I just remembered Ludinus telling Caleb outright that Trent "has his uses", and with regard to the Scourger program, which Trent himself designed and pitched, "desperate requirements might call for unsavory methods."

And given that we know now that Ludinus has been singlemindedly focused on the current goals of the Ruby Vanguard for a lot longer than the program would've been in existence, I'm just imagining a timeline in which Caleb and Beau had not gotten the program shuttered in 836 PD, and that entire force of highly-conditioned, high level arcane assassins was simply at Ludinus's disposal.

say it with me everybody: personal health is completely immaterial to morality, including mental health. leading a mentally unhealthy lifestyle (or what you perceive as a mentally unhealthy lifestyle) does not a bad person make. no one has to socialize, exercise, have healthy coping mechanisms, or lead (what you perceive as) a fulfilling life with fulfilling hobbies in the same way that no one has to go to the doctor to get a broken bone reset. both of those types of management of personal health are likely to be beneficial to the individual, but they are in no way moral requirements or debts owed to society. they do not actually say anything about a person's principles, personality, or actions towards others. additionally, people know themselves and their own situations better than you do. maybe a person judges that the physical and financial toll of going to the doctor outweigh the benefit of getting their bone reset, maybe a person just does not have the capacity to develop healthy coping mechanisms at this point in their life, and yes, maybe a person feels like they are totally fulfilled by "media based" hobbies alone and would feel no difference in their life if they picked up a loom. just like. let people be sick without accusing them of being representative of the lazy, degenerated state of modern society.

i gotta talk about my low empathy james fitzjames headcanon actually. i prommy i don't use it to excuse any of the acts of violence he committed against his fellow man (not just the colonialism either, but things like the petty rivalry with crozier that borders on bullying prior to the death of franklin) because as a low empathy person i know that's not how it works. but i do think that viewing his actions through a lens of understanding that both circumstances such as his birth and being a part of the british empire as well several choices he's made in life (particularly his sycophantic attitude towards those in positions of greater authority whose favour can work in his and his participation in active combat) have led him to become broadly alienated from other people and both their and his own emotions makes them more interesting.

you know what the blood gulch chronicles are so fucking funny. the first few episodes is just a bunch of idiots shit talking. absolute useless nonsense.

but its not random rubbish being thrown around. the conservations, as ridiculouse as they are, have a flow. You can actually follow how you got from a to q, even if just looking at a nd q seperately is like, how the fuck did that happen. every comment bounces off of a previous one.

red team trying to name M12 LRV. its just gold. the bickering. simmons being the one not believing that pumas are a real animal. how they keep roasting grif for 'making up animals'.

the way the lines are delivered. it's hilarious.

you examine yourself like studying a virus.

for days after, months - years, even - you torture yourself over small objects. times where you misspoke or interrupted with a joke when you should have listened. times when you didn't know how to show your support. times when you were louder, brassier, inappropriate for the situation. times when you were too quiet, shy, cold.

fucker. you constantly promise that next-time you'll do better. you will make sure every person you come in contact with leaves smiling. that they'll all feel loved and accepted and held. that you take care. other people do it! other people are actually good people; you're just cruel.

it feels like you are fighting a horrible little beetle. one of those parasites that control ants. one who comes up and wiggles into your brain and makes you a shameful ghost of a person. too spineless to ever be a demon. so what if you were having a bad day? you don't get to stumble. so what if you are overwhelmed? you don't need to make a scene.

all this time on the earth. you are still somehow convinced: the mistakes you make are more important than any other part of you. you still feel like you are wrestling a nature you do not understand; one that coils horribly inside of you. one that seeks to destroy, to undo.

you go home. you replay the moments where you weren't perfect. be better, you scold. do more. you are an accident. a train wreck. something to abhor.

the questions always ringing in your head: why did i do that? why do i slip? why can't i just fucking be normal? what if all i am is just ... this?

so fucking sick of people saying im “angry” or “trying to start an argument” because thats literally just my voice!! “no need to get frustrated :)” im not! frustrated!! THAT IS LITERALLY JUST WHAT MY FUCKING VOICE SOUNDS LIKE!!

[caps transcription: “that is literally just what my fucking voice sounds like!!” end caps transcription.]

