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katisconfused · 2 years

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Distorted Reflections chapter 6

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Astrid was waiting outside of the Snowpoint Temple, one of the few intact ancient structures in modern Sinnoh. for Cynthia. She shivered from the biting cold. She honestly wished she had suggested they meet up actually in town instead of their destination. She never liked this area much. Something always had her on edge about it. Maybe it was because of all the areas of Sinnoh, the area around Snowpoint was probably one of the last truly “wild” environments. The harsh weather kept people from straying too far from the city and the paths leading to it. It wasn’t particularly uncommon to hear of people who did decide to ignore the risks wandering off to never be seen again.

She saw movement out of the corner of her eye, what looked like a person heading around the corner of the temple. Against her better judgment she followed after them, she got a better look at them, they were wearing what looked like a light pink hoodie and leggings? As she turned the corner her gut told her to be careful, and sure enough, the person seemed to look back at her and smirk. She stopped her advancement, slid a bit and knocked some snow forward… only for it to reveal some sort of sinkhole underneath, a cavern made of ice. She looked back up to look at the person, and they were gone. Shaken, she headed back to the entrance of the temple to find Cynthia walking up.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“Huh?” Astrid replied half dazed.

“You’re awfully pale, are you ok?” Cynthia said, more concerned sounding this time than the original teasing reply.

“....I don’t know, maybe I did. I’m not sure what I saw at all.”

☆

Astrid dragged herself out of bed the next morning, having slept even more poorly than usual due to anxiety. As soon as she left her quarters, she was greeted by Adaman and Irida. Kamado briefed them, as usual, and once again ending on his reminder of her being out of place. “No matter how many of these frenzied Pokémon you may quell, the fact remains that you are a stranger in our world. No small amount of people still regard you with suspicion and distrust. The most you can hope for is to gain the trust of as many as possible, and to do that, you must prove yourself through your actions.” Astrid doubted any amount of action would persuade Kamado, even if she did somehow earn the trust of everyone else, she seemed to permanently be on thin ice with him.

Was he even wrong to feel that way? She couldn’t help but feel it was somewhat hypocritical of him though. To the existing clans here, he too, was an outsider who had come here later who seemed to regard their gods with distrust. But given the situation she certainly couldn’t argue in her defense anymore. All she could do was continue to try and do good now. Even if it did turn out this was her fault, she would do everything she could to fix it.

Astrid went downstairs to find Captain Cyllene cowering from a wurmple. She pretended not to see it for her sake. But it was somewhat amusing to see the fierce woman was afraid of something so harmless. She assigned Astrid her mission and she headed out. Rei and Laventon were waiting at the gate.

“So we’re to make for the Alabaster Icelands?” She nodded in response. “I see. Of course I’m all too aware of the injuries done to some of our own good people because of the frenzies of other nobles. There seemed little choice but to intervene… But this avalugg out in the Alabaster Icelands hasn’t harmed a soul, as I hear it. Does it really behoove us to go out of our way to subdue him?” Astrid’s gut knotted up thinking about it. Should she tell Laventon her suspicions?

Rei and Lavernton debated about what the right course of action was. “There’s simply so much we don’t understand when it comes to the noble Pokémon… We don’t know whether their frenzies truly are causing them to suffer, nor do we know why they enter these states in the first place of if this is connected to the space-time rift…”

Astrid decided to be honest. “Actually, I may have some insight into these frenzies…” She interjected, pulling out the old verse. “It seems that when the original lords received their power, it came in the form of lightning strikes from the sky. It’s true the lords up until now were unable to control it and hurt people, and I imagine that in itself would be distressing, but it’s probably not hurting them.”

Laventon still seemed concerned. “What is it, I wonder, that the commander hopes will come from out quelling the nobles? Or indeed, from surveying any of the Pokémon of this land? What is it he hopes to achieve…?”

Astrid sighed. “Given the warnings about how I am only meeting the lowest bar of being worthy of trusting, I’m guessing he prioritizes the safety of the village over anything else.

“Indeed, the better we understand our Pokémon neighbors, the safer we’ll all feel and be. But if the real goal of this mission is to quell a noble for quelling’s sake, rather than for the sake of scientific study, then…”

“It’s kind of worrying to think where that could eventually lead.” Astrid finished. “Wanting to keep everyone safe and free of harm is a noble cause, but…” She thought about certain modern world problems. “You can justify a lot of things that you might not normally that way.”

They were silent for a moment. “Let’s not dwell on this, no good in fretting over worst case scenarios.” Rei changed the subject by challenging Astrid to a battle, but even during it her mind remained elsewhere. As she and Laventon headed to the Icelands afterwards, she decided she’d trust the rest of the thought she had started.

“Professor, can I be honest with you for a minute?”

“Of course my dear girl, what’s on your mind?”

“The rift was already open for a while before I came here, but other than occasional things dropping through the distortions, there wasn’t much happening with it, right?”

“Yes, the frenzies have been a more recent phenomenon. Why do you ask?”

“I’m worried that Kamado might be right to view me as a threat. Kleavor started rampaging right after I arrived, and since then the nobles have been becoming frenzied one at a time. Almost like they were waiting for me to be able to do something about them, as if the entire situation is some sort of elaborate test from the almighty Sinnoh to see if I’m worthy of it. Before I came here, I had a friend, she was everything I wished I could be, but wasn’t. Being brought to Hisui has given me a chance to actually accomplish that wish. But what if my wish has cursed other people to suffer? How can I be a hero if I’m the reason there’s something to save people from? What if quelling this last lord brings forth an even more dangerous ‘challenge’ for me? Honestly I feel like the one who should have been sent here was my friend, I was with her right before it happened, maybe god somehow missed its target…” Astrid trailed off, staring at the ground as they walked.

Laventon put his hand on her shoulder. “Astrid, what was the first thing you did when you got here?”

“Helped you catch the escaped Pokémon?”

“That’s right. I wasn’t able to do it by myself. And up until your arrival I was largely leaning on Rei, a child, to get my job done properly. I do my best, but I still make mistakes and need to be rescued from them. What would I do without you to help clean up after us?” He sighed and looked off at the horizon. “If the “almighty Sinnoh’s” will to test you truly is the reason why these frenzies are happening, I don’t think any of us mere humans are capable of stopping its plans, yourself included. I don’t know what Kamado thinks of you, but I don’t see any value in scapegoating you for being involved in something you have no control over. What could you do other than your best to endure it until some opportunity to change the course of things arises?”

She couldn’t think of an answer to that. Maybe he was right and she should try not to let it bother her. “If that is correct, it may be best to quell avalugg after all. If it is a trial for you, maybe more answers will come if you overcome it.”

☆

Adaman and Irida were waiting when they arrived.

“Astrid! Brisk out here, isn’t it?” Adaman said. Astrid agreed. She was glad she noticed the clothing shop selling warm clothing because if not she’d be freezing.

He turned to Irida. “How aren’t you freezing?”

“Freezing? I’m practically sweating. If you think this is bad, just wait. This is nothing compared to where we’re headed.” No wonder she dressed like that. Astrid had significantly more body fat than her, and was still miserably cold. Adaman and Irida bickered a bit, once again devolving into who worshiped the real almighty Sinnoh. Astrid just tuned it out, she’d had enough of this argument by now.

Astrid made her way to meet Gaeric, who was avalugg’s warden and Irida’s teacher. Apparently he could be found near Avalugg’s Legacy, which was across the Bonechill Wastes. The wind whipping across the frozen expanse was able to cut through even the extra warm clothes she had on. A snow squall started up, adding on impaired visibility. It probably wasn’t safe to keep going. She noticed a cavern in the ground. Past experience made her hesitate to seek shelter there, but unlike last time, she was armed with strong pokemon, including one that could climb back out of the hole fairly effortlessly. She called for Sneasler to bring her down.

She was not terribly surprised that the cavern was full of ghosts. Of course it was haunted. She should have expected that after the previous time… and once again in the corner of her eye she saw someone. She now recognized the garb as a Pearl Clan uniform, and it only made the last experience more chilling. The clans were long gone by then, a ghost was truly the only explanation.

She cautiously followed the “person” further into the cave, they led her to a dead end, turned around, the image dispelled to… a zorua? It was white instead of the usual black, and in her time at least, was not something you’d see in the wild. She sent out the newest addition to her team, a sneasel, and ordered it to use drain punch, only to find it had no effect. So it really was a ghost then? She recalled the fighting type to send out her honchkrow. “Madame you’re up, dark pulse!” The battle ended anticlimactically after that, she threw a pokeball which clicked with a successful capture. Unnerving, but the mystery was solved now it seemed. She returned to the opening to the cavern, determined the storm had passed, and left the hole to go find Gaeric.

☆

Astrid finally reached Gaeric. He asked on what grounds she came there to quell his lord. She… didn’t have very good answers for him, but he agreed to cooperate after a battle, telling her to fetch the balm ingredient for him. She then had to spend some time chasing Braviary’s warden Sabi from place to place in the freezing lands, before gaining their favor as well. Adaman showed up as Astrid received the plate from the lord.

“A world where people and Pokémon live and work together, huh…” He said, repeating what Ingo had said after he battle with Electrode. “Tell me—why do you think the lightning that comes down from the rift would cause these frenzies? Do you think this is all almighty Sinnoh’s anger? Or do you think this is a trial it’s putting to us?” He asked.

“You probably were wondering about me validating Melli before, right?”

“Oh I have been absolutely dying of curiosity.” He said with a grin.

Astrid pulled the old verse out again. “I have reason to believe these lightning strikes are what gave the original nobles their power. I don’t think it’s out of anger, but yes, it seems to be some sort of trial. Because of that I think while the nobles have been largely out of control and needing to be stopped, they probably aren’t actively in danger themselves… But that doesn’t seem to include Avalugg who is “frenzied” but apparently so far not violent about it. I admittedly feel a bit conflicted about going forward.” “But, if it is a trial—if we prove ourselves worthy, and we quell the last noble, calm Avalugg… then the rift really ought to close. Right?” Adaman asked. “Even if the one who seems to be clearing this trial is a newcomer like you, not one of us who’ve been living in Hisui for ages now.”

He was right. She had been caught up in thinking of better candidates to send back earlier, and immediately picturing Cynthia, but with Adaman’s point she once again remembered a certain someone already here who she had cited as an inspiration before. Honestly Adaman seemed like he’d have been a perfectly good candidate himself as well. Both clan leaders were perfectly capable.

“Well, as far as I can see, the one ushering in this new era is you. So if I stick with you, someday I might get to meet almighty Sinnoh myself!” Adaman concluded.

“Well, the mission it gave me was ‘meet every Pokémon’, and that task wouldn’t be complete without the master of time being included now wouldn’t it?” Astrid said with a bit of humor. “If I manage to catch it in one of my pokeballs, I’ll give it to the Diamond Clan so you all can bask in the presence of your god after I finish it’s dex entry.”

“Oh?” He grinned incredulously, probably not quite believing her. “I’ll hold you to that offer, but I suppose that hinges on you being able to get it into one of those balls to begin with.”

Astrid said goodbye to the two Diamond Clan members and took off to bring the balm materials to Gaeric. He somehow managed to race back to the Arena before Astrid did by jumping off the massive ice formation, in a move that would undoubtedly shatter Astrid’s bones even with a blessing from Arceus if she attempted to copy it. Maybe it was a good time to head back to camp to heal her Pokémon and gather supplies for the upcoming battle.

☆

Volo usually tried to get out of running errands for the guild, but a reason to be at the arena when Astrid arrived? Too convenient to slack off over this time. He passed through the valley near icebound falls, scooping up one of the riolu that were around there as an addition to his team. The alpha electrabuzz was not remotely a threat when faced with his recently evolved garchomp. It was nice to have such strong Pokémon he could count on. He had a good deal of pride in his ability as a pokemon wielder now. It was a good thing, too, as after finding out Astrid had a Giratina tracker he hesitated in calling it, especially when he knew she was somewhere in the area. If she was in reasonable range she would likely head straight for him. He exited the falls area and headed towards the arena when sharp shards of ice whizzed past his head. He turned to see another alpha, this time a piloswine, flanked by a few smaller ones.

Volo did the math out in his head, pretty much all his Pokémon were weak to either ground or ice. The only appropriately typed one was really the freshly caught riolu. Fuck, even Giratina was weak to ice, it could no doubt handle the alpha, but it could be in trouble if attacked from all sides in addition to it.

But… maybe it still could help him escape, suddenly he remembered the runes on his arm. “Giratina lend me your strength.” He quietly prayed. He felt his arm start to become warm, red energy seeped from his sleeve. He prepared himself to dodge and sure enough, the attacks passed by without any harm coming to him. His heart pounded in his chest as adrenaline flooded his system. The power flowing through him burned pleasantly. What a rush. Even if Giratina was a lesser god then Arceus, this kind of direct aid from it made him feel rather godly himself. He felt like he could see openings in enemy Pokémon’s attacks that he couldn’t before. An opening to run for it appeared and he used the last of the boost to escape and he managed to get to safety.

☆

When Gaeric arrived at the arena he was greeted by Volo sporting his signature smile. “Good day Gaeric, I’ve come with your swordcap delivery!”

Gaeric happily accepted the package. “Ah excellent, I will be able to make more of my super strength diet supplements now.”

“Have you been feeding that to Avalugg too? I hear it is the most impressive of the lords.” Volo wasn’t quite sure why he decided to steer the conversation to Avalugg. There was really no particular reason for him to fish for information about it. It’s not like Astrid had needed his advice to quell the other lords or it benefited him to give any. He was gaining her favor effectively enough already. He had already managed to manipulate her enough she was willingly offering him anything he asked of her.

“You better believe it! It’s said that Avalugg can keep growing through its whole lifespan! My lord is modest in size, and is about the size of Galaxy Hall. He could probably fit an entire village on his back!”

Volo’s stomach dropped. The previous lords had been dangerous enough, but this sounded like a whole new level. Maybe it was at least slow and easy to dodge?

“He can throw giant icicles at long range and even make ice shards erupt from the ground.”Gaeric stated proudly. “Are you ok Volo? You’re looking a bit pale. Don’t worry! Unlike the other frenzied lords he’s still in control of himself! You’re safe!”

Sure he was safe, but his miserable mind was having no issue conjuring a selection of gruesome deaths Astrid could face from this final trial. He was caught off guard by how upsetting the thought was. He had witnessed her bloody battle against kleavor and been largely unphased by it, if anything he had kind of enjoyed seeing someone he was so bitterly jealous of suffering directly from the gifts that they had been given, but now the thought of seeing it happen again, possibly worse, made him feel a bit nauseous.

A gust of wind blew from behind him, he turned to see Astrid and Braivery touch down on the ramp up to the arena. “Why, if it isn’t Astrid! What a pleasure, finding a familiar face—or any face—in this corner of the Alabaster Icelands. I came to bring Gaeric an order of swordcaps and he was more than willing to have a chat about Avalugg!”

“Oh really? I think this is the first time I have seen you actually do your job as a merchant.”

Volo frowned so exaggeratedly that it bordered on a pout. “Oh come on, that's not fair. I seem to recall having to deliver that heavy orange monstrosity you bought to you. How could you accuse me of slacking off? Anyway, what do you say? Interested in a bit of gossip?”

“Go ahead.” She wondered what juicy information Volo had charmed out of him. Instead it was… just a breakdown of how strong Avalugg was? “Doesn’t that seem a bit too powerful, too big to take on?” The amount of concern on his face actually surprised her. He could passably hide his emotions behind fake smiles… but that didn’t seem to be the case right now.

Gaeric said something about swordcaps and headed off towards the arena, leaving Astrid and Volo by themselves.

“You know, if I don’t do this I won’t get that ice plate you want from Avalugg.” She said teasingly to Volo. “Don’t tell me you’re more attached to me than you are to the idea of meeting Arceus.”

She really just came right out and stated the thought he was trying so hard to avoid. “I admit I’m far more conflicted about the situation than expected.” He tried to play the nakedly honest reply off as more playful banter. She once again just bought it as a joke. “Well, I did want to see that Avalugg but perhaps not at the cost of my life… and I don’t really wish to see if facing this trial costs you yours. So I suppose my freezing digits and I will be off then-” He was cut off as Astrid took his hands in her’s and held them against her to warm them up. It was also having quite a warming effect on his cheeks.

“I’ve been thinking a lot lately about why I was chosen for these tasks when I can think of far more worthy candidates for heroes than me… and honestly whenever I did I would usually land at the answer of being potentially disposable. No meaningful life to be disrupted or people to miss me like Ingo. Not claimed by anyone in Hisui and seen as an outsider even by the people who took me in, reminded that risking my life like this is the bare minimum requirement for my inclusion in society here…” She let go of Volo’s hands and pulled him into a hug. “Thank you Volo, it means a lot to have reasons to get back up when I’m knocked down. Especially given if I win this battle it might not matter if I don’t make it after.”

Volo was struggling to determine what to take away from what she just said. Was it a straightforward statement expressing thanks that his intentional farce meant to gain her trust apparently made him look good in comparison to the Galaxy Team? Was she actually onto said farce and was trying to throw him off? He needed more information.

“Does the Galaxy Team not value its most talented member? From what I’ve heard you’ve made more progress for them in the past few months than they have their entire time here in Hisui.” Which frankly was not a terribly long time compared to the existing clans, the idea of them complaining about “outsiders” at all was frankly a bit laughable to him. It was one thing for him to find Arceus’ choice insulting, but honestly if it had chosen Kamado it’d be an even larger one.

Her response was muffled by his coat as she buried her face in it. “Every time I successfully quell a noble, Kamado reminds me that he doesn’t trust me and that he will protect the village by any means necessary from threats… and the tone and context seems to imply I’m the threat not a villager to protect. I think Laventon and Rei care about me, but honestly I’m scared about what happens to me when I stop being useful… ”

This… actually bothered Volo a bit. Astrid had been in the village for months now. He was aware of at least one new Gingko Guild member who was a more recent addition then she was. Sure Astrid’s circumstances were uniquely suspicious, but as someone who’s culture had been nearly wiped out with no small part due to outside cultures becoming more dominant, the idea that the group of people made up entirely of settlers from other places was casting such harsh judgment felt bordering on offensive. There was a reason that the Pearl and Diamond clans had something of a tense relationship with the team, there were often clashes of ideals between old vs new between them. Where the fuck did Kamado, who came here with intent of molding Hisui to his ideal image, taking control from the people already here with no respect for existing culture. If he wanted to be the savior so badly, he should fight the building size iceberg himself. Volo was going to enjoy erasing him once he knocked Arceus off his throne.

No wonder he was getting away with using her so easily. The Galaxy team seemed to be outright reminding her that the only reason they hadn’t literally thrown her to the luxray was her being of use to them. He had been so caught up in his jealousy of Arceus acknowledging her and her being regarded as a hero, he hadn’t noticed that in reality that she was maybe less in the role of a self actualizing protagonist, than a sacrifice to the gods for the sake of everyone else. Would Arceus cast her aside the way it did him if she strayed from its path or failed? Was that why Ingo had no memory? Did Arceus break its toy and fetched Astrid as a replacement?

Volo wrapped his arms around her, pulled her in close, and rested his chin on the top of her head as he gently rubbed her back. “Well I’d certainly prefer to keep you around. If the Galaxy Team has no use for you, I can think of several.”

Astrid snorted. “Several huh? What do you have in mind other than plate collection?”

“Well, for one, I can slack off more efficiently if you make these obnoxious deliveries for me with the help of the lords you can call with your flute. You are more familiar with a lot of Hisui’s mythology than a good deal of the members of the Diamond and Pearl clans, and even read unown, making you useful for surveying ruins. Between the two of us, we likely could fend off even a hoard of alphas…” He omitted a few things from the list, such as the promise to set alight anyone who harmed him.

Despite the fact he had been actively trying to use her, the fact that he had still been viewing her more as an obstacle Arceus had sent to foil him had made him not really consider how long the list of benefits of her presence until now. How easy it had just been for him to cover for his more… questionable goals and list ways her presence was to his benefit. But at this point in his plans she actually slotted in quite well next to his Pokémon and Giratina in supporting him, both in something to wield against Arceus as well as attachment.

She snorted. “Oh, well when you put it like that, clearly I should have been dropped at your feet instead of Laventon’s. It’s almost like I was brought here for the sake of benefiting you.” If only. He thought to himself.

He pulled away, and smiled softly down at her. “Be careful, alright?” Astrid smiled back at him, before waving goodbye. Maybe he could stand to stick around in the cold a bit longer.

☆

Astrid approached the arena, snow blew around her, as the ground shook violently. From below her the gigantic lord appeared, bathed in its erie glow. If her theory of the lighting granting the lords power was correct, it made some bit of sense that Avalugg was not driven out of control like the others. Its original power and size was likely so vast, it made a more suitable vessel for the additional boost.

The battles against the lords had been getting more and more something where you couldn’t possibly survive without an equal blessing, but never was it more true then now. Even with the protection while dodging, Astrid was accumulating a worrying amount of damage. The pain was starting to cause her to disassociate. But as she became further detached from her body, her ability to react seemed to improve. She swerved between the attacks via some kind of autopilot. She had sent out Cynder 3 times now. It felt like avalugg was finally on its last legs.

She sent out Cynder a fourth time but… couldn’t seem to switch out of autopilot this time. Cynder looked back at her, concerned, avalugg prepared another string of attacks. She managed to avoid them once again, and this time managed to command her Pokémon when the next opening appeared, but remained disoriented even through being handed the plate. Was it really over? Her vision was still overwhelmed from the yellow glow.

“Is this Astrid girl some kind of monster in disguise?!” She vaguely made out Gaeric’s voice behind her, followed by what sounded like Irida defending her. She turned around, she could vaguely make them out, joined by what seemed to be Adaman and Sabi. “So is the space-time rift going to start closing, or what?”

“Astrid? Are you ok?” She wasn’t. Their voices came in distorted. She couldn’t ground herself. She couldn’t feel her body. She began to fall backwards, towards the edge of the platform, her Pokémon all tucked away in their balls, unable to come to her aid.

She stopped falling. Yellow faded into pink. What saved her? In the corner of her vision a white blob frantically buzzed about. “Nice job Togetic, just in time.” A more solid force lifted her up. Everyone crowded towards her in concern.

“You have pretty incredible timing when it comes to showing up to rescue Astrid, huh Volo?” Irida remarked as he scooped her up post-battle for a second time. “Ah well, I wasn’t going to stick around, but from what Gaeric had told me about Avalugg, I couldn’t imagine even Astrid would get through this unscathed. I suppose I have another delivery to make now, if you excuse me.” He said with one of his usual fake smiles, before processing to carry her back to camp.

The pain was finally setting in. She winced a bit. “Where are you hurt?” he asked, setting her down for a moment to try and determine where she was wounded. He grimaced a bit. Her pants were cut and there was a noticeable gash in her leg, it was somewhat amazing she had kept moving like that. He opened up her coat and lifted her shirt up. He could see bruising beginning to form around her lower ribs that weren’t included in the binding above it. “It’s a good thing your ribs are already bandaged up, I suspect they might be broken.” The majority of the other injuries were flesh wounds thankfully, he treated them and continued their trek towards camp.

“So togepi evolved? I knew you could do it.” She murmured, holding her hand up to the small floating fairy. “You’ve taken good care of it.” It responded with a happy trill.

“You should tell me all about it so I can write it in the pokedex because I probably won’t be able to pull that off myself trying to juggle caring for so many Pokémon.”

“Oh I’m sure you’ll do fine, you’re the esteemed hero of Hisui after all.”

“No you don’t understand. It takes ages of showering a togepi with love and attention to evolve them. It’s a big deal and you should be proud of yourself.” She held Togetic's tiny hands. “What do you say girl you wanna help catch me a Giratina? I bet you’d do great.” Volo choked back a laugh. He HAD actually noticed that Giratina occasionally looked at the fairy, as if to size her up and evaluate her as a threat since evolving. It was legitimately comical to imagine the massive dragon cowering from the little ball of sunshine he had as a partner.

They were almost back to camp now. “What exactly happened back there when you were facing Avalugg anyway? It was almost like you were-” “Possessed?” She finished the sentence. She stared off into the distance. “That’s what it kinda felt like, at least. At first I thought it was just disengaging from myself from the pain, but by the end there I felt completely disconnected from myself. I couldn’t feel anything. I couldn’t communicate. Only watch.”

“What do you think caused it?” He asked. “As the trials got harder I’ve been leaning more and more on the ‘blessing’. I sort of came to the conclusion before facing Electrode, that the lord’s frenzies were a blessing from Arceus, too. So to face frenzies I sort of became frenzied myself in a way, I guess. Arguably avalugg was the one to quell me back there, instead of the other way around. I don’t think anyone else picked up on what exactly was going on. You should be careful too, if you try to use Giratina’s power the same way. Who knows what effect too much would have on you.”

Volo didn’t respond. They approached the camp and Laventon ran up to them. “Astrid my girl are you alright? I knew we shouldn’t have made you fight such a mammoth Pokémon…” He turned to Volo. “Thank you for coming to Astrid’s aid once again. Why don’t you come back with us and we’ll treat you to dinner with us, since she seems at least in good enough condition to eat this time?”

“Oh I couldn’t impose-” Astrid looked at Volo with pleading eyes. “...I suppose it wouldn’t hurt.” He said with a sigh.

☆

Astrid reported to Kamado her success… and for the first time wasn’t reminded of his distrust of her, instead being told that tomorrow they would finally return to normalcy now that was behind them. She limped out of Galaxy Hall, unable to ignore the fact the rift remained open. Would it close soon? She hoped so. She headed to the Wallflower for dinner.

Rei and Laventon discussed things going forward now that Astrid had finished her job, the festivities dampened a bit by Astrid’s condition. She had to bit her tongue when Rei exclaimed how doomed they’d have been with the frenzies without her. Volo also seemed quite quiet, as if he was trying to make the other two forget his presence.

“Wait—if the rift were to disappear, would that mean Astrid’d be stuck here?” Rei suddenly asked. Astrid poked her food around on her plate. “Honestly, I’m actually ok with that. I can live without cars I suppose. I have more to lose going back than I do staying here now.” She smiled softly. “We can look into it if you change your mind, but you’ll always have a home here in Jubilife Village, Astrid. Laventon said warmly.

Volo stayed quiet, thinking back to the conversation outside the arena earlier. Were Rei and Laventon alone enough to make this worth it to Astrid? And you too, idiot. A voice in his head reminded him. She had included him in her earlier statements as someone who supported her. If she only knew. He was struggling to sit here and eat with them, knowing the rift would not be closing tonight. He was beginning to have second thoughts about his plans. Well, that had started earlier when he learned she was going to take on a multi-story building sized Pokémon, but it was rather unbearable to sit here and pretend he wasn’t about to make things worse for her.

They finished eating, and Volo helped Astrid back to her house. He helped her lower herself to her futon, which ended with him half kneeling next to her futon and looking down at her. He sincerely hoped with the window behind him that she couldn’t see his face, because surely he looked as flustered as she did right now. He pulled back and went to fetch her a fresh yukata to sleep in before showing himself out.

Astrid just stared at the closed door for a few moments before she started undressing, removing the satchel she was still wearing. Oh, she was kind of surprised he didn’t ask her about the plates she had received since she saw him last. She hadn’t even read them herself yet, maybe one mentioned Giratina! She pulled out the icicle, sky, and zap plates, the first two were not of interest, but the third was. “The third being raged, raining bolts of anger.” She froze. She had been assuming from the old verse description, that the frenzies were the lords simply overloaded by power, but maybe that was wrong after all. Maybe Giratina was in a way responsible for her wish being granted, in a twisted way. What need was there for a protagonist with no antagonistic force to oppose? It seemed the pain wouldn’t be the only thing keeping her awake tonight.

☆

Volo exited the village. He’d come back in the morning to deal with the fallout of what would happen next. Once he was beyond visual range, Giratina appeared before him. It cocked it’s head at him. Feeling… conflicted? Its erie voice sounded through his head. You seem unhappy… Why?

“It’s fine.” He had to do this, he just didn’t like the timing for it. Arguably, he wasn’t even going to cause damage to her reputation really. He doubted Rei and Laventon would turn on her, anyone who did was never truly her ally in the first place, were they?

Maybe he was just making excuses for himself. As of now, he was pretty sure she’d forgive him for the choices he’d made. But after this one… he wondered if he was sabotaging himself and creating a situation where she would likely hate him for, and want nothing to do with him if she found out. Volo turned to the fearsome specter before him. “Let us bring your siblings down from the heavens.”

#PLA #pokemon legends arceus #Volo #distorted reflections #volvo from my games

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tea-with-m · 3 years

Text

Getting into Dating them

Hazbin x reader

Male character editions

This is gender neutral what it would be like to date and maybe how you met these characters.

Characters include Husk, Alastor, Angeldust, Sir Pentious , Tom Trench, Vox and Valentino in that order.

Rating: Light fluff (Sfw)

Hope yall enjoy this my little tea drinkers.

Please send asks, it really motivates me to write more. Makes me feel like people are actually interested in what I write.

Husker:

(Gruff and grumpy, but has a kind heart underneath that rough exterior)

You first meet him at a bar he is a regular at, you wanted to give the place a shot and thought it would be nice to hit up a quieter place.

At the start he is pretty standoffish, gruff answers, won't really pay you too much mind. In general he just really does not care.

But the more you hang around him the more you'll peak his interest. How dare you !

You slowly work your way into being a regular at his spot.

You are an enigma to him. Like what even are you to be interest in someone like him. He’s Old, he’s grumpy, he drinks, and he’s sarcastic as all hell. Not to mention he gambles like it ain’t no bodies business. But you, your so... everything he is not, and that is okay... maybe.

He definitely likes to take his time to figure you and his feelings out, just cause he likes spendin time with you don’t mean Nothin !!!

