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bixels · 2 months

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So i have a small nicpic i wanted to share with you about your interpretation of spike in the au and i want to make two things clear before i talk

1) i havent watch the series for a little while as of now so i might be misnterpreting a aspect of this chatacter that might have never been there and only apeared in fan content and personal interpretation (since that whats been keeping me on the fandom)

2) this is not a big problem about the au i matured enough to not get angry at a interpretation of a fictional charater

Now here i go

I feel spike being the same race as the rest of his familie makes him lose a part of his character that might have not been central but was still something interesting about him and is the idea of not mayhering how diferent he looked from his adoptive family (and his cominty as a whole) he was he was still seen as part of it

Again this isnt a big problem with the au as a whole its just a small nicpic that i have about the au and its not going to make me hate the au

This was just my opinion that i wanted to share and im interested to know your opinion about what i said

I understand this criticism and agree that having Simon/Spike be a different race than Thea could speak to their relationship in the original show.

My reasoning for designing them both to be African American is this. I believe Simon's adoption is enough to explore the feelings of separation and exclusion he may have with Thea and her family. The original show doesn't bring up Twilight and Spike's racial differences much because they originally didn't consider Spike to be a part of Twilight's family. As far as I know, there's no moment where someone says, "Wow! You're telling me you're related to Twilight Sparkle? But you look nothing alike!" because Spike was more so Twilights... familiar than anything.

Later episodes that explore their familial dynamic poses the conflict through Spike's adoption. There's one episode where Spike's "biological father" returns, and Spike accuses Twilight of not being his real family, which breaks her heart. There's another that delves deep into Spike's feelings of exclusion from Twilight and Shining Armor's siblinghood. Basically, in discussions of family dynamics, the show places more emphasis on Spike's identity as an adopted sibling rather than a dragon.

I really do believe a multiracial family would be good representation, but the racial dynamics would not be something I'd be interested in getting into. That's not to say I find real multiracial families problematic or uninteresting or unappealing or unimportant. I just wouldn't be interested in having to explain in-text that Simon (non-black) and Thea (black) are related over and over; it would grow tedious. It adds an extra level of writing complication and opens up racial discourse (discourse that I feel is unrelated to their relationship in the original show) that I don't want to concern myself with, especially because I have no experience in navigating such discourse.

#ask me #anon #i hope this makes sense #tldr i think having human twilight + spike be different races is a good idea #but the decision to do that would complicate their relationship in ways the og show didn't regard #and would start in-universe racial discourse that i don't think is necessary to get into #i think the struggle is a valid and real struggle. but i personally don't have much to say about the social politics of multiracial familie #because i know nothing about what it's like to be in one #also you can 100% bring up moments that touched on race/multiracialness between twilight and spike in the show #because i know they're there #there's a lot of casual racism in the show overall #but it's not something i'd want to explore in this particular au #it's not a conflict that i think is necessary between twilight and spike #but you're more than welcome to disagree

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cubbyhole-for-flea-bee · 2 months

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i have learned what shadowpeach is! and i think its hilarious

sun+moon coded, friends-to-enemies-to-?????? duo is so interesting i wanna put them under a microscope

#lmk #lego monkie kid #six eared macaque #monkey king #sun wukong #fanart #shadowpeach #...i may end up drawing more lmk fanart that is mostly this dude #fights between these two could be very funny #cuz they don't *actually* wanna set back their reconciliation so they gotta hold tails after #but if u think u saw that no u didn't mind ya bizznizz #(im ignoring how with a relationship this complicated they could also be Unpleasantly Violent And Emotional)#be very funny if mac's taller but people don't realize cuz wukong's floof goes that high #the fact that macaque is a shady (HOHO :D) antagonist what got sucked into the found family AND a theatre kid has made him one of my faves #is he actually running/participating in local theatre on the side i NEED to know #is it just shadowplays or does he like rent it out to other productions too that he can watch #i wanna see him react to hadestown and/or shakespeares tragedies being the only 1 in the room who doesn't know #like imagine watching romeo+juliet and when it hits the scene where mercutio bites it flabbergasted monkey screeches erupt from the back ro

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haunted-xander · 7 months

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You ever think about how Ryne probably got a more honest yet closed-off Thancred while Minfilia got a more disingenuine yet open Thancred?

