#But because of that rbs would be sincerely appreciated | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

yuzurins · 11 months

Text

# reluctant to love

desc: in which rin writes a long essay proclaiming his long suppressed love for you

warnings: not proofread… lots of rambling, maybe ooc, itoshi brothers are not estranged, minuscule amount of angst but majority is fluff, some curse words here and there, rin is still at blue lock btw!

rbs and interactions are appreciated !!

————————————————————————

‘dear y/n,

i am writing this letter to inform you that i have taken a liking to you for a while now and would like to—‘

————————————————————————

rin grumbles to himself as he scribbles out the complete trash of a confession that he had just wrote.

he doesn’t even know why he decided to take this approach at all. it all started because isagi and bachira told him that, “he was beating around the bush,” and “he’d probably win the world cup before being able to utter a word in front of them.”

so of course, rin said some very harsh words in response, leading to isagi challenging him to confess to you before the next match (that was in 72 hours) with his football career on the line.

which is how he found himself sitting at his desk after practice, spinning his pencil around trying to write a stupid love letter for his best friend.

because in the words of bachira, “everyone loves poetic men!”

despite immediately denying the words of his friends, deep down he knew damn well that they were completely right. if he wasn’t forced to, he would probably quit football before ever speaking about his feelings out loud.

but because the itoshi rin can’t risk his ego and pride, he’s reluctantly willing to write a silly letter.

turns out writing that silly letter was harder than any football game he’s ever played.

————————————————————————

‘dear y/n,

i remember the first time we met.

it was first day of junior high, and you were sitting on a bench in front of the school with red puffy eyes, fiddling with the little kumamon plush on your bag.

i was late to class that morning, and after seeing you i purposely tried to walk faster in order to avoid any human interaction. but you saw me and grabbed onto my blazer, refusing to let go even though i didn’t spare you a glace. you asked for help getting to your classroom, and because i didn’t know what i was getting myself into, i lead you there (like the kind person i am) expecting to never see you again.

but i guess the world had other plans, because it turned out we were in the same class. you stuck to me like a parasite, annoying me every chance you got and never shutting the fuck up. but i enjoyed the company, though younger me would never admit that.

fast forward a few years and nothings changed. or has it? you’re still yapping your mouth off all the time and clinging beside me in every class. except something’s different, and i don’t know what it is. you laze around at my house after begging me for homework help, we occasionally go get food, sometimes fall asleep together and— [this part is illegible because rin drew over it too hard]

i don’t know. i think around this time i started distancing myself from you because i always felt uneasy around you. my heart was always beating rapidly, my stomach felt uneasy, and i just felt anxious. all the time. nii-chan told me it was because of you, so i just stopped talking to you. i’m sorry.

i’m sorry i didn’t tell you i was leaving. that i’d be gone for a while because i got scouted by blue lock. i didn’t mean to because i thought i’d be okay before i left. sorry i’m rambling now. i know i don’t speak a lot in person so i’m writing my thoughts down for you to understand me better.

i was a kid in denial, and sometimes i still am because even now i don’t understand that part of myself. to be honest, i would’ve never confessed these feelings of mine if my friend didn’t push me to. it sounds like a dick move but i swear on my career that everything i’ve written on this stupid paper is genuine and sincere.

and what i am certain of is that i want you to be by my side. i want you to be there cheering for me when i win a game, i want you to be there beside me when i wake up, i want you to spend your afternoons lazing around me, i want you to tell me all about the small unnecessary details of your day,

i just want you

because you make me feel safe

————————————————————————

rin’s biting his lower lip now, feeling super embarrassed about how vulnerable he just let himself be on a piece of paper. he doesn’t read over it at all and shoves it into the envelope immediately. doesn’t even check whether he wrote your address right or not because he’ll chicken out if he looks it over at all.

he’s super anxious about this letter, to the point where he’s fucking up his plays, so imagine his surprise when he sees you sitting on his porch the day he finally gets to go home.

you jump up immediately at the sight of him and run to hug him. rin stiffens at the sudden impact but drops his bags a second later to sink into your embrace.

though as if that wasn’t enough of an answer for him, he’s still uncertain about your feelings. you hear the rapid beating of his heart and look up to give him a lovesick grin.

“i love you too, itoshi rin.”

BONUS: 2YRS LATER.

“i can’t believe you forgot to sign off a letter confessing that you’re head over heels for me.” you giggle as you walk over to your boyfriend, who was staring at his letter that you pinned to your pegboard. “what if i ended up responding to the wrong person?”

rin huffs and turns away, embarrassed that you caught him reading that. “shut up, you have no other friends anyways.”

you smile teasingly at him as you notice his ears turning red. “you never thought about the possibility that someone could’ve liked me during the 10 months you ignored me for?”

he frowns, though you can’t see him, and droops his shoulders down. you know he still feels bad about it, but it’s fun to tease him because in your eyes he looks so adorable, like a big puppy.

and as he still stares at the floor, he turns around and walks over to envelop you in his warmth, resting his head in the crook of your neck.

an endearing smile finds its way on your face as you hug rin back. he’s not a words person; this was his way of expressing his apology.

“it’s okay, you big baby, as long as you’re here with me now.”

#first time writing for rin!!!!#i think this is very badly written ngl my grammar is everywhere hahahahahahahhaha #it’s kinda cute tho lol i feel like rin is such a loser even tho he’s super fine #anyways enjoy ily #itoshi rin #itoshi rin x reader #blue lock #blue lock x reader #itoshi rin fluff #itoshi rin x y/n #blue lock drabbles #bllk scenarios #rin x reader #blue lock fluff

480 notes · View notes

sapphicshav · 1 year

Text

── 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐒𝐅𝐈𝐄𝐃 | suna rintarou.

genre . . . fluff, comfort.

it has been three days since you sent your application to the college you want to go to after high school. the anticipation was killing you as you sat on your boyfriend’s couch still waiting for a reply. you were quite the artsy student which is why you applied to school that specialised in creative arts. it has been your dream to enrol there since you were able to draw, it would make you so happy if you were to be accepted. a email notification popped up on your laptop. it was them. they finally replied. you click on the email to read it. “did you get in?”, suna questioned as he walks toward you.

dear y/n l/n,

thank you expressing interest in our college. however, we regret to inform you that your application has been denied.

you stopped reading. you didn’t even have to reply for him to know the answer. the tears rolling down your cheeks said it all. he immediately came to hug you. you cried into his chest, your words coming out in small chokes because of the lump in your throat. he rubs circles on your back to soothe you muffled cries. he knows how badly you wanted to go to this college, it hurts suna as much as it hurts you to not be accepted.

“babe, i’m so sorry you didnt get in. they don’t even know what they’re missin’ out on, you’re very talented y/n.” you appreciated his uplifting words but it wasn’t enough to soothe the pain. “but rin-” he cuts you you off. “i know how much you wanted this but it doesn’t matter which college you go to, you’re still a gifted artist in my eyes. this email is bullshit, it literally means nothing. there are so many other colleges that would be lucky as hell to have someone like you, just like how i'm lucky to have you y/n. i'm so proud of you for making it to this point, don't let shit like this bring you down okay?"

you looked up at him to see the sincerity in his eyes. "do you really mean that rin?" he cups your face so that your tear-stained cheeks rest in his palms. "of course i do babe, i love you so much i'm so proud of you y/n", he wipes you tears away and gives you a soft peck on you forehead. you smile at his gesture, "i'm so glad i've got you rin". he smiles back, "i'm glad i've got you too"

thank you for reading, rbs are appreciated ♡︎

taglist: @httpghostface @ayojordanstopscreaming @urluvvdomm @avid-idiot @keiva1000

#🖌️ — ꒰ sapphicshav ™ ꒱#haikyuu x reader #suna x you #suna imagines #suna x reader #suna rintarō #hq suna #suna rintaro fluff #hq rintarō suna #suna rintarou #suna x reader fluff #suna x y/n #suna headcanons #suna comfort #hq suna fluff #hq suna x reader #suna #suna rintaro scenarios #sunarin

283 notes · View notes

cupiidzbow · 4 months

Note

hey. hope ur doing good :). I followed u bc ur black and im black and i want to be on black tumblr. but i stayed because I think your love for your f/os is beautiful. I did not know about the selfship community at all until I found this account and now I am a fan + supporter. I myself do not selfship (mostly bc I don’t rly consume media much).

However, I have come to an ethical dilemma I wanted your opinion about, if you have a moment to help me out. I think the specificity and thought that goes into f/o polls (ones that are like, in the morning your f/o a) makes you a cup of your favorite beverage and places it on ur nightstand. b) wakes up a little early to cuddle with you before their early shift etc.) is very beautiful and loving. I don’t have any f/os, so would it be inappropriate to reblog/vote/tag with my wife in mind instead? Thanks for your insight :)!

