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pumpkinpaix · 3 years

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Pleeeeeeease get into the class one at some point because I very much want to understand the class dynamics happening in the story but I have yet to find a meta that dives into it

god anon you want me dead don’t you alsjdfljks

referring to this post

okay, so -- my specific salt about class interpretations in mdzs are very targeted. I can’t pretend to have a deep understanding of how class works in mdzs generally because uhhhhh yeah i don’t think i have that. i’m just not familiar enough with the genre and/or the particulars of chinese class systems. but! i can talk in general terms as to why I feel a certain way about the class dynamics that I do think I understand and how I think they relate to the themes of the novel! i’m gonna talk about wei wuxian, the daozhangs, xue yang, and 3zun with, I’m sure, a bunch of digressions along the way.

the usual disclaimers: i do not think you are a bad person if you hold opinions contrary to my own. i may disagree with you very strongly, but like. this isn’t a moral judgment, fandom is transformative and interpretive etc. etc. and i may change my mind. who knows what the future will bring!

OKAY so let’s begin!

here’s the thing about wei wuxian: he’s not poor. I think because characters use “son of a servant” kind of often when they’re trying to insult him, a lot of people latch onto that and think that it’s a much stronger indication of his societal status than it actually is. iirc, most of the insults that fall along the “son of a servant” line come after wei wuxian starts breaking severely from tradition. it’s a convenient thing to attack him for, but doesn’t actually indicate anything about his wealth. (exception: yu ziyuan, but that’s a personal familial issue) this is in direct contrast to jin guangyao who is constantly mocked for his family line, publicly and privately, no matter what he does.

so this, coupled with all the jokes about wwx never having any money (wei wuqian, sizhui’s “i’ve long since known you had no money” etc.), plus his like, rough years on the street as a child ends up producing this interpretation of wei wuxian, especially in modern aus, as someone who is very class conscious and “eat the rich”. but the fact of the matter is, wei wuxian IS rich. aside from the years in his childhood and the last two years of his life in yiling, like -- wei wuxian had money and status. he is gentry. he is respected as gentry. he is treated as a son by the sect leader of yunmeng jiang -- he does not have the jiang name, but it is so very clear that jiang fengmian favors him. wei wuxian is ranked fourth of all the eligible young masters in the cultivation world -- that is not a ranking he could have attained without being accepted into the upper class.

wei wuxian’s poverty does not affect him in the way that it affects jin guangyao or xue yang. he is of low-ish birth (still the son of jiang fengmian’s right hand man though! ok sure, “son of a servant” but like. >_> whatever anyways), but for most of his life he had money. he, jiang cheng, and their sect brothers go into town and steal lotus pods with the understanding that “jiang-shushu will pay for it”. this is a regular thing! that’s fucking rich kid behavior!!! wei wuxian is careless with money because he doesn’t have to worry about it. he still has almost all the benefits of being upper class: education, food security, respect, recognition etc. I think there may also be a misconception that wei wuxian was always on the verge of being kicked out by yu ziyuan, or that he was constantly walking on eggshells around her for fear of being disowned, but that is just textually untrue. i could provide receipts, but I admittedly don’t really feel like digging them up just now ;;

even in his last years in yiling, he was not the one who was dealing with the acute knowledge of poverty: wen qing is the one managing the money, and as far as we know, wei wuxian did little to no management of daily life during the burial mounds days -- mostly, he’s described as hiding in his cave for days on end, working on his inventions, running around like a force of chaos, frivolously making a mess of things -- it’s very very cute that he buries a’yuan in the dirt, but in classic wei wuxian fashion, he did Not think about the practical consequences of it -- that A’Yuan has no other clean clothes, and now he’s gotten this set dirty and has no intention of washing them. is this a personality thing? yeah, but I think it’s also indicative of his lack of concern over the logistics of everyday survival, re: wealth.

furthermore, i think it is important to remember that wei wuxian, when he is protecting the wen remnants, is not protecting common folk: he is still protecting gentry. fallen gentry, yes! but gentry nonetheless. wen qing was favored by wen ruohan, and wen ning himself says that he has a retinue of people under his command (the remnants, essentially). their branch of the family do not have the experience of living and growing in poverty -- they are impoverished and persecuted in their last years, but that’s a very different thing from being impoverished your whole life. (sidenote: I do not believe wei wuxian’s primary motivation for defending the wen remnants was justice -- i believe he did it because he felt he owed wen ning and wen qing a life debt, and once he was there, he wasn’t going to stand around and let the work camps go on. yes, he is concerned about justice and doing the right thing, but that’s not why he went in the first place. anyways, that’s another meta)

after wei wuxian returns, he then marries back into gentry, and very wealthy gentry at that. lwj provides him all the money he could ever want, he is never worried about going homeless, starving, being denied opportunities based on his class and accompanying disadvantages. who would dare? and neither wei wuxian nor lan wangji seem to have much interest in shaking up the order of things, except in little things like the way they teach the juniors. they live in gusu, under the auspices of the lan, and they live a happy, domestic life.

were his years on the street traumatizing? yes, of course they were, there’s so much delicious character exploration to be done re: wei wuxian’s relationship to food, his relationship to his own needs, and his relationship to the people he loves. it’s all important and good! but I feel very strongly that that experience, while it was formative for him, did not impart any true understanding of poverty and the common person’s everyday struggles, nor do I think he ever really gains that understanding. he is observant and canny and aware of class and blood, certainly, but not in a way that makes it his primary hill to die on (badum-tss).

this is in very stark contrast to characters like jin guangyao and xue yang, and to some extent, xiao xingchen and song lan. I’ll start with the daozhangs, because I think they’re the simplest (??).

I think both xiao xingchen and song lan have class consciousness, but in a very simplified, broad-strokes kind of way (at least, given the information we know about them). we know that the two of them share similar values and want to one day form their own sect that gives no weight to the nobility of your lineage and has no concern with your wealth. we also know that they both disdain intersect politics and are more concerned with ideals and principles rather than status. but, I think because of that, this actually somewhat limits their perception and understanding of how status is used to oppress. as far as we know, neither of them participated on any side in sunshot and they demonstrate much more interest in relating to the commoners. honestly, i hc that they were flitting around trying to help decimated towns, protecting defenseless villages etc. I ALSO think this has a lot of interesting potential in terms of xiao xingchen and wei wuxian’s relationship, if xiao xingchen is ever revived. regardless of whether you’re in CQL or novel verse, xiao xingchen really doesn’t know wei wuxian at all, other than knowing that he’s his shijie’s son. he knows that cangse-sanren met with a tragic end, like yanling-daoren before her, and that he wants to be different. but here is cangse-sanren’s son, laying waste to entire cities, desecrating the dead. I would very much like to get into xiao xingchen’s head during that period of time (and i think, if i do it right, i can write some of it into the songxiao fixit), but that’s neither here nor there, because i’ve wandered off from my point again.

i would posit that song lan is used to an ascetic lifestyle, and xiao xingchen probably is too -- but that’s different from poverty because there’s an element of choice to it. I also think that neither of them is particularly worldly, xiao xingchen especially. he lived on an isolated mountain until he was like, seventeen, and he came down full of ideals and naivete about how the world worked. I think that both of them see inequality, that they are angered by it, and that they want to do something about it -- but their solution is neither to topple the sects, nor is it to reform the system. rather, it seems to be more about withdrawing and creating their own removed world. I think that the daozhangs embody a kind of utopianism that isn’t present in the minds of any of the other characters, not even wangxian. honestly, baoshan-sanren’s mountain is a utopian ideal, but one that is not described. it exists outside of and beyond the world. i have a lot of jumbled, vague thoughts about utopianism generally, mostly informed by china miéville and ursula k. le guin, and I don’t think i have the ability to articulate them here, but i wanted to. hm. say something? there is something about the inherent dystopianism contained within every utopia, that utopias are necessary, but also reflections of the existence of terrible things in their conception. idk. there’s something in there, I know it!! but i suppose what I want to say is -- i do not think the daozhangs understand class and social hierarchy very deeply because they don’t see a need to examine it deeply. for their goals, the details aren’t the point. they’re not looking to reform within the system, they’re looking to build something outside of it. I think they spend a lot of time concerned with alleviating the symptoms of social oppression, and their values reflect the injustices they witness there.

regardless, even if their story ends in tragedy and there is a certain amount of critique re: the utopian approach, i think the text still emphasizes that xiao xingchen left a utopia and that he thought that people mattered enough for him to try, and that was an incredibly honorable, kind, and human thing to do.

YEAH SURE THE DAOZHANGS ARE THE SIMPLEST ok ok RETURNING to class and moving forward: xue yang.

i also don’t think xue yang has class consciousness lol, or not in any way that really matters, but I do think poverty impacted him in a much stronger way than it impacted wei wuxian. wei wuxian spent some years on the street as a child. xue yang grew up on the streets. chang ci’an’s horrific treatment of him was directly due to his class and social standing: chang ci’an is a nobleman and xue yang is not even worth the dirt beneath the wheels of his cart. what I think is the seminal point though, is that this does not make xue yang think particularly deeply about systemic injustice, because xue yang is so self-centered, self-driven, and individualistic. he is not even slightly concerned about how poverty and class might affect other people -- they’re other people. what he takes away from his experience is not an anger at being wrongfully cheated by a system, but an anger at being wrongfully cheated by a specific man.

xue yang is not particularly concerned with the politics of the aristocracy -- he has no obvious ambitions other than, “i want to eat sweets whenever i please”, “i want to hurt anyone who wrongs me”, and “i want to be so strong that no one can hurt me”. like, he just doesn’t care -- it’s not the kind of power he wants. he sneers at people for like, personal reasons, not class reasons -- “you think you’re better than me” re: xiao xingchen and song lan. to him, all people -- poor, wealthy, noble, common -- are essentially equal, and they are all beneath him. after all, what does he care what family someone comes from, how much money they have? everyone bleeds when you cut them. some of them might be harder to get to than others, but xue yang does not fear that sort of thing. it’s just another obstacle he needs to vault on his way to getting revenge and/or a pastry.

ANYWAYS onto jin guangyao (wow this is hm. getting rather long ahaha oh dear): I would argue that the two characters with the most acute understanding of class/societal politics and the injustice of them are jin guangyao and lan xichen. i’ll start with jin guangyao for obvious reasons.

where xue yang took the damaging effects of poverty as personal slights, I think jin guangyao is painfully aware that there is nothing personal about them, which is, in some ways, much worse. why are two sons, born on the same day to the same father, treated so differently? just because.

he watched his mother struggle and starve and work herself to the bone in a profession where she was constantly disrespected and abused for almost nothing in return, while his father could have lifted her out of poverty with the wave of a finger. why didn’t he? because he didn’t like her? no -- because he didn’t care, and the structures of the society they live in protect that kind of blase treatment of the lower class.

“so my mother couldn’t choose her own fate, is that her fault?” jin guangyao demands. he knows that he is unbelievably talented, that he has ambition, that he has potential, and that all of it is beyond his grasp just because his father didn’t want to bother with it. his mother’s life was destroyed, and his own opportunities were crippled with that negligence. it isn’t personal. that’s just the way things are. your individual identity is meaningless, your humanity does not exist. when he’s kicked down the steps of jinlin tai, it’s just more confirmation that no matter how talented or hardworking he is, no one will give him the time of day unless he finds a way to take it himself and become someone who “matters”.

jin guangyao’s cultivation is weak because he had a poor foundation, and he had a poor foundation because he was denied access to a good one. he copies others because that’s all he can do at this point, and he copies so well that he can hold his own against some of the strongest cultivators of his generation. he’s disparaged for copying and “stealing” techniques, but -- he never would have had to if only he had been born/accepted into the upper class. the fact is that i really do think jin guangyao was the most promising cultivator of his generation that we meet, including the twin jades and wei wuxian: he had natural talent, ambition, creativity, determination and cunning in spades. in some ways, I think that’s one of the overlooked tragedies of jin guangyao: the loss of not just the good man he could have been, but the powerful one too. imagine what he could have done.

jin guangyao spends his entire time in the world of the aristocracy feeling unsteady and terrified because he knows exactly how precarious his position is. he knows how easy it is to lose power, especially for someone like him. he’s working against so many disadvantages, and every scrap of honor he gets is a vicious battle. jin guangyao fears, and I think that’s something that’s lacking in xue yang, wei wuxian and the daozhangs’ experiences/understandings of poverty. i think it’s precisely that fear that emphasizes jin guangyao’s understanding of class and blood. jin guangyao exhibits an anxiety that neither wei wuxian nor xue yang do, and it’s because he truly knows how little he is worth in the eyes of society and how little there is he can do to change that. to me, it very much feels related to the anxiety of not knowing if tomorrow you’ll have something to eat, if tomorrow you’ll still have a home, if tomorrow someone will destroy you and never have to answer for it. it’s the anxiety of knowing helplessness intimately.

moreover, jin guangyao is the only person shown to use the wealth and power at his disposal to take concrete steps to actually help the common people typically ignored by the powerful -- the watchtowers. they’re described in chapter 42. it’s a system that is designed to cover remote areas that most cultivators are reluctant to go due to their inconvenience and the lack of means of the people who live there. the watchtowers assign cultivators to different posts, give aid to those previously forgotten, and if the people are too poor to pay what the cultivators demand, the lanling jin sect pays for it. jin guangyao worked on this for five years and burned a lot of bridges over it. people were strongly opposed to it, thinking that it was some kind of ploy for lanling jin’s personal benefit. but the thing is -- it worked. they were effective. people were helped.

i believe CQL frames the watchtowers as an allegory for a surveillance state/centralized control (i think?? it’s been a minute -- that’s the hazy impression i remember, something like a parallel to the wen supervisory offices?), but I personally don’t think that was the intent in the novel. the watchtowers are a public good. lanling jin doesn’t staff them with their own sect members -- they get nearby sects to staff them. it’s a warning network that they fund that’s supposed to benefit everyone, even those that everyone had considered expendable.

(did jin guangyao do terrible things to achieve this goal? yeah lol. it’s not confirmed, but his son sure did die... suspiciously...... at the hands of an outspoken critic of the watchtowers........ whom he then executed....... so like, maybe just a convenient coincidence for jin guangyao, two birds one stone, but. it seems. Unlikely.)

lan xichen is the only member of the gentry that ever shows serious compassion for and nuanced understanding of jin guangyao’s circumstances. lan xichen treats him as his equal regardless of jin guangyao’s current status -- even when he was meng yao, lan xichen treated him as a human being worthy of respect, as someone with great merits, as someone he would choose as a friend, but he did so knowing full well the delicate position meng yao occupied. this is in direct contrast to nie mingjue, who also believed that meng yao was worthy of respect as a human being, but was completely unable to comprehend the complexities of his circumstances and unwilling to grant him any grace. you know, the difference between “i acknowledge that your birth and status have had effects upon you, but I don’t think less of you for it” and “i don’t consider your birth and status at all when i interact with you because i think it is irrelevant” (“i don’t see color” anyone?)

to illustrate, from chapter 48:

大抵是觉得娼妓之子身上说不定也带着什么不干净的东西，这几名修士接过他双手奉上来的茶盏后，并不饮下，而是放到一边，还取出雪白的手巾，很难受似的，有意无意反复擦拭刚才碰过茶盏的手指。聂明玦并非细致之人，未曾注意到这种细节，魏无羡却用眼角余光扫到了这些。孟瑶视若未见，笑容不坠半分，继续奉茶。蓝曦臣接过茶盏之时，抬眸看他一眼，微笑道：“多谢。”

旋即低头饮了一口，这才继续与聂明玦交谈。旁的修士见了，有些不自在起来。

rough tl:

Probably because they believed that the son of a prostitute might also carry some unclean things upon his person, after these few cultivators took the teacups offered from [Meng Yao’s] two hands, they did not drink, but instead put them to one side, and furthermore brought out snow white handkerchiefs. Quite uncomfortably, and whether they were aware of it or not, they repeatedly wiped the fingers they had just used to touch the teacups. Nie Mingjue was not a detail-oriented person and never took note of such particulars, but Wei Wuxian caught these in the corner of his eye. Meng Yao appeared as if he had not seen, his smile unwavering in the slightest, and continued to serve tea. When Lan Xichen took the teacup, he glanced up at him and, smiling, said, “Thank you.”

He immediately dipped his head to take a sip, and only then continued to converse with Nie Mingjue. Seeing this, the nearby cultivators began to feel somewhat uneasy.

all right, since we’re in full cyan-rampaging-through-the-weeds mode at this point, i’m going to talk about how this is one of my favorite 3zun moments in the entire novel for characterization purposes because it really highlights how they all relate to one another, and to what degree each of them is aware of their own position in relation to the others and society as a whole.

1. nie mingjue, who is a forthright and blunt person, sets meng yao to serving tea and is done with it. he notices nothing wrong or inappropriate about the reactions of the people in the room because it’s not the sort of thing he considers important.

2. meng yao, knowing that his only avenue is to take it lying down with a smile, masks perfectly.

