#'BITCH THATS A WANT OUTFIT HES GONNA DO WANT' and then two songs later he did
Note
apologies if someone's already asked this but... favorite taemin stylings and sets/stages?
i've had fave songs but not fave styles and sets!!!! thank you anon this is great.
- ok my top stage is probably the advice inkigayo one take stage, because 1) the full loverboy styling and also the backup dancers have impeccable outfits too, 2) i loooooove the neoclassical set (the fact that main sculptures are laocoön and his sons, where the story in virgil is that he is punished by being attacked by snakes for attempting to expose the trojan horse as a ruse) and the THRONE!!! also the inverted triangle!! has a bunch of different meanings, including: the alchemical symbol for water (fluid and formless, also in the projections) and the symbol for femininity, the symbol of the father, son, and the holy ghost (christianity), and 3) the choreography of advice is the only choreo of taemin's that was conceived post covid and thus it's meant for specifically for the accompanying camerawork, which you can really see in the various ways that it gets filmed.
- my other all time fave styling is this outfit from the ngda beyond live:
which also included a burned jacket and an eyepatch, which he used to perform criminal, idea, guess who/sexuality, heaven, and door.
- another fave styling is the danger stage from shinee world 2014 at tokyo dome, with the giant blue fur coat and shirtless leather jacket and the giant cross and the revolver. peak solo taemin image change bullshit and i love it.
- tbh i love most of the styling from advice but the white cropped sweatsuit look really did make me lose braincells. like the chunky earrings and the harness and the bobby pins and mascara tear tracks and the pseudo sports bra it all lives rent free in my empty skull
- just. all the styling from criminal and ngda in general. obvs love the dark virgin mary getup and the chainmail and also the gucci suit with the chainsaw, but the lava suit and the hell set from the 2020 kbs song festival..........MWAH. and the royal blue satin hanbok from the king taemin mama 2020 stage....................with the cape.............. i also do like the set here as well, very inspired choice to go with this tron style hyper neon hanok/palace and pair it with more traditional fabrics and embroidery.
- i also find the original move styling ideologically very fascinating, partially because everyone kinda just....forgot about it? it's been eclipsed by all the newer versions that he's done where his general styling has shifted much more towards the 'feminine' end of the spectrum, but the original stages are a very interesting deconstruction of traditional western masculine silhouettes with emphasis on a particularly 'masculine' feature: muscular arms. most of the looks are sleeveless muscle shirts or graphic tshirts, but interestingly also a very skinny fit double breasted pinstripe suit, which is huge symbol of post-war and post-modern masculinity in western fashion. you can see this continuing deconstruction with other tracks on the move album; like with stone heart, where he's got this strange and kind of incredible sweatervest/suspenders/ultra high waisted trouser combo for the offsick concert, which is very clearly an appropriation of classic 'scholarly'/academic type fashion.
- as far as sets go, really all i want to talk about is how taemin puts sooo much thought into his stages (like the actual physical stages) for his tours. he's so interested in providing these very unique experiences in terms of stage technology which is not something a lot of artists think about. like for his first solo concert at nippon budokan he did a concert entirely in the round, which is pretty much unheard of for a stadium show. there's also the double hydraulic lifts from xtm, everything that was happening for t1001101 (the slanted stage, the lighting rigs), and then for the ngda beyond live, a redux of the slanted stage that also was separated into three different hydralic sections and drone camera integration (dream maker studios posted the dronecam version of heaven so you can see some of the stage in action). there's so much tech that goes into his performances that i really wanted to talk about that a bit, because i'm a nerd and stadium stage design is sometimes sooooooo boring. taemin really makes the effort to step up his game not only personally, but in everything around him as well.
#kpop questions#taemin meta#taemin#so much of the advice styling is about taemin (the persona) as an enlightened being outside the boundaries#after rejecting the strict christian dichotomy of ngda#who is also exposing the hypocrisy and flaws of that system#(hence the choice of the laocoon reference methinks)#its all very 'new formless god' energy and i really need to finish that advice writeup#i have three different other taemin posts in my drafts a;ldkjfalskj i need to get a move on lmao#other faves include the triple belted jumpsuits from want era. the teal hair from final life/nippon budokan. the green hair from famous#that one pyn performance video with the plum suit#im trying not to list everything he's ever done lmao#taemin's mvs are good but it's how he conceptualizes each of his eras into specific accessories and silhouettes that is just so!!!!!!!!#like when i was watching ngda with my friend and he showed up in that velvet matador-esque outfit with the one glove and i was like#'BITCH THATS A WANT OUTFIT HES GONNA DO WANT' and then two songs later he did#text#answers#also there's history around the inverted triangle and the queer community thanks to the n*zis so take that how you will#actually the trinity might be a regular triangle not an inverted one i cant remember. whatever it's still a triangle#WAIT ALSO triangle halo denotes god the father in iconography (as opposed to circular for saints and square for humans)!!!
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OK I GOT 5 HOURS OF SLEEP LAST NIGHT WHICH IS PRETTY OK IG (I did stay up to read the fic-) BOTH MY TESTS WENT LIKE SHIT, I HAD AN ANXIETY ATTACK IN PROGRAMMING CLASS BECAUSE BY TEACHER IS A LITTLE SHIT WHO KEPT ON YELLING AT ME WHEN I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND SOMETHING AND I SPENT LUNCH ALONE BUT AT LEAST NOW IM ALONE WITH MY LAPTOP SO YAYAYAYYA
first of all, this chapter right here is my comfort chapter from now on. i said what i said. I will be rereading it again and again just because i can. it was PERFECTION
here's me going crazy at 2 am yesterday.
MAGNUS' CHAPTER
LET'S GO LET'S GO LET'S GO
AHHHHHHH IT'S THEIR ANNIVERSARY
SCREAM
oh
alec shaved his beard because it made him look older
RAFAEL WAS SO UPSET AFTER THE MEXICO ATTACK BECAUSE OF ANJALI RIGHT??
magnus and alec are the oblivious parents istg
“Are you decent?” Max yelled. “I don’t want to be traumatized again.”
“Hey! We agreed not to talk about that!” Alec yelled back.
Im not even surprised at this point
“Happy anniversary, bapa!” Rafael kissed him on the cheek and handed him the flowers.
“Where are my flowers?” Alec asked.
Rafael plucked a rose from the bouquet and threw it at Alec. “Here you go.”
“Thanks, son,” Alec mumbled.
IM WHEEZING
DAVID BAKES
“David made it,” Max said shyly. "
Oh,” Alec replied and then shrugged. “Well, the icing could be a little sweeter I think.”
Ever since Max started dating, Alec had become incredibly protective. Alec liked David of course – it was impossible to find someone who didn’t. But that didn’t mean Alec approved.
And it didn’t help that the blond boy was absolutely terrified of Alec.
ALEC STOP TEASING HIM
THE BOY IS ALREADY SCARED
“I don’t know,” Alec analysed the card. “David used too much glitter.”
“Since when do you have a problem with excessive glitter?” Max demanded.
ALEC
“I didn’t use him!” Max huffed. “He was thoroughly compensated for his efforts!”
“Compensated how?” Alec asked.
“Uh,” Max said. “With donuts.”
when i saw donuts i immediately thought of rose and luisa from jtv
iykyk
but should i continue the show? i got tired of jane continuously embarrasing herself
“You expect us to follow rules?” Alec asked in surprise. “In our own home? On our anniversary?”
The warlock boy grinned wickedly before leaning close to Alec.
“You better do it, or I will tell everyone about your secret,” Max whispered.
Alec blinked at that.
the secret...
I DONT LIKE HOW MANY THINGS POPPED INTO MY HEAD
is highschool musical that bad? i havent watched it. should i?
what if i cried
i just wanna hug alec??? but i cant say it'll be ok because it wont
“Is that why you are not attending?” Magnus grinned at his friend. “Or is it because you are terrified of Georgia?”
“That child is the reincarnation of Christopher Lightwood!” Ragnor complained. “I heard she made explosives out of demon ichor! Who makes explosions out of demon ichor?”
RAGNOR IS PROBABLY GETTING FLASHBACKS
THESE STUPID FUCKING BITCHES
how tf do you think we have survived huh??
medicine that's how
vaccines, anti biotics and what not
stop being close-minded and fucking do it
ok i know the risk is great
BUT OTHERWISE THEY ALL DIE
it was different for warlocks. The Shadow World was their universe. The nephilim kept it safe. At one point in their lives, they had learned to coexist with them, out of necessity and out of obligation.
And now here they were – working together in the name of friendship and love.
how things change...
what
say what
the causes are what
ok let's not jump to conclusions
im fucking crying wtf
alec doesnt deserve this shit
all he's done is make the world a better place
hes worked so hard on this
RAZIEL CAN GO FUCK HIMSELF
what am i supposed to say to my parents if one of them comes to check on me and im sitting here crying at 2 am
He didn’t want to believe in a reality that would punish Alec. Alec who only wanted to do what is good and right.
Alec was who was losing his hope and strength every passing day. Alec who was struggling. Alec who was turning to desperate measures to cope with all the stress.
please alec
no please
THE ANGELS ARE BITCHES
Because if Magnus found out Raziel was the one causing all this pain for Alec, he would march up to heaven and set the bastard on fire himself.
