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bananaofswifts · 23 days

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Taylor Swift is giving fans more insight into her new album “The Tortured Poets Department,” thanks to a track-by-track experience with Amazon Music.

Fans can now listen to the album — which shattered streaming records after its release on April 19 — along with commentary from Swift breaking down the meaning of each track. To listen to “The Tortured Poets Department” with Swift’s commentary, fans can simply say to Alexa, “I’m a member of ‘The Tortured Poets Department.'”

Through the experience, Swift has revealed the inspiration behind songs including “Fortnight” with Post Malone, “Clara Bow,” “Florida!!!” with Florence + the Machine, “Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?” and “My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys.”

“‘Fortnight’ is a song that exhibits a lot of the common themes that run throughout this album. One of which being fatalism — longing, pining away, lost dreams,” Swift said of the album’s opening song. “I think that it’s a very fatalistic album in that there are lots of very dramatic lines about life or death. ‘I love you, it’s ruining my life.’ These are very hyperbolic, dramatic things to say. It’s that kind of album.”

Of “Clara Bow,” named after the silent film actress, Swift said the track is “a commentary on what I’ve seen in the industry that I’ve been in over time.”

“I used to sit in record labels trying to get a record deal when I was a little kid. And they’d say, ‘you know, you remind us of’ and then they’d name an artist, and then they’d kind of say something disparaging about her, ‘but you’re this, you’re so much better in this way or that way.’ And that’s how we teach women to see themselves, as like you could be the new replacement for this woman who’s done something great before you,” she said. “I picked women who have done great things in the past and have been these architypes of greatness in the entertainment industry. Clara Bow was the first ‘it girl.’ Stevie Nicks is an icon and an incredible example for anyone who wants to write songs and make music.”

“Florida!!!” featuring Florence + the Machine is one of the rare songs on the album that doesn’t see Swift directly speaking of a former lover. Swift said the inspiration for this track actually came from “always watching ‘Dateline.'”

“People have these crimes that they commit; where do they immediately skip town and go to? They go to Florida,” the singer added. “They try to reinvent themselves, have a new identity, blend in. I think when you go through a heartbreak, there’s a part of you that thinks, ‘I want a new name. I want a new life. I don’t want anyone to know where I’ve been or know me at all.’ And so that was the jumping off point. Where would you go to reinvent yourself and blend in? Florida!”

As for “Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me,” Swift revealed that she wrote the tune “alone, sitting at the piano in one of those moments when I felt bitter about just all the things we do to our artists as a society and as a culture.”

“There’s a lot about this particular concept on ‘The Tortured Poets Department,'” she added. “What do we do to our writers, and our artists, and our creatives? We put them through hell. We watch what they create, then we judge it. We love to watch artists in pain, often to the point where I think sometimes as a society we provoke that pain and we just watch what happens.”

Lastly, Swift broke down the metaphor within “My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys.”

The song is about “being somebody’s favorite toy until they break you and then don’t want to play with you anymore,” she said. “Which is how a lot of us are in relationships where we are so valued by a person in the beginning, and then all of the sudden, they break us or they devalue us in their mind. We’re still clinging on to ‘No no, no. You should’ve seen them the first time they saw me. They’ll come back to that. They’ll get back to that.’”

#taylor swift #ttpd

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yuurei20 · 1 year

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Twisted Wonderland, the Novel: Yuuya Apologizes

Yuuya fails to defend Ace to Riddle during the unbirthday party's chestnut tart incident, and the guilt is eating him alive.

After speaking with Chenya, the four first-year students go to Trey for answers, but Trey has nothing to say in his own defense.

“’It’s not like Housewarden Riddle could choose his parents. It's not fair, but that’s how it is. But you—from what you’ve told us, you always thought they were doing wrong by him, didn’t you?’

‘That’s…’ Trey falls silent. His lips continue to move for a moment, but even after repeated attempts he cannot bring himself to speak.

In the end he says nothing at all.

‘There wasn’t anything you could do against those adults, but when you saw him making the same mistakes as his parents, you should have told him to knock it off! Set him straight! What are you even trying to do by coddling him? You feel bad for him ‘cause he’s so pathetic? And he sure is now, becoming more and more alone because everybody hates him—and you’re just gonna watch it happen?’

‘Hey, Ace’, Deuce leans forward to interject. ’That’s going too far.’

‘And I’m right. There isn’t one person in the dorm who likes him right now.’

Deuce goes quiet. It sounds cruel, but it is not wrong. The students that Yuuya saw in the cafeteria, their classmates between classes, all the Heartslabyul students have been disparaging Riddle behind his back. They say he makes them feel suffocated, that they want to stay as far from the dorm as they can.

But Trey and Cater were different. After seeing them defend Riddle multiple times, Yuuya used to think that they were fond of him.

But after hearing Trey’s confession, Yuuya know longer knows what to think about how they must really feel.

It might not even be a matter of like or dislike anymore. There is simply no one on Riddle's side.

‘And if that’s not it, then what? Maybe you don’t even feel bad for him at all, you just keep your mouth shut ‘cause you’re scared of him taking off your head like he did to us. You’re such a loser!’

It is starting to get dark, and Ace’s eyes glisten under the light of the streetlamp overhead. Befitting of the words he spits at Trey—staring at him straight on—Ace’s stare burns with anger, seeming to overflow with strength from his heart itself.

‘You’ll play the role of the nice guy so long as people shut up and take what they’ve given, but in the end you’re just afraid. All you care about is yourself. I could never treat a childhood friend like that! You’re not his friend—you’re not anything!’

Yuuya doesn’t hear Trey’s response. He cannot hear anything at all. Trey has looked to one side, his face cast in shadow so that none of them can tell what kind of expression it is he wears.

Yuuya is first to break the silence with, ‘I’m sorry.’

‘Hah?’ Ace responds, a curious look upon his face. ‘Why are YOU apologizing, I’ve been talking about Trey-senpai.’

‘Because I get it. When everyone was blaming everything on you, I was too scared to say anything. I actually wanted to say that you were right, and take your side.’

All too well, Yuuya understands how Trey has been unable to stop Riddle.

It is terrifying to point out when bad things are being done; to do something that you know will earn you the ire of others. Yuuya has countless memories of feeling himself freeze in fear. Or maybe this is Trey not wanting to stir up trouble? Not wanting to cause a disturbance, as a form of self defense? Those are feelings with which Yuuya identifies so well, it is almost painful.

He had both envied and been in awe of Deuce, who had stood alone at Ace’s side. When he thinks about Ace’s chastisement of Trey he agrees completely, ashamed of how he ran away—pathetic.

‘I’m so sorry.’

Yuuya bows his head; he can feel his eyes grow warm. If he starts to cry, he knows he will not be able to look anyone in the eye ever again, out of embarrassment. Yuuya takes a deep breath as he fights to hold back his tears, and then suddenly a loud voice says, ‘Haah?’

‘Is that…is that the reason you were acting weird back there?’

Ace sounds so surprised that Yuuya—brimming with fear—raises his head to look. Yuuya’s eyes are red with tears, which Ace may have noticed despite the darkness, but he still responds with ‘Are you stupid!’, and begins to talk very fast.

‘’When did I ever ask you to do something like that? If I told you that you had to stand by me no matter what, if I forced you to do that, I’d be no less arrogant than the Housewarden.’

‘But…but you were in trouble. You were angry about the way everyone just stood there afraid, weren’t you?’

‘I was just telling those guys off for whispering behind people’s backs. I figure that if you have something to say, you should say it. You don’t like getting caught up in that kind of thing, right? That’s your choice to make, so don’t force yourself to stand by me. You can try and mediate or stand and watch—it’s fine to just do whatever you want to do.’ Ace glances at Trey with a wicked smile. ‘Unlike someone we know, I think you should tell me outright when you think I’m wrong, too.’

At Ace’s sudden surge of pride, Deuce bursts into laughter.

‘You’re feeling pretty good right now, aren’t you, and here you asked Yuu for backup to go apologize to the Housewarden in the first place.’

‘Yeah, like he said! You’re all actin’ cool, lookin’ down on people like you’re better!’

‘You can shut your mouths. Well, sure, you say something that pisses me off and I’ll tell you. But I won’t go pointing fingers at people or anything. I’m not some kid.’

He is so strong. Yuuya stares at the defiant Ace before him in complete disbelief. He has never met a person like this before.

At first Yuuya thought he was frightening. Then Ace got him and Grim into trouble, and he had found him troublesome. Ace is contrary, haughty, and immature, but still Yuuya sees him as wholly dependable.

This is probably because Ace does not run away when he is afraid. When faced with an obstacle he is quick and determined, and seems so cool to Yuuya. This is such an amazing trait that even Yuuya, who has always avoided getting too close to any one person around him, can see how valuable it is.

‘You’d better come up with a way to get yourself out of trouble that you don’t want to be in, Yuu. I can’t look out for you that much.’

‘Yeah…I got it. Thank you.’

When Yuuya smiles, Ace returns the look with a smirk. He seems almost relieved. Maybe he is not used to this sentimental kind of atmosphere.

Deuce also looks relieved to have Yuuya back to his usual self. Whether Grim even knows what is going on or not is unclear, but he follows up with, ‘Just don’t listen to what Ace says.’

‘Do you even know what we’ve been talking about?’

‘As if. All I know is you’re bein’ all haughty and it’s annoyin’ to have to look at.’

‘I agree he’s looking full of himself, but he isn’t wrong.’ Deuce pats Yuuya on the shoulder. ‘And Yuu, you don’t need to feel depressed about that. The only reason I was able to join Ace at all was because you’d told me that it was okay to stand against the Housewarden.’

‘Eh?’ Yuuya shakes his head fervently in surprise. ‘I’ve never said anything like that!’

‘Yeah you did—you told me that being an honor student isn’t just about putting up with things, it’s about standing up for what’s right.’

Yuuya looks at Deuce with a profoundly confused expression. It’s true—he did say that. Deuce had been so depressed after saving him from those bullies. Yuuya hadn’t wanted to watch him suffer after doing such a noble thing, and had encouraged Deuce as best he could.

But he had never considered the thought that he might have had a hand in how dazzling Deuce had been in that moment. To think that the wholly confident Deuce who can stand alone without fear had interpreted his words that way: Yuuya is so afraid, so happy, he feels like he could scream aloud.

‘So even Yuu can sound like a grown-up sometimes.’ Grim says with a grin, which turns into pleased laughter. ‘That’s my hench-human for ya. Which means you should really be feeling grateful to me, Deuce, as the boss.’

‘Not so fast there, Grim. The majority of all the trouble Yuu has ever been in was because of you.’ Deuce glances forward. ‘And the rest was because of Ace.’

‘The chandelier was your fault and you know it!’

‘That’s over and done. Don’t try to change the topic.’

Trey watches silently from the bench next to them as Deuce and Ace curse at one another. And suddenly his gaze shifts, to just behind where Yuuya stands.

‘Oooh, oooh! What a wonderful sight~’

The voice comes from directly behind Yuuya. He turns around to find himself looking directly into the face of the Headmage, dabbing at the corners of his eyes with a handkerchief.

‘Headmage!?’

#twstnovel #twst translations #twisted wonderland #Kuroki Yuuya

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tayfabe75 · 7 days

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Okay, this is probably a bit of a weird question, but do you think Matty and Taylor are in a real relationship with their current partners? If this is all a game they're playing, does that mean they're still together in secret? (Based on your theory).

If that's the case, it's just weird to me that it lasts for such a long time and they involved their friends and families for this, and moreover the families of their partners. And these are not only photos, videos, pap walks, but also visiting events and everything like that. I remember that you once said that the point of all this is to play to the last, but is their desire to prove something so huge that they are ready to sacrifice everything for it? I just... I don't know, it's like I don't quite see it. And I get that all this can be easily staged, but again, are they ready to go that far? And for what?

