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#Cease striving and know that I am God
thinkingonscripture · 2 years
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God is our Refuge and Strength - Psalm 46:1-11
God is our Refuge and Strength – Psalm 46:1-11
Psalm 46 is classified as one of the Psalms of Zion. The others include Psalm 48, 84, 87, and 122. These songs of Zion celebrate Jerusalem as the place where God dwells with His people (i.e., the city of God). Psalm 46 focuses on God as the refuge and strength of His people when they turn to Him in a time of distress. This psalm is very personal. God is declared to be “our refuge and strength”…
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bloodscribed · 3 months
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PROMPTS FROM VARIOUS LITERARY SOURCES.
I have not broken your heart — you have; and in breaking it, you have broken mine.
I cannot make you understand. I cannot make anyone understand what is happening inside me. I cannot even explain it to myself.
Since we're all going to die, it's obvious that when and how don't matter.
When life itself seems lunatic, who knows where the madness lies?
To dream the impossible dream, that is my quest.
When we set the carriage afire, her flesh will be roasted, her bones will be charred: she will die an agonizing death.
What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us.
I have been and still am a seeker, but I have ceased to question stars and books; I have begun to listen to the teaching my blood whispers to me.
The bird fights its way out of the egg.
I have no right to call myself one who knows.
We who bore the mark might well be considered by the rest of the world as strange, even as insane and dangerous.
I have no idea whether parents can be of help, and I do not blame mine.
At one time I had given much thought to why men were so very rarely capable of living for an ideal. Now I saw that many, no, all men were capable of dying for one.
I will not make a gift of myself, I must be won.
Examine a person closely enough and you know more about him than he does himself.
One cannot apologize for something fundamental, and a child feels and knows this as well and as deeply as any sage.
The tree does not die. It waits.
Fate and character are different names for the same idea.
As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.
A man sees in the world what he carries in his heart.
All theory is gray, my friend. But forever green is the tree of life.
I am not omniscient, but I know a lot.
Everything transitory is but an image.
One mind is enough for a thousand hands.
Man errs, till he has ceased to strive.
Words are mere sound and smoke, dimming the heavenly light.
But you will never know another's heart, unless you are prepared to give yours too.
The Devil's in the house and can't get out.
Men's wretchedness in soothe I so deplore.
To go wrong in one's own way is better than to go right in someone else's.
It takes something more than intelligence to act intelligently.
Your worst sin is that you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for nothing.
When reason fails, the devil helps!
A hundred suspicions don't make a proof.
The man who has a conscience suffers whilst acknowledging his sin. That is his punishment.
The fear of appearances is the first symptom of impotence.
Break what must be broken, once for all, that's all, and take the suffering on oneself.
Have you ever heard of 'a genius who had been stuffed and preserved'?
Every day I am fated to die.
All the activities of life seem unbearably dull to me and I have renounced them.
 If you would be nice to me, I would gladly die for you this moment.
Having made an utter failure of my life, I found myself one day in the midst of my poverty and wretchedness, thinking about the female companions of my youth.
So, surrender to sleep at last. What a misery, keeping watch through the night, wide awake -- you’ll soon come up from under all your troubles.
Man is the vainest of all creatures that have their being upon earth.
There is a time for making speeches, and a time for going to bed.
For there is nothing better in this world than that man and wife should be of one mind in a house.
I swear by the greatest, grimmest oath that binds the happy gods.
Few sons are the equals of their fathers; most fall short, all too few surpass them.
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thiswasneverthat · 10 months
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monday
ㅡ seven masterlist
❅ chan x fem!reader
❅ smut, slight fluff
❅ masturbating (f&m), exhibitionism, slight dirty talks
❅ wc: 900+
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After a seemingly endless day at the office, you were finally back home, and the sense of relief you feel was truly indescribable. There was nothing quite like being in the comfort of your own space after a long and hectic day.
"Ugh, I miss him," you breathed out heavily as you kick off your high heels and throw yourself onto the velvet couch in the living room.
Earlier in the morning, Chris told you that he had a few meetings and he would be home a little later than usual.
There were times when you wanted to ask him not to overwork himself, but unlike you who merely work because the earning was adequate, Chris took pride in his work and genuinely strives to achieve excellence in everything he did.
Well, one thing about Chrisㅡ aside from being an amazing boyfriend, he was also very good at his job. That also kind of explained why he was the boss' favorite employee. 
So, for the time being, while you were waiting for him to come home, you had no other option but to entertain yourself.
Without putting much thought into it, you took off your professional attire and made your way to the bathroom. You then filled up the bathtub with warm water and bubble baths before you soaked yourself in.
Hardly five minutes inside the bathtub, you instantly felt as if you were in another dimension. The warm water gave you a considerable amount of solace and was working wonders in soothing your aching muscles. But not only that, both of your hands were also working in sync underwater to indulge yourself. 
"Ahㅡ shit," a hoarse grunt rolled out of your throat the moment you slipped your middle finger between your folds.
Acting on instinct, you threw your head back slightly and spread your legs as wide as the bathtub allowed. One of your hands was still caressing your cunt, meanwhile, the other one was stimulating your tits and nipples.
"Chris, baby.. pleaseㅡ" with eyes gradually sealing shut, you moaned his name as you imagined that it was his finger moving in and out of your throbbing cunt.
Inside your head, you replayed all the things he did to you the night before. How he rubbed his thumb against your clit; how he moved his fingers inside your cunt in scissoring motions; and how he curled his fingers to tease your most sensitive spot while assisting you to ride your high.
However, this time, no matter how much effort you put into it, you ended up feeling frustrated because you were not able to achieve what you wanted. You couldn't satisfy yourselfㅡ not even close to what Chris was capable of doing.
Truly, he understands your body better than you.
"Christopher! Please, please.. deeper please!" you relentlessly called his name, somehow wishing that it could help you to ease your frustration even just a little.
"You know what it did to me when you call my name like that?"
"Yes, it would make you fuck me harㅡ" the rest of your answer suddenly ceased in your throat when you realized what was happening. You weren't hallucinating when you heard his voice.
With eyes dilated in surprise, you instantly glanced over your shoulder and found him standing in the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest.
"What did I tell you this morning?" Chris questioned with a furrowed brow. His jaw seemed tense and he was glaring at you. "Did I say anything about allowing you to touch yourself when I am not home?"