3. lan xichen, noticing all this, uses his own reputation to achieve two things at once: pointedly shame the other cultivators in attendance, and show meng yao that regardless of others’ opinions, he considers him an equal and does not endorse such behavior--and he does it while taking care that no fallout will come down on meng yao’s head.

is this yet another installment of cyan’s endless lxc defense thesis? why yes it is! no one is surprised! but this is my whole point: both meng yao and lan xichen understand the respective hierarchy and power dynamics within the room, while nie mingjue very much does not. this is not because nie mingjue is a bad person or because nie mingjue is stupid--it’s a combination of personality and upbringing. nie mingjue is straightforward and has no patience for such games. but then again, he can afford not to play because he was born into such a high position: that’s a privilege.

to break it down: meng yao knows that he is the lowest-ranked person in the room, sees the way people are subtly disrespecting him in full view of his general who is doing nothing about it. in some ways, this is good -- nie mingjue’s style of dealing with conflict is very direct and not at all suited to delicate political maneuvering. after all, the way he promoted meng yao was actually quite dangerous to meng yao: he essentially guaranteed that his men would bear meng yao a grudge and that their disrespect for him would only be compounded by their bitterness at being punished on his behalf. (it’s like, why often getting parents or teachers to intervene ineffectively in bullying can just be an incitement to more bullying -- same concept) meng yao’s reaction during that scene shows that he’s pretty painfully aware of this and is trying to defuse the situation to no avail. nie mingjue gives him a bootstrap speech (rip nie mingjue i love u so much but. sir) and then promotes him, which is pretty much the only saving grace of that entire exchange, for meng yao at least.

lan xichen, on the other hand, understands both that meng yao is the lowest-ranked person in the room and that any direct attempt to chastise the other cultivators in the room will only serve to hurt meng yao in the long run. he knows that if this were brought to nie mingjue’s attention, he would be outraged and not shy about it -- also bad for meng yao. so he uses what he has: his immaculate reputation. by acting contrary to the other cultivators’ behavior, he demonstrates that he finds their actions unacceptable but with the plausible deniability that it wasn’t directed at them, that this is just zewu-jun being his usual generous self. this means that the other cultivators have no one to blame but themselves, nothing to do but question their own actions. there is nowhere to cast off their discomfort. meng yao didn’t do anything. lan xichen didn’t do anything -- he just thanked meng yao and drank his tea, isn’t that what it’s there for? he doesn’t disrupt the peace, he doesn’t attack anyone and put them on the defensive, but he does make his position very clear.

i know this is a really small thing and i’m probably beating it to death, but I really think this shows just how cognizant lan xichen is of politics and emotional cause and effect in such situations. certainly, out of context I think the scene reads kind of cliche, but within the greater narrative of the story and within the arc of these characters specifically, I think it was a really smart scene to include. it also showcases lan xichen’s style of action: that he moves around and with a problematic situation as opposed to moving straight through.

not to be salty on main again, but this is why it’s very frustrating to me when I see people call lan xichen passive when he is anything but. his actions just don’t look like traditional “actions”, especially to an american audience. it’s easy to understand lan wangji and wei wuxian’s style of problem-solving: taking a stand, moving through, staying strong. lan xichen is juggling an inconceivable number of factors in any given situation, weighing his responsibilities in one role against those in another, and then trying to find the path through the thicket that will cause the least harm, both to himself and the thicket. lan wangji and wei wuxian are not particularly good at considering the far-reaching consequences of their actions -- again, not because they are bad people, but because of a combination of personality and upbringing. they’d just hack through the thicket, not thinking about the creatures that live in it. that is not a terrible thing! it isn’t. it’s a different way of approaching a problem, and it has different priorities. that’s okay. there are advantages and disadvantages on both sides, and where you come down is going to depend on your personal values.

okay we’ve spiraled far and away from my original point, but let’s circle back: i was talking about class.

I think it’s undeniable that class, birthright, fate etc. are some of the driving forces of thematic conflict in mdzs, and the way each character interacts with those forces reveals a lot about themselves and also about the larger themes of fate, chance, and what it means to be righteous and good and how that is and isn’t rewarded. a lot of the tragedy of mdzs (the tragedy that isn’t caused by direct aggression on the part of one group or another) stems from the injustices and slights that people suffered due to their lot in life. it isn’t fair. none of it is fair! we sympathize with jin guangyao because we recognize that what he suffered was unconscionable, even if we don’t excuse him. i sympathize A Lot with xue yang as well for similar reasons, though I understand that’s a harder sell. this is a story focused on the mistakes of an entrenched, aging gentry and the effects that those mistakes had on their children, and a lot of it has to do with prejudice based in class and birth status. whether the prejudice was the true reason or whether it was just a convenient excuse, the fact remains that the systems in place rewarded and protected the people in power who used it to cling to that power. mdzs is also a story of how the circumstances of one’s life can offer you impossible choices that you cannot abstain from, and it asks us to be compassionate to the people who made terrible choices in terrible times. it’s about the inherent complexity in all things! that sometimes, there are no good choices, and i don’t know, i’d like to think that people would show me compassion if I had to make the choices some of these characters did. not just wei wuxian, mind you, every single one of them. except jin guangshan because I Do Hate Him sorry. and i guess wen ruohan. i think that’s it.

good. GOD this is clocking in at //checks notes -- just over 5k. 8′D *stuffs some weeds into my mouth like the clown i am*

(ko-fi? :’D *lies down*)

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stiltonbasket · 3 years

Note

for the qin su!wwx verse: i would love to the either the conversation where wangxian decide to have a biological kid, or the conversation where they find out they’re Having xiao-yu, whoops 😄😄😄

After Lan Xichen gives them the news, Wei Wuxian sits mutely on the sofa and tries to wrap his head around the three words that just left his would-be dabaizi’s lips. Next to him, Lan Zhan looks like a stunned fish, gaping at Zewu-jun like a trout out of water, and even Nie Mingjue blinks in astonishment before glancing back at his husband.

“Xichen, you’re absolutely sure he’s--?”

“We have five children,” Lan Xichen says in a strangled voice, sounding as if he would dearly like to scream. “Trust me, I can recognize the symptoms better than most. Wei-gongzi, do you remember when you last had your monthly courses?”

Wei Wuxian jerks back to life and shakes his head. “I’ve never had them,” he says faintly. “Qin Su never needed to keep track of her cycles, so she took thistle tea to stop them from happening, and I kept on drinking it after she summoned me. I thought--Zewu-jun, don’t women need their monthly courses to conceive? How could I have possibly...”

“It only stops the bleeding,” Lan Xichen corrects him. “That particular medicine is usually prescribed to young girls, not married women, lest a pregnancy go unnoticed for longer than normal. It’s not a contraceptive.”

Wei Wuxian fights the urge to claw at his robes and shriek. Of course he always knew that Qin Su had no need for contraceptive teas, since Jin Guangyao never came to her bed, but surely it was reasonable to think that preventing the monthly blood would also prevent a--

A baby, he thinks dumbly. Lan Zhan and I aren’t even married, since the year of mourning for Qin-guniang isn’t up yet, and I’m expecting a child in her body.

“You must go to the healers as soon as you can,” Lan Xichen urges, while Wei Wuxian has a miniature breakdown on the sofa before putting himself back together again. “There are certain foods that must be consumed while with child, and some things that you must not touch at all, like alcohol and raw meat. Young Master Wei, are you listening to me?”

“Hah,” he croaks. “Lan Zhan, I need--some fresh air, I--”

Hardly a split second later, Lan Zhan picks him up and whisks him out of the hanshi, carrying him down the hill towards the jingshi so he can catastrophize in peace and quiet. Or at least quiet, since Wei Wuxian supposes he won’t be getting any peace for the next twenty-odd years, now.

“Why do you think so?” Lan Zhan frowns, bringing a basin of cold water for his feet. “Wei Ying, talk to me. Are you well?”

Wei Wuxian tries to wrestle his tongue into something resembling coherent speech, and fails. Beside him, Lan Zhan’s cheeks go a chalky white, and he suddenly looks as if someone had slapped him across the face--and then Wei Wuxian hears him take a great gulp, as if to strengthen his will for the conversation ahead.

“If you do not want this child,” he whispers, “I know you are not--this is a difficult thing for women, let alone men in bodies unsuited for their souls. It cannot be too far along yet, since we--I mean, it can only be three months at the very latest, so perhaps--”

The very idea of it is enough to stop Wei Wuxian’s breath. “Are you mad, Lan Zhan?” he demands, in a near-shout. “How could you say such a thing? I would never--Lan Zhan, that’s your child! Our child! Say you’re sorry, right now!”

Lan Zhan frowns. “You want the baby?”

“Yes! Yes, of course I do!” Wei Wuxian cries, valiantly trying to blink back a tear as Lan Zhan takes his hand. “Haven’t you heard me talking about adopting more brothers and sisters for Sizhui? I’ve certainly been thinking about it ever since you told me he was still alive! How could you think I’d ever want to get rid of--do you not want our little one, Lan Zhan?”

“I loved this child the moment Xiongzhang told us of its existence,” Lan Zhan says, his voice breaking like a piece of sugar candy snapping in half. “But I had to tell you, Wei Ying, even if it killed me to do so. I can bear anything but the thought of you suffering, now.”

“Well, I’m not suffering,” Wei Ying chuckles wetly. “We’re going to have this little cabbage, and A-Yuan will have a didi or a meimei, and Lan-xiansheng will have another niece or nephew to try to shave his beard off. All right?”

(As it turns out, it is very much all right, and the look Lan Zhan gives him is full of such radiant happiness that Wei Wuxian falls head over heels in love, all over again.

Half of that love is for the new tiny person sleeping under his heart, and Wei Wuxian suddenly wants more than anything to hold his child in his arms.)

___

Cloud Recesses, Gusu Lan to the Jinlintai, Lanling Jin

Peacock,

I know for a fact that Shijie didn’t choose Ling for A-Ling’s birth name, so you must be pretty good at picking names for babies. What would you name a child that was half of Yunmeng Jiang and half of Gusu Lan, and due around the middle of this fall?

Your best brother-in-law,

Wei Wuxian.

___

Jinlintai, Lanling Jin to Cloud Recesses, Gusu Lan

Wei Wuxian, you utter menace--

Please tell me this isn’t for your child. If it is, Jiang Wanyin will hunt me down and beat me to death with Zidian for failing in my duties as a chaperone, and then I’ll have been killed by both of A-Li’s brothers.

Yours in great distress,

Jin Zixuan.

___

Cloud Recesses, Gusu Lan to the Jinlintai, Lanling Jin

Sect Leader Jin:

My husband spent the whole morning crying after receiving your letter. Count yourself lucky that he did not let me read it, or I would have been making you a visit later today.

Regards,

Lan Wangji.

___

The Hanshi, Cloud Recesses, to the Jingshi, Cloud Recesses

(delivered by Young Master Nie Yunhai, minus the rice-paper envelope--which was probably eaten on the way, according to Lan Jueying. No one knows what happened to the enclosed sweet buns, and Lan Jingyi and company cannot be reached for further comment.)

A-Xian,

Will you come up and have tea with me? The little ones miss their Xian-shushu, and all of us are worried for you.

All my love,

Xichen-ge.

___

“Lan Zhan?”

“Yes?”

“Are you going to tell your brother that you haven’t let me out of bed for the past three days? He probably thinks I’m still crying over that letter from Jin Zixuan.”

“Mm, if he asks. But Wei Ying needs to rest and eat nourishing foods, and remain still until the dizziness passes, so Xiongzhang will understand. Go back to sleep, my love.”

#wangxian #mo dao zu shi #the untamed #qin su!wwx #my fic #warning for mentions of periods I guess?#nothing is described in any detail though #jzx upon receiving that letter: blocked. BLOCKED. none of you are free from sin

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canary3d-obsessed · 3 years

Text

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed, Episode 25 part two

(Masterpost) (Other Canary Stuff)

Warning! Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!

Jin Jerks Continued

Jin Furen is all judgy about Wei Wuxian, so it's hard to like her, since WWX is our protagonist and whatnot. But! Jin Furen is actually totally awesome. She adores Jiang Yanli and takes sides with her against her own son. She knows he likes Yanli and works her ass off to do all the courting for him, since he sucks at it, rather than picking a random wife for him and sticking him with her choice. She's always gentle with Yanli in her tone and body language. And Jin Zixuan had to get his good side from somebody.

Wei Wuxian politely tells Jin Furen that it's all over (again/still) between Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan, and cousin Jin Zixun rushes up to argue with him, saying he's being too proud and that he shouldn't talk to Jin Furen that way, since she is his senior. Wei Wuxian, still politely, explains the clan politics that underlie every one of these Zixuan-Yanli interactions. As a matter of clan pride, the Jiang Clan can't allow Yanli to be insulted.

Cousin Jin Zixun immediately goes all in on the clan rivalry, beefing with Wei Wuxian about how much prey he caught. Everybody forgets all about Yanli's situation while they talk about the hunt results instead.

The Jin cultivators--parroting what they heard from Jin Guangyao--say that Wei Wuxian has flute-walked 30 percent of the prey into nets by himself. Lan Wangji actually decides to react to something, saying "30 percent? and giving Wei Wuxian such a series of LOOKS, oh my god.

This Wangxian moment is an important one, I think, because it shows where Lan Wangji's priorities are, and they're...wrong. He's continually telling Wei Wuxian "be good," in one way or another; trying to help him back to the correct way of being a cultivator. Meanwhile the Lans are totally fine with the Jins being murderous shits who feel entitled to insult high-ranking ladies.

CJZX continues to snipe at Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji continues to judge WWX for being unsportsmanlike.

(more after the cut!)

Wei Wuxian says that he's just showing his capability, and CJZX tries to tell him both that 1. he's practicing evil cultivation and 2. he's just playing the flute. WWX offers him Chenqing and says "show me your capability" which I think is cultivator speak for "fight me, bitch."

Cousin Jin Zixun moves the goalposts, saying that Wei Wuxian broke the rules, and starts in with class-based dogwhistling, saying "it's understandable that you don't know the rules," and citing examples of Wei Wuxian’s previous bad manners at cultivation events.

Things escalate and pretty soon Wei Wuxian is yelling at everybody, threatening to tell them why he doesn't carry his sword, (which would actually clear up SO much) and saying he's going to beat them all using necromancy whatever is just this side of necromancy.

Cousin Jin Zixun tosses his birth status at him, and then it's ON. Scary music, shaking fist, Chenqing booting up...

Lan Wangji, who has been singularly unhelpful since CJZX started talking, suddenly forgets his judginess as he's swept into motion by his constant fear of whatever is going to happen next time Wei Wuxian loses his temper.

He rushes to Wei Wuxian’s side, grabs his wrist, says his name, and wills him to chill the fuck out. Jiang Yanli joins him, grabbing Wei Wuxian's other arm, and Wei Wuxian manages to get control of himself.

Queen Yanli

Yanli has had it, and she has Wei Wuxian stand behind her while she goes to politely reduce Cousin Jin Zixun to a heap of smoldering cinders.

First she recaps CJZX's accusations against Wei Wuxian; says she doesn't know a lot about the hunt, and apologizes formally on her brother’s behalf. WWX says "Shijie!" but she shakes her head at him and he shuts up.

CJZX laughs and tells her, in a tone designed to infuriate Wei Wuxian even further, that Wei Wuxian doesn’t rate her apologizing on his behalf, and says that their clans are like family; reinforcing WWX's outsider status. I don't think CJZX is taking orders from Jin Guangyao, because he's way too big of a snob for that, but he's definitely helping JGY to move his agenda forward.

Even Lan Wangji is having trouble staying cool during this exchange; he is focused on keeping Wei Wuxian in check but he’s also angry himself, judging from what his neck is doing here, anyway. *Stares at his neck for way too long*

Wei Wuxian is super upset about Jiang Yanli apologizing, and he’s unable to hold back tears, even with Lan Wangji using the power of extreme staring to help him.

Jiang Yangli is nowhere near finished, though and she turns around and proceeds to tell everyone that they suck, that it's not Wei Wuxian's fault if he's more talented than everybody else, and that they are just making up rules because they are a bunch of losers.

Clan Leader Yao has the nerve to say that they know the rules "in their hearts" which is just another class-based dogwhistle.

Yanli defends Wei Wuxian's cultivation method to everybody, saying it's something he worked at and put effort into--that it's different, not wrong. She's literally the only person who defends his cultivation style, even though they all have benefited from it.

Then she gets right up in Cousin Jin Zixun's face and tells him that it's not ok for him to insult WWX by calling him the son of a servant, and she wants CJZX to apologize. (full gifset here) All of the Jins and Captain Blowhard Clan Leader Yao are SHOCKED at this idea. Jin Furen tries to talk Yanli down but Yanli politely nopes her away, so JFR tells CJZX to apologize.

He's saved from having to actually do it by the arrival of Jin Guangyao and Lan Xichen, who jump down off a box fly over to find out what's wrong.

Jin Furen yells at smiley, blinkey Jin Guangyao, telling him he should be able to figure out what's wrong, saying "aren't you good at judging the situation," i.e. aren't you a conniving little creep? She's bitchy but she's not wrong.

When the "30 percent" thing is explained again, Lan Xichen gives Wei Wuxian the same Lan Glare of Sportsmanship Disappointment that his brother did.

Lan Xichen: It's fine for my boyfriend's obviously power-hungry family to insult my brother's war-hero best friend in a bid to reduce his social status, but him using magic powers in our magical creature hunt is super wrong.

Jin Guangyao and Lan Xichen explain that they're going to open up more area for the hunt, but it's too late to make Cousin Jin Zixun happy. He takes his ball and goes home.

