#AGHHHHH THIS HAS BEEN EATING AT ME FOR DAYS NOW | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

elysianeclipxe · 11 months

Note

a lonely bed is a cold bed is a really cute fic but what will happen to jay, if they broke up? will he be able to sleep by himself? just a thought maybe make a part 2 of the story hehe >.<

First of all, thank you, I appreciate the support 💕 Second, I can sense the angst and although I'm not a big angst person, I loveee the idea too much... So ask and you shall receive!! Have fun reading part 2 (⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠) btw, this hurt me so much emotionally sooo yay, but fr loved the request. It was pretty fun to write. Hope to see you and your ideas again soon, anon!

an empty bed is all I have now | enhypen jay

warnings: talk of nightmares, tears, jay not over y/n, just a lot of heartbreak pain

genre/au: A LOT of angst, fluff, ex bf!jay

word count: 1.1k

summary: it's been a couple months since things went wrong between you and jay, and he only hopes that you're handling the pain better than him

sidenote: this is a semi-requested part 2 of 'a lonely bed is a cold bed'. read part 1, for more context. enjoy reading lovelies <3

Heavy breathing could only be heard in the room. The shine of the moon is barely seen through the window. A bedroom that used to be filled with so much warmth and happiness now feels strange and cold. Who knew that you leaving could cause such a change in.. everything. You really made such an impact in his life and now that you're gone, it all feels different.

Sleep eludes Jay. He dreads the night. He dreads the fact that he has to lie in the same bed that you used to sleep in; and just try his best to sleep. But every night is the same. The same place, with the same routine, and the same nightmare that ends up washing all his efforts to rest down the drain. And it seems as though today was no different.

Jay clenches his hand over his chest and tries to pace his breathing, "calm down. It's not real, it's not real, it's not.. real." He harshly wipes away any tears that might've fallen and forces himself up and out of bed. "Maybe some food will get this off my mind," so off to the kitchen he goes. He rummages around in the fridge and takes out some milk, looks in the cupboards and gets some cookies. Classic.

Heh, cookies and milk. Her favourite go-to midnight snack. I remember she always had this right after waking up from her bad dreams

He sets his snack on the dining table and sits down with a thud. He doesn't eat though. He just watches the water droplets run down the side of the cup because of the condensation, a pool of water gathering at the base of the cup. "She'd probably tell me off again for not getting a coaster. I'll have to listen to her lecture again on 'furniture care'... Shit, I wanna hear her voice so bad, even if it's just her telling me off." He bitterly laughs and blinks away the tears that brim his eyes. "The milk's lukewarm now, haha gross."

The sight is sad and pitiful, even Jay would agree if he could see himself right now. A single ceiling light barely lit up the dining area he was in. Jay's figure lonely eating on one side of the table, head tilted down with a sullen look on his face.

He felt so empty. This house no longer felt like a home. Without you here beside him everything just felt unfamiliar. There was no one to join him for meals and ask for a bite of his food even if you both ate the same thing, you always claimed that his food was tastier. Nobody could greet him with the hugs and kisses he loved so much by the door anymore. He could no longer listen to you ramble about your thoughts when you inevitably stayed awake from your nightmares. He gets it now, your fear of sleeping after those dreams. He only hopes that you have someone to talk to about it, even if it's not him. Jay opens up his phone and scrolls down till he finds your name. He opens the messages between you two and stares at the last message you sent him.. 4 months ago.

Nothing... what did I expect? AGHHHHH OF COURSE SHE WOULDN'T TEXT YOU!! You're so stupid to think that she would

These days he wonders how you're doing. If you're getting some sleep or still having trouble with it. He begs whatever deity is up there that you're alright. He hopes that you're doing better than he is. Jay hated the present so much. He missed the past, the past that had you in it. Maybe that's why he often stayed awake. Besides those frustrating nightmares that he has, he stays awake waiting for the moment you would call or text him; telling him you need someone to talk to or someone to listen to you, as you get everything off your chest. Then you'd likely ask him things like his regrets from the past, his fears of the future, the things he wants to keep in the present. He loved.. no, loves that about you. How you're able to be so vulnerable with him and allow him to be vulnerable with you too. If only you could listen to him now, he'd tell you that he regrets not being selfish and keeping you by his side till now. He hated that he let you go so easily. Too thoughtful to hold you back and too in love with you to stand the idea that you would be unhappy here. It was for the best. So why, why can't he let it go? Why can't he let you go?

"Huh, what's-" he touches his lip and sees the blood that stains his finger red. Jay clenches his teeth and runs his fingers through his hair, pulling on it in frustration.

UGHH WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!! WHY AM I LIKE THIS TODAY?! GOD I JUST MISS HER SO FUCKING MUCH

"Forget it, nothing's gonna change. It's late, I should go back to bed. I have work later." He tosses his trash in the bin and places his cup in the sink, deciding that he'll clean it later. The male walks back to his bedroom and covers himself with the sheets. He shivers as he settles into the bed. It feels cold. Colder than before. What’s new? It’s not like he didn’t know that the bed has slowly felt colder these past few months. It will never be the same as before, nothing will, not even him. It’s time he faced the facts… You are gone. He can kiss cuddling you at night goodbye. No more listening to the sound of the other’s heartbeat to lull us to sleep. And he can no longer sleep easily, breathing in that comforting and home-y scent that you always have, of fleshly warmed blankets, sweet pastries, and the slightest bit of forest pine (kudos to you always wearing Jay’s hoodies and shirts).