Will definitely help if you share some things in common. He's not an Alcohol snob but he definitely knows his trade. Bringing him good booze every once in a while and it will earn you some point with him. If you can hold your own at a poker table even better. Even being able to hold your own in a game of Jin Rummy against him will color him a little impressed.

He enjoys someone who can throw back what he dishes out. Thick skin is recommended, insults and sarcasm are his love language. If he is putting in enough effort to give you sass it means he cares somewhat. In particular when it comes to you he puts a little more heart and care into it.

Surprisingly you find he dose really well when you lead the conversation, he likes to listen. But, despite his good listening ear he still likes to be heard. When he has something to say he is gonna say it and be blunt about it.

You have to be really patient with him. He is slowly to the whole relationship and trusting another person thing. Love has left him with a very bitter taste in his mouth.

Feeling vulnerable is one of his pet peeves. Its why Husker drinks so he wont feel. Surprisingly enough tho you spark a little flame with in him to start feeling again. Oh boy !

Won't admit it for the life of him but he really dose enjoy cuddling and being pet. He's a bit of a touch starved boi, so you'll have to ease him into contact.

Once he is comfortable with you physically, expect him to just randomly pull you into hugs, give you chased kisses, and plenty of cuddle sessions when you two are alone.

Another of his love languages is physical contact and quality time. He likes being with you and having some form of contact.

He is not much for p.a, but in private where no one else can see he will shower you with physical affection. He is not really good with telling you how he feels, he prefers to show you.

He likes to get you little gifts. If he sees something he thinks you might appreciate and he actually feels like it, he'll get it.

He won't put too much work into them, but you may find the gifts he got you surprisingly on your bed or somehow slipped into your pocket with a little note that has a pet name on it.

He gambles, but he is also shockingly good at putting money away, cat daddy is loaded. You would just never know it because like his hand at the table it is well hidden.

This man lives for your smile, so you better believe he will do everything in his power to keep you happy and smiling.

He loves your praises. When you shower him with positive words it gives him strength. Hearing how much you love him help to chase away any insecurity and self-doubt he might be battling.

Treat him well and he will do the same to you.

Alastor :

(Suave smooth talker, with eyes meant only for one who peaks his interest)

When he first lays eyes on you something inside him clicks, you make him feel... strange and he will want to know why.

He won't approach you right away but he will stalk you for awhile before he makes himself known.

The more time he spends watching you, the more he will crave being in your presence. You mesmerize him and after a while he will want to interact with you so that he can see your not as wonderful as he thought and he can make the feelings go away.

By the time he decides to approach you, you noticed he had been watching you. For quite some time, it actually unnerved you... just a little bit.

One night while at the hotel he sees you sitting at the bar. He silently walks up to you and makes his presence known.

" Hello my dear ! "

You glance at him and smile lightly.

Your eyes both lock and for that moment its as if your both searching for something. Perhaps the intention of the other ?

You both end up talking well into the night, and surprisingly you find you enjoy his company. When he isn’t being a lurk he is actually quite charming.

A few more interactions and he only found the feelings towards you have grown stronger. So naturally he asks to courts you, because its proper. He is very much a gentlemen.

After a few dates, his feelings for you bloom into something strange for him. Love is a very exciting but foreign feelin in Alastors case.

Expect to be dotted on. He likes to take care of you. There is nothing he wants to worry that pretty little head of yours or take that smile from your face.

His love language surprisingly shows in an almost motherly way. He loves to cook for you, will do your house work if he sees you haven’t the time, and oddly likes to do your laundry for you.

All the things he once thought were disgusting, are now seen as pleasing when they involve you. Don’t expect him to be all gun and barrel, but he does enjoy being quite cuddly with you.

Alastor is very much a sugar daddy, more in the sense of he showers you with gifts every chance he gets. He'll pick up things he thinks you'll look nice in, things he thinks you could use or want, or just something nice to help show you off and mark that you are his.

Speaking of marks, Al might not like make out sessions too much but he is big on love bites. If your not into being bitten or you don't like pain, let him know. He would hate to do anything you don't approve of, of course he will be disappointed .

Mutual respect, to him you are his equal. While he might have been a bit pushy and controlling at first, the longer you are together the more he will respect your opinions and voice.

He is pretty big on soft p.d.a nothing too wild. When your out he will hold your hand or expect you to hold his arm. He will give you kisses on the cheek or if he's feeling jealous he will lip lock you just to show every other demon who you belong to. Plus being able to leave you rather breathless strokes his ego and you do look oh so cute.

In private he is an unbelievable tease. He enjoys building you up just to get the satisfaction of seeing you come undone. He is also very high on body praise. This man will worship every inch of you if you let him.

This man is possessive and he definitely dose not like to share you.

Did he mention you are his, and once you've agreed to the relationship your his forever. Not that he would ever give you any reason to want to leave.

Once your in deep, he is devoted to you and he expects that in return. You two will be a power couple in Hell and he will see to it.

You are his world and he will raise you to new and great heights.

Angeldust:

( Sexy, Flirty and a total sweetheart )

You saw him at a club. Your friends had dragged you out for a good time on the town and this was your last stop.

You didn’t pay him too much attention, not directly at least. He diffidently caught on to all that side-eye you were giving.

You would certainly catch his attention, oh you weren’t like the others who gawked and drooled over him. No, you were cool, calm, and collected and you carried yourself like you knew exactly what you were worth. That confidence was a turn on for him.

He would work his way over to where you are, in this case it was the dance floor. The two of you would really have a great chemistry out on the floor which would lead to you to getting a drink at the bar with him.

A conversation later, sparks were ignited and you left the bar that night with the number of one of the hottest demons in hell.

When you two texted he would definitely be very, very flirty. But you surprise him when you let him know that you just want to take it slow and really get to know him for more than just the sexual side of it.

He is skeptical at first but he plays along. Maybe a bit of vanilla could be good for him.

Expect to be texted A LOT in the late hours of the night until the Early hours of the morning. He loves to talk to you, you really aren’t like most other demons down here, there is something genuine about you and he is loving it .

You quickly build a trust with him.

He feels like he can be himself around you. The good, the bad, you take it both and have still stuck around.

He will want you to talk to him until one, or both of you fall asleep. Just knowing that you are there for him is very comforting. His life tends to move so fast and have so many inconsistencies with people that is nice to have someone who takes it slow just for him.

He is a bit of a brat so expect for him to need a lot of your attention. You are more than happy to give and make time for him so his clinginess really shouldn’t be an issue.

He loves to be a tease and its not always sexual. But if he dose get a good response from you he might just do it to see your cute flustered face. It brings him joy to wind you up and watch as you deliciously lose it.

He loves to be pampered, but its a two way street so expect to receive some sort of pampering right back. Lots of trips to the mall or fashion outlet. He is a high end boi and loves to make sure both of you are lookin and feelin your best. Couples massages are a must. And eating in is preferred to eating out, he draws a crowd and he would much rather spend that time with you.

Emotional breakdowns and shut in are a thing with him, be supportive and let him know you are there for him and he will cherish you even more. Its important that he feels you are someone he can trust.

And sometimes that means spending the night with him at the hotel so that he doesn’t have to be alone.

Fluffy tit cuddles, he will 100% pull you into his chest and just nuzzle you when ever he feels like it. He dose not care where you are, if he wants to give you attention he is giving you attention and there is nothing you can do about it.

If you tell him your not really into p.a he will respect your boundaries but expect to compensate big time for his lack of public affection. He will shower you in love and affection behind closed door.

Body worship, kinky teasing, a barrage of kisses and make out sessions. Honey when he get you alone he is taking you to town and you aren’t comin back for a while.

Mutuality is big for Angel, he will give back what you give out. Law of equivalent exchange in the bish!

When it comes to gifts he likes to bring you outfits, dressing his baby up brings him joy. Just wear what he brings and you'll make him happy. Oh also food, he loves to give and receive things to eat!

You help him bring out his true self and your relationship will help both of you bloom, being the best you both can be.

Love him true and he will love you till the end of his existence.

Sir Pentious:

(A total gentlemen with a huge ego of course )

First time you saw him was on the news, something about him peaked your interest so you decided to seek him out.

You went to his place of dwelling and some how managed to convince him to give you a job.

At the start it was purely business, you helped him develop his machine and aided in turf wars whenever they sprang up.

But as time passed you began to show him your ideas for how to improve thing. The more you brought to the table, the closer you got.

You both would spend hours in the workshop. So many late nights are great canon fodder for intimate bonding.

Slowly a relationship that was about more than just work bloomed. You enthralled him with your quirks and mental prowess. He was sharp, but you somehow managed to be just as if not more than he.

One day he would approach you while you were working in the shop with the egg bois, and he would confess his feeling. He would ask to court you being old fashioned. He is a man of class and there are certain ways to go about things when you have just such inclinations.

He likes to make things for you. Most of them are tech based, but sometimes he surprises you. Sleek and well designed weapons and contraptions of all sorts. Why buy objects he could make and improve himself.

This includes cloths, you find out he is a couturier. He makes all his own clothes. How else would he make sure the designs are of the utmost highest standard. And he is more than happy to make all your cloths too, can't have his dearest looking like the common swine. No, no, no.

He is very dapper about his appearance and expects the same from you, though if you don't really have an eye for fashion he is more than happy to help you out. He is a very firm believer that looking your best will help you feel your best as well. And he thinks the world of you.

He is big on pda, he loves having you on his arm or holding your hand while out on the street. You are gorgeous and he wants all of hell to see just how perfect you are.

He loves giving you kisses on the hand. Kisses on the cheek. Chased kisses. Kissing in general really. He loves the way you taste, so you might actually find him sticking his tongue out a lot more around you. He tries not to make a habit of it. He’s got to stay proper, but gosh darnit he just can’t help but do it unconsciously.

He is a gentleman. Emphasis on gentle. He is very careful around you and would be cross with himself if he ever hurt you. To him you a delicate flower full of beauty and grace. Even if your not so delicate he will always be very gentle with you because there are times where he just doesn’t know his own strength.

He can be a tad bit jealous and he can get pretty defensive when others stare for too long. How Dare they don't they know who you belong to. It’s can be a little frustrating at time because although he wants the attention, he also does not like people gawking. In particular other men. He will get into a fight over you. Hell help any man who made a rude remark. That would be their extermination day for sure.

Likes to give you lots of things, all of which he made himself in some way shape or form.

Be genuine with how you feel and he will try and do the same. He is very big about appearance. Assure him, he is fine no matter what and put his mind at ease a little.

When he falls in love he falls hard and he will be devoted to you an you alone.

Tom Trench:

(Acts confidents but is a secret shy guy, major simp)

He is naturally charming. His News Anchor position had seen to that. His job is to keep the rating high and the viewers entertained.

You worked as the Social Media Manager for the station, it was your job to make sure the Voxtigram was up to date with all the current news and juicy tid-bit for the channel.

Normally you would get any pictures you needed from the photographer... Mike ? Or whatever his name was, but seeing as he was taken out in the recent exterminations meant you had to get pics yourself while they found a replacement for him.

You went in as needed, you wanted this to be a quick in and out job. Having to take extra time to get the photo’s meant you would be working overtime you definitely weren’t going to get paid for if you were not careful.

You showed up to the places’ your manager told you to be. Tom was there on time and Katie of course was not. He told you that she was getting ready.

You sighed in annoyance, and Tom shook his head in agreement.

“ I know, she takes forever. But once she’s out here it should go pretty quick.”

It took you by surprise that he was being...nice... to you. You’ve heard he and Katie can be a nightmare to work with. You decided to try and test the waters and started with a bit of idle chit chat.

Surprisingly he was easy to talk to and an absolute delight for casual conversation. But the good track you were on was suddenly shattered once Katie enter the room announcing her presence and demanding that you get this shit moving along.

You internally rolled your eyes and offered her a fake smile being polite to her and moving quickly in order to not aggravate her.

After about an hour of struggling with Katie you were able to get the shots you needed. You were about to leave when Tom stopped you.

He gave you a folded piece of paper and was about to say something before Katie pulled him away toward the broadcasting room. You looked down at the paper before shoving it in your pocket and walking away.

You could read it later, right now you had work to finish, since the royal bitch put you behind in your work with her less than pleasing attituded to your simple instructions.

You completely forgot about the note in your pocket as you were consumed by work. It was only at the end of the night, when you began to wind down did you remember. You were taking your cloths off to take a shower and the note fell out of your pocket and onto the floor.

You picked it up from the floor and unfolded it, it was a simple piece of paper with a number on it that said

“Lets talk ?”

It made you chuckle a bit. You didn’t expect someone so used to the lime light to be a bit shy. But hey, you thought it could be fun and after your shower you deiced to hit him up.

You spend many night texting back and forth before he gains the confidence and comfort to actually ask you out.

You find out that his suave news reporter persona, is just that, an act he puts on for everyone else to see.

In actuality he is a bit shy and can ramble over his words if he is particularly nervous, which happens a lot since he really seems to like you.

He is actually quite sweet, and although he tends to get walked over. Hell doth have no fury for the idiot who thinks its okay to do that to you. He WILL NOT let anyone speak one bad word about you.

Kattie found his kill switch real quick when she started bad mouthing you. She was actually impressed that he could grow a pair, she just thought it was a shame he couldn’t do it for himself. Somethings better than nothing I guess.

His love language is sweet words and little well thought out gifts. This man is actually pretty crafty and will make you a cavalcade of different things.(lowkey I see him probable knitting or something like that).

You are the only person in Hell who has seen his face without the mask. That one took a whole lot of trust building but was Well worth the wait. You find he wears it less because he has to and more because he dose Not want to be mobbed by people.

Under that mask he is an unnatural level of sexy. If he wants to get you worked up quickly all he has to do is take off that mask and stare at you with those dreamy black and blue eyes.

He is a bit of work from time to time. But some patience and a tenacity that wont quite will see to a very fulfilling relationship with this shy show host.

He will 100% simp over you. Being at your beckon call.

Treat him gently and he will give you all his love.

Vox:

( Confident and self-absorbed, but has a secret soft side, also a bit of a dork )

You were a rebound after he got dumped by Val... Again. Really he was just looking to make the other overlord jelly. He wasn’t expecting to actually like be into you after your little fling.

It starts slow, mainly because he refuses to admit that he actually likes you for the longest time. But sooner or later he caves. He just has to go out on another date with you again.

You of course after being ghosted for quite a while do not make it easy for him to get back with you. There is a little bit of time where you yank him around until you relent and agree to go out with him again. Having been with Val he is actually quite used to it.

After date number two things kind of take off. You both start talking Way more and you best believe you become an accessory when he goes to events. He really likes having you around and on his arm as well, and it totally isn’t because he wants to make Val jealous with his new and clearly hot s/o.

But , tbh, to him it is about more than just having you there physically. Although he is pretty bad at verbally letting you know that you are special to him. He much prefers to show you.

Sometimes he can be a little clueless tho.

Expects lots of gifts and flowers and plenty of fancy cloths and expensive dates. Man has got money and that's the best way he know to show you you are special. That's what Valentio liked and everyone else he dated before that so you’ve gotta be into that shit too right?

Weather you like being super spoiled or not, eventually you start working with him and help him to see that a relationship is more than just literally dumping shit at you. It takes time, like a lot of it, but he will catch on. Sooner or later.

Just please be patient with this boi, he isn’t so great at the whole feelings and intimacies thing. But that don’t mean an old dog can’t learn some new tricks for you specifically.

He really appreciates words of affirmation. Although he is pretty cocky and genuinely confident he still likes to hear your sweet little words. It strokes his ego which from time to time can be deflated by his own insecurities.

You were very aware going into this relationship that you were gonna need to give it time to crack this locked safe of emotions. He is not used to being vulnerable and this will cause your relationship to have many, many bumpy parts to it.

If you get into a fight he is likely to sulk and avoid you for a couple days and then feel really shitty because he has been ignoring you. Eventually he will come around and want to talk it out. Just give him some time okay.

Again patience really is the name of the game when dealing with Vox. Though his life is particularly fast passed, he need to take the time to slow down and process form time to time.

With that said, you both agree that anything worth having is worth working for and if you don’t give up on him you will reap the reward of someone who is incredible loyal.

Building and strengthening the trust you have will carry to incredible places with him.

Once he has decided you are truly what he wants, he is in it for the long haul and will be completely and totally devoted to you and you only.

He may playfully gawk at others just to see you get a little jealous and so that he could remind you that although he could have anyone he wants, it is you he wants to say with .

Honest Love is what you will receive when he gives you his heart.

Valentino:

( I really don’t know what to say about him... He’s a pimp sooo like... If you can keep and hold his respect you are getting somewhere)

Lets be real, you know off the bat that getting involved with Valentino is a Huge pain in the ass. Largely in part to his personality and stubbornness.

But he took an interest in you and you thought, what the hell ! This could either be tons of fun or a total waste of my time. You are the ballsy and adventurous sort so you liked a challenge.

You made it very clear from the get-go that you were not gonna let him push you around. You gave no fucks who he was, overlord or not. You had your standards and you were gonna stick to them dang it.

That, besides the fact that you were a very sought after person in hell, was why he liked you. You took no shit and you knew what you were worth and honestly to him it was sexy as hell.

You dynamic is very top to top in public. But in private he would really prefer that you take care of him. He has to be in control all the time and the fact that your equally as dominant means he can flip his switch when no one else is watching.

Honestly it took you by surprise at first. But you quite enjoy the little power dynamic.

This man is loaded to the tit as his industry sells a Lot. So if you're fashion sense was on point before expect it to go up another 10 levels. The accessory on his arm has to look as good as he does after all. He won't let you two go uncoordinated. Everything you two are seen has a theme and looks like it goes together perfectly.

He isn't really one for long term relationships, so however long your fling lasts once he gets board its over and your donezoes.

However if he liked you enough he might not completely kick you to the curb. He'll call you back when its convenient for him. And pull you from a rotation with some other side pieces.

Of course because of who you are, you bluntly refuse him and ignore him when he throws a fit at your unwillingness to come crawling back to him.

You are the first time he has not gotten exactly what he wanted from someone. And that pisses him off. So you best believe he is going to try everything to get you to come back to him.

At first he tried to win you over with gifts, you sent them back every time. When sweet didn't work he threatened you, tried to black mail you, sent his goons to drag you back to him, at one point he gets so frustrated he puts a hit on you. But of course nothing worked.

All this time scheming to get you back gave him room to think. Really think about why the hell he was doing all this for one person... and when he really got to thinking about it. He realized he was whroe-ishly desperate because he genuinely liked you, might even go far enough to say he even loved you a little bit.

At his realization he freaks out and goes to the only person he could even think of talking to about this Velvet.

After talking things over with her, she points out that its going to be very hard to get you back after everything that has happened and pretty much tells him to just give up cause your not worth it.

He became pretty depressed after that. He just wasn't the same Val. Vox and Velvet began to notice that his work began to suffer the more he mopped about losing you.

It frustrated Vox so much because with Val's side of the business slowly doing poorly it affected him and Velvet too. He decided the best way to deal with this problem was directly. So he kidnapped you and brought you to the studio.

He made a big scene of it. Tied you up and brought in Valentino. He said if they are such a problem for you then I have a simple solution. We'll get rid of them.

This made Valentino snap and he got into a fight with Vox.

During that time Velvet put into motion a little plan she had. She essentially walked up to you and just explained what had been going on with Val and what he told her. She let you know that Val realized he screwed up and that he actually really liked you and this whole mellow drama was all because you actually made an really big impact on Val.

Part of you was flattered and the other part frustrated with all the drama.

Valentino won the fight and walked over to Velvet and sternly demanded that she let you go.

Once untied, you folded your arms and looked away from him.

He apologized for all of this and everything he had done before and told you, you would never hear from the likes of them again.

You sighed and looked at him. You said that if you were really all that much of a fuss for him, you guessed you could give him a second chance.

He genuinely looked hopeful.

And you quickly and sternly stated that things needed to be different. You need to talk and set some boundaries and actually take the time to get to know each and not just for show. You also made him swear that if things didn't work out he would find a way to move on with his life so this didn't repeat.

He rubbed the back of his neck and said he couldn't make any promises but he would certainly try and do things differently this time.

Your relationship from then on out was still a lit of drama and attitude but it did work out for the better. You both genuinely work through things and for the most part have a healthy and happy relationship.

You reap what you sow and hard is the work for they who plant the seeds.

Wow that really took me a long time to write out and part of the reason was writing for Val. I had such a hard time coming up with his. But hey its done and now its out and a Big Thank you for everyone who waited.

#Hazbin Hotel #hazbin hotel vivziepop #husk x reader #alastor x reader #angel dust x reader #sir pentious x reader #tom trench x reader #vox x reader #valentino x reader #hazbin alastor #hazbin husk #hazbin angel dust #hazbin sir pentious #hazbin tom trench #Hazbin vox #hazbin valentino #hazbin boys #hazbin x reader #hazbin hotel x reader

2K notes · View notes

svfttachi · 2 years

Note

Can I request modern au headcanons for wearing Sasuke’s clothes, t-shirt or boxer? What’s his reaction? Does he find reader cute or annoying?

SYNOPSIS: In the request above ^

WARNING(S): None

TYPE: Modern AU, Fluff

WORD COUNT: 503

NOTES: My first request!! Thank you for submitting this amazing request! It's my first ever list of headcanons, so I hope they are somewhat accurate to Sasuke's character. It was actually hard for me to not write a whole oneshot about it, so I hope it's good!

Sasuke’s hoodie was an article of clothing that is worth getting your hands on. The softness of the inside was enough to put you into the same mood as if the real Sasuke was there, and it made you feel his company even if he were off at work or hanging out with Naruto.

The hoodie also had his genuine, fresh and clean smell embedded into the fabric, and no matter how often you wore it, you could smell him on it. This made it one hundred times better for whenever you were missing him during the day.

You were just cleaning the kitchen when the front door opened, unknowingly, to allow Sasuke to enter the home earlier than he usually would come home. He stepped into the kitchen, staying near the archway of the entrance when he spotted you immediately.

A fiery blush reached his cheeks upon noticing the familiar top you were wearing. It was a simple, black hoodie that he wore whenever he was out with Naruto or just chilling at home.

At first, Sasuke would be mentally questioning why you were wearing his clothes versus the entire wardrobe that belonged to you, and only you. He feels his fashion choice doesn’t fit to your standards as well, so he doesn’t understand why you would be wearing his hoodie.

After all of the questionable thoughts about why you were wearing his hoodie left his mind, Sasuke would unfreeze from his position and walk up to you with a plain look on his face. Bluntly, he would ask you, himself, why you were wearing it just to keep him from pondering on the subject any longer.

Of course, seeing as he literally came out of nowhere, you would yelp in shock and turn to find your man standing right behind you with a neutral face, as always. After collecting your breath, you just shrugged your shoulders and said, “It’s super comfy.”

At this closer distance, Sasuke would begin to look you up and down. Either you were wearing the hoodie by itself or you wore something underneath, it still made his heart pound rapidly inside of his chest. Somehow, seeing you in his clothes was giving him a new sense of emotion, something he found cute and admirable.

Definitely thinks you are adorable wearing his clothes whether it fits perfectly or is super loose on your body. A smile would come to Sasuke’s face when you explained why you felt the need to wear his hoodie, and he would pull you into an embrace.

Since he wasn’t close with his biological family members, having you in need of his presence was something that he took to heart. Sasuke felt at home whenever he was with you, and knowing you use his clothes to feel closer to him when he’s away makes him want to come back earlier to be there in person for you. Wearing his clothes was one of those ways of showing him that he means alot to you.

NARUTO MASTERLIST

WRITING MASTERLIST

NAVIGATION

121 notes · View notes

iiraven · 3 years

Text

Fool-Proof Plan

Pairing: Erwin x reader

Genre: fluff, comedy, smut, modern AU

Warnings: size kink, masturbation, squirting, fingering in front of a mirror, hair pulling, multiple orgasms, manhandling, degradation, praise, established relationship, slight dumbification, choking/ breath play

Word count: 4.6K

Synopsis: Erwin’s business trip leads you to realise you’re not as sly as you think you are.

Masterlist

Erwin Smith is a man capable of absolutely everything. He’s an amazing cook, an amazing masseur, an amazing businessman, and, most of all, an amazing husband.

There’s only one small shortcoming to the person you consider to be perfect. And that’s his inability to use any form of technology. Texting is bad enough with him signing his name after every message, but it’s social media that’s your husband’s true sworn enemy. Erwin might only be a few years your senior, but somehow your grandfather can comprehend the concept of Instagram faster than him.

“So, you just take pictures?”

��Yes.”

“And people respond to it?”

“Yes.”

“Alright but why?”

The conversation is nothing new, but you find it incredibly unfortunate knowing how talented he is at photography. If you two ever go someplace Erwin knows he wants to capture, he slings his camera over his neck, leaves his phone at home (“I won’t be taking any calls today”) and makes his merry way out of the house. You often eye the phone left stray on the desk, half-expecting it to chase you out of the house for abandoning it. Sometimes, for good measure, you slip it into your own bag. Just in case.

It’s for this reason that Erwin’s business trip puts you on immediate edge.

“It’ll only be for ten days,” he had said. “Sina Corporations takes their summits really seriously…”

“Ten days?” You repeated and Erwin gave you a soft smile.

“I’ll call you every day.”

It’s not like you have an obsessive attachment to your husband (well, that’s debatable), but breaking the routine of returning home to his warm hugs, listening to his day and then complaining about your own- it’s uncomfortable.

Erwin himself wasn’t looking forward to being away from you, away from home. Running Survey Corporations Ltd is no easy task; trying to balance the infuriating board and the long hours with his actual life is something only possible because of you. Time spent together is fine diamonds Erwin clutches onto and although he’d tried to reason with himself that it was only ten days, it wasn’t a trip he was looking forward to. He never said it out loud. But he didn’t need to. You can tell by the way Erwin’s lips linger on yours a little longer at the airport, as if to preserve your taste.

“Oi Erwin- hurry up.” Levi tries hard not to glare. But even the raven-haired man knows that being away from you puts Erwin on somewhat of an edge. You’re his rock, there to ground him when everything is chaotic, and a summit surrounded by the richest people in the world is as chaotic as it gets.

Despite it all, Erwin stays true to his promise. He calls you at least twice a day and although you could stay on the phone with him for hours, he’s often rushing between conferences and can only spare minutes of his time. Even when he does have an hour, talking to a disembodied voice (he still can’t figure out how to switch his camera back around) is not the same as having Erwin right beside you. It’s the way he squeezes your thigh when he’s focussing on what you’re saying or when he pulls you towards him so that you can lie on his hard chest which still makes you blush even after years of being together.

Because, yes, you miss his touch the most.

Not even five days in, you find yourself with your hands down your panties and a tall blond man on your mind. You’re soaked just thinking about him. His groans, the way he calls your name, the way he pounds into you as you lose your train of thought. Your fingers try to imitate his- their curve and how easily they find your soft spot- but it just feels uncomfortable. So, then you try rubbing your clit, and there’s temporary pleasure there, but not even close enough to tip you over the edge. Even your pink vibrator doesn’t cut it. You deny the fact that Erwin Smith has made you an incompetent masturbator, but you can’t keep up the lie for long and soon enough you give up.

It’s the next day that your ingenious idea kindles. It’s a fool-proof plan. A small flame that has you rushing to the bathroom for the best possible lighting. Erwin can still put his tongue to use at a distance- after all, it’s his voice you fell in love with first. To discretely push him in the right direction, you send him a few photos of yourself. Nothing too scandalous safe he’s in a meeting, but enough that he’ll gets the hint. Sure, Erwin has a couple of polaroid pictures hidden in his brown leather wallet, but he had shot those himself. You want to be a bit more spontaneous! And, honestly, at this point you’re desperate. You could swear you’re developing withdrawal symptoms: just the other day, you were actually temped to pick up a newspaper. It was terrifying.

This had to work. You can just imagine Erwin calling you, voice deep and gruff as he guides you through the process to make yourself cum as he showers you with praise. You feel giddy, eyes glued to the glowing screen, awaiting his response. Even your pink vibrator is out of the box.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t exactly go the way you had planned.

One hour after sending the photos you receive a panicked text from Hange. In the long paragraph, you understand that your poor husband couldn’t get the photos to load and decided to consult the vice president of his company who, upon simply clicking on them, saw you groping your soapy tits. Had it been anyone other than vice president Hange Zoe, Erwin may have broken his phone and quit right there. Thankfully, he only said, “I see” and then asked her where to find the smiley face Emoji.

“I’m so, so sorry Y/N!” Hange screams through the phone. “I’ll make it up to you, I promise! I could send you a picture of my boobs! I’ll go do it right now! I’m sorry! No- You don’t need to feel embarrassed! I won’t mind!”

“It’s alright Hange.” You laugh nervously. “You don’t need to send me anything, it’s really not that big of a deal.”

The whack Levi lands on her head is so hard you hear it through the phone. “Shut the fuck up four-eyes.”

So here you are now. Three days until Erwin returns, a vibrator you’ve given up on back in its box, and a husband who responds to your nudes with a smiley face.

But then Hange Zoe sends you something much better than a picture of her boobs.

The hotel that the trio were staying at- as most hotels do- has a spa. And if there’s one thing Erwin Smith adores it’s allowing himself to relax in a warm, steamy sauna. You’re not sure how Hange was allowed to join them, or how she was able to get her camera clear of fog, or how she was even able to take the picture without Erwin noticing. But you ask her no questions.

Followed by a winky-face is a picture of Erwin sat in the sauna, head tilted backwards, and eyes shut in the pure image of serenity. His arms are propped up on either side of him accentuating his biceps whilst still allowing a clear view of his sculpted body, the sweat running down his chest and abs, making him almost glisten. He’s completely naked except for the flimsy white towel across his lap which does absolutely nothing to hide his thick dick print. You shudder.