The Breaking of the Fellowship

The remaining group stroll slowly through the woods, Jin Furen and Jiang Yanli together, while Wei Wuxian walks at a bit of a distance and Jin Zixuan follows right behind his mother. His mother offers to beat him to make Jiang Yanli feel better. See? Perfect Mother-in-Law material.

Jiang Yanli tries to leave again, and is stopped again. This time Jin Furen tries to convince her to come back to the stands to sit with her and Jin Zixuan, and not to go with Wei Wuxian. First she tries saying that it's not appropriate for her and Wei Wuxian to be alone together. Yanli shuts that right down, saying that Wei Wuxian is her didi. Then Jin Furen says that Wei Wuxian has "strong wicked energy" and that he may do something evil. Like fighting back when he is ambushed on his way to a party.

Jiang Yanli repeats that Wei Wuxian is her didi, and says that she'll never leave him. JFR keeps trying but Wei Wuxian steps up and takes Yanli by the wrist and goes to lead her away. Jin Zixuan finally, FINALLY admits that he likes Jiang Yanli.

He is embarrassed, Jiang Yanli is delighted, and Lan Xichen is amused.

Jin Zixuan runs away and Jiang Yanli agrees to go back to Jinlintai with Jin Furen. Wei Wuxian is super immature unhappy about it....

....but he accepts her decision, in a nearly wordless exchange that we’ll see echoes of much later, between him and Lan Wangji. (Exceptionally cruel gifset here)

Wei Wuxian formally bows to Jin Furen, asking her to take care of his sister. Because he recognizes this for the parting that it is.

Jiang Yanli isn't wrong to make this choice. She deserves to be happy, and married women in this environment can't live with their original family. But she told Wei Wuxian, over and over, that the three of them have to stick together, only to change course and leave him behind with no warning. It’s not even five minutes since she said "I will never leave him." Wei Wuxian isn’t the only person making impossible promises in these parts.

Jiang Cheng and some Jiang cultivators show up, and everyone, including Wei Wuxian, tells Jiang Cheng that he missed an important scene, but nobody will tell him what actually happened.

Wei Wuxian says he's going into town, and he leaves Jiang Cheng behind just as abruptly as Jiang Yanli left him.

Jiang Cheng asks Lan Xichen what happened, and Lan Xichen says "there was an argument but it's mostly smoothed over now; also, Jin Zixuan says he likes your sister." Ha ha ha ha! Of course he does not say that, he says "You should ask your sister at the banquet" and Jin Guangyao says it wouldn't be appropriate for them, as outsiders, to comment.

I would like to see Jiang Cheng respond to this by beating the crap out of them with Zidian for being a couple of coy bitches, but he just furrows his brow.

JGY hangs back from the group for a second to tell JC that WWX is sooooo great, before they all head back to Jinlintai.

Insecurest Boi

As everyone is walking Jiang Cheng hears Captain Blowhard saying that Lotus Pier made a strong impression today, and that they'll be able to recruit a whole lot of disciples. The cultivators are of two opinions about whether having Wei Wuxian is a good thing for a clan.

Then a Jin cultivator says he heard that the Yin tiger amulet is made of the missing piece of Yin iron. He says he overheard it from Jin Guangyao. He says even if it's not for certain, the timing fits. Jiang Cheng reacts to this as if he 100% believes it, because Jiang Cheng is a dumbass sometimes.

He should just frickin’ ask Wei Wuxian about the amulet. Lan Wangji asked where he got it and Wei Wuxian told him, and Jiang Cheng, while they have their issues, is officially on WWX's side, so there’s no reason for WWX not to tell him.

The Jin cultivator goes on to say that the Jiang Clan ain't shit, that all their deeds belong to Wei Wuxian. Jiang Cheng takes all of this on board totally unfiltered. Literally everything that any Jin cultivator other than MianMian says is propaganda coming from Jin Guangyao, but Jiang Cheng thinks they're friends and doesn't know how to recognize manipulation.

Jiang Cheng is hearing the exact same criticism that Jiang Yanli heard, but he's not equipped to handle it, and instead of fighting back he gets angry at Wei Wuxian. Despite all his recent growth, he is still crushingly insecure, and this is hitting him right in his tenderest spot. Jiang Fengmian has a lot to answer for.

Instant Replacement Sister

Wei Wuxian is off working through his own feelings; he's wandering the street in Lanling with a bottle of wine in hand. Wen Qing, in her red Wen robe and her hooded cloak, is wandering the street in the opposite direction. They pass each other without seeing, in a moment that's excruciating to watch the first time.

But then some Jin cultivators obligingly push her to the ground, and Wei Wuxian, with his beautiful heart of fucking gold, hears someone who needs help and turns around.

For a moment he smiles in recognition, before the smile clouds over. Wen Qing, for her part, looks horrified; perhaps it’s everything she’s going through, but perhaps she can see that he, in his own way, is struggling nearly as much as she is. Meeting with her will galvanize him and give him the life direction he desperately needs.

A Day Late and a Tael Short

Lan Wangji wants to solve Wei Wuxian's problem, but he lacks imagination, so his best idea is to hide him in Cloud Recesses.

Lan Xichen points out that Wei Wuxian might not be on board with that. This conversation is short, but it has some layers, once you know about their parents' relationship. Lan Wangji frowns but doesn't have a second idea.

#the untamed #the untamed gifs #wangxian #jiang cheng #jiang yanli #clan leader yao #canary3d-original #my gifs #restless rewatch the untamed

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bigbadredpanda · 4 years

Note

Hi Panda, would you happen to know what the Chinese fandom consensus on Madam Lan's backstory is? The consensus in English fandom seems to be that she was a victim of the Lan sect & abused by Qinheng-jun, but before I saw that I thought her and Qinheng-jun and the Lan sect had a misunderstanding, like wangxian in the cave vs the Lan elders after Nightless City, that sort of thing? The difference is so huge I need like an extra 2nd, 3rd, 4th and 50th opinion haha

Hi there! Mmn yes, it’s an interesting question, that part of the story is left ambiguous and led to a lot of speculation. I don’t think there’s really a consensus whether on the Chinese side or the international side. However, I’m not sure we can qualify what happened with Madam Lan and Wei Wuxian a misunderstanding. In my opinion, it’s more a difference of morality. What they did was justified from their perspective while in the eyes of others they have committed a grave crime.

Let’s look at the facts or at least what we assume to be facts.

Qingheng-Jun was a well-known and well-respected young man with a promising future ahead of him but he threw that away when he suddenly decided to marry and live in seclusion at a young age (弱冠之龄 according to the novel, the age when one receives during a coming of age ceremony the crown-like ornament men wore in their hair. It was historically 20 years old but MXTX lowered it to 15 in her setting to have the characters using courtesy names. I’m assuming that Qingheng-Jun is still meant to be 20. Anyway, brief digression). On his way home from a night hunt, he supposedly fell in love at first sight with a woman. However, that woman did not return his affect and killed his master. It’s unclear if that happened after their meeting or before. To protect her from reprisal from his Sect, Qingheng-Jun brought her to the Cloud Recesses in secret and performed with her the three bows that bound them together in marriage. Then, as an act of penance, he went in seclusion and locked away his wife in a separate cottage. That union eventually led to the birth of two sons. (Ch.64)

Of course, the big question is why did she kill Qingheng-Jun’s master? I use master because the term used here is 恩师, an honorific for an esteemed teacher towards whom the student feels grateful for his tutelage. The answer to that question is given by Lan Xichen:

“我不知，但想来无非‘恩怨是非’四个字罢了。”

“I do no know but it is assumed that it came down to a ‘dispute over a past grievance’.

This is fascinating as it explains everything and nothing. 是非 is literally ‘right and wrong’, the two characters together can mean ‘quarrel’. 恩怨 is also made up of the juxtaposition of two characters with opposite meanings, ‘gratitude and grudges’ (the same character 恩 is used in the teacher honorific above). It’s a concept rooted in Chinese culture that features particularly prominently in wuxia/xianxia genres where the notions of justice and honour are core precepts. This term designates old scores that need settling, a debt that has to to be repaid sometimes tenfold. To put it simply, when someone does you or your family a favour, you have a debt of gratitude toward them. When someone wrongs you or your family, you develop a grudge towards them out of deep-seated enmity.

Wei Wuxian is the prime example of this, he went to great lengths to return the kindness he was shown by the Yunmeng Jiang Sect and by the Wen siblings. To him, it’s a moral imperative, he was duty-bound to do so just like he was duty-bound to take revenge against the Qishan Wen Sect.

It’s this same concept that motivates other characters in the story. For instance, Wen Zhuliu’s steadfast loyalty stems from a debt of gratitude (知遇之恩), Wen Ruohan recognised his worth and accepted him within the Wen Clan (hence why he changed his name to Wen) and he cannot leave that debt unpaid (Ch.62). Xue Yang repays the grudge he held against Chang Cian tenfold by exterminating the entire Yueyang Chang Sect (Ch.30).

Coming back to Madam Lan. I’ve seen some speculation from Chinese fans about the origin of that ‘grievance’ between her and Qingheng-Jun’s master. Because of the age gap between them, it is surmised that this is something that happened one generation back. Perhaps he brought harm or even killed Madam Lan’s elder, parent or teacher. It was a duty for Qingheng-Jun to bring her to justice and see about that her crime did not go unpunished. Depending on the gravity of the situation, he might have been well within his rights to kill her himself in retaliation. Instead of pursuing that cycle of revenge, he took another path that protected the woman he loved but also punished the one who had killed his master. Because he went against the Gusu Lan Sect by marrying her in secret, his penitence is to live in seclusion, separate from her and from the affairs of his Sect.

In the Chinese fandom, it is assumed that Madam Lan must have been a woman with impressive skills if she managed to kill a Gusu Lan Sect elder. Did she resist capture from Qingheng-Jun and was forcibly taken to the Cloud Recesses? Did she resign herself to her fate and accepted being confined as punishment? Did she comply and eventually grew fond of the man who became her husband? We don’t know but Lan Xichen remembers his mother as a gentle person who never voiced a complaint about her own situation.

The exact circumstances are shrouded with mystery but most meta and fics I’ve read in the Chinese fandom tend to be of the opinion that love eventually developed between Qingheng-Jun and Madam Lan. But of course, that’s the way we would rather have. What is sure is that this was a tragic ending for all parties involved, including the children left behind.

I’ve also learnt something very very interesting from the meta I’ve read concerning the gentians growing near Madam Lan’s cottage. We know that MXTX has paid special attention to flower meanings with the peony that Wei Wuxian threw to Lan Wangji in Yiling (Ch.71). The flower's alternative name is 将离花, flower of impending separation or flower for saying goodbye soon, a peony can be a parting gift between lovers or would-be lovers forced apart and can have the undertones of "Will you be with me before we part?", "Will you wait for me?" In the audio drama, it’s made clear that Wei Wuxian knew the intended meaning before offering Lan Wangji the flower. Well, due to their bitter roots, in the Chinese flower language, gentians stand for 爱上忧伤的你. Which is. Wheeze. “You’re beautiful in your melancholy.”

In the end, Qingheng-Jun and Madam Lan‘s story is used in the novel to act as a foil to Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji’s relationship. In the past, Lan Wangji also wished to bring Wei Wuxian to the Cloud Recesses and hide him away there. But he couldn’t bring himself to because Wei Wuxian was ‘not willing’ (Ch.72). Interestingly, this story is also framed to contrast with Lan Xichen and Jin Guangyao who are sworn brothers. Remember that it’s Lan Xichen himself that recounts his parents’ story to Wei Wuxian after they have found evidence of Jin Guangyao’s treachery. Just like his father before him, he is torn between personal feelings and his duty to his sect, two conflicting allegiances. When he is asking Wei Wuxian’s opinion of whether his father did was right, what would have been the right thing to do, he is also looking for an answer for himself. Lan Wangji had made his own choice at the aftermath of the Nightless City massacre. He protected Wei Wuxian and brought him back to Burial Mounds, he took responsibility for injuring his Sect’s elders by returning to the Cloud Recesses and accepting being flayed by the discipline whip. He managed to reconcile personal devotion and his family/Sect duties with his own principles and harbours no regret.

#mo dao zu shi #mdzs meta #answers #kumipen

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songofclarity · 3 years

Note

Tell me more about Wen Yuan as Wen Ruohan's son. Does he remember his father? One day draw him? Go: Hey I remembered what my dad looks like.

Lan Wangji: *sweats*

Or something else. How would Sizhui feel about Ruohan being his father? Would Wen Ning reveal it? If he is forced to? Etc?

After becoming sick in the Burial Mounds, Wen Yuan forgets all about the Wens and Wei WuXian, but considering he remembers them all later, the memories are still there somewhere. All is not lost!

Which means we deserve Wen-turned-Lan Yuan having Rapunzel-like moments during his temporary amnesia where he draws suns on everything. Very bright yet innocent suns drudged up from forgotten places. And maybe one day he draws a man! A man wearing white robes just like the Lans--Oh..

Oh, it is not a Lan. Lan Yuan has drawn some suns on the white robe... A golden guan? Wait, is that a sun on the guan, too...?

Lan Yuan, happily: "Yes! I saw it in my dream!"

Lan WangJi: *sweats*

Now we time jump thirteen years after he was adopted as a Lan to when he regains his memories at ~eighteen years old. Suddenly he remembers Wei WuXian! He remembers the Burial Mounds and the Wen Remnants! He remembers he was a Wen!

He remembers... everything down to when he was three years old. He might remember Qiongqi Path because it was traumatic and on the borderline, but...

He has forgotten Wen RuoHan. He has forgotten his mother. He has forgotten Nightless City. Because there is a quirk in the human brain that results in a phenomenon called Childhood Amnesia: we all forget our memories from when when we were three and under by the time we are an adult.

Which means only Wen Ning alone would know the whole truth of Wen Yuan's birth parents. Not even Wei WuXian knew the truth, much less Lan WangJi. Wen Ning is just a treasure trove of reveals in MDZS! (Bless him!)

Important canon to remember (from ch. 111, in case I forget): after Lan SiZhui reveals he remembers he is a Wen to Wangxian, he already had plans to go immediately with Wen Ning to bury the ashes of the Wens in Qishan. Wen Ning also tells Wei WuXian he plans to build a cenotaph for Wen Qing. Wei WuXian offers to go with them, but Wen Ning turns him down and tells him to go with Lan WangJi instead.

Now a consideration: Wen Qing was important to both Wen Ning and Wei WuXian, so why would Wen Ning basically turn Wei WuXian away? Perhaps it is because there are even more memories and stories Wen Ning wants to tell Lan SiZhui in privacy: namely, the truth of his father and his origins in Nightless City!

Once Lan SiZhui remembers he is a Wen, I don't think there would be harm in telling him Wen RuoHan was his father. He is happy with his Lan family and Lan WangJi has been a great brother/father figure, of course, but I think it would be important to him culturally and personally to know everything and reconnect with those roots.

Plus Wen Ning and Lan SiZhui bonding time!

Lan SiZhui finding out Wen Chao and Wen Xu were his brothers, and considering what they did to Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi respectively, might actually be the worst part as those crimes hit so close to home. His brothers treated Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi cruelly, but Wangxian both treated Lan SiZhui kindly.

Lan SiZhui grew up kind because being cruel is not what makes a Wen. There are good people and bad people, good Wen and bad Wen.

And the stories say Wen RuoHan was bad...

But the one telling him about his family and their past is Wen Ning! Wen Ning at one point believed he was the last Wen, and yet he never criticized or blamed Wen RuoHan for anything that had happened. Not once does he ever describe or treat Wen RuoHan like a person to be feared. Wen Ning even undermined Wen Chao without a second thought! Wen Qing, a hero to all the Wen Remnants, was a favorite of Wen RuoHan's, too, and she never said anything bad about Wen RuoHan, either. Regardless of whatever picture the world has painted of him, Wen RuoHan was good to his family and Wen Ning would know!

Wen Ning could describe to Lan SiZhui what it was like to live in Nightless City and what the people and culture were like at home. Events, festivities, competitions! New faces and old!

But Wen Ning was shy and he often got lost in the background. He wouldn't speak up so sometimes he was left behind and ignored. So his stories are full of gaps and missing pieces. Many of his stories are supplemented by what Wen Qing told him. Maybe he has forgotten or misremembered many things.

All too soon Lan SiZhui might long to have actually lived in Nightless City and have known Wen RuoHan himself, as children so often long to know their birth parents. Would he have been comfortable growing up in Nightless City? Would he have liked Wen RuoHan? Would Wen RuoHan have liked him? Wen Ning reveals how Wen RuoHan wasn't just a great cultivator, but enjoyed encouraging the talents of others, such as Wen Qing and (regrettably) Meng Yao. What talent in Lan SiZhui would Wen RuoHan have recognized? Lan SiZhui learned the guqin because Lan WangJi knew the guqin, but what cultivation technique would he use if he grew up as Wen Yuan in Nightless City?

Lan SiZhui and Wen Ning arrive in Qishan and stand on an empty, deserted road. A road where Wen cultivators used to walk about and gossip, because gossip was not forbidden here. A road where Wen cultivators used to talk in loud voices and laugh, because there were no rules about silence here.

Everything is silent now. Everything is quiet. Surely a part of Lan SiZhui's thoughts would weigh heavily on the family and home he never got to know, and the father who had, by all means, made him feel safe and loved once upon a time that he cried out to him for help when lost on the busy streets of Yiling.

