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#I will not check punctuation
ubejamjar · 28 days
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List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you! get to know your mutuals and followers (ू•‧̫•ू⑅)♡
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4
Yay! More happy things! Thank you much 💕 I got carried away talking about fish so 6. is long but the rest are brief!
6. Arapaima
My favorite fish (not for eating). Big ol’ oxbow lake babies who have to come up for air after 5-15 minutes, it’s why they survive in waters with little oxygen. I love them so much.
Imagine—Deep in the rainforest there’s a lake, one of many born of the floodwaters spilling forth from the Amazon River. The water is still, tranquil amongst the chirping, buzzing, rustling of forest life. A black caiman lurks, drifting across the mirrored surface, prowling for any aquatic life unlucky enough to be stranded here when the floodwater receded.
Something breaches. You wait for another glimpse. Your is patience rewarded with the sight of a beast below, a massive thing nearly 3 meters, ten foot. You see giant scales, dragon scales in green and black, glittering gold in the light. There’s a flash of red tail. The creature is gone.
They ARE in FFXIV but the biggest aquarium is not big enough for them and I would just feel sad seeing one floating in place. Same goes for Animal Crossing.
7. Sugar and Coffee
I’m a tea and croissant type of woman but sometimes I’m a little dessert devil fiending for any sweet. Whenever I want to have something like cake, I need to have a cup of coffee to balance it. Usually decaf because I’m not supposed to have much caffeine, but always a dark roast with a little bit of oat milk or heavy cream to take the acidic edge off. It’s bliss
8. Vaccuming
Ok wait, hear me out.
It is a necessity because I’m allergic to cats and I have two whole idiots to my name, but also it’s just satisfying. Usually I’m just mentally making the same sound as vacuum cleaner or making little race car noises when I go around the couch.
9. Crustaceans
It started as a joke. I was playing Civ VI with my siblings and husband, and I started the church of Crab God 🦀. It was all “haha holy war, Catholicism vs. a bunch of crab worshipping idiots” but then it became an inside joke that never died. Now I unironically love the lil guys. My baby baby sister got me a little crab Lego thing for Christmas, my darling got me a crab plush for our anniversary last year. 🤷‍♀️ I just think they’re cute, silly little guys.
10. Eels
I’m just gonna finish this by talking about another aquatic creature I’m fucking obsessed with. I saw ONE documentary about endangered American eels a decade ago and I’ve been obsessed ever since. Freshwater eel, Moray eels, DEFINITELY garden eels. Eels good, man.
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Same, brother, same
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forgettable-au · 5 months
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Sans do you ever feel that something might be missing?
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Maybe he felt like that at some point, maybe for a long time. In the present, I think he's made some kind of peace with it.
Also, I really like the ask blog format, but I don't really mean this to be an ask blog.
So when writing questions, try to refer them to me instead of the characters. That way, they don't have to break the fourth wall lmao. I really wanted to answer this one tho
-
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neproxrezi · 9 months
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someone else could write it better than me but i love how the fucked up nasty shit you can make harry do/say/be in disco elysium isn't just like, random stuff caused simply by the player having free will and control over him but they're parts of who he is and who he has been
you're not a tabula rasa. you're a sudden shock of blank pages in a big, aged, damaged book and sometimes the paper you're trying to write a better man on is torn and you see something through the gaps nobody needed to see ever again. and it's just there now again, back to the surface
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is-the-post-reliable · 8 months
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https://www.tumblr.com/john-tendrils-exclam-the-eighth/728391524817207296/faqs?source=share is it true? are you one of them?
I couldn't say, on account of not knowing who any of these people are
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jacks347 · 2 months
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Do you think Darlin ever misses Quinn?
Do you think they hate themself for it?
Because regardless of all the shit he put them through, Darlin still loved him at one point.
There was a time where Quinn was their safe space. Their home. Their comfort.
There was a time when being with the pack was more pain than it was worth so being with Quinn's band of misfits was a release.
There was a time when Darlin believed Quinn loved them too. And hey, maybe he did. We'll never know.
There were good times. There were happy points. We know Darlin has long since ripped off the rose colored glasses but do you think they ever think back on those times and wonder if any of it was real?
Do you think they hate themself more every time they remember it? They know the kind of person Quinn really is, they're in a better situation that they never would've dreamed of before, so why do they keep remembering? The disgust and guilt is so strong they want to puke.
They know they shouldn't beat themself up over remembering, they know Quinn tricked them, they know it wasn't their fault.
