#I would really love a community to grow in
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dabi, hawks, bakugo, & kirishima with a civilian s/o
requested by @crimsonredlotus
“I would like to do a request!
Head canons for Dabi, Hawks, Bakugo, and Kirishima, with a civilian lover/partner?😩🫶 Maybe you could also add on how their friends react? I think it would be funny.👀
Plus any other you might wanna throw in <3”
dabi / todoroki touya:
⤷ him having a civilian partner is so….. interesting.
⤷ i think you’d have to really sympathize with him or just be completely oblivious. i just can’t really see him being with a civilian considering his status.
⤷ but if he was with one— it was possibly because you treated him like a human being despite how he looks/who he is.
⤷ dabi would definitely make sure your relationship wasn’t known to any rivals or pros, as they could weaponize you against him or take you to jail for being an ‘accomplice’.
⤷ if the LOV (pre season 6) found out he was dating a civilian, there’d be mixed reactions—
⤷ toga, twice, and compress would be supportive. at least that’s what i think.
⤷ kurogiri and spinner would be very cautious and on edge.
⤷ and shigaraki would hate it. he feared you’d end up becoming a liability but!! thanks to much convincing (from dabi and most of the league), he let it pass.
⤷ anyways.
⤷ i think he’d be more careful with a civilian partner.
⤷ like— when you both go out, he takes a lot more precautions. he covers up more than he usually would and he doesn’t steal as much or at all.
⤷ he’s not a good partner at first, he didn’t have the best example growing up. his views are warped.
⤷ but he grows and learns (and gets scolded by toga), he becomes a good bf!
hawks / takami keigo:
⤷ had to subside my hatred for him to do this request…
⤷ anyways,
⤷ hawks having a civilian s/o just makes sense.
⤷ he likes the normality you bring him after a long day of hero work.
⤷ he appreciates his fans, he really does— but, it gets tiring being the ‘mellow, happy’ hero all the time.
⤷ and the emotional toll that comes with being a pro— he just needs that comfort. that safe warmth you provide at the end of a long day.
⤷ he never intended for your relationship to become public.
⤷ one day, it just sort of happened.
⤷ he saw you while on patrol and on instinct he went to you.
⤷ normally it’d be seen as a cute fan interaction but before he left he said “see you at home” and everyone lost it.
⤷ it surprised his fans that he’s with a civilian but to his colleagues, they weren’t shocked at all.
⤷ when the talk of relationships found their way into conversations, he would always mention how he’d want a civilian partner.
⤷ they already knew of you, obviously. you always attended any gatherings with him.
⤷ i think he’s very attentive but he has those moments where he gets completely sucked into work and accidentally ignores you.
⤷ him ignoring you is never intentional but when he realizes that’s what he’s doing or when you communicate that with him, he snaps out of it and does his best to make it up to you.
⤷ he likes buying you things— that’s definitely his love language. even if it’s something small, he’ll get it cause it reminds him of you!
⤷ he wants to treat you the best he’s able to—
⤷ he wants to give you everything he can.
bakugo katsuki:
⤷ i think bakugo having a civilian s/o is so cute bc it’s so out of the ordinary for him.
⤷ like— you’d never guess he’d ever look at anyone that regard, let alone a civilian.
⤷ but the first time you both had met— it was the sweetest thing. it was as if love at first sight was real.
⤷ you probably caught his attention by warding off a villain on your own or something of the sort.
⤷ hence, the love at first sight.
⤷ i think he finds your quirk super useful and sometimes berates you for not becoming a hero.
⤷ of course he respects your choice not to— but, still. he thinks you would’ve been a badass pro.
⤷ i don’t think his friends would find out about your relationship until he casually mentioned having them over to meet you. (he loves his friends and wants their approval)
⤷ now— when the public finds out about the relationship, all hell breaks loose!!
⤷ it’s on every headline. ‘pro hero dynamight spotted with secret lover!’
⤷ the two of you end up sitting down and talking about this for hours— deciding to confirm and reveal your relationship.
⤷ once that happens, he’s a openly affectionate with you.
⤷ he’s very big on dates, absolutely loves to take you out on them—
⤷ so now that your relationship is public, he’s so happy bc he can take you to more places.
⤷ he’s a bit of a worry wart, believe it or not.
⤷ he knows that you can handle your own but, still. he needs to know you’re safe at all times.
⤷ he’s big on acts of service so he’s always doing something for you. whether it be organizing something you’ve been putting off or learning to cook your favorite meal.
kirishima eijiro:
⤷ i don’t think anyone would be surprised that he has a partner that’s not a hero.
⤷ he doesn’t care about status or things that most (superficial) heroes do.
⤷ he’s the classic ‘personality first, beauty second’ type of man and we love that!!
⤷ i think he’d be very open about your relationship!!