You feel like a teenager again, speechless at the sight of a quasi- naked man. Even though you’ve seen him like this thousands of times, you can’t help but fantasise about being trapped underneath him, hair falling onto his face as he loses himself inside of you. God, maybe you do have an unhealthy obsession. But it doesn’t matter. You feel even more like a teenager as you imagine scenarios of him returning home to recreate the picture before you. And with that, your mind is sedated for the next few days.

You have a fool-proof plan. Dress up in the shortest and tightest dress you own, cook your husband dinner, and then give him a blow job at the table so that he’ll never leave you again. It’s going to be just like in the movies and nothing will stop that from happening.

Something stops that from happening.

Just as you’re about to put the potatoes in the oven, Erwin calls. His flight is delayed. You whine through the phone and Erwin’s chuckle just about stops you from sulking like a child. You can be mature about this, right? He’s getting home eventually- complaining isn’t going to help at all. Patience is a virtue and yours has been tested many times before. This is, after all, nothing compared to the time Erwin tried to create an excel spreadsheet. So, you don’t press further. You simply tell Erwin that you miss him and then go find a pillow in which you scream for a good five minutes.

Erwin, on the other hand, is a lot less coveted with his annoyance. He wants nothing more than to strangle whatever and whoever is preventing him from returning to his lovely wife. In the hour journey, the entire plane can feel a crushing tension above their heads, so tense that even the child at the back seems to be holding in his tears.

Usually, Erwin prefers to spend his flights with a book in his hands, but he’s incapable for picking up the paperback and instead stares out of the window somehow hoping it will go faster.

After what feels like hours, the tight dress has gotten too uncomfortable for you to wear and you resolve yourself to eating the potatoes alone. You still don’t take off your lingerie, though. A two-piece black set with lace detailing that makes you look like a present ready to be unwrapped. It had arrived yesterday, and you had taken your sweet time admiring the embroidered flowers and soft ribbon holding the fragile piece together because you had falsely assumed that you wouldn’t have it on for long. You had in fact contemplated stockings but by the time 11PM came by you simply wrapped Erwin’s favourite robe around your body and tried to take your mind off things. Maybe you should have opted for your own robe because as the sleeves hung from your arms and the soft material effused his smell, it managed to make you feel even worse.

Staying up late was not a foreign feeling but anticipation quickly turns into boredom and you find your eyelids getting heavy. You pause the anime you’re watching and are about to shut your eyes when you hear the faint rattle of keys.

You stumble getting out of bed, knocking your shoulder on the wall before skipping four steps at a time and tripping on the robe at least twice as you rush downstairs. Erwin is barely through the door as you call out his name and he drops his bags right there to let your rush into your arms. You feel so small, so safe, so familiar, within them, as if you’ve returned to the space where you belong. He lifts you up to let you wrap your legs around his waist, your ankles barely crossing. He smells divine, even after hours of being stuck in an airport and his hair is still soft between your fingers. You look at him and the smile that spreads across his face wipes out any hints of fatigue that might have been there just moments ago.

Erwin kisses you and it’s long, deep, and he holds you impossibly closer to him as his tongue dips into your mouth. You don’t want it to end, but Erwin pulls back and says softly, “I’m home, my love.”

You can’t help but giggle. “Welcome home.”

You return to the kiss with a hint of desperation. Tugging lightly on Erwin’s shirt, you know he notices how your core is already warm, but still, he takes his time closing the door with his foot before finally noticing your attire. You’re about to make a sarcastic comment about his obliviousness but the way he looks down at you, at the small flower of lace peeping out from under the heavy robe, the way he slowly wets his lips, he leaves you speechless.

“You’re a gift.” He smiles sweetly though his eyes darken.

“Well, you’ve been working really hard,” You mumble. “You deserve a treat.”

The effect this man has on you is unbelievable. All that anger and frustration you had pent up now crumbles at the light caress of his thumb on your hips.

“Let me unwrap you,” Erwin says. And he walks you to your room, climbing up the stairs with ease as you cling onto him. You attempt to rub yourself against his hard stomach, but one look of warning makes you stop. He’s going to be doing things on his watch, tonight.

Setting you on the floor beside your bed, Erwin undoes the ribbon and you let the fabric pool at your feet. He immediately latches onto your neck, and you gasp, tilting your head to give him better access. His hands begin to roam, fingering the delicate lace of your panties and the straps of your bra as his tongue leaves a trail over your chest. It’s only when Erwin suddenly grabs your breast that you moan, body involuntarily pushing towards him.

He looks up through thick eyelashes and his hands moves to cup your face. You’re about to beg him to touch you where you need it most, but he whispers, “you’re so beautiful.” And you’re speechless again.

You suddenly lean in to kiss him, hands wrapping around his neck and it’s messy and your breath is short. “Please, Erwin,” you say to him between kisses. “Touch me.” You can feel him smile against your lips. “Please”. And before you can stop yourself. “I can’t do it myself.”

Erwin stills and only then do you realise your mistake. He pulls back and stands up straight, towering over you and you recognises that look. It’s the one of a lion who has just found a wounded deer.

“Oh?”

Fuck. He leans back and raises a brow expectantly and you try to look everywhere but at him. Maybe if you avoid eye contact, he’ll take it as a slip of the tongue. But your husband is not one to let things go. He’s intelligent, he knows exactly what you mean- you don’t need to speak for him to gather what happened, the image of you lying pathetically on the bed, hopeless and desperate. He smirks but stays quiet. Erwin likes it when you use your words.

“No-that’s not what I meant. I mean- you feel best and it’s just-“

You’re cut off by a hand on your scalp, pulling your hair back in one swift motion so that you have no choice but to look up at your husband dead in the eye.

“You were touching yourself whilst I was away, Y/N?”

“I-I mean...yeah…”

“I see.” His gaze is enough to make you gush. “And you weren’t able to make yourself cum.”

Your cheeks burn. It’s not a question, but you affirm it anyways. “No, no I couldn’t make myself cum.”

He’s silent for a moment and you’re not sure if it’s because he’s watching your worried face or because he’s wondering how he’s going to make that face look even more worried.

“I would feel sorry for you, but I suppose that’s what you deserve for touching my cunt without my permission.”

You gasp as he uses his grip on your hair to throw you on the bed. It’s effortless, the way his strength could so easily destroy you and yet he uses it to ruin destroy you in another way- just who you like it. Erwin undoes his tie and all you can do is gawk as he strips down to his boxers. He’s as hard as a rock and you tentatively reach out to touch him, but Erwin grabs your wrist. Without warning, you’re dragged to the other side of the bed where you’re placed to face your large floor length mirror. There’s only a moment of confusion before you understand why Erwin had been so keen on the somewhat awkward placement. He positions himself behind you and you withhold the urge to press your back against his throbbing cock.

“Don’t you take your eyes off the mirror,” Erwin commands, and you nod your head. “Use your words. Or do you need me to show you how to do that too?”

“Yes, sir,” You say quickly.

“Good girl.”

Erwin opens your legs, his hands gripping your thighs hard. You silently wish bruises bloom in their wake- it’s been too long since you’ve had your husband’s mark on you. A reminder of who you belong to. One hand stays on your thigh and the other moves to nudge your panties out of the way of your glistening cunt.

“I’m going to show you how to touch yourself,” He says in a low, rumbling voice. “And you’re going to watch closely and learn. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes sir.”

His fingers don’t tease your folds for long. Erwin is feeling merciful, because he simply gathers the slick coating your cut before immediately rubbing your clit. The moan that leaves your mouth is pornographic. You buck your hips but the hand on your thigh moves to pin you down, your body flush against his so that you can almost feel his bearing heart. You’re engulfed by him so small as he easily manipulates your body.

Erwin is overwhelmed by the options. Look at his wife unravel below him or stare at the mirror, where you have no place to hide.

“I should be punishing you, you know.” He presses his fingers down hard on a particularly tenter spot and you moan loudly. “But I need to show my dumb little girl how to take care of herself.”

“I-I’m not- ahhh.” Your back arches and Erwin captures your neck again, sucking viciously.

As his thumb continues its assault on your clit, two fingers find your tight hole, dripping and clenching around nothing. He can see in the mirror how your body is practically begging to be filled up. And fill you up he will. But first Erwin inserts a finger and groans at the warmth that greets him. He begins moving it and although you try to understand how he is able to stroke your cunt so perfectly, your mind is fogged and all that’s on your mind is your impending release. This should be a learning experience, but it serves only as a reminder of Erwin’s miraculous hands. He slips his second finger in and your moans only get lounder.

“Erwin, Erwin- they feel so good. Your fingers feel so good!”

You can see his smirk in his reflection, just before he speeds up and you have to grab his wrist to steady yourself. His fingers slam back and forth into your velvety walls. They suck them in, and he is able to find your sweet spot every time. Every single time. Your eyes roll back, you press against Erwin’s chest and your legs shake as you cum. The mess you make, leaking all over Erwin’s hands, your bed, your thighs- you try to look away, but he grabs your face to prevent you from doing so.

“Don’t you dare look away.” His voice is low, threatening. “Look how good I make you feel. Look.”

Your cheeks are flushed and the set that had made you look like a femme fatale, just hours before, is now yet another set that has has you pliant and submissive. “It seems that I’m the only one who can take care of you,” Erwin says. And you know he’s right.

Erwin lifts his soaked fingers to his mouth and his eyes flutter shut as he tastes you. When he opens them, you swear they’ve gone a shade darker. Wordlessly, Erwin slips from behind you to kneel in front of the bed. He removes your panties and holds them up to his nose, giving them a slight inhale before tossing them to the side and lowering his mouth.

“Erwin wai-“

And before you can warn him that your too sensitive- you orgasm was too strong, it’s too soon- his mouth has latched onto your cunt and Erwin is eating you out like a starved man.

“Ah-fuck, fuck, fuck,” You practically scream.

He sucks on your clit, his tongue doing what it does best. You look down, his eyes bore into yours and you know he’s remembering every expression you make as he pushes you over the edge. Despite your trembling arms struggling to keep you upright, your hand goes to grip Erwin’s hair and all you can think about is how soft it is before you cum again. Your husband doesn’t stop this time. His fingers dig into your soft hips to make sure you don’t move, to make sure that he catches everything on his tongue. And he can feel it before you do. The steady build-up of a feeling slightly familiar, but foreign enough that you warn Erwin too late. Your back arches and you squirt in his mouth and before your eyes roll back, you catch a glimpse of what you know to be a smirk in your husband’s eyes.

You can feel the sheets soak below you so try to press your legs together in somewhat of an attempt to hide the mess, but Erwin doesn’t let you. “Don’t be ashamed now, darling.” His voice is solid, domineering. “This is just you perfect body, doing exactly what I tell it to,” He says.

He could be talking about fruits and you would still nod your head dumbly.

The power Erwin has over you is addictive, and your body seems to know it too. As he kisses your thighs, licking off whatever didn’t find its way into his mouth, you can still feel a distant ache at your core. This time, you don’t need to use your words. As you lie weak on the bed, Erwin crawls over, engulfing your form. The lion is ready for his meal. He leans down to capture your lips in a gentle kiss. “I missed you,” He says. It’s the hundredth time, but you don’t tire of hearing it.

“I missed you too.”

Erwin shifts your legs, and you can feel the head of his large cock teasing your entrance.

“I missed all of you,” he repeats. “Your smile. Your voice. Your moans.” He pauses to place a kiss on your collarbone. “Your taste.”

He’s trying to be romantic, but you know why he stalls, and it makes you unable to graciously except the compliments. Erwin loves to hear you pine for him. And who are you to refuse your husband’s desires? So, you reach your hands out towards his shoulders, attempting to make him move if only a little bit. “Erwin!” You whine, and despite your weakness, you manage to push your hips forward, finding friction against his hard cock. “Please!”

Again, that smirk. He rubs against your clit. “My, my- you’ve come twice already and want more?”

Well, he missed your voice so you suppose you should let him hear it. “Let me be selfish, please sir?” You moan. “I need you inside of me.”

His cock twitches against you. And before you know it his hand is around your neck. “Such a good girl, using your words like that.”

He pushes inside you with a groan of relief, a low sound from his throat that causes his eyes to close momentarily.

It seems you’ve forgotten how big he is because as he stretches you out like it’s your first time, your mouth drops open and a string of curses emerges. Erwin would usually reprimand you for the foul language, but he’s too lost in the feeling of your tight cunt pulling him in. Using your neck as leverage, he squeezes tight so that he can push forward and when your eyes blur, overwhelmed with the pleasure and pain and the lack of oxygen intensifying it all, Erwin loosens his grip only slightly, and your eyes find his again. You don’t notice your mouth hanging open, too focussed on the way your body is accommodating Erwin’s cock again.

“Really big, ‘s really big, sir,” You mumble and Erwin grunts in response, his teeth clenching because he too is reminded yet again of how tight- how perfect- your body is for him.

When Erwin bottoms out, he stills for a moment, basking in your warmth and taking a moment to kiss your cheek, a gentle gesture compared to the hand still grasping your neck. Your cunt gushes despite you wincing about the pain, about his size, and soon he can’t help but move his hips. Erwin pulls back and thrusts deep. You scream him name, as you feel his cock dragging against your walls. Any idea of taking you gently has evaporated from Erwin’s brain and instead his hips snap back and forth violently, his tip kissing your cervix as he buries himself inside of you again and again.

His grunts are laboured as Erwin’s free hand pushes your leg up to your chest to allow him to thrust deeps and deeper. “Just like that- just like that, good girl. My good girl.”

The new angle has him brushing against your g-spot and you won’t last long. You know you can’t- not with him quite literally rearranging your insides. You have one hand clawing at his forearm and the other grips the sheets and you repeat a mantra of “Thank you, sir, thank you” in between your desperate moans. The honorific coming from your lips is too sweet to his ears and he’s reminded of why phone calls bother him so much- nothing compares to hearing your voice like this.

Erwin’s hand leaves your neck only to tug your bra down, letting your boobs bounce freely as he fucks you hard. You almost complain about the loss of contact but his tongue latches onto to your nipple and before you know it, you are coming all over your husband, screaming his name. Your nails dig into his arm as he nears his own release. Erwin’s hips stutter and he moans your name before throwing his head back in pure bliss as he cums inside of you. You wish you can capture that sight forever, but you don’t think any photo does your husband justice. It’s true- this is better than anything Hange could send.

Your breaths slowly find a slower rhythm in the post-orgasm silence. Erwin watches the way your fluids pool out of you as he pulls out, admiring the own mess on his lower stomach. You wince at the sore feeling and pull him towards you. This time, he follows your command. Breathless bodies mould into each other, finding their place after too long being apart. At the back of your mind, you know you should be making your way to the bathroom, but Erwin’s heavy body lying on your chest is enough to remind you to focus on the moment. For this is where you belong.

“You know, you should be flattered, Erwin.” You nudge his arm weakly as you lay together, bodies entangled in a random set of pyjamas you begrudgingly forced yourself to change into. “No one has better hands than you.”

He laughs. “I am flattered,” he says. “I just like teasing you.”

“No- you have a degradation kink.”

“Yes, that too.”

Even as you were taking a shower together, Erwin’s subtle attempts at having you admit you couldn’t make yourself cum did not go unnoticed. You suppose it’s an ego-thing, but then you realise it’s more. The power of being the only person able to bring you that much bliss is power Erwin thrives on. And despite the money wasted on your pink vibrator, you wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Still,” Erwin muses and a small smile plays across his lips. “I did expect the photo Hange took to at least help a little.”

Every muscle in your body stills and your eyes suddenly widen. Oh come on. You try to tell yourself that there’s simply nothing wrong with having a photo of your naked husband, but it’s more than that. You know it. Erwin knows it. And by the way he’s smiling, you also know that plastered on your face is the guiltiest of looks. In your poor attempt to escape his gaze by turning your back to him, Erwin chuckles and shakes his head, hugging you closer.

“That’s not fair!” You exclaim.

“It’s not?”

“No!”

You try to wiggle out of his grasp, but Erwin is made of steel. Why do you expect to get away with anything anymore? Erwin Smith is beyond two moves ahead- he’s finished the game before you’ve even started.

“Did you really think I didn’t notice?”

“Shut up!” You whine. “Why do you have to be such a smartass about it? Let me think I win.”

“Alright, alright.” Erwin chuckles and places a kiss on your forehead. “You’re my winner. Always.”

575 notes · View notes

stylistiquements · 3 years

Text

Day 1 : Soap Bubbles.

𐐪𐑂 Pairing : Sapnap x fem!reader {Playlist}

𐐪𐑂 Summary : You're being introduce to the internet in a peculiar way, it's up to you to decide what you're going to do with it.

𐐪𐑂 Word count : 1.4k | W: written part underneath

𐐪𐑂 Warning : very few swears

Masterlist | Previous | Next

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・　　 .・゜゜・　　・゜゜・

The coffee that sinks inside your stomach brings out a grimace and a click of your tongue where the taste stains; too bitter, too acidic but you’ll drink it anyway and to the last drop; there is something about the idea of spending time with three best friends that is so made of spring and honey that you wish to miss none of it.

“Someone is lurking,” George contemplates out loud, and the call goes silent for a second as if to look for the intruder. And it would so easy to flinch, to hit the back pedal, because you almost feel like one being exposed front stage like that. But today- today is not that day.

It's not that you don't want to join the discussion, it's that it takes a second to warm up, to absorb the energy and become one with it.

And sometimes, all it takes is Sapnap to exclaim, “Panini head, my beloved!” for your smile synchronizes with his chuckles. Somehow, once noticed by the right person, life flows back naturally.

George and Dream greets you in trailing unison, like two kids forced to greet their unwelcomed aunt on a sunday afternoon.

“H-hey troublemakers,” you finally say. Your voice is still quiet, not reluctant, but rather uncertain. It doesn't bother anyone.

“I’m beating Dream’s ass at chess and he’s bitter,” Sap explains, and you silently nod, as if they were able to see you.

A long silence follows along, rythmed by clicks of mouses and keyboards and it falls in your ears like high droplets. It's comfortable. It's intimate, shared with friends only.

"We haven't heard from you in a while," Dream says. "I mean ... before the clout fiasco."

You wouldn't exactly call it a fiasco, even though you don't really like the idea of being perceived a little too closely from the eyes of twitter.com, but you do agree anyway, "I've been caught up on college essays lately."

"That sucks," George probably adds.

“Good thing you’re here, then,” Dream notes, simple as a breath. “This is a worry-free zone.”

It hovers for a second, carried by George’s approval hum.

You squint suspiciously, detective mode, at the profile pictures that light on and off before your eyes, “Thanks, dream.”

He scoffs a “sure” and you’re not sure why you sense a bit of irony stuck on the back of his teeth. You're so tempted to call him out, but you don't. Instead, you write a mental note of this odd moment.

“It’s because I told him about your three brothers and now he’s scared they’re gonna find him and kick his ass,” Sap explains as if he just read your mind.

Sometimes, there’s this thing in the air, though you’re miles away. Something like a connection. There’s this thing when you don’t need to talk for Sap to understand. Sharing one brain cell, you dismiss ironically. Probably coincidences and predictability, but it always sounds a little special, a little like something you’d wish to be out of this world, like morning dew and fairy circles. And it makes you feel safe, at home, just like snuggling up in the sheets during a stormy night. Your smile washes up the sleeve of your hoodie, covered palm carefully hiding your chuckles.

“Three older brothers,” George muses, and there’s no telling if it’s something meant for you to hear. “That’s kinda scary.”

“You better be scared, one of them is probably your FBI agent,” you tease mindlessly, though there's nothing scary about those three grown men.

“I’m British, Bunny,” he points out. Whether the exasperation in his tone is fake or genuine, that, you can’t tell, but you play it cool, grin carved so deep it almost hurts. Dream’s wheezes rise and fall in the background.

“Say that to his face then,” you outbid smirkingly after a second of silence, heels growing into the carpet to make your chair spin slowly left and right, so breezily.

“I’d praise you for the rest of my life if you-Oooooooh your ass is wacked. Your ass is so wacked, dude. You fucked up so bad,” Sapnap chokes out between strings of giggles.

“Oh no, my streamer is losing his game?” You theatrically pout. “My streamer Dreamwastaken, have you met him? Guess you don’t need any of my brothers to kick your ass.”

“Okay yeah- no- it’s not my fault if your- they’re distracting me, okay?” Dream defends.

Slowly, the energy lowers again and the call remembers peace as Dream admits defeat.

“I’m not playing against you anymore,” he mumbles through greeted teeth, your hoodie shelters a muffled giggle. “Let’s talk about y/n’s twitter fame instead.”

“Let’s just not-” you mutter, both because seeing Dream lose at something is a miracle that has to be witnessed once and because you’re somewhat reluctant. “Let’s just not talk about that.”

“Yeah, sorry about that. I had no idea it would draw this much attention to you,” Sap admits.

“Well, you talk about her all the time it was only a matter of time before twitter finds out,” George taunts and you secretly smile, listening to the way your best friend tries to defend himself, mind flooded with the last memories you have of when you were able to see those chuckles for real.

“Yeah, Quackity already told me you guys talk behind my back,” you fakely muse. “That’s totally fine, I don’t wanna know what you guys are talking about at all.” It’s a lie, obviously, the idea creeps upon your mind with assumptions you can’t quite get a grip of nor let go.

“You and Quackity talk?’ Sapnap asks, hint of surprise, and you hum.

“Or rather, he talks to me. He keeps calling-.” Shit. The forsaken word traps itself into your mouth. It’s too silly anyway.

“Come on, just say it,” Dream pushes as if he knew too much, more than you even do, and your cheeks flush mindlessly. You don’t notice.

“Dream, quit it!” You demand.

“Quit what?”

“You talk as if you knew more than anyone did.”

“Maybe I just do,” he coos, so dream-like.

Oblivious or careless, Sapnap asks, “Is Quackity bothering you or something?”

“He-" you begin but stop to look for the right way to put it, "He triggers my flight or fight response.”

"I mean, duh," Sapnap probably rolls his eyes.

"But I like him. He's funny."

After a second of silence, George says, “Well that was unexpected.”

“Not so much, I think we’re both chaotic neutral people.”

“What is that neutral chaotic thing anyway?” Dream is confused.

Roll up your sleeve girl boss because now is your time to shine! You offer your best dream smp alignment chart to the classroom. They're speechless, but they listen carefully.

"Then you're more chaotic good than neutral. You're too sweet anyway," Sap says.

"I'd even say lawful good," George debates.

"That's because you haven't seen Bunny during her crazy cat hour."

"True," you note.

"She'll go absolutely batshit."

“What?" George burst between confusion and surprise. "We've never seen you like that."

"A lady never reveal her secrets," you retort. No one answer.

It leaves a second for your mind to enjoy peace. For your eyes to lay on c!tubbo on lawful good and think true, then on c!dream on chaotic evil and think also very true. You huff and it's like a wave; as sarcasm leaves your breath, an idea comes in.

"Sap, check your DMs," you request.

Surrounded by the evening lull, Sapnap’s laugh pops like soap bubbles, "God, you’re so stupid. Why can't you just marry me?"

“So, is it Sapnap approved?” You chuckle lightly to prevent Sapnap’s morning fresh laugh to fill your chest and leak everywhere.

“Just press ‘send tweet’ please,” he confirms with leftovers of a smile in his voice.

"George, get me out of here. They're doing it again," Dream whines.

"Doing what?" He asks, unbothered.

"Act like they're alone in the convo. Just get a room." And you don't get to stand up for yourself that you and your best friend are actually sent to another room.

"Well this one is chaotic evil confirmed," you mumble as you roll your eyes but the vibes are much peaceful, much more comfortable in here. "So ... hi."

"Hi," he chuckles in return.

Maybe that's for the best; a moment that needs to stay a little timeless, secretive and special. It hasn't happened in so long, you don't even remember the last time it did.

"I'm glad you're here. I miss you, you know?" He says, and it's hard to not feel so bittersweet about it. It's hard when longing involves a craved touch, a real smile and an eye contact. Your shoulder sinks in the chair a little harder.

"I miss you too. I'll be here soon," you promise. And soon couldn't come any sooner.

But the conversation, soft and free, will wash up any worries, as always, and you'll end up talking about everything and nothing, about streams and planned videos and college and god knows what. As long as it makes the two of you happy and smiling. Just like the old days, you'll both think and it's fair to say until the evening turns into night and night turns into fatigue.

"Are you sure you're okay about that clout?" He asks once again. "I know you don't like being exposed like that."

"Yeah, yeah don't worry too much about it. I'll try to make good use of it."

"I'm sure you will," he murmurs, but oh boy did he not know what was about to come until you two meet.

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・　　 .・゜゜・　　・゜゜・

Taglist : @open-minded-chip-101 ; @itsoakaa ; @gaysludge

A/N : so first of all it has come to my attention that 129 days from now on is actually my birthday so that's a weird coincidence lol. Hi how are you guys?? welcome to the first part I hope you liked it. I'm fairly new to the mcyt community and that's the first time I write for them, so bear with me. Feedbacks are always appreciated. Until next time (ɔˆ ³(ˆ⌣ˆc)

#sapnap smau #smau #mcyt smau #sapnap x you #sapnap x reader #sapnap x y/n #sapnap series #129 days #mcyt x you #mcyt x reader #sapnap fluff

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mystic-sky · 3 years

Text

|✨Part 1✨| |✨Part 2 ✨| of the Friends with Benefits Series.

Your relationship with Suguru started off somewhat unexpectedly. A new semester romance, however it was unwanted after dealing with Satoru Gojo just last year. You tried not to blame yourself for the situation unraveling the way it did. You did your best to make Satoru comfortable with you- at least you thought you did.

He cut you off as soon as you made your feelings apparent. You wondered if he somehow did it for your own good, or maybe there was something deeper that went along with it. No matter, you remained optimistic. You were young, and bound to make mistakes. This was just a story to tell your children about in the future if you ever felt it was necessary.

But back to Suguru, who had wiggled his way into your life somehow. He wasn’t a random guy actually. More like a familiar face you’d seen in a few of your classes because you both were in the same major. Just so recently, he decided to talk to you.

You weren’t expecting to hit it off with him so easily. He was sort of scary looking, which led you not to engage with him in the first place. He never tried talking to you before 5 months ago. And neither did you, considering you thought he was so handsome he’d break your heart too somehow.

His arms were sleeved with tattoos that would bridge at his chest. The tattoos would sometimes peak out of his wide collared shirts if he chose to wear one that day. He had a thing for wearing these huge ear gauges that had his favorite anime on them. Though, you never noticed until you sat close enough to him to see the designs. It was a rainy day, and both of you ended up sitting beside each other in your sociology course in the back of the classroom. You were both late, having come in just after the other.

It was weird seeing him this close. He never did come late to any class you’d ever been in with him. Even if you wanted to sit with him, like Satoru, he never had any available seats beside him. He didn’t disturb you until the lecture ended, commenting on one of your anime themed mechanical pencils. That sparked your first conversation with him, and he wasn’t shy to ask you out for coffee right after.

He’s been keen on you since, and you just barely give him the time of day in the beginning. You were just cautious, after the whole Satoru situation. Suguru was fine with whatever you wanted the situation between you both to be. But you will admit, the conversations he’d keep you up with at night made it hard to not fall in love with him.

He’d take you out to dinner, study with you, and sleep with you from time to time since the sexual attraction between you was hard to deny. You think your favorite thing about messing around with Suguru was how he’d always pick your brain after sex with manga theories and better endings than the canonically debuted ones. He was a really good cook, and you often challenged him to make your favorite dishes. They were excuses to invite you over to his place, so he gladly took each one with merit. It was friends with benefits but with far much more substance to hold onto.

He never poked you about getting serious. Whatever you both had was still young at barely 5 months. He could tell you’d been going through something mostly because of how you sexed him. Sometimes you were the dominant one- you’d throw him on the bed and bounce yourself on his length until your knees were far too tired to go on. Other times, he’d steal the show from you, showing you just exactly what he was capable of.

He spread you onto the desk in his bedroom, face deep into your folds. He also loved to spoil you, like Satoru, but you did your best not to think of him when you both were together. Suguru had so much more hair to grab, considering his tongue work was so good it scared you.

“Be a good kitten and cum for me.” He said between sucks on your clit. You often couldn’t think, and that was a good thing. He numbed you in plenty of ways, he knew he had been helping you get over something. He had been doing the same thing but you could care less.

“Actually, I changed my mind.” He tore his mouth from your steaming sex, wiping his chin. You gasp as he lifts you up off the desk, holding your body without leaning against anything for support. You felt weightless, feeling his length prod at your entrance. You tried to hold back a giggle as he smiled smugly at you.

“You ready?” His eyes were sincere, asking for your consent again as he was aching to sink you onto himself.

You nod, feeling a bit nervous. “Stuff like this is about balance. Start flailing around again and I’ll drop you.” He teased. Your hands found some of his hair again, tugging on it a bit.

“Just fuck me.” You roll your eyes as he slams his length into you, making you cry out and clutch your arms around him. His large hands firmly grasp underneath your thighs, using the way your ass recoiled against his thighs to keep a steady rhythm. He’s immersed in the way your broken moans pour into his ear, fueling his stamina. He’s a stickler for teasing you the entire time, praising you for taking his length so well.

“Such a good kitten, you’re taking it so well.”

It was the third time he’d ever held you up to fuck you. After letting go of the fear of him dropping you it became incredibly easy to focus on the pleasure.

“You’re gonna cum aren’t you? Don’t worry about the carpet baby, make a mess for me.”

He knew how to mix things up the way you needed. On your rough days he’d sex you slowly, more passionately and generously. If you were happy and feeling frisky he’d fuck you accordingly. He was pretty good at reading your body just after the first few fucks you had. You hated comparing the two men, but it did happen from time to time when you were in solitude, plagued by your own self-deprecating thoughts every now and then.

It was weird how they emanated each other’s personalities in certain ways. And then you found out that they used to be good friends in high school until something happened. You never poked Suguru about it, since he’d seem to get irritated when you were around groups of friends and Satoru’s name was mentioned. You did your best to be satisfied with what you had. He was handsome, smart, and possibly wanted to be your boyfriend in due time.

