#Tw Mormons
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~TransMormon OC~
New OC for my AU time!
This is Hallie! She's a transcis woman (born female but feels like she should be transfem in some way), transmormon, and transBYU!
When she was 12 years old, she had a near death experience when her and her mother got mugged and she got her throat slit. Fortunately, she was saved after being sewn up and resuscitated! She swears that she saw God / Heaven though, and has never been able to live it down, as she was raised in an atheist family due to her mother's religious trauma.
She's a heavy metal fan and enjoys a band called Dead Girlz, which is popular in the universe of my OCs! The main singer is a Satanist though so it does give her a little bit of dysphoria listening to it on bad days!
One day, while she was 16, she was home alone and some Mormon Missonaries knocked on her door, thay had a conversation with her and left, but it left her with a hole in her heart that she couldn't quite place.
After that she did some research and joined the radqueer community, labeling herself as TransMormon and deciding she wanted to attend BYU and move to Utah!
After turning 18, her current age, she moved out and is currently living in Oklahoma, where her and her mother have lived all her life, saving up to move to Utah!
She considers herself to be TransMormon as her beliefs don't line up with the church but due to her near-death experience and experience with door-knockers, she decided that she believes in the Mormon faith!
The radqueer community is where she feels safest, and although she isn't a big poster, she still has moots, like High, that she interacts with often!
#radqueer community#radqueers please interact#rq 🌈🍓#pro radq#radqueer#rqc🌈🍓#pro radqueer#rq community#rq please interact#pro rq 🌈🍓#rq safe#transid#pro transx#transid safe#pro transid#transid community#transid please interact#transx#radqueer safe#Tw Mormons#tw christianity#Tw Christians#tw religion#tw religious themes#tw religious trauma#tw religious mention#tw religious imagery
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Therapist: Mormon knock-off LEGOs aren’t real, they can’t hurt you.
Mormon knock-off LEGOs:
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It really bothers me when people describe the way I grew up as "sheltered" when in reality I was not being sheltered or protected. I was intentionally confused. I was kept in the dark. My reality was being controlled.
#exmo#mormonism#exmormon#tw religious trauma#anti mormonism#ex mormon#anti mormon#apostake#ex christian#ex religious#my mother would fight tooth and nail to claim that she is a better mother than most#but the things she did and did not do for us is SHOCKING#for people who actually had good mothers at least
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diabetes pride shirt
eyes carrot, in a set with a non-eyes asparagus and radish
two very mormon ties
a tie i could kinda read and a tie i could have seen from a mile away
#submission#thrifting#shiftythrifting#mormonism tw#ties#religion#mormon shit#eyes#trypophobia#shirts#diabetes
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having mormon roommates sucks i said “sometimes you just need a mutual hairy-chested boyfriend for your relationship to reach its fullest potential” and they looked at me like i’m a twisted and perverted individual. fuck you that shit woulda done numbers on tumblr dot com
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ok people here's my essay. (also note that this was for my english class so it is written in a different style than i usually would. it had to be all formal and grammatically correct and such)
2212 words, analytical essay
She-Ra and the Princesses of Power: A Queer Allegory for Religious Trauma
ND Stevenson’s She-Ra and The Princesses of Power is an animated Netflix original series rebooting the classic 80s show Shera: Princess of Power. This time, however, the show is chalk-full of diversity, varied body types, queer representation, pleasing colour palettes, and a friends-to-enemies-to-lovers lesbian romance. The first four seasons follow Adora (aka She-Ra) and the princesses of Etheria’s fight against the Evil Horde, using their magic to try bringing peace and justice to the planet. A portal is opened at the end of the fourth season, however, bringing the planet of Etheria out of the isolated dimension of Despondos. No longer separated from the rest of the universe, Horde Prime arrives at Etheria- not only bringing higher stakes than any season preceding it, but an entirely new layer of symbolism to the series. The final season was a clear allegory for religious trauma, an especially relevant topic for the show’s majorly queer audience.
When his armada arrives at Etheria, Horde Prime sends his army of clones and robots down to take the planet by force. Unlike the Evil Horde that had been trying to take the planet before Prime’s arrival, who were disorganized, messy, and industrial, everything under Prime is sleek, elegant, efficient, and most importantly: white. Horde Prime’s ships are white, Horde Prime’s robots are white. Horde Prime’s skin is white, his hair is white, his clothes are white, as are all his clones. Pure, unblemished white, with only sparing accents of grey or green.