I’m just genuinely curious about your thoughts on this topic since you really did your research and, I’m sure, during it noticed much more than others.

Hi anon! My thoughts on what is currently going on with Taylor and Matty are controversial, to say the least. So, let me use a cut…

Ah, that's better! Before I answer, allow me to throw out a few disclaimers:

I mean no disrespect to Taylor, Matty, or anyone in their lives. I have an immeasurable amount of admiration for both of them, as artists and as people. Regardless of which direction their love lives go in, I will remain a fan. I have no entitlement, no expectation, and no ill will towards anyone they are perceived to be dating, both past and present. But I love a good story and solving a good mystery, so here I am.

That said, I do believe that Taylor and Matty are engaging in "kayfabe" which is defined as:

"the fact or convention of presenting staged performances as genuine or authentic"

I would like to clarify that it's not done as a "game". I believe they're using it for self-preservation and as a means to protect both their privacy and sanity in the face of what is a really very unfortunate consequence of their job description as confessional songwriters: celebrity (and thus, tabloid and gossip culture).

Since he was a kid, Matty has been disillusioned by his mother's fame in particular, recounting stories about how he'd see tabloids just straight-up lying about his mother for profit, saying things he knew damned well weren't true because he actually lived with her day to day. Taylor, too, has made many disparaging comments about tabloid culture, here's a quote I love:

"The reason most of the things in the media that are written about me aren't true is because none of my real friends would ever talk to the press."

Anon, also please understand that paparazzi photos are not candid, most celebrities call them to be photographed to remain a relevant topic of conversation. Social media, too, has long since turned into a curated form of self-marketing.

So, would their friends and family help them? Absolutely! Especially since for most, all it involves is just… keeping quiet. Not talking to the press. Others are likely happy to help out in performative ways, such as their parents - Denise, who dealt with all the same invasions of privacy, and Scott, who had always seemed to have a hand in controlling Taylor's public narrative.

But why would anyone pretend to be their partners? Anon… have you not noticed the opportunities just pouring into their laps? A hosting gig, various modelling gigs, an incredible amount of clout for both of them. The sheer amount of merch Taylor wears is… suspicious.

Why is it taking so long? Well...

"People often greatly underestimate how much I will inconvenience myself to prove a point."

I've said this several times now, but Taylor is a storyteller. Her favorite stories are ones with moral lessons. She's teaching one right now. And if people are following the clues in TTPD, they'll realize the album reflects an earlier time in Taylor's life.

Lastly, I believe their Love Story (or "Story of Us" if you prefer) is wrapped up in Eras and the re-releases (especially the vault tracks). TTPD is just another chapter, not the conclusion. The backstory will progress when Reputation is released (or if the stars align and we get music from Matty before that… clownin' hard for June 1st!)

So, in summation, here's what I think is happening:

1) Indulge in "kayfabe" to protect privacy and sanity at all costs 2) Develop a healthy relationship in secret, away from public scrutiny 3) Take care of those who help them along the way (opportunities) 4) Dismantle pre-established fan lore 5) Break the media's favorite toy (her love life) 6) Reset boundaries and fan entitlement/expectation 7) Make fools of the media when the time comes 8) Tell their love story on their own terms 9) Emerge as the ultimate, untouchable power couple

Trust me, I get it, I'm probably wrong and "delusional" and blah blah blah - except, I've been right a few times now by just following the storytelling techniques I see at play, so I'm gonna go ahead and keep on clownin'! Thanks for the ask! 🖤

#answered #theory: kayfabe

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mafaldaknows · 2 years

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Why the fuck you all have to constantly deny the chemistry between Timmy and Russell even if you haven't seen the movie? Why the fuck do you have to stand here every day to putting down a work that two actors who admire each other have done when out of here so many people who have seen the film are praising them and how they are together? What's your problem? In what world do you think Timmy can only have one person that he worked well with and everything else sucks or doesn't deserve praise? Can you go beyond the ship for a fucking second and be objective? Just for once? You all are acting pathetic.

Hello, Anon:

I know that I say this a lot, but are you lost, Darling? You seem to have mistaken me for someone who:

Cares what you think

Publicly expressed the opinion that Timothée Chalamet and Taylor Russell lack chemistry when I haven’t even seen the movie yet

Contrary to what you might believe about me, I don’t automatically assume anything about anything. I do my level best to consider the facts in front of me before I form an objective opinion. While I might enjoy hypothesizing along with my fellow shippers for fun, because that’s still a thing that I enjoy, I also still stand by the assertion that “I know nothing, Oliver”, and therefore prefer not to speak in all-or-nothing absolutes, even within the sacred spaces of the Charmiesphere.

I have not publicly disparaged anything about Bones and All (2022) except to ponder why Timmy’s pants were hemmed about an inch too short at the London premiere, because that’s really the only thing I can comment on with any kind of authority, as a professional costumer/seamstress/dresser/stylist. I will give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that you might’ve mistaken me for someone else within this fandom.

I’ve traveled to a new city every week for the last few weeks now, and have had little time to keep track of everything that’s going on. I’m out living my best life, and so should you, Anon. Life is far too short to spend fretting over other people’s opinions about things that should be of no interest to you.

FWIW, I arrived in NYC this Tuesday in time to stand in line for standby tickets for Bones and All (2022) at Lincoln Center but instead chose to take a postprandial stroll through Central Park West with my beloved, to people-watch and enjoy the sunset, in the greatest city in the world. Because life is short, the sunset was spectacular, and we’ll never experience that beautiful moment together ever again.

📸: @mafaldaknows

After an inexplicably out-of-place gondola, complete with fully-outfitted gondolier, appeared out of nowhere on the lake, we stumbled upon some random guy who rolled up his Adidas track pants to fish for change in the fountain.

The signs of my favorite ship are always there, even when I’m not looking for them. The Universe winks. And has a sense of humor, too.

📸: @mafaldaknows

I’m not entirely sure why other people’s objectivity regarding the chemistry between these two obviously talented costars should matter so much to you. Why insist on this absolute validation from someone you don’t even like?

Isn’t it enough to know that you yourself enjoy them together, in what I assume is yet another impeccable movie by the inordinately masterful and talented Luca Guadagnino? You can enjoy whatever you enjoy without anyone else’s approval, which I shouldn’t even have to say to you, especially if you’re a grown adult.

While this answer probably does not address your rant questions, I’m not entirely sure why you think that I’m somehow obligated to do so in the first place, in this space, the content of which is wholly controlled by me, and only me. If you do not enjoy the content that I provide in this space, I invite you to kindly please block me so that you are guaranteed never to see anything I post ever again.

Thanks for your comments. 🗺🙃🤷🏻‍♀️🎪🤹‍♀️

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sshbpodcast · 9 months

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Top Five Star Trek VOY Episodes

by Ames

We made it back to the Alpha Quadrant, y’all, and it was a pretty good trip! Overall, we’d say Star Trek: Voyager is a pretty decent contender for one of the best series in the franchise. Sure, we here at A Star to Steer Her By are probably still on Team DS9 for the most part, but our plucky friends lost in the Delta Quadrant are at least giving TOS and TNG a run for their money in terms of overall episode quality, character development, and consistency. Hell, TNG’s first season alone brings its average way down, so it might be a pretty close race!

Considering Voyager usually gets overlooked on a good day and unfairly criticized on a bad day, it’s a damn good show with a lot of stunning episodes that leave the audience invested, affected, and ready for more. And now that we’re out of episodes, we’ve assembled our favorites of the series for you to warp through below, and/or listen to on our finale episode of the podcast (series discussion at 1:29:20) which features even more picks from guest star Liz. Bon voyage, Voyager!

[images © CBS/Paramount]

“False Profits”: Chris We’d be remiss if we didn’t include some of the fluffy comedy shit Chris loves (I’m just as shocked as you are that it’s not Bride of Chaotica!), so here’s a very funny yet very Star Trek example that brings back the two Ferengi all the way from TNG’s “The Price.” It’s a pretty deep cut for a reference, but they certainly run with it in an ultimately satisfying way, complete with putting Ethan Phillips back in Ferengi makeup, as we saw in TNG’s “Ménage à Troi” and will see again in Enterprise’s “Acquisition.”

“Course: Oblivion”: Ames Just for the whiplash of it all, let’s pivot from a fun romp of an episode to a deeply depressing, tragic episode in “Course: Oblivion.�� The inevitable demise of all the Silver Blood Duplicates is like watching a slow-motion car crash: you know what’s going to happen is going to be upsetting but you can’t tear your eyes away. And the nihilist cherry on top of this ice cream cone of sadness is that their message never even gets through! It’s so successful at being so bleak!

“Memorial”: Caitlin Let’s kick off a handful of noteworthy episodes that examine how we connect with and remember history, starting with a space genocide that plays out in the memories of anyone who happens along as both a memorial to its people and a not-so-subtle disparagement of Holocaust deniers. The post-traumatic stress disorder that the crew displays is also expertly done, making their reactions to atrocity something personal and all the more intriguing, like “The Inner Light” on a whole ship’s scale.

“Remember”: Caitlin Before getting saddled with Paris, B’Elanna Torres had some really good character work early on, and her living out the moments in the life of an Enaran woman in her dreams gives Roxann Dawson quite a lot to play with. We also did a lot of comparing this episode to the classic “The Inner Light,” and for good reason! Dawson really shines in this role, and we also get a spellbinding portrayal of the really troubling Enaran culture and their genocide of the Regressives.

“Blink of an Eye”: Jake One of the cleverest episodes of Voyager comes in this fast-paced planet that develops quicker than you can ascertain, and thus allows for us to view the full evolution of a culture’s advancements in perfect little vignettes. And it all culminates with a hopeful and touching moment with one of Jake’s favorite characters, Gotana-Retz, finally connecting with the ship that has shaped his planet’s history and saving their asses.

“Distant Origin”: Ames Here’s another episode that’s almost too clever for its own good. The Galileo allegory is so strong and fascinating that we entirely accept that some sapient dinosaurs left earth at some point, which should be so silly as to utterly distract from the episode, but Forra Gegen is just so earnest and his plight to open the eyes of his people to their forgotten history so reasonable that we just go with it! Plus Chakotay is probably the most in character he ever gets to be all series long and it’s great to watch!

“Death Wish”: Chris While Q is at his best when paired with Jean-Luc, and his other appearances in Voyager may stretch credulity a little bit, this episode shows us a side of the Continuum that is refreshing and new. Quinn’s depiction of life as a Q as a prison is rather fascinating, and he expertly plays a compassionate character whom you root for even though you feel conflicted by it because his winning the trial will result in his death. But that’s the kind of moral conflict that Star Trek plays so well!

“Nothing Human”: Caitlin Speaking of moral conflicts, we’ve got another ethical debate on our hands in this allegory to Nazi medical experiments. While everyone here on the podcast was firmly in the camp that it is okay to use medical knowledge obtained through deplorable means, it’s still a fascinating reminder to see the full context of what it means to use data from someone like the Cardassian Josef Mengele. The science fiction lens of this real-world allegory is just what Star Trek is for.

“Relativity”: Ames I have such a soft spot for this episode. I’m a sucker for a really interesting use of time travel in storytelling, and the way this episode is structured: chef’s kiss. The twist that it was a crazed future Braxton the whole time. Yes. The weirdly sexy dynamic between Seven and Ducane. I’m there for it. And the best thing of all is seeing Jeri Ryan in a Starfleet uniform, looking fly as hell! Her character journey is now complete because someone finally dressed her well.

“Eye of the Needle”: Jake Another very soft spot of ours is in this season-one episode featuring another of Jake’s favorite Voyager characters. This is the first time (of many) that the Voyager comes this close to finding a way back home to the Alpha Quadrant only to have those hopes dashed to bits by circumstance. It’s so Voyager-specific a story that it’s actually quite perfect. So many episodes could be TNG in Voyager clothes, but it’s episodes like this one that really gave a particular voice to the show.