⤷ i picture him being with a childhood friend— he just screams ‘childhood friends to lovers’
⤷ his friends are very aware of who you are. he talks about you as if you are a god(dess).
⤷ he practically worships the ground you walk on!!
⤷ the media definitely tries to spin your relationship but he never lets that shit slide. he always calls out their bullshit!!
⤷ there are points where he gets a bit too aggressive with them so you have to reel him back and help his pr team out a bit. (he’s just a silly fella!)
⤷ he’s like,,, the dream bf.
⤷ attentive, patient, gentle (with you), kind, etc etc
⤷ weaponized incompetence? never heard of her!! he’s willing to do anything and everything for you.
⤷ he learns about all of your favorite things— shows, movies, music, etc. he wants to like what you like (though sometimes he just can’t).
my hatred for hawks is justified!! i cannot forgive him for what he did to my pookie bear…………
#/ᐠ - ˕ -マ works — ♡︎#my hero academia x reader#boku no hero x reader#mha x reader#bnha x reader#dabi x reader#hawks x reader#bakugo x reader#kirishima x reader
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Dream within a Dream
Inspired by seeing/hearing Blade caring/being gentle with his allies hhhhhhh also walking around with him in the new area but otherwise no spoilers here
also hello why does my inspiration come back only for angst
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Deep within the dreamscape, where few tread and the world falls silent, a man neither young nor old walks.
His shoes click along the stone; their path familiar yet not often walked. He remains impassive, neither joy nor sorrow on his handsome features.
He has long since become numb to lesser emotions.
The longer he walks, the further away from the world he becomes. The high-rise buildings fade away, the gaps between them growing and growing until they last forever.
Very few remain here.
Soundlessly now, the man travels on, navigating through invisible twists and turns and thriving communities of nothingness.
This deep in the dreamscape, in this general direction and in a place that time forgot, lies a small pocket of memory- neither this man's, nor it's inhabitant's.
It is a dream within a dream, built on a foundation of hope and love and roofed with regret and despair.
This place is not his home. But it is the only place he would dare to call home now.
An unused pocket in his tailcoat lies a key, to which a once steady hand reaches for. The man unlocks the door to this dream, and is greeted by it's suffocating stillness.
So, so different from where he came from; from the dreamscape outside of this pocket. Here, no wind blows, and dust settles upon unused furniture.
This house has no colour, yet the man's presence brings just the faintest of splatterings as he rouses the dust from it's sleep.
"Yingxing?" A sweet voice calls to him, and it steals the breath from his chest.
It always has.
And the man dressed in black brings his dull colours deeper into the house, towards the voice- and stops in the doorway to an old living room.
A face he hasn't seen in a long, long time greets him. This face is old, yet no wrinkles mar it's features. A smile pulls on this person's lips, and a crinkle forms in the corner of each eye.
The man, formerly known as Yingxing, walks silently over to the lone, colourless person.
"How long has it been?" They ask with that same kind, sweet smile. A smile that the man had always adored.
"….two centuries."
He speaks, his voice rough and quiet.
That smile he cherishes so dearly faulters. It's pained, now.
"I see. I missed you."
The man who no longer uses his name walks up to the familiar face- who stands up to greet him- and his strong arms wrap around the person.
"…Yingxing…"
In this embrace, the man can feel nothing. There is no one there- not really, but it's still somewhat unsettling to feel nothing when there is something.
"…you're cold. Would you like some tea?"
The voice is so, so sweet; so kind and gentle, just how he remembers it. He doesn't want to pull away but he does.
"Yes, please."
And the man follows them out to the old kitchen, floorboards creeking beneath his feet- but not theirs.
"I'm guessing you still haven't found a way to…?"
An obvious question that needed not be finished. The man still brought colour to this lifeless memory- and thus, he was still alive.
"…no. Not yet. But hopefully…" He trails off, his thoughts drifting to his promise.
"…it's ok. I told you I'd wait as long as necessary, didn't I?"
The man sits at the homely kitchen table, dust ignored as if it were nothing more then air.
"…forgive me." He still replies as his intense gaze follows the homeowner.
The person clicks their tongue, a sad smile on their lips as they join him at the table with a teapot and teacups. There is no familiar clink of porcelain when the teacups are placed, and when the tea is poured, nothing comes out.
He does not comment on it. Nor will he ever.
"I'm just happy to see you again." The person across from him says.
His crimson gaze flickers from the tealess cup to his other. His throat closes up, and he nearly chokes on his breath.
"I love you." He manages to blurt out.
That sad smile only grows sadder. He hates when you look sad.
"…and I will always love you as well."
Their hands meet on the edge of the table, a thumb that isn't there brushes over his bandaged hand.
"…how much longer can you stay?" He asks quietly, pain clawing at his chest.
"…I don't know." The person replies simply.
