Staff meetings
I can't seem to track down the original source, I got this far though (x)
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I'd have loved to know what happened at the conformatorium the morning after this.
Warden Wrath: Now....if anyone asks, WHAT do we tell them?
Guard #1: It was an army! One hundred-no! TWO HUNDRED wild witches broke their way in here!
Guard #2: Each one as powerful as the Owl Lady, if not more!
Warden Wrath: AND?
Guard #2: We gave it to them as good as we got.
Guard #3: We slew each and every last one of them, no matter how many of us were defeated!
Guard #1: And THAT'S why the human was alone when she reached the Owl Lady. We DEFINITELY didn't all get beaten by a child.
Warden Wrath: Good.
Guard #3:....What do we tell Frank's family?
Warden Wrath: That he died honorably in battle.
Guard 1: Yeah! He may have went down, but he took over a dozen of the wild witches with him!
Guard #2: He did NOT get taken out in one shot and then slowly and pitfully freeze to death. Absolutely not what happened.
Warden Wrath: Excellent.
Guard #1:....Do you think that humans going to come back?
Warden Wraith: Titan, I hops not......
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You know what's really important about the epilogue?
Them.
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Why yes I am an EC mask appreciator. How correct of you to notice
Bonus engineer I somehow forgot
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“I just wanna see the floating lanterns gleam!”
no i’m not over the huntlow tangled au. hi.
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character hotness rankings are IN !!!!!!!!!!!!
belos: 10/10. literally nothing could convince me to lower that number. somehow all the sexualities at once. somehow both a top and bottom at once. attractive voice, relaxed demeanor, gorgeous hair. the evilness is a plus. (magical in its forbiddenality.)
titan: 10/10. absolutely feral for this big ass creature of a man. and DO i mean 'big ass'. could probably snap any of his partners like a twig. for those looking to get into metallurgy, ship him with belos for maximum heat. your standard bear.
piniet: 9.5/10. for those undiscerning viewers who might struggle to recall this individual - this was the hot evil lizard man from the fanfiction-book-writing episode. fucking obsessed with his voice and you just can't go wrong with lizards. your standard token scaly.
eda: 9/10. she's hot for sure, with an attractive voice and gorgeous hair as well. points off bc she gives too many shits about children. (possibly i like milfs only in theory, not in practice.) but she regains points bc of her harpy form. gawd dayum!
darius: 9/10. suffers much the same fate as eda, in that he's hot normally with an extra hot super form, but unfortunately he cares about kids. your standard gay hunk.
warden wrath: 8/10. hot af in the first episode. good banter with eda as well. points off since he becomes pathetic later on. your standard himbo.
bump: 7.5/10. just a touch too old for my tastes, but he has a great voice and is just generally pretty attractive. competent, too. solid man.
camila: 7/10. manny was a lucky man.
alador: 6.5/10. i like him more than his exwife but he doesn't care enough about his children. still, your standard moderately hot dilf.
salty: 6/10. again, no shade to those who don't remember. this was the pirate guy from the selkidomus hunting ep. he was actually reasonably hot. nothing nuclear, but i'd prob smash if i was at sea with him for a while.
odalia: 5.5/10. good level of evilness present, but she just isn't my style. nothing 'gainst her though.
raine: 5/10. your perfectly average gnc twink.
lilith: 5/10. she just looks like a regular person to me, sorry.
terra: 2.5/10. she's just kind of old and not hot. points for evil i guess.
statistics
characters rated: 14
total hotness: 100.5/140 (71.78% potential hotness achieved)
average hotness: 7.18/10
thanks for reading
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Spilling the tea before your petrification
Emperor Belos: Do you have any final words?
Captured Wild Witch: I-I do. May I? Emperor Belos: Go on then
Wild Witch: Great. *Clears throat* Um, Terra Snapdragon has Clam-ydia! Oooh! Icky! Yeah she’s been spreading that around faster than a forest fire. Boys that burning desire you’ve been feeling is actually just inflammation! Alright? Go see the Healing Coven!
Emperor Belos: Is this necessary?
Wild Witch: Um yeah. They’re my final words. I get to have my final words.
Emperor Belos: Ugh, alright…
Wild Witch: Amazing! Um, a witch in Latissa had a boy named Gavin out of Wedlock! *Gasps* Someone call Darius Deamonne because you are not the father!
Warden Wrath: Good Titan…
Wild Witch: Adrian Graye Vernworth is sleeping with the CEO of Blight industries, Odalia! Oooh that’s gonna be some family affair I don’t want to get involved in!
Emperor Belos: Oh that’s not good…
Wild Witch: Oh and Emperor Belos, Hi~!
Emperor Belos: Please no…
Wild Witch: No no no! Don’t worry! You did nothing wrong! You have a hole and it should be used! Right? Don’t let it go to waste it’s important to be curious and honestly, I think you’re brave. Especially for experiencing with the Coven’s head Cleric! Oooh! Tell me, did you find Titan up there? Hahaha, holy moly alright I’m-I’m good to go. Always wanted a big freeze. Have fun hashing all of this out, uh, peace and love, and I’ll see you in Heck!
Emperor Belos: I-I haven’t the slightest in what she was raving about! W-Wild witches say the craziest things right? Right?
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"Awoop!! JUMPSCARE!!!"
But like there's a flavour to it idk idk 👉🏾👈🏾
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i'm not sorry for either spamming with doodles or making very niche and self-indulgent AUs. i just fucking love this movie
(for context, Matt would be in his early 20s and Steve around 30)
edit: forgot to mention in the caption what movie this AU is based on 😭 it's The Pick Of Destiny, i'm in love with this silly movie
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.....Are you sure, Wrath? I mean.
Are
You
Sure?
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braxas has braces help me--
THAT’S WHAT THE TATTOO IS
IT’S FLAPJACK I BET LUZ’S IS A MATCH
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Seasons 1-2 Design Updates (Part 2)
Katya:
Warden Wrath:
Willow Park:
Amity Blight:
Gus Porter:
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based on the way wrath held his son in that one screenshot
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Oh, I think I made a connection.
Warden Wrath said: "...but some of us don't think this new world will be very inviting to magic-kind - wild or not."
This is what he tells Eda. He frames it as just rumors.
But there's a good reason why he, Warden Wrath, would believe such rumors:
Warden Wrath was part of the research team that studied Basilisk's ability to drain magic for Belos!
He obviously didn't know why Belos wanted them to study that at the time, but it probably contributed to his suspicions later on.
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