and Ellie are childhood best friends until you drift apart. Funny thing about soulmates is they tend to find their way back to each other. You and Ellie try to end the tireless war between you.

Warnings: Angst / drinking / violence / not really religious mentions in this one

Part one here!

Part two here!

Part three over here!

Guys I thought I posted this two days ago but I actually just saved it to drafts. Sorry for being an idiot lmao

I think that I have unlearned how to love.

That’s not even a word but there is no other way to tell you that I have turned myself cold.

Without partying to distract me and religion to fill in gaps of emptiness, I isolate myself and begin to write once again. I'm almost certain that my body has been telling me to write, that I need to pour myself into art as opposed to a girl I was friends with a million years ago.

I figure that I need to create rather than destroy but it might take me a while to do so.

The morning after I abandoned my faith on the church floor, I had woken up and expected Ellie to be gone, however, she was wide awake and playing subway surfers on her phone. Her hair is messy and her eyes are half-lidded.

She turns to look at me when she feels the shuffling of the bedsheets; despite her doing nothing more than smile at me it is like an understanding passed between us, war is over.

Almost.

It's like I've forgotten how to be soft, I can't manage to get the words out that I need to, and the thought of it alone makes me cringe. "Breakfast?" I ask, unsure of what else to say.

Ellie passes on it and I awkwardly excuse myself, saying that I got called in to take a brunch shift at work. Of course, this is not true. What I do is get into my car and drive and drive until I get mad at myself for burning gas.

The war between Ellie and I had ended but it didn't register in my head, I almost fell in love with it. Without the constant arguing and passive aggressiveness, there was nothing to put a wall between us and I wasn't ready to be vulnerable again.

So I begin to feed Ellie the ugliest parts of me; I show her everything I'm sure she will hate but she doesn't, she's patient and shows me the kindness I have been looking everywhere for. Still, I am cold to her, I don't know what else to do.

I try to push her away all over again but this time, she doesn't let me. Ellie comes into my room when I'm studying to sit on my bed so that she can be in proximity to me. Sometimes she'll ask me if I want to go for a walk or a late-night gas station run, all of the things we used to do.

When I'm angry at her, she lets it happen, she won't escalate the fight all she does is apologize and does what she can to fix it. Everything feels like it's in order again, Joel even starts to send me little text messages to check in on me and sends me Facebook memes that make him think of me.

As of now, we are setting up for Dina's twenty-first birthday. The living room, typically a space for casual gatherings and movie nights, had undergone a transformation. Vibrant streamers adorned the walls, and an array of balloons in assorted hues scattered themselves along the floor "Are balloons too childish?" Abby asks as she walks out of her bedroom.

"They better not be after I just spent half an hour doing all of these," Cat answers, giving her a scornful glare.

"They look great, Cat," I smile and give her a thumbs-up from where I am in the kitchen dumping bags of chips into bowls. "Should I make a veggie platter?"

Cat furrows her eyebrows "If you can finish it by yourself, sure."

"Cat, we aren't children, adults eat vegetables," Abby takes a seat on the couch behind Cat, investigating the hard work she's put into making the living room look nice for just one night "Isn't it weird that Dina is organizing her own surprise party?"

I shrug, placing a wooden cutting board down on the kitchen counter "I don't blame her, I don't think we've always been one hundred percent reliable, me specifically."

"But it's not a surprise if she knows about it."

"So?" Cat asks.

"So why are we calling it a surprise party if it isn't a surprise?"

"Why not?"

"Well, why can't we just call it a party?"

"I don't think it matters," I cut in, I begin to peel carrots and slice them up into quarters. Ellie comes out of her bedroom, she took a nap after completing her physics presentation, her hair in a messy bun, and she's in her typical pyjama uniform of sweats and a hoodie. "Hey, Ellie," I smile at her.

She rubs some sleep away from her green eyes "Hey," Ellie walks over to the kitchen island where I slice and chop vegetables and sits right in front of me. Even half asleep she looks like a statue of marble carved by a skilled hand.

Abby raises an eyebrow, asking 'When did you guys become friends?' without saying it and then it hits me like the plane in Lost. Ellie still hasn't told anyone about our history, our sixteen years of friendship is invisible to the eyes of those who think they know us well.

I'm broken from my thoughts when Abby speaks up "When are you picking up the cake?"

My heart drops "I'm not?"

Cat and Abby cast one another side glances while Ellie snatches a cucumber off my cutting board "Dina was handing out duties and you said you would take care of the cake."

I freeze, unsure of what to say "Nuh-uh." I shake my head like a child denying blame for breaking her mother's favourite dish.

"Yuh-huh," Cat shoots back. "How could you forget that?"

My mind fumbles for an excuse and somehow I land on "I forgot because I went temporarily insane from Lyme disease," What am I saying? "I got Lyme disease because I go camping in secret," I don't camp "And I never told you guys that I go camping because I'm deeply ashamed of it."

Now everyone looks perpetually confused, Ellie included "What are you talking about?" Abby asks, her eyebrows furrowed.

"Okay-well," I place my knife flat on the counter by the wooden cutting board, ignoring the odd spiel I just went on "I'm going to drive to-

"You dropped your car off for a suspension repair yesterday," Abby reminds me.

"Ellie is going to drive me to get a cake," I correct myself "I will be back to finish making my veggie plate." I quickly rinse my hands before grabbing Ellie's keys from the little jewelry dish on the island and yank the sleeve of her hoodie to pull her along.

Ellie doesn't say anything, she slips into some Crocs and we walk outside to her car. "Where are we headed?"

"Uh, hang on," In Ellie's passenger seat, I go on Google Maps to look up the closest bakeries that are still open at this hour, there are two, one a couple of streets away and the other one is across town and closing in twenty minutes. "Infectious Confections," I wrinkle my nose "That's a weird fucking name."

While Ellie tries to make conversation in the car I only speak when giving her directions to the bakery. She knows something is up and I can tell by the way she keeps glancing at me. I just can't manage to get it out of my head that she's still keeping me a secret.

She pulls up to the bakery and I get out before she even turns her car off, she pulls the keys out of the ignition and trails behind me through the doors.

The bakery itself was rustic and clean, there were two display cases and tills one of the displays held danishes, croissants, cookies, scones and whatever those little swirly flakey things are called. The other display had a big chalk menu above it that read 'Cakery' Though what was in the display case was very sparse.

"Hi," I walk up to the till, putting on the friendly smile and customer service voice that I usually only use at work. "This is pretty short notice but I was wondering if you had any cakes left or if I could get one made for today?"

The guy behind the counter is a scrawny teenager who looks like he has had a long enough day of dealing with annoying customers "We close in half an hour, there's not enough time to bake and decorate a cake." He explains it like he's said this to a million people, he's bored of the same phrases that his manager has scripted out for him.

"Any shot that someone didn't pick up their cake?" I ask, fingers crossed in the hope that he says yes.

"Let me talk to my manager," His voice drags on, and he turns around and disappears through a commercial kitchen door. I wait patiently, hands balled together in front of me as I rock back and forth on my heels. A minute or two later he comes back holding a bright blue cake with pink detailing of bows and mustaches, there's text on it that reads 'It's a...' gender reveal cake. "This is all we have left, they cancelled last minute.

I look back at Ellie to get her opinion, her eyebrows are furrowed slightly "Maybe we good just get some of those cupcakes and smush them together and smear the icing so it looks like a cake."

I wave her off "I'll buy it," I say this only because it is 5:41 and with each passing minute I am growing desperate, also I don't want Jesse to be disappointed that I fumbled the cake and ruined his girlfriend's birthday.

Angsty teenager puts the bright blue monstrosity into a cake box and charges me an absurd total for it, I bitterly tap my card on the machine.

As I walk back out to Ellie's car I take a brief moment to look at the sky, it's the same hue as cotton candy and looks as if it had been projected from a watercolour painting, even after I get back into the car and Ellie begins to blast her old dad rock songs, I can't tear my eyes away from it.

After five minutes of silence from my end, Ellie finally asks the question that's been burning into the forefront of her brain "Why are you being weird?"

"Why haven't you told anyone that we met before we moved in together?"

Her dark eyebrows furrow "You haven't told anyone either-

"Yes, I have."

"Who?"

"Yara, Stacy, Kayla, Mitch, Nigel, Carmen, literally everyone from my work," I admit "I just haven't told people who know you personally so it can't make its way back to you because you clearly don't want people to know."

She falls silent, searching her mind for the right words. She clutches the steering wheel tight and looks dead ahead at the car's bumper-to-bumper ahead of us. "I just know how to slip it into conversation."

"I don't think it's that hard, you can just say that we were friends, you don't need to give an intricate play-by-play of everything that happened."

"Why is it important that people know if we're cool again?"

I turn my head to slowly look at her "You are the one who always said 'If we don't have honesty, we have nothing at all'," I point out.

Silence strings between us again, I almost want to throw up.

'We're cool again' Nope, not anymore, we are so very far from cool. Instead of Ellie casting me little glances as she had on the ride there, she ignores my presence almost completely while I glare daggers at her. Was she embarrassed by me? When we went to lunch together why did she lie to Dina about where she was? When she slept in my bed why did Cat ask me if I knew why Ellie came home at eight AM with nothing, not even a key? Did she crawl through my bedroom window to walk around to the front door and pretend she was just getting home?

AND WHY DIDN'T I CALL HER OUT?

She was keeping me a secret and that realization hurt worse than any injury I had ever suffered. She hasn't even told her dead who practically raised me that we lived together.

God, we weren't even anything and she was keeping me under wraps like I was some disgraceful secret that she would get shamed for holding. The very second she approached our house, I got out of her car, she hadn't even stopped it completely but cake in hand, I hopped out of her car door and didn't look back.

I think I've had my fair share of partying.

After that month-long bender I had where I went to clubs every night and replaced food with vodka, I never wanted to even look at another solo cup full of liquor. Instead of drinking, smoking, or doing karaoke, I hide from Ellie.

I hide from her in conversations and sometimes sneak into my bedroom just to get a bit of breathing room from all of the strangers in my house. Wherever Ellie was, I was not. If she was outside, I was inside, if she was in the living room, I was in the kitchen enjoying my veggie platter.

Have you ever been the only sober person around in a group of people? If the answer is no, have you ever babysat a houseful of toddlers? Because it's just about the same thing.

When I'm not hiding from the girl who wriggled her way back into my good graces just to trip herself off the podium, I'm cleaning up, protecting our furniture, holding back hair as girls I've never met sob into the toilet, and stopping the drunk from doing stupid things.

"Hey, buddy," I take my can of hairspray that this frat-adjacent man is holding behind an ignited lighter "I don't think you would look good as a burn victim," His friends moan in disappointment as I do so, they were very excited to see a makeshift flamethrower; I wasn't in the mood to have my house burn down, or have a guy with peach fuzz waste my thirty dollar hair spray.

Thirty dollars?

Note to self for later: Make smarter spending choices (And smarter relationship choices!).

I felt a tap on my shoulder only to turn around and see Dina, she wasn't drunk, just tipsy "Smile!" She holds up a camera to her eye and clicks the shudder button before I even have a chance to react the flash goes off. A large Polaroid begins to print out, Dina snatches it and shakes it until you can see my silhouette, my eyes are wide, my hair flying behind me from the quick turn of my head and I'm holding a can of hairspray angled to look like I'm going to spray the camera with it "Cute!" She smiles, tucking it into her pocket for later "Wait, I want a group picture of the roommates."

Dina takes my hand and pulls me to one of the couches where Ellie and Abby sit with some guy, she shoes him to get up and drags Cat over to replace him, she stands me in between Ellie and Abby and lightly pushes me down to sit wedged between the two.

"Jesse, please do not do me dirty with this picture," She hands the pink Polaroid camera to her boyfriend and quickly ushers herself to the far left of the couch where she bends over to kiss Cat on the cheek for the picture. Ellie and I are stiff and awkward when the flash goes off.

After the picture is taken, Ellue turns to face me just the slightest "Hey, I think we should talk-

"I think it's time for cake!" I push myself off the couch and usher myself to the kitchen.

I pull the cake out of the fridge, looking at what I had done to salvage it; Below the part that said 'It's a...' I wrote '21 year old!' in chocolate pre-made Betty Crocker icing that I had in the fridge for months, it didn't look the best, but it could've been worse.

Dina, of course, cackles when she sees it. To her, it is the funniest thing she's seen all night. I stick the candles in and light it with the light I confiscated from peach fuzz frat boy and push the cake towards Dina after tucking the light back into my pocket, she is illuminated in the glow of iPhone flash all filming her.

"Make a wish!"

Age Sixteen- Grade 11

I think back to how embarrassing it felt to be thoughtful.

How fragile I felt when I would share my feelings and how frail I seem when I do it now. Ellie was always tougher than I was, in rugby, in fights, just in general. That's why I figured she would be taking it better than me when I cut contact, once again I have been proven wrong.

"Conner, can we please just leave?" I pleaded with my then-boyfriend. The night had started fine but after a couple of drinks Ellie and I were becoming increasingly hostile to one another, it wasn't my intention to speak to her but the universe forced my hand when we were shoved into a circle of our friends and made to converse around the bonfire at the beach.

The salty breeze carried the sounds of laughter and the gentle crashing of waves, the scent of roasted marshmallows wafted through the air.

"What, you need your boyfriend's permission or something?" Ellie held a can of berry blast Smirnoff, staring into my soul from the other side of the fire, the sparks glitter through the night like fireflies. Her words don't feel too bad but they don't feel too good either.

I cast her a glare before I looked back to my boyfriend "Please?"

He is getting perpetually annoyed with me he shrugs away from my grasp, "Fuck off, we just got here," He mutters, Conner must think I couldn't hear it. He had already downed three Bud lights and a couple of shots of cheap vodka, now he is nursing another beer in hand.

"Excuse me?" I say, narrowing my eyes. Everyone around the fire pauses their conversation to tune into mine. "Come on," I stand up and try to pull him along so we can have a conversation away from the prying eyes of our friends.

I can't pull the mass of the 6'2 quarterback along with me but he obliges and follows me where I yank him. As I drag him along the rest of the group giggle and makes jokes along the lines of 'Trouble in paradise' but Ellie is the only one who doesn't jump back into mindless conversation, her unnerving eyes are still on me while I chew my boyfriend out by the shoreline.

"Why do I have to leave just because you're feeling a little bummed out?"

I'm almost floored at out someone can lack so much empathy "Because you're my boyfriend?" I can feel myself tensing up.

"Why does that mean you can't get up and leave on your own?" He defends "You begged me to come here and now I just wanna down a couple of beers and hang out with my friends."

"You've already drank like twenty!" I retort.

"It's a fucking party!" Conner says, raising his voice "It's a party and it's summer and you're seriously trying to tell me not to have fun?"

"Fuck!" I shout in frustration "Why don't you ever call me? Why can't you ever let me in?" The argument is quickly escalating "Why didn't you tell me that you kissed Tamar and why haven't you told me that you love me?"

"Because I don't."

My words fail me. I knew he didn't, I knew that he hardly even liked me. My dad had thought so highly of him, she said he was the type of guy to rescue a baby from a burning building but as I look at him now, I figure that he eats babies.

I almost open my mouth to say something different, almost, but I don't. The rest of my life might have turned out differently if I didn't, I might've been able to salvage the rotting corpse of my relationship with Ellie but I didn't. "Fine," I say, voice calm and quiet "Let's stay."