The man looks down at the teacup once more. Within the cup are dreams, memories, laughter, hope, and love.
He brings the porcelain to his lips and takes a sip. There is nothing there.
His mouth is filled with the bitter taste of ash and the harshness of dust.
But he doesn't care. He never has, and he never will.
To preserve this phantom dream, he would endure the harshest of pain.
"…Blade."
He lifts his head to find his other half standing before him now.
This meeting was so, so brief.
They always are, now.
He remembers how soft your hand always felt when it cupped his cheek. He tries so desperately to recall that memory when your hand meets his skin, yet he still feels nothing.
The dream before him looks into his eyes, searching wordlessly for everything he is unable to say to them. All the emotions, the memories, the pain…
"Let me- let me do it. Please." He begs so uncharacteristically.
The smile slips from your face, and he's not sure what he hates more: seeing you with a sad smile, or without one at all.
"…I'll hold out. I told you I'd wait as long as it took, and I will."
"You can't promise that anymore."
The man they now call Blade has only ever wished for death this strongly once before. He wishes he could die with ever fiber of his being.
That sadness returns to your face, but you don't smile.
He determines he hates that expression the most.
"Blade-"
Before you can say any more, his lips crash messily into yours. And it is here- and only here- that he finally, finally can feel such a beloved memory.
The warmth of your lips. The pressure of your mouth against his. The taste of your love.
Your love tastes like dust.
His colours, dull as they were, grow stronger only when kissing you; and his colours seep into your memory, bringing life back to your black-and-white dream.
He feels the sting of old wounds resurfacing, the hiss and growl of this sin of eternity digging it's fangs into his soul. But Aeons, he'd do anything to keep you around just a little bit longer.
The kiss breaks, and the colour he imparted to you dissipates swiftly after.
The pain in his chest is almost unbearable. He wants to claw out his heart and all the abundance flowing within him.
You've returned to nothing but a dream; a colourless memory devoid of life. So why, pray tell, why are your tears so vibrant?
"…I miss you. So much." Your voice is broken and pained. Blade places his hand on top of yours, still cradling his cheek. He nuzzles his face into your touch, his own eyes closing as he tries so, so desperately to feel something from your gesture.
He would even take the disgusting warmth of your blood over this nothingness of a dream.
"…I'm sorry. I promise… I promise I'll find a way to return to you. Just… wait for me."
When he opens his eyes, he is surrounded by nothingness. Once again forced into solitude, with nothing but the ghost of your sensationless touch on his skin.
The bubble of memoria flickers before him, as if attempting to comfort him. But there is no comforting a man who's sin has stolen him from his love.
Colourless tears cascade silently down his pale face. Excruciating pain feels like it's tearing his body to shreds.
The memoria flickers and floats. It has no emotion, yet feels so sorrowful and empty.
A bandaged hand, once strong and steady as a blacksmith, now trembling ever-so-slightly from the pain of a broken shell of a man, reaches out to hold this forgotten dream. To cherish it, and beg for it to stay.
But just like you, the bubble flickers in and out of existence, before falling limp in his hand; cascading to the floor in an oozing mess of memoria.
"I'm sorry…"
He murmurs to the dream, and prays that the strength he gave it will allow it to revive itself when next he returns. Perhaps this time he may need to wait a couple thousand years before it will be stable enough to enter again.
After a moment or two of mourning, the man clenches his fist; blood oozing into the bandages as pain shoots through his arm. Wounds old and new, internal and external, all bleed for his loss, cursed to be eternally painful for imparting his life to sustain this dull dream.
In a few minutes, Blade will leave this dreamscape and return to the world of reality. A reality where you are long since gone, and Blade is nothing more than a nickname for a man who has lost everything. A reality where he feels very little except pain and regret.
But right now, in this moment, even if it's nothing more then an oozing mess of memory- you are with him. And right now, that is all that matters.
"I love you."
His broken voice echoes quietly into the nothingness.
#reader insert#honkai star rail#honkai star rail x reader#hsr blade#hsr blade x reader#blade x reader#hsr fanfic
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The over-analysis of Orbo (and the little screen time we have of him)
Welcome to my over analysis of Orbo as a character because I love him dearly, I need to see more of him in season 2, and I’m tired of the evil Orbo trope. This is 7 pages long and reached 2k words yikes. UMM. I don't know how to do introduction so lets jut get right to it:
When we are first introduced to Orbo he falls from above and onto a pedestal. If the audience doesn’t already realize it from the symbolism of putting someone up on a pedestal- where he is angled ABOVE Scarab, the symbol thats etched into it which related to the wings on the phone they use to talk to the Boss we see later can explain to them that Orbo is in an authoritative position over Scarab. Even before mentioning it we can assume that Orbos his boss.