Shit. You totally forgot that one.
"I.. I was just.." you stuttered and gulped thickly. You raked your brain to think about an excuse but your brain failed you.
"You were just impatient, aren't you, baby?" with a sinister smirk etched on his face, he made his way inside the bathroom while slowly unbuttoning his shirt. "Now, it's my turn."
"Your turn?" 
"Hmm," Chris replied with a low hum without looking at you as he rid himself of his clothes, leaving his god-like body thoroughly naked for your eyes to feast on. "And you have to watch me. No more touching yourself."
It took a few seconds for his ultimatum to fully sink into your headㅡ which then caused you to exclaim in shock. "What?!"
"You heard me," he curtly said before he stepped inside the bathtub and sat on the other edge, the opposite side of you.
From the way he was reacting and the tone he was talking, you knew he was a little disgruntled with what you did.
So, without saying another word, Chris began slowly stroking the tip of his cock while locking his gaze with yours.
"Chris.." you uttered softly, your attention solely focused on him. You felt your heart raced as you swallowed uneasily, unable to break your gaze from the intriguing sight before you.
"Look at how hard my cock is right now," Chris taunted you with a smirk before he spitted on his palm and began rubbing his length. His hand moved at a frustratingly slow pace, much to your dismay. "You wish you could have your mouth around my cock, hm? And choke on it?"
"Fuck," you groaned weakly and clenched your hands into tight fists. "Baby, please.."
"Please what?" Chris stared down at you with a raised brow and you swore to God that you felt the knots in your stomach tightened just by the condescending way he was looking at you.
"Can I suck you off?"
"You wish," he scoffed at your request as he pumped his cock faster. 
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walkswithmyfather · 6 months
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‭‭Psalm‬ ‭46:1‭-‬11‬ ‭(ESV‬‬). “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling. Selah There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy habitation of the Most High. God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved; God will help her when morning dawns. The nations rage, the kingdoms totter; he utters his voice, the earth melts. The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah Come, behold the works of the Lord, how he has brought desolations on the earth. He makes wars cease to the end of the earth; he breaks the bow and shatters the spear; he burns the chariots with fire. “Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!” The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah”
“Be Still” Advent Devotional 17th December ” - By Words of Hope:
“Be still, and know that I am God.” (‭‭Ps‬ ‭46:10)
“When I asked one of my Bible study friends what he most wanted for Christmas, he gave a wistful sigh and said: “Some stillness and silence would be nice.” How about you? Our Bible reading today suggests that God wants that for us even more than we want it ourselves. Psalm 46 begins with a promise that God will protect us in the hardest times, and it ends with a forceful command to be still.
I worry, sometimes, that I’m not cultivating that stillness. I’m not listening, not paying attention to God, not cultivating a quiet place on my insides where the voice of God can find resonance. I go skipping from one diversion to the next, skimming along on the surface of life and not going deep. Noise, hurry, and confusion seep into my life. Perhaps if I relied on God more as my refuge, he wouldn’t need to command me to be still and accept his help.
When I catch myself in a blur of worry and hurry I stop what I am doing, take a deep breath, and say to myself: “Be quiet. Be still. God is in control.” To be still doesn’t mean doing nothing. It means to stop acting like everything depends on you. It means to cease striving. The hymn writer Kathrina von Schlegel said it best: “Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know / His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.”
Today’ s Activity: Find a quiet place, by yourself. Turn off your phone and other distractions, and take five minutes to sit in the stillness.”
[Downloadable pdf advent calendar here. Picture by Anuj Radav at Unsplash]
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vickyvicarious · 9 months
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Lucy wrote her memorandum so no one else will get in trouble through her, and if I remember correctly Jonathan too at one point said that he's writing about what is happening as facts for someone else to benefit from if he perishes...
You have excellent timing, I was actually planning to talk about yesterday's Lucy/Jonathan parallels when I came back to see this. Yes! In fact, there are several lines which call back to Jonathan quotes:
"If this book should ever reach Mina before I do, let it bring my good-bye." Jonathan, 4 May "I write this and leave it to be seen, so that no one may by any chance get into trouble through me. This is an exact record of what took place to-night." Lucy, 17 September
I'm pretty sure Jonathan has a few other similar lines but this is the first one. And it becomes apparent that his journal is written for multiple purposes, including keeping his own sanity intact, serving as a record he can consult, a place he can be honest about his emotions... but from very early on it is also intended as a resource that can be seen by others. Jonathan's intention is for them to know the truth of what happened to him. But in a way at the end, the diary is also intended to serve the purpose of countermanding his own assistance in getting Dracula to England. He doesn't want anyone to 'get into trouble through him' either, it's what provokes him to make the shovel attack. (Alas, then he breaks down and his memory loss and trauma lead him to choose not to open it.)
And of course, Jonathan also has several different times he emphasizes that he is making an exact record. He's not the only one, of course. The Captain of the Demeter does the same. All three narrators who suffer from Dracula preying upon them for extended amounts of time take care to say this.
"I doubt; I fear; I think strange things, which I dare not confess to my own soul. God keep me, if only for the sake of those dear to me!" Jonathan, 5 May I have a dim half-remembrance of long, anxious times of waiting and fearing; darkness in which there was not even the pain of hope to make present distress more poignant: and then long spells of oblivion, and the rising back to life as a diver coming up through a great press of water. Since, however, Dr. Van Helsing has been with me, all this bad dreaming seems to have passed away; the noises that used to frighten me out of my wits—the flapping against the windows, the distant voices which seemed so close to me, the harsh sounds that came from I know not where and commanded me to do I know not what—have all ceased. [...] But I need not be watched; I am well enough to be left alone. Thank God for mother's sake, and dear Arthur's, and for all our friends who have been so kind! Lucy, 17 September
Lucy is more willing to confess to the strange things she thinks here, for the first time. Jonathan wasn't, in the beginning, and we aren't sure whether he ever fully did (he certainly had nightmares he wasn't talking about, regardless of how open he was about more confirmable experiences). But they both experience similar uncertainty about the reality of what is happening to them. They both suffer memory loss - at different points, maybe in somewhat different ways, but also maybe not that different? They also both hope to be saved for the sake of those who love them.