But you couldn’t help but think about Satoru. Not only was your experience with him a wild one, but he was fucking everywhere. It’s always like this for you. It’s not until you’re trying to avoid someone do you begin seeing them absolutely everywhere.

You stared at Satoru over Suguru’s shoulder, poking your cheek with your tongue. The audacity he had, showing up in the cafe where you both first met while you and Suguru were on a routine study date. Well, it was a hotspot for a lot of students, so who are you to say he can’t come in here.

“I think I’m overworking myself today, we can go eat now.” Your mood change was evident to Suguru, but he couldn’t put his finger on why at first. He watched you get up and pack your things before shortly following.

As you tossed your bag over your shoulders, he took hold of one of your hands, squeezing firmly. He pressed a sweet kiss to your forehead, tilting your chin up to meet his gaze.

“Is it something I can cheer you up from when we get back to my place?” Suguru was a bit smug about it, and also painfully intuitive about your emotions even though you’d been close for such a short time. Your cheeks went red, eyes burning holes through the floor.

“It’s nothing, really. Let’s just get out of here.” You manage to look back at him, just barely glancing at Satoru who probably had been looking in this direction. Suguru pressed another kiss to your forehead, wrapping his arm around you and leading you out the cafe. He nearly touched shoulders with Satoru and his own dame, smirking just loudly enough for him to hear.

Suguru wasn’t dumb, finally having noticed your energy change just a few moments after Satoru Gojo entered the cafe. This was your favorite place, and he hated how someone could ever ruin that for you. He felt urged to do something about it- with or without your consent. He doesn’t poke you about it until you’re in the car.

“Random question, but do you know Satoru Gojo?”

The question like a pin in your spine, making you visibly un-slouch in the drivers seat. He doesn’t look at you, feeling that would make it easier for you to talk. You take this the wrong way, and feel even more tense.

“I do, we were a thing at one point.” You manage not to stutter. You had no idea why you felt scared or touchy about the subject- you shouldn’t be. His entire vibe had changed, and he didn’t have his usual grin peaking at the corners of his lips.

“Oh,” he says simply. The longest ten seconds of silence reign throughout the vehicle. You’re anxious to turn on the radio, anything to rid the first bit of awkwardness the two of you had ever shared.

“He’s an asshole, isn’t he?” He randomly chuckles heartily, somewhat calming you.

“Yeah,” you’re exhaling properly now, “he really is.”

“We were best friends for about four years. I know him like the back of my hand. Granted, he’s probably changed a lot since high school.”

“But you’re both so-

“Different?” He chuckled. “Yeah, I know.”

“If he was an asshole then, he’s multiplied tenfold.” You roll your eyes. “You both don’t talk anymore?”

You knew they didn’t, but you took the opportunity to ask anyway.

“Nah, he’s a slimy bastard. I hope karma turns him rotten.” You’d never seen Suguru scowl before. He must really hate him, you thought. Still, what a small world; first Satoru and now his ex best friend.

“You still talk to him?” He pokes again. His tone is just barely playful. God, you changed your mind. You didn’t want to talk about this anymore.

“No, we don’t talk anymore. It ended pretty badly.” You say simply. You also decided not tell Suguru that the both of you messed around just before you started messing with him.

“Sorry about that. If we were friends sooner I’d have told you about him.” Suguru is apologizing for something you weren’t entirely ignorant about in the first place. You knew what you were getting into.

Satoru never tried to convince you the situation was anything other than what it was— until the end. The sweet things he started saying to you during those final months often echoed in your head- like he meant all of it.

The sex developed into something that it shouldn’t have. Sex that passionate should be forbidden if you aren’t already in love. And the things he said to you the last time he dropped you off didn’t make it any better. You wanted to slap his stupid, pretty face.

“I’m over it now.”

Suguru pans his gaze to watch you nonchalantly staring out the window. He knew better than to ask anymore. He was more elated that you didn’t interact with him at all. He didn’t need Satoru painting a picture about him in your head before he could first.

What sucks the most about dating people you go to school with is how often you’d see them. Satoru was fucking everywhere. The local restaurants, the library, the cafe, and he’d registered for two of your classes this semester. He didn’t speak to you at all, but he was always just there. Perhaps he’d always been around but since you’d been involved with him you were more aware of his presence.

You were standing in line in the library, attempting to return some books. He entered the space, and walked up behind you, standing on the line and giving your space. You turn your body slightly, peering up at him. You thought to leave, but just because you resented him didn’t mean you were going to cower every time you had to be around him for a while. You let out a sigh as you tip toed to peer in front of yourself; at least the line was moving.

Both of you had made it to the front, talking to separate librarians beside one another. When they both got up from their seats to head towards the back, he spoke directly to you, without actually looking at you.

“(Name), word of advice— I’d steer clear of Getou Suguru if I were you.”

Anger poured over you; you did your best to keep your voice low and eyes forward when saying this.

“That’s the first thing you say to me after almost a year? Go fuck yourself.”

He bites back a witty response, poking his cheek with his tongue. “Whatever. Find out the hard way.”

“You’ve got a lot of nerve. Why the fuck are you telling me this?” You’re whisper-shouting, considering it’s a library.

“Because,” he turns to look at you, “I care about you.”

“What a load of shit.”

Satoru Gojo doesn’t care about anyone, you learned that the hard way.

He let out a sigh. He knew he had no right, but even if he couldn’t get you back, he wanted you to know what kind of guy you were seeing. He couldn’t say anything, he knew you wouldn’t listen. Not like this anyway. Both librarians returned, and gave you back your borrowing passes. You quickly departed, refusing to give Satoru another opportunity to speak to you. His words stuck with you on the way home. You didn’t have any reason to be afraid of Suguru, right?

Two months had passed since Satoru had “warned” you about Suguru. And nothing has happened to lead you to be cautious of him. Satoru hasn’t spoken to you either.

You’re sitting in the guidance counselor’s office as it’s the end of the semester once again. You typed away on your phone, telling Suguru you’d see him for dinner in a bit before throwing your head back and shutting your eyes. The heaviest sigh left your lungs, you were thankful the semester was nearing its end. You had quite enough of studying and needed to unwind.

You feel a presence on the end of your bench, making you open one eye. You see white tresses, and you catch the scent of familiar cologne.

Satoru doesn’t look at you, but he’s quite aware that he’s sitting beside you as well. You almost scoff, only crossing your arms and legs. Noticing the undone laces of your boots, you lean forward to tie it. Your loose bag on your shoulder which unfortunately wasn’t zipped, spilled small notebooks and pencils all over the floor. Spare change rolled across the walk way along with other items.

“Fuck...” you muttered. His head snapped towards you as you let out a sigh and bent down to pick up your things. Your phone that was your on your lap hit the ground as well. You saw his hand in the corner of your eye reaching down to help.

“I got it.” You say sternly, and shamelessly picking up your things. He retracts his hand, and instead gets up to pick up the items that were further away from you, ignoring your request not to help.

He sits back beside you, handful of change and pens. He holds it up towards you quietly while you attempt to fix your bag back to the way it was. You turn to look at him for what feels like the first time in forever, blue eyes pouring into your own (eye color) ones.

“I didn’t need you to do that.” You say, taking your things. You initially thought to take your things from him without a word. He went back to staring in front of himself, waiting to be called. You shifted uncomfortably, and fidgeted with your fingernails. You forced yourself into to pay attention to the soft music playing from the back of the office until he spoke.

“How have you been?”

For some odd reason though, you wanted him to say something to you. You had a lot of things to let off your chest considering the way things ended. You thought of giving him a piece of your mind right there in front of all the staff members, but you restrained yourself.

Instead, you found yourself saying “I’m doing great.”

“That’s good.” He says nervously, rubbing the back of his neck. He didn’t even sound sure of his own response. A few minutes of silence resumes after. You’re a bit startled when speaks again.

“I’m definitely out of line right now, but I’ve been wanting to talk to you about some things.”

“What could we possibly have to talk about?” A lot. You were bubbling over.

“There’s a lot of things, at least for me, that I’ve never really told you.” He’s looking at you now. “Can we talk somewhere quieter? Whenever you’ve got the free time, and only if you want to.”

He was offering closure to you a bit too late. Or maybe all this time you’d convinced yourself you’d moved on. You often found yourself replaying the morning he brought you home and all the things you should’ve said in that moment.

That’s not exactly moving on. Unfortunately, you also found yourself comparing him to Suguru more often then not. That’s not moving on either.

“Okay,” you said. “Later on today. Round 8pm.”

He looks thankful. Just as he spoke, your counselor called out to you to come into their office. You stand up, looking down at him.

“Cafe then?” He suggests.

“That’s fine. See you.” You shrugged. You didn’t care that much for the place. You heard him say goodbye as the door shut behind you.

You had half a mind to never speak to him ever again. Though both of you were using each other, he knowingly crossed a line, making you feel things for him in a situation where feelings weren’t supposed to be involved. And he never gave you a chance to truly address the situation. Now, almost a year later, he’s ready to speak to you on his own terms. You’d be sure to tell him you had no intentions of making amends with him. If you personally didn’t have interest in what he had to say, you wouldn’t bother gracing him with the ability to explain anything to you.

You would’ve made him suffer. He’s lucky you’re still a bit distraught about the situation. Any longer into your situation-ship with Suguru and Satoru wouldn’t even have the slightest chance at something like this.

Dinner with Suguru was transparent. He could tell something was on your mind but he didn’t pry much after his first attempt. The last time you both talked about Satoru he turned into a different person, and it didn’t sit right with you. You did your best to brush it off, assuming he was just protective over you. But Satoru’s warning in the library echoed in your subconscious more and more. Just what happened between them, and would it be okay for you to ask Suguru about it?

He wasn’t your boyfriend either, but you suppose he wanted to be? You hadn’t brought up the dating conversation in while and you probably wouldn’t until you situated the Satoru thing.

“You know you can talk to me about anything, right?” Suguru’s holding your face, brushing your hair out of your eyes. His smile is incredibly gentle and you feel guilty for keeping this from him.

Perhaps you should hold Suguru accountable too, for being so sweet to you like this. He informed you he wouldn’t up and leave unless you wanted him to and that he’d never say anything he didn’t mean. But after dealing with trauma from past relationships, affection like this was always perceived cautiously.

“I know,” you say, feeling his lips press against your forehead again. “It’s just not easy to talk about right now.”

“That’s alright,” he assures you. “I’m here whenever you’re ready.”

His lips connect with yours while his hands slide down your back. He feels you relax a bit, and that makes him smile. How could he possibly be a bad person?

“I’ll call you when I get home, okay?”

You nod, watching him part from you and get into his car. You never did come to understand how he could afford it; a black Mercedes Benz-Coupe. You assumed that and his nice apartment were inherited wealth from his parents.

You wave at him before going into the station. Luckily he had things to attend to, and you didn’t have to bother making up anything about tonight. It was just barely any of his business, right?

You had an idea of what to expect from Satoru when you got there. You were rehearsing things you wanted to say in your head, some of them incredibly mean. You wanted to hurt his feelings too, if you had it in you. It didn’t take you long to get to the cafe, and you’d arrived early, already finding Satoru in the very back, furthest away from people. You gripped your bag strap, before sitting across from him.

“Hey, you’re early.” He says surprised, looking up at you from his phone.

“You’re the early one.” You say, not even cracking a smile.

“How are you?”

“Same as earlier. What did you want to talk about?”

He’s visibly gulping, and you’ve never seen him this nervous. He places his phone face down on the table, turning the sound off. You cross your arms.

“Right,” he lets out a heavy sigh. “Where should I start?” He attempts to gather his thoughts, rubbing his sweaty palms on his jeans.

“I’m not the kind of guy who really addresses his feelings, if you couldn’t already tell at the time we, you know... I’ve been fucked over a lot. I don’t have a lot of actual friends, and I’m constantly aware that people cling to me for my money or looks.”

He never acted like his entourages bothered him per se, but you did notice that he never bothered being around people anymore when the two of you were a thing. You prompt him to continue with your eyes.

“The only best friend I’ve ever had used me until I realized what was going on and cut him off. The first girl I ever really loved chose him instead of me shortly afterwards. Obviously, it’s not a legitimate excuse to have treated you the way that I did, but I guess what I’m saying is that I’m cautious of people and have been for a long time now.”

“But I never tried to use you,” you interjected. You felt a bit insensitive for spitting it out like that, but he really did hurt you.

“I know, and I realized that a bit too late.” He sighs. “But more importantly, I realized that I didn’t talk about or convey my feelings correctly. I know I confused you a lot, and you didn’t deserve that at all.” He tried to keep eye contact with you when he spoke, but your lion like force was pretty strong.

“And when I dropped you off— I shouldn’t have said those things to you. You were so much more than a warm body to me. You were the first real friend I’ve had in a long time. Things got so cloudy for me since we were sleeping together. I didn’t know how to address it, and it freaked me out when you told me you wanted more. I should’ve been elated, but I suppose I didn’t want my heart broken again either.”

“So basically...” He breathed out, “I’m really sorry. I’ve got some messy emotions, things I’m gradually learning to deal with. I’m not making excuses for myself. It’s just I never did talk about myself much when we were a thing, so I wanted to tell you something at least, and apologize. I hated the way I left things. I know it’s long overdue for an apology but...”

“But?”

“I still have feelings for you. I never stopped. The more time passed, the harder it made it for me to apologize and tell you how I feel. And then I noticed you were going out with... him, so I thought it was too late. But I still wanted to try, I guess.”

He looked so awkward, you almost laughed. Apologies were definitely foreign to him. You could tell he meant it, but even so, he wouldn’t be getting a relationship out of you, if that’s want he wanted.

You let out a large sigh. For some weird reason all the angry things you wanted to say wouldn’t come out. You wanted to be angry at him but you just couldn’t. And your heart was swelling at the idea of him still having feelings for you. Did he really mean that?

“We’re not together. Not yet anyway— it’s complicated.” You crossed your legs and leant back in your seat. Suguru probably would’ve been your boyfriend already if you weren’t so stuck on Satoru.

“Oh,” he said quietly. You’d never seen him look so small, it was definitely out of character for him.

“I forgive you,” you lean forward, holding your head in your hands. All this time and you still had soft spot for him.

“Really?” He’s surprised. Your friends will be too after you tell them this story.

“You want me to take it back?” You’re pinching the bridge of your nose.

He chuckles nervously. “No ma’am.”

“Are you... doing okay though?” He probes after noticing the stress in your brows.

“I can’t stay mad at you. And I want to so bad. It’d make my life simpler. Now I’m conflicted.” You drag your fingers under your eyes, before smooshing your own face, stressfully so. He thought you were cute, but he felt bad being the source of your distraught-ness.

“So I take it you still have feelings for me?” His voice is regular now, and just barely his normal cocky tone.

You won’t even look at him. “I mean...”

How do you explain to him that the only reason you’re messing with someone right now, who just so happens to be his ex-best friend, is because you were trying to forget about him in the first place?

“I get it if you don’t.” He says. “It’s been a while.”

“I do.” It’s almost instinct for you to correct him. “That’s the problem.”

“Ah, I see.” He’s rubbing the back of his neck again. You wished you could start over with a clean slate. School and dating shouldn’t be this difficult.

Satoru thought to warn you again about Suguru in that moment, but he held his tongue. He didn’t want to make it seem as if he was badmouthing him so you could favor him more, he wanted you to lean towards him naturally, if possible.

Silence reigned throughout your little booth in the cafe. The sound of rain hitting the window screen made it easy not to talk so much. It also made it hard to see a certain black, long-haired male in his Mercedes Benz, parked just across the street.

Suguru threw his cigarette out the driver’s window, continuing to watch the both of you inside. He shook his head disappointedly before starting his car.

“And that reminds me,” you say, making Satoru swallow hard and shift in his seat.

“What was that nonsense two months prior, about Geto Suguru?”

#gojo satoru #geto suguru #gojo x reader #gojo smut #gojo satoru x reader #geto smut #geto suguru x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jjk gojo #jjk #jjk x reader #gojo sensei #getou fluff #a lot of it

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moonbaby26 · 3 years

Text

Title: What’s in a Name?

Pairing: Peter Maximoff x Reader

Summary: Continuation from last chapter. You and the others are finally homeward bound, flying back to the U.S. from the events in Egypt and Greece. You get to hear a little more about Peter’s eastern European roots while passing time on the plane together.

Warnings: None, just fluff and Peter being Peter.

Notes: I know where some things I’m referencing don’t match the comics. Blend of comic canon and the movie version going on here.

Chapters: Previous Chapter Here

Taglist: @drikawinchester , @n0obmaster69 , @alexloveskili , @what-a-silver-lining , @bluesprings18 , @weakmoony-stuff , @slytherinsi-mp , @wintwrsoldiwr , @tommy-braccoli , @amourtentiaa , @cringingmemeries , @bi-panicatthe-disco , @himbos-are-my-lifeblood , @simp4mcuwomen

Peter Maximoff x Reader Masterlist

—————————

The morning sun was still low and red on the horizon as you’d stepped back out into the open air of the flight deck. But seagulls were already calling from somewhere up above as men milled around, checking and readying a set of helicopters that you knew would soon be taking you ashore.

You wouldn’t miss this boat itself of course, none of you belonged here after all. But you’d be lying to say it’d been easy to let go of Peter when morning had come. You’d woken up far more tangled than you remembered going to sleep as, chest to chest, his good leg wrapped over you and one of his hands somehow far up the back of your shirt.

The longest part of getting ready had been the procrastination of leaving that bed. After that, it only seemed like minutes before you were all awkwardly standing up here now, waiting on next instructions. It wasn’t as if you’d had anything you could pack after all. Besides that somewhat silly polaroid picture you’d seen Peter carefully stowaway in one pocket of his shorts, you had no possessions to speak of here. Even the shoes they’d given you were some poorly fit military boot. The tops of them scraped against your ankles as you walked and you’d be glad to be rid of them whenever possible.

The Professor and Moira approached after another moment, Moira hurrying a little more as one of the helicopters began to fire up, followed by the other soon after. She had to speak louder over the rising noise of the blades rotating faster and faster.

“Keep these on you!” She called, going to each of you in turn, handing over a U.S. passport with a driver’s license closed separately inside. She only opened them briefly to check that she was matching each to the correct person. “The flight we’ll be taking is just a commercial plane. The government has contracted them and dictated the pickup and landing points, but it’s civilian pilots and flight crew. Normal security still applies, but only those with U.S. citizenship are allowed aboard.”

As she’d gotten to you and Peter, she’d handed both passports to you as you’d had your hand outstretched, and he’d still been holding on to his crutches. You quickly opened one just to see which was yours, so you could pocket only your own. The first one opened was his however, but even in the low light of early sunrise, your brain hitched on something unexpected.

The picture looking back at you was clearly him, albeit a little younger, and with slightly longer hair than the way he wore it currently. But that wasn’t the issue. You reread the name printed in front of you more than once, before glancing up to him as if to confirm.

It said Pietro Django Maximoff.

“Your real name isn’t Peter?” You asked, even over the helicopter noise before you could stop yourself. But the realization was already dawning on you almost before that last word left your mouth that so many people were called one name by friends and family even if their legal name may still be another. You felt a bit stupid then for your reaction, instantly wishing you could take the question back.

But thankfully he only leaned in with a smile, taking his passport and license from you even as he spoke right against your ear. “Define real.” He pocketed them, before continuing. The helicopters were at their full ready now. “But it’s a bit loud here, babe. I’ll tell you all you want to know about my sexy alter ego later, deal?”

—————————

By the time you’d gotten to the airstrip on shore, it was full morning sun now. And just as Moira had said, there was already a large U.S. commercial jet waiting there. You also found out you weren’t alone, as you’d had to join a line of people already waiting to board. They were checking credentials as people moved up one by one onto a mobile stairway that had been rolled up flush with the plane’s open door.

Looking around you, most of the would be passengers still looked like military of various branches though. Army, Navy, Air Force, they still had on their uniforms. But there were others too, likely diplomats being evacuated you thought. Men, women, even a few children as you’d seen the curious eyes peeking out from behind their parents’ legs as you all had also moved through the line.

“It had to be damn stairs,” Peter mumbled as the two of you neared closer to the plane. Without any actual terminal here, boarding straight from the tarmac was the only option.

“If Hank can help carry the Professor up them, wheelchair and all, I’m pretty sure I can handle you.” You responded, only meaning to give him a little grief.

But he just spun things right back on you of course. “Oh, you can handle me any time.”

And when your stare said you didn’t seem to find that quite as funny as he did, he only shrugged, still smiling. “Sorry, you left yourself wide open for that one.”

“I did.” You admitted. “But I still want to hear the story of that driver’s license. And why did you even have one to begin with? Seems a little unecessary.” You said, still moving up every few moments as you neared the bottom of the stairs.

Yet he just kept smirking at you, almost a seeming delight in his eyes then, realizing that you were that curious about it. “Now who’s impatient?” He taunted, just before turning back to flash said documents to one of the workers now checking them.

“Do you have anything to declare?” The woman asked him.

With the way he paused, you knew his brain was churning then to select whatever he would deem the funniest or wittiest response. But as odd of looks as you were all already getting, mostly from Hank and Kurt’s vivid blue skin as usual, it probably would be best not to test the waters any further. You did want to get home after all.

“We don’t,” You answered before he could, relieved when she seemed to want to hurry you all aboard and away from her as much as you did. She handed Peter’s passport back to him, then took your own in quick succession to glance it over as well before seeming satisfied enough as she handed it back to you.

After you were past her, it was the issue of the stairs however. Obviously they expected Peter to just figure it out, but you knew you could lend a hand. The trick was going to be in trying to keep that act of levitation a little more subtle though, still being in mixed company here.

“You should have let me have a little more fun with her,” Peter said, though glancing back with some curiosity as you moved behind him.

“I don’t want to make a scene,” you responded quietly. Really, referring to her just as much as what you were about to attempt. “Pretend you’re going up the stairs anyway. Move a little like you’re walking.”

The person in front of him on the stairs wasn’t looking back, and only more of your friends were directly behind you. With the sidewalls of the stairway also going up about waist high, the people still on the ground couldn’t see the little glow that went around his legs as you willed him to levitate just high enough that his cast didn’t drag the steps as you both continued towards the plane’s door.

“Woah, hey at least give a warning.” He responded, lifting his good leg up enough for it to also miss the now passing steps even as his crutches hit once or twice.”

“I did.” You answered, though still trying to look past him the whole time to make sure no one was looking back from the plane’s doorway. Once you’d gotten nearly to the top, you set him back down to do the last couple steps on his own and enter the plane normally.

Once inside though, the aisle really was too narrow to use his crutches properly. Maybe on a more normal flight more measures would have been taken to assist the disabled, but there sure wasn’t anyone offering anything today.

Kurt was behind you, and offered to take the crutches while Peter put one arm over your shoulders and you both half hobbled, half shimmied awkwardly down the aisle until you reached the first open seating.

Being a larger jet meant for transoceanic travel, there were seats in groups of three on both the left and right side of the plane, but a row of four in the center as well. You ended up in one of the rows of three on the side, letting Peter take the aisle seat to have more room for his leg, while you sat in the middle, and Kurt beside you at the window as he’d laid Peter’s crutches down on the floor underneath the seats.

You finally felt like maybe you could relax a little then, just glancing around a bit. There were some old magazines in the seatback in front of you, but probably not much of anything else any of you could really do now in however many hours it’d take to get stateside. You were pretty sure a passenger jet like this would be a good deal slower than the high tech military one you’d gone to Egypt in.

You were only looking up at the light and air vent controls above your seat next as a sudden movement and curse surprised you as your eyes darted back to the aisle.

“Goddamnit.” A man said.

His soft sided suitcase had just burst open, spilling most of his clothing onto the floor as he then paused to shove it back in as best he could. He struggled with the zipper a moment, but it only slid back and forth uselessly, no longer sealing the bag back. “Cheap ass government issue,” He added, finally just picking up the whole thing and holding it closed against his chest as he walked on.

And that random event would have been nothing more to you, except for the way you saw Peter move his head back then, sucking in a pained breath through his teeth as he gripped the armrest between you.

Kurt noticed too, leaning forward as he asked, “Are you alright, Peter?”

“Yeah, sure,” He grunted.

But as you glanced down to see Peter’s other hand now clutching his broken leg, you also saw a newly materialized pair of sunglasses pressed between his fingertips and the cast. As well as a military jacket now folded messily under his seat.

“That was you.” You spoke abruptly, yet low enough just for the three of you. “You took those out of that man’s suitcase!”

“Well I didn’t think the stupid zipper was going to break when I tried to close it back! He’s right, that was a cheap zipper.” Peter admitted.

“And you hurt yourself trying to get back into the chair didn’t you?” You chided a little more, not quite sure what was worse, the thievery or the recklessness.

“I hit my foot on that damn bracket, and the vibration went through the bone.” He motioned to the metal bracing that bolted the seat in front of him to the floor.

“Thou shalt not steal,” Kurt said, not judgmentally, but just as if this should be an inherent truth as he still looked to Peter with concern.

“Oh man, so I get like twelve hours of flight time to look forward to, trapped next to you two goody two shoes then? Awesome.” He joked back, though already looking back down then at the sunglasses in his hand with a little admiration. They had a mirror finish as he spun them over in his fingers. “And hey, you guys are the ones who burned up my last jacket back in Egypt, remember? I’m not going home empty handed. I’d been wanting one of those army looking deals since we got here. Buzzcut there seemed like he’d have one.”

“Mama look!”

All three of you paused your talk then to see a small boy now standing in the aisle as the movement of people had slowed once more with passengers stopping to put their luggage in the overhead bins. But his mother didn’t seem to be paying him any mind as he continued to point. She was talking to the man in front of her as that man fought with an oversized suitcase.

The boy continued staring though, likely at Kurt. But it wasn’t really a fearful gaze, more excited than anything.

“Guten tag,” Kurt said cheerfully regardless, just waving in return.

And at that the boy’s eyes really went wide. “Sprichst du Deutsch?” The boy stammered a little, yet with the biggest grin.

“Ja, ich komme aus Bayern.” Kurt replied.

And that spontaneous connection over a surprise shared language would have been truly adorable too if Peter wasn’t suddenly leaning right over you to interrupt it.

“Yo, Kurt, ask him if I can borrow some of his markers!” Peter pleaded abruptly.

“What?” You and Kurt both said almost simultaneously.

“The markers, he doesn’t need the whole box. I only need like three colors, tops.” Peter answered, motioning back to the boy. And when still neither you or Kurt seemed to understand this sudden sense of urgency, Peter actually put his hands together like making a little prayer. “You told me you didn’t want me to steal, so I’m trying not to. Come on, at least a red one?”

Kurt really was confused then, but he did lean forward, saying something else in German to the boy.

At that request the boy did look down at the coloring book rolled in one of his hands, and the small pack of markers sticking out of his pocket that evidently Peter had somehow put a target lock on.

But he really did like Kurt apparently as after only a couple moments of thought, the little boy opened the marker box to pull three out.

“Sweet!” Peter said as the child handed over red, black, and blue to him. “I’ll give them back in a bit, right?” Peter added though, smirking at him. “Thanks, little dude.”

And it was all just the oddest thing to you as the boy only happily waved bye to Kurt after, the movement of people starting again as he and his mother continued on to go sit a few rows further back.

“I don’t even know what just happened,” you said after they were gone.

“That was world class negotiating, babe. I mean Kurt literally just smooth talked some colors from a kid with a coloring book in his hand on a twelve hour flight.” Peter responded.

“You are actually going to give them back though aren’t you? You told him you would.” Kurt replied with a little concern.

Peter kind of shrugged, “I mean yeah, I guess so.”

“He’ll give them back,” You added for him. “Or I will.”

“Okay, okay, jeez. Yes, it’s not going to take me hours to do anything. Ever. I’ll have this baby gussied up in no time.” Peter responded, patting his cast gently. “You can’t leave a blank canvas to a guy like me. Especially if I have to stare at this thing for weeks.”

And he was right, you weren’t even in the air yet before he just started doodling away.

————————————

Thankfully the plane only stopped one more time, at an air base in France to pickup more U.S. government evacuees, before at last the wings were over water and you were finally pointed home.

By now Peter’s cast looked more like those advertisements or example sheets on the walls of any tattoo parlor. Yet when you made a comment as such, the sly grin you got in return made you instantly wish you’d thought that through a little better.

“Ah, so you’ve been in a tattoo parlor then?” Oh he was so interested in this topic now. You could see that wolfish look coming into his eyes. “You’ve got some ink somewhere?”

“I don’t.” You’d thought of doing it though, quite a bit actually. But it was such a commitment. You’d probably keep that tidbit to yourself for a while though, lest he try to drag you immediately to a tattoo shop on the drive to D.C.

“I’m not totally sure I believe you.” He answered, though leaning in to whisper in your ear after, “Think you’ll let me check some time?”

The fact that he was still so bold with Kurt literally right beside you, made you wonder if you really should be making sure whatever rental car you ended up with later was just some sort of bucket seat tiny two door thing. If it was a boat like sedan with a full bench back seat, you might actually be in trouble tonight.

“We’ll see,” Is all you answered back though. At least for a moment before you realized now was as good a time as any to flip the conversation back on him.

“So when do I get to hear the Pietro story?” You asked, relaxed into your seat as much as the small space would allow. “Kurt and I have nothing else to do. Let’s hear it.”

“The who?” Peter teased back, just working on giving one of the pin up girls he’d drawn a little better shading.

“Or Django. Either Pietro or Django, they both sound pretty interesting I think.” You replied playfully.

Peter glanced at you, but smiled a little. “You’re just going to be disappointed actually. I was just hyping it up, there’s really nothing to it.”

“Then go on, it’ll be a quick story then.” You still wanted to know more about him of course, and every piece was just another part of the whole picture.