But before we get into their interaction let’s take a moment to observe Orbos design. It's a very simple and obvious silhouette- a circle with purple shades on his face. Usually in character designs to accentuate specific traits in a character, artists would choose one body shape over the other to express that to the viewer. So Orbo being a LITERAL circle, with no sharp pointed edges should already communicate to the audience that he’s not inherently evil or malicious. And often, circles are associated with unity, security, and divinity. In other words, he’s friend shaped.
If the artists wanted to paint Orbo to be a villain/ villain-leaning- wouldn’t they try to express that through his design by adding sharper edges? Giving him more striking colors like red, darker purples, or just a darker color palette in general?
Compared to Scarb who’s all sharp angles and consists of many triangles in his design, even being fully BRIGHT red to showcase that he’s dangerous (a walking red flag if you will)- it just doesn’t make sense for Orbo to be painted as a villain or immoral boss when his design doesn’t match up to that in the slightest.
Anyways. Moving onto the interactions that the two have.
Earlier when Scarab is waiting to have a meeting with Orbo I do want to note that he’s seen being agitated and fidgeting to himself. In the next scene the room Orbo brings him to is full of calming and colorful lights. It feels less intimidating and more casual. It almost seems like a place you would be meditating in.
The scene starts with Orbo spinning around Scarab while growing bigger. While he’s doing this he’s listing off the reasons why he was called into a meeting with him in the first place.
“Ignoring our calls, giving yourself missions, pursuing your own monomanias. I tell ya you’re really whiffing that ball lately.”
And yet despite listing off Scarabs transgression he says this all in a lighthearted tone and expression, if anything it’s barely the kind of scold a boss would give to a coworker who keeps going against orders. He still keeps a very lenient attitude that you wouldn’t normally expect a boss to give to a self-serving co worker like Scarab. He says it almost like he’s asking why Scarab is doing all this, giving him the floor to speak on it.
However, Scarab just completely dismisses what Orbo says so he can request for more time. This to which Orbo scoffs in return- being dismissive to Scarabs dismissiveness.
(analysis has been finished check qrts)
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Moonwood Mill's community has repurposed an old logging factory into their very own local library. Its open and airy structure make it the perfect location to curl up with a book or catch a view of the night sky, and out back, the Wildfangs have dragged old workout equipment into the former loading dock for a handy make-shift gym.
I was bored and decided to make some tweaks to improve the function and overall look of The Moonwood Mill Library! I really do love the concept of the Moonwood community taking an abandoned factory and turning it into a makeshift community space, but the original execution left much to be desired. Don't worry though; I did my best to maintain all the grime, damage, DIY features, and disrepair... but without the gaping empty spaces and random wall and ceiling configurations that were giving more "unfinished building" than "abandoned building."
INFORMATION & DOWNLOAD BELOW ↓
Packs I Used:
This lot is completely CC Free and labeled as a “Library” lot type! This reno uses very few packs and the only objects used from Growing Together and Outdoor Retreat are the sleeping bags (GT) in the sewer area, and the shower (OR), so really you could consider this an Eco Lifestyle, Get To Work, and Werewolves build... as long as you have those three, you will be fine!
TOU: All I ask is that 1. you do not reupload and claim the build as your own (yes, even if you tweak it a little…) and 2. you tag me if you use it! I would love to see this in other people’s games and saves, that’s why I’m sharing it! ❤️
Additional screenshots are on my Patreon post. This build has been play-tested, but please let me know if you run into any in-game issues!
DL: Patreon (always free)
+ @publicvanillabuilds, @pancakesrealty
#Moonwood Mill#ts4#simblr#ts4 community lot#ts4 build#ts4 download#the sims 4#sims 4#ts4 lots#ts4 werewolves#ts4 DL#mybuilds#lot renovations
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Random astrology observations (very shallow but fun ig)
- Mercury conjunct sun in a chart gives very logical/mathematical intelligence you will find that the best student in the classroom always have this conjunction, the closest is the orb, the more pronounced are these qualities.
- Venus in exaltation gives deep thinking abilities and it is perfect for philosophy, think about philosophers like Kant, Plato (allegedly), Karl Marx. Or even scientists like Albert Einstein ( Venus in revati),all influenced our modern world in an unthinkable way.
-Jupiterians remind me of the perfect rennaissance man who is all-rounded excelling in every sphere of intelligence: you will find that they really have a deep love for education: absorbing information and utilizing it in everyday of their lives.
- Ketu people are so funny, the funniest imo like they are kind of lost and dgaf about people so they are really blunt and random it's just very comical
- Mars men are popular or rather notorious: they just have an effect on girls from what I observed: Chitra and Dhanista men most of the time. I know a Chitra sun guy that winks at you everytime you cross eyes with him lol, a dhanista sun and ascendant boy that I know had girls writing their snapchats all over his backpack in high-school also he would get purchased by them like they would form circles around him it was pretty funny to see
- Purva bhadrapada men are SASSY
- Rohini women are really sensitive about their appearance and love when people are jealous of them
- Venusians have a keen eye for aesthetic
- When it comes to writing poetry: Virgo people are simply the best : Uttara phalguni, Hasta and Chitra
- Ketu women are able to see through the illusions of life: especially ketu on the ascendant, their intuition is simply always right
- Having your sun in the 11th house makes you very likable, if it is not afflicted you will have a large circle of friends, be well known in your area.