“Homestead”: Caitlin The literal journey the Voyager characters go on is a big part of the whole series (even when they dipsy doodle around on sidequests so often), and the most complete and meaningful character journey is Neelix’s. Throughout the show, we’ve seen him grow as he got further and further from his homeworld, became an important fixture on the ship, and developed friendships with the other characters (like Tuvok, as you’ll see in a moment). So the closure his character gets in “Homestead” is too perfect for words.

“Riddles”: Caitlin, Chris The Neelix-Tuvok relationship is on full display here. Where normally they’re paired together for the comedy of an odd-couple dynamic, this episode really shows the love these two have for each other. And Tim Russ acts his butt off as a Tuvok who is struggling to recuperate from a serious injury, trying to find himself again, and being supported by his best friend. It’s so good that it didn’t even make Caitlin’s tops list of that season, but has reemerged in the finals!

“Jetrel”: Chris, Jake One more Neelix episode to round out his character, and this is one of the early ones. We’ve already talked about some good allegories on this list for Galileo and Mengele, and appropriately for this moment, we’ve got another great scifi lens to view Robert Oppenheimer (almost said Barbie, but alas). Jetrel is a fascinating character just like Oppie, but Neelix really steals the show with the remorse he feels for draft dodging and then surviving an atrocity that would have killed him. Damn, those are some deep layers for a usually fun character.

“Year of Hell”: Ames, Jake This may be one of the best two-parters in Star Trek, as it never lost momentum and its conclusion was that jaw-dropping kind of satisfying that marks really good writing. Watching the ship and crew getting more and more wounded over the course of the two-parter was excellent to see, and the character Annorax is one of our favorite Voyager villains. And for good reason! Kirkwood Smith infuses that character with such humanity and resolve you almost root for him. Almost.

“Living Witness”: Ames, Chris, Jake Finally, the episode with the most votes from your SSHB hosts is yet another original way of looking at how people represent history, and how so much of it is told through the biased lens of whoever’s in charge. But the best thing about “Living Witness” is how much the actors get to really ham it up by portraying evil versions of their usual characters. It’s like doing a mirror universe episode, but more thought provoking, less contrived, and less doofy.

—

See also: our Bottom Five Star Trek VOY Episodes list. And why not: here’re all the seasonal tops and bottoms from seasons 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 7!

Welcome back to Earth! We hope you had as great a time following along with Janeway and crew throughout the series, but we’ve got more Star Trek on the way! Next on the docket is the one you’ve no doubt been waiting for, so make sure you’re following along here as we finally fill out the classic Trek roster with Star Trek: Enterprise in our watchthrough on SoundCloud or wherever you get your podcasts. You can also hail us on Facebook and Twitter, and give one final toast: To the Journey!

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petalsmooth · 2 years

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And it’s a two way street.

Jughead loves her.

It’s difficult for him you understand. He didn’t quite understand Tabitha when he met her. When he asked her why she was so kind to him...he isn’t used to being loved like this.

Jughead’s experiences with love have not been healthy. His father probably comes the closest to the purest love he ever had but Skeet’s exit sort of de-evolved their evolution as father and son. As for a time, FP was willing to turn his entire life around to be there for his son. The son who stayed with him. The one who didn’t give up on him when lying in an alcoholic stupor. For a short while Jughead had ONE healthy loving relationship with a flawed man who loved him and (belatedly) put him first by finding gainful employment, drying out, and encouraging his son’s dreams.

Outside of that year...we’re given to understand his relationship with his father is strained again.

RAS and co. can present this friend group as they please but we all know those “friends” turned their back on him and betrayed him. The woman he planned on sharing a life with betrayed him. His mother betrayed him. His sister? She wanted him in her life but her means of keeping him there was toxic to herself and her family. Outside of Pops, everyone in his life who claims to care about him lies to him. Uses him. Hurts him. Disparages him. Or abandons him. And in Pops case...look. He cares about Jughead and always has but he was NOT family. He owned a diner but the relationship only went so far. Now that he’s dating Tabitha I’m sure it’s evolved but...

Tabitha is different. Not only in his personal experience but just observation to those around him. His relationships aren’t the only ones that have been toxic. Maybe the only non toxic one he ever saw was Fred and Mary and they still broke up because wanted different things. Tabitha’s a completely foreign element to his life and is it any wonder narrator Jughead has anointed her a literal Angel? Compared to his experience with anyone else? She is.

Jughead has a lifetime of trauma and repression. He has learned to guard himself, to put walls up. He is careful with heart because he doesn’t have the ability to hold back. When he loves, he loves unconditionally, unselfishly and if he gives that gift to the wrong person...they have the power to do irrevocable harm. We’ve seen the damage done by Betty and his mother. His father and sister. Archie.

I really don’t believe he ever thought he would love someone again. I definitely don’t think he thought someone would or could love him. If in passing he ever considered the possibility, it probably resembled the distorted negative influences he experienced before. He has nothing to compare Tabitha to and I could see it being frightening and a bit like almost too good to be true.

Yet he does love Tabi. You can feel it and you can see it. Even without saying it, it’s there. She is the only person he completely and truly trusts. That means a great deal for someone like Jughead who has had his trust betrayed repeatedly. He TRUSTS her to do right by him and by others. To consider their feelings and well being and not just her own. She doesn’t do it for affirmation, or financial gain. She simply wishes to help. Tabi has a servant’s heart and it mirrors his own actually...just without the hard earned cynicism.

I actually think that’s one of the qualities he loves most about her. Her outlook on life. She sees the world for what it is but doesn’t let it break her or change her. She is determined to make life better. In some respects I think he’s awed by her. Perhaps even inspired? I very much think Narrator Jughead isn’t the only one to see her as the living embodiment of an Angel, you saw it in how he looked at her when Pop’s burned down and she admitted not having insurance. His world is brighter when she is in it. He’s happier when she is there, he feels safe with her and loved. He no longer feels alone.

I could go on and on about the two of them and didn’t even delve into the mutual attraction/passion that is there but that is what some in the fandom don’t understand. It’s there, it’s been shown. The breathlessness when kissing, the knowing looks cast at each other as they see their effect and feel a racing heart. The way how they feel has them acting like teenagers giggling, stealing a flower from a restaurant vase or sneaking out of a “date” with her parents. The need for even the most casual of a touch. It’s just their passion is expressed through more than a touch or kiss. It’s in their unshakeable devotion to each other.

They care for each other. In every encouraging word, in every ear they lend to hear what each have to say. In a simple text asking her to hurry home from a business trip because he needs her and loves her. How he seeks her out when the voices are crashing thunderously in his head. How she collapses in his arms in grief because she learned he is fated to die and she cannot stop it. How she does a very un-Tabitha thing and takes a single selfish action to bring him back to her so she can have a few more days with him. THIS is passion and a pity if anyone is so conditioned to the ephemeral expression of love that they miss the kind of passion that sets a relationship apart from transitory to lasting.

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justfandomwritings · 2 years

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Hello! I just wanted to tell you that your writing is fantastic. I love your Hangman short series about Addie. It is incredibly well-written. You have serious talent. I aspire to be a writer in the future, and when I read your stories I genuinely feel all the emotions those characters feel, and hope someday I can write as well as you do. I just wanted to tell you because I’ve reread the Hangman stories multiple times and cannot get enough of it.

Hi friend! I considered writing an effusive thank you about how much it meant to me that you read my stories and liked them, and how much I appreciated your comments and that I could provide Jake and Addie’s story for you... And I will. Because this is amazingly sweet of you to say. Fanfic writers put time and effort into stories that are so often under appreciated (I am very fortunate to have amazing readers like yourself who remind me that someone out there is reading and enjoying what I have to write and I could never be more grateful to you and everyone else for it!) so it's always wonderful to see that readers like your fics! Especially when the character's emotions hit home. That is my end goal of every fic. It's why I so often end up writing angst. I want readers to feel something and connect with the characters in the story, so this was just affirmation that I've done that! And I love you for it!

I also want to talk to you about what you said about wanting to write like me.

Writing is all about starting. (Go watch that scene from Set It Up. Nothing has ever been more accurate). You don’t have to aspire to write or hope to write like me. I promise you all of my writing is absolute shit when I first put it to paper. You are absolutely capable right now of putting something to paper that is as good as the first draft of the Only Thing if not better. I don’t know what your talent level is, but it doesn’t have to be high to beat that.

You can tell exactly how much time I put into a piece based on how not-shit it is. They are all equally bad when put to paper the first time. And that is not me being disparaging of myself or putting myself down because I do think I am good. I’m just not any better writer than anyone else. What I am is a better editor.

I don’t write a good first draft. I, to quote Set It Up, go back and make it better. And make it better. And make it better. Until it’s either good enough to publish or until I am done rereading it and say fuck it and publish it anyway or abandon it.

Your first drafts are your first drafts. They’re good, or they’re not, and that’s ok either way. And sure, as you gain experience those first drafts do get better, but your standards also get higher. So really, your first drafts will always seem bad to you. But it doesn’t matter if you think they’re good because no one is going to read your first draft. If you’re judging your writing based on all the words you put on paper, you’re doing it wrong. Write something down then improve it. Then judge yourself on the improved version and improve on that. Then judge yourself on that version and improve. Again and again until you look at it and go “I’m proud of this.”

The minute you’re proud of it is the minute it’s done. As you get better, that standard will get higher, and that’s a good thing because that will push you to become better. At any given time, at any given experience level, if you are proud of what you’ve got on paper, than it is a good story.

But don’t not write or say you only want to write like someone else just because you think someone else writes well. I promise you most of us don’t. We just put the time into it to make it seem like we do. We write and read and reread. We get betas to reread when our eyes get tired of the words. We set fics aside and come back later. Writing is such a small part of the process. Every time you reread a story, every time you change a word, you make it better because more thought went into that word than the one it’s replacing.

So, to paraphrase set it up, go write something that is absolute shit. Then make it better and better. And when you don’t think you can make it better on your own anymore, come find me. And we’ll read it together. Until you’re proud of it. And then when you’re proud of it, you can post it.

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queenofmalkier · 2 years

Text

The Ongoing Egwene Exploration part 2

I pulled the time to do this out of a hat because I was enjoying the adventure and also wanted to read the whole book in one sitting and it was ruining my week.

Part 1 can be found here.

Let’s do this!

While this chapter picks up directly where the last ended, it felt like enough of an “end scene” sort of moment to separate this encounter into an individual observation post. We’ve officially been introduced to Thom, and with this introduction we get to see a bit more about Egwene and how she reacts to others.

She starts off excited - they all are! It’s been a hard winter and a gleeman is sort of the indie-band-entertainment-of-the-year in their village. I like that we have this pocket of a moment, which ends all too quickly, because it shows despite everything else that Egwene is still young. She’s excited about Bel Tine, about the fireworks and dancing around the maypole. Oh Egwene.

But she isn’t excited for long, not once Thom gets going. He immediately jumps into a tirade, inadvertently insulting Egwene’s father, the neighboring villages that might one day be her people if she becomes a Wisdom, and, worst of all, Nynaeve. Because yes, Thom The Silverest Tongue To Ever Silver is guilty of foot-in-mouth syndrome on occasion.

I’m not sure if I find that encouraging or not, given my own penchant for saying the wrong thing at the wrong time.

Honestly, I very much would have been more than a touch annoyed with him myself. Egwene’s feelings are absolutely justified. Given that she at least knows Fain, that’s more or less the last straw - she’s many things, but cowardly has never been one of them. She’s not going to stand there and listen to Thom disparage anyone else without making it clear she’s not a receptive audience. (In addition to being brave, she’s also very loyal when she can afford to be.)

Good for her.

