#aaaaaaAAAAAA well I Tried :'D
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Oh Meryl.....:') This will be a longpost commentary on the events of Trimax vol5 & 6 primarily from her perspective, so let's get into it!
Alright, so remember the foreshadowing in Meryl's line about seeing Vash's 'entire enigmatic past' from Trimax vol3?!
Well in Trimax vol5 all that becomes true! When getting 'touched by an angel' directly connects her to Vash's memories through contact with his feathers, she gets a front row seat to personally SEE, feel, and experience ALL the worst pain and trauma Vash has endured over his functionally immortal lifetime of horrors!!! Bearing witness to just how heavy a burden of sorrow and torment he's suffered carried with him that she's always wondered about; now she knows the full context of everything.
From witnessing his lone struggles as a younger child first learning how to use a gun, grinding through all his bloody mistakes, losses, and failures, to the worst calamity that he, as a transformed nonhuman 'gun' himself, became capable of unleashing on the planet: the terrifying destruction of July itself.
As Vash regains his lost memories of July through a meltdown of grief, regrets and revelations of his own (how firing his power inadvertently killed everyone he knew and loved), all at once, his pain while reliving those horrors of the past resonates to become her pain. (Remember this for vol6!)
And just to grab a mic to reiterate, Meryl is only a normal human woman here, with no special powers or superhuman training to prepare her how to handle any of this! (This disaster exceeds her realm of expertise!) She’s also the only one who gets to see, understand, and resonate with the entirety of Vash’s pain and feelings on such a direct, private, and literally mind-melding intimate level of connection. (Linking the human with the inhuman/monstrous.) So of course she’s terrified! Being thrust into such an unprecedented dangerous situation, witnessing inescapable horrors beyond human comprehension, AND by getting a very real demonstration of Vash’s power (on the verge of exploding out of control) and his transformed inhumanity RIGHT UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL!
So it’s truly a testament to her mental fortitude and resilience that she didn’t just break from the information overload or succumb to the level of despair and terror right there--no, she bravely keeps her wits about her, and despite everything she remains on Vash’s side, shooting first to defend him (aiming right for Legato using the gun she picked up from Zazie's corpse) as the one who breaks the multiple-way stalemate between all their enemies instead! GO MERYL!!!!
(It's why this moment's probably one of my top favorites in the whole manga!!! ;o;) Cause the entire time, even while under severe mental distress, crawling through the rubble with his powers and feathers surging everywhere, Vash had kept her safe and physically unharmed within his wings, and then her first action upon surfacing was to take charge to protect him in turn!! I love it; cause even during such a dire emergency and all the mental stress she's put under while in the heat of the moment, her faith and dedication (to fight without hesitation at his side) still aim true~
And even after Legato critically pushes the crisis from bad to worse, to the point Vash is provoked into almost firing his Angel Arm in feral-retaliation to stop him (holy foreshadowing of their future duel!) with Meryl literally stuck in the middle of all this chaos (while shocked, powerless, and terrified--bless her heart) as Vash struggles to regain control of himself...
(Note: even Wolfwood was blown back by the surging energy, but with Meryl literally RIGHT THERE under Vash, it's amazing she didn't get hit being that close to him.) ...she STILL doesn't run away from him once the dust settles, and is in fact the first one to approach him in concern to ask if he's ok after...
(So whew, a relieved round of applause for Meryl remaining strong in the active face of so much strife!!) The immediate aftermath of this whole experience gives her the tangible proof and perspective from Vash to understand and fear that Knives--as his twin in power but having the actual intent to destroy the world behind it, is fully capable of ending humanity's future.
Of course, the experience doesn't also leave her unscathed without any lasting mental scars to cope with...as Trimax vol6 so graciously shows us how things will always Get Worse before they can get better...
Where sure enough, she's already having difficultly sleeping with night terrors and loss of appetite--it's honestly no surprise the terrible experience has given her symptoms of ptsd she'd be made of something unbelievably superhuman if she weren't affected, and consulting with Wolfwood unfortunately doesn't offer her anything (helpful) she doesn't already know...(cause at this point, she's literally seen more of Vash, especially the amount suddenly exposed to all at once, than Wolfwood could possibly know how to advise her on. He's still struggling with plenty of his own fears vs loyalties towards Vash himself.)
Only that he stresses the importance she weighs her options now to make the decision to quit her job while she still can (a choice and the freedom to 'get out' that Wolfwood comparatively doesn't have under direct orders from Knives) to remove herself and Milly from getting further involved with Vash--specifically the life-threatening danger he poses as a living weapon (despite his best intentions and character as a person!) set to explode with the firepower to raze the world--if Meryl values her life.
But truly, how does Meryl feel about that? What does she value and care for more, that'd be most important to her--her life or her job? Is following Vash (surveilling him for 'risk management') more than just a job to her at this point? What about her feelings towards him as a person--the man she already knows, vs her need to reconcile with the truth (that he's not even human!) that she didn't know until just recently. Is the level of imminent danger and risk she's putting herself into, now that she fully understands how dire, truly worth it (for him) this time? And if she still truly cares for him, does it even matter what he is? Despite any pros or cons and conflicting feelings about it, which will ultimately remain the stronger reason compelling her choice to stay?
Whew! She has many things to evaluate and consider going forward, especially if she wants to continue at his side. (And as Wolfwood stresses, continuing puts Milly at risk too, so that's even more weight/responsibility to balance on Meryl's shoulders.) Including processing the very nature of her fears--to identify what it is that truly terrifies her (is it truly Vash or something else?) before she can hope to face or overcome them. Before this biggest hurdle tips the scales to debilitate her resolve or outright prevents her from continuing her job at all. For now, she thinks and relates back to the firepower she gained when she first fired a gun...
And ah, HERE IT IS, she recalls what's scared her the most from her own past memories: "I gained the power of death at my fingertips. It was terrifying." Cause the first time she ever shot a person and realized the weight of the power she holds, she hated it. Shocked, collapsed, paralyzed, coming undone in the streets, closing herself off from others, regretting her action terribly... It was all too much. (Sound...familiar to the guilt and regrets of someone else we know? Meryl's shooting style is also notably non-lethal...because she too doesn't like to kill! When her first time wielding 'death' with her Derringers upset her this badly that she needed to adjust to be able to continue her job that required arming herself with this type of power...)
So remember when she resonated with the pain of Vash's memories? Seeing when he first struggled learning how to use a gun too, and all the blood and loss that accompanied it? However...his experiences didn't just end there, with only his first time shooting a person.....cause the first time he shot his real power (without him knowing what would happen) he caused the destruction of an entire city, killing everyone he loved in it! He didn't just 'gain the power of death at his fingertips,' he literally BECAME it, armed with the power to end the world. Hating and regretting his action so terribly, the catastrophe traumatized him with amnesia and led to a full-blown meltdown in grief and despair once he finally remembered. With Meryl there, witnessing and feeling all of it along with him. (His pain became her pain; his trauma became hers...)
That the sheer magnitude of wielding that kind of terror, as an intrinsic, inseparable part of himself (unlike a handheld gun you can choose to put down; he can't), let alone carrying the fear of it going out of control again if he's not careful, is indescribable. And if Meryl can now understand the gravity of that in relation to her own gun experiences (when the memory of firing her Derringers was already enough crushing weight for her to fear) then as the peace-loving person she knows him to be, who's always tried his hardest not to kill anyone, the crushing multitudes she knows he must feel now upon recovering his memories filled with so much death unleashed by his own hands must be unbearable. Feeling precisely just how much MORE terrifying and overwhelming the burden must be for him. It makes her wonder HOW can he still even bring himself to pull the trigger?!
Just look at Meryl's collapsed posture, it's the same she felt in her own past experiences...only this time it's directed in relation towards him--almost expressed in his place for the crushing weight he must feel. She's outright screaming/crying/bawling for him in empathy for the pain he must feel every time he's forced to fight and shoot someone with so much baggage behind it. Oh Meryl....:') (This is probably the strongest we've seen her cry for him...and it certainly won't be the last she cries in concern to relieve the pain of his burden.)
And Meryl, watching him fight on regardless, becomes struck and speechless for another reason, as she realizes how much his incredible strength and fortitude allow him to push past his unbearable pain to continue his job: "I felt...his determination is even stronger than the regret he carries."
Which is true, for the same stronger feeling that compelled him to stop at nothing, despite being on the verge of total collapse bearing his regrets of July, when he grit and forced himself to continue on his mission to save her from the Dragon's Nest. :') This is how he does it; how he continues to fight for what's important. (And yes she was that important, as the thought of losing her like his loved ones at July, is what fueled his determination back then to keep going.)
However, the struggle is never easy, as Vash, for his own part, masked behind his new goggle-edged glasses and kind Rem-like smiles 'as usual,' has not been coping well behind closed doors at all. (That Meryl could even sense an air of unusually 'off' distant/detached/avoidant behavior from him that she asks Milly about it.) We see him immersing himself in thousands of rounds of (non-lethal) target practice til his hand bleeds, and when drilling that level of focus + exposure isn't enough to take the edge off, he visits a church during service to hear a sermon on forgiveness...only for him to deem it hopeless there's no possible release from his sins when he can't even forgive himself, and there's even evidence he'd been drinking in not-quite-so savory (healthy or responsible) ways--unsettling even Wolfwood that something's uncannily off with him. (All being different attempted coping methods to drown out and escape the pain of his past regrets, but even Vash knows it's impossible now to forget...)
So all it takes is one slip-up when he's depressed off his game for everything to tumble into a trainwreck... Where Meryl seeing him block a bullet with his powers (instead of his usual self-aware dodging?) triggers all that terror to come flooding back into a panic attack.
Where it's truly unfortunate (and oh it hurts...) as an accident, something involuntary--a messy, instinctual reaction completely beyond either of their control. Cause Meryl didn't anticipate her ptsd to manifest and incapacitate her like this! that a single flash of his feathers would remind her of Everything--of all the worst horrors those powers are capable of when unleashed, the weaponized death and terror it represents, and the very moment she felt and experienced all of it while trapped powerless and panicked to do anything... No no no, returning to that headspace is horrible; it's all still too fresh to relive and TOO MUCH trauma for a human like her to bear; she couldn't help coming undone in the streets in a far worse way than she's ever had before (and I don't blame her.)
And Vash didn't mean to publically out himself as a nonhuman 'monster' to everyone either, when tensions were already high following Knives' mass murders for them to link the same culpability towards him, while he's still struggling to get a handle on his newly awakened powers too--ohshit indeed when they suddenly manifest and the truth breaches containment freaking everybody out in a witch-hunting mob of scorn, fear, misunderstandings, and hatred. (Ouch...)