In colour theory, white has a few meanings. The colour can represent purity, cleanliness, innocence, and even righteousness. This colour theory is heavily incorporated into biblical verses, metaphors, and artwork (and some might even argue that our modern idea of white comes from the Bible). In art, God and angels are almost always depicted wearing white, as is Jesus in his resurrection. Halos of white or light yellow are shown adorning holy figures' heads. Several bible verses use white robes or other white objects as a metaphor of the wearer’s purity. White is still used in several Christian rituals/customs today, such as weddings, baptisms, and more. White is one of (if not the) most important colour in Christian lore. Even in instances where pure white isn’t used, there is a clear correlation between light versus dark and good versus evil.
White has more than one meaning, however- on the opposite side of the coin, white can also represent coldness, blankness, emptiness, and loneliness. The most interesting thing about the show’s use of white is that it encapsulates both facets of its representation. Horde Prime uses white to represent his purity and perfection, but to the people of the colourful, messy world Etheria, this is a cold, eerie colour. As are Horde Prime’s ideals. His perfection and purity is synonymous to coldness. The white represents both- not only simultaneously, but as the same thing.
Horde Prime’s empire being entirely white is no coincidence- neither in-story by Prime, nor in real life by the writers. Horde prime uses white to represent everything he stands for, and the writers use white to represent everything Christianity stands for.
Horde Prime is a being that has lived an amount of lifetimes beyond comprehension- every time his body starts to grow old and fail, he selects a new clone of his to insert his memory and very essence into. So even though he has a new body, he is still him. And the reason for this? To fulfill his self imposed purpose of bringing peace and perfection to the universe. To thousands of planets he has been, one at a time, to reach this. Horde Prime believes there is only one right way to do things, and that humanity cannot be trusted to govern themselves.
Every planet he takes goes the same: he arrives with his ships, and slowly implants chips into the neck of each and every being on a planet. These chips take away the autonomy of the host, and they are left blank. No personality, no choices, no person. All their actions are perfectly automated and controlled by a hive mind, and Horde Prime can take specific control of and see through the eyes of any individual at any given time. With Horde Prime in control, there is no war, no famine, no pain. There is only peace, perfection, and purity. And anyone who does not conform, does not accept his gracious rule, are dealt with accordingly. Entire planets have been left desolate and barren, entire peoples subjected to genocide for not accepting Horde Prime. All dead in the name of peace.
These ideals upheld by Horde Prime are strikingly similar to Christianity. Perfection and purity are two of the main ideals of Christianity, in hand with righteousness. Christians strive to “be like Jesus,” to be their idea of a good person, to be loyal to their religion, and to make it into Heaven. Several rituals to “repent” exist when they feel they have not upheld these standards correctly- including prayer, confessionals, sacrament, and baptism. Even though true perfection, purity, and righteousness are typically seen as unattainable to everyone but the Godhead, it is common belief that constant trying will at least get you as close to it as possible. Conformity is another key aspect of Christianity, though it is not advertised, and to the exact extent it is upheld depends on the sect. In general, though, Christianity pressures every one of its followers (and even those who aren’t) to behave a certain way, to think a certain way, and to only associate with others among themselves.
Horde Prime’s way of upholding these ideals isn’t dissimilar to Christianity’s either. Much like Horde Prime’s Galactic Empire, Christianity has had a long history of forced assimilation. From the Spanish conquistadors to the pilgrims and other colonial settlers of North America, death and pain has come in the wake of the spread of Christianity for hundreds of years, amongst various sects of the religion. Native peoples have been murdered for their loyalty to their “savage” non-Christian ways, land has been stolen, and indigenous religions and other important cultural traditions have been changed past recognition or completely erased, all in the name of “saving,” all in the name of “love,” all in the name of “what’s right,” all in the name of God. Christianity is the only right way, Horde Prime is the only right way.
Its likeness to Christianization isn’t the only resemblance Horde Prime’s ways share with Christianity, however. When Horde Prime arrives at Etheria, three people are brought aboard his ship- Queen Glimmer, one of the Etherian rebels that had been fighting against the Evil Horde (and now the Galactic Empire), Catra, a high-ranking member of the Evil Horde that had been taking over Etheria before the Galactic Empire arrived (but is in love with Adora, who is one of the rebels), and Hordak, the leader of the Evil Horde. Hordak was a clone of Horde Prime’s that had been stranded on Etheria, which was in an isolated dimension. He spent his time in isolation trying to take the planet so that if he was ever reunited with Horde Prime, he would be seen as “worthy”. Horde Prime, however, is displeased by Hordak’s actions- claiming that Hordak was trying to take the planet for selfish reasons rather than for Horde Prime, and for giving himself a name. As such, Hordak must be “purified.”