What I’m about to say is probably a much less generous interpretation of what people usually intend when they say “transphobia hurts cis people too,” but the problem this framing runs into, over and over again, is the implied argument that often runs underneath it, which is that if transphobia were contained to just trans people, that if 100% of its targets were transgender, it would be somehow more legitimate or more reasonable, even if you still concede it’s wrong to be transphobic to trans people. Like the logic being used here isn't that transphobia at its core is destructive and irrational because it harms trans people, it’s that the people doing the transphobia are doing it “wrong” by picking the “wrong” targets. And I think this framing tends to put a lot of emphasis on individual transphobic actors or individual instances of transphobic violence (eg people attacking cis women who “look like men” in bathrooms, transvestigators, etc) by way of arguing that these bigoted people are incapable of governing their own bigotry appropriately, that it keeps spilling out into the broader cis public (where it ought not to be) because they’re too stupid to recognise their real targets and mistakenly keep picking the wrong ones, and because of this we need to do something about it. Like what keeps getting highlighted in conversations where I see people repeat this line are the bigots’ errors in judgement, that these pattern recognition errors (this continued failure to clock “real trans people”) are too frequent for the cis public to ignore - effectively, transphobia is spilling out of the transphobia department and into other departments of social life, and this is the problem that needs correcting. Fundamentally what I keep hearing when people use this argument is that reactionaries are getting too unruly, too imprecise in their targeting mechanisms, and that this is the cause for concern, not the underlying bigotry itself. Yes, transphobia is expansionary, it will continue to find fresh victims even in hypothetical futures where “the transgender problem” has been fully dealt with, but that shouldn’t be your primary concern lol

Fought 'til you tethered me, swept under surfaces, never enough of it...

redacted headcanons if they were filipino 🇵🇭

please bear w me and my scattered thoughts😭 also credits to @pandoraroid for the vincent hc it's so real

- when the shaw pack gets together they do the family gathering thing of making the kids have a dance competition for money

- angel doesn't know how to commute (public transportation) and david would have to come along with them on a jeep to help them learn

"davey ikaw pumara para sakin please nahihiya ako" "kaya mo yan, dali lalagpas na tayo oh"

("davey can you make the jeep stop please i'm too shy" "you can do it, cmon we're gonna miss our stop")

- at a jollibee birthday party david would always help the shaw kids win the "bring me game" . that shit is SERIOUS for him i would bet

- milo would overdress all the time  . kahit anong ganap he will be layering IN SPITE of the heat. he'd also be called "estetik" and he HATES IT  .

(estetik: from aesthetic, used to make fun of people who dress up)

*(kahit anong ganap: whatever event there is)

- also, milo and sweetheart ukay-ukay dates perhaps. . . . but i think they'd both get carried away because they'd be blessed by the ukay gods and forget they were ever on a date

(ukay-ukay: secondhand shops in the ph!! mainly clothes)

vincent and lovely  . aircon humor x kanal humor CMAWWNN. the vampire houses alone r so extra and fancy vincent would for sure have the conyo/filipino rich ppl accent too like. 

(vin telling lovely abt his first summit): vin: "ok so inisip ko like, paano ako gaganti kay william during the summit, right? so i decided i was going to show up looking like as the, pinaka-antithesis of what he wants me to look like."

lovely, absorbing nothing of what he just said: "HUY antithesis???????"

(vin: "ok so i thought, how am i gonna get back at william during the summit, right?; ...looking like the (most)antithesis of what he wants me to look like.")

(aircon humor: humor associated with wealthy people, priv school kids, "out of touch" humor

kanal humor: "public school humor" , vulgar and relatable

conyo: someone who speaks filo+english in a pretentious way, mostly due to being raised wealthy . idk they always have that rich ppl accent)

- i can't imagine guy being filipino no matter what i do. however, i think honey is for sure filo (projecting) and they wld have a complete filo friend group  . honey wld still have that gruff exterior but their walls r down, and their friends would joke that honey and guy r the "nonchalant x oa" pairing and guy wld have NO clue what they're all talkin abt.

(oa: over acting, usually used negatively to call someone dramatic, but with the "nonchalant x oa" it's kinda similar to the introvert x extrovert trope)

- when honey brings guy along to hang out w/ their filo friends, he just looks at them mesmerized 90% of the time they're all talking . afterwards, when they ask abt it, guy says that honey is way more expressive when they speak in filipino and he thinks its rlly cute (IDK. I FEEL THIS ONE IN MY BONES .)

- i also have a hc that honey likes to draw so . stem strand/course to art course pipeline baby (many filipinos can relate🔥🔥🔥)

general idea / kinda just a joke but honestly it'd be so hard to allude to being a vamp in the philippines . 

"pag natamaan yung balat ko ng araw, nasusunog ako" "beh nasa pinas ka, lahat tayo nasusunog"

("when the sunlight hits my skin, i start to burn" "beh you're in the philippines, we're all burning")

I do have a question

Was this an actual genuine reaction from Mierin Eronaile or what?

So, uh...

Mine lived(?)

How Are We Doing.

I just began I Shall Wear Midnight, and decided to do an older Tiffany ^o^

If everything goes right there may be an animation!

So, obviously Loki is manipulating the timeline to make life easier for Mobius, playing love songs whenever he enters a room, etc. But what I wanna know is - what's he doing to any asshole that dares to cross Mobius? I'm just saying - he threw Brad down a flight of stairs for roughing Mobius up just a little bit. What happens when some jerk cuts him off in traffic?

Some people do kinda suck but I find a lot of joy in giving people really specifics compliments at my job and it makes their whole day sometimes c: 💛

Opinion on power joe 🎤

I think Power Joe is STUPID and SMELLY and is definitely the more annoying one. Not fun to combine with either! And he doesn't even wash his hands after he has his oil changed-