What's more, Vash probably didn't even know Meryl had seen his memories, or had been affected by his trauma to such an overwhelming degree--since the transfer happened more as an autonomous side effect of his powers activating rather than anything he purposely intended....(once again, unintended consequences beyond his control; he never meant to cause any of this harm!!) So from his perspective he probably doesn't fully understand how to interpret her distress (apart from the crowd's?!) or know what to do to help. Cause reactions from strangers are one thing to bear, but if he sees her reaction to him--and his nonhuman display, as anything like theirs...then it's so much worse cause it's Meryl, who's known and been with him since the beginning. She's someone important he cares for...and now she's hurt and visibly scared from yet again another mistake he can't undo. ohno ohno he knows he messed up...
(Plus poor Milly has no context to understand what's wrong, or why Meryl's so upset either, since she'd been knocked out during the later parts of the Dragon's Nest to know what happened. So now she's alarmed and concerned trying to process why everything's suddenly gone to shit, anchoring Meryl the best she can, while shaken by the pain and cruelty Vash endures in such a situation masked with a smile...)
Despite the stones thrown by the crowd (nooo~) Vash's first priority concern is to run straight over to check on Meryl...
*And here's where I scream bloody murder* Cause that single flinch--from reaching towards her with that arm too, probably hurts him more than any of those stones thrown at him in hatred and revulsion that he's a monster. Cause to him it probably reads as a perceived rejection from Meryl (noooo~), and the amount he's hurt from realizing he's the one who hurt her this way....ohhhhh his crushing guilt must be heart-shattering...;A;
But there's no time, as before Meryl's even ready to speak or clarify how she feels, the choice she previously had on whether she wants to leave or stay is taken from her as Vash is the one who's forced to leave her instead. :')) The only thing Vash can do is repeatedly apologize as he runs away he can't even say goodbye--Wolfwood has to say that for him...and admit to Wolfwood how much he 'really feels like crying.'
(And once again poor Milly, left with no other explanations, can only read how much his pained empty mask of a smile has broken...)
What sucks even more, is knowing how much Meryl had already empathized with his pain (she could already feel that strongly for him!) and being in no condition to explain herself or her fears to him, once her panic subsides, she's bound to feel that much more terrible with guilt from realizing how her reaction (especially her flinch) had unintentionally hurt and pushed him away....leading towards a bad result she simply couldn't help and had no power to change...what a disaster.
But is someone as usually brave and tenacious like Meryl going to let that be the end of it? Broken on a disastrous parting and painful misunderstanding (she never meant to 'reject' him!!!) she literally had no say over? What of her brand of determination--especially towards what she feels (and decides) is most important, becoming stronger than the pain and regrets she carries? (Just like Vash! Can she find it within her to continue, or start over, inspired just as he does?)
Her struggle now becomes finding that strength (even a driving belief) to tentatively (re)build that trust and acceptance between them towards recovery. To endure, fight, and conquer those horrors to bridge (reconnect) the gap between the human and monstrous that separates them. (Especially if she truly cares and wants to do it--for the sake of what Matters, for what'll make the effort Worth it.) It'll be huge and seemingly insurmountable for any other person bearing the same strife she carries, but you can do it Meryl, I believe in you~~
#trigun#trigunbookclub#commentary#vashmeryl#long text post#aaaaaaAAAAAA well I Tried :'D#wanted to do this in vol5's week but didn't feel it'd be complete without covering the aftermath in vol6#and WHEW the repeated 9999 critical hits of emotional damage made this Difficult
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om g omg the push-up fanfic!! i love it so much!!! <3 but also imagine being underneath him while he is doing push-ups and giving you kisses everytime he gets closer to your face and just admiring your beauty AAAAAAAAAAAA
OMG OMG RAAAHHHHHHHH 🤭
This is probably the best thing someone has even said today. 😔
Anyways I hope you don’t mind that I made a little story for you <3
— Well Rested Workout
You were underneath Leon, as he was doing push-ups everytime he went down he would give you a quick kiss that you ’d return with a cheeky grin on your face, and he always would be smiling when you did so. It was all so natural. And you’d smile back at him whenever he had given you the chance to do so. He didn’t seem to have any complaints about it either way.
You loved this routine of yours where he kept giving you kisses every time he went down, so this was his motivation to keep working out. You knew that he had been training for over a year and a half now, but you still found yourself amazed by his stamina.
Every day, he would get you and himself up from bed before noon, to shower and head straight downstairs going to the gym before he left the apartment for work. He said it made him feel less stressed out knowing that he could take care of you, and that you could just relax in his office, while he was doing his paperwork.
That sounded nice to you. Besides, there weren’t too many people who knew about your relationship with Leon, other than Leon and a select few that you trusted, so it wasn’t like it mattered much what the rest of the public thought. As long as you guys could work things out, nobody needed to know anything. Plus, it was fun. You liked to watch him exercise everyday, whether it was because he worked out daily or because you liked watching him.
But you also really liked the fact that he did it with you, even though he never tried to make it anything else than what it was. He seemed to enjoy watching you workout, and since he had become obsessed with the idea of being in a relationship with you, he never stopped trying to persuade you to join him in exercising. You loved seeing him so worked up over something that he enjoyed, but at the same time you also enjoyed seeing him in sweat pants. He looked so good wearing nothing but sweatpants. When you watched him, it was kind of hard to tear your eyes away from him.
There were times when you were just looking at him and felt the heat rising to your cheeks, and then you’d remember that he had been saying things like this to you before. Your heart skipped a beat and you couldn’t help the smile that graced your features.
Having felt so lucky to have met him and gotten involved with him. The two of you were perfect together. He helped you feel more confident about who you were, and you helped him improve his self worth by showing him how much you admired him for who he is. You couldn’t imagine your life without him anymore, which was exactly why the both of you got married after a couple years.
You couldn’t possibly imagine your life without him. You never wanted to. You were so happy with him, it sometimes felt like an unrealized dream. The first day that the two of you were officially engaged he made plans to take you on one of the best honeymoons and he did.
#requests to bl1ss#bl1ss talks#resident evil#leon kennedy x reader#leon kennedy x fem! reader#leon kennedy#resident evil 🚔#leon s kennedy#leon s kennedy x reader#leon scott kennedy x reader
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Hooooooooly crap your latest Azul fic is probably the most intense, jaw-dropping roller coaster ride I've ever been on. Like oh my gosh, starting it off with such a suspenseful scene was such a good way of getting the reader's attention- not to mention the spiral as to how it even gets to that point. The in-betweens were so fucking good!
Absolutely obsessed with the way you describe the scenery and the inner turmoil, like it's so poetic and just creates such a delicious imagery!! The fluffiness in the first vow was soooo tooth rottingly sweet- Like holy crap got me giggling and kicking my feet over here. I absolutely adore the way you wrote the mc, especially with how well she was at handling Azul's negativity and self-deprecation at the start. Just the way you're able to make the reader's feel the same way as the mc- I was SEETHING. The amount of times I got so frustrated with Azul- Especially with how he tried to get her to stop working, like dawg, she's doin' it cause she likes it, JUST LET HER HAVE THIS ONE THING
I was so glad when mc called it off when she did, cause ain't no way Azul was talking about some "You don't care for me as much if I'm healthy" LIKE WTF ARE YOU SAYING?? LITERALLY RIPPING MY PILLOW TO SHREDS RN
Aaaaaaa and oh my gosh the way mc just snaps- just says 'fuck it' and just lets everything out was so satisfying yet also so scary cause like- bro's definitely not gonna just accept that. Holy crap the bits of dialogue as he realizes mc was leaving- I can't. I'm not okay. Like the build up?? Like we know what's about to happen, but the way we see his perspective as it's about it happen- My mouth is agape. Eyes bulging out of skull- THAT WAS SUCH A GOOD SCENE!! Actual chills
Ending it on the hospital scene as his mentality just reverts back to how things were before her- Ugh... I can't- I can't function anymore. I have never been gagged so much by fanfic- like the life has been sucked out of me in the best way possible
Definitely will be re-reading, there's no way I could be fine with reading it only once
Such a satisfying conclusion too- like oh my gosh <3
OMG OMG THANK YOU!!!!! THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH AAAAAAAAAAAA (≧◡≦) ♡
I wanted it to feel like a fic that suffocates you with sadness and emptiness while you're reading it, so opening with the aftermath of the murder felt appropriate! It sets such a haunting mood because you don't quite know why Azul did this or what happened for things to turn out this way (until you read the end of the fic), which only makes it more unsettling the further you read.
:D I'm so happy you enjoyed many aspects of the fic, especially the short-lived fluff in the beginning! I think that was my favorite part to write out of everything (although the hospital scene is a close second). Azul and Reader were so genuinely cute together in that scene. T_T if only it could be like that always...
And I'm especially happy you liked the way I wrote the reader's character here!!!! I wanted her to be more in tune with emotions than Azul is because it felt like a nice contrast to the very out-of-control, emotional Azul. She's honestly such a sweetheart who is just trying her best to be genuinely kind and loving despite the situation. Azul is so frustrating here, so the fact that Reader could remain patient and gentle throughout six entire years of their marriage... It felt satisfying to write her finally snapping at him, so I'm glad that was a scene you could enjoy! I liked switching perspectives partway through as the focus strays from the subject of Reader and her bringing up the divorce to Azul's disturbing behaviors as he begins to lose himself to his fears and insecurities. And then he just shuts off and tragedy ensues. >_< it's heartbreaking and scary and so many other unfortunate things!!!
And the hospital scene oooooo yes yes!!!!! Azul's psychology in this fic is so fascinating to me. He really did mean it when he said the reader was his world, so with her no longer in it his entire existence undergoes this drastic shift and suddenly he's not whole. He's lost a vital part of himself, the part that felt loved and appreciated, and so now he's back to floating through life with this lonesome emptiness and self-hatred. Now the world is small and devoid of color. Now it's just monochrome and cold.
Aaaaaaaa I loved writing him in this state of slow, uncertain delirium and the way he panics when the nurses won't answer his questions. I also greatly enjoyed writing him using the phrase "my wife" over and over because Reader is no longer just her own person to him. She's Azul's. His wife. And then there's also the symbolism in Azul killing Reader and knowing that no one else will have her ever again and that, because he got to take her life for himself, it will be no one else's. It's not even Reader's anymore.
Forgive my ramblings!!! I'm just very happy to know you liked the fic and that you will be reading it again!!!!! Thank you so much!!!!!! 💖
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Grian and Mumbo didn’t know Tubbo very well, but his death still hits them.