In this purification process, Hordak’s mind is wiped, and he begs for forgiveness and to complete the process. He is then dressed in white and walks into a circular pool with liquid that reaches his waist. The liquid is electrified for several moments, and his screams can be heard, and then it stops. He is left blank, and Horde Prime and the other clones watching praise him for being the purest among them. Later, Catra is subjected to the same process against her will, and is now a mindless servant of Horde Prime as well. This process is almost identical to the Christian concept of Baptism. While exactly how baptism is carried out varies between sects (full submersion under water versus just a sprinkling, infant versus child, etc), the purpose remains the same- to purify past sins.
A more abstract similarity between Horde Prime’s empire and Christianity is the use of titles. Prime’s clones refer to each other as “brother” (and to Catra as “sister,” once she has been “purified”), and Horde Prime as “big brother.” Not all sects of Christianity use such titles to refer to each other, but some do; notably Catholic nuns or members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons). But even those sects who do not refer to each other as brother and sister often view Jesus as their “older brother” and God as their “heavenly father.”
Horde Prime himself has many more titles than simply “brother” or Emperor of the Galactic Horde, however. Other titles given to him include Ruler of the Known Universe, Regent of the Seven Skies, He Who Brings the Day and the Night, Revered one of the Shining galaxies, and Promised one of a Thousand Suns. In Christianity, Jesus also is referred to by many names. The Saviour, the Redeemer, the Son of God, the Son of Man, King of Kings, Lord of Lords, the Prince of Peace, the Lamb of God, and several more. In addition to titles, some of the phrases in general used by Christians and the Galactic Empire are common. Both use the word “rejoice” when telling of their faith. Amongst Christians, “glory to God in the highest” and “[God] is the same yesterday, today, and forever” are not uncommon phrases. “Glory be to Horde Prime” is a common phrase expressed by the clones, and even more so, the infamous mantra “Horde Prime sees all, Horde Prime knows all” repeated so many times throughout the season.
The titles used for each other perpetuate a feeling of conformity and a feeling of “otherness” concerning those who do not conform. The titles used for their leaders perpetuate subservience, power imbalances, respect, and devotion. The phrases used in relation to their leaders perpetuate devotion and omnipotence. These are true of both Horde Prime’s Galactic Empire and Christianity.
Horde Prime was a genuinely disturbing villain who represented every painful thing Christianity is made of- toxic perfectionism and purity, conformity, obedience, control, and omnipotence. Loss of expression and individuality. The fear of being constantly watched. These are things that anyone with religious trauma may deal with, but it’s especially true of queer people. Queer people have had a long history of oppression at the hand of Christianity (and colonialism in general). From outright murder to conversion therapy and other abuses, from abandonment to dismissal, Christianity has perpetuated all of it for centuries. And it’s still something that happens today.
She-Ra and the Princesses of Power has a majorly queer audience, due to both the creative process of the show and the representation within the series itself. Not only is the creator of the series (ND Stevenson) queer, but so was practically every character- whether they were a main character, side character, or background character with only a few seconds of screen time. One of the main plots of the show is the complicated lesbian romance between Adora and Catra. As such, the series attracted a good number of queer fans, and religious trauma (or at the very least, religious fear) is a topic that hits uncomfortably close for many.
Other pieces of media that incorporate religious imagery have a tendency to be unclear about how it is framed. Is the imagery shown to be wrong and the victim is right and prevails? Is the imagery shown to be right, and the pained victim in terrified denial? Is the imagery shown to be truly wrong but inevitably triumphant anyways, no matter what the victim tries? It is so muddy in so many pieces of media. The important thing about the fifth season of She-Ra and the Princesses of Power was how it was framed. Perhaps it was because it was a kids show, or perhaps it was the queer creators’ spirit and defiance, but the series was clear in their framing of Horde Prime. The perfect white make the audience uneasy. Horde Prime’s retelling of his victories fill the audience with dread and then hollowness. The “baptisms” of Hordak and Catra are disturbing. Every aspect of Horde Prime and everything he stood for was presented as wrong. Without any doubt.