AND I'LL GO WITH HIM
KNEW THE SPY WAS LIVVY
AWW RAGNOR LIKES SELENA THATS SO SWEET
blue and gold
STOP IT IM CRYING AGAIN
The shadowhunter was a good influence on him. Magnus hoped Alec would see it sooner rather than later.
HUH
HUHU
HUH
omg
GIGI GETTING A SIBLING
“Max isn’t allowed to do a lot of things,” Magnus chuckled. “But he does them anyway.”
thats my boi
GASP
]THE NECKLACE
rafael is growing into the consul voice
they grow up so fast
nope nope he's still the little 5 year old
voice cracking what do you mean he's 20
im glad hes happy with mila. or is he...?
Magnus had deduced as much. Alec lived in his beautifully oblivious world. But Magnus noticed.
He noticed the hickeys. He noticed the late-night visits. He noticed the tense phone calls.
well thank god there's at least one non-oblivious person (alec i love you so much but you are very very oblivious)
“What’s stopping you then?” Magnus asked.
"2554 miles,” Rafael chuckled sadly.
me with all my online friends
probably more miles
Magnus tried to do the math but promptly gave up.
me
But Alec did lie though. Magnus pushed the thought away.
NOT NOW
LET ME LIVE IN PEACEFUL OBLIVION
HUSH
“Except melt it?” Rafael chuckled.
“Yes,” Magnus chuckled back. “As you can see, the bar is extremely low in the Lightwood family.”
AHHIUCCDSKUHDCV
i have no clue what the words describing the outfit are
time to google
OK PRETTY
Fifteen years. Fifteen years of loving and Alec still made his heart stutter.
dont do this to me right now I WILL CRY
“What the hell?” Max exclaimed. “Why are you all dressed up?”
“In case you haven’t noticed, it’s my anniversary,” Alec chuckled.
Max-
Fifteen years. Fifteen years and Magnus still took Alec’s breath away.
HJCSDHJBJDHSGCDYGJVVC JHVDFYMJ
it's not funny MY EYES ARE WATERING
“Bapak is a good looking one in the family,” Rafael pointed out. “You are the chaotic one and I am the smart one.”
“What am I then?” Alec asked dryly. “A sack of potatoes?”
“You’re the sexy one,” Magnus grinned. “A sexy sack of potatoes.”
yes.
Alec grinned back and leaned forward. Magnus put his hands around Alec’s neck and kissed him. He kissed Alec with all the love he had inside his heart.
Just like the first time. Just like the hundredth time. Just like the thousandth time.
Because with Alec, every kiss mattered. Every single one.
muffled sob
“Stop making out, oh my god!” Max groaned.
Magnus sensed a pillow coming their way but Rafael caught it before it hit them.
“Max, stop!” Rafael scolded. “You will wrinkle dad’s suit and ruin bapak’s hair! I spent hours ironing both!”
why is max me when i see people display affection in front of me
ALSO RAFAEL HKUIUIDCSKIHUDFVHJDFVHU
“They are here,” Rafael said. “You two better look exactly the way you did when I left with Max or I will raise hell.”
IM SCREAMING
Selena was wearing a blue crop top with the words “MIND YOUR OWN UTEREUS” written in gold.
i need that top
DAVID'S SHIRT IS THE COLOR OF MAX'S MAGIC
AHH ISABELLE DOESNT KNOW SHE'S PREGNANT YET
The argument of “who gave the best gift” had started when Jace and Izzy had gotten drunk on vodka. It didn’t help that Alec had gotten drunk as well. All three Lightwood siblings had then proceeded to have an argument about who had the best spouse. The whole night had been drunken chaos. Magnus, Clary and Simon had let them have it since the Lightwood siblings had a tendency to carry the world on their shoulders even when nobody asked them. They rarely ever let loose ever since their worlds had plunged into sickness and demon attacks. Especially Alec. So, Magnus had let his husband be that 18-year-old boy again. The boy who got drunk and fought with his siblings and sang songs about Magnus’ pretty eyes.
OH MY GOD THE CHAOS
Georgia considered that. “I’m not allowed to melt it, right?”
“No,” they all replied in chorus.
LET GIGI MELT IT
SELENA IM SO PROUD OF YOU
“Dad,” Max said. “Can you keep a picture of me wearing this necklace in your office?”
“Why?” Rafael asked.
“I think it will piss off the boomers,” Max giggled.
“Nice!” Lexi grinned. “A downworlder wearing a shadowhunter heirloom? They will lose their heads. Uncle Alec, you must do it.”
“I will do you one better. I will hang a tapestry,” Alec chuckled.
YASSS I CANT WAIT FOR THE SHADOWHUNTERS TO BE PISSED
AWW THEY DIDNT KNOW THE NECKLACE USED TO BELONG TO MAGNUS
he actually gave to camille first-
Why couldn’t this boy just cause chaos during his travel year like the rest of them? Why did he actually study and do his research as recommended?
why would you NOT study and research during your travel year????
oh shit
well well well
david bby stfu
i love you but pls stop speaking for all our sakes
“Holy shit,” Max said. “It is expensive then!”
“Don’t pawn the ruby!” Rafael warned.
MAX NO-
OH THE STONE COMES FROM EDOM
oh no
pls dont fight
oh so i was wrong about magus confronting him from that snippet
all you need to know is im sobbing right now and grammarly is the only thing making this coherent
dont mind me just
NO I FORGOT ABOUT MAX AND DAVID
GET BACK IN THE ROOM YOU IDIOTS
don't do this to me at 3 am
OK THE DILF PART
thank you for adding light into my life again
(me while editing this: today really isn't my day huh? i just slipped in rainwater outside my balcony because I heard rain and ran there. now my knee and back hurt and I think I sprained (?) my toe-
ANYWAY
wait im gonna go check out the rain and then continue editing this
ok i got bored of the rain)
that made me laugh through my tears
“Objectively good looking?” Jace snorted. “Excuse you, but my parabatai is smoking hot! He is a freaking prize, okay? If we had a magazine for hot shadowhunters, you would be on the cover page. Every single issue.”
“Okay, that’s enough!” Alec interrupted. “Magnus, are you happy? Now all my friends have told me I am pretty.”
“I said smoking hot,” Jace corrected.
“We are not being biased,” Clary pointed out. “It is the general consensus, Alec.”
“It’s true,” Lexi said. “So many people have asked me for your number, Uncle Alec. And I would have given it to them if I wasn’t worried about being turned into a marshmallow.”
LEXI DUHDUGHUDFCUHKVDFUIKFDU
“Dad, I don’t know why you are so worried,” Max said in a bored tone. “You’re a told DILF.”
David choked on his champagne and Jace patted him on the back.
“What the hell is a DILF?” Alec demanded.
“Oh, I know this one!” Jace said excitedly. “It means Dashing and Irresistible Looking Father. Max is right, you are a total DILF.”
“Mr. Herondale-” David raised a hand.
“I heard one of the shadowhunters in their travel year calling me a DILF too,” Jace said proudly.
THAT IS NOT WHAT DILF MEANS OH MY GOD
“It’s not a rumour,” Selena spoke up and passed her phone. “There is a group chat at Scholomance just to thirst after you.”
add me to it
ALL THE COMMENTS I CANT BREATHE
“Alec Lightwood can run me over with a Maserati and I would thank him.”
“Give me that,” Izzy grabbed the phone and started giggling. “Petition for Consul Alec Lightwood-Bane to stab me with his mortal sword.”
“Isabelle!” Alec hissed, cheeks flaming. “Stop it!”
“I want one!” Jace grabbed the phone now. “By the Angel!”
“Read it!” the kids yelled in chorus.
“I would gladly let Consul Lightwood-Bane inspect my mortal instruments,” Jace chuckled and threw the phone at David.
David shook his head vehemently and threw it at Max.
“My body is just a hole for Alec Lightwood,” Max read out loud and started laughing so hard that he fell off his chair.
Lexi grabbed the phone and giggled. “I want the Consul to strip off my runes among other things.”
She passed the phone to Gigi, who looked at the phone and look at Alec.
“Uncle Alec,” the girl said. “This person wants you to crush them with your massive archer arms.”
“Give me that,” Rafael grabbed it now. “Aw, this one is a classic, dad. Alec Lightwood turned me gay.”
He threw the phone at Simon, who stared the screen and looked up. “Uh, I don’t think I can read this one out loud in front of the kids.
“Is this the one about the basement?” Selena chuckled and Simon nodded.
WHAT'S THE BASEMENT ONe
TELL ME
AWW GIGI AND LEXI PUTTING MAKEUP ON DAVID AND MAX RECORDING IT
google translator time
oooo Rafael's gonna talk with Mila
Magnus you're such a good father
seriously
“Sometimes things are just sad. So, you need to let yourself be sad.”
YES
SAY IT LOUDER
THEY ARE UNDER THE BED
AHHH MAX AND DAVID
DAVID CALLED HIM MY ANGEL IN FRENCH
Alec and Magnus hiding under the bed and spying on them is just-
Jace had tried to give Max the shovel talk and had gotten a little too emotional.
of course, he did smh I love him so much
“David doesn’t need a shovel talk,” Alec smiled. “He knows what would happen to him if he hurts my son.”
David gulped. “You will throw me into the silent city?”