Before that night I had never really gotten drunk but the second I got back to the bonfire, I was digging through the cooler and shotgunning canned Smirnoff. "Woah," Riley laughs "Someone's finally being a bad influence."

I got myself so shit-faced that when everyone else got up to dance to the music blaring through the Bluetooth speaker, I sat by myself at the shoreline, looking bitterly out towards to ocean while the tides crash at my feet and get sucked back into the ocean. For a moment I think about jumping in and letting my lax body get washed away and sink beneath the surface until I wash up as a water-bloated corpse that some nine-year-old will find when they're beach combing.

My mouth tastes like peroxide and blood, my lungs burn with a red-hot pain. The wind is becoming increasingly harsh and I ignore the hair that is tangled into my golden hoop earrings.

"Wow, you look awful," I don't need to turn around to know who it is.

"Can you just fuck off?" I say "I don't give a shit about you, just leave me alone."

She always had to antagonize me, Ellie went out of her way to stray from the group and bother me. It had something to do with the alcohol in her system. Despite her alleged hatred for me, she takes a seat next to me regardless.

"Fuck, you're so sensitive," She scoffs "I don't know why you're dating him, I'm not even sure why you'd want to fuck him unless you're too lazy to jerk off-

My hands think before my head and I deck Ellie right in the side of her face, getting a solid hit to her cheekbone. My hand flies over my mouth "I'm sorry, I-

Ellie doesn't waste any time in lunging back at me, she pushes me down by my shoulders until my back is in the shallow of the water that moments ago just splashed at my feet and takes a swing. The impact of her punch almost knocks me sober.

I take a sharp inhale, grabbing her elbows and pulling her down to where she was the one on her back and I was the one straddling her. I land one last blow to her nose, I hear a crunch and the panic immediately sends me scrambling to my feet. My eyes go wide at the blood dripping down, her face I turn to run but Ellie is faster, she grabs me by my hair and yanks me down further into the water with her.

"Fucking cunt!" I cry, though my scream is drowned out by the overwhelmingly loud tides crashing on the shore "Get the fuck off me!"

Ellie is better at fighting than I am, I had never been on this side of her before, usually, I had been the one to drag her away from fights but now I am the one who is going to stumble home numb from the devastating pain.

Frankly, I'm fucking scared.

She continues to drag me by my hair until I'm knee-deep in the water with her, she almost throws her entire weight into me, dunking me beneath the surface where her bony hands snake around my neck. My eyes have gone blurry with the salt water, they sting and burn. I can't see anything, all I can do is uselessly thrash beneath her. My hands push against her face, trying to pry her off my body.

Eventually, I manage to claw her face with my fingernails, I dig deep enough that it breaks skin and she recoils just enough for me to knee her in the stomach and let me get out from under her. Just as I try to slip away she reaches for my hair again, but instead of tugging on my hair, she rips out my gold hoop earring. I screech out in agony, hand reaching for where the metal sliced through the lobe of my ear, I shudder in pain; my cries are now jagged and harsh.

This is the exact moment Ellie begins to regret what she's done. "Fuck, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to." Her tone softens and she tries to approach me but I back away from her like a frightened dog.

"Get away from me!" Despite the pain surging in my body, I find the strength in me to hit her again, she staggers back tripping into the water. I hit her so hard that I feel a crack in my knuckle and I yelp out in the immediate shock of pain.

I wasn't sure when the others had noticed this was happening probably because my vision had gone blurry from salt water and adrenaline but before Ellie could hit me again, she was being restrained by Riley and Kennedy while some guy who I had probably had two conversations with dragged my back to shore.

I keel over on my hands and knees and begin to start retching onto the sand. Laila rubs a gentle hand on my back, my hair sticking wet on my forehead. A seagull, disturbed by the commotion, took flight, its wings cutting through the charged air.

Next to the pile of vomit I just heaved, blood drips down from my ear, pooling and then soaking into the sand. My neck swells from what is still the raw sensation of Ellie closing her hands around it.

I look up at Ellie, there is blood that has dripped its way into her mouth, clinging to her white teeth. She has what almost looks like a cat scratch running down her cheek, blood begins to prick and spill from the lacerations.

She stares back at me and we don't say a word but we understand each other clearly, I never want to see you again.

"Let's go," Ellie grabs my arm as Dina begins to slice the cake "We're gonna fix this right now."

"Ellie, there are so many people here," I say in a hushed tone so people can't hear me.

"I don't mean here," She looks at me, face expressionless "Just get in my car."

"Excuse me?" I say, tone accusing "Did you just order me to get in your car?"

"Fuck," She sighs, dropping my wrist to rub her hands down her face "Please can you get in my car so we can work this through."

"There's nothing to work through," I retort "You're embarrassed by me or you still secretly hate me and that's fine, I meant what I said on winter break about the lease, the second it's up, I'm getting the fuck out of here."

"What? No, don't- just," She takes a breath, reevaluating what to say "I have a point to make but I can't make it unless you get in my car."

We stare at each other for a moment, I narrow my eyes and she is still unmoving. Every scenario runs through my head of what could be waiting for me in that car.

"Fine."

I sit silently in her passenger seat, my knees are pulled into my chest and I rest my chin on them. Ellie doesn't say anything either as she drives. I watch each traffic light pass me, every street name to try and make sense of where we are going.

I almost feel like I'm going to suffocate beneath the silence of everything going left unsaid.

When I spot the boardwalk up ahead, I know exactly where she's taking me "Ellie, why are we at the beach?" I give her a side glance "Do I need to take out my earrings?"

Heat rises to her cheeks when I say this, "Not yet," She jokes, getting out of her car and grabbing a tote bag from the back seat, and I follow in tow.

We walk past the boardwalk and onto the sandy beach, I'm already not feeling whatever she's doing; there is sand filling up my Converse and a slight wind chill, I'm really wishing I had a hoodie right now. "Can you tell me what we're doing yet?" I'm hugging myself in an attempt to stay warm "If we're still walking on the beach why couldn't we have just walked on the boardwalk instead? It literally has walk in the name." I'm already going off on one of my tangents.

She still walking ahead of me but she briefly turns around to face me "Can you just stop asking questions for a minute?"

"Okay, whatever," I mutter, trailing behind her still. I can hardly see in the night, the only light to guide us is the moon and the warm ceiling lamps from restaurants along the boardwalk. I can vaguely see Ellie's silhouette, she's outlined by the gentle glow radiating off the moon, I try my best not to stumble over things poking out of the sand that have been lost to sight by darkness.

"Okay," Ellie stops, "Here we are."

"Where are we?" I ask "I can't see shit, I don't know where here is."

Ellie digs around in her pocket for her phone and turns on a flashlight and it reveals a small iron firepit that was cemented into a slab of concrete in the sand. She hands me her phone so I can keep the flash on her and she can see what she's doing.

She pulls out some pages ripped out from her notebook "Can you hand me your lighter?"

My eyebrows furrowed, and I felt around in my pocket wondering if I even had one. I did, it had slipped my mind that I still had the bic lighter that I confiscated from Peach Fuzz. I hand the lighter to her and watch as she tucks the pages beneath logs that were in the firepit before we arrive, they are somewhat charred but still viable.

She flicks the lighter to ignite it and the paper catches immediately. The initial flicker grew into a tentative blaze, licking at the edges of the kindling. The crackling sound echoed through the night.

Once she is sure the fire can survive without her feeding it, she steps away. "Alright, let's have it out."

"Like sex?" I scrunch up my nose.

"Oh my god, no, like let's talk this through." She pinches her nose bridge, taking a breath in before exhaling and putting her hand back down "We're gonna recreate the night of the bonfire how it should've been," Ellie reached back into her bag and pulled out two white claws "I snagged these from Dina's party, sorry this was kind of last minute."

I can't help the smile that grows on my face, I take one of the white claws and crack it open "I don't know how authentic this is gonna be if there isn't any canned Smirnoff."

I think back to exactly how that night played out and I take a seat on the sand, facing the crashing dark ocean. I sip my white claw, as expected Ellie takes a seat next to me, just what happened on the actual night.

"Wow," She says "You look really pretty and I'm an idiot for ever saying you looked awful," Ellie looks gorgeous illuminated by the orange light of the fire, and the breeze causes her flyaway hairs to drift in the wind. "I'm an asshole for pretending that I didn't know you, I was scared I would get hurt again and take it to heart like I did last time. I promise the second we get home that I'll come clean."

I don't know if I can deal with this sugary philosophy. She's being so sweet that it's rotting my teeth.

"Ellie," I say gathering my thoughts, it was so hard being honest with my feelings, it felt like I would get hospitalized if I showed any emotion. "I was so in love with you in high school that it killed me, and I was terrified that my parents would throw me out well, they did- but that's why I pushed you away and there isn't a day that goes by where I don't regret it."

The surprise on her face morphs into a soft smile "What about now?" she asks "Do you still love me?"

I shrug, it's honest "I dunno, but I think there's room to try."

She looks from me to the ocean and the way the moonlight glitters off the surface "What happened next?" Ellie toys with the tab of her drink "Did you hit me?"

"Yeah," I say softly, following her gaze out to the waters "But if we're doing the night how it should've been, I'd rather just kiss you."

Ellie turns her head back to look at me. She shoves her white claw into the sand then takes my face into one of her hands and kisses me like it's her job, so tender and carefully like she's afraid I will break beneath pressure.

How weak have I become? My heart is so full of her that I can hardly call it my own.

A/N: Be grateful for this ending because I was very tempted to give you guys an unhappy one. Sorry that I forgot to post this lol, I’m sad this series is over but excited to show you all my next one which may be the angst-iest yet 👀

Thanks for reading!

Tag list: @elliesaturnsoftdrink @elliesaesp @melanie-watermelon @yalaysbee @laundrybag29 @readbydayana @skylerwhitwyo @lmaoo-spiderman @joliettes @kittnii @taylorgracies @sameenatruther @mikellie @belles-hell @fullmachinegirl @eveshyper @whosmica

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queer-n-here · 2 months

Note

once again comin in with another meal to cook !!!

character of your choice ♡

stalker, obsessive and possessive reader (quite literally just yandere) seeing their SoulmateTM one day and just going full degenerate and doing everything in their power to learn more of their new lover, even getting rid of powerful foes or imaginary rival love interests for them. no one has any idea as to how they're able to do things no human or gifted can do. eventually, reader slowly comes in and orchestrates their first meeting and slowly woos their lover, but they have major issues on hiding their possessiveness and jealousy of others. lover can either a) be all for it and find it hot or b) lover is unsettled by it.

either way, after someone flirts with their lover, reader kind of snaps and after that person leaves, reader excuses themself and goes to absolutely maim the persom who dared to approach what was his. it's nighttime when reader is finished with them, and they come home to their lover who is worried, but becomes horrified at seeing all the blood covering reader. all reader can think about is claiming his lover, breeding him and imprinting himself so deep inside his lover that they'll always feel empty without him. (dubcon would be amazing)

~ 🕸

Oh my god 🕸️ bro 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Bruv this is so good, love you for this, and yeah, y'all I've recently started reading a shit ton of dubcon/noncon so yeah...

I did this one for Akutagawa, cuz I feel like this could work for a situation where the reader is in the Port Mafia.

Also,this one got really long, and I haven't posted in like two days, so I thought I'd make two parts, yknow? Read Pt. 2 here!

Contents: Yandere reader that stalks Akutagawa and plans out their first time meeting in person. Not that Akutagawa already knows reader's name since they both work for the Port Mafia, but that's about it.

Warnings: No smut in this part yet, top male reader, yandere tendencies, mentions of stalking, murder, ability user reader.

You had been watching Akutagawa ever since you joined the Port Mafia. In total, this is what three years of stalking and careful planning was gonna boil down to: this one opportunity.

You had planned it out meticulously, paid seventy eight people to be nearby and on the scene to prevent anything from going wrong.

A heroic rescue!

As you watched Akutagawa cut open those men with Rashomon, you couldn't help but smile. He was so precious, so brave, so beautiful, so-

You shook your head, forcing yourself to concentrate. You couldn't miss your cue. Akutagawa wasn't stupid. If you made half a mistake, he'd know what was up.

One of the men got too close to Akutagawa for your liking, and you pounced on the opportunity like a starving cat.

You dashed out of your hiding spot, your ability leaping out and cutting the man to the ground.

Akutagawa turned to look at you, surprised.

Some of the men halted, too. They hadn't thought that you would actually hurt one of them. Before it was too apparent, and before Akutagawa could notice the changes in their expressions, your ability flew out, covering the entire area. Soon, all the men but the one you were enamored with were lying on the ground in pieces.

"[Name]," Akutagawa said, frowning slightly. "Aren't you supposed to be responsible for the East block tonight?"

"I asked Higuchi to handle it." You shrugged seemingly casually, your hands in your pockets as you scanned Akutagawa's body for any injuries. "The weather is great tonight, so I thought I'd step out for a drink. And good thing I did, otherwise you would have been cut to pieces."

Akutagawa sulked slightly, no longer focusing on the reason behind your sudden appearance. "I could've handled it."

Of course he could've, he's literally perfect.

"Were these Guild's men?" Akutagawa looked around the bloody mess of bodies around you two.

"How would I know?" You placed your hands behind your head.

Akutagawa shrugged. "Whatever, they're dead now."

And so the night ended. You took Akutagawa back to his home, pretending to ask for directions, when in reality you had his address memorized. He tried to turn you down, saying that you were being paranoid, but you said you'd rather be safe than sorry.

When you reached the tall apartment building, you watched him step inside, waiting for the light to turn on in the window you knew was his before leaving.

Over the next few weeks, you orchestrated multiple meetings between you two, always appearing out of nowhere and going back to it. Slowly, Akutagawa opened up, and started trusting you.

Miraculously, you even got Mori to assign you and Akutagwa to the same area. It cost you it's worth; you had to help Mori convince Elise into some bullshit.

It wasn't long before you were sure Akutagawa had developed feelings for you. He was painfully easy to read; his cheeks would flush every time you got too close, you could sometimes feel his eyes following you as you moved around. Once, when you 'casually' playfully winked at him, and you swore you could hear his breath hitch.

But you waited. The perfect thing to seal the deal for you and Akutagawa would be a confession from him, and not from you.

There were times when you almost gave up on this thought, like that one time one of your clients found interest in Akutagawa. He was ugly as hell and nowhere close to Akutagawa, who shone brighter than the sun. You had to take care of him your own way afterwards, slitting open his insides in your secret warehouse and throwing his pieces away to the dogs.

That wasn't a first-time occurrence, nor was it the last, but you fought well to keep your cool as long as Akutagawa was around. You didn't want him to know that side of you.

That day, you had known something was up even before you saw Akutagawa. There was a funny feeling in your stomach, and you felt like something great was going to happen.

And it did.

"I... I really l-like you."

His words caught you off guard, and for a moment you almost punched yourself in the face to confirm whether it was a dream or reality. But you stopped yourself.

"Really?" Even as you spoke, your hands were already reaching for Akutagawa, pulling him closer to you.

He nodded, his entire face red.

A small broke through your face, and you kissed him, holding his waist in your hands.

It was finally happening. It was finally happening! Three years, four months, twenty-seven days, sixteen hours and forty-two minutes after you'd first laid eyes on this angelic man, you had finally kissed him!

