#Barbie wears pink for instance
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I imagine Essek had one or two record scratch moments in his youth
Such as, alternately,
#I'm on my meme bullshit again#it's shitpost o'clock#note as with my previous Barbie Essek content this is not to say Essek is Barbie unilaterally as there are significant divergences#Barbie wears pink for instance#(jk Essek has a pink umbrella)#but anyway do not flatten the analysis#this is about Essek feeling like the odd man out in his society due to not following the religion#op#essek thelyss#critical role
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Our Allens <3
How would our boys react to the Barbie Movie?
Warnings: none
♡ Yassine ♡
I imagine that out of the two of you he’d be the first to see the trailer when it comes out.
Like minutes into its release, already in his Youtube recommended
He was well beyond the age of acting like he was too cool for it
It looked fun and right up your alley
You’re busy with work and he doesn’t close your laptop but he holds his phone over it so you can watch
You’re not too happy with the interruption but he just seems so excited, practically buzzing so you take the phone.
2 minutes and 42 seconds later, you’re up on your feet and buzzing with him
He’s quick to sift through your shared closet for things to wear (before everyone else decided to do it)
He’s got some pink dress shirts so he thinks he’ll be fine but you on the other hand
He’s not impressed by the lack of variety
There’s months before the film comes out but no, you need to be prepared and NOW
Practically dragging you to the mall to look for stuff because there is NO WAY you’re going to this film underdressed
He picks a hot pink skirt and white top that he thinks you would look cute in
He’s got surprisingly good taste, let's just say that and before you even open your purse, he’s paid for it.
As the release date gets closer and closer and more trailers come out, he has a new and even more brilliant idea
All black
“If you wanted to go to Oppenheimer instead, you could have said!”
He gasps in offence and pulls out the screen-cap that inspired him
“... also what is Oppenheimer exactly?”
“Yassine, I can’t wear a damn tiara!” “Why not?”
You end up having to wear the tiara
You spend about half an hour taking photos in the Barbie box before doing anything
He doesn’t post anything because he never posts anything but you certainly do and it gets reposted onto the Sevilla instagram because it’s just too darn cute
He cries at the Billie Eilish bit but gets over it quickly so you can jam to the Ice Spice remix together
“I promise you that I’m more of an Allen than a Ken, Angel. I would never believe in patriarchy! And I hate horses!” “...” “Okay I don’t hate horses but you get the idea!”
“So do you want to watch oppenheimer?” “Angel, I still don’t know what that is if I’m being completely honest.”
He thought that Barbenheimer was just a cool reference to how well the film was gonna do
“Why is it such a big deal that they come out at the same time? Mamma Mia and the Dark Knight also came out at the same time and no one said anything about that!”
You do end up watching for the sake of it but he’s not feeling it at all.
“Do you think that Cilian Murphy is more attractive than me?” “He could never.”
He’s quite pleased with that answer and he gets all blushy
He ends up dragging you to the next screen to watch barbie again right after for a ‘palette cleanser’
♡ Abde ♡
You’re definitely the one to push it in this instance
He’s young, like really young, so there is a little bit of an obsession with that macho image
Much less of it since he managed to win you over by letting it go but its still kinda there
Even with that, he may have read a couple of unflattering reviews (obviously from men) so he’s not got the best impression
It doesn’t take you long to convince him at all because the the way your eyes lit up is enough
He loves the idea of you dressing up all cute for it, happily help you pick an outfit but when you bring up the idea of HIM matching you, he’s not so keen
“Come on! What's wrong with a bit of pink? Most designer men’s clothes have a little bit of it!” “Yeah but that's different!” “Sure (!)”
You do manage to get his approval of one pink shirt but he’s a little bit sulky the whole way home and you give him the silent treatment for it
He respects your space but he ends up whining to his brother about it which feels like the biggest mistake when his mum overhears it; more of a blessing in disguise to be honest
“That girl puts up with so much of your nonsense and you can’t even put on a pink shirt for her Barbie thing without adding on even more nonsense? Ya Allah, forgive me I’ve raised a wannabe macho idiot for a son!”
His dad ends up overhearing as well and gets to a stern explanation
“In what world is pink girly? It’s a fucking colour, son. Any ‘man’ that associated a colour with being a girl is a west-washed little boy, you wear little necklaces and get an eyebrow slit but you draw the line at pink? I raised you better than that.”
His brother ends up chiming in too.
“Yeah man, it's a little scummy. It’s a pink shirt and two hours of your time, she used to wear that ugly yellow kit happily to matches AND she watches you play video games for way longer than that, and at least a movie might be more entertaining…”
At first he doesn’t really want to believe anything that they’ve said but he spends the evening pondering over it, only feeling more and more guilty and time passes by
“I’ll just watch it with my friends, it's fine!” but you’re obviously disappointed, he can see it written on your face and you don’t give him time to say anything as you walk away
He spends a good hour going back and forth with you about that, eventually just wrapping you up tight in his arms and apologising over and over again
“Pleeeeeeeeeeaaase take me! It’ll be fun, I swear! I’m a fun guy, am I not?” “You’ve changed your tune.”
“My parents didn’t raise a west-washed little boy, did they?” you don’t know what that means but you can’t really ask with your face pressed up against his neck.
“Should I grow out the eyebrow slit?”
You find the strength to pull away from him with that suggestion, “YES!”
To add to the apology, he lets you do his nails but refuses to let you push at his cuticles
Not that you need to do that anyway because his nails are beautifully shaped and you LOVED being able to paint them
He does indeed make it a fun experience when you go out for it and you get some really cute photos together
He spends a while getting photos of you in the booth on your own because you looked so damn adorable
During the film, he keeps pointing out the outfits he thinks would look good on you… so basically everything.
He’s intrigued by the giant fur coat but you immediately put a stop to that
“But look! it's so-” “Ugly! Looks like a freshly killed polar bear rug!”
By the end of the movie, you're both in tears and he gives you the biggest hug he can manage when you leave the theatre.
Its a genuine eye-opener for him
“I’m such a Ken, anjo!”
It's his awakening: he didn’t really like acting all hard and cool anyway and now he had a better understanding of just how dumb that mentality was.
Constantly talking about “boyfriend-girlfriend” things
You didn’t mind but you wished he would stop referring to it as that because you wanted him in all his glory and you didn’t need to be laughing in the middle of it.
♡ Hakim ♡
Its a cute little moment where you swap phones to show each other the trailers
He’s definitely more intrigued by Oppenheimer but he’s happy to watch barbie with you
Of course, so long as you watch Oppenheimer with him
Like Yassine, well beyond acting too cool for a movie and the colour pink
Your outfits match and are a mix of pink and black so you can really get into the spirit of the occasion
You match clothes quite often but it still makes him smile when you get excited and scan over the outfits
He honestly just liked doing stuff with you and vice versa
He’s not really bothered by what anyone thinks of him anymore
You watch Oppenheimer first and he can’t help but point out the things he told you about when he explained the movie to you
He has some of his own critiques and gripes too
He’s not impressed when he sees the American flag nor is he happy with the nudity but he’s okay with the film, overall.
Surprisingly enough, he was actually quite excited for barbie.
You had explained every little detail from the trailers and the underlying themes and easter eggs and he supposed that at least 1 live adaptation was ready to be faithful
You’re the more energetic watcher while he’s just extremely focused
Like his eyes don’t leave the screen once, he looks to be in deep thought
Although there is some palpable shock when Barbie is called a fascist
You’re worried when he hasn’t said anything by the end of the film, fearing that he was gonna be one of those
“Men really suck, huh?”
Big relief and you agree with a laugh
You spend ages talking about the little intricacies in the movies and the deeper messages, from when you get back into the car and well into the evening
He does post a little thing on his story: a blurry photo of the two of you
His brothers do tease him a little bit but they’d all watched it with their partners too and they were all in agreement: it was fantastic
They acted cool and stoic critics about it on the outside but the excitement on the inside was still evident
You pointed out one of the dresses from the movie that you loved, thinking he wasn’t paying attention but alas
He goes above and beyond to find a replica and eventually just settles on a tailor to make you a custom one
He has your measurements because he’s bought plenty of custom pieces for you already and he wouldn’t stand for anything less than perfection
If he was picky for himself, imagine how h would be for the love of his life
He gets a little slap-happy with it and ends up ordering like 4 custom outfits for you instead of one
He wondered about whether he should save them for special occasions but he concluded that he just couldn’t wait
I imagine you coming back from a long day at work and the outfits are laid out, in their garment bags
You assume that he maybe got himself some new jackets or something because that's pretty common for him
When you unzip the bags and obviously you’re surprised
“Do you like them?” “I mean yeah but… what?”
He can’t wait for you to process anything and he’s hurrying you to try it all on
Obviously you look absolutely stunning and the way he’s looking at you has you all nervous: partly because he always just looked at you like you hung the moon and stars but also you were slightly concerned that he was seconds away from tearing it off you
“Oh god, you’re such a barbie…” he knows exactly how big of a compliment that is, your beloved allen
♡ Nayef ♡
He definitely isn’t at Yassine and Hakim’s point where image isn’t that big of a deal but he’s an absolute sweetheart
Genuinely so positive and joyful, in that sense there’s a unique maturity about him
You call him over to watch the trailer with you and he doesn’t really understand but matches your excitement when you point out the little details
I feel like he would be doing a lot of his own research too, those youtube videos of people analysing the trailer frame-by-frame become his new obsession
I imagine he’d be getting into a lot of arguments on his burner twitter account with the bitter men trying to tear it down
He doesn’t care at all, he’s going to see barbie with you the first chance he gets and he’s going to find a matching outfit somewhere
You assumed he’d just find a pink shirt but no, he spends ages sifting through the internet for a ken inspired outfit that he could replicate and a barbie outfit for you, pink would not suffice on its own, you were gonna go all out with some proper references
He’s definitely the most Allen-esque of the boys, that's for sure
Proudly posts a photo of the pair of you on his story and your matching outfits with the reference on the side
He does get a lot of praise online for it for being so “brave” but he sees it as the bare minimum and doesn’t quite understand why it's such a big deal
Somehow he’s more excited than you at the theatre
And he somehow knows even more finer details than you as well, it’s kind of jarring
He LOVES the music and knows all the lyrics because he’s been listening to the album non-stop
He is in tears from America Ferrara’s beautiful speech
Constantly looking over at you like you’re a champions league trophy
The switch from emotional billie eilish to the upbeat ice spice remix is a bit of a shock but he just goes with it because at the end of the day, he’s having the time of his life with the movie
“You know I would love you no matter what, right?”
“Like you ARE extraordinary and perfect in every way but even if in some bizarro universe where you weren’t, I bet I would still be obsessed with you.”
And you fully believe him because he would drop anything and everything for you, no doubts in your mind whatsoever
I feel like he’d be so cheesy when you leave the theatre, like he’s carrying you to the car bridal style
He would also refer to the deed as “boyfriend-girlfriend stuff” for months
He would be dragged to Oppenheimer with his friends but he comes back home too you and he looks far from impressed
“Well it certainly wasn’t Barbie, I know that much!”
not my usual style but i just thought headcannons would be a better format since i got requests for all of them! i hope u enjoy, lovelies <3
#abde ezzalzouli#ez abde#footballer fic#football fluff#football fanfics#football fanfic#footballer x you#footballer x reader#footballer imagine#morocco#morocco nt#football imagines#football one shot#nayef aguerd#nayef x reader#nayef aguerd x reader#nayef aguerd imagine#footballer fanfiction#hakim ziyech#hakim ziyech x reader#hakim ziyech imagines#hakim ziyech imagine#hakim ziyech x you#hakim ziyech fluff#hakim ziyech fanfics#yassine bounou#yassine bono#yassine bounou x reader#yassine bounou fanfic#yassine bono x reader
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hi i hope you don't mind anons about this but i thought your post abt sns shippers re: ss was rly interesting! i think it's rly common for m/m shippers in general to look at a canon, poorly-developed m/f ship and laugh at the female character's plight like it's a sort of revenge for their m/m ship not being canon. i wanted to say though that i think the reason this is so prevalent among not only sns or nrt fans in general but also ppl who don't rly keep up with nrt as a whole (like all the viral memes and posts about how canon adult sske is a deadbeat dad, etc) is precisely because of the existence of boruto; i know you disregard that series entirely (bc duh lmao) but as someone who got morbidly curious enough to follow a decent bit of it - i truly don't think any other canon sequel in fiction has gone so far as to undermine its own canon ships. there's so many instances where you genuinely have no choice but to interpret the situation as sske and nrt each respectively being trapped in loveless marriages unless you're wearing glasses that are not merely rose-tinted, but ass-blasted with barbie tier pink paint. so unfortunately it makes sense that ppl make the jokes you mentioned in your post - the material is canon, but everyone is so OOC that the ppl laughing about it can still feel like they can ignore it as it's not the "true" canon that fits each character. imo it's like how comics fans laugh about their faves doing stupid things in like, the latest tom king run or zeb wells's new arc or whatever - it's "canon" but so clearly contradicts years of per-established material that ppl don't take it seriously, so they can criticize it without feeling like they're actually insulting the character. like there's so many spidey fans on reddit or twitter or whatever who obviously adore peter but also constantly share memes humiliating him or making him seem like this completely different, awful person bc it's commonly understood that this isn't the real(TM) pete. but ofc none of this negates ur broader point abt fandom misogyny, i just think this is why it's so prevalent wrt nrt's canon ships in particular, if that makes sense!
oh for sure like i wonder so often about what the landscape of the fandom would look like had so much post-canon content never been a thing to begin with. the fandom misogyny would still be there obv but like you implied it probably wouldn’t be as prevalent as it’s unfortunately become. i curse the existence of deadbeat dad sasuke everyday it’s so sad like there was so much potential going off of chapter 699 and nearly all of it went to waste 😭
#outbox#idk if i have spoken about it here specifically as opposed to on twt but this is also why i hate the last as a movie#like it makes nh look so fucking stupid and ridiculous omds it’s infuriating 😭#i wanted them to bond over their neji trauma and some library shenanigans i didn’t need the moon people shite!
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My various biographies for my original Fictif characters
(Taken from one of my now defunct Reddit accounts)
I was inspired by a post where someone was asking for inspiration for their own OC for FTLOG. I make my OCs original depending on the book. While their appearence/background may change, they're always a cis man with a muscular, thicc build. Here's a bit about them, since I don't have the time to give them SUPER detailed backgrounds (especially since I may end up contradicting canon). Sadly I am not an artist, so these are only descriptions!
Heir to Love and Lies
Cyrus Yehia--a mestizo man of Colombian, Egyptian, and Spanish descent. I picture him with black hair, a nice tan that gets deeper during his time in Columbian, and hazel eyes. I imagine him as being very self-conscious due to not having been in Colombia for years and now having to be there without his abuela. He's a skilled acrobat, and frequently uses it to observe those he's suspicious of. Being of a religious background, he has an affinity with Padre Joya--but that doesn't make him turn a blind eye to suspicious activity. He has a rocky relationship with the three LIs, but admires Val's genuine commitment to her job, Chava's protective nature, and Sergio's cleverness.