NUH UH. NUH UHHH. NO. NUH UH. HES NOT. HE CANT BE. WE DIDNT SEE HIS CORPSE. EVERYONE KNOWS THEYRE NOT REALLY DEAD UNTIL THEYRE SEEN DEAD, AND EVEN THEN THERES A CHANCE. I REFUSE TO ACCEPT THIS LINE AS REAL.
Grian saw his loneliness, his pain. He knows that’s real.
and here we have grian being the fraying string tying the three tentatively together. thats so grian of him.
It’s only for a second before his knuckles make contact with Scar’s cheek, stinging his hand.
that was SO satisfying. i know scars going through hell right now and has been for a while but that was SO SATISTFYING. grians anger is so satisfying. everything about their rage and grief and hurt is so real i love it
He latches onto that gut feeling he had earlier, and he knows which side Scar’s truly on now.
grian really embodies the best parts of humanity doesnt he? hes a million times better a man than me. how hes capable of being so.. so grian will never fail to amaze me.
“But I punched you, so I’d call us even for right now.”
i really doubt thats how it works but sure thing buddy.
“Something’s inside it,”
yk what would be the coolest thing ever? if tubbo's alive and in that box and turns out hes been known about scar's whole fae magic thing and tubbos fine and alive and ALIVE AND ALIVE and scar's changed through his supposed death and TUBBOS ALIVE AND
Tubbo smells of smoke, and he could certainly use a shower, but he’s alive, and Scar weeps tears of joy.
HA. HAHAHA. HA. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. HA. HA HA HA. HA. YOU TRIED TO FOOL US YOU EVIL AUTHOR. BUT YOU COULDNT FOOL ME. I SAW THROUGH YOUR CURSED TRAPS LIKE THEY WERE A CLEAR PANE OF GLASS. HA. IM EXTREMELY HAPPY RIGHT NOW. SOMETHING BAD BETTER NOT HAPPEN OR I WILL CRY AGAIN.
He can only hope.
OF COURSE HE CAN HES GRIAN!!!!! AHHHHUFHDHNSKFHSJDJSHSHDHDJWHDBD. ok. okokok. my playlist has done some INSANE work here because it played immortal by mitski when scar found the fire and its playing battle cries by the amazing devil and if those arent the perfect songs for those scenes idk what are
ARC TWO IS OVER!! AAAAAAAAAAAA im so SCARED but so EXCITED AJHHFIDGHSJFHDJHEJDJAJRBDHWH
you, mochi, are an absolute menace. i dont feel this much, ever. punch my face and call me scar because im feeling so many things right now.
I think I’ve mentioned it before but !!!! getting to write grian punching scar, and him getting angry with scar, was SO cathartic and satisfying. it’s finally out in the open and there and AUGH. grian 100% deserved to express that anger toward scar and I fully intended to let it happen
but then it was also soooo important that he (along with us, the readers) acknowledge the fact that scar is also a victim in this. did he do bad things? absolutely. but his hand was forced. and grian seeing that needed to be there
and :D I’m really pleased with how arc 2 wrapped up hehe. I’m glad it felt satisfying <3
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I read secret and I actually really like how Wu is more dominant in their sexual encounters because I feel like it means more. Like mako is physically stronger but he lets Wu be in charge and he is 100% for submitting . I just love consent and shit. It gives me a warm fuzzy feeling that both of them want each other so bad in a perfect way that suits each other. Wu had been powerless his whole life and been told what to do but with mako he can explore that more domineering side and take things at his own pace. And mako has always had to make the bid decisions so he probably enjoys not having to think and being guided. But yeah I love seeing muscly subs and twink doms. I know their relationship isn’t full on bdsm or whatever but I think u get what I mean
AAAAAAAAAAAA i'm sorry I do freak out a little when people send asks about my fic I can't believe people like it enough to talk to me about it!!!!!!!!!
One thing I was trying to explore (idk how well I did it) was the process of 'finding oneself' sexually after a lifetime of shame around it.
I made Mako completely comfortable in his sexuality, never having had anyone in his life that made him feel like he was wrong for liking who and what he liked. Confident and comfortable with his attraction to all genders, as well as not really having any hang-ups around different sex acts... And yup that includes submission.
I don't want to go too hard into the armchair psychology of dom/sub dynamics because people like that stuff for all sorts of different reasons but basically in my fic Mako has had the chance to explore his sexuality with no negative repercussions and figured out what kinds of things he liked because of it.
Meanwhile Wu had a lifetime of shame and zero experience because of it. And it is really scary to take that leap and try things out when you've got all that baggage around your sexuality! It's really important to have a careful, thoughtful partner when you're in that vulnerable position. And Mako was that person.
So yeah, letting Wu be more in charge and dominant in bed was pretty natural for both of them. And I think Mako in general doubts himself and his ability to read situations accurately (he does just fine reading situations for the most part! But his prior relationship struggles are always looming over him to make him doubt himself anyway) so I hc that he just really appreciates clear, straightforward guidance. Not just in bed, just like. in general. Mako doesn't want to make guesses. (Gahhhh my heart breaks when I watch him struggling to understand what's expected of him as Korra's boyfriend in season 2. When he literally asks "Uh, do you want advice, or am I just supposed to listen? I'm still not clear on that." 😭 He tries so hard!!!!)
And I wanted Mako to realize the fragility of the situation with Wu when he realized Wu was willing to forgo boundaries to be with him at first. Mako knew he needed to be careful so he didn't take advantage. That's why he offered so much and asked for nothing in return, and let Wu decide if and what he'd reciprocate.
And yes the physically stronger person submitting in bed is a really nice dynamic, I feel like. Lots of trust going both ways, Mako, who has always been 'the strong one' being more vulnerable: Wu who has been used and manipulated his whole life getting to decide... These things don't always have to manifest in this kind of d/s dynamic but it's been really interesting to explore.
I didn't want to get tooooo deep in to the d/s dynamics but like. The vibes were there and I'm glad you noticed them but that they didn't feel like they were too much!
#wuko#mako#prince wu#king wu#answered ask#anonymous#i did hide this under a cut but i guess i'll still mark it mature?
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Your damn fic altered my brain chemistry on god, I've not been able to stop thinking about it, how could you do this to me, :'D
Something about Riley is so... So... <333, y'know? How he's angry at his past self but not really because well deep down he knows it ain't his fault but he's just a bit bitter about it, how he's so completely and utterly in love with his Johnny (I was so so so scared for a while that it was gonna turn out Soap dies and doesn't reach that old age thank you for not doing that actually I don't think I'd have been able to handle it), how he's just...
Aaaaaaaaaaaa,, I love him ;-;. This fic is going like way up there on my top five most devastating ones ever or else the list I like to call:
"this either just fixed everything wrong with me, ever, or made me infinitely worse"
thankyouthankyouthankyouuuuuu<3
It started as a dumb idea and then I decided to go the Crack Treated Seriously route with it, and it turned out very angsty-feely
The love towards Riley is soooo incredible, he's a bit mean with his past self, but I think it's only natural to be hypercritical of past actions...
And I tried to be as vague as possible on the details of Riley's life, so that everyone could imagine what they wanted. So Soap can be dead, not dead, anything you want! whatever suits you best!
I'm very flattered by this ask<3<3<3
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Zombie!Yuu...basically they’re stuck in a purgatory state where they can’t die. And also they don’t crave brains. It’s a good idea! :D
Honestly if it’s pretty funny when Yuu dies and then falls out of a coffin (“Is this some kind of sick joke??”)(Basic foreshadowing). Nothing is coherently wrong with Yuu- it was like they were perfectly normal. It wasn’t until during the prologue with the fight against the dwarf overblot, did something become apparent.
So remember the ghost AU where the trio died? Yeah, scrap that because only Yuu died. Got yeeted by the drawl overblot and broke a lot of bones. Deuce, Ace, and Grim all freak out because there’s no way in hell someone survives that.
But then Yuu looks up groaning and yells, “DO SOMETHING! ATTACK IT AND DEFEAT IT!!”
They snap back and ignore Yuu and they manage to defeat the overblot. After, they rush over to Yuu, concerned.
Yuu: What the fuck happened to me?!
Ace: I have no idea- WHY IS YOUR ARM POSITIONED LIKE THAT?!
Yuu: Wh- AAAAAAAAAAA
Ace: AAAAAAAAAAAA
Deuce: Wait! I think I can fix this. Uh...let me just...*Snaps the arm back into place*
Yuu: ....That didn’t hurt. Why the fuck diDN’T THAT HURT-
So not only can Yuu survive death situations, they also have a high pain tolerance. To feel pain, Yuu has to be free falling from over 50 feet with no parachute or any safety gear. Their body also deteriorated - though this is subtle. It is only recently noticeable late into Chapter 4 and early Chapter 5. It’s basically Yuu’s skin falling off and holes forming. They’re a walking corpse without the scary stuff, because they still have their mind.
Grim: How is this even possible?!
Yuu: Hmm...oh wait, maybe it has to do with something when I died at the Dwarf Mines? I mean, we can all agree I was supposed to die.
So Yuu is basically invincible to fights and stuff. The problem is, is that they have a conscious and do their best to not freak people out. Are they starting to smell like a rotten corpse? Well, I guess they have to ask Vil for any perfume recommendations to hide it. Accidentally snap their back during a Magishift match? Pretend everything is fine while they ask Deuce to snap their back in place (“There are kids watching! We can’t have them traumatized!”). Overblot yeeted them into the frozen tundra? Well, good thing they can’t feel cold!
Yuu accidentally traumatizes everyone during overblot fights. Kalim almost vomits when he sees Yuu’s neck snap in an unpleasant way. Floyd squeezes Yuu a little too hard and crushes their ribcage. During that one Magishift game at Savannaclaw Yuu tries to grab the disk from Leona and gets injured. It looks really bad; their nose is bleeding and everyone can clearly see that their fingers are bent the wrong way. But Yuu hasn’t realized this, and has grabbed the disk and continued to try and score like they weren’t probably in some agonizing pain. (Which they aren’t, to be fair.)
Beastmen, Merfolk, and Fae can sense/smell Yuu’s deteriorating body and unless they are particularly close/know the truth they stay far away from Yuu. Not even perfume can hide the scent of decaying bodies from them. Because of this, Yuu tends to avoid going to Savannaclaw, Octavinelle, or Diasomnia a lot.
#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland imagine#twisted wonderland headcannons#twisted wonderland yuu#ace trappola#deuce spade#zombie!yuu#ask#tw: body mutilation
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Tetherball is a game where two players use their hands to strike a volleyball which is suspended from a stationary metal pole by a rope or tether. The two players stand on opposite sides of the pole, and each tries to hit the ball one way; one clockwise, and one counterclockwise. The game ends when one player manages to wind the ball all the way around the pole so that it is stopped by the rope. It must not bounce.