It was a gentle kiss, despite the roaring in your head and all the urges to crush him into yourself. You nipped at Akutagawa's lips gently, making his breath hitch in that oh-so majestic way. He tasted like the best thing in the world, and you just couldn't get enough.

It was him who pulled away first, you wouldn't willingly part from those beautiful lips even if you suffocated to death. Staring at you with shining eyes and a shy little smile on his ethereal face, Akutagawa spoke.

"So... D'you... wanna be my boyfriend?"

Yes, yes, YES! A thousand times yes!

You nodded, pressing your forehead against his.

#dom male reader #top male reader #dom reader #bsd x you #sub bsd x you #sub bsd #bungou stray dogs #sub bungou stray dog x you #sub bungou stray dogs #akutagawa x you #sub akutagawa x you

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bigassmoonchild · 8 months

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(Slides a 20 into the ask box)

How do the boys react to dealing with a stubborn S/O who will deliberately do things if they have asked multiple times just to get the other hand

Rubbish need taking out already did it

Washing up need do already drying

Like real petty

( not based on real life events of today .......)

god, i love this. i will always take a 20, but my writing will be free for today <3 (this may not be based on things i've had to deal with as well, woopsies. i'm also absolutely having a stroke trying to type this, i can't spell today??)

Simon 'Ghost' Riley:

he tried his best. you couldn't put it past him, he really did try a lot. you were just also incredibly petty, but sometimes he really did lack in these types of things.

'si, can you wash up the dishes for me?' you asked one night, slipping away to take a shower after he gave a sound of acknowledgement. he hadn't really been paying much attention, focused on the little puzzle you had brought for him from your family.

it was 500 pieces, so you really couldn't blame him. you had your own fixations, and god forbid someone try to take those from you when you were in the middle of it.

half an hour later, you came back out. 'simon, please don't forget the dishes,' you called out to him and disappeared for some time. he wasn't sure how much time had passed before he rubbed his face with his hands, trying to wipe away the frustration of not being able to get the pieces to fit together.

he finally stood up to stretch and go to do the dishes. when he walked in, the sink and counter were spotless, the dishes sitting in their drying racks. his brows furrowed, a little confused.

he glanced in the bedroom, seeing you sitting there while reading. 'lovie, did you wash the dishes?' he asked, watching as you gave him a faint nod. he hummed, getting ready for bed and not entirely thinking about it.

when he left for his run before you woke up, he made a note to himself to put the dishes away. he unlocked the door, sliding his running shoes off and taking a quick shower before coming back out to the kitchen.

there you stood, the dishes all put away and his tea being made, your coffee cooling down on the counter. he gave another little hum, giving you a quick kiss on the temple as he finished off his own tea.

you glanced at the kitchen, squinting a little at the rubbish. 'si, could you take out the rubbish for me?' you asked and he nodded at you, watching as you stood and took your own shower. you came out and went to the garbage, pulling it up out of the bin.

simon stood, grabbing the bag out of your hands. 'lovie, you asked me to do this. I'm going to get to it,' he whispered and pecked your lips, tying it up and taking it out. when he came back, he washed his hands. 'you just need to give me a little more time to do these things,' he told you and you nodded.

'i'm just so used to exes not ever really doing them. it's easier for me to do them and make sure they get done,' you whispered to him. he pulled you into a hug, resting his chin on your head.

the two of your sighed deeply, your arms finding their way around his back. 'it's okay, sweetheart,' he whispered. 'i'll try to get them done when you ask, but i just need time to get things done,' he kissed the top of your head. 'when i'm home, i can take time to get things done. it's nice for me,' he added. you nodded carefully.

Captain John Price:

honestly? he was probably the best about getting things done when you asked. sometimes, though, especially right after a mission he would lack at it. you tried to understand, but it was getting tiring.

'john, i really need you to clean the cats littler today. rubbish gets picked up tomorrow,' you said to him and he glanced up at you from the couch.

'i've got it, honey,' he told you and you nodded, bidding him goodbye for your work day. john had just come home from a three month mission, and found himself drifting on the couch as he watched shit tv.

hearing his phone buzz, he checked it to see a text from you. litter needs to b edone! we might need to get some more before cleaning it. he responded with a simple 'of course, honey'.

drifting once more, he briefly heard the door open and close, felt your lips press against his head and the blanket lay over him. when he woke up fully, he saw you walking back into the room and going into the kitchen. the water ran and he heard you turn it off. probably washing your hands.

he stood up fully, placing the blanket on the back of the couch and going into the bathroom where the litter was. it was clean, and the cat (mr. muffins you'd lovingly named him, but he rather liked to call him dipshit) was blinking up at john.

walking out to the kitchen where you were standing, he wrapped him arms around you. 'i would've done the litter, just fell asleep a bit too long,' he whispered and you hummed to him. he helped cook dinner, choppign some of the vegetables and adding them to the pan when you'd needed.

he made sure to wash everything he'd used, placing them on the rack to dry. he served himself a plate and yours as well, placing them down to ensure you had the warmer food. the two of you ate, quietly talking about things that had happened during the day. 'i think dipshit took another tumble off the bookshelf,' john told you and you laughed long and loud.

shooing you off to take a nice, long shower, john washed the dishes and put them off to the side to dry. he crawled into bed with you, holding you close to him while you drifted off.

he woke up late the next morning, finding you in the kitchen sipping on some coffee. the dishes were put away, and you gave him a little smile.

cupping your face, he pressed a kiss against your lips and looked you in the eye. 'if i start something, i'm going to finish it,' he whispered and you nodded softly.

Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick:

'kyle, there's some clothes in the wash. i need you to move them over to the dryer in an hour!' you called out while walking out. it was the day you'd go out with your sister and enjoy yourselves. take some time away from everything and just relax.

he called back to you, 'i've got it, lovely!' and you left. you called him, explaining that today was going to run a little longer than normal. you also double checked to make sure that he was going to swap the loads over, and he gave you a little confirmation.

he didn't have it. to be completely honest, he forgot all about it until well after you'd been home. 'how was tonight, sweetheart?' he asked and you told him all about what your sister had said. some new information about the latest guy she was dating, something about her friend having a kid.

'oh! did you swap the load over? have you got it up here already?' you asked and his eyes widened. 'kyle, seriously?' you asked, sounding exhausted. 'it was one thing i asked of you today,' and he sighed deeply.

shaking his head, he looked down at you. 'i'm sorry. i forgot all about it, and that's my mistake,' he moved around you to go do it himself.

'no,' you huffed, placing your bags down. 'i'm going to go do it, it'll probably need to be rewashed because it might smell bad,' and you disappeared into the laundry room. he was annoyed, he understood that it sucked to try and have a relaxing day just to come home to more things to do, but you really needed to give him some leeway.

he was going to fix it, but you had to jump in and do that. neither of you talked that night, just going to sleep in silence. it felt wrong, to go to bed somewhat angry, but he wasn't sure what to say.

the next morning, you both sat at the table, drinking your drinks in silence. 'i'm sorry,' he spoke up finally. you just gave him a little grunt, not looking up at him. 'seriously, i'm genuinely sorry. i really just forgot, i didn't mean to give you more work,' he told you and you sighed deeply.

'i'm just really tired of picking up the slack where people forget or don't realize. i don't find it difficult to realize what needs to be done around the house, i juts need you to try harder,' you told him. he nodded, not promising to be perfect but promising to try. 'that's all i need,' you whispered.

Johnny 'Soap' McTavish:

when you walked in the door, he pulled you into a tight hug. 'hi, baby,' he whispered into your hair and pressed a kiss against it. you gave him a little greeting, allowing him to pull you over to the table. he'd set up a little after work snack for you, knowing you'd be hungry.

you gave him a little kiss, thanking him for the food. 'if you go for a run, can you bring the rubbish out?' you asked, giving him another kiss as he nodded and went into your shared room.

he put away the few clothes he'd still had left to put away from his mission, coming back out to see you putting the dishes away. for some time, the two of you sat together watching one of the shows you'd been watching together.

after the episode ended, you turned to johnny. 'don't forget about the rubbish,' you hummed to him and hopped into the shower. he took his time getting ready for the run, sitting on the bed with his clothes set out while he waited for you to be done.

you walked out and he pecked your cheek. 'needed to piss a river,' he whispered to you, briefly hearing you mention the rubbish once more as you walked away to your shared office. he knew you'd be doing an art project, one he wasn't allowed to look at.

quickly leaving the apartment, he took his time on the run. it was something he did to clear his head, something he did to relax. he spent a good thirty minutes on the run, looping around the different blocks of the area you lived.

when he came back around to the apartment, he found you outside tossing out the rubbish. 'oh, forgot all about that. woulda done it after the run,' and you shook your head, sighing deeply.

'i reminded you three times, johhny,' you whispered to him, walking back to your shared apartment in silence. it was quiet for a little while, the two of you just sitting there. he felt bad, of course he did, but he never meant for him to forget.

'i'm sorry, baby,' he said to you, hand reaching out for yours before you pulled away. johnny sighed deeply, groaning harshly. 'really? the silent treatment?' you groaned as well, standing up.

turning to look at him, you shook your head. 'i asked you three times. i just needed the one thing done, that's it,' you told him. he pulled you in for a hug.

pressing a kiss against your head, he rocked the two of your side to side. 'i really didn't mean to forget,'

#simon riley x reader #john price x reader #kyle garrick x reader #john mctavish x reader #task force 141 #call of duty x reader #no use of y/n #simon ghost riley x reader #captain john price x reader #kyle gaz garrick x reader #john soap mctavish x reader #ghost mw2 #price mw2 #gaz mw2 #soap mw2 #slight angst #cod mw2 #modern warfare ii #call of duty

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copperbadge · 7 months

Text

[ID: Three images; top left, a spray bottle of clear liquid, labeled PRO SPRAY, sits on a gleaming cutting board; top right, Dearborn the tortie glares at the camera from the work desk's copilot basket. Bottom, a white rug with blue patterning in my hallway, surrounded at the edges by dark dustbunny-looking lumps.]

NaClYoHo Day Two! Pardon my grossness.

Yesterday afternoon I did the first of what is usually several trips to the hardware store; I bought spackle, gnat traps, and a PROFESSIONAL spray bottle. PRO SPRAY. It has an adjustable nozzle and measurement marks on the side, so I can dilute the vinegar pretty accurately. Last night I filled it up with vinegar water and laminated the kitchen, and this morning found and killed several weevils it drove out of hiding. It's sitting on the wooden cutting board because I had taken ALL the cleaning supplies out from under the sink and was reminded I should oil my cutting board with some Walrus Oil.

Dearborn is very skeptical about this morning's activity: carpet cleaning.

I threw on an episode of A Date With Dateline, popped in my earbuds, took down my Tineco One X vac and vacuumed for the first time in Slightly Too Long. I didn't get all the way through the house because I was running it on high which drains the battery, but usually vacuuming is a multi-day process. For what I paid for the Tineco I could have a high-end corded vac that does a better job, but I know that I won't use corded vacs because I hate the cord, so I'm okay vacuuming more often with the cordless. In any case, I hit the rugs because the next step was to break out the Hoover Powerdash Pet carpet cleaner and figure out how to use it.

I know I'm dropping a lot of brand names but just because I usually get asked; I don't make money from affiliate links or anything.

Anyway, the Powerdash came to me secondhand from friends who were moving, and for a long time it sat in my hallway in its plastic wrapping because I was intimidated by it. We never had one growing up and I've never really seen one in use. But it turned out that it was super easy to use, you just add water and cleaner to the tank and go; you go over the rug once with the trigger down, to spread water/cleaner, then a second time without the trigger to rinse/dry. I only hit about half of the rugs in my home, just to see how it went, and then stopped because they all seemed to remain very wet after cleaning. (They've since pretty much dried and I'm assured by the internet that's normal.)

The white patterned carpet above is the cats' favorite place to roll around and shed on, and as you can see, those dark dustbunny looking things around the carpet? That's cat hair and other dirt the cleaner pulled up. Gross but visibly effective.

I got a slightly late start so I had myself on a hard time limit; I started at 7, finished up at 8, and still had half an hour left on A Date With Dateline (they sometimes run a bit long). The cleaning solution definitely adds a certain chemical smell to the air, so I'm running the HVAC's fan and I've added "scented candle or incense" to the shopping list. Which I wanted to do anyway; some people always have such nice smelling houses and scent never seems to stick around in mine, but I've never gone hardcore on Making This Place Smell Nice. (Yes, I promise to be careful about what scents I use, I know diffused scents can harm cats.)

Disposable nitrile glove count: Still just 1!

Hardware store trips: 1.....so far.

#naclyoho #national clean your home month #cleaning #carpet shampoo #dirt

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dotster001 · 2 years

Note

Are you ok with writing alcohol related stuff? I think it would be funny to have a drunk headmaster complain to reader about all the work and mischievous students while reader tries to calm him down and just get him to drink water because fae apparently do not have a superior tolerance. OR on the opposite: reader gets drunk and Crowley has to deal with us now maybe we get him flustered too >:)

(hey nonnie I finally finished it. I seriously debated waiting until my birthday so I could be like, "the US government says I can drink now!" But luckily for both of us, I got hit with the inspiration bug. I hope it's everything you dreamed edit; I just realized I combined your two ideas into one...oops I went flustered crowman route)

Drugged Up Reader Addition from 300 Followers event

A/N: It's in my pinned post, and I've mentioned this in a couple posts, but if this is the first of my stuff you've read, I view NRC as an actual college, so reader here is 18+. If it makes you more comfy, imagine it as grad school age.

CW: excessive drinking, black out from drinking

Fae were known to hold their liquor extraordinarily well. A bottle? Three? Bah! That didn't matter at all to the fae! Besides, he deserved to treat himself after putting up with shenanigans all day.

Four bottles……

Yeah, so Crowley was on his sixth bottle of a 300 year old wine of excellent vintage, when fate decided it was time for you to come to his office. Naturally, as the cool, collected, fabulous headmage he was, all he had to do was play it cool, and you'd never know.

"Greetings Prefect! What can I do ya for?" Yep. You'd never know.

Had he been more sober, he would have noticed that you were soaking wet and covered in dust and plaster bits. But since he didn't notice, he was able to not notice this fact, as you sat across from him with a frustrated huff.

"The shower in Ramshackle exploded," you scowled. "Any chance, in all your generosity, that there is some budget for a new one?"

"But of course!" He stood up, gesturing wildly. You couldn't hide your shock, which made him laugh, as he leaned over his desk to squish your face between his palms.

"My dearest, squishiest, prefect. Whatever you want, I shall give you!"

Suddenly, you gasped. "Are you drunk?"

He let go of your face and scoffed, illustrating the six empty bottles on his desk.

"Nonsense, my dear, the fae don't get drunk. As you can see, I have only consumed ten bottles…"

"There's only six here, though," you interrupted, becoming nervous for his health.

"Ah! You're right! I still have four more bottles to consume! You must join me Y/N!"

"I don't think I should…."

He kept over his desk with surprising dexterity, and gently slotted himself in your lap, nuzzling his cheek against yours like a cat.

"C'mon Y/N, I'd hate to drink alone. I'd be sooooo lonely without you…like before…" his eyes were suddenly elsewhere, and he froze in your lap.