After all, "SiZhui" means "to long for" and it would be nice if he was allowed to embrace his own new identity by longing for what he himself has lost.

#asked from above #anon #wen yuan #lan sizhui #wen ruohan #wen ning #wen fam #mdzs thoughts

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adhd-wifi · 4 years

Text

Why Not? AU Where Wei Ying Has His Birth Parents And Isn’t A Cultivator (Part 1)

Kinda a fic idea I’ve had in mind for a while, I’m never gonna write it cuz it’s long and I suck at committing to long fics for the most part but damn it won’t leave me alone and I wanted to share it lol. I’m splitting it into parts for now, cuz otherwise this will be too fucking long, but anyway here’s part one:

Wei ChangZe and CangSe Sanren are alive and take care of Wei Ying while maintaining a decent relationship with the Jiang Sect purely out of sentiment

CangSe Sanren remains a rogue cultivator, while Wei ChangZe is a skilled fighter but not a proper cultivator due to being a servant for the Jiang Sect for most of his life

Madam Yu still doesn’t like the Wei family but is civil with them cuz Jiang FengMian isn’t as neglectful since he’s not dealing with the grief of losing his best friend and first love

Jiang Cheng and Wei Ying do not like each other (they’re lying), Jiang YanLi loves them both

Wei Ying isn’t scared of dogs in this AU cuz he never had to fight them for survival, though he’s indifferent to them

He prefers rabbits

The Wei family travels for most of Wei Ying’s childhood, but eventually settle in Yiling, and Wei Ying begins learning to read and fight (self-defence)

Wei Ying is fascinated by cultivation, but doesn’t really want to be a cultivator cuz he thinks they’re too hung up on status and politics

Let’s be honest tho he ain’t wrong

He does want to learn how to use a sword though, and the Jiang Sect allows him to be a non-official disciple for a few years to learn

Madam Yu and his mom train him together sometimes (as Jiang FengMian has to train the actual disciples and also cuz Madam Yu doesn’t want him alone with CangSe Sanren)

CangSe Sanren also helps train Jiang Cheng and Jiang YanLi in using talismans and the like, since neither Jiang parent has her level of skill with those

Outside of the Jiang Sect, the Wei parents tends to help and befriend smaller sects when they travel to night hunt (Jiang Sect play babysitter for Wei Ying during these times)

As a result, they have minor connections to the Baling OuYang Sect, Yueyang Chang Sect, and MianMian’s unnamed sect (novel-canon, and I’m probably gonna name it the Tanzhou Yang Sect for reasons)

As a result, Wei Ying is casual friends with some kids his age from said sects, such as OuYang ZiZhen’s future parents and MianMian herself

However he doesn’t meet anyone from the major sects outside the Jiang family and disciples (yet)

Around the time Jiang Cheng goes to study in Gusu, Wei Ying completes his sword training and turns down Jiang FengMian’s offer to stay as a proper disciple

Jiang FengMian gifts him with a non-spiritual sword, which Wei Ying names SuiBian

Wei Ying and his family return to Yiling and Wei Ying decides to primarily work around town to earn some more stable income for his parents

Farm helper Wei Ying time, and he’s old enough to be alone at home while his parents go night hunting for long periods now

One day his parents return from a visit to the Jiang Sect, both worried, and they tell Wei Ying that the Cloud Recesses in Gusu has been attacked by the Wen Sect

They tell him to go stay with someone in Yiling while they go and look for the missing Lan Sect leaders who had escaped the attack

Wei Ying is scared for them, and has a bad feeling of something bad happening, but does as they ask

Weeks go by and Wei Ying hears nothing of his parents or the Jiangs, but during that time some Wen Sect members (led by Wen Qing) arrive and take over the Yiling Supervisory Office

Despite knowing that the Wen Sect was responsible for his worries, Wei Ying tries to approach them and find out what’s happening

He meets an upset Wen Ning on the way there, and despite recognizing the Wen robes he goes to comfort him

Wen Ning is upset about the upcoming indoctrination, but is unable to talk to anyone within the sects about it, so he’s relieved to be able to talk to Wei Ying

After this, however, Wei Ying is more worried than ever, but he has a good feeling about Wen Ning so he tells Wen Ning he’s going to head to Yunmeng to talk to the Jiang Sect about it

Wen Ning doesn’t oppose him, though he asks that Wei Ying not mention him

With that agreement in place, Wei Ying heads to Yunmeng alone

I’m mixing up the timeline quite a bit, not gonna lie, and don’t worry I’m not going to kill his parents I promise. Also there’s still gonna be wangxian it’s just even more of a slowburn than canon.

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #wei ying #wei wuxian #cangse sanren #wei changze #jiang cheng #jiang yanli #wen ning #jiang fengmian #yu ziyuan #mdzs au #i have no idea what to call this au #wangxian #mdzs fic ideas #my fic ideas #my posts #my ramblings

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qobiin · 4 years

Text

(he doesn’t exist now) survived by his son

pairings: lan wangji & lan sizhui, background wangxian

genre: angst, fluff | canon-compliant, post-wei wuxian’s death

warnings: grief/mourning, canon-typical mentions of violence, lwj’s punishment, the inherent agony of living without the other half of your soul

a/n #1: this is for eri, the one who got me to watch cql in the first place. happy birthday, i hope today is amazing! have 9k of dad!lwj as a treat <3 title is taken from steven universe’s “drift away” btw (:

words: 9398

summary: When Wei Wuxian falls, Lan Wangji does not throw himself after him.

part one of always come back to you

When Wei Wuxian falls, Lan Wangji does not throw himself after him.

He has no idea why at the time.

His heart and will are in shambles. His grip on Bichen’s sheath is hard enough to turn his knuckles white. His ribbon burns against his forehead. He is unsure that he is even breathing, all his air having left him when he screamed the moment Wei Wuxian pulled away.

Still, he remains standing, horror engulfing him whole. Sect Leader Jiang is standing beside him, just as frozen as he is but he does not dare look at his soulmate’s brother. His soulmate’s murderer because Wei Wuxian only pulled out of Lan Wangji’s grasp after Sect Leader Jiang’s sword struck the cliff face. Sect Leader Jiang may have pulled the blow Lan Wangji knew was aimed for their arms, but it does not change the fact that Wei Wuxian let go.

Something urges him to not follow after Wei Wuxian and he is uncertain of what it could be at first. It feels familiar, like a sensation Lan Wangji should recognize but cannot remember anymore. Almost like the notes of a song Lan Wangji memorized when he was first starting on the guqin but is unable to pinpoint where he learned it from.

(Later, he will think it felt too much like a warm hand on his chest pushing him away from the edge, pushing him away from the place his heart broke for good.

All he knows for certain is that he also died the moment Wei Wuxian took his last breath.)

He drifts - for lack of a better word - after that. Lan Wangji only recalls Brother pulling him away from the cliff, from Nightless City and the many eyes of the cultivators he just clashed swords with. He returns to Cloud Recesses with Brother and secludes himself in the Jingshi.

For the first night, Lan Wangji does not sleep. When he closes his eyes, all he sees is Wei Wuxian letting go again.

He is unsure of how much time passes but at some point Brother comes to him with the news that the Lanling Jin Sect are going to lead a siege on the Burial Mounds. Wei Wuxian’s corpse had not been recovered after the battle at Nightless City and Jin Guangshan is still vying for the Stygian Tiger Amulet so their logical next step is to invade the resentful land where Wei Wuxian had tried in vain to start a family all on his own.

Lan Wangji leaves on foot after curfew but that is the last thing on his mind as his body moves almost against his will. For a while, it feels as if he is wandering without a purpose.

Confusion, pain, and grief wrack his frame every second of the day but there is still a familiar sensation tugging him along. Pulling him in a direction that he is certain he should recognize but can’t.

It is not until the sun rises above the horizon that he realizes where exactly his body is trying to go.

Yiling.

Lan Wangji rides his sword the rest of the way there.

It is not as quiet as Lan Wangji expected it to be.

That bothers him. A graveyard should only be filled with the sounds of the living giving tribute, but there is only the dead around him. The dead are quiet. The Burial Mounds aren’t.

He walks anyway, ignoring the pain in his body. The familiar sensation is tugging him along again. Lan Wangji is too tired to wonder about where it may be leading him because he gave up control as soon as it had gripped onto him. It pulls and he follows. It would not have led him here without a purpose, he is certain of that at least.

In the cave Wei Wuxian used to call his home, there is nothing left of him except his notes, hand-made furniture that will no longer see any use, and a dirty red ribbon Lan Wangji falls to his knees at the sight of. He loses himself in grief for who knows how long but soon realizes that his gasping breaths are not the only ones echoing around him. He stands, ribbon tied around his wrist, and walks desperately in search of the source of those raspy breaths.

He stops in front of a broken, hollow tree trunk not far from the entrance of the cave. Something is lying in it, barely hidden from view. For a moment, Lan Wangji ponders whether he will be stumbling upon the corpse of someone he should know but can’t quite recall. He only visited the Burial Mounds once while his soulmate was still alive, after all, and he had never learned everyone’s names.

Lan Wangji glances inside and knows now why it is not as quiet as it should in the Burial Mounds. Lan Wangji suddenly understands why he did not follow Wei Wuxian in death.

Wen Yuan lives.

Wei Wuxian’s son lives.

Their son lives.

Lan Wangji does not wish to, but he turns his back on Wen Yuan’s prone form and returns to the cave.

Cultivators are gathering there, all of them from different sects.

There is no Jiang purple among them. Lan Wangji counts that as the blessing it is meant to be. He does not wish to hurt those his soulmate cared so much for.

It does not stop him from confronting the crowd by himself. Jin Guangyao appears, telling him his uncle has arrived but Lan Wangji is unafraid.

He knows what he stands for and it is not this. It is not this inane scramble for power the rest of the cultivation world is allowing to cloud their minds and judgment. It is standing between the power-hungry and the weak, unwilling to move aside and let this madness continue.

Lan Wangji is late in his decision, much too late to make things up to Wei Wuxian, but Wen Yuan is alive. A piece of his soulmate’s heart lives on and Lan Wangji is not going to allow harm to befall that little boy anymore.

So he fights those from his own sect, raising his sword to block blows from disciples of all ages. The Sect Elders themselves have shown up for the occasion but Lan Wangji cuts them down as well. He fights until there is no one to fight anymore, staggering and using Bichen as a crutch while cultivators lay around him on the ground in various stages of unconsciousness.

Uncle had only stayed long enough to command their sect in subduing him and bringing him back to Cloud Recesses for punishment. Lan Wangji does not wish to be punished, not when he now knows he is being righteous, but he walks back to the tree trunk hiding Wen Yuan and decides he will take them both back.

Wen Yuan needs medical attention, needs Lan Wangji’s protection from the rest of the world. Lan Wangji needs to keep him safe.

Wen Yuan is hot to the touch but he fits easily hidden under the folds of Lan Wangji’s robes. His head lies against his chest, his hair tickling Lan Wangji’s skin even through two layers of cloth.

It isn’t uncomfortable in the way that certain fabrics tend to be for him. Lace and silk are two of the few fabrics Lan Wangji can stand to have wrapped around him in six layers of robes without feeling like he is about to crawl out of his skin. Wen Yuan’s hair is neither of those but having it against him does not do anything more than cause his veins to break into song and make his heart feel like it is going to beat right out of his chest trying to follow the melody racing in his blood.

(It feels like Wei Wuxian’s hair against his neck, Wei Wuxian’s teasing grin directed at him in the face of his newest prank. Like Wei Wuxian laid across his lap in the darkness of a cave, delirious with fever, and asking Lan Wangji to play some music. Feels like Wei Wuxian meeting his gaze under the heavy downpour of rain, telling Lan Wangji that if he believes the rest of the cultivation world as right then Wei Wuxian will do everything their way instead and Lan Wangji being unable to say anything while he watches his soulmate lead the Wen remnants away.)

Lan Wangji’s eyes itch but he ignores his tears, his pain, his grief. He focuses on holding Wen Yuan securely in his embrace as he rides his sword back to Cloud Recesses, finding the strength to dredge up more spiritual power than he thought he originally had.

He remembers the little boy with a thin, dirty face who burst into tears after he settled his weight on Lan Wangji’s foot. After Wen Yuan gripped his ankle, and then looked up at him with a confused look in his almond-shaped eyes. After those villagers mistook him as Wen Yuan’s father and criticized him loudly enough to evoke shame within him since Lan Wangji had no idea what to do with a crying child suddenly invading his space. After Wei Wuxian swept in like a long-awaited dream and cleared the area of onlookers. After Wei Wuxian picked up the child and smiled up at Lan Wangji as if his heart was not doing its utmost best to beat right out of his chest and into the hands of the man he loved most.

After the boy smiled up at him and called him Rich-gege when he bought him as many toys as he wanted. After he paid for a large meal that fed both him and Wei Wuxian because their collarbones were prominent enough to tell Lan Wangji all he needed to know about their financial situation and just looking at them caused his breath to stutter in his chest. And after Wei Wuxian up and left again, taking the child and Lan Wangji’s weak heart with him, only leaving Lan Wangji himself bereft and more confused than he had ever felt before.

(“The child.” Lan Wangji remembers asking when Wei Wuxian first pulled the boy from Lan Wangji’s leg.

“He’s mine. I birthed him,” Wei Wuxian had said half-jokingly and half not at the same time.

It was obvious that the boy was Wei Wuxian’s in everything but blood. That made him Lan Wangji’s by extension. Wei Wuxian had been the one to proclaim them soulmates, more than brave enough to speak the words Lan Wangji had been holding back for years by then. Even if they would never marry or become partners in the manner that Lan Wangji desperately wished for, Wei Wuxian still looked upon him and saw Lan Wangji for who he really was.

When the time came for Wei Wuxian to have children, Lan Wangji would treat them well and spoil them in Wei Wuxian’s steed. Something he was more than able to do when he met Wen Yuan, Wei Wuxian’s son.

After all, any child of Wei Wuxian’s was also a child of Lan Wangji as well.)

When Lan Wangji first reached into the tree trunk and pulled him out, Wen Yuan’s face was still dirty, thinner than before, and flushed bright red. His little body was swathed in what Lan Wangji could only call rags and he shivered even as he sweated.

Wen Yuan still feels feverishly hot against Lan Wangji’s chest but he pushes down his panic and rides. He does not stop until he has reached the entrance of Cloud Recesses and walks briskly towards the closest healer he can find.

There he watches as Wen Yuan is washed up, dressed in a clean white robe, and given enough medicine to help ease him into a peaceful sleep. Lan Wangji’s arm pulses where his wound has reopened but his pain can wait, ensuring that the child is well and can be healed is more important. Only once Wen Yuan’s breathing has returned to normal does Lan Wangji seek out Uncle.

Fortunately, he finds Brother with their uncle in the Jingshi. They have been expecting him and finding them together makes this next part easier.

He sidesteps their questions of what he had been doing at the Burial Mounds and inhales deeply before he says, “I accept punishment. I brought a child. He is my son and innocent.”

Uncle looks like he is going to explode at the seams, fury and worry shadowing every plane of his face. Lan Wangji grips onto Bichen’s sheath, the familiar pattern and texture calming him.

It would be easy to claim the boy as his ward and adoptive son at best, but Lan Wangji needs to hide Wen Yuan’s origins or the last piece of his soulmate’s heart will be destroyed as violently as the rest of Wei Wuxian was. Lan Wangji will allow no harm to come to their son. If all that is required to keep Wen Yuan safe is the last of Lan Wangji’s credibility to be thrown away, then Lan Wangji is prepared to claim him as his bastard son.

“His name is Lan Yuan and he is ill. I will return to his bedside and await word of my punishment.” Lan Wangji bows to both men present and leaves as quickly as he appeared, not waiting to listen to whatever protests they may have.

Wen Yuan is still asleep when Lan Wangji returns and asleep still when Lan Wangji receives his punishment. Brother stays with Wen Yuan while the punishment is dealt out. Lan Wangji did not wish to leave his son alone but knowing that Brother is with him eases him.

Brother cannot interfere with his punishment after his initial attempts were drowned under the maliciousness of the Sect Elders and Uncle’s unmoving gaze. Brother would lose a lot more than just face within the Gusu Lan Sect if he denied Lan Wangji punishment altogether. As Sect Leader, Brother must be fair and unbiased, even when confronted with familial matters. Lan Wangji refuses to be the reason his brother loses all credibility in the cultivation world. Whatever others want to say or do to Lan Wangji is his business alone.

The pain of the whip is welcoming to him. Uncle appears furious throughout it all, but even through the haze, Lan Wangji knows it is not just him Uncle is angry with. Both the whip and Uncle’s disappointment are excruciating to bear and yet Lan Wangji does not find himself regretting his actions.

He knew what would happen at Nightless City when he decided he would protect Wei Wuxian despite how out of favor he was with the rest of the cultivation world. When he fought any cultivator that decided they wanted to harm Wei Wuxian. Lan Wangji thought Wei Wuxian was finally going to be safe. He believed himself capable of protecting what little remained of his soulmate’s efforts. Even after he failed in protecting Wei Wuxian, he found Wen Yuan and fought his own sect to keep this last speck of his soulmate’s presence safe. Despite the chaos, the grief, and the complete ruin of Wei Wuxian’s reputation, Lan Wangji knew whose side he would be on when push finally came to shove. He has known ever since he was first confronted with that mischievous smile at age fifteen.