“I will ask me husband to portal you to hell,” Alec said – Consul Voice. “We have relatives there.”
the beloved relatives yes
“Goodnight,” Jace gave them a salute. “Have fun inspecting Magnus’ mortal instruments.”
JACE
OH SO THE QUESTION WAS ABOUT SMOKING
damn it
oh my god guys he said he'll stop smoking
just lemme have this moment
my boy's lungs will be intact
HIS LUNGS WILL BE OK
“I can’t wait to see all the messages on the chat after that,” Magnus giggled.
Alec looked up. “I’m more than a tall glass of water, Magnus!”
SCREAMING
In his dream, he saw them again. But they weren’t smiling this time.
what
wait
THE PROPHETIC DREAMS
nope nope nope
Nah I don't know what you're talking about
haha
damn, I think I really hurt my back...
OK BUT THE IMMORTALITY ANGST???? WAS SO SO GOOD???? I know it makes me cry but is it bad that I'm always so excited for angst written by you because of HOW GOOD it is????
"When I die I will love you from my grave" I NEED THIS ON MY FOREHEAD OH MY GOD I LOVE THESE TWO SO SO MUCH
alright I need to get something for my back and my knee (I'm home alone so this will be fun)
OK, I THINK THE NEXT CHP WILL BE ANJALI'S POV I JUST FEEL IT!!! I miss my girl so much I hope she's doing ok. Jaime too...
I'm rereading all of these chapters after chapter 10 because why not. Bye!!
OKAY I AM GLAD YOU LIKED IT BUT I AM ALSO DEEPLY WORRIED ABOUT YOUR HEALTH.
I hope your knee and back feels better soon!
also fuck that teacher yelling something doesn't make people understand it any better ugh dumb piece of shit anyway screw that person.
I hope you get some good rest and recovery from this rollercoaster of a day.
Take care!
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Song for this chapter
•just might - summer walker
• rehab winter in paris - brent faiyaz
"𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐄𝐄 shows canceled in a row what am I supposed to do Ceaira?!" Y/n said through the phone.
"Idk bubs i'd help you if I could but I can't this time we made a promise." "I just need ideas on another way of income Cee thats it." Y/n responded
"What about OnlyFans."
"What."
"OnlyFans. You can use your old skills and do only fans."
"Bitch the only old skill I have is stripping-" y/n stopped to think. "Boom. There you have it. And you have everything you need already so whats the issue?" Cearia said.
"What if my manager finds out?" Y/n asked. "Well lets ask him." Cearia says.
My manager. Carlos Cre. Cearia's boyfriend. Im mean yea he probably wouldn't give two fucks about me having a OnlyFans. Its mostly my rep thats on the line.
"Yoo!" Carlos said. "So Y/n wants to know if she can have a OnlyFans since ya know the income is getting low." Cearia says. " i mean yea its her life."
"Really?" "Yea, do you just don't ya know get hurt."
____
"Ok, wait thats it? That was quick." I say to my self. I walk to my room I used to practice in but now use to relieve stress. "What should I put on for my first post?" I ended up putting on a bunny outfit.
And some clear heels. I set my camera up, started recording and started my music.
____
Y/n slow walked to the pole grabbing it and walking around it. Then she jumped a little putting one leg the pole and leaning back while turning one leg and one arm holding onto the pole.
_____
Y/n ended in a split at the bottom of the pole. She the paused the music and stopped the recording.
*Incoming call from Taleé*
Heyyy Y/n!
Hey Tal
Im good what about you?
Good just a little stressed about work.
We all are right now. With no shows there's not really a lot of income for us.
Yea. Cee told me about that one site called OnlyFans.
Are you gonna do it?
I might im still debating tho and Carlos said it was ok.
DING
Hey Tal im gonna call you back.
Ok talk to you later babe.
*call ended*
I threw on some sweats and a white tee and walked to my door slightly opening it to a red haired male standing outside heavily breath. "Dud- oh shit im sorry i think have the wrong apartment." He said. I noticed that he was bleeding from his side. "Its o- hey are you ok?" I yelled as the male fell to the ground.
Not having enough time to pull him into the apartment. I quickly knelt down next to him and hovered my hands over his wound.
White speckles formed around us forming a shield. Making us invisible to the human eye.
___
The male's eye fluttered open realizing he was in a unknown room. He was laying in a soft bed under a weighted cover. "Wait my clothes." He whispered.
The boy got from under the cover noticing he had on some black sweat pants that fit perfectly. He walked out the dark room with his guard up not knowing where he was. He heard music coming from a room which had colorful lights beaming out of it.
As he got closer to the door he could clearly hear what the song was saying "yea, I just might be a hoe." He heard a voice sing along with the music.
"Oh Hey, your woke." The girl said before he could get close to the door. "I know that your a hero red riot but can I get your actual name since ya know...I saved your life."
"You did? And is this your house?" He said. "Yes now name?" "Ok it's Ejirou Kirishima. Just call me Kirishima though." Kirishima says. Y/n nodded her head "My name is y/n." She continued and walked past him to the kitchen. "Hungry?"
"Uh yes kinda." Kirishima continued to look around the apartment. "Want a tour?" "Huh?" "I said do you want a tour of the apartment." Y/n repeated.
"Uh sure but did you happen to see my phone in my hero suit?" Kirishima asked "Yes its in the room you were in."
"Thanks." Kirishima said walking to go get his phone.
*10 missed calls*
5 unread messages
Bakubro💪: WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU SHITTY HAIR!
Bakubro💪: DAMMIT KIRI YOU BETTER NOT HAVE GOTTEN CAPTURED.
Bakubro💪: ANSWER MY DAMN TEXT.
Kirishima: Sorry Bakubro I went to the wrong place and passed out from blood loss but when I woke up I was healed and in someone's house.
Bakubro: Its about time you answered. Send me your location im coming to you.
Kirishima: ok *location*
*Two unread messages*
Karma.: Kiri are you ok. Bakugo told me you weren't answering.
Karma.: Kirishima. This is serious just answer me this one time. for bakugo.
Kirishima❤️: im ok and i already texted Bakugo
Karma.: ok thank you babe💗.
*read*
___
Kirishima scoffs. "was she really his last resort or did she just know because of her quirk." He said to himself before coming out of the room. "Ok you can start." " ok this is the kitchen..obviously."
"This is nice." Kirishima said. "Thank you. Now heres the living room."
"Mmm." "Ok, so of course the room you were in."
"Mhm." "Guest bathroom."
"When we are done you can shower and have not there is clothes the will probably fit you in the closet in the room. Follow me up the stairs."
Kirishima makes a "o" with his mouth as we go up the stairs to my room and bathroom. "My room."
"And you live by yourself?" Kirishima asked. "Kinda. My friend stays over a lot so the guest room is kind of her room." "Mhm." "My bathroom."
"You must really love marble walls." Kirishima said with a small chuckle. "Yea."
"What about the room you were in earlier?" He asked. "Oh that, its nothing just chill room." "Can i see it?" "He Uhh.."
*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK*
"OPEN UP RIGHT NOW UNKNOWN BASTARD!"
Y/n looked a Kirishima with an irritated look. "Do you know who that is?" Y/n said walking down the stairs. "Uh yea thats my best friend he's also a hero."
"He seems like a fucking hothead. He got issues?" Y/n said. Kirishima nodded "ok" y/n says swinging the front door open. "Would you keep it the fuck down other people live in this fucking building." Y/n said. The man looked in amusement. "W-WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU TALKING TO!" He yelled again. Y/n look him in his eyes and shut the door.
She turn to a surprised Kirishima. "I'll show the room if you tell your guard dog to back down." Y/n said. "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU SAY EXTRA!" The male yelled through the door.
"Ok."
Kirishima opens the door. "Bakugo calm down. She saved my life." Bakugo rolled his eyes and walked in taking his shoes off. "Need some water or tea after all that yelling?" The girl said. "I'll take some water." Bakugo said. "There's some room temp waters in the counter and cold ones in the fridge. I recommend the warm ones to ease the pain."
Y/n motioned for Kirishima to follow her. "Ok. I don't really care if you judge me it's just a at home hobbie.
(I depth about the room. Its like this but smaller and it has more lights and a pole i front of a mirror. There are silks and the hoops but its only one of each. Also theres a curtain in between that side and a side with a small couch and a desk with a computer and etc.)
"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU." Y/n yelled. Bakugo looked scared. "YOU CANT JUST GO OPENING SHIT YOU HAVE NO BUSINESS OPENING STUPID MOTHERFUCKER!" "I-I'm sorry."
"don't apologize. just leave. Kirishima you hero outfit is in the closet in the guest room." Y/n said in a calm voice.
____
"Hey y/n can i get you number before I-" Kirishima was cut off by a piece of paper being shoved at his chest. "Here."
"Thank you." Kirishima said walking to the door. "Thank you for saving me."
1437 words
Yooo. Next chapter date is TBD.
•Y/n doesn't want many people to know her past. Only Cearia, Carlos, and Santana know.
•When Bakugo saw y/n his heart kinda fluttered but he didn't know what to do so he kept yelling.
•y/n has a second quirk that almost lost control after what Bakugo did.
Fav emoji? Heres mine 😗.
✰L O V E Y A B E B E S✰
#mha kirishima#mha x reader#kirishima eijirou#kirishima x you#kirishima x y/n#bnha kirishima#bnha eijiro kirishima
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part one 🍒
Todomomo
I think they would be that TikTok couple where the girl is dancing and then the boy slowly comes up and wraps his arms around her and kisses her with the music still playing.