Then he started tearing up, crying into your collar.

"Please don't leave me, Y/N!" He sobbed.

You began running your hands through his hair worriedly, trying to calm him down.

"Do you mean, like right this moment, or in general?" You asked, mildly amused with yourself.

"Yes," he whimpered. You had no idea how the giant crow man was able to make himself look so small in your lap, but it was making your heart melt.

"Okay, I won't leave then," you said, hoping that it would calm him a little.

He looked up at you, suddenly no longer crying, eyes full of total adoration.

"I love you Y/N. It's time you know that," he breathed, moving closer to your lips.

Then he blacked out.

….

Crowley opened his eyes, and immediately shut them again with a groan. The lights in his room were too bright, and his head hurt, and….wait. He didn't remember going to his room last night.

"Ah, sleeping beauty has finally awoken," that was your voice, but what were you doing in his room?

He opened his eyes, and slowly sat up. You were sitting in a chair next to his bed, holding a book and, great sevens, wearing his clothes.

"Why are you here?" He asked cautiously.

"You blacked out on me, and I had to drag you to your room. You're surprisingly heavy, you know. Are you hiding muscles under all those layers?"

He scoffed, ready to tell you about how someone of his station had to stay in good shape, until he fully processed what you had said.

"How generous of you to bring me to my room," he croaked. "But why," he swallowed thickly, "why are you wearing a set of my clothes?" Not that he'd complain. They looked good on you.

You raised a single eyebrow. "My shower exploded, remember? My clothes were all wet and dirty, and I didn't want to ruin your furniture, so I kind of just grabbed something from your closet." Your grin turned downright evil. "Wait, do you not remember anything from last night?"

You giggled. He loved that giggle, but right now he was filled with pure terror.

"I have an excellent memory, prefect," he scowled, trying to play it off. But it was clearly too late. You knew.

You stood up, and approached him. You squished his cheeks with your palms.

"So you remember this then?"

He loved your smile, but right now he wanted to wipe it off your face. You'd left him in his clothes, thank goodness, so you couldn't see his reddening cheeks under his mask. He'd never been more grateful for anything.

"Of course I remember," he said, composure disappearing fast.

"Then you remember this?" You crawled into his lap, and buried you face in his collar. He stiffened, afraid if he breathed you would disappear.

"Ye…yes."

"Okay," you grinned wickedly, "so you'll remember this then." You leaned into his ear and whispered, "I love you, Y/N."

He was going to have what humans called a heart attack. Had he really said that last night? He'd kept it buried for so long….

"If you remember that, you'll definitely remember this," you leaned in as though to kiss him, but pulled away and left his lap at the last second. He involuntarily let out a whine, making you giggle.

"And that's when you passed out."

He was on his feet in seconds pulling you tightly to him, directing your chin so you face him.

"Kiss me," he whispered breathlessly.

"That's not what happened," now that he was fighting back, you were starting to look flustered. Good. You deserved it.

"I'll give you whatever you want if you kiss me," he said, confidence steadily growing now that the ball was back in his court.

"Whatever I want? Hmmm…" you said thoughtfully, then leaned in to kiss him. He nibbled along your bottom lip, causing you to gasp, and allowing him to deepen the kiss. After several breathless moments, you pulled away from him entirely.

"Whatever I want," you muttered to yourself, and made to leave the room. As you pulled open the door, you called over your shoulder, "Fix my damned shower."

...

Tag list: @stygianoir

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #dire crowley x reader #dire crowley #twst crowley x reader #twst crowley

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lesmismignon · 8 months

Text

something something a mother's day fic set after Threnody. it has been at least 3 mother's days now. at this rate my gf's cats will call me mother sooner than this gets finished, so

"You looked troubled."

Seras blinked. Her master was in front of her with his torso sticking out of the ceiling.

"Eh." She did not reply any further than that.

"You know, I almost miss the high-pitched, annoying police girl. At least then you were respectful."

"I'm always respectful, Master," Seras said, wide-eyed and innocent.

Alucard disappeared and reappeared in the hall, standing properly this time. He looked bored, which explained his nosiness.

"Perhaps I may be able to dispense advice."

Yeah, sure. Dracula. Vlad the Impaler. Giving her sound advice. Great. She would have better luck summoning Walter on an ouija board.

"Has anyone told you how loud your thoughts are?"

Her eyes twitched. Alucard was trying, in his own dysfunctional way, to make up for his thirty-year absence. Which was all fine and dandy, but as usual he had the worst timing. "I'm sorry, Master. It's just something to do with Integra."

"Oh?" There was a distinct inflection.

Seras prided herself on not blushing. Ever since the day in which the office was not wrecked, the relationship between her two masters had improved. Too improved. Actually, even Pip was starting to avoid the walls near Integra's bedroom!

"Yes, well, it's Mother's Day soon."

Alucard stared, uncomprehending.

"And I want to get her a present, is all. The thing is, I've exhausted my options—"

"You want to get Integra a Mother's Day gift," he deadpanned.

"Yes. I do every year."

"Do you see Integra as a mother figure?"

"Yes? Oh! I know it's strange, since we're only three years apart, but that's easy to forget when she has those wrinkles—which are lovely on her," Seras added hastily, misreading Alucard's expression. "I know I tease her! But I told her, Master, go and apply those creams I got you for your fiftieth birthday if you're really that unhappy—"

"Then, pray tell," Alucard drew out, "what does that make me?"

Seras blinked again. Then it dawned on her.

"O-oh." She fidgeted. "I guess that would make you a, um."

There was a pause.

"To be honest, Master, you're, er, you've been away for so long—no offense! It's not quite—how should I say—" Seras coughed. "Um. I could—oh! Wait! Let me show you something."

She whipped out from her pocket a black rectangle.

"This is the modern phone, Master!" Seras explained quickly. "A smartphone! It can take calls, pictures, videos, go on the internet—do everything, basically. So, er, what I'm trying to show you is...there!" She swiped several times on the screen and then held it up.

Alucard stilled.

"It's Master Integra's old photos! There aren't a lot, she always gets so snippy when I try to take them..."

The photo on display was taken a few summers ago. It was a side profile of Integra, capturing a moment seconds before she had fully turned and swatted at the phone. They had taken a rare day off at the beach. She was gazing off into the ocean distance, and perhaps because of that, her one eye was a deeper blue, a depth that went to the far reaches of her thoughts.

"I almost burned that day," Seras said casually, next to Alucard's stock-stillness. "You can't tell, but she has on a blue sundress. She looked so pretty in it! I had to convince her not to go back and change, what was all that sun lotion I'd put on her for, then? And…" She trailed off. "Um, you need to use your bare finger, Master."

Alucard was attempting to copy what Seras had done and swipe for more pictures. Upon her input his gloves vanished. Seras did not miss how they had been blank.

Her eyes curved. You really are… "Wait."

She jumped and tugged at his sleeve as he began to walk away. "Master, you can't take it, that's my private phone!"

"Don't you think privacy is redundant when I can read your thoughts?"

"What? What does that even--that just means you shouldn't be doing either! Give it back! I--I need that to message Pip--"

"Your goose boy? Don't you two talk enough in your heads?"

"Never you mind," Seras screeched, and ripped the phone from his grasp. "Master, I promise I'll get you your own, just give me an hour!"

Alucard looked at her owlishly. "I want the photos."

"With the photos! God!" Seras darted into a wall to escape.

#Hellsing #hellsing fanfiction #this has been in my drafts for so long i get confused if i ever posted it or not #if i have pls ignore #seras victoria #Alucard #let's get my Hellsing writing mode up and running #alutegra

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diazsdimples · 5 months

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Fic Writing Review 2023 🥳

Words and Fics

222,730 words published to AO3

1 fandom (9-1-1)

Most recent drop: sugar and spice and all that smells nice (Buddie | 6.3k | E)

Longest fic: Buck's Baby (By Accident) (Buddie | 119k | G)

Top Fics By Kudos

Buck's Baby By Accident (Buddie | 119k | G)

Fucking Finally (Finally Fucking) (Buddie | 3.9k | E)

Burning with Need (Buddie | 3.8k | E)

First Words (Buddie | 2k | G)

In sickness and in health (but mostly in sickness) (Buddie | 3.7k | G)

My Fandom Events in 2023

Didn't do any! I joined the fandom in June and didn't write anything until July 🙃

Upcoming Events and Projects for 2024

This all depends on how many babies need delivering next year ngl, and how much of the year I spend on call but here's the WIPs I have so far!

To finish/publish:

With you I'm home - I quoted 20 chapters for this because Buck's Baby was also 20 chapters but I am 100% playing this by air. In this fic, we see Buck and Eddie embarking on their first year of marriage. They have a 2 year old son (Aidan) and Christopher, who is 14. This fic will show them navigating parenting a boisterous toddler and a sassy teenager while they begin their journey to having a new baby.

Cat Fic!! - this has been sitting in my WIPs folder for months now and I haven't had the beans to write it recently! Buck has adopted a cat with a curious name that brings a whole load of feelings to the forefront of his brain (is he saying I love you to the wrong Eddie?) and also provides some excellent material to fuck with his friends.

AUs that live in my head rent free

GTA AU - Listen I know this sounds weird, BUT, Buck and Eddie are heads of rival motorcycle gangs and constantly engage in turf wars. They realise they have the same product dealer for their cocaine lockups, who has been selling them dodgy product, resulting in loss of revenue for both men. They come together to confront the man realise they work extremely well together and who knows, maybe rival MC gang members can fall in love!

Piano Teacher!Buck, Parent!Eddie and Student!Chris - this was inspired by my Musician AU Play me like a fiddle, and was vaguely encouraged on Ao3 by @theotherbuckley, and will be a oneshot of Eddie coming to Buck after being referred to him by Christopher's physical therapy. Buck is more than happy to take Christopher on as a student is fast delighted by his constant, bubbly optimism. Eddie watches as Buck teaches his son and watches Christopher's confidence in himself build and realises, fuck, he's slowly falling in love with his son's teacher.

His Dark Materials AU - Buck finds himself in possession of an alethiometer and the more questions he asks of it, trying to figure out it's true meaning, the more he finds himself being drawn towards a dark, mysterious man he's noticed hanging around the college lately. Buck's daemon is instantly drawn to Eddie's daemon and the two find themselves unlikely friends, embarking on a quest to discover what it is the alethiometer is trying to warn them about.

Single Parents AU - Buck is the single father of two daughters and has just joined the 118 and is struggling to find his place. He meets another single father at his daughter's school in the pick up line one day and Eddie reveals he's training at the LAFD but struggling with childcare while he does it. Buck suggests they combine childcare and offers to help Eddie train, and even gets him a position in the 118 when Eddie graduates. How long will they coparent their three kids before they realise they've got it bad for each other?

Misc. ideas that haven't quite developed into fics yet but exist!

Magic Au - Buck and Eddie both have the power to control their auras (which have a colour and scent specific only to them) and go through rigorous training to enable them to save the earth from the Elder Race threatening to take over (inspired by Michael Scott's Secrets of the Immortal Nicholas Flamel)

Detectives AU - I've been watching too many Scandinavian crime shows and want to write Buddie solving a grisly murder

Chances are I'll come up with more over the summer!

Tags and rules under the cut

Rules: Feel free to show whatever stats you have. Only want to show Ao3 stats? Rock on. Want to include some quantitative info instead of stats? Please do this. Want to change how yours is presented? Absolutely do that. Would rather eat glass than do this? Please don’t eat glass but don’t feel like you have to do this either.

Tagged by @jesuisici33 and @hippolotamus thank you my loves!

(no pressure) tagging @malewifediaz @theplaceyoustillrememberdreaming @theotherbuckley @disasterbuckdiaz @thewolvesof1998 @callmenewbie @cal-daisies-and-briars @daffi-990 @monsterrae1 @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels @rainbow-nerdss @wikiangela @steadfastsaturnsrings @spagheddiediaz @eddiebabygirldiaz @watchyourbuck @loserdiaz @smilingbuckley @fortheloveofbuddie @spotsandsocks (ignore if you've already done it!)

#ao3 review #there will probably be some weird sex in there too tbh #praying musican au makes it to the top 5 list next year #that's my baby #ceo of weird AUs

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not-poignant · 6 months

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Hi Pia

I'm so sorry you've been experiencing difficulties recently. I'm sending all my love and light your way and hope you start to feel a little less shitty soon.

P.s - Do you mind sharing your tiktok so we can follow you there too? Or is it a private acc?

Lots of love to you <3

It's not private! It's just not updated very often. Overall I'm more active on Instagram. But neither are private. The Tiktok is very art-focused so it might not be what you're looking for. But it's also pretty harmless overall.

And thank you anon <3

The last few days I had to stop writing and like...quickly redo my schedule for December and cut it back a little, which always makes me sad, but I'm trying to conserve my mental health as well as my physical. I realised I met all the criteria for a pretty serious depressive episode late last week (I have, alongside severe PTSD, Major Depressive Disorder, which is the one that will kill me if I don't keep an eye on it -> though I'm happy to report I'm not like in a very like 'I don't want to live' space right now, I can just tell I'm feeling / experiencing a lot of the red flags that go in that direction), and if I don't act now, that tends to lead to pretty bad places.

So I've redone the schedule for December and that will come out likely on Friday or Saturday. And then I'll only be posting during January for half of the month, and not the whole month, and taking off two weeks re: posting. Hopefully these are the sorts of things which will head off me needing to go into hiatus because I desperately don't want to do that <3

I can already tell I'm doing a little better after being a lot firmer with some boundaries, and also just...with myself re: taking more time off. I wish I didn't feel so guilty about it? But that's not anyone's fault here, that's shit to work on with my therapist/s, lol.

Today I spent around 3 hours researching a response to an ask (whoops), and then realised - not through any one person's actions but a bunch at once - that I need to kind of stop engaging with facecast stuff (nothing wrong with facecasting, the problem is wholly on me there and I wish I'd seen that sooner and saved people some pain and saved me from some rudeness).

I put away the shopping (we have a really good grocery delivery system here which is great for my disabilities etc.), and had some raspberries, and put on the Christmas tree lights.

I was so tired at lunch that I could only manage a bowl of cereal (and couldn't eat breakfast. I think my therapist would be like 'why are you putting three hours of research into responding to something instead of focusing on eating food' but well, whoops? Lol. To be fair I thought it would be way easier to answer, but Tumblr's search function is SO broken).

I fed my wonderful cat, Maybe, and got some sleep in the afternoon and then did some writing (1,200 words) on Palmarosa. It's like 7.00pm right now, and I'm going to put up some chapter commentaries on Patreon and Ream.

Tonight I might do some watercolour art, and I'm hoping to finish Palmarosa tomorrow.

December is actually a hard time of year for me anyway. It's the month that has the most chronological / time-based triggers, and my therapists know this and I'm hearing a lot of 'how are you in the lead up to December' which is about to become 'how are you coping with December.'