Like, the Thancred Minfilia knew and grew up with was the one we saw in arr, the flirty, teasing and sassy but friendly man who was clearly not very honest seeing as no one- not even Minfilia- noticed how worn out he was from his constant work. Even just by hw he's noticably more prickly and. not quite rude but. more outwardly cynical? He's always been kinda cynical, but in arr his teasing and banter hides it well, which never disappears but is more. natural? genuine? now. Krile directly points out that he's much more brusque than she expected of him based on how Minfilia described him.

And sure, you could attribute that behaviour to his grief and stress (which is certainly a part of it) but considering he acts much the same in ew, when he's finally moved on and come to terms with everything (and is also post-shb character development), I think it's safe to say that this is the most honest we've seen Thancred be.

But this is all Ryne has known him to be. She's never seen Thancred be flirtatious or as social and friendly as he is in arr, she's only seen him be brusque and cynical but still teasing and kind. But he's also far more closed off from her (and others) bc of That Whole Deal going on. Urianger has told her more about Thancred's true feelings than Thancred himself has. and even that's not a lot, for Urianger is not only not a mind reader and doesn't know everything that goes on on Thancred's head, but also is reluctant to share more than is necessary since it's not his place to divulge these things (and also he himself is not free from the folly of emotional self-isolation).

With Minfilia though, he's open enough that she's never doubted that he cared for and loved her even when he couldn't spend much time with her, and she felt comfortable enough to admonish him when he did his usual self-destructive behaviour (you know, becoming an alchoholic at 17 and All That Entails)

Just. food for thought

#theres a lot of these parallels between ryne & minfilia in regards to their relationship with thancred #like. the way things are so similar yet so *different* from each other #same same but opposite ya know #like how thancred blames himself for warburtons death and by extention minfilia being orphaned even tho it was in no way his fault #vs how he knowingly took ryne away from ran'jit bc he knew that whatever other life shed live would be better than what she had #when minfilia first experienced the echo thancred knew wat it was but didnt tell her (for circle of knowing related reasons)#whereas he told ryne everything he could in regards to her powers and circumstances #he gifted minfilia her dagger for self-defense but never taught her how to fight #but ryne was not only gifted daggers by him but also taught how to properly fight and fend for herself with them #and he trusted minfilia in the main care of f'lhaminn while he took a more secondary support role #but he assigned himself the primary caretaker for ryne while the others (read: urianger) became secondary ones #(granted due to rynes situation he kinda had no other choice at the time)#(but im sure he wouldve taken the same role even if he could theoretically have safely handed her over to someone else)#also just to be clear thancred IS genuinely social and friendly even hw & up #just not as extroverted #he spends a lot of time either by himself or with fellow scions/other close companions #rather than with whatever lady hes trynna impress next #anyway. yet another day of being Completelt Normal about this complicated family situation #thancred waters #ryne waters #minfilia warde #final fantasy #final fantasy 14 #final fantasy xiv #ff14 #ffxiv #xander rambles #xander being insane about ryne

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margareturtle · 1 month

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All is well nothing’s wrong just thinking about Jocelyn seeing Clary and Ash standing together from behind and just letting out a lil tear bc of what could’ve been but was lost bc of valentine

#jocelyn and clary and ash bonding is a need #if it doesn’t happen in twp then what’s the point #like yeah I’m here for the romance #but I’m even MORE here for the parabatai and complicated familial relationships #that’s where it’s at #the wicked powers #the mortal instruments #the shadowhunter chronicles #clary fairchild #jocelyn fairchild #ash fairchild morgenstern

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spacemoth-matt · 7 months

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I know the doctor was grieving rose in s3 but come on my guy you did not need to treat martha like that like she walked the earth for a year for you + the entirety of the family of blood, she should've run him over with the tardis after that honestly

#don't get me wrong i love the doctor #but he can se such an ass sometimes #his story after rose is one of grief and loss and although he does tell martha what he's going through #some of the things the does (looking at you the family of blood) are just WAY too bad #i have a complicated relationship with that episode #it's interesting but oh dear does she get treated horribly #martha jones #doctor who #dw #tenth doctor

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cienie-isengardu · 7 months

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Bi-Han/Sub-Zero in Mortal Kombat 1 (2023)

Asharat: What kind of son betrays his father? Bi-Han: One who sees his father's time has passed.

Kuai Liang/Sub-Zero in Mortal Kombat 11 (2019)

Sub-Zero: Come and join the Lin Kuei. Jade: Outworld needs me, Sub-Zero. Sub-Zero: Do not let loyalty stunt your growth.