They were voted hottest TikTok couple.
Momo tried the “play this with your boyfriend around audio” and long story short Todoroki burnt her phone.
Todoroki has his profile picture as him and Momo in some glasses flashing a stack of money.
It was a joke at first but he ended up never changing it.
Todoroki would make a post about zooning out and day dreaming about Momo being a “good girl” and asking for more
Momo dueted it and said “zooning out and day dreaming about when he tells you that its not ever yet.”
Todoroki was the first to do the “You look so sexy, you really turn me on videos with your S/O.
He would take the video of Momo as shes getting ready looking all sexy like she is
And she starts talking about their cats bowel movements and he starts laughing cause the audio hits “you look so sexy.” And her eyes widen and shes giggling.
He then spins her close to him and whsipers “You really turn me on, blow my mind everytime.” And she just giggles louder and blushes.
That got like 3 million views.
“I have a boyfriend.” “No my boyfriend crazy, he kill people.”
Izuocha
Uraraka would do silly cute videos
Deku would NOT thirst trap
....on purpose
THEY ARE THE COUPLE TO DO THE “this my baby, and aint NO BODY FINNA touch him.
Uraraka would do lots of cosplay videos.
Her and Deku would do couple cosplay all day long.
They may or may not beg Kiribaku and Seromina to joing them.
Uraraka does that audio where it’s “AND WHY AREN’T YOU IN UNIFORM” in her school clothes, she exits the screen and comes back in with a maid outfit with her fingers doing this. 👉🏽👈🏽
Deku would spend at least two hours replying to the “Damn she bad” “She know what she doin” comments with “Yeah she is :)” “You should see her without the outfit.”
He would do a video with negative and jealous comments about his relationship/ Uraraka with “Bitch I know you sad I know you mad I know you pissed off.” Only he would censor the bad words.
They are that couple that do the whole stand on their back thing and they have to keep getting up till the other person is standing on their shoulders.
Uraraka would dress up in some dark cosplay and lip sync “Do you know who the fuck you’re talkin to?’ audio.
That’s it. Just imagine how hot that’d be.
Her favorite audio is “make his pockets hurt”
Kirbaku
They would do the “I am not gay” audio and flash up pis of Uraraka Momo and Mina. Then they would stare at each other as the blank part of the audio plays out and then go. “You know what i am GAY.”
Kirishima would make his caption. “Girls are beautiful tho “
Bakugou would then caption his with “Not as beautiful as my boyfriend tho.”
They delete fetishizing comments so fast!
Love the Fuck Ice song!
I DO NOT CARE HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT BAKUGOU HE THIRST TRAPS!!
They wouldn’t be the BEST dancers....
But their little dance to “Get the Gat” hit different.
Kirishima does that audio that’s like “No need to shout, no need to yell, no need to have a riot. Shut your eyes, take a deep breath.” To him, and he picked him up and threw him across the room.
Kirishima then later dueted Todoroki’s “Thinking about when she..” video with “When he threw you out of anger and you were kinda into it.”
Kaminari did a video of “Tell your beef, if he says he’s got boyfriend. Then tell him I’m scared of him and I aint fuckin vegetarian.” So he dueted it with him holding up beef and bringing Bakugou in the shot, before pushing out of the way and eating the meat.
Then he fort night danced.
Kirishima thinks that jake2r is literally the funniest thing on TikTok
“I can fuck your bitch and fuck your mom and auntie.” Is an audio Bakugou OWNS
Kamijirou
Jirou would post so many videos of her singing
There would be some with Kaminari in the background just walking by with a dumb smile on his face.
He would then duet it and dance to her singing and do stupid TikTok dances to her voice with a caption. “That’s my baby! Yessir!”
Adding onto the “Fuck Ice” song, Jirou made her own punk version.
With proper credit of course.
On god Denki would try so hard to get her to do the couple audios with him.
CEO of the “Heart been broke so many times” Audio.
Kaminari would do a “Day one of trying to get my girlfriend to dance with me.” To literally any popular dance.
He got her drunk one time and she did it.
DENKI SINGS “Come on fuck me emo boy.” TO HER ALL THE TIME AND SHE HAS TO TRY HER HARDEST NOT TO LAUGH
Like literally most of the videos in that audio is them two ranging from her being mad, her laughing, her not showing any care, and one of her vibing.
One time he left town and couldn’t do it in person so he did so with a bunch of pictures of her.
Jirou posts video’s of her getting ready to the “I’m your DAD!” audio and she actually screams and Denki runs in scared.
Asaf and Frank are his favorite TikTokers
Seromina
Sero is a dumb stoner gamer TikToker.
Mina is THE TikTok dancer.
She INVENTED throwing it back!
She can also rap every single Nikki Minaji song perfectly.
She would shake her ass to “Don’t drop that dun dun dun”
Like she would go ham.
And Sero would be on a trip out of town watching it and all he could duet it with was his jaw hanging open and water coming out of his mouth like drool.
He would nearly be crying at the beauty he snagged.
Caption would be “Ya’ll wanna know how fast I can run?”
Sero invented the “I’m already tracer” meme.
Mina did a collab with the “Hit or miss girl” and they’re best friends.
“I’m a savage, classy bouige, ratchet.” She owns that audio.
Sero makes fun of all the E boys who say the N word.
Sero is somewhere between an E boy and an anti E boy.
Co CEO of “Heart been broke so many times” Audio.
“What you doin out here with all that ass?” Is another favorite of Sero’s
Sero would get ripped before “I don’t get it, it’s says it’s four for four dollars. No one said anything about tax.” While Mina tries to make breakfast in the background and he fortnight dances.
Sero WORSHIPS the ground Cody Ko and Noel Miller walk on
GROUP HEADCANNONS
Mina and Momo collab the most out of the four girls
Bakugou post a video of that audio thats like “Jack i want you to paint me like this” And he’s jack all smooth and sexy
Kaminari then duets it in full sloth costume.
Kirishima duets it laughing his ass off.
Bakugou and Momo do the song together that’s like “I think y’all could use some tips. I’m skinny, I’m winning, and all you bitches are ugly. All the guys in my phone are ugly and fat so don’t call me.” With the camera shaking over to Todoroki eating soba minding his own damn business and the back to Bakugou with “All these bitches on my dick, they giving me head in the lobby” And at that exact moment Kirishima walks by and he grabs the back of his head and bobs it.
He is very confused and can only laugh and mutter an “OW!”
That video got 5 million likes.
They all do their own version of “Tell me about your schools biggest controversy with this audio.
Jirou’s is just “Mineta”
Kaminari and Kirishima would re create the audio in person.
Mina would get Todoroki, Deku and Kaminari together and lip sync “I am not gay, but lets be precise.” You could see Sero in the background mouthing “Liar.” Mina would push him out of the shot trying to finish the line “cause if she’s pretty than watch her cause ima be fuckin ya wife.”
They girls would do a really fast paced TikTok to “Ms. Hilton you must be worth a trillion bucks “ With Mina lip syncing that while pulling her sunglasses down to look at Momo walk by.
Then it would turn to Urarka who goes “Get the feelin that you don’t really give a” And then Jirou would come in clutch with the censoring and play her guitar on the “fuck” so Uraraka doesn’t cuss because she is baby.
Deku and Todoroki do the “Who are you?” “Maaaaan I be that pretty mother fucker man.”
Todoroki is the pretty mother fucker.
I’m gonna say that Kirishima, Sero, and Kaminari do the “Well, can you tell which one of us is Hikaru?” audio, with the caption when we ask who’s the biggest dumbass, and when it turns to he Haruhi part its literally everyone saying the “thats the dumbest game I’ve ever heard”
#todomomo#izuocha#seromina#kamijirou#momo x todoroki#todoroki x momo#izuku x uraraka#uraraka x izuku#uraraka x deku#uraraka x midoriya#midoriya x uraraka#sero x mina#mina x sero#kaminari x jirou#denki x jirou#jirou x kaminari#jirou x denki#denki x kyouka#kyouka x denki#kyouka x kaminari#kaminari x kyouka#kiribaku#bakugou x kirishima#kirishima x bakugou#mha#my hero academia#my hero academia headcanons#bmha#boku no hero academia#boku no hero academia headcannons
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enemies to lovers! jisung
summary: fights about everything between both of you; homework, disaster, and dancing but what happens when the dance team celebrates with a masquerade party and it leads both of you to fall in love with eachother accidentally?
genre: fLuFf, a fancy party, highschool, pOpularity(?)
a/n: y’all,, this series was great i cry
m.list
~
aHem
jisung is known for two (2) things
A) knowing to hang out with upperclassmen which include the dreamies who are fu ck bois
or B) a gREAT dancer and TALENT eVERYWHERE
anyways you and jisung hate eachother jUst because y’all wanted that top spot in the dancing team,, guess who came in first? jisung
obviously because whO doesn’t swoon for the cutest guy at dance class??
plus popularity does come in handy sIke we all know that boy is multitalented and doesn’t need popularity
so both of you fight aboUt anything and when i say anything I MEAN EVERYTHING
who dances to kpop FasT? who fools the teacher the fastest? who makes the loudest sneeze?? i could gO ON
and the dreamies are just like ???? what is going on???
