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#I quote these in my head every now and then

fairy-writes · 2 days

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THE STORY OF US

Reblogs and Comments are greatly appreciated!!

__________________________________________________________________________

Fandom(s): Bungou Stray Dogs

Pairing(s): Dazai Osamu x Reader

Word Count: 4k (PLS READ, I’M BEGGING YOU)

Genre(s)/Tag(s): Pretty Heavy AU (idk what to call it tho), Female!Reader, Time Traveler!Reader, Time Traveler!Dazai, Reader is shorter than Dazai

Taglist: @underthetree845 | @nezuko-kamado-cute-demon

Notes: I don’t know what I’m doing

VERY HEAVILY RIVER SONG INSPIRED (find my quotes lol)

I might write part two from the Reader’s POV (don’t get your hopes up tho, I’m notoriously bad with writing part two to things, but if I get requests I’m more likely to do it!)

I just now realized that the title is also a Taylor Swift song, but I don’t wanna change it

Also, I’m just saying this now, this is not every scene I had in mind. A lot of scenes got cut for my sanity.

__________________________________________________________________________

Osamu first discovered he could time jump when he was eleven.

It had been an accident, really. Well, maybe not a complete accident. Osamu wanted to escape everything—his parents' arguing, their fights. But, of course, he had nowhere to go. As an eleven-year-old boy, there wasn’t anywhere that would hire him. He had no other family that wasn’t across the other side of the world.

He was completely and utterly alone.

The shouting was reaching its peak. Osamu shoved his pillow further over his head as if trying to suffocate himself as his mother screamed something at his father. Something about his lies.

Ha. If only she knew how much Osamu lied.

Lied about his day at school. (Anything to get her off his back.)

Lied about having friends. (Anything to make them not suspicious.)

Lied about everything.

The screaming grated on his ears through the pillow, and he ground his teeth until his mouth hurt.

Couldn’t they just shut up?

Couldn’t they just go away?

Suddenly, something was different. Osamu felt a tugging in his stomach. It was as if someone wrapped a string around his middle and yanked. Almost like he was being squeezed out of a tube of toothpaste.

And then he could hear… water? The sounds of a river that should not be audible even through the open window. Did they even live near a river?

Osamu peeked out from the pillow over his head and was blinded by sunlight. He sat up and realized his pajamas were covered in scalding hot sand. Golden sand stretched for miles and miles, a long twisting river just visible in the distance. On the horizon, he saw pyramids being erected high into the sky.

What the hell?

And the rest was quite literally history.

December 31st, 1925

New York City

The air was cold. Snow fell in flakes as Osamu watched the snow fall outside the bar, nursing a whiskey on the rocks as he paid no mind to anyone around him. He had aged since his first trip through time. Though he could never remember how old he was. He looked to be in his early twenties, but everyone looked so different in different time periods, so he could’ve been thirty, and that would’ve made sense.

“Mind if I sit?” Comes a sweet voice. He looks to his left and sees you.

You’re dressed to the nines in a silver slip flapper dress with black beads decorating the length of the gown. Your hair was cut in a neat bob, a feather headband decorating the up-do. The kohl around your eyes only accentuates the pretty color.

Osamu plasters a grin across his features, and you shift. He gestures grandly to the stool beside him,

“I could do with a gorgeous woman’s company.” He quips, and you laugh good-naturedly before sliding onto the stool beside him. He can feel your warmth through the woolen fabric of his suit coat, and he takes a sip of liquid courage, suddenly feeling somewhat hesitant to talk to you.

There was something about you. Like you knew all Osamu’s secrets already.

You lean your cheek on the palm of your hand, smiling with ruby-red lips and brilliant teeth that were ahead of their time.

That should’ve been his first clue.

“It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Where are we at now?” You muse, and he frowns as he sips at his whiskey. This was one of the only bars that still sold alcohol through the prohibition.

“Sorry, I’ve never seen you before in my life.” He says, and you cock your head, eyebrow raised, as you pick at the seams of your silken gloves. You abruptly stop picking and reach into your clutch purse that rested in your lap, pulling out a worn notebook he didn’t recognize. It was well-loved, with pictures stuffed in between the pages.

“So we haven’t done France yet?”

“France?” You lean back giddily and hold your notebook to your chest.

“What a night that was! Dancing in front of the Eiffel Tower? That ring a bell?” Osamu shakes his head.

He had yet to go to France. In all his time jumping, he hadn’t seen the point in going to France, much less the City of Love.

Now it was your turn to frown, flipping through your little notebook, and he spies neat handwriting in various languages. English. Japanese. German. Latin. And were those Egyptian hieroglyphs? All throughout the pages, he spies his picture scattered across the ink.

Just who were you?

And why do you have all those pictures and drawings of him?