He had hoped that Wei Wuxian was aware of this as well but now he will never know for certain.

When the punishment is over, Brother is summoned and between him and Uncle, Lan Wangji finds himself being dragged first to the Cold Springs then back to the Jingshi between them, their gaits and grips unsteady alike. They dress his wounds as best as they can and stay with him the entire first night. Lan Wangji lies face down on his bed, sleep evading him for a long, long time while Brother and Uncle sleep propped against his bed frame and table respectfully.

Lan Wangji withdraws from the eyes of the rest of the sect as he starts the slow healing process the healers are being forbidden from helping him with. His silence, which used to be something he took solace in, only grows as the days slowly tick by with Brother and Uncle by his side during the day. Only in the dark of night does he allow himself to hope in vain for a familiar, obnoxious voice to draw his attention away from the pain covering the expanse of his back and nestled deep within his heart.

Nothing comes except a heavy grief Lan Wangji is not prepared to handle.

Moments before Wen Yuan wakes four days later, Lan Xichen adds him to the clan registry and proclaims him as Lan Yuan, Lan Wangji’s son.

Lan Wangji is joyous even as his chest burns with the new Wen brand marring his skin and his mind struggles not to crumble under the guilt of what he revealed to his Brother the night before when he was intoxicated.

Lan Yuan doesn’t seem to notice either way as he begins to sob for his Xian-gege before his fever burns all his memories of a smiling man in black and red away.

Lan Yuan is a quiet child.

He is respectful, intelligent, and curious. He smiles more often than Lan Wangji does, but less often than Lan Wangji had expected. He does not remember anything from the time before he came to live at Cloud Recesses, only that he was hungry often and had met Lan Wangji once.

He studies diligently and accepts any praise or criticism his peers and teachers give to him. He becomes close friends with Lan Jingyi and develops a mischievous streak that none of the teachers could ever possibly trace back to Lan Yuan. Lan Wangji finds he isn’t concerned about this in the least. His son is still a child and children are allowed to have mindless fun now and again.

When Lan Yuan calls him Father for the first time, it is seven months after he has been brought to Cloud Recesses. Nevertheless, Lan Wangji feels that same sensation that led him to his son stroke the dying embers in his heart until a new flame of fierce parental love begins to burn within him. He holds his son close and cries freely. Lan Wangji is not ashamed of loving his son so severely that being called Father for the first time brings him to tears.

It is an honor to be Lan Yuan’s father.

Despite that, whispered rumors begin to reach his ears in seclusion.

At the next Discussion Conference that just so happens to be held by the Gusu Lan Sect, Lan Wangji comes out of seclusion briefly. Brother helps prop him up at various tables and leads him from event to event with the ever-present eyes of the cultivation world trailing after them. It is incredibly painful to do even this much, but Lan Wangji perseveres. He is the same stoic and cold Hanguang-Jun that he has always been but that does not seem to stop Sect Leader Jiang from glaring at him.

He says nothing to Lan Wangji, but when a fussy Jin Rulan is handed to him as they are overseeing the archery competition, Sect Leader Jiang’s glare increases in intensity. It only becomes worse when the caretaker in charge of Lan Yuan for the day appears by Lan Wangji’s side with his teary son close behind her. She quickly explains that Lan Yuan would not stop crying for him and, not knowing what to do, brought him there in the hopes that Lan Wangji would be able to calm him down. Lan Wangji gives her his thanks and nods his head as she excuses herself, holding Lan Yuan close as the boy quiets. He falls asleep not long after that in Lan Wangji’s lap, tired now that he has finished crying himself out.

Lan Wangji ignores all the eyes trained on him and merely brushes his son’s hair back absentmindedly as he looks to the archers once more. Sect Leader Jiang scoffs not far from him and Lan Wangji spares him a glance to see the annoyance and rage clear as day on his face before ignoring him for the rest of the Discussion Conference.

What Lan Wangji knows from that moment onwards is that no one would have the gall to openly say what they mean when he is near, yet still, he listens closely when he can.

They speak of Lan Yuan’s already apparent beauty and intelligence. They speak of his polite manners and soft-spoken words. They speak of how quickly he developed his golden core and how unsurprising this news was considering who his father is. They speak of his parentage and wonder who his mother could be and how beautiful she must have been to have such an attractive child with Hanguang-jun.

(They always wonder why Lan Wangji never married Lan Yuan’s other parent back when they were still alive.)

No one ever learns of Lan Yuan’s true origins in any case so Lan Wangji allows the rumors and speculations. He does, however, make a point of asking Brother to hand out mild punishments to those who have not learned how to keep their heads and voices low when he is home.

After all, gossiping is not permitted in Cloud Recesses.

A year after Lan Yuan’s arrival in Cloud Recesses, Brother becomes his Uncle.

“A-Yuan, if you continue to practice diligently with the guqin, perhaps we can acquire one for your own personal use?” Brother asks in a somewhat offhand manner that tells Lan Wangji enough of the plans his brother already has in mind for Lan Yuan’s future guqin.

Lan Yuan has been learning how to play using Wangji under the tutelage of Lan Qiren, Lan Xichen, and Lan Wangji. Many of the caretakers that watch over the younger children during the day praise him and mention his talent in passing with their Sect Leader seeing as Lan Yuan’s father is still in seclusion. Lan Wangji doesn’t mind hearing this from his brother. He is rather relieved to not have to think about the rest of the Gusu Lan Sect at the moment.

Teaching his son music and healing slowly is enough.

Raising his hands from the strings, the last notes still hanging in the air, Lan Yuan nods and smiles amiably up at Brother in response to his question.

“Yes, Uncle,” he chimes, his young, bright voice giving nothing away.

Lan Wangji politely averts his gaze when Brother begins to cry but offers him a handkerchief and presses his arm against his, silently showing him support as he has always done since they were children. He wants to do more but he is still healing and does not know how to go about it properly so he decides that this will have to be enough instead.

Lan Yuan simply stares between them, his smile falling under the weight of his confusion until his lips curve upwards again and he asks if they can go visit the rabbits.

Brother takes him every day for two and a half weeks after that.

Two years after Lan Wangji brings his son home, Lan Yuan calls Uncle his Grandfather because that is what he is and always will be.

Maybe Uncle has never been Lan Wangji’s father by blood or name, but Lan Wangji has been under the impression for a very long time that no one has to say what is already known. Lan Qiren is not the parent his nephews needed as children, but he is the parent they had and he always did his best by them. Though strict and stubborn, he taught and raised them to the best of his abilities.

Uncle oversaw his punishment but Uncle was also the one to stamp out any complaints the Sect Elders had about Lan Wangji claiming a bastard son. Uncle was the one who ordered their sect to contain Lan Wangji and Uncle was the one who demanded alongside the Sect Elders that he be punished. Uncle dressed his wounds and changed his bandages afterward, held Lan Wangji up and helped him go where he needed to go as he healed. And Uncle was the first one to arrange Lan Yuan’s fingers over the strings of a guqin.

Most would consider Uncle cruel for less than half of the things he has done to Lan Wangji in particular and Lan Wangji does, in a sense, think the same. However, Lan Wangji still considers Uncle as the father he was never allowed to meet.

Parents are not perfect and Lan Qiren is no exception to this rule, no matter how hard he tried to emulate it for himself and for Lan Wangji and his brother when they were children. Lan Wangji knows this to be true after two years of fatherhood himself.

In the beginning, Uncle did not approve of Lan Wangji’s sudden fatherhood and knew without a doubt that Lan Yuan was not biologically his. He shared this knowledge with no one though, not even Lan Yuan himself. Lan Wangji does not know if he has truly forgiven Uncle but he does know he need not worry himself about Uncle’s behavior around Lan Yuan. After all, Lan Wangji can very well see how his son softens his uncle’s heart with the mere appearance of his smile and quiet laugh.

By blood or not, Lan Yuan is Uncle’s grandson just as Lan Wangji and Brother are Uncle’s sons.

So when Lan Yuan says, “Yes, Grandfather,” Lan Wangji is not surprised.

Uncle sniffs in mock disdain, still caught up in the apparent scolding he was giving before about Lan Yuan climbing into Lan Wangji’s lap. After a moment, he realizes what Lan Yuan has said and immediately, his eyes water. Uncle cups Lan Yuan’s face gently, smiling in such a way that Lan Wangji thought was lost.

He remembers that the last time he saw that smile, he was still the child that crawled into his older brother’s bed at night to sleep comfortably beside someone who would never leave him as their mother had left them. Now he is a man with a son and scars on his body, heart, and soul for the love he lost.

It is good to see Uncle smile again.

“Stop worrying your Grandfather so much, A-Yuan. Be a good boy for your Father, Uncle, and I,” Uncle tells Lan Wangji’s son.

Lan Yuan hums and nods, smiling a grin that always knocks the breath out of Lan Wangji’s lungs when he catches a glimpse of it. Both Brother and Uncle see it but only Brother looks to Lan Wangji in sympathy as he reaches out to grasp his shoulder briefly before letting go again.

Despite the near-constant ache in his heart and soul, Lan Wangji is glad to know that those who matter are also able to see Lan Yuan’s other father in him as well.

And if later Lan Wangji realizes Lan Yuan pulled the Grandfather card simply to distract Uncle from continuing his lecture, he holds that knowledge close to his chest. Lan Yuan is his father’s son after all.

Both of them.

When the third anniversary of Lan Yuan’s appearance in Cloud Recesses is approaching, the Sect Elders pull Lan Wangji into a meeting where they ask for permission to raise Lan Yuan for him instead so he can become a “proper” Sect Heir.

Lan Wangji says no and storms out of the meeting he recognizes as another form of punishment from the Sect Elders without listening to whatever other nonsense they want to ply him with.

They do not take the hint.

What ensues is a month-long battle of wills that leaves Lan Wangji angrier and more smug each time the Sect Elders attempt to speak with him. They argue that Lan Wangji is still healing and need not concern himself with child-rearing on top of his injuries. Lan Wangji levels them with a flat look, pointedly not mentioning who gave Lan Wangji his injuries, to begin with. Brother claims their concerns are unnecessary and rather late considering how long Lan Yuan has been with Lan Wangji at Cloud Recesses already and how Lan Wangji’s injuries are mostly healed by now anyway. The Sect Elders step around their Sect Leader’s arguments with condescending ease, however, something that Lan Wangji detests to his very core.

They also claim that his grief is affecting Lan Yuan’s development. That his son could flourish under their care with no sadness for a mother he will never meet shadowing him at all hours of the day. Lan Wangji’s brows twitch at their implications, silently daring anyone to say what they actually mean before he refuses once again and strides away. Only Brother stays behind to offer the niceties Lan Wangji is certain none of the Sect Elders rightfully deserve anymore.

It does nothing to stop them from calling Lan Yuan nothing but a bastard child that could ruin their sect if he continues to remain under Lan Wangji’s care the next day. A child born out of wedlock that Lan Wangji was too ashamed to claim until he had no other choice. An unwanted child whose only redeemable qualities are the strength of his golden core, his already apparent cold beauty, and the sharp intelligence he must have inherited from Lan Wangji instead of his beggar of a mother.

Lan Wangji nearly draws Bichen, his fury so great that he regrets not hurting more of the Sect Elders, not standing by Wei Wuxian’s side, and following him until the bitter end so he would not have to deal with any of this when he had the chance.

But then he thinks of Lan Yuan, of his bright smile, and his twinkling eyes. Thinks of what would have happened to his son if Lan Wangji had not found him and pushes down the incessant ache to be with his soulmate deep down under again.

By the time Lan Wangji has released the hold he has on the hilt of his sword, Brother stands defiantly in the middle of the hall with a vivid look of disgust on his face. He loudly and firmly proclaims that as Sect Leader, they have no authority to overrule his decision of allowing Lan Yuan to remain with his father. Familial matters such as these fall under his domain, even when concerning the Sect Heir as written in their principles. That they have broken many of the rules they adhere so much to in their persistence to remove Lan Yuan from his family. That they have disgraced both the Clan and the Gusu Lan Sect as a whole.

Whatever Brother says after that, Lan Wangji does not know because he leaves as soon as his brother has begun to speak and goes in search of his son. He finds Lan Yuan with the rabbits, burying Lan Jingyi under their fur in the same way that Lan Wangji often does to him when they come by themselves. Uncle is standing nearby, watching the children play and trying not to show his displeasure over the mere presence of the animals since they remain here in the back slopes of Cloud Recesses due to nothing but a technicality.

Lan Wangji’s stride does not falter as he approaches his son and picks him up in his arms, holding him carefully to his chest. He buries his face in Lan Yuan’s hair to ignore the questions Uncle throws at him and the startled yelp Lan Jingyi makes once he notices Lan Wangji’s presence. He focuses on his breathing as the cloud ornament adorning Lan Yuan's forehead ribbon presses into the curve of his neck and his son's soft, natural scent of ash and snow invades his senses slowly.

He stands there for however long, holding his son tight and breathing him in as he wills himself to calm. He reassures himself that A-Yuan will not be going anywhere he doesn’t want to go and slowly comes back to himself. Lan Yuan, for his part, clutches the front of Lan Wangji’s robes and grips onto his father just as tightly without asking any questions.

They do not part from one another for the rest of the night. If Lan Yuan is not in his father's lap, then he is sitting close enough for Lan Wangji to keep a firm hand on his son no matter what they may be doing. During dinner, Lan Wangji takes their food in the Jingshi instead of the dining hall and plops Lan Yuan firmly in his lap as they eat quickly and quietly.

Lan Yuan does not complain once that entire night, only speaking to ask for things like a hug, his favorite lullaby, and Lan Wangji's fingers running through his hair. Lan Wangji sings to his son as he bathes him, firmly instructing Lan Yuan to change into his sleeping robes while he bathes quickly himself. Lan Yuan is sitting on the edge of Lan Wangji's bed when he returns, dressed in his sleeping robes and kicking his feet as he holds out a comb then turning around silently after Lan Wangji has taken it.

By the time nine rolls around, Lan Wangji has successfully braided his son's hair and brushed through his own before he lies them down to sleep. Lan Yuan usually sleeps in the daybed but for tonight, Lan Wangji holds him close to his chest and hums his lullaby to him again even as they both slip into the comfort of their dreams.

The day after, Lan Wangji remains within arm's distance of his son, secluding them in the Jingshi for the day. The itchy desperation he felt the day before has not completely made its way through his system but Lan Wangji is certain it will release its hold on him soon enough. Lan Yuan doesn't complain, even though he does stare at his father in wordless observation while looking much too serious for his young face that Lan Wangji anxiously reassures himself he is not turning his son into a copy of himself.

His son's smile is like the sun breaking through the last of the reluctant clouds that follow after a storm, his laugh so content that Lan Wangji feels inexplicably warm whenever he happens to hear it. Lan Yuan is happy. His son is by his side, safe and sound. The Sect Elders cannot take Lan Yuan from him. Brother and Uncle would never allow it and it is Brother's decision whether Lan Yuan continues to stay with him or not.

For the most part, Lan Wangji is certain that he has won this round with the Sect Elders until almost a month later when Lan Yuan asks to move out of the Jingshi and into the junior disciple dorms instead.

Lan Wangji hides his sadness as best as he can and allows his son to join the other disciples for the beginning of his more serious training, a multitude of feelings he cannot quite sparse through circling within him. Education is important. His son loves learning, he excels in all of his studies and he is happy. Lan Yuan is not leaving him. Lan Yuan is going to continue with his studies, strengthen his golden core, and grow up with Lan Jingyi by his side. Lan Jingyi would never allow Lan Yuan to be harmed. They are very close friends and Lan Wangji is glad that his son has someone who he can share whatever troubles he will not bring to Lan Wangji himself.

This is good. This is what is healthy for his son's development. Even if it hurts him, this is necessary for Lan Yuan to continue being happy as he grows up.

So Lan Wangji helps his son pack up a few of the belongings he wants to take with him, reassuring him that anything he leaves behind will be kept safe for him. That Lan Yuan can return to the Jingshi whenever he needs to. He escorts his son personally to the dorms, stopping at the door to kneel and pull his son in close for another hug.

Physical contact is still an issue for Lan Wangji but he made an effort for his son. Lan Yuan needed physical comfort when he first came to Cloud Recesses considering the fact that he was still recovering from his fever and malnutrition. Lan Wangji pushed his boundaries so he could hold his son close and rock him through his nightmares, imaging just how much better Wei Wuxian might have been at all of this until that hurt too much to think about. Now Lan Wangji has gotten so used to holding his son close that he tends to crave the simple intimacy of Lan Yuan’s small form curled against his chest more often than not.

Lan Yuan pulls back enough to kiss his forehead ribbon before he steps out of the embrace entirely. "I love you, Father."

Despite his mixed emotions, Lan Wangji smiles back at his son as well as he can manage to and leans forward to kiss his forehead ribbon in return. "I love you, A-Yuan."

After that, Lan Wangji spends most of his free time with Lan Yuan by burying his son under the soft fur of rabbits that Lan Yuan’s first father gifted to him as a teenager.

He cannot guess whether Lan Yuan now remembers the man in black and red that he used to call Xian-gege, but oftentimes Lan Wangji will see Wei Wuxian in the curve of Lan Yuan’s smile, in the sound of his laughter, in the steady grip of his sword. In the softness of his hair, the pout he rarely ever allows to grace his face when he is concentrating, the warmth in his eyes when he meets Lan Wangji’s gaze.