I'm grateful for small pleasures. Like my dahlias are looking pretty awesome right now. Here's some photos of this week (some art I'm working on, Maybe being cute, or screm, dahlia, Christmas set up, T-Rex ornament, Santa Platypus ornament):

#asks and answers #personal #lots of love to you too anon i hope you like the photos #that pride blanket was crocheted by my mum #i never have a themed christmas it's just #20 years of collected decorations salfjkas

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gumikpxp · 1 year

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Clover

werewolf! Au

3. Origin

pairing: Werewolf!Shua x Bunnyhybrid!Reader (f)

warnings: Fluff, slight angst mentions of heats and trafficking

synopsis: A werewolf and a bunny seem like a terrible match and would have no chance of working. however you can't argue with fate and if joshua gets a cute cottontail mate he doesn't seem to mind. At least that what his brothers believe when they watch joshua stare at his bunny mate with the most adoring look in his eyes as she showed him the four leaf clover she found in the garden. Who were they to question the moon goddess anyways.

"Where am I from?" She asked with a head tilt and Joshua nodded taking the seat next to her. She hummed turning her body slightly towards him.

"China. Originally at least! That's where my Mom and dad is too! but i haven't seen them since i was maybe 5 years old?" She explained to him moving her hands around as she explained.

"not that i'm complaining but if your parents are in china how'd you get here?" Joshua asked and she pouted slightly shaking her head.

"i don't want you to get sad." she mumbled looking down at her hands that were now sat in her lap and picked at the skin on her fingers. Joshua noticing this frowned and grabbed her hands holding them in his.

"i think i'll be okay, i'd really like to know more about you.. if that's okay with you.." he told her and she looked up at him and nodded slightly with a sigh.

"My mom and dad were adopted at a hybrid shelter in china by some very wealthy people for their daughter. Well they ended up having me over time along with a few brothers and sisters." Y/n started looking bad at their hands now intertwined tracing his knuckles with her fingers.

"Well it turns out their family wasn't wealthy for no reason. They only wanted to keep my mom and dad and then one of my sisters for later breeding. When she was old enough. And once we were old enough to be taken from our mothers they sold the rest of us to a hybrid trafficking ring...." Joshua tensed at her words suddenly wanting to squeeze her impossibly tight to himself as if to protect her from the painful memories she was reliving.

"Bunnies tend to go very fast, especially female bunnies because of our reputation with heats. So i was bought pretty quickly from and international deal here in korea.. but because I wasn't old enough for my heat and still had years of waiting I didn't get my heats. That made my old master really angry." The girls ears dropped almost to hide herself and it only filled joshua with rage and sadness he was almost sure she would be able to sense it through the mating bond.

Needing to be impossibly closer to his mate joshua pulled her chair nearer to him and wrapped his arms around her smaller figure. She gave him a soft smile linking her hands with his again when she had the chance.

"Because of this he made me his personal servant, i wasn't the only one tho there was another hybrid, an older girl she was a cat, because i was so young at the time she acted as an older sister to me.. almost a mother? She felt sorry for me a lot and hated the abuse he would put me through and after a couple of years she got sick of it. She made a plan to get me out of there." Y/n explained to joshua finally looking at him again.

"Because i was the runt of my siblings when i turn i'm very small. she took advantage of that joshua the next time she was to pack a car of one of his guest she was going to smuggle me out. it worked i was able to get out but i was trapped in the trunk for a while longer than expected, so when the trunk finally opened and i had the chance i escaped and ran into the forest and i've been here for years." She finished explaining to him and he furrowed his eyebrows.

"Wait... years?" he asked and she nodded. "how come i've only been able to sense you now.." he asked her and she shrugged.

"Well, i'm finally of age for my heats... i turned 18 three days ago, maybe it's the same for mates? is that what you called it. Maybe we can't sense each other until a certain point of maturity.." She explained to him and his eyes widened slightly. She's still so young.

"I missed your birthday?" he asked and she shrugged

"i mean it's not like you knew.." she mumbled and he's hooked his head still somehow disappointed in himself.

"how did you celebrate?" he asked and she furrowed her eyebrows again.

"what do you mean celebrate?"

"like.. a birthday party?" he asked her and she taped slightly.

"what's that?!"

"Wow. She's a clueless little thing isn't she."

Joshua grumbled rolling his eyes.

"Jeonghan.. seriously?" The younger mumbled and jeonghan chuckled slightly.

"don't worry it's adorable, heartbreaking yet adorable. You're gonna be a handful." Jeonghan told the girl.

"I hope when you get mated it's someone who despises you." Josh mumbled to his brother and he only laughed in response.

"Oh please i'm sure my mate will me a saint!"

"Oh! you said you were from china right?" Josh asked and she nodded quickly.

"I think a couple of my brothers would love to meet you!" Josh smiled at her and her cheeks seemed to redden a bit at it. her ears quickly dripping in front of her face.

#svtcreations #svt fanfic #svt x reader #svt fluff #svt dino #svt dk #svt hoshi #svt joshua #svt junhui #svt minghao #svt mingyu #svt vernon #svt woozi #svt xu minghao #joshua hong #svt seungkwan #svt

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nocompromise-noregrets · 1 month

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five good things

aaaaand straight in with the really good one:

We have Last Cat Standing back after his thyroid treatment - he spent nine days at the vet hospital, and his thyroid is completely cured. Hooray! He turned 18 on Monday, and this has got him back to normal and given him who knows how many more years. I can't tell you how much of a relief it is, given that we lost the other three to various things that we couldn't do anything about.

I have a four day weekend, having done two days for job number two last week, and I am going to enjoy every last moment of it.

I did a full-body-stretch yoga routine today, having done no exercise whatsoever (other than a bit of walking) for far too long - I've been really achy and sore this week, particularly around the hips, which is always a sign I need to exercise, and I feel a lot better for having stretched properly, although I'm going to have to do the same routine every day for a good long while, I suspect.

I've got a gig lined up! It's not until October, but New Generation Superstars, a bunch of punk rock n' rollers from Leicester who I got to know at Trash Fest in Helsinki well over ten years ago, are finally playing this end of the country, and to top it off they're supporting Spread Eagle, who were a fantastic hard rock band at the end of the 80s/beginning of the 90s and who have been reformed for a few years now. I had no idea they were back, so when I saw the dates on NGS's FB page yesterday I had to go and check in case it was someone else - but it's them! I'm so excited. :D

I've almost finished my OU course - I just have the final essay to do, and my tutor thought my essay plan was good so it should be fairly easy to write it up from that. I'm on course for a good First/Distinction, which is deeply satisfying given that the last time I did any studying I was fairly solidly in the 64% territory all the way - which is all right, but I couldn't seem to improve whatever I did, I didn't know what they were looking for so I couldn't do it. This time round there's a lot more guidance, and also I'm 30 years older and more experienced, and it's given me a bit of a self-confidence boost.

Talking of self-confidence boosts, I was rather delightedly surprised (or surprisedly delighted) that Supermodel got such a good reception - thank you to everyone who's read, kudos'd and commented! I've been feeling a bit invisible in fandom lately, but you've all really helped me feel better. Perhaps a tiny bit tempered by the almost-resounding-silence that greeted the greatest treasure you could ever hope to find, but hey. XD I've long suspected that the Barduil fandom prefers modern AUs to canon-'verse, and this pretty much bears it out. Extra-special thank you to everyone who kudos'd and liked that one!!

I've nominated a few pairings and fandoms for the Rare Pairs Exchange and am rather looking forward to signups and assignments...

That'll do for now! And a reminder that I'm taking prompts for Barduil Month so if anyone wants to request a fic or two, please feel free!

#five good things #my writing

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pb-dot · 3 months

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Past/Current/Next Tag

Don't think I've seen this tag yet, well, before @dyrewrites tagged me in it at any rate.

Rules: Write about three WIPs, past is a WIP you stopped working on/finished; current is a WIP you're currently working on; next is a WIP you want to write

I tag: @bard-coded @lordfenric-writes @stesierra aaaaaand @cat-esper

Past

There'll probably be more work to do on it as I move toward publishing, but for now my work at The Clockwork Boy is done. TCB is a Clockpunk Queer Romance story about Love, Belonging and Revolution. The story follows Jake, a gearcrafter journeyman in a city stuck in a peculiar anarcho-capitalist stasis. Jake's tedious yet stressful life is upended as he (quite literally) runs into 13, a former assassin with a clockwork-powered body who seeks desperate sanctuary from the pursuit of his former employers.

Jake and 13 flee, both from the clockwork assassins and from the local brute squads, until they find themselves under the auspices of a worker's coop known as The Northwest. Their new allies prove vital shelter and help as Jake works to repair 13's clockwork body, but the heat it attracts to the organization has the two questioning whether they need to flee while they can or rise up to fight for their new friends.

A snippet:

“I suppose we should turn in for the night,” Jake said after a while. “I’ve got some gears I’d like to try carving tomorrow, and if you’re not doing anything else, I’d love to see if they fit the way they’re supposed to.” 13 yawned. “That does sound like a good idea.” “Oh, I got loads of those,” “Oh yeah, like?” 13 asked, a slight teasing note in his voice. “For one, I once got the idea to throw away my shitty job and terrible apartment to go chasing after this clockwork cutie. Best career decision I’ve ever made if you ask me.”

Current

My current tormentor obsession maddening descent WIP is a Queer Horror story about Art, Obsession, Madness, and Love. Our protagonist is an obsessive San Francisco art critic by the name of Oscar Skerry. Oscar's obsession centers on the works of one Tomasz Gildebrant, a reclusive artist whose bleak, rough paintings go for exorbitant prices due to their sheer cult appeal. As Oscar follows up on the thread of the urban legend known as Gildebrant Psychosis, how the paintings can provoke behavior in certain viewers that is either disturbingly violent or merely extremely odd, Oscar finds himself invited to Gildebrant's home. Warning bells should ring, but Oscar pays them no heed and wastes no time traveling to the secluded spot in the Carpathian Alps where he meets the artist he sometimes sees in his dreams. Tomasz seems almost too gregarious and welcoming at first, hardly the dark soul Oscar expected at all, but the things that don't quite add up keep piling on. Gildebrant lives alone, so who owns all the shoes that litter his entryway, why does every door in the house lock automatically at midnight, and why does Oscar keep dreaming about colors that don't exist?

This and much more will be revealed in His Impossible Brushstrokes, a standalone novel that asks you to consider what would happen in the opening of Dracula if the titular character and his victim Jonathan Harker fell in love, or if the master the Beast from Beauty and The Beast served was entirely less comprehensible than a magical rose.

Snippet:

At one point that night, I had fallen asleep. I couldn’t be certain it had happened before the gray hours of morning, but I had fallen asleep and I had slept. I knew this because I woke up, which traditionally required one to be asleep at some point. My body was stiff after the strenuous hike the day before, my brain was foggy from the jetlag, and my heart was certainly feeling in need of some sort of maintenance on account of the situation being somewhat confusing. That did, however not change that I was alive, I was in the home of who I considered to be the premier artist of our time, and he seemed genuinely happy to have me here. Granted, he also had some hair-trigger mood changes I’d need to work around and I had conflicting emotions about the whole setup.

In a way, none of this was entirely unexpected, I told myself. Gildebrant considering himself a fan of mine threw me quite a bit, but it was a nice sort of surprise so I wasn’t going to complain about that. The question, however, remained. How were I to proceed. Did I, strictly speaking, have a plan? In a way, I did not. I had wanted to meet Gildebrant, but I had assumed it’d take a long time, that I’d have a lot of time to figure out how to act, what to ask about, and ask for. Then there was the question of Gildebrant’s occasional brusqueness meant I had to be careful.

Some care, I decided as I sat up in bed and scooted my legs off the side of the bed, was perhaps called for. Gildebrant seemed quite comfortable with my company as long as the topic of his art wasn’t brought up, although I would concede that my sample size was rather limited. For now, it would be smart to keep things personal, develop some sort of baseline. If nothing else, it’d allow me to chart out the waters a little, figure out what it was that made this odd artist tick. I could work my way into the more academically valuable stuff later, and if not, securing some autobiographical details would certainly be something I could use in my works. I certainly wasn’t going to bring up xenosemiotics anytime soon, that seemed foolhardy in light of last night.

I haven't yet decided on what my next project should be, but I do have some strong candidates. The Clockwork Guardian, the sequel to The Clockwork Boy, is on there for sure, but I may postpone that if my efforts to publish go nowhere. I also feel like writing more horror, so the socially conscious folk horror Draugr (working title) or the horror-fantasy Monsters, Slayers (working title) might also be good alternatives. I also have a bureaucracy-fairytale procedural with the title Department of Troll Affairs that I might pull the trigger on.

My strongest candidate, though, is the "30s-punk" deconstructionist postapocalyptic fantasy novel The Town Called After. It's about a group of people that, as kids, went on adventures in faraway magical realms. Now, 20 years later they're all adults, and finding themselves longing for the simplicity and potential of those magical adventures. One should, however, be careful what one wishes for, as our heroes find themselves pulled back into the magical realms, only to be told they are all destroyed.

Something incomprehensible shattered the magical realms and the few survivors have bandied together to create the city of After, a ramshackle town and community from salvaged parts of their old world. These survivors now plead for the help of these, the heroes of their legends. Our protagonists seize the task in the hope of reclaiming their lost glory, but find that things aren't as simple as they remember. Politics and corruption suffuse every level of this fledgling society, and crime born both of desperation and greed intertwine and intermingle in a way that makes it nearly impossible to separate one from the other. In addition to these moral qualms and finding out what being a hero even means in such times of toil and hardship, our heroes must uncover the truth of the calamity that shattered the worlds, lest this new home share their fate.