“What about picnicking at Versailles?”

Another shake. Another page turned.

“The Titanic? What a messy time that was!”

“What is that?” He eventually asks, and you quickly flip it shut before he can actually read anything.

“Spoilers.” You say quickly, and when he arches an eyebrow, you sigh, call the bartender over, and order a glass of champagne. The two of you wait in silence until you get your drink. Eventually, you speak after you’ve downed half of your champagne flute. “It’s all of our adventures. Time travel gets complicated, doesn’t it?”

As soon as he connects the dots, Osamu is floored.

Another time traveler? He thought he was the only one!

It’s clear you pick up on what he is thinking because your face falls. You look heartbroken. As if he just ripped your heart out of your chest and smashed it into a million pieces. As if you were a lonesome star falling from the sky and drowning in the sea.

“You truly don’t have any idea who I am, do you?” Osamu shrugs,

“Who are you?”

Osamu didn’t know it was possible, but you looked even more upset. Tears welled up in your waterline and smudged your kohl as it dripped down your cheeks. You swallow thickly and sniffle, pulling a handkerchief from your clutch to dab at your watery eyes and ruined makeup.

For whatever reason, Osamu feels his heart ache.

“I suppose this was bound to happen sometime.” You say eventually, and he looks over at you from where he had just downed the last of his whiskey. You’re leaning both of your arms on the counter, running a finger around the rim of your champagne glass.

“What do you mean?” He asks, and you huff, look at him out of the corner of your eye, and your finger stops

“We always meet out of order. Hence, the diary. But… I just never expected it to hurt this much.” You sniffle again, and Osamu realizes he wants to make it better. He realizes he doesn’t like to see you cry.

But he doesn’t even know you!

Why should he care if you cried or not?

“If it’s any consolation… I’m sorry…” He says quietly, and you bark out a laugh,

“There’s nothing to be sorry for! I suppose this is just a chance for me to get to know the younger you.” You sniffle, but that bright smile that makes his heart race lights up your face once again. You seem to think something over before standing and offering Osamu a hand.

“Care to walk with me?” You tease him with a flirty wink, and he finds himself unable to say no.

So, as the clock chimes closer and closer to midnight, the two of you leave the bar, with you each paying for your respective drinks. Osamu offered to buy yours as an added apology, but you just patted his shoulder with a knowing smile and said, “I know you’re awful with money.”

Which… You weren’t wrong.

Just how much did you know about him?

How much had he told you in the future?

You walk next to him, bundled up in a trench coat not unlike his own and with your hands stuffed in your pockets. Osamu pulls his own (matching) trench coat over his suit coat and slacks and follows you out into the sprinkling snow. You both walk side by side in a surprisingly comfortable silence. At least until you hear people counting down in the streets.

10…

You blink and turn to look at him.

“What day is it again?” You ask, and he looks up at the snow.

“December 31st, 1925.” He replies, and you gape in surprise.

9…

“Y’know, I’ve never celebrated New Year's with time travel and all. Never even had a New Year's kiss.” You muse, watching couples get together on the streets.

8…

“Would you like one?” Osamu blurts, and you nearly trip in surprise. Osamu almost follows suit when you stop abruptly to look at him with wide eyes.

7…

“But you don’t even know me.” You say hesitantly, but you turn to face him nonetheless. He finds himself smiling, a soft, genuine sort of smile.

When was the last time he smiled like this?

6…

“I’m giving my future self the benefit of the doubt and trusting his judgment.” He teases, and you relax, hanging your head with a soft giggle. But you don’t pull away when he slowly pulls you in close to him.

5…

Your coat flaps open, and he sees his father’s initials stitched on the side and realizes you don’t just have matching coats—you have the exact same coat.

When did he give that to you? He swore he’d never give it up to remind himself to never return home!

4…

Your soft arms around his neck catch his attention, and you’re suddenly much closer, standing on your tiptoes in your kitten heels.

3…

His arms pull you close by your hips, and he leans down.

2…

Your noses brush.

1…

The kiss is like the fireworks going off above him. His eyes flutter close, and he pulls you impossibly closer. Your lips are soft with the lipstick, and he doesn’t care that it’s likely stained on his mouth.

“HAPPY NEW YEAR!”

The kiss deepens, and you soak up his affection greedily. Like you had been waiting for this forever. Your fingers tangle in his hair, holding him close oh so tenderly.

Like a puzzle piece being fit into place, his heart sang like a choir in a church.

Were you what he was missing all this time?

Could he finally have this?

Could he—

BANG! BANG! BANG!!

You jolt and fall to the ground as a car screeches around a corner and out of sight.

What?

What happened?

Osamu looks down and feels his heart stop.

You’re crumpled against the cement, blood seeping out of bullet holes in your abdomen. Your dress is ruined. But that doesn’t matter.