Last Legacy
Capricorn Visser--actually his name is Riven, but he was talking about his zodiac sign when he was brought to the world. He's a caucasian man with blonde hair and green eyes, and usually dresses in green or pink (imagine if Barbie and your favorite male lead in a video game had a son). While he's drawn to Saaros, Florian, and Escell, he eventually (thanks to canon) becomes attatched to our LIs. Personality-wise, his self-esteem sucks despite his looks and intellect, and generally bonds with Anissa and Felix due to them being less wild than Sage--but he's still very drawn to him.
Roadkill
Sterling Alenko--In my world, he has a dream of being a screenwriter, and this helps him to bond with Poe. He's also an African-Aborignee-American man known for his cool, stylish fashion that noteably distinguishes him from the casual dress the rest of the LIs wear (though his clothes are still functional). At the end of the show, he wears a romper and tea shades with a bucket hat. He's quite exciteable and thirsts for inspiration, making him somewhat manipulative with people in order to get information. Though downplays his phenomenal skills as an artist due to being indecisive as a child and his parents pressuring him to stay focused on something. He kinda has an existential crisis when finding out supernatural creatures exist and keeps garlic and silver with him at all times (though being the cool guy he is, makes it look fashionable and doesn't arouse any suspicions). I think he tries to undercut Poe's snarkiness and prevent Howie from being objectified when he gets to Hollywood, and recently Tess has taught him how to write songs! Out of laziness, I use the same OC for Snow Falling in Love (unless I change it last minute).
For the Love of Gods
See link: https://old.reddit.com/r/fictif/comments/wupf78/give_me_your_ocs_pleasee/
Courting the Crown
Avarice Kahale--Ignoring our father's design, I made him an PI-inspired character, explaining the culture as the consequence of colonialism (probably Italian-inspired). He dresses in blues, blacks, and silvers, largely due to still being in his grieving process and still kinda mourning. This distracts him from seeing certain warning signs that occur throughout the story. He's hesitant of Theo's advances given his past, as well as initially being shocked at Maeve's feelings for him. Gwydion's magical world and Rian's mystery makes him drawn to them in particular. There is an instance where Rian seduces him and drugs him to bring him back to Cetros, but when he changes his mind, it makes Avarice jump to his defense whenever anyone speaks ill of him. Before his mourning period, he was very Shikamaru Nara: very smart, but very lazy.
Two Against the World
Florence Chisholm--originally I was gonna name him Florian, but I think Nicky would enjoy the nod to Italy (he's actually of partial Italian descent), which also inspires him to use his grandfather's surname, Angelico. He's an auburn-haired, grey-eyed young man who's the son of lawyers and his fast-talking nature draws Nicky to him. While not into crime like Nicky, he's very charismatic, cheeky, and optimistic like he is, and matches Nicky's passion.
Catch me in Miami
Arthur Yakushi-Silva--called Arturo by Miguel, his father is an Brazilian immigrant, while his mother is of Japanese heritage (she was born in Brazil, though), he's a quick swimmer and runner, making him a good partner for Miguel. While hesitant of Miguel's criminal activity, his charm and family does eventually convince Arthur to helo get Miguel out of the game, and this sometimes brings out a darker side to his typically bubbly personality.
Hollywoodland
Rudolph Midthunder--A Native American man who I headcanon as going on to being a successful actor (though he occasionally has to get rid of his iconic glasses). He's big on not ruffling feathers, but has developed a passive-aggressive personality as a result of keeping his head down. He originally attempted to pursue a relationship with Liam and Billy, but when he realized how important he was to Celia, he discovered how much he loved her.
Ghosted
Emrys Hye-kyo--a young man and Jesse's crush. Known for his business-chic fashion, no one would've guessed they would've ended up together. Being very reasonable, he's quick to be scared off by Jesse's ghost and solving the mystery, but as his feelings for Jesse grow, he realizes he needs to solve the mystery for both of their pieces of mind.
Monster Manor
Noah Rhineheart--an experienced ghosthunter/investigator who's actually never had relationships before. Known for his distinctive green hair and grey eyes, the residents of the manor at first assume he's a new arrival. He's a quiet listener to Casamir and Rainier's troubles, which makes him worry that they don't really like him for him, so he adapts to make their relationship more equal and conversational in order for their feelings to bloom.
Into the Mist
Galilei--a young elf who falls for Fin. Hmm, there seems to be something missing. Dorian should finish the story to find out more.
Isle of Enchantment
Aeris Tyrian--a young black man yearning for adventure. Due to having several brothers, he bonds with Rogue over trying to find his sister. He is originally intimidated by Serena, but eventually warms up with her following their adventure together. His interest in fair tales makes him jump between awe and eagerness to caution and skepticism, so it was certainly a growing experience.
Lemme know if you have any questions about them!
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Check out this listing I just added to my Poshmark closet: Barbie 40th Anniversary 1999 Collector Edition Doll in Sealed Box.
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'The month of July 2023, saw an interesting instance of counterprogramming in Hollywood history. Two big-budget films produced by rival production camps- Warner Brothers and Universal Pictures- went head to head in cinemas targeting aesthetically opposite fan bases. Barbie by Greta Gerwig and Oppenheimer directed by Christopher Nolan had a lot in common, yet they could not be more different from each other. Both films were much anticipated, big-budget multi-starrers from two critically acclaimed directors who specialise in vastly different genres. On top of this, both Barbie and Oppenheimer were slated for release on the same day- 21st July.
However, in spite of the many similarities shared by both films, they belong to very different genres, exhibiting almost contradictory aesthetics and moods. Barbie is a fun adventure-comedy that explores the concepts of feminism and questions the neoliberal capitalism of corporations, albeit with generous splashes of bubblegum pink thrown in for good measure. On the other hand, Oppenheimer is a period piece, a dark and sombre biopic of nuclear physicist J. Robert. Oppenheimer, the creator of the atom bomb, and a sharp political and psychological drama all rolled into one.
Understanding the Barbenheimer phenomenon as a cultural moment
What the dual release of these two aesthetically antithetical films led to, would go down in film and pop culture history. The Barbenheimer cultural phenomenon is an internet and cultural trend started by fans of both films. A portmanteau of the words Barbie and Oppenheimer, it is a term that has not only become popular among certified cinephiles but also has found relevance in the current cultural discourse, especially for a generation which is chronically online.
Passionate, young film lovers, rejuvenated in their love for cinema and theatres after the two year long hiatus caused by the pandemic, made plans to turn up in cinema halls wearing myriad hues of pink for Barbie and dark muted tones for Oppenheimer. Some even wanted to catch both films in a single day, hurrying to multiplex washrooms for a quick genre-appropriate costume change before the second film starts.
While it was heartening to witness the festivities surrounding films, it is important to note the differences between the two target fan bases of Barbie and Oppenheimer. Barbie directed by Greta Gerwig, in all its pink-tinged glory, is a feminist clarion call to end patriarchy. The film attempts a feminist reclamation of the famous (and at times controversial) Barbie doll created by Ruth Handler and owned by the Mattel corporation.
Primarily targeted towards women who have been historically oppressed by patriarchy, the film condemns the abject vilification and degradation of all things feminine and girly, urging young women to embrace and feel powerful in their femininity. Through a metacinematic approach, the film also criticises corporate capitalism and the warped patriarchal double standards that exist for women in today’s neoliberal world. Judging by the teeming population of film enthusiasts, both male and female, all decked up in shades of pink, it is clear that Barbie succeeded in conveying its message to a great extent.
On the other hand, Christopher Nolan’s Oppenheimer attempts to examine history, power dynamics and the politics of scientific discovery. Marketed mainly towards STEM enthusiasts who also take an interest in history, Oppenheimer, like most of Nolan’s films, had aimed for a mostly male fan base. Addressing burning political questions of nuclear war and world dominance, Oppenheimer also manages to examine and explore the human condition and what it means to be powerful yet powerless at the same time.
Is Barbenheimer the latest battle of the sexes?
In order to understand the Barbenheimer phenomenon, it is imperative to examine how it reasserts the binaries between the masculine (Oppenheimer) and the feminine (Barbie). STEM chauvinists and self-proclaimed Nolan fanboys have already dismissed Barbie as a “silly” little girls’ film. Ben Shapiro’s scathing yet baseless criticism of Barbie on YouTube, deeming it to be a ‘man-hating’ film is a testament to that. An example of a more recent battle of the sexes and their differing and often opposing preferences, some aspects of the Barbenheimer phenomenon attempt to gender something like cinema, an artistic form that has the potential to transcend all gender stereotypes and barriers.
Dividing the Barbie and Oppenheimer fan bases on the basis of their sex and disparaging Barbie enthusiasts for having conventionally feminine interests is a sad reassertion of the highly problematic gender binary and gender roles.
It must be understood that it is not impossible to like both films equally, at the same time. Owing to the varying styles, forms, genres and aesthetics, it is only natural that both films cater to different needs and moods, variables that are not dependent on one’s assigned gender.
The problem with the Barbenheimer binary
By dividing the Barbie and Oppenheimer fan bases into water-tight compartments based solely on gender and assuming that ‘never shall the twain meet’, some proponents of the Barbenheimer craze run the risk of erasing the large intersection of individuals who enjoyed and are enthusiastic about both films, which are brilliant in their own right. It is indeed hilarious that a section of society is under the prejudiced assumption that individuals who like the Barbie-core aesthetic cannot harbour a deep interest in nuclear physics.
It is also strange to see certain people (who am I kidding? It is a section of straight cis men, of course) think that out of the two films, only Oppenheimer dealt with pressing political issues of our times while Barbie was just a flick about a bunch of “silly” girls parading in pink for a bunch of “silly” girls parading in pink on the other side of the screen, in the Real World. It is not surprising to see straight men denying the existence of a pressing socio-political issue like the patriarchy because it does not affect them. Naturally, it is impossible for these men to comprehend that beneath its sparkly pink-toned glitz of bright bubblegum pop, Barbie is a poignant satire of life under patriarchy and neoliberalism, a lived reality for all women.
The gendering of film that denigrates conventionally feminine interests has always been a part of the cinema culture. Binaristic gendering is apparent in every aspect of human life under consumerism. Right from clothes and books to jobs and interests, the capitalist market, joining hands with its best friend, the good old patriarchy, decides what people can or cannot consume. The normative interpretation of the Barbenheimer phenomenon is a testament to that.
However, despite misogynistic attacks and attempts at gendering from dudebros like Ben Shapiro and Piers Morgan, it is heartening to see how young film enthusiasts, irrespective of gender, enjoyed and appreciated Barbie and Oppenheimer. Moreover, seeing Cilian Murphy and Greta Gerwig refusing to participate in the imposed competition by hyping up each other’s films, in spite of generic differences, truly goes to show how culturally significant this moment is. These instances make us realise what an important impact films can have to foster diversity and inclusivity, one cinema ticket at a time.'
#Warner Bros#Universal#Greta Gerwig#Christopher Nolan#Oppenheimer#Barbie#Cillian Murphy#Barbenheimer
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To Be Wanted - Part 5: Oh What a Night
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Plus Size!Reader
Summary: All your life you have wanted to be loved by someone. But when you don’t look like most “beautiful” women, you learn to stop wanting. You’d never expect someone like the amazing, kind, beautiful Bucky Barnes would desire someone like you.
WC: 3.7k
A/N: ........I’m sorry
Series Masterlist / Series Playlist
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Text Message: Eli and Y/n
E:This is really fucked up, Y/n
Why won’t you talk to me? After everything we’ve been through?
You’re just gonna drop me like this?
At least show me some respect and fucking answer one message.
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“Ugh, I can’t wear this shirt. It shows off my stomach and I feel so fat.” Krissie pokes at her rock-hard abs peering through the white sequined crop top.
“Kris, you look amazing,” you reply, trying not to throttle her. “I literally do not know what you’re talking about.” You glance over at yourself in the full-length mirror in Krissie’s room and quickly look away, trying not to focus on how you look.
You had spent the rest of Thursday night and Friday afternoon digging through your closet to find the perfect outfit. Usually finding something to wear for a night out was already a miserable experience, but knowing that Bucky would be there, you felt even more anxious about looking as good as you could.
So, you pulled out the big guns and went for your best outfit. The one you only wore for the most special occasions.
Like, for instance, to try and impress a drop-dead gorgeous super soldier.
It’s a royal blue jumpsuit made out of crushed velvet. The top has short sleeves and a neckline that makes it look like you actually have cleavage (bless), and the bottom-half billows down at the calf, giving it the illusion of being a dress while also preventing chafing (again, bless). The mid-section is the part you were always most self-conscious about because it’s tight enough to show everyone what you have going on in that area, but also keeps everything held together in a way that doesn’t make you look pregnant like some other outfits did. You paired it with sparkly wedge-heels and simple jewelry, rocking some winged-eyeliner and a deep berry-red lipstick.
Wearing this outfit, you look good. You feel good.
But still, nothing can compete with your beautiful, petite, blonde best friend, who could wear a trash bag and still look amazing.
Everything about you is amazing. Bucky’s words from last night interrupt your regularly scheduled programming of internal self-loathing, and you smile to yourself.
There’s still a part of you that believes you had dreamt everything that had happened the night before. Bucky’s arms around you, telling you that he likes spending time with you, even after seeing all of the quirky, nerdy sides of you. And the way that he looked at you, like you were something to be treasured. Stephanie had been right, there’s something between the two of you that feels undeniably magnetic.
Is there a chance that things with Bucky are different? That he feels things stronger than friendship? You had tried your best to ignore those feelings yourself, but there’s no ignoring it now. You’ve fallen for Bucky big time, but if he only wants to be friends you would be okay with it, even though you want something more. So much more, and a rejection from him was going to be difficult to brush past. But he’s a genuinely good person and you aren’t going to throw your friendship away just because he, like everyone else, doesn’t see you that way.
You would work through it, because he’s worth it.
“How about this dress? Is it too much?” Krissie steps out of her closet in a gorgeous hot-pink bodycon sleeveless dress and nude heels. She looks like a real-life Barbie Doll.
“No,” you respond smiling, “You look freaking stunning, girl. I think we have a winner.”
Krissie looks at herself in the mirror and nods, smiling back at you. “I think you’re right.”
Krissie’s phone buzzes on her bed and she walks over to look at it. “Oh, shit,” she says, “That’s Elena. Her and Chris are heading to the subway now so we better get going. Are you ready?”
You look at yourself one last time in the mirror and force a smile. “Ready as I’ll ever be.”
“Y/n, you look totally gorgeous!” Krissie says, standing next to you and resting her head on your shoulder. She opens up the camera on her phone and holds it in front of the two of you. “Let’s take some selfies super quickly and then head out.” You smile at the camera as she snaps a few photos. You hope they don’t look too bad and that your eyes are open.
You pull out your phone and shoot a quick text to Bucky.
Hey! We are heading to the subway and should get to Astro’s in like 20. See you then!
Text bubbles pop up immediately and Bucky responds.