This next bit feels a bit fumbled. Thom is obviously trying to smooth any ruffled feathers, the boys snicker a bit, but it’s not really clear why. Are they waiting for Egwene to lay into Thom? Or do they think that his flattery is absurd? It remains a bit murky, though I gather we’re supposed to understand that the boys are laughing at the idea of Egwene being pretty and she’s mad about that.

Whatever the case, Egwene is offended and politely accepts the offer.

The conversation moves on but we get another flash of insight - unlike the boys, Egwene is not superstitious. Perhaps because of her mentor, Nynaeve, but perhaps she was always a bit skeptical? It makes me wonder what sort of little adventures she’s gone on, given what the boys have admitted to. Has she tested the strength of her own resolve just yet? Or is she building up to it?

It does embarrass her though, either because she was suppose to mind her tongue about whatever Nynaeve told her or because she knows her dismissiveness would be frowned on in their village. Censure is a powerful tool.

Again, Egwene displays an innate ability to read people and to understand their motivations - she knows Thom is being a dick, but she also feels guilty about calling it out because clearly the three boys haven’t clocked it yet.

More flashes of delight, the mood shifts so quickly. I sort of forgot that. They are all just so bloody young :( Now I’m sad again. She might be playing at being a Wisdom for now, at being an adult with a braid and everything, but Egwene still has her favorite stories, and Rand knows these aren’t those kinds of stories. Another subtle manipulation tactic, perhaps? Rand does think she’s done it intentionally to rattle him, perhaps in retribution for not agreeing she was the prettiest girl in the village. We can’t really say.

We’ve learned she favors comedies though, and, rather on the nose for Egwene “stories about women outwitting people who were supposed to be smarter than everyone else” - can you see my surprised face?

We end this encounter with Egwene on an interesting note - torn between Rand and Nynaeve, who represents a different path, a different future. That something more that Egwene wants in her life.

Egwene follows Nynaeve.

#Wheel of Time #wheel of time book spoilers #egwene al'vere #The Egwene Exploration

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straight-to-the-pain · 2 years

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Identity - any profession applies. Medical community? Doctors? Lawyers? Teachers? All part of identity. Is it wrong to call out all doctors as frauds when there are many cases of medical malpractice? Or to call out all teachers as terrible at teaching properly and contributing to the marginalization and lack of self worth of kids? You don't get to pick and choose that identity in one case is different from identity in another. You label based on identity and you cause hurt.

I don't think the problem is your views on military or government, which I don't think anyone has disagreed with you. I think it's the labelling, which is a hurtful thing even if it's joking. No part of labeling based on any facet of identity is the right thing to do, and it's clear that there are good and bad aspects to any organization or group. I don't think it's right to create that kind of atmosphere in a community like ours or encourage others to joke about it.

I’m genuinely confused as to what you’re referring to when I say that I labelled people a certain way, and I think the fact that you see me disparaging the military as me attacking people who are in it just exemplifies the issue. I have friends who are and have been in the military and I care about them and support them and am often actually angry at the military for the way that they’ve been treated because they deserve better.

I agree that your career is going to make up your general sense of identity but at the same time, it shouldn’t become inseparable from you. As a nursing student, at the highest levels I’m technically working under the government, but I can dislike the government, openly, protest and join a union (which I have done). People in the military don’t get to do all that.

While I care deeply about the nhs I am still able to see the flaws and the issues in our system, and I can call out the lack of funding, the stagnant salaries and the surface level appreciation that never actually improves anything for us or our patients. The difference is that the nhs is a system designed to help people, and the army is designed to kill (because even in defence, the aim is still violent).

Lastly, criticising a system does not mean that I am criticising all the people who work within it. I disagree with for profit healthcare on moral grounds because I believe that healthcare is a human right which should be free for all, but that doesn’t mean that I am attacking everyone who works in a private hospital. I get it, sometimes you need the money. And I get why people join the military too, and I wish that people didn’t have to feel that judgement of their organisation is an inherent judgement of them, because it’s not.

#asks answered #politics tw #I swear I’ll get back to your regularly scheduled whump posting shortly #also you can’t complain about other asks I receive like I just post them you don’t have to like them #genuinely tho this has been enlightening #sorry I haven’t had time to browse for good whump #I’ve been on placement but I’m done now #politics

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wheelsup · 3 years

Text

kissing lessons

summary: one of your classic movie nights with spencer turns into a learning opportunity

A/N: this is really fluffy, but the whole story centers around kissing. use your own judgement! i’d say it’s at worst 16+

category: spencer reid x gn!reader, fluff (with a bit of spice) best friends to lovers (sorta)

warnings: just kissing, a brief implication at the end

word count: 3k

Occasionally, the team will spend an extra night in their hotel before heading home from a case. Be it due to poor weather conditions, or the fact that your case wrapped in the dead of night, the reasons for flying don’t ever matter. Because the majority of the times when you have to stay that extra night, you and Spencer have sleepovers.

The routine is pretty much the same. You’ll stock up on gas station snacks – sour peach rings for Spencer, salted microwave popcorn for you – and reconvene in one of your hotel rooms. Preferably, whichever of you got the better deal that week – a bigger tv, a room further away from the ice machine. And you’d rent the cheapest movie available on-demand, the options spanning from low-budget sci-fi to poorly written rom-coms. That night, the viewing fell under the latter category.

Spencer perched at the foot of your bed with both feet tucked under his legs, criss-cross style, while you laid against the headboard to watch. Every now and then, you tossed out your commentary and he’d ignore it. He always says you’re too critical of movies and you’re of the belief that he’s too forgiving.

“I don’t think they should end up together,” you mumbled, words slurring around your mouthful of popcorn. You pulled a face right as the movie approached the romantic climax, after spending the past ninety minutes actively rooting against the couple. Spencer ignored you, pretending to be engrossed in the movie to spite your disparagement of it. “They both suck.”

You groaned, slumped further against the pillows, and shoved your sock-clad toes under Spencer’s left thigh in a call for attention. He jumped at the intrusion, but ultimately, your efforts were futile.

And then the big kiss commenced, and your booing finally piqued his interest. “Gross! I feel bad for people who kiss like that.”

A small bell went off in his head and he took a curious glance at you over his shoulder.

“What do you mean?” he asked. He stopped chewing and the piece of candy in his mouth pushed out his cheek, giving him an adorably innocent look. His brows scrunched in the middle and his nose had a tiny crinkle in it, utterly confused.

You scoffed and matched his expression. “Are you serious?” You jerked your head in the direction of the television and Spencer whipped his head back, squinting. He couldn’t figure out what you were pointing out, what it was that was so obviously wrong to you. “Spencer, he’s swallowing her chin!”

Oh. He hadn’t noticed.

Feeling dumb, he muttered, “I thought that’s how you’re supposed to kiss…” It wasn’t the deepest confession to admit to you that he lacked some knowledge when it came to kissing, but he still refused to look at you as he said it.

“Spencer, please tell me you haven’t been kissing people like that.” You narrowed your eyes at the back of his head, sitting up straighter in bed. He shrugged and lowered his head, focusing on his snack as his fingers dug into the packet of gummy rings in his lap.

He popped another piece into his mouth, pretending to be occupied with eating so as to avoid your prying. “I dunno.”

It didn’t occur to you until that moment that Spencer might have learned everything he knows about kissing – among other things – solely through watching movies. How else could he look at that and think it’s normal? And you’re left wondering if he’s ever even practiced it with another living human. He clearly didn’t want to talk about it, but unfortunately, that only heightened your interest. You had to know.

“Have you ever kissed anyone before?” You kept your voice low, your tone implying that you were ready to exchange this secret with him. You wouldn’t judge him if he admitted he hadn’t.

He scoffed loudly, and though you couldn’t see his face, you’re positive he rolled his eyes too. “Yeah, of course.” Then quietly, he added on, “But it was only like… for four seconds.”

You nodded thoughtfully, considering how this new piece of information adjusted your existing view of Spencer. For some reason, you couldn’t tell if you actually expected him to be experienced or not.

He didn’t exactly scream that he’d… gotten around, for lack of better words, but you’re still surprised to learn that he’s barely done it at all. You supposed he was objectively cute, that maybe you could see it if he weren’t your best friend. And yeah, he’s a little awkward, but he’s smart and kind, so he has three great things going for him, and you’re surprised more people haven’t swooped him up yet.

Your lips curled down in thought, brows raised in curiosity. “And was it good?” It was a genuine enough question, because you’ve never really thought about Spencer Reid and kissing in the same sentence before. As it turned out, there was a lot of missing information relating to those two things.

“I don’t know! I didn’t get, like, a feedback form,” he grunted, angling his shoulder even further away from you. If you could’ve seen him, you’d notice his face boiling and turning red with heat. All this inquiring made him think harder about his … talents … than he’s ever had to before, and he’s not a fan.

You were prepared to do some more digging when the slump in his back made you feel a tinge of guilt. It was your fault he looked so defeated. You pressed too hard, disregarding his boundaries just because you wanted to know more. And now, he was wondering if there was something wrong with him, because you wouldn’t leave it alone.

He barely noticed as you swung your feet from under his thigh and rocked onto your knees, leaning forward to nudge his shoulder with your palm. It hauled his attention out of his thoughts and back into the room. You wanted to apologize, but instead you settled with “I’m sure you’re fine, Spence.”

He nodded unconvincingly. By the glow of the screen, you could see he was still gnawing on the inside of his cheek, focusing his eyes as he played with a loose hangnail on one of his fingers. It made you feel even worse. “Are you actually worried about it?” you asked, laden with concern.

“What if I am bad at it?” He whispered, like saying it too loud would make it true. “And that’s why it’s only happened once?”

A large exhale puffed out of your nose as you weighed your options.

You could go back to your original plan and apologize for setting him down this path of doubt. But that wouldn’t do anything to stop him from worrying, anyway. You could tell him there’s no correlation between the way he kisses and how frequently it’s happened; that you’re sure the reason isn’t because he’s bad. But you don’t know that for sure.

So, fuck it, you thought, grabbing a fistful of his pajama shirt and tugging him closer to you roughly, pressing your lips onto his.

This way, you’d at least have an informed opinion to be able to tell him if he was good or bad.

His lips were softer than you expected – not that you’d thought about them often, they’re just impossibly softer than they look – and invitingly warm. But they were completely stiff.

You could tell he was trying to kiss you back by the way his mouth ferociously moved over yours. He was trying to be a passionate, engaged partner, but he forgot about the aspect of tenderness.

His lips felt like two solid objects just sliding around on your face. They didn’t move in any sort of accordance with yours. There was no push and pull, your lips didn’t mesh perfectly together to form a solitary unit as they moved in unison.

It felt more like his lips were your opponent, putting up an attack and defense play against the actions of your own.

You pulled away, resisting a giggle at his bewildered face. “You’re not so terrible,” you swipe the corner of your mouth, smudged with Spencer’s flavored chapstick, “But it could use some work.”

He was at a loss for words, mouth gaping open as his eyes darted around the room and all over you. Maybe he’d find an explanation for what just happened carved into the walls somewhere or written across your forehead.

What happened was that you kissed him. And he was a little bit bad. Simple as that.

“I-I wasn’t ready!” he stammered, chucking up his hands defensively. He’d process the fact that he’d just made out with his best friend at a later time, right now the bigger concern was the slight cringed look on your face. He sulked and folded his arms.“What was so bad about it?”

“Well,” you scratched the back of your ear, trying to gauge if he’d react well to getting some advice, “my first tip would be to relax your lips.”

“Okay, I can do that.”

“And don’t think too hard. You should react to what’s happening in the moment, not worrying about what your next move is gonna be.” You could see the gears turning in his head as he tried to envision what that would play out like in a real situation. “You wanna try again?” you offered, figuring he’d learn much faster if he was more hands-on about it.

