i always tell my friends i dont want to talk about marineford/post war but then i realized thats the arc i talked about most and im just oopsies !! anyway uhh
one piece post war spoilers !!! analyzing luffy's behavior in post war and it's a bit of a heavy topic (suicide implications)
i've said what i wanted to my friends but i wanna see if anyone else thought the same or im just insane
so... when luffy woke up in post war, he immediately ran for it and screamed and cried looking for ace. but he's being haunted by that traumatic moment, akainu's fist through ace's stomach... ace breaking his promise, ace's embrace, ace talking to luffy as much as he can- until his last breath... ace's blood on his hands- "STOP IT!!!!"
it kept flashing in his mind and he's trying his damndest to get it away. by punching or headbutting whatever he sees. jinbe asked law what would happen if they left luffy alone like that:
luffy would die if he was left alone. of course, with ace's request, he couldn't let that happen. so jinbe goes and sees luffy.
after tuckering himself out, luffy is aware that this is reality and not some hellish nightmare. (looking back on the panels hurt so much... it hurts to see our mc broken like this) he belittles himself, he says hes not fit to be pirate king, he's weak, he couldn't protect anyone. he couldn't save his friends and he couldn't save ace. his spirit is broken. he's alone in this world.
thats what he thought at the moment anyway... with nothing left, luffy continues hurting himself. bashing his head against the ground. maybe even until it cracks open because what the hell is luffy even good for now? might as well end it all because he's got no one and he's weak. there's no point in being pirate king if he can't protect the people he loves. and loneliness is so much worse than being in pain.
luffy would go an extra mile, push the limit, to save ace. ace gave him a place to belong when luffy literally had nowhere else to stay. he'd go so far to save his brother even if it meant his own life.
if he can't save ace, he'd want to die. but... ace couldn't let that happen. ace still had to save his little brother. despite going through literal levels of hell to save ace, it was all for nothing.
and god don't get me started how ecstatic luffy was when he set ace free. and that they fought together, back to back. but it all ended within moments.
whether or not he knew he'd die if he kept hurting himself like this, it's much preferable anyway. he wanted to die. he wished to be left alone but when jinbe wouldn't "it's my body!!! i can do what i like!!!" he was intentionally hurting himself. to get those thoughts away even if it meant killing himself.
but again, with ace's request, asking jinbe to look after luffy for him: he couldn't allow luffy to die. let alone kill himself like this. so jinbe had to help and 'repair' luffy's spirit. reminding him of what luffy still had.
after jinbe's speech, luffy began counting on his fingers that were once stained with his brother's blood... and started sobbing when he realized there was still people out there he loved, waiting for him. he wasn't alone in the world. they were still out there alive just like he was. likely in a safe place where no one would hurt them.
luffy remembers he still had his friends, who were also his family.
had ace not ask jinbe to look after luffy and had jinbe not obliging ace's last wish, luffy would have killed himself then. maybe law would have stepped in as he willingly saved his life (and needed him for future reference) but i dont think he'd have much impact as jinbe because jinbe was there imprisoned with ace, listening to his story and how dear luffy is to him.
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