See you soon :)
“Um, what is that smile all about?” Krissie asks.
You jump and look at her, instinctively turning the screen away from her. “Nothing! I invited a friend to join us so I was just texting him to let him know we were leaving.”
“Him? It’s a guy?!”
“A friend, Krissie. We met the other day and he’s….relatively new to the area and is looking to make more friends. I figured it would be nice to invite him out tonight. Hope that’s okay!”
“Is he cute?”
Your heart stops, and you force a smile. “He’s okay.” You love Krissie very much, but the memory of her spilling all the dirty details of her hookup with Eli and the pain that caused you makes you nervous to give any information on Bucky. And how ridiculously cute he is. Too cute to be attracted to someone like you. But Krissie? Krissie’s definitely more in Bucky’s wheelhouse.
“Well, I guess I’ll be the judge of that when I see him,” she winks at you and your stomach drops to the floor. “I hope his favorite color is pink.”
You laugh weakly. “Shall we get going?”
Krissie grabs her clutch and the two of you head to the subway. There, you find Elena and her boyfriend, Chris. At the next stop, your other friends, Nick, Olivia, and Shelby hop on and you all hug and greet one another.
Finally, you get off the subway and head down the five blocks to Astro’s. It’s a club that was the group’s favorite spot to hit up when you were in college. Cheap drinks, fun flashy lights, decent music and a cramped dancefloor that made it so that everyone was dancing on top of one another. You always went to be a good sport and sometimes had fun when it was a girl’s night out and no boys, but on nights when the girls were looking for a hookup, you ended up abandoned at the bar while they danced with their chosen partners for the evening.
This is probably the most excited you’ve been to go to Astro’s, and the reason for that is standing just ahead of you.
Bucky Barnes is currently looking down at his phone which gives you a moment to openly gape at how freaking good he looks. He’s wearing a black-long sleeve shirt that is just slightly too tight and shows off every muscle on his ripped body. You steal a glance at his butt which looks excellent in his black skinny jeans. Your brain’s having a hard time processing how incredible someone can look in what would be considered a very simple outfit. But nothing about Bucky is simple. Everything about him is, well, incredible.
His left hand is buried in his pocket, and you wonder if he’s wearing his glove or not.
“Who is that?” Krissie says to you, eyebrows raised and you wince. Here we go, you think.
Clearly Krissie isn’t quiet enough when she says that because Bucky immediately looks up in your direction and his eyes find you.
No one else would be able to notice it, but you catch Bucky’s mouth falling open ever so slightly.
Wow, Bucky thinks to himself.
In fact, it’s the only thing he can think for a moment looking at you. How can it not?
You look absolutely and overwhelmingly beautiful.
That shade of blue against your skin is breathtaking. The way it shapes your body is a whole other thing that gets Bucky to think of other things that makes his face feel warm. He wants to feel that velvet, feel you.
But the part of you that Bucky finds himself most drawn to are your lips. How amazing they look in that color. How perfect they look when you smile upon seeing him.
He finds himself wondering what they might taste like.
You furrow your brows at him in confusion and he realizes he has been staring in silence for a little too long. He blinks rapidly a couple of times to break himself out of the spell you put him in and smiles at you as you walk toward him.
“Hey, Buck,” you say, almost dreamily. Your eyes are glued to his.
“Hey, Y/n.”
“You look good.”
Bucky chuckles, looking you up and down. “You look,” he says softly, “....amazing.”
Your eyes widen and you blush, giving him a gentle shove to his left arm. “Bucky,” you say sheepishly.
Bucky’s smile widens. “Just being honest, doll.”
“I’m sorry, I don’t think we’ve met before,” a small blonde woman in a tiny pink dress walks up next to Y/n and smiles at Bucky. She extends her hand out to him. “I’m Krissie.”
Bucky catches your smile drop the tiniest bit, then takes Krissie’s hand and shakes it. “I’m Bucky,” he says.
“Bucky,” Krissie says. “Well, Bucky, I’m so glad you came out tonight for my birthday. You’re Y/n’s friend, right?”
Bucky looks back to you and only nods, unwilling to verbally accept that the two of you are just friends. “Thanks for letting me crash your plans for tonight. I appreciate it.”
“Oh, you can crash anytime,” Krissie says with a wink and you feel like your heart is about to rip open. You’ve known Krissie long enough to notice when she’s on the hunt for a new hookup, and Bucky has just become her number one target for the evening. She gives you a quick side hug and heads inside with the group. “Make sure to save me a dance, Bucky.” Bucky gives her a small smile and turns back to you.
Don’t cry. Don’t cry.
“You okay?” Bucky asks.
You force yourself to keep your smile plastered to your face. “Yep! Totally fine. I mean, still not jazzed about spending the night in a stuffy room with drinks that taste as cheap as they cost, but I’m sure we’ll have fun.” Your smile falls as you give Bucky a more serious look. “How are you feeling?” you ask. “Are you anxious at all about being in such a loud, crowded place?”
The two of you have hardly spoken about Bucky’s past, but you knew some things about him being a POW and what he went through with Hydra. PTSD caused a wide variety of struggles, especially when it came to environments like this where every single stimuli was activated at once.
Bucky just shrugs. “A little,” he says. “But, to be honest, I’m always a little anxious. I actually feel slightly less so knowing that you’ll be there.”
The blush in your cheeks returns and so does your smile.
“You two coming or what?” Krissie yells at the entrance doors, waving at the two you to follow.
You sigh. “You ready?”
Bucky extends his arm out towards the entrance. “Lead the way, doll.”
You walk into the building and immediately feel the temperature rise by about 10 degrees and the place is already crowded with people, most of them getting up-close and personal on the dance floor.
Bucky can still see everything perfectly thanks to his heightened senses, but you have to narrow your eyes to adjust to the sudden darkness and flashing neon lights. You turn to face him and yell (the only way you can communicate in such a loud place) to ask if he wants to get a drink. He nods, and the two of you make your way to the bar.
One of the very few nice things about Astro’s is that very little has changed since you all started going there years back, including the staff. Since it’s Friday, your favorite bartender is working tonight. She gives you a big smile when she catches sight of you.
“Y/n!” She yells. “You look hot as hell, girl!”
You smile. “Thanks, Rhonda. How’s it going?”
“Oh, you know, same shit.” She raises her eyebrows over at Bucky. “Who’s your friend?”
“This is Bucky. Bucky, meet Rhonda, the only one in this place who knows how to make a decent drink.”
“Nice to meet you, ma’am,” Bucky says politely.
“Ma’am,” Rhonda cackles. “I like you, buddy.” She looks back and forth between the two of you and winks. “How about a round of shots for such excellent manners?”
You look at Bucky and raise your eyebrows. “I’m down if you are.”
“As if I could turn down a free drink,” Bucky says smiling.
Rhonda has two tequila shots in front of you before you can even turn to accept the offer and is already headed down the bar to get Krissie and your friends settled with drinks.
Bucky pulls his left hand out of his pocket for the first time so that he can grab both drinks and hands one to you, revealing his gloveless metal hand. You smile.
“Day two of no glove, Buck? I’m loving the confidence.”
Bucky looks at his metal hand and smiles back up at you. “Like I said, doll, you make me less anxious about a lot of things.”
Your smile widens and you raise your glass. “Cheers to that, then.”
“Cheers to you,” Bucky says back.
The shot trailing down your throat isn’t the only cause of the warmth spreading through your chest.
You try your best not to make a face at the biting taste of tequila and fail miserably, shuddering as you squish your face in reaction to the bitterness of it.
Bucky laughs. “You really know how to handle your alcohol, sweetheart.”
You narrow your eyes at him. “Sweetheart?”
Bucky frowns. “Too much?”
“No,” you respond quickly. Probably too quickly. “I mean, I don’t mind.”
The smile returns on Bucky’s face. “Good.”
“Alright, lovebirds,” Rhonda says, causing both you and Bucky to share the same sheepish gaze, taking a pause from ogling at one another, “What else can I get ya?”
You order your regular, gin and tonic, and Bucky gets a beer. He pulls out a 20 and hands it to Rhonda before you can even pull out your wallet. You try to fight him on it but then he winks at you and your brain becomes mush.
The two of you make your way over to the group, where Krissie is handing out shots to everyone. She walks over to you and Bucky and hands one to each of you. This time, Bucky does decline, saying something about how he rode his bike here and doesn’t want to go too crazy. To that, Krissie looks him dead in the eyes and shoots back his shot, not breaking eye contact as she licks the salt on her hand.
Bucky’s eyes widen and you grimace. The rest of the group cheers to Krissie, wishing her a happy birthday and takes their shots. You happily take the second shot so soon after your first, trying to quiet your brain that is currently spiraling thinking about the way Krissie was looking at Bucky.
Suddenly, your phone buzzes and you look down at it. It’s Eli, again.
Hey baby, you free tonight? I just wanna talk.
“Who’s that?” Krissie asks, trying to look at your phone. You lock your screen quickly so she can’t see anything.
You didn’t realize that Bucky had read it from the corner of his eye and was quietly panicking.
You grimace. “Eli.”
“Ohhhh Eli! How is he? You should invite him out!”
“Um, I think he’s busy tonight. Plus he and I don’t really talk much anymore.”
“Why not? You two were, like, best friends.”
You look at Bucky, who is pretending to be too busy staring ahead in the distance to care about what you and Krissie are discussing.
“Things change, Kris. Eli isn’t who I thought he was. Plus, he doesn’t need me now that he has Cassie.”
Krissie raises her eyebrows at you. “Y/n, you know he and Cassie broke up, right?”
You blink.
You blink again.
“What?”
Krissie nods. “Yeah, I guess everything was different when she returned from The Blip. He dumped her last week. She’s devastated.
All of the blood drains from your body. Bucky thinks you look like you’re about to pass out and almost puts his hand at the small of your back to keep you steady, but refrains from doing so.
Finally, you shake your head and laugh. “What an asshole,” you mutter so that no one can hear it. Well, other than Bucky.
“What?” Krissie asks.
“Nothing,” you say more loudly. “I’m gonna run to the bathroom.”
Krissie nods. You look to Bucky to find him gazing at you with concern in his eyes, and smile to try to ease his worry. You hand him your drink and head over to the bathroom.
First, though, you sneak to the back corner of the bar and ask Rhonda for another shot.
She gives you a look. “Bad night, babe?”
“You have no idea.”
She laughs. “Hopefully this will help. Usually it doesn’t, but I still hope it does.”
“Thanks, Rhonda.” You give her a weak smile before walking into the bathroom.
Bucky watches you leave for the bathroom for as long as he can until you disappear into a corner and he immediately becomes anxious.
Relax, Bucky, she is a grown adult who can handle herself.
Still, he doesn’t like the idea of you being alone in a place like this. Especially after seeing the way your demeanor changed once Krissie told you about this Eli guy. The same guy that had texted you last night.
Krissie places her hand on Bucky’s arm and he flinches slightly.
“Come on, Bucky,” she says, smiling at him in a way that makes him uncomfortable. “Let’s dance.” She pulls on his arm to lead him to the dance floor.
Bucky stands firm in his spot and looks back to where he last saw you. “Why don’t you go and I’ll wait for Y/n to get back.”
Krissie pouts. “Come onnn, Bucky,” she whines. “Y/n will be back, in like, a second. She knows this place and will be able to find us.” She grabs his hand and pulls harder. “Plus, it’s my birthday. You can’t say no to me.” She winks at him.
Bucky frowns, looking back one last time at the bathroom and then letting his body loosen up, stepping behind Krissie as she drags him over to dance.
It was a terrible mistake.
She’s on top of him in an instant, trying to grind her body on his and getting as much of her to touch as much of him as possible. Bucky keeps attempting to back away to put some distance between the two of them, but Krissie just keeps moving closer. He feels the urge to push her away with enough force for her to get the message without being rough, but he doesn’t want to be rude to your friend. He looks back over to the bathrooms, anxiously waiting for you to get back and rescue him.
The bathrooms here are as disgusting as you could imagine for a run down club such as this one. The smell is awful, every inch has been written or drawn on with marker, and each stall looks like it hasn’t been cleaned...ever.
You walk up to one of the sinks and lean your hands on either side of the porcelain, looking up and stare at yourself in the mirror just above.
You had expected yourself to feel some mixture of sadness and relief hearing the news about Eli and Cassie. Sad that her heart was broken and that they couldn't work it out. Relieved and possibly excited at the idea of Eli no longer being taken?
But no. Instead, all you feel is rage.
Rage that Eli put you through everything that he did, even though it apparently wasn’t what he wanted. That he had thrown away everything that the two of you had shared, just to be with someone he didn't actually want to be with. He had broken your heart in a million pieces just so he could break someone else’s.
Then, once the rage subsides, you do end up surprisingly feeling a sense of relief. Relief that you got out of that situation. That Eli was the one to end it. Because if he hadn’t, you probably would have still been with him.
Meaning he would have been here tonight instead of Bucky.
So even though the years of pain and heartache you experience after Eli left you broken were awful and at times unbearable, you were grateful that it had brought you to this moment. That it led you down a path that included Bucky.
You think back to the way he looked at you tonight outside Astro’s. You had never felt more beautiful in that moment. Eli had never looked at you like that.
Eli looked at you like you were the only girl in the room because you were the only one in the room. Bucky looked at you as if you were the only one he wanted to keeps his eyes on for the rest of his life.
Bucky wanted you.
You understand that now.
Smiling to yourself, you quickly wash your hands (because even touching just the sink in this place was disgusting), and run back out, eyes roaming the club for Bucky.
You stop short when you get to the edge of the dancefloor and your smile disappears.
Because your eyes finally land on Bucky, right as Krissie leans in to take his mouth into hers.
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Next Chapter
I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry!! I had to!!! My brain made me do it!! I’ll fix it I promise just be patient with me. <3
Tags: @ceo-of-daichi @biiskuitx @forgetthisbull @eclipses-and-moondust @abcdefxkyou @jackiehollanderr @billionsofbeans @abitgryffindorky @lovelylostminds @mija-just-breathe @semlohkratz @bratty-longbottom-replies @carrotfantasimp @cremedelabrulee @ant1r3al1ty @th-e-mg @laura-moehrchen @emma-the-duck17
Let me know if you’d like to be added to the list!
#bucky#bucky barnes#bucky x reader#bucky x you#marvel#mcu#bucky fanfic#bucky fanfiction#fanfic#fanfiction#angst#im sorry#sebastian stan#bucky barnes fic#to be wanted
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By GLEN OWEN and JAMES HEALE FOR THE MAIL ON SUNDAY
Tomboys must not be encouraged to think they should change sex just because of the way they like to dress or play, schools have been told.
The guidelines come in new Government instructions for teachers talking to children about transgender issues. The move has led to calls for controversial transgender charities such as Mermaids to be barred from any role in education.
It comes after Equalities Minister Liz Truss announced that the Government has rejected calls from trans-rights campaigners to allow adults to change their legal gender at will.
Ministers have now followed up by telling schools to reject teaching materials that encourage children to question their gender if they like clothes and toys usually associated with the opposite sex.