He nodded, and you leaned in close, waiting for him to go for it. His heart quickened under the pressure of performance, eyes screwing shut as he closed the gap. His mouth smashed into yours as he dove in hard. It was toeing on the side of too harsh, but you let that one slide in hopes it was just a byproduct of his nerves.

You had to tap his knee to remind him to relax, and he loosened some of the tension he had in his lips. He slotted his between yours, allowing them to be pliable to your movements and remembering to react, not plan.

He moved his mouth leisurely against yours, trying to match your pressure and pacing. They actually started moving in time with yours at some point. The kiss took on a shape of its own as he started getting out of his head, letting himself enjoy the kiss for what it was in that exact moment.

It was already better than before. Leaps and bounds better. But then he tried to deepen it, building on its intensity but adding more… something into it. You couldn’t even tell what it was he was trying to do.

“Okay, second tip…” you inhaled sharply, pushing him off of you with a palm against his chest. Whatever it was, it needed to stop. “You kinda do this thing like… where you’re blowing air into my mouth?” You scrunched your nose, punctuating your dislike. “That feels weird. Don’t do that. If anything, do the opposite.”

“I’m supposed to suck the air out of your mouth?” His face contorted, voice already slightly exasperated. He barely understood what the air thing was that you claimed he did. He didn’t realize in the process of trying to add pressure to the kiss, he was just forcibly blowing against your mouth.

“Not literally, no.” You laughed a little, rubbing your palm in a comforting pattern on his chest.”But you can use your lips to suck on mine, or my tongue… just nothing involving the exchange of breath. We’re not in CPR training.”

He eased up a little with your joke, adjusting to your advice he gave it another try. After a few moments, he latched onto your bottom lip with his own, sucking it softly into his mouth. “Yeah, like that,” you mumbled against him, voice pitching high in encouragement. He sucked on it with a little more greed, holding it for a second, then eased up, varying the pressure of his movements just like you did before.

You made a mental note to praise him for that at a later time, deciding to instead part your lips to see if he’d venture into further experimentation.

He caught on quickly. He parted them further, prodding his tongue against them as you opened to allow him entry. Just as you started to really enjoy it, he ran his tongue over the inside of your mouth, moving it fast and roughly like he was a washing machine.

“Stop,” you grimaced, tearing away quickly. You had to swipe your hand over your mouth to get rid of the excess saliva that really shouldn’t have been an issue in the first place, given how brief the frenching was. “Your tongue is way too aggressive.”

Overwhelmed, he tilted his head to the ceiling and let out a frustrated grunt, slapping his hands down to the top of his thighs.

There were too many factors to worry about. He had no idea how you looked at him with a straight face and told him not to think too much when there were a million things he needed to remember all at once; he needed to vary his moves to keep it interesting, but make sure he’s not ruining the flow by changing things up too much, and to be gentle but not timid.

All of this was second nature to you, but it was brand new to Spencer. Could you really blame him for not getting the hang of it right away? You decided to stop your list of critiques short for this round to spare him. He’d get there eventually, but not if he felt discouraged too soon.

“I don’t see why people like it in the first place,” he huffed, his head returning to it’s normal posture. In Spencer’s eyes, there truly wasn’t any appeal to kissing with tongue; it looked sloppy and unnecessary, and as you’d just confirmed, it actually was.

You thought about his statement for a second. There’s a certain allure to it, and you didn’t know how to describe it to him. So instead you cupped his cheeks in both your palms and slid your mouth over his again. As his jaw slacked its tension, you slowly pushed your tongue past his lips and gently pressed it against his own before swirling them together.

You sighed softly into his mouth, running your fingers through his hair and tugging carefully at the ends. He made a small noise against you, something like a whimper, and you swallowed the vibrations of it. As you retreated, you captured his bottom lip between your teeth and gave it a light, teasing tug. You soothed it again with your lips before releasing it, a proud giggle forming in your chest as Spencer chased after your lips as you broke apart.

“That’s why.” You smirked at the dazed look on his face. His eyelids remained closed longer than necessary, still feeling the ghost of your mouth on his and a tingle where your fingers were in his hair.

“Oh.” His voice came out meek as he slowly came back to reality, brows wrinkling up his forehead as he opened his eyes.

He put both his palms down on the mattress, one laying flat on either side of you, and dove forward to resume the kiss right where you left it. A surprised squeak left you as his mouth collided with yours with an insatiable hunger. You brought one hand back to his hair, and he was a goner.

He unfolded his legs from under himself and shuffled onto his knees, following his hands until he practically crawled into your lap. Each of his legs hooked onto either side of your thighs as he hovered over your lap, leaning his body entirely into yours.

The physics of it didn’t hold up; he’s taller than you are, and his chest was too heavy for you to carry. The balance was off center and it sent you tumbling back onto the mattress, bringing him down with you until his chest laid on yours.

It was the perfect force – the weight of him on top of you. He tasted like peach candy and sour sugar, and you found yourself craving more of it.

You shuffled higher up the mattress, giving him space to stretch out his body as he followed yours. One of his hands found your waist, gripping tightly, while he placed the other on the mattress beside your head, using it to steady himself. Sliding your legs out from under him, you wrapped them on the outside of his hips, using them to pull him closer down to you.

It only broke off in moments when both of you absolutely needed to get air, gasping as you pulled apart for brief reprieve before colliding again. He followed every word of your advice, getting better with each passing second until he exceeded expectations by leaps and bounds.

Your fingers weaved through his hair, passionately tugging the wavy strands to angle him against you and igniting his nerves under your touch. A soft moan leaves him and you’re encouraged to tighten your grip on them. His hips bucked reactively at the sensation, and he quickly pulled back, a slight embarrassment creeping up his cheeks. He got too carried away.

You took in his flushed face and swollen, kiss-bruised lips. They’d turned a shade of red brighter than you’ve ever seen them, and it was all you could do not to dive for them again as his tongue sweeped over them, soothing the burning heat you’d left on them.

Before he could apologize for his eagerness, you nudged your nose against his, your smile skimming against his lips. “So what else don’t you know how to do?”

☆

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#spencer reid x gn!reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fic #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid fanfic #criminal minds fic #criminal minds fluff #spencer reid #mgg #matthew gray gubler #criminal minds imagine #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid self insert #spencer reid smut

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darkpurpledawn · 3 years

Text

Fanfic recs for the first quarter of 2021!

It’s been a long time since I made a fic rec post, and we’re diving back in with a big list of fics from the first quarter! Even long after the publication of the book and coming up on two years out from the release of the show, this fandom is still a neverending gold mine of fics. Here are some I’ve enjoyed that were completed from January through March 2021!

cafe au vin by @mortifyingideal Rated G

One Valentine’s Day Fic To Rule Them All...I’m not going to say more because this one is such a delightful surprise to unwrap. Uproariously funny and clever

the devil and the deep blue sea by @waywarder Rated M

Calling all sea creature nerds, and anyone who has ever taken a date to the aquarium and talked too much about fish for several hours. It’s a delight to see the personalities shine through so clearly in this AU!

The Discord Servers of Hell by @ineffablelawr Rated T

Hell has discord and it turns out exactly how you would think. Really cute Fun With Formats fic!

Faster than a Speeding Bentley by @moondawntreader Rated M

An incredible AU that had me laughing aloud to a degree that frightened the neighbor’s cat. Crowley gets bitten by a mutagenic snake and becomes a superhero, and the care and thought and creativity given to his superhero identity is just magnificent!

The Fine Print by @fremulon Rated T

Read it for the life-giving office job catharsis, read it for the nonstop, top-tier jokes, read it for an amazing example of an AU with similar plot beats to the original GO in a wildly different setting, just read it!

For a Sheep as a Lamb by @brightwanderer Rated T

I feel like this fic takes the T rating as a challenge, and the results are so much fun

A Good Old-Fashioned Cock-up by @brightwanderer Rated M

DIFFICULT not to shriek while reading, Aziraphale’s bit of bastard on full, glorious display

an institute you can’t disparage by @mortifyingideal Rated G

prepare yourself for the post-pandemic weddings of all your acquaintances with this absolute romp

Let’s Build a Vivarium by @waldosakimbo Rated G

WaldosAkimbo is out to make me emotional about demons again and doing a fantastic job. Super funny and touching!

The Magician in the Bushes by @caffeinechic Rated T

A fabulous meet-cute featuring The Amazing Mr. Fell and Caterer Crowley, you can HEAR Sheen and Tennant saying the dialogue in this I swear

One Golden Glance of What Should Be by bulfinch Rated T

A really beautiful through-time collection of vignettes themed around Crowley’s snake eyes, haunting and lovely

The Ordinary World by @antikate Rated E

How do you write about an impossible grief? and how do you come back from it to find an impossible joy? Idk but Anti_Kate has done it and it’s an absolute page turner (Next Chapter clicker?) on top of that

The Private Collection by @entanglednow Rated E

Pure, Grade AAA (or perhaps XXX) absurdity, outrageously funny

Reptiles of the Mind by CiderApples Rated G

a gorgeous, ambiguous slice of post-apocalypse life

rumours (and other things that thrive in the dark) by @forineffablereasons Rated G

this is CANON now, I love this backstory on Crowley’s traffic jacket and the mixture of sweetness, humor, and longing

and truth (and other things that thrive in the light) by @forineffablereasons Rated E

….and there’s a delightful sequel in which the jacket reappears for some Very Good Times

Shiver At Your Touch by @mintly Rated E

Crowley and Aziraphale go wild on one of London’s biggest tourist attractions, and their banter is pitch-perfect and supremely adorable

Sometimes a Snake is Just a Snake by AstroGirl Rated T

I’m a sucker for a fake advertisement, and this fic has truly excellent bickering wherein Crowley bemoans his image being used for commercial purposes

Treasures of Heaven by @heavens-bookshop Rated G

A new favorite outside POV fic, this is so, so charming and makes me pine for the times of coffeeshops past!

two if by sea by @theseedsofdoom Rated G

I am now desperately longing to be wandering around a foggy island off the coast of Maine

Vapour in Your Love by @antikate Rated E

This fic is so funny it makes me want to scream, read this while drinking a beverage at your OWN PERIL

#good omens #good omens fic recs #good omens rec list #go fic recs #ineffable husbands

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bigskydreaming · 3 years

Text

Its not complicated. When Dick’s siblings continuously make fun of not things or experiences they share in common with him from their time together as family, but JUST the things that stem from where he comes from, the things he keeps as reminders of his parents and first home, ‘they’re siblings’ doesn’t excuse them any more than when snobby Gotham socialites make the same comments.

Dick’s name - he keeps it not as an invitation to make fun of him or call him an asshole, but because its what his parents called him.

Dick’s costumes - he made not to be fashionable but to remind him of home, of the circus.

Dick’s showy moves - he makes not to grandstand and be the center of attention, but because that’s the way his parents taught them to him. They’re MEANT to be performative. He’s a PERFORMER as much as a vigilante. And that’s not a commentary on his PERSONALITY, because he doesn’t do that because he wants to rub others’ faces in being better than them at acrobatics or whatever, due to some particular insecurity or need to overcompensate....he’s a performer not due to ISSUES but due to HIS FAMILY’S CHOSEN LIFESTYLE. There are different kinds of showing off. There’s doing it to impress, and there’s doing it because the moves you were taught were literally designed to show off feats of acrobatics that wow and amaze and get people to buy tickets? Like....

And we all know the story with Robin - nah, they don’t make fun of him for that one, just hate and resent him for ever daring to act proprietary about the thing he made out of the vestiges of his first home and family long before he ever knew he’d have siblings or successors.

Now to recap - when the SPECIFIC things that people make fun of Dick for in fics are....his name, his costumes, his showy moves.....

They’re not making fun of HIM, because none of those things originated with HIM or just because he randomly felt like making any of those a thing.