“Django was my grandfather. Mom’s dad back in the old country.” Peter replied, still just finding more and more little details to add to his drawings. “I didn’t really know him. Mom never liked to take us back there much to visit. I mean it makes more sense now of course. She didn’t want my Dad to know where she was. But back then I just figured she thought that place was creepy.”

“What place?” Kurt asked innocently enough. You both were actually equally curious to whatever Peter might say about his family. Like he’d said before, Kurt wasn’t used to having friends his own age. And learning more about each other now was all part of growing those bonds.

“Wundagore Mountain,” Peter replied. “And trust me, as much as it sounds like the newest ride at some amusement park, it’s totally not. I remember being like five and going back there thinking Dracula himself was going to yank me out of that freaking soviet tin can Mom was driving us around in. Wanda still swears she heard voices up there. I mean I don’t know, we stayed with Mom’s aunt one time and she tells us this thing so creatively called Man-Beast was going to come down off the mountain for us if we didn’t behave.”

Peter glanced over to the both of you, further clarifying, “Not like Hank or anything though, it was basically just a werewolf I think. But if it’s a werewolf, call it that you know? What the hell is a Man-Beast? They had so many weird things that could take children. I feel like every story was, oh but don’t do that or Porga will get you. Oops, you talked back to your mother? Guess Tagar is coming tonight. Darn, forgot to brush your teeth? Nice knowing you, kid, Bova’s going to take you to live in the woods forever now.”

You were sort of just staring and listening, but out the corner of your eye you saw Kurt only nodding as if in complete understanding. You would hazard a guess that parts of Bavaria evidently had very similar folklore. Between the two of them, they could likely trade stories like this the whole flight.

But Peter just continued, “But yeah, Django was my gramps, just met him a couple times. And Pietro...well that’s just me. Like I said, nothing special. I was Pietro all the way until Mom started us in kindergarten.” He smirked a little. “Guess she figured the dorky little Jewish kid with the curly brown hair needed all the help he could get fitting in with all the John’s, Mark’s, and Scott’s of the world. And yeah, feel free to tell Summers I said that later.”

So she’d Americanized his name. It wasn’t unheard of with first or second generation immigrants, but still there was something a little sad about that. Yet you smiled softly, that image of the kindergarten age Peter frankly adorable in your mind. “You were a baby brunette?”

“Until the old X-gene flared at 12 or whenever that was yeah,” But he paused, a little surprised, just then realizing what look that was on your face. “Oh stop, you’re picturing it now aren’t you? I was a total dork, don’t do that. Seriously, no! I swear I will never let you find those pictures.”

But you just kept grinning. “No need. I can imagine this forever.”

“Hell, where is Jean?” Peter looked around in a little show of dramatics. “Memory wipe needed on aisle 3, Red.”

It was just too funny though, and honestly it made all the sense in the world. The physical resemblance between Peter and Erik would have been a lot more noticeable had they both still shared similar hair color and texture. Yes, you would bet Peter’s hair had even had that bit of auburn in it too back then.

“But I do have a question,” You spoke then, your tone sincere. “What do you actually want to be called?”

“Sexy?” He answered at once.

But you didn’t let him off the hook that easily, still waiting patiently for the real answer as you just watched him.

Finally he relented, but still seeming a bit non committal. “I mean I’ve heard both for so long, I answer to either. Really, I do. But if the Django comes out though, that’s Defcon 1. It means I’ve done something catastrophically wrong and Mom is about to go full on nuclear on my ass.”

You considered this for a moment, before trying it. “Pietro,” you said, looking for any difference in his expression.

He did grin at you, eyebrows going up a little.

“Peter?” You asked then.

And to that he just continued to smile. “Babe, it’s like you’re trying to pick the name of the new dog.” He raised the pitch of his voice a little, imitating a generic wife you guessed. “Honey, which one does he like better? Did his ears go up at that one?”

“Hey, I’m just trying to figure things out,” you defended. “Guess I’ll just go back to imagining all that curly brown hair now.”

“Noooo.” He whined.

———————————

The three of you had joked and talked for quite a while. But somewhere, maybe about two thirds through the flight, things did quiet back down. Eventually you decided to try and sleep some if you could. You weren’t tired yet, but you knew you would be by the time you landed.

With the difference in timezones, even though you’d left early in the morning Greek time, it would likely only be around lunch time in the U.S. after landing. While you already would have been traveling for almost twelve hours.

It was as if you’d get to repeat the day all over again. You had all that time still ahead of you, including having to convince the Professor to let you drive Peter home.

You closed your eyes for a bit, thinking of all the hypotheticals of what you could say. What you would argue if needed, and what Xavier may say in response. But as you tried to let your thoughts drift further, you realized you’d crossed your arms, little chill bumps on them as you opened your eyes to look up at the air vent above you.

Was it stuck open? You fiddled with it a moment, but felt no difference. Shifting to sit back up a little, you looked at the seatback in front of you again as well, in the pouch there with the old magazines.

“They don’t have any blankets,” Peter said quietly, easily interpreting the reasoning for your search.

You’d thought he’d already been asleep just as Kurt was though. You were surprised as Peter reached out, smoothly laying that jacket over your chest and arms. The one he’d taken earlier.

“See.” He added. “Crime does pay sometimes.”

You gave him a skeptical look still, but the jacket really did make the difference as you leaned back again in the seat, snuggling into it. “Thank you, thief.” You answered softly.

“Any time.” He smiled a little, before reaching down to click the button on the armrest between your seats. He moved the armrest up and out of the way, then running a warm hand under the jacket to find one of your own.

You grasped his hand when they met, intertwining your fingers together.

“Have a nice nap, see you in Jersey.” He said, yet closing his own eyes as well.

“See you in Jersey, Pietro.”

You felt him squeeze your hand more at that, and you couldn’t help but smile.

————————————

(Continued in next chapter here)

#quicksilver #quicksilver x y/n #quicksilver x you #quicksilver xmen #quicksilver x oc #quicksilver x reader #peter maximoff #peter maximoff x y/n #peter maximoff x you #peter maximoff x oc #peter maximoff x reader #x men fanfiction #xmen fanfiction #xmen fic

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kiisaes · 3 years

Note

Who's your least favorite character in MHA?

...

m..mineta.........

i just think he's a waste of a character, u know? there are plenty of worse people in the series (like the LITERAL VILLAINS) but at least they have interesting backstories or personalities or ANYTHING to make them likeable. all mineta is is a perv and that is quite literally his most defining character trait so like WHY.

i recognize that "creepy perv that makes girls uncomfortable" is somehow a comedic relief archetype but it's one of the worst ones out there and i still don't know why it's utilized in media. like 1.) making girls uncomfortable was never funny anyway and 2.) if u're gonna make that a character's entire thing then what is the point of having that character in the first place? there's so many other things u could give that character. an actual personality. a better design because holy fuck mineta looks like a baby and not in the endearing cute way he literally looks like a baby. like WHAT.

mineta technically does have a personality outside of being a perv but it's so thin and so boring that i really couldn't care less about it. he's somewhat of a coward and overthinks and is obsessed with being cool when he's not actually cool at all. and those are all fine aspects to a character, if only those were the IMPORTANT aspects to a character. not the scrappy leftovers that we're supposed to be looking for UNDERNEATH the "i am a massive creep" thing. WHY IS "I AM A MASSIVE CREEP" THE MAJOR TRAIT FOR HIM. WHY. WHY!!!

i still can't fucking believe that MINETA got somewhat of a backstory before other, more notable characters in 1A like fucking KAMINARI. i think mineta's reason to be a hero is valid considering that he's a high school teenage boy and they have the emotional maturity of a dead fish but characters like sero and tsuyu get essentially nothing and mineta gets THAT? for WHAT? BEING A CREEP?

i'm getting heated anyway i just don't think mineta is a good character, i think if he were less important and his perviness was obliterated he would be a perfectly decent filler character for the class, like koda or someone. but for some fucking reason he's NOT and it CONFUSES ME TO HELL AND BACK

#asks for becki #sorry i just really don't like mineta #he is a poorly used character imo

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artificialdaydreamer · 3 years

Text

How to Say "I Love You"

Emotions are hard to understand, conveying how one feels to the person they love is even harder.

Jon had never been good at expressing his emotions. Growing up he mostly absorbed their descriptions from books, how a character was excited for something to happen, how another was jealous of someone else. The feeling he found hardest to comprehend was love. How was it possible to be so completely devoted to another person that it shifted the way you felt about everything? He loved his parents, even now that they were gone. He loved his grandmother, but he got the feeling that the type of love written about in books was different from the emotions he was actually experiencing.

When he started dating Georgie, something he’d entirely misinterpreted when it had first happened, Jon wasn’t sure what the emotions he felt were. Was the yearning to be close to her love? The happiness to have someone he could talk with about inconsequential things? Then again, if what he felt wasn’t love, then what was? Eventually Georgie came to him, told him that while she liked Jon as a friend she didn’t think their relationship was working out. They’d broken up without much fanfare and going from dating to friends didn’t really change how they interacted with each other.

As he watched Martin sleep, his coppery curls catching the light of the rising sun, his face close enough to Jon’s that it was possible to count every freckle, Jon thought he might finally have an answer. He loved Martin, that was the only explanation for why his heart clenched whenever Martin smiled, why his cheeks flushed and his palms started to sweat from the smallest things. This was what people talked about in those books, what they yearned for with such intensity, wasn’t it?

When had he started feeling like this? When had Jon’s feelings for Martin turned to love? Was it when he’d gone into the Lonely? When Martin had started working for Peter Lukas and Jon was no longer able to see him? Earlier? How long had he loved Martin and just not realized it?

Jon lay there, thinking back to their interactions over the years. Next to him Martin started to stir, blue eyes blinking open slowly. “Morning.” Martin said with a smile.

“Good morning.” Jon tried to keep his voice from shaking as his heart pounded in time with his thoughts. I love you, I love you, I love you.

From then on it was hard to not feel overwhelmed by the love, like a wave crashing over him. Jon would be in the middle of a sentence before getting distracted by Martin, how beautiful he was, his laugh. I love you, I love you, I love you. How did people deal with these emotions?

He started to use actions instead of the words he could not say. Making sure they had enough of Martin’s favorite tea in the safehouse. I love you, I love you, I love you. Offering to cook breakfast so Martin could stay in bed a bit longer. I love you, I love you, I love you. Letting his fingers linger a bit longer than was necessary whenever they touched. I love you, I love you, I love you.

They’d decided to take a walk into town, grab some groceries, and stretch their legs, passing the field full of cows Martin stopped and cooed over them. He’d gotten out his phone to take pictures and the moment was so... normal compared to everything they’d been through that Jon started chuckling.

“What’s so funny?” Martin had asked, tearing his eyes from the cows to look at Jon in confusion.

“Nothing,” Jon took a breath, trying to burn this moment into his memory. “I just love you so much.”

There was a moment of silence where Martin just stared at him, his freckled face looking even redder thanks to the glow of the setting sun. “Wait... What?”

For a heartbeat Jon wondered if he’d said the wrong thing, although he hadn’t even meant to say it at all. He couldn’t help but question if Martin’s confession of “I really loved you” meant that those feelings were gone. Had he been the only one who worried about just what the emotions flooding through his veins meant? Was he just imagining that Martin felt the same way?

“I- I’m sorry... I didn’t mean-” Jon was floundering now, scrambling for something to say to make the situation right again. “If you don’t- I’m sorry.”

“You... Do you mean that?” Martin’s cheeks were practically scarlet, his phone now dangling precariously in one hand.

“I... Yes?” Despite the fact Jon had already come to terms with his feelings, had already said the words aloud, it felt like an entirely different thing to answer when his thoughts were in such turmoil. He didn’t know how to respond in a way that wouldn’t sound selfish, asking for affection he knew in his heart he didn’t deserve. Even if Martin did still like him there wasn’t anything that Jon could do to atone for the thing’s he had said, the things he had done, the person he’d been to have treated Martin so terribly. It was ironic, that at the time he’d swatted away such affection yet now he craved it as though he were an addict suffering from withdrawal. As though he’d been living underground and now that he’d seen sunlight he couldn’t get enough.

The expression on Martin’s face was hard to understand. Was it sadness? Pity? The books Jon had read as a child had talked about brows furrowing, lips being bitten, eyes not being met, but those individual descriptions could apply to so many emotions and Jon didn’t know what it was Martin might be feeling. It was all Jon could do to not scrunch his eyes up as Martin took a tentative step closer, then another, bridging the gap between them and effectively forcing all the air from Jon’s lungs. Then he’d swept Jon up in his arms, Jon’s face nestling into the crook of his neck. It was so warm and comfortable... It felt like Jon belonged there.

“S-sorry...” Martin gasped as they broke apart, his face still red as he seemed to examine Jon for some sort of reaction. “I should have asked first, but I- Are you okay?”

In all honesty Jon was not okay. His brain was attempting to sort out just what he was feeling, synapses firing and crossing out things like anger and disgust with only his limited knowledge of emotions to go off of. Again, the words and feeling threatened to overwhelm him with the constant pounding of I love you, I love you, I love you.

“Jon?” Martin waved a hand in front of his face and it was a real effort for Jon to pull himself out of his thoughts enough to meet Martin’s gaze. “Did I do something wrong?”

“N-no... I just... I wasn’t expecting- I didn’t know if-”

“Wait... Jon, did you not think I felt the same?” Martin’s eyes were wide, reflecting the setting sun.

“I, I’m not sure.” He’d spent so much time absorbed in his own thoughts that he hadn’t actually thought of what might happen if he confessed. He hadn’t even thought about confessing. Jon realized that he’d somehow become content with just loving Martin and not telling him. He’d convinced himself that Martin was better off without him, and that there wasn’t a point in confessing.

“Jon, I’ve loved you for the past two years.” Martin’s voice was soft, his cheeks still flushed as he stared at Jon.

“What?” Jon squawked, taking a step back in surprise. Martin reached out and grabbed Jon’s hand in his own, it was so warm, so comforting.

“Well, not exactly two years...” Martin ran his free hand through his coppery curls. “Since the thing with Prentiss, when you let me stay in the Archives...”

Jon remembered those long nights they’d spent together after Martin had started living in the document storage room. At first Jon had found Martin’s presence kind of annoying, it was impossible to get some time by himself. Then he’d realized what was going on, although he couldn’t explain just how he’d known.

Martin didn’t want to be alone.

While he’d admitted during his statement that boredom had been the thing that had been the hardest to deal with, Jon suspected loneliness had also plagued him. Cut off from everyone, no internet, no phone, and it wasn’t like he could talk to Jane Prentiss. It certainly explained why Martin felt the need to check on Jon every half hour.

Once he’d realized why Martin was acting like a concerned parent he made an effort to take more breaks so they could talk. At first it had been hard to find topics for discussion, as Jon was as good with small talk as he was with emotions, but bringing up the Admiral had certainly broken the ice. After that Jon found it easier to connect with Martin, it was still somewhat awkward, but he certainly made an effort. Jon had also ended up staying in the Archives overnight a handful of times as well, partially because he had work to do and partially to keep Martin company.

It had been those nights where they’d started to connect, going out to eat so they could both eat a decent meal, talking about random things to pass the time while they struggled to fall asleep. Jon had started to get a sense of who Martin was, underneath the jumpers and tea. He was earnest and always tried his best to do whatever task Jon set for him, no matter how absurd it was. He also had a mischievous side to him and had no problem joining Tim in his pranks, although Martin was much better at keeping the pranks a secret.

It felt strange, getting to know a person through whispered conversations, over tea breaks, or at a cafe. Jon was never good with friendships, never good at telling what people wanted from him, so he’d ended up pushing everyone away. After his encounter with Mr. Spider he only became more withdrawn, survivor’s guilt eating him up inside. Martin wasn’t like the others though. Despite the fact that Jon was horrible at communicating, horrible at deciphering what emotions anyone might be feeling at any given time, Martin didn’t seem to care. He seemed to be genuinely happy to spend time with Jon, which was just as foreign a concept.

Now, despite everything that had happened in the past few years, Martin had stayed with him. An anchor in the churning waves that threatened to wash him away from everything he knew and cared about. Jon loved him for that. “I think that’s when I started to fall for you too. I didn’t- I didn’t realize at the time...”

“Oh, I definitely didn’t realize either.” Martin’s cheeks were slightly less flushed than they had been. “I think I realized it when- this is going to sound crazy...”

“You realized it when, Martin?” Jon couldn’t help but ask, smiling at the flustered look on Martin’s face.

“It... It was when I told you about lying on my CV.” Martin sighed, not daring to meet Jon’s gaze. “You, you were so mad at first but after I told you... You just started laughing and I remember looking at you and thinking ‘really? This is the man I fell in love with?’ Thankfully Tim... Tim was too distracted by everything else going on to pay attention to my hopeless crush.”

“Not so hopeless.” Jon squeezed Martin’s hand. “I knew how much I cared about you when I woke up in the hospital after my coma. Georgie was there, and I remember being sad because it was you I wanted to see.” It felt strange to say the words aloud, as though he was only understanding what had happened. He’d been thinking about it so much over the past few weeks, since he’d realized that he loved Martin, but it took saying the words aloud for him to notice. “It was funny, the months that followed, I thought it was a fitting punishment for how I’d treated you. Wanting to be close to someone and yet unable to do so. I knew I loved you a few days after we arrived here.”

“Is that why you were acting so weird?”

“Look, I... I’m not the best with emotions. I don’t get them, I don’t understand how I feel half the time. With other people it’s even harder, trying to piece together how they’re feeling based on their expression or the tone of their voice...” Since he was still holding Martin’s hand Jon couldn’t cross his arms defensively over his chest, so he settled for putting his free hand in his pocket. “This is the first time I’ve ever... I’ve ever felt something so intensely. I didn’t know what to do, how to act, now that I knew I loved you.”

“I get it, emotions are hard. Can I help?” Martin asked, his lips quirked in a small smile.

“Sure? I guess so?”

“How did you feel when I told you that I loved you?”

Jon had to think about it, he’d been so overwhelmed by the tidal wave of emotions that he wasn’t sure what any of them had been. “I was... I think I was happy.”

“You think?”

“I was happy, alright?” Jon huffed. “I was also shocked, and confused... Mostly I was happy, because I loved you so much.”

“Alright, that’s good to know.” Martin took a step closer, still smiling. “How would you feel if I kissed you?”

The answer came easier this time. “Happy. I’d feel happy.”

“May I kiss you?”

“Absolutely.” Jon didn’t know what to expect from Martin kissing him. He’d kissed Georgie and while it hadn’t been unpleasant he hadn’t gotten anything from the experience. This time however, Jon could taste the remnants of whatever chapstick Martin had used, strawberry maybe? He felt how warm Martin’s lips were, despite the cold day, their heat bleeding into him. He wrapped his arms around Martin and pulled them closer, trying to memorize everything as it happened. Martin’s scent, the wool of his jumper, how fast both their hearts were beating. In his head Jon was panicking. He didn’t know what to do, or if what he was doing was the right thing to do. He attempted to understand what the emotions he felt were: happiness... amazement... and love. So much love. Was love even an emotion? He didn’t know, but it certainly overwhelmed his senses.

When they broke apart Martin was smiling and, more surprisingly, Jon was smiling back. “Let’s take it one day at a time, alright? We can work out what you might be feeling together.”

“I- I’d like that.”

I love you, I love you, I love you.

The words still rattled around in his mind, but for once they didn’t worry him. Jon might not understand love, or emotions, or why the characters in his books had behaved a certain way, but it didn’t matter. Martin loved him back, and that was more than enough for him.

I've been sitting on this fic for a year due to some personal issues, on a related note this is not betaed, I apologize for any mistakes there might be

#tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #martin blackwood #jonmartin #jmart #tma fic #my fic

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well-its-not-human-anymore · 3 years

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Okokok here this: april, reader and casey try to prank the boys. How does it go. With who does it fails/success, what was the prank, do they get caught? Do the boys get revenge, and if so, how?

Also, splinter sees it all unfolds, does he just gets himself a snack and watch, or does he tries to subtly join in without getting caught? (We all know hes got a playful side cmon)

Bonus: they try to prank vern too, maybe the boys join in to prank him? What do they do? Does he retaliate?

Okay so I admit I let my brain go nuts on this one, so it's a little long but I was cackling the entire time I was writing it.

TMNT Headcanons

Prank Wars

Leonardo

In your complete and utter defence, Leo had 100% started this

And also in your defence, you did tell him not to

Twice

But he tricked you into watching a horror movie and ended up dying your hair green

This meant war

You'd even wrapped up April and Casey into it

Their problems were your problems

Which meant that April was the one who convinced Splinter not to say anything to his sons

He was perfectly happy to oblige

Casey was just there to help set things up

And you liked the way his mind worked

The objective wasn't to go unnoticed, there would be no point in doing it and having no proof

You were doing this to prove that you could

Leo had emphasized that he couldn't be distracted

That you were to obvious and clumsy to prank him without him noticing

Challenge fucking accepted

And that's how you ended up at the kitchen table eating lunch with April and Casey when the boys were coming back from meditating with Splinter

April kept having to shove food in her mouth to hide her laughter

Casey just decided to wear sunglasses

And you kept overpowering the urge to smirk

"Hey guys, good to see you. Y/n have you seen my katanas?"

With the obstruction of water in your mouth you just nodded at him, pointing to the other room

He sauntered off, none the wiser to your victorious grin

When he came back in only a moment later his expression had done a complete 180

Leo made direct eye contact with you and you held that stare like a wolf cornered in its den

"does someone want to explain why my katanas are encased in blueberry jello?"

You raised your hand like a child in class

"hate to break it to you, but it's actually berry blue you uncultured bitch"

Raphael

Ohhhh you were so undeniably dead

A whole other level of six feet under

It wasn't a surprise that April and Casey had backed out on this one

It also wasn't a surprise that Splinter had offered to stand up for you if things went sideways

Donnie even gave you a sheet of paper with a list of hiding spots before hand

All of this went completely unnoticed by Raph, the target of your latest scheme.

And that was fine, you had only one objective here-

Make it out alive

But it was amazing what 1 person could do with some extra cash and internet access

So that's what led you to your current position.

Cross legged on the bench, watching the large red terrapin get ready for his first set, that in itself wasn't unusual, you always watched him lift just in case you needed to run and grab someone if something went wrong

Raph was none the wiser to your plan

At least that's what you thought

Your book was in your lap and you were calmly scanning your pages, somewhat comprehending the words but keeping a very close eye on the turtle across from you

"Hey y/n?"

You peeked over the edge of your book to meet his eyes

And your heart sank to your stomach

"Yeah Raph?"

He smirked at you, taking a lumbering step forward

"You ever seen that episode of the Office where Jim fills Dwight's phone with nickels so when he takes 'em out Dwight punches himself in the face?"

Shit shit shit shit shit shit-

"Uh... No, can't say that I have, why do you ask?"

That damn smile got even wider and all of your muscles tensed, you were ready to bolt

"I'm giving you a fifteen second headstart. Starting right now."

You flew to your feet and sprinted out of the weight room

"DONNIE WE GOTTA CODE RED!"

Your lungs were ready to burst by the time you made it to your decided hiding spot. Heavy footsteps went right underneath you and you held your breath, you wouldn't dare move.

You didn't come down until hours later when Splinter came and coaxed to you out of hiding

But deep down you knew you'd started something you couldn't finish.

Vern Fenwick

You didn't even have to convince the guys to partake in this

You didn't even get the chance to tell them what you were planning

They were already brainstorming

None of you let a word of it slip to April, she would've shut you down faster than you could blink

A complete buzz kill

But fake blood was relatively cheap and all of Vern's flooring was tile (meaning extremely easy to clean and bleach)

Donnie had really been the mastermind behind the execution, none of you had any idea how he'd rigged the apartment plumbing

But he'd assured you it would only affect Vern's suite and no one else's so you didn't concern yourself with it further

And after the fact you had to wonder what exactly the former cameraman was planning on the date he'd been in the middle of

All you knew was that you got a very frantic call from the falcon himself yelling about blood coming out of his tap and the sink wouldn't shut off and it was everywhere and what the fuck was happening?

You all knew that Splinter thought it was hilarious, he'd never been particularly fond of Vern

But he did make his sons assist in the clean up and bleaching of the victims apartment floor

You went too and offered moral support

Vern had hit on you one too many times, so there was no way you'd feel bad about this

Michaelangelo

As far as pranking went, you and Mikey were partners in crime

He always had great ideas and you always came up with the best ways to execute those ideas without getting caught

But when you separated those two chaos was guaranteed

You weren't entirely sure how you had been pitted against each other but you weren't entirely mad about it

You couldn't say the same for anyone else though, the others had been on edge all week.

Pranking Mikey was a challenge, he knew how you worked and vice versa

You'd been brainstorming with April for weeks now, maybe a new perspective would help

That's what the two of you told yourselves anyways

Much to your dismay, Mikey and Casey had been plotting against you as well, the traitor.

And perhaps even more unfortunate was the fact that both of your pranks somehow overlapped and backfired on the rest of the family

Because Mikey and Casey may have replaced the family tea set with a edible sugar replica that looked identical to the original

So that when you were asked to make tea for Splinter and Leo it would dissolve the second you poured the hot tea

But they didn't tell anyone else so Leo was left with an impromptu anxiety attack when he made his own tea before sitting down to meditate and it melted into sugary leaf water

And you and April had planned the 'cutting off your finger in the kitchen' with the knife, fake finger, and fake blood

Which in theory should've worked because Mikey was in the kitchen the most, that was his territory

However once you'd started your plan you couldn't stop it

so when you 'cut your finger off' and screamed for Mikey you didn't have time to yell "wait it's a prank!" before Donnie caught a glimpse of the scene and fainted

In your defence you didn't know the purple turtle could move that fast

And to Mikey's relief he was going to throw that cutting board out anyways

Splinter explicitly banned the two of you from pranking each other after that incident

Donatello

Per your own common sense you had come to the conclusion that pranking the families resident genius was a horribly stupid idea

So for once, you'd practiced some self control and refrained from any pranks involving Donnie

Now that's not to say that the turtle vowed from aiming any pranks towards you

He had morals but messing with you walked the line separating adorable from batshit crazy

And he was all for it

April advised against it severely and even Splinter seemed to think it wasn't the best idea, but that was a lesson his son had to learn on his own

On the flip side, the second Casey heard about Donnie's plan he was all for it

So when you came over for dinner they both had to hide their excited smiles as Casey passed you your spaghetti

He knew it was your favorite

Everyone else was oblivious, which looking back on it was a very bad thing

April had her suspicions that Donnie was pulling something this evening, but she couldn't put her finger on it

That wasn't until you swirled a mouthful of noodles around your fork and shoved it into your mouth, you were starving

Here lies your predicament-

You swallowed thickly and blinked like you were in pain, your hand went to your throat and you reached for your water, ending up chugging almost the entire bottle.

Your eyes met Donnie's in a serious type of concern

"Is there hot sauce in this?"

April choked on her breadstick and quickly covered her mouth

Casey hadn't picked up on it yet

"Awh yeah- how'd you figure it out so quickly?"

You erupted in a coughing fit that sent April rushing to your side before you could tumble to the floor

"You fucking assholes! Y/N has a capsaicin allergy! Casey go start the car we need to get them to the hospital!"

On the bright side you were fine after you were rushed to the ER

But you didn't speak to Donnie or Casey for two weeks following the accident

You eventually forgave them for it and they haven't targeted you since

Sorry if it got a little dark at the end, but I felt like it was more realistic. Also that has actually happened to me but it was a nut allergy (and that's how I found out I was allergic to cashews) But I feel like the ending was a good example of how pranking someone can go horribly wrong, you should always consider the possibilities before doing something that could cause harm to a person. (Unless they really really deserve it)

I really enjoyed writing this one and I hope you guys like it as much as I do! 😁🧡👍

-Mars 🌠

#tmnt x reader #tmnt raphael #tmnt leonardo #tmnt donatello #tmnt michelangelo #tmnt vern #prankwars #tmnt headcanons #tmnt bayverse #bayverse donatello #writing requests

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standingappablog · 3 years

Text

I have theories I would like to share with y’all:

-We are left not knowing the fate of Marty and Nora, so I have some ideas of what could have happened to them.

Nora:

1.The most obvious theory, and probably the most likely is that she is in fact dead. With Rachel talking about her in the past tense and wearing her old runners it seems like she died saving her in the shark attack. Rachel also mentions that “their story” doesn’t end well. She also references at the beginning of her interview about how she treated Nora. Perhaps she felt guilty about how she treated her in their last few weeks together.

2.Now this one I know seems like a reach but, the shark attack was staged by gretchen to get Nora off the island so the experiment isnt exposed to the girls. Nora “dies” in the attack, therefore Leah has no way of blaming her. So to everyone else Nora is dead, which is why Rachel speaks of her in the past tense. (Again I’m leaning towards the her actually dying in the shark attack)

3. Or Nora could be completely fine and wasn’t interviewed because she was an informant.

Martha:

1.Now really we don’t know what happens to her. (So what I’m about to say is complete speculation) The only hint that we get is Agent Young going through her things in an attempt to find blackmail against her family. This makes us assume that she is either dead or in critical condition. Out of all of the girls towards the end of the season, the two who seem to be struggling the most are Leah and Martha. Shaken up by killing a living creature and facing the reality that she was abused as a child, makes me think Marty may have tried hurting herself. Probably towards the end of their stay on the island. Marty’s parents presumably signed her up for a relaxing time away with her best friend. So Gretchen, needing blackmail against the family so they wont sue her for whatever happened to Marty, makes me believe something like this happened to her.

2. Marty’s death could have been an accident like Noras and Janettes, how? There is many possibilities, I mean they are surviving on an deserted island so exposure, sickness falling from a high place..getting lost. Ect.

Shelby:

We are left with a lot of questions about Shelby.