mark: both of you are seriously crazy
haechan: nah they’re insane
renjun: someone help them???
jaemin: theylikeeachothertheydo
chenle: betbetbetbet
jeno: i’ll give it 3 weeks
3 wEeks later and y’all still up each others throats
jeno, chenle, jaemin: we were wrong
renjun, mark, hyuck: well no shit they look like they’re about to MURDER EACHOTHER
but everyone thinks y’all are dating but at the same time not??? so it goes like this: either you’re dating him or you’re supposedly jealous of him
aND since you’re not,,, well, everyone steals him from you
thats also one thing he is good at; making peoples hearts flutter AMIRITE HE STOLE MINE WITH HIS CUTE ASS SMILE-
maybe not yours yet bUT he bets you that you can’t make a single person fall for you IN A DAY and then you bet him that he can’t actually spend a day caring about someone without flirting and playing them
sO bOTH OF YOU TRY YOUR BEST
and iN THAT WEEK your dance team was hosting a masquerade party bITCH IM A SUCKER FOR THOSE EVEN THO IVE NEVER GONE TO ONE THEY SOUND SO FANCY since iTS THAT TIME FOR PARTY TIMEEEE
so then you’re like,, THATS MY CHANCE
and you tell your friends
and jisung tells the dreamies
and you wear the perfect outfit that matches your deep scarlet mask with black feathers and gold jewels and iT mAKes yOU LOOK sO good
anyways your friends were sHOOK
and everyone at the party wAS shOOK too
even though no one could tell who you are since the lights were dim and dark
the dreamies saw you and were like wHo is that??? and jisung thought you were the PERFECT target
so jisung swoops in and stands right next to you and whispers “would you like to dance with me?”
and yOu arE blushing because 1) he looks like a cute dude and 2) you’re about to win the bet
and you nod with the biggEST smile on your face and he just dances so smooth??? like he literally just knows what he’s doing??
aNd hE is surprised?? because this stranger he just met dances so well????
and after the song ends both of you go outside and talk
“a pretty great dance huh?” he said
you: “hmm indeed it was,, are you in the dance team?”
“how about we reveal ourselves at the end of the night if you think we can be friends?” or more than that? is what jisung thought since he needed to WIN the bet
you agreed and thought this was gonna be really easy and you felt yourself falling for this dude you just met???
and he does too???
like even though you can’t see him he has a cute smile and such a down to earth person???
and he thinks he’s going crazy or it’s just the lights since he sees your eyes sparkle and he finds you cute
and the night goes pretty quickly for both of you since you both spend it together just getting to know each other
and it’s about to be midnight and jisung thinks its the perfect time to reveal each other
and you think you just fell in love with someone you don’t know who it is
“okay,, so should we reveal ourselves??” you said nErvOuslY
and he just nods
y’all count 3
2
1
“JISUNG??!!!” “Y/N?!?!?”
“WHAT THE HELL JISUNG? HOW DID I NOT KNOW IT WAS YOU??”
“i mean i’m good at disguising bUT HOW THE HELL DID I NOT KNOW IT WAS YOU??” - jisung
“can we uhhh forget about this??pLEASE?” - you
“I HAVE A BET TO WIN??” - jisung
you: “WE BOTH LOST??”
“that doesn’t change the fact that i like you,,”
“i can’t believe i’m saying this but i like you too, idiot”
“ITS YOUR FAULT FOR FALLING FOR ME FIRST?”
anyways both of you agree into terms to date each other secretly
the dreamies didnt know for 2 weeks
until jisung left for a date
and they were following him for fun
and tHey saw you and got sHOOK
“oHMYGOD THEY ARE DATING!!” - jeno, chenle, jaemin
“can y’all shut up we’re gonna get caught” - mark, renjun, haechan
anYwhOs now that the dreamies found oUt tEASING JISUNG 24/7
and you find it cute when he gets shy
dAnCE COUPLE!!!
jisung is more confident when it comes to dances so its easy for him to be a smooth bf
and you’re like “wOw evEryONe LOOK AT MY MAN1!1!1!”
everyone is jEaLoUs since both of you aRe cUTE
jisung lets you borrow his hoodies but doesn’t admit that you look fluffy and cute
the amount of cuTenEss in the relationship
you kiss jisungs cheeks since he gets flustered
one time you kissed his nose and he just f r oz e in place
tHAT BOY IS SO SHYYY but he likes it when you give him kisses
in conclusion,,, love him forever
#nct#nct dream#park jisung#nct fluff#nct imagines#nct scenarios#nct 2018#nct u#nct 127#nct x reader#zhong chenle#na jaemin#huang renjun#lee donghyuck#lee jeno#mark lee#kpop fluff#kpop scenarios#kpop imagines#kpop#masquerade PaRtiEs sOUND FANCY AND OUUU#i LOVE THIS MAN#AHHHHHHHHDJD#Im gonna miss this series :(((#thise series was fun and i loved it ;-;
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when you were first getting into art, what and how did you draw? (like did you just doodle ur masterpieces on pieces of paper and posted-notes or did you have a proper sketchbook) how did you find motivation? bc ive been trying to draw but I always get unmotivated and stop while still wanting to get better just by doing nothing.
REALLY LONG, LOTS OF ADVICES FOR ARTISTS :
TL;DR ; skip to the HOW TO ACTUALLY FUCKING DRAW part bc i have a megaton of shit to say lol + The MOTIVATION part
mmh… I’ll get into details with this one tbh bc it’s a long ass process ahah :
I live by the sea ; when i was youung i used to draw TONS of boat, but like, dollhouse boats, you could see the insides and stuff ; i loved to add tiny details and stuff, and imbricate everything together !
around 8 or 9 yo, i went to the public library with school and discovered the wonderful world of mangas ! I basically… Copy pasted an entire Mermaid Melody tome x)
For about 2 years i alternated between reading mangas and trying to copy them ! Then i just kept drawing in the margins of my schoolwork for about… 5 years ! I have a Fuck Ton of sketchbooks of that time, it was… The start. Lol. Never say it’s bad because it’s never bad, just not there yet !!
Around my 13 yo, i went every saturday, for two years, under a bookstore ; there was a cave, and drawing classes ; that teacher was mean and harsh and stuff, but like… Not really. He would take away my eraser for the class, force me to use pencil, to draw something else (bulky boys instead of magical girls).
I’ve learned a lot, more in terms of How To LEARN to draw than to draw itself, but i still progressed a LOT !!
Then i kept drawing by myself for a year and i really worked hard on it ; about hours a day, trying watercolors and stuff ; i have a real problem with colors in traditionnal art, but i’m much better with lines (i should scan some RAD stuff i made in the weekend, yall ive never done anything this good i stg i dont know why i always forget im so much better on paper)
This gets us to my sweet 16 ; i have to year of advance, bc i got ‘’’promoted’’’ idk how to say it ; anyways, i entered my (current) animation school for the first year at 16; vERY IMPRESSIVE AND TERRIFYING.
And i learned. A fuckmegaton. Of shit there.
Now i’m going for my third year there and i can make photorealistic marmora blades and cyberkpunk decors if i want to and that’s rad, but here is
HOW TO ACTUALLY FUCKING DRAW :
I have one HYPER important advice, and i’m keeping it to heart since i’m like, 11 : Have. Sketchbooks. Please !!! It’s very important. Here’s why :
You keep everything with you in one place. You have 1 sketchbook, it’s basically easy to take every where (a A5, or A4 are pretty easy to carry, i have like, 12 of those, and around 8 of A3)
You keep track of what you’ve done. It’s super important, bc first you can cry of laughter at your old stuff bc its cute but not so good, and second, you can just be like ‘holy mama’ and see how much you’ve improved
It’s very important to be organized. I WORK in art, and trust me, if there’s something that i’ve learned this year through tears and missing files and bugs : Be. Impeccable. Now if it’s for fun, go a little loose, and just have a folder for art on your computer, and a sketchbook, no need to stress, but the better you try to keep a record of where is what, the better you’ll see whats wrong
Notebooks are friends !! You can draw, write, glue stuff, make notes, lists, everything !!! I have my life in those. It’s more important to me than any of my phones.
Be proud of it. Like, not everything, duh ! But try to tell yourself than it’s like a RPG ; even if it’s only 2 xp here and there, one day you’ll beat level 40, and that’s super important : art is. Fuckin. Long.
I cant stress it enough. It’s soooo long !!! SO LONG !! it’s years. It’s like karate and fishing and ANYTHING. To be good at it, it takes time, but it WILL COME if you keep trying. There’s no secret passage.
You’re gonna me it, believe in me who believes in you.
Use. References.
Coming from a little shit who’s got a really good visual memory, that can sound like bs, but i stg everything is always AT LEAST twice as good if you’ve used a visual support.
I’m not saying COPY EVRYTHING (even though thats a good training) I’m saying, if you really want to do that asian tiger, please have at least two or three pictures of it nearby. Take photos of your hands, and stuff !
Make it harder.
No eraser.
Paint.
I draw all my backgrounds on my sketchbook with INDIAN INK; no returns, no refunds.
Ink, Ink, INK !! Don’t allow mistakes.
