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srmt-zine · 7 months

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At last, some details!

(A while back on @srmthg we had a zine interest check, and it remains open for any additional suggestions/feedback about what you'd like the zine to be (you can also shoot this blog an ask) but I don't plan on doing a second interest check. If enough people feel this is a mistake, there's still time to do one, but as it stands I don't see the point. I will continue to accept feedback and take it into account moving forward!)

By the way, my name is @netbug009 and I'm your friendly head mod for this project! This will be my first time running a zine, but I've been helping run projects in this fandom for 18 years!

The Format

SRMTHG Zine (cooler name tbd) will be a free PDF zine scheduled to release on September 18th, 2024, AKA the 20th anniversary of the series' first episode!

I know a lot of folks (myself included) like to have nice, shiny, hard copies of zines, and I hope to get the zine onto a publishing on demand site such as Lulu to let people buy them at-print-cost if they'd like, but a free digital edition will be the first priority. Since this zine is a celebration of the anniversary of a relatively small fandom, I want as many people to be able to access and enjoy it as possible! Plus, this is my first time running a zine, so I think it's smart to keep it simple. This also lets us worry less about page counts - if a lot of cool people contribute cool stuff, a PDF can be a chonk as we want!

The Content

The zine will include both fanart and fan fiction (and maybe even a few QR codes to some other digital goodies like AMVs and fanmixes if there's enough contributor interest!)

Light shipping will be allowed, with a few exceptions - no adult x child and no monkey x human ships will be allowed. (This was THE overwhelming request in the interest check and is not open for debate.)

We're going for a general vibe and love the idea of getting copies into the hands of voice actors/staff, which should give you a rough idea of the type of content we're going for - if it's too creepy/fetishy to hand to Ciro at a convention, it's too creepy/fetishy for the book. (That said, Monkey Team is a very silly and weird show with a love for classic horror tropes so I hope people don't let that limit their imaginations too much if they wanna do something spoopy!)

NO AI WORK WILL BE USED OR ACCEPTED IN THE CREATION OF THIS ZINE. I hope that'd be a given but just to be 100% clear, no.

The (Rough) Timeline

March 2024 - Contributor Applications Open!

April 22nd - Zine members selected and invited to Discord

May 1st - Zine members finalized

June 1st - Zine check-in 1

July 1st - Zine check-in 2

August 1st - Zine pieces due!

September 1st - Zine layout finalization due!

September 18th - ZINE RELEASED!

You might notice this is a pretty long timeline for a zine and we're starting pretty early; because this fandom is fairly small and this is a big occasion, I want to provide extra time so that as many people can hear about the project and participate as possible.

If you're looking for something to do until contributor apps open, SIGNAL BOOST, SIGNAL BOOST, SIGNAL BOOST! Reblog, post to Twitter, tell your friends, get the word out so this can be the biggest celebration it possibly can! If you make any graphics in your quest to help get the word out, PLEASE tag this blog so they can be shared!

Aaaand that's the basics! Again, feel free to send an ask with any additional questions. If you're considering applying in January, it's never too early to start sketching/considering ideas!

#zine promo #fandom zine #srmthg #srmthfg

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henrikvanderhussy · 5 months

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Clue Crew Zine Done Cheap

The current trend in fandom zines (fandoms in general, not Clue Crew in specific) are these very fancy, professionally-printed collections of fanfic and art. Typically it's competitive to be selected as a contributor, and expensive to purchase. I'm sure they satisfy a project management itch or an "owning a nice thing" desire, but they don't satisfy my personal feelings about fandom. I want to make something for the sake of making and sharing, and the joy of creating without the pressure to make it perfect. I want to touch it with my hands and feel like I'm connecting.

I was feeling a little sad that the zines I want aren't really a thing in fandom anymore. Then I remembered that I'm the bizarre Millennial Who Owns A Printer and also I accidentally just bought way, way too many stamps*

So fuck it. Let's make a zine.

I'll print them at home and mail them out for free to anyone who wants one. If they're too large for a regular sized envelope, I'll still mail them out for free but also ask people to chip in a little money for postage if they can.

We need two things to make a Nancy Drew games zine: 1. People who want to make things for it, and 2. People who want it mailed to them.

1. Fill out this form if you want to make something for the zine. This is not a binding commitment, this is just a way for me to get in contact with you. I'll also poke people in a couple months to see if they're still interested in contributing.

2. Fill out this form if you want to be notified when it's time for me to collect mailing addresses. To be clear, this isn't an 'interest check' or whatever. As long as one person wants it, I'm going to make it. I'll also put up another tumblr post when I'm ready for addresses, but if you fill out the form, you'll get a message and won't have to worry about watching for that post.

"What can I make for the zine?" Honestly anything, as long as it centers around the Nancy Drew games and hasn't been posted publicly yet. Fanfic, meta, speculation about KEY, a puzzle, comparisons of Bess Marvin's character across different Nancy Drew media. Limit it to maybe…2500 words? I'm trying to keep this in a range that won't kill my printer.

Art doesn't really work, because again, home printer. BUT an option would be to put in a link or a QR code that goes to an art piece. And hell, if we're going to make this multimedia, it can be anything: a music composition, a podfic, a video acting out your favorite game scene with puppets. (I can help with image or audio hosting for anyone who needs it)

This is open to everyone to contribute, no restrictions or auditions. I'm setting a tentative submission deadline of February 29th (it's a leap year!), but that can be pushed back if needed.

I know it's uncomfortable to give your address to some stranger on the internet, especially since I'm newer to the Clue Crew! I've had my main blog (@theshmaylor) for ages though, and I have some mutuals there who I've met in person at various conventions who can vouch for me. I'll also make sure to collect addresses in a way that doesn't connect to your username or internet presence.

I really want to make this zine happen, so please share around Clue Crew tumblr, and let me know if you have any feedback or ideas!

*I thought I was buying 4 sheets of 6 stamps, but it turns out the sheet was folded and actually they're sets of 18 stamps, and sure I should have asked more questions about why it was so expensive but there was a big line behind me, so what was I supposed to do? Hold up the line at the post office? Of course not

#clue crew #nancy drew games #nancy drew #her interactive #clue crew zine done cheap

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heidiblack · 2 years

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Convention Artist Alley Review: Crunchyroll Expo

Convention: Crunchyroll Expo

Location: San Jose, CA

Date: August 5-7

Table cost: $323.75

Table size: 8’

Application: Juried

Fandom/audience: Anime

Items for sale: 11x17" posters (fanart and original), coloring book, zines (fanart and original), comics, pins (original), resin coasters and jewelry (including primogems), leather keychains (by my sister)

Mask policy: Required in all areas

Previously attended? Yes, in 2017.

Pros: Visiting friends in California, back in the bay area! Large, well-known property (crunchyroll) that spares little expense and makes an outright huge show, convention artist alley staff were very friendly and checked in with us regularly, smoothly run.

Cons: California so everything is expensive, tables were crammed together, audience seemed to be guys more interested in ahoge/hentai/waifu bs, allows proxy selling (including the person next to me who was selling stuff by someone else already in the alley) and no policing of work (they say they encourage original art, but someone near me had essentially traced logos on shirts they were selling), requires event insurance (only event I’ve ever done that does)

Most popular item(s): Posters (59); Zines and pins (23 each), primogems (22)

Least popular item(s): Commissions (2)

Upon entering the venue we were accosted by many helpful staff directing us exactly where we needed to go (hooray!). Vaccine card checks and masks were mandatory. As soon as we checked in the artist alley liaisons introduced themselves to us and let us know they were happy to help with anything we may need.

My friend and I set up on the thursday before the show, giving us time to go have fun in San Jose afterwards (oh how I missed California, even if it did catch fire while I was there).

I have done crunchyroll expo before on its first year (2017?) when it was in the Santa Clara convention center. I find that California shows tend to not be impressed with my work (they largely like the work of people like sakimi-chan and other digital artists). Unfortunately, the attendees were more impressed by the proxy seller to my one side and the seller on my other side who sold ahoge face masks and traced shirts.

The tables were 8’ each, which was nice, but they were also smooshed directly up to each other, making each row very packed. With many artists creating booths that wall off their sides it made each table feel very claustrophobic, and assaulted attendees with just a constant sensory stream. By the time they reached my table in the second to last row I could see their eyes glazed over - your work had to be incredibly different to entice them.

Additionally, the “guests” were these hololive AI v-tubers, which I had no merch of, and seem to attract the “stereotypical otaku guy,” who is not my audience in any way.

Crunchyroll also requires all artists to have their own event insurance (with coverage up to $2m) - they are the only show that requires this, which just adds an extra cost to an already expensive show.

I did make a commissioner cry (from happiness) when I handed her the commission I drew for her, which is always extra special.

Gross sales: ~$2000

Recommend/will attend again? It is such a big name show, but I can’t justify flying out for so little return. Had I still been local to San Jose it would have been much more affordable.

Other 2022 convention reviews:

Otakon

Gem City

Dokidokon

Anime Midwest

Anime Ohio

Huntington Toy & Comic Con

Momocon

SPACE

Causeacon

Indiana Comic Con

Ohayocon

Anime Zap (featuring 2021 review links)

These reviews take a lot of time and effort, but I think they are something the artist alley community needs! If you would like to support me so I can keep doing these, please consider donating or buying from my shops!

Help support Heidi Black by donating or sharing with your friends.

Storenvy

Etsy

#crunchyroll #crunchyroll expo #crx #artist alley #anime convention #convention #anime #artist alley review #convention review #con review #anime con

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onetiredwitch · 1 year

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I return from the ether to show you all a preview of my piece for A Couplet of Birds, the Huleth Zine! You can find info about it at https://hulethzine.tumblr.com/. Everyone has been a joy to hang out with, and I'm very grateful to have been a part of this project. There are so many other amazing artists and writers, please go check them out!!! I also wanna thank the mods and Amy for making this such a smooth process, and being so wonderful to work with and understanding. Preorders run till Dec 31st so you can still snag one as a nice holiday treat! The proceeds are going to Action Against Hunger :)

#Han's art #I am not good at this sorta deal but!!!#everyone worked really hard and i'm so proud of us!!!#fe3h #fire emblem 16 #not gonna tag spam for this #huleth

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stealiesjam · 3 months

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J. Robbins (Kreative Kontrol Interview)

For the complete interview click here

Notes by Paula Beltran. I had the chance to get swept away by the Discord community since my friend Charles, a HarDCore pioneer, did not stop talking about his concert experiences back in the day. We even watched Salad Days together with his wife Claudia who is also a dear friend of mine back in their Arlington home (Charles has it been that long?). I've always been attracted to that level of mysterious coolness. Turns out they are! Here are my notes from the interview. Edited in order to be published here. They highlight life philosophies and fun fact about J. Robbins. Good stuff.