Sincerely, an anon whos brain takes the most complex route 🤠

Hi! I hope youre doing good too !!! WUAGHH that’s very kind I really appreciate that so much thank you !!!! 🥹

I can’t exactly tell you how to vote on polls bc honestly you can think anything you’d like really when you answer !!! The stuff I rb usually has me thinking of the f/os in mind but if ur wife irl does the same as some of these prompts I don’t really see why not !!! I don’t think it’s inappropriate at all to think of your wife in these situations !!!! Honestly go crazy!! It’s all in good fun anyway !!!! :D

#mailbox! 💌

9 notes · View notes

twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat · 6 months

Note

hey ari!!! hope ur doing super well <33 i dropped by to ask u a few things…….

let me know whenever u find the time to read my gojo fic… i made a few revisions over time and i’d rlly love to hear ur thoughts o valued gojo lover ;; its become very important to me , but no pressure :33

AND. need ur most brainrotting thoughts about sashishu por favor. for. research. yeah… research 🙇‍♂️

riko !!!! i hope ur doing super super well urself, im doing just fine <33 trying to finish this fic im writing so i can (hopefully) post it today pshjdh BUT its going good so far !!

i know i alr said it but !! i am so so excited to read ur gojo fic !! if i dont have time today then i will tmrw 🙏🙏 cant wait to rb it w a huge rant i took a lil peek at it n i can already tell its gonna be so good….

AND RIKO. tysm i appreciate u like no other, ive been waiting for a chance to rant abt my Absolute Beloveds……… this might get long im sorry but sashisu make me. genuinely insane

OK SO. just generally speaking…… to me, the biggest sashisu appeal is just. how grounded they are. to me. i feel like both jjk trios are very realistic but in different ways!!

like. the 2018 trio are just !! good friends and they care for each other and they have fun together. AND most importantly; they can be open w each other !! like all three of them are a lillll closed off and obviously traumatized but they can still be sincere with one another. yuji talks openly w both megumi and nobara, megumi’s whole arc revolves around him getting comfortable with the idea of leaning on others and being saved by others, and nobara’s whole character hinges on her just being unabashedly herself.

AND I LOVE THEM i really do but sashisu r just so….. different and also similar and they feel so real to me even though theyre all insane in the head.

because contrary to the 2018 trio, theyre all sort of. Cunts pshjdhd. LIKE. high school satoru is a brat and he thinks he can make friends by being a bully and hes kind despite that but hes also sooo infuriating, and suguru acts like hes better but hes rly not. theyre both assholes. same w shoko!! shes literally out here casually underage smoking and all three of them get in trouble n then blame it on each other n its just…. theyre just so fun. they bully each other but u can TELL theres love there.

and the greatest difference between the 2018 and 2006trio is that the former can be open with each other, but the latter cant. sashisu are doomed as a trio because theyre all so closed off and traumatized and repressed and they will never be as sincere with each other as yuji/megumi/nobara are.

and to me, thats the main reason why suguru defects !! not that its their fault, but the fact that they didnt notice — or maybe the fact that they DID notice but didnt know how to broach the subject — is the one factor that makes his defection almost unavoidable to me. because his best friends, his most loved people, were never the type to be vulnerable like that. and neither was he !!

theyre just so DOOMED riko….. suguru couldnt open his heart to satoru or shoko, satoru didnt notice suguru’s silence bc he was too busy making himself strong enough to protect them, and we dont know how shoko felt but she obviously didnt do anything even if she did notice smth was off. neither of them saw how much suguru was suffering, and suguru was extremely depressed and isolated and never once gave them the chance to help him.

the three of them just werent the type to have heartfelt conversations in the same way the other trio does, and i think sashisu just… figured they didnt need to. that they had that bond together and that it would always be enough. bc all three of them have these incredible powers that make them isolated and kind of miserable, but they were able to be kids only when they were together. during that one year, they got to feel that slice of normalcy and genuine friendship.

and then they lost it !! and shoko and satoru both regret it !!! and they were never able to hate suguru, and he was never able to hate them, even at the very end !!! and the thing that always breaks me is that its just so, so evident that they all loved each other. but it wasnt enough !! and i think thats such a …. grounded and real depiction of how it can be to love someone who’s ill, or traumatized, while you yourself are ill or traumatized. and you might love each other, and it might still not be enough. but the fact that the love was there still matters.

they were three child soldiers who only found comfort in each other, and they all crumbled under the weight of the world but even at the very end they still loved each other.

and for sashisu, that love never disappeared — both shoko and satoru became more responsible after suguru left, and together theyre able to protect so many of the students and their coworkers. and theyre still traumatized and arguably even MORE repressed but the two of them still stick together, and theres a comfort in knowing theyll always have that. (im ignoring the current manga arc its not canon to me idc)

THIS IS ALREADY SO LOONNGG i just. i ADORE them. theyre so good. but !! if we’re moving past just general analysis of them then !! i love to think abt…. sashisu x reader……. maybe one day ill finish my sss x reader series psjdjdj but !!!

i just think itd be such a fun n comfortable dynamic ?? bc they all complete each other in a way…. satoru is just kinda hyper n cuddly n sweet, n suguru is calm and teasing n warm…. and shoko is so chill but also so caring and . i Need them. all of them r so gorgeous i would fall to my knees and cry if i just saw them relaxing by the couch.

i feel like a reader dynamic w them would just be the four of u living together and spending the rest of ur lives doing the same things u did in high school….. going to karaoke n getting in trouble and eating food . etc etc. maybe getting a couple cats…. and a bunch of plants that would all die if it werent for suguru pshjdjs.

in conclusion they make me feel ill <3

(also riko…. pls read the pink lighter by nosferatui, its a sashisu fix-it time travel fic and its one of my favorites ever !! i still havent finished it but its complete and it genuinely changed my life the writing is so good it hurts)

#in my defense u brought this rant on urself riko………#hhhhhh they mean sm to meeeee #i rly hope akutami can squeeze out just one more tender sashisu moment….. for me specifically……..#if u have any sashisu thoughts i would loovveee to hear them riko !!! or anyone else for that matter !!!!! they r my specialest lil guys #sashisu #ask tag ✩

7 notes · View notes

projectdivamegamix · 11 months

Text

i sincerely hope artists who i rb and put in the tags "i want to eat this" or "can i chew on your art style" really appreciate it because i know i would but also that is the highest praise i can give art

0 notes

saintobio · 3 years

Text

sincerely not.

↳ gojou satoru/reader

with an arranged marriage set in place, the sacred bond is doomed with a wife who wants to make the relationship work and a husband who’s ready to ruin it all. unbeknown to him, a tragic fate already lies within the pages of his romance book.

genre. heavy angst, unrequited love, arranged marriage, modern au, 18+

tags/warnings. ooc, and nothing else except gojou is an ass

notes. a bit cliché but what’s stopping me from writing more gojo angst? bye idek why i still write at all jndsj rbs appreciated <3

series masterlist -> episode two

Marriage is a sacred bond.

With over seven billion people around the world, you were granted to have only one person to be your chosen life-long partner. As with every failed relationships, people would tell you that you just haven’t found the better half of your soul, the significant other who shared the same heart, or as some liked to put it, your twin flame. Carefully choosing a partner was the advice that you would hear from your elders again and again like a broken record. For years, they have nagged about how miserable it was that you were walking around as a twenty five year-old woman without a lover. But what made up for the lackluster romance in your life was hope. Hope that someday, at the right time and place, you were to be married to the perfect husband who would love and cherish you as a wife for the rest of your life.

That was the beauty of true love. It was unpredictable, yet gratifying once you had your fair share of it. You seek it, your search for it until you meet the person that was destined for you. And when that happens, everything else in the world would just take a halt. In that moment, when you and him have finally found each other, you believed that it would be one of the most blissful parts of your journey to adulthood.

All happy couples have their own romantic fate written in the stars, but in a situation where a husband was appointed to you, was that considered breaking the universe’s law of finding your special one?

Was that considered cheating your way into what fate could have had in store for you?

Arguably, you thought that maybe this was a push from fate, too. Perhaps you were just truly meant to be married to the man that you had grown fond of since you were young. Because his and your fathers were practically brothers by virtue, their unyielding friendship had now led you to this day, wearing an immaculate ivory gown in an expensive garden venue, to marry the perpetually handsome Satoru Gojou.