Osamu falls to his knees, not caring about the cold, wet concrete soaking his slacks. He pulls your upper half into his lap and applies pressure. You cry out and push his hands away.

“I need to put pressure on your injury. Hold still for me, love.” He whispers to you and turns to where people are still celebrating. “AMBULANCE! SOMEONE CALL AN AMBULANCE!” He cries, but they’re so wrapped up in their excitement that they don’t hear him.

Your hand touches his face, and he looks down to see you giving him a bloody smile. Crimson leaks from your mouth, and he can tell that you don’t have long.

“Hold on—Hold on, I’ll get a doctor—I’ll—” He stammers in an attempt to calm you (himself) down, and you just spit up blood in a choked laugh.

“We both know I’m not going to survive this.” You wheeze, and he can see the color draining from your face as you lose blood and warmth.

“Then I’ll jump back in time! Time can be rewritten!” You cut him off abruptly with more strength than he thought you had.

“Not those times. Not one line. Don’t you dare.” You say, hand falling to grip his hand as tightly as you could muster.

“But you’re dying.” He says, unable to explain why his heart is breaking to pieces inside his chest. You cough once more and smile that brilliant smile that he finds that he loves so much.

“It’s not over for you. You’ll see me again. You’ve got all of that to come.” You slur your words at this point, and he grits his teeth. Your hand goes weak in his, and he holds it even tighter.

“You and me. All those adventures all over time. You watch us run!” You whisper, and he leans down to press a kiss to your forehead just as you close your eyes.

117 AD

Rome, Italy

The crowd roars louder than Osamu has ever heard it. Bored, he watches as gladiators fight in the ring. The arena is bathed in blood, but he can’t bring himself to care.

He hasn’t cared about much since you died.

He wasn’t even sure why. He barely knew you. But he keeps thinking back to the kiss you shared on New Year’s. He thinks of your words.

“You watch us run!”

“Is this seat taken?” A voice yells over the crowd, and his heart stutters to a halt. He turns, eyes wide to see you.

Oh, how cruel this life was.

You’re dressed in a fashionable, long tunic that goes down to your ankles with a shawl of sorts around your shoulders. Your hair is longer than Osamu remembered. It is no longer a bob but instead curled at the front and with a braided crown in the back. You hold that journal under your arm and smile brightly before scurrying over and sitting beside him.

“Where are we at now?” You ask excitedly, pleased to see him.

But all he can see is your dead body in his arms.

Was there some god up above watching this cruel exchange with glee?

What had he done to deserve this?

“‘samu? Is everything okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost!”

‘samu?

The last person to call him that was his mother. Before she and his father began to fight. Back before he could time jump.

Back when things were simple.

Your hand on his arm has Osamu flinching away, causing you to cringe back as well. You look worried, panicked even, and all for him.

So you didn’t know yet. You didn’t know you were going to die.

So, he doesn’t tell you.

“Sorry, my love, I thought you were a monster here to gobble me up!” He chirps, and your panic melts away quickly. You lean back into his side, and he takes the chance to wrap a bandaged arm around your shoulders, pulling you into him. You giggle and open your book.

“Where are we now?” You repeat, and he shrugs,

“You tell me.” He says, keeping his eyes off your book out of respect and on the gladiator games below.

“France?”

“Not yet.”

“The Wild West? That was fun, wasn’t it?”

“Nope.”

You two go back and forth for a moment before you ultimately sigh and clap your book shut.

“It’s very early for you, isn’t it?” You say, mildly exasperated. Osamu nods silently, heart twisting when you set your book down and lean heavily into his side. He trickles his fingers along your neck, feeling goosebumps rise along the skin, and you shiver.

The games end, and you shuffle out of the Colosseum and through the streets of Rome. You boldly take ahold of Osamu’s hand as if this was regular for you. He can’t bring himself to let go, so he instead makes you laugh by swinging your arms between you, occasionally twirling you in a circle. His chilton feels suffocating despite it being made of linen.

But he can’t bring himself to time jump away. To leave you alone to spare his own feelings.

Perhaps it’s the overwhelming guilt he feels?

Perhaps it’s because he finds himself enjoying your company.

Either way, he allows you to pull him around the ancient cobblestone streets of Rome. Enjoying the markets and public museums that were beginning to pop up all over the city.

The entire time, he doesn’t let go of your hand.

August 8th, 1912

The Wild West

It’s hot.

Almost overwhelmingly so.

Osamu peels off one of his gloves and fans his face with it as he climbs the steps to the little cabin he had been staying at. His bandages itch with the heat, and he has a sneaking suspicion that they’re slowly soaking with sweat underneath his borrowed button-down, vest, trousers, and chaps.