No regular commitment

We don’t hate our customers. We love them.

Gov issue bass

Financial donations with a healthy history that leads someplace cause it’s worth it and there’s love

Everyone works from home in dc

24 years of marriage

Cheapest places to live. Grow your own garden. Community.

Maryland Institute College of Art

Connect with people and be active of finding the cool stuff. Dig.

🐯🖕🏼💘

DISCHORD community are so modest 🥹 suuuuuper cool

J. Robbins is 56 years of age.

Living our moment the young ones

Always do it better. Expand palette.

Excited for things he can’t imagine yet

Influences hi Jules 🍻

90s: post hard core

Passion and finesse

Hi hat opens and closes and has many sounds

We discover music different ways: shows, zines, etc

Resurrection: putting the band back together

Listens to the same albums for three months or something

No plan, listen what it wants to be

Music growing up: Beatles, Black Sabbath, other stuff

He was into films and film making. He was obsessed with soundtracks. Soundtrack music manipulates your emotions. Heart rate.

He studied things on his own weird way with headphones and weird stuff

Punk saved his life that nothing had to be official (credentials)

XTC - solid song craft

WHAAAAAAAT YOU GUYS KNOW ME 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

Not a lot of live band interaction during pandemic

No end in sight. Get a studio.

J's band hit record on spot: [please buy something before meeting me, me]

“I just want you to like me” we turn them off / DISCHORD

Different time

There are things that the more you listen to them the more things you discover about them. (me when I accidentally closed the podcast on my phone and had to rewind it on my computer)

You’re just being nice, you’re my friend

Paula's style bobservation: Perfectionism about art is hell. But hey it happens to j robbins and it’s just a bobservation,

GENIOS 🖕🏼🖕🏼🖕🏼🖕🏼🖕🏼🖕🏼🖕🏼🖕🏼

Relief to see friends at the end. We’re not worried about the fate of the world.

People work at different paces

Me: I’ve always dreamed of this. Community-minded-chemistry present excitement. Cool feeling 💘

Collaborative vs dictation

Rhythm

Poet on drums 🪘

Lois Carrol

Hi Jerry 🍻

Flowing in right direction. There’s only one way to go and that way is forward.

Facebook posts have good material for songs

Getting older and not taking things for granted

Dictation for things to go like they were: it never happened.

Can we not learn from this? (Totally evil means and ends)

I’m not a fascist (they are) I am a good person with good intentions

Me: Live and let live. Respect the written word. Learn how to read.

Fuck you kaiser

We'll just deny it happened ALL IS GOOD IN THE HOOD 🌈

Simplicity is real.

Just be a bee 👖

I’m gunna post this

Yay

Sharing experiences is the goal.

Home and marriage: nourishing

New record on DISCHORD CHECK IT OUT!

J. Robbin picks dead eyed god as recommendation

He wrote it very easily and he is proud of himself because of that. More about J. Robbins: "J. Robbins has been the singer/guitarist and principal songwriter in several DC-and-Baltimore-area post-punk rock bands since the late 1980s, most notably Jawbox, Burning Airlines, and Channels. He is also owner and operator of the Magpie Cage recording studio in Baltimore MD."

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tinygameroom · 3 years

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Interactive Fiction to Look Out For On Itch.io

itch.io is a trove of interactive fiction games, visual novels, and kinetic novels of all types, and I’ve run into a good handful that I think are worth highlighting (and playing again myself!)

Many of these I haven’t finished yet due to the sheer amount of content or because I went for the ending I wanted straight away, but I’d love to finish them thoroughly and perhaps review some of them in the future.

A couple notes! First, it’s been a while since I’ve played some of these games, and some of them I haven’t seen all of the paths. I try to give warnings where needed, but my warnings might not be complete as I don’t know absolutely everything in each game. Please check the games’ pages and look after yourself!

Secondly, many of these are available free, and some are for sale at a low minimum price, but I encourage you to supporter the writers, artists, composers and developers in any way you can, whether that’s giving them a follow, donating, or just leaving a nice comment. Supporting indie creators is a huge part of what this blog is about so give back to those who create things you love! Now let’s get into the list!

Visual Novels:

Hikeback is a horror visual novel about hitchhiking, time loops, and murder. It gives a lot of incentive to keep playing and replaying, as the story advances almost every time you start again, with new choices and details being revealed as it all unravels. This game is incredibly engaging and beautifully written, and lives up to the promise of time loops and meta game mechanics. I recommend this for anyone who wants a good spooky, existential story. Be warned of loud noises, jumpscares, glitch effects, blood and violence, abuse, and themes of self harm, suicide, and depression. The itch.io pge has a list of content warnings as well as a full spoilery breakdown of warnings if you need them. You can find Hikeback on itch.io here!

Nothing to Say is a Visual Novel dating sim where you go on a date with Zoe, a girl you really like. The only problem is you’re very, very nervous. In this smart little game, you’ll be limited in how many letters you can use to express yourself, and you’ll have to unlock further dialogue options by getting to know Zoe, being honest with her, and being cute together. You’ll only earn letters from dialogue options once, encouraging you to explore more dialogue each playthrough until you get all the options to fully tell Zoe how you feel. Nothing to Say is playable here on itch.io!

Text-Interactive:

The Three-Body Problem is a queer romance interactive fiction about celestial witches living in a dark, magical wood when they encounter a young stranger. It features a nonbinary character, a potential polyamorous relationship, and healthy dom/sub dynamics. I found this story sweet and charming, with likable characters and pretty, easy to follow story writing. The Three-Body Problem deals with themes of abuse in a compassionate manner, and is in large part about healing and finding people with whom you are safe. I recommend it for anyone wanting a nice queer romance read with fantasy elements. Watch out for themes of abuse and sexual themes. You can purchase The Three-Body Problem on itch.io here for $5 or play a free mobile version from Wattpad!

Raik is a deeply Scottish fantasy melded with reality. You play as a young woman dealing with anxiety and stress trying to make it through her day, while a fantasy world unravels around her. This story has layers, and all of it is beautiful. The portrayal of anxiety is poignant and real, and the writing is gorgeous. I don’t want to say anything else to spoil it, but this game is fantastic. I recommend for anyone who likes to daydream. Please be warned of themes of anxiety, stress, and panic attacks as well as some fantasy violence. You can buy Raik here on itch.io for 3 GDP (or more! Please support the author!)

Space Frog! (I saw a lunar eclipse) is a story of a frog in space. He’s a frog and he’s in space! This is a cute, short interactive fiction with low stakes, no worries, just cute adventures of a frog in space. You can direct frog as he travels and learn more about him. It has adorable illustrations and clickable text that reveals extra flavor information. I recommend to anybody looking for a smile. You can play Space Frog here on itch.io and also download a zine of the game for $2 or more!

Floor is a text-interactive game about lying on the floor. You can lie on the floor, and you can get off the floor. What you do next is up to you! This is a short game with no real stakes, just real life boredom and activities. It may evoke feelings of loneliness or disappointment, but you can also just have some hummus. Floor can be played here on itch.io!

Apple Spice Pancakes is another short game about making pancakes with your sweetie! It’s entirely wholesome and adorable. The game text is all dialogue - the dialogue you read is from your partner, and your choices are your real-time responses to them. You can help them design your perfect breakfast while being disgustingly cute. Apple Spice Pancakes is available here on itch.io!

A Witch’s Word is a romantic text game where you have made a deal with a witch, offering her your firstborn. The only problem is you don’t have a child. Or a partner. The witch is here to help. Explore three potential relationships as your witch continues to introduce you to new sweethearts, trying to find someone who you are willing to love and who is willing to give up your child. And if you don’t want any of these people the witch offers you... maybe play the game anyway. See what can happen. A Witch’s Word is available here on itch.io!

Other:

Novena is an interactive poem! It’s a pixel art game that you navigate around, interacting with parts of the environment to read through the poem, which is about the ocean, and wishes, and expectations. And compassion. It has absolutely stunning visuals and music, and the poem makes me cry each time. Be warned of some really heavy feelings, but it will do its best to comfort you. The poem takes about five minutes to read and is here on itch.io waiting for you.

I hope a few of these games are of interest to you and that I’ve inspired you to support these great indie developers! If you wanna support me and see more articles and reviews on indie games, or encourage me as I learn to make my own, you can follow me here and on itch.io and support me with donations on ko-fi! Please reblog if you like this article, since tumblr will make it very hard to find with all these links. Have a great day and play some good games!

#indie games #interactive fiction #visual novels #game recs #itchio #itch.io #interactive text games #interactive games #interactive text #indie game dev #horror games #romance games #dating sims #gaming #video games

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hillbillyoracle · 2 years

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If your boundary is such a hard line that someone can’t so much as have a feeling that might be mistaken as a challenge, that’s not a boundary - that’s a threat.

my bounderies: don't abuse me, rape me, or be a Bigot to me.

So...i should let people think it's a challenge to break me as a person? That's not fucking ok. Bounderies are important.

Every time that post gets more traction, I get messages like these. I get frustrated folks are so willfully misinterpreting what it means.

But on the flip side, they're really good artifacts of why the mindset I'm pushing back against is so wildly shitty.

People hear anything suggesting nuance, contextualizing, or appropriateness with regards to boundaries and instantly take it as a threat.

And I get that a lot of that comes from individual trauma and for a certain phase of recovery is very understandable and even encouraged.

But on a community scale, this black and white thinking that boundaries are always good and nuance is bad means people can weaponize what's effectively a neutral tool to situate their behaviors as morally good and other people's feelings as bad. Which just replicates oppressive systems inside our communities that devalue individual humans and incentivize a certain kind of rhetoric. It's hot garbage nonsense.

This is also the classic tactic - "my boundaries are the bare minimum broad categories I don't bother to define in concrete terms". So when someone says something merely harsh or unpleasant, it's easily classifiable as abuse and someone is reasonable and morally justified in their anger. They can rally a community into punishing or ostracizing a person over it. And now everyone in that community, whether they admit it or not, is now a little more afraid of interacting which becomes a barrier to community strength and intimacy.