#writing #writeblr #the clockwork boy #hearts in clockwork #tag game

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docilepillow · 3 months

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2024 February Media Post Thingy : Featuring Movies Also

I've never really liked doing editing " do-overs". i think if this was like a normal year with no leaping ( As of starting this post a couple of minutes ago ( 4:51 PM ) , i only just learned that this year was a leap year? Just goes to show how little i pay attention..! But yea, on topic, on topic, i don't look back to edit these kind of thought pieces after i write them, it'd feel odd to do so, ,and january's post was a mile and a half to write , so, after finishing the Big Thing for this year, i'm starting the writing on this on the 28th so i dont have to finish it all in one sitting this time. I'm not sure when i'll drop or pick up on it, and its not like, done Live with the month, so the actual timeline of things won't be completely perfectly accurate, but anyways : the things covered here are in rough sequencial order, mostly focused around New Media i've tried this month, with an added blurb about anything ive revisited this year at the very end. I'll try to add a blurb about everything, but no guarentees. Also, i said i'd have more screenshots to share, but i forgot again. A significant number of games here were also on 3ds which i have no good way to get screenshots for. planning is hard This month was heavily characterized by the absolutely wonderful time i had for my birthday and the days surrounding it, because wow, am i in love with my boyfriend! after many, many months spent long distance, i'm extremely glad to say that the first few days of this month were absolutely heavenly, and i do absolutely "get" all the lovey dovey emotional stuff that surrounds it. While he was over, we got to watch a whole bunch of different movies and such, and most of the video game focus was directed towards one big game, being God Of War Ragnarok, which is an absolute behemoth of a triple a game and also one aattached to the very sentimental god of war that i've also shared with him in the past ( they're some of his favorite games of all time, and he's especially knowledge on Norse stuff, so it's cute to listen to him ramble about it whenever actual mythology stuff comes up. Its absolutely adorable the way his voice lights up..! ) So, you'd expect the first piece of media i got through this month would be God of War Ragnarok, after all the time i've spent hyping it up already, while it's still fresh in my mind as of typing, And i'm on a massive, sentimental tangent on it, But...! TRUMP VS ILLUMINATI < Least Romantic Movie I've Personally Made Out With Someone Over >

theres not all that much to say on this movie as the title'd show, actually, and, obviously, the movie's a complete joke, through and through ( the titular protagonist isn't even the real deal, he's just a clone of the guy who lives on mars for whatever reason as the last human alive (?) ); and it's so ameturishly put together that i'm almost certain the entire scripting process of it was put together by looking at the title of the movie and quipping in a discord call brainstorming for a couple of hours, but it's absolutely great for virgining couples beccause you'll want to watch the movie for a bit, a bit that's been going on for i want to say little over three quarters of a year, but then, when you actually get to watching, it, you'lll both decide unilaterally to make out sloppy style instead of watching the movie, wow!

by the way, most of the movie is just weird little stock models talking at each other for what i rememeber being 50 or so minutes. i dont tihnk this is a good movie buut i thought itd be funny to bring up because in a shirtless daze after watching it i had the mortifying realization that this shitty movie was gonna be on the top of my media diary if i chose to go through with it . so here it is ! ! ! CATS & DOGS < tulpa movie >

idk what to blurb about this movie i think its entertainment value comes from the varied" WHAT DOES THIS IMPLYYY " moments in the movie and how like

excessively silly it is im not sure if it was this movie in particular but i have a very specific anecdote of this movie as a child before my parents divorce where i was actually Forced to watch it for some reason with my dad and with an anecdote like that the only thing i can think to say about it is that i think i actually enjoyed it more then Wonka theres some puppetry with the cat villain in this movie thats actually pretty endearing actually. its a decently entertaining spy movie. DOCTOR STRANGE

not having a title for this one isnt like reverence or anything i still watched this with my boyfriend in our little place and it was very enjoyable, and, in particualr, this was actually the first movie i watched of this list that i actually wanted to seek out to watch, actually! i've never been an mcu guy ( And, if you expect my movie reviews to professionalize, with like, research on the actors anything, you're dead wrong, i think , also. i think when it comes to assosiating characters with their actors or whatever celebrity or director or whatever, i just. .dont do that. i can see why normal people do but i dont have that built into me. so if i refer to a character it'll be for their character. ) i think this is a good movie i think this is a neat movie i think this a very pretty movie and i like mister stranges arch alot and i think it was really well characterized and enjoyable and id watch this movie again sometime maybe. im not a live action head but i think this movie just looks cool and is well presented in general. i think as an asshole mister strange is very watchable which is unusal for me cus i wince whenever characters do a thing thats like regrettable like noooo dont do that like an autistic weirdo but that wasnt really a problem with me for this movie i think its cool how this prick gets grounded by the fantastical shit in the movie and i think his little mini arch over the movie really stands out as a good character piece. thats all i have to say about it as someone who doesnt super hero movie this movie movies really good and stands on its own. i think its cool. i think this is a very enjoyable movie. i think people should watch it if theyre on the fence on it beingg mcu bc i dont think its like thoose other movies at all. im repeating myself. w/e Alot of early febuaary is characterized by movies bc i want to make it clear that the main game i played in that arch of time was God of War, and there were very much Not Media things that were more pressing for my time. lol VIDEO GAMES!!!! VIDEOVERSE < Most Heartwarming Eboy Game >

the docism i picked for this game sounds demeaning but thhis game is absolutely worth i think everyones time and if theres a game from febuary i'd make as a general reccomendation to my friends, it'd be this one, i think! it's an absolutely heartwarming narrative about an early 2000s era internet community that's being shut down, and its very resonant to at least Me, as a wii u / 3ds era fan

though it kinda melds that kinda stuff with a more early internet aestetic , which i think the combo works Really Well in terms of like vibe alone. the game is very naked with how it presents an early internet community and id describe it as being like hypnospace outlaw but without you the player being in the seat of like an internet moderator. Like you can moderate in the game a little bit but it's much less of a focus compared to the being in a game community with your friend aspect

this games a very well executed narrative about this emmet guy ( in the image above this one, he's on the far left of the screen ) and playing it as the first non GOW game of the week was definitely a choice i made that made me kinda sappy and clingy ( since its very much about the internet anxiety of losing a bunch of friends you care about due to dumb internet social media crap, which feels pretty well timed with this whole tumblr drama going on. also, as someone in a long distance relationship, the romance thing in this game also is pretty relatable in parts )

idk! its a very short game. i played it on deck and it was a very short but sweet pair of game sessions. i think if u like what you see here i reccomend giving it a shot if you're looking for a visual novel . ithink it is cute. if you like cute things this game is for Cute PRINCESS REMEDY IN A WORLD OF HURT < cute em' up where nobody has to die ! >

i actually falsely appraised this as gameboy color style when its supposed to be dos evokative. i knew i was missing something.

this is a free top down shmup game from steam about a cute healer girl! the game has really cute writing and is about an hour long. i think the writing makes it worth giving a try if you have an afternoon! the final boss is litearlly a guy with Every Disease that also has a refrence to ff6, so me being charmed by this game was kind of a given. Oops! I think more people should look at this game! it's worth it !

also, since everyone in the world of hurt has some kind of injury for you to remedy, some of the ones that get picked out are pretty amusing, also. its usually structured around " heres the problem with me " dialogue and " thank goodness im better " dialogue. this game is also for the gays because u can marry whoever you want after the credits. Yay! SUPER MONKEY BALL 3D < worst game icon ive ever seen for a video game award >

the games just kind of mediocre and the only reason i downloaded it is bc it was on 3ds and i just want to point out the games icon is Just a low resolution picture of ai ais face on a white bg. i think thats funny but the games so easy that thats pretty much the only novelty you'll extract of it if youre a monkey ball fan. oops .

something like this ive spent longer trying to find this games home menu icon then thinking about the game after playing it sorry i dodnt think this game is worth that just kind of sad

MEGAMAN XTREME

no reverence for this either pretty much all the games thatre gonna be talked about thatre on 3ds were just me looking through hshop slightly interested in something to do while waiting for my bf to wake up for more gow

all i can really say is that this game is a gameboy demake of the x games thats just slightly worse and going in with that expectation is correct but also its just Really annoying sometimes is very much a game where the levels are short and easy and the boss fights are kind of choppily designed and difficult and i think finishing this game was kind of more of an act of stubbornness then anything. theres this one boss second to last from sigma thats just killing this boss that spams 4 nearly undodgable spammy fast projectiles while you're on two tiny platforms over death spikes and i think that kind of speaks for how much id reccomend this ( not at all ) i think this is the angriest ive been at a game in a bit actually remembering it . i think i said a funny misnomer about it but i dont remember. something about this contributing to why mega man fucking died or something. im realizing i didnt actually consume alot of good media this month took a break writing this on leap day and umm FIRE EMBLEM WARRIORS ( The 3ds version ) < POPCORN VIDEO GAME >

as someone whose never played a dynasty warriors type game this was actually a little less boring then i was expecting it ? you'd assume picking the switch or wii u version would be more ideal, but, as someone whose favorite console is the 3ds , and considering it'd take less time to download to my system, i ended up picking this version. it actually runs pretty well and my only real complaint is that the character i wanted to play as is thuroughly stuck into the post game ( Celica from FE echoes ).

functionally this is kind of just a game that exists to be a stim device while you're in like a voice call or something but at that its pretty good from what ive played. used minerva for most of it and it wasnt too hard but not especially annoying either. its okay. i never got to unlock celica though ( bummed out ) and its not bad at all for somemthing i pretty much only played to pass the time between when my BF was awake to watch me play god of war, which it succeeded at. ive played every FE naturally available on the 3ds. TOM AND JERRY WILL WONKA & THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY

huh what happened howd this happen

guh MARIO MAKER 3DS

game i actually owned legitimately that i forgot i did. technically since the games are going down in a month from now this is my way on reminicing on Maker in general , but i mostly just reflected back on itt as a cute wii u memory and that cute packet that comes boxed with the game. the 100 or so challenge levels in this are neat but not Especially special. kind of existed to pad out the games i've tried and finished this year so far to an even 15. its not bad or anything, it did remind me of a few interactions i didnt know about before. maybe sometime before maker 2 goes down ill finish making that super world i started on when the game was new... putting all my thoughts togetherrrrr GOD OF WAR RAGNAROK

Igod of war ragnarok is pretty cool. for context, im pretty sure the first game of the i wanna say ps4 " duo " of norse GOW games are the two video games that both started me on my ps4 journey recently and got me and my boyfriend together? which i think is very sweet its also very unexpected cus other then being a soft mythology nut i dont see how id get into these kinds of games naturally, considering i'm less genre savvy when it comes to i guess " modern-style " story focused 3d adventures. Considering i'm a nintendo head, these could count as some of the only super duper gamerhead games i've ever played? though i don't know if it means anything when i say that . i think this game definitely needs the groundwork of the first gow to stand up, but, thats not a bad thing, its a very well thought out start to end NARRATIVE, and its a really good one at that. lots of well thought out character interactions and setpieces,a friend of mine described it as a universal ride-style game , and , in terms of linearity, it kind of IS that, but in like the most postive way i can think of in terms of the kinds of games i play , this is probably the drop-dead most prettiest game i've ever looked at from start to finish ( When it comes to detail and realism, i mean. .i think its very pretty to just look at the environments n stuff ) god of war ragnarok is pretty cool. for context, im pretty sure the first game of the i wanna say ps4 " duo " of norse GOW games are the two video games that both started me on my ps4 journey recently and got me and my boyfriend together? which i think is very sweet its also very unexpected cus other then being a soft mythology nut i dont see how id get into these kinds of games naturally, considering i'm less genre savvy when it comes to i guess " modern-style " story focused 3d adventures. Considering i'm a nintendo head, these could count as some of the only super duper gamerhead games i've ever played? though i don't know if it means anything when i say that . i think this game definitely needs the groundwork of the first gow to stand up, but, thats not a bad thing, its a very well thought out start to end NARRATIVE, and its a really good one at that. lots of well thought out character interactions and setpieces,a friend of mine described it as a universal ride-style game , and , in terms of linearity, it kind of IS that, but in like the most postive way i can think of in terms of the kinds of games i play , this is probably the drop-dead most prettiest game i've ever looked at from start to finish ( When it comes to detail and realism, i mean. .i think its very pretty to just look at the environments n stuff ) ( I have screenshots of the game on my ps4, but as i'm a day late to uploading this in the first place, i'm too lazy to both fetch them with my capture card and upload them to an image sharing site, so here's a picture of Jalla, a cute cow critter you get to ride in the game thaat made me very happy . )

I've heard of games that take up entire segments of people's lives for months , and while i've played lots of " longer " games, gow despite being shorter then something like SMT 4 is definitely one of the first games i've played thats been defined like that to me. i dont wanna say too much on the plot because i think these games are worth playing back to back on their own merits, though for me the experience definitely was raised above by , you know, sharing it with the love of my life, haha. its very cute to listen to someone visibly light up when talking about a game and its definitely my boyfriends infectiousness for the game that motivated me to keep coming back to it and dig for all the little details, even if i play 3d games like this like a game's journalist.... but yea god of war is really good i dont want to spoil anything on it but even if you haavent played the past games but have a ps4 and an appreciation for storytelling, i'd definitely reccomend it. Surprisingly cozy, heartfelt story on parenting and war and lingering regret n junk. also i like mimir alot hes silly and brok theres alot of characters in this i like alot

if you know you know TERMINATOR 2

oh yea i watched terminator 2 also very gripping very cool top moms in media for sure i can see why this is a classic movie it abosluely rocks and i was technically present for the voice call where they watched the first movie but i wasnt paying attention to it at all whoops thats technically the last of the new media i did but i also tried out a pokemon X nuzlocke and i replayed king of cards which was really fun and i remembered how much i liked madam meeber

the nuzlocke was a disaster but i actually did do it so winner

im sure there was other stuff too but im tired of typing and i forgot CLICKING SEND!!!!!

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moonlight-prose · 2 years

Text

✦BOYS LIKE YOU | WHITE LIGHTNING AND WINE✦

a/n: yeah....so with the enabling of @karasong and me watching stranger things i've finally realized i am in love with this guy. of course me being an au addict i had to shove him into an au. so i hope y'all enjoy the start of this electric love story! i haven't been this nervous to post a fic in awhile, but i'm worried i didn't do him justice. this was also edited briefly between the hours of 4-5am so there's probably many mistakes.

summary: bandmates don't fall in love - there was so much evidence behind it (take stevie and lindsey), but there was something about eddie munson that made your heart throb.

word count: 6k

pairing: eddie munson x fem!reader (nickname baby is used but no description is given.)

warnings: explicit so MINORS GO AWAY, cussing, pining, mentions of alcohol consumption, smoking, mentions of drugs, masturbation, pillow humping (don't look at me), voyeurism, a tiny bit of angst.

next chapter | masterlist

He could remember the first night he saw you.

Standing amidst the crowd, watching the band with an expression he would later come to see every night as you played, and for a moment he swore your pupils were the same as a cats. Either that or his own eyes were playing tricks on him. Really he only caught your stare for a fleeting second before his turn was up—his fingers practically dancing across the strings. The rest of the night was a blur of alcohol and getting high in the dressing room, but that one moment…yeah that was seared in his mind.

One day later you showed up—funnily enough—standing on his front door stoop, the Hellfire flier in her hand. The words Wanted Drummer were shoved back in his face as you handed it to him, a determined glint in your eyes that told him—you weren’t leaving until he gave you an audition. Sure…they were looking for a drummer, but he wasn’t sure if you wanted to be an unknown band. Although he learned quickly to eat his words when you just so happened to be…the best fucking drummer he’d ever heard.

He barely even handed you the sticks before you were mimicking the intro to Van Halen’s Hot for Teacher. His guitar following your lead minutes later. Eddie was embarrassed to say he got hard watching you—hair flying and eyes shut—as you went on instinct alone. He’d seen drummers before, even allowed them to audition, but you…the way you became possessed by the music. He couldn’t even call it such a simple word like hot, because that sight alone was so much more. Why you wanted to be a part of his band…he had no idea.

Although with his recent luck he learned one thing. You don’t question when talent was shoved in your face, ready to follow you on the path of rock and roll.

Two and half years later and the small garage band Hellfire became well—an overnight sensation. People claimed it was Eddie’s guitar solos that could draw people to tears and send an audience roaring that did it, but even he had to give a majority of the credit to you. The only drummer who could keep up with his fast paced playing and still keep going long after he finished. Even after so long, you could still impress him with your skills. Your power was music—that now stood clear to him—but if he had to describe what other power you possessed it’d be impossible to explain.

You were a god in the shape of a woman and he was seconds away from worshiping at your altar.

The crowd's echoes filled the air behind you as the band exited stage left. You shoved your drumsticks in your back pocket of the leather pants they almost didn’t let you wear, and wiped the sweat off your forehead. A one hour show had somehow turned into three, leaving you both exhausted and exhilarated; high on the energy of the crowd. The others couldn’t say the same. Eddie looked like he was ready to pass out as he wrapped a cold towel around his hands—attempting to avoid cramps in his fingers. Although knowing him, he’d be up just as long as you. Steve collapsed on the couch, his shirt dropped on the ground and Robin…well you never know where she went off to after shows.

A part of you wondered if she secretly had a girlfriend, but you weren’t one to make assumptions.