Though he wouldn’t admit it to anyone, he liked this place sans the heat. The people in this little settled town were kind, barely batting an eye when he suddenly appeared in their home. The people he was currently staying with, an older couple named Buck and Bonnie, welcomed him with open arms. They claimed it was because he reminded them of their son, who was out settling the rest of the West.

“Osamu? Are you done already?” Bonnie asks where she’s putting a pie on the windowsill to cool. Apple, by the smell of it, and utterly delicious.

“Just taking a break, Bonnie. Buck works me to the bone!” He says and collapses on the couch, his spurs jingling as he kicks his feet up over the edge of the sofa and leans his head back, tipping his hat down over his face. He hears Bonnie say something, but he’s already halfway to dreamland.

Despite only intending to sleep for a few minutes, Osamu naps for the better part of an hour. He only wakes up when he hears the whinny of an unfamiliar horse and quick steps up to the cabin door. Then, an excited set of knocks.

“Can you get that, Osamu? I’m busy with supper!” Bonnie calls from the kitchen, and he calls back, saying that he would.

Only to come face to face with you.

It had been ages since he saw you. He had yet to see you at any significant historical events that he time jumped to. The Titanic, the moon landing. Hell, he hadn’t even seen you during World War Two when he was accidentally drafted!

“You!” He jabs a finger, and you grin adoringly, stepping under his arm and skipping to the kitchen.

“It’s me, Granny!” You chirp, and he hears a delighted squeal.

“Dearest! It’s been ages!”

So you’ve been here before.

Several times by how familiar Bonnie seemed with you.

Osamu meanders his way into the kitchen, where Bonnie is wiping her hands on her apron. She grins at the sight of him,

“This is Osamu! He’s been helping Buck around the farm for the last few weeks!” She says, and Osamu tips his hat with a wink.

“We’ve met before.” He says, and you jump up from where you had been sitting at the dining table and throw your arms around his neck in a tight hug.

“‘samu!” You cheer, and he returns any affection greedily, pressing a kiss to your cheek. He’s still unable to get the sight of your corpse out of his mind. But he vowed that if he ever saw you again, he’d accept any love you’d give him.

You’re dressed the part of a cowgirl. A long calico skirt and long-sleeved button-down. Your hair is longer than he remembered, tied back in a braid, and a bandana around your neck to protect you from the harsh sun above. Your hat sits on the table, and so do your gloves.

Your skin is just as soft as he remembers.

It isn’t long before Buck is called in for dinner, and the four of you eat together. You sit to Osamu’s right, with Bonnie to his left and Buck across from him. You chat happily with the couple, and Osamu is content with just sitting and watching. You tell an obviously edited version of your adventures, with grand sweeping gestures and voices to accompany your tales.

Long after Bonnie and Buck go to bed, Osamu finds you on the swinging bench on the front porch. You’re writing in your journal, about halfway full, and sketching a picture of him.

It’s an incredible likeness to his face and rather impressive to look at. You even got his cowboy hat right.

“Mind if I sit?” He asks, and you jump, slamming your journal shut and looking up with wide eyes. But you realize it’s him, relax, your shoulders sagging, and nod with a smile. The wood creaks as he sits at your side. His arm stretches along the back like it belongs there, and you lean into his side. He relished in your warmth.

“Have we done Rome yet?” He asks, and you shake your head.

“I was thinking of going there next, though!” You say, and he nods, leaning his head against yours.

“How come you never go to big events?” He asks next, and you hum with a shrug,

“I like the little days. I like seeing how people live their day-to-day lives.” You say, and he can’t help but laugh.

You were truly the exact opposite of him.

You swat his chest,

“Don’t laugh at me!” You cry with mock anger, but a smile curls the corners of your mouth. Like you liked hearing him laugh. You give him pause when you lean up and press a kiss to his nose. He freezes, blinks several times, and stares down at you.

“I love your laugh.” You say, and his smile falters just the slightest bit.

No one liked hearing him laugh.

Not since he left home, at least.

But you were his home now.

October 31st, 2012

Yokohama, Japan

Fog rolls through the streets of Yokohama. Osamu strolls the streets, hands in his pockets. He was alone. At least for the time being. At least until you showed up again.

If you showed up again.

No… You would… Osamu had faith. You usually did on the small days.

Whenever his nightmares got particularly bad, he’d time jump to a place he thought you’d like. This time, it was Yokohama, Japan. Notably, it was Halloween. Nothing ever happened on Halloween. Well… except for that one time…

Oh, whatever.

He had been here for a few months, finding himself at peace in modern-day Japan. He discovered his parent’s graves and realized he was home.

At least… when he wasn’t with you.

Until he saw you crossing the street.

You looked younger than he had ever seen you before. Another young girl walked beside you, both of you dressed in Halloween costumes and laughing amongst yourselves.