But scars etch themselves on the heart. The heart that loved him. The heart that doesn't understand what it did wrong to make him hurt them. The heart that wonders if it was their fault. That all of it was their fault.
"I hate him. I hate him. But I loved him too."
It's one of those trauma topics that Darlin shoves down as far as they can with the rest of the complicated feelings they have about the Quinn situation so they don't have to think about it.
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treemaidengeek · 2 months
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Hey, fellow spoonies! Got a min for a bit of writing that has absolutely transformed my relationship to my chronic illness?
This is from Mindfulness Meditation for Pain Relief by Jon Kabat-Zinn, based on his experiences co-running (?) a clinic specifically for people with severe unmanageable chronic illness & chronic pain. Part of the book is exercises, which weren't hugely impactful for me. But this section I've listened to over and over. It's been a game changer for me. Maybe it'll help you too.
Below the cut bc it's long.
"First, a working definition of mindfulness so we know what we're talking about when we use that word. You can think of mindfulness as pure awareness. In particular, the awareness that arises from paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, without judgment or reaction, to whatever appears in the field of your experience.
You already have awareness. It’s as much a part of being human as our capacity for thinking or for breathing. So you can always ask yourself in any moment: is my awareness of pain, in pain? and then take a look and see. You can also expand this line of investigation to ask yourself, is my awareness of fear afraid? Is my awareness of anger, angry? Is my awareness of sadness, sad? Very revealing and liberating exploration, as we shall experience firsthand.
Of course being non-judgmental and non-reactive sounds like an ideal. But it isn't, really, not in the way we’re talking about it. It's a way of being in relationship to experience, a commitment to--as best we can–suspend our judging for a time, and suspend believing in our judgements as being true.
Of course, we judge everything, and tend to react automatically whenever things are not to our liking. And we can be very emotionally reactive, especially when we're hurting. So as we shall see further on, and in the practices themselves, we just observe the judging and reacting when they arise, and–as best we can–refrain from judging our judging, or reacting to our reactions.
A number of principles, attitudes, and perspectives are important to keep in mind when cultivating a mindful approach to working with chronic pain conditions or any other distressing elements in your life.
Here are seven that are fundamental and bear revisiting and keeping in mind, and listening to again and again, just as with the meditation practices. We will be making use of them every day, and even moment by moment throughout the day.
1. As we said, as long as you’re breathing there is really more right with you than wrong, no matter what is wrong. And our work will involve mobilizing those interior resources of your own inner landscape, of your body and mind, to work for you to improve the quality of your day-to-day and moment-to-moment life.
2. One of those interior resources is the power of the present moment. The power of “now” is enormous, yet mostly we persist in living in the past or in the future, in memory or in constant anticipation, worry, and planning, most of the time. And we never realize and never recognize how powerful and healing it can be to inhabit this moment, the only one we are ever alive in.
So strange as it may sound, it turns out it is very challenging to actually live in the present moment, even though it's the only time we ever really have to do anything: for learning, for growing, for coming to terms with things as they are, for expressing our affection and appreciation for others, for loving. All this takes ongoing practice.
3. Of course we are happy to show up more in the present moment as long as it's exactly to our liking. But it usually isn't anywhere near as good or as pleasant as we would wish it to be. That is true even if we don't have a chronic pain condition that we could see as the cause of all our troubles.
Have you noticed how easy it is to always want things to be different from how they actually are?
We certainly don't want to inhabit the present moment if we don't like it, and we certainly don't like it if we are in significant pain. So we can easily get caught up in trying to distract ourselves and escape from the present moment because it's not to our liking.
4. Our usual options when faced with situations we don't like and wouldn't want anyone to suffer from, are twofold. As we just saw, we can turn away from them and try to ignore them or escape from them as best we can. Or alternatively, we can get caught up in obsessing about our troubles endlessly and feel victimized.
Either way we might (as so many people do) turn to familiar resources at our disposal to dull the pain, such as alcohol or drugs, or food or TV, even if those coping strategies don't work, are addictive, or have terrible consequences that may make our lives worse in the long run.
We might also get into the habit of being irritable, gruff, and angry a good deal of the time, out of our own pain and frustration. Or emotionally withdrawn from others and from life, distant, cut off, in a state of perpetual contraction of both body and mind.
None of these coping strategies make for much happiness and ease of being. Grinning and bearing it isn't much fun. And blaming all our troubles on the pain doesn't actually make anything any better, as we usually come to see at some point or other. This can just further compound our frustration and even despair.