You had not seen him since the day it was announced by your father that you were going to marry his best friend’s only son. The whole marriage preparation was rushed, with everything else coordinated by the people hired by Satoru’s father to ensure that the wedding would be as perfect as it should be albeit done in haste. You weren’t exactly opposing the idea, but you were worried that Satoru might not be in complete agreement to be forever tied to a woman he didn’t love.

On the contrary, his grandmother told you otherwise.

“Darling, he is excited to see you.” For hours and hours, she cajoled you with reassuring words while she stroked your hair, eyes gleaming with delight as you saw them from the mirror’s reflection. It seemed as though she had noticed how nervous you were for this big day. “That young man couldn’t sleep. He must be overwhelmed.”

Inaudibly to her, a sigh of relief rolled off your lips. At least, you were glad to know how he felt about today’s ceremony. You had only ever heard from your father that Satoru had consented to the wedding, but you were spared of the other details for the past few months by being convinced that everyone was busy and that the only thing you needed to worry about was picking the perfect wedding dress.

“I probably should’ve spoken to him before the wedding just to make sure that he’s fine with everything, Nana,” you mused, staring at your airbrushed face and silently admiring how glamorous the hair and make-up artist made you look today. “I just couldn’t find the right time to talk to him because I was told he’s been on business trips for the past few weeks. I tried reaching out, but his secretary keeps telling me that he’s unavailable.”

“Why, there is no need to worry about such a thing. I guarantee that my Satoru is ready as ever. He’s blessed to have a woman like you.” The crease on his grandma’s forehead lessened the more she smiled, but a cough soon erased the gentleness on her face as she rubbed her chest for some relief. With your older sister standing next to her, she caressed the old woman’s back and guided her into tucking a porcelain floral headpiece just above your braided updo. “Ah, look how stunning. I’ll bet my buttons you two will give me the most beautiful grandchildren.”

Heat suffused your cheeks at the thought of having your own family with Satoru. As part of a married couple’s life, the product of your love would be represented by the children that you would soon bear for him. This was a fairytale that you once believed only existed in fiction, but with some inexplicable force of luck, you were now granted a prince charming to live with in real life.

Still and all, your stomach was in knots when you stood at the far side of the aisle with all eyes on you later that day. Your delicate fingers fidgeted as you held on to your bouquet, anxiety filling your heart at a dangerous rate. The garden was filled with people that you knew; from your relatives, friends, to your other acquaintances. On the other side was Satoru’s own guests and perhaps some really important people in his life, even shareholders and investors, who were all waiting to see him finally tie the knot.

“You know, sweetheart. I was nervous when I married your mom, too,” your dad offered a joke to lighten your anxious state after noticing how you tightened your grip around his arm. You shouldn’t be nervous when the garden that held your sacred exchange of love was the most enchanting floral paradise that you had seen in your life. Amaranthine flora covered the trellises, pastel shades colored the seats, ornate candelabras decorated the credence table, all combined with the redolence of vanilla and jasmine that greeted your nose with a creamy, velvety smell.

Timeless elegance and utmost sophistication was how you would describe your wedding day as though you were a modern-day Cinderella without a midnight time frame into being a princess. Chic, refined, coordinated in pearls and pastel palettes—you were left wonderstruck at how pristine everything was.

As you made slow strides towards the altar, you saw your older sister, Gen, smiling on the corner, unknowingly reminding you of her words this morning. “It may be arranged and all, but I hope you’ll have the happiest marriage. You deserve it.”

And then you saw him.

Standing at the far end of the aisle was Satoru, whose ivory hair was neatly styled in a natural pomade. He donned a classic three-piece tuxedo with a tie of the same color and satin lapels in champagne silk to emphasize the elegance in his look. The man radiated regality like a monarch of ancient times. His appearance was princely enough to make your heartbeat run faster than it already had and you wondered if you elicited the same feeling from him after seeing you in your custom wedding gown.

His hands were buried deep in his pockets as his eyes locked with yours in front of a smiling audience. It was typical for a groom to feel overwhelmed upon seeing his bride. Memories of his relationship with her would flash before his eyes and, most times, the thought of finally spending his forever with her would make the groom cry.

Satoru didn’t have all of that with you.

You couldn’t tell what thoughts were bubbling inside his head as you joined him at the altar. Even though his face reflected a genial smile, his eyes couldn’t veil its emptiness. His hands felt cold when you held it. His visage remained impassive even as you two faced the priest who would be blessing your sacred marriage. It was clear as day that being in here with you was the last thing he ever wanted.

For a bride who was getting married to a man of such saintly features, you certainly didn’t expect that you would have a broken heart on the day of your wedding. In an exchange of vows and I do’s, you were awakened to the thought of how this wedding was a torture to Satoru’s soul. He was masking his blues with an insincere smile, standing centimeters apart while his heart was miles away.

Even at that, you remained poised as you listened to the officiant’s words, taking every word deep into the vastness of your heart just like any woman who valued marriage as an important part of her life. You couldn’t possibly put the marriage to a stop, not now and not ever. Not when all eyes were fixed on the both of you, having spent the time and energy just to be in attendance to this special day.

“Satoru, do you promise to love, honor, cherish, and protect Y/N, forsaking all others, and holding only unto her forevermore?”

When he took a moment to answer with a blank gaze, you could feel tiny pricks being sent straight to your heart. Just a mere glance at his stolid mien was enough for you to believe that he was going to call off the wedding and run away. What else did you expect? He clearly didn’t want this as much as Nana nor his and your fathers made it seem. It shouldn’t surprise you if he took a step back and announced that he couldn’t go on in making an oath to offer the rest of his life with you. That he would rather get out of this hell hole and be somewhere else than to proclaim a love that was being forced out of him.

But he didn’t. The soles of his leather shoes remained intact on the ground.

“I do,” he professed, despite the inner turmoil that plagued his head.

Being surprised by his conclusion to proceed with the marriage, you made the bold to decision to also continue and return your own “I do” for when the pastor asked you of the same matrimonial question.

“Bride and Groom, you have heard the words of love and marriage, have exchanged your vows and made your promises, and celebrated your union with the giving and receiving of rings. It is at this time that I now pronounce you husband and wife,” the officiant declared, “you may now kiss the bride.”

As you turned on your heels to face each other, your groom slowly lifted the veil off your face where you had a clear view of his diamond blue eyes that trailed down on your lips before he leaned in to seal this marriage with a kiss.

It was brief—with his warm lips barely brushing against yours, but affectionate enough when he held your cheek along with it. The millisecond of having your lips enveloped on each other made you frozen in your spot as you absorbed the very idea that this marriage was indeed bona fide. The rings, the vows, the kiss. They were all proof of how real this marriage was. And when he pulled away, he was gazing at you with eyes that spoke a million words left unsaid.

There was no turning back now.

From this day forward, you were officially his and he was yours.

You would give credit where it was due. As much as you presumed that your groom didn’t like this marriage, Satoru was surprisingly a gentleman throughout the reception. He did little things that made you feel like you were an actual couple prior to the wedding—be it with the way he placed a hand on your back during your first dance or how he would scoot closer so you could whisper on his ear as you sat in front of curious eyes—quite the simple gestures, but enough to make your heart flutter.

Even though you had known him for years, you never really had a remarkable amount of interaction together. You two remained as neutral acquaintances throughout your teenage years, merely greeting each other whenever necessary, but unexpected that you would end up having to marry each other as grown adults. To some extent, it might be a little expected. You were on the same age bracket, same circle of families with generational wealth, and your father knew about your longtime crush on him back when you were younger, but never did you think that the day would come where your dad would coordinate with Satoru’s father to make sure that this marriage would happen.

Satoru was a very close family friend. Other than both of your fathers being the best of friends, your mothers were also from the same circle. Photographs of them hanging out since college were enough proof of how small the world was and how everything seemed to have connected yours and his parents to each other. Ironically enough, they both shared the same fate, too. Due to a terminal illness, your mother no longer existed in this world while Satoru’s parents were divorced for reasons you chose not to stick your nose into. His mother was alive, but no longer by his side after having remarried another man and he now had a stepmother who had been taking care of him since he turned eighteen.

It was also mainly the Gojous that wanted this arranged marriage because Nana favored you by a significant advantage. She had long been fond of you way back when your father would take you to their mansion as a kid, claiming that you were the granddaughter that she never had. The thing was, Satoru’s grandmother was battling through the downsides of old age which might have left her grandson with no choice but to comply to her last dying wish of welcoming you into their family.

You were aware of how Satoru loved her with every fiber of his body because she was the only blood-related maternal figure that he had left. You could only imagine how he would chastise himself for not fulfilling her wishes before it was too late.

You were pretty much on the same page, too.