Frost in Mortal Kombat 11 (2019)

Jax: Thought the Lin Kuei were like family? Frost: Family only ever held me back.

BONUS: NOOB SAIBOT in Mortal Kombat (2019)

Noob Saibot: What did I always tell you? Sub-Zero: To never trust anyone. Noob Saibot: Least of all family.

#mortal kombat #sub zero #bi han #kuai liang #noob saibot #frost #cryomancers #lin kuei #lin kuei cryomancers have complicated family relationship #i love them but damn #there is something interesting between mk1 bi han and sub zero and frost from mk11 #kuai liang says don't let loyalty to stunt your growth #bi han let their father to die so he (lin kuei) could grew stronger / independent #because father “lacked vision” - and by that he hold bi-han back from changing into what sub-zero thought he should be #frost too thought family hold her back and she betrayed kuai liang to grow stronger herself / for her ambitions #Bi Han & Frost & Kuai Liang have some interesting parallels between them #both did not let loyalty (to family / clan) stop them from advancing in what they thought was growth #but also the bitter statement to not trust anyone least of all family #when even kuai liang's advice is about not letting loyalty to stunt your growth #i love cryomancers but they all are messed up

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cakemoney · 3 days

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riz is the child of sklonda who is dating gorthalax who is the father of fig whose mom is sandra lynn who is dating jawbone who adopted adaine (and aelwyn by extension i guess) and also jawbone's daughter's ex-girlfriend who lives with him is kristen and also fig's other dad gilear is dating hallariel whose son is fabian. and then there's gorgug, who i'm sure thanks various sundry gods every day that neither his adopted nor his biological parents have any relation to any of his classmates

#laughs awkwardly #dimension 20 #fantasy high spoilers #kind of. aksmdflkamsdlfkmslmdk #started drawing a relationship chart and was just like man. what the hell #but also there's like a. you know in freshman year kalvaxus was the one who killed riz's dad and riz was friends with one of the maidens #and then in sophomore year kalina is involved with riz's backstory and adaine's whole family is super involved with stuff #and just kind of in general fabian and fig and kristen have a ton of complicated shit going on with their family every year #i feel like frosty fair was the first time gorgug's home life has really been significantly involved in the plot #and literally just twenty minutes of that and gorgug couldn't stand it anymore he's like everyone get the fuck out ksdmflskmd

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bumblingbabooshka · 10 months

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Post Voyager returning to the alpha quadrant there’s definitely (in my heart) an unofficial club where the spouses/loved ones of her ex-crew gather to talk about how different and fucked up the experience made them, both of them in some cases. There’s also an official one but many of them don’t want to talk to a professional since Voyager is a media circus and they either don’t want more spotlight, are afraid of things leaking to the press, or are just uncomfortable talking to someone who might potentially idolize the person they’re talking about. (some of them share their experiences of this happening even amongst family or friends). A lot of talk of divorce, a lot of feeling trapped in relationships (a breakup would now be at LEAST semi-public and again it might prompt a lot of negativity - YOU broke up with a HERO? or speculation about the person they love[d] not to mention just general feelings of guilt). But there’s also a lot of funny (at least to them) stories, tears, venting, community. Also maybe to lighten the mood Quark’s there trying to get them plastered.

#st voyager #Mark goes even though he's not married to Janeway (T'Pel convinced him)#<- I wonder a LOT about Mark & T'Pel and their relationship before & after Voyager disappears.#Janeway seems to have been VERY close to Tuvok's entire family - not just the man himself. Was Mark the same? Or did Voyager's disappearance #bring them closer...unexpected friendship!#*married to or romantically involved with Janeway #A lot of people are actually glad to see Mark bc they also moved on while their loved one was on Voyager and they can share that complicated #sense of relief - joy and guilt #T'Pel goes to every meeting but rarely speaks #<- what's the story there??? people wonder

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amaraudermind · 1 year

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Something something Bruce love Gotham because it's his home, jason loves Gotham because it's in his soul, Duke loves Gotham because it's his family, Steph loves Gotham on purpose