(Spoilers ahead! And when I say spoilers, I am referencing both the show and potentially the book as well.) (These are my thoughts and opinions)
1 x 05
I like the opening! Getting right to business! It reminds me of that one scene in Toy Story 2 haha
Ah, so Dr. Curtain promoting Sticky to Messenger is his take on “keep your enemies close” I suppose? (Also interesting how he calls him Sticky instead of George)
See, he’s still pressing them about arriving on the same day 👀
God, Tony Hale is really pulling out all the stops as Dr. Curtain in this episode, it truly shines through. It’s such a subtle type of menacing, it honestly gives me chills sometimes
“So many dots and dashes” yes Kate that is in fact what Morse Code is
There’s… nobody at the Institute with red hair??? How and why does Sticky know that??? Has he seen every single student???
“He should not have angered the gods!”
They didn’t even bring their breakfasts with them dhkdgdks
Oh God it’s the Shining twins
Ah so they can’t use Morse Code anymore……
Milligan what the hell are you wearing
A FALCON?????????????? MADGE?????????????
Oh hey I was wondering what the episode title means
But seriously Number Two is gonna spend all of the last episode talking about “unnecessary risks” and then get a falcon?? Make it make sense!
Dr. Curtain be like “I am going to evilly browse my hat magazine and evilly select my evil hat”
The kids might be starting to feel the effects of the messages. Or maybe this is just natural strife. Either way…
Martina kinda has a point about the bucket
“Roommate, not friend” yeowch
IS THAT SCARECROW SUPPOSED TO BE REYNIE ADHKSGSKSGS
AAAAAAAAAAAA THE SCARECROW GDKDVDKSGKSGS OH MY G O D
MISS PERUMAL MY BELOVEDDDDDD
The way she found them…. absolutely amazing!
AND YOU’RE STILL GONNA LIE TO HER, MR. B??? “Oh yeah he’s fine, perfectly fine
🥺👉👈”
The. The tetherball diagrams oh my lo r d
Constance rifling through the bucket hslsgksgs
The design of the Whisperer is not at all what I expected and yet…. unbelievably fitting. Definitely retro Sci-Fi, which is what the show has been aiming for I imagine.
There’s absolutely no music in this scene, no sounds except footsteps and the three of them talking. It’s subtle. It sets the mood. It’s unnerving. It’s, dare I say, mysterious.
CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE CONSTANCE SCENE……. The way she comes to appreciate the statue as a fellow artist, and it moves her to tears…. The way we see her figuring out the puzzle….. the music and the atmosphere….. her face when she finds the panel….. it honestly filled me with nostalgia for my own childhood, playing out in nature and imagining fantastical scenarios like the puzzle she’s solving (obviously VERY different stakes here, but still). I also think this is one of the only times we’ve seen Constance alone so far. Seriously debating giving this episode a 9/10 rating for this scene alone.
THE WHISPERER WAS SIRI ALL ALONG AHAHAHA
“Was it enjoyable?” “You know what, it was!” A nice callback
Interesting how, unlike in the book, the Whisperer prods Reynie for his true worst fear.
Number Two interrupting to (presumably) keep Mr. Benedict from falling asleep
Has Constance… been stomping on the panel for hours????
“You know what I don’t like? People who don’t do what they say.” Like, someone telling you you’ll go somewhere again, and then disappearing off the face of the earth, perhaps?
“Emergency! Doom! No-one at the wheel!”
“Not being wanted. Not being wanted at all.”
Dr. Curtain:
There’s no cameras in the hallways? Or guards?
They’re putting the pieces together!!
THE MISSING AREN’T MISSING THEY’RE ONLY DEPARTED!!!!
“Please… eat your food…” quite ominous of you Number Two
“I’m sure they’ll make contact after their search of the underground tunnel I sent them into. :3”
The press release room!!
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT MACHINE
Oh my goddddd… this scene with the girls hiding and eavesdropping is unbelievably tense……..
“We helped create the Emergency today.” That’s bleak
GIRLIE YOU CALL THIS HUMANE??
Farm?? Forest???
Evil monologue time!
“Tell that to your invisible lawyer.” Eye-
Noooo come on Miss Perumal,,,,, I hope she’ll come back 🥺
Ooh, so this is the moment that convinces Mr. Benedict to try and end the mission!
This conflict where Sticky is drawn in more and more by a sense of belonging at the Institute… I’m so glad that they’re developing what was touched upon in the book!
YEAH CONSTANCE, THAT WOULD NOT BE NICE!
“Ok, what’s the plan?”
Reynie:
MRS. PERUMAL!
Ooh, the number is disconnected…
S.Q. :D
It’s still disorienting to hear them refer to each other as dad and son
Bruh, the way Dr. Curtain twists S.Q.’s words…. I hate this man
“Everyone has an opinion, dad.” “For the moment, anyways... not after tomorrow.” 👀👀👀👀
TLDR:
After lots of deliberation, I think today’s episode is the first 10/10. There were no glaring pacing issues, there was a balance of comedy and drama (leaning towards drama), lots of questions are starting to be answered, with more focus being placed on The Improvement and how to stop it (a perfect mid-season tonal shift), and there were moments both large and small that truly rounded out this episode. It’s really not only what I expected from this series, but also a delightful culmination of the storytelling and stylistic choices made by the cast and crew thus far. With three episodes left, I think this series is right on track to deliver a stunning finale (should the episodes continue with this level of quality).
Mr. Benedict explaining why he had to send 4 children to their possible deaths
#mbs liveblog#mbs spoilers#mbs#mysterious benedict society#the mysterious benedict society#sorry if this review sucks I’m very tired and had no time
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Hiiiiiiii!! :D
Ive just re-read always red (ive last read it in like a year ago when stay the black had like 3 chapters but Life Happened bleh). So anyway i just got back into star wars and remembered that yeaaahhh i read that valeska/cal fic that i was FUCKING OBSSESSED with and AAAAAAAAAAAA IT WAS STILL SO GOOOODD. Dare i say better than the first time.
I just love how you write cal like as in his screwedness. How he is capable of doing nice things and he tries to make the mc happy but sometimes he just Doesnt Understands. It brokes my shriveled little heart every time when i read these two words in the story. Baby boy got fucked up real bad :( And i honestly think ive never loved a reader character as much as i love the mc. (i even made an avatar for her that i spent like 2 hours on)
And their dynamic!!! Broooooo (gender neutral) it has me on my fucking kneeeessssss. How cal just becomes a puddle of goo when his girl going all assertive and he is like oooh she is murdeous alright out for my blood!! Baby stabbed out my eye skskrndkejrn when can i marry I WANT IT NOW. In my head cal is the "thats my boy!" suburban dad type except he be like sitting on a dead body looking with heart eyes as the mc slaughters people, going absolute bananas and throving force lightning and cal is just Hell Yeaaah thats my girl!! Do you see that? (asks the dead body) Thats My Girlfriend!! I love her!! I LOVE YOU BABY YOURE DOING GOOD!! Hes a very supportative boyfriend. I love them. I could die for them.
I havent started to read stay the black again YET but im planning to spam you with comments. I saw you wrote some 3 chapter long thingy that i tried and not read before i reach its place in the story but like. Its hard yo. I want to know :"D
Anyway. I had this very long very put together thing in my head to tell you what i adore in this story but it didnt ended up really uh. Well. Hope it at least makes some amout of sense :D
Sending lottsa love to you! <3
It’s youuuuuu!
All your favorite things about them are my favorite things too!
There are so many things that cal just doesn’t get. He might not ever but i think he’s trying and honestly this is the kinda growth that he might not have a choice in really.
I would LOVE to see the avatar you made for MC if that’s something you’re comfortable sharing! I love her too. She’s out there doing her best and getting worse everyday for it.
I hope you enjoy stay the black as much the second time around!
And really thank you so much for this juicy ask. I literally stopped to hug my phone to my chest at least three times while reading this.
🖤 you!
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Reading One Piece pt 191: How To Apologize
Chapter 438
Thoughts:
- Fpos/cs: Oh? Someone will attack them or something
- Mini flashback to Straw Hat House
- “Usopp will come back?” !!!!!
“Yeah, he was refreshing on the beach” SANJI YOU’RE THE BEST! I knew you would tell them!
- Everyone wants Usopp back, Luffy most of all :D
- Wait, wait, wait, what is Zoro saying
- “I will not approve of him until he apologizes!” I agree but isn’t an apology, like, implied here
- Oh wait, it’s actually important. I’m not surprised but
- I’m not writing that speech
*hits Luffy’s head* *Bong*
- shit, he’s totally right tho
- So Zoro is basically asking Luffy to be serious here because it’s a serious issue
- Well, it WAS a serious issue. It was a DAMN PROBLEM. I MADE AN ESSAY
- Shit I can’t focus and that’s important
- “It’s none of my business that you usually joke around, but if you humiliate yourself yet still want to claim any pretense of being my leader, then I will be the one to leave the crew this time!” NOW HE’S MAD AT LUFFY! HE WON’T LET YOURSELF BE LEADED BY A CLOWN
- “I agree that it’d be for the best if that fool decided to come back.” He does want Usopp back! But under conditions! Both for Usopp and Luffy!
- “But I will never let him back in if he has no intention of excusing himself and tries to sweep this under the rug!” shit, that’s kinda what Usopp wanted to do. I know it will end well but Usopp needs to rise to Zoro’s standards FAST. Man up, man, we all know you can!
- (so that’s a definite no on smuggling Usopp on the ship, right. Chances were small, but still)
- “If that happens, we’ll leave Usopp behind on that island!” !!!!! Who’s undermining Luffy now!? I know that’s not what’s happening but WHY does Zoro have to make it even more stressful????? aaaaaaa
- Straw Hats are lowkey panicking at Zoro just like me
- “IS LEAVING THE CREW SUCH A SIMPLE THING!!!???” SHIT HE MAD FOR REAL
- “Nami-san… unfortunately, he’s got it right this time!” Sanji vocally defies Nami and agrees with Zoro on such a big issue? I know it’s not as big a thing as fanfics make it look but it’s still pretty big
- (Chopper watches adults argue. Let it be a lesson for you, kid, don’t grow up. Not too fast at least)
- “In the future there’s no way we can trust a guy who does such a thing on a whim! Simply put… If the first thing Usopp says is his deepest apology, then it’s alright for him to come back… but if it’s not, then he has no place to return to.” Harsh but true
- “WE AREN’T PLAYING PIRATES LIKE KIDS HERE!” Luffy looks kind of chagrined. These words probably stung. A little too close to home I think
- “Are we clear!?” Yes. They’ll wait for Usopp to show up and apologize
- End of flashback
- …Usopp’s still nowhere to be seen. Come on, Usopp, I believe in you
- Oh look, it’s Grandpa Garp and Aokiji! (And Coby and Helmeppo but that’s a given with Garp)
- Lol, Aokiji is napping
- Oh shit, Usopp is coming to the ship
- SHIT HE’S TALKING NONSENSE
- JUST APOLOGIZE USOPP THEY’LL TAKE YOU BACK WITH OPEN ARMS
- This manga needs to stop stressing me out like that
- Straw Hats are waiting for Usopp!