And if you make mistakes :
New page, restart
It’s okay
It’s for you
I once started back again a whole EXAM bc it was bad, i got one of my best grades
You’ll improve and be more assured if you know you just have to DO IT. Trust me. It’s VISIBLE; if you can erase, you fidget and hesitate and ‘’kbeujebez hahhaaa idkkidsd’’ ; stop ; do it, and if you don’t like it ? Try again, there’s no time limit
Draw as large as you can
There’s no interesting story here, it just helps. Bigger movement of the hand, more place for details, breathing lines
Thin lineart helps
Thinner. Make it even thinner
Break the rules, but not the ones that structure your art
Big lineart ? Why not
Unfinished lines, vaporeous colors ? Pretty
Cubism is actually based on extensive and intense practice of classical art, it’s not wibbly wooblly ; the anatomy is more correct than you think
Structure and composition are important, but so is movement and life ; choose your fighter ; mine is fluidity and fun, i’m like, a rogue/archer in drawing. Some people are dwarf fighter. That’s amazing and great.
Don’t be afraid to do nothing
Pages and pages of my sketchbooks are actually just lance facing right and smiling, you know…
Sometimes it just doesnt work : two ways :
Take a break, Kiki’s delivery service style
Keep trying, break your art until it obeys and comes back
Take breaks. Breath.
Don’t compare. I do it, it doesn’t help at all. You’ll make it ; and if you compare, keep in mind that everyone’s different
I’m not gonna lie, it’s NOT easy, it’s even hard
But I really, really think it’s worth it
MOTIVATION :
My main bitch
I’m always pumped for art because i can LITTERALLY NOT do anything else ; i love reading and writing and stuff but at the end of the day i just want !!! to draw !!!! aaaaaa-
Fall in love with it, and with the possibilities ; i have stories to tell, tell me yours ! Do your best, one day it WILL work
Actual advices :
I have an inspiration blog where i just reblogs stuff i like to draw them later
Find a picture, copy it. Do it again. Change the characters (i have 2 ocs and Lance and Keith as default characters) in the pic.
Like an artstyle ? Break it to its very core, analyse it, copy it, redo it, trace it and ABSORB it. Don’t copy/past, LEARN from your heroes.
Do what you like. I have 86578 pieces of voltron, this is not a coincidence. I have ENDLESS ideas for this show, wtf.
Try new things. Buy indian ink im begging you. It’s so cool.
Have a game with yourself, or a challenge. STICK TO IT.
Study. When you’re bored, usually it’s because you’re stagnating. Make it harder or do hands until you cry.
Love your backgrounds; make backgrounds, study trees, and tokyo streets, and venice’s bridges. Decor is just as cool as characters, if not more
Mess a little with everything. My roomate more than one found me stained from head to toes trying to DO STUFF
Draw outfits. Draw what you want but can’t afford
MAKE YOUR LIFE A COMIC. Remember those sketchbooks ? Make a comic a week/month/every full moon, whatever, and draw your life (mine’s the roomates au lol)
Prompts blogs are cool too
Make fanart of a fic you liked ; you have the characters and the pose already, you just have to illustrate ; double bonus, you probably will make a writer’s day, if not year !
That little movie that plays when you listen to your favorite song ? DRAW IT
Your favorite scene in your favorite movie ? Redraw each shot. On post it. Plus it looks awesome afterwards to have the infamous TREX scene of Jurassic Parks in post it
Get bored. That’s inevitable. Dance, scream, get back to it. Walk, draw everything you see.
Make a paper google map street view : Take a walk : every 50 meters, draw what is in front of you.
Snapchats your friends. Draw their snapchats when they answer
Draw maps. Invent places. Invent bikes, and hovercrafts, and monsters. Make your everyday inventory. Make your life a video game, and do the concept arts of it.
FETCH your inspiration. I have approx. 20 artbooks, full of drawings and concept arts of my fave movies/games ; take what you like and add it to the story you have since you’re 8. We all have one.
Ask for it ; your sis, your mom, me even ! If you dont have ideas, someone will have them.
WELL i’m gonna stop there, even though i got like, 9864567 more to say, but with this you should be fine ! Anon, i’m rooting for you ! we all start somewhere, just hold on!!!!
#Anon you'll do it !!!!!!!!!!#asked#artist advice#art#i put my heart in this omg#it's 1.5 K WORDS#wtf#but yeah#you just gotta do shit and mess around
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The Least I Can Do (Part 3)
Summary: Jensen takes the reader on their second date where she experiences her first con...
Part 1 Part 2
Pairing: Jensen x reader
Word Count: 3,100ish
Warnings: language
A/N: They just keep getting longer somehow...
“Morning sunshine,” said Jensen when you opened your door, a small carry on by his feet.
“Morning,” you said, waving him in. “There’s coffee if you want some.”
“Already made some,” he said, holding up a thermos. “You ready to go?”
“You texted me like three minutes ago saying to pack some clothes and whatever stuff I wanted,” you said, walking past your couch and into your bedroom where your empty backpack sat on the unmade bed.
“Was that not enough time?” he teased.
“Do I need a dress? Nice shoes? A parka? I need to know what this con weekend thing is. Or where it even is,” you said.
“Are you that obsessed with clothes?” he asked and you scowled. Oh, if there was one stereotype you hated as much as the sleeping around underwear model it was the superficial clothes and makeup obsessed thing. “Y/N, relax. It was a joke.”
“Maybe I shouldn’t go,” you said. “We really don’t know much about each other and-”
“If you don’t want to go, then that’s fine. But please don’t change your mind because I tried to tease you and touched a nerve. I don’t think you care about name brands and crap like that really,” he said.
“So,” you said giving him a smile. “Jeans and tees?”
“That’ll be fine. We’re going to a concert tonight too,” he said and you raised an eyebrow.
“Okay, give me ten minutes?” you asked and he smiled, pulling your door shut before you stopped him. “I’m not worried about you seeing my underwear drawer.”
“I don’t want to see my presents early,” he said with a smirk.
“Oh don’t try this cocky flirting game with me Ackles. You’re gonna lose,” you said, watching him hold up his hands.
“I’ll behave for the foreseeable future,” he said. “Let me know when you’re ready to go.”
“Alright. Oh and Jensen?” you asked, watching him whip his body around after heading into your living room. “How much do I owe you for the plane ticket and hotel and stuff?”
“Nothing,” he said. “I didn’t have to pay for it so don’t argue that you should have to.”
“Wait, this is a show thing?” you asked. He nodded as he sat down. “Awesome.”
“Awesome?” he asked, crossing his arms.
“I may or may not have binged like four episodes last night...” you said, walking back into your room to pack.
“So, are you a Sam or Dean girl?” he asked.
“What’s that?” you asked.
“Which one are you attracted to,” he said, a laugh in his words. “I’ve got an idea.”
“Oh, I like John,” you said. “He’s got that hot older guy thing going on.”
“You realize I’m currently older than he was when the show started, right?” asked Jensen.
“You’ve got that hot older guy thing going on ya know,” you said, popping your head out the door with a smirk. “Although you were an adorable baby boy back then. Your voice was so much higher.”
“Is this that flirty tease thing I’m getting now?” he asked. “I’ll give it right back sweetheart.”
“That’s a very Dean thing to say,” you said, walking into your closet and pulling on your airport outfit. A pair of leggings, the first tee in sight and a light hooded jacket. You slipped on your throw away shoes, the ten dollar sneakers that you didn’t give a crap about but held up amazingly well and threw your hair back in a ponytail. You tossed a pair of jeans, three shirts, pajama shorts, some underwear and your to go zip up with all your personal care crap in it. You quickly grabbed headphones, charger and a book before you were zipping it up.
“That was fast,” he said when you walked out after only a few minutes. “You sure you don’t want your laptop?”
“We’ll be busy probably,” you said. You glanced over to your dinner table covered with a few sheets of paper and your computer.
“True. Okay. Everything off, and-”
“I have travelled before,” you said, walking over to your thermostat and turning it down.
“Thankfully it’s not across country today. Only a couple hours down to Arizona,” he said, stepping out before you so you could lock up behind you.
“You still haven’t told me about what a con is Ackles,” you said, testing your door before walking with him.
“If you’re already binging the show, you’re going to have fun.”
“What?” you asked the front desk when you were checking into your hotel early that afternoon.
“We never received a request for a second room. Unfortunately we’re booked up,” they said and you sighed before heading over to where Jensen was talking to Jared in the lobby, waiting to go up to their rooms.
“Um, they don’t have a room for me,” you said, looking out the front doors. “I can try the hotel across the street.”
“Seriously?” said Jared. “They normally don’t screw up stuff like that.”
“I’ll bunk with Jared and you can have my room,” said Jensen, offering a smile. Jared seemed okay with that but you definitely weren’t.
“It’s your room, you should keep it,” you said.
“I mean, you guys could share too. Not like you’re dating or anything...” said Jared, bumping his arm into Jensen.
“It hasn’t even been 24 hours,” said Jensen.
“I’m okay with sharing. We wanted to spend more time with each other. That’s the reason I came in the first place, right?” you asked.
“If he annoys the crap out of you just kick him out and send him to my room,” said Jared, patting your on the back. “Want to meet up in a few hours and grab dinner?”
“Sounds good to me,” you said. “Apparently there’s a concert tonight he’s taking me to so we should be back in time for that.”
“Yeah. I’m sure that’ll be fun for you,” said Jared, sharing some sort of silent look with Jensen. “Later guys.”