He opens his phone once again and clicks on the latest photo he had of you. You look so happy here. Arms hugging your hoodie clad figure and smile so bright it could battle the stars. It was just a normal day then, but you made it feel so special… If only he knew what the future held, maybe then he would’ve cherished that moment just a little bit more. He strokes his thumb over the photo and lets his tears fall now, giving up on holding everything in. “I miss you, y/n, so so much. I hope you know that I still love you.” He bitterly laughs to himself. Does he even get to say that? “Sleep well angel, I hope I see you in my dreams.”

Did y'all see what I did there in the last sentence, hehe it hurts. I hope you all enjoyed reading. All support is much appreciated ^^

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caterpillarinacave · 8 months

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top 5 tsc ships, top 5 non-tsc books, top 5 types of fruit

top 5 tsc ships:

Henry and Charlotte of course. I love them to death. They set my romance standard.

Herongraystairs. Cassie let them have eachother.

Thomastair. Iconic ship, can't argue with it.

Gabrily. I'm not even as into them by themselves, they're just so funny together.

Sophideon. Similar to the above. I really like them in TID particulary Gideon is so stupid.

Top Five Non-TSC books;

Aghhhhh this is hard. These are just some I like, I could go on and on.

Breathing Room by Marsha Hayles. Childhood favorite of mine, awoke something within me. Set in just pre-WW2 America, in a tuberculosis sanituriom. Main character is, at the beginning, a 13 year old of german decent, and the book follows her years in the sanitorium. A lot of people die, so in some ways it's quite tragic, but its pretty short, and one of my favorites. It's still a hopeful and beautiful story.

The Book Jumper by Mechthild Gläser. Not sure how to describe it, buts its pretty damn good.

The Love Letter's of Abelard and Lilly by Laura Creedle. Anyone who is neurodivergent should read this now. It's a great story, and its so sweet, I love it.

Alice's Adventure's In Wonderland. One of my all time favorites, I have yet to read another book that replicates the experience I had reading AIW. It has a way of being totally chaotic while making total sense I havent seen any other book sucessfully replicate. Grouping this in together; Unbirthday by Elizabeth J. Braswell. It's a dark AIW spin off and is the best one I've read. It's everything Tim Burton's AIW was trying to be, and I wish it was more popular.

Cinnamon Moon by Tessa Hilmo. Hard to explain briefly but its amazing. It's set in post chicago fire chicago, about an irish american girl and her younger brother, both of whom have just been orphaned by the Peshtigo Wisconsin fire, a fire that happened almost at the exact same time as the chicago fire, and despite being arguably much, much worse in terms of damage and survival rate it is overshadowed by the Chicago fire. It's chock full of interesting, unique history, and is an excellent read.

Top Five Types of Fruit;

All depends on the season, so in no particular order;

Lemons. I love citrus and will eat any citrus fruit raw. Including lemons. Sue me.

Peaches. There is something very primal and comforting about slupring the sweet gold from a knife whilst ambrosia drips down your arms.

Kiwis. I really like them with a little brown sugar sprinkled over the top as a dessert!

Rasberries. I love berries in general. Blueberries, rasberries, and blackberries is my favorite fruit dessert. Just let me eat those three berries for days.

Apples. A good apple does wonders for me whenever my stomach hurts. Love them for that.

More than five but I am feeling like a rebel SO;

Pomegranates, oranges and grapes. If i could have all eight of these fruits I would be happy for love. I love how oranges make my mouth taste, good grapes are like straight candy for me and I love to eat pomegranate seeds by the handful from the empty husk.

#thanks for the ask!#i have a very close relationship with fruit #mmmmm sweet #currently in a standoff with blueberries though #because the last batch i had they were all bland and mushy #even the little ones #also book that almost made it #the little princess. i love that book #i really like descriptions of things #particularly food #like the scene describing saras little room or her gifts or her dinner or her clothes #cant get enough of that shit #there was a very specific scene from on the shores of silver lake by laura ingalls wilder where they describe whats in a pantry #i. love. that. scene.#i just read it again and again #it gives my brain scratches

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ptblogbasagre · 2 years

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e-journal: March

03/01/2022 NORMAL

Yesterday was a fun day for me. Today was too normal. I attended synchronous classes and I worked on some activities. I had lunch and I sleep. Well, that's my routine.

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03/02/2022 ASH WEDNESDAY

Angel sent me a message if we could meet and got the church to have ashes on our forehead. I told her we can go but I have to go to the barbershop to trim my hair. I went to the barbershop and told Angel that we could have coffee in Kape Sinauna before we go to the church. She and I met in Kape Sinauna. I ordered two iced Caramel macchiatos. She and I had a great time together until we decided to go to the church. It's already 6 p.m. and the mass has started. Before it finishes, the priest requested us to fall in line to have ashes, a cross on our heads. After that, we decided to go to the Iriga City Night park to have rides and fun.

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03/03/2022 BUKAL

It was a nice refreshing day today as my circle of friends decided to unwind. We went on an adventure to the spring in Santiago Iriga City. We were with my sister's friends at that time. We only tagged along with them. It was one of the best moments that I felt because it was also my first time in that place. I and the boys are happy and cherish the moment together as the vibe was refreshing, a serene place indeed

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03/04/2022 MIL QUIZ

Ma'am Lo, our MIL teacher has posted the easy test for March ever. It was refreshing as the quiz was easy to understand. The questions are from what we learned during her synchronous session last Thursday.