Something made me start up, a low, piteous howling of dogs somewhere far below in the valley, which was hidden from my sight. Louder it seemed to ring in my ears, and the floating motes of dust to take new shapes to the sound as they danced in the moonlight. I felt myself struggling to awake to some call of my instincts; nay, my very soul was struggling, and my half-remembered sensibilities were striving to answer the call. I was becoming hypnotised! Jonathan, 24 June I kept my eyes fixed on the window, but the wolf drew his head back, and a whole myriad of little specks seemed to come blowing in through the broken window, and wheeling and circling round like the pillar of dust that travellers describe when there is a simoon in the desert. I tried to stir, but there was some spell upon me, and dear mother's poor body, which seemed to grow cold already—for her dear heart had ceased to beat—weighed me down; and I remembered no more for a while. The time did not seem long, but very, very awful, till I recovered consciousness again. Somewhere near, a passing bell was tolling; the dogs all round the neighbourhood were howling; and in our shrubbery, seemingly just outside, a nightingale was singing. Lucy, 17 September
Both Jonathan and Lucy are hypnotized by vampires in their swirling specks of dust form. Both begin to come back to their senses as they hear dogs howling.
"If there were any one to talk to I could bear it, but there is no one. I have only the Count to speak with, and he!—I fear I am myself the only living soul within the place." Jonathan, 8 May "What shall I do? what can I do? How can I escape from this dreadful thing of night and gloom and fear?" Jonathan, 24 June "What am I to do? what am I to do? I am back in the room with mother. I cannot leave her, and I am alone, save for the sleeping servants, whom some one has drugged. Alone with the dead!" Lucy, 17 September
They both speak of being alone with the dead, though in Lucy's case she doesn't realize the full extent of the 'dead' who are with her. But both bring this up in the context of being unable to speak/communicate with other people, and in both cases this is because Dracula has deliberately isolated them. By trapping Jonathan in the castle, by drugging the maids...
I included the second Jonathan quote because I love how despite this completely understandable despair and uncertainty, both he and Lucy take action almost immediately after writing those lines. Jonathan decides to make the climb through the window the very next day, and Lucy resolves to hide her memorandum in order to make sure it is found. They both have very limited resources/options, but neither sinks into despair for too long. They fight till the end.
"The chances are desperate, but my need is more desperate still. I shall risk it. At the worst it can only be death; and a man's death is not a calf's, and the dreaded Hereafter may still be open to me. God help me in my task! Good-bye, Mina, if I fail; good-bye, my faithful friend and second father; good-bye, all, and last of all Mina!" Jonathan, 25 June "At least God's mercy is better than that of these monsters, and the precipice is steep and high. At its foot a man may sleep—as a man. Good-bye, all! Mina!" Jonathan, 30 June "I feel I am dying of weakness, and have barely strength to write, but it must be done if I die in the doing. [...] Good-bye, dear Arthur, if I should not survive this night. God keep you, dear, and God help me!" Lucy, 17 September
They both fully understand that they are facing death, and in fact are more likely to die than to survive. Both are certain the risk is worth it and press forward despite the danger/their fear or weakness. Both fear something worse than death happening to them, and appeal to god for a death as a human... though Lucy's pleas are less explicit about this because she doesn't remember enough to be able to verbalize any distinct other possibility.
And of course, when convinced they are about to die, both of them dedicate their final words to their loved ones.
.
And that's just the quotes that stuck out to me. There's also other things, like:
A shared feeling of inevitability (in Jonathan's case, externally imposed by Dracula's deadline/the threat of the vampire ladies; in Lucy's, it comes as a result of her long health struggles and the impending danger tonight she cannot stave off alone)
Being menaced by wolves under Dracula's command, who don't actively hurt either narrator but do serve to trap them in with him for the night
Everything about their nightmares, especially the timing of Jonathan's nightmares being specifically mentioned on the same day as Lucy's nightmare becomes a waking one
Each of their avenues of protection/escape being eroded or blocked one by one, leading them to lose hope for their survival. Sort of overlaps with that shared feeling of inevitability, but I wanna emphasize how Dracula is intentionally cutting them off repeatedly as they try various things.
I mentioned the dogs already, but Lucy's two encounters with Dracula in swirling speck form echo Jonathan's two close calls with the vampire ladies who first showed that form, except Jonathan was saved both times and Lucy wasn't. Even when she came out of the trance for a while, it was too late.
It was a lot.
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rosebancroft · 26 days
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Yearning:
They said I overreacted when I yearned for death, finding an inexplicable allure in the metallic smell of blood and the uncertain dismay that the world may thrust upon me. The unknown darkness or light that will consume me once my spirit fades is an enigma I ponder endlessly. And by God, despite my deep love for Him, I wonder what lies within. Whether I face angels or the devil himself, what am I to feel? The burning throat of thirst or the full adoration of a world beyond human comprehension?
Who can judge me for questioning such feelings? After all, we are mortal. We cling to what we can control yet yearn desperately for what eludes us. Greedy, we all are—so what if I'm greedy for feeling? Greedy to know, to taste the metallic essence of such dismay, displaying to me a golden chime of what ceases to exist. This insatiable curiosity drives me to the edge, a desire to pierce the veil and understand the unfathomable mysteries that lie beyond life’s fragile boundaries.
In my yearning, there is a defiance, a refusal to accept the superficial comforts of ignorance. The metallic scent of blood is not merely a symbol of demise but a reminder of the raw, visceral nature of existence. It calls to me, a siren song that speaks of deeper truths, of experiences untainted by the mundane trivialities of everyday life. It is in this yearning that I find a twisted solace, a connection to the primal essence of being.
The world, with its rigid judgments and narrow perceptions, cannot fathom the depth of my longing. They label me as overreactive, failing to see the profound quest that drives me. It is not mere morbidity but a search for authenticity, a craving for an encounter with the ultimate reality. In my pursuit, I challenge the boundaries of human understanding, venturing into realms that few dare to explore. But I too am greedy that no one should know but I, and who is to blame but my mind?
As I stand at the precipice, I am consumed by the duality of existence—drawn to the light that promises divine embrace, yet equally captivated by the darkness that offers a different kind of revelation. The unknown beckons with its mysteries, and I am willing to risk everything to unravel its secrets. For in this pursuit, I find a purpose that transcends the ordinary, a mission that elevates my existence to something more than mere survival.