“Great show guys!” You bit down on your tongue as Jeffery, your manager waltzed in the door. His hair was bigger than Eddies and he always wore a velvet red tux to shows claiming he needed a signature style. Really a part of him envied the four of you, never having been able to get his own band from the 70s off the ground.

Jeffery was an asshole.

It didn’t take a genius to see it.

“Thanks Jeff,” Steve mumbled into the couch cushion, his eyes shut tightly.

You wanted to bet he’d down a shot of vodka, smoke a blunt and pass out for the night. It was his nightly routine.

“Listen, I wanted to talk to you guys about your next show.” Jeff pulled up the chair in the corner of the room. “Steve, Eddie, you guys are doing phenomenal. I already told Robin about what she could do better and Baby—”

“What we could do better?” you cut him off. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean Jeff?”

He floundered for words, his eyes darting to Eddie who smirked to himself and Steve who was already passed out. “I just mean…well in terms of your clothing…”

“Don’t tell me…I don’t fit the heavy metal standard of the 1980s. No wait, I mean I don’t fit the feminine standard of what Jeff wants.” He’d said it before with enough conviction to have you ready to lug your platforms at him. “Jeffery, you can stick your standards and shove them up your ass.”

Eddie laughed. Clasping his hands together he leaned forward. “Jeff man, Baby’s style isn’t important. We dress how we want to dress because the music is the most important thing.”

“Yes but the sale revenue on records—”

He rolled his eyes. “I’m pretty sure if Steve went on stage in a fucking leotard it wouldn’t help us anymore than it would hurt us.”

“Looks are not everything,” you said, loudly propping your platforms on the coffee table. “I’m sure Robin told you the exact same thing.”

Jefferey fumbled for words again, his eyes darting to Steve as if asking for any semblance of help. “She didn’t exactly give me a response.”

“Oh?” That made you curious. You were nearly certain that what Robin had to say was a variation of what you and Eddie were already telling him. The incessant need to constantly change who you were to fit in drove you up the wall, but hey…it was the 80s.

Although you supposed that didn’t make it any better.

“Jeff—” Steve sat up, his eyes bleary with lack of sleep. “We’re tired and we’ve got to hit the road in exactly…”

“One hour,” you finished for him.

He thanked you. “One hour. And Eddie is driving which means the ride will be horribly bumpy—”

“Hey!”

“So please, give us some time to rest.”

Biting back the smile when Jefferey finally relented, getting up from his seat, you felt a wave of ease push all the weight off your shoulders. For a week you’d be stuffed in the bus with the three people you were closest to; sleeping in motels along the way. Thankfully your next show wasn’t for another two weeks. Which gave you exactly five days to explore the city of New York once you arrived. Somehow Jefferey managed to book Hellfire to play at CBGB—a once in a lifetime opportunity.

The night was going well and you weren’t one to let Jeff of all people to deter it. So, with a huff you stood and reached for the pack of cigarettes on the table. Right where you left them. Steve would fall back to sleep and Eddie would most likely get high until he could sleep. You swore he suffered from insomnia, but just never bothered with figuring it out—either way he’d fall asleep soon. Which left you to wait until the leftover adrenaline left your system and you could knock out until the sun came up fully.

“What’s on the agenda once we hit the road?” you asked, inhaling so deep you could feel the burn at the bottom of your lungs.

Eddie shifted to the couch where you returned to your seat, flopping down beside you and stealing the cigarette from between your lips—the red lipstick stain on the bottom of it now transferring to his lips. You’d thought of smearing his lips in red a different way…many times. But nothing ever happened on the nights where you got high together, where space wasn’t an issue and he smelled like you the next morning. Your perfume, mixing with his cologne—a scent you’d like to personally bottle.

The stirring in your stomach at seeing him take a long drag and blow it out of the corner of his mouth was what made you break eye contact. Heat spread up the base of your neck and into your cheeks.

Bandmates don’t fall for each other. It was a rule more than anything else.

For as long as you’d known Eddie you held the makings of a crush that you never let get too large. Admiring him as a guitarist and frontman was one thing. Wishing you could have him as more than simply a friend was an entirely different thing altogether. In a way, this friendship was better. You could quell the ache in your body that increased simply by being near him; forget for a moment that he was who you longed for. So, you took another drag of the cigarette and did what you did best.

You forgot for a brief amount of time about those vexing feelings.

“There’s a hotel an hour away from the city we’re stopping at.”

“Fancy I hope.”

He laughed, tapping the side of the cigarette—the ash falling onto the sleeve of his jacket. “It’s… Yeah I’m not gonna lie to you Baby it’s a shithole.”

Spluttering, you coughed to rid yourself of the damn burn that built up in the back of your throat. Laughing and smoking at the same time never went well for you, but when it came to Eddie you knew he’d suffer the same fate as you. One look in his direction and sure enough…he was laughing too. You hadn’t even started on the blunt you knew he kept in his right pocket, stashed between the last few cigarettes in his pack, yet you were giggling like you were high.

A part of you blamed how close he sat to you—his thigh pressing tightly against yours.

“Please tell me it has a cheesy name to go along with it.”

“I unfortunately can’t tell you that.”

The pout formed on your lips before you could control it. “I’m going to take a wild guess and say it’s called Motel.”

“You would be correct,” he replied. “I wanted to rent out a castle, but in the middle of nowhere they’re hard to come by.”

Laughing, you shoved him as he exhaled a cloud of smoke. Dangerous didn’t even begin to describe what this relationship was—a friendship on the very edge of becoming something more. You would be lying if you said you didn’t want anything out of this. For weeks tabloids had begun asking you the big question. Were you in a relationship with your bandmate? Did you love Eddie Munson as more than a friend? What was the scoop? That’s part of why you avoided the topic of your relationship with him; also because the thought of finally admitting what you felt terrified you to your very core.

Did you love Eddie? No. You didn’t.

You cared about him as a friend, bandmate, someone who you gave your sunsets and sunrises to. But love has always been a delicate word with a lethal meaning. Considering it was a journey on its own. One you were not yet willing to take.

“We better get ready to go,” Eddie said, tamping the cigarette out. “Hey Harrington.”

The mumbled response from Steve let you know he’d need some incentive to get up and actually head out to the tour bus. Eddie glanced at you, a knowing smile on his face, before reaching for the glass of water that was placed on the snacks table. It may have been awful of you to do this, but there wasn’t really another option. When Steve fell asleep, nothing could wake him up. You backed up as Eddie crouched beside him, the water glass tilted dangerously above Steve’s head and with one last tip of his hand you watched it spill onto his hair.

“What the fuck!” Steve shot up, knocking the glass out of Eddie’s hand and watching it fall to the carpeted floor. “You two really couldn’t have let me sleep?”

“We’ve got to go man.”

“I get Eddie being a dickhead, but Baby…really?”

You shrugged, grabbing your leather jacket that was draped over the back of the chair. “I want to sleep in a bed tonight Stevie. Not on a couch.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” he muttered, dragging himself to a standing position and yanking on the jean vest he was wearing before. He looked half dead and you were partially glad Eddie was driving.

It took thirty minutes to track down Robin, grab your belongings and load up the instruments, but eventually you were sitting in the front seat of the old run down tour bus. You were surprised the thing was still running—given how long it belonged to Eddie. The engine made odd sounds here and there and the tapes sometimes got stuck, but that simply made the experience better. You wouldn’t trade anything for sitting in the front seat, singing along to the songs that Eddie chose.

Yanking the worn down cardboard box that held the band's collection of tapes you found the one you wanted, popping it into the player as Eddie turned onto the highway. Steve snored in the back, passed out on the pull out couch as Robin was holed up in the back, curled beneath a blanket that nearly swallowed her whole. This was the life you chose for yourself. A whirlwind of traveling with people who became your family, and playing as much music as possible. David Bowie’s voice echoed softly through the bus, singing Ziggy Stardust as you left the city behind and headed towards your next destination.

Your boots were traded for sneakers, the leather pants switched out for loose jeans and an oversized t-shirt that said Hellfire on it. Eddie made them long before the band became famous; you made sure to keep it in perfect condition.

“Any stops along the way?” you asked, glancing out the slightly dirty window as the moon began to shine over the darkened highway.

“None tonight,” he said. “Although when we get into the city there’s a record store that’s like a museum. They house some of the greatest records known to man and even have some limited editions that aren’t made anymore.”

You smiled, watching him talk with his hands as he explained about which records he was looking for and which demos the band could cover. All the while Bowie continued to play, the ambiance of the night solidifying the memory in your mind along with all the others that were stored in your head. There’s a reason why it was so easy to fall in love with Eddie Munson. It wasn’t the guitar playing, or the way he looked. No, it was this—his passion that bled into everything he cared about; a magnet drawing in everyone around him.

Tape after tape was placed in the player—the conversation never dying. You could talk to him for hours on end without fail and still have more things to talk about. It’s a part of why you got on so well together. But tonight you could feel the exhaustion begin to weigh on your body—the drowsiness hitting you suddenly.

You could vaguely hear Jimi Hendrix in the background strumming on the guitar, the bus continuing to bump along the road as your eyes shut. Eddie glanced over, seeing you settle further into the seat and attempting to burrow beneath your own jacket. Steve and Robin stole the remainder of the blankets—a tradition that continued to happen each time you all hit the road. He would be up for a while and so he managed to slow the bus down in order to wriggle out of his leather jacket.

“Dammit,” he muttered, turning the wheel to avoid the random ditch on the side of the road.

He loved driving the bus that you affectionately named Clank due to its excessive noise. However, he didn’t love trying not to crash the bus which became more of a difficult feat than he originally planned. Originally it was simply used to travel between neighborhoods in order to play the smaller gigs they got. Nothing fancy. But after they got signed and started traveling further and further away from Hawkins, the bus became their home. Clank was a member of the band and everyone was adamant on not giving him up.

Draping his jacket over you with one hand, he managed to keep the vehicle stable. All the while he popped another tape in the player—another Bowie song. Slower than the last few that played. According to the map that was taped to the dash on your side, it wouldn’t take too long to arrive at the motel. He longed for a hot shower and a good night’s sleep before the routine started up again.

Glancing over at you one last time a faint smile showed up on his lips as you slept soundly; the sight, one he’d keep with him like a polaroid in his wallet.

The engine died down as he pulled the keys out—startling both Steve and Robin. Fifteen minutes ago he managed to roll down the window and smoke a cigarette, but he was already in need of another one. He decided halfway through the drive that it was Steve’s turn the rest of the way. Turning towards you, he saw you still sound asleep—the exhaustion of the show too much for you to take. He knew how you felt. Part of him didn’t want to wake you up, feeling guilty about breaking your sleep, but he knew you’d wake up in pain if he allowed you to keep sleeping in the crappy chair.

Shaking your shoulder, he whispered your name, trying to be as gentle as possible. His hand cupped your cheek, thumb running along the skin and that seemed to be what woke you up. You groaned, eyes fluttering open to meet his own and Eddie swore he’d never seen a prettier sight in his life. He wanted to kiss you. Whisper how much he cared for you against your parted lips, but knew that, that would be entering dangerous territory.

A place he swore to stay away from.

Shifting, you felt a slight pain hit your neck—the awkward angle you slept in causing stiffness in your limbs. You should have waited until you got here to fall asleep. Although seeing Eddie’s eyes as your first sight after the small nap pushed away the slight annoyance, replacing it with a flurry of butterflies. You didn’t expect him to be that close to you, but there he was. Smiling at you—his thumb pressing into your cheek softly enough to elicit a sigh from you.

“Hey sleepy head,” he said, pulling away much to your disappointment. “We’re here.”

“Where’s here exactly?” Steve asked from the back, his voice deeper from sleep.

“The motel.”

Robin groaned as she stood, reaching for her bag and heading out the already open door. “This place is a shithole,” she called from outside.

You grinned, knowing that if it was her saying it…then it was absolutely the truth. Grabbing your bag, pillow, and blanket slowly you followed Steve out of the bus—nearly turning right around as you saw the state of the motel. Sure it wasn’t the Ritz but it certainly had…no appeal. The outside looked as if it hadn’t seen humanity in decades and you weren’t so hopeful about the interior. You spotted Robin talking to the manager, her instrument bag strapped to her back; she never went anywhere without her bass guitar.

“This place really is a shithole,” you muttered, staring at the half broken sign that flashed the letters MO.

“At least it’s got a cheesy name.” Raising an eyebrow you watched Eddie slip on his jacket that had been on top of you. “You’re gonna tell me MO isn’t a cheesy name?”

“I rather like the name.”

“Well there you go Baby.”

You threw a last glance at Clank, hoping he’d stay safe until the morning hours—protecting your drum-set—before heading inside. Steve tossed you the room keys, Robin having gone up already to pass out for a few more hours. You however must have gotten your third wave of energy that made your nerves jump. But even you knew that most of it was due to the way Eddie kept looking at you—glancing back to make sure you were still there. The feelings you continued to shove down never stayed down for long. In fact, they grew the longer you were near him.

“You and Eddie are sharing adjoined rooms.”

Stopping, you felt your heart rate spike. “What do you mean?”

“There’s a door connecting it.” Steve yawned, the dark lines underneath his eyes now showing prominently against his skin. “I’m going back to sleep. Try not to be too loud.”

“What do you think we’re gonna do Harrington?” you called after him, lips turning up into a smirk.

“Don’t know! Don’t care!”

You laughed, spinning around to face Eddie who was shoving the small black notebook he carried around into his back pocket. For two years you’d seen him scribble all kinds of things in there. Whether it be song lyrics, words, numbers, but you’d never truly know what was inside of it. You knew not to ask. For him it would be like asking to see the inside of a diary—the inside of a soul that should never truly be viewed by another human being. That was solely for him.

“Shall we Munson?”

He nodded, a smile flashing across his face as he trailed after you up the stairs. The motel was only two stories and you and Eddie’s rooms were next door to each other. Saluting at him, you swung open your door to see a single queen size bed with one nightstand and a desk on the other side of the room. The curtains were frayed at the bottom, the window slightly cracked, but it would do for the night. You dropped your bag on the bed, pulling out the sheets you traveled with everywhere and the extra pillow you had.

You were never one to trust the bed inside of motels that could be the star of a horror film—this one in particular bearing a resemblance to a motel you’d seen before. So, you stripped the bed and threw on the queen size sheets you brought, your two pillows going on top. It wasn’t much, but it would do.

The door that was nestled in between the bathroom and the closet creaked open behind you, causing you to jump.

“For fucks sake Musnon!”

He laughed, his head poking into the room. “Don’t worry I’m not here to murder you.”

“You scared the shit out of me!” you said, tossing a shoe at him. It hit the wall with a thunk, making him laugh harder.

“Should I keep it locked or…”

Shrugging, you thought about the possibility of keeping it open all night. You’d shared a room with him before. Hell you shared a room with the entire band before, all crammed in tight together, but this felt different. As if the line you’d both been walking on was suddenly hazy. Until you could no longer tell the difference between dating and just a friendship. You glanced at him, seeing the same look in his eyes that he’d worn the first time he saw you play—the look you dreamed about at night.

“Up to you,” you said, reaching for the t-shirt you slept in.