You grew up with extremely strict parents which ultimately became the reason why you had very few experiences when it came to men. At your current age, it was a true shame to see your friends settling down while you were still claiming to be an independent career woman as an excuse to your lack of romantic relationships. None of the guys you had dated ever earned your father’s approval until you no longer had anyone chasing you because they must have realized that you weren’t worth all that trouble.

You were the youngest between you and your sister who was happily married by her own choice. Unlike her, you didn’t really have anyone that pursued you the way her husband did for fifteen years. Such dedication paid off with earning your dad’s support and respect.

Your father thought that you were better off married to someone that he knew, and that became the very reason of yours and Satoru’s marriage.

At least, in your point of view, you hoped that it could work. You already had a prior attraction to him during your teenage years so it would be easy to fall back into that abyss of overflowing romantic emotions for the sake of your marriage. You were willing to be the best wife that he could ever ask for, only if he was ready to accept you.

“Congrats, you two.” A woman with long brown hair approached you and your husband during the reception. You recognized her as Shoko Ieiri, one of Satoru’s closest friends since high school. You were quick to greet her kindly in return. “I can’t believe you’re married, Gojou.”

The man stood high, peering around the ballroom to see the multitude of guests that filled the place. “I can’t believe it, either,” his response was rather monotonous, not giving anything away.

You tried to speak your mind and looped an arm around his, smiling gently as you looked at his angelic face, “I’m actually surprised that he showed up.”

Rather than acknowledging you, he seemed all blasé about your words by simply turning to his best man, the dashing Suguru Getou, who was walking behind Shoko.

“You’re getting wasted at my wedding?” Satoru joked, exchanging fist bumps with his best friend. “I’m the one who should be drinking.”

Suguru’s eyes turned into moon crescents as he shot you a friendly smile. “Hey, Y/N,” he greeted before facing your husband. “You can’t drink, you rascal. You have a long night ahead with your wife. They say honeymoon stage is the best.”

He was teasing the both of you by wiggling his eyebrows that garnered yours and Shoko’s chuckles. On one hand, Satoru was holding his breath with a face that concealed his distaste for the thought. His countenance was what forced you to withdraw your arm that was loosely hooked around his, gauging on his reaction and noticing the way his Adam’s apple rose up and down. It looked like he was almost disgusted.

Before you could say anything else, he snatched the glass of whiskey from his best friend’s hand and took a swig in heavy gulps. “I just wanna get this shit over with.”

You started the day with a half-contented heart. You were made a fool for thinking that Satoru was looking forward to being married to you because you were gullible enough to listen to yours and his family’s words. Of course, they would tell you that he was excited even if he was far from it. Why would they ruin a special day by telling you that the reason they kept Satoru away from you for the past two months was because they knew that he would tell you just how much he despised this wedding?

There was no doubt that he was only being civil in front of your families. He would hold your hand, walk side by side with you, and even smile at you—but through it all, there was a thin line between being genuine and simply acting. It was obvious in Satoru’s cerulean eyes that he was doing the latter. Because every time he noticed that no one was looking, he would brush your hand away and walk three steps forward without looking back. He would glance at you with a sharp gaze, never truly looking at you to notice the pain that painted your face in dejection.

He must have dreaded this day too much. Even as the reception ended and both of your families sent you off to a black sedan as newlyweds, Satoru was building an impenetrable wall that bordered his intentions and yours in a way to wake you up from your daydream.

Life was not a fairytale, and he was the reality that pulled you back to your feet.

“You probably couldn’t wait for this day to happen, huh?” His question reeked with disgust as the two of you sat on the backseat of the sedan. He had his arms crossed and back reclined against the backrest, staring at the view of the city like they were of better interest than his own wife.

You tried to swallow the weakness in your voice. “Satoru, I-I wouldn’t have agreed to this if I knew that you didn’t want it.”

For the first time that night, he turned to look at your face with eyes that bore heavily into yours. “What makes you think I ever wanted it?”

He didn’t hold back from saying those venomous words regardless if they sent knives to your aching heart. He looked even more bothered at the fact that his personal driver could hear just how revolted he was with you, exposing how this marriage was nothing but forced out of his will and that you were responsible for all of this. When you dreamed about weddings as a child, you didn’t picture out that you would be fighting with your husband on the first night.

But for what it was worth, he didn’t really consider you as a wife. Only by contract did this bond make you a legal partner, not through his personal feelings nor his own wishes.

“I’m sorry.” You didn’t know why you said those words in silent acquiescence. You didn’t know if you were saying it to him or to yourself for being oblivious to the reality that awaited you.

He didn’t care. He stepped out of the car without looking behind to see if you had caught up with his hasty strides. He didn’t speak another word as you got inside the express elevator to his upscale apartment building, later entering the penthouse that you now called your home. Such a home almost emitted a gasp from you the minute you entered the topmost apartment. Everything was luxurious—from the high ceilings, the lush furniture, to the infinity rooftop pool. The glass panels offered a gorgeous view of the Tokyo skyline and you stood mesmerized by the cityscape that reflected a constellation of different lights.

“Are you gonna keep standing there or what?”

You got out of trance at the sound of Satoru’s voice who stood outside of a bedroom, unbuttoning his shirt with a moue on display. “I’m just... Is this where you live?” you inquired, following him inside the room where a king-sized bed was laid in front of you.

“Yeah.” While you stood meekly on one corner, Satoru had already gotten rid of his shirt to be completely bare-chested and you didn’t expect that he was that toned under his clothes. The man may be your husband now, but you felt awkward around him at a situation where he would walk around half-naked as if you had seen all of him before. “Your stuff’s in the closet if you wanna change.”

You gave him a small nod. “Okay.”

What do married couples do on the first night? God. You were panicking on the inside as you made your way towards Satoru’s walk-in closet that housed a significant amount of expensive corporate suits and ties. The right side of the spacious wardrobe was where all of your clothes and shoes were neatly organized and were seemingly done by the housemaids back at your father’s house.

It just started to fully sink into you that you were actually married and this setup was what you considered normal now. In two years, five years, or ten years from now, sharing the same living arrangement with Satoru would no longer be considerably new to you. You would be accustomed to his daily routines in your domestic household, perhaps with kids running around the house in a year or two.

For now, the biggest challenge was your own husband. The same man who grabbed you by the wrist and pinned you against the wall, staring down at you in blatant scrutiny. The look of intent that he sent you was close enough to be a glower, one that brought you sudden fright and increased the speed of your heartbeat.

“S-Satoru,” you mumbled, pulling your wrist away. “What are you—”

He lightly cupped your jaw and you could feel the heavy rise and fall of his chest that signaled his growing ire. His gaze was sharp and unforgiving, ready to ruin your entirety even with just his rancorous words. “Let’s set things straight here,” he spoke in a domineering voice, “You and I will never work.”

It was pointless to restrain your emotions with no one else around for you to play pretend. In spite of that, you held onto the ring around your finger to try and clear your intentions, “I know you’re not happy with this... but I wanna try.”

“Try?” he scoffed, leaning in closer until you could feel his warm but minty breath against your cheek. “You’re the one who initiated this marriage, right? Since you had that stupid crush on me for fuck knows how long and no one else wanted you?”

You immediately shook your head in denial. How did he even the get that impression? “Th-That’s not true,” you stated firmly, “I’d never force anything! I was just complying to our dads’ requests just like you did.”

His eyebrows furrowed at your claim. “Bullshit. Why did he say he’ll pull out all of his investments if I didn’t agree to marry you?”

Your eyes widened at the newfound information because never did it cross your mind that your dad would even do such a thing. Moreover, it wasn’t in his character to give an ultimatum of that scale for the sake of marrying off his youngest daughter. Was he bluffing? With those facts alone, you refused to believe your husband’s words. “My dad wouldn’t do that. He would never say that.”

“Whatever, then.” Satoru’s frown lessened, but the hand that cupped your jaw remained still. “If you really wanna try, then stay the fuck away from me when no one’s around. Get it?”

You couldn’t understand this. No, you were failing to grasp why you were being subjected to such hostility when you had no ill intentions when you agreed to this marriage. Had you known that Satoru would treat you unfairly for it, you never would have agreed. You would have continued your life as a lonely woman in her mid-twenty’s without a husband who was ready to give you hell.

The antagonism in his stance induced a faint tear on your eye as you searched for the minuscule kindness in his. “Why do you hate me so much?” you asked, chest heaving from the oncoming surge of tears. “You weren’t like this before.”

While he released his hold on you, he spat out words that stung your heart with fatal poison. “You married me,” it was his simple answer, “that’s why.”

He was already walking away before you could respond. He was already stepping on your heart, thrashing it, pulverizing every artery before you could even think of living in bliss at the false pretense that he could learn to love you just as how willing you were to love him.