In this insatiable greed for knowledge and experience, I confront the very essence of what it means to be human. It is a journey fraught with peril, yet also filled with the potential for profound discovery. The metallic tang of blood and the allure of dismay are but gateways to deeper understanding, symbols of the ultimate truths that lie just beyond the reach of mortal comprehension.
Thus, I embrace my greed, my unquenchable thirst for what lies beyond. For in this relentless quest, I am not merely seeking death but striving to grasp the full spectrum of existence, to understand the beauty and terror that define our mortal coil. And in this pursuit, I find a strange, undeniable sense of fulfillment—a testament to the boundless capacity of the human spirit to seek, to question, and to transcend.
The thoughts that plague me are not just idle musings but a testament to my relentless pursuit of meaning. Each ponderous moment is an exploration, a journey into the depths of my soul. The blood that flows, the scent that intoxicates, is a reminder of the life force that courses through me, a visceral connection to the very essence of life and death.
I am not afraid to confront these dark musings, to delve into the shadows where others fear to tread. My mind is a battlefield, a place where angels and demons clash, where the sacred and the profane intertwine. It is in this crucible of conflict that I seek to forge my understanding, to find the answers that elude me in the light of day.
The world may see me as overreactive, as someone lost in a sea of morbid thoughts, but they do not understand the depth of my quest, that I revel in. I am driven by a need to understand, to feel, to experience every facet of existence. My yearning is not a death wish but a life wish—a desire to fully embrace the spectrum of human experience, to find the beauty in the darkness and the light.
I yearn to comprehend, fully aware that such understanding would shatter me utterly. It would tear open my chest, exposing my heart to be licked by the cruel tongue of revelation, akin to the release of a forbidden pleasure. Like a taboo flesh begging to be scratched, yearning for the ecstasy of a moan. That sensation, that relentless desire, is the quest for understanding. And with every step closer to this elusive truth, I feel an urge to strip myself of all coverings and stand naked in the cold forest, heedless of the hunters' eyes, of the wolves, of whatever creatures might lurk there. To be opened up by tender fingers, to have my ribs pried apart, and to expose my very essence. That feeling, that unholy craving, is the pursuit of the meaning of death. A knowledge so profound that even the greatest philosophers have failed to grasp it, a truth that only I can perceive or atleast hope for.
I want to be consumed by death. I long to feel its teeth sinking into my flesh, to experience the ultimate surrender. And deep down, I know that death seeks me with the same fervent intensity. This macabre dance between us is my greatest secret and my deepest desire. To understand death is to embrace the ultimate taboo, to succumb to a primal urge that defies logic and reason. It is an intimate, terrifying knowledge, a forbidden fruit that tempts me with its promise of absolute understanding.
As I inch closer to this forbidden knowledge, the impulse to cast off my earthly bindings grows stronger. I envision myself, naked and vulnerable, in the heart of the forest, surrounded by the indifferent gaze of predators. The cold air would bite at my skin, a prelude to the greater pain that awaits. The fingers that would peel back my flesh, exposing my ribs, are both tender and cruel. This act of opening myself up, of laying bare my very soul, is the ultimate sacrifice in the pursuit of truth.
The understanding I seek is not just an intellectual exercise; it is a visceral, bodily experience. It is the surrender to a force greater than myself, an acknowledgment of my insignificance in the face of the unknown. To understand death is to embrace the inevitability of my own demise, to welcome the dissolution of my being with open arms. It is a journey into the heart of darkness, where the lines between pleasure and pain, life and death, blur into a single, overwhelming sensation.
This pursuit of understanding is both my greatest strength and my ultimate downfall. It drives me forward, compels me to strip away the layers of illusion and confront the raw, naked truth. Yet it also threatens to destroy me, to tear apart the very fabric of my being. But in this destruction, I find a perverse kind of freedom, a release from the constraints of existence.
To be devoured by death is to achieve a state of transcendence, to merge with the infinite and become one with the cosmos. It is a return to the primordial chaos from which all life emerges, a final, glorious surrender to the unknown. And in this surrender, I hope to find the ultimate understanding, the answer to the question that has haunted humanity since the dawn of time.
I embrace this dark desire, this yearning to be consumed by the very thing that I seek to understand. For in this embrace, I find a purpose, a meaning that eludes the brightest minds and the most learned scholars. I am prepared to offer myself to death, to let it devour me, so that I might glimpse the truth that lies beyond the veil. And in this act of ultimate surrender, I hope to achieve the understanding that I so desperately crave. Oh how I want to be devoured by death, and I know, repeating once more, with what it shows me, it seeks me the same.
In the end, I am left with my questions, my insatiable curiosity, and my unrelenting drive to understand. Whether I find the answers I seek or not, the journey itself is a testament to my humanity, to my unquenchable spirit. I am a seeker, a dreamer, and in my pursuit of the unknown, I find a strange, profound peace no matter what lies to be. It breaks me, and fulfills.
-Bancroft
@lyralu91
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inthisrace · 11 days
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Behold, Cease Striving!
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Many people believe that serving God is a hard task. I've held onto this belief for years. The idea of reaching out to others, immersing myself in the Bible, and fully committing to Christianity seems like a difficult challenge. I often find myself wondering what more I can do to honor the Lord. However, I must confess that I've never truly intended to seek His guidance. Instead, my thoughts and reflections have remained more of a personal contemplation rather than a sincere conversation with Him. I've never genuinely asked God what He wants from me; rather, I've created my own plans and assumed they align with His will. I've mistakenly believed that merely performing actions in His name is enough to please Him.
Eventually, I found myself feeling completely drained. I couldn't even muster up the energy to keep going with the tasks I had set out to do. It became clear to me that I have a habit of starting things with a lot of excitement, only to lose interest as time goes on. This constant cycle left me feeling overwhelmed with guilt, as if I could never quite make God happy. Feeling frustrated and in need of direction, I finally turned to God and asked, "What am I supposed to do?" I was genuinely seeking an answer, but none seemed to come. My mind was filled with so many thoughts that I couldn't really focus on my desire to serve the Lord. I tried different strategies and approaches, hoping to prevent myself from stumbling over and over again. Then, finally, He got through to me. He said, "Behold, the Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world."