- A lot of energy in the 12th house add an air of mystery on an individual it can really scare some people off: they can be excluded from their community, can be deemed as scary or weird
- If you want a venusian to like you : be pleasant, smell good, be funny, make them eat well, give out thoughtful gifts. Venus loves sensorial stimulation
- If you want to know what life direction you should be taking, look at your d9 and d60 charts
- Pisces women are in tune with their sexualities: they can loose their virginity at a really young age and are curious about this side of life
- Ashlesha people need to be careful about what they say: they grow up in really harsh environments so they internalize this harshness and sometimes they can really projects on others and hurt with their words for nothing kind of like a snake
Anyways I think that's all I will comeback with more astrology observations on more specific subjects.
Also be mindful, you can not analyze a chart without looking at it completely so these are not to be taken at the letter close, it can always differ depending on the chart: it is simply for entertainment.
#astrology#vedic astrology#vedic astro notes#vedic astro observations#fashion#aesthetic#vintage#cinema#venus#purva bhadrapada
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I’ve been seeing a lot of people in the Splatoon community say that Splatoon 3 ROTM will be the last time we will see the New Squidbeak Splatoon which includes Callie and Marie, but like… no?! Nintendo hasn’t outright said “hey y'all, you like the Squid Sisters and wanna see them continue to grow and develop? TOO BAD BITCH!! THEY AIN'T COMING BACK AFTER THIS GAME HA HA! IT'S JUST OFF THE PEAK AND DEEP PEAK NOW BUDDY! ENJOY!!”
When that person said in the Splatoon 3 direct “witness the finale of the Splatoon Saga” she meant the finale of the trilogy set up from Splatoon 1, the story of the New Squidbeak Splatoon vs the Octarians. The Splatoon games up until this point have always had a consistent throughline of developing the Octarians and giving more insight into the conflict between them and the Inklings. Octo Expansion was about diving deeper into the Octolings, them reaching the surface and living with the Inklings. In Splatoon 3, it seems like the Inklings have accepted the Octolings and are living peacefully alongside them. (Or they are just really dumb and still don't realize that Octolings aren't just Inklings with weird hairstyles.)
Splatoon 3 ROTM marks the finale of the New Squidbeak Splatoon vs Octarians storyline as DJ Octavio’s entire army literally got turned into mindless furries and he became allies with the New Squidbeak Splatoon at the end of the game. Whether he’ll stay as a good guy remains to be seen but by judging Smollusk’s dialogue in Side Order where he says that Octavio is just flying around in his new machine nowadays, he’s probably gonna stay at the very least neutral to the Squidbeak Splatoon. His mission to save his race is basically over now, Octolings are living on the surface and his army is a bunch of furries. We will most likely never see the Octarians as enemies ever again in the series and the developers will move on to different threats never seen before and start a new storyline, or maybe they’ll focus on the Salmonids for Splatoon 4 but we’ll have to wait and see.
Now I wanna roll back to the Squid Sisters, listen, aside from the Inklings, Callie and Marie are the most iconic characters in the entire franchise. If you tell a random person “do you know Splatoon?” They are probably gonna think of the Inklings, the unique gameplay and then the Squid Sisters. The only other characters that rivals their popularity are arguably Off the Hook, Deep Cut are still recognizable but they aren’t on the same level of popularity as those two groups in my opinion.
It would genuinely be a bad financial and story mistake to never ever bring back Callie and Marie for Splatoon 4 and onwards, they are extremely iconic and profitable characters that people LOVE and wanna see more and continue having brand new adventures. Now, do I think they are gonna have the same role as before? No, I think they may take a break or step back from the Squidbeak Splatoon and let Captain 3 take control over Agent 4, Neo Agent 3, etc.
For Splatoon 4, I am guessing they are still gonna perform as the Squid Sisters, but in the main story mode or dlc I'm hoping that the developers take an Octo Expansion/Side Order route with the Squid Sisters where you get to hang out with them and learn more about them. How are they doing currently? What was it like for them at the start of their careers? Some more info about how they were as kids? How do Callie and Marie look back on the events of Splatoon 2? How do they feel about the other Idols and characters?
There’s still so much left for these girls and just never seeing them again after Splatoon 3 would be a massive mistake and destroy all that interesting potential and lore.