NHS figures show the number of girls seeking to change gender and become boys has risen sharply in recent years. Some experts believe it is because tomboys who do not feel comfortable with stereotypically female clothing and activities are being pushed to believe they are ‘born in the wrong body’.
The new schools guidance has been hailed as a major breakthrough by parents who fear that trans groups are encouraging children to change gender because of the clothes they choose to wear or the toys they play with.
‘You should not reinforce harmful stereotypes, for instance by suggesting that children might be a different gender based on their personality and interests or the clothes they prefer to wear,’ the Department for Education advice tells schools. ‘Resources used in teaching about this topic must always be age-appropriate and evidence-based.
‘Materials which suggest that non-conformity to gender stereotypes should be seen as synonymous with having a different gender identity should not be used and you should not work with external agencies or organisations that produce such material.’
That has focused attention on the work of Mermaids, a prominent trans-rights charity that provides training for public sector bodies.
One Mermaids training course last year involved a 12-point ‘gender spectrum’, ranging from a Barbie doll in a pink dress at the ‘female’ side to a GI Joe in military fatigues at the opposite, ‘male’ end.
The new guidance has been issued following a lengthy campaign by groups that question the medical transition of children.
Stephanie Davies-Arai, of Transgender Trend, said: ‘This is what we have been calling for. We are very glad to see this guidance.’
The Safe Schools Alliance said the guidance should mean Mermaids is now blocked from any role in training teachers or advising schools.
It said: ‘This guidance makes clear that Mermaids are not suitable to train teachers and schools. All policies that they or organisations partnered with them have consulted on, must now be reviewed.’
Mermaids told The Mail on Sunday that while the charity offers training for teachers, it does not offer classroom talks and lesson materials for pupils in England and Wales, and so would be unaffected by the rule changes that were announced last week.
A spokesman said: ‘Contrary to a great deal of speculation online, we do not suggest that toy and clothing choices are a sole or primary signifier of a child’s gender identity.
‘However, like any child, trans children will sometimes express part of who they are by choosing particular toys and clothes.
‘We accept this point requires careful and subtle expression and we’re working hard to improve the clarity of our messaging.’
-*-*-*-
Found the source of the most recent backpedalling campaign! The article up there ^^^
Mermaids is doing damage control, since the daily mail has a huge readership, especially in the working / middle class. Note the use of the term 'tomboy' and how accessible and easy to understand the article is. It's not something you can counteract with Judith Butler-like word vomit.
And now, they hilariously copy talking points they used to vilify.
Let's keep on monitoring the whole thing, that's going to get more and more interesting.
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usually, when someone thinks of linked universe, they don’t think about katy perry. however, her hit song “last friday night” is actually a perfect linked universe song, as each verse of the song corresponds to a link’s adventure and individual struggles. despite its peppy beat, in this essay i will prove how “last friday night” is actually a song made for linked universe, a legend of zelda au created by tumblr user jojo56830.
the opening segment of “last friday night” corresponds with the link of breath of the wild, nicknamed wild. the singer describes the act of waking up:
There's a stranger in my bed / There's a pounding in my head / Glitter all over the room / Pink flamingos in the pool
wild, who struggles with his failure of defeating ganon 100 years ago in breath of the wild, cannot reconcile his “past self” with who he is. he, too, also wakes up in a bed in a weak state, as he starts the game with only three hearts. the last two lyrics also describe the landscape of breath of the wild, which is strange but wondrous as well.
the next verse corresponds with warriors, the link from hyrule warriors. as the singer continues (warning for mentioned alcohol):
I smell like a minibar / DJ's passed out in the yard / Barbies on the barbecue / This a hickey or a bruise?
the second and third lyric can be interpreted as the many people who arrive from different timelines to warriors’ hyrule, one of the problems he confronts in the war of eras. moreover, the last line also references cia’s obsession with warriors, as while she is an enemy in the game, she is also in love with him. thus it makes sense if she gave him a wound that is either one made from violence or from her obsession with him.
continuing in the song, we get the lyrics:
Pictures of last night ended up online / I'm screwed, oh, well / It's a blacked out blur, but I'm pretty sure it ruled / Damn
this verse goes to sky, as his legacy as the chosen hero—or in this case, “pictures”—end up influencing the rest of the legend of zelda series. he himself feels immense guilt toward the situation, which would align with the “i’m screwed” lyric. the “blacked out blur” also references his tendency to sleep, due to his reoccurring nightmares of the imprisoned, so the chance to sleep properly “rules.”
skipping a section of the chorus, we end up getting to the titular portion of the song:
Last Friday night / Yeah, I think we broke the law / Always say we're gonna stop, whoa / This Friday night, do it all again / But this Friday night, do it all again
this applies to the entire legend of zelda franchise, as the hero must bend the rules sometimes in order to complete his quest: sneaking into gerudo town, kidnapping the princess, etc. moreover, the cycle repeats, despite everyone’s efforts; “this Friday night, do it all again” would imply the beginning of the cycle once more.
now in the second set of verses, the singer talks about the issues they have with recalling the night before:
Trying to connect the dots / Don't know what to tell my boss / Think the city towed my car / Chandelier is on the floor
this verse applies perfectly to twilight, as he struggles to figure out the mystery of the hero’s shade/midna’s identity/why he is in hyrule castle’s dungeon. “don’t know what to tell my boss” can also reference his struggle to confess that he is the wolf to the villagers of ordon, or how to tell time that he is the hero’s shade. the third lyric also references time and twilight’s familial connection through epona: if time is the city and “took” epona, then twilight follows back his origins to lon lon ranch.
continuing on, we also get to the verse which describes the hero of legend’s adventures:
Ripped my favorite party dress / Warrant's out for my arrest / Think I need a ginger ale / That was such an epic fail
legend, who has gone on a fashion adventure in the game “triforce heroes” as well as having different sets of protective tunics, is also the only link who is technically wearing a “dress.” he is also the only one who has a plausible warrant for his arrest, as he kidnaps the princess in a link to the past; he also has a bad relationship with the hyrule knights. “think i need a ginger ale” would describe legend’s averse nature to going on another big quest, given how tired he is of all the ordeals he’s gone through, and “that was such an epic fail” could reference his biggest guilt: Koholint, which he failed to save the inhabitants.
we get another repeat verse in the song at this point. this one describes hyrule, as:
Pictures of last night ended up online / I'm screwed, oh, well / It's a blacked out blur, but I'm pretty sure it ruled / Damn
the first two lyrics describe his dilemma in zelda 2, where if he sheds any blood, ganon’s minions will be able to resurrect him. this is only due to hyrule’s previous adventure, aka “pictures of last night”, and he is “screwed” because of this. further, “blacked out blur” could reference either his origins in zelda 1 (getting the sword from the cave) or waking up the zelda in the second game. not only that, but this verse is also a pun; “pretty sure it ruled” can reference his hero’s title, and that he is also implied to become the future king of hyrule in zelda 2 by fulfilling the prophecy of waking aurora up.
as previously stated, the chorus applies overall to the adventures of link the hero and the continuous reincarnation cycle that occurs throughout the games. now we arrive at the bridge, where the singers chant “T.G.I.F” six times. this is a reference to four, as there are four letters for the four parts of him. moreover, much of four’s adventures revolve putting a stop to someone’s evil schemes, such as vaati. thus the “thank goodness it’s Friday” chant, or “TGIF”, would represent the end of vaati’s shenanigans.
this is the end of individual verses which apply to specific links of linked universe; however, every instance of “Think we kissed, but I forgot” in the chorus is time talking about Malon. the “I forgot” references his past relationship to her in ocarina of time, while the “think we kissed” refers to their current relationship.
so while our minds may not initially jump to Katy Perry when we think of linked universe, we shouldn’t be too hasty to rule her songs out. as “last friday night” has proven to be incredibly applicable to linked universe and describing each link’s individual struggle, thus explaining why it is the perfect song for linked universe.
#mochis mumbles#linked universe#linkeduniverse#dump post#if the read more fails idk what I’ll do#cry probably#i’m gonna cry. like i’m gonna cry.#im in tears over this. I don’t know how to feel#what am I supposed to do with this#had a whole mental breakdown
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please,,, even if you dont answer this publicly i wanna know your In Depth Thoughts on fanon klaus and the issues w him bc i also have issues w fanon klaus but i cant put it in words
This got SO LONG, so I hope you meant it when you said you wanted in depth! Holy shit I sorta lost my mind on this.
In my early days as a bear-poker in this fandom, I described fanon!Klaus as that person who gets resurrected in a horror movie and comes back different. As an audience member, I can tell he's wrong, but nobody interacting with him directly seems to know this. I've also talked a little bit about Klaus and intelligence before, which plays into any discussion about fanon!Klaus, but I'll be more specific here. Before I get started, I wanna say that fandom is a fun space and I don't think anyone is *bad* for creating/enjoying fanon!Klaus, especially not for the third reason I lay out. I just think he's awful, and has some harmful roots that I doubt the people writing him even know about on a conscious level.
Okay, let's get into this. Because I'm me and Wittgenstein's early work that he later disagreed with has changed my entire way of interacting with the world, I'm gonna define my terms. Let's talk about what fanon!Klaus is LIKE before we talk about why I REALLY DON'T LIKE HIM. Fanon!Klaus is a happy, stupid, sweet, childish, bubbly, luminous free spirit. He wears bubblegum pink skirts and he cries when Diego eats his cookies. He doesn't know what numbers are, he can't count, he can't walk and chew gum, he thinks that Africa is a country, he forgets that homophobia exists, he doesn't know that drugs are bad for him, the list goes on (These are all real examples. Can you tell what part of fanon annoys me the most?). He cries at the drop of a hat, and doesn't understand his place in the family. He'd move heaven and earth to help the people around him, and he'd never be mean to anyone but Luther (and even then just barely) He constantly needs attention, supervision, etc. He makes jokes about modern memes and listens exclusively to pop music. He's really damaged but it's only because nobody Took Care Of Him and he needs someone to Rescue Him.
Canon Klaus is mean, and quick, and sharp, and miserable, and hiding, and funny because you're laughing WITH him, and an old soul, and a goth, and chronically apathetic, and selfish, and so fucking smart, and acutely aware of just how much he matters to other people. He makes rape jokes, he figures out how to get info on the eye while high out of his mind, he speaks like 10 languages, he listens to Nina Simone, he uses people's inherent fear of the dead to buy himself time, he finds the perfect story within the dead to cause a rift, he tells Luther TO HIS FACE that he doesn't care if the world ends. Klaus is a fascinating study in queer trauma, and robbing him of these traits is a complete disservice to yourself AND the character.
I say this often about fanon!Klaus, but WHO IS THIS??? Like…. Okay, if I gave you this list and you didn't know it was about Klaus, would you think it was? I think he's literally unrecognizable. He's not any of the things I know or love about Klaus. He's nobody to me, except a nuisance wearing the same skin suit and clogging the tags. He is also, weirdly, the most popular character in the entire fandom. I wanna think about why, and I have 3 theories that I think can all be true separately or simultaneously instance to instance.
First, fanon!Klaus exists because of internalized homophobia, classism, and anti-addict rhetoric. I think that on some level people don't believe addicts, feminine queer men, or homeless people are capable of intelligence. I think people see Klaus's canonical positive traits and they sort of throw them out the window because they don't make sense with their world view. A queer addict is a helpless tragedy, and he's someone that needs rescuing by Kind Strong Dave. A queer addict can't be smart, because then he wouldn't be an addict. A queer addict can't be wily, or interesting, because then he wouldn't be an addict. Fandom sees a feminine queer mlm and knows he should be in a sparkly bubblegum pink skirt, and saying "dahling" or "wig" or whatever else all the time. They know he should be bashful and submissive and always falling into the arms of Kind Strong Dave who protects him from Evil. They also know he should really, really like Britney Spears, and not give a shit about Nina Simone.
Second, fanon!Klaus exists because people want to excuse negative behavior in their favorite characters. Klaus is selfish and mean and apathetic. He just is. These are flaws that haunt him, and define a lot of his interactions. These are, also, pretty tough flaws to excuse (which… Hey…. I have a solution for that). I think that fanon Klaus, who just doesn't GET that he's being mean, and is too stupid not to become an addict (I don't think addiction is a flaw, but I do think that addiction plays into this), and is too out of touch and childish to understand that he shouldn't just fucking leave, comes from a place of wanting Klaus to be a good person who does good things. I'm sorry, but he isn't. Not always. I think the impulse to make him constantly sweet and constantly stupid comes from wanting Klaus's actions to be fundamentally excusable. He can't help it! He's just too much of a useless twink to know that it's bad to lie! (also, side note, fanon!Ben comes from this side of fanon!Klaus. In canon, Klaus is self destructing on purpose and Ben's presence helps…. Maybe, possibly, twice. In fanon, Klaus is just stupid and he needs a babysitter and that is Ben, the motiveless, endlessly loving but Exhausted braincell holder. This is fucked up on many levels. Ben is an asshole, and we all need to get used to that idea quick).
The third and final reason is that fanon!Klaus is… More fun, in the traditional sense of the word. Fanon!Klaus seems like he comes from a very emotional romcom or sitcom or something. He's like a barbie. He's fun to play dress-up with. He's fun to make incorrect quotes about. He's fun to write about, especially when it's about his siblings herding him or coddling him. Good ol' useless, loveable Klaus. I think this is partially because Klaus is a pretty fucking heavy character. He's a traumatized homeless queer drug addict, and that's sort of hard to make jokey fandom content about. Not impossible, I don't think, but not easy. This isn't to say that angsty fandom content isn't guilty of fanon!Klaus, though. It absolutely is. Often when Klaus willingly shares his feelings, or cries in front of someone, or asks for help for something more intense than tying him to a chair, it's fanon!Klaus. Hell, any time he GETS rescued it's teetering into that territory. He's still completely devoid of all of the grit and intrigue of canon, but he's fun to write about, and fun to project onto, and fun to rescue. He's also EASIER to write. People know that Klaus is a funny character, they know they laugh when he's on screen, but it is WAY harder to write a character you're laughing with than it is to write a character you're laughing at. It's WAY easier to write a character who moves your angst plot on by asking for help, or necessitating rescuing, than it is to work out how these things would happen without initiation. I get it, and in spite of the length of this, I don't think it's the end of the world.
I guess as I close this out, I would remind everyone that Klaus is smart, and mean, and over 30 years old. He's not a babe in the woods, or a damsel in distress, or a useless silly junkie twink. I promise that the real Klaus is worth the time and effort it takes to engage with him.
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Propinquity (Law of Seesaw)
→ [6/7] of the Glossary Series
→ summary: You first meet him on a seesaw. What a surprise, your relationship with him is exactly like that of a seesaw too—there are ceaseless ups and downs. So much so that you wonder when it’ll end.
→ pairing/rating: yoongi x reader | PG-13
→ genre: 50% fluff, 33% angst, 17% crack | e2l!au
→ warnings: profanity, mean insults
→ wordcount: 9.2k
♫: Seesaw by BTS
You can't remember the last time you've gone a week without fighting.