But the longer he watched you, the longer he realized something.

You wouldn’t know who he was. No, no, no, it was much too early for that. He had never seen you so young before. Not even in pictures when you had shown him at Versailles.

Was this before you began to time jump?

Suddenly, a hand smacked the back of his head, and he flinched, turning to see his newest acquaintance, Kunikida Doppo. He was shouting something. Something about being a bandage-wasting machine. Something about being a lowlife. He didn’t bother listening.

Instead, he looked back to see you looking at him. There isn’t the faintest glimpse of recognition in your eyes. Nary a clue of who he is.

You genuinely don’t know who he is at this point in time.

You lift a hand and wave with a friendly smile, unknowingly making his heart crack in two.

So, he turns, walks past Kunikida without a word, and heads back the way he came.

“Dazai!” Kunikida’s voice, and he hears his acquaintance (He doesn’t have friends. He’s utterly alone in this world.) running up behind him.

“What is it, Kunikida.” His voice sounds oddly monotone, and he knows he has to get you out of his head before he breaks down. He can’t ever come back here, not without causing a paradox and ripping Yokohama apart.

And that would mean he would never see you, ever.

“Are you okay?” Kunikida’s voice makes him stop. He spins with a plastic smile on his face and his heart threading to pieces.

“Of course I’m okay! What makes you think otherwise?” He titters with an all too fake-sounding laugh. Kunikida looks uncharacteristically solemn.

“Well… For instance, you’re crying.” He says, concern seeping into his tone.

Osamu reaches up and touches his cheek, finding that it is indeed wet and glistening with tears.

#dazai osamu x reader #dazai osamu x you #dazai osamu x y/n #osamu dazai x reader #osamu dazai x you #osamu dazai x y/n #dazai x reader #dazai x you #dazai x y/n #fairy writes #bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bsd

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devilsrecreation · 3 days

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Outlander incorrect quotes part 5426 (jk idek how many there are now)

Kion: You cannot deny that you trespass into the Pridelands almost every day!

Janja: YOU CANNOT DENY DEEZ NUTS!

Janja: Me and my boys are gonna mess you up!

Chungu: I rolled a 1

Cheezi: I rolled a 1

Janja: Fuck-

Kenge: I’m going to need a skull and I can’t have you ask any questions

Sumu: *shows Kenge his skull collection* Take your pick

Kenge:

Sumu:

Kenge: This one’s fine

Reirei: I got to get back before Goigoi realizes I’m not in bed

Goigoi: Reirei?…..REIREI😭😭😭

Janja: I kissed Jasiri!

Chungu: Woah….

Cheezi: We owe Nne and Tano so much money!

Every time the two-leggers come to the Outlands

Nduli: The most obvious two-leg trap I have ever seen

Tamka: I’m gonna touch it!

Nduli: NO TAMKA, YOU’RE GONNA GET KIDNAPPED

Piga (Kiburi’s son): We never should have come in the Badlands

Bingwa: No guts, no glory

Piga: Are you ever scared of anything?

Bingwa: Yeah, dying alone. That’s why I brought you here

Makuu, talking about Ucheshi: We need to find my mate. I’m worried about her

Fuli: Seriously, what do you see in her?

Makuu: She makes me laugh

Human au:

Tamka: Neema, what am I gonna do to lose all this weight?!

Neema: [Stop inventing things like cheesecake pizza]

Teaching the Idiots how to act around royalty:

Mzingo: One should bow gracefully and say: “My dear Queen, how delightful to meet your acquaintance.”

Goigoi: *bows* My queer deen, how delightful to aquaint your maintenance!

If Scar met my oc’s

Scar: When I’m done with you, you won’t be able to see out of both eyes

Kiatu: Congratulations, you are as effective as pollen.

Scar: I MEAN I’m going to make you feel pain!

Nguvu: Rabies already does that. Next

Scar: You won’t be able to think straight!

Ucheshi: Try being looney.

Scar: I’M GOING TO BASH YOUR HEAD INTO A WALL!

Kifo: That’s already happened to me. Come on, be creative!

Scar: I’M GONNA MAKE YOU WANT TO DIE!

Wakali: I’m a part of Gen Z! You’re late to the party!

Scar: WHAT INTIMIDATES YOU?!

Aibu: The skinks!

The Outlanders in an escape room

Jasiri: We need to find a murder weapon. It’s been a while since I’ve played clue

Reirei: We found a rope!

Mzingo: Rope…revolver…

Kiburi: There’s a dagger…

Janja: And a banana!

Reirei: There’s no banana!

Janja: Then why did they give me a banana?

Reirei: How do you kill someone with a banana, Janja?

Janja: Maybe they’re allergic!