Also, the way that the Splatoon world works is that it’s an ever evolving world that follows our time, meaning that the characters age and go on new journeys as the years go by in our world. We see updates on past characters and are shown where they are at, the only times when that doesn't happen is when a character is fucking dead (Commander Tartar and the Octoweapons except for Octostomp) or they are in a location that isn’t the focus of what the writers wanna tell (C.Q. Cumber), heck even a character like Iso Padre who was a small side character in Octo Expansion managed to make an appearance in Splatoon 3 and show that he actually made it to the surface!
Callie and Marie are not going anywhere, you can rest easy. The credits song "Wave Goodbye" is not called that in Japanese, it's called "Star of the Sea Breeze" and we all know that the localization team can make some pretty bad mistakes....
#splatoon#splatoon 3#callie cuttlefish#callie splatoon#marie cuttlefish#marie splatoon#squid sisters#new squidbeak splatoon#dj octavio#octoling#octo expansion#side order
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if any of you know of any genuinely good slavic paganism discord servers, I’d love to hear. I have been joining some and have been throughly disappointed and uncomfortable with a lot of the members. And the racism doesn’t help…
#dragonis.txt#I would really love a community to grow in#but it’s hard. Very hard.#especially since I am genuinely getting closer to my Maya side! Idk! They’re just always weird about race!#slavic polytheism#slavic paganism
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Felt a bit nostalgic watching RT shut down…Here are the og faves again for old times sake 💙
#rvb#agent washington#agent Carolina#lavernius tucker#michael j caboose#epsilon#my art rvb#ahhh a lot of feelings…of course I stepped away from rt as a company a long time ago#but RvB is special to me!! it was my first fandom experience ever#and the community here on tumblr specifically was so instrumental to me growing up#I really could not have asked for a better community of artists and writers to grow up in. I know it sounds like platitudes when I say#that everyone was super nice and talented but REALLY. People were so kind to me and somehow I became well known despite#my art and writing and me in general still being immature and hashtag cringe#I found my creative legs and#people would respond to my stuff with walls and walls of support in the tags and we would do exchanges and events every year#I made my first lyric comic and it’s still doing extremely well on YouTube even today!! my dad who passed away recently always loved it#and my favorite RvB writer came out of hibernation to write me a bunch of text wall asks about it#I’ve never had another fandom experience quite like RvB#I still keep in touch with many of my friends from that time period even though we’ve all moved on the other things#these guys will always always have a place in my heart#so long reds and blues….
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The Start of the Truth [End of season 1]
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan jingyi#lan sizhui#a-qing#xiao xingchen#tulu xuanwu#And that's the end of season 1! 70 + (6 bonus) comics since I set out on this quest....and I would do it again B*)#I really wanted to push myself for this comic and make something pretty to really cap off this journey.#Art is actually very fun I love having a vision and making it into physical reality! Everyday I get a little better! Yippeee!#I never imagined I would have the kind of support I currently do as I've been making these comics#Hard to imagine I thought art was something I wouldn't have a shot at. Much less have the opportunity to have a community behind me#I want to keep growing and improving! I appreciate every single comment and tag and encouraging message!#I have a *fanart* folder. The me from a year ago could have never thought that could be a thing#Just...wow....thank you all so much for everything. I mean it more than I can put into words B'*)
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impaled
#nathan being impaled on that tetanus inducing loose steel pipe. tho tetanus is the least of his worries on account of. well u know 🕳#nathan can be a body horror fans best friend if u let him into ur heart. living human crash dummy#i really cant believe he gets impaled. twice.#hole moment!#love turning nathans immortality round in my head. but healing factor....?#thinkin today about how the video game guy tim threatens to cut one of them in half with a chainsaw and simon is like:#[😐nathan u obviously have to volunteer]#but what woulda actually happened if that followed through [probably why it didnt lol]#would the others have had to drag each severed bit of him back to the community centre and let his guts re fuse#fucking hold him together with gaffer tape and plasters. cause i doubt he coulda regrown a whole half#his 'healing factor' only comes into play when he dies. fresh canvas etch a sketch reboot and all that. hes not fuckin wolverine#all the deaths r: impaled on fence. impaled on pipe. beaten to death. blows his own brains out. falls and snaps his neck#but chainsaw... ? one can ponder. fingers to head i can imagine anything image#readin his wiki rn 'his body will never get sick. rot. age. or truly grow old'#may not get sick but he can still shit his guts out. hashtag oblivious lactose intolerant king hashtag milk drinker#forever the worlds most annoying twenty yr old#and then the wiki goes 'the user does not need to eat drink or breathe' ....hello#ive rotated him not aging any further cause it lines up with the whole stuck in his ways. never changing [kelly voice: its just who u are]#but eatin and drinking and breathing??? we know he still experiences hunger [<-kebab]#and he dunks his head in a bucket of water when hes testin for powers with simon. gaspin for air afterwards right#firm believer in the. he suffocated to death several times in the coffin before they dug him up#oh waaait. is it stating this like. he doesnt need foodwaterair. cause it doesnt matter if he dies.. ohhhhhh..... Oh..😃#staring at nathan sleeping in the community centre surviving on bags of crisps from the vendies so hard i burn holes through my monitor#this got away from me. uh. living crash dummy. oil pastel guts and water colour jumpsuit yessir#having fun doin art. expect more hole art. sorryfor putting this in the misfits tag hehe. not really#gore#blood#misfits#my art#chewtoy