“What was that about?” you asked. Jensen threw his arm over your shoulders and started leading you over to the elevators. For a moment you forgot all about the conversation were absolutely focused on all the warm muscle around you.
“Y/N? Hello?” he asked, waving a hand in front of your face. Whoops.
“Um, sorry, zoned out. What’d you say?” you asked, Jensen’s arm moving away to press your floor button and you wished he’d put it back.
“I may or may not be part of the concert tonight. I haven’t decided yet,” he said. You tilted your head up at him to see his green eyes staring back.
“Yes you have you little flirt,” you said.
“I have to make you think I’m cooler than I actually am. I’ll use this to my advantage in any way possible,” he said, bumping into you playfully.
“Right, because tall blonde and handsome isn’t cool,” you teased. Jensen was about to spout off something flirty back but a hand caught the closing doors and his arm quickly fell away. Two young women around your age stepped in, their eyes a little wide. He must not have wanted to draw any attention to you yet.
“Hi,” one of them said to Jensen.
“Hi,” he said back. “You guys here for the con?”
“Yeah, it’s our first one,” said the other women. Jensen seemed genuinely happy as you realized they were both a little nervous to be near him.
“Y/N’s too,” he said, pointing at you. “What floor you guys on?”
“Fifth,” they said, Jensen hitting the button for them.
“Are you going to sing at the concert tonight?” one asked as they got to their floor.
“I was planning on it. Have fun this weekend,” he said, returning the wave they gave him as they slipped out.
“You handled that really well,” you said when you were alone. He shrugged.
“I’m used to it. Most people are super nice. We don’t really do bad stuff or get in trouble so no one bothers us on a day to day basis. No one follows me around or takes my picture. I’m boring. This is the most attention I get really,” he said.
“I like that about you. You’re normal,” you said.
“Let’s see how this weekend goes first and see if I’m worth keeping around.”
“Hey,” said Jensen, hopping backstage after finishing up a song, covered in a thin layer of sweat. “Having fun?”
“I wish you could have seen the exact moment her jaw dropped,” said Jared with a laugh.
“Oh my...you’re like fucking amazing,” you said, not sure where to look at him first. “You look like a rockstar and sound like one and play guitar, not to mention all the acting stuff and-”
“Told you I had to make myself seem cool,” he said, grabbing a drink of water.
“Mission accomplished,” you said, still in awe over him.
“I wonder how long that’ll last,” said Jared, Jensen whacking him with his bottle. “Hey, you got to tease the shit out of me when Gen and I got together. Payback’s a bitch.”
“I was totally in favor of you guys!” said Jensen. “I didn’t do it the second day you knew Gen.”
“I’m making up for lost time,” said Jared. “I mean, I don’t see you saying anything to Y/N for saying how cute your butt looks in those jeans.”
“Jared! You were sworn to secrecy,” you said, slapping his arm.
“I need protection from you two,” he joked. “Besides, we don’t have secrets in this family.”
“He’s right. We don’t. Seriously though, you think I have a cute butt?” asked Jensen with a wink.
“Your cool guy factor is going down you realize,” you said, crossing your arms.
“Twenty seconds. That was longer than I thought,” said Jared, standing and stretching.
“Shudyup,” said Jensen. You listened to a few more songs before the show ended and you stood up to head back to your room. “Woah, where do you think you’re going?” he asked, catching your arm.
“Bed?” you said back.
“If you want to we can. Or we can go out for a few hours,” he said.
“I’m game. Not sure about an old timer like yourself,” you said, Jared raising his eyebrows as Jensen squinted.
“Oh, we’ll see about that.”
“Why is your alarm going off. We went to bed three hours ago,” you groaned.
“Sorry. Morning panel,” he said, his voice thick with sleep but willing himself to get up from the other side of the bed. “You can go back to bed if you want and just see the afternoon one.”
“No, I wanna,” you mumbled, stretching out and slumping back into bed.
“Sure about that?” he asked, pulling off his shirt and walking to the bathroom.
“I’m sure,” you said. You flashed open your eyes and quickly shut them before your eyes started wandering all over him. “Why are you so perfect?”
“I’m really not,” he said. “Something’s obviously not right.”
“Hm?” you asked, sitting up and opening your eyes.
“Forget it. I’ll shower quick then you can have it. Panel starts at 8,” he said.
“Jensen?” you asked. You watched him take a long sip from his coffee just before his and Jared’s panel was supposed to start.
“This one is only thirty minutes or so. Then we can grab breakfast,” he said, offering a smile.
“You just didn’t meet the right person,” you said, his smile falling away. “I don’t think you should feel bad about not having met that person yet.”
“I didn’t say any of that,” he said.
“You didn’t need to,” you said.
“Hopefully I finally met her. Even if she thinks I’m old,” he said, Jared rolling his eyes behind him, mouthing ‘idiot’ at him. “What is Jared doing?” he asked, turning around in his seat to see Jared walking away.
“Oh, just being a good friend,” you said. “Come on, I want to see my first panel.”
“This one is smaller so it’s a good place to start I hope,” said Jensen, standing and holding out a hand for you. You followed until someone pointed out where you could go so you could sneak into the audience. You were surprised at how informal the whole process was, how a simple question led to a story and then another but somehow they always seemed to stay on track. You found yourself wanting more by the time it was over.
“You two are adorable,” you said to the guys when you saw them after they’d finished. “No wonder you play such good brothers.”
“We spend a lot of time together. As you can tell by how much Jared’s been hanging out on our second date,” said Jensen. Jared didn’t take offense and asked if you’d met any of the other people at the con yet. “We’ve been hanging out so not really.”
“Do it before we head home. Everyone’s interested in meeting your new girlfriend,” said Jared.
“I haven’t even asked that yet,” said Jensen, his face heating up the more Jared teased.
“Jared, can you give us a minute?” you asked. You waited for the two of you to be alone in the hall.
“Thanks,” he said. “I know this is probably overwhelming on it’s own and-”
“Do you want to be my boyfriend?” you asked, looking up at confused green eyes. “Yeah, I was talking to you.”
“This isn’t scary or weird to you?” he asked.
“I like you. You like me. We’ll be going on more dates. I think we check off those criteria for boyfriend and girlfriend,” you said, reaching out and taking one of his large hands in yours.
“You’ve got a point,” he said. “I guess we’re together then.”
“I guess we are,” you said back.
“Can I go show you off to my friends now?” he asked with a smile.
“I’d love to.”
“This weekend was a lot of fun,” you said, yawning as you opened your door to your apartment that night. Jensen nodded and yawned in turn.
“I’m really glad you came,” he said. “Maybe you can come to another one if you want.”
“Uh, duh. Those panels were awesome. I’ve definitely got some catching up to do,” you said, tossing your bag down and walking over to your phone on the wall showing a message.
“You are so going to be a Dean girl,” said Jensen, watching you tilt your head curiously. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” you said. “It’s just I haven’t given out this number in ages. The only people who have it is my modeling agency and even then they always call my cell or email, never this one.”
“Well now I’m intrigued. Let’s take a listen,” he said, walking inside and taking a seat on your kitchen counter.
“Let’s hope it’s fast. Walking Dead comes on in like ten minutes,” you said.
“Do you mind if I hang out and watch with you?” he asked, kicking his feet softly.
“No ya little cutie,” you said with a giggle. “Does someone like that show or something?”
“Yeah. Papa Winchester is on it now so of course I gotta watch,” he said.
“Now that’d be a hell of a crossover,” you said, remembering how to listen to your voicemail. It took a few tries before the message came through.
Hi Y/N. I don’t know if you remember me from Friday. I was the director in that orange baseball hat. I just wanted to say thanks for stepping in and helping us out at the last minute.
“That’s nice of him,” you said, turning to Jensen who looked skeptical.
We saw your resume from your agency and the producing team was wondering if you could stop down Monday at 10. We’re obviously doing this by the seat of our pants but if you could come in and read a few lines just to try for us we’d be forever grateful. Your agency said you just finished a contract and this might be a great opportunity for us all if you’re interested. I understand if you don’t want to, this is pretty far out of your normal realm of work. Thanks again.
“Oh,” you said, turning to look at Jensen.
“It’s your decision, not mine,” said Jensen. “Have you ever acted before?”
“The last acting I did was Girl #4 in my fifth grade play,” you said.
“Do you want to try this?” he asked, offering a soft smile. You had enjoyed the three seconds of doing it before. That really was getting to pretend to be someone else, kind of like when you modeled. But it was different. There was a story to it and you were lying to yourself if you said you didn’t want to at least go and try in the morning.
“Yeah, I do,” you said, nodding your head.
“We’ll watch zombies another night,” he said. “You’ve got other homework tonight,” he said, standing and moving over to your couch.
“What homework?” you asked, watching as he turned on your TV and quickly got into Netflix.
“Supernatural silly. If you’re going to read for Dean’s love interest, you should watch some more of the show,” he said, patting the spot next to him.
“Do you...want me to get this part?” you asked, walking over and joining him.
“I get to act that I’m falling for a girl while I’m actually falling for the girl that plays her? Why would I ever want that?” he teased.
“I guarantee I’m going to be awful at this tomorrow,” you said, feeling his arm wrap around your shoulders, pulling you into him.
“You won’t know if you don’t take a chance,” he said.