5. There is a third way of dealing with painful experiences, a way of being rather than perpetual doing and forcing. One that involves neither turning away from painful experiences, nor becoming overwhelmed by them. That third way is the way of mindfulness, the way of opening to and befriending our experience, however strange that may sound.
We do this by turning toward what we most fear to feel and opening gradually, over time, and only to the degree that you choose, to the full range of our experiences in any given moment, even when what we are experiencing is highly unpleasant, aversive, and unwanted.
You could think of it as putting out the welcome mat for what is happening. Because whatever it is, it is happening already. Any attempt to turn away is really a denying of your situation, which doesn't help much. And succumbing to resignation, a sense of being defeated, or to depression or perhaps even self-pity will clearly only make matters worse. If we take the turning-away route, we will be turning away from the opportunity to learn from what the pain has to teach us.
If we take the turning-away route, even though it may seem simpler when we are in a depressed mind-state, we may never find openings, new possibilities, new beginnings, new ways of being that are available to us right inside our own circumstances and our own mind and body. We might not discover that we can become stronger and more flexible in the face of whatever it is that we are dealing with, discover new options for relating to what we are carrying – which is the root meaning in Latin of the word “to suffer.” The approach of mindfulness, of turning-toward and opening to our experience – even when it is difficult – can readily lead to new ways of seeing including new possibilities for coming to terms with our situation in the moment, whether we like it or not, whether we want it or not.
This is called resilience, an interior strength we can cultivate through practice. A way to live, and live well, with what life offers up for us: “the full catastrophe,” as Zorba the Greek called it – the human condition itself.
6. This path of mindfulness involves learning to open to experience moment by moment with kindness and compassion towards oneself, whether what you are experiencing in any given moment is pleasant, unpleasant, or neither pleasant nor unpleasant. And without judging the experience as good if we like it, bad if we don't like it, and boring if we don't have any particular feeling one way or another.
As we said earlier, that doesn’t mean we won’t be judging plenty. But we can form the intention to suspend our hair-trigger tendency to judge everything according to whether we like it or not, and also our tendency to react emotionally and fairly automatically in a similar way : with acquisitiveness, even greediness, if we like it and therefore always want it to last or want more of it; and with rejection, anger, hatred, or disappointment if we don’t like it and want it to go away.
So non-judging and emotional balance in the face of challenging circumstances will be factors we can cultivate in working mindfully with our moment-to-moment experience–not as ideals we try to impose on ourselves or strive to grab hold of, but as potentials already within ourselves that we can learn to recognize and bring into greater awareness when they do arise.
Over time and with practice, we may find that being less emotionally reactive and less harshly judgemental, and kinder and more accepting of ourselves and our moments–however they may be–becomes more and more our default setting, rather than anger, resentment, fear, self-loathing, and contraction in both the mind and the body. And since these kinds of contractions of mind and body usually increase the intensity of our pain, they just compound our misery and suffering. This is one easy way we can exert significant positive influence over our pain.
7. None of this has to do with making anything go away. We’re not trying to suppress our pain or “control” it, or suppress our emotional state. We’re not trying to fix anything at all–even though we may want to, or feel helpless and resentful that medicine cannot fix what we feel is the matter. On the contrary, we are just looking for a place to sit or to stand, a momentary refuge within which we can contemplate the present moment, and perhaps discover some respite right in the middle of things as they are, however they are. Amazingly, this stance of what I often call non-doing or just being can very quickly lead to things changing–since things are always changing, even our pain and our relationship to it.
But sometimes if we are too stuck in our thought-habits, in the same old ruts regarding our condition, desperate to get somewhere else or fix something you think might be broken, or else make it go away, our very desire and fixation may lead to its just staying around longer, as if we were actually feeding those energies, as if we ourselves are locking ourselves in and preventing our world from changing. The world and our bodies are always changing. That is a natural law: the law of impermanence. Everything changes. Why would we be an exception? So sometimes patience and forbearance may be called for, and good strategies for allowing things to change and even heal on their own."
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spiritofjustice · 17 days
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unemployed (baby)
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euphoricfilter · 3 months
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Just so u know you're missing some punctuation here and there in your fics
just so you know, i’m actually fully aware 😧
i will argue that some of the run on sentences are mild stylistic choice. but still, this isn’t professional writing and i doubt it’ll change any time soon
but if it bothers people too much i’ll proof read twice from now on and check my punctuation 🧍🏻‍♀️
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Lmao don't tell the show darklinas this coz they're all OBSESSED with dad darkling 😭 at one point show Darkling and Alina (or how show fans write them) look completely different characters when compared to their book counterparts.