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7-3 is freaking me the fuck out but the blood trees are so cool. theyre so pleasant. a beacon of joy in the hellscape that is the dark in a game that has already proven its willingness to scare the shit out of me
#ramblings#ultrakill#im watching it on yt not actually playing yet#this probably sounds insane to normal people bit i think the ultrakill community understands.#something really beautiful about. after all the destruction and death youve caused. you make trees grow#but also the trees are just beautiful im a huge fan#first impressions of violence now act 3 is out would be uhh. so much fear and also 'ooh blood trees thats neat'#then again. 1-1 freaked me out at first. 4-3 did. and i now love them. so its just. the newness of it all#im SCARED of what may happen in layer 9 i dont want to see it i dont want to know how the fuck do you bring the story of a game like THIS#to an end. come on#ultrakill spoilers#act 3 spoilers
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i feel like im having a lot of delayed realizations on account of being suicidal for the majority of my life and now not being suicidal like. idk thinking about what life is now that im actively choosing to be alive. i used to be like scared of everyone i love dying but its like. death and grief are a part of life... and grief is like hard but also to even have something to grieve is worth something.
#I HATE HOW GOOD THAT WANDAVISION QUOTE IS#GRIEF REALLY IS LOVE PERSISTING.......................#but anyways as i get better at distress tolerance and feelings#im coming to terms with the fact that grief is a part of life#wow growing up is so hard and i really truly didnt ever think i would do it#when i was at my great uncles funeral. at the cemetary#i couldnt stop thinking about gaza#im too angry and sad to say anything eloquent about it#except that i think i want to do some sort of memorial in nyc to have space to grieve#especially because the constant violence robs people of the ability to even properly mourn their dead#it feels like the least i can do to make a space for the palestinian community in nyc#i also think theres a lot of survivors guilt and i want to make a space where people can confront that as well#i think doomscrolling is in some ways a manifestation of survivors guilt#i think about palestinians i know who checked for their name in the death records#i really lost focus here huh#i forgot to pack my journal#i also need to get my ticket home lol oops lol i am quite stressed about it actuallt
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What up I'm married to a tall person who is basically Milo Thatch but agender, and uhhh, basically, yeah, everyone should be jealous and I LOVE MY CUTE TWINK NERD WIFE!!!!! 😤😤🥰🥰🥰❤❤❤👌👌
#original#i love my wife#had a big crush on that character growing up#you know who else is really into her? EVERY OTHER CHUBBY TRANS GUY IN CHICAGO apparently we just see her and are like OH HELL YEAH#do you know why this is? it is because we have excellent taste that is why.#and also we want non threatening masc people to be into us and respect our gender! that's me anyway#and this is excellent news for her anyway bc we're in an open relationship & she thinks guys like me (her HUSBAND 🥰😁) are incredibly hot#this is also bc she has excellent taste.#but it is a running joke that she keeps getting nice OKC matches that look a lot like me 😂#anyway this post is a thing that would have made young me BOIL with envy if someone else said it but in fact it is ME#and young me grew into me and is in here like AAWWWWWWW YYYEEEEEEEEAAAHHHHH 🤘🤘🤘🤘🚀🚀🚀#she doesn't just look like Milo she also moves and emotes and talks like him. and until recently her glasses would not stay on her face!#she got new ones. nerd. i adore her.#she is so kind to Jack (me) and to my giant anxious pitbull child#she puts his blankie on him as he rests on her toes to make sure she doesn't go anywhere 😭😭❤#she is my best friend and she never makes me feel stupid or fake or undeserving. she just likes me so much and she fkn acts like it!#and we have good boundaries and communication in a very autistic way [positive] and she is so smart and funnyyy#oh i am falling asleep now#probably has something to do with how thinking about my wife makes me feel safe and warm or some gay shit like that 🙄 ;)#edit: omg it just occurred to me that she is like 80% Mill and 20% Jessica Jones. just in terms of like. vibes. XD#she cares a lot about Jessica Jones. I will tell her my findings in the morrow#*80% Milo
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Although it is true that some actors just do BL to make easy money and fame, it's actually really funny to see people blaming mostly the actors from the oldest BLs of that, you know the BLs from the time where the budget was so small that it looked like a high school student video project
#i mean yeah they don't personally have the best atitudes#but they accept to make gay character when there was mostly almost nothing ti gain from it#not forgiving homophobic remarks#but also i see that a lot of these actor grow and learned more about the community#sotus#make it right#puppy honey#dark blue kiss#together with me#offgun#love sick#and yeah i do understand the acting was kinda off and many moments because not all actor seemed comfortable?#feel free to disagree with me#2moons#i would say mostly starting from 2017/2018 it was really that lucrative#people saw how much money and success previous actors got#2017 2018 2019 and 2020 you have more actors that used bl as step stone and then never again#now the last years that we are seeing people sticking to bl and even famous actors doind some bl or another
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.