They’re making fun of where he came from, WHO he came from. There’s no ifs, ands or buts about it. No matter how much you want it to be otherwise, when Jason calls Dick a Dickhead, he’s not making a clever sibling in-joke, he’s making fun of the fact that its even Dick’s name at all. And as siblings, that would be one thing if that name were given to him by the parent they BOTH share.

But its not.

Dick didn’t pick that name out of a hat, he keeps it because of his parents.

Ergo, no matter how you spin it, when Jason or anyone else makes fun of that name to any degree at all, or uses it as an insult, its not a joke or insult at DICK’S expense.

But at his PARENTS.

And see, that’s why it would be fine as a sibling joke if it came from a parent they both share. Because Jason or one of the other siblings would be making fun of a SHARED parent choosing that name for Dick, and Dick refusing to part with it for whatever reason. Jason or another sibling would to some degree, still be ‘in’ on the joke being made. Still included within the circle of family that the joke is ACTUALLY about, at the expense of.

But Dick’s parents and the things they gave him have NOTHING to do with ANY of his other siblings, except for Robin, and that only with the blessing Dick bestowed on each of them TO share it.

They don’t exist for anyone BUT Dick to ‘approve’ of. They’re not kept by Dick for anyone else to weigh in on. They’re kept out of sentimentality.

So when the others joke about or attack these specific things of Dick’s....

HE is not the target, and siblinghood doesn’t make it go down any easier.

They’re attacking and making fun of his SENTIMENTALITY, about a part of his family they have NO connection to themselves.

And this makes them no different from any other Gothamite or hero making fun of....Dick’s name, the performative nature of his movements, his costumes.

Because their connection to where these come from doesn’t exist anymore than it does for any of those other people.

And why exactly do you think Dick is okay with people continuously punching down at his PARENTS’ choices for him?

See the nuance there?

And when you, the author, think its hilarious commentary to have characters poke fun at the things that literally ONLY stem from Dick’s origins....from an in-universe perspective, how is your commentary any different from that of the snobby socialite characters you use the other family members to disparage for being....snobby and elitist about various Wayne family members’ origins? Why do you think Dick’s origins are an acceptable exemption here, and do you think MAYBE. POSSIBLY. There are certain....commonalities in the snobby elitism that you claim drives these Gothamite NPCs to look down on various Waynes and uh.....you....doing...the...same thing?

Juuuuuust wondering.

NOW.

Cuz we’re not done.

On to Damian.

Yes, yes. The Demon Brat. The Demonspawn.

Called that, because well, its obvious right? He’s the grandson of the Demon’s Head.

Who......Damian hates?

Willfully turned his back on, by choice?

Deliberately chose to reject, along with his philosophy and his ways, when he embraced the Batfamily’s credos instead? When he devoted himself to THEIR chosen path, rather than....that of the Demon’s Head?

Who by his own conscious volition, THREW AWAY his unasked for associations with Ra’s, to CLAIM his Wayne associations as the ones he wanted instead?

This is a family of choice, we’re all agreed on there.

So.....you guys know that Damian, while yes, ‘the blood son’....ALSO made a choice right? When he chose THEM....instead of...Ra’s?

And that’s.....kinda a big deal?

And also, let’s not forget, uh....Ra’s doesn’t give a shit about Damian and just wants his body to wear like a three-piece suit? Yeah, lotta loving associations for Damian there.

Every time the others call Damian a Demon Brat or Demonspawn, you’re essentially having them say no matter WHAT Damian’s done to distance himself from Ra’s, who he NEVER HAD A CHOICE in being tied to by birth....

They won’t let him have that distance.

He will always be linked to the Demon’s Head....even in his own family’s eyes. His family, who otherwise all prioritize their CHOSEN connections with the Wayne family over their OWN origins.

.....why exactly do you feel Damian would be falling over himself to like them and be nice to them as long as they keep doing that, when he’s ALREADY done a bajillion things to prove he rejects Ra’s and wants nothing to do with the man or anything he supposedly could or would offer Damian?

(Especially when again, the only thing Ra’s has ever ACTUALLY wanted to offer Damian was an eviction notice for his own body so Ra’s could take up residence).

Idk guys, I’m just saying its kinda funny to have the other siblings resent Dick and Damian for being so much closer to each other than them, when like, your own fics continuously have Dick and Damian being the only ones to actually accept each other’s origins and NOT make fun of them or use them as a weapon against the two of them.

Anyway. Food for thought.

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reidyoulikeabook · 3 years

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hi i saw that your requests are open for the night for that list and i feel like 15&35 with spencer might be all i need to survive

anyways i’m on anon bc i’m scared you’ll hate this request but just know your writing is my favorite i would read your grocery lists at this point

excuse me i love this request please do not disparage yourself ever again <3 that’s the loveliest thing anybody has ever said to me and i will now think of you and this compliment whenever i write a grocery list

Ship: GN! (wears a bra, no mention of gender other than this) Reader x Spencer Reid

Warnings: Mentions of canon-typical case things, pining, mild thievery.

Word count: 2.4k

Prompts: #15 - "You’ve just won one free pass to my bedroom.”

#35 - “Well fuck, didn’t expect to be announcing my undying love for you this early in the morning.”

A/N: This got so ungodly long I’m so sorry I don’t even know if I can call this a blurb at this point it’s a full fic but I loved this idea so much and it ran away from me.

PLEASE let me know what you think because I bashed this out in the span of an hour and I’m not sure if I love or hate it.

Rossi’s spitballing theories behind you. Your head lolls on the desk, feeling far too heavy to attempt lifting up at this time of night. The case was hard, you were sleeping in shifts, and somehow you, Rossi, and Reid had drawn the short straw. Your eyes are blearing a little too much to make out the exact time on the clock, it’s on the opposite side of the room and your eyes burn when you squint to look at the time; you’re fairly certain you’re somewhere on the wrong side of 3am.

23 hours awake.

Sighing, you push yourself up, looking around and only now noting that Spencer isn’t in the room. He must have made his exit while you were flicking through the files making notes, it was often easier to do that with your headphones in.

Thankfully, you'd set up shop in a conference room at the hotel, given the local PD was tiny and barely equipped to handle its own officers.

“What about the meat packing district?” Rossi muses.

It’s a rhetorical question but one you actually have an answer to, “I don’t think so. The busiest part of the city is between the meat packing district and where he’s dumping the bodies. Cops do random stop-and-searches sometimes, I don’t know if he’d risk it.”

“He could drive around.”

You frown, thinking, “He’d be crossing state lines. Hey, wait,” You stand up from your chair, walking to the board and starting drawing circles that illustrate your point, “Spencer thought there must be a pattern, right? But it died off here and we didn’t know about any more victims. If we expanded the search to outside of state lines it might connect here, here, and here,” You circle each here with a point, tapping the pen against the board triumphantly.

Rossi smiles, “Good thinking kid. I’ll call Garcia.”

Exhausted from your breakthrough, you flop back down into the chair. The clothes you’ve been wearing are icky, uncomfortable with sweat and flying and you’re strongly regretting your choice in underwear now too.

You hear the door swing open, looking up to see Spencer entering the room. Holding your go-bag. The one you’d left on the jet this morning. The jet that was a two hour drive from your current location.

“Where did you? When did you?” Your incoherency is related to both your tiredness, and his thoughtfulness.

He smiles, “It took some calling around but I found a cab driver willing to go and pick it up. It just got here.”

“Spencer I-,” You start, scrambling to your feet to accept the bag he’s offering to you, “Thank you. That’s so sweet of you. How much was the cab?”

“Don’t worry about it,” He says, handing it to you and heading over to the board, “What are these?”

Rossi - who was watching the exchange with some amusement - starts explaining the eureka moment you’d had. Spencer nods along, turning to smile at you when Rossi credits the thought to you. It’s something he does a lot, Rossi’s noticed. Not in a condescending way, Spencer knows more than anyone just how capable you are at your job. It’s as if he needs to channel his love for you somewhere, and chooses pride. It’s the easiest one to explain, after all, because who isn’t happy for their colleague making breakthroughs?

That’s how Spencer justifies it anyhow.

You leave the room, heading to the bathroom to change. You’re incredibly grateful to slip out of your dirty clothes and the bra that’s cutting into you, so much so that you decide to pop on a t-shirt under your blazer. The sports bra and t-shirt combo revitalises you more than you thought possible for this hour.

Digging through, you find an item that you didn’t pack. A pair of brown fluffy slippers. Attached to them, a note, ‘I thought the heels on your boots looked uncomfortable, and I didn’t want your feet to hurt. - Spencer.

He signed the note. Something about that, alongside the gift itself, sends a flush of warmth through you.

He gave you his slippers

So?

Is that something friends do?

Wracking your brain, you try to think up if he’d do this for anyone else. Hotch? The thought makes you laugh. Emily? Maybe, actually. If she didn’t make it so hard for others to take care of her. Penelope? Almost definitely.

Your heart sinks a little, and you distract yourself by fumbling to get your work boots off and the slippers on.

It doesn’t matter it isn’t romantic, it matters that he did it.

It matters to every other person you date

He sets an impossibly high bar

Thankfully, the late hour means that there aren’t many local PD still hanging around to see your interesting choice of shoe. You slip through to the conference room, where Spencer and Rossi are huddled over the phone talking to Garcia.

Spencer does a double-take. He knew the gift he’d given you, but he hadn’t expected to see you...wearing them? You look beautiful: hair mussed from fiddling with it, an old college t-shirt under your blazer, brown fluffy slippers on your feet. The mix of professional and homely attire does something to him that he can’t quite explain, and he has to clear his throat before making his next point to Garcia.

Did he just blush?

You try not to stare at him, try not to see if that’s a tinge of red creeping up under his turtleneck.

It is.

“Thanks Garcia,” Rossi clips, hanging up the phone, “I’m going to go and find some coffee. You two,” He points, looking knowingly between you, “Just keep doing what you’re doing.”

No sooner has Rossi left the room, you both try speaking at once.

“You look-” He starts.

“Thank you so-” You start.

You both tinge with warmth.

“You go first,” He says, gnawing at his plump lower lip, finger turning oer the pen in his hand.

You laugh, a little breathless, “Well fuck, I wasn’t expecting to be announcing my undying love for you this early in the morning.”

His eyebrows quirk, is that...hope?

No. Wishful thinking

It’s probably confusion, and you’re a little embarassed, so you quickly clarify, “I mean Spencer Reid this is the kindest thing anyone has ever done for me. I’m endebted to you forever, really.”

A look washes over him: disappointment? You can’t trust your eyes to see the clock, so you feel you can’t entrust them to analyse his micro-expressions right now either. Especially when you’re biased by personal desire.

“It’s no problem,” He says, voice cracking a little, “You look...” He trails off.

“Unprofessional?” You suggest, teasing.

He shakes his head, swallowing, “You look really nice.”

It’s your turn to swallow. You drop your gaze to the pen, feeling too flustered to continue looking your colleague in the eyes at this moment in time, “Thank you. Where did you get slippers at this time of night?”

He shifts, one hand settling over the wrist of the other and fingers nervously rubbing over the back of his hand, “They were uhm. They were mine.”

“Yours?”

“Yeah,” It comes out pitchy, a squeak, “I’m sorry, that’s probably weird I just thought-”

“No, Spence,” You say, looking up at him and giving him a genuine smile, “No, it’s really sweet. I’m really lucky to have you.”

He gives his signature tiny tight-lipped smile, the one he gives when he’s feeling awkward or suppressing something he wants to say but can’t.

Please let it be the latter.

You relinquish him of the obligation of responding, instead standing to join him at the board, “You think you’ve got enough to make a geographical profile out of this?”

He nods, tapping the board with his pen, “Your idea about crossing interstate lines was really smart.”

“I have my moments.”

He wants to tell you that everything you have is a moment. You want to step closer, to cup his face in your hands, to press a kiss to the lips that you swear are pouting, begging to be kissed. You don’t.