Re: this ask
Oh yeah, I think they’re fully different characters beyond the most superficial similarities in plot important choices and motivations.
First of all the show made everything so generically and stereotypically gendered? Alina is sanded down dramatically. She’s meek and quiet, we see her primarily spending her time sketching or reading in the library for fun. Those are traits book!Alina has too, but the show makes them more prominent and we never see her be mean, grumpy or snarky. They try to make her more superficially active in the story, but she delicately faints away during the climactic sequence of season one and has Mal fight her battle. It frankly drives me insane that the show runners (and JML…) talk about book Alina not having a personality and that they had to fabricate one for her when her characterization in the show is the blandest and most generic thing possible.
Meanwhile the Darkling is just a completely different guy yeah. He’s also stereotypically gruffer and angrier? We see him raise his voice a lot. The kefta design is a glorified coat. I don’t know they just put so much effort into make him look and seem rougher around the edges in a distinctly masculine coded way. Which is not what I signed up for! I’m here for a melodramatic vampire twink who announces his presence anywhere with a smoke machine and billows of glitter.
He’s also just… more normal and in touch with his feelings. I’ve complained about this a lot but him telling her to call him Aleksander on like day two is such a perfect microcosm for the differences of the character. Show!Darkling has no reason to hide his name, he’s not a shriveled enough husk of a person for that to feel like a vulnerability. He’s in touch with his feelings! He’s Just Some Guy.
I’m in the minority where I reasonably liked both their characterizations in season two. Alina.. just… barely got anything. But her scenes were fun. The Darkling finally got some cartoon villainy going on, and giving him victorian wasting disease was truly an inspired choice! I didn’t enjoy the nichevo’ya being out of his control, it felt like part of a general move to woobify him. But eh I think it was better than season one, like at least it was entertaining and making choices vs leaning on generic traits.
But yeah that is all to say, they’re both completely different. And I have a chip on my shoulder about it because the book characterizations are so much better!
TLDR show people are wrong!
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crazysandwichlady2p04 · 4 months
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War in the stars
Part 1
Loud sirens and red flashings lights as a entire ship of crew ran to their assigned posts and you essentially ran the fastest weaving through your crew up to your high seat above the pilot to navigate him through the enemy ships or to direct your gun controls to hit vital part's of the ships shoot back at your, The lady in black, or better known as the largest ship on Earth's defence sometimes named after you, the widow.
"What's our status, Eagle" (Widow/captain: the lady in blacks Captain) your voice is demanding as you stand infront of the screen situated on a platform so you could have a clear view of the massive window in the front of the ship. "Smooth sailing as usual Captain" (Eagle: The lady in blacks head pilot) his voice is strained as he focuses on directing the massive ship through gun fire and other ships. "I want us out of this fire!" You demand and climbed back down your platform and grabbed a modified gun made to withstand the pressure and conditions of space. "we did come this far to be shot down! I want my gunman's to shoot down anything aiming at us!" You stand behind Eagle as the glorious sight of earth comes into sight. "They need us back home before they start a war that's not theirs to fight".
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》 <- what is this
double angle bracket?
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shanti-ashant-hai · 1 year
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why is my brother is such a good fkn mood today he came back home at 12 last night looking all pleased with himself and got yelled at by mumma hows he so happy what happened yesterday
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ubejamjar · 30 days
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List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you! get to know your mutuals and followers (ू•‧̫•ू⑅)♡
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4
@gatheredfates Thank you for sending this to me ♡ 1. Autumn
It’s the anticipation of a new semester as the leaves change from green to gold and red. It’s the season of pumpkins, apple cider donuts, running through a corn maze— sometimes beneath a blue sky, sometimes in the dark. It’s the sugar high of Halloween night that reminds me of childhood. It’s the season I fell in love with a boy who loved heavy metal and hated classical literature but recited “To Be or Not to Be” in its entirety because he knew I loved Shakespeare.
2. London Fogs
My favorite drink— earl grey tea, bitter black with a hint of citrusy bergamot, sweetened with vanilla syrup (sometimes a touch of lavender) and steamed milk. The best mornings are the quiet ones just before sunrise, spent listening to rainfall with an owl mug nestled in my hands, the London fog steeping warmth into my fingers; a blanket over my lap; and the knowing there’s nowhere I need be but here.
3. Ink and Paper
When I draw with pencils, the knowledge that I can take it back stalls the process. I'll erase over and over and over again chasing a perfect line or curve that's never going to be as perfect. Ink forces me to slow down, to really think about what I see and how to translate that into lines. Ink demands that I am sure and even if I'm not, I press forward because every misplaced line is a lesson learned for next time.