Kiburi: Who’s allergic to bananas?

Janja: Lot of people

Mzingo: Name one

Janja: NO

The Outlanders in an escape room part 2:

Janja: Alright, fellas! I want you to spread out and look for clues

Chungu, Cheezi, Nne, and Tano: YOU GOT IT, BOSS!

Janja: Now get to it!

Cheezi: Janja! I found a door, Janja!

Janja: That’s a good report, Cheezi!

Chungu: *on the floor* Janja! I found the floor!

Janja: That’s terrible! Get off of that!

TLG writers: Have you ever heard the sound of a snake falling into lava?

Us fans: Uh uh

Writers: W O U L D Y O U L I K E T O???

#why can’t i get enough of these djhdjdhd #this’ll be the last part until i find more lmao #also i should develop the next gen oc’s more i like playing around with them #the first two are my favorites they’re so accurate #actually yk what i should do more regular show quotes #tlg outlanders #the lion guard

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blazingstar400 · 16 hours

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Incorrect Scarlet and Violet Quotes Part 6

Just everybody’s typical school lives.

[Clavell after catching Juliana, Nemona, and Arven riding Koraidon in the school halls]

Clavell: All of you are in big trouble for not only riding Koraidon in the school’s halls, but for also having three people, a very unsafe number, for riding just one Pokémon!

Nemona: Shoot!

Arven: Wait, three?

Clavell: Yes?

Juliana: OH MY GOSH FLORIAN FELL OFF!!!!

[Florian finally shows up to class after missing a few days]

Jacq: Where have you been?

Florian: Asleep.

Jacq: For four days?

Florian: Yeah.

Clavell: Good job, Arven.

Arven: Thanks, dad.

[Everyone freezes]

Arven: Why is everyone staring at me?

Penny: You just called Director Clavell ‘Dad’. You said ‘Thanks, dad’.

Arven: What? No I didn’t!

Clavell: Do you see me as a father figure, Arven?

Arven: No! If anything I see you more as a bother figure because you’re always bothering me!

Saguaro: Hey! Show your father some respect!

Arven: He’s not my dad!

Juliana: I just find it surprising you attached on to Clavell of all people.

Arven: I didn’t! But even if I did, who else would I attach to?!? Raifort?!

Raifort, who is on the far side of the room reading a book: I really don’t appreciate being brought into this discussion.

Arven: You see?!

Juliana: Hmm.

Clavell: Alright, I believe you.

Arven: Thank you!

Clavell: …Son.

Arven:

Clavell: Do you want to talk about this… over a game of catch?

Arven:

Arven: ……I’d like that…

Juliana: Do you ever just see something that changes your life and you’re just like ‘huh’.

Kieran: I saw you.

Juliana: That’s so nice and sweet and it makes this really awkward because I was just gonna show you this drawing Drayton made of Carmine as a monkey.

[The gang about to head out on a field trip]

Cyrano: Now before we take off make sure that all small things are secure.

Drayton: *leaning over to Kieran*

Kieran: What?

Drayton, smirking: Do you feel safe?

Kieran, through gritted teeth: Stop—!

Kieran: Despite what everyone thinks, I don’t actually hate everyone in this class.

Carmine: Are you sure about that…?

Kieran: Well actually Drayton is completely terrible.

Drayton: Ouch.

Kieran: I dislike Crispin because he’s Crispin.

Crispin: Really bro…

Kieran: Juliana was clearly cheating in the training session yesterday.

Juliana: Wha—

Lacey: Juliana winning isn’t called cheating…!

Kieran: Amarys was being particularly annoying this morning.

Amarys: I just said ‘excuse me’ because you were blocking my way…

Kieran: And Florian said ‘It’s not appropriate to yell at other students.’

Carmine: Soo you hate everyone then?

Kieran: Well maybe if all of you stopped being so irritating I might like you better.

[Geeta and Rika being called into Clavell’s office]

Clavell: Juliana got into a fight today.

Geeta: Is she okay?!

Rika: Did she win?!

Juliana: Just forget about it, no one got hurt.

Miriam: You had a concussion!

Juliana: No one got seriously hurt.

Miriam: You were in the ER for six hours!!

[Dendra when she just became a teacher at Uva/Naranja Academy]

Dendra, waking up in a panic: Shoot, I’m late to class!!!

Dendra, lying back down: Eh, but I already gratulated…

Dendra:

Dendra, sitting back up: Shoot, I’m the teacher!!!

Clavell: Florian, did you happen to hear my announcement?

Florian: I hanged onto every word.

Clavell: I’m going to assume that’s sarcasm.

Florian: Correct.

Clavell: So you didn’t hear my announcement?

Florian: I’m barely listening now.

[Juliana after helping Arven and Kieran study for a upcoming test]

Juliana, beaming: Alright guys, I think you’re both ready for that test!