His grief has never left him and neither has his love for Lan Yuan’s first father but he hopes that he is doing well enough being Lan Yuan’s second father. He hopes that if Wei Wuxian were to ever come looking for his son, he would be proud of Lan Wangji for taking such good care of him and raising him as well as he ever could.

Lan Wangji had never originally planned to have children and he became certain of its improbability when he met Wei Wuxian. But then A-Yuan came into his life and the rest was decided from that point on.

It surprises no one when Lan Yuan’s courtesy name becomes Lan Sizhui.

Lan Wangji wonders if that says more about him than he has ever wanted to publicly share. After a brief stint of contemplation, he decides he does not care. He isn’t ashamed. He knows the Sect Elders are still looking for any excuse they can reasonably use to take Lan Wangji's parental rights over his son away from him. He also knows that others speak of how he behaves and looks as if he has lost a wife, how painful it must have been to lose Lan Sizhui’s mother so soon, how only his son has the power to draw him out of his heavy grief. They are wrong, of course, but they are also not.

Lan Wangji lost his soulmate, not a wife or his son’s mother.

At some point though, he ponders over what kind of impact his grief is having on Lan Sizhui.

“Do you want a mother, A-Yuan?” Lan Wangji asks one summer afternoon when Lan Sizhui is almost nine and they have just finished their noon meal in the Jingshi.

Lan Sizhui is of the mind that he is much too big to be called A-Yuan anymore but he allows Lan Wangji to call him that when they are alone. Lan Wangji uses it any time he can get away with it because his son’s first father would have and that is enough reason for him.

Lan Sizhui blinks up at him, confused. “I have a mother?”

“Yes,” Lan Wangji says because it is technically true, but then thinks better of it. “No, but you can if you want one.”

After all, Lan Wangji would set aside his vow of never marrying if it meant his son could know a mother’s love. He has never been interested in women before, especially not after he met Wei Wuxian, but he would marry one to give Lan Sizhui a mother.

He will always do whatever he has to for his son, even when it is difficult for him - especially when it is difficult for him. There are very few things Lan Wangji will not do for his son and marrying out of obligation isn't one of them.

“No. I have Father, I do not need a mother,” Lan Sizhui finally replies.

Lan Wangji smiles and reaches out to pat his son’s head, his veins burning with the force of his love and adoration when Lan Sizhui smiles back up at him. “A-Yuan is a good boy.”

Lan Sizhui leans into his touch, his smile growing until Lan Wangji feels like he is looking at a mirror image of his son’s first father in the brightness of his grin.

Lan Sizhui is eleven when he learns Inquiry on the guqin.

Lan Wangji listens to him play, correcting him when he strikes a wrong chord and does not allow his son to imbue any of the notes with spiritual power. He has played Inquiry a handful of times himself these past few years. No one has ever answered him before when he did.

Or to be simply put, Wei Wuxian has never answered him before.

Maybe Lan Sizhui honestly does not recall his Xian-gege anymore, but Lan Wangji isn't sure what he would do if Wei Wuxian were to ignore their son's questions as easily as he has ignored Lan Wangji's desperate and heartbroken ones.

No, simply playing the notes together like this is enough.

Some three years after that, Lan Wangji returns to the Jingshi after feeding the rabbits to find Lan Sizhui waiting for him on the steps.

Earlier that morning he had returned from another night hunt, his report already in Brother's hands by this point. He brought back a gift for Lan Sizhui, a new writing set since his current one was beginning to look worn and Lan Jingyi had told him that Lan Sizhui had mentioned wanting a new one. Lan Wangji had wanted to see his son immediately after arriving but Lan Sizhui was in the middle of his morning meditation at the time and would then have his lectures and sword training lessons to attend afterward. He was content with waiting until his son was free to give him his gift and kiss his forehead ribbon before returning to their regular schedules.

But as Lan Wangji approaches, he wishes he had gone to see his son earlier after all.

It takes him a moment to realize that Lan Sizhui is crying and has probably been crying for a while now if his swollen eyelids are anything to go by. The sight of this evidence alone is enough for anger to spark within Lan Wangji.

No one hurts his son.

"What happened." Lan Wangji demands, his voice searingly cold even as he tries in vain to keep it gentle for his son.

Lan Sizhui wipes the back of his hand under his eyes and stares down at his feet as he murmurs, "Hanguang-Jun."

Immediately, Lan Wangji freezes. Lan Sizhui calls him Father when they are alone or with family. He has never referred to Lan Wangji as Hanguang-Jun in private like this. His son has made it clear on multiple occasions that he heavily dislikes not being allowed to call him Father in public anymore. From time to time, he will slip up and then punish himself for it even though Lan Wangji would never try to enforce a punishment for Lan Sizhui calling him exactly what he is: his father.

Something must be terribly wrong.

"What happened." Lan Wangji repeats, even less gentle this time.

His son winces at his tone but continues to keep his gaze on his feet. Lan Wangji sighs under his breath and reaches down to pick up Lan Sizhui like he used to when he was much smaller. His son is substantially bigger at fourteen than he was as a toddler, but Lan Wangji barely acknowledges his weight while he stands back up. Lan Sizhui goes still in his embrace and remains stiff even when Lan Wangji walks into the Jingshi proper and sets his son down on the daybed he never got rid of after Lan Sizhui moved into the junior disciple dorms.

Lan Sizhui still has not met his gaze. Lan Wangji feels a terrible sensation grip his heart as his son stares dejectedly at the floor in a clear and complete silence that is too defined for Lan Wangji's taste.

"Tea?" Lan Wangji asks properly this time.

A tense moment passes before Lan Sizhui shakes his head.

"A-Yuan," Lan Wangji begins, pausing when Lan Sizhui winces. "Tell me what is wrong. Why are you crying?"

"I heard that you had returned this morning," Lan Sizhui says and it becomes Lan Wangji's turn to wince. His voice is hoarse, his pain undeniable. It hurts Lan Wangji something awful just listening to his son speak. "I was talking to Lan Jingyi about when I should come to see you and-"

Lan Wangji kneels in front of his son, his hands immediately finding Lan Sizhui's. "What happened, A-Yuan?"

Lan Sizhui winces again but attempts to speak anyway. "One of the Sect Elders... He said..."

Even though it feels as if a sword has run clear through him, Lan Wangji waits patiently for his son to continue. He has never been very patient, not exactly, but he learned how to be for Lan Sizhui. He learned a lot for the sake of his son.

"I think he thought we couldn't hear him, but he said... I-" Lan Sizhui tries again, cutting himself off with a hiccup.

Lan Wangji unfurls his son's clenched hands in his lap and looks directly into his face, relieved when Lan Sizhui finally meets his gaze. "A-Yuan."

Tears well up in the corners of his son's eyes, silently making their way down his face. The sight alone makes Lan Wangji lean in closer, holding his son's hands tight. Lan Sizhui's lips wobble, his expression on the verge of crumbling.

"You're not my father, are you?" Lan Sizhui asks, his voice as broken as Lan Wangji's heart feels.

Lan Wangji does not lie. He is incapable of lying directly. He can avoid and sidestep a question artfully, but he has never spoken an untruth. If people misunderstand his answers, that is through every fault of their own for not listening to the meaning behind his words.

"I am," Lan Wangji says simply.

If anything, this seems to make Lan Sizhui's tears increase in frequency. "No. You know what I mean. Please, tell me the truth."

Doesn't his son understand that Lan Wangji has already?

"I am your father," Lan Wangji repeats. "I am your father in everything but blood. You are my son. You are the boy I raised and love as my own because you are my own."

Lan Wangji is not good at speaking. Wei Wuxian was the one who rambled on and squeezed as many words as he could into a conversation. Wei Wuxian spoke as if he was running out of time and needed to say everything he had to say before his time was up. Lan Wangji still to this day does not know if Wei Wuxian somehow knew that he would die young, but regardless, Lan Wangji does his best to channel both what he means and what he says as he continues. Even if words are not one of his strengths, that won’t stop him from explaining everything to his son.

"Your birth parents had been dead for some time when I found you, but you were already mine, A-Yuan. I have never met either of them and yet I thank them both every day for bringing you into the world. You are not my son by blood, but you are my son in heart, soul, and everything else that truly matters. You are the shining light within your grandfather's eye and the warmth in your uncle's heart. And you are the single most important person in your father's life, A-Yuan," Lan Wangji confesses, feeling a weight he was previously unaware of lift from his shoulders as he speaks. "I love you, A-Yuan. I have always loved you. Your origins have never once conflicted with my love for you. You are my son and I will always be your father."

Lan Sizhui tips into his embrace as soon as he has finished speaking and sobs into his chest, no doubt rubbing tears and snot alike into Lan Wangji's robes. Lan Wangji doesn't mind. He kisses Lan Sizhui’s forehead ribbon and rocks him gently in his arms.

(Later, Brother will come into the Jingshi without knocking and will drop kisses across Lan Sizhui’s face. He will avoid Lan Sizhui’s forehead ribbon because only Lan Wangji has the right to touch it but Brother will silently and loudly reassure his son that he is the best nephew in the world and he loves him without fault as well. Lan Wangji will look upon this and smile in that way he only ever does with those he loves and kiss Lan Sizhui’s forehead again before Uncle sweeps into the Jingshi and joins their huddled forms right there on the floor.

But this will come later.)

For now, Lan Wangji simply holds his son close for as long as is needed and then some.

Lan Sizhui is almost sixteen when Brother orders Lan Wangji to take the junior disciples with him on his night hunt.

It is not the junior disciples’ first night hunt by far but it is their first night hunt with Hanguang-Jun. It is also Lan Wangji’s first night hunt with his son.

The night hunt is very simple. Some low-level corpses have been appearing in the woods around a small farming village not very far away from Caiyi Town. The corpses have been dragging unsuspecting villagers into the woods never to be seen again. A night hunt such as this should be relatively educating and safe enough to expose the junior disciples to.

Lan Wangji can understand why Brother wanted the disciples to accompany him, but it does nothing to dissuade the vague fear he holds for Lan Sizhui somehow being harmed.

He leads the way to the village on his sword, standing tall and stiff. Lan Sizhui is behind him to his right, Lan Jingyi mirroring his position on Lan Wangji’s left. The other juniors fan out behind them, expressions varying from excitement to deep concentration. Lan Sizhui appears calm, the corners of his mouth barely lifted upwards as they ride. Lan Jingyi is all smiles and laughter, joking around with Lan Sizhui and the other disciples alike.

(In a way, Lan Jingyi reminds Lan Wangji greatly of Wei Wuxian but now is not the time to focus on that.)

They arrive in the village quickly and discuss the situation with many of the villagers teeming about in what constitutes as their marketplace. Lan Wangji watches as Lan Sizhui suggests they make camp seeing as the village has no inn and none of the disciples object.

Cultivators from the Gusu Lan Sect are considered to be well-mannered and too overly polite to whine and complain as any other cultivator would. However, these are junior disciples and Lan Wangji knows how too often the young tend to forget themselves.

After all, Lan Wangji forgot himself and his place often enough once he met Wei Wuxian.

Still, the lack of protest surprises him but he does not allow it to show on his face. He quietly observes as Lan Sizhui and Lan Jingyi divide up the tasks between the disciples present and quickly have camp set up not too far into the woods where the villagers claim the corpses frequently emerge from.

By the end of the night, Lan Wangji is pleased to see his son and his son’s closest friend take charge and act as joint leaders while they successfully subdue the corpses.

It seems Lan Wangji has much to disclose in his report when they return to Cloud Recesses.

Lan Wangji fixes his son’s forehead ribbon and leans down to press a kiss on it.

“Remember to not wander,” Lan Wangji says as he pulls back.

Lan Sizhui’s face is flushed pink with mild embarrassment, less round than it was as a child but he is nineteen now and his smile is easy, remaining the same as it ever has been. “Yes, Father.”

The other juniors are watching, probably planning to poke fun at Lan Sizhui later when the revered Hanguang-jun is out of earshot. Lan Wangji isn’t worried about this, he knows that none of the juniors do this to hurt his son. If they did, Lan Jingyi would have done something about it already or come to Lan Wangji himself if he could not.

(No one would dare harm Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian’s son anyway for fear of torture, death, and then possession. Lan Wangji could not protect Lan Sizhui’s first father, but he will not fail in protecting their son.)

Everyone knows Lan Wangji loves his son more than life itself. There is no shame in showing what is already a proven fact. There is no rule against speaking truths when others are not present.

So he allows the corners of his mouth to hint at lifting upwards before his expression returns to blank calm. “I will be nearby. Use the flares only for emergencies.”

“Yes, Father,” Lan Sizhui repeats.

Lan Wangji holds his hand out and Lan Sizhui drops his qiankun pouch wordlessly into it. Another moment passes as Lan Wangji looks through the pouch and assures himself that his son will have everything he needs for the first night hunt he will lead without a senior disciple accompanying them. He nods in approval once he is done and returns the qiankun pouch to his son, patting Lan Sizhui’s head once.

“I await your report,” Lan Wangji murmurs before he steps back so his son may rejoin the other juniors behind him.

“Thank you, Father,” Lan Sizhui says with a bow, smiling as he straightens and walks until he is alongside Lan Jingyi.

When they first left Cloud Recesses that morning, Lan Wangji felt anxious for some reason. No matter what set of robes he put on or how hard he held Bichen’s sheath, he could not resolve the shaky feeling in his chest that gripped his heart painfully when he thought of Lan Sizhui. He had packed quickly once something tried to push him towards the door, relief fluttering through him when that same sensation led him straight to Cloud Recesses’ entrance where the juniors were readying to depart.

During the sword ride here, that feeling would not allow him to keep his gaze away from Lan Sizhui for too long. His son was flying calmly by his side, expression serene as the sun began to rise and they passed towns and forests alike under them. He was bright, filled with the gentle happiness of his life and quiet excitement to be in charge of a night hunt for the very first time. If Lan Wangji happened to glance at him from the corner of his eye, he could have sworn that he was seeing Lan Sizhui’s first father in his place instead.

Now they are here, on the edges of Mo Village, and Lan Wangji feels calm. Calmer than he has felt in a long time. Lan Sizhui looks back at him once, smiling and waving before the disciples round the bend in the path.

Lan Wangji watches them disappear from sight, feeling an all-too-familiar sensation caress his cheek gently before it leaves him be for the very last time.

Deep within Mo Village, someone wakes up in a shed.

a/n #2: thanks for reading! i have more mdzs content in the works, but in the meantime, feel free to send requests or headcanons to my inbox!

#dad lan wangji #dad!lan wangji #dad lwj #dad!lwj #wangxian #lan wangji #lan sizhui #mdzs #cql #the untamed #series #f:mdzs #g:angst #g:fluff #t:oneshot #p:lan wangji&wen yuan #p:lan wangji/wei wuxian #s:acbty #m: fic

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wangxianficfinder · 2 years

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Fics Still Missing part 2

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These fics are still missing!

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1. hey for the next fic finder could u find a fic where post canon wei ying and the juniors are on a night hunt and wei ying plays this horrifying melody and lan sizhui falls asleep cause that used to be his lullaby while the other juniors are all creeped out? #9 of post

FOUND? is referring to a scene in chapter 2 of tell some storm by qurbat (G, 31k, wangxian, JC & WWX, LSZ & WWX, NHS & WWX, Post-Canon, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, liberal amounts of outsider POV, the legend of wangxian, how to create a romance epic for dummies)

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2. Um excuse me but can you help me find an air of wangxian in modern au I read it when I first got into it but I can’t find it anywhere so I hope you can help me it’s about lan zhan being either a Mafia boss or something like that while wei ying is a detective/police officer I think I remember wei ying getting drunk at a bar than being taken by lan zhan than they did papapa other than that lan zhan took him to his limo after the bar scene while the end is when wei ying leaves to go only to find out he did the papapa with the dangerous lan zhan that’s all I can remember but I am hoping you know what name it is also can you find any male pregnant wei ying when wei ying and lan zhan lives at gusu. #13 of post

#13 sounds so familiar and it might even be a twitter threadfic but i cant remember which ToT; anon would u happen to remember where you’ve read it?