For many nights, I couldn't shake off that statement. It was like, "Yes, I've heard that many times since my childhood: 'Behold the Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world,'" but I never truly understood it. I tried asking God, but in the end, I also tried to provide the answers to my questions myself. Until I surrendered. So I asked Him, "What does that mean?" And a still, small voice whispered from within, "Behold, cease striving." Immediately, I searched what "behold" means and found out that it actually means "gaze at." Immediately, I stopped everything, got onto my knees, bowed very low because of the realization of how much I have taken Him for granted over the years, and failed to catch His gaze.
When the verse from the book of John declares, "Behold! The Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world!" (John 1:29 NKJV), it's more of a call to "Cease what you are doing!" What are we so busy about? We can be in the church, busy doing things for His kingdom, but we forget about the King. The way Mary left everything just to be seated at the feet of Jesus is what He wants from us. Martha could be so busy preparing things for the Lord but lost sight of the most important thing. It's not about doing things for the Lord that He requires from us; it's about forsaking things upon hearing the sound of His voice. So, Behold!
Indeed, Behold! Jesus might be standing before us, yet we fail to recognize His presence because our gaze is fixed on other things. So, behold. "Behold, the Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world," declared John the Baptist. We are called to behold and cease striving this time, to halt everything once and for all. We need not struggle to feel His presence; but, we can yield to the Holy Spirit by fixing our gaze on Jesus and never look away.
He is the Lamb of God, the perfect sacrifice, the most worthy offering for you and me. Despite never feeling worthy of His love, I ended up being changed through the blood of the Lamb. The most holy sacrifice laid down His life for us. It's so ironic knowing that people like us, unworthy as we are, had to be saved by the only worthy person to die on the cross just to restore His perfect will over our lives.
So, loving Jesus isn't a burdensome task; it's not a complicated process because He has already prepared the way for us. He plans each step for us and waits for us to look to Him. We need to stay focused, as Isaiah said, to make a clear path for the Lord, even when life gets tough. When we do this, we understand His love and purpose for us even better.
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godlovesyousoiloveyou · 6 months
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Hello! im the anon that wanted to ask about orthodoxy. i know this will likely be very difficult to answer, but are you able to tell me a bit about how saints play a role? if not, perhaps you could speak on your personal relationships with/thoughts on the saints? and please dont apologize, your offer of information was more than kind and im very grateful!
St. Nikolai Velimirovich said, "If a person wants to get an idea about the pyramids of Egypt, he must either trust those who have been in immediate proximity to the pyramids, or he must get next to them himself. There is no third option. In the same way a person can get an impression of God: he must either trust those who have stood and stand in immediate proximity to God, or he must take pains to come into such proximity himself."
I am a prodigal, an unworthy sinner, an ungrateful and wicked servant. I deserve not to look upon the face of God being such a terrible person that I am. If I dared to come near Him at the wedding feast, my clothing will accuse me for it is not a wedding garment. The saints are important because they are people who now stand beside the throne of God and they intercede for us.
1 Kingdoms 13:28 "Far be it from me to sin against the Lord in ceasing to pray for you; but I will serve the Lord and show you the good and right way."
Genesis 20:3-7 God tells Abimelech to ask Abraham to pray for him, otherwise he is a dead man for taking Sarah from him)
Exodus 8:4-6, 8:24-25, 9:28-29, 10:16-18, 32:31-32, Pharaoh asking Moses to pray for him and Moses praying for Pharaoh
Numbers 12:10-13, 14:11-19 Aaron begging Moses to pray for Miriam to be healed of her leprosy and Moses interceding for the Israelites before God
Deuteronomy 9:20, 9:25-26 Moses praying for Aaron and the Israelites
1 Kingdoms 7:8, 13:19 Samuel interceding for the Israelite to be victorious over the Philistines, Israelites asking Samuel to pray for them so the Lord is not angry that they asked a king for themselves
3 Kingdoms 13:6 King Jeroboam asks the man of God to pray for him to God to restore his hand that withered away and he prays and it's restored immediately
3 Kingdoms 17:20-23 Elijah prays over the widow's dead son's body and he is brought back to life
God is not the God of the dead but of the living, Christ said in the book of Matthew. The saints are not dead, they stand before the throne of God interceding for us.
Throughout the history of the church, there have been so many saints who lived venerable lives, sacrificing their lives in the name of Christ as brave martyrs (like St. Eleftherios who is celebrated today), saints who helped so many people in their afflictions (St. John the Merciful who gave away all he had to the poor), saints who performed many miracles (some recent ones are St. Nektarios who healed the sick, St. Porphyrios who was blind but prophesied so many things about the future, St. Paisios the Athonite, St. Joseph the Hesychast, etc.).
Here, in our current life, in this present day and hour, we in the Church who strive to love God are, in Orthodox theology, considered the Church Militant. We who love God are all soldiers of Christ and being alive on this earth and striving to do God's will, we are always battling against the forces of the enemy, the evil one. The saints who have struggled to love Christ and won the struggle, living until the end of their earthly lives as faithful Christians, they are considered to be the Church Triumphant. We are striving to be triumphant like them, triumphant against the passions, temptations, and addictions; against pride, selfishness, gluttony, immorality, and all sins.
One particular saint who has helped me a lot is St. Xenia of St. Petersburg. She was homeless, she was considered a fool-for-Christ. She sought not earthly glory and she hid her virtues so well. She was so poor, not because she did not have money, but because whatever money she had, she gave to others. She sacrificed her comforts so that God would comfort her. St. Paisios the Athonite said, "When we cease seeking consolation from man, then we will receive consolation from God." Such people who have achieved it are people like St. Xenia.
I had been struggling with finding a job for years and praying to have a home to call my own. I am not an educated person, I did not even graduate high school. I did not even have a house to go, I feared I would be homeless. St. Xenia helped me get a house. I prayed a few akathists to her and in the same month, I received a house as an unexpected gift from my in-laws. I have received a lot of help from other saints as well, St. Xenia is just one of the recent ones.
Anyway, this was a really long answer, hopefully it's not too boring and if it is, I'm sorry. lol.