The bathroom door shut softly and you caught sight of yourself in the mirror. You could see the tiredness in your eyes, your red lipstick now gone from when you’d put it on earlier. The show was a success, each song performer perfectly, and that alone is what made up for the exhaustion. What made you smile even though you felt like you’d still feel this way tomorrow. You began to wash your face and arms, cleaning yourself of the day’s grueling activities. You’d shower in the morning, too worked up to actually do anything except lay down tonight.

Eddie had left the door cracked a tiny bit open—a bold move on his part—but one you found you didn’t mind. His bed was probably mirrored to your own, far enough away to not see you or hear you. Good enough, you thought.

“Goodnight Eddie,” you whispered as you fell back into the bed, your eyes trained on the pale white ceiling.

An hour and a half. That’s how long you’d been staring up at this fucking ceiling, trying to go to sleep. You couldn’t figure out why your mind still raced, your body more alert than it had been this morning. All you knew was that if you didn’t sleep soon, you’d be in hell tomorrow—having to drive at least a quarter of the way to the city. You couldn’t drive the bus on no sleep. Not after the last near accident you got in after the show in Kentucky; sleep deprivation going on the third day.

Letting out a frustrated sigh, you kicked the blanket off, your mind going back and forth. No matter how many times you tried to focus on just sleeping, it continued to fall back on the one thing you couldn’t stop thinking about. Eddie. For some unknown reason you couldn’t stop yourself from replaying the conversation on the couch. There was nothing special about it, nothing different from every other conversation before, but every time you thought about it…your heart raced.

You sighed again. “Fuck it,” you muttered.

Dragging the t-shirt up, you slipped off your underwear and felt how wet you were. The thoughts of him, of what you wanted to do with him, continued to play in your mind, causing your insides to tingle. You were an impatient person with a voracious need for relaxation and you didn’t hesitate to slip your fingers in between the axis of your legs. Sighing softly as your fingertips ran up your slit with a gentleness only you could give yourself.

You were practically dripping into your palm as you quickly found your clit, circling it slowly with measure strokes. It wouldn’t take you long at all to get off. Only you felt something shift in your body—the incessant need to be filled—and knew that tonight might be harder than others. Biting down on your lip to smother your moan, you pressed harder on your clit, sliding your slick up onto it with practiced ease. Heat spread from your chest down to your stomach, your muscles tightening with each swipe of your fingers, but it wasn’t enough.

Whimpering, you sunk your middle finger into your pussy and felt your walls immediately clamp down. The slick sound of you pumping into yourself echoed off the walls and you should have been embarrassed at it. Should have stopped, but you couldn’t. Not when the orgasm was building up in your veins.

Adding a second finger, you sped up the thrusts of your hand, pressing your palm down on your clit for the added friction. By now you would have been closer than before. Only it just kept building and building; the pleasure mounting until you couldn’t discern where it started and you ended. Three more thrusts into your pussy and you were ready to scream in defeat—the pleasure fading the more you tried to grasp for it.

“Fuck,” you spit, trying to keep quiet, fearful of Eddie hearing you.

You were panting by the time you got to your knees, your slick coating the top of your inner thighs. The room felt hot, but you knew it was the built up adrenaline in your veins causing it. Still you yanked off the t-shirt, discarding it to the side as you reach for the spare pillow you brought. You’d only been so desperate to do this a few times before, but tonight you couldn’t turn away the opportunity. It had been weeks since you got a room to yourself; the budget only gave you enough for two rooms maximum.

Straddling it you felt the seam press against your already soaked pussy, your pulsing clit pressing against it lightly and you wanted to sob with relief. If you had the time, you’d bring yourself to two maybe three orgasms, but tonight wasn’t about that. Tonight you simply needed what would be the equivalent of a quickie. You wondered why you didn’t find someone after the concert; a cute guy to help you scratch that itch that was building up in your body.

Except then you saw his face in your mind. His brown eyes that stirred your insides up and made you want to tell him the truth about how you felt.

“Eddie,” you sighed, rolling your hips down and biting back a moan as sparks jolted up your spine.

Your breath stuttered, catching in your throat as you continued, the seam of the pillow running against your clit better than your fingers could. Your eyes fluttered shut, hands running up your naked body to toy with your own nipples. Suddenly your mind formed an image of him. Of his hair spread out on the bed as you rolled your hips not against a pillow but against his tongue that eagerly lapped at your pussy. A moan escaped you—soft enough to remain silent—and you bit down so hard on your lip you swore you tasted copper.

It didn’t matter. Nothing mattered when you could feel the building orgasm starting to grow again in your body. Your walls clenching down around nothing as you tugged on your nipples. Hips stuttering and heat filling your body, you welcomed the nearing release. Begged for it. Your movements became quicker—more stunted—as you chased what you desperately needed; his name, another breathy moan on your lips.

“Fuck, fuck,” you whispered, falling forward onto the bed and digging your nails into the sheets.

The bed springs were squeaking slightly, the breath leaving you in pants, but you couldn’t give a shit. Not when you were right there. You imagined what it’d be like to see his face between your thighs, to hear his moans as he sucked your clit into his mouth. Fuck, you even pictured him pressed you down further until his nose was buried in your pussy—your slick coating his face. You couldn’t breathe; your chest tightening with each short thrust of your hips.

“Cum for me Baby.” His voice rang in your head and finally the taught string snapped, flooding your body with a white-hot bliss.

A choked moan of his name left your lips, but you cut it off by clamping your hand over your mouth, quieting your noises so you wouldn’t wake him up. Even as your thighs shook and your pussy pulsed, your orgasm rushing through you, you continued to remember that this wasn’t supposed to happen. You shouldn’t have let it get this intense. Not when he was asleep in the other room.

Finally you felt your walls stop clenching around nothing, the steady thrum of pleasure in your body dulling down until you were able to gather your bearings again. You sighed in contentment, feeling the exhaustion return after so long and knew it wouldn’t take you long at all to fall asleep.

Only you never truly noticed the man standing (practically leaning) against the wall as he tried to remember how to breathe. Eddie had gotten up when he heard his name, thinking you were having a nightmare. You got them frequently over the years—even though you liked to pretend you didn’t, but now he was the one who couldn’t move. He knew it was wrong to watch as you brought yourself to an orgasm; knew that he should have shut the door the second he saw you naked kneeling in your bed.

Except…then you said his name again.

His brain short-circuited as he watched you play with yourself, your hips grinding down on the pillow like you were desperate for it. Fuck, he was desperate for it—the apparent bulge in his boxers now painful from being ignored. He couldn’t tear his eyes off you; the goddess he believed you to be now proven before his very eyes. When you fell forward, your eyes fluttering shut, he nearly interrupted you to ask—almost beg—if he could taste you. Worship you on his knees and pray like a penitent soul.

Stumbling back, he locked himself in the bathroom, images of you flashing in his mind. This was wrong. All of it felt wrong. But that didn’t stop him from yanking down his boxers and wrapping a hand around his red and leaking cock. He leaned a hand against the wall, biting into his arm as he furiously pumped his length, practically tasting his release on the tip of his tongue. The way you fought against making any noise pained him. He wanted to know what you sounded like, how you felt. Eddie was trapped under your spell, but there was nowhere he’d rather be.

“Fuck Baby,” he sighed, swiping his thumb along the tip of his cock, spreading his own precum downwards.

He could feel the tendrils of his orgasm begin to wrap around his body, shoving him forward with every pump of his hand. Biting down even harder, he knew the skin would bruise. It was inevitable at this time. But he felt no pain—the pleasure numbing his brain as he did whatever he could to chase the release that nearly made his body float. Your voice whispering his name filled his mind; the sight of you coming undone bringing him unspeakable amounts of pleasure. And with a final pain grunt, he felt his balls draw up, his cock pumping out cum all over his hand.

Eddie’s eyes shut tightly, his hips jolting forward as he imagined filling your pussy—imagined the sight of him leaking out of you afterwards. He stroked himself until pain replaced the pleasure and even then he continued until he couldn’t take it anymore. Groaning, he watched the last of his cum dribble out onto his hand, falling onto the toilet below—his body nearly shaking from the overstimulation.

It was only when he finished cleaning up, heading back out into the room and catching sight of you curled up in bed did the guilt start to settle in his stomach. The shame of what he just did now nagging at him. He should have walked away. Ignored the sight of you and he wasn’t sure what to do now. How could he look you in the eyes tomorrow? How could he laugh with you about trivial things when he knew what you looked like at the peak of pleasure?

He wanted to throw himself off the roof, burrow in the room and never come out. Running a hand down his face, he tried to calm his erratic heart beat. Except nothing would shake him out of this. Tomorrow he’d sit in the bus with you, he’d try to keep himself busy, because as much as he liked to ignore it…he knew for a fact that he couldn’t handle a world where you rejected him. And maybe that was the truly fucked up thing about all of this.

He loved you so much he was scared shitless to even admit it to himself.

Dropping into the bed, he stared at the clock that hung on the wall opposite him. He’d have to be up in a few hours with everyone else to start driving again. A never ending routine that he loved wholeheartedly, but even he knew tomorrow would be a different kind of hell. Tomorrow he’d have to once again pretend like the feelings he kept buried deep weren’t there at all. Only this time it was worse, because he finally knew something he didn’t before.

You liked him too.

#eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson smut #eddie munson fic #eddie munson oneshot #eddie munson series #eddie munson #stranger things #my writing #SHOVING THIS INTO THE VOID AND DIPPING

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musekicker · 1 year

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For your prompts (if you’re still doing those): maybe Puss is sick and Death is passing through where they are (totally unrelated, probably just a disaster in a nearby town or something) and tries to help out. Kitty, who knows for a fact that Puss just has a cold/flu, basically goes “Boi don’t you dARE-“ and Death has to reassure her that no, he’s not here for Puss; he’s not THAT eager to see him again. Kitty is still suspicious, Puss is too tired/out of it to really care.

So first finished drabble with these characters. Getting use to writing them so some of the writing may be stiff? But I like what I wrote.

It had been three days since Puss had got sick. There was a small bit of luck that he had started showing signs of being sick soon after they had reached the inn. He was coughing all night that first night. Kitty knew the next morning that they were better off staying at the inn until Puss was better. Expensive but better then having someone sick on the road.

So now Puss was sleeping in bed, his breathing raspy. Had been for days now. And his temperature was getting higher.

Kitty was more worried then she let on to Perrito. Enough that she was going to take a quick trip into town to talk with the town doctor again. As well as pick up more supplies for the sick cat.

"You stay with Puss. I'm going to go on a quick supply run. I won't be long." Kitty said.

Perrito sat up straight and nodded.

"I'll keep a good eye on him!" Perrito said.

Kitty gave one more worried glance in Puss's direction before she opened the door. Then she found there was a wolf at the door. Or rather, Death was at the door.

Kitty instantly had a dagger in paw.

"Don't you even dare-" Kitty hissed.

Death puts his hands up in a placating gesture.

"I am not here for his soul. Not his time I promise you." Death said.

Kitty was not backing down yet. Death was not on the list of those she trusted.

"Why are you here?" Kitty asked.

The wolf strode deeper into the room. His imposing form ever more frightening to the others in the small inn room. His red eyes fixed on Kitty and Perrito. Though they flickered over towards the cat in the bed for a second. That made Kitty more tense.

"There was a rather devastating fire in the town a few miles away from here." Death said. "I was busy there as you can imagine."

"Yes, I can. That still does not make you welcomed here." Kitty said. "Or explain why you stopped here."

Death just grinned.

"It is nice to see that the hero has someone that has their back" Death said. "And for why I stopped here, maybe I needed a rest."

"You? A rest?" Kitty asked, incredulous.

"Of course he does!" Perrito said. "Everyone needs to rest."

Kitty wanted to argue with Death more, but then the sound Puss moving in the bed and a slight groan told the group that Puss was awake. The orange cat blinked his bleary eyes a couple of times before he saw Death.

"Am I hallucinating?" Puss asked.

"Nope!" Perrito said.

"Is it-" Puss asked.

"No it's not your time. You have the flu and you are being dramatic." Death informed Puss.

Puss coughed before replying.

"That does sound like me." Puss admitted.

Death let out a small bark of a laugh.

"More agreeable when sick I see too." Death said.

"Why are you here?" Puss asked.

"As I explained to your friends, I was already at a disaster the next town over. You'll want to take another route to a different town when you do travel on again." Death said. "I've finished my business there and am taking a break."

"Death takes breaks?" Puss asked.

"Yeah." Kitty said, still glaring at Death and keeping herself between Puss and Death. "I don't believe that either."

Death only smirked. Kitty hissed under her breath. Before things could get more tense, Perrito spoke up.

"Do you have any stories? You have to have a lot of interesting stories I'm sure." Perrito said.

The wolf looked down to Perrito with a unusually softer expression.

"I do not think that you would like the stories I have to tell. They all end rather... well, grim." Death said.

Kitty and Puss did not doubt that.

"Aw, but you've been around so long. There has to be something you can tell that doesn't end in well.. you. Like maybe you saw a really rare and pretty flower or heard a nice song or-"

Death put up a hand to interrupt the dog, though not without a amused expression.

"I suppose I could think of something that isn't as dark as all the other stories I have." Death said.

"Yay!" Perrito cried.

Kitty and Puss could only glance at each other as Death actually sat on the floor. And before they could suggest Perrito keep his distance from Death, he ran right over to the wolf. He stopped right before him, turned in place three times as dogs did, and laid down to hear the story.

"This story is about a kingdom that no longer exists-"

Death went on with his story. All during the story, Kitty was trying to figure out Death's angle was here. Surely he was not here to just hang out. Was he?

Puss tried to stay on alert as much as Kitty was. But with how sick he was, he found himself dozing off. And Perrito was close to sleep himself. Soon it would be just Kitty and Death awake. Would Death make a move on Puss's life then?

Though if he truly wanted Puss's soul, he could had fought his way past Kitty. She would had done everything she could to protect Puss, but she knew Death would had defeated her in a fight eventually.

"- and they say to this day even though the town and it's church no longer stand, the bells of that church can be heard at night on the anniversary of the towns fall." Death said.

"That's kind of nice." Perrito said sleepily.

Death tilted his head, curious.

"How so?" Death asked.

"The town is gone but at least it's not forgotten. And they even got a ghost bell. How cool is that?" Perrito said.

Death smiled.

"You are a odd one." Death said, not unkindly.

Perrito yawned, and laid his head down. Soon enough the dog was snoring.

Now it really was just Kitty and Death.

"I still don't trust you." Kitty told Death.

Death grinned.

"That is honestly fair." he said.

Kitty didn't know how or when, but she had fallen asleep sometime during the night. Realizing that, she sat up in the chair she was slumped in and looked around the room. First she noticed that Death was gone, Perrito still sleeping in the spot before where Death had been.

Kitty could not hold back the feeling she should check on Puss to make sure he was still breathing. To see if Death had pulled a fast one on them.

She hurried over to the bed.

Puss looked to be asleep. And for a second Kitty's heart seized, sure that they had been tricked and that he was gone. She had to lean over closer to Puss's face and chest to realize that he was breathing. A little less raspier then he had been last night.

Kitty sighed in relief. She stood there at Puss's side for a few minutes until she was sastifaied that he was safe and alive.

It took another three days for Puss to feel better enough to be in any traveling condition. He barely remembered that night when Death came to visit. But both he and Kitty could agree that the whole thing had been odd.

Even odder would be the fact that this would not be their last casual encounter with Death.

#puss in boots the last wish #puss in boots spoilers

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