Other people have developed much better critiques of cancel culture and how it's very much an extension of the state's influence even in Leftist and progressive spaces - check out Clementine Morrigan's "Fuck the Police Means We Don't Act Like Cops To Each Other" zine and "Fucking Canceled" podcast for more. But one thing I've not seen touched on as much is the intersection of how psychology still hasn't fully rid itself of it's carceral past and how the languages it develops can sync quite nicely cancel culture for it's own purposes.

Which brings me back to my whole point with that post - be mindful in the ways in which you use that language, especially with people who are not threats. One thing I hate about the boundary language is that it - by it's very nature - conjures images and sensations of an impending threat and a need to rally resources to defend. Which isn't very healing for those of us who've survived some truly awful shit. To go around feeling like so many people are on the same level as our worst abusers is living in hell and retraumatizing in it's own way.

An alternative? I'm not sure what others use, but I've been switching to evaluating needs, values, and concrete harms. What are my and the other person's needs right now and how are we attempting to meet them? What are our values and how are they in conflict? What concrete harms do we pose to each other if any? It might not give me the moral thrill of boundary language but you know what it does do? Calms my nervous system and helps me feel capable of maintaining relationships AND avoiding harm/getting my needs met.

TL;DR: Anon, I know this kind of anger might feel empowering, but I'd really urge you to reflect on a better outlet for it. I genuinely don't know how you took what effectively amounts to "stop taking people having their own feelings as challenges to your boundaries when it's not" and made it "so I just shouldn't have boundaries?" If your boundaries become pointless should you let folks have their own feelings about them - or you can't distinguish between feelings and behavior - there are larger issues. Please go do your healing some place that isn't my inbox.

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chibi-mushroom · 3 years

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Hey everyone! Finally get to post my piece for the memory of promises zine! check out the link here if you want to grab one of your own copies in the leftover sale! I was so happy to be able to join in on this zine, and I hope you guys enjoy all the work that went into it! (Also keep in mind this was written before MoM.)

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Namine rubbed her temples and looked at the clock. Midnight already. DiZ was not going to like this. The next time he came into the white room would bring on some lecture or punishment of some kind. She had been working furiously all afternoon trying to get past this one section of memory, but there was something that was keeping her back. Her pulse began to race. She was feeling sick. The door to the white room opened and with a squeak, Namine ducked under the table, fearing the familiar stride of the man in red.

"It's okay, it's just me. You can come out now." A soft voice sounded in her ears. "You're safe. DiZ said he needed to run an errand and wouldn't be back for a couple of days."

Slowly looking up, Namine could see the outstretched hand of the only comfort she had in this lonely place. "Riku. You're back."

She took his offering and stood up. He hadn't let go of her hand just yet, blindfold still covering those beautiful blue green eyes he had. She was glad it stopped him from seeing things like her girlish blush. He was only offering his hand as a friend. Besides, it was wrong for her to want to be with him- nobodies weren't supposed to feel anything. So why did she?

"You're shaking." Riku stated simply. "Have you eaten anything today?"

So he could even feel the slight tremor in her hands. "No, not exactly."

"Do you want me to get something for you? I think there are some leftovers in the fridge."

"No, I'm alright. I have to get back to work." Namine tried to take her hand from his, but he held onto it all the tighter, leaning down a little to be at eye level with her.

"You were working when I left, and I can tell you haven't gotten any sleep. How are you expecting to take care of Sora when you can't take care of yourself?"

Right. Namine thought. He's just like DiZ. All he cares about is getting Sora restored. You're just a tool.

Still, she couldn't help but notice the way her breath caught in her throat as his blinded eyes sunk to meet her tired ones. Maybe she should take a small break. All of this stress was making her read too much into small gestures.

Namine simply nodded, and Riku left to warm her up some food. Sensing that going back to Sora's memories would be futile, she grabbed her sketch pad and turned it to the very last page. This was her secret page, covered in things she thought about. Mindless doodles she drew when she was waiting for the computer to check on Sora’s physical well-being.

The sketch pad was not necessary for her magic to work. She could rearrange memories- crush the hearts of her poor unsuspecting victims- without it. She used it though to help her concentrate. By visualizing the memories, she was able to make a more convincing edit or capture the feelings that were hiding beneath the surface. So many times she had drawn Sora, Riku and Kairi together. And sure there were strong feelings of both love and jealousy, but had she not had her sketch pad, she might have missed Sora's emotions of gratitude for two stalwart best friends, confusion about school topics they had recently studied, and hope that Kairi would want to go with him to the first school dance, even though he knew they would just go together and bail early to hang out on the play island like they always did whenever the school had some social.

"Here you go. It's nothing special, but it's better than nothing." Riku interrupted her thoughts with a plate of food.

With a gasp, Namine hurried to cover her sketch pad. Even though she knew he couldn't see it, he moved so gracefully that she sometimes wondered if he really was blind. Although those first couple of days made the mansion quite a bit louder with his cries of annoyance as he bumped into furniture. He even fell into the secret compartment that hid the computer lab, but luckily managed to land safely.

"Drawing something you don't want anyone to see?" Riku smirked.

"No!" Namine replied a bit sharper than she thought. "Maybe."

Riku laughed as he set their plates down and pulled a chair over. "I'm only kidding. You don't have to be working on Sora nonstop. If you want to take a moment for yourself, then do it."

"No, I need to be working on Sora. It was my fault he's like this in the first place. I want to keep my promise." Namine picked up the white plastic fork. For once would it hurt to have some color around here?

With a sigh, Riku held his hand out for her to hold. "We've been over this, Nam. What happened wasn't your fault. You were being used." Softly Riku muttered "you still are."

Namine looked at him for a moment and then looked down at her food. She picked at it for a few moments before softly sliding her hand in his and taking a couple of bites. She ate in a comfortable silence, simply feeling the pressure that came from the gentle touch. This sort of thing wasn't unusual for them. They could usually be found in silence with their hands connected. But the mountain of pressure from the recent block in memories and lack of self care was threatening to squish Namine with its enormous weight.

"How's the restoration going?" Riku asked.

Namine's stomach began to twist around itself. "I'm….not sure."

Riku squeezed her hand, urging her to explain. Namine sighed, unsure of how to continue. Would he get mad if she told the truth? He had slowly been becoming more like DiZ, after all. He used to be there with her when she was getting told off. These days, Riku was never usually in the white room for more than five minutes unless it was late at night.

"You remember what Sora's mom used to tell him all the time, right?" Riku recalled.

"Never talk to strangers on the play island?"

Riku chuckled, remembering a secret promise. "A problem shared is a problem halved. If you tell me, it might relieve some of the pressure on you."

There was no avoiding it, not as long as he held her hand.

"It's just that, well-" Namine fumbled for the words. "There's been a bit of a roadblock. I've been doing my best to sort it out, tracing the connections, but it's like the memories slip away as soon as I think I have a grasp on them. I may have gone through half a notebook trying to find a solid piece."

There was a pause, as if Riku were considering what to say.

"I'll go get you a new notebook tomorrow, then. As for the memories, we'll get it figured out. You need to take a break, anyway."

"No!" Namine swallowed back further emotion. Maybe she really did need some sleep. She was being more irrational than she expected. "No, it's fine. I'm sure I'm doing something wrong."

"Don't say stuff like that. If there's anyone who can make this situation right, it's you. Please, just take a few hours to rest tomorrow, okay?" Riku squeezed her hand again.

"I don't really have a choice here, do I?" Namine sighed.

"You always have a choice. I'm just asking you as someone who cares a lot about you."

Someone who cares? Namine thought. She slowly nodded in reply. Maybe a break was exactly what she needed.

"Thank you, Riku."

One Year Later

Again Riku tried to beat Marluxia, and again he was defeated. He only had this last battle to finish, having started against the organization members he recognized or had personally fought against. Which, admittedly wasn't many, but after several attempts, he was down to the last. It frustrated him that he still wasn't quite used to the keyboard controls, and Sora's moves were much less based in strength and relied much more on magic. Riku had never been very good with magic, focusing on perfecting his cure and dark firaga spells instead of learning the large array of magic that his friends had mastered.

Some keyblade master I turned out to be. Riku thought, sitting back in his seat and folding his arms. I can't even stop my two best friends from leaving me again. This is just like back then…

His mind began to drift away with thoughts of Castle Oblivion and Twilight Town. He heard the door open and gentle footsteps move toward him.

"Hey Aerith. We can work on that scarf in a minute. I have to get some more ethers for data Sora first."

"I take it the fight didn't go well then?" A soft voice walked closer.

He closed his eyes and shook his head. Not Aerith.

"Hey Namine. How could you tell?"

Namine placed a hand on his shoulder and gave a gentle squeeze. "You're really tense. Besides, I could feel your frustration from a block away."

What anger and annoyance had once plagued Riku's mind had since washed away. All he could register was how reassuring Namine's hand on his shoulder felt. She smelled nice, too. A faint blush warmed his cheeks. Ever since Kairi had insisted on going to sleep and Terra had left for the dark realm with Aqua and Ven, Namine was the only person Riku shared everything with. She had heard him vent several times, and she had been helping Aerith teach him how to knit. It was her delicate fingers that had lead him through the steps of a cable.

"I guess I need a little bit of a break." Riku said with a sigh. "Wanna go get some ice cream or something?"

"Sure." Namine smiled, stepping back so he could get up and stretch. They began to talk as they walked to their usual ice cream shop.

Since Scrooge, Huey and Dewey had returned home, the ice cream shop had been manned by one of the local citizens. He usually gave Riku a discount, so Riku usually put some munny in the tip jar. It had become routine over the past year to go whenever Namine came to visit from Twilight Town.

"How is everything going with Roxas and Xion?" Riku asked, sitting down and unwrapping his fruit bar.

"Slow." Namine replied, taking a small lick from her chocolate cherry ice cream cone. She wanted to try all of the flavors, and this was the last one. "Not too bad, but I think I preferred the strawberry cheesecake the best."

"That was a flavor Kairi always liked." Riku smiled softly.

When he saw the way Namine looked for just the hair of a second, he realized that was probably the wrong thing to say. He inwardly cursed himself and his inability to be the suave guy all the girls had thought he was growing up. Kairi and Namine didn't get much of a chance to talk after she got her replica body, as Kairi had almost immediately asked to be put under. Riku wondered what it was like living inside a heart of pure light. Just like Castle Oblivion, she didn't talk about it much.

"We should get some for her when she wakes up." Namine continued to eat her cone. There was an uncomfortable silence for just a moment before Namine spoke up again. "Who were you fighting when I came in?"