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motherdolores · 1 month
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Behold! For six blessed months, hath mine abode been in the chambers of rehabilitation. Yet, time and its relentless march, though the hours doth pass. But lo! Organic sustenance, a repast whereupon I cannot sup without the wretched upheaval of my innards. Throughout the day, I partake of doses of Olanzapine, and within my soul doth, resonate the soothing balm of its message. Still, the yearning to flee the anguish doth persist, though my mind be a dam against the flow. And as I lay upon yonder hospital chair, I am watched, whilst I wither away in silent lamentation. In the night's embrace, I fancy myself a specter, seeking escape through the winding passages of my veins... Despite all that has befallen me during my rehabilitation, I have conceived the notion of crafting a cradle of pills to soothe the physical and mental wounds I have inflicted upon myself. Sadly, I cannot swallow the antidepressant life of Serotonin, yet in the wee hours, the doctors cease not to slumber, eager to discern the whispers I utter and the words I inscribe in my diary of withered blooms. I have witnessed the brightest and most intelligent youths laid low by mental afflictions, borne of the myriad harms we endure, thus feeling a semblance of humanization. Some souls are of angelic love and benevolent hearts, while others shall not deign to acknowledge your sentiments... I yearn for someone to taste the coursing rivers within my veins! Let them glean the meaning of the sorrowful catastrophe that rages within me. I have heard tell of being branded psychotic, and my heart, suffused with a bittersweet pang, for it seems no one has truly comprehended me.
At this present moment, I harbor no desire to engage in discourse, though my yearning for the written word remains steadfast. I have endeavored to flee the tumultuous confines of the hospital, yet there exists within me a force that doth restrain. In turns, I find amusement and ennui, and to the eyes of astonishment, I release the torrents of tears that flow from the depths of my soul. I have beheld individuals older than I, ensnared upon the arduous path of cerebral affliction, and all I have done in their company is weep amidst the small garden of plastic blooms. I have offered my prayers upon the rosary, beseeching only for the chance to vanish into a realm where disappointment holds no sway. Nevertheless, I have never relinquished hope that my mother might perceive, with her heart, the strength that sustains me through this torturous ordeal. O, dear mother, from your womb and ethereal heart, I deeply lament having fallen once more into the abyss. I vowed, from the most divine sorrows of my heart, to vanquish this misery, yet the mental turmoil begins to allure me gradually. Pray for me in your abode, and I pledge to kneel in transcendental agony... I behold the false flowers in that diminutive space and yearn to ingest, so it may reach my stomach in a state of serenity. And know I will relish it, craving to taste the cruelty! But I rue being born a "masochist," as the malevolent serenade claims. I tread, pondering how to become a heavenly ghost, to safeguard my soul, though I fail to cherish it... Refuse to belong in a world where one must strive to end their own life. I have beseeched God solely for happiness and peace. Yet, after months of battle and being utterly wounded, I refrain from shedding tears, speaking, or even praying for misguided mortals. The pills shall become my preferred overdose... Slowly embracing that warm embrace of death, yet there are things I still yearn to inscribe.
Mighty is the duality, and every endeavor is in a state of decay. Once more, I have beseeched and knelt for the personal forgiveness of my shadowy sins. I am not the perfect daughter that my father desired to survive in some civil or worldly wars. With all the conditional love that I gave to my dear father from the most putrefied part of my heart, I felt it was a fleeting state. A love with brief explanations, longing for the last message to find the saving light again by a father who never showed affection towards thee, and it is a pain... I do stab myself and the weight of my body that I have obtained during my childhood hurts, though it be a grievous wound, it will not hurt as much as having muscle or fat that thou dost not wish to have to survive... It is always the same with me; I do not take my medicines, I observe my sinister bones in that mirror of rehabilitation, I have written poetry that in the end culminates in tragedies, I do not ingest the perfect quantity of food that the human being needs, I only walk and yearn for the portraits of my parents in this place, I see the television and appreciate a nun and a monk weeping with all their heart when they speak the healing words of 'Matthew 6:25,' and in the nights, I remain somnambulant in the hospital chair. Shall it be known if my mother will save my wounds spilled by my sufferings that shall be of eternal judgment. Even in my life, I desire the praise of my father, but he hath forsaken me... And in the sacred love of my mother, I have found some salvation, although in my sorrows, I never observed it. I lament it greatly...
Lamentation, I find myself ensnared in a stage where the stench of decay looms ominously. My body forsakes me, rendering me unable to walk, to eat, nay, even to think... I beseech God for the wisdom and aid to deliver me from this mental abyss. I do not seek punishment, yet I shall endure the burden of this malignant desire that festers within my mind. It is a challenge beyond thy comprehension, to convey the struggles I have borne through the passage of years. My existence has revolved around sustenance, though I yearn to forsake it, to revel in the twisted pleasure of a macabre dance amidst a music box wrought from corpses. Some shall never grasp the moment of my fading, yet gradually, the truth shall unveil itself... And my longing shall fade, buried beneath a deluge of tears and screams. I can hear thy words, I have witnessed the suffering of others, abandoned to their plight. But what was I?... A sorrowful porcelain figure crafted by an artist who depicted the spillage of our blood, and the romance of life, death, and human bones. I have longed for death, though it eludes the dreams I cherished in my youth. My love for the creations nurtured in rehabilitation has withered into naught but rust. With a heart weighed down by sinister despair, I choose to crucify my pain...
Mother Dolores, "Homestead Rehabilitation."
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orthodoxadventure · 6 months
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Psalm 35 (NKJV)
Plead my cause, O Lord, with those who strive with me; Fight against those who fight against me. Take hold of shield and buckler, And stand up for my help. Also draw out the spear, And stop those who pursue me. Say to my soul, “I am your salvation.”
Let those be put to shame and brought to dishonor Who seek after my life; Let those be turned back and brought to confusion Who plot my hurt. Let them be like chaff before the wind, And let the angel of the Lord chase them. Let their way be dark and slippery, And let the angel of the Lord pursue them. For without cause they have hidden their net for me in a pit, Which they have dug without cause for my life. Let destruction come upon him unexpectedly, And let his net that he has hidden catch himself; Into that very destruction let him fall.
And my soul shall be joyful in the Lord; It shall rejoice in His salvation. All my bones shall say, “Lord, who is like You, Delivering the poor from him who is too strong for him, Yes, the poor and the needy from him who plunders him?”