“You can sleep on the couch,” he offered, apathetic to the pain that swallowed you inside, “I’m not sharing a bed with you.”

#gojou satoru x reader #gojou satoru x you #gojou satoru angst #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru angst #gojo x reader #gojo x you #gojo angst #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk angst

4K notes · View notes

tsukishumai · 3 years

Text

pairing; semi eita x reader

genre; angst

wc; 1.1k

a/n; inspired by this anon :’) this didn’t turn out how I wanted but I hope you like it anyway !

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

The final chord blasted through the speakers of the stadium as Semi hung his head back, his sweat dripped down his forehead and his heavy breathing was drowned out by the roaring cheers from the stands. The crowd began to chant his name, and even though he couldn’t see past the stage lights, he smiled and he waved, blowing kisses out to whoever could catch them.

Semi could never accurately describe this feeling, even if he wanted to. Thousands of people from all different walks of life, coming together here for one singular reason — for him. To see him play the music he had poured his soul into, laced with his entire being. To sing back to him the words he had spent hours writing on a crumpled up notebook in a dimly lit hotel room.

The admiration. The validation. It was a better high than he could have ever imagined — a warm, prickling sensation that creeped out from his heart until it engulfed him in goosebumps.

He offered the audience a final bow, ending his show with a heartfelt speech of gratitude, and a promise to see them again soon.

Semi’s boots thudded on the vinyl floor as he ran off to stage right, paying no attention to the techs that rushed to dismantle the equipment. His band all exchanged congratulations for yet another show well done, laughing all the way back to the green room with Semi trailing silently behind them.

He could hear the crowd still buzzing after their electrifying performance, each person taking a piece of Semi’s spirit with them.

This was the final show of his third studio tour — the end of a months-long journey around the country, a new city nearly every night, a different sea of faces staring back at him.

This had been what he worked so hard for, through sweat and tears and hopeless nights and skipped meals. The days of praying to some unknown being with his hands clamped together and eye squeezed shut were long behind him, and the evidence of his plight had finally been vindicated by his billboards in Shibuya.

Yet as his makeup is wiped off and he sheds his stage clothing, Semi feels himself drained of any energy or enthusiasm that might have been left in his system.

The end of his tour was met with a mixture of relief and sadness, a bittersweet atmosphere collectively surrounding his entire crew. The label had treated them to a party in celebration, one that Semi spent in the corner scrolling through his phone. At the end of the party, Semi thanked everyone for their hard work, and sincerely wished for the opportunity to be able to work with them all again.

His flight back to his city had been a blur, the taxi ride back to his apartment even more so. He dragged his luggage disgracefully across the threshold, haphazardly taking off his shoes and tossing them in a dark corner.

Semi carelessly throws his keys on the kitchen counter, making his way to the fridge and grabbing the fresh cold beer that he had his assistant stock before he arrived back home.

He brings two bottles to save himself a trip, chugging nearly half of the first one before he even makes it to his couch. He sets the extra bottle down onto the coffee table, slipping his phone out of his pocket before plopping himself down on his couch.

He’s suddenly faced with a wave of messages — from unsaved numbers and tweets from fans. Mostly messages of congratulations, but he couldn’t be sure. His fingers moved past the red bubbles that contained triple digit notifications, clicking on Instagram instead.

Semi takes another long sip from his beer as he presses the tiny magnifying glass icon, taps on the search bar, and selects the very first user on his most recent searches.

There was a new post on your page, one that Semi hadn’t seen when he checked just before his flight. Suddenly, he feels a shortness to his breath, and his eyes stay frozen to the screen.

You were sitting on a blanket laid out in a meadow, surrounded by long, vibrantly green grass. You were dressed in yellow, and the smile on your face had radiated warmth and happiness.

Two young children that looked exactly like you sat on your lap, looking up at you as if you were their sun.

Semi imagines it were him behind the camera. That he was the one attempting to get your children to look his way, but they were just too enamored with the way you held them. He imagines the sound of your laughter as you rush him to take the picture, claiming you could no longer keep the babies still.

He deliberates if this would have been his life if he hadn’t left you in Miyagi. If he had just stayed when you had asked him not to go, instead of taking the first offer any label bothered to throw at him.

His house might have been smaller. His job might have been mediocre.

But would he have been sitting alone in the dark, nursing an empty bottle of beer as he stared at a family that didn’t belong to him?

He exchanges the empty bottle with his second beer.

He scrolls further down your page and states at the pictures he’d seen a hundred times before. He tries not to frown in disgust at how happy you looked with your husband.

He looks up from the screen, up at the plaques he has framed in the walls, and the awards lined up on his mantle — all proudly displaying SEMI EITA in beautiful, bold letters.

They stare back at him as if to mock him, and he wonders if this was really what he traded in his life with you for.

He takes another long, long swig.

Have you ever watched any of his shows? Do you know the Grammy he won was for a song he wrote about you? Was he just a passing thought to you now, a faded memory of someone that might have once been important in another era of your life?

His questions will never be answered, he knows.

So he scrolls until he reaches the end of your 234 posts, down to a picture he’s sure you had just forgotten to delete.

One of you beside him and his guitar, smiling down at each other with his lips frozen mid-melody.

The Semi Eita on his walls are only there because of the Semi Eita in this photograph, the one that was able to sit beside you as his one-person audience, clapping for him and cheering even though his guitar had been out of tune.

He closes his eyes as he finishes the last of his beer.

He wished that he told you that you were enough.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

rbs v appreciated <3

#hqcorenet #hanimehub #semi x reader #semi eita x reader #semi x you #semi eita x you #semi eita imagines #semi drabbles #semi eita drabble #semi angst #semi eita scenarios #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! scenarios

216 notes · View notes

djarrex · 3 years

Text

Hi everyone, just wanted to address what happened last night along with some other things from before that all tie in together.

There’s multiple parts to the following post - please make sure you read all of it if you’re gonna take the time to even start.

It was midnight and y'all were still jumping in on anon and telling me how I'm awful for not commenting, owning up, or taking responsibility - I should have been in bed. I have a life and job outside this app; and with the several of you in my inbox and it being too late at night to address each, I’m gonna do it now. I can’t not say something about all of this. I just can’t keep quiet and ignore the problem - it’s not fair to you all. Deleting one post already has you guys even more riled up and all I wanted to do was offer something better than a “half-hearted apology” (it was very late at night when I wrote that very short apology, and wanted a redo tbh).

I really didn't want to make a long post like this. I reached out to a select few on here because I care about them (there's more of you, but like I said, it was at the time after midnight and I was fucking exhausted). but I was being demanded for accountability. So here I am.

Allow me to be real with you all, if that's ok. If it's not, well, idk. First I wanna address all you anons, who, instead of speaking to me one on one about all this, want to criticize me and shame me and my writing when truthfully it feels like you haven't even read more than a handful of my work. I didn’t realize that I write the clones all the same way? That I always make them super aggressive and uncaring and dom? “you write every single clone as so dominant instead as unique individual men with their own personalities” Interesting. See, that right there tells me you haven't read nearly enough of my stuff for me to believe that's true. That's one accusation I absolutely will not back you on because I know it’s inaccurate - saying how I group the clones into some overly-aggressive, and uncaring category - that I always write all of them as mean in bed because they're men of color. And hey, if I do write rough smut - which yeah, it's out there and I write it, as do a lot of you - there are warnings at the beginning, aftercare, dialogue, reader sharing their feelings, and most importantly... consent between the two. That’s what warnings are for, so that you know what you’re going to be reading. That’s why I, as we all do, appreciate warnings listed at the tops of fics; honestly, write them sub or dom or switch or however you want but don’t come at me like that. I’m sorry if I'm coming across as rude because I'm usually not, I’m one of the nicest people you’ll meet, but I will not stand idly by while you chastise my writing (writing that is pretty much the same type of stuff a lot of you write & rb with the same characters) that you haven’t read enough of to back such claims.

Next: Sincerely, from the bottom of my heart,

I get it. Really, I do. I fully understand the problem of whitewashing in SW along with almost everywhere else, and I do not agree with it. It's a huge problem, and it needs to be rectified. Now just because I don't speak publicly about it and opt out of publicly shaming TBB, doesn't mean that I agree with what’s going on. Not everyone is comfortable with sharing their opinions on a subject, no matter what that subject is or which side they're on. You live and you learn when it comes to that.