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03/05/2022 MEET UP

The podcasting has decided to have a meet-up for recording and dry run. It was our first meet ever! However, Yani and Reah aren't able to attend because they're from Naga, which is one 1hour away from Iriga City. Lenard is near Iriga and the Three of us, Angel and Letlet are from Iriga. We went to Biggs for our Lunch and we decided that we'll stay there for Dry Run. We spent 4 hours in Biggs after we finished polishing the dry run. Most of us decided to chill in Bolthole and we had some snacks and light beverages there. After that, we went home

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03/06/2022 REST DAY

Today was my rest day, I only did the household chores, watch movies, and sleep.

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03/07/2022 DRAINED I woke up early in the morning wanting not to move. It has been an ironic behavior yesterday. I don't know where did this behavior come from. I decided to sleep again since my brain told me to. It was 5 a.m. at that time and when I woke up again, it was 7 in the evening. I took a bath after eating then I went to sleep again. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

03/08/2022 UPSET

Aghhhhhh. I have a lot of tasks to accomplish on my to-do list. I don't know what to do in order. Some of them are on my missing item already and some are on the to-do list on my google classroom. It's hard to choose what to do firsttttt aghhhhh. huhuhu. I just want to cry and cry and cry.

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03/09/2022 BURNED OUT

So I'm feeling quite fine right now since I got to finish and reduce my workloads but I feel burned out right now. AHHHHHHHH huhu. I just need to fight for my dreams I guess.

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03/10/2022 TIRED

Just an update, I feel tired right now. I slept at 4 a.m. just to accomplish my tasks. Happily, it was reduced and accomplished already. I just need to sleep and gain my strength again. So I slept.

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03/11/2022 CONNECTED

I felt refreshed waking up. It's another day but a different one from the previous days. This time I felt new. Away from the stress and work to do. So I decided to hike at Inorogan and connect with nature. The bird was chirping simultaneously; the wind touches my skin; the weather was fine. I took three deep breaths and I felt relief. I now went home after the hike and decided to take some rest.

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03/12/2022 VOLUNTEER

I received an invitation from Solid Leni Iriga to attend their seminar for volunteers. So I decided to go since it was for Leni and the Tropang Angat. I wore my pink checkered long sleeves and my tight gray jeans and headed to Zion Hotel at Masuso Spring Resort located in San Isidro, Iriga City. Some Familiar faces are there like my Tita Carla and Tita Dokie are there as the head of the seminar. It was a fulfilled experience since we had a workshop on communicating with a supporter for other candidates where we had a chance to help them give awareness.

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03/13/2022 LBM

My tummy suddenly acts up. I went rushing to the comfort room to subtract some added foods from my stomach. I don't want this anymore ahhhhhh. I'm stuck here in the comfort room for almost an hour since my stomach is upset. I waited and waited until it is done and cleansed it afterward. I went to the comfort room and asked my mom for medication, however, there was no stock in the kit. Instead, he asked me to buy a "gaw gaw", a white powder used for making a thick sauce and a coke. She poured it into the glass and mixed the two until the gawgaw is dissolved. She let me drink the mixture. The taste was not bad tho. She told me to wait until the " traditional" medicine starts working. And I think it somehow worked.

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03/14/2022 JUST A DAY

It's just a normal day. Nothing much to say, I eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I'm sorry im too lazy to type HAHAHAHAH.

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03/15/2022 RECORDING

Omg! It's our recording day today and sadly, the face-to-face was canceled since Naga is on Alert level 2 at that time. So the team decided to record in our own space. Our piece was made through an audio recording. It has been a struggle tho since I need to check it individually and then upload on into google drive. It was tiring but it was satisfying for me since I had time to show my talent in podcasting again.

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03/16/2022 INTERVIEW

We had an interview with Kuya Bruce for the Work Immersion project that we will organize. We started at 7 p.m. and ended up at 9 p.m. I was with Cheska and Meca in the interview. We are the interviewers since we need some knowledge for our output. We were at the google meet at that time. Kuya Bruce shared his experience with the use of the theater play he organized and belonged to. Indeed it was inspiring for me since there are a lot of people who are still in the theater and we gained knowledge and awareness about the theater world.

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03/17/2022 BATH

My princess dog, Sunshine has accidentally sat on her poop. So I decided to waste her up. It's my first time taking her into a bath since I'm afraid to drown her in that warm water. She giggles her wet furs and it splashed on my face. At first, I am mad since my shirt was already wet. However, Sunshine made me smile by showing me her cute little smile and tongue. Ahhh, I felt happy with those smiles.

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03/18/2022 PUP

I attended the seminar for the PUP Radio Festival 2022 and they tackled misinformation and disinformation that are happening in the status quo, especially in the Philippine context. It was indeed learning since the diction is right for all the viewers. I love how the speaker gives examples and it's easy to understand.

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03/19/2022 NOTHING MUCH

This day was okay. And okay means it's just a normal day. I was surfing the internet getting entertained, eating, sleeping, and helping them with household chores. So yeah, I guess it's just a fine day.

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03/20/2022 YOUTHLED

Today is Sundayyyyy and it's YouthLed Day! We went to Legazpi at St. Ellis Hotel for the Onboarding Session for the YouthLed. I was with my two closest friends, Yani, and Kyla, together with Sir Carlo. It's my first time meeting Yani. She's so pretty tho and talkative. To be honest it's the greatest day of the month since it's my first time being a representative of a certain organization from my current school attending the session. We went home at 6 p.m. from Legazpi and they dropped me out of my home. It's already 9 p.m. It was a long long day.