#the void screams #duke thomas #bruce wayne #jason todd #stephanie brown #each member of the batfam having a complicated relationship with gotham is something that can be so personal-#but yeah bruce loves gotham because this is where his family has always lived. leaving would mean leaving them behind.#he loves gotham because it's the only home he's ever known #i don't know what fucked up tether there is between gotham and jason. compells me though.#even when he leaves he can't stay away along. gotham's in his head. in his soul. it's where he's alive and it's where his life is drained #the people of gotham are duke's family and he wants to protect them the way they've always tried to protect him #the city is the people and duke knows these people. he's one of them. he's seen what they go through to survive because #he goes through it too. he loves gotham because it's his whole world. his family. and he'll protect that family #until he dies.#steph though? steph grew up here and hated it. hated the city. resented the people. resented the heroes.#and still every fibre of her being goes into loving this city. into hoping for it.#on purpose. she's going to love this city on purpose. even when it hurts. even when she'd rather die.#even when the whole CITY turns against her. time and again. because she's already decided.#she's going to love gotham. even if gotham never loves her back.#don't mind me i am just rambling nonsensically. i am right though by the way. it doesn't make sense but it's Correct

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visenyaism · 1 year

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Visneya with grandbaby Aly just makes me think of the scebe where Plankton tries to teach Spongebob to be less nice

alysanne daughter of maegor getting yelled at for bedazzling all the valyrian blood sacrifice daggers and putting flower crowns on the stone dragons while on the other end rhaenys is trying to convince her granddaughter rhaena the lesbian to go to harp lessons when she just wants to ask aunt visenya how to leverage her WMD to get a girlfriend. perfectly and miserably balanced

#this is what they took from us #asoiaf #it’s such a fun theme. wyd if ur kid turns out exactly like the family member you have the most complicated relationship with

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dayurno · 14 days

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#i will warn you only once: tsc spoilers #literally just finished it as i am drafting this its 5am where i live #so you may be subjected to some nonsense #that all being said i have thoughts.and feelings #the kevin was lovely and tasted delicious! jean defending him at every turn even when he swears to hell and back he'll kick his ass #the kevjean was surprising i was only half expecting that #the dog metaphors i have to say i need this one cashed in. nora run me my check #im joking of course dont quote me on it #jean taking kevins promise to the end and living on it is seriously so. well.#'be careful with him' 'take kevin's name out of your ignorant mouth' 'you promised me'#also kevin getting called the court's queen had me tender and on my back oml #jean's relationship with the trojans is sweet and he is very interesting and complicated #a character with many moving parts im sure #there were a few things i did not care for #namely jeremy and the trojans felt remarkably flat to me bar lucas (by far the most interesting) and catalina on occasion #i didnt quite enjoy jeremy's pov and felt like he spent perhaps way too much time worrying over jean? if that makes sense #i wish he had some more complexity to him or really anything to catch a hook on #all we know is hes attractive and smiley and gets along terribly with his family #so much of his character is sucked out by jean he didnt feel like much more than a plot device to me #which i wouldnt mind if jeremy wasnt the literal main character alongside jean #i was living for everything jean thought but had to drag myself through jeremy's pov if im honest #uuuuh what else. neil! funny. deranged. i have to love him #andrew couldnt give less of a fuck about jean which is funny as all fuck #two bugs placed in the same habitat ignoring each other #the thing with elodie i thought was complicated. i wish we knew some more about her or that shed been mentioned a little earlier #but im assuming thats a topic to be revisited #uuuuuuuh yeah so thats most of it. i think my first thought and the one that sticked out the most to me is that the book felt remarkably #pedestrian #not necessarily in a bad way #it lacked to me one of the main appeals of aftg which were the numerous interesting side characters

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future-crab · 2 months

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I’m such a person who doesn’t care about blood relations that any time a storyline focuses on a character grappling with the realization that one of their relatives was evil and worrying that they’ll go down the same path it SUPER doesn’t resonate.

“The sins of the father will be passed down to his children” Skill issue. If I’ve got a problem with your shitty dad, I’m taking it up with your shitty dad.

#to be clear this isn’t about grappling with your complicity in or the ways you benefited from that evil #“my life was made easy by the ways my family exploited others’ is absolutely an interesting thing to explore #but the whole ‘what if i inherited the Evil gene’ is just dumb #and the ‘our parents were enemies’ thing usually falls flat for me as well #though i know it can be done in interesting ways #anyway weirdly enough this was inspired by ppl talking about gwendolyn bouchard #i’ve seen ppl going ‘remember Elias wasn’t evil it was jonah so gwen’s surname doesn’t tell us anything about her morality’#and i’m like… her surname doesn’t tell us anything about her morality bc evil as a heritable trait isn’t real #like obviously she’s a character and characters are named very deliberately so her name is trying to tell us *something*#but when i hear people bring up elias vs jonah I feel like we’re maybe taking family relationships too seriously #(it’s not a big deal either way tbc it’s just what started me thinking)

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blimbo-buddy · 8 months

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With the way I want to rewrite PineStar's Choice, I want people to understand why PineStar has such a difficult time making a choice in the first place. Chelford is so kind to him, they're so sweet and patient and defensive of any cat, but, he grew up in the clans, it was hammered into his head that he was nothing without his clan. They were his family, and to the clans, your family defined you, your family is you.