Her ankle:

1. The First shot we see of her in the facility is her ankle, so when I finished watching the first time, I assumed she must have ran after Nora to help save Rachel, this one is easy to believe but her leg doesn’t look like it was bitten by a shark, there isn’t any visible wounds, so I’m doubtful of this possibility.Also her injury seems fresh enough and the girls where supposed to be on the island for three months, so I doubt she got it in the shark attack, which took place three weeks into their time on the island.

2.We know that Shelby was suspicious throughout her interview, so maybe she might have tried escaping the facility beforehand and was tackled?Or she fell? So this happening before hand could explain why the investigators mentioned they weren’t going to go easy on her in her interview. She was also described to be in a pretty fragile mental state, and they didn’t know what version of her they where going to get.

3. Shelby hurt her ankle trying to save Martha. Like I mentioned before Marty may have died or got badly injured by hurting herself. Maybe Shelby was there and tried saving her, somewhat similar to the situation with her friend Becca.

4.Another theory I saw was that Toni may have accidentally hurt her like she did Reagan. There has been a lot of speculation if Toni and Shelby are on good terms or not. Maybe Marty’s death/ injuries become a conflict between them since she was present. Or a conflict about something entirely different could have cuased her ankle injury

5.Or simply she could have just fallen before her rescue from the island lol. Though her ankle is the first shot we get of her in the facility. That’s what makes me think it’s significant.

Her hair:

1. The two possibilities that I could think of is that, her hair was just so matted and unkept by the end of the three months that there was just no salvaging it so it was shaved, or:

2.Shelbys hair seemed to be her form of releasing her frustration. We know that her mental health declines after the shark attack, so she may in upset/frustration cut it all off or continues to take chunks out of her hair as a form of release.

Leah and Shelby (+possibly Dot and Agent Young)

Leah:

1.After the shark attack, if Nora does die I think Leah will have a difficult time convincing the others, especially Rachel that Nora is some sort of agent.

2. The groups friend just died, so hearing from Leah that Nora was in on whatever is happening to them won’t be taken well. Certainly not by Rachel, I can imagine Leah saying this about Nora would make her furious. They will probably assume that she is once again having a mental break, and won’t listen to her.

3.Even if Nora doesn’t die, she was told to do as much as she can to keep everyone in the dark, so I wouldn’t put it past her making Leah look like she is going crazy.

Shelby:

1.At first I don’t think Shelby will believe Leah, but she will probably slowly begin to suspect things like Leah did. The two have an understanding, as we where shown, Shelby knows what it feels like to breakdown, and have everyone think they are crazy. But she knows in that moment she isn’t crazy, and neither is Leah. So when she is rescued and quarantined in the facility it will probably convince her completely.

Anaphylactic shock:

1.Shelby going into anaphylactic shock. How did she even go into anaphylactic shock? Where they given food in their rooms and Gretchen would have to have known that she is allergic. Right?

2.I think Shelby left a time on the note to Leah for her to escape. She maybe was able to order shellfish to her room, and then would eat it during the time Leah was going to escape.

Or:

1. I think MAYBE Shelby and Dot figured out what was going on before being rescued. We see that Dot orders a plate of seafood, which she barely touches. What if somehow Dot got the seafood to Shelby, maybe by leaving it underneath the table and shelby taking it back to her room after her interview. So when Leah tries to escape she eats the seafood, which sets off the alarm and distracts the guards. And with Shelby leaving a time on the note for Leah to escape, she would know when to eat the Seafood. (Another reach I know)

And:

-Agent Young could also have helped them. We saw that he sympathised with the girls and that he was the one keeping tabs on all of them. Maybe he knowingly let the girls do this without telling anyone, making it easier for them to pass notes and for Leah to escape.

They all know:

-Another possibility is that Leah somehow convinces the others that something is going on. And plan out how to figure out what really is going on. All of the girls get their stories straight, and they purposely leave out parts that could be used against them. Playing the investigators. I’m less inclined to believe this one since Shelby gave the note to Leah telling her she was right all along, why would she do that if they all knew anyways?

Toni and Shelby:

I think a lot of us suspect that the twos releationship is a little rocky by the time they get to the facility. (I have another post explaining why I think they aren’t on good terms currently)

1.Like I mentioned before Toni and Shelbys conflict may involve Marty, with her dying or hurting herself, Toni who we have seen can have huge outbursts when she is upset, could blame Shelby for not doing enough ,because maybe she was present when it happened. So maybe Toni irrationally blames Shelby for whatever happened to Marty.

2.This irrational anger could also be the cause of Shelbys ankle injury. Of course I don’t think Toni would ever purposely hurt Shelby, but she could accidentally, just as she did with her previous girlfriend.

3.A theory I’ve seen suggested a few times is that, they staged their break up to protect each other. If they seem like they aren’t together anymore to the investigators, they can’t be used against one another. (I personally think this one is hella cute)

4. Another possible conflict is Tonis anger issues affecting their relationship just as it did with Reagan, Tonis outbursts may be too much for Shelby and that may become an issue.

5. Shelby not being able to come to terms with her sexuality. This one isn’t as likely, because as far as everyone is concerned they are stuck on the island for god knows how long. The idea of not going home any time soon only seems to make Shelby want to explore herself more. And everyone I feel like would be completely supportive.

Although:

-Martha may have an issue, not with the fact that they are together but more that when they found food instead of taking it back to everyone, they hooked up. Leaving Martha to kill the goat by herself, when she really didn’t need to. Maybe this could lead to Toni having to choose who’s side to take, her girlfriend or best friend. (Martha has “you and us” mentality with Shelby after her homophobic remarks. Toni also has told Martha “since when where there sides?”)

Annnnnnddd that is all, I’ve been thinking about this for a while and I felt like typing it all out, I’d love to know what everyone thinks and your theories!

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onechicago-upsteadrhekker · 3 years

Text

breathe again (the air i would kill to breathe)--upstead one-shot

So, I wrote some more angst. You can blame @imjustwritingg and @anniesardors because we are now in an angst competition and this is my submission. I think I might win.

As strange as it might be, I actually had a lot of fun writing this. I also cried and have been deeply in my feels for the better part of the past few months as I wrote on this. I do have happier things in the works, but I don’t think I could ever not write angst so there is your warning I suppose.

Anyways, I hope you enjoy and I can’t wait to hear what you think!

Title is taken from Sara Bareilles’s Breathe Again. I like the Sleeping At Last cover!

Read on AO3

They are sitting in one of their new favorite places to decompress after a long day of working or just when they needed to have a good chat, partner to partner, friend to friend.

The bar was cozy, and it already held some of Jay’s favorite memories from past visits with Hailey—his birthday celebration with just the two of them, Hailey’s four-year anniversary of joining Intelligence, a place they went when they did not want to be interrupted by their other friends.

A place that was special to just them.

Jay could not help but think that she looked particularly beautiful tonight sitting across from him in the low-lit bar, the Christmas lights shining through the window highlighting her features.

She was not dressed fancy, in her usual winter outfit of a button-down and skinny jeans with her sturdy snow boots, but the way her eyes sparkled merrily as she laughed, her smile lighting up the room in a way he has not seen from her in far too long makes him marvel at how effortless her beauty truly was.

She is laughing at him with that big smile of hers as he jokingly brings up the reason why they came here tonight trying to mask the nerves he was feeling.

He listens to her tell him about her job offer with a sinking stomach, desperately trying to act calm and collected instead of revealing the panic that was currently raging inside of his chest.

He pays the check, his heart beating wildly with relief because she just told him she was staying.

He is looking at her now and they are talking about losing and gaining and he cannot figure out if they are talking about them or something else entirely. His gut says them, and he is waiting with bated breath for Hailey to say whatever he knows she wants to say but then she does not, and he is watching her walk out of the bar.

An hour ago, this was his favorite bar because of the memories with Hailey it held.

Now, he is pretty sure he will only remember this place as the one where he let the girl get away.

He notices the way she quickly glances at him before she accepts the small piece of paper that was being handed to her.

They had run by the courthouse to hurry along a warrant and now he is waiting on Hailey to catch up with him because she had been stopped by the judge.

He was new and around their age.

He was also nice, charming and good-looking and he was starting to rub Jay the wrong way.

Over the past several months when Intelligence needed a warrant it was somehow always signed by this guy. When he and Hailey needed to come to the courthouse for whatever reason, they always happened to bump into him.

Jay frowned when Hailey chuckled in response of whatever was called after her as she started to make her way back across the lobby towards him.

He gives her a look when she falls into step next to him and she glances at him, staying quiet until they are back in the truck on their way to the district.

Jay cannot stand it anymore. He adjusts his grip on the steering wheel, “So, what was that all about?”

Hailey glances at him again and it reminds him of the way she looked at him before she told him about her FBI offer not even a month ago.

“Uh, he gave me his number,” She was looking everywhere but him and Jay did his best to control his emotions.

It fell quiet again and Jay did not like the awkwardness that seemed to descend upon them.

It had never been awkward with her before, and he does not like the idea of it happening now.

He clears his throat, keeping his eyes on the road, “Did he ask you out?”

She gives a curt nod, still fidgeting entirely too much with the radio in her hands, “Yes.”

“What did you say?” He dreads the answer.

“I said yes,” It was barely a whisper and when he looks over at her, she is already looking at him, her eyes telling him she was tired of waiting on him to make a move.

He quickly looks away again, closing his eyes hard for a brief moment before whipping into the roll-up and swinging into his parking spot.

“He has me to answer to if he doesn’t treat you the way you deserve.”

Jay is out of the truck without a second glance, slamming his door shut and rapidly wiping away the tears that were gathering in his eyes.

Hailey starts to date the judge and by all rights, the guy is perfect.

He has a well-paying job, he is good looking and he has a great personality.

Jay tries to find faults in him, but he cannot. He wanted to hate him, but when Jay first met him, he had received a hearty handshake and a heartfelt thank you for watching Hailey’s back.

As much as he wanted to, he could not hate him. Apparently when Hailey had told her new boyfriend how close she was with her male partner, he was more than understanding of their relationship and would not be put out from the time they spent time together.

How could he hate someone who respected the time Hailey spent with him, another guy who already spent her whole workday with.

So, Jay decides to hate the way her name clashes with his. Mike and Hailey. Hailey and Mike. They do not go together at all.

Not like his name fit with hers. Jay and Hailey—Detectives Halstead and Upton. Hailey and Jay—Detectives, partners, best friends; nothing more.

But then maybe he hates the way they fit even more because all it does is remind him of something they should have had but for some reason never did.

He thinks that they were meant to be together, but then he thinks that if it has not happened by now then maybe it was never meant to be.

“Hailey, are you sure you’re okay?”

Jay is standing, facing her with his arms crossed and a worried brow.

She sighs, “Yes, Jay, for the thousandth time, I am fine. It’s barely even a scratch.”

He lets out a disbelieving scoff and approaches the bed where she is sitting with her legs folded underneath her. She tries not to gasp when he gently touches the side of her face, turning it slightly to inspect the long gash running across her forehead and to the top of her ear.

“You’re not fine, Hailey. You could have died,” His voice cracks and he sounds like a desperate man, pleading and scared.

It is his tears that makes hers start to well up and she tentatively wraps her fingers around the wrist of the hand that was now borderline caressing her cheek.

She looks earnestly, desperately into his glossy green eyes, “But I didn’t because you saved me.”

He is standing very close to her, and she can feel his breath ghosting over her face as he looks down at her, his large hand holding the side of her face as they stare into each other’s eyes. She swears he glances down at her lips.

Her heart is beating erratically inside her chest, waiting for him to close the distance between them but then the curtain is thrown back and Jay moves faster than she thinks she has ever seen.

It is Mike and Hailey instantly feels bad at the way she is disappointed to see him. At the way she wishes he had not come, but he is her boyfriend, and he has every right to be there with her because she knows he loves her.

Mike’s hand is now where Jay’s was just seconds ago, and it does not feel nearly as comforting and good and right as Jay’s did, but she is not supposed to have those feelings anymore, so she tries to ignore them and leans into Mike.

“Oh my God, Hailey,” He breaths out in concern, “Are you all right? The nurse called me and told me you got hurt on the job.”

She tries to give him a convincing smile.

She is not all right but she cannot tell him that because it has nothing to do with gash on her head.

Hailey reaches out and touches his chest, “I’m fine. Jay was watching my back.”

Mike seems to realize that they are not alone and turns to face Jay, reaching out a sincere hand, “Thank you for protecting her.”

Jay shakes his head and takes Mike’s hand, trying to swallow the lump in his throat, “You don’t have to thank me. It’s my job.”

He glances at Hailey so quick that only she notices it and she gets what he is saying. He never wants the thanks because it is just a given for him. He will always protect her or die trying and nothing will ever change that.

He flashes a smile at Mike who is none the wiser of what he just told Hailey with his eyes and excuses himself, quickly slipping out of the sliding glass door as he lets the tears fall.

It is dark in the corner of Molly’s he had retreated to away from all the commotion that was happening around the bar.

He watches Hailey beam at her girlfriends who were trying to get a closer look at her displayed left hand, and he slinks back farther in his chair, picking at the label of his untouched beer.

He always had a hard time drinking without Hailey and she was busy right now.

Adam, Kevin and Voight are patting Mike on the back in a congratulatory manner and while Jay knows it is irrational, he feels somewhat betrayed by his closest friends.

He wishes that they were clapping him on the back in congratulations instead and that he was in the center of attention along with Hailey, but he forces himself to recognize that it is his fault that things are unfolding this way.

He’d had chances but he never thought Hailey would actually settle down with this man he despised for the sole reason that he was not him.

Jay fully recognized he was a fool for thinking he did not have to work for her. He knew he was a fool for thinking she would eventually break-up with Mike, and he would be waiting for her and then they would live happily ever after like some damn fairy tale romance.

He knew better than that.

Picking at the fraying label again, Jay sees Hailey flash around the diamond on her finger and he cannot help but think of the ring that he bought on a whim after seeing it in a local storefront.

He had randomly seen it one day and thought that if he were ever to propose to someone, he wanted it to be with that ring.

He had seen it and he had immediately thought of Hailey.

He does not know why he bought it, but he did, and he now knows that it will never be given to the person it was intended for.

The ring flashes and Jay thinks his ring would look better on her finger.

Hailey beams and Jay thinks her smile is not as bright as it used to be.

He takes a sip of his now lukewarm beer and Jay thinks he should probably get used to drinking without Hailey.

“Come in.”

He opens the door and cannot help but gasp.

She looks beautiful.

Her hair pinned out of her face, blonde curls cascading down her back, a veil clipped in place with a sparkling barrette. Her dress is elegant but simple and it fit Hailey perfectly.

She is standing in front of a tall full-length mirror, admiring her reflection when she turns to softly smile at him, “What’re you doing in here?”

He notices Kim crossing her arms and narrowing her eyes as she stands off to the side getting herself ready, “No boys allowed.”

He has to tear his gaze away from Hailey to glance at her, “Yeah, well, I had to come see my best friend before she became a married woman.”

Kim’s eyes soften and Hailey looks over at her, gently nodding towards the door, “Could you give us a few minutes?”

“Of course,” She gives them both a look like she knows they are about to close a chapter that they never got right before she disappears out the door.

Jay clears his throat, “You look absolutely stunning, Hailey.”

Her cheeks flush and she gives him a once over, picking up the skirt of her dress to approach him, stopping only a few inches in front of him. Reaching out, she quickly straightens his bowtie and takes a step back, cocking her head with an affectionate smile, “And you look very handsome.”

She meets his eyes, blue on green and he cannot help but just stare because after this, she is Mike’s forever and always and it would not be right to stare at her like he wants her.

Somehow, he does not think that her being married will stop him from wanting her, but he will try.

He is drinking her in like this is the last time he is seeing her and in a way it is. This is the last time where he can look at her with the hope of someday being more.

There are so many things left unsaid and he can see his own anguish reflecting back at him; hopes and promises and dreams swimming in her eyes, fading away with each passing second. A future that could have been theirs and will now only stay alive in quiet imaginings and forbidden dreams.

He could tell her. Right here and right now. That he loved her. That they could work. That he never wants to be without her, but it was her wedding day, and he could not do that to her.

He was too late, and it would not be fair for him to beg for her now when she had already given him every opportunity.

So, he accepted the gentle kiss she bestowed on his cheek, and he looked back into her watery eyes, heartbroken and sad.

They stared into each other’s eyes and a thousand memories of laughing and crying and comfortable silences and shared looks flooded in like a painful smile because he was the guest, and she was the bride.

The first time they rolled up to a crime scene after she and Mike tied the knot was one that would stay with him but not because the case they’d caught was gruesome or personal.

It was because of her.

She looked the same. She talked the same. She had that same bright smile and brilliant sparkle in her eye, but it was different now.

She was a married woman and the person that came back from her honeymoon was a slightly different person than he knew—a person he would never get to know because only her husband was privy to the person she was behind closed doors.

And he was not her husband and that crushed him almost to the point of not being able to function.

Jay never knew he could grieve so much for a person who was still by his side every day.

He tries to ignore the simple wedding band she wore now and thinks if he could just pretend she wasn’t married then their days would be no different. He could still have that intimate partnership with her and maybe he could imagine for a little while that they were just perpetually on the precipice of something more even though he knew nothing could ever happen now.

But then they were there, at the first crime scene where he was Jay, the single partner and she was Hailey, the married one.

Nodding at the patrol officer, he introduced himself, “Detective Halstead,” he then gestured to Hailey, “This is Detective Upton.”

She glanced at him, and he shook his head. Right, not Detective Upton.

“I mean Detective Martin.”

He curses himself and tries not to look too sick at the now constant reminder she was not and never will be his as he watched his newly married partner, Hailey Anne Martin walk off with the patrol officer.

He could not help but think his own last name sounded much better with hers than Mike’s did.

Jay forces himself to follow them with the sounds of Hailey Anne Halstead echoing in the back of his mind—taunting him, reminding him of the future he had just lost for good.

Almost a year later, when Hailey disappeared into Voight’s office looking a little unsure and maybe even a little sad, he was scared he was about to lose the only thing keeping them together now.

But when she announced her pregnancy a few weeks later, the subtle shifts in her behavior suddenly made sense, his heart dropping to his feet. He put on a smile for her, but it was hard when her smile held that same sadness and regret it had on her wedding day.

If the dreams haunting him for weeks after that were of little feet and giggling faces that had her features mixed in with his, well.

He would never admit it.

“Hi.”

She looks up, a dulled sparkle in her eye, “Hey.”

He nods to the bundle in her arms, afraid to get too close and see the baby that looks nothing like him and a lot like Mike, “What’s his name?”

She smiles, happy but there is still something in her expression that is achingly sad, “Meet Jay Robert Martin.”

He blinks. An odd lump forming in his throat, “Really?”

She chuckles a little at that and nods her head, “Yes, really.”

He blinks again, “Why?”

She shrugs, “Because you’ve saved my life more times than I can count and I—"

She hesitates. She was going to say it, he could see it in her eyes, but she settles for the phrase, “And because I care a lot about you” instead.

She named the baby after him. He is honored, but inside he is devastated because that could have been his son in her arms bearing his name.

Instead of being called daddy, he would be called Uncle much like the rest of the unit and if that did not break his heart more than it was already broken.

He is happy for her, truly, but he knows that some part of him is always going to see the life where he is Hailey’s husband and the father of her children.

And sometimes he cannot help but think Hailey sees that too.

She’s there.

Standing in the back, smiling at him and he wishes that she were standing next to him, but that was not her place, and it had not really ever been hers regardless of how much he wished it.

He shakes Voight’s hand and then turns to shake the Superintendent’s outstretched grip, graciously accepting the round of applause from the audience, blushing at his teammates hoots and hollers.

He walks off the stage and is vaguely aware of the congratulations and hearty slaps he was receiving. He responds with the proper amount of enthusiasm, but his eyes are always looking at her.

Excusing himself, he leaves the group, missing the way they all exchange a melancholy look of understanding. One they have exchanged many times before.

He approaches her and he notices the way her smile does not fully reach her eyes and he is always wondering if she also imagines a universe in which they are all there together and happy and one big family.

“Sergeant Jay Halstead,” She hums out, her smile growing into a warm smirk, “I have to admit, it has a nice ring to it.”

She is loving and affectionate and she is looking at him with all the feelings she is not supposed to have, and he can feel his throat closing up.

He forces out a quick grin, “Thanks.”

She is still looking at him, her eyes holding everything she cannot say aloud, and Jay tries to come up with something to say because he cannot take her looking at him like this. Not today. Not right now.

Not ever, really.

“I uh, I thought you weren’t going to make it,” He furrows his brows, “Didn’t Robby have a game tonight?”

Hailey shakes her head, her smile turning a little sadder, “I wasn’t about to miss my partner getting a promotion.”

She looks away for a brief second before looking back at him and Jay thinks he can see the glisten of tears in her eyes, “Although I guess you’re my Sergeant now, not my partner anymore.”

Tears sting his own eyes and his heart squeezes tight in his chest.

She is right.

They are not partners anymore. He just got a promotion; Intelligence is his and now he is her sergeant.

He should be excited but he’s not. He’s mourning the loss of the only thing that’s keeping them together now and it hurts so bad because he is losing her.

He is always losing her with each day that passes.

“She’s beautiful, Mike.”

The other man grins, “Yeah, we like her all right.”

Jay smiles but his heart is not in it.

Like always, he is touched that Hailey includes him in her big life events and like always, he is truly happy for her, but it also serves as a painful reminder of the life he wanted to have with her.

He is grateful to be in Hailey’s life at all and he would not give up the relationship they have now for anything, but he also thinks that it is some kind of cruel punishment that he is constantly forced to watch her love and grow a family with a man that is not him.

“And did you see those dimples?” Mike has a dreamy look on his face and his eyes shone proudly, “Perfect just like her mother’s.”

Yes, Jay thinks, perfect just like Hailey.

He clears his throat, tired of the way he always seems to tear up while he is with Hailey and her family because everything reminds him of the deep regrets he has been carrying around for years now.

“I like the name Annie,” He says trying to keep the conversation flowing so they do not lapse into an uncomfortable silence like they are prone to do.

He has never been close to Hailey’s husband and Jay knows this is because he is in love with the man’s wife. On some level, Jay thinks that Mike is aware of this and that is why neither of them have ever tried.

In any case, Jay does not think he could ever really be friends with anyone who is married to the girl he loves.

Mike shifts his weight to lean against the banister making the old porch creak slightly, “It was my great-grandmother’s name. We also liked it because it is similar to Hailey’s middle name.”

Jay nods absentmindedly and thinks about how lucky that little girl is to have Hailey as a mom. He always thought she would make a great mother regardless of who fathered the children, and he was right.

If he were to ever have children, he would only want Hailey as their mother and that is how he knows he will never have children.

“It means a lot to Hailey that you are here tonight,” Mike breaks the silence and Jay glances at him from his place sitting on their porch steps.

“I wouldn’t miss it,” He manages a sincere smile because he is telling the truth.

He would not miss welcoming Hailey’s daughter into the world even if it did hurt.

“She loves you, you know.”

Jay feels his heart stop in his chest and his mouth dry up, “What?” It came out garbled and he is looking at Mike like he just grew antlers.

Mike’s eyes meet his and Jay is shocked to see the depth of knowledge in the other man’s gaze.

He cannot help think that perhaps he was not as subtle as he thought he was regarding his feelings for Hailey.

“And I know you love her so I can’t imagine how hard this must be for you.”

He cannot come up with a proper response.

Or any type of response really because he is still gaping speechless at Mike who is now staring off into the night sky.

“We’re just partners,” The statement falls off his lips in a conditioned response.

It is the words he always used to describe his and Hailey’s relationship back when friends and family gave him knowing looks and teasing smiles. He has not had anyone question his feelings for Hailey in a long time and he feels slightly panicked that it is happening now and by her husband no less.

Mike shakes his head, scoffing lightly as he looks back into the night sky, “I don’t think you two were ever just partners. I’ve known that from the very beginning, but I liked Hailey and I wanted to be with her as long as she would stay with me.”

Jay blinks and he does not know what to say or how to react. He does not know where this is going, and he does not like not knowing.

“I know a part of her will always love you, but I love her enough to be with her on any terms even if that means not having her whole heart,” Mike sighs, pausing for a brief second, “I won’t lie and say that it doesn’t hurt at times, but I know how lucky I am that I even got her at all.”

Jay just stares at him, finally managing to get out a “Why?”

Why is he telling him this? Why now?

Mike seems to understand what he is asking, and he turns to face him, “She doesn’t say anything about it obviously, but I know it’s getting harder and harder for her to see you; to work with you every day.”

Jay definitely does not like where this is going.

Mike looks directly in his eyes and there is a hard edge there that he has never seen from the man before, “I know she has more than enough experience to make Sergeant, but she doesn’t want to take the test because she thinks you need her. You are holding her back, Jay, and I think it is time that you let her make a life for herself outside of Intelligence.”

All he can do is stare at the man. He wants to rail and shout and tell him that he cannot dictate what Hailey does with her life or tell him what to do but some part of him deep down knows that Mike is right.

Maybe it is time to let her go but it is so hard because he is not ready to give her up.

And it hurts too. God, it hurts so bad, and he thinks that it will always hurt because he knows what he and Hailey had was real and true, but their timing was just always off.

His heart is breaking because even though he is not with Hailey in the way he wants, she is still the best thing in his life and the thought of giving that up makes him physically sick.

He is aware of Mike moving towards the front door. He pauses and looks over his shoulder.

“Goodnight, Jay.”

He is left on the porch, and he can hear little giggles from inside the house. Hailey is laughing and there is a squeal of ‘daddy’, and he imagines Mike is swinging Robby up into the air.

It is too painful, and he thinks it will only get more painful as time goes by.

There are bright flashes and enthusiastic applause as he waits to shake her hand after the superintendent.

She turns to him. He is smiling at her but there are tears in his eyes. She is carrying herself proudly but there is anguish written all over her face.

They are both torn. He wants her to succeed in everything, but he does not want to lose her. She wants to advance her career, but she does not want to leave him.

They stood there, looking at each other, saying nothing. But it was the kind of nothing that meant everything.

The world spins obliviously around them as they become strangers who share long lost memories and quick smiles every once in a while.

It is a peaceful night out, the air humid and warm and it feels like the perfect summer night. The sun has almost disappeared over the horizon, a soft glow painting the trees and the houses along the street.

He is sitting alone on the porch steps listening to the chaos that is happening through the screen door and when he hears it swing open, he does not need to turn to see who it is because he already knows.

She sits down beside him, leaving a few feet of space in between them and does not say anything, just stares into the dusky night.

“I can’t believe Annie’s already thirteen.”

Jay glances at her before clasping his hands over his knees, nodding thoughtfully, “It seems like just yesterday she was born.”

Hailey scoffs, “Tell me about it. I don’t feel old enough to have two teenagers.”

He looks back over at her. She is still staring off into nothing in particular and Jay cannot help but notice once again just how beautiful she is. Her hair is still golden blonde, and her complexion looks as young as ever, the laugh lines around her eyes only making her seem more youthful.

“You certainly don’t look it,” It just slips out and he cannot help the way his stomach flutters when he sees her cheeks flush like they used to when he flirted with her in the truck over fifteen years ago before Hailey was a wife and a mother and nothing more than his friend and partner.

They fall silent again, each watching the night become dark as they listen to the happy teenage squeals that are coming from within the house.

“Do you regret it?” She says suddenly and he glances at her, her gaze still far away.

He sucks in a breath, “What?’

She shrugs, “I don’t know,” She shakes her head, “Everything?”

He is quiet for a long moment, and he does not have to ask to know what she means.

Hailey is about to tell him to just forget it, that it was a silly question but then he opens his mouth, and she shuts hers, the tears already starting to prick her eyes as the feelings that have never dulled over the years come to the surface.

“Just because things didn’t happen between us the way that we maybe wanted doesn’t mean that you aren’t the best thing that has ever happened to me. Because you were.”

It is the closest they have ever gotten to talking about this thing that has been between them from almost the very beginning and Hailey suddenly feels transported to a day in the past when she thought one of their moments was about to turn into something more and change her life forever.

But then she remembers she is married and has two children, and she cannot have a life with Jay.

She blinks, “Yeah,” She looks at him with glistening eyes, “You were for me too.”

The church is packed with people in uniform and Jay is once again awed at Hank Voight’s reach within the city. The damn mayor was even there.

He is serving as a pallbearer along with Kevin, Kim, Adam and of course, Hailey. It is fitting that they are the ones chosen to do this because they were the ones chosen by the man himself to be in his unit and they are the ones who lasted the longest.

Jay would wager a bet that they were all more like family to Voight than he would have ever admitted, and he thinks that they all know that deep in their hearts so that is why they are doing this—to give their sergeant one last send off.

To say thank you for bringing them together and creating this family that they never would have had if it had not been for him.

“Jay,” Kevin taps his upper arm to get his attention, nodding towards the double doors in the back of the church and that is when he sees her.

She is dressed nearly identical to him, give or take a few medals and even though he would not call the CPD uniform blues highly fashionable, Hailey wears it like she has just stepped off a magazine cover.

Her eyes find his and she gives him a sad little smile like she knows that this is yet another chapter of their past closing. With each ending, the memories and the laughter and the comfortable silences are drifting away and truly becoming a thing of the past.

In a way, it almost feels like a whole lifetime ago.

She is in front of him now and they say nothing because their eyes say all they need to know. Sighing, he glances down at the floor with a heaviness he has not felt in a long time before he looks up and draws her into a hug.

He does not remember the last time he hugged her. He thinks maybe it was after she had Annie, but he tries to refrain from any physical contact with her because he is always left with wanting more.

Today, he knows they both need it, so he gives in and squeezes her tight.

The Intelligence unit they know is slowly starting to die and it hurts more than words could say.

It might sound dramatic, but it almost feels like the end of an era.

Cork and Kerry had not changed much over the years.

It was somewhat of a comfort to see some things stayed the same, but mostly, it felt like his heart was in a vice because when he looked around, he was brought right back to the moment when Hailey was telling him about her FBI offer and he was watching her walk out the door and away from a life that should have been there’s.