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03/21/2022 SCHOOLWORK

It's just another normal day for me. I attended my synchronous classes, actively participate, and was drained. But reminiscing yesterday's ganap enlightened my mood. I remember that there should need to be done for the Filipino subject about creating bio notes. So I opened the Gdocs and created it. I saw Yani on the Gdocs typing. She's my partner by the way. Then, we rushed to finish that bio note since it's just easy to do.

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03/22/2022 CIANNAH DAY

Today was a special day for one of my closest friends, Ciannah. She turned 18 today. We greeted her at our socials since her celebration was set for the weekend. The epic photo of her was leaked by us of course, our sweet message was there. It's just normal for us to make fun of ourselves. I posted a funny picture of herself when she was a child. It was fine with her tho. We were laughing in the Gc about it.

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03/23/2022 MEMA

Mehh…. HASHAHSJSJSJSHSHHSSH. AJSJAJSHAHSHWHAHHHEEHEHSHSHAHHHHHHEHHEUEHSU3UUDUHHWU

I ain't like this anymore. I don't want to liveeeee. I'm tireddd huhuhuhu.

Just kidding.

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03/24/2022 NONE

Ahhh. okay. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

03/25/2022 SCRIPT

It's Meca's day today but tomorrow will be her celebration. I was invited to attend her celebration. I also volunteered to be one of her hosts if possible, and her sister ate Marj agreed. My partner will be Yana, so she and I created a script until midnight.

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03/26/2022 THE CELEBRATION

Todayyyy is the celebration and Meca didn't know there was a surprise on her aside from the Legazpi treat she organized. It was a long day indeed since we were at Legazpi to eat our Lunch at Kuya J's then we went to Highlands Park for the view and scenery. I was with Meca's friend. They are all approachable. I also met Cheska, My classmate for the first time. She was too shy but on the latter, she was also approachable and talkative. After we went from Highlands Park, we straightforward back to Naga for the Part 2 celebration, the Surprise. It was around 5 p.m. when we leave the Legazpi. We dropped by at Xentro Mall Polangui to urinate. We headed now to Naga. In Naga, Meca was too overwhelmed with the surprise as it was splendid indeed. The venue was surrounded by the Sparkles of Gold, Black, and Yellow. It was elegant. I and Yana Hosted the event and all I can say is that we enjoyed the night until midnight.

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03/27/2022 LONG DAY (CELEBRATION)

It was early in the morning when I woke up at GMJ Guest House in Caluag since we slept over at the place for Meca's Celebration. At 8 a.m. we decided to take our breakfast at McDonald's in Concepcion Pequeña with Raytheon, Naomi, Cheska, and me. We ordered our breakfast and waited for it. We talked until our order was served. We ate and as soon as we finished, we leave the place. I went back home to Iriga after that to prepare for Ciannah's debut party scheduled today. So I had a bus to take me home. However, the Bus suddenly stopped because the machine overheated so I had no choice but to find a jeepney since it's only available at that noon. I fetched a jeepney and headed to Iriga in no time. I slept for an hour to get rest and took a bath after I woke up to get prepared for the event. I wore my all-black attire and shined on that night.

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03/28/2022 DIZZY

After the night ended, I woke up dizzy and nauseous. I think it's because of the Drinks from last night's event. I'm tired and I keep on vomiting. I decided to take the whole day to rest.

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03/29/2022 SUNNY

it was sunny outside so I decided to ride my Bicycle. I went outside and patched my helmet as well as my arm sleeves to keep my skin color on. I move to find an ice cream since it's hot. I head to Uncle Doro's store and ordered 1 bucket of cookies and cream. I went home and ate that Ice cream.

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03/30/2022 INSPIRATION

We had a video call on Messenger with my dad. We talked for almost an hour about how do we feel. We checked on each other by asking how are we. I have seen how my dad works for the first time. He was on a big cargo ship surrounded by enormous machinery. He named a few of the many for me, but I couldn't remember them. It was an inspiration for me, to do well in class and outside class since there was my hard-working dad, ready to sacrifice his happiness for me and for his family on that ship surrounded by a vast ocean. He got to go already since he still has work to do. We said goodbyes to each other and hang up the call.

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03/31/2022 CONCERT

Tonight, there will be a Concert for Leni organized by the Youth for Leni. I prepared for my pink long sleeves with my matching white shorts. I also brought with me my Fuchsia fabric to wave it at the concert. It's already 6 p.m.and we started moving to be at the grandstand already. We walked to get there. As soon as we arrived, I saw Aika at the venue. We joined each other and enjoyed ourselves.

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#ejournal #diary entry #online diary

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arminiloveyou · 2 years

Note

Hi! I saw you have matchups open and I would love to have a romantic matchup for either aot or jjk. Or both!! I also have no preference if it’s a man or woman.

Sooooo I’m a Gemini and my personality type is ISFP. Im 23, I don’t have a pronoun preference but I am afab. I’m a figure skating instructor, and have been figure skating for over ten years. That’s my main hobby. With being a coach means I work with students of all ages every day so I am pretty outgoing, friendly, and I think I get along with just about everyone. I’ve even had really shy kids take a liking to me. I used to compete but I’ve since retired and now I just coach full time and practice here and there. I have other hobbies that I pick up every now and then like bass playing and painting but they don’t really stick much.

When it comes to relationships and dating I’m pretty forward. I make the first move often. My way of flirting is poking fun and teasing so as long as they don’t take it too seriously everything works out! I think I’m pretty charismatic.