"Marluxia. He was the head of the castle, right?"

Namine nodded.

"I never really got to meet him as I was down in the basement back then. I'm sorry you had to deal with a guy like him."

"It's alright. I...had some support. There was Sora and Donald and Goofy. And despite everything I did to him, there was your replica, too." Namine spoke slowly, choosing her words with care. "But don't feel bad. He made his decisions, like everyone else."

This time, it was Riku's turn to nod in agreement, taking a bite from his treat.

"After the data battles are all said and done, what happens next?" Namine asked softly.

"I...don't know. All I know is that I've been having these weird dreams lately."

"I wondered. You look tired." Namine grabbed on to Riku's hand, intertwining their fingers.

Maybe it was a reflex, maybe it was a force of habit, like how they used to sit back in the old mansion. Either way, the touch on its own was enough to pull Riku away from the dark thoughts that usually sat at the horizon of his mind. He squeezed her hand in response.

"Don't hesitate to call me if you ever need someone to talk to. I miss our little midnight chats." Namine admitted.

"I do too." Riku smiled softly. "They really helped clear my mind back then."

"A problem shared is a problem halved, remember?" Namine was glad she could actually see his eyes as she recalled back to his words that helped her through her time at the old mansion. "Care to share anything?"

Riku paused. He sighed before starting to speak. After he told her of the recurring dream he'd been having with the buildings and the feeling of being watched, he also admitted to the weight that had been pinned on his shoulders.

"I know it might sound silly, but I can't help but wonder if these dreams are connected to Sora somehow. I just wish I could understand it more." Riku finished his bar and set the popsicle stick on the bench beside him.

Namine had just finished her ice cream as well, wiping her face with the napkin. "Maybe it's time you take another journey."

"With the data battle still to fight and Kairi still asleep? I can't leave now."

"Maybe not now, but after the last battle is won." Namine gently pulled his hand close to her and began massaging it. "But that means I can't follow you. Will you be alright on your own? Maybe you can check Kairi's dreams."

"I...don't know. I haven't used my dream eater powers in a long time and the process is still kind of fuzzy for me." He could feel his muscles relax as she worked at his weary hand.

Doubt was rising in his chest. Maybe she was right. Who was he kidding? He wasn't ready for this kind of thing. He wasn't like Sora or Kairi who could follow their hearts at a moment's notice. He couldn't always feel the way it was trying to lead him.

But as he saw Namine patiently working on his hands, the stiff muscles being brought to relax against her fingers, a light shone through the storm of his doubt. How he hadn't realized it before was a mystery. Ever since they had met, she had been the light in the dark, just as he had provided shade for her in the brightest situations. As she finished the massage, she tenderly squeezed his hands, reassuring him that she was there and willing to help. Surely that was love.

He felt love for her, no question. But with Sora and Kairi gone and asleep, there never seemed to be a good moment to tell her what his heart really wanted to say.

"We...we should be getting back." Namine sighed. "Are you sure you're alright?"

"No, but then, I'm not really all that sure of anything anymore."

"If there's anything I know, it's that things will get better. We'll find Sora. I don't know how or when, but we will." Namine took his hand again, standing before him.

Namine took a quick breath and then leaned over, placing a quick kiss atop his head. Ordinarily, she wouldn't be able to reach, but since he was sitting down, she could offer a small token of her affection and confidence in his abilities.

She and Riku's faces filled with blush, although a smile tugged at her lips. Namine didn't have enough courage to kiss him on the lips like she had wanted to for so long, but this was safe. He couldn't spurn her for a harmless kiss to the head. After all, what was some reassurance between friends?

"Thank you, Namine." Riku had a hard time looking at this angel of a woman without his heartbeat increasing.

To think she was willing to be by his side after all this. He decided there and then that he would listen to his heart and tell her of his feelings...after they set everything right. Once Sora and Kairi were home and together, then they could sort out their own relationship. It would give him yet another reason to bring his best friend home.

He could still feel the kiss on his forehead, and it brought a genuine smile to his face. He stood up and began walking away from Merlin's house.

"Don't feel like you have to stop working on the data battles on my account. I just wanted to make sure you were doing alright." Namine stopped for a second.

"We can get back to those soon enough. I need a little longer before I get back into it." He took his trash and threw it into a nearby can. "There are some fountains that are really pretty this time of day nearby if you want to check them out with me."

A smile formed on Namine's lips. "I'd love to, Riku."

#RikuNami #namiku #mopzine #kh fanfiction #riku #namine #post Re:Mind #Pre MoM

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antihero-writings · 3 years

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IM SO EXCITED TO BE ABLE TO SHARE THIS WITH YOU GUYS

It’s a project that’s been a while in the making....

I MADE PHYSICAL BOOKS OF MY FICS

AHHHHHHHH

Including art from @almaadst (tumblr), Junki Sakuraba (instagram and Deviantart), Stlyrica (instagram), and niuan_ (instagram)!

(I took a video of me flipping through it, but apparently tumblr doesnt let you post videos, so I’ll probably post that on a different platform and put a link to it in a reblog! For now I just included most of the pages with art on them).

I’m so excited!!! The printing service was so nice, and I think they turned out really amazing!!! :D It was a lot of hard work, but I think it was really worth it!!

I feel this requires some explanation!!

I have many grandparents, and they’re super supportive—happy to read my writing, even if it’s FanFiction. A few years ago I compiled a 3-ring binder of all my writings at the time for them for Christmas. They absolutely adored it, so I wanted to do that in the following years too, but for some reason never got around to it.

So this/last year we decided to go all out and not just make a binder, but use an actual printing service to print physical copies of my work! (We also made one of these for my original works, and another 3-ring binder for anything that couldn’t fit in the books).

(I have included the table of contents in the pictures so you know which stories are in the book. (Not all of them would fit)).

They seemed to appreciate them, haha!! And I thought you might too!!!

In addition to that, very quickly after doing this I realized, as long as I got permission from the artists, I could sell something like this to you guys!! Kinda like a zine, but, you know, of my own works!!

So, yeah! If I made a physical version of my fics to sell, would you guys be interested in buying?

I’ve gotten permission from the artists to sell all but two of the pieces in the books, (and I’m not sure about the border art on the cover and back, they were from the internet) so I should be able to make similar books like these in the future!!

I made a survey to see what you guys would be interested in buying! (I put that here ^^, as well as in a separate post, so please please go check it out!!)

Even though I do have 3 copies of these left, I don’t know that it’s a good idea to sell these particular books. So I’m considering remaking a version that’s a bit more sell-able! I was thinking of splitting future books up by fandoms. I think generally people just follow me for one or two fandoms, so it might be nice to sell a booklet of all my Castlevania fics together, a separate one of all my Pandora Hearts fics, and so forth. Would that be good? Then the one-offs could be all be in their own book, maybe? Either that or splitting them based on genre. (ie all the anime fics are in one book, all the cartoon fics are in one book, all the video game fics are in one book, and then all the more mainstream stuff is in one book). Any thoughts?

I really hope you guys like it/think it’s cool too!! It’s so much fun to have actual physical proof of the things I’ve worked on over the past few years!!!

Even if you’re not interested in buying, a reblog of this, and/or the survey post, to spread the word would be super duper helpful!!

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ibelieveinahappilyeverafter · 4 years

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Recovery Zine - The Bonds We Choose (Recovery Leftovers Now On Sale!)

Hello, everyone! I’m so excited to finally share the story I wrote for the @recoveryzine project that was so much fun to work on! Speaking of, the leftovers sale is now up and going and you guys should check it out!

https://recoveryzine.tumblr.com/post/626096800774897665/recovery-leftovers-go-on-sale-august-14th-at-6pm

Support some great causes, enjoy the characters we all love, and remember to take care of yourself!

Aizawa Shouta grunted at the solid kick that slammed into his crossed arms, pushing him back a couple inches across the training mats. The follow up punch was aimed directly at his exposed side a half second later, Shouta dodging the shot before catching the next swing with an open palm, ignoring the light sting and staring into the determined eyes of one Shinsou Hitoshi.

A beat passed where the two stared each other down before Shouta let his lips twitch up into a pleased smile before he relaxed his stance, Shinsou doing the same after making certain the match was truly over. “You’ve been practicing on your speed.”

“Like you said, none of this matters if I’m not fast enough to keep up with a fight before I get a chance to use my quirk,” Shinsou shrugged, trying for modesty even as Shouta saw the glee at his efforts being noticed. The kid soaked up praise like it was the first and last time he would ever hear it. Worrying, but it was a topic for another time since Shouta saw the exact segway he needed.

“Speaking of, we should work on your quirk today. The physical training you’ve been doing will be useless if you don’t learn how to pair it with your quirk by the time you transfer into the heroics course.” The kid had been squirming out of quirk practice since Shouta had first started training him, but Shinsou needed to improve his quirk before he tried to start learning how to use the binding cloth.

“Today as in… right now?” Shinsou’s voice warbled like a student who was asked for homework that had never been done; which was impressive given his expression was blank and tired as it always was. The look stirring in his eyes, though, had Shouta swearing and hoping he was imagining the fear he saw there. “I thought today was a physical training day.”

“It is. Physical training means training every part of your body - including your quirk.” Shouta felt some of his own tension drain away at the disgruntled expression he was given. “Don’t worry, kid, we’ll start simple. Do you know any of the limits of your quirk? How many people you can control, how long it lasts, anything like that? Does it always have to be a verbal answer, or will a nod work?”

There was that hesitation again, like talking about his quirk was the very last thing that Shinsou wanted to do, but eventually, after what felt like too long a silence for simple quirk questions, Shinsou shook his head. “No, I have to be given a verbal answer. I, uh, maybe other languages might make a difference, but sign language doesn’t. My quirk doesn’t activate with sign.”

The way the words were spoken, something familiar in the tone, had Shouta lifting his hands up and signing in quick, fluid motions that would be easy to read. ‘You know sign language?’

His suspicions were confirmed when Shinsou responded in sign, a simple, ‘The basics.’ The motions were a little hesitant, so whatever he had learned had either been recent or he didn’t practice with ‘speaking’ it much.

Shinsou went back to talking, Shouta frowning as the kid rubbed at the back of his neck, the clearest sign there was to show he was nervous. “I, uh, I don’t know how many I can control at once, but I think it’d only be one or two before I started having problems. I don’t really know a time limit, but to break out of it the person just needs a hard jab or something.”