- Franky is asking about it but Luffy is pretty chill now. He had time to process that thing with Usopp
- WAIT THEY ARE NOT WAITING FOR USOPP, THEY’RE SAILING AWAY
- “I was waiting for him! Ever since Sanji told us the story, I waited for him at that room at Galley-ga , so someone could welcome him but he never showed up! This is his answer! I’m sure he… will have fun too. I don’t think he’ll quit being a pirate so hopefully we’ll see him on the sea sometime!” I never thought I’ll see the day where Luffy’s smile will be fake. This… this is quite painful actually. He waited for Usopp and Usopp didn’t show up. Shit
- Marines and Straw Hats see each other now!
- “Hey, Luffy, can you hear me? This is your Grandpa!” that’s hilarious
- …did he threw that cannonball all by himself. What are you eating, Grandpa Monkey
- What IS Monkey family
- “Does he know it’s not a baseball!?” exactly! Grandpa, that ship is brand new! Don’t throw things at it!
- “Shall we begin, kids?” Grandpa is having fun. Straw Hats are having traumatic experience
- Oh, Usopp showed up!
- (He’s still in the city. How is he gonna help)
- I kind of don’t want to keep reading. DON’T make a fool of himself, Usopp, there’s a time and place for these things
- (aaaaaaaaaaaa)
- THE **** YOU DOING USOPP
- THESE STAIRS ARE SO BROKEN THEY’RE NOT HERE USOPP WHY
- WHY IT’S ALWAYS LIKE THIS WITH THESE PEOPLE
- Straw Hats are too busy protecting the ship from cannonballs to address Usopp
- Meanwhile Usopp is totally fine after that fall. Since when did he stop to take fall damage
- STOP TALKING USOPP WHY
- (Well, he runs towards attacked ship with absolutely no thought about his safety. I think it counts as something. The devotion is plain to see. But, Usopp. Everyone knows you’re devoted, that’s not a problem here. Please use words. DIFFERENT words)
- Shit
- Chopper is desperate but everyone decided to ignore Usopp’s admittedly stupid talk. This is painful to witness
- “…what? …Are you really gonna leave me?” !!!
- “I see… I’ve had enough!” stop acting mad when you’re heartbroken, Usopp, damn
- “If that’s how it is… then let me say one more thing…” here it comes
- “I’M SOOOOOORRRRRRYYYYYY!!!” oh god, finally. Everything will be fine now
- “I’m sorry for being stubborn! I was wrong!” Usopp is crying
- “Usopp!!!” ARE YOU SATISFIED ZORO? DO YOU APPROVE THAT APOLOGY ZORO? ZORO ANSWER ME THIS IS IMPORTANT
- (he’s smiling. Or at least showing teeth. We’re fine)
- “I know it’s shameful! And I know I said I left the crew!”
- “Please make me you nakama one more time!” so much tears
- Luffy to the rescue!!!
- lol
- “Idiot! Hurry and grab my hand!” TEARS
- Finally… Everyone’s together!” AT LAST, LUFFY, AT LAST
- “Let’s just get away from that bombardment and head for adventure, guys!” YEEEEAH
Alright! Now that’s everyone’s FINALLY in one piece (heh), it’s high time for Daring Escape 2. Electric Boogaloo! TO NEW ADVENTURES!
rOP 190 rOP 192
#one piece speed read#the balance is restored#Usopp is back#Zoro has what we call a healthy self-respect#long post#spoiler#spoilers#have a nice day#rOP 191
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Sense and Sensibility Readthrough Part 10
Chapter 13, Pages 54-61
Today I actually paid attention to the meaning of the lyrics to Rolling Girl, and couldn't stop myself from crying. Then, like a sucker, I looked for English covers, and cried again. Oops. Song hits too close to home. Anyways.
Previously, Margaret was the best character. Marianne x Willougby now confirmed beyond reasonable doubt to Elinor, and Mrs. Jennings and everybody else now knows that Elinor has a secret beau. Poor Elinor, and probably poor Edward in advance, too.
Relatedly, two old friends dragged me out last night to witness the rare event of yours truly drinking, which mostly involves me pulling entertaining faces at weak cocktails after a single sip, because alcohol tastes as powerful and godforsaken as nuclear fallout to me, and lingers just about as long on the poor blasted wasteland of my helpless tongue. I don't have a secret beau, but they still did insist on dragging out of me every plausibly hypothetical detail, and then proceeded to try to set me up with the waitress of the night when there predictably turned out to be none. I dearly love my friends, but, Elinor, my point is that I want you to know that I feel for you.
I feel like sometimes I turn these preambles into diary entries. I'm entirely okay with this, though I should probably tag them somehow.
Also, oh my lord, this chapter sure happened, wow.
Readthrough below.
Chapter 13
Apparently things start really evolving now. Exciting. (EDIT: THEY SURE DID)
THEIR INTENDED excursion to Whitwell turned out very differently from what Elinor had expected. She was prepared to be wet through, fatigued and frightened;
Aha, Austenism coming up, first thing.
but the event was still more unfortunate,
Yess called it. So how was it worse? Were there floods? Surprise Edward & Mrs. Jennings meeting?
for they did not go at all.
... my expectations got double-subverted. Well, something is about to happen. I see now why all the details of the coming trip were attached to the last chapter instead of opening this one. They're out to picnic, and;
eager to be happy, and determined to submit to the greatest inconveniences and hardships rather than be otherwise.
I love this line. Anyway, while they're eating, Colonel Brandon receives a concerning letter though; his faces changes colour and he has to leave temporarily, like a really important phone call.
I guess this will be the impetus for change?
Haha, Lady M tries to stop her mother from prying into Brandon's personal business but Mrs Jennings is just not that type of person. Brandon's not really forthcoming and says it's just business in town, but he does have to leave immediately to attend to it.
It sounds really urgent. Him not being present means they can't go to the venue Sir Middleton wanted to use, which was an estate Brandon was related to. He's effectively cancelled the whole party for a business that where apparently, "I cannot afford to lose one hour." He's still not forthcoming on what though.
Willoughby and Marianne make snide comments betting that Brandon has invented the excuse himself to cancel the party because he's a spoilsport. Guys, please. :(
Sir M is very accomodating of Brandon regardless. He's a good-hearted fellow, really, if a little dim occasionally. Aww, Brandon says goodbye to Elinor. That's sweet, I really enjoy their friendship. Help I teared up slightly, I think I'm still emotional from the song. Marianne gets a silent nod. Yeah, I understand.
Anyway, now that he's gone, Mrs. Jennings starts eagerly speculating the reason for his urgency. A "Miss Williams" supposedly.
WHAT
SHE'S HIS DAUGHTER? BRANDON HAS A DAUGHTER? His NATURAL DAUGHTER? She's good enough at least to only reveal the daughter part to Elinor, but, damn. Wow, uh. Wow. People sure gonna bug him about Miss Williams now.
Wait but he's 35 right, so how old is Miss Williams?? When do people have kids again?? Oh my gosh, is Margaret going get a FRIEND HER OWN AGE?? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!
"Oh yes; and as like him as she can stare. I dare say the Colonel will leave her all his fortune."
But WHAT HAPPENED? Why aren't they together right now? Why is he attending random parties alone? aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
Though I do wanna say that does make the Mrs. Jennings' hypothetical Marianne/Brandon pair a bit stranger. Beyond just a man who could be her father, a daughter who could be her sister? That's something alright.
after some consultation, it was agreed, that although happiness could only be enjoyed at Whitwell,
HAHA, I really enjoy these lines. It's the kind of thing where it's not what anyone is intending on meaning, but it's accurate to what's happening in a roundabout way. Anyone everyone goes on a drive instead and presumably Willoughby and Marianne have a very romantic time on theirs.
Another dance in the evening? Is that just what rich people do all day? ... Do rich people still do that all day? Wow, there are like 20 Careys, a family who has now been mentioned twice that I recall and I don't know if they'll be important or just filling up the numbers.
Also I admire and yet detest the seating arrangements haha.
Mrs Jennings -> Elinor -> Willoughby -> Marianne. Willoughby, why you separate the sisters? You don't seem to talk much to Elinor anyway. ... are you trying to hog Marianne? Is that the play? I'm not judging here, I'm just curious. Would be sneaky play.
Despite the general pattern of narrative voice, it is abundantly clear that Elinor is the primary focus here as all the information is exactly and only what passes through her ears; makes the seating arrangement of Mrs Jennings on the other side very clever too, beyond just the charming blocking of having her lean over two people to harass Marianne with her mysterious Romance Sleuthing Acumen. Apparently she has figured out exactly where Marianne and Willoughby have gone on their "drive", and thanks to seating Elinor will now hear too.
HAHA SHE CALLS WILLOUGHBY MR. IMPUDENCE. This and Willoughby calling Elinor saucy, the dialogue really doesn't pull punches sometimes. Apparently Willoughby took her on a tour of his to-be-inherited estate. Elinor pieces together that Mrs. Jennings got the beans spilled from the servants. I told you two! Don't discount the servants! Mrs Jennings sure doesn't! Treat your groom a greater friend, Willoughby, and mayhap the seal of loyalty might have affixed his lips. :'D
Ah, but Elinor is still worried about propriety. Elinor, I love you dearly, but this is most harmless romanticism really. It's not like the horse thing. Haha, aww, Elinor's tactitly acknowledged Marianne’s relationship and intentions with Willoughby, and Marianne does that thing where she sort of lost the argument but is too pleased to really turn it around.
Haha, Marianne returns later to describe the actual house she saw with great enthusiasm. She's just that excited, how very Marianne to gush so; she might also be gloating juuuuust a little over having seen the house and expecting to inherit it. :'D Very amusing; poor Elinor to have to listen to it though, deliberate or not. Her own beau is so far away, and his own inheritance dicier. Must sting a bit.