The only difference between me and the pic crew is my hair is curly/wavy and is a brown black that fades into ashy blues/purples by the ends

Thanks a bunch!!!

omg i loved hearing about you!! i’ve always wanted to figure skate!!! thank you for your kindness helping people!! i hope you enjoy your matchup lovely!!

for jujutsu kaisen i match you with…

gojo satoru

i think you’re the first to get this perfectly imperfect but still perfect man you being in figure skating seriously draws gojo in. he absolutely cannot get enough of seeing n hearing you talk about it. he’ll be there as often as he can. he especially loves seeing you teach - especially with the younger kids. it warms his heart n attracts him to you like no other. like sooo much i cant even put it into words. it makes him feel so happy. he loves how direct you are but believe me he’ll give you a run for your money. his goal is always to make you blush. you’re super attractive to him in all ways. “jeez, y/n, you looked pretty good out there… well, i guess much more than pretty” he switches between low whispers in your ear where he bends down to immediately ruffling your hair. he’s a menace. you know at the end of the day he truly loves you. he’s in love with you. he’s a smiley guy but nothing compares to how he glows when he’s with you. whenever he has to go on missions he gets really fucking sad. he hates being apart from you. it’s like his life force is missing. “aghhhh y/n…. i hate it here, i promise i’m tryna finish everything up to get back asap… i know you understand my job but aghhhhh i miss you i can’t stand this…..do you miss me, my love?” he asks genuinely - he wants reassurance that the distance n the time apart is eating you alive just as it is him.

for attack on titan i match you with…

hangë zoe

another one totally enamored but your figure skating. they’ll constantly be picking your brain on the sport. “ahh y/n, have you ever thought of what would happen if….” “y/n, dear, i have a skate design idea!!” “ahhhh, y/n, i told you to be careful… yknow that it puts so much strain on your body…” they’re protective of you but soooo supportive if you ever wanna do solo events again. you being direct helps them a lot. they’re direct as well but i think that initial hurdle having been crossed by you will help them extinguish any doubts n be able to just go forward n trust you. they’d use dear, honey, sugar, sweetie, darling, n love for you!! also this may seem stupid but it popped into my head one day you came home from work to them holding a of pickles in their hand n watching a documentary. as they watched, they snacked. afterwards they put the jar away, brushed their teeth, washed their hands, n continued watching. after you’d gotten changed n settled you teased em about it. now the pair of you call one another “pickle.” they enjoy that you’ve found your passion. they’re proud that you know what fulfills you - it brings them soooo much comfort. “y/n… i hope you stay in my life for a long time, but like this… us together.” also they alwaysssss thank you for your support, love, n appreciation. you never have to worry.

sorry if the pickle thing makes you cringe :(

#arminiloveyou.matchups #aot matchup #jjk matchups

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likeaturledo · 5 years

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turtul au: soulmate edition (Leo)

Where everyone has their own distinct way of meeting their soulmates

at first Leo was confused as to why there were words written on his arm

“MY CHURROS”

he thought maybe it was one of his brothers pranking him again

writing on his arm with a sharpie

his first guess was mikey

it was always mikey

but unlike before when leo went to confront mikey he denied it

which was unmikey-like

so he asked raph

“dude, i could think of a million better pranks than sharpie”

“why would i even write that? what the heck are churros?”

donnie was an unlikely suspect

so leo just tried to wash it off

‘tried’

no matter what he tried it wouldn’t work

not water, no soap, he even tried detergent and dish washing soap

but the words just wouldn’t come off

so he just let it be

thinking that it would come off on its own

he really couldnt be bothered, it’s just marker right?

but it stayed on him for a long time

until april asked him about it

and he had to tell how it wouldn’t come off no matter what he did

april and casey looked at each other

“OMG I KNOW WHAT IT IS”

apperently the turtles didn’t have any idea how soulmates work

“It’s the first words your soulmate is going to say to you!”

“what?”

“usually people just get ‘hey’ or ‘watch where you’re going’ which is completely cliche”

“but your’s is weird bro, no offence”

‘full offence casey’ leo thought

but he was right

if this was his soulmate’s first words to him

shouldn’t it be “what are you?” or “don’t eat me!” or “AGHHHHH”

he didn’t even know what churros were until then

and everytime they’d go up top he would scan the restaurants

and usually they would be closed but he’d still look at them

and his brothers would make fun of him

mostly raph

“awww looking for your soulmate?”

“shut up raph”

and then there would be the fears

talking to him when he’d look at the words or just when he was meditating

‘it doesn’t matter if their first words isn’t scared or disgusted’

‘they’ll probably think of you that way’

so he does his best to ignore them

but he still thinks abt it

trying to rack up his brain for any possible scenario in which you would say that to him

until one night you get out of your apartment and towards a 24-hour convenience store

because you were starving

and craving churros

and stressed abt your soulmate bcs

“IM SO SORRY MISS”

and you thought maybe something bad would happen on your first meeting

like bumping into each other

no one likes their first meeting with their soulmate to be bad right?

you probably looked like a mess because it was 11 in the evening

and you were hungry and didn’t care if the cashier would look at you weird for buying cold churros in the middle of the night

he didn’t bcs you knew him

“hey stan”

“hey y/n”

but walking on the way home

you gotscared

bcs the trees looked like humans who had hands

and who wouldn’t be scared when lamp posts keep flickering

‘freaking cliche’ you thought

but you were still scared

so when the lights turned off for good you ran

you ran so fast you’d put usain bolt to shame

and you didn’t know where you were going

and you were so busy looking behind you for possible clown murderers you didn’t see yourself bumping into something

which might have caused a slight concussion

and made you dropped your churros

“MY CHURROS”

and what you thought was a lamp post turned around

and you were greeted by a giant turtle

‘woah his eyes-WAIT NO”