It has never been my intention to fetishize POC in my writing, which btw, the same people who are saying that it is my intention are the ones claiming I portray all of the clones as the same, aggressive men, lacking their individuality. It’s a claim that is simply not true, and I know I have followers on here to back me up on that. I know what I've written; how about you check it out and tell me that you don't see the words "soft" or "fluff" or "cuddling" or “gentle” or “tender” within my work linked in my ML. Clone character being a good partner and father? Tender love making? Holding each others faces in their hands? “We/you survived” sex? Taking care of their partner? Saying “I love you” to one another? Confirming the safe word and going slow at first? Oh my - riveting and harsh stuff - totally unacceptable.

Now: My admittedly problematic writings of Rex + Zygerria,

I went into writing that rp fic totally unaware and unknowing of the true implications. For that, I sincerely apologize. When I posted the NSFW alphabet, that’s when I was called out on that rp fic - not when I first posted it. Which the timeline doesn’t matter, I know that, but it concerns me a little bit that no one spoke up about it sooner - letting me dig myself deeper into a hole that I didn’t realize I was inside of in the first place. I've apologized once, and I know that doesn't negate what happened; I acknowledged my mistake back then, but I suppose that wasn’t good enough. I had asked you, anon, to message me to give me guidance, to teach me on what to do about the fic - you stayed hidden. Well, respectfully, what the fuck? I know we're all adults but don't lecture me and avoid me when I’d literally reached out for guidance on how to properly rectify the issue. I fixed my wording in some of my fics (the things I’ve caught upon rereading them) because I recognized and more importantly learned about and from my mistakes along with the unintentional negative implications of how I wrote those characters. Some of y'all wanna tell me that I "haven't learned"? Who are you, my personal blog police? My professor? My life coach? Are you even my friend? If I'm wrong and haven't learned, then fucking educate me. I worked hard on that rp fic, just like I do with a majority of what I write, but it doesn’t matter because I will delete it knowing that it’s harmful to others and I apologize for inadvertently romanticizing slavery with what I wrote - it was unintentional, and I’m truly sorry to those who have been hurt by it. I know it’s wrong, and there’s no proper excuse for it. Can’t go back in time, but consider it gone now.

Since that first wakeup call, I’ve been working hard to ensure I avoid using certain words and ideas when describing the clones in my fics. If there’s still something you see that isn’t correct or is inappropriate, please tell me! Don’t hold it in but then jump on the “attack M” bandwagon. Private message me, or come peacefully off or on anon, there will be no hard feelings. I don’t mind being corrected when I make a mistake - that’s just part of life, we all make mistakes and we live and learn from them. Making mistakes doesn’t = scumbag human. When you hold your breath and choose not to take the time to guide me, and if I appear to still be making the same mistakes, well, idk. I’m telling you right now that I do not mind if you message me with the good intention of pushing me in the right direction. When you come at me with hostility on anon, well, no thank you. To the anons that came without rage: thank you! I read what you wrote, and I have a better understanding as to how my writing had hurt the lovely followers of mine, and tried to address as much as possible in this post. See, angry mob anons? It costs zero credits to be kind and offer up your thoughts and advice with a good heart. I’m not going to hate you or block you if you try to correct me. I don’t block unless you’re a snoopin’ minor. Just don’t hold a knife to my throat.

Now: Why did I delete the tags and then my response to that anon ask?

Simply put: I felt awful. Deleting it doesn’t immediately mean I’m hiding from it and ignoring the issue. I wanted to come up with a better apology, explanation, whatever you wanna call it, because my followers deserve that. The ones who enjoy my work, the ones who interact, the ones who I call my friends, the ones who know that I’m a good person. Didn’t want to leave the tags/post floating around all night, giving more people time to sharpen their pitchforks and join the mob while I attempted to sleep. Trust me, I know saying that I had no ill intentions when tagging that post doesn’t make it better nor does it make it go away. I’m just trying to show you my point of view, that I knew immediately how I should not have tagged it that way, so that’s why I deleted them. I corrected my mistake. But y’all are too fucking quick I swear.

One more thing:

I know some of you who had called me out with the passive-aggressive inbox messages are still following me, and for what? You don’t like what I post, which is why one would follow another in the first place, so why bother sticking around? Do you feel like you need to police my blog? You want to be there the literal minute I make a mistake? I’m gonna turn off anon for a bit, so if you wanna discuss, message me. Just know that if you’re going to come at me with knives out, I probably won’t reply to you.

To conclude:

I’m sorry. Truly sorry for the entire Rex + Zygerria outfit + slaver ordeal with both the fic from a while ago and then the tags from last night. We can’t go back in time; the only option is to correct past mistakes that are able to be corrected, and then move on with new knowledge that’ll aid in me working even harder to ensure my writing isn’t inappropriate or offensive, and doesn’t hurt my followers nor the characters I write for. I’m still going to write self-indulgent filth and fluff, post-order 66 Rex, and other misc shit. I enjoy writing fanfic, as I know a lot of you enjoy reading what I write and love to talk to me about it. I hope that this didn’t come off as me being a bitch, because I’m really not. I enjoy interacting with the handful of people on here that I’d call my friends, and I love reading your reactions and tags to my fics when you’re excited and/or horny (LOL). It’s just after lunch time where I’m at, so I hope you have a great rest of the day/night/morning whatever for wherever you are.

#long post #m personal

25 notes · View notes

donquxiotes · 2 years

Text

important announcements abt my askbox + 700 followers event. not proofread, so excuse any mistakes. use context clues.

firstly, i would like to thank everyone who sent their lewdings in my askbox. i appreciated it more than u know. i, however have a couple of problems regarding my askbox like holding asks for too long, not being inspired enough to write, forgetting my asks & etc. so asks tend to stay in my askbox for months. i keep telling myself not to feel bad bc it happens & i can’t force myself to write even tho i want. but i still do. so sincerely, i’m incredibly sorry for the asks that i didn’t do/get to. ik some of u work up a helluva courage to send to me, just for me not to do it. i feel like shit bc of it. to put it simply, i deleted all the asks in my askbox.

+ abt my askbox, i don’t like being perceived as mean, shocker right? so i force myself to put energy into my asks bc i don’t want my anons to think i’m being rude or disrespectful w how i normally am but it’s tiring. so tiring that i just close out of my askbox for the day. there are times where i just don’t feel social. so for now on, i will answer asks how i want & u don’t have to send any if u find me being rude. i will remember to use tone indicators where i see fit.

secondly, regarding my 700 followers event, idek. atm i’m not inspired to do it & is 80% close to deleting the entire event despite me loving every little bit of it. i took three days coming up w that event and spent even longer coming up w names for the habitats 😒 i’m not sure what happened to the inspo i had for the event. around that time, i just went into a big funk where i couldn’t write despite having everything that i need to write. it’s disheartening. i can’t keep making myself feel bad because once again, it’s out of my control. instead, i’m coming out w a hybrid collab for dom content writers. not gonna talk much abt that yet. but i want everyone to be prepared & i want everyone to actually do it. and not leave me nor any of u, hanging. (like i did) so i want to do it where it’s a comfy time for writers to add a drabble or two to their list of to-do’s. so it’s like, either my 700 followers event or the hybrid collab. i’m not doing both, not around the same time atleast yk? so, the 700 followers event will most likely be deleted.

lastly, i’m almost to 1k. surprisingly. and tbh, i don’t feel as proud of myself as i should. nowadays it just feels like people follow me and never support me after that. i’m not gonna keep complaining abt it & beg y’all to give me feedback bc it’s a simple thing that every writer deserves. but half of the time, i force myself to write just to provide y’all w content & it just don’t feel good anymore w the lack of practically anything. most of my support comes from my own friends + people in the tags (which bring in some new moots + followers) the ratio is truly sickening. i don’t think i will do an event for until i’m really confident in my followers. i write for myself, not for followers but the follower’s feed-back does make me feel proud, is all i’m saying. having followers is like “wow people really support what i like, yay” but it’s like if you’re not actually supporting me, why are u even here? yk. it’s just frustrating. idk if i’m saying i’m not gonna write anymore but, i am sick of providing y’all w FREE SHIT when the appreciation isn’t provided back. so yea. i’m sick of that.

tho, i am so happy for the few of u who send me asks, indulge in my random lewds & those who actually rb + like my content all the time, i see u! alwaysss. y’all are the ones that really makes me want to keep writing. but, having a big following does not feel good anymore. <33

some xtras things incase u aren’t aware:

my rules & regulations are always being updated every other day. i usually update the types of characters i write + kinks/fetishes i write.

my dni/byf is in my bio. the highlighted word is the link to it. i’m gonna change the theme of my blog soon so hopefully it’s where y’all will b able to access it easier & quicker. i feel like some of y’all don’t even try to click around.

my taglist form is right here! and it will always b in my pinned post. i will check it before i post a drabble or headcanons. ofc, u don’t have to join it if u don’t wanna!

ok i think that’s the end of this announcement. i just needed to get a few things off of my chest.