Namely, because Rossi chooses this moment to re-enter the room, clutching three cups of coffee, “A little help here?”

From the way you spring apart, despite not even being that close, he wishes he’d taken a little longer. Damn kids and their inability to express their feelings for one another.

***

It’s 4:30am when the alarm on your phone goes off. With the work of the four of you - Garcia sporadically included when she had genius updates - you’ve managed to uncover a pattern that arches across states. You’d called Hotch, who’d commended the good work and advised that you should head to bed at 4:30. The others would get up then, and start to head out to the different potential crime scenes. Local PD was already on it.

You’d been told under no uncertain terms that you were to rest until at least 10am. Unless there was a call from Hotch. You prayed there wouldn’t be.

Rossi’s off the minute the alarm rings, bustling out the door with a “See you later kids.”

You wait behind while Spencer packs his things into his satchel. Or rather, unpacks his things from his satchel, frantically tearing it apart.

“What are you looking for?” You ask.

“My key card,” He murmurs, “I swear it was in my wallet.”

“You were rooming with Morgan, right? Want me to call him?”

“Yes please,” He says, continuing to unearth the contents of his bag onto the desk, with an increasing degree of agitation every second that goes by.

You dial Morgan’s number, and he answers after two rings, “Hey kid.”

You put the phone on loudspeaker.

“Hey. I’m with Spencer, we’re about to head up to our rooms for the night, are you still here? He can’t find his keycard.”

He lets out a breath of air through his teeth, “Sorry, I’m already on my way to one of the crime scenes. Local PD found a body over the state line. Nobody’s at the hotel but you guys and Rossi.”

Spencer outwardly sighs.

“No problem, we’ll figure something out.”

“Alright, good work kid, get some rest.”

The phone line clicks. Spencer’s brow is pinched with frustration, and your heart breaks for him. You’ve all been awake well over 24 hours, and he looks exhausted. He’s more eyebag than man at this point.

“Do you want me to go to the front desk?” You ask.

He shakes his head, “Reception doesn’t open until 6am. I’ll just wait here until then.”

He starts packing the belongings back into his bag, a resigned look on his face. And you have an idea.

“Actually,” You say, pulling the keycard out of your pocket and sliding it across the table to him, “You’ve just won one free pass to my bedroom.”

He picks the card up, squinting in confusion.

“Me and Rossi both got put in single rooms. I mean, it might not be the most comfortable thing in the world, both of us in a single bed, but it’s better than nothing right?”

He opens his mouth to object, and you shake your head.

“Spence you look like you’re about to drop unconscious on the floor and I don’t want to be responsible for yet another injureid.”

You’re so tired that the pun seems hilarious to you, and it does elicit a small laugh from him.

“Come on, it’s either share a bed with me, share a bed with Rossi, or try to sleep in one of these chairs. And I’ll be honest, I’d be kind of offended if you’d rather either of the other two options.”

“I can sleep on the floor,” He says, obviously warming up to the offer but not wanting to push his luck. You can hear the hesitancy in his voice.

“You can. But you won’t,” You tell him, settling your go-bag on your shoulder, “And might I remind you that all this time you’re spending objecting are minutes we could be spending sleeping.”

That seems to win him over. He tucks everything back into his bag, zipping it up, “After you.”

“You have the keycard,” You smile, “After you.”

***

The bed is a single bed. It prompts another round of ‘No really, I can sleep on the floor’ from Spencer, your enquiries about if it’s too much for his germaphobia or issues with touching, and his blushy embarassed reassurance that he doesn’t mind if it’s you.

He doesn’t mind if it’s you.

Not as if you’ll spend the next year mulling over those words or anything.

When you get out of the bathroom from changing, Spencer is tucked up in bed. Well, you say tucked up, but he’s practically lay right on the edge. How he’s actually physically still being supported by the mattress at this point must be his physics magic.

“I thought I said I didn’t want you getting injured,” You say, crossing the room to him.

He opens his eyes, “I didn’t want to-”

“It’s okay Spence,” You tell him, huddling down into bed.

There’s about enough room for you both to fit in, with an inch between you, so you pull gently at his arms, urging him closer.

“There’s enough room for us both without you going flying in the night,” You tell him.

He nods, obviously still a little nervous. It’s odd, lying face to face with him, illuminated only by lamplight. He looks soft. He always does, but there’s something intimate about this. You can feel his breath fan across your cheek, can feel how heat radiates off his arms.

“Do you want me to turn the lamp off?” He asks.

It’s not your staring that implores him to ask, because he’s been staring at you too. The both of you, trapped in a perfect bubble of a moment. Lamplight a spotlight, highlighting all the features of the person you love most.

“Sure,” You whisper, breath catching in your throat.

He flicks it off, settling back down.

His breath brushes against your face when he asks, “Do you want me to turn around?”

“Do you want to?”

He hesitates for a moment, voice even softer when he answers, “No.”

It’s dark. You can hardly make out his outline. Yet somehow, you both just know. Shifting, infitismally closer. Breaching the tiniest gap between you somehow feels like crossing the Grand Canyon. Your heart thumps in your chest, and you can feel it in your fingers, the fingers that trace cautiously along his jaw.

His mouth finally, finally, slotting against yours in the most gentle of kisses. A blink and you’d miss it.

And yet, in the same blink, your life changes forever.

When Rossi makes a speech at your wedding, he admits to being the thief of the missing keycard, and intentional orchestrator of the greatest love story he’s ever known. His words.

---

Permanent tagslist: @reidingmelodies @takeyourleap-of-faith @sassiest-politician @calm-and-doctor @ssa-m-187 @seasonfivereid @averyhotchner @muffin-cup @purplewaterbottles082 @spencerreid9 @drspencerreidd @reidsnose

(message/reply to this to be added or removed!!)

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds #reid x reader #imagine spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #imagine criminal minds #criminal minds x you #spencer reid fluff #can't believe queue've done this

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sortasirius · 4 years

Note

what makes you think the writers want deancas? not trying to be an asshole, i'm just genuinely curious as to why you think that. i know berens' episodes are pretty heavy with subtext so i can see why you'd say that he wants it, but i'm not so sure about the rest of the writers/dabb. it seems like meghan isn't a huge fan either, given her "they twisted it so fast" tweet :/ of course she's a very new writer (think she's only writing one ep this season?) but still

OKAY this is a great question, welcome to my dissertation.

I’m going to address the end of your question first. Meghan is actually DeanCas positive, she has been for quite a long time. She actually, a few years back, posted a picture of her reading a literal book about Destiel and captioned it “writing reading” or something like that.

This whole thing just comes out of a boiling over of tensions because of how nasty fandom twitter can be. Like I said here, I think this has just gotten blown out of proportion, they shouldn’t have posted all this randomly disparaging stuff, but also like...can you blame them? The fandom is a lot, we always have been, and they’re probably also under a gag order not to talk about the finale, and are annoyed that people keep asking.

So nah, Meg is not anti Destiel.

To the first part!! So let’s take a look at the show runners since Cas has been around.

Seasons 4 and 5: Kripke

Seasons 6 and 7: Gamble

Seasons 8-11ish: Carver

Seasons 11ish-15: Dabb

So starting with Kripke. Okay, yes, I will be the first to admit that we have some pretty incredible Destiel moments in these seasons, but it’s less directly written into the plot and much more from Misha and Jensen’s uhhhh ~chemistry~. The only times it was directly written into the script was when the episode was handled by someone like Edlund (“On The Head Of A Pin,” “The End,” “My Bloody Valentine”). And you have to remember, if in season 5, there are moments here and there where you’re like huh that’s suspiciously romantic dialogue, remember that Cas took Anna’s place. Anna was supposed to be endgame for Dean, but due to a myriad of issues and Misha’s general greatness, Anna was replaced with Cas.

Onto 6 and 7. Hmmm. Gamble. 6 and 7 are my two least favorite seasons and that’s no secret, and that’s not only due to the plain old weird shit in the overall storyline, but also that homegirl killed off Cas in s7 and then Bobby like four episodes later. (Also it ALWAYS rubbed me the wrong way they couldn’t have Baby in that season lol). We still had some great DeanCas moments, but again, it wasn’t really written into the overall arc (until they had to change the end of season 7 because of tanking ratings and bring Misha back lol, anyone remember the fact that Dean kept Cas’ jacket and would randomly dream of him? Yeah.). But we still had those moments, those distinctly romantic moments, probably the best example in these two seasons is from Edlund again, specifically “The Man Who Would be King,” I wrote a little about that here.

We move onto Carver, who gave us, at this point, the most overt DeanCas season with season 8 (season gr8 is a better name imo), and this is the first time Dean and Cas’ relationship is directly written as an arc of the season. I mean, you have everything in Purgatory, Dean “seeing” Cas everywhere, the fact that he felt so guilty that Cas stayed in Purgatory that he manipulated his own memories to think that he was the one that failed Cas, because he couldn’t comprehend that Cas would want to leave him, and let’s not forget Dean snapping Cas out of Naomi’s hold on him in “Goodbye Stranger.” It was a very obvious shift, not enough to alert the general audience, but more than enough for most of us in fandom.

It’s also important to note that this is when Andrew stopped co writing with Loflin and started writing his own episodes (”Hunter Heroici” anyone?) I like Loflin fine, but Dabb was able to stretch his legs a little bit more once he stopped co-writing, and we also began to see some DeanCas themes in his solo episodes.

In any case, them and their issues being a big part of the seasons continued with Carver, and Berens entered the scene, his first episode (”Heaven Can’t Wait”) is one of my favorites, with human Cas and the fanfiction gap and Dean and Cas just generally being awkward and funny and sweet. This is Bobo’s FIRST episode, remember that. He comes right out of the gate with it.

Also in Season 9, this is when Dean takes the Mark of Cain, and the Cas/Colette mirror is born, so obviously, Dean and Cas are the fabric of the season once again. This is also the season where Metatron says Cas is “in love with humanity,” and then immediately refers to Dean as Humanity so uhhhh yeah.

Onto season 10, Dabb and Berens continue with their greatness (I could write pages on the DeanCas date in “The Things We Left Behind” alone). And then we have one of the best scenes in the entire show in “The Prisoner” where the Cas/Colette mirror continues and Dean, driven by grief and pain and rage and the Mark, still doesn’t kill Cas. He still can’t kill Cas.

Season 11 is important because it takes choice away from both Cas and Dean, and shows us, as the audience, how much losing each other takes out of them. We saw in season 10 how much losing Dean takes from Cas, but what about Cas losing Dean? Dean loses his choice with his connection to Amara this season, and loses even more when Lucifer reveals he’s been possessing Cas, and plays on Dean’s connection to Cas like a mockery. It’s also worth noting that, similarly to season 8, Dean breaks out of the connection with Amara when he’s worried about Cas, and that’s something that even SHE is surprised by.

But then season 12, the beginning to the Renaissance. This is when we get the writer’s that become important for what Dean and Cas are today, and, truly, why I believe they want canon Destiel as much as we do.

This is the first season with Dabb’s writers: Davy Perez, Meredith Glynn, Steve Yockey, and of course Bobo all come in with their incredible talents and gave us episode after episode of good content. “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets” is probably my favorite, probably the best example of what I’m saying. An episode where Dean is called out by an enemy directly, told to “roll the dice” on Cas’ life. And Dean won’t, it’s not even really a hesitation. And this comes from a character that has known Dean for ten seconds. I also wrote more in depth about this episode here. There are also some.....distinctly domestic details we get this season, specifically in “The Future” (written by Berens and Glynn) with the mixtape. The most tropey of tropes mixtape. Yeah, I’ll just leave that one here.