He can't "just leave" because to him, in his mind, that was something that was absolutely unforgivable, he would be dead to his clan-his family- if he did that. The environment that he finds himself in is hostile, abusive, manipulative, exhausting, but it's the only life he knew, the only life he was taught to cherish and defend with his own body and blood. But it isn't his fault, it was never his fault. He's scared to leave.

#blimbo rambles #blimbo's pinestar's choice rewrite #wc #abuse mention #I really want to delve into PineStar's complicated relationship with Thunderclan and the clans as a whole #I want to explain why these cats can't 'just leave' from a mental standpoint if that makes sense #if you leave the clans. you are dead to them all #you will be treated as an enemy from then on #and what if you have family? close friends?#now the clans will teach them that you are now the enemy. you can never speak to them ever again #you can't even step foot into the forest ever again without the risk of being ambushed

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aeoris4lovers · 1 year

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(click here to read on ao3)

When all is said and done, when Trent is locked away and their stories are told and there is nothing left of their old lives that must be turned over to the world and Caleb and Astrid are finally settling into the newer pockets of their lives, Eadwulf runs.

He leaves Astrid in the misty grey hours of early morning as she sleeps soundly, her face settled into a content kind of faint smile that so rarely graces it at any other time. There are no goodbyes on that morning, no confession of where he might be going or plans for when to meet again. There is only the ghost of a kiss on a temple, so soft it can hardly be called a true touch at all, and an apology deep in his bones that he can’t risk saying aloud.

Before he goes, he makes breakfast for her. He covers the table in a spread of fruits and eggs and toast, leaves fresh coffee in a pot, all of it magically kept warm until she wakes and finds it. There are only so many comforts he can deny her at once.

He writes a note for her, too, and props against the coffee pot. It’s short — just enough to reassure her of his safety — and carefully avoids using any of the code words that would alert her to some sort of danger.

The first step out the door is an amputation, rough and gorey and in the absence of any fire that might cauterize it, and he stumbles out onto the street in that familiar haze which accompanies, as always, the bearing of some unbearable pain. There can be no way forward for him with things as they are, grafted as he has been for so long to her stronger trunk and left to grow only as she does, but the necessity of the action leaves him no less an open wound.

Lost in that fog clouding his mind, hardly present at all in his own skin, he finds himself not long after at the outskirts of a familiar graveyard. He doesn’t remember deciding to go there, doesn’t remember wanting to, certainly doesn’t remember the process of casting a spell to close the distance — but there he is nonetheless, and as he takes stock of his surroundings, he hears the unmistakable croak of a raven ring out from a nearby tree.

There should be no warmth for him in this place, really; nothing but barred doors and shuttered windows to greet him after what they had done to it. It’s still being rebuilt, still not yet a true temple again. What reason would these people have to welcome him?

But somehow, impossibly, they do.

Not without their hesitations, of course. No one in the family has forgotten their last meeting, least of all the familiar cleric who opens the door to answer Eadwulf’s clumsy knock. Immediately, the darkening of Caduceus’ face betrays his intention to shut the door again, but then he looks at Eadwulf with a gaze that seems to burn straight through his flesh and pierce his skull. Whatever Caduceus finds inside, it must be to his satisfaction because only a moment later, he opens the door wider and asks with a smile if Eadwulf would like a cup of tea.

And with Caduceus’ blessing, the rest of the family accepts him easily enough. They are clearly unsure of him at first, but he helps in the kitchen and volunteers to take on much of the heavy lifting for the repairs and doesn’t complain when the youngest Clay practically climbs him or excitedly shows him the strangest insect she found that day, and soon enough, his presence there almost starts to feel natural.