Arven: Great, I just want to test my knowledge real quick. Give me a word.

Juliana: Oh, okay!

Juliana: Um… what’s a synonym for ‘abandonment’?

Arven: Oh, I know this one!

Arven: My childhood!

Juliana: What—?

Kieran:

Kieran: I was going to say something different but actually I second that.

Juliana:

Juliana, tearing up: Aw, you guys—

Nemona: *actually studies, gets good grades*

Juliana: *doesn’t study, still passes*

Arven: *gets Bs*

Florian: *low Cs, doesn’t care*

Penny: *cheats and gets away with it*

Drayton: *cheats, and gets caught*

Crispin: *gets a B-, and is happy*

[At lunch hour]

Juliana: Arven, we’re hungry!

Nemona: Yeah, Arven, we’re hungry!

Carmine: Hurry up, Arven!

Penny: What’s taking so long, Arven?

Florian: Arven, what’s for lunch?

Arven: *screams*

Kieran: Look, I don’t want to talk about it.

Juliana, pulling out a guitar: Would you rather sing about it?

Kieran:

Kieran: You make it so hard for me not to murder you sometimes—

Juliana: Trust fall!

Clavell, from the other side of the room: I’m not going to catch you.

Juliana: Trust. Fall.

Clavell: No.

Juliana: I’m falling!

Clavell, launching himself over the table to catch her: WAIT—!!

Drayton: What are you doing?

Crispin: Homework.

Drayton: There was school today?

Crispin: *nods*

Drayton: I thought it was a long weekend.

Crispin: It’s Thursday.

Drayton: Oh, it’s almost the weekend. No point in going now.

Jacq: Florian is late again.

Penny: I woke him up at 8 and pretended it was 11.

Nemona: I wrote a fake schedule saying we started at 9 instead of 12.

Juliana: I set his clock to PM instead of AM.

Jacq:

Jacq: You all may have overdone it.

Florian, bursting through the door panicked: WHAT YEAR IS IT?!?!

Tyme, walking into the classroom: Alright, so today— *sees ‘Turn down for —’ written on the board*

Tyme, confused: Turn down for what?

[Suddenly ‘Turn Down for What’ blasts through the speakers as the whole class gets up and begins partying]

The sv gang: TURN DOWN FOR WHAT!

Yes both Geeta and Rika grew so attached that they are practically Juliana’s adopted moms lol.

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1tsteatime · 10 hours

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REFERENCE TO JON AND MARTIN IN EPISODE 17

RIGHT HELLO I NEED TO KNOW I'M NOT CRAZY HERE.

I loved episode 17, and this isn't even to talk about the VERY interesting details to do with Celia at the start, and the jmj error at the end (trust me, those are whole crates of worms to be opened), but this post in particular is about a very quick, very sly detail at the start of the statement.

Allow me, if you will, to quote directly from the transcript:

"Anyway, there was a new receptionist behind the old front desk, some big, soft-looking guy who stumbled over every word. A year ago, it would probably have wound me right up, but what can I say? Therapy works.

There was another patient too, some bookish-looking guy with serious city miles. I used to play the game “what are you in for,” where I would pass the time guessing… well. You know. In my head he was definitely some kind of weird pervert, really into stroking orchids or something."

PLEASE TELL ME I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE HEARING SEASON 1 JON AND MARTIN? Let's check the list:

Big, soft looking guy: that runs true with every canon description we've heard about Martin, not to mention ALL the fanart. Not to conflate fanon with canon, but here it's pretty cut and dry. Besides, 'stumbled over every word'? Now that is Martin to a tee, particularly in season 1.

Bookish-looking guy: oh, it's not like we know a certain stuffy archivist who is known for saying 'good lord' and describing merry-go-rounds as 'thrilling'. Again, I'm not saying those are the same thing but COME ON. The next bit is also interesting: 'serious city miles'. That can refer to someone who looks rough due to life incidents or substance use, and we do know that Jon is a smoker. The stroking orchids bit I have no clue about, likely just a funny line.

Their roles in this cameo are interesting as well; Martin as a receptionist and Jon as a patient. Besides thinking of a dozen fanfic AUs that would leap from this topic, it sort of reverses the power dynamic? Well, not exactly, but the roles do make sense given what we know about them: Martin being very caring and compassionate, but not the most qualified, and Jon's mental state being...less than stellar, this totally checks out.

Now, I'm not banking any firm theories on this; honestly I think we're still too early in the podcast to have a semblance of the 'real' plot, but if this is foreshadowing instead of just a cute nod to the characters, here is the proposal I'll make:

What if the dimension shifting didn't happen perfectly? This episode already deals with identity, and body vs mind vs soul. What if that is Jon and Martin's actual bodies, but their souls got separated? Now these incorporeal souls need a host...maybe an old computer database? What if those 'city miles' weren't just any old marks, but warm holes, desolation burns, our Jon's scars and wounds. What if their bodies have forgotten what happened to them?