“Alright, we’ll start today by seeing what sort of time limits you can work with when it comes to a single person not fighting back. I want you to use your quirk on me and then hold it for as long as you can. I won’t be fighting back, to begin with, but we’ll cap it at ten minutes and then go from there depending on how you feel.”

It wasn’t the most intensive training when it came to quirks, but Shouta had a wary feeling that Shinsou didn’t practice with his quirk for more than one reason. This exercise would give them both a good idea of what he could do and also warm Shinsou up to using his quirk without any negative repercussions. It didn’t take a genius to see the quirk discrimination Shinsou had been through with a quirk like Brainwashing, after all.

“Right.” There was the barest hitch to the words that could have been passed off as the kid still regaining his breath, but Shouta filed the information away just in case it became a problem for later. “Ten minutes?”

“Ten-” Shouta’s response ended abruptly as it felt like every empty spot in his head became stuffed with cotton while his mind disconnected from his body, the world turned on it’s side as he was unable to even make a sound or form an expression.

He could see Shinsou’s brief smile and felt a pang of amused annoyance as he took notice of how just seeing things felt different. He could certainly understand why the average person would panic when being put under a quirk like Shinsou’s suddenly and without warning, but after a few moments of adjusting, it wasn’t that bad.

There was no mistake the quirk was disconcerting to be under, but the disconnect was more than nice when Shouta also realized that he could hardly, if at all, feel any of the usual pain that plagued his joints and scars. It was a nice reprieve and Shouta figured if the kid decided he didn’t want to be a hero then he had a great career in physical therapy.

Relaxing against the quirk, Shouta kept careful watch on Shinsou as best he could, noticing how the kid started to fidget and twist at his sleeves, looking at the phone he had pulled out every few seconds and obviously checking the time to keep track of the ten minute mark.

At the hesitant call of his name, Shouta’s attention focused back on Shinsou, who was looking more and more nervous as he mumbled a soft, “It’s been a long time since I’ve kept an adult under this long, so I’m not sure how that might affect things. Just so you know.”

The disclaimer was rather unnecessary since that was the point of testing one’s quirk, so they could know how Shinsou’s quirk affected people. That was a good thing to keep in mind, though, if there were any differences in control depending on age. He had a feeling that it might be easier for an adult to break out of the control than a child, but they would have to test that in the future.

“It’s, um, it’s been four minutes, too,” Shinsou said, something in his tone wavering as he looked between the floor and his phone. “I’m sorry, this is probably uncomfortable for you. I know my quirk can sometimes even hurt- Should I end it early? I- You can’t really answer that, I guess, but, uh- Yeah. Just… yeah.”

He knew his quirk could hurt, huh? Shouta could guess at the types of people that had told him that, before, and he made another mental note to reassure the kid that his control was, if anything, helping his pain.

“Aizawa-sensei, I’m- I’m not sure if we should go the full ten minutes.” Something was wrong. “I- It’s not hurting me, but it’s probably hurting you, and I know you’re a pro-hero and everything, but I- I don’t want to hurt you, Sensei.” Fuck, the kid sounded so genuine and as if the very idea of hurting someone terrified him.

Focusing on Shinsou as much as he could, Shouta wanted to curse as he saw that the kid, in just a few short minutes, had become tense and withdrawn. He clutched at his phone with enough force to turn his hands a pale white even as he stared at the ground with his chest stuttering as if he wasn’t able to get a full breath, something in his face both utterly expressionless and completely panicked. “Aizawa-sensei, I… I can’t let go.”

There was a beat of silence, Shinsou’s phone slipping out of his hands and crashing to the floor, Shinsou following a second later and crouching down low with his hands buried in his hair, Shouta a second away from starting to panic himself as Shinsou’s terrified mutters filled the air, a constant stream of, “Sorry, sorry, sorry, I’m sorry, I can’t do it, I don’t remember how to let go, why can’t I let go, I can’t do it-” that didn’t seem to be stopping anytime soon.

A moment passed where Shouta had no idea where to even start to break Shinsou’s control before he felt it snap on his own, everything inside him shifting as the world was returned to its proper place and his mind and body were his own again; which had him stumbling in his steps as he adjusted to the familiar wave of pain that swept through him.

Taking a single second more to reorientate himself and feel nothing except worry for the kid who wanted to so badly be a hero and yet was so terrified of his quirk, Shouta took a breath and walked forward slowly, crouching down in front of Shinsou and not quite touching him, instead asking a soft, “Shinsou? Can you hear me?”

There was no response beyond the terrified mutters and apologies, Shouta making one last mental note to talk to Recovery Girl later for suggestions on how to help Shinsou deal with what he prayed was something that only recently developed.

Weighing a few choices quickly, Shouta finally settled for resting a hand on the back of Shinsou’s neck, the kid’s head half buried between his knees with how low to the ground he was crouched. The words all cut off and faded with a sharp silence at the physical contact, Shouta careful to keep his touch firm, but easy enough to slip away from.

“Shinsou, can you nod if you can hear me?” Terrified, half-glazed eyes darted up to him, a half-nod being given to him. Shouta felt something in him unwind just a small amount, a breath leaving him as he gave a nod himself. “Alright. I’m going to give you a set of instructions and I want you to follow them. Can you do that?” The nod came a bit quicker this time, Shouta grateful that Shinsou hadn’t yet completely lost himself to his panic.

“Good. Take a slow, deep breath in without rushing.” Shouta half-worried for a second that Shinsou would lose himself to his panic again before he saw the teen’s back slowly rise with the deep breath he was taking. “Good- That’s good. Now hold it for me, alright?”

Counting out five seconds in his head, Shouta lightly tapped the back of Shinsou’s neck, careful to not squeeze. “Now let it out slowly and steadily. Don’t rush it.” Waiting for a good seven seconds, Shouta gave Shinsou another tap. “Good job. Now, one more time, okay? Take another slow, deep breath in.”

Shouta ran Shinsou through the breathing exercises a couple more times before the teen seemed to start to come back to himself, Shouta deciding he was okay when all the panic had drained out of him in favor of embarrassment, a quiet, “Sorry.” leaving him.

“Kid- Shinsou,” Shouta waited until Shinsou was no longer looking away from him to continue. “I teach a heroics course at the most rigorous school for heroes in the country and deal with panicked and hurt civilians on a daily basis. This isn’t the first time I’ve dealt with something like this and it won’t be the last.”

That, at least, seemed to help in some way, Shouta sighing as he finally sat down properly, feeling twinges of pain as his body readjusted to the new position. He watched as Shinsou copied him after a long moment, properly sitting on the floor with an expression that could only ever be called guilty.

“‘S not very heroic, though… being afraid of your own quirk.” Ah… so Shouta had been right, then. He wished had hadn’t been. “I mean- I should be over this. I should be over this!” The fight seemed to drain out of Shinsou as quick as it had riled him up, the kid looking the very picture of dejected. “Heroes aren’t supposed to have flaws like this.” Oh. Well, then. That was something, at least, that Shouta could help with.

“Shinsou, would you say that I’m a hero?” It was almost funny how quick the kid’s head snapped up, his eyes wide as he scrambled to answer.

“Of course! You’re one of the most successful underground heroes- You’d be in the top ten easily if you ever went public!” Hm. It was an effort to hide the laugh he wanted to give.

“Even though I suffer from chronic pain and narcolepsy?” Shouta didn’t make a habit of sharing his personal life with his students, but, well. Shouta had already made peace with the fact he was less of a teacher and more of a mentor to the kid.

Shinsou, for his part, was silent and still, eyes wide as he stared at Shouta before finally managing a quiet, “You… what?”

“It’s pretty common knowledge around the teachers and my students, at least, that the use of my quirk causes dry eye,” Shouta hummed, settling down and shifting to relieve some of the pressure on his right hip. “What’s not as well known is that I have a moderate to severe case of narcolepsy depending on the current state of my health and chronic pain in my joints that I’ve had since I was a teenager.”

Shouta wasn’t sure how to describe the look on the kid’s face, but it at least wasn’t anything bad. That was good enough. “So, after knowing all of my ‘flaws,’ do you still think I’m a hero?”

The silence lasted for only half a second more before Shinsou was looking like any other hero fan, “How could you not be a hero?! You’re basically running around and fighting quirkless while you’re always in pain! That’s incredible!”

Nemuri and Hizashi would get a kick out of this kid if Shouta ever made the mistake to let them meet, he mused to himself, but for now he batted the thoughts away and caught Shinsou’s gaze before letting himself show a small smile.

“And so are you.” The look that showed he wanted to argue was there on his face, but Shinsou stayed quiet. That was enough, for now. “Shinsou, you’ve told me enough about yourself that I can guess what you haven’t told me.” A ‘rough childhood’ probably didn’t even cover it, after what Shouta had seen. “You’re recovering, Shinsou, and recovery, no matter what else you’ve heard, is a process. You’re never going to wake up one day and be perfectly healed, and that’s fine.”

Shouta looked down for a moment, gathering his thoughts and pushing himself to be just personal enough to get through the kid’s stubborn head. “There were a lot of times when I was your age that I thought of giving up. I had a quirk that didn’t offer me any physical strength, I had medical problems that were only getting worse, and I was further behind my classmates than anyone else. It would have been easy to give up and go do something that wasn’t so ‘dangerous.’”

“Why didn’t you?” Shinsou’s question was hushed and hesitant, as if afraid he wouldn’t get an answer. Honestly, he should have known by then that Shouta would never refuse to answer a question from him. “If… With all of that, how did you keep going?”

“I almost didn’t, but… I had friends who gave me the inspiration I needed to keep fighting.” There were some memories from that time in his life that hurt so deeply, even then, but others were the only thing to keep him going after some fights. “Those bonds gave me the strength and the inspiration to see that I could keep fighting.

“I wasn’t lying when I said recovery is a process, Shinsou. There aren’t always going to be happy days. There are going to be days where it feels like nothing will ever be good again, but those days end. Recovery is a battle that involves fighting back just as much as it involves resting and gathering your strength.”

Shouta blew out a breath, leaning back for a moment. “Recovery isn’t an end goal to achieve. It’s something you’re constantly working and improving on until you can go beyond all the limits you set for yourself. Understand?”

Shinsou was silent, an expression on his face that showed he was thinking over Shouta’s words carefully. Finally, after what could have been an eternity, Shinsou gave a tired, but real smile. “Plus Ultra, right?”

Shouta couldn’t have stopped his laugh if he tried, standing up and still chuckling as he ruffled the kid’s hair. “Yeah, kid. Plus Ultra.”