AaaaaAAAAAAAA this has been my hour but I NEED TO KNOW ABOUT MISS WILLIAMS. I would have continued onto the next chapter, hour be damned because it's saturday, but skimming through Brandon doesn't come back. I don't want to skim too far ahead but as far as I can tell he doesn't come back for at least 10 chapters noooooooooooo you can't just spring that on me and leave me hanging aaaaaaaaaaaa. :'(
Ahh well, I suppose if I were any of the Dashwoods I wouldn't expect to see him until "after winter" anyway, whenever that will be. That'll be it for today then, I suppose. :'D
I think with the addition of Miss Williams, Colonel Brandon and his DAUGHTER are now the most intriguing characters to me. Not being able to find out their deal for weeks is gonna drive me nuts. I hope he's not an absent father though...
Miss Williams is also an instant favourite for just existing, because as you can see with Margaret, I have a soft spot for children caught in an adult world.
#1300 words#Jane Austen#Sense and Sensibility#readthrough#novels#Margaret = Brandon > Elinor = Mama Dashwood > Marianne > everyone else#Diary Preamble#also if you caught the pesterlog reference#that was deliberate and its one of my favourite pesterlogs
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HI YAY IM SO SO GLAD YOU WANNA WRITE YOUR IDEAS AAAAAAAAAAAA!! I can’t WAIT to see what you come up with!!
Also there’s no need to be sorry for taking the time to write out a thoughtful answer, that’s very kind! Please do know that even if you do accidentally miss a point, though, I can just rephrase my question in the next ask so it comes across more clearly. Sometimes I don’t really communicate as well as I think I do ^///^ No worries!
I’m so glad I DID say something about that part, then! I really need to comment on fics more 😅 I know many authors like it, I just sometimes have trouble putting the words together. That part was easy to comment on, though, because of the overwhelming feeling of AAAAAAAAA BABYYYYYY🥺 and and aND??? Miko baffling a grouchy Fowler with her demands for pizza was HILARIOUS, I wonder what he was thinking about when he went to the base? (“Those dang kids... what have I gotten myself into? The giant robots never asked for Dominos.”)
Pancakes are good, but consider: waffles are just pancakes with extra pockets. 0 w 0
Hiya! Just checking to see if my bigger message got through. I literally Just sent it, no rush to respond, I just figured it'd be better to know whether or not it got through as early as possible. XD I've heard Tumblr can be picky about (of all things) ellipses, and I did type one as part of that ask. Thanks for talking btw! I'm so glad asks make you happy ^///^
OH AND GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR SHORT FILM AAAA that's a HUGE project and frankly your determination is inspiring
HI AGAIN!!! <D YES!!! I’m excited too!!!!!! >//w//< ^^’’
And thank you! :)) Yes, if I miss the idea of what you were talking about please explain it to me! >///<’’ That is totally ok :3
Uwu comments on fanfic are always welcome and appreciated!! For us authors, knowing what the readers enjoyed or didn’t enjoy is helpful, and compliments are very nice <33 ^^’’ But of course, never feel forced to comment if you don’t want to! I totally get what you mean!! Sometimes I really want to tell an artist or writer that I like their work so much, and there’s like a specific element to it that makes it so great!! But like,,,idk how to phrase my praise properly so the best I can end up doing is keyboard smashing and throwing emojis because my feelings for the thing are so strong lolol O//~//O 💝💝
AA YES YES!!! THat was something I really enjoyed writing!!! Lmao 😹😹😹😹 Miko pestering Fowler for free pizza 😹😹 theres a part of me that wishes that were canon.... TwT But anyway, I’m pleased you enjoyed that part too!! ^^
Another idea I’ve thought about since then is the kids daring the bots to make the call to the pizza shop when they wanna order. Like Miko has some money so they wanna make an order. And then they dare one of the bots to physically place the order over the phone for the laughs 😹😹😹
AH AND OF COURSE! I haven’t actually thought about that before, but now that you mention it, waffles are indeed pocket-pancakes!!! ajsdjdsjsdj I love this I’m going to call them that forever thank youuu 😹😹
Oh!!! And thank you very much!!! I tried my best and submitted it on time!! So that’s great! The only scary part is that I’m pretty sure it looks as rushed as it was......so idk how that grade’s gonna turn out.....but at least I was on time! ^w^
So anyway, I suppose I’ll get back to paying attention to class T//w//T but yes!! asks always make me smile <33 Thank you for stopping by!!!!! And have a great day!! (or whatever time of day it is for you ;3)
Bye for now!!
-Kuni
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Angsty headcanons on if instead Arthur or Javier's s/o gets tb and suffers the same fate Arthur usually is suppose to get, pwease? Sorry if it's confusing!
AAAAAAAAAAAA Thank you so much for this angst ask!! I think about this all the time, I even have a fic idea for it too :’D Anyways! Enjoy!
Javier:
You didn’t know how to tell him at first. You had gotten sick. Not just any kind. A deathly kind. But everyone had an idea. You weren’t looking like your usual self. You were sickly, pale, and eyes sunken in.
One night you approached Javier. You looked like a skeleton and the low light of campfire didn’t help.
He tried to make a light joke while asking if you were okay. You sat down beside him in silence, shaking your head slowly. As you brought your knees up to your chest, you wrapped your arms around them while resting your chin against your knees.
“What did the doctor say?” When he asked that question, you felt like crying. You shook your head again and hid your face.
You told him you were dying, every word was spoken in a shaky and broken breathe. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing.
“How much time do you have left?” Not much. The doctor said you’d be lucky to live another month. You expected Javier to leave, run away, or distance himself. But he didn’t do any of that.
In the following weeks, as the gang began to crumble, and as you lost every ounce of strength in you, he never left your side.
There was a lot of talk of leaving between the two of you, but you knew it was only talk. You grew weaker by the day. It had gotten to the point were you could only walk a few steps away from your bed, before falling to your knees, coughing up blood and wheezing so hard you couldn’t catch a breath.
The day came when you knew you wouldn’t last to see another sunrise. You were so weak that you couldn’t sit up, you couldn’t move your arms, and every time you inhaled, it was like knives cutting into your throat, lungs, heart, and chest. On top of that, the gang was literally falling apart. So many people had already left. You would have too if you weren’t inches from death.
You passed away in your sleep, during the middle of the night. You felt nothing, no pain, just the warmth of Javier laying beside you and the low rhythmic pattern of his heart.
Arthur
It had been years... since Arthur had passed. His grave laid before you, overwhelmed with flowers and bushes. This would be your last visit. Your love for him was as bright and strong as it was the last day you saw him alive. You came to visit him, here on the mountainside during the warmth of a mid-July. You wanted to say your goodbyes, for you had quietly been carrying the same virus that killed Arthur, deep inside your lungs.
Doctors said TB could lay dormant for years before showing any signs of progression. You knew you only had a few months left to live. And every day you thought about Arthur. If this was how he felt, what he was thinking if he was watching over you or not.
You left is grave and traveled towards west elizabeth. Short on breath, you collapsed off your horse. You coughed and tried to pick yourself up, you could hear a wagon in the distance steadily approaching. Someone let out a yell, you couldn’t hear what they said because you were coughing so hard.
The wagon stopped, and two people ran up too you. “Is she dead?” No, you were still coughing, and you held yourself up by your arms, head hung low and hat covering your face. Something felt off though... you couldn’t put your finger on it. “Not yet,” That voice... It sounded familiar. “Well!” the first voice spoke again, it was a woman, “Help her, John!”
You looked up quickly, “John?” You coughed out. The sun blinded you, but you could make out those scars regardless, “John Marston? Abigal?” You looked between them, never expecting to see them alive again.
They were shocked to realize that it was you who they found dying in the middle of the road. Abigal and John instantly helped you and brought you to their home. They were living happily on a little farm in breacher hope. They had been living there for a few years now.
Once you had regained some strength, you explained to them your unfortunate fate. They insisted that you stayed with them, and so you did. You felt at peace oddly. Like you came home to your own family. You got to relive some wonderful memories. John and Abigal were still the same, so was Uncle, and Jack was growing quickly.
As your condition got worse, John gave you a gift. It was Arthur’s old and worn journal.
It gave you hope in your greatest time of need. It was like having Arthur back by your side again and you didn’t feel as scared anymore. Being able to read his thoughts, and know what he was thinking in his final days, gave you the peace of mind you needed. It made your own final days feel light, free and filled with love.
You had passed in the middle of the night, holding Arthur’s journal close to your heart, fingers still clutching tightly to it.
#red dead#red dead 2#red dead redemption#red dead redemption 2#arthur morgan#javier escuella#van der linde gang#x reader#reader insert#head canons#rdr#rdr 2#/you#/reader#arthur x reader#javier x reader#asks#requests#anon#Anonymous
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SINoALICE x Code Geass: Resolve to Take Up a Sword: Turn 1
*Italicized only dialogue indicates in-battle dialogue
-
A r e y o u s a d ?
Y o u w a n t t o r e w i n d i t , d o n ' t y o u ?
I a c c e p t y o u r w i s h .
W e l c o m e , h y p o c r i t e .
W e w e l c o m e y o u .
-
Part 1
"No, that wasn't Euphie's intention..."
Choking on his voice, Suzaku opened his eyes.
When he came to, he realized he was laying in an unfamiliar place.
His eyes were drawn to what was reflected in them, the pocket watch that was a memento of his father.
Though his hand was already moving to take it, Suzaku's eyebrows were furrowed in confusion.
(This was supposed to have been left with Euphie.)
Yes, she suddenly massacred the Japanese, and so Zero shot her, but in her last moments she was worried about the Japanese even as her chest stopped moving—
(Maybe this is a dream?)
Suzaku began walking with a vague awareness.
As he was aimlessly walking, a voice suddenly rang out from overhead.
"Out of the way, please!"
When he looked up, a girl fell from a tree.
Feeling a sense of nostalgia from somewhere, Suzaku reflexively caught the girl.
"Um, you aren't hurt, are you?"
"I'm okay... Um, the truth is, I'm being chased by bad guys."
"Eh?"
The girl was a shrine maiden who bore the responsibility of performing a ceremonial dance as an offering.
It seemed like peace would come to this world because of it.
"In this world, fighting is an everyday thing. I don't know if it's true or not, but if my dance can bring peace, then I will believe and try.
But there are some that try to get in the way... Like that!"
"Eh?"
As soon as the girl had noticed, Suzaku's sword cut the threat that had been chasing the girl.
"Suzaku!"
"It's okay. Leave this to me."
Suzaku and the girl were heading towards the place where the ceremony would take place.
On the way, the girl was attacked by enemies several times, but Suzaku easily repelled them.
Furthermore— there was something more worrisome.
What appeared before him should be called a monster, and Suzaku was half-convinced that this was a dream.
(If this is a dream, how do I wake up? No... what awaits me when I wake up from this dream is—)
Euphemia's bloodstained form crossed his mind.