And even more importantly, the people of Etheria were able to prevail. She-Ra and the other princesses were able to defeat Horde Prime and his empire, and free those forced into subservience by his chips. Catra (and Hordak) were saved. The ships were destroyed. The people of Etheria were allowed to be free and express themselves and be people. This message was something very important to the queer audience. Not only was the fifth season an expression of queer pain, but an expression of queer hope. Neither thing should be ignored. Pain is valid. Hope is needed. To be healthy, both need to be recognized. To have a series that expressed both, and in such a queer way, was extremely important to so many people.
#long post#unityrain.txt#tw christianity#religious trauma#christian religious trauma#ex mormon#shera#she-ra#she ra#spop#shera spop#she ra spop#she ra and the princesses of power#she-ra and the princesses of power#shera and the princesses of power#meta#analysis#analytical essay#horde prime#the galactic empire#hordak#spop meta
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I swear on the grave I killed and buried God in that my loved ones will never have to question if my love is conditional
#ex christian#ex mormon#tw exmormon#exmo#religious trauma#tw religion#tw religious trauma#lgbtq#disabilties#body image#unconditional love#poc#people of color#body positive#disability pride#queer pride#trans positivity#trans pride#neurodivergent#adhd#autism#If the Bible is a book of love then why do you brandish it with hate
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bury me in childhood joy
they say a little girl died in that primary room,
arms folded tightly,
head bowed,
fidgeting silently.
her long natural hair, a testament to her mother's devotion:
brushing out painful knots
shaping tight braids
shoving sharp bobby pins in to keep it all together.
the itchiest dress you could imagine
but it was oh so beautiful
the scratchy fabric hurt more
as dresses increased in modesty-
modest dresses equaled more fabric
to cover up girls' vulnerable bodies.
that girl had the longest dress
she was modest. she felt like a monster.
"the spirit,"
they said,
"is a still small voice."
and for the first time, the girl recognized a lie.
the spirit was not still. was not small.
it was loud, roaring waves of emotion
that overcame her
and taught her that emotions have depth and range
she was happy. she was sad. she was crying, she was glad.
that child died before she learned the word "impulsive."
the promptings of the spirit were many. they were unpredictable.
the child didn't understand.
why would her leaders lie?
the lesson was forgettable. the message, not so much.
"you must be prepared to die for the church"
"you would rather die than deny your faith,
right?"
the child didn't comprehend martyrdom
but in that moment, she knew she would die a martyr.
and she did.
the child used to love wearing her ctr ring
"choose the right"
so she did.
she chose the right path
her ring rests on that primary chair
blackened with a sharpie and bent out of shape
#mine#writing#poetry#exmo#ex lds#exmormon#ex mormon#spilled ink#found my old ctr ring today#guess what I did to it#lgbtq#<- this was also meant to be a metaphor about growing up afab in the church#idk how well it came through#maybe I'll write another poem sometime#anyway enjoy! it's pretty raw but i like it that way#death imagery tw
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Ways (that I have tried) to try to make a church/religious community more inclusive:
(This is more my religion/Christian centered, but can be applied to any kind of organization really)
Refer to to all presidents of organizations as president regardless of gender (Relief Society President, Young Women's President, etc.)
Use all inclusive language in scripture / doctrine/talk reading (even if you have to replace a word) (replace son or daughter or gendered language with child, people, or all. 'Children of God vs Sons and Daughters of God).
Don't be afraid to speak up for and add perspective of marginalized people in church community. This doesn't just have to be ethnic or queer minorities, it can extend to divorced, widowed, childless, disabled or converted members.
Recognize biases in self and religious thinking, and try to self-correct in words and deeds.
Reframe conversations that may be hurtful in a 'Love One Another' and Christ and/or God centered way.
(feel free to add on!!)
Edit: Realized in church that making sure we are clarifying all "churchy" language, whenever possible. Like not just saying 'MTC' (Missionary Training Center, to prepare to serve missions), or 'deacon' (young men who hold the first level of the Priesthood).
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Having a lot of thoughts this m*thers day.
I HATE the way the mormon church automatically assigns m*therhood to all girls/women/afabs.
M*ther's Day at church always looked like making ALL the girls and women 12 and older (literal children) stand up while a member of the bishopric/branch presidency placated them with meaningless missives of gratitude and about how being a m*m is the most divine role a woman can hold (🤮🤢) while the young men passed out a cheap little gift to every single women standing.