There is always a new problem that arises. A new argument that is sparked from the depths of trivial problems. Then Yoongi stops talking to you for a day (or days if the fight is serious) and sleeps downstairs on the couch until he wants to crawl back to you and apologize. Other times, you're the one who has to drag yourself to your boyfriend's study with a plate of his favorite fruit and an apology in your head.
But it seems like the fighting never ends.
Now the bed feels cold. It is empty. Just like you.
You know that Yoongi's downstairs, either working with his new client (through the dead of the night) or already sleeping on the small couch. Though you're supposed to be mad at him, you worry. The couch isn't good for his already deteriorating posture. But you can't nag at him now. It'll result in more arguments.
When was the last time you and Yoongi didn't fight, though?
The correct answer is never.
From day one, you and Yoongi were destined enemies.
"Hi." You're a proud little child, standing up straight with your hands on your hips. A bit chubby and round in the middle but you flaunt the extra weight. "My mommy says I need to make friends before kindergarten starts."
"My mommy says not to talk to strangers." The young boy peeks at you through his shaggy black hair. He rocks the paint-nicked seesaw by himself, kicking his feet off the ground only to come back down with a light oof.
"I'm not a stranger," you scoff, crossing your hands over your chest. "Let me play on the seesaw!"
Yoongi doesn't even have time to answer because you're crawling up on the opposite side already. "H-Hey!" he yells but he's too late. The moment you innocently perch upon the seesaw, you’re slammed to the ground and Yoongi's lifted up high in the air.
Ah, the weight difference.
"GET ME OFF!" Yoongi screams. "GET ME OFF!!"
Your eyes turn wide. You hadn't meant to scare the boy. You thought everyone wanted to fly up in the air, and you were just granting the little boy's wish. In your head, you didn't even think of the possibility that Yoongi is afraid of heights. (Which was stupid of him to even try playing on the seesaw in the first place.)
"GET OFF!" Yoongi yells viciously at you. His face has turned a bright shade of pink and purple.
You think he looks like he's about to suffocate.
"I'M SORRY!" you shriek as you dive off the seesaw.
Yoongi lets out a high-pitched, ear-piercing scream as he subsequently flings off the seesaw. He lands on his butt several centimeters away from the rusty playground equipment and bursts out crying.
You gasp. Oh no. This was bad. Very, very bad. So you do the first thing that comes to your head: run away.
The boy's cries become louder and louder as you sprint in the opposite direction, but you grit your teeth and dash on. Eventually, your guilt for throwing off a boy from the playground seesaw dissipates when your mother buys you ice cream for lunch. Food is always the solution.
You have no idea that day you accidentally made a little boy cry was the day you met your future boyfriend. You just thought you met a crybaby coward.
And he thought he met the devil. If the devil was a chubby little girl with chipmunk cheeks and rolls on her arms.
You two had no idea you would meet again.
So far, the first day of kindergarten isn't going so great. All the other girls brought their barbies to class. You brought your stuffed animal snake—Mr. Slithers.
And now the other girls don't really like you. Because "snakes are icky!" Their words, not yours.
If they only knew this week was a rainforest theme in your head. Every day of the week, you would prepare to bring a new stuffed animal that lived in the rainforest. Today would be the green snake, then tomorrow, the tree frog and so on. But no one applauds your genius planning skills.
So you mope around for half of the day. The girls are playing princesses with their stupid barbies and they won't let you join because a snake cannot wear a ball gown.
You end up poking at the seesaw in the kindergarten playground. It's boring when there's no one else to sit on the other side. Mr. Slithers isn't heavy enough to seesaw with you either. You want your mommy.
"You!" a high-pitched voice shrieks.
Jumping, you whip your head around to see the little boy. No. The same little boy who you accidentally flung backward on the seesaw.
"Are you gonna throw me off the seesaw again?" he yells. For such a skinny little boy he has quite a loud voice.
"I didn't mean it!" you yell back.
"You need to apologize to me!"
"No!"
You run away again.
And just like a real big stupidhead, Yoongi tattletales on you to the kindergarten teacher, Mr. Kim. In your defense, you didn't even do anything to Yoongi at kindergarten, so Mr. Kim can't make you apologize to stupid Min Yoongi.
Mr. Kim agrees with your defense. But he doesn't approve of you using the word, stupid, so you have to apologize to Yoongi anyways. While you're positively livid, Yoongi is triumphant.
That is only the start of the rivalry.
In first grade, Yoongi calls you fat.
You aren't normally one to waste your time tattling to the adults, but Yoongi did it to you in kindergarten so it only feels right to get revenge. But apparently calling someone fat is much worse than calling someone stupid. Yoongi has to apologize to you and he has to sit in the time out corner. He also gets a call home so his parents are notified of his bad behavior.
In second grade, you start losing weight. Not because Yoongi called you fat. But because you figured you should start exercising to be as healthy as your gym rat parents. When you tell the second-grade class you want to become a football star and you've planned out your whole athletic pathway, Yoongi is the first one to rudely laugh at you. So you make sure to boo his presentation when he brags about writing a whole book by himself (it's called Dot Goes to School—pretty mediocre stuff). Both of you have your recess privileges taken away.
Staying in for recess with someone you absolutely despise is not worth the satisfaction you got from teasing them. So you and Yoongi become more discreet in your never-ending ways to spite each other.
In third grade, Yoongi calls you a stick during recess. He makes sure to say it loud enough so you can hear his insult but not as loud so the playground monitor doesn't hear. Sneaky brat. You turn to him with flashing eyes and tell him very upfrontly, "Says you."
The rivalry still exists in fourth grade, when both of you feel like you're too old to play on the playground. The seesaw incident is still ingrained in the backs of both of your heads, though. So even when you and Yoongi have your separate groups of friends, you still manage to be mean to each other.
For instance, the day before the annual fourth-grade square dance, you and your new group of friends spread a rumor that Yoongi has cooties. As a result, no one wants to be his partner the next day.
But then your partner, that brat, Park Jimin calls in sick on D-Day and so your plan backfires in your face. You dance with Yoongi. And now you have cooties too.
In fifth grade, girls are starting to talk about boys during recess. When the shy, cute Gayoung confesses her crush on Min Yoongi, you have to excuse yourself from the friend group. Instead, you go out on the fields to play soccer with the guys. Thankfully, cooties are 'for babies' in fifth grade, so you have free reign with the boys.
Park Jimin confesses he likes you in sixth grade. He tells you that you are pretty. But his confession was definitely not in your schedule. You're supposed to go to swim practice in five minutes. So you wave him off. Not because you hate him. But let's face it. The boy ditched you in fourth grade and you had to dance with Yoongi. Plus, now Jimin's Yoongi's friend. There is no way in hell you are going to butt noses with Yoongi's friend.
The whole grade goes in an uproar when they find out you rejected Jimin. You couldn't care less.
Seventh grade is weird. You finally get your period. And the new sex-ed class collectively makes everyone embarrassed. It also starts the influx of period jokes from yours truly, the boys. Whenever a girl is in a bad mood, the boys yell, "YOU MUST BE ON YOUR PERIOD!" You make note of every guy who says this. Then the second time they yell that to a poor girl, you hold up a tampon with ketchup on it. It shuts them up so well that all the girls in your grade start to carry around tampons and ketchup packets.
Surprisingly enough, Yoongi isn't part of the rowdy group of boys who make insulting period jokes. He's gotten much quieter over the years (middle school must've brought some sort of maturity on him), but he still finds ways to make your life miserable.
When there are rumors that Jimin will ask you out to the Halloween dance, you actually prepare to accept—maybe just to spite Yoongi. But turns out the whole rumor was a lie made up by the boy you despise. So you're rendered embarrassed.
In eighth grade, to your surprise, Gayoung asks Yoongi out. Of course, Yoongi would say yes. He knows you hate Gayoung. She had grown ample boobs and fit in with the popular girls who talked about boy bands and got dress-coded every day. You have no idea why such a popular girl would ask out a nerdy, rat-faced boy. But apparently, Yoongi is conventionally handsome. What a load of bullcrap.
It irks you even more when they become a revolutionary couple—the first time a girl has asked out a boy.
You make a bet with your friends that the couple won't last a week. Your wallet cries that year. You lose nearly ₩30,000.
By tenth grade, they are still dating.
You're starting to wonder if Yoongi somehow got his grubby hands on a love potion. There's just no way that whiny asshole can keep a girlfriend for that long. But according to your friend who is friends with the friends of the friends of Gayoung's friends, Yoongi is a good boyfriend. You want to gut yourself after hearing that.
Gayoung is always bragging about how Yoongi buys her flowers before class, and she makes sure everyone knows of this by posting pictures of the aromatic bouquets on Instagram. Yoongi often writes her little love poems and short stories, and though you're 100% sure Gayoung doesn't read them, she posts those online too. God, she is so annoying that you unfollow her. (You've blocked Yoongi's account a long time ago.)
For the most part, though, when hating Yoongi is not on your mind, your life is pretty normal. And you're definitely content. You and a sporty transfer student from America, Jungkook, have hit it off. It's fun taking him around everywhere to taste test all the convenience stores in Korea.
Until the day you catch Jimin and Gayoung lip-locking behind your favorite kimbap store. You and Jungkook look at each other with wide eyes. Before Jungkook can stop you, you snap a quick picture of the action and run away, tugging your friend along with you.
"Dude, you should delete that picture," Jungkook says for the billionth time.
"No can do," you tell him. "I'm sending it to Yoongi."
"To spite him?"
"Duh."
"Aren't you helping him by telling him his girlfriend is a cheater?" Jungkook challenges.
You squint. "You're actually right, Kook. Then I won't tell him."
"Isn't that a little bit too mean?"
"What??"
"I mean, they've been dating since eighth grade. It's been nearly two years, right?" Jungkook points out. "I think Yoongi deserves to know."
"Don't you dare!" you gasp.
"Sorry, Y/N," Jungkook shrugs. "It's just the right thing to do."
Two days later, Gayoung comes to school wearing not the school uniform but a short skirt and tight shirt. Her arm slings around Jimin, her apparent new boyfriend. Yoongi is nowhere to be seen.
Rumor travels around fast. And they're all accurate for the most part.
But it's not very satisfying to see Yoongi missing from all the action. The whole school day, you wonder where the fuck the boy is. Maybe he's crying his guts out. You've never experienced heartbreak before, so you're not sure if you have the right to say Yoongi necessarily deserves it. You can say though, that he had it coming. After all, all those years he teased you, he hadn't felt a single bit of remorse.
Sucks for him.
It's dark by the time you begin to walk home from school. You'd stayed late to brush up on your horrible chemistry skills so you wouldn't completely fail the final test. On the walk back, you notice the familiar playground. You'd grown up with that thing. But it's been a while since you've cared enough to stare at it.
Usually, the rusty old playground is empty. But today, a figure sits in the shadows. More specifically on the seesaw.
It brings back memories. That had been the same seesaw that had started your rivalry with Min Yoongi. And someone's sitting on it.
You squint, your curiosity getting the better of you as you creep towards the figure. Oh god. Once you see the outline of the person, you know this isn't going to be a very fun experience. Ew, you think. Gross.
But that's until it occurs to you that the person is crying.
Holding your breath, you walk closer to the crying boy. He's shaking, hands covering his face. The other side of the seesaw is up in the air.
He's crying about Gayoung, you realize.
You breathe out. "Need someone to sit down to fling you out again?"
Yoongi jumps. He hiccups. Then he quickly wipes away the tears streaming down his face. "Shut up."
You grin, sitting down on the other side of the seesaw. And this time, neither of you fling off. It is completely balanced.
"What are you doing here?" Yoongi croaks when he realizes you're not going to be leaving any time soon. He sniffles, but for the most part, he hides the fact that he'd been crying very expertly.
"I dunno." You shrug. "What are you doing here?" When there's a pause, you add, "I didn't see you in school."
"Oh, didn't know you cared."
"I don't."
"Figured."
"Did you break up with Gayoung?"
Yoongi laughs scornfully. "No. She broke up with me."
"Yikes, really?"
"What is your deal, Y/N?" Yoongi sighs. "Are you going to laugh in my face? Tell me I deserve this?"
"Not anymore..." you grumble. "Because now there's no element of surprise."
Yoongi rolls his eyes. "I reckon you spread the rumor?"
"...The rumor?"
"Yeah, the fucking rumor!" Yoongi shouts, throwing up his hands. "You're the one who told everyone Gayoung was cheating on me!"
"Woah, there! I didn't say anything about it!" you yell. "It's not my fault your ex decided to hook up with Jimin!"
"What??"
"Here! I have the fucking receipts!" You whip out your phone, aggressively swiping through your photos before landing on the exact one you were looking for. When you show Yoongi, his eyes turn wide but his posture deflates. He looks defeated.
"She actually cheated...?"
The way he says it with wide eyes and a slumped attitude makes you feel a tiny bit of pity. But the habit of being mean to Yoongi sticks.
"I'm not even surprised."
Yoongi glares at you.
"I mean," you say with an innocent shrug, "she's been eyeing other guys since you started dating her."
"I know..."
You are not about to show sympathy to Min Yoongi. You are not going to let down your guard. You are going to stay cold and emotionless—
"I'm... uh... I... er, I guess I'm sorry."
Yoongi lifts an eyebrow. "Why are you sorry?"
"Well, it just seemed like you really liked her—"
"Nah."
"Oh?"
"This is going to sound very stupid."
"Try me." You grin. "In my eyes, you always sound stupid. Remember? I got in trouble for calling you stupid in kindergarten."
Yoongi rolls his eyes. "How could I forget?" He grips the seesaw handles. "I don't think I've ever really liked Gayoung."
"Damn, this is tea," you gasp. "Why bother dating her for so long, then?"
"Ha!" Yoongi laughs. "Good question, Y/N. I don't know," he says sarcastically. "I was probably trying to piss you off. Didn't think it'd last that long."
"Oh??" You raise your eyebrows. "But didn't I just see you cry over Gayoung?"
"Er—"
You definitely caught him in a lie. Though it's dark, you can imagine Yoongi flushing a bright shade of pink—he does that when he's guilty. Not that you cared enough to notice over the years.
"It's okay she's with Jimin now. Not your problem."
"Is this your half-assed attempt of trying to solace me?"
"No?" You make a face. "Why on earth would you think I'm trying to solace you, Yoongi? You called me fat in first grade."
"I see you still hold grudges."
"Oh, that's really my only talent," you snort.
"Aren't you a really good planner?"
"Me?" Is this a compliment you hear?—and from the Min Yoongi?
"Yeah, you're going to plan the graduation ceremony, right? They hand-picked you from the student council, didn't they?"
"Well, uh, yeah." You raise your eyebrows in both surprise and suspicion. "Didn't think you'd care."
"I don't."
Of course.
"Okay, fine by me."
"Why are you even here again?"
You pause. Actually, why are you here? You could've just simply walked away and never had this conversation with Yoongi. But you'd stopped. And now you're talking with him. You answer him truthfully. "I really have no idea."
Another pause.
"Are you gonna ask me to leave?"