FOUND? 🧡 Rule Number One: Never get attached. by KizuKatana (E, 130k, WangXian, Modern AU, A/B/O, Light Angst, Crime Boss LWJ, Rogue criminal genius WWX)

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3. I was wondering if you knew a post-canon fic where there’s a scene in which JC, WWX, LWJ, maybe LXC and the juniors(?) All end up in the forest during a night hunt(?) And are forced to relive the Nightless City massacre and see Jiang Yanli die. And not sure if it’s the same post-canon fic but one where the Elders of some sect (I think it’s the Moling Su?) accuse the Jin(?) Sect of something during a discussion conference and Nie Huaisang helps out. Mikkeneko asks: For #9 - is this the same fic where Jiang Yanli gets brought back to life following revisiting the massacre? #9 of post

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4. Heyo Mod L and Mod C. Looking for a fic where i only remember one weird fact. WWX can only drink alcohol and eat meat? Not sure about the meat part but I remember it’s on CR and WWX need alcohol to sustain? Please help me. It feels like something i made up!(ᗒᗣᗕ)՞ #11 of post

Hi! Fic finder #11 here. It’s not the tiger verse series. I think WWX is a demon? Another titbit I remembered is i think WWX almost collapsed before they found out. JC is a good brother here! Thank you trying!! I’m kinda losing my mind over this. I even went thur the demon WWX tag but i dunno it’s deleted or i just couldn’t find it

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5. I have a fic finder request if you don’t mind :) The scene I remember is just after the Sunshot campaign and the Jin (I think?) have been holding Wen cultivator prisoners during their trials. WWX meets with a Wen prisoner scheduled to be executed who has agreed to give WWX his golden core and it turns out the Wen is A-Yuan’s birth father. I remember that the transplant does occur and the man is executed and WWX and LWJ still end up AY’s parents. Ring any bells? Thanks! #20 of post

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6. hi! ummm I´m looking for an omega verse fanfic I last saw on ao3 I think. Where Wei Ying´s ghost protects Lan Zhan from his punishment(lashes) and Lan Zhan gets expelled from the clan and goes to live in the burial mounds with A-Yuan, and i think Wei Ying is a Yiling local god or something #5 of post

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7. I’m not sure if I’m doing this right(apologies if it isn’t) but I’m looking for a fic where wei ying ends up in ghost city and ended up being adopted by hualian as their little brother. Wei ying also becomes a calamity with a title of something knowing dreams. He later on timetravels back to gusu study days where only wangxian is aware that they have timetraveled. Theres also a scene where wei ying basically corrects lan qiran during class and ends up teaching the class for a bit before getting kicked out. #17 of post

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8. Hi! I’m trying to find a fic where Lan Xichen lives with Wangxian and A-Yuan post JGY events. Because he’s like uber depressed and doesn’t want to live alone. It was a modern AU, but tbh I’d love anything with a similar premise. Thanks for all your work! #4 of post

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9. Hello. For your new fic finder, honestly at this point I’m convinced I’ve dreamed it or merged two fics together idek. It begins with wwx being hunted down by ppl (this is post canon so after all the sieges and in mxy body) and he is trying to wait for lz but dies anyway (similar to Third Times A Charm by Kyerian and Lily but not it) and then wwx time travels back to his lotus pier time before the lectures at cloud recesses. This is where it gets foggy for me. I remember him being really good at the sword and inventions but that is pretty canon. I think jc wasn’t upset bc wwx was SO advanced he was basically at the end of what ymj could teach him? Idk not too sure. Foggy as I said. But bc he was so good I guess he was idle and more troublemaking than usual (?) so Yu furen ended up putting him in lessons with jyl and he learned to embroider, make clothes, paint, manage a house, how to please your man (lol), etc. Jc joined them at some point cause he was jealous wwx and jyl were spending so much time together but quickly left bc he was blushing ashamed idk. I think after either jyl or wwx stopped their lessons but one continued on (leaning towards wwx cause I feel like I remember yzy being passive aggresively kind about it?). Also nhs, jc and wwx were friends pre gusu lectures. Nhs really liked wwx cause he painted fans with him. Also I think when they were getting ready to go to gusu wwx decided to make robes for himself. Nhs was shocked and jc explained how he knew how to do it trying to make fun of wwx which failed. In the end nhs was all heart eyes cause he loved fashion. This is all I remember. As I said I’ve been trying nearly a freaking year to find this fic. Idk if it is deleted, I dreamt it or what but please help me. When I read it it was incomplete, not a lot of chapters, idk if it is in hiatus, abandoned or if it was completed. Please help me. #12 of post

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10. hii!! I heard there’s new mod, welcome mod c! (Hi ^^ ~ Mod C) hope am not bothering you mods too much. so, do you know i u have encountered a fic were wangxian was childhood friends playing to be boyfriends but they weren’t actually one. (idk if it fits fake/pretend relationship tag, didn’t found anything.) there was a moment in their teens (midschool ig) where a girl confessed her feelings to lwj and wwx immediately says lwj has bf and it’s him. they were roommates, too. I think it was due to university of something like that. they were questioned by jc and nhs if they r real lovers or not. also, there was wedding (not 100% certain if it’s jzx & jyl’s) wwx starts questioning himself if he was really inlove with lwj. reminder that they r not friends with benefits. they were just playing, holding hands or hugging e/o. I am not actually the person who was finding this fic but I am interested, til now, no one has found this fic. Thank you! #16 of post

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11. Hi mods! For the next fic finder, I’m looking for a WWX traveling to the past fic in which there was a scene where he and LZ were talking about his husband (future LZ) and his children I think. And LZ is just there listening yet at the same time being jealous about it ‘cause he doesn’t know it’s him. #12 of post

NOT FOUND! Travel Back Down That Road by iSwallowMy_converse

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12. Do you know this one fanfic where Lwj tries to kill himself but he ended up losing memories and Wei ying found him. They ended up getting married to each other and go on adventures and then lwj gets his memories back bc his brother is playing music. #14 of post

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13. Hey! Im looking for two fics. A) One when Wen Chao pushed WWX down.LWJ went down and he kissed him. I think they were on a established relationship by then. JC was looking at them flabbergasted. #16A of post

Heyo mods! I kinda remember the scene in #16 but not much. It was time travel fic i think and that scene was in Xuanwu cave. WC pushed WY down and LZ also went down. I think WY had an injury and LZ kissed him to distract him. Hope this will help to find it! Im sorry I can’t help more

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14. Good evening, Mods! I was just wondering if there were any fics you know of that involve Wangxian hiding their pregnancy from LQR (specifically LQR but not from anyone else), who finds out only after the baby is born and is hurt to realize that they didn’t trust him with their growing family? I feel like I’ve read something similar before but for the life of me, I can’t seem to find it #8 of post

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15. hi, do you know about a fic where lan qiren decided to act as a good father figure for the two jades and gives advice to the disciples, i lost the fic, and its killing me #13 of post

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16. Hi! Hope mods are doing great! ^.^ I have a weird request, because I need to find a fic, but also ask for others with a similar theme (nice, but will make you cry). It was a modern au, and kind of in the suburbs. I think the Lans are new, and lwj meets troublemaker wwx, but doesn’t know how to get close. There’s a fire in the Jin house, everyone except jgy and, I think jzx die and blame wwx. I also remember lwj and wq go to uni together, and they usually meet at the library. Pls help me. #17 of post

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17. Hello all, i hope everyone is doing fine. I am so happy we’re all still here 💚💚💚 i don’t know what i’d do without y’all. So i am looking for a fic. Although I’ve never read it 🤦🤦 i know it’s a fix it fic where jin zixuan kinda abdicates to move into lotus pier with his wife. He talks to meng yao and he’s like you are a much better leader than i’ll ever be brother. Meng yao is super touched and actually stops all his evil doing. And they all live happily ever after. I THINK. Since i never read this, it might actually be like just something i saw posted on tumblr and not an actual fic 🤷🤷 i hope it is tho. Much love 💚💚💚 #19 of post

FOUND? could be scorpion, before the frog by Stratisphyre (T, 59k, LXC & JGY & NMJ, JGY & WWX, JZX & JGY, JYL/JZX, wangxian, Dragons, Found Family, Pre-Relationship, Mutual Pining, Canon-Typical Violence, Parental Abuse, Hurt/Comfort, warning for JGS behaving exactly as expected, sometimes a redemption arc is just dragons and kids and found families, allusions to noncon because of JGS, derogatory references to sex work, suicidal ideation and attempt) but I think it only partially fits?

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18. Hi! I was wondering if you could help me find a fic? I only remember one scene where LWJ said something (or assumed something) that led to a misunderstanding between him and WWX. When it cleared up, LWJ said “What have I done to you?” and WWX answered “I think you broke my heart a little”. I’m sorry if it’s super vague, but I can’t remember anything else, except for the fact that it was almost certainly a complete fic with only one chapter. #5 of post

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19. Hi!! For the next fic finder can you help me find a fic where WWX is a little, and the Jiangs refuse to let him become little. In the story there were 3 types of people: Carers, Littles, and I think like someone who isn’t either. So when they go to CR, LWJ finds out, and he tries to help WWX get away from the Jiangs. It’s been awhile since I’ve read it, and I can’t find in my history. I would really appreciate the help! #11 of post

Hey!! I’m the anon who asked for #11 on the recent fic find. It wasn’t Being Vulnerable is the Only Way to Allow Your Heart to Feel True Pleasure. I definitely remember that both JC and JYL went to CR with WWX, and they were both making sure that WWX didn’t regress into a little. Another scene that I kind of remember was that LWJ discovered that WWX was a little while he was writing the rules in the library. And another scene is that WWX basically has a breakdown when he witnesses MianMian being able to regress into a little

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20. hi ❤️ for fic finder, id reaaally appreciate your help! the only thing i remember is that jc finds out that wwx doesn’t have a core but wwx tells him some lie about the reason (wzl?), but later they’re at LP i think? and wwx confesses the truth to jyl but jc was standing at the doorframe, hears everything, yells a lot, and then ??? yunmeng sibs feels ig? its not Tether or The most dangerous thing is to love (both wonderful).. i feel like i went thru every single core reveal fic ctrl+f-ing the word door 😂 #16 of post

hi, i asked for 16, and sadly its not Silence Like A Cancer Grows (even though its a great angsty fic 😭), i remember reading it in like 2020, and i think the reveal happens in the great hall or throne room or whatever its called. thank you!

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21. This is a bit out of the way but I was wondering if you guys could help me find a certain twitter thread about, like, a huge family dinner with the mdzs characters where “who is going to pay the bill” devolves into hijinks and a lot of politeness judo. and ends with nie huaisang going “i paid the bill while i was in the toilet” #1 of post

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22. Hi! Thank you for all the wonderful work you are doing, this blog has brought me a lot of joy. I am looking for a fic where JC and WY fell out after trying to save JYL from drowning when she was caught in a net underwater. And WY had to keep diving down to give her air, and he was really exhausted and delirious afterwards. JC got really angry at him. And the fic is about how JC had to do something similar and realised how difficult it was and tried to reconcile with WY. Hopefully that’s enough info, I can’t remember much else! Thanks very much :) #9 of post

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23. Hello mods! I hope you’re doing well! I was wondering if you guys could help me find a fanfiction that I’ve been searching for but can’t find. I remember that it’s about wwx who died and came back either as a ghost or a fierce corpse during the sungshot campaign, I’m not sure if he died when he was thrown into the burial mounds, but I remember that he helped them win the war and then passed on peacefully after, I remember that they knew he was a ghost too. #16 of post

Hello! It’s #16 from the Last fic Finder, unfortunately it is not that one:( if I remember correctly, wwx passed on as soon as the battle was over, on the battlefield.

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24. Good day to all of u mods. Thank u for your service in help us lost souls. So sorry to bother u all again but I’ve been searching for a fic that I lost long ago and I’ve only read about 1-2 chapters i think.If I’m not wrong the story is a bit horror. It’s a modern au and I remembered that WY unalive himself and there was a phone call from LWJ to JC and JYL telling them about this. And if I’m not wrong, it was implied that WY unalive himself because he was always haunted (by ghost or memories -I’m not sure because I only read the beginning- of Madam Yu).I’m sorry if this is really vague. I’ll also keep trying to search for it. I really appreciate your help. Thank y #2 of post

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25. Hello wangxianficfinder! I heard that there was a reincarnation/modern au fic where Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji got caught in the rain and then hid in a cave to wait it out. Could you please help me find it? #6 of post

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26. For the next fic finder. I’m at my wits end trying to figure out what fic I’m thinking of. I believe it was a war fic (not sunshot) where wwx was on one side and the lans were on the other tho I’m not sure. What I’m sure of is someone (wq?) commenting that in battles with one particular leader (wwx? lxc?), there are a lot more ppl who make it to the medics, as in fewer deaths on the battlefield, so that leader is an honourable one. Anyone recognize the fic? #10 of post

NOT FOUND! Crossing Paths by Ilona22

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27. Hi, I am for a fic where WWX time traveled to the past. I can’t quite remember the details, but I remember Wen Ruohan some how knows WWX played an important role in the war so he wants to capture him. Since WWX time traveled, he’s the only one know why WRH wants him, but the others are kinda freak out why WRH wants to capture a teenager WWX. I’m sorry for this little detail, but I hope you guys can help me find it. Much appreciation!! #11 of post

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28. I’m looking for a fic that takes place post canon, and its Xicheng. From what I remember LXC is doing horrible in seclusion and JC secretly hides his bell when he visits one day. They become friends while LXC is still in seclusion and one day, after LXC precious gift from his parents break, JC goes missing. JL tracks JC through his clarity bell but finds it at LXC’s place. LXC goes on a journey to find JC and finds him injured but with a replacement for his precious gift he got from his father. A very clear but beautiful crystal I think? That’s all I remember @youkaimeimi #12 of post and #1 of post (This ask had been accidentally added to two different posts ^^; apologies for any confusion ~ Mod C)

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29. Hi! i hope you’re having a great day!! this blog is everything to me and it makes my day and makes finding fics so easy!! thank you for the hard work ^^ I’m trying to find a wangxian time travel fic. i don’t remember much except that there was this one scene in the library. wwx travelled back in time and was with lwj and thought he was the only one who travelled back until they’re in the library and lwj asks wwx about lsz and wwx is shocked that lwj is from the future. thank you <3 #2 of post

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30. I’m looking for a fic I remember only one scene. It’s a modern fic and there was a scene where LWJ & WWX were dining together. The food was very spicy and LWJ had a strong reaction for it, got like really overwhelmed. #12 of post

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31. Hi guys! I’m trying to find a fic but I only remember one thing about it 🙈 LWJ was the god of devotion. Hopefully someone remembers that 😬 #20 of post

I don’t recall a god of devotion, but here’s some divinity fics:

despite it all by novalotypo (T, 292k, wangxian, canon divergence, god of luck WWX, memory loss, non-linear narrative, WIP)

We’ll Build This House on Stone (Altars) by FluffyHippogriff (E, 236k, wangxian, angst w happy ending, romance, supernatural elements, friendship, old god LWJ, YLLZ WWX, hijinks & shenanigans, canonical character death, nonbinary character, nonbinary bichen, WIP)

In God’s Eyes by VividestList (E, 23k, wangxian, LSZ & WWX, NHS & WWX, gods & goddesses au, kid fic, mpreg, public sex, mortal WWX, servant WWX, moon god LWJ, marathon sex, identity reveal, pregnancy kink, unplanned pregnancy, angst w happy ending)

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32. Hello. Can you help me find this fic, please. 🥺WWX could jump between universes. And he found one where other him gone mad or something. WWX tried to save LWJ of that universe, but LWJ wouldn’t leave, if his WWX die, he would die with him.

I’m not sure if it time loop or not, because somehow I think WWX had asked LWJ to leave about hundred times before. (These’re dialogs I tried to write from my memory, it might not be entirely correct.)

LWJ: How many time have you asked me?

WWX: About hundred, and you never leave.

LWJ: You could be wrong. This time it might be different, I can save him.

WWX: I’m not, because I’m him. I know this because my Lan Zhan died and I survived. So please don’t make me watch you die again.

That’s all I can remember. Please can you help me find it. Thank you. 🥺🥺🥺😭 #2 of post

NOT FOUND! A Necessary Evil by @gravitywonagain (M, 870, Wangxian, Major Character Death, time travel, hurt/comfort but mostly hurt, I’m not going to lie this is all angst, not a happy ending)

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33. Hello! I was wondering if you could help me find a crossover fic between TGCF and MDZS, I remember only a scene in which Hua Cheng finds a bloodied figure of Lan Wangji with everyone in town dead around him. And Wangji was like ‘look what they have done to my A-Ying’. I hope this is enough to find it! #10 of post

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34. Hello! I am looking for a fic where the mountain goats pushes wwx too far that he commits (t.w.) sewerside? Then I remembered there were 2 ocs and that all the goats that hurted wwx were killed and that woman was wwx’s mother (??). I also remember this being an characters watch the series au. Thank you and have a nice day!! #18 of post

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35. I’m searching for a fic and I feel like I’m going crazy–went through 80 pages of AO3 history with no luck, but I know I read it. Almost sure I found it through the OG wangxianficrecs around a year or more ago through one of the ff or itmf posts. I *think* it goes like this: very BAMF WWX, taking place post-Nightless City, has a better understanding/control of his powers because of his 2nd death, has godlike powers w/o negative side effects of resentful energy. Maybe in MXY’s body but not sure, just think there was a scene of wangxian in bed together in the CR and LWJ is worried about people knowing he’s WWX and how they’ll react. But it could just be that WWX didn’t die at all, or came back earlier than canon somehow. Some things I know still happened (LWJ still got whipped for defending WWX), but others are fuzzy (like maybe the Wen survive somehow?) I’ve read SO MUCH I wondered if I was conflating multiple fics like Imperfect Memory by Xantissa and help is on the way by Vamillepudding, but too many things that just aren’t right about either. In the one I’m thinking of, WWX remembers who he is, LWJ is quick to express his true feelings (having thought he lost WWX), and have them reciprocated. It was definitely M or E, there wasn’t really a sub/dom aspect, maybe some theoretical stuff about mastering death so it’s unable to take him, being immortal without needing a golden core. #20 of post

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36. so it’s jin ling running around just postcanon getting the jin sect functional again where he decides he also wants to repatriate the artifacts in the creepy mirror? (jc has opinions) i believe he starts with the canon face-knife and also lots of juniors communication (uhhhh p sure wangxian are running around in the bg doing wangxian things …?) #6 of post

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37. Hi! Can you please help me find a fic? It’s an AU where all the women in MDZS decide they should all just leave and go travel and cultivate gardens or something. Tysm! #6 of post

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38. Hi! I’m looking for a fic where WWX and LWJ get together at cloud recesses? At the end WWX thinks LWJ is going to marry WQ, but it turns out to be a misunderstanding - I believe it was on AO3. Thank you so much! #9 of post

Hey - I’m the anon from #9 on the latest fic finder. Unfortunately “Take my heart” is not the one :( . The fic im looking for was not a time-travel, and a lot of the book events still occurred (qiongqi path etc.) - but at the end the wens were able to go to gusu. Also wangxian are together but not married until the end. Thank you so much for your help!