So, he stays a while. He helps where he can but does his best not to intrude on the family otherwise, quietly haunting the further reaches of the Grove and idly tending to the plants there until needed (or just invited) elsewhere. He leaves for a couple of days every once in a while, to be on his own and give them some space, but inevitably comes back when his business elsewhere is taken care of, usually with some small gifts for the Clays in hand. He stays for what must amount to quite a few months, judging by how his hair grows long enough to curl again and then even longer still, until it nearly brushes his shoulders. He loses track of the time easily in the secluded beauty of the Grove, though, and the changing of the seasons only rarely reminds him of its passing enough to worry that he might overstay his welcome.

Constance and Cornelius insist on making a place for him to sleep inside the house, but most nights he prefers to sleep under the stars, taking in the ever-present air of nature and divinity and gentle decay. When the nights grow colder and he conjures a dome for himself to keep warm, Clarabelle likes to follow him out and join him underneath it. Sometimes she approaches with blankets dragged behind her, to throw over the top of the dome and turn it into a magical blanket fort. Other times, if the sky is clear, she lays down next to him and they look up together, him occasionally pointing out a constellation to her and her connecting the stars into constellations of her own design.

One night, just as she steps out to join him, Colton emerges behind her and takes her arm, bending to whisper something in her ear. She stops for a moment, nodding slowly as she listens, but then brushes him off as though his words were utter nonsense and makes her way over, undeterred. Later that night, as the two of them lay beneath the stars, she props herself up on her elbow to face Eadwulf and says with a cheerful smile and a mischievous glint in her eye, “Colton says you’re dangerous, you know.”

The implications of the statement only momentarily take him aback. Of course Colton — and the others, no doubt — would still be wary of him, especially with Clarabelle getting so close without them around. Propping himself up to look her in the eye, he replies with a small nod and an affirmative hum, and she only smiles wider.

“Cool.” Then, she shrugs. “You seem nice to me, though.”

Hardly a second later, she’s leaping up and out of the dome to catch a passing firefly, and the matter doesn’t come up again.

As irresistible as Clarabelle’s strange kind of charm is, his greatest fascination is — and has been, ever since that dinner — with Caduceus. Caduceus, who looked Ikithon in the eye and spoke so ruthlessly and yet without a hint of venom in his voice, who got under the archmage’s skin in a way Eadwulf isn’t sure anyone had before and lived to tell the tale, who could be at once so fiercely protective of his friends and so unflinchingly at ease in the face of the one who hurt them. Countless times, Eadwulf asks him for advice on which tea to try or which flowers are okay to pick from or some other simple request, just as an excuse to strike up conversation and pick his brain about nearly anything. Caduceus’ advice and words of wisdom are the farthest things from a disappointment and his way of looking at life is so unfamiliar yet so full of steady conviction that it borders on intoxicating, but it’s his humor — sometimes intentional, oftentimes not — that Eadwulf finds himself seeking out the most.

Every so often, the tiefling comes to visit the Grove and have tea with Caduceus; the purple one, Kingsley. He always comes with an abundance of stories about his life on the high seas, and Eadwulf can’t help but be mesmerized by the theatrics of his retellings. One afternoon, Kingsley comes with a story about a battle against a demigod with the whole of the Mighty Nein there — with Caleb there — and for the first time, he listens unabashedly, not bothering to hide how he hangs onto every word of their adventures. The two of them share a tendency to steal away to the outskirts of the Grove when they need a moment to breathe, and they often find themselves crossing paths in those stretches of the gardens. On multiple occasions, during their talks out among the headstones, Kingsley takes note of Eadwulf’s interest in his tales and extends an offer to join his crew. On almost as many occasions, Eadwulf surprises himself with how seriously he considers accepting.

The drow, Essek, stops by from time to time as well. Their first meetings are more complicated; Essek is familiar on more than a few levels with the tendencies of the man Eadwulf once served, and was present to witness under no uncertain terms how Eadwulf had done his bidding. Eadwulf, in turn, knows precisely what roles Essek played, the subterfuge that served as the basis of his career and the betrayal he was capable of. They circle each other for some time, keeping their distance but making no secret of how closely they watch each other. His curiosity eventually gets the better of him, though, and he can’t help but take the opportunity to ask a few questions about the magic Essek wields. As it turns out, one of the quickest ways to Essek’s heart is through his mind, and he can’t seem to resist the temptation of a conversation about the technicalities of his craft.