As Suzaku unconsciously shook his head in denial, a woman appeared out of nowhere with a sneering smile.
"Having trouble, young man?"
The woman with dark brown skin and hair the color of a dull rose saw Suzaku and the girl and laughed.
"Who are you?"
"I'm a fortuneteller with hair the color of cinders. I'll tell your fortune for free, to celebrate our encounter."
Saying that, the fortuneteller's eyes narrowed.
"... Ah, I see it. Young man, your weakness will certainly destroy you."
"... Excuse me?"
"That was a prophecy. If you really want to stop it from happening, you have to recognize your own weakness. And I know. The truth of what you call killing..."
Leaving Suzaku dumbfounded, the fortuneteller disappeared like smoke.
-
Part 2
The fortuneteller's words weighed heavily on Suzaku's mood.
The shrine maiden sympathized with him and began to brightly speak of her circumstances.
The girl spoke of how she longed for people's stories, how she confided in the young chief priest, "I would like to dedicate my dance not for the sake of my mission, but for the sake of my loved ones."
The girl's ideals and fondness filled her smile, and reminded Suzaku somewhat of his lady.
"... That's right. You should dance like you believe in yourself."
"Right! Well then, let's be off!"
The girl turned and began to run towards the ritual site.
However, a large amount of monsters appeared there.
"Where did these guys come from?!"
"No! Suzaku! You can't attack them!"
"Why?! Aren't these monsters?!"
"That's right, but it's wrong. These people are—"
"Eh—? That... can't be."
"Don't kill her! My older sister's in there!"
In the end, Suzaku massacred all of the monsters at the ritual site without discretion.
"Staying here is dangerous. Let's run!"
Carrying the dumbfounded girl in his arms, Suzaku began running into the forest.
But—
Slap, a good and satisfying sound rang out as Suzaku's face was smacked.
"Eh...?"
Looking over, the girl he was carrying in his arms was crying her eyes out, glowering at Suzaku.
(Ah, she slapped me didn't she)
As he guessed this, pain flashed through his cheek and he registered reality.
-
Part 3
"Even though I told you to stop..."
The girl glared at Suzaku with bright red eyes as she sobbed.
"Why did you kill my older sister?!"
She denounced Suzaku right in front of him, demanding an answer like spitting blood.
"... For the sake of protecting you, it couldn't be helped. In that situation, I had to determine whether I could save your older sister—"
"I don't want to hear your sound reasoning!"
A black mist began gathering around the girl who had escaped Suzaku's arms.
"Why... why, why?!"
As she screamed, the girl turned into a monster before Suzaku's very eyes.
" I w a n t e d t o p r o t e c t t h e m . . . m y o l d e r s i s t e r , a n d e v e r y o n e e l s e . "
" A n d y e t , y o u k i l l e d t h e m a l l ! "
"No! I was trying to protect you—"
" T h e r e ' s n o p o i n t i n s u r v i v i n g b y m y s e l f . "
" I w a n t e d t o p r o t e c t e v e r y o n e ! "
Burying the girl who had become a monster, Suzaku collapsed to his knees.
"Is this reality after all...?"
"That's right. What you killed was a Nightmare."
Lifting his head at the familiar words, there stood the fortuneteller who had given him the ominous prophecy.
"That was... a Nightmare?"
"It's different from what you know, huh."
"What was that prophecy you gave me before?"
"Ah, that thing where your weakness is going to destroy you?"
"I... got stronger. Moreso from that time."
"I don't know what time that is, but it's best to just accept it. Otherwise—"
"You'll be swallowed up."
"Eh...?"
As the fortuneteller spoke those words, something passed behind her.
"Euphie?!"
The person that Suzaku wanted to protect and had pledged his loyalty to as a knight.
And his beloved that he had held feelings for—
That was the late princess's figure just now.
-
Part 4
Nightmares—
They weren't the machines Suzaku knew very well and piloted; rather, they meant something closer to bad dreams.
The amount of people becoming Nightmares increased, as if the girl had been the catalyst.
Unable to endure the murders happening one by one in front of him, Suzaku swung his sword, but they were killed before he could help them, and those he saved became Nightmares themselves.
"I can't do anything with my power!"
This helplessness.
Keenly aware of this, now an old person was struck down in front of Suzaku.
"Stop!"
Unable to ignore his cries for help, Suzaku ran to the old person.
" K i l l . . . k i l l , k i l l ! "
"Calm down! You used to be a human being—"
" G a . . . G a a a a a a a a a h ! "
"I knew it, I can't talk to them like this..."
"Damn it!"
"T-Thank you. You're my savior!"
The old person he had saved hadn't become a Nightmare and offered him a prayer of gratitude.
Seeing that old person safe, Suzaku's heart was saved a little.
(If you become a Nightmare, there's no turning back)
If that's the case, that girl and her sister—
(... It couldn't be helped)
Those who became monsters had no reason, they were no longer human, attacked everyone, and caused disaster.
(If that's the case, then I—)
Suzaku swears in his heart to take up his sword for the weak.
-
Part 5
"This is all your fault!"
A young man suddenly yelled, attacking Suzaku.
"You?!"
"Why did you kill the shrine maiden?! Even though she wished for the peoples' happiness!"
With those words, Suzaku guessed in that instant.
This young man was probably the chief priest the girl had mentioned.
"... It can't be helped. It couldn't be helped. She became a Nightmare."
"You made her do that!"
"No! I tried to help her!"
"But you killed her!"
"Once someone becomes a Nightmare, they're no longer human. Surely you know that? If I had let her be, more people would've died."
"Yeah, I know that. What you did was right. People will praise you for it. But do you understand what killing someone precious does to someone?!"
The chief priest's shout struck Suzaku's heart.
(... Euphie, I...)
"Even though there might have been a way to turn her back to normal... Shrine maiden, shrine maiden...!"
A black mist slowly covered the chief priest who was howling with fury.
" W h y d i d y o u k i l l . . . w h y d i d y o u k i l l h e r . . . "
"— If I had left her like that, she would've killed other people!"
"W h a t ' s w r o n g w i t h t h a t ? ! T h e r e a r e m a n y m o r e l i v e s — I l o n g e d t o b e c l o s e t o j u s t o n e p e r s o n , I j u s t w a n t e d t o s a v e h e r ! I s t h a t w r o n g a s a h u m a n ? ! "
Suzaku looked at his sword in half-dazed state, the corpse of the chief priest who had loved the dead shrine maiden dearly in front of him.
The blade of his sword was wet and red with the blood of the things he had killed.
(Since that day, both of my hands have been soaked in red.)
— Yes, from when he was very young, trying to stop his father from escalating the war.
And then—
(Now my entire body is... covered in blood)
How many would you say you've killed for the sake of saving people?
How many people's desires have you trampled?
"Aa... aaaaaaaaaaaa!"
Suzaku screamed, overflowing with unending repentance.
"... It's okay."
A soft voice gently fluttered down.
"It's okay, Suzaku. You can still start over."
A slender, white finger slowly stroked Suzaku's tear-stained cheek.
"Euphie...?"
When he called the name of his lady that should've been dead, she smiled sweetly.
(No, Euphie's dead. But this is...)
"I accept you entirely."
The voice that Suzaku never thought he'd hear again was familiar.
"So you should start over together with me."
That smile full of affection is no different from when she was alive.
(— This is probably an illusion)
And yet Suzaku's fingers reach towards Euphie.
At that moment, just for a moment, the fortuneteller's words rang in Suzaku's ears.
"Your weakness will certainly destroy you."
(... Ah, but I—)
"Yes, Your Highness."
Suzaku knelt in front of Euphemia, holding out his sword...
-
" I t ' s over? E h ? S e r i o u s l y ? "
" I s n ' t i t natural t o end i t t h e r e — ! "
" N o . I t w i l l continue i n t h e next cour."
" A h , it's split cour? T h a n k g o o d n e s s ~ "
" I f t h e r e ' s s o m e t h i n g abnormal w i t h t h e world lately, just d e s t r o y your enemies."
" T h e r e i s n o solution."
"'Salvation' i s w h a t y o u need to carry out."
" W h a t h a p p e n s w h e n y o u d o n ' t g e t salvation?"
" T h e loop c o n t i n u e s o n f o r eternity."
" T h a t i s t o m y liking."
" F o r t h e sake o f salvation, w e m u s t live i n t h e happiness o f lies."
" T h e weak man c r e a t e d this loop."
"Crash! And some change is n e c e s s a r y . "
" H o w e v e r , i s n ' t t h a t s u p e r f i c i a l t h i n g i r r a t i o n a l ? "
" I ' l l s h o w y o u his past f o r n o w , p l e a s e t h i n k o f c o u n t e r m e a s u r e s . "
" A n d w i t h t h a t , o n t o t h e next cour!"
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So beyond excited to see the marriage dialogue come this much closer to fruition!! Aaaaaaaaaaaa
Thank you!!! Here’s another progress report bc I just got this update:
Seems that the mod actually is complete! :D The problem is that the marriage dialogue will be pretty buggy and repetitive if anyone tries to play with it now. I don’t wanna release something that I know won’t work well (because I’m not a AAA game dev company lmao), so I’ll post an official update on Nexus as soon as the SMAPI bug is fixed!
In the meantime, you can take a look at the dialogue here. ;)
#cosmogyral-delirium#i'll take that file down when i can upload the official version!#i'm so relieved that it's not an issue w the mod itself omg#so it's outta my hands till SMAPI gets foxed#*fixed
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C3AFA Jakarta 2017
( this was so hard to work on I swear I have the worst memory)
Oh fun fact this was all actually broadcasted on Nico Nico, both panel and concert! (I think for the panel it was, but I’m definitely sure about the concert)
I came to the anifest for the anime.
Specifically the utaites 😏
There was also f'hana, Suzuki Konomi, May'n, and Usagi, but I’m not too familiar with them lol so I won’t write about them.
Also I’ll be writing about what they said to the audience but my Japanese isn’t… Perfect. I can understand it sometimes, but reading and writing is… Not good.
S O R R Y.
Also because this was held in Indonesia I’ll be using Indonesian words when they spoke it, but in brackets I’ll put the English. I’ll also recap a few personally funny things that happened to me, specifically with my cousin that I brought along. (She isn’t even in a fandom, and doesn’t even know what utaites are)
NOW LET’S GO. (WARNING: LONG POST)
I could only attend one day (Saturday), because of something I like to call hell school. Which I’m kind of sad about since Kradness is performing the second day and well, he’s the first utaite I’ve ever listened too. I’d go but there’s no way I’d be allowed to miss school Hahah :^)
The anifest exhibition, filled with little booths selling cute drawings, keychains, and a whole lot of Yuri on Ice yaoi. Official (?) booths include: Black Butler, Fate Apocalypse, some others I’m sure, but most were fan-run (?) booths. (I bought a set of Koi Yuri on Ice keychains that were adorable lol)
Of course that’s not what I came for. I came for the anisong concert.