He sees her sitting there, her jacket thrown over the back of her seat like it had been all those years ago and even though she is clearly much older, all he can see is her bright smile and sparkling blue eyes.

“Jay,” She says it softly and he cannot help but return the gentle smile she is giving him, “You made it.”

He sits down, “Like I would ever miss this. Besides, what else is there to do?”

She smirks, “Jay Halstead getting a little bored in his retirement and old age?”

Rolling his eyes, he gives her a knowing look, “You know I never could handle not being on the job without getting restless.”

“Jay,” She lets out a little laugh, “It’s been twelve years.”

“Exactly,” He stresses, and she just shakes her head.

“You seriously need a hobby or something other than sitting around with an itchy trigger finger,” She is teasing him but there is also a hint of concern in her voice, and he knows she worries that he is lonely.

He is lonely but it is his own fault because the only person he would want to spend any time with is her and even though they both grew old, they did not do it together, so he has no wife, and he has no children.

He offers a smile and tries not to look as sad as he feels, “I did clean out my attic recently,” He reaches inside his pocket and pulls out a well-worn photograph, “And actually, I found this. I thought you might want to see it.”

He slides it across the table, and she reaches for it. He watches as she studies the picture, a melancholy look coming over her face as she gently touches the picture, whispering almost to herself, “We were so young.”

It is a picture of the whole team after what he is pretty sure was a successful raid but what draws him to the picture is the way that Hailey is leaning on him. She has her head on his chest and the grins on their faces tell him that someone probably cracked a joke as the photo was being taken.

They look happy and if you look closely, one would almost believe that he and Hailey were an item at the time but he knows that they were not.

They were almost a lot of things, and he thinks almost is one of the saddest words in the English language.

He almost kissed her. She almost told him how she felt. They were almost together.

Almost but not quite.

He looks at the picture and he wants to pretend that they are still living in that moment because even if it was only for a heartbeat, everything was perfect.

Hailey lets out a little huff, a hint of wonder in her voice, “Look at us. So full of life.”

Jay lets out a little hum of acknowledgement and Hailey looks up at him, her eyes earnest and shining with memories of a life long ago.

“Those truly were the best years, weren’t they?” She says it so reverently and it makes a lump form in his throat because while they saw hard things and went through tough times, he would go back to that point in time in an instant.

Now when he knows how important people are and how precious time is. And even if you scream and argue and fight, family is everything and you should never take anything for granted.

Now when he knows love is worth fighting for even if you are scared.

God, if he could go back, he would fight for Hailey till his very last breath and never give up no matter the outcome.

“Yeah,” He clears his throat, “Yeah, they were.”

A corner of Hailey’s screws up in some kind of half-smile and he thinks she is trying not to cry.

She shakes her head, still lost in the picture, “I’ve done a lot in my life, but this—Intelligence,” She trails off, lost in thought and gives the picture one last swipe of her thumb before passing it back to Jay.

“We were a good team,” She smiles at him, and he can see all the memories playing in her eyes.

He nods, sliding the picture back into his wallet, “Me, you, Kev, Adam, Kim, Voight—We were the best,” He gives her a gentle smile, “You made us the best.”

Hailey cocks her head, a perplexed look on her face, “What do you mean?”

“Don’t get me wrong, Intelligence was always a good unit but,” He shakes his head, “I don’t think we really became a team until after you walked in that bank. You made all of us better which made the unit better.”

He pauses before softly admitting, “You made me better.”

There are tears in her eyes, but she does not say anything. He takes a deep breath, glancing away for a second before looking back at her.

“You ever think about timing?” He does not give her a chance to answer and powers through before he loses the nerve to be honest with his feelings for her, “Time, fate, whatever dictates how and when things fall into place. It’s all so very delicate and fragile—when you think that just one slight change or difference could have set your life on a completely different path.”

Jay fidgets with the beer label and looks up at her through his eyelashes, “Today, forty-seven years ago you walked into a bank, and you saved my life. Now we are sitting here having beers and you are my best friend. Have been for forty-seven years.”

He turns to look out of the window, deep in thought, “Do you ever wonder what would have happened if we met later or earlier or not at all?”

Do you ever wonder that we met before we were supposed too? Or maybe we didn’t meet early enough?

Were we ever supposed to meet?

Those are the questions he is really asking, but then he dismisses the last question that crossed his mind because he knows that they were always supposed to meet.

He is better because of her.

He is not married, and he does not have children, but his life was full nonetheless because of her, and he would not trade that for anything.

“Timing really is everything, isn’t it?” She speaks softly, and he knows what they are each really saying just like all those years ago in this same bar when they were talking in vague metaphors about gaining and losing.

They had the chemistry. They had the love. They had the whole damn universe, but the timing was always off.

They were a perfect fit, he and Hailey, there was just too much going on for them to see it until it was too late and then they were too afraid to do anything about it.

Hailey looks at him and he looks at her and it seems like they are looking at each other for the first time in years. And just like back then, there is so much love in their glance. And yet somehow the timing is still not right—she is still married, and he is not the kind of man to break up a marriage no matter how much he loves her.

And it seems that this is how it will always be for the two of them—like thunder and lightning—their timing would always be a little bit off.

He is sitting in the back alone. No one has noticed him which is fine because he does not want to talk.

He pulled out his old uniform for this and he feels strange wearing it after all this time, but it was the very least she deserved.

It does not seem real. She was always so strong, her voice always a phone call away and he did not want it to be real.

He watches as her family sniffles at the front of the church, each taking turns looking into the casket to say goodbye and he cannot bring himself to go up there. He does not want to see her laying there lifeless because in his mind, in his memory, Hailey was anything but and he does not want to mar those images.

Besides, Hailey’s family is up there and while he knows they love her, he cannot help but think of the family that should be up there.

The family that was forged through tough cases, long nights, emotionally charged moments, blood, sweat and tears.

Because that’s the family that really knew her. They knew what ticked her off, what rubbed her the wrong way and how to make her smile when she was tried and worn-thin.

He’d known.

They had seen her at her weakest, at her most fierce, and the way she fought like a bat out of hell when she needed to.

He’d seen.

But his place is not up there with her children and grandchildren and her husband. It is here in the back where he can remember the person she was to him, to her unit, to her community because he is the only person left that will ever really know.

He sits and he grieves for her, and he grieves for the life that he wanted. The life that they could have had had the universe not gotten in the way one too many times and had they not been so scared to take that leap.

He wants to go tell every young boy that loved a girl, yell it till he was blue in the face that it was never too complicated or too hard or the ‘wrong timing’. Not if the love was real. It was worth the fight, always.

Quietly, he slips from the shadows and slowly makes his way out to his truck. He is old, but all those years of keeping in shape paid off because he is pretty spry for an 85-year-old man. He could not run like he used to, but he is still sharp enough to recite every ordinance in the book and his vision is still 20-20 so he is able to live alone, and he can still drive himself to wherever he wants.

He hoists himself up in the truck he had bought after he retired. It is the same make and model of his favorite truck he had had during his partnership with Hailey, only a newer year, but it still smelt the same and looked the same and he almost did not get it because it reminded him of so many memories of them together.

Looking over to his right, he can almost see her now. Her eyes bright and her hair shining as she settles into her place, reaching for the radio to toggle through the channels as she laughs at something he said.

The memory is frozen in time, and he wants to always remember those moments when they were in the in between, waiting for something more to happen until it didn’t, and they were back to strictly being best friends.

But even after she started dating Mike and after she got married, they still had that special connection. The one where they could just look at the other and know that something was off; they could still exchange looks across the room and know what the other was thinking.

Just because she was not his did not mean they suddenly did not know every little thing about the other one.

Just because she was not his did not mean he loved her any less.

Jay blinks hard, still looking at the empty seat beside him.

Even through it is not the same truck and she has not sat beside him in years, he knows that seat will always be hers.

He turns the ignition on and carefully pulls out into the street in no particular direction, just driving and seeing all the memories that he has with Hailey in every part of Chicago play out like a movie of their best years.

He does not know why but he ends up driving to the 21st district. The roll-up is full of cars he does not recognize but his spot that he parked in every day for almost 20 years is empty, so he swings his truck into the space like he has done a thousand times before.

It is like he is not in control of his body as something forces him out of the truck and into the district. The codes are still the same and he ends up in the bullpen—it still houses Intelligence, but he does not know it’s current members as intimately as he knew his team.

They are all young and eager and smart and when he sees them it is like he is transported back in time when he, Hailey, Kim, Kevin and Adam were the rising stars of the CPD, and they were the unit everyone looked to when they needed answers.

Jay thinks they must be out running surveillance because the room is empty and there are mugshots of up and coming shot callers for the Latin Players, so they are clearly in the middle of working a case.

The room is still basically laid out like it was when he was in the unit. He can still see Kim grinning at Adam who is covering his head from the paper balls Hailey is throwing at him, Kevin standing off to the side shaking his head in amusement.

He can still hear the laughter and the arguments and the teasing. He can still smell the coffee in the air and feel the sunlight streaming through the windows like nothing had ever changed but it had because now he is the only one left who remembers that point in history.

Jay gravitates toward his desk, the one he sat at when he was just the other detective in the unit, the one that was right across from Hailey’s and when he sits down in the seat for the first time in years, he notices the single envelope sitting on the desk.

He is surprised to see his name scrawled across the front and tears prick his eyes because he immediately knows who it is from.

Even after all these years, he would recognize her handwriting anywhere. The slightly messy, looping scrawl he used to tease her for.

He does not know how this got here or how Hailey knew he would be here, but he should not be surprised because she always did know him better than he knew himself.

The way his hands are shaking has nothing to do with his old age as he opens the envelope and pulls out what appears to be a letter handwritten by Hailey. Unfolding the paper, he uses a hand to wipe away the tears that have already gathered there at just the sight of her familiar handwriting.

He begins to read, and he can hear her voice just as clear as if she were there reading it to him with a fond smile playing at her lips.

To my dearest Jay,

If you are reading this it means that I am no longer here. I have to say, I am impressed you managed to outlive me because for a while there I thought for sure you were going to die well before your time because you kept getting shot.

He cannot help but chuckle because of course, she would find a way to shove that back in his face one last time.

There is a lot I want to say. More than I could ever write in a letter because I don’t think I could ever fully articulate my thoughts and feelings. I never really had to do that with you anyway—you always just knew but I am not there to tell you so I guess I will just have to do my best here because I need you to know how much you mean to me.

I have so many regrets regarding us and I’m not saying this to make you feel bad. I want you to know that I truly loved my life and I lived it as fully as I could, but I need you to know how much I wish thing between us could have worked out differently.

Because I love you, Jay.

“Oh Hailey,” He choaks out, tears dripping onto the sheets of paper, “I love you too. So much, you have no idea.”

Not for the first time Jay is crushed by the fact he never managed to say those words out loud to her and it is even more heartbreaking that he will never get another chance to let her know how much she means to him.

He blinks rapidly and forces himself to keep reading.

There I finally said it after all these years… Or wrote it down anyways.

I love you and I have always loved you and I will always love you.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband and I love my children, but Jay—you were always the one for me. Always.

I love Mike but I don’t think I was ever in love with him. Not in the way I was with you.

I could never fall for Mike or anyone else for that matter because they were not you.

He knows what she means because that is the reason he has never settled down. There was really no one after he met Hailey and honestly, he had no interest because everyone paled in comparison to her.

It is not that he did not want to date, or that he was choosing not to out of spite or pettiness, he just knew that he would never love anyone like he loved Hailey and he did not think that was fair to someone.

He honestly did not want to love someone that was not Hailey, and he was okay with that.

I was never one to really believe in fate or destiny or the concept of soulmates, but Jay, I think you were mine.

You were always my best friend and then you were my soulmate.

I think I always knew you were it for me—I knew I wanted it to be you, but I don’t think I really realized how much it was supposed to be you until after it was too late. Until I was old and grey, and I had lived my life always feeling like something was missing.

I didn’t want to admit it to myself, but it was you. I always knew that even before I forced myself to move on because I thought we had missed our chance. God, what I wouldn’t give to go back and just wait for however long it took—even if we never ended up together because I missed you.

I missed you every time we drifted further apart, and I missed you when we were together—I missed you because I knew I could never have you in the way I needed.

And I’m not talking in a lustful sense—I wanted to tell you things and spend time with you and do all the things we used to do before Mike. I couldn’t share my secrets and my feelings and my thoughts with the one person I wanted because I had a husband waiting for me at home. A husband who was expecting me to tell him all the things I used to tell you.

I wanted you. The person that knew me better than I knew myself. The person that was there from what felt like the very beginning.

I needed you. The person who went through hell and back with me, who never let me go and who never ever let me down.

But timing is everything just like you said, and I really do believe we were right for each other. Once upon a time we were supposed to be together.

But it is a cruel world, and the reality is life changes before you can even blink and then suddenly everything that you had is no longer familiar to you.

I do believe you were supposed to be my last love, the person I was supposed to grow old with, but I sometimes think that maybe we met too soon or not soon enough, or something happened, and we messed everything up because we went against fate.

We were so perfect for each other but somehow, the universe always found a way to tear us apart—your dad, Adam, Kelton, you being shot, New York…my decisions.

It’s like when everything you could ever want is right in front of you but no matter what you do, you can’t catch it.

And like I said before, I loved the family I had but there was a part of me that was always imagining you cooking in a house we picked out and babies playing in the floor that looked a little like me and a little like you.

It’s pathetic really how much I still dreamt it would be me and you at the end.

And, I guess in a way, it is. Me and you, here in the bullpen where it all started.

The end of our story right where it began.

It wasn’t a story out of a fairy-tale. Not by a long shot—our story was full of tears and panic and heartbreak and crushed dreams and disappointment and regret and we certainly didn’t get our happily ever after, but it was beautiful too.

Sometimes I think it would have been without a doubt easier if I had never met you, but then I wouldn’t have known the warmth of your smile or the joy I felt when I heard you laugh.

I would have missed out on the trust and the joy and the love and my life would have held far less meaning than it did.

All of the times we spent drinking and crying and laughing. The memories, the thoughts, the feelings—I carried them all in my heart close and dear and I pulled them out from time to time when missing you got overwhelmingly too much.

Like now as I write this letter. Like always really.

I could write forever and never tell you all that is in my heart, but I just wanted you to know how much I loved and dreamt of you. How much I wished and regretted.

I don’t really know what happens now. I don’t know what life is after death which is funny seeing as how we looked it in the face every day over the course of several decades, but I was never scared of it. The only thing I was really scared of was losing you, so I guess I’m telling you to hurry up and join me wherever I am.

Now, don’t take this as permission to go get yourself shot. Take your time, but also not too much time, okay?

Kind of ironic I’m telling you it’s okay to die whenever after I spent so many years begging you not to, isn’t it?

But you always did say you’d follow me anywhere, so I guess I’m telling you it’s okay to follow me now.

I love you, Jay Halstead.

Your partner always,

Detective Hailey Anne Upton

Fresh teardrops cover days old, dried ones and it is not lost on him that she signed her name the way she was signing it when he met her.

He sees a flash of blue eyes and blonde ponytail striding into a bank. Her voice echoing in his mind, sharp and clear as she declares that she is Detective Upton from Robbery-Homicide.

Back when she was his.

Jay slowly places a kiss over the loopy handwriting before pocketing the letter reverently and pushing himself up from his desk.

He walks down the main stairs, ignoring the hustle and bustle of police officers moving about the district and he sees moment after moment of his partnership with Hailey play out with each step he takes.

Down the front steps, turning the corner, sitting on the bench that has been there ever since he could remember.

How many lunches from a local food truck has he shared with Hailey on this bench?

He sits there and he remembers. He remembers all of the ‘I’d follow you blind’s’ and ‘we’ll always be good’s’.

All the times he looked beside him to find her laughing or smiling or teasing. The times she let him in and showed him the deepest, darkest parts of herself. The times where she pushed him, and he pushed her.

Always behind or beside or in front, watching his six and keeping his head on straight when the load got too heavy.

Every raid and stakeout and bust. All the times she was his right-hand man, his sounding board when he did not know what to do.

She always had the answer.

He knows he would have never made it without Hailey, and he does not know how he will make it now.

He blinks, reaching into his pocket for the letter and he sits there until day turns into night staring at her handwriting leaping up at him.

He sits there and he misses her.

He sits there and he closes his eyes.

He sits there and he looks for her.

And then he sees it. Her youthful smile looking at him, welcoming him, loving him and he smiles back.

God, he missed her.

Of course, he missed her. She was his partner.

#Chicago PD #upstead #upstead fanfiction #hailey upton #jay halstead #please don't kill me

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chastiefoul · 3 years

Text

first kiss(es) | itafushi.

word count : 2.045

in which Itadori tell Fushiguro he is cute. very cute.

---

Itadori and Fushiguro had made hanging out together every night a habit. There is hardly any day where they did not go to each other’s room where they did everything and also nothing. Some nights it would be movies, with Itadori spoiling everything unintentionally. Due to the training he just had not so while back ago, he already knew most of the famous movies were all about.

Itadori would like to call it knowledge but Fushiguro had made it perfectly clear that it was just straight up bragging.

Some other nights it’d also be quiet, with the dark-haired male reading and Itadori playing on his phone. Whether it’s loud or the opposite, it’s clear that these guys enjoyed the company of one another.

Though there is also a rare night like this. Where they both somehow laying on the bed with nothing to do, the sliding door that led outside opened a bit on purpose, just to let enough wind went in. Itadori would sneak a hand to Fushiguro’s raven locks, tracing his finger slightly along the strand of hair. Physical contact wasn’t something the younger male was familiar with at all but unless you had confronted him about this, not once Fushiguro had ever complained the subtle gesture.

Not that he should.

Itadori drew his hand back just to get something out of the boy beside him. Fushiguro that had been closing his eyes for the entire time turned his expression into somewhat of a discontent when the hand that was on his head was no longer there. It did not went unnoticed for Itadori as he chuckled softly,

“You know Fushiguro, I’ve been thinking about this for a while.. But you’re really cute aren’t you?” The salmon-haired man grinned, his eyes glistened with a slight obvious adoration, except of course not really to the oblivious friend of his. At this Fushiguro raised an eyebrow, annoyed. “Haah?” He said, displeasured, though if it wasn’t for the minimum light, it could be seen that Fushiguro’s face has been tinted with the color pink of embarrassment.

“See? That’s cute.” Itadori continued, still smiling. Clearly seeing how happy Itadori was teasing him, Fushiguro turned his back, sulking. “Shut up,” he mumbled incoherently with whatever little amount fight left in him.

“Still cute,” Itadori smiled yet again. “Honestly, you-“ Before Fushiguro’s complaint even reached its end, Itadori grabbed the shikigami user’s shoulder, and pinned him down against the bed. The gesture was perfect in timing, it was not rough nor it’s uncomfortable, it’s just right. At least that’s what Fushiguro think so, cause he shouldn’t know, he never encountered a circumstance such as this before.

Even then, Itadori totally caught him off guard, Fushiguro’s face clearly flushed, eyes running away.

“Yeah, totally cute.” His usual grin came back, looking down contently to a pair of dark blue orbs that belonged to Fushiguro. The gesture irked the raven-haired man way more than it should, he went to grab Itadori’s face, gripping it as a way of getting back at him.

“Ow, ow, quit being so harsh!” Itadori grabbed Fuhiguro’s wrist, stopping it before it’s harming his face any further. “Then quit being an idiot,” Fushiguro said with an annoyed tone, though as if contradicting himself, his one hand went limp, giving to Itadori’s touch completely.

Seeing that as a stamp of approval and an invitation to keep going, Itadori slowly drew his face closer to Fushiguro’s, bringing his gaze to his lips, making it obvious as to what Itadori wanted.

“Can I?” He lingered there for a moment before bringing his eyes back to Fushiguro’s gaze.

The latter man shivered under the usual goofy boy’s stare, though it wasn’t really an expression of scared but more like, excited? He never even thought about getting in a position such as this with his friend let alone finding out that he was actually eager for Itadori to kiss him?

Not letting his pride slid down yet, Fushiguro decided to be mischief about it, though honestly he was just as desperate as the other male to have his lips’ need met. “Can you what?” Fushiguro himself was surprised that he could manage a voice barely above a whisper, considering Itadori’s hot breath pressed against his jaw was kind of threatening Fushiguro’s insanity.

Yet, it was the same for Itadori. When you were pining someone below you to find out he had the prettiest face and had been looking at you with a gaze so desperate underneath those long lashes, it’s kind of decided early that Fushiguro Megumi is a man with a tremendous charm, and an irresistible one at that.

Wait scratch that. Itadori had always known that Fushiguro is beautiful. Stunning, even, if he dared to be dramatic about it. So it wasn’t a surprise anymore that situations like these are bound to happen, exactly like how people around them had been saying.

How Kugisaki had shared a knowing look that the both of them were too tired to interpret, how Gojo had been snickering quietly everytime the two of them were in the same room. Also the time where Inumaki given up a seat besides Fushiguro just for Itadori to sit, and that time too, and many more times after that too.

Everyone had long been involved in that relationship, before Itadori and Fushiguro could even figure out what was it in their chest that felt painfully tight, everytime the room visit occurred.

“Kiss you,” Itadori finished, drawing his lips dangerously close to Fushiguro’s, stopping at just the right distance upon not hearing a yes from the boy below him, though he’s guessing it was just to be annoying. “You always ask too many questions,” Fushiguro let out quietly, just enough for Itadori to hear, and just enough to let him know that he needed it fast.

Itadori smiled into the kiss as the younger male circled his arms around Itadori’s neck, bringing him even closer. Their lips met each other at an agonizing pace, yet it was just right for them and no one else. Though a tad sloppy for a bunch of firsts, it was just as passionate as any other kiss that happened at nights on different places. The kiss between the two was not any less meaningful than the couples that shared a goodbye kiss at mornings where one of them had to leave, it was not any less sweet than a quick surprise kiss they had seen so many lovers done, and it was definitely not less than a kiss that was shared between two platonic friends anywhere in the worl-

Wait. Why are they kissing?!

The teasing- That’s where Itadori usually knew where to draw the line and to not ever cross it, but as it’s been said before, they didn’t get a night like this that much. The dim room, the cozy breeze, the exhausment that could make anyone’s head is not on the right mind, and each other. It was a crazy coincidence that at the same time after staring each other for a good amount, Itadori had known that he will never meet a man more desirable than Fushiguro, and no one will ever has this magnetic effect on pulling him constantly just to be with the said person.

And the latter man has never wanted so much when he grew up, but that kiss that longed for him a moment ago, he felt like he could kill just to have his vacant lips be filled with Itadori’s. No, not just for that night where he was swept off his feet, but for next morning, and also a long time after that.

Realization descended after them at the same time, they both pulled away from the kiss. As painful as it was.

For a solid minute, there’s just silence. Both of them still trying to pick the words that had to be said after that happened. When the both of them finished observing whatever it was so interesting about the bedroom sheets –as they’ve been staring at it so intently- they both said at the same time.

”So-“

“I-“

“You first,” Fushiguro yielded characteristically. “Okay,” Itadori agreed, taking a deep breath somehow nervous, but isn’t it a bit too late for that considering the intense proximity they both just experienced?

“Shouldn’t there be something, you know, before this part?” The pink-haired boy said sheepishly, eyes darted around. Fushiguro was no better, his ears were red all the way to the tip, his heart beat loudly against his ribcage. “Like a confession?” Still, he managed.

“Like a confession.” Itadori confirmed, his gaze finally returned and rested it on Fushiguro’s.”Okay, you go first,” the younger male started—someone had to. “Wha-why me?!” Itadori protested.

“You kissed me first,” Fushiguro stated, “You kissed me back!” Itadori stared at him in disbelief, mostly because how he thought Fushiguro could get away with this with a weak argument such as that.

“Right, shouldn’t that be enough..” Fushiguro stopped halfway, not used to wearing his heart on his sleeve, “proof.. that I want you?” He finished, the last part was barely a mumble. Still, Itadori managed to get that. Of course he did. He never, not once, did not listen to what the quiet boy had to say.

Hearing that, a shade of pink appeared on Itadori’s face, a few darker shade that the one he has on his hair. He smiled through it, grinning from ear to ear. “Me too. I want you too. No, Not just because you said that first, but truly, I’ve wanted you for a very long time. I like you so much Fushiguro, Maybe I’ve just been too scared about this confrontation because of the change it might bring to us, or to you. I guess I was scared you’d look at me differently and honestly that would be worst thing to ever happened.” He reached out to the slender finger Fushiguro owned, holding it gently. The neediness and urgence that was once there has turned into an act so prudent.

That tugged some of Fushiguro’s heart strings, the rarity of a warm feeling engulfed him. “Stupid, the only change I’m going through right now is that realizing that turns out I can like you more than I already was.” His heart is full, to some extent, though it’s a very scary thing to admit, that Itadori has become such an important person to him that it is not possible for Fushiguro to be whole anymore without him in his life.

Without any further prompt, they both knew that words are no longer needed. Itadori reached out, this time with certainty and spring on his hands, Fushiguro just closed his eyes surrendering his lips, but how surprised he got when the one who made contact with the other male was his eyelids, so gentle, exceptionally incredibly loving, he couldn’t help but be overwhelmed with heaviness inside his stomach.

The kiss didn’t stop there, feather lightly trailing along the dark-haired male’s jaw like teasing because Itadori knew it wasn’t enough. Fushiguro was more sure of that because he could feel the smirk forming beside him.

Yet before letting Fushiguro has anything to protest against him, Itadori pressed a soft kiss, exactly like the one Fushiguro had been hoping for. He couldn’t help but smile and gave in, their mouth moving in an attempt to match each other. Honestly? They had no idea what they’re doing but it felt so damn good. The genuiness of a first kiss (well, second if you counted the impulsive teenage boys’ hormones) flew right between the two of them, there’s this rawness that felt like an electric spark every time their lips met each other. They couldn’t get enough, even though it was clear from the conversation they just had that doing this is something they’re gonna do a lot in the future to a point where they could already hear Kugisaki groaning and rolled her eyes at them, looking so done.

They pulled away, faces still extremely close to each other as if it pains them if it’s the opposite.

Still smiling, Itadori asked, “Now what?”

Fushiguro pretended to ponder for a moment, “Do that all over again?”

“Okay.”

They laughed, before leaning in yet again.

Let’s just say, those are a lot of kisses for a first kiss.

#this is purely self indulgent #itafushi #fushita #itadori x fushiguro #fushiguro x itadori #yuji x megumi

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saladejin · 3 years

Text

Admire | 07

Seokjin x Fem!Reader | arranged marriage!au, husband!Seokjin | Strangers to lovers, angst, self discovery, loneliness in luxury, touch starvation (eventual smut), eventual domestic fluff

Summary: You’d never needed anyone else. Growing up alone, living alone, existing alone. It all came naturally and effortlessly, quite like breathing. That was until your somewhat distant parents finally decided it was time to make good on a promise. One they’d made before you were even born.

Warnings: Things are getting a lil saucier

Word Count: 5k

A/N: Whew, finally we’re up to date. I FINALLY got around to re-editing and revamping this latest chapter, but once again I’m sorry for the delay on it. Now I can start focusing on my wips :))

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The driver bid you both a chaste farewell and soon you were making your way up to house both of you had grown used to sharing. These days, it was simply your safe space, a place you’d slowly begun to warm up to, where you could live and work peacefully in the unimposing presence of your husband, who worked equally as hard for his family.

This was your place to finally belong, the stupidly large mansion that could house ten more of you plus your family with ease, but alas it was still your mansion.

Our … mansion.

You couldn’t recall the moment where you’d begun to think of it as a home rather than a house. In your mind, it wasn’t really the house itself, but rather the people who lived there that made it a place you could truly call home.

You looked over to Seokjin and suppressed a sigh of built up emotion. The man was currently bringing most of the bags inside without a hitch, making use of his broad shoulders and hauling weight as if he weren’t wielding enough hierarchical power to get it brought in for him by the driver. Watching the scene only reminded you of how much had changed during your time away.

For one, Seokjin had shocked you with how easily he’d adapted to the different atmosphere and routine. There were no complaints from him about accommodation, food, or even the over-the-top rowdiness and friendliness of the company. He’d taken it all on board with a curiosity you honestly found adorable, and even adopted some of the various mannerisms. Watching him carrying all the luggage inside was just an example of his new way of living, one you chose to call ‘like a normal person’.

You were also growing closer somehow. The usually stoic man had opened up significantly, and you were discovering new things about him just as quickly as he discovered them himself. For instance, he found an enjoyment for cooking after helping some of the uncles with their traditional barbeque, he’d shown interest in acquiring a guitar for himself as soon as he could, and he was becoming more talkative as he began relaxing his hold on the professional barrier between you.

It was as if he was finally allowing himself to live the kind of life he always wanted. No luxurious parties, no expectations, no having to save face with every public outing. You were a messy mixture of nerves, uneasiness, and excitement at the prospect of getting to know Seokjin for who he was.

He had to discover who he was first, though.

“Dinner will be delivered soon.” His voice filtered out from the kitchen area distantly, and only then you realised you’d been standing in the front entrance in a daze. Lost in your thoughts like a fool. Even so, it was hard to miss the odd note hidden deep within his tired voice.

“Why do you sound disappointed? Is it not what you wanted?” you queried while leaving your bags at the front door for someone to collect later. You made your way into the living room with probing eyes, trying to find where his voice was coming from before spotting his black mop of hair scattered on the back of the lounge.

He didn’t respond at first, only met your gaze with his own investigative ones. You sat down heavily on the other lounge with a sharp exhale. Seokjin drummed his fingers against the leather while lifting one leg to cross over the other elegantly, and you knew he was just trying to avoid talking about what was on his mind.

“You can tell me, you know.” You rolled your eyes at his silence.