Fierce witnesses rise up; They ask me things that I do not know. They reward me evil for good, To the sorrow of my soul. But as for me, when they were sick, My clothing was sackcloth; I humbled myself with fasting; And my prayer would return to my own heart. I paced about as though he were my friend or brother; I bowed down heavily, as one who mourns for his mother.
But in my adversity they rejoiced And gathered together; Attackers gathered against me, And I did not know it; They tore at me and did not cease; With ungodly mockers at feasts They gnashed at me with their teeth.
Lord, how long will You look on? Rescue me from their destructions, My precious life from the lions. I will give You thanks in the great assembly; I will praise You among many people.
Let them not rejoice over me who are wrongfully my enemies; Nor let them wink with the eye who hate me without a cause. For they do not speak peace, But they devise deceitful matters Against the quiet ones in the land. They also opened their mouth wide against me, And said, “Aha, aha! Our eyes have seen it.”
This You have seen, O Lord; Do not keep silence. O Lord, do not be far from me. Stir up Yourself, and awake to my vindication, To my cause, my God and my Lord. Vindicate me, O Lord my God, according to Your righteousness; And let them not rejoice over me. Let them not say in their hearts, “Ah, so we would have it!” Let them not say, “We have swallowed him up.”
Let them be ashamed and brought to mutual confusion Who rejoice at my hurt; Let them be clothed with shame and dishonor Who exalt themselves against me.
Let them shout for joy and be glad, Who favor my righteous cause; And let them say continually, “Let the Lord be magnified, Who has pleasure in the prosperity of His servant.” And my tongue shall speak of Your righteousness And of Your praise all the day long.
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albertfinch · 4 months
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February 21, 2024 - Exhortation
Shake off every hope that is not the hope of Christ in you! Shake off despair, let go of striving in your own strength, and push through the crowd of your own hopeless thoughts so that you can grab hold of the very hem of His garment -- then see what happens.
"Cease striving and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth" (Psalms 46:10).
This wrestle of "strivings" (striving to enter His rest -- let go of striving out of human strength) will cause your soul to truly enter the rest of the Lord. You will witness and come to KNOW that He is God, and He will show Himself as the God of your life.
As you humbly acknowledge your weakness, this will be the very place where the power of Christ will come to rest. The barren places will become the womb of miracles. The impossibilities will become the landing strip for awe and wonder. And the desolate lands will drip with new wine.
You must push through the place of putting confidence in your own strengths and abilities (or in anything that is not Christ), then you will enter a spiritual rest that heals your soul and keeps you focused on bearing fruit that remains for His advancing Kingdom through your Christ calling.
ALBERT FINCH MINISTRY
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unitedbyprayer · 5 months
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(via He Is Our Savior And Friend)
He Is Our Savior And Friend
https://www.unitedbyprayer.com/united-by-prayer-wall/he-is-our-savior-and-friend
What a blessed comfort this verse has been to multitudes of believers in Christ, down through the ages, who have rested on these words and had their hearts stilled in the presence of the Lord. He is our God Who satisfies our years with good things, and renews our youth like the eagle. He performs righteous deeds and judgments for all who are oppressed. The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in lovingkindness. He Is Our Savior And Friend. He is our hope and strength and He will be exalted, for it is He who has made us, and not we ourselves, we are His people and the sheep of His pasture. Although the nations rage like the billows of the sea and the people imagine a vain thing against the Lord God Almighty, we are called to be still in the presence of the Lord and to know Him in our heart by faith, with thanksgiving. May we be still in His presence, cease from all our strivings, and be at peace in His company Whom to know is life eternal.
He says, “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”
Our United Prayer:
Dear Lord, we praise You that Your Word stands fast forever and ever and that Your precious promises encourage us to rest in Your love and drink deeply from the Rock of our salvation. Draw near to every member of Christ’s Body, and protect Your people against the increasing roar of the nations. We pray for Your return, when Your name will be exalted throughout all the earth. Then all the nations will know that You are God. In Jesus' name we Pray, AMEN.
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ISMENE:
What is it then? You seem to hint at some dark tale.
ANTIGONE:
Yes. In his order for the burial of our brothers has not Creon honored the one, outraged the other? To Eteocles, they say, he paid each proper rite and custom and laid him in the ground, to be in honor with the dead below. But as for poor dead Polynices' body, they say he has proclaimed among our people that none shall hide it in a grave and mourn, but let it lie unwept, unburied, welcome provision for the birds who watch for such-like prey. These are, they say, the orders our good Creon has proclaimed for you and me — yes, even for me! — and now comes hither to make plain his will to such as do not know. Nor does he treat the matter lightly. But let one do what he forbids, and death by public stoning shall await him in the city. So it stands now, and you must quickly show if you are rightly born or the base child of noble parents.
ISMENE:
But, my poor sister, if it has come to this, what further can I do to help or hinder?
ANTIGONE:
Think, will you share my toil and strife?
ISMENE:
In what bold deed? What is your plan?
ANTIGONE:
To try if you with this hand's help will raise that body.
ISMENE:
What! Bury him? In opposition to the State?
ANTIGONE:
My brother, though, and yours. If you refuse, I will be found no traitor.
ISMENE:
Reckless! When Creon too forbids?
ANTIGONE:
'T is not for him to keep me from my own.
ISMENE:
Alas! consider, sister, how our father died, hated and scorned, because of self-exposed offences doing his eyes a violence with his own hand. And then his mother and his wife — ah, double title! — with a twisted cord ended her life in shame. A third disaster came. Our pair of brothers in a single day, like wretched suicides, wrought by one common ruin by each other's hand. And now once more, when we are the only ones still left, think what a far worse fate we two shall meet if we, defying law, transgress our rulers' will and power. Nay, rather let us bear mid that we are women, so not fit to strive with men. Moreover, since we are the subjects of those stronger than ourselves, we must obey these orders and orders harsher still. I, then, beseeching those those beneath the earth to grant me pardon, seeing I am compelled, will bow to those in power. To act beyond one's sphere shows little wisdom.
ANTIGONE:
I will not urge you. No! Nor if hereafter you desire, shall you with my consent give any aid. Be what you will, and I will bury him. Good it would be to die in doing so. Dearly shall I lie with him, with my dear, after my pious sin. And longer must I satisfy those there below than people here, for there I shall lie ever. But you, if you think well, keep disregarding what the gods regard!