Specifically Tomohisa Sako.
The event began at 10:00 am. I arrived at 2:30 and bought the VIP tickets. To my dismay, T-kun had an autograph session at 12:30.
U N L U C K Y
To be fair was on the plane. Yes jakarta is not where I live. I live in another city boohoo. Flew out but missed autographs.
And since I arrived late to purchase the tickets, the closest seats were row N. But at least had wasn’t in the standing area hahahahah. (Those who stood for three hours at the very back sorrymasen.)
There was about five hours until concert doors opened. What can you do for five hours??
I took a look at the schedule.
Wait. What’s this?
At 3:30 pm the beginning of nico nico panel!!? (Mind you I didn’t know this was happening.) I only came for the concert. This was great, I had some way to spend the time while waiting for the concert doors to open.
But who was performing? Was it anyone I knew? YES IT WAS.
Natsushiro Takaaki, Eve, and CleaNero (Clear and Nero.)
L U C K Y.
I was so excited I stood in front of the small open stage thirty minutes early. Also because I wanted to be at the front. Then it happened. It begun. The crowd started to thicken.
Anytime nico nico was mentioned me and a few other girls screamed like mad.
(No pictures cause obviously they’re forbidden)
I think the only downside of this short panel was that the time between each performance was really long XD. We had to wait around half an hour more or less for the next performer to come up. But they did provide entertainment in the middle of that wait.
Usagi was the first performer. She sang a song that I know the melody of but not the words or the title. (Shazam didn’t help either)
After her was my dear dear dearest Ikemennnnnnnnnnnn NATSUSHIRO TAKAAKI. He looked so good and ugh it was just amazing like how can someone be so cool lol. He came up on stage and pulled out a piece of paper. (a recurring theme.)
“Selamat siang! (Good afternoon)” he said. Or tried to say, but he was cute for trying. “Nama saya Takaaki Natsushiro. (My name is Takaaki Natsushiro.)” he struggled to say it but we were patient. I was grinning so hard because him trying was so adorable. (”Ganbatte!” the crowd shouted in encouragement)
Then he proceeded to speak in Japanese. “Do you understand Japanese?” he asked first.
“We do!” the crowd, and me, answered. His smile grew like a little puppy as he complimented us it was amazing. (and adorable, they all were so dorky aa)
Okay here is where I apologize. I don’t remember any of the songs he sang. I KNOW I’M TERRIBLE BUT SERIOUSLY MY MIND BLANKED OUT. (I kept staring at his face I guess lol that’s not a valid excuse.)
I think. THINK. He sang: 世界の真ん中を歩く(sekai no mannaka wo aruku)
BUT He was so enthusiastic as well, always getting the crowd to shout with the song, or clap our hands. (My cousin’s comment: How can he sing so perfectly while jumping?) ALSO DID I MENTION HOW STYLISH HIS OUTFIT WAS? HE WAS WEARING WHITE CLOTHES AND IT WAS WAS WAS COOLLLL.
He seriously looks like the drawings of him. Like with long white coat-thing with black underneath. And of course, a smile all the time. SO CUTE AGHHH
If anyone who was there knows any of the songs he sang please tell me ww I need help.
Fun fact: during the performance I was looking at him then in the far corner I saw a guy wearing a mask. I stared for three seconds before almost, ALMOST shouting, “EVE.”
Eve was watching the performance from a door to backstage it was so cute ww.
A N D
Eve was also the next performance. There was this one girl who seriously loved him, she kept shouting ‘kakkoi or kawaii’ when he came on stage ww and throughout the performance. So since no photos are allowed I have their faces branded into my brain haha. Okay but. Eve looks exactly like his avatar. Like the hair, the body shape, etc. I was gushing over it for the entire performance. He was wearing this blue patterned shirt with a floral jacket-thing over it, I think the pants matched the jacket. Why are Japanese people so stylish???
Now the performance. Not in correct order but he sang:
ユニバース (Universe)
スパークル(Sparkle from Your Name/Kimi no Nawa.)
惑星ループ (Wakusei Loop)
Now this cute boy also pulled out that fated paper. He stared at it sometime, trying to pronounce the first few syllables.
“Se- Sela? se se... (G- Goo? G-Good...)” he kept trying, eventually people starting shouting in encouragement but he held his hand out like ‘please be quiet I must focus.’
He then said it properly (well kind of). “Selamat siang! (Good afternoon)” When we cheered in response he looked so relieved that he had done it w. After that he sang another song. The poor boy was starting to get sweaty, and when he ended the song we could see he was really out of breath. To play it off adorably he panted into the microphone. “Haah haah, it’s hot...” he said (In japanese). (Cue squeals, it was so adorable.) And then he asked for a towel.
While waiting for the towel he decided to speak a little to us, albeit in Japanese. He said, “before I came on stage I was really nervous!” (That’s what I think he sort of said. Could be wrong) We all aww-ed and someone yelled (in Japanese) for him not to be nervous, which he obviously in turn replied with a thank you.
I felt so sorry for my poor sweaty boy, and they didn’t have any towels to give him, so I half-jokingly told my cousin that I wanted to throw him some tissues. (She then kept trying to take my tissues and throw them upstage. I WAS IN THE FRONT ROW I SWEAR HE COULD SEE THIS HAPPENING IT WAS VERYYY EMBARRASSING.)
During Universe he got us to sing along to the ‘woah woah yeah yeah’ parts in the song, and during the instrumental breaks the crowd was shouting like, ‘HEY HEY HEY.” It was really nice.
Wakusei Loop started playing and I screamed because I love that song. Immediately the crowd goes ‘ tuttururuttu ruttutturu’ along with the song. And some rhythmic clapping during choruses/ instrumentals.
When he left the stage I got so sad jeez. But i remembered that there was still CLEANERO.
I mean, there was two of them! Both, one package. Win win right?
And they ran up on stage, instead of having that little paper scene, they went straight into the first song.
The songs they sang (that I remember) are:
Butterfly
Cotton Candy Cloud
That One Song That Goes ‘Lalalalala’ And They Got The Crowd to Sing With Them. (Aka idk)
And I’m sure there were more but I forgot song
But the thing about Clear and Nero is: THEIR HARMONIES. They are so beautiful i felt like shedding a tear seriously. It was like the heavenly voices came down to bless me on that anime day.
But these two knew how to interact with fans more while performing. Although Nero more than Clear. They always stood on the front and one time Nero pointed at at an audience member while singing.
But after two songs they took a break, and the paper came out. Clear was cackling while Nero tried to pronounce the words. He did so pretty well actually.
“Selamat siang (good afternoon) Jakarta!” he yelled, which in reply we cheered, but then he handed the paper to Clear, who stopped laughing as soon as he realized what he had to do.
Clear said the exact same thing as Nero, but with stuttering and a heavy accent.You could tell he was really embarrassed, especially when some of us giggled. Luckily MOST of us were very encouraging and cheered for him instead.
After they were done I headed to the main stage where the concert was being held.
That’s when I entered and realized, “Oh no it started already?!?”
I swear they began early. So we headed to out seats and May’n was performing. While she was singing my cousin pointed to the poster-thing, where the performers were lined up in this order from bottom to top:
Tomohisa Sako
May’n
Konomi Suzuki
f’hana
She told me that if it was in the order of the pictures then that would mean that T-kun already performed. CUE PANIC. I tried to stay calm and enjoy the show but my mind was going a quadrillion miles per hour thinking of what would be of my life if I had indeed missed Tomohisa perform.
May’n finished and left the stage and I sat down while waiting for the next performer to come up. We were sitting there staring at the screen playing advertisements when it flashed and in very loud volume it played:
COMING UP NEXT: TOMOHISA SAKO
I SCREAMED SO LOUDLY AND TEARED UP. SERIOUSLY. MY HEART EXPLODED AND I JUST FELT LIKE AAAAAAAAAAAA IT WAS PURE BLISS HOLY CRAP.
T-kun ran onto stage, and the girls were deafening. I tried to calm myself but how could I?!?! HOW COULD I?!?
T-kun sang many songs, but instead of listing them I’ll go through them.
(Although maybe not in correct order.)
So he sang Renai Saiban (Love Trial) and it reminded me of the little medley he did with Amatan and I was singing along like a little bird that doesn’t really know all the lyrics ww.
He sang Mezase Pokemon Master and mad us shout that pikachu part LIKE FIVE TIMES. HE EVEN CALLED OUT SOMEONE. “Ahh... You only! You only, okay?” he said in english. It was cute and I was SO JEALOUS OF THAT PERSON.
He sang Get a Ban Ban and I THINK I JUMPED ALL MY FAT AWAY WHILE SINGING WITH HIM BECAUSE I WAS SO ENERGETIC.
Sugar Song and Bitter Step. At the beginning he trailed off one of the lyrics and twirled his finger at the audience... Thinking about it still makes my heart beat aa it was wonderful.
He sang Floria and I felt a little nostalgic since I haven’t listened to that song in awhile it was so nice. T-kun really is cute and sweet...
And he sang Blue Bird!! I SWEAR THE CROWD WAS THE MOST ENERGETIC FOR THIS SONG, I SWUNG MY LIGHTSTICK AROUND UNTIL I FELT LIKE MY ARM WAS GOING TO FALL OFF.
Some other things that happened.
Him trying so hard to speak in Indonesian. While he was trying someone in the crowd yelled, “ T-kun daisuki!” and he was startled and replied, “a~a~ arigato!”
He told us, “Saya makan nasi goreng. Enak sekali. (I ate fried rice. It was really good.)”
Then he asked us what foods we liked, and my cousin shouted, “INDOMIE!” (Instant noodles ww) I swear the people by us were cracking up.
Seriously my boy was so pure and I had so much fun I just felt so blessed the entire time ww.
IKEMEN BOYSSSS <3
I want to follow them forever!
(I want to translate the footage of T-kun’s performance but I must brush up on my Japanese ww. I can do the Indonesian. Hopefully I can though.)
C3 ANIFEST WAS AMAZING I MISS THEM SO MUCH. I WANT TO WATCH MORE OF MY UTAITE BABIES I HOPE THEY CONTINUE COMING TO INDONESIA!!
#utaite#natsushiro takaaki#eve#usagi#nero#clear#cleanero#concert recap#tomohisa sako#shounen t#T-kun#jakarta
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