"... No."
"Oh." You cock your head. "Okay."
The two of you stare at each other. A staring game commences.
But Yoongi blinks first, claiming you the victor of the little contest. "You can stay if you want."
You scoff. "Excuse me, I didn't know I needed your permission."
Yoongi throws his hands up in the air. "Do you always have to fucking pick a fight?"
"You're the one who starts them!"
"I didn't even say anything mildly rude."
Okay, he might kind of have a point. Maybe all those years of hating him have ingrained permanent hatred in your head, so whatever comes out of Yoongi's mouth seems like an insult that you have to respond to with equal rudeness by reflex.
"Where did we even go wrong?" you sigh, rubbing your forehead.
Yoongi snorts. "Literally right here. On this seesaw."
"You're right," you laugh. This is probably the first time you and Yoongi have agreed on something; it's a foreign feeling that doesn't quite settle right in your stomach.
"Remember when Jimin had a crush on you?"
"Oh stop—" Just one single sentence brings back so many memories.
"Now he's downgraded to girls like Gayoung," Yoongi snorts.
"Oh?" A wide smile stretches across your lips. "Are you saying I'm an upgrade compared to that vile girl?"
"When you put it that way, I'm not so sure."
In any other circumstance, you'd think Yoongi's attacking you again, putting up another unnecessary fight. But right now, it's obvious he's just teasing you.
"Let's face it, Yoongi. I'm better than your ex, aren't I?" you tease right back.
"Barely," he grumbles, but he mumbles under his breath, "but yes."
Thankfully, your owl ears pick up the last part and you grin haughtily. "That's all I needed to hear." Just by habit, you glance down at your watch, frowning when it reads a little past 10 p.m. You're definitely behind schedule right now. Strangely, though, it's kind of worth it, talking to your self-proclaimed nemesis without ripping each other apart with moderately hurtful words.
Yoongi takes notice of you checking the time. Always the same, he thinks. He can't remember the last time he saw you without a watch.
"Anyways... it's getting kind of late..." you say. But you're careful not to stand up from the seesaw—just in case you'll accidentally fling Yoongi off again.
Yoongi nods in agreement. "Yeah." But what he hears next is beyond what he would've ever thought would come out of your mouth next.
"Wanna get some cup ramen? I know a good convenience store nearby."
"With me??" The words slip out of Yoongi's mouth before he can maintain his stoic, chilled composure.
"Why not?" You shrug. "Maybe tonight's the night we can finally stop fighting and act civil for once."
"I am getting tired of the back and forth bickering," Yoongi admits. "Not a bad idea, Y/N."
"I come up with genius ideas once in a while." You flip your hair back and grin. "We just can't stay out before 12 because I need to plan my friend's birthday party before 1."
"I'll get you home by then."
"You're going to walk me home? How boyfriendly."
"It's a habit," Yoongi grumbles.
"A good habit. Keep it up, Min," you laugh. "Then you'll get a new girl in no time."
The two of you count to three before carefully getting off the seesaw together. There are no accidents this time. Everything seems... balanced.
The most what the fuck moment in your life comes when you wake up one morning and realize the person you text and hang out the most is, indeed, Yoongi. Months ago, the thought of him made your blood boil. Now, he's just a friend—a very close friend, too.
Entering eleventh grade with Yoongi by your side is weird. Every other school year, the two of you tried to stay away from each other as much as possible. Yet this year, it's the complete opposite. The two of you solace each other. Even if that involves heavy teasing and harsh verbal exchanges.
"You idiot!" Yoongi shrieks. "And you just let her get away with it?"
"Why yes, why yes I did!" you scream in your shrill voice that makes Yoongi almost flinch back. "What was I supposed to do? Yell at her and tell her I deserved to be class president and not her? Tell her to her face that she cheated the votes?"
"Yes?!"
"Well, I didn't have the guts!"
"Why do you always run away from your fucking problems?"
Yoongi's words pierce through your heart and suck up your anger, replacing it with regret. He’s right though. When something doesn't go the way you planned, you have a habit of ditching. You're afraid of the consequences that will follow when you freestyle everything. And Yoongi knows this.
"I-I... I just... It's easier," you sigh, slumping over your desk seat. "What else am I supposed to do?"
"Fight back maybe?" Yoongi's tone is softer after he sees you become dispirited. "I mean, hey, you win some, you lose some."
"I know... I just feel like I'm always losing these days."
"It's okay," Yoongi says. His big hands awkwardly pat at your back. And as funny as it is that he's attempting to comfort you, you're actually well comforted. "Doesn't matter whether you win or lose. What matters is the experience."
"Wise words."
"Well, I'm a wise person." Yoongi gives you a shit-eating grin.
"Oh god."
Sometimes, Yoongi's the one who breaks down, though it's not as often as you do. But once the storm comes, it's hard to make it leave.
"Please don't talk to me right now."
"But Yoongi," you plead, knocking on the door to his room. "I had to practically beg your parents to let me in!" you whisper angrily. "Come on, open the damn door!"
"I don't want to talk about it."
"Do you want me to break the door down??"
Silence follows and a small click indicates that the locked door is now open. You carefully turn the knob and push. Yoongi faces you immediately and the way his eyes are red and his cheeks are wet is indicative of a beforehand hysterical crying session.
"Oh, Yoongi..."
"I said I don't want to talk about it," he mutters. But you know he's just saying that because talking about it will make him cry again. You know him too well.
You pull him into a hug. "Maybe music isn't for you," you say. "It's okay if you failed that path. There are many more to take."
He's silent, squeezing you tightly. But you don't mind the silence at all. It's more peaceful that way, and you know he's actually listening to you when he's not talking.
"You're good at writing aren't you?" you whisper, patting his back. "Maybe that's your path. And if it isn't, so what? Poke at every pathway until you find one that's just right for you."
It's advice for yourself as well. Yoongi's upset that he was rejected from a music audition he was preparing to pass for years; he knew he wanted to pursue music and he did it, though it might not have been very successful. You, on the other hand, have no idea what you want to do in the future.
"I guess we both have to start on new paths now, right?"
By twelfth grade, you and Yoongi are beginning to bicker like a married couple. At least, that's what Jungkook says.
"For the last time, we do not sound married!"
Jungkook rests his head on the palm of his hand. "Sure. Sure."
"The thought of even being romantically interested in Y/N gives me goosebumps," Yoongi snorts.
"But the good kind of goosebumps if you know what I'm talking about," Jungkook says. He wiggles his eyebrows in such a suggestive way that you mock vomit.
"Okay, gross," you groan. "The day I catch feelings for Yoongi is the day the whole world will end."
"Um, right back at you," Yoongi frowns. "Don't worry," he says, giving you a cocky grin. "I'm very repulsive. You'll never catch feelings for me."
"We'll see about that," Jungkook snickers.
Every year, Yoongi writes you a birthday letter. Even now, in college, he manages to find time to make the same effort he's made for the past two years. Every year, he somehow makes you cry with his elaborate words. And every year, Yoongi films it because he's a little shit.
This year though, the tone of the letter is much, much sweeter than you expected. Almost as if it's a love serenade and not a platonic letter to your best friend. The writing is elaborately flourished and fluffed up to the point it sounds like a love poem. And you swear Yoongi spritzed perfume on the envelope because the letter smells (shockingly) amazing. The message itself doesn't make you cry. Instead, after you finish reading it, you stare up at Yoongi's camera in shock, jaw dropped open but no words coming out of your mouth. Yoongi seems to like that reaction a lot, and he even zooms up on your dumbstruck face to make fun of it later.
He'd written ten things he loves about you. And it drove you crazy that you didn't know whether it was platonic or romantic.
Love, Yoongi. He'd signed the letter. Not the usual, From your bestest motherfucking greatest friend, Yoongi.
What the fuck did 'Love, Yoongi' even mean??
And it happens so that the two of you fight about it later on.
"This year's birthday video is the best one yet," Yoongi laughs as he tries to turn the camera around to show you the screen.
You jerk away, frowning. "That is not funny."
"Why? Didn't like my letter this year?" He's teasing you but you're annoyed.
"It was different."
"A good different?" Yoongi nudges your shoulder, a smug smirk plastered on his lips.
"Literally, please, stop. Before I wipe that smirk off your face."
"Okay, okay," Yoongi sighs, raising up his hands in defense. "I bet you're just salty you can't name ten things you love about me."
"You're right, right now, I can name zero things," you scoff.
"Liar. You wouldn't have stuck by my side for this long if you didn't love me."
The fact that he's right makes it more irritating.
"Fine. One. You're an asshole—"
"Come on, is that really a reason?" Yoongi laughs. "This isn't ten things you hate about me, you know."
"Hear me out. You're a certain species of asshole that I find slightly more bearable than any other asshole," you say. "I think you're a tolerable asshole. It's a compliment."
"Thanks?"
"Two. You're an idiot—"
"Is this how the rest of the reasons gonna go?" Yoongi scoffs incredulously. "My letter was heartfelt at least!"
"No, but you're a bearable idiot. The kind that irks your strings just enough to make you pissed but not enough to make you explode. No idiot is tolerable but at least once in a million years you give good advice." You shrug as Yoongi shakes his head in denial.
"I always give good advice."
You roll your eyes. "Three. You're not very good looking—"
"I shouldn't even have asked," Yoongi grumbles. "Why did I fucking bother?"
"No, but you're not ugly. Isn't that good news?" you giggle as Yoongi just shakes his head at you. "It's perfect! That way, you attract people with your personality and not your looks! It's a compliment," you add when Yoongi glares at you.
"Whatever," he says.
"Four!" you say triumphantly. "You are drama-free. Except with me. But I'm an exception because I'm special."
"You got that right," Yoongi mutters underneath his breath. "What about five?" Compared to a minute ago, he looks more interested in your list now.
"Five? Well, you're genuine," you say nodding your head. "You wouldn't let me walk around with an eyelash on my face or spinach stuck between my teeth."
"Yeah 'cause you'd embarrass me too because you'd be by my side," Yoongi protests.
"I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear that."
"Fine. Six?"
"Six... hm..." you hum. "You have pretty eyes."
Yoongi laughs out loud. "Thanks, I guess."
"Seven... let's see... hm..." You rub your chin thoughtfully. "Well, you put the toilet seat down for me."
"My mother didn't raise a hooligan."
"I actually agree with you on that one," you say, laughing. "For eight, I want to just say you're a good friend."
"You stole my number 8 on my letter to you!"
"Yoongi, you should just be glad I even repeated it back to you," you giggle. "Wanna hear nine before I forget?"
Your friend sighs but he nods.
"You're a very good writer. And I'm not just saying that to boost your already enormous ego or anything, but I genuinely think you can write," you say. "And I love that because then I get these good ass letters on special occasions. It's weird how you can choose each word so carefully that all of the meanings fit in this gigantic well-flowing story. And you'd think you'd use all these hard vocabulary words to throw me off, but your writing's easy to read and comprehend. It makes it more impactful." You quirk your brow at your friend who finally looks satisfied. "Is that enough?"
"Yes, now that's more like it!" Yoongi grins. "Butter up my ego a bit more, won't you?"
"Can't. I don't have a number ten for you." You shrug. "Sorry."
"C'mon, you can only think of nine reasons why you love me?" Yoongi leans into you, poking your cheek. "I thought of eleven but I had to take one off. This isn't very fair."
"Oh? What was the eleventh?"
"It was more of a joke so you don't need to know."
"Excuse me? I love jokes—even though I don't take them very well."
"Yeah, well, I especially don't want you to take this a bad way," Yoongi says.
"Was it something mean about me??"
"Kind of."
You frown, scrunching your nose. "Try me."
Yoongi shrugs. "Fine, then. I called you oblivious. Happy?"
You lean back from your friend, giving him a disgraceful look. "Me? Oblivious? First of all, no. And second of all, why would you love that about me?"
"Oh, I don't know, because you're so oblivious you can't even tell that I like you??"
One look at Yoongi and you can tell he's dead serious. "Woah," you breathe. You want to ask him to repeat what he just said to see if you heard him correctly the first time. But he's already looking a little impatient at your delayed answer. So you gape at him, muttering a soft, "Like? As in...?" You can't finish the sentence.
"As in love?" Yoongi finishes for you. "Sure."
"Bro..."
Yoongi rolls his eyes. "I thought the letter made it obvious, Y/N."
"Well, I thought you were joking." You fidget with your hands. "Damn, Yoongi, now what the fuck am I supposed to say?"
"Do whatever you want with that information," he says, shrugging so nonchalantly that you wonder if this man even has feelings.
"Broo..."
"And if that means you're gonna keep saying 'bro,' then I guess that's fine too." He gives you a shit-eating grin.
"No, it's just that... wow. Since when??"
"Like, a year ago? Bit after Jungkook called us a married couple," Yoongi says. "But I'm so dead inside I hid it pretty fucking well. I kept thinking it'd go away too, but man, I still like you now, so I guess the feelings aren't going away anytime soon."
"But what are you proposing??" You run your hands through your hair. "That we go out??"
"Okay, you said it, not me."
You huff. It's weird. This dynamic you have with Yoongi. One moment you're bickering and the next, Yoongi's confessing his feelings for you. Strangely, though, you're not as turned off as you expected.
"One date."
Yoongi raises an eyebrow. "One date?"
"You can buy me dinner, and if it goes horribly, we're going right back to friends," you bargain. "In the case that it goes well, then, uh, you tell me."
Yoongi laughs. "Oh, I'll be the one to tell you, all right."
And unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on the way you look at it), he's right. Four days later, your relationship with Yoongi becomes official. It irks your strings that none of your friends are even the slightest bit surprised about your newfound romantic relationship with the man you'd known for way more than half of your life.
"We all saw it coming, Y/N," they tell you. "We're actually surprised you two didn't date sooner."
But Yoongi is actually a good boyfriend, so there are no regrets. Aside from the small bickering here and there (the married couple kind of arguing), your relationship with him is sound. And the fact that not much has changed in the way you treat each other since you began dating makes you wonder if you were technically in love with Yoongi this whole time but you were way too blinded by your stupid senses and habitual, platonic teasing that you didn't think you actually liked him romantically. It doesn't really matter now, though. Because you're with him anyway.
Yoongi's love language is quality time and coincidentally, so is yours. College becomes a blast. When you're not studying, you're with Yoongi and when you're not with Yoongi, you're 'studying,' but really thinking of your boyfriend.
Yoongi has a way of plaguing your mind. It's been like that since you were little, too.
Once out of college, things become more difficult. Marriage matures into a serious question that neither you nor Yoongi is ready for. So both of you put it off.
As soon as you secure a job as an event planner and Yoongi becomes a professional grant writer, the honeymoon phase of the relationship plummets to the ground.
For nearly eighteen years you were a victim of Yoongi's 'teasing.' His judgmental remarks. But there is a time and place to be a critique.
"Oh, come on, the food isn't even that bad, Yoongi. Just a little bland. That's it."
"There was a hair in my soup," your boyfriend complains. "I'm asking for another bowl."
"Okay, fine, but don't ask for the manager like last time."