There is a good chance that this goes totally nowhere. Still though, I'm calling it early. So excited to see where this all goes!

#tma #tmp #tmagp #the magnus protocol #the magnus archives #tmp spoilers #tmp theory

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wakfu-weekly · 3 months

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“so is a relationship with an ecaflip considered interspecies??” : a Wakfu chat log. Year 2022, Rubilax server.

Screenshotted trainwreck of a convo I still think about to this day.

#I quote these in my head every now and then #“just say kabrok is a furry” “flee’s”#there is no character named Samantha in wakfu #“Furrys?? It ain’t FUR in me bloody skin (…)”#iirc last one was an ouginak player #wakfu #tales from the server #wakfu mmo #wakfu MMORPG #ecaflip #wakfu ecaflip #chat log #this screenshot only matters to me

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twistedappletree · 6 months

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lan qiren: what’s the most effective way of subduing a fierce corpse?

jin ling: please, i was killing fierce corpses with my eyes closed before i could wal—

lan qiren: boastful and naive. Zizhen?

ouyang zizhen: …with the power of friendship?

lan qiren: useless.

lan jingyi: wh—

lan qiren: wrong.

lan jingyi: but i didn’t even—

lan qiren: moving on.

#Sizhui isn’t there because he already aced the test #lmFAO #mdzs #the untamed #mo dao zu shi #mdzs meme #mdzs crack #mdzs shitposting #incorrect quotes #incorrect mdzs #jin ling #lan jingyi #ouyang zizhen #lan qiren #i like the idea of lan qiren testing their knowledge every now and then just to mess with them lmaooo #mdzs juniors #apple memes 🍎#source: my dumb head #the grandmaster of demonic cultivation

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evasive-anon · 5 months

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Imagine being the writer for UtRH and putting together a whole fight segment together where Batman and Red Hood work together to take down a team of bad guys, and Jason falls into step perfectly from him and Bruce's old training- giving a taste of nostalgia of what was and could have been. Batman leaves Jason an opening that can be used against him, a moment of pure faith that they're on the same side and Jason uses the chance on their common enemy and its like just *THE* moment in the middle of this arch.

And SOMEHOW you are still thinking that the emotional impact of that would be negated just because you end it with Jason killing a nazi??? Like killing a nazi is supposed to have made him unrelatable and evil to the audience???

I just think most people who read comics like the idea of bad guys getting some comeuppance, that's the fantasy that is being sold. How did you not realize this would appeal to a huge portion of your market?

Source panels below:

#dc i have no idea how you thought this was what a hate-able villian looked like #like i can't track down that interview now where they talked about how they thought no one would be able to relate to Jason #but that quote lives in my head rent free every time I re-read these comics #I say this is the moment in my post but TBH there were so many banger moments in this arch #judd winick #under the red hood #jason todd #red hood #utrh #bruce wayne #batman #dc comics #comic panels #long post #oc #original post

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rooolt · 2 years

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The thing that makes me so insane about scary marlowe is how real she feels to me. Like previous Beth characters have always been ridiculous and silly and stupid and I’ve loved them in their own right but there’s something about scary that makes me look at her and go “I could know this girl.” Like she’s a teenager who never came to terms with her dad leaving and is now lashing out at the easiest target and subsequently everyone. Terry spurs it on with this sense of permanency, if he moves into her life her dad will never come back and never love her, and from there she becomes wrapped up in a whirlwind of who she is or who she should be. Ultimately scary is a scared and upset teenage girl who latches on to the first powerful influence in her life that says he cares about her. Sure terry says he cares, but if he really did would he be replacing her real dad? And terry isn’t giving her magic powers to protect herself. Willy as her patron is also really interesting because all the kids get their powers from daddy magic, from their connection to their fathers which we know doesn’t have to be biological because of link, but Scary’s powers are not built on her relationship with terry, THEY COME FROM WILLY. If she abandons him that doesn’t leave her powerless because of daddy magic and terry, but I think at least at this point the daddy magic Scary’s using, if any, is built on her connection with willy

#Long rambly post from Roolt dropping at almost midnight #A classic #Now I’m gonna go to bed and think of my own fucked up tern gurl #Like scary is what I want autumn (my oc) to be likr #I love when teen girls are fucked in the head and destroy every connection in their life because of it only sending them down a worse path #To quote my favorite ao3 comment I’ve ever gotten “being 15 is pretty fucked up innit”#dndads #dungeons and daddies #scary marlowe #also does any of this post make sense I’m so tired

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