#. ⊹ . .kale’s important announcements.#long text.

10 notes · View notes

unholyplumpprincess · 2 years

Note

Peach! I didn't know your OC masterlist was done! Ahhhh, I'm so hype! If it isn't too much trouble, please could I have Lucius and their S/O on a lazy, domestic morning with a thunderstorm outside and neither of them have to go anywhere? Maybe their S/O brings up the idea that they'd like a tattoo from him because of how much it would mean to them? I'm sorry if this isn't enough to go off of, I'm not too great coming up with prompts XD

I've kept this in my inbox bc I shit you not it has brought me so much joy seeing one of my oc's being requested that I wanted to savor it so much. I so appreciate this :DD for my ocs I won't be as picky for prompts cause I'm just ELATED anyone would ask!!!

!!!Though this post is SFW, this blog is not, minors and ageless blogs do not follow but plz feel free to rb this post!!!

If you wanna request my oc's, here's my masterlist to give them a peek!: Link here

If you wanna request smth from me, check out my rules: HERE

Warnings: Sfw, reader is gn, summary of Lucius is that they're a big tall alien that goes by they/he/it and is ultra mega pretty and a model + tattoo artist

_____

Rain was always a favorite to Lucius. It didn't rain where they came from, no clouds to accumulate and fill with water. Of course, the first time it had rained they were quite confused, but after much research were satisfied with their new knowledge on why the sky cried and screamed as such.

You're in their loft. Their couch is huge, comfortably fitting you both. Their arms are around you, being the big spoon with their face half buried in your hair so they can peer over you and watch the rain fall. Their living room is spanned by windows above their shop, allowing you to see the city blanketed in water.

"Ya know, I've been thinking of a tattoo." You muse aloud, feeling the deep rumble of a curious hum behind you. Lucius squeezes you a bit tighter, letting you know that he's heard you. His other hum is questioning, curious, prompting you to continue. "I think your art style is what I'm looking for. And it'd mean a lot to me to have your art on me! Kinda like marking someone with your brand, ya know?"

A third hum. Their face nuzzles into your hair, a soft inhalation of them familiarizing with your scent before speaking. "You tease me, little one."

A smile blossoms on your face, wiggling your body in their arms until you can roll around to face them. Their hair is pulled up in a ponytail, some mixed black and white strands curling around their face that you move and tuck behind their ears. You don't miss the flush to their cheeks. "Oh come on. Hard not to. But I am serious, Lu! Come oooon, don't tell me you haven't thought of it."

"I have thought of it," They reply sincerely, moving so they can grab your hand, kissing your palm gingerly as their honey eyes flicker up to monitor your face. "You honor me in enjoying my work. I would be happy to oblige. What were you thinking of?"

"Would you make fun of me if I said something like the moon and stars?" You beam brightly when he flushes at the implication, turning his head and tucking it into your neck. You can't help but giggle, pressing teasingly in your tone. "Maybe over my heart??"

"You are ridiculous." You hear muffled against your neck, their voice embarrassed and only spurring you on. "And far too flattering."

"Soooo is that a yes?"

"For you, my dear? Anything your heart desires."

#Lucius Nightstar #my ocs #ocs #Lucius Nightstar x reader #headcanons #princess talks

6 notes · View notes

archangelnozhevoy · 3 years

Text

I apologize for my past post saying I know that Seraphim is plural but I was going to continue to use Seraphim as singular, it was a bad post — I take full responsibility for it & it was more a self-tease but I didn't give enough context, I had genuinely thought Seraphim was singular until then & did not realize it wasn't before then. I should have explained this &/or never posted it. I'm a questioning Jewish convert & my fiancé who is Jewish had liked that post & had not told me it was wrong to post, so I was under the assumption it was fine to keep up. This is my fault for being ignorant on the matter & I really do apologize. I should have thought it through before pushing the post button. I understand if the Jewish community does not accept this apology or if it’s sub-par, I want to make up for this in anyway possible.

I'm going to do my best to make up for this severe mistake. & I hope this is worded correctly & in way that comes off as sincere. If I ever post anything of harmful nature please message me about it, I want to fix any mistakes I may make & I understand as well as I can how harmful something like this can be to a community as a whole as a Black disabled man.

RBs & such are appreciated just because I want anyone & everyone I have harmed to see this post if at all possible. I would have touched upon this sooner but I've been semi-inactive & did not see it. If this apology does not cut it I can & will in that case make a new one.

#angelcore #angelkin #demonkin #divinekin #divinecore #fallen angelkin #kin #otherkin

14 notes · View notes

fallout-lou-begas · 3 years

Note

It's obvious from the typos in that mcnuggies meme that you stole it (the og meme spells it as craivng, the joshua one is craiving, yours is also craiving). Everyone knows you just stole it because op blocked you and you couldn't rb it and nobody's buying your 'apology'. I'd delete it to save face if I were you.

1) we both misspelled it as “craiving” because that’s almost how the source image misspells it but i think it’s also just pretty easy to miss, like i did, that the source image is actually “craivng” with no “i” in “-ing.” your eyes are so focused on the first typo that you don’t notice the second.

2) we both chose scripture as the punchline because that’s the thing that joshua literally gives you

3) here’s the context i mentioned in which i invented it on the spot last week so as to “torment a friend over Discord” while we were shitposting about joshua’s ass

4) if i was just gonna impulsively shitpost in a friend’s discord why would i remake someone else’s version of this joke (and not even that good!) instead of just using that version of the joke, unless i literally wasn’t aware of it

5) i sincerely think that this exact joke is just the logical triangulation of “joshua graham” “ass” and “cursed,” and i’m sorry that we sort of Dennis the Menaced ourselves here

6) i have literally no relationship to the other person at all, so if you think i remade this dumb meme because i was “mad I couldn’t reblog it” from them then you’re severely overestimating how much i care about either the other person or memes

7) usually i would never respond to bad faith anons like this because you clearly already just don’t like me, and that’s fine, but because of that i doubt you’d believe anything i’d say anyway in this regard, but i really take issues of plagiarism and joke theft kind of seriously so i wanted to really lay out that this was sheer coincidence

8) still, i’ve acquiesced and deleted my version of the meme from my own blog because since the other person really did post it first, i suppose it’s fair that i cordially yield the joke dibs, but because tumblr is tumblr it’s not like it’ll automatically unreblog it from everyone else, so this is more of a symbolic gesture than anything else, but i still hope you appreciate it. now the only legacy of the fat ass joshua grimace is this colossally stupid conversation we’re having now.

9) if nobody’s really “buying” my apology, then, well, i guess that’s just egg on my face and i’ll live with it

#asks #anon #the great fat ass joshua grimace controversy of december 2020

24 notes · View notes

weuschoiceheart · 3 years

Text

Hiatus

Hey everyone, It’s Junjun here. I’m....not doing well.

I know I haven’t been going back to writing (except for the keiys to your heart series) and I sincerely apologize for not putting out any works. I said this before, but once again, my mental state is crashing. My sleep schedule is messed up, and with tests and projects coming up this month, I’ll probably be exhausted and sleep-deprived most of the time. Right now I’m just dead tired after coming out from class. And I’m beating myself up from not being productive over break and getting my shit together sooner, and just regretting my life choices again.

But this time, instead of focusing on the fall, I’ve decided to find ways to improve myself and get better. Getting my life together is going to take some time, and I realized that I should be prioritizing my health, not mindlessly scrolling through Tumblr while procrastinating at 1 am in the morning. So I’m going to take some time off this hellsite.

I don’t know how long this hiatus will last. I know that it’s impossible for me to completely stop going on Tumblr altogether, so I’m probably gonna pop in every now and then to just check up and rb some stuff. If you guys see me on for more than an hour, feel free to go to my inbox and yell at me. Actually, I would greatly appreciate it if you do that because i know my future self is gonna start panicking from all the work I procrastinated on.

And that’s it for this message. I hope to show you guys a better, improved version of me when I come back.

#announcement #hiatus #junjun stuffs

12 notes · View notes

thethirdwheel404 · 4 years

Text

Med Rewatch Series (#5)

S3 e3: Trust Your Gut. From what I remember this is a big one. I just remember this episode title honestly but we’ll see what happens.

-look at that! ava’s just casually in this scene, minding her own business, doing her job! you would never guess that this is a character who would later have a psychotic break and commit suicide.