4. Smiles
I'm always smiling because I love when a stranger smiles back. I don't know you and you don't know me; given the opportunity we might be friends or we might hate each other. In this moment, we made each other smile and that must be some kind of magic.
5. My Darling
In eight years we’ve been through a lot together. We’ve been so poor we counted every dollar before we spent it at the Dollar Tree, that a luxury was a single frozen, chocolate banana we split together on a hot summer afternoon. We sat at bus stops in the cold together with when our car was spirited away. The good times are endless: love that sprouted the day we met; holding hands while we explored downtown; laughing, running in the rain into the arms of a local coffee shop where he had his first Irish coffee and the owner gave us the last of the pastries before he closed for the night. There's more I want to say, but I'll spare him the embarrassment of expressing my sappy adoration on the internet.
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tinycatstars · 9 months
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absolutely love how u can tell which of my fic outlines were written by big me and small me lololol
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rosyjuly · 1 year
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I know you didn’t write the after break up Alex fic in Prince George AU but I really like your George pieces, do you have any Alex thoughts angsty or otherwise from this universe that you felt like sharing?
YES and as always i discussed this with my legally wedded wife @prettydangrotten and we circled back to winter wonderland alex...
winter wonderland is this horribly overpriced and overcrowded fair in hyde park; it's also incredibly fun. alex goes with his friends - charles lets pierre hold his hand because he's "cold" and because pierre has finally slept with the older man who got them tickets to the PL game and he's horribly jealous. naomi (alex's coworker from gabby's brilliant installment) and her partner is also there - alex feels a bit weird, tagging along alone, but they're good fun; he's missed spending time with them. he hasn't been to winter wonderland in a few years.
his eyes keep catching on their joint hands and he keeps thinking of george - george, who couldn't even come anyway because it's too much of a security risk with the crowd, let alone get on the stupid rides with alex so he can clutch on his hand when it gets scary. but he can't stop thinking of how george would lend him his gloves and try to rub some warmth back into alex's icy fingers: cupping them against his mouth to breath hot against them.
and worst is, charles keep saying that they'll hook him up with someone. pierre makes an offhand comment about keeping his eyes open, maybe he'll see someone worth his while. and alex is like yeah guys, you're right. but he doesn't want anyone else in that moment, no matter how many dates he's been on since he and george--
Pierre and Charles groping each other all night -- which Alex couldn’t have done, ever; even if they could be in public together.
and when they're debating what to eat, alex thinks about how george'd insist to get them both bratwurst, stay in the queue with jenson while he makes alex sit down with charles, close to a heat lamp ): they'd share the stupidly big portion of churros so alex wouldn't feel like dying after wolfing it down alone :(
how he'd give george a soft chaste kiss as thanks for bringing him the mulled wine he didn't even say he wanted, only looked at the vendor for too long, and george immediately going to join the queue-
“George, seriously you don’t have to,”
“Just wait!” George would laugh, “I’ll be right back, stay here with the heater.”
Except it’s all just - pretend. Alex doesn’t know what George is like in the real world.
(He tells himself when in fact he knows George more earnestly and better than anyone in the whole world.)
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dullahandyke · 4 months
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nothing like a typing test to lift the spirits
#i might still not have the fucking essay half done but i just scored 118wpm qwerty on monkeytype 30 second test with 96%acc#^ btw typing tests r mostly bullshit and theyre not an accurate measure of how fast u type in practice#they often include only common/basic words and lack both punctuation and coherant word patterns#additionally it only measures how quickly you can replicate written word#when i know that personally a lot of the drag on my typing speed is composing sentences in my head or processing audio#like using stenography methods a lot of people reach speeds of 220+wpm (the average speed a person talks)#but even if i learned plover (something i have all the equipment to do but i havent sat down n done yet)#i doubt id be able to become a court stenographer or other such thing bcos of how autism slows down my audio processing#so i would need to attend to That and improve it greatly and i do not know if that is possible#and also like i have no urgent need to transcribe real-time dialogue its just an interest thing#but yknow!#anywho i probs need to practice dvorak more and get good at that before i crack into stenography#last i checked i was like 23wpm without reference if i attempted accuracy (using a typing test with punctuation and sentence structure)#which is like. dogshit. but it wont get better if i dont practice ig#okkkk from now on im going dvorak mode except for schoolwork and im not allowed 2 get mad#ok there we go i switched over yay#i'm both better and worse than i expected#muscle memory is doing so much heavy lifting re: where letters n shit are#but its still a little agonising
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