ISMENE:
I mean no disregard. But to defy the State — it is not in me.
ANTIGONE:
Make that, then, your excuse! I will go raise a grave over my dearest brother.
ISMENE:
O my poor sister, how I fear for you!
ANTIGONE:
Be not disturbed for me. Let your own course be true.
ISMENE:
At least do not reveal what you have done. Keep it a secret. I will hide it too.
ANTIGONE:
Ha? Speak it out! Far more my enemy if silent than if telling it to all!
ISMENE:
Hot heart and chilling deeds!
ANTIGONE:
How I please those I most ought to please.
ISMENE:
If you succeed. But you desire what cannot be.
ANTIGONE:
Why, then, when strength shall fail me, I will cease.
ISMENE:
Best not pursue at all what cannot be.
ANTIGONE:
Speak thus, and I shall hate you. And he who died will haye you, — rightly, too. Nay, leave me and my rash design to meet our doom, for I shall meet none equal to not dying nobly.
ISMENE:
Go, then, if you must. And yet of this be sure, that mad as is your going, dearly are you loved by those you love.
[Exeunt.]
The Antigone of Sophocles, translated with introduction and notes by George Herbert Palmer, Alford Professor of Philosophy in Harvard University
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walkswithmyfather · 8 months
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Psalm 46:1-7, 10-11 (NASB). “God is our refuge and strength, A very ready help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth shakes And the mountains slip into the heart of the sea; Though its waters roar and foam, Though the mountains quake at its swelling pride. Selah
There is a river whose streams make the city of God happy, The holy dwelling places of the Most High. God is in the midst of her, she will not be moved; God will help her when morning dawns. The nations made an uproar, the kingdoms tottered; He raised His voice, the earth quaked. The Lord of armies is with us; The God of Jacob is our stronghold. Selah
“Stop striving and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted on the earth.” The Lord of armies is with us; The God of Jacob is our stronghold. Selah”
“Be Still and Rest” By In Touch Ministries:
“God is with you in every moment; you can talk to Him and relax in His presence anytime.”
“Today’s passage says, “God is our refuge and strength, a very ready help in trouble … stop striving and know that I am God” (vv. 1, 10). God invites us to cease striving—to “be still” in other translations—and know that He is God. But that’s not easy to do when we feel stressed out.
Everyone experiences stress. Sometimes the load we bear is one of constant struggle; other times it can be an excess of good things stretching us beyond our capacity. Frequently, though, life is a mix of things we’d rather not tackle and some that we desire—such as a school deadline, a new baby, a promotion at work, a weighty decision we have to make ... Through it all, how do we manage our stress in a fruitful way?
Often, what we need to do is pause to rest in Christ’s loving presence. It’s tempting to think of pausing as something we can do only when the conditions are perfect—the right environment, amount of time, or part of the day. But remember that God is with us in every moment. So carving out even the briefest break in our busy schedule can make for a meaningful encounter with Him.
The next time you feel stress building, give yourself a moment to reset. Say a prayer, breathe the air God has given you, and simply rest. The more often you do this, the more of Him you’ll experience—and the less of your worries.”
[Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash]
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dk-thrive · 5 months
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It’s a love that doesn’t diminish.
Every dog lover understands, for we know all too well how our dogs love us. My mini bernedoodle, Sugaree, meets me at the door when she hears me on the front porch steps. She jumps in anticipation—all four legs catching air—until I enter the hallway. It’s a love that doesn’t diminish.
This is my welcome every weeknight when I come home from work. I haven’t split the atom, ended world hunger or even brought her a new chew toy, yet I am honored like Pompey the Great in his third Roman triumph.
This nightly greeting has two effects on me. First, it makes me want to be better, to be worthy of such love. This reflection, in turn, helps me to love God, whose perfect love never ceases to draw me out from my own imperfections, from the man I am to the man I should be.
Second, it reminds me how silly it is to think I can love too many people or anyone too much. If loving is willing the good of the other, then there is no upper limit to it. This insight helps me strive to love my neighbor and to be an instrument of peace. Sugaree is my role model, as Bear was Paul’s.
— Mike Kerrigan, from "Our Dog, Who Art in Heaven" (wsj.com, January 3, 2023)
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banji-effect · 8 months
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Enough of this “is eating McDonalds in his car a date.” Ladies, if he’s not pledging his chivalric honor to you, kick his ass to the curb:
And when she whom I revered had ceased speaking, I made answer, “Ah, my Lady! Almost does it kill me to hear you speak thus. The love, the goodness, and the favour which you extend to me, should well content me, and I trust that you will never imagine that I am not willing to agree to all that you command. And believe me truly that, as I wrote in answer to your letter, I make promise unto you on my oath—and in this I perjure myself not—I would that I should never be had in honour, but should always be held disgraced, if that ever, for a single day, in deed, word, or thought, I should do or think aught, either in secret or openly, the which could displease you, and you may put me to the proof in such manner as you will, for never will aught that your heart desires be unwelcome to me, nor will it befall that aught which may be your wish can grieve me, and thus it behoves me not to distress me concerning this, for are you not my loved one? Is it not meet that I demean me according to your will? When I shall be moved to do otherwise, may I be destroyed, body and soul, and brought to ruin! Good God! how satisfied I ought to be since I perceive that you love me, and call me your dear friend! I possess that which I coveted, and naught beside do I strive after, and I think myself well recompensed. And as you are disposed alway to love me thus, I indeed perceive that there is no guile or malice in your heart, and I bethink me, moreover, that I shall do such service, that I shall be yet more loved by you. Therefore command me even now, for I am your liegeman, and my heart is wholly pledged to you, fair one. Declare now your pleasure, or send me whither you will, and I will go, and will obey in all things, without opposing your humour. Thus you can do as you will with me more than I know how to tell, and may God watch over you, and reward you abundantly for that you thus make promise wholly to love me. I ought not to speak ill of love, the which puts me in the way of attaining to such great joy. Therefore, fair and kind one, I give you humble thanks, for henceforth I shall wear the lover's crown, and I shall put away from me every evil habit, and take virtue into my service, the which I would seek above all things, in order to be like unto the valiant. Thus will you make me a wise and prudent man. In fine, sweet Lady, I could not be more happy, however much I might say concerning it.”
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