There was no doubt, after that, that Shinsou Hitoshi was going to be one of the best heroes Shouta had ever seen.

#shinsou hitoshi #aizawa shouta #eraserhead #shinson #dadzawa #bnha #boku no hero academia #mha #my hero academia #original #my writing #recovery zine #recoveryzine

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vityuuwrites · 3 years

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last bud not least

it’s finally time!! the zine has been sold out, the money donated to ao3 so we got permission by @mlwriterzine to publish our finished piece! thank you to everyone who worked on the zine - the mods, writers and artists - and thank you to everyone who bought our zine, we’re so honoured!! this couldn’t be possible without all of you <333

i hope you guys enjoy this story and don’t forget to check out everyone else’s work, as well!!

When Adrien opens his eyes, he thinks he sees Ladybug there in the silhouette of the inky blue sky and the streetlights blinking back at him like a low-hung moon. He sighs when he blinks a few more times and she’s gone, a whisper in the night that never existed.

Hair falling back against his pillow, he closes his eyes and throws his arm over his face. Plagg’s soft snores tickle his ears. “Another dream,” he murmurs and cracks open an eye. The ceiling stares back down at him. He can’t tear his eyes off the long, shadowy crack he’s mapped during sleepless nights so many times he can draw it by memory. It reminds him of the route Ladybug and he took all those weeks ago, when she graced him with the snake miraculous and his dreams have never been the same ever since. Duck behind the trash can, run a straight line from there to the other side of the square and then zap — she was gone like the promise she had whispered to him, assuring him that she’s never going anywhere.

Adrien groans and squeezes his eyes shut. He can’t stop thinking about that day—about her kind smile as she entrusted the miraculous to him, her eyes shining with trust and promise and sincerity that were all for nothing in the end. That Adrien himself betrayed when he failed to right the wrongs in the end. He’s not a planner, never was. That’s why he works so well as Chat Noir. But not Aspik, never again. Never.

The one time that stayed with him the most—besides the very last one that made him give up completely—was her shy smile when he gave her the rose that flushed like her cheeks, silky smooth and perfect, the warm way she looked at him as she took it and softly thanked him. The way she disappeared just seconds after as if the warmth in her expression was merely a fragment of his imagination.

Adrien rolls over onto his stomach. He wants to make her look at him like that again, but she never does, never in those thousand times he’s tried as Chat Noir.

He wants to try it again, no miraculous and responsibilities burning between them this time, hanging over them like the crescent moon lit on fire. Wants to see her smile at him again, as if she truly sees him. Most importantly, he wants her to know how much she means to him. Wants her to remember it.

He closes his eyes and curls up around his pillow. An idea swirls in his head and restlessly stays there, stroking its claws against his mind and pushing them in, refusing to budge.

He just needs to figure out how to do it without raising suspicion.

His lips curl in a smile as he drifts off again, with Plagg pressed up against his hair and the moon outside returning his smile.

***

“You want to give Ladybug a rose?” Nino says, bewildered as he stares at Adrien, who’s turning all shades of pink at once. “But why, dude?”

Adrien shushes him as he looks around to make sure no one’s heard. He then glances at Nino and slumps in his chair, his history homework forgotten. “It’s a bad idea, isn’t it?”

“No, just … odd.” Nino wrinkles his nose as he turns to give Adrien his full attention. “I didn’t know you knew her.”

“I don’t!” Adrien quickly says and shakes his head wildly. He knows Plagg is sniggering somewhere in his bag while nibbling on the cheese he’s left him after lunch. “Just … I feel like she deserves one, y’know? She’s done so much for us already; it’s the least that she deserves.”

There’s a crash somewhere in the distance, like a fair amount of books falling to the ground, but he pays it no mind. He wrings his hands together. “Plus, she’s just...” he continues and smiles down at his lap. “She’s just so amazing, you know? I feel like she deserves to know that.”

When Adrien looks up, Nino is looking at him with an expression Adrien can’t read—eyebrows raised and eyes wide, lips parted as he refuses to blink for even a second.

Adrien squirms and looks back down at his lap. “Yeah, I knew it was stupid.”

Nino blinks and shakes his head. “Dude, are you in love with Ladybug?” he blurts out, voice carrying over the quiet space. He shifts his chair closer.

Adrien feels his face warm and he quickly shakes his head as he looks up at Nino, who’s still giving him the same look.

“Of course not,” he denies, his voice shaking as his heart speeds up. He curses them both. “How can I be in love with her? I don’t even know her!”

There’s another, louder sound somewhere behind him, but it barely registers over the sound of his heart pounding loudly in his ears. He glances over his shoulder for just long enough to see a flash of black and pink before it’s gone and he’s not completely sure that wasn’t a fragment of his own imagination.

Nino is shaking his head when he looks back. “Dude, you so are, don’t deny it,” he says and barks out a laugh. “Shit, how did I never see this before?”

Adrien just flushes a deeper hue of red before slumping his shoulders. “Please don’t tell anyone,” he murmurs as something heavy rolls off his chest. Maybe this isn’t the smartest idea but—but it feels amazing to say it out loud. Adrien could weep.

Nino shakes his head again. “Your secret’s safe with me, promise,” he tells him and mimics locking his lips.

Adrien weakly smiles back.

“Okay, back to the rose you want to give her—” “

They never end up doing their history homework, but it’s the lightest Adrien has ever felt upon returning home regardless.

***

Adrien has kept a single red rose in his backpack ever since he’s decided to give it to her. Unfortunately, he hasn’t had a chance encounter with her in that time—or even any encounter for that matter. With the spring air tickling his cheeks until they turn pink, it’s been surprisingly peaceful, no akumas for them to fight.

And he’s happy about it; he really is—but the rose in his backpack is wilting in a flurry of dark tears that weigh down on his backpack as if it’s the single most heavy thing he’s ever owned.

It doesn’t help that Nino elbows him every day he comes to class and makes Adrien sink further in his chair while holding back a smile.

I have the best friend in the whole world, he thinks one day as he elbows him back. They sink into a discussion about their latest homework as if they don’t share a secret between them. And then he feels Marinette’s stare, his head turning to give her a smile and a wave.

Marinette turns beet red then, shyly waving and smiling back before turning back to Alya. Occasionally he still feels her eyes on him, but he’s so used to it from everyone he tunes it out.

And then, on that very same day, Ladybug lands in front of him when he’s leaving school.

Adrien stumbles back when he sees her. She’s pink-cheeked and beautiful with the pinking sky as her backdrop. His heart stutters in his chest. She’s wringing her hands together until one of them reaches up to tug on her pigtail and she meets his eyes with a confident gaze of her own. Adrien just continues staring.

“Ladybug?” he says, voice shaking. “What are you doing here?”

Ladybug ducks her head. “I’m on patrol,” she says.

Adrien knows it’s a lie—she and Chat Noir patrol together every Tuesday and Friday—but he also knows he can’t call her out on it, so he stays quiet.

“And I saw you so I wanted to come say hi.” She pauses. “Hi.”

Adrien grips at the straps of his backpack. His driver is watching them, wary and impatient, and he knows he doesn’t have much time. His cheeks burn as he coughs into his hand.

“Hi,” he says and smiles at her. “It’s nice to see you. I, uhh …” He pauses, feeling his cheeks burn hotter as he shrugs off his backpack while Ladybug watches with interest, taking a few steps closer to him. He opens it and starts looking through it, feeling slightly sick, his hands shaking with nerves. When his fingers wrap around a smooth stem, he hesitates for a second then pulls it out to offer it to her.

Her eyes are impossibly blue and wide as she looks at him. It makes the whole week of agonizing worth it.

Adrien smiles at her, but it’s shaky and slight. “I just—I wanted to thank you for how hard you work and express my gratitude somehow, even if it’s something as small as this.” He hesitates when she doesn’t reach out to take it. “If this is weird or inappropriate I’m so—”

Ladybug quickly shakes her head and takes it from him—their fingers brush, even if it’s through the material of her suit, and her hand leaves tingles where it touches his. He licks his lips and feels his chest go light with relief.

“I love it,” she says and holds it close to her. “I—thank you. It’s beautiful.”

Adrien gives a shaky sigh as he smiles down at her hands. “I’ve wanted to give it to you for a while now,” he admits and gestures at the petals which have begun to wilt. “But I never saw you, so sorry it’s a bit wilted.”

Ladybug quickly shakes her head. “It’s perfect,” she assures him and steps closer to him. Adrien gulps when she stands right in front of him, smiling up at him with rosy cheeks and soft eyes.

Then his heart stutters when her lips press an even softer kiss against the warm skin of his cheeks. “Thank you,” she whispers in his ear and pulls away to smile at him. Then, as suddenly as she’s appeared, she’s gone.

Adrien stands there, still as a statue until his driver coughs loudly and brings him back to reality.

***

Ladybug’s next visit is unexpected—on a moonlit Wednesday night. Just the day before, he’s seen her cheerful smile and spring in her step on patrol, when she teased him more than usual and seemed to glow so much brighter, if that’s even possible. He didn’t expect to see her as a civilian again, at least not until she’s saving him and there is fire and adrenaline pumping through him like a drug as he’s attempting to get away and come help her.

Alas, Ladybug is full of surprises.

Adrien is humming to himself as he towels his hair, walking across the room in his Ladybug pajamas to join the snoring Plagg, who’s curled up soundly on his pillow. His chest warms as he watches Plagg grumble to himself. Fingers reaching out, he almost brushes his fingertips against his ears.

His heart lurches out of his chest when he hears the knock against his window .

It’s a soft sound, whispering through the night, but in the eerie stillness of his room, he hears it. It echoes through the wide space like a yell, and he quickly turns around, throwing the wet towel over Plagg to hide him. Ladybug’s silhouette sketches itself out outside his window with the slumbering street as her backdrop, streetlights playing in her hair and, a bit dazed, he notices the jittery way she’s holding herself.

Adrien tries in vain to tame his hair, tucking a dripping wet lock behind his ear before he stumbles over to open the window for her.

The cold air assaults him when she’s finally in arm’s reach. It makes him shiver.

“Ladybug?” he says, eyes wide as he hugs his arm close to himself. “What are you”—a gulp — “what are you doing here?”

Ladybug is hiding her hands behind her back, a shadow of a smile on her face. “Sorry, I know it’s late.” She presses her lips together. “May I come in?”