NOT FOUND! Take my heart by Lady KG (Not Rated, 22k, WangXian, LWJ Time Travels, Time travel, POV WWX)

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39. heyy im looking for a fic where lwj and wwx are both actors who are always in the same movies. they’ve also done several sex scenes together. they’re really popular celebrities and they both get nominated for oscars or academy award or smth but neither of them get it bc the judges couldn’t decide. if you could find this fic for me that would mean a lot tysm! #12 of post

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40. I am looking for a fiction that Lan Wangi and wei wuxian are tring to have a baby and it not working and they are invited to jiang yanli’s baby shower and wwx breaks down. #4 of post

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41. Since you found me exactly what i was looking for I came back with two more fics and to say thanks for finding the two i requested the first time.

A) So the first fic i want to request is one where wangxian time travel and at first they think its only them but later on in the story its revealed that because of something they did lan xichen, nie huaisang and jiang cheng also come back. but near the beginning of the story lan wangji helps madam lan escape and she goes to lotus pier and turns out she knows madam yu and qinghengjun comes out of seclusion i belive cause when they go to the lectures he and madam lan reunite and then our timetravels tell them what happens and there are multiple training dummies that are destroyed by madam yu and jiang yanli

B) the second fic is where after canon ends i belive almost everyone but wangxian and a’yuan were dead but a’yuan was making his way to deaths door but wei wuxian used this array or talisman yo send them back thousands of years and a’yuan reverts to his child self and wei wuxian and lan wangji get to raise him but eventualy become immortal or already were and i dont know if a’yuan becomes immortal or not but it doesnt really mention him at all after that except a brief passing. As the years pass wei wuxian and lan wangji travel and meet a lot of people including their parents and baoshan sanren. it time skips i belive and its after the lectures(?) and the sects are invited to the burial mounds where a whole bunch of relevant but not totally relevent people are, along with wei wuxian and lan wangji as their immortal sect leaders and the sects read the books but it doesnt actually show that part and madam meng and madam jin meet and at first madam jin is standoffish but eventually get to know each other, i dont know anything after that, most like where the last update was.

Sorry for rambling and making this request daunting and sorry if there is anything that is hard to read im on my phone and the the keyboard is not writing down the letters as i type them in. thank you for your time and i wish you a good day(ᗒᗣᗕ)՞ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ #7 of post

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42. Okay so I have a fic finder request for you guys if thats okay!! I don’t know if you’ll be able to find it for me because I really don’t have a lot for you to go on. Literally all that I remember is wwx and lwj talking to someone (a merchant? A shop worker? Maybe something with a festival?) And they had to solve a series of riddles to win a prize (I think it was 3 riddles) wwx solved one but then I think lwj ended up solving 3 riddles instead and gave the prize to wwx. That’s all I can remember!! But the scene has been in my head a lot so now I really want to reread the fic haha any help in finding it would be greatly appreciated!! Thank you so much!!! #16 of post

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43. Hiii thanks for all your hard work ✨🐇✨ can you help me please I read a Twitter thread fic but I lost it and don’t think it was over 😅 I was about wwx and lwj being married but wwx became pregnant and wanted ro surprise lwj but he thought wwx wanted to divorce So he called his lawyer and wwx heard it anc that’s all I got. 🫠😭✨ thanks again #18 of post

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44. Hello! Could you help me find a fic wherein kid! Nie Mingjue and kid!Nie Huaisang are kidnapped/taken into the Wen Sect? Their father (Sect Leader Nie) is still alive in this fic. I believe that one of the memorable things in it is that Nie Huaisang calls Wen Ruohan A-die or Father as a manipulation scheme? I hope you can help me find it, I’m going crazy over it! #1 of post

SIMILAR! Fire and Light by nirejseki (T, 31k, NHS & NMJ, Canon Divergence, Found Family, Families of Choice, Child Abuse, Child Neglect, Childhood Trauma, Implied/Referenced Torture, the bad stuff is mostly offscreen)

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45. Does anyone know that one fic, I think CR era, where Lan Wangji meets Jiang Yanli and thinks she’s unusually generous because she’s encouraging him to marry Wei Wuxian into the Lan clan? #10 of post

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46. The other fic was where wwx and lwj ran away together (modern fic) got married and years later wwx saw jc at store and talked #17B of post

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47. Fic finders: It’s Untamed-verse (post canon), in LWJ’s pov. I think it starts with LWJ looking for WWX in a village, then it flashbacks to him receiving a letter where WWX writes that he has fallen in love with a farmer and marrying him, if LWJ would come to the wedding and give his blessing… which obviously catches LWJ off-guard because he’s been kinda assuming that WWX would come back when he’s ready, so now he’s all jealous and pining, and needs to see for himself what the hell is going on. They do end up meeting and go on a night-hunt together, and LWJ notices that WWX is actually acting weird. The reveal was that WWX was actually under some kind of love spell and that the “farmer” was a rogue cultivator trying to bind WWX’s literal life to him and use his powers. #20 of post

NOT FOUND! You’d Break Your Heart to Make It Bigger by vesna (mrsronweasley) it sounds kinda like this fic minus the letter part

SIMILAR! Boy Trouble, We’ve Got Double by saltyfeathers It’s actually the reverse, where lwj is the one who gets cursed

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48. Hi, I remember reading a short fic set during the Cloud Recesses study arc where Wei Yang is kneeling after punching JZX and Lan Zhan talks to him. The conversation goes differently than canon and it ends with WWX saying: you have a book of rules where your heart should be. And the fic ends with saying it took LWJ years to heal from those words @/knifeshoebookworm #3 of post

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49. Another modern au fic in which WY is accused of a crime when he’s younger, perhaps in his teens (I don’t remember what he did exactly or if he actually committed it), but he still ends up getting arrested and LZ is the only one who stood up to him at the time. Then a couple of years later WY is released, becomes a police officer and works together with LZ at the same police station, probably as partners. I think LZ is kinda ooc, instead of being shy, quiet and frigid, he’s quite bold and sweary in this fic. Also I recall a specific part that is set by the end of the story (it could be the last chapter), a party is happening, maybe a wedding or celebration of some sort, and Wangxian goes to the bathroom to hook up or have sex. There’s a chance that this belongs to another fic, but it doesn’t hurt to try. #15B of post

FOUND? Keep Track of Losing Days by giraffeter (T, 74k, WangXian, NieLan, Modern AU, Case Fic, Police, Missing Persons, Mystery, Getting Together, Flashbacks, Rooftop Conversations, Detective LWJ, antifa WWX, team give LWJ friends, Angst with a Happy Ending, Sharing a Bed, First Kiss, First Meetings, Seattle, Mutual Pining, nonfatal car accident, mafia wens, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Friends to Lovers, Guns)

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50. Hello! Wondering if anyone might be able to point me to cute (possibly a) one-shot (it’s short) wherein WWX (with one other person) descend from Baoshan-sanren’s mountain because they looked into a well that showed them their soulmate/fated one. They go to Yunmeng Jiang first. They’re pointed to the Lan clan due to the robes in the “vision”. Cue Romantic™ Gusu Lan’s excitement reaching fever pitch. We get WangXian’s first meeting in LXC’s POV. Thank you so much for your work! ❤️ #17 of post

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#wangxian #mdzs #wangxian fic finder #wangxian fic search #the untamed #wangxianficfinder #Wangxian Fic Rec #The Untamed #MDZS #wangxianficfinder compilation post #missing fics #long post

101 notes · View notes

drwcn · 4 years

Note

I can’t wait for more of your discordance au, I’m a sucker for angsty wangxian! I’m actually really curious about what’s going on with Lan Xichen the whole time he’s gone. Is he recovering for all that time or is there some political plot he needs to take care of? I saw that courtesan Meng Yao tag too which makes me even more intrigued 👀👀👀

Awww you guys >:) Thank you so much for the encouragement.

Unfortunately, Xichen and Huaisang are not a pair. The hidden agenda of this fic is xiyao (lol sorrah), and I know people tend to feel either YAY or NAY about xiyao so I’ve totally separated the wangixan and xiyao part. You can read one without the other and it wouldn’t make much of a difference at all. At best Meng Yao is mentioned in end of the later wangxian parts once or twice.

I love Xiyao because I think it’s full of possibilities. Obviously canon!xiyao is tragic and problematic af, but this is an au, so... I do ...what I...want? Meng Yao in this au is his own worst nightmare - a courtesan, and Zewu-jun is the handsome polite gentlemanly amnesiac he saves.

Below cut are more reasons why Lan Qiren longs for the sweet release of an early qi deviation (arc synopsis of lan xichen & meng yao’s half of the story).

Lan Xichen’s Arc: where politics turned deadly.

Well, just because Wen Ruohan isn’t a thing doesn’t meant the Yin Irons aren’t a thing. Is there political bullshit waiting to happen? Absolutely. Except our protagonists are proactive this time.

For months, both Qinghe and Gusu have been getting reports of strange sightings along their Lanling borders. NMJ and LXC have been investigating, and they suspect that JGS may have had something to do with it. Prior to Lan Xichen’s disappearance, he was getting close to finding out the truth.

What happened was this:

Xue Yang (who will exist solely in other people’s narration) had killed the Changs and taken a piece of the Yin Iron. Upon capture, XXC and SL (both alive and well and doing their own thing) delivered him to the Chief Cultivator, thinking justice has been served. (Lol. no.). Once JGS got his hands on one of those, he began to plan world domination bad things with it and shit started acting fucky right away, eliciting the suspicion and subsequent investigations of the Lans and Nies.

Jin Guangshan does wonder how his secrets are being leaked, but he doesn’t get to find out until the end.

Lan Xichen, on his part, is fairly sure of what’s been causing the appearances of these so called “fierce corpses”. He knows about Lan Yi’s barrier in the Cold Cave, and suspects someone has gotten their hands on a piece of the Yin Iron. Both he and Nie Mingjue suspect Jin Guangshan, and have been quietly collecting proof.

Jin Guangshan, not about to be defeated so easily, sets up a trap and ambushes Lan Xichen during one of his investigations. LXC was in “plain clothes” as part of the investigation, because it’s dumb to go around investigating dressed as the Sect Leader of Gusu Lan, but during the ambush, Lan Xichen loses Liebing and Shuoyue in the process. The only thing he has on him is Shuoyue’s sheath when he is found by Meng Yao.

When Lan Xichen wakes up, he doesn’t remember anything or who he is. He sees a pretty young man who introduces himself as Lianfang. Lan Xichen was wearing blue when he was found, so “Liangfang” calls hims A-Lan.

Meng Yao’s tragic back story that’s actually tragic:

The bullshit - er, the story - as always, starts with Meng Yao getting kicked down the steps at Jinlintai by his Ho™ of a dad Jin Guangshan. In this universe, Jin Guangshan isn’t just a rich powerful Sect Leader, but also the Chief Cultivator. If anything, he has more reason than ever to make sure Meng Yao isn’t around to besmirch his good name (not that he has any good name to bismirch).

Claiming Meng Yao to be a liar, Jin Guangshan ordered his goons to have Meng Yao “taken care of”, but before that could happen, Madam Jin had come out to see what was the commotion. This was Zixuan’s birthday celebration after all, everything had to be perfect.

What she saw certainly enraged her, but her husband was about to kill a boy, possibly his own son, spill blood on their son’s day of birth celebration. Such cosmic bad karma she couldn’t possibly accept. “You don’t have to kill him, you absolute buffoon, just make sure he never comes back here!”

She meant buy his silence with money but Jin Guangshan had a more permanent solution.

Before the day’s out, Meng Yao was sold to a brothel, and was told “that’s where you belong”. Once, perhaps, he had dreamed about gaining the love of his father, but no longer. Now he simply wants his father ruined and dismembered.

But first he has to live.

The madam of the brothel had a keen eye for “good merchandise”, and one good look at young Meng Yao with those big eyes, delicate frame and dimples and she knew she could make big bucks off of him.

(And before anyone asks how old MY is here, the answer is: young. One of the many reasons why I would personally like to volunteer to stab JGS until it looks like he’s been cursed with the Thousand Holes Curse.)

The first couple of years were decidedly grim for MY. He was kept away from customers (mercifully), but he was a brutally trained in the art of dance and music. They kept him fed enough to dance but not too much to “ruin his figure”. His instructors quickly found that the youth was a quick study and got up no matter how many times he was trampled on (literally and metaphorically). It was no secret that life was gruesome, but Meng Yao survived. Meng Yao made his debut. Meng Yao became famous.

The establishment where he made his debut renamed him Lianfang - to collect/gather fragrance - and so from then on, he became Lianfang-gongzi. Soon, his art (and other stuff) caught the eye of an obliging patron who purchased him from the madam.

The patron, by all accounts, was a brute of man who had more appreciation for the liquor in his cup than the arts, but he was a cultivator, wealthy enough, connected to many other cultivator gentry familiues, and most importantly, led a subsidiary clan of the Chief Cultivator. As his prized courtesan and dancer, Meng Yao served at his whim, entertained at his parties and made happy his friends, all of whom were practicing cultivators or at the very least connected to the cultivation realm.

Our evil gremlin would not be our evil gremlin if he didn’t make the best of every situation. Meng Yao quickly discovered that not only was he particularly talented at getting people to divulge information to him, but that men were significantly uninhibited after sex and alcohol. Armed with a sweet face, an eidetic memory, and a hate inside him that longed to see Jin Guangshan severed limp by limp, he began his revenge plot.

(Here, I took inspiration from Nirvana in Fire’s character Princess Xuanji of the fallen Hua kingdom who was sold into servitude but established Hong’xiu’zhao, a spy network of girls/women who either worked as courtesans or secondary spouses of noblemen. Her goal was to create chaos and dissension within the royal court and government, like mites eating away at a large tree from within.)

Meng Yao amassed an enormous amount of intels on gentry families and evidences of the many underhanded conducts of the Chief Cultivator himself. He did this through his own work and through the other women working in his network, all of whom have been wrongfully aggrieved in some way. He promised them that one day he would help them to freedom.

For five years he’s been collecting secrets of gentry families, and had been stirring discord for three, weakening their cohesiveness, and using their growing animosity to weaken Jin Guangshan’s control on his subordinates. Naturally, Meng Yao heard about Xue Yang and the Yin Iron. It was also him who had been drawing attention to it for the other major sects.

Meng Yao doesn’t know Lan Xichen is the Sect Master of Gusu Lan, but he has no interest in hurting a man from nowhere. “You can stay here with me until you are better. After that, I’m afraid I’ll have to ask you to be on your way.”

Physically Lan Xichen recovered quickly, but when it was clear his memories wouldn’t be coming back, Meng Yao allowed him to stay.

The rest, as they say, is history.

Meng Yao has been Lianfang, been the famed courtesan, for longer than he cares to remember. He’s been had, used, and passed around by so many men that their faces are just blurried sillouettes in his memory. And yet, he’s never felt for a moment that he belonged to any of them, not even his patron, who possessed his contract and could resell him back to a lesser establishment and ruin him in a heartbeat.

But when A-Lan held him in his eyes, warm and dark like a summer’s night, without judgement or expectations, only gentle sweetness and a fond regard, Meng Yao could almost pretend he was just A-Yao, the name whispered reverently by those soft lips. The hand that held his moved to stroke his cheek, almost shy, and Meng Yao realized with a fearful pang that if this man from nowhere with nothing were to ask, Meng Yao could most definitely become his.

The thought scared him more than he was willing to admit.

The message delivered by the pigeon was clear. Meng Yao crumbled the slip of paper in his hand, then set it aflame in the candlelight.

The man who’s been living with him for the past four months, who he knew as A-Lan, who he trusted enough to take to bed, was the Sect Master of Gusu Lan: Lan Huan, Lan Xichen.

Zewu-jun.

Everyone, even a non-cultivator such as himself, has heard of Gusu’s Wei Wuxian, Lan Xichen’s young widower, left alone after not even six months of marriage.

But if even he wasn’t married, Lan Xichen could never accept him as he was, no matter now much his personal desire wanted him.

His hands shook. He balled them into fists.

Meng Yao should’ve known... he should’ve known it was too good to be true.

No matter, he told himself. This too, is an opportunity, perhaps the only one I will ever have. I will use it to destroy Jin Guangshan once and for all.

Lan Xichen made his way to the window, and gazed out into the courtyard where A-Yao was reading under the willow tree.

You should go home, a voice inside him said. Go home to relief Wangji of his burden, to release Wuxian from his mourning. Go back to the seat of Sect Master and the responsibilities waiting for you.

One more day, another voice fought back. Just one more day.

He doesn’t leave for another month.

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