“MY CHURROS” you repeated “I JUST BOUGHT THAT”

“IM SO SORRY MISS”

thats when you both realized

‘OH SHIT WHAAAAAT’

leo didn’t realize he would be meeting his soulmate at 11:30 in the evening doing his rounds at the city

but then again they don’t really go out in the day

and you also didn’t think that would be your first meeting

you were right thinking you’d bump into each other though

altho you didn’t think it would be bcs you were running away from the dark

and you bumping into him

he was prepared for you to run away

or scream

or scream while running away

but

“MY CHURROS” third time saying it

bcs you were hungry

and craving

“i’m so sorry but i don’t really have anything on me...”

you breathed, kinda sad abt the churros but kinda excited that you ACTUALLY HAVE A SOULMATE NOW

SUCK IT OLDER SISTERS WHO FOUND THEIR SOULMATES FIRST

SUCK IT BFF WHOS BEEN TRYING TO SET YOU UP WITH GRADE A DOUCHES

“nah it’s fine, kinda my fault anyway...bumping into you...and stuff...”

cue awkward silence

you still ddin’t know abt the whole turtle stuff

but you felt terrible wanting to ask

BUT HIS EYES THO

WHO HAS THAT KIND OF PRETTY EYES

and leo kinda wanted to run away thinking you were too repulsed to say anything

SHES SO PRETTY WHAT THE HECKITY HECK WHAT DO I SAY WHAT DO I DO

‘i’m y/n’

‘i’m leo’

awkward silence pt.2

“JUST FRICKIN KISS ALREADY”

you heard from the roof

and leo kinda looked annoyed by it

“SHUT UP”

and you chuckled

which surprised him

cause you know siblings like ice cream knows sprinkles

‘brother?’

‘how’d you know?’

which you then proceeded to talk about siblings and family all the way to favorite music and movies

you went back to the convenience store with him

he didn’t want to go in at first bcs of...you know

but you reassured him that it would be fine

‘hey stan’

‘hey y/n’

the cashier just looked at you both and shrugged

“wha-”

“i’ve done worse here, this place is like a judgement-free zone!”

“i’ve also seen worse, hence, no cameras” -cashier said bored as he pointed to the cctv’s that were clearly not working “we just use it to scare off”

#tmnt #tmnt headcanons #tmnt aus #tmnt au #headcanons #au #aus #tmnt 2012 #tmnt 2014 #tmnt 2016 #tmnt 2018 #rottmnt #requests #tmnt requests #tmnt soulmates #teenage mutant ninja turtles

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jenjensthoughtbubbles · 2 years

Text

Dance or Coach/Trainer?...

Struggling trynna follow my heart rn.

I haven't been feeling heels classes as much as I have the Mentorship program.

I love the Mentorship program because I get to take my time learning with no pressure. Yes, the critiques are harder, but at least I don’t have to feel like the whole community is judging me. When I come to heels classes, we got females screaming for individuals. I’m there to show up only for myself. At least at the mentorship program, I get to talk to some of the new ladies in parts.

The V-Day series def. opened my eyes. We had to pair up, and it def worried me. Super flattered Ling asked if I wanted to partner with her. But in regards to the natural energy? I wasn’t feeling’ it. I feel like I don't belong. I’m stuck in the middle. I’m not a newbie, but I’m not a veteran either.

I hella hella hella miss beginner classes. I got to slow things down. It helped me retain choreo better and enjoy being in the feelings of each piece. She got to be personal with each of us and I was with a group of ladies with similar intentions- learning like newbies.

Those classes are now gone and replaced with all-levels. It’s too much of a push for me because the veterans def stick out. On top of that, it’s all filmed professionally so it’s super serious. I’m not ready for that.

Super dope that Ading Kelly hmu to take dance classes. Love that she thought of me when wanting to try out dance classes. Maybe she’s the sign to switch it up? I told her I’m down to take a class with her at Redwall if it fits my schedule. She instantly booked a Weekend Workshop. And get this? It’s with RIDHI... in FREESTYLING? Sheeeeeshhh! For sure a game changer. But, I’ll work my way there. Talk about leaving her comfort zone (like she asked) for sureeee. And mine too without a doubt.

Another thing in the back of my mind is my body confidence. I want to be able to wear sexy clothes and feel my best in heels class. But how can I do that if I’m not in better shape?

JC has been a big help in helping me realize I need to meal prep. But the natural strong connection just isn't there. Meal plans came late. Check-in forms came in late. Hearing that Jay pays $200/month for meals and a workout plan? Crazy that he has both and I’m over here paying #300 a month (locked in for 3 months) just for food. If there’s anything I can take away, it’s that I have to meal prep and save money vs. buying fast-food. Which by the way? HELLA expensive. Can’t believe I’m literally eating my money.

Finding a workout program is also tough. The Booty King is dope, but I need someone to help me correct my form if I strength train. Jay has recommended X to Coach me. I think I for sure would vibe with her more than John. She is fasho a thick sis and has experience coaching and competing. But it falls back to her being far away and me needing someone to fix my form.

My head is all over the place. Looking for a coach. Looking for Beginner Heels class. Taking up maybe a different dance style and switching up the feeling? Those Skillshops did catch my eye. Locking... Whacking... Beginner Hip-Hop with Emerson? I just hate the parking at Full Out. Getting in my head to maybe stick it out with heels and F the rest? Or following my heart and staying with the mentorship but finding training somewhere else? AGHHHHH.