-that’s really the point i’m trying to make. I hate all those posts where they’re like ‘i hated ava before, but season 4 has finally shown her true colors’ like not even?? no??? we’re trying to prove that that was never even a thing. i want to eliminate the possibility of s4 happening from your minds. nothing from s3 should ever be used as foreshadowing. that’s what the rewrite is about, ava being a good character. ava was never going to commit suicide. she was never gonna go psychotic. that should be ingrained in everyone’s minds.

-anyways, back to the episode.

-connor takes everything like a personal attack. relax

- i never realized how fun stoll was. like obviously not in the story but as a character he’s hilarious. unattached by everyone else’s drama

-awww. this maggie interaction is amazing. tapping sarah on the shoulder (neck actually but whatever) just to say hi. adorable. and sarah is already super jumpy. come on. her anxiety is already setting in. they really gave sarah two huge storylines in the same season.

-maggie... no one else would ever slash sarah’s tires. i mean honestly

-WHY DOES CONNOR HAVE TO CONTROL OF EVERYTHING - honestly ava was just reading off the chart and he can’t even let her do that he has to take over just to say the same things.

-and the way ava just takes it with her smug smile

-she is such a strong character there is no reason she would have gone crazy over connor she literally needs nothing from him.he has not ever had anything that she needed.

- SHE’S JUST ROLLING HER EYES, SMIRKING, AND SHAKING HER HEAD AT THIS INSECURE MAN ava I love you.

-okay there’s no way i can explain it but after rolling her eyes at connor Ava turns and looks at the patient and instantly her face changes and you can see such pure concern in her eyes?? s4 ava could never (can someone please rb with a picture of what i’m talking about? it’s uncanny and so so sincere.)

- she’s in control of her emotions. she cares so much for her patients so don’t even try to play that card. the only thing connor has done literally since she got here is get in her way.

-AND CONNOR LOOKS AT HER WITH SUCH DISTRUST AND CONTEMPT. TELL ME HOW. this is insane. exasperating.

-and the way she smiles and comforts the patient. i mean come on. she’s just so amazing. AND COMFORTING. if ava really was as heartless as people say, she wouldn’t take the effort to do that. connor didn’t even do that, he just scowls at ava.

-which just proves my point, ava is only ever mean to people who she thinks deserve it. and, the more that I think about it, she’s never really actually mean. sure, she’s blunt and rude, but never cutting. she’s nice to her patients (and I know what you’re going to say, it’s not because she has to be. she’s a doctor, she still wants to help people). but when her patients are dicks, she’s not nice to them. she’s as snarky with as she’s professionally allowed to be.

-like, take this guy. he seems nice enough. he’s funny, polite, comes across charming, so ava is nice and is polite back to him.

-let’s move on.

-why is connor always so suspicious of ava. come on. he’s the one who should be sus. she literally said ‘Don’t worry, Ray, we’ll take good care of you’ and he’s giving her this weird side eye.

-ethan and will being in this board meeting is really adorable to me. like, just, bros.

-oh godddd sarah please relax. sweetie. please.

-sarah fucking tranqed him oh my god

-oh my god noah asking people for help literally shut the fuck up

-straight people are gross. not to hate but how does anyone sit through manstead

-connor literally needs to chill. I know this bit (they’re arguing over menial things in surgery) plays more to them just picking on each other, pulling each other’s pigtails on the playground if you will (i didn’t like that analogy but I used it anyway), but if you look at it, ava was only trying to help connor (suggesting a wider possible target and an easier to handle stitch) and connor took it wayyy to personally. sure the second bit of advise is just poking at him, but she suggested a better spot on the base and he shut her down without any thought.

-and then latham points out that there is no point in arguing, to which ava defers, then connor snidely says ‘Thank you, Doctor, Now, how about from here on out we keep the background noise to a minimum’ and ava just shakes her head, scoffing.

-at this point ava just likes annoying connor because its fun. it’s entertaining. he gets so upset. everyone’s done that, just be annoying for fun (its bad to say but i mean come on everyones done it)

-another point, ava immediately deferring to latham might read to some as her being a suck up but that’s not what it is.

-ava really likes seeing how close to the line she can get. she goes right up to it, but she never crosses it. the same is true with her interactions with other people outside of surgery.

-I really like this story of the girl who passed out and hit her head, and her brother’s a wreck, and her parents obviously think the brother’s a disappointment. and it was finals week so of course she wasn’t taking care of herself. and the brother knew that, and you can tell he cares so much and feels so bad. it’s nice

-complication on the surgery they were working on. ava comes in with a solution (off of connor’s mistake during surgery after not following her advice) but I have a sneaking suspicion that by the end connor will be back on top

-the effort it took connor to say ‘it’s a good idea’ come on man just fucking let it go

-i’m glad we’ve all agreed that connor’s just a dick

-aw look at that she even held the door for him. connor would never

-i don’t want to overly push the ‘med is sexist’ thing but how is it that in a storyline between nat and ethan, characters who have never been romantically involved, they still pull the woman thinks one thing, man refuses to believe it and is right dynamic. i mean come on med seriously. what the fuck is wrong with you.

-the look of annoyance and disbelief on ava’s face that connor hadn’t actually messed up. comedic, but also i get your pain.

-glad that latham sides with ava, ava advocating for a riskier procedure so they could ensure the blockage is removed)

-(something could be said about ava’s high-risk, high-reward ideals. you could even draw the parallel to events in s4 and s5, even though I really don’t want to. it’s an interesting and notable character trait to say the least)

-YOOOO I FORGOT HOW METAL THE PSYCH STORY GETS

-dude straight up cuts his abdomen open and his intestines spill out

-the fear and shock and emotion on sarah’s face make me feel so bad for her

-WAIT IS THIS THE EPISODE WHERE SHE LOSES THE END OF THE INSTRUMENT? IS THAT WHAT THIS IS? i am not prepared to watch an ava bekker breakdown rn.

-the shock on ava’s face when connor said nice job.

-ava actually tried to apologize to connor. well, not apologize but she feels a little bit bad for just how abrasive she’s been to connor. (connor didn’t necessarily have to make it super competitive). Ava said “Look, I know i have the tendency to step on toes. it’s nothing personal”

-and now they’re not arguing and are this close to actually working like a team

-and i cannot believe connor’s big one-liner is ‘Murphy’s law’

-the emotion on april’s face when the girl’s parents won’t even let her brother grieve for her. I feel it. astounding. its so painful omg

-ava: “your optimism is enchanting.” when i was writing earlier I was worried I wasn’t being accurate with her dialogue and making it sound too overly formal but i guess I nailed it. also, this line reinforces how much I love her (so does every other line)

-connor just refusing to give ava anything, no credit, no nothing. doesn’t even give her credit for earning the surgery saying “you may have elbowed your way onto the case, but he is still my patient” (I JUST TRANSITIONED INTO A QUOTE SO SMOOTHLY WHY CANT I DO THAT IN MY LANG RHETORICAL ANALYSIS ESSAYS YOU’RE KIDDING)

-hey it’s joey!

- i can appreciate him so much more when he’s not chasing after reese

-do you remember their first meeting? bickering over who gets the last splenda? (real meet cute amirite)

-dr. charles remarking how all the scientific advances can’t beat human instinct, nice little tie in to the episode title

-ava just smiling while connor waits for her to apologize. she. takes. no. shit.

-i literally hate connor’s face so much. it fucking looks predatory like stop looking at her like that. it’s almost like you were planning her psychotic break

-ava’s cunning, saying ‘we’ instead of ‘i’ when talking about the decisions being made. she’s smart. she knows what to do. She knows how to present herself. (and yeah, a little hypocritical that she said to connor ‘when you fail, I will make sure that it is noted that it was your fault and not mine,’ but like I said, she just knows how to present herself)

-latham: “Dr. Bekker seems to enjoy this discordance.”

-rhodes’ face when changing his mind and saying ‘maybe I do’ when asked if he enjoyed it too - he literally makes the dumbest faces. please. stop. (is it a straight people thing?)

Alright. Another episode down. 17 to go. This was actually a pretty good episode all around. Ava took none of connor’s shit and you’d have to squint to find any sort of romantic subtext in their interactions, which is huge win in my book. reese’s storyline wasn’t too bad, she didn’t go through too much trauma, which, the bar for watching med is incredibly low i guess. This was a really good episode for ava. like I said before, very little romantic subtext, and she had a redeeming quality in the way she obviously cared for her patient at the beginning of the episode.

The main point is something I’ve been reiterating again and again. Ava cares about her patients. Ava is mean to connor because she knows someone needs to put him in his place, and she is glad that it is her.

All in all, this was a pretty good Ava episode. Very happy.

thanks for sticking with it.

read the rest here:

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10 / Part 11 / Part 12 / Extra

#chicago med #med rewatch series #mine #trust your gut

6 notes · View notes