I thought this tradition wouldn't exist in the singles ward. I was wrong. Same shit again. It was around then (18/19) I realized how gross this felt to me.
I don't want to be a m*ther. EVER. But I didn't even realize I had the choice to opt out of parenthood until I was a full blown adult (fortunately before I had any children) I was literally groomed for m*therhood by the church.
Young women's lessons and activities spent planning out children's names, making baby quilts for our future children (ma'am I am 12 years old. I AM children.) And learning parenting tips and how to be a good stay at home wife/m*ther.
I have such a difficult relationship with m*therhood and the mormon church is the cause for a LOT of it. I've been out of the church for many years now and I am still unpacking and unlearning.
But, damn this time of the year is hard for me.
#tw mothers day#tw mom mention#tw mother mention#childfree#childfree by choice#ex lds#lds church#exmo#exmormon#ex mormon#exlds#exvangelical#former fundie#ex fundamentalist#ex jw#ex christian#mother's day#mommy issues#mother wound#mommy trauma#cult free#cult#cult survivor
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If anyone's wondering how the mormon church states they view queer people, here's their own words
So you can be gay but you can't be gay. If you experience "same sex attraction" (or are "same sex challenged" as they've been calling it lately) you just need to crush those thoughts and be absolutely miserable for your entire life. Marry someone of the opposite gender, have kids. Constantly starving for freedom just out of reach and feeling like you're one day away from tying a noose around your neck.
Such a loving and accepting church. Elohim truly is a god of love. /s
Of course the truth is a bit different. They want us all dead, they just know they can't say that.
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One of my favorite elements of Mormon theology is how much of it is answering longstanding theological problems by looking at elements of longstanding Christian theology and saying "that's actually bullshit, so that other things not really a problem."
Take the "problem of evil". Basically it goes that if God created everything and Evil exists, then why did he create evil? Why did he create disease and death?
The Mormon answer to that question is "actually, ex nihilo is bullshit." God didn't create everything from nothing. There was raw matter just hanging out doing nothing, so God takes it and forms it together into, like, planets and dogs and people and CD roms and stuff. So death and disease happen because entropy is just a property of matter. Matter breaks down overtime so things made of matter are going to break. God's not making it happen.
"Why does God make people to be evil?"
"Actually the idea that God makes us with personalities fully planned out is bullshit" God gives us the right to, in part, create ourselves. We decide and construct our own personality.
Mormon theology is basically build of the foundation of looking at a problem that says "If X and Y are true, then what about Z" and saying"what if X and/or Y are actually bullshit?" Without even worrying about Z.
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What’s your favorite bible stories of god being really shit to people for no good reason? Obviously Job is THE “wait, is god the asshole” story, but personally I’ll never get over god just, y’know, TURNING LOT’S WIFE INTO A PILLAR OF SALT. Taking away what the story is supposed to be telling us symbolically, god did NOT have any good reason to do that. She did what, GLANCE BACK? Jehovah I promise you bro it is not that serious 😭
#ex jw#ex cult#cult tw#ex jw memes#jw#funnies#jw tw#ex mormon#memes#ex christian#ex jehovah's witness#cult#apostate#exjw#jw memes#pimo#religious trauma
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I don't know how to say this but there is something about being raised in the church and being taught to stand up for what you believe in but to always be humble so you never learn how to stand up for yourself or advocate for yourself but at the same time when your beliefs change you have to stand up for them and the morality you were raised on ultimately undermines the church's system because you know what agency is sacred and so is love and so is human life.
#mormon#exmo#exmormon#mormonism#tw religious trauma#anti mormonism#anti mormon#ex mormon#ex christian#apostake#ex religious#still have trouble standing up for myself though
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today at work this flock of mormon missionaries came in and I was taking this twiggy boy's order and I handed him a receipt and told him to take a table and then he turned around and he was CAKED UP I mean absolutely filling those slacks out like seam rippingly large could not be contained by his special underwear absolutely round bubble butt like my brother in christ I had to bite on my tongue to keep from screeching it was like stepping into a rake like this boy said aunt fanny but keep it modest to please the lord I hope that God is real just because he wanted to create the pinnacle of visual gags in a real life person like those bunkmates of his must be yanking on their shirt collars every time he wrestles with his khakis on the ground to get his fat fucking cheeks to yield oh my god
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sorry for the mormon humor. but what does a college education have in common with hundreds of cars getting baptized in the woods
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