"Last time, the waitress called me a tightwad!! What was I supposed to do?"
"Just let it slide? You yelled at her for bringing you bad food when she didn't even cook it! Can you please stop acting so above everybody?"
"Whatever." Yoongi sets down his silverware. "I'm gonna Uber home." He tosses you his credit card and it slides across the wooden table and stops right in front of your dish. "And I'm going to write a Yelp review of this shitty place."
"You're not a fucking entitled writer! Stop acting like one!" you call out to him as he turns his back to you and storms away.
You end up eating dinner at a restaurant by yourself. Yoongi's right, the place is shitty, and the food is bland, but it's not downright intolerable.
Often, these days, it feels like your relationship with Yoongi is spiraling downward. The two of you cannot seem to agree on anything. It reminds you when you'd hated him in your younger years. But you can't hate him now; you live with him.
He's unavoidable.
Usually, Yoongi drives. The car feels foreign to you only because you normally don't sit in the driver's seat. The short mixtape of songs Yoongi wrote and produced for you plays the moment you turn on the engine. He'd gifted that to you a few months ago, after one of your bigger fights. You let the soft serenades play as you drive home.
No matter how many times you and Yoongi fight, the two of you make it up to each other somehow. There is no fight without a resolution. Yoongi will be waiting for you when you get home.
And he is. He's waiting with a blueberry yogurt cake from Paris Baguette sitting on the kitchen island and a letter in his hand. A written apology. Because Yoongi thinks he conveys his feelings better in writing than with spoken words.
"I'm sorry for storming off..." he says almost shyly. The man is nearly twenty-five years old but he sounds and looks like a guilty child with his lips pulled out in a pout and his eyes glancing nervously at your face to see if you weren't going to yell at him. "I, uh... didn't write the Yelp review."
How can you stay mad at that?
"And I wrote you an apology..."
You walk closer to your boyfriend and hug him. "Thank you..."
"Yeah," he says. "And good news, the cake will be really flavorful compared to what you had for dinner."
You smile. "Good thinking."
After a storm, there is always a rainbow. When there is a down, there is an up. And vice versa.
"Can we please stop planning every single fucking second of our lives?" Yoongi says exasperatedly. He flings away the brochure you had handed him that detailed the week's trip to Hawaii down to the last minute. "We're going on vacation. This makes me feel like I'm going to a stupid summer camp."
"If we're going to Hawaii, we shouldn't just relax around in the hotel all day, Yoongi," you scoff, gathering the abandoned brochure and tugging it to your chest. "There's stuff to see on the islands. We need to try everything my friends did! Why would we even go to Hawaii if we're not going to do these fun activities?"
"Come on. 7 o'clock breakfast? 8 o'clock hiking up to the falls? 10 o'clock scuba diving in the ocean? 12 o'clock lunch at the top of a big ass hill that we have to climb up ourselves? 1 o'clock zip-lining meters in the air? 2 o'clock festival? I could go on, but isn't that too much? When can we breathe?" Yoongi shakes his head. "No way. And all of that's just in one day. And the second day is even worse. Y/N, I want to go there to rest."
"If you wanted to rest, then you can do it at home," you argue. "Why go to Hawaii to rest?"
"There are different types of resting," Yoongi sighs. "What's a better way to fall asleep than in front of the ocean? We get to relax in a hotel, which means we won't have to make our beds or cook our meals or even do the dishes. That's relaxing for me."
"Well, it's not relaxing enough for me."
"Come on, Y/N. We went to Banff and you planned every single second of the trip there. I thought it was miserable. Can we please relax just once? For literally one trip?"
"But I already booked everything..."
Yoongi curses. "Why are you always four steps ahead of everything? It's unnecessary!"
"Maybe I'm not four steps ahead and you're just four steps behind!"
"Oh, so you're telling me that everyone else in the world plans their days down to the last second." Yoongi rolls his eyes. "Bullshit, Y/N."
"It's not my fault you're so—so, fucking lazy!"
"I'm not lazy!" Yoongi's eyes flash as he slams the dinner table. "You're just too high maintenance! Fucking nobody can keep up with you!" Before you can react or even yell back, he pushes his chair away and stands up, stomping away in a fury. You can hear him enter his study. There's that familiar door slam again. And the click of the lock means you won't be getting in that room anytime soon.
You're left by yourself, clutching the Hawaii brochure to your chest. A little angry at yourself but a lot madder at your boyfriend. With a bitter scream, you toss the brochure in the trash and curl up in a ball at the side of the couch.
But the thing about you and Yoongi is that with time and space, you recognize each other's perspectives. The rest is history.
Three hours just crying out your pent-up anger gets the irritation out of your system. By the time you're done though, you're a little hungry and guilty. You make a few phone calls and switch things around.
"Hey." You knock on the door of Yoongi's study. You're too afraid to turn the knob yourself. "I know you're in there."
No answer.
"I canceled the excessive activities..." you whisper against the door. "We can plan the trip together... I mean, better yet, we don't even have to plan anything at all... We can be..."—it pains you to say but—"spontaneous."
"Go away. I'm trying to work."
Sometimes Yoongi takes a bit longer than you to come around.
But by dinnertime, he's crept out of his study and has already ordered takeout from your favorite restaurant. The steaming pile of white rice and perfect side dishes lie on the dinner table, waiting for you. He waits for you too.
"I got a new client," he says, looking down at his hands. "And I got your favorite food." You notice that he's holding the Hawaii brochure you'd thrown away. It's a little wet on the sides. Maybe because Yoongi had to wipe off the remnants of the leftovers in the trash that had stuck onto the paper. Your boyfriend finally looks up at you. Shyly. Almost cautiously. "Wanna compromise?"
"Compromise?"
"We plan half of the trip and wing the rest of it," he offers. Yoongi slides you the brochure. "See, so I was thinking..."
You've always hated roller coasters. They are almost always unpredictable with head-jerking twists and turns that bring you closer to vomiting the contents of your stomach rather than pure bliss. There are one too many ups and downs.
Yoongi likes to joke that your relationship with him is a roller coaster. Only because there are too many dips that rocket up to the sky only to plummet down again. You disagree. Because, eventually, no matter how shitty the ride is, roller coasters do end. Your relationship with Yoongi is not over.
You like to compare your relationship with Yoongi like the ocean waves. But during a tsunami. The ups are great; the towering waves give you a beautiful vantage point. And it's all fun and games until the waves crash down on everything you once loved, destroying them. And the process repeats so much that in the end, there is nothing left.
That's what you feel now. Empty.
Alone in the bed with Yoongi downstairs and nowhere to be seen near you.
After a while, even the highs of the relationship makes you feel numb. The lows wreck you past your breaking point. It takes more time to find resolutions—the fights go on for longer than days, even weeks.
When you were younger, fighting with Yoongi was irritating at most. Now, they leave you sobbing and drinking alone in the corner of the bathroom. But it's so late in the game.
You've known Yoongi for over eighteen years of your life, since kindergarten. You keep telling yourself that he's the only one in the world who could understand you; and you're the only one in the world who can understand him. But other than that, you can't find another reason why you're with him.
Sometimes, you listen back to the mixtape he made you years ago. The lyrics don't apply to you now. And this year, for your birthday, he half-assed a letter for you last-minutely because he was 'busy.' Busy drinking with his friends the night before. You've stopped planning your dates for months.
Actually, when was the last time you went on a date with him?
You can't recall.
Maybe the back and forth arguing you and Yoongi had gone through in the majority of your relationship was a sign—a bad sign. If only you hadn't met him on the seesaw that day. Then maybe none of this would've happened.
You might be dating someone you have things in common with. Maybe someone you don't argue with as much.
Falling asleep with tears in your eyes that keep the pillow wet until morning is an occurrence that you're too familiar with. It is an occurrence you want to stop. When Yoongi isn't downstairs by morning, you're thrown into further misery. He usually works from home... He must be really angry to leave without saying anything.
You eat breakfast by yourself. Lunch consists of ramen. And dinner... Yoongi's still not home so you skip the meal altogether.
By 9 p.m., you look at your phone. You don't want to be the first person to break—the first person to apologize—but you worry. Will he hang up on you? Tell you to go away? The possibilities seem endless.
So much thinking hurts your head. Some fresh air might do the trick. Before you know it, you're wandering around a familiar rusty playground again. It brings back childhood memories. When your hand trails across the paint-chipped monkey bars, you're brought back to when you were only six years old. The towering obstacle had looked so big when you were little. Now, you could easily cross the bars by simply walking.
It's strange to see the once-bustling playground be completely empty and in the dark. You hear that they're going to tear down this place to construct a little convenience store so no one must've visited this playground in a very long time. You'll miss it when it's gone. You had a lot of fun around here.
Just as that thought passes through your head, your eye catches sight of the seesaw.
Ah, the start of everything.
Slowly, you walk towards it. Each step makes your feet sink further in the smoothed over gravel but you manage to sit at the very edge of the seesaw. Immediately, the other side flings up in the air. It reminds you of when you flung Yoongi in the air. A pretty funny memory. But not right now. Thinking about Yoongi now hurts.
You hate it when you start to contemplate the worst-case scenario. A breakup. Moving out. Stress. Tears.
You run your fingers across the rusty handle of the seesaw. Hopefully, things don't come to that. But how much longer can you handle the arguments? They seem to be elongating as time passes. What if one day, the argument lasts a month? Several months? A year?
If there is one thing in your life that you strive to achieve, it's predictability. With Yoongi, there is none of that. He makes last-minute plans out of nowhere and doesn't tell you until the last second. Then you have to go on a frenzy to reschedule everything. It is a cycle that you've become sick of. And he's sick of you planning everything.
That has been the issue of the last ten fights.
The same issue.
And it's unfixable.
You and Yoongi are rock bottom on the very floor of the Mariana Trench. The back and forth game of banter has turned into something more serious, and it just isn't as light-hearted and funny anymore.
"Hey."
You nearly fall off the seesaw at the sound of Yoongi's voice. He's got his hands shoved in his pockets and he looks like he was awake for more than 24 hours.
"H-Hey," you say.
"The seesaw, huh?"
"Yeah." You nod. "The seesaw."
Yoongi smiles but it's not a very happy one. Even now, you don't think either one of you wants to apologize for the fight.
"I've been thinking," Yoongi sighs. He doesn't spare you another glance before he sits on the other side of the seesaw. You're suddenly jerked up in the air. There used to be a balance but it seems like Yoongi's gained some weight—or you've lost a lot. "Remember when I said our relationship is like a rollercoaster?"
"And I said I disagreed."
"Right." Yoongi sighs. "I take that back. We're not like a rollercoaster. We're in a game."
"A game?"
Yoongi gestures at the seesaw. "This is our game."
"...The seesaw?" You raise an eyebrow at the man but Yoongi doesn't budge.
"Yes. Look." Yoongi pushes off the gravel with his feet, putting himself in the air while sinking you to the ground. "And when you push..." Following his words, you launch yourself back in the air. Yoongi looks up at you as he sighs. "We're always on opposite sides, opposite places."
"Even when we try to balance," he continues, trying to lift his body to bring you down to the same level as him, "we fail." He ends up higher than you now and you look up at him.
"Some game this is..." you mutter.
"It's a game of ups and downs," Yoongi tells you. "It's tiring, isn't it?"
"Of course it is."
"And like all games... there is an end."
You raise both eyebrows. "Oh."
"From day one, you know... we weren't really supposed to get along," Yoongi says. "But somehow seeing each other every day, bickering with each other... all of that let us be in closer proximity with each other. And then we thought we were meant to be."
"You're analyzing our relationship?" you scoff.
"Don't act like you haven't done the same, Y/N."
You're silent.
"It doesn't matter whether we love each other at this point, Y/N... Does it? Love or not, I don't think I can live like this."
It's ridiculous. You're having a grown-up discussion possibly leading to a breakup on a fucking seesaw of all places.
"You want to separate?" Your voice comes out smaller than you expected. When it becomes a reality, it's much harder to digest.
"You've been thinking about it too, right?" Yoongi sighs. "I mean, I heard you call your mom the other day. And it didn't sound too good."
Guilty. "Well, yeah, I've been thinking about it... Just... I just didn't think it'd become a reality so soon." And you always thought you would have initiated the breakup, not the other way around.
"Yeah... I felt bad you always took initiative with things so I decided to save you the stress and do it myself."
"Wow. Thanks." You shake your head. "Real thoughtful."
"Right?" Yoongi grins. "I don't think a lot will change if we break up. We've always hated each other a little."
You let out a wry laugh. "I'll never forgive you for calling me fat."
"And I'll never forgive you for calling me stupid."
"Looks like we're even."
"Yeah, for once." Yoongi shrugs. "I guess we can be platonic roommates until I find another apartment."
"Sounds good to me." You ignore the tears welling up in your eyes as you try to smile. "Let's get off this seesaw to seal the deal then."
"The end of the game." Yoongi's voice shakes just enough for you to know he's crying.
And as the two of you walk back to your shared apartment with tears streaming down your faces, you realize you wouldn't have it any other way. A breakup any later would be regretful—even wasteful of time. A breakup any earlier would've left you to separate forever. A breakup now is perfect.
You're acquainted enough to still possibly be friends. But not bound by marriage to make the procedure worse and more complicated.
Of course, you love Yoongi. But sometimes, you love the wrong people—the people you don't belong with, the people who won't make you happy. You're just glad you didn't run away in the beginning. Yoongi taught you a difficult rivalry, a difficult friendship, a difficult relationship. But you don't always have to go the hard way.
When a relationship becomes like a game—repetitive with the addition of wins and losses—that's when you know you can stop.
You'll be on the easy route now and find someone who is as crazy about planning as you.
You look up at Yoongi. His cheeks are wet with tears but he doesn't necessarily look sad. Instead, he looks hopeful. Like he'll find somebody who can appreciate his love for leaving sarcastic Yelp reviews or somebody who loves spontaneity as much as he does.
And when he finds that special somebody, you'll be happy for Yoongi. But, of course, not before you tease the living shit out of him first.
—masterpost
—masterlist
#ficswithluv#btswritersnet#btswriterscollective#bangtanfairygarden#btswritingcafe#yoongi#min yoongi#yoongi imagine#yoongi fanfic#yoongi fanfiction#bts#bts fanfiction#propinquity#okay let's pretend i totally posted this fic last friday#like halfway thru this week#i remembered i never posted on friday omg clown#🤡🤡 i don't even think i've been on social media#school rlly said no❤️
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Comm Final
Shameless is a show which, according to Nylon Magazine, has been “has been lauded for its depiction of what it means to be lower-class in America, from the perspective of a white Midwestern family. The show has sparked conversations about race, poverty, class, queerness, sex, and addiction, and it’s easily become one of the most important shows on TV” (Ashe). The show has a large cast of characters, with Frank Gallagher as the father of 6 children, with a large supporting cast that comes in and out of the fold as needed to tell the story. There are multiple instances of the aforementioned issues that come with race, poverty, and queerness, and it is presented in a realistic yet engaging way that makes audiences root for the Gallagher family. Flood Magazine claims that “its depiction of the struggling class in Chicago is a most honest and accurate dissertation of urban abjection in popular culture. The show is not for the faint of heart. It is an unapologetic discussion of urban poverty in America—raw, honest, and dark, employing humor to offset the bleakness” (Spry). An analysis of the gender & sexuality topics that come up in Shameless is needed to appreciate not only how rare it is for this to be seen in media, but also how well it is handled in Shameless.