Adrien quickly nods and takes a few steps back to let her come in, closing the window behind her with a soft sound. He tries to smooth down his hair, tugging his pajamas close to himself almost self-consciously. He never thought she’d ever see him in them.

Ladybug turns to him, her hands still hiding behind her back. She looks him up and down, and even though he’s a model and he’s used to people scrutinizing him, he wants to curl in on himself as if he never wants to be seen. A wide smirk sketches over her face when their eyes meet again. But, if he squints in the pale yellow light of his room, he thinks he sees her cheeks turn slightly pinker.

“Nice pajamas,” she teases and raises her eyebrows.

Adrien makes a weak, dying sound.

“Thanks,” he mumbles and tugs on the hem of his shirt. “Nino bought them for me as a joke gift. I have a Chat Noir pair around here somewhere, too.”

“Why don’t you sleep in that one?” she asks, but the corners of her mouth are lifting as if she’s trying not to laugh. It makes his shoulders sag in relief, his own lips starting to do the same.

“Black and green makes me look too dashing.” He pauses and grows flustered again, rubbing the back of his neck. “Not that I’m self-absorbed, I just —! ”

Ladybug smothers a giggle in her hand, shaking her head in amusement, and Adrien could weep. For a second he was worried that he had come across as narcissistic and ruined whatever this was. Whatever she was there for.

Whatever reason she has for coming to visit him, Adrien has no way of seeing it, and it itches at the back of his mind. It burns down to his fingertips, making him want to reach out and touch her, ask her what’s on her mind, but his lips can barely move enough to form a weak sound.

“I know you’re not,” she assures and smiles at him, letting her hand drop to her side. Oddly enough, her other hand stays hidden behind her back, and Adrien eyes it, eyebrows drawn. “I like that about you.”

His heart stutters but he tries not to get it to his head. Not to let his hopes up. Instead he just smiles at her, rubbing the back of his neck again.

“Thank you,” he says. “Not that I mind but … what are you doing here?” he asks after a moment’s pause.

Her eyes widen and this time, he’s sure he sees her cheeks flush warm. She offers him a sheepish smile and—and pulls out a rose from behind her back.

A perfect, beautiful, stunning red rose with full petals. Thornless, the stem is cut at a perfect angle and flushed red where it meets the petals.

His heart balloons in his chest, his heartbeat echoing in his ears, and he can’t take his eyes off her even though he can feel his face getting redder by the second. Ladybug plays with one of her pigtails and all he can do is make a soft, choked sound for the second time that night.

“I—” She coughs and averts her eyes. Her fingers are slightly shaking. “I wanted to return the favour. I really liked your rose. And, ummm. It was a sweet gesture. Which I wanted to return. Because it was sweet.”

“Sweet,” he says, voice shaking. He looks down at the rose—so perfect and soft—and then back at her, at her big eyes that stormed, at the freckles standing out under the soft flush of her cheeks. He slowly takes her rose with shaking fingers, giving her hand a squeeze before he plucks it out of her grasp. She gasps and pulls back her hand as if burned.

Adrien smiles softly down at the rose he’s clutching yet holding so tenderly in his grasp. “Thank you, you really didn’t have to.”

“I wanted to,” Ladybug answers and suddenly stands straighter. “I really wanted to.”

Adrien looks at her —really looks at her—and understands what she can’t say.

I love you. Thank you.

He hugs the rose close to himself and lets himself soak in her moonlit gaze for a while longer.

“It’s getting late,” she says softly when the silence that hangs between them dips too heavy, her fingers playing together. Her lips curl in a petal-light smile.

Adrien wants to reach out and touch her. Wants to ask her to stay.

But the cold, dark streets of Paris call for her and he can’t selfishly demand like so. So he only nods and thumbs at the smooth stem in his hand, trying not to collapse in her arms as she raises her yo-yo.

“Good night,” he says, as soft as her, as the smile she shoots him before she disappears into the dead of the night like a whisper of a fantasy that was never there.

Adrien puts the rose in a glass vase and can’t fall asleep for the rest of the night.

#ml writer zine #ladrien fanfiction #ladrien #miraculous ladybug #marichat #adrienette #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste #Nino lahiffe #ladynoir #fanfiction #ml fanfiction #lyre plays

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transannabeth · 4 years

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hi! you’ve modded zines (and/or big bangs?) before, right? i have an idea similar to a multi-animator project, and was wondering if you had any tips/advice when putting something like that together and managing all those people, esp over the internet. thanks, hope you’re doing well!

i’ve modded zines, secret santas, and fandom weeks!!! and i’d be happy to give some advice! a lot of this is stuff i’ve learned from zines, but i think could be applicable to this too! the advice may vary depending on the size of your project (are you organizing 5 people or 45, you know?) but hopefully there’s something useful here!

from the jump, have your socials ready!

(note: by ‘from the jump’ i mean after the interest check, but having everything prepped before if you KNOW you’re going through with it won’t hurt! please just change it from the default theme no one likes that)

tumblr and twitter should be your mains, but instagram might not hurt. the more cohesive you can make your handles, the better (same with your email) because people will recognize you cross platform, and also it looks professional. i also recommend having the same icon everywhere for recognizability!

in line with that, for at least tumblr, find a decent theme. if you’re not sure what kind to use, click through some zine blogs! see what info they have and how their pages are set up. prominently featured are usually a schedule and faq— make sure your asks and dms are open on all sites and there are clear areas for contacting you!

(linking your personal accounts is also important because people like to see your own work and if you’ve done projects like this before— which i’ll get to)

trust me, the more professional, clean, and put together, the more seriously people will take you. your job is managing this, so your socials should reflect that!

you don’t have to have a hard schedule off the bat, especially in a multi-animator projects, many of which i’ve seen go very off schedule, but having a tentative schedule is important because then people know if they can make time for it or not

mods!!!!! if you can find other mods oh my god THAT!! friends are good if you want at least one person you know, but opening mod apps is great because you can find people with experience in areas you might not have. ESPECIALLY if this is your first time running a project like this i’d recommend at least one mod with some experience, because it’s always nice to have others to help you out and people like knowing someone on the team has experience! mods are such an important support team for the head admin and can really change how a project is handled

for both mod apps and regular apps check out event boosting blogs! one off the top of my head is @faneventshub, but if your project is fandom specific, you might have a fandom event blog as well that tracks stuff like this!

use discord for the project!! discord is literally a godsend for this sort of thing! it puts all (or most) of your contributors in one place and gives you immediate contact to them if needed. how you set up your server is up to you, but typically i have channels for general stuff, rules, schedule, introduction, questions, sharing stuff, and art/content creation. i also create a whole mod section that’s locked, with different channels depending on the project. plus you can pin stuff which is fantastic

Keep Everything In One Place— everything should go to the project’s google drive. all check-ins, all final files, all process stuff, all spreadsheets. that way you’re never hunting for things in other places

and finally managing everyone

spreadsheets are your friends!!! you don’t need to know any fancy excel stuff, just list everyone’s name and make columns for their discord id, all the check-ins, and if they’ve submitted their final file (or however you’d like to do it). i like color coding things but really it’s just whatever is the easiest way for YOU to quickly see at a glance where everyone is at the moment

make sure your timeline is clear, but slightly flexible, and at least early on, give people extensions if asked for. things happen! especially right now, where everything can be super up in the air

remind people a few days before check-ins, dm those who aren’t responding or checking-in, and as daunting as it is, don’t be too afraid to @everyone

having multiple mods is also super helpful here, because you can tackle dm-ing different people and contacting people and everything, without it all being on you

and also? know you’ll probably get ghosted. you’re probably going to have some drops. some that might be super super late in the game. things will probably get off schedule and there are going to be some frustrating times. but you can do this!!!!

good luck!!! i hope something in here was useful!! and i definitely want to see this project when you’re done

#THIS TURNED OUT SO LONG #answered #zine talk #(sort of)#not pjo #Anonymous #Thanks from the Argo!#zine anon

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kinomiakai · 4 years

Text

Fic Decade in Review!

I thought I’d do something a little different this year - so, instead of going over all the fics I’ve written this year, let’s talk about this decade! They’re all SNS (except for the original stuff I’ll throw in there for the sake of accuracy) and will be under the cut :)

If you want to check out the actual summaries and stuff, this is my fanfiction.net account, here is my ao3, and here’s all my original work!

2010:

August: Konoha’s Number One (a dramatic dark!naruto thing that I only keep up to show that I’ve grown as a writer oh my god please don’t read it I’m just putting it here for the sake of honesty ajkhdksa)

2011:

...whoops

2012:

August: Alcohol Induced (my first ever attempt at smut)

September: Perceptual Organization (my attempt to both study and write fic)

October: Worthless (my only ever attempt at first person)

2013:

...uh

2014:

nope

2015:

we’re getting there

2016: (we take off!!)

October: How To Break a Mask is finished after 10 years (whoops), and I get an ao3 account!!! (HtBaM, Alcohol Induced, Perceptual Organization & Worthless are moved there - in the interest of time I’m only going to put ao3 links from now on but everything is also on ff.net!)

Still October: Both Name? and Strictly Professional are posted!

November: Home and The Jutsu are posted! (what the heck I wrote so fast back then???

2016 + prior word count total: 88,285!

2017:

January: I post Sleepless and Miscommunication and Masquerade! Woooo!

September: Posted both The Bet and Can’t Stand You! Can y’all tell I was trying to get better at smut lmao

October: Speaking of smut, Stress Relief was posted this month :D

December: I pause writing Enter Naruto to write Rebuilding in like a week like some sort of fever dream, and somehow have it ready for sns month! (I think this was a big turning point ksjdhkshf)

2017 Word count total: 60,784!

2018:

January: I post the first chapter of The Birthday Chronicles! (which was originally supposed to be a oneshot, oops)

February: I immediately follow it up with the prequel, The Present

April: I post Long Enough! which is definitely long enough to not be a oneshot but is the first fic I genuinely couldn’t bring myself to break into chapters

May: I update The Birthday Chronicles with another chapter that kinda sorta maybe stands alone?

June: I post Unnoticed!! Nice to be back in canon :)

July: I post Some Nights are a Storm! The first time I’ve wildly rewritten a fic. You guys are nice enough to want to read the first draft, too :)

July (again) to August: I start posting Enter Naruto on Sasuke’s birthday! I post a chapter a day and you guys read along and it’s amazing. It’s a culmination of at least two years work and every bit was worth it, I have such fond memories of that :) (A whole bunch of firsts here - writing Sasuke’s parents, writing Kakairu, writing slowburn, writing this MUCH, writing that many smut scenes, writing consistently over a long period of time)

September: I try my hand at one of my favourite tropes in (6+1) Times :) Also the first time I’ve ever written them as kids!