He ran both hands through his hair roughly and you almost felt breathless at how messy he’d made himself, like he’d just rolled out of bed. Considering you were both still in your casual clothing from the road trip, it was a sight that made your whole body tingle with a fondness you couldn’t explain. You were just beginning to see more of his hidden personality, and that made you happy in some indescribable way.

“I don’t know, I was hoping to actually try and cook something for once. Like hyung was telling me…”

“Oh? there’s that word again,” you chuckled, trying to ignore the happy swell in your chest after hearing that he wanted to try cooking the same things from a few nights ago, “and you can get the grill out tomorrow night if you want.”

“Hmm, I’ll see how I feel. Anyway, what word?” he asked while sitting back and continuing to run his hand through his hair lazily, expression puzzled. You felt so annoyed at the longing you felt to be the one doing it for him. You had been wondering what his silky looking tresses had felt like for the longest time.

“Is it ‘hyung’?” You smiled in embarrassment, mouthing out the word carefully to try and pronounce it in an acceptable manner at least, though you could never hope to sound fluent right off the bat. Seokjin’s eyes fell to you as the word left your lips, the small lifting of his cheeks being the only hint that he was trying to suppress his amusement. The way his cocoa coloured eyes sparkled at the sound of his native tongue made your heart squirm.

“It’s a good attempt, but no it’s pronounced more like ‘hyeong’. Try it.”

“Hyung.”

“Yeah, that’s … better.”

You hid your grin with the back of your hand, eyebrows shooting up at his unsure sounding feedback. He even managed to crack a tiny smirk of his own, his full lips making him look even more model-like under the soft lighting of your living room.

“Hey, how am I meant to get it perfect straight away? Besides, I forgot what it means already,” you huffed, and brought your legs to tuck comfortably underneath you.

“It’s just a term we use to refer to older males,” he explained, letting his head fall back against the seat slowly. Seeing his eyes fluttering to a close made you wonder how tired he must’ve been feeling. After spending so much time interacting with strangers, and driving, and pretending to be your husband, you supposed.

The jarring noise of the doorbell brought you to your feet, and you went to collect your dinner from the front door as Seokjin gave a quiet nod.

Now that he’s brought it up, I think I’d prefer a home cooked meal too.

“So, am I meant to call you ‘hyung’?” You laughed inwardly while making your way back to him. You were excited to learn more about him now that he was opening up and unfurling in front of your eyes.

He had to purse his lips slightly to avoid smiling again. “No, and please don’t. It would feel way too odd to hear that from you.”

“Oh.” Your heart cracked a little, thinking of course he wouldn’t want his foreign partner to try and so poorly imitate something such as his native language, something he considered close to his heart and home. “Ah, sorry. I didn’t think-”

“It’s okay, it’s just that Korean women don’t use ‘hyung’. If you are female and want to refer to an older male, or partner…” He seemed to hesitate, as if rethinking his decision to elaborate on the subject at all. “Then you can call m- you can use ‘oppa’.”

You swallowed a mouthful of steak before attempting to copy him. “Oppa?”

Seokjin blinked before giving you a tiny nod. Not a single second passed before he was focusing back on his food, the conversation apparently hitting a weird place for him.

“I don’t have to go around calling you that. It’s not like I’m trying to adopt another culture,” you clarified for him, noting how his shoulders seemed to relax at your gentle tone. “I only want to understand you better, Seokjin.”

His hands faltered in their movements to cut the tender steak on his plate. You didn’t catch any change in his expression, as expected, but his eyes gleamed with something you could only describe as appreciation. A few months ago, neither of you probably thought you’d end up sharing your ethnic differences with one another over dinner like this.

The house had always been so silent with just the two of you, and your mind kept thinking back to your old home where there were always maids, cooks and butlers milling about. It struck you as a little peculiar, so you decided to ask.

“Sorry to change the subject, but why is it that your mother requested there to be no live-in staff here?”

Seokjin continued to eat slowly but looked up with a thoughtful gleam in his eye. “I was confused too, but she always brushed it off. Something about family traditions requiring minimal interferences? I didn’t really get it since I’d never heard of said ‘tradition’, but I never really understood her methods anyway.”

Oh…

Your face burned as you understood what he was saying. It was almost laughable, how oblivious he was to his mother’s implications. The thought probably never crossed his mind that she could be referring to the two of you having sexual relations in some way. Well, why should the thought cross his mind?

This was never meant to be anything more than a fake relationship, an array of masks worn only to fool them into believing it was true. It was easy to understand why his mother would think accordingly. You had been trying to trick her, but perhaps you’d been just a little too convincing.

“Yeah, weird huh?” You cleared your throat, offering to take up his dish as you both finished off the meals. The case of the understaffing was forgotten as you moved back to where your husband was half sprawled on the couch, but now the quiet hum of the television accompanied the room and you were thankful to have something filling the silence. Even if it was something was simple as slightly muffled voices from the people on the big screen.

You plonked back down on the leather and felt relaxation crawl up your spine in the best way. You were slowly beginning to believe that there was almost nothing better than this. Spending a night at home with someone you cared about, watching a movie or TV show, nice and warm and comfortable.

You briefly registered that in your current position, Seokjin’s arm that’d been outstretched along the back of the seat now rested just behind your neck. You thought nothing of it, knowing he sure as hell wouldn’t, but let your imagination take the reins at all the possibilities presenting themselves.

Imagining a smile tugging at his lips as he brought his arm down to drape across your shoulders. His warm hand as it cupped your jaw, a gentle thumb drawing tiny circles into the flushing skin along your cheekbone. You imagined the feeling of your smaller hand travelling up the hardened expanse of his clothed chest, feeling the lean muscle and taut ridges underneath the flimsy barrier separating skin from skin.

You felt your face flush further in surprise when your daydream was snapped away into thin air, the cushion underneath you squeaking as he suddenly moved from his slumped position.

“I’m about ready to call it a night. The driving must’ve taken more out of me than I thought,” he said while sporting a grunt of effort, his face wincing at the pop of his joints once he stretched his long legs out. As he brought his arm inwards to follow suit, you felt the slightest brush of his fingers graze your neck. The small shudder that racked your body from the sensation was instantaneous, and you knew that your shameless imagination from earlier had made the cravings for his touch worse.

Unintentionally, your body shifted to try and follow his hand before you managed to will yourself into a stiff, unmoving statue.

Shit, what was that?

You closed your eyes and blew out your cheeks in annoyance, directed at nobody but yourself. Was it really all becoming too much for you the handle at this point? When had you become so … pathetic and needy? This wasn’t like you at all.

It was only then you realised Seokjin hadn’t moved since your loss of inhibitions. You wrenched your eyes open and glanced over to him, knowing full well that his observant gaze had seen the entire display from beginning to end. Oh God no!

“(Y/n), I’ve been thinking,” came Seokjin’s voice through the robotic sounding laughs emitting from the speakers of the television. He was holding his arm awkwardly in the air just above his own lap, as if it had been electrocuted and was no longer capable of moving.

“About what? Oh, when is our next event? I forgot to ask you earlier,” you uttered faintly, trying to cover up your reddening face with one hand. There was no way he was going to let what happened slide, you knew just by seeing the pointed look in his curious dark eyes. He lowered his arm and kept his eyes fixated on your jittery form.

“Not for ages, but anyway that’s not what I was thinking about,” he said with a lazy mumble to his voice that was honestly just a little too low, teetering on seductive but obviously unintentional.

You mentally implored him to forget your stupid reactions. It was getting out of hand and you were already trying your best to rein yourself in.

“Oh?” You raised a brow, waiting for the inevitable questioning that was surely coming your way.

In all honesty, you just wanted to go shower and sleep for the next week. During the trip you’d had so many restless nights, being too caught up on the whole sharing a bed situation. It got better as time went on, but you still couldn’t shake the feeling that you weren’t meant to be there in between the sheets with him. Every time, you held yourself back from the urge to touch him and shuffle closer to his side.

Rein it in. Rein-

Seokjin finally parted his lips in to respond, “It’s just that I can’t help noticing how you get lost in your thoughts lately, along with all the other odd reactions. You keep getting this look on your face, like you’re longing for something, and I can’t help but think back to what you were saying at Taehyung’s party.”

Okay, well this was a bit more than you expected. You felt shivers of humiliation travelling up your skin at the thought of him noticing your fantasizing, of all things. Were you really becoming that obvious even in a state of subconscious? Damn, things were really worse than you thought.

“What? At Tae’s party?” you murmured, trying to awkwardly laugh it off in the process. How did he manage to call you out like that with the straightest of faces? It was almost unfair that he could be so serious and not become affected by these things.

“Yeah,” Seokjin continued. “How you said you craved human touch all the time because the way you grew up left you wanting. I realised during the trip, how content you looked when you were receiving affection from your family members … and me.”

You snapped your eyes up to him, looking to see if his expression would give anything away about what he was thinking even though you knew it was futile. To your shock, his face actually wasn’t the same blank slate you were used to seeing when he pondered. For the first time, you saw him show slight apprehension as he nibbled on his plush bottom lip.

‘And me’ he’d said. You were suddenly thrown back to that one night in the motorhome, which honestly seemed like a mere fever dream, where he’d run his hands along your body and held you close for the first time. That first night you had shared the same bed, and all the dams had broken within you.

It was the night I opened up to him, and maybe that was when he decided to do the same.

“So, I want-”

He cut himself off and sat forward, looking so bewildered and lost that you were beginning to grow concerned. At the recollection of all these memories, you were already feeling vulnerable and ashamed. His vagueness was not helping you keep your shit together.

“I want you to show me what you mean. What are you asking for when you say those things?” He finished by clasping his hands together and looking up at you as hopefully as he could, which was minimal for him. You couldn’t really believe your ears at this point.

“Show you?” you repeated in disbelief. “H-how?”

“Show me what you need,” he rephrased, straightening his back slightly and fiddling with his fingers.

It was a cute little habit you’d never seen before, but your brain could barely register that when you were already reeling from what he was saying. He was close enough that you could catch the scent of his faint cologne, and it was making your head spin faster and faster. The quiet sound of the television faded out as you focused on his beautiful eyes right in front of you.

“You want me to touch you?” You tilted your head, feeling like you were having an out-of-body experience when he nodded to confirm your suspicions.

“If that’s what you want.”

It was strange, not knowing whether to feel happy or whether to feel humiliated, or relieved, or even saddened; all because of your neediness that he’d seen way too many times.

“Okay.”

Your shoulders sagged in a strange sense of defeat. This whole impasse had been your weakness from the start, and now it was finally coming to light. You were ready to help him understand things from your point of view, and maybe he would start to see why you’d been acting this way.

He’d grown up in a similar environment, even despite some stark differences. Why couldn’t there be just a small chance that he might relate somehow?

“What do you feel when you get close to another person?” you asked softly, untangling your feet from under each other and resting them squarely on the ground in front of you. It was intimidating to look up at his looming figure this boldly, yet being so close to his body heat only seemed to put you more at ease.

You wanted to fall into him and have him cradle you in his arms, but you knew that if you were going to show him the right way, you needed to take it slow.

“I don’t feel so different. It doesn’t happen often, actually,” he mused while keeping his eyes focused on you. “When I see my mother at galas or balls, I suppose it just feels like I want to get away.”

You stifled a chuckle at the thought of his mother’s smothering putting him off. It was like that for so many kids out there, but you couldn’t share that feeling when it was lucky for you to even see your mother once in a while. Seokjin’s tensed frame seem to falter slightly when you knowingly smiled up at him. Gone was the shyness, the tiptoeing, the never-ending feeling of restraint.

This was your husband in front of you, and now he was asking you to touch him.

“That’s understandable Seokjin, but I mean in other instances where it’s perhaps more welcomed, or even instigated mainly by you. Say, you see your brother after a long time, so you hug him. Yes?”

The man’s black hair bounced slightly as he nodded. You hadn’t made any moves to be closer to him yet, and you could sense his confusion, but truly it was best to go gradual for him to understand. Rather than you just throwing yourself at him in a barrage of limbs.

“How does that make you feel, compared to how you feel normally?” you tried again, your eyes wide with a curiosity that probably burned even brighter than his. A month or so ago, you never would’ve thought you’d be having such a close and intimate conversation about his relationships.

Clearly, the road trip had not only changed you both in multiple ways, but it had also changed the very dynamic tying you together. The foundations of your relationship, and what it meant to each of you. The man sitting before you now was nothing but a far cry from the man you’d once faced at the altar. As foolish as it was, you could not be prouder of him.

“I suppose I was taught to just do it in certain situations. I never thought about how it made me feel,” he offered in a low voice, brows furrowing as he tried thinking about how he could be more helpful. The slight pout to his pinkish lips had your heart beating erratically.

“Seokjin, do you care about me?” you asked, and time drew to a stop.

This was the kind of question you told yourself you would never ask him. It was almost impossible to answer considering your circumstances, and the owlish look in his eyes told you that you were right in thinking so.

“Yes.”

Your world resumed spinning, but the silence continued. Honestly, you didn’t think you would have kept it together if he’d answered no. You loved him, that much you were sure of, but before the holiday you had been confused about whether you cared for the man so strongly out of your pure desire for close friendship and companionship. You weren’t dense though. These feelings were far more than that, and you were an idiot for entertaining them.

You stared into each other’s eyes, trying to read foreign minds and figure out what it all meant. He cared about you, and you cared about him. That much was a given, but the true depth of that fact remained a constant unknown. He exhaled sharply, almost as if he couldn’t really believe he’d answered so sincerely. So quickly.

“I didn’t think I would, but since the beginning you’ve turned out to be quite different than who I thought I’d be married to. My life … changed, but it was seamless and easy compared to the complicated mess I thought I was going to have to deal with,” he explained with sad eyes. His gaze had been trained on the floor since he’d given you ‘yes’ as an answer.

You shifted closer and brought one hand up to lift his lowered jaw, angling it to face you so you could see his inquisitive eyes once more. His large hands remained clenched in his lap, unsure of what to do at this point.

“Seokjin I care about you too, so you don’t have to feel like you’re on your own here.” You laughed quietly, noticing his shoulders relax as you moved your hand up to rest on the side of his face. Your fingertips buried themselves into the shorter strands of his hair.

If only he knew the true extent of my feelings.

You cleared your throat, trying to push away the intrusive thoughts before they took over, and switched your teacher mode on quickly. “This is a … type of contact that you can kind of do anytime, and you can even play with the person’s hair, or just kind of massaging gently.”

You demonstrated by slowly bringing your hands up to run through his marvelous black locks, lips parting in amazement at the feeling of his soft hair you’d always imagined combing back with your fingers. Your other hand shaped itself to his face as you tried your best to stop yourself from leaning any further forward.

You couldn’t kiss him like this just yet. Not when it would actually mean something to him, for the first time.

“Why do you say ‘the person’s’? You know I wouldn’t have the nerve to try this with anyone else, right?” He murmured unexpectedly; his eyes somewhat nervous at what you were implying. You were quick to push your surprise away and nodded, because it was the only response you could think of.

He took a small but deep breath to regain himself, letting his stoic persona continue to melt underneath your touch. “May I?” he asked in a soft voice, and once again all you could do was nod your head.

He brought one of his hands up hesitantly and you couldn’t help a small fond smile at the way he was concentrating so intently on the movement. As soon as his hand made contact with the skin of your cheek, you couldn’t stop yourself from leaning into it. He watched in wonder as your eyes fluttered shut, his other hand now carding itself through your slightly messy hair.

If you’d been a cat, you were certain a distinct sound of purring would emanate from your throat.

He smoothed all your hair back until it was no longer ruffled, and then brought both hands back to cradle your face once more. You didn’t realise you’d been leaning forward and running your hands up his chest until the moment you reached his shirt collar, and your eyes zeroed in on the expanse of his neck just long enough to see his Adam’s apple bob up and down in a hard swallow.

“Um, now you can touch a bit lower if you want. Or just hold my hands if you’re more comfortable with that,” you breathed, trying to bring your thoughts to a focal point while removing your hands from him sharply. He looked so picturesque up this close. You just wanted to stay in this position for hours upon hours.

“Like this?” He voiced hoarsely. You tried to keep your breathing normal as one of his hands fell down to encompass yours, but the other traced the line of your jaw before gliding downwards and brushing against the tender skin of your neck. Just has he had in the beginning before all of this had started.

“Yeah.”

You almost whimpered at the tingling sensation, but kept it in for the sake of the exercise. This man was absolutely dangerous for your wellbeing. It wasn’t even his actions at this point, just his undivided attention and careful eyes tracing over the curve of your figure that had your insides turning to jelly.

“That’s probably enough for now. I can hear your brain working,” you spoke and let out an airy laugh when his fingers hesitated in their descent. It was as if he was trying to compute too much information at once, and somehow, the way he was trying his best was oddly charming.

He grunted. “I’m just- I’m trying to understand you.”

“I know, and I appreciate it,” you responded with a genuine smile, noticing how his words mirrored your own from earlier back when you’d butchered his native tongue. “Now I don’t know about you, but I’m so exhausted I could pass out.”

“Yeah, now I’m really calling it a night.” He cleared his throat with a sigh, mind clearly burning out from the overload of new experiences.

He stood from the couch so suddenly, a stiffness taking hold of his movements. Just what was going through his head at a time like this? You missed his close proximity almost immediately.

Like a robot programmed to move, you also heaved your body up from where it was beginning to sink into the cushions. This whole turn of events seemed unreal, and you could feel your heart still throbbing in your chest at the feeling of Seokjin underneath your fingertips. He had been so warm and had looked so beautiful.

You ran your fingers through your hair as the silence permeated the air, the only sounds being your husband's gentle footsteps as he packed away a few things around the house. You gathered your own bags from the front door and sluggishly traipsed towards your bedroom at the opposite end of the hallway.

I don't want to be on my own.

The invasive thought made you take a few shaky steps back. You were ready to put everything at risk and confess to him how lonely and in love you were, yet to your surprise the sound of his voice softly calling your name made you falter in your tracks.

You stood in the doorway looking outwards as he loitered in front of his own bedroom door at the opposite end, one large hand resting on the doorknob as if he'd been hesitating to open it.

"Did you hear me?"

You relaxed your stance, a sudden embarrassment beginning to settle in at how eager your movements were. "Yeah? What is it?"

Please let me stay with you. Please let me-

"Isn't it - doesn't it seem strange?" He seemed to inwardly backpedal all of a sudden, his pretty eyes falling to the floor and his slightly down-turned nose twitched in regret. "I mean, sorry if this is weird, but after sharing a bed for the entire road trip, doesn't it feel strange to suddenly go back to our own rooms?"

“Ah.” You somehow managed to suppress a hefty sigh of relief, pure ecstasy shooting through your body like some special brand of heroin. You tried to bump up his courage with a reassuring smile. "Jin yes, I still want to spend the night with you."

His eyes rose from the floor as the burden lifted from his mind, shoulders seeming to shake free the stiffness that had taken hold of them ever since the couch fiasco.

"I'm glad. Come over here then."

#seokjin x reader #seokjin scenarios #btsghostie #btsgoldnet #seokjin smut #seokjin imagines #seokjin series #jin smut #seokjin angst #seokjin fluff #arranged marriage au #husband jin #bts jin #bts smut #jin angst #admire #saladejin

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the-widow-sisters · 3 years

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Summary: When Yelena begs Natasha to let her go to one of the cool kids meetings, she quickly realizes she made a huge mistake. She is bored out of her mind. Luckily, Natasha keeps her distracted with her gentle affection, but that quickly becomes quite embarrassing given their company.

Word Count: 2243

“And that’s why we need to initiate this protocol. We have to try to improve our—”

It was quickly becoming clear to Yelena that she never wanted to go to anything called a collaborative conference ever again. And if she ever forgot that lesson and wanted to go again, then she would specifically hire someone to slap her in the face and shake her out of her episode of insanity.

Steve Rogers was a really nice guy, albeit a goody-two shoes, but he definitely could not hold the attention of any audience whatsoever. He was one of the most boring speakers that Yelena had ever heard, but she had to at least pretend that she was paying a little bit of attention to him, despite the fact that she did not care about anything he was saying at all.

The only reason she was here was after begging Natasha to let her come so she could earn more favor from the group and hopefully more greatly secure her place with them and get them to officially initiate her on the team.

Natasha was sitting next to her at the moment, her eyes on Steve. To most people, she was attentively hanging on his every word. However, Yelena could easily see that her sister was somewhat unfocused since it seemed that she was more just looking through him than at him. It was clear to Yelena that Natasha was as bored as her.

So Yelena did what any self-respecting younger sister would do. She very surreptitiously pinched Natasha’s leg under the table in an attempt to simultaneously aggravate Natasha and get her attention. The redhead immediately turned her head to face Yelena, confusion and slight irritation in her gaze as she was drawn back into the real world outside of her own mind.

Yelena just grinned a little, mouthing the word “boring” to her older sister with a bit of an eyeroll and a miming of a loud groan. Natasha immediately understood, sighing a bit and leaning nearer to the blonde while keeping her eyes on Steve carefully.

“We’ve only got about five more minutes,” Natasha softly spoke, and Yelena’s eyes widened a little with surprise, joy from the prospect of getting out of the stuffy little room suddenly flooding through her.

“Only five more minutes? That’s a blessing,” Yelena whispered, her words barely above a breath as she smiled with relief as her posture loosened significantly. Natasha smirked a tiny bit, and Yelena quickly lost her smile, knowing that her sister’s mirth was definitely not a good sign.

“And then we have to give our input on the whole thing,” Natasha explained to her with a smug look in her eyes, and Yelena almost groaned aloud as she just looked at Natasha with something that could only be described as pure suffering.

“You have got to be kidding me,” Yelena quietly replied, and Natasha just flashed her an affectionate, slightly pitying smile.

“You practically begged me to let you come, remember?” Natasha whispered to her, her mouth not far from Yelena’s ear. Yelena could easily hear her amusement despite the quietness of her voice. Yelena flashed her a halfhearted glare in response. Yelena could easily see that Natasha was enjoying this way too much and she was quickly starting to realize that her suffering in this meeting was becoming Natasha’s entertainment for the afternoon.

“I didn’t know it was going to be like watching paint dry,” Yelena sarcastically informed her, her eyes half-lidded as she just locked her eyes with the redhead’s light green eyes. Natasha just huffed in reply, shrugging noncommittally with a lopsided grin and returning her gaze to Steve as he concluded his speech and quieted, giving them all a chance to voice their thoughts.

It was all that Yelena could do not to groan when someone piped up and started presenting an opposite opinion to the super soldier, which launched them all into a debate. She took that opportunity to just lean forward and rest her elbow on the table while propping up her chin with a hand, the entire room abuzz with conversation that she really had no input in whatsoever.

She had almost totally zoned out when she suddenly heard Natasha start speaking. Everyone quieted, and Yelena was shaken back into reality just from the sheer quiet that fell across the room as they listened to Natasha’s words.

It was then that Yelena truly understood the quiet power that Natasha held in the room. It was shocking to her just how well-respected that the redhead was. She had never really thought about it before, but she now was starting to realize that almost any time Natasha wanted something to happen, it would come together for her. Any time Yelena wanted to come along on a mission, Natasha saw to it that it happened, and Yelena knew that it could not have been something that was commonly allowed.

It made her somehow admire her big sister even more. Of course, she would sooner die than admit that fact, but she nevertheless felt it deep within her as she stared at Natasha.

Once Natasha had finished her piece, everyone started conversation about Natasha’s input. Yelena stared at the side of her sister’s face, and Natasha glanced in Yelena’s direction, hesitating as she realized Yelena was looking at her. Yelena just raised an eyebrow at her, and Natasha smiled a little.

Soon enough, things grew boring again as the rest of the group were arguing and Yelena started to lose interest, her eyes glazing over a little as she just stared in a random direction, not really paying any attention to anyone.

However, she was swiftly grounded when she felt a gentle hand on her back. Yelena glanced in Natasha’s direction quizzically, recognizing the touch immediately. Natasha was not even looking in her direction and actually seemed to be somewhat invested in the conversation occurring before them.

Yelena, on the other hand, could not think about much besides how nice the contact felt and how she just wanted to melt on the spot. She also was a bit stuck on just how embarrassed she was going to be if she gave in to those impulses.

To her pure surprise, Natasha slipped her hand underneath the blonde’s shirt and started gently tracing along her back, her fingers tickling barely in the softest of touches. Yelena almost froze up, but the sensations were just so comforting.

Yelena could not even really bring herself to turn away Natasha’s affections, and she felt her stomach twist uncomfortably as she realized that the Avengers were going to inevitably see her so weak and defenseless. She really did not want them to witness her in that state. However, she definitely did not want Natasha to stop gently raking her fingers along her back in that manner that always made her feel so immensely loved.

She tried to fight the urge to lean against Natasha, valiantly holding out against Natasha’s gentle touches. She knew she could not hold out for long, but she was going to do the best she could for as long as possible.

She felt Natasha running her fingers along her back in a specific pattern, and Yelena swiftly felt a letter “I” on her back. Natasha swiped carefully, erasing, and then wrote “love.” Yelena knew precisely where this was going, remembering the last time Natasha had pulled this trick when they were alone in their house and definitely not surrounded by the cool kids. It made Yelena’s heart ache with love and adoration before, and it was having that same effect now. She knew that as soon as Natasha wrote the last word on her back, she would be unable to resist just melting into her sister.

Sure enough, Natasha wrote “you” on her back, and after a long moment of the most resistance that she could possibly manage, she finally leaned over sideways and rested her head against Natasha’s shoulder heavily. As soon as she did, she felt a huge weight leave her and most of the irritation about the stupid conference disappearing in favor of basking in the love offered to her by the redhead. Embarrassment was coursing through her almost as strongly, but not persistently enough to make her move away from Natasha’s touch.

She quickly noticed that Clint had immediately noticed them, and she supposed that was not the most embarrassing person to see it, but she still felt quite a bit of humiliation anyway. However, it did not seem to phase Natasha’s gentle strokes and touches at all, and Yelena just looked down at the table, avoiding looking at Clint.

“Is she okay?” Steve suddenly questioned after several beats, and Yelena felt her stomach drop to her feet, embarrassment flooding over her as she realized more than just Clint had apparently noticed her. However, she still could not quite pull away from her sister’s affections, instead moving her face to hide it a little in Natasha’s shoulder.

“Yeah, of course,” Natasha replied, a bit of humor in her voice, and Yelena felt as if she might die from pure embarrassment as she realized that Natasha found her humiliation to be quite humorous.

“Huh. Who would’ve thought that disaster Russian number two had such a soft side?” Tony commented, and Yelena felt herself bristle a bit. She could practically feel Natasha’s gaze on her.

“She’s a cutie,” Natasha doted on her, her voice affectionate in an almost teasing sort of way, and Yelena pulled her head away from Natasha’s shoulder, stubbornly looking away from the group and her sister as well. This was growing to be much too humiliating.

She could feel Natasha starting to move her hand away from her, but Yelena just moved her back and followed Natasha’s hand. Despite her embarrassment, she was not giving up the attention now.

“Oh, and you can pet her like a housecat, too?” Tony asked, laughing a little, and it was then that Natasha’s hand froze on Yelena’s back. Yelena could almost feel the joking tone in the air totally drop in favor of something much graver and more serious as Natasha apparently did not entirely take that last comment as a joke and it crossed into risky territory.

“Man, I’ve got to get me one of those,” Tony pointed out in his typical manner, and even though Yelena knew that he did not mean anything by it, it still made her bristle as it reminded Yelena of older days when the handlers, trainers, and higher-ups at the Red Room simply saw her as a fresh slab of meat to be distributed as they pleased. Natasha seemed to pick up on it, and Yelena could feel Natasha’s hand against her back tighten.

“So, what have we decided on?” Natasha questioned, totally skipping over the quip, but anyone could read the extreme warning in Natasha’s tone and the venom percolating just beneath the surface. She was daring every single person to challenge her and say something.

Yelena moved her head to the side, taking in Natasha’s face. Her face was neutral enough, but Yelena could see the danger in her eyes that prohibited anyone from saying anything else about Yelena. Yelena was surprised, but she was very much grateful to Natasha for her to take such a deep offense to it and stop it immediately. That last comment had definitely stepped over the line.

Everyone cleared their throat, an awkward silence falling over them before Steve suddenly called for a vote. Yelena looked at Natasha with a great bit of admiration, her heart melting despite the embarrassment that Natasha had caused her earlier.

She moved back nearer to her sister, leaning into her side heavily and not caring who saw. No one would say anything about it anyway. Not after Natasha’s display.

Soon enough, they all ended up settling on some version of the plan that resembled Natasha’s suggestion but also had some of Steve and Tony’s ideas thrown in as well. They quickly dismissed after that, and everyone dispersed.

When Yelena and Natasha were walking down the hall together in a comfortable silence, Natasha as calm as could be, Yelena spoke up.

“Thank you,” Yelena told her quietly, and Natasha raised an eyebrow, smiling affectionately at the blonde as she slowed a bit to fall more into step with Yelena.

“Nobody gets to embarrass my sister but me,” Natasha told her, an uncharacteristic lightheartedness and teasing in her voice despite the seriousness that was in her eyes. Yelena rolled her eyes, shrugging at Natasha’s arm that was now thrown over her shoulders. Natasha started to move it away, her chuckle ringing near Yelena, but the blonde reached up and grabbed Natasha’s hand, keeping her arm where it was.

“You’re a real prizewinner in the jerk category,” Yelena grumbled despite leaning into Natasha a little.

“I learned everything I knew from you.”

“Ha,” Yelena let out a short, fake bark of laughter. “You must be a fast learner if you figured it out that well in the relatively short amount of time that we’ve been reunited.”

Natasha just chuckled in reply to her. Yelena just raised an eyebrow with a smirk. After a moment, she just looked over at Natasha and eyed her softly, her heart swelling with affection. Natasha returned the gaze, her eyes conveying all the warmth in the world.

“Ya tebya lyublyu.”

“Ya lyublyu tebya yeshche bol'she.”

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