#will probably delete this later but I needed to get it out somewhere#like I am so goddamn lonely. and it is making me feel LITERALLY as if I'm about to descend into genuine madness#but the PROBLEM is that. in order to not be lonely. you need to find other people. and you need to have reason to believe that those#people will keep wanting and making an effort to communicate with you#and the thing is THE THING. IS. that you cannot control what people do or feel. I have no say in what people think of me.#I have to rely on other people to build new relationships. and that is just not. something that I can do.#it's not something that makes SENSE for me to do anymore. so I try to figure out how to just not want human connection at all#you know maybe if I intentionally isolate myself or grow my cynicism on a regular basis I'll get desensitized to the point#where that's just genuinely not something I want anymore. so then I'm not lonely but I also didn't have to rely on anyone else being#trustworthy and accepting and willing to care about me to get to that point#but. I mean maybe some people can do the denial thing but I can't. I've been trying for years. and that carved-out-hole in my chest#hasn't gotten any better. it hasn't filled up or healed over or gone away. it's just gotten bigger.#but if you're genuinely convinced that you're just built in a way where no one is ever going to really love you...what the fuck do you do?#if connecting with other people is something I want but it's (in my probably-biased estimation) completely inaccessible because I am#an inherently shameful and unpleasant person just by virtue of existing...then I'm just stuck at an impasse. and I'll always be crying#over something I can't logically ever have. why bother pursuing it if I am just going to be rejected or hurt or disparaged or tossed out or#neglected or sidelined or any number of bad outcomes? if that's how pursuing any kind of new interpersonal relationships is going to end#then why bother? the only thing to do would be to learn how to be completely unreliant on other people in any way forever right?#but THAT'S not logistically feasible EITHER and I've already proven that I can't fucking do that so what's left? just always be miserable?#I DON'T WANT TO RESIGN MYSELF TO THAT!!!!#sorry. it's. getting to be late december & around the new year is when it always gets Bad™ so we're just. gonna be like this for a few week#In the Vents#ugh all of this would be better if I still lived near Best Friend™#anyone who gets to live near/with their Person™ PLEASE know how lucky you are and don't take that for granted
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@beatingheart-bride
It should be a given, she said. It should be a given.
But it wasn't, was it? Both Randall and Elizabeth knew that all too well. It should be a given, Emily and Dorian were both right in that regard...but unfortunately, that just wasn't a guarantee.
Which was why it was so genuinely surprising, so genuinely touching, when someone did treat them like human beings, not just like mere laborers who should be grateful they were given such jobs that made them "useful" at best, or scum of the Earth that should be seldom seen and heard even less so at worst. They shouldn't have to be surprised by the kindness of their fellow man (least of all from the very people they planned to wed), and they knew it...
…but they were just the same.
Still, both of them tried to put these less-than-happy musings out of their minds as Elizabeth let Dorian hold her close, her heart soaring at the sensation of his arms around her waist, as Randall gave Emily a long and tender kiss, his heart skipping a beat at the touch of her lips against his, both of them silently thanking the heavens for these two wonderful lovers, who blessed their lives the way they did, who made their worlds a merrier place to live, even when it didn't seem so.
And provided the plan continued to go off without a hitch, it could be a merry life they could truly share, both Elizabeth and Randall silently promising to makes the lives of Dorian and Emily as joyous and wonderful as they made theirs.
#((i know! past efforts to have a long-running rp blog had kinda fallen through))#((and i guess i assumed this blog would be no different...but then i was proven wrong ultimately))#((and i'm glad for it! i love this fandom; this rp community; and this character))#((who i'm so proud to have seen grow and evolve over the years since i've started this blog))#((and i can't wait to see how he continues to grow and evolve from here on out))#((as i've got no plans to stop anytime soon either!))#((and they really do compliment one another! they may come from different walks of life))#((different classes; different experiences; and so people might assume they have nothing in common))#((they don't see how they could be an item; but after talking to them; seeing them together))#((there's really no great mystery to it; they love each other!))#((they love each other; they make each other happy; they are kindred spirits))#((again; there's no great mystery to it at all; it's just true; deep; unabashed love!))#outofhatboxes#beatingheart-bride#V:Days of Future Past
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