All I know is for sure, I need to take tmr for me to figure things out. Funny how it’s on Valentine’s Day, but maybe it’s a sign for starting with loving myself and putting myself first? That typa love. Maybe Jay is right. I need to be selfish...

I’ll figure it out.

#fitness #dance

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fanficsofmine · 7 years

Text

Sick: Chanyeol scenario

A/N: Hey everyone! I want to say a few things about this one shot before I post it. First and foremost I wanted to tell you that this actually happened to me.. I got sick this exact way and this one hits home big time for me so bear with me because its also a really long fic, like over 2k words. So pull up a chair, grab a snack and I sincerely hope you enjoy this. Love you guys! -admin A

“Someone just come kill me please” I whine, cuddling into the covers. I’ve been sick for the past week and I feel like complete death.

I’ve been to the hospital twice now and they can’t figure out why my temperature has been out of control and why I don’t feel like eating anything. I can’t keep down that I eat anyway, so there’s really no point in trying.

The only reason I have even eaten anything all week is because Chanyeol makes sure of it. I love him, but he worries about me too much sometimes. He’s been working so hard and the last thing I need is for him to stress himself out any more trying to take care of me.

Today was the worst of it and I couldn’t get out of bed if I wanted to. I was so weak that if I wanted to go to the bathroom or do anything for myself I had to crawl.

I reach for the thermometer at my bedside and check my temp. 104.7F, the highest it’s been all week. I lay back down but it feels like a brick is sitting on my chest. I’m absolutely miserable, but I muster up the energy to sit upright, only to start coughing profusely.

I cough so hard that my eyes water and I can barely breathe. I try to stand to go to the bathroom and my knees go weak, but I catch myself in time to get back onto the bed and I do the only thing I can think of. I call Chanyeol.

I know he’s at work and I don’t want to worry him, but I also need to tell him. His phone rings a few times and I leave him a voicemail telling him what’s going on and ask him to call me back.

He calls me back almost immediately. Just hearing his voice makes me feel a little bit better, but I know that I can’t take care of myself with how I’m currently feeling.

I tell him everything that’s going on and tell him that I think it’s a good idea that I go to the hospital to get checked out. He agrees and I hear rustling from the other end of the phone.

“Baby? What’s going on?” I inquire. After about a minute, he replies.

“Sorry I was talking to my manager. Since I’m done with my part of the photoshoot they’re going to let me leave so I can take you to the hospital. I’ll be home in twenty. I love you.”

“I love you too. See you when you get here.” I hang up the phone and try to look presentable to no avail. I can’t even get out of bed let alone dress myself, so I lay in bed until he arrives. He finally gets here after what feels like ages and walks into the bedroom to see me in my pitiful state.

“Jesus babe you weren’t kidding.” He says as my body goes into another coughing spell. Once I finally stop coughing I tell him about the fever and how weak I am. He puts one of his masks on and helps me out of bed. He walks me to the bathroom, helps me get dressed and takes me to the hospital.

When I got into triage the nurse took my vitals and she took me straight back because my heart rate was high. I get into bed and the nurse comes in and immediately hooks me up to heart monitors and an IV. They tell me I’m dehydrated and give me fluids, and tell me since my heart rate is so high they need to monitor it while I’m here.

I nod and explain everything to them and answer the questions they ask. Chanyeol sits in the chair next to the bed and holds my hand, watching intently as the nurse finishes up what she was doing. Even when he’s wearing his mask I can tell that he’s worried. His thumb rubs my hand absentmindedly and I calmly reassure him that this is the best place for me right now.

“They need to find out what’s going on with me and why I’m so sick.” I explain. He nods and runs his free hand through his hair.

“I knowww” He whines,”I just hate seeing you like this” I squeeze his hand and sigh.

“I hate feeling like this so I don’t blame you. Let’s just hope that they can find out what’s going on so I can get medicine and get the hell out of here.”

He nods and we sit quietly until the doctor arrives.

He comes in and I answer his questions and he orders me a chest x-ray. I get taken down and get my x-ray taken while Chanyeol waits in my room. I return to my room minutes later and the doctor follows. I never expected him to read my results as fast as he did and I certainly wasn’t prepared for his diagnosis.

“You undoubtedly have right middle lobe pneumonia. We will keep you here and monitor you closely and start you on IV antibiotics and breathing treatments. You’ll be here for at least three days if not longer since your case is so severe” the doctor explains. He leaves the room so the nurse can get me ready to transfer to a room.

“Aghhhhh. THREE DAYS? I can’t handle three days here” I groan, lying back in my hospital bed.

“It’ll be okay. Remember you’re here to get better” Chanyeol reminds me, rubbing my arm, careful to not touch my IV. Before I could respond, the nurse came in to transfer me to my room.

Once we get to my room I turn on the TV and get settled in. I meet my new nurse and she checks me over and gets me started on my antibiotics before leaving the room.

Chanyeol took a detour through the cafeteria to get snacks because he was hungry. He returns to my room with an armful of snacks and drinks for the both of us. I’m still not up to eating, but I take sips of the water he brought me.

“What did I ever do to deserve a boyfriend like you?” I ask, impressed with how well he’s dealing with everything that’s going on.

Shrugging his shoulders, he replies, “You just got me by being you. You didn’t need to do anything else.” He smiles and snags the remote from my bed and starts flipping through channels, finally settling on a comedy.

I try talking him into going home and resting, but he dismisses that idea quickly. He stays with me through dinner, trying to coax me to eat something. I ate a few bites to make him happy, but I genuinely had no appetite, so eating was difficult for me.