The three of them turn out to be better and more comfortable companions than Eadwulf ever could have expected. They each understand, in their own way, the hectic confusion of being pulled so suddenly into a new life by the whirlwind that is the Mighty Nein, and Eadwulf soon realizes how desperately he needed someone to be able to tell him he isn’t just losing his mind in the midst of that chaos. Even aside from that, the trio is good company, each with their own kind of intelligence and wit and arsenal of ridiculous stories to share. Though he finds himself inexplicably nervous to admit it, they begin to feel more and more like true friends with each shared conversation. They are a strange group — the ex-assassin, the grave keeper, the pirate, and the fugitive — but the strangeness is far easier to let himself settle into than his attempts at normalcy ever had been. The best days are those when all four of them are there at once, each of them growing increasingly familiar with and invested in the lives of the others, and he comes to anticipate those rare occasions with an almost childlike excitement.

(Later on, after Eadwulf’s time living at the Blooming Grove comes to an end, Caleb will frequently and openly express his absolute bewilderment at how his ex-boyfriend, current boyfriend, crush, and friend became such close companions. They seem to all outside eyes to be an unlikely match, but if you ask Eadwulf, the Grove just has a way of bringing people together like that.)

And every day, without fail, a sending from Astrid prickles the back of his mind. He always answers, of course. He reassures her with each new morning of his safety, promises her that his absence is of his own free will and that he will be returning. The idea that he might ignore her for even a day is beyond unfathomable.

Even so, the ease with which he puts her messages out of his mind after responding catches him off guard. He thinks of her near constantly, as always, but the calm beauty of the Grove and the ease of the companionship found within it makes it strangely difficult to regret the separation. Even the deepest wounds, he supposes, must begin to clot. He only hopes hers has done the same.

In the many months he spends there, he never quite apologizes for what he did to the home the Clays are now so bafflingly willing to welcome him into. Not in so many words, at least. He only lends a hand where he can and tries as well as he knows how to bring, if anything, a bit more light to their home. And in truth, it feels as though the words are unnecessary. His words are too often clumsy when they hold that much weight; they would only cheapen the remorse.

Eventually, he does take his leave from the Blooming Grove. He leaves each of the Clays with a hug, a token of his gratitude made by hand, and a promise to come back and visit. It’s Clarabelle who hugs him the longest but Constance comes close, sending him off with all of the pleas to stay safe and other such fanfare that one might expect a mother to give her son.

(The question of why will never leave his mind, no matter how often or how long he turns it over in his mind. To allow him into their home was one thing, incomprehensible in itself, but to find any true care for him was another entirely. It must be like living in a different world, he thinks, to be nurtured by a place like that for your entire life. It must change you, make you different, make you kinder. He can find no other satisfactory explanation for how such people could come to exist at all.)

When he finally returns to Astrid’s house, he braces himself for the earful he knows is waiting for him there, but Astrid only throws her arms around him the moment she lays her eyes on him. For the rest of the night, she keeps him captive as she tells him everything that went on in his absence and demands the same from him, refusing to let him leave her sight for anything longer than a bathroom break. The next day, of course, she has far angrier words for him, and he takes them without a fight — he knows he deserves them, with the way he left her.

Later that month, when he receives the expected sending from Essek on Caleb’s behalf, he accepts the invitation and agrees to attend the Nein’s monthly get-together for the first time, as ready as he could ever be to face them all again. Astrid still declines the offer and he nearly changes his mind, lest he do any further damage by leaving her again even for a night, but to his surprise she all but pushes him out the door.

Caleb greets him at the tower’s entrance, looking him up and down and saying with a soft smile, “You look good.” It’s strange, hearing his own words reflected back at him. More than anything, it strikes him that he knows full well what sentiment underlies them:

You look healthy. You look cared for. You look like yourself. You look happy.

#this was Supposed to be an exploration of wulf and astrids very complicated relationship #and what happens when they’re apart for a long time for the first time like. ever #and it was going to be angsty™️#but then wulf decided to go to the grove and make some friends instead and who am i to say no to that?#sometimes the healing insists on happening i guess. good for him #my mind just cant stop rotating the way he zeroed in on cad and was like You. I Like You #you cant tell me that was a short lived fascination. i just know he was thinking about that dinner and cad in particular for A While #and then realizing That was the home they were burning down to get at caleb???#no way in hell he just walked away and forgot about it. no fucking way #cr fic #eadwulf grieve #astrid becke #caleb widogast #caduceus clay #kingsley tealeaf #essek thelyss #the clay family #blumenduo #blumendrei #the mighty nein #critical role #critical role fic

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