And then season 12 ends with Cas’ death, but also with the parallel between Sam and Dean with Jess and Cas. Sam literally has to drag Dean away from Cas, just like Dean had to drag Sam out of his burning apartment in the pilot. The episode drives it home in every way that it can: Dean is the one left kneeling by Cas’ body, while Sam goes to find out what is upstairs. Dean is the one who stares at the sky, finally broken. This isn’t a random thing, this is Dean’s whole arc, it’s the entirety of the beginning of 13. Dean’s pain, his anguish, his anger.

Season 13 starts with them burning Cas, with Dean, who has begged God to bring him back, who has split his knuckles punching a door, standing, staring at Cas’ pyre with brokenness on his face.

I mean.....

Anyway, season 13 is where it gets interesting (well, I think all of this is interesting but I’m a writer nerd so). So Cas comes back from the Empty in “Advanced Thanatology” written by Steve Yockey, and then a wombo combo of “Tombstone” by Davy Perez next (”Brokebacknatural” as the PR said at the time). Listen. This is the part that SPN crossed a line that they couldn’t come back from. With Cas being Dean’s “big win,” the fact that Dean and Cas watch movies together, “I told you, he’s an angry sleeper. Like a bear.” Talked about it here.

This is where, in my opinion, the network stepped in, but the damage was already done. They had already established that Cas was Dean’s big win, that Dean’s poor coping was not due to Mary’s disappearance, but solely due to Cas, and that Dean and Cas have more married energy than anyone else. The network had nixed blatant canon at this point, and they writing room had been pushing the boundaries of what the network would allow.

After these episodes, we see a marked drop off of DeanCas heavy scenes. They’re still there, still a part of the fabric of the season, but not as...obvious as it had been in early season 13.

And this continued through season 14, we’re back to scraps of Destiel scenes here and there, but to me it always felt like there was something bubbling under the surface, something distinctly unsaid in the themes of the season, even after the walk back of obvious “Dean and Cas are in love” scenes.

And then we get to season 15, which, y’all know I talk about all the time. What’s important here is that Bobo and Glynn are both executive producers, calling more of the shots than ever before. Additionally, it’s important to note that, though they only co write occasionally, Glynn and Berens refer to each other as “work husband” and “work wife.” Each episode has just turned up the volume, and, not for the first time, but certainly the most obvious, Dean and Cas ARE the season. Sure, they’re trying to beat God, they’re trying to finally find peace, defeat the final big bad, but really? This season has been about Dean, and Dean’s relationship to Cas.

And not only do we have obvious and clear Destiel in nearly every episode, but we have episodes like “Last Call” which canonize bi!Dean (wrote about that here).

And, maybe most importantly so far, we have “The Rupture,” the breakup, and “The Trap,” Dean’s confession (both written by Berens). And here’s the thing. These episodes feel connected, but also feel like they’re missing something. Beren’s last episode is 15x18, “The Truth.” We’ve all spec’ed about what could happen in this episode, and I think *I* know what it’s leading to. But for it to be leading to that, it means that the network has to have approved what we’ve all been waiting for years for.

Who got this change to happen? Who got the network to change their minds? It wasn’t us. It was them. I am fully convinced that Dabb and Berens quite literally put their careers on the line for Dean and Cas. They believe in them, they’ve shown that from the beginning, but the only thing standing in the way was the network, never allowing them to take the final step.

So, to answer your question: I think the writers want canon DeanCas because they’ve already shown us that they do. Take a look at their episodes, at Dabb’s, at Beren’s, at Glynn’s, at Perez’s, at Yockey’s. They’ve been telling us what’s going on with Dean and Cas for years.

Sure, I’m not in their heads, I guess I don’t know for *sure* that this has been their thought process, but if we put it all together, from the marked shift when Dabb fully took over in s12, to the change right after “Tombstone,” to the new shift, the blatantly romantic shift in season 15, what else is there?

I’ve said for a long time that we, the SPN fandom, are beyond lucky to have the writer’s that we do. They’re all going to go on to have prolific careers and we were lucky to get them at the end of our little show. I give them a lot of credit for what we have in the show today.

Just remember, they’ve been telling us in all of s15 who Chuck is. He says he’s the writer, right? But a writer who doesn’t have control of his characters? A writer who wants to do the same ending over and over because it “works”? That doesn’t sound like a writer, it sounds like a network exec.

They’ve been showing us what they want for years, and the way s15 is going? I think they may have convinced the network to let us have it.

#supernatural #destiel #spn #my writing #anyway yeah i love these writers #welcome to my essay lmao #spn writers #anonymous #lilly answers

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commander-diomika · 3 years

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[Image ID: Screenshot of a tumblr reply from user @weareallfromearth saying “Holy shit I would V much like to know what you’d do with ZolfWilde.” End ID]

This was in response to me tag rambling that if Alex “I don’t Actually Have That Much Experience in Courtship” Newall and Ben “I just Realised I’m Too Straight For This” Meredith don’t know what to do with Zolf/Wilde, they should hand the ship over to me.

*rubs my gay little hands together.*

I initially characterized them offhandedly as Enemies-to-Lovers but that’s not quite it, is it? On reflection I would say it’s more of an Opposites Attract situation.

Oscar Wilde, as re-imagined in the RQG universe, is a homme fatale; a dangerous, attractive man, skilled in encouraging people to underestimate him, wearing different masks, never quite being able to trust or be trusted by anyone.

There is NO personal/professional line for Wilde. He lives his work, and his work is subterfuge and interpersonal manipulation. (whether or not he started this way in his field as a journalist, or was forced to become this way by the changes in his world, is another post.) He is a person who either cares very deeply what people think of him, or is has decided that manipulating what people think of him is the way to get what he wants, and from the outside it makes no difference.

Zolf Smith does not care what people think of him. He isn’t even skilled at being kind and empathetic to people he cares about; he has no time for emotional manipulation or genuine charm. He doesn’t even have a fantastic grasp on his OWN feelings, let alone other people’s. He’s grounded, disinterested in frippery or appearances. Which is why Zolf and Wilde started out so deeply at odds with one another.

Despite the differences in the interpersonal approaches, they have plenty of common ground.

They are both deeply dedicated to a cause. They care about their work to the exclusion of all else. They are both pragmatists who have their own internal moral code, and are willing to bend or break other people’s rules in order to get the job done. They are fundamentally good people. Despite their rocky beginnings, they can respect each other because of these things.

And they might have maintained their mutually disdainful, begrudgingly respectful working relationship and that could have been the sum total... Except then the world fell apart. The Meritocratic organisation was initially compromised, then disintegrated. The blue vein plague isolated everyone and made it even harder to trust supposed allies. The Cult of Hades was on everyone’s ass making their life difficult, the other PCs disappeared off the face of the planet. Zolf and Wilde ended up in a situation where they had no one else they could trust.

Familiarity breeds contempt, but maybe if the contempt is already there, it builds Something Else. Wilde was stripped of his magic in a way that made it much harder for him to keep people at a distance and (pardon the pun) project the illusion of the debonair playboy. Zolf would have had the chance to see through Wilde’s masks, and get a better understanding of what parts of Wilde were a calculated tactic, and what was his genuine self.

Whatever betrayal transpired that gave Wilde his scar and hardened him, Zolf was privy to. He was either there and saw it happen, or he was close enough in the aftermath to see Wilde properly vulnerable for the first time in their friendship. Hell, maybe Zolf was the one who rescued him and patched him up. That was a chance for Zolf to realise that this insufferable man is a friend who he cares about deeply. At this point, he’s cared for awhile, but has been too wrapped up with his own spiritual difficulties to have space to admit that to himself.

And Wilde, oh Wilde, he’s desperate to be seen and known and loved, but he’s never allowed himself. He’s never felt SAFE to. He doesn’t let people get close, treats every conversation as a battle to be won. His safety and his power lies in being admired, but never loved. So even as trust and fondness for Zolf blossoms within him, he won’t for a second allow himself to hope that the fondness is reciprocated

With all that out of the way, this is my version of events.

Wilde is a slut (affectionate), and Zolf is gray-ace, so if there’s any bridging of that gap in terms of physical intimacy, it has to be from Zolf’s side. Giving canon a tender massage into place, that first instance of Zolf grabbing Wilde by the collar changes. (This happens on the Vengeance after Zolf has taught Wilde to steer the ship). Zolf drags Wilde down to say “I’m glad to see you perked up.” That moment now involves a whiskery kiss on Wilde’s cheek, and the man would be absolutely FLOORED by it.

I’m talking slow-mo glittering lights as Zolf stomps off blushing, unsure what just came over him; Wilde touches his cheek in bewilderment for a stretched moment before realising he’s completely agog, and he let go of the wheel for a dangerous length of time. Every interaction, every moment they’ve spent together over the last two years is flashing before Wilde’s eyes and a new context is being applied rapid fire. I’m talking the italacised oh kind of moment.

(on top of Zolf being witness to The Betrayal, throw some other moments of almost-intimacy into said flashbacks. I’m talking late nights, Zolf doing his gruff-yet-kind caretaker thing, cooking for Wilde, maybe sharing quiet and rare downtime with Zolf reading a Campbell novel on a couch in Wilde’s office)

Wilde is realising, “Oh this is allowed, oh this is reciprocated, this is possible.”

And of course they don’t talk about it, because what’s a slowburn if they immediately go and TALK about their feelings? No, the kiss goes completely unremarked upon, and Wilde continues to needle and tease and get under Zolf’s skin, except now with an added warmth in his eyes because he finally gets it. He finally understands that Zolf cares, that Zolf loves him, he’s just not the kind of dwarf that knows how to express it.

And Zolf, frustrated by feelings he can’t express but is beginning to understand, can hear the undertone of “haha, you looooove me,” shining through Wilde’s deliberate antagonism. They continue their time on the Vengeance just a little easier and closer to one another.

And we continue on to the death/resurrection arc, and Wilde’s spirit pushes for Zolf to open up about his feelings, because if not when he’s literally past death’s door, then when? When Zolf finally manages his “I need you,” it’s like a dam has broken for both of them. The second collar-grab and “We’ll go on a holiday or somethin’,” is now followed by a full kiss on the lips, not particularly erotic but passionate, (it’s the epitome of kissing someone to shut them up) and Wilde makes a surprised and delighted squeak that he would be glad he can’t quite remember when he returns to land of the living.

Once returned, Wilde might not remember everything that his spirit said or did, but he remembers the kiss. The comfort and ease that the two of them share in 179 (Eat Drink and Be Merry) is there, only instead of the two characters still being in a place of questioning their feelings for one another, it’s been answered.

Whether or not this relationship is sexual in nature is kind of up to you and what kind of fan works you like to read/write. I think there are wonderful scenes to be written an explored in many directions.

Wilde allowing himself to enjoy sex for intimacy and closeness instead of using it as a tool/ Zolf not being one for sex but Wilde’s never slept more soundly than when he’s being held in Zolf’s arms/ Zolf realising that the unfamiliar feeling he’s been struggling to express is the desire to rail Wilde til he cries/ Wilde realising that if his partner doesn’t want it from him, he’s actually quite content without sex/ The two of them being mean, antagonistic bastards to each other while fucking but Make It Kink (of the trusting and RACK kind). There really isn’t a single bad interpretation.

So really, I’m not doing anything different with them other than reading between the lines, giving canon a little nudge, and sticking the landing. This isn’t to disparage the concept of queer platonic partners. (I’ve got one!) or to talk shit about Ben or Alex (I DO respect their craft).

It’s just to say I find these two characters , and everything they’ve been through, PAINFULLY romantic, tropey, and delightful. I’m looking forward both to how Ben and Alex play the QPP, the fanworks I’m gonna read and hopefully write, and the inevitable tragedy that you KNOW Alex is gearing up for.

#zoscar #zolfwilde #RQG #rusty quill gaming #zolf smith #RQG Oscar Wilde #hank talks #rqg podcast #rqg meta #feel free to reblog #and to talk to me about it

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