October: I post the third bit of The Birthday Chronicles!

November: I write Online for one tumblr prompt and A Night of Poor Choices for another!

December: I give a christmas gift to all my readers in the form of ‘Tis the Season (and I made a hard deadline!! Woohoo!)

2018 word count total: 203,850!!!! (lmao thanks Enter Naruto)

2019:

January: uhhhhh Under Pressure just kind of happens

February: I write C’mon in a burst of speed in the hopes of cheering up a very sweet anon!

March: we’re back in canon again for a flame, a cave and a feeling!

April: I fiiinnnaaalllly get around to write that Proposal x Wedding prompt and I take lots of liberties with tradition in Reborn by Flame!

June: I finally start posting Something Good! And you guys are all so sweet, even when I make you cry. (Definitely a sadder fic then I generally post, but I’m so glad you came along with me for the ride!) - /// - I also make a patreon and start posting my original work for the first time ever - starting with Some Sort of Feeling!

July: we celebrate Sasuke’s birthday to his unending annoyance in Sasuke’s “Not a Birthday Party” Birthday Party! - /// - (July’s patreon fic is The Worst Date Ever!!)

August: I give you guys a teaser & give a lovely anon a oneshot they requested in the form of Bite Me! (it’s gotten so long now friends. there’s so much happening please help) - /// - I also finally post a wlw fic on my patron as 🍀 (the girl from the bus stop)

September: I post Waiting for an Answer, based off an idea I had yeaaarrrsss ago! - /// - (Similarly, on patreon, I post The Woodcutter and The Witch, set in the world I’ve been thinking about for absolute ages!!)

October: I spend a whole bunch of way too late hours in a haze writing A Hostage Situation until somehow a fic just kind of morphs out of it

November: I finally get to share Moments, the piece I did for @eclipsed-zine! I also post Undeniable, linking all my fics together :) - /// - On patreon I make up for last month by posting chapter 1 & chapter 2 of my long-term project: The Forest!

December: I forgo the christmas present in favour of making your yuletide gay with The Best Best Man! I get to finally write some proper inosaku in :D - /// - I post chapter 3 of the Forest on patreon, and my patreons vote for their christmas gift to be chapter 4 :D <3

2019 word count total: 137,965 of fanfic & 40,100 words of original content!

Stats of the decade: 39 fics - 539,984 words!

I’ll try to beat it in the next ten years :) Thanks for being part of my life, guys! It’s really been awesome to be able to invest myself into writing like this. I hope I can bring you all even more happiness in the next few years!

#kinomi talks #fic year in review #fic decade in review #fics #sns #I normally post summaries and stuff #but I thought it'd be fun to make this a little more reflective #you guys like it!!!#ep3otp #mywriting #writing stuff #long post #text post

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freedom-shamrock · 5 years

Text

Chat Noir’s Four-Point Landing

We’ve gotten permission to share our pieces from @kittylovezine! I got to work with the skilled artist @masilvi (check out their art for the story here), and @clueless-lost-daydreamer was my fantastic beta reader.

There’s a limited supply of leftover products from this project available for purrchase, including a digital or paperback copy of the zine, charms, stickers, prints, and pins.

Also on AO3

⁂

"So let me get this straight," Marinette said, tapping her index finger against her chin. "You're in your last four months of lycee, and you want to move out on your own after graduation. But no one in your life is willing to teach you basic adulting skills." She arched her eyebrows.

Chat Noir nodded. He was a curious mix of eager and nervous.

It bothered her that his family wasn't preparing him. "So you want me to help you with those things?" she asked. "Why me? Don't you have friends outside the suit who could help you?" He visibly deflated at her question so she threw in a qualifier. "I'm happy to help you, Chat, I'm just curious."

"I'm not as free when I'm my other self." He spoke softly, and everything about him seemed hunched up and sad, like he was trying to curl in on himself.

"I'm surprised you'd want my help." She sometimes felt inadequate and underprepared for life on her own. "You've seen I can be a bit of a disaster." Their friendship, sparked the night of the Glaciator akuma, had grown strong over the years.

He beamed at her, radiating joy better than anyone she knew, including Adrien. It was seriously unfair. "Oh Marinette," he said, leaning toward her. "You're amazing. You know how to do so many useful things. You've shared food you've made, and I can't even boil water. I've visited you on laundry day, and I'm terrified I'm going to destroy all my clothes. You're so level-headed; I'm sure you can figure out anything you don't already know. I got overwhelmed by the differing opinions on how to clean the bathroom when I Googled it."

"You poor kitten," she said, careful not to tease too hard. "Of course I'll help. But we may have to call in the big guns if things are beyond me. Okay?"

"Big guns?" he asked, green eyes wide.

"Maman and Papa," she explained.

"Deal."

⁂

The smell of scorched flour filled the kitchen, and Marinette turned from the refrigerator to see Chat hastily yanking a pot off the stove, scowling as he dumped in some water and slammed the lid over the top. He was quieter than normal, and that was usually a bad sign. He braced both hands on the counter near the window and hung his head.

"Chat, are you okay?" It had been his fourth attempt at making a roux, and while he'd gotten farther along, the end result was consistent with his other tries.

"I'm never going to get this," he said softly, as if that would hide the despair. "What am I thinking? I'm never going to survive on my own. I'll have to crawl back to my father a failure."

"Roux is hardly a required staple." She wished she'd picked a different recipe for today. He'd done well learning to read recipes and measure ingredients. His knife skills were impressive. He still had a lot of techniques to learn, and his self-esteem was terrifyingly awful.

"Name one decent cook who can't make roux," he suggested bitterly.

"Maman can't make roux to save her life," Marinette pointed out.

He looked over his shoulder at her, surprised.

Marinette shrugged. "Papa or I make it if she needs it. It's okay."

He looked out the window, then pushed himself away from the counter. "I'm… not used to being so bad at things, and… I'm usually better... faster at picking up new things."

"You've done very well," she insisted.

His cheeks went pink and he looked adorably pleased, but sadness lingered in his eyes.

She held out her arms and approached slowly, though she'd never known him to decline affection. He helped close the distance, and was swiftly snuggled against her, his face nestled into her loose shoulder length hair. "You're doing amazingly well. I'm so proud of you." She felt his breath catch, and it hurt that such simple words, things he should hear regularly, had such an impact on him.

⁂

"All right," Chat said, slipping a piece of paper onto Marinette's desk. "Here's my grocery list for the week."

"You're getting good at this," she said, looking it over. He'd jotted down three recipes he would theoretically make for dinner with leftovers for lunches and other nights. Camembert was right at the very top of the list, as always. "I'm getting you cheese as a housewarming gift."

He snickered. "My uh… miraculous would appreciate that."

She loved hearing him laugh. She'd realized Chat Noir wasn't happy nearly often enough, at least not in his regular life. She pushed her chair back and gestured for him to take over the computer. "Let's see how you do with your shopping."

He navigated to the bookmarks they'd been using for these exercises. He started with the meat department of the grocery store, carefully looking at various cuts of meat and the prices before making his decisions.

"Why is this one so much less expensive?" he asked, pointing.

"Higher ratio of gristle and cartilage," Marinette answered, giggling at the face he made. She would have liked to physically take him shopping so he could get a better understanding of the characteristics and qualities of meat and produce, things that were hard to get from pictures. "Not a fan of extra chewy or crunchy bits in your meat?"

He shook his head.

"That's okay. Maman likes tendon, and I do not." She made a face.

"You're cute when you do that," he said, reaching out to lightly boop her nose.

"Am not."

"Honestly, you're always cute, whether you're making faces or not." He grinned, and turned back to the computer. He added his decisions to the list, with quantity and cost. Before too long, he hopped to his feet. "Whoop!" He handed her the list and danced over to her chaise. "I'm within budget. I win."

She checked his work, joy bubbling up in her chest at his success. "You do win," she agreed.

"It's getting easier, like you said it would."

She joined him on the chaise giddy and warm, something he seemed to trigger in her a lot these days. "We all need to learn this somewhere, and I'm glad you picked me to help."

"So am I. He patted his lap.

Arching an eyebrow, she asked, "You want me to sit on your lap, you naughty cat?"

He nearly fell off the chaise in surprise. "Nooooo. I want to play with your hair." He gave a little shrug. "It was relaxing last time."

"Yeah," she agreed. "It was." She rested her head on his thigh, sighing happily at the touch of his fingers.

⁂

"Oh wow," Marinette said, looking at the photos accompanying the apartment listing. "It's gorgeous. But it's definitely on the upper end of your budget."

Chat nodded. "I think it's what people expect for my first apartment." His arm had slipped around her when she sat beside him, and his fingertips tightened now in an obvious tell. He didn't want the beautiful flat.

"It doesn't matter what others expect, Chat." She gave him a little side hug. "It's your apartment. What do you want?"

He tapped open one of the other tabs, his smile wistful. "I like this one a lot."

It was much smaller with fewer embellishments, but looked nice. "What do you like about it?"

"I think it would be cozy, which is something I don't have… where I live now." He scrolled through the pictures. "No balcony. But the large window off the bedroom faces the back alley. It'll be perfect for slipping in and out as Chat Noir." He opened a tab to a Google Map of Paris and pointed to one of the pins. "Neighborhood is decent, neither snob city nor thug paradise."

She giggled. "You should go see it. Oh!" She slipped out of his hold to fetch a small notebook from the other side of the room. "Papa got this for you." When she sat back down, she wrapped his arm back around her.

He hummed happily and pressed his face into her hair, bumping his nose against the closer of the twin buns she wore.

She set the notebook on the desk so she could properly hug him. "You're getting distracted," she told his chest.

A laugh mixed with a purr rumbled out of him. "You're not exactly discouraging that." He kissed her forehead and opened the notebook to the first page, finding a list of questions followed by a list of warning signs.

"It's to help you get the information you really need, since none of us can come with you." She'd learned a lot when her papa was working on it.

"Most of my friends are moving away for uni," he said softly. "If I make my place safe for you to visit, would you come?"

It was a terrible idea for maintaining identities, but she didn't care. "I'd love to."

#Miraculous Ladybug #fanfic #kittylovezine #kitty love zine #fandom project #Marichat #Marinette #Chat Noir #Masilvi #clueless-lost-daydreamer

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