Shameless offers a unique look at the way that sexuality is extremely accepted from the main cast of characters and only relies on a few instances of bigotry coming into play for the storyline to take place. These instances occur mostly from religious institutions acting in hatred against the LGBTQ+ community and have the churches act as the bad guy for the show’s purpose. The fact that Showtime allows the show to have created such dialogue shows how far programming has come over the last 50 years. “At its inception, television rarely presented sexual themes […]. One theme that has been especially ignored is the portrayal of sexual issues related to gay, lesbian, and bisexual individuals. Despite the lifting of some longstanding taboos over the last several decades, television programming has been called ‘compulsory heterosexual’, and depictions of the sexual issues associated with nonheterosexuals may remain relatively rare (Fisher, et al.).
The show has homosexuals in the form of Ian Gallagher and Mickey Milkovich, the sexually fluid in the case of one of Ian’s boyfriends, and eventually Debbie Gallagher, who started as a youngster in the show, developed from a curious teenager to a confident Bisexual, with many more of the supporting cast belonging to the LGBTQ+. Television came from a point where “there was not a single representation of a gay character. […] One teen drama scene, for example, showed two male characters jumping apart embarrassed after being ‘caught’ practicing dancing together (Batchelor).
What is especially refreshing from Shameless is how sexuality is only seen as a character trait that someone has but does not take over their personality. There are some episodes where the main topic might be someone’s sexuality, with Debbie, in particular, having a couple of episodes to cover her sexuality arc, but in a show, with now 11 seasons, a couple of episodes of delving into the topic does not cover the depth of these characters. An almost running gag that we see is how Mickey is a bottom despite coming off as aggressive and very manly, but he does not flaunt it but is also not embarrassed by it, he just claims to like what he likes. This concept of a top or a bottom in the LBTGQ+ community is something that I am not going to pretend to be an expert on, but how Mickey does not care what anyone thinks is something you could very easily see develop as a plot point in a show of lesser quality.
Mickey comes from a very damaged home life to the point where his father hired a prostitute for Mickey to engage in sex to set him straight, hindering Mickey’s self-acceptance of his sexuality. He pretended to be not cared about Ian because of this, even going so far as to have sex with women and even raising the child he has with the prostitute. However, Mickey develops into a person who comes out to everyone he knows at a bar he frequents for Ian, and even exchanging blows with his father to the point that police come, who end up releasing Mickey as one of the officers was gay himself. The way in which Mickey comes out is not only a great moment on its own, but the fact that he did it for Ian shows that he is much more complicated than someone who is just gay.
The realistic portrayal of Trans people is something that has been an issue in the past when it came to social media. Even if it did come up, it could often come up in a negative light. An example of this is in It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, where an attractive woman has negative connotations associated with her simply because they are Trans. Even on a smaller scale, media genders certain things, such as pink, barbies, and cooking being much more feminine, and the color blue, trucks, and wrestling often being associated with manliness. The example of gendering things does not have much to do about Trans, but it still plays a role in the way gender affects much more than one would think.
In recent times, there has been an “increase in the TGD population, estimated to include up to 1% of the U.S. population, is likely due to an increase in the raw population of individuals who identify openly as TGD […] Coinciding with this rise, there has been an increase of TGD representation in media, through celebrities like Caitlyn Jenner, supporting characters in films and television, and shows and movies where TGD characters and their journeys are the central theme. While this increased representation is positive on its surface, it is by no means without flaws and TGD persons are still wildly underrepresented in the media” (Mocarski).
Gender has evolved in Shameless from something that was used as almost a one-off joke at the beginning of the show to something that goes more in-depth with an introduction of a recurring character in the case of Trevor, a boyfriend of Ian Gallagher. At first, Molly, a child that Lip Gallagher ends up helping when their mom kills herself is thought to be a girl, as they are wearing dresses and have long hair. However, it is eventually revealed that the girl turns out to have a penis, and as Molly has a small role, it is only addressed humorously by having Fiona Gallagher eventually tell Molly that they were a boy.
Around 5 seasons later, Trevor was introduced to the show and eventually became Ian’s boyfriend. Trevor’s gender played a key role in the shows’ story as Ian became more acclimated to his friends who were much savvier when it came to the LGBTQ+ world, as well as even having different sexual interactions that Ian is used to. The pair got into an argument about who would be a top and a bottom with Trevor having issues with being a bottom since he thought Ian assumed it was that case since Trevor now identifies as male. It turned out that they both just happened to top, and the pair laughed it off as it had nothing to do with gender at all. This gives hope to the future of Trans representation in the media, as Trevor goes on to become a much more developed person outside of just being Trans, but the plot points that do focus on his gender are done tastefully.
Gender and sexuality have come a long way in the real world, and the portrayal of it in Shameless is something that is not common, and on top of that, portrayed in a realistic and positive light. Having both main characters as well as those on the periphery be a part of the LGBTQ+ community doesn’t over or underemphasize the topic, and the way that the storyline takes place ensures that there are not any moments where a character is seen only as their sexuality or their gender. The beauty of the show itself is that these two topics barely scrape the surface of Shameless. There are many issues such as race, socioeconomic status, gentrification, even mass media, and cults encompassing some of the show’s storyline. Every time the show hits the mark and represents these issues in a realistic yet engaging way. As Nylon’s Stephanie Ashe says, “Shameless has taken a hyper-specific set of circumstances and found the universality of them. And they’ve managed to do it without ever mocking the subjects of their story. Treating them with the care they deserve helps us realize that they’re not so removed from our own experiences.”
Bibliography
Ashe, Stephanie. Nylon, 2017, www.nylon.com/articles/shameless-important-television-show-working-class-depiction.
Batchelor, S.A, Kitzinger, J. Burtney, E. “Representing young people's sexuality in the ‘youth’ media”, Health Education Research, Volume 19, Issue 6, December 2004, 669–676, https://doi.org/10.1093/her/cyg082
Fisher, Deborah A et al. “Gay, lesbian, and bisexual content on television: a quantitative analysis across two seasons.” Journal of homosexuality vol. 52,3-4 (2007), 167-88. doi:10.1300/J082v52n03_08
Mocarski, Richard et al. “The Rise of Transgender and Gender Diverse Representation in the Media: Impacts on the Population.” Communication, culture & critique vol. 12,3 (2019): 416-433. doi:10.1093/ccc/tcz031
Spry, Mike. “Poverty on Television: ‘Shameless’ and the American Dream.” Flood Magazine, 19 Dec. 2016, floodmagazine.com/42253/shameless-american-dream/.
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The Baby-Sitters Club Book #5: Dawn and the Impossible Three
He was already beginning to change when he “re-met” Mom, but now he’s a completely different father. He let Mary Anne get contact lenses to replace her reading glasses. He allows her to spend her baby-sitting money if she saves her allowance, and since he no longer buys her clothes, you should see what Mary Anne gets with her money. She doesn’t look like Claudia or Stacey, who wear these really wild outfits such as tight black pants and Day-Glo shirts, but, well, for instance, at that very moment as we walked across the Kishis’ lawn, Mary Anne had on her first sweatshirt and her first pair of jeans ever. She looked terrific!
Am I blind? Where did I miss a mention of Mary Anne wearing glasses? And reading glasses? Did she only wear them part time? Color me confused, friends.
Also: She’s wearing jeans. *soft gasp* JEANS. Mr. Spier, you are loosey goosey!
For people that don’t know what Day-Glo is, think SOLID. NEON. HIGHLIGHTER. These books were originally released in the late 80′s/early 90′s. It was a time of acid washed jeans, crimped hair, and BRIGHT. NEON. COLORS. EVERYWHERE. If you wore pink, it was Barbie Pink. Yellow was hazard construction sign yellow. Blues were in your god damn face with how blue they were.
I was still looking around when I heard footsteps on the stairs. I turned and saw an absolutely gorgeous young woman rushing toward us. She looked like a model. Honest. She was wearing a silk blouse, a sleek linen suit, brown heels, and gold jewelry — not too much, but enough so you noticed it. Her hair fell away from her face in chestnut curls and she smelled of a heavenly perfume.
Have you seen the memes of “looks put together/life is an absolute mess”? I feel for her, though. She went through a divorce and she is a giant mess. Dawn, you’re not her maid! Don’t clean her house, dangit!
I’m glad it was addressed so well in the Netflix series. Dawn’s mum slammed it DOWN.
The kids ran up the stairs to the playroom on the second floor. A few minutes later, they ran back down. Andrew was wearing a red cap and a blue jacket decorated with gold braid. Hannie was wearing a skirt that reached to the floor; large, sparkly high heels with no toes; a fur stole; and a hat with a veil. In one hand, she carried a pair of spectacles attached to a diamond-studded stick. Behind her, Karen was dressed as Mrs. Mysterious, all in black, including a black eye patch and a black fright wig.
Y’all... this is so cute. I love how extravagant the kids dress up in the game ‘Let’s All Come In’. I truly enjoy how Karen dives right into the “dark and mysterious and spooky” tropes. Why she is not constantly watching The Addams Family, I will never know. (Or maybe she does at her mom’s?!)
“What is it?” Stacey trotted over to me, looking as fabulous as always. She was wearing a simple pink T-shirt under a baggy jumpsuit with big pink and red flowers all over it. Her shiny hair bounced over her shoulders. I was wearing blue jean shorts and a white T-shirt that said GENIUS INSIDE. I looked ordinary next to Stacey.
One of my friends dresses like this description of Stacey. It’s a very loud color palette, however, it’s put together so nicely that the bright colors work so well! I’m not sure if a T-shirt works underneath a jumpsuit... but I suppose it works? It’s like the early 00′s where we wore small dresses on top of blue jeans and heels. It was an...interesting time.
“Oh,” I groaned. Jenny the brat. She lived right around the corner. “I wonder why we didn’t notice her earlier.” Jenny was the only kid in the backyard who appeared to be dressed for a wedding. She had on a pink pinafore over a spotless white dress, white tights, and pink Mary Janes. Her mother had braided her hair and tied pink ribbons at the ends.
This book is the only reason why I know what a pinafore is. Y’all laugh, but it’s true! I don’t know how I went all these years not knowing what a pinafore was... when I’ve worn them before. *facepalm*
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Check out this listing I just added to my Poshmark closet: Barbie 40th Anniversary 1999 Collector Edition Doll in Sealed Box.
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'One of the biggest weekends in Hollywood history delivered everything audiences hoped for and more. Barbie and Oppenheimer are both critical and box office hits. More importantly their combined force has reignited the public’s love affair with going to the movies.
But we know it’s not enough to simply enjoy each film for what it is. Only a fool would let themselves appreciate two distinct works of art on their own merits. I mean, they had the audacity to come out on the same day! That kind of confrontational release schedule, which was pretty common not that long ago, is basically begging very smart people to declare one a winner instead of celebrating that each is elevating the other while also lifting the entire medium and industry. And since we’re not idiots we’re pitting each film head-to-head in a scientific, totally objective, totally serious Barbenheimer showdown. And we’re doing that with categories that apply equally to both films.
Best Explosion
In a matchup this tough it’s always nice to start with a layup. Obviously this goes to the movie which features an explosion of neon-pink. Advantage: Barbie
Best Use of Color
This is another easy category to hand out. Only one is partially shot in black-and-white, making all of its scenes in color really stand out in comparison. A classic case of “less is more.” Advantage: Oppenheimer
Best Costumes
Barbie has great costumes, absolutely. But they’re mostly based on toys lots of people have purchased. That pre-existing template likely made it super easy to recreate countless extravagant, stunning, memorable looks. Meanwhile, Oppenheimer needed clothes covering a span of nearly 40 years, from 1924 to 1963. During that time men went from wearing dark suits and hats to slightly different dark suits and hats. And it’s not clear they even have cameras back then. Talk about a tough assignment! Advantage: Oppenheimer
Most Times Saying the Movie’s Title
People say “Barbie” a lot in Barbie, but they also say “Oppenheimer” a lot in Oppenheimer. We tried to count each instance but lost track of both after roughly 20 minutes, so this analysis is maybe a little less objective than we’d like. Considering people sometimes chant or call him “Oppy,” whereas no one ever calls her “Barb,” we feel good about which one is probably correct. Advantage: Barbie
Best Musical Number
Tough break for Oppenheimer. Despite being three hours long, director Christopher Nolan inexplicably didn’t find room for a single musical number. Will that cost the movie at the Oscars? It definitely won’t help. Meanwhile “ I’m Just Ken” will likely take home three or four Academy Awards on its own. Advantage: Barbie
Best Use of a Line From the Sacred Hindu Text the Bhagavad Gita
We swear this is true: nothing said in Barbie comes directly from the Bhagavad Gita. No, not even anything Weird Barbie says We can’t believe it either! Advantage: Oppenheimer
Second Best Use of a Line From the Sacred Hindu Text the Bhagavad Gita
More like “Now I am become repetitive, the repeater of words,” amirite? But a technical win is still a win, so… Advantage: Oppenheimer
Smartest Lead Character
Who adds a random “J” to the start of their name for no reason? Oppenheimer was literally no Einstein. Meanwhile, Stereotypical Barbie was busy saving her world with a genius plan while the “brilliant” scientist was busy blowing up his. Advantage: Barbie
Biggest Crybaby (In a Good Way)
Some of Barbie‘s best, most emotional, most important scenes feature its lead character crying. Advantage: Barbie
Biggest Crybaby (In a Bad Way)
How many people in history have had the sitting U.S. President call them a “crybaby” in the Oval Office? Gotta be a small list. Advantage: Oppenheimer
THE ULTIMATE BARBENHEIMER WINNER
Uh oh. Our thorough, all-encompassing categories—meticulously designed to fairly compare a heartfelt, lively comedy about an iconic toy that explores what it means to be a woman and a grand, somber biopic about one of the most consequential and complicated scientists in history—resulted in a final score of 5-5-1. You don’t need to be an astrophysicist to know that equals a tie. We haven’t been this disappointed since we found out the patriarchy isn’t just about horses. Better add one more category to break it.
Best Existential Crisis By a Main Character About How Their Life Hurt So Many People
Advantage: Push
Dang. Looks like there’s no clear “winner” in our big Barbenheimer showdown.
THE ULTIMATE BARBENHEIMER TIE
…Is it possible no one “won?” In fact, is it actually childish to evaluate art in a binary way that diminishes movies into arbitrary winners and losers? Should we instead focus on each film’s deep themes that get to the very nature of what it means to exist and how we help shape the world we live in? In fact, aren’t the real winners everyone who loves movies, because we got two excellent, star-studded original films by talented directors on the same day?
Yeah, maybe. But we’re going to go see both movies a few more times just to be sure.'
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