At first, he insisted on staying with me and sleeping in the chair but I insisted he go home and sleep. He whined at first, but we both knew that he would sleep much better in his own bed. I could tell he wanted to kiss me goodbye like he normally did but there’s no way in hell I was letting him get sick, so he placed a hand on my face and told me he loved me before he left. I settled into bed shortly after he left and drifted off to sleep.

The next three days were hell. They consisted of getting poked and prodded, breathing treatments three times a day, nurses being late with my meds, not being allowed to shower, coughing so hard I thought my lungs were going to collapse, and being bored out of my mind completely because I was only allowed up to go to the bathroom.

The only thing keeping me going was when Chanyeol would come to visit. My second day there, he came and brought flowers and get well balloons. He told me all about his day and that the other members sent their love. Jongdae sent him with an arsenal of jokes to make me laugh, which then made me cough, so he stopped saying them after the first few.

On my third day, he decided it would be a good idea to blow up a glove like a balloon and bat it around my room. That ended quickly once the nurse came in and scolded him. I couldn’t stop laughing at the look on his face when the she walked into him doing that. I was in better spirits and was starting to get my appetite back. To my surprise, I was able to keep my entire dinner down by day three. I originally thought I was going home by day three, but the doctor had other plans.

“We’re going to keep you for a few more days. You’re not progressing as quickly as we would have hoped, so we are going to give you more antibiotics and watch you. The Infection that you had ended up in your blood stream, and if you had waited much longer, you may not be here talking to me right now. I’m glad you came in when you did. “he explained.

It took a moment for my brain to catch up with what he was saying “Wait, you’re telling me if I would’ve waited to come in I could have DIED?” I questioned, my eyes wide from the shock of what he said.

“That’s exactly what I’m telling you. Also, your liver enzymes are high, probably from all of the antibiotics we gave you, so until we can get them back to normal levels, you have to stay here.” He added.

“Can I at least get a shower? I’ve been here for three days and haven’t had a chance to get myself cleaned up.” I beg. I really didn’t want to be here any longer, but it looks like I don’t have a choice.

“Of course. I’ll write an order so the nurses know you can shower at will. No problem” He leaves the room and I call Chanyeol to tell him what’s going on. He sounded sad because he had a full schedule today and couldn’t come see me, but I reassured him I’d be okay. I didn’t tell him about almost dying. I couldn’t tell him something like that on the phone, so I decided I’d tell him that later.

He facetimed me on break to keep me company and Sehun stole his phone and passed it around to the other members so they could all send their love.

Junmyeon and Sehun said that we would have a party when I got better, Baekhyun and Jongdae told me jokes, Jongin asked me if I was okay, Kyungsoo promised to cook for me once I got home, and Minseok and Yixing promised to give me the biggest hug when I got home since they couldn’t come visit.

I thanked them all, they gave the phone back to Chanyeol and I told him I loved him before he had to go back to practice.

The next two days went by much smoother than the first three. I was still tired of getting blood drawn every morning but I was starting to feel a little better. I was finally able to shower, and I could finish full meals and keep it down. The best part about day five is that I was finally able to go home! I excitedly called Chanyeol to tell him what was going on and he could get his schedule rearranged so he could take me home.

I waited impatiently for Chanyeol to get here, practically bouncing in my seat. I see him walk into the hospital and his face lights up when he sees me stand and walk to him under my own power.

“You have no idea how happy it makes me to see you’re feeling better.” He beams.

“And you have no idea how happy I am to see you. Let’s go home.” I reply, hugging him tightly.

We finally get to the house and I walk straight to the bedroom and flop down on the bed.

“I have never missed a piece of furniture so much in my life” I sigh.

“I have never missed a person as much as I’ve missed you all week” Chanyeol sighs, lying down next to me on the bed.

“Baby, there’s something interesting I found out when I was in the hospital,” I eased into the conversation so I didn’t scare the shit out of him.

“Oh yeah? What happened?” He asked, propping his head up on his arm and turning to face me.

“So… the doctor told me that the infection I had went into my bloodstream, and If I would’ve waited much longer than I did, I could have died… you know, no big deal or anything.” I say, trying to lighten the mood a little.

“Wait what?!?! I could’ve LOST you?!” he exclaims. I could see the tears starting to pool in his eyes, so I try to quickly reassure him that I was okay.

“Technically yes but I’m okay! I’m right here and I’m better than I was! Chanyeol, look at me.” my hands reach out to cup his face, guiding him to look at me. I explain “Baby, I’m fine. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”

A few tears escape and stream down his face. I wipe them away quickly and pull him into me, wrapping my arms around his neck. He buries his face in my neck and lets all of the stresses of the week out at one time.

I shush him and rub his back trying to help console him, tears streaming down my own face in the process. This last week has been hell for the both of us, but I wouldn’t have been able to deal with it as well as I did without Chanyeol.

After a few minutes, he calmed down and we look at each other. I run a hand through his hair, gently playing with it as he runs his hand up and down my arm.

“Thank you so much for taking care of me this week. I love you so much and I don’t know what I’d do without you” I whisper, watching him intently.

“You don’t need to thank me baby, I’m just so glad that you’re okay and that you’re still here with me. I don’t know what I would do If I lost you. I love you more than you can ever imagine.” He cups my face with his hands and places a gentle kiss on my forehead. He pulls me in close and plays with my hair until we both fall asleep.

#chanyeol #park chanyeol #chanyeol imagine #pcy #exo chanyeol #exo imagine #this is so close to home for me #i sobbed #chanyeol fluff #chanyeol angst #kind of #kpop #kpop imagine

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