“When it comes to you and chances they’ve worked out so far. I guess we see what happens tomorrow,” you said. Jensen kissed the top of your head and your face began to hurt from the wide smile that had formed. At least until you started paying attention to the episode.
“Are those kids playing Bloody Mary? That scared the crap out of me as a kid,” you said, snuggling a little closer to Jensen.
“This one still creeps me out,” he said. “Obviously we should watch with the lights off.”
“If I get nightmares I blame you Ackles,” you said.
“If you get nightmares, just call me and I’ll pop down and sleep on your couch. Make sure nothing bad gets you,” he said, wrapping both arms around you and squeezing you gently.
“You can always just crash here just in case,” you said, letting him decide if he wanted to stay over.
“Good idea,” he said with a nod. “Now we should be quiet seeing as there’s a ridiculously good looking man on the screen,” he said.
“I’ll let Jared know you think so fondly of him,” you said.
“Shudyup and learn how cocky but good of a guy Dean Winchester can be.”
A/N: Read Part 4 here!
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Southern Charm Recap: Flamingo-ing Crazy
Evening, party people. Smiling faces, beautiful places, welcome back to another week of . Lets see what bat shit craziness this week has in store.
Cameran solidifies her role as the unofficial protagonist of the show, narrating the opening sequence (and even saying the word bitch. Well, I do declare!) My familys about to make fun of me for debasing myself by watching this show for yet another week. Suck it, dad, this shits entertaining and makes me feel like a very accomplished adult in comparison to these 35-year-old train wrecks. On a side note, Im kind of getting into this theme song. As an extra side note, my TV is broken and everything is green tinted, which is fitting, I feel.
We open with Thomas on the phone with JD, the former bitching about Kathryn (what else is new?). He rolls up to JDs house and cant even say yes to a cup of coffee without breaking out the French. Ugh, I thought that was a one-episode thing. Thomas apparently told Kathryn he wasnt cosigning her lease (after the whole polo fiasco, if you’ll recall) and she went so nuts that she ended up IN THE HOSPITAL AND MAY HAVE GONE INTO LABOR PREMATURELY. Jesus fucking Christ. So now, what does Thomas do? He agrees to cosign.
JD is like, wait, so you call Kathryn and tell her youre not cosigning, she gets upset, and now youre cosigning anyway because you feel bad for her
JD: I upset my wife plenty of times when she was pregnant but she didnt end up in the hospital over it.
Thomas is like, Wow, everybody was righthomegirl really does know how to manipulate.
Apparently Jennifer is the ultimate shadester, she used to date Thomas and screenshotted everything and sent it to Kathryn just to stir shit up. Taking it a bit far, don’t you think?
Thomas: If I can handle prison for six months, I can handle this bullshit for two more months.
Hold up, like actual prison or just being with Kathryn? Maybe that random Facebook commenter was right and I do need to go back and watch the show from season 1.
Cameran is one of those white people who answers the phone with, Yello! and we promptly learn she was up all night with diarrhea. Gross. Shep goes to watch Craig turn in his application for the bar exam because hes so full of shit that nobody believes him unless they see it with their own eyes. Thats gotta hurt, Craig.
Shep rolls up to good ol Gentry HQ and asks Craig how business is doing. Craig starts talking about some BS I zoned out pretty quick listening to, something about a bourbon side and a hotel side of something.Damn, and youre not gonna let Landon get in on this bourbon business? Thats cold, Craig.
Craig has one more step to nail before he can take the bar, and if he doesnt complete it in time he wont be able to take the test. I feel a setup coming on
These guys are literally arguing over which type of adhesive Craig should use to affix his passport photos to his application.
Cameran meets up with Danni, the roast thief from the earlier episode, and another friend for lunch. One of their friends orders a sweet tea instead of wine and they all jump on her immediately to ask if shes pregnant. Like…a girl can’t order a damn sweet tea in the middle of the day without everyone assuming she’s got a bun in the oven? Cameron is SO OBVIOUSLY not ready to be a mother and these bitches wont leave her the fuck alone about it. Newsflash: This is 2016! Women can aspire to more nowadays than just being a mother. Leave Cameran alone!
Cameran has anxiety too, she reveals, and this show is becoming one giant therapy advertisement. Just goes to show you, money cant solve all your problems. Spinoff idea: What if they all go to the same therapist? Also, Cam’s friend is like, because thats totally a cure for a legitimate mental illness. WTF is wrong with you. What decade do these people live in.
Only 15 minutes in and my fingers are already tired from all this ranting. Gonna be a long episode. Also, wtf happened to Whitney? Is he still alive?
Its finally (almost) time for the flamingo party. Yay! Patricia will be photographing this party for her entertainment book whcih, Im sorry, Im definitely buying. They’re going to have a ros tower and idk what that is, but I know I want one. Patricia is explaining those champagne tower things where you pour the champagne in the top of the pyramid and it spills into all the ones at the bottom and is like, No its not. Its basically 3D beer pong without the balls. Just chill.
Wait ok the Gentry is a hotel?? I feel like an idiot but if they wouldve just explained this shit at the beginning we wouldnt be here. Anyway, Landon and Craig are prepping for the party and going to a spa.
Landon: Part of being a Southern belle is being well-kept, which makes you a good person.
Yeah, maybe on the outside. Im not convinced any of you except Cameran are good people on the inside. And maybeee Craig. He seems pretty earnest.
Craig is aiming for Gatsby-ish pink in terms of outfit color and Landon is like, Im sorry, bitch what? Don’t be over there acting like your Southern asses did not fucking invent salmon pink shorts as a menswear item. Yeah, you THOUGHT you could insult us Yankees.
Jennifer called Craig to let him know Kathryn literally made herself sick and is in the hospital, and he of course feels super bad for her. Meanwhile, Landon does not give one shit!
Landon: Ugh here we go with the drama. People go to the hospital every day. Calm the fuck down.
Okay, people also die everyday, does that make dying any less shitty?
Landon: Did she really almost die? Doubt it. TTYL, DGAF, going to the spa.
Jennifer tells Craig that Thomas didn’t visit Kathryn in the hospital. This detail is important later, so keep it in mind.
Landon: Im tired of Kathryn controlling and manipulating everyone with this child, Im not gonna be manipulated by this psychopath.
Landon literally thinks Kathryn got a slight headache and rushed to the ER. Not sure if this is warranted or not but I’m semi impressed by the fact that she can’t even pretend to be mildly concerned.
We see Kathryn and she explains she basically gave herself such high blood pressure that it affected the baby. IDK how you can personally know what your own blood pressure feels like unless youre constantly taking it, but ok.
Kathryn: All this baby and I need is a stable place to live in a not-stressful environment and if Thomas wont help me get a huge-ass house he doesnt deserve to be in my babys life as far as Im concerned.
Bonus round: Kathryn manipulates Thomas into helping her move, too.
Kathryn: Cosigning on this house is the least he could do for me at this point.
YOU MEAN ASIDE FROM THE LIKE $2500 YOU GET A MONTH? YEAH, I REMEMBER THAT FROM LAST EPISODE, IM NOT A FUCKING IDIOT.
Back at Patricias house where shes still setting up for the flamingo party. God damn, they are milking it.
Patricia: I grew up in the 50s. Mothers wore dresses and high heels and had their hair and makeup done. Ive always maintained you have to put on the dog and try to ge as glamorous as you can.
IDK what putting on the dog means but thats gonna be my next getting ready Instagram caption.
Sligthly disappointed there are no real flamingos at this flamingo party. I was definitely holding out for some exotic birds to be present.
Thomas saying yeah, pop that is the most uncomfortable Ive been all evening, even if they are referring to a bottle of wine.
Thomas is setting Landon up with some dude with a ponytail who I feel like is probably her kryptonite since he seem like the type of dude whod call himself an artist, too. Landon also greets everyone with bonsoir. Can we fucking stop pretending we’re European?
Patricia has a fortune teller at her party. What a rager. I am very sad I did not get an invite. Patricia, if youre reading this, I can clean up really well and I wont get belligerent drunk, which is more than I can say of at least half your guests. Hook a girl up.
This is the first/most weve seen of Whitney in like, two weeks. Some girl said hi to Shep and called him babe and I can see the smoke coming out of Landons ears. OMG JUST HIT ON HIM ALREADY, THIS IS SO PATHETIC TO WATCH.
Craig got Patricia this gaudy flamingo-decorated martini glass and Patricia just HAS to drop that she has 18th-century porcelain. Calm down, Patricia, nobody doubts that you have class. You don’t need to be so ostentatious.
Whitney: Trying to watch Thomas flirt with girls is like trying to watch your horny drunk uncle.
YES. SPOT ON. Somebody give Whitney more screen time!
Cameran shows up poss wasted and with a huge flamingo hat. Cameran is me in college, committing to the theme so hard she doesn’t care if she looks ridiculous.
Five seconds into the party, and Shep is already naked and in the pool. Don’t you know this is a classy affair??
Craig confronts Thomas about Kathryns hospital visit and asks if he saw her. Thomas is likeand Craig is like *sips wine*
Shit-starting Jen may or may not be lying about Thomas not going to visit Kathryn. It’s about to get real.
Craig: One of the reasons Thomas hates Jen so much is because she was supposed to be the fun mistress and wasnt supposed to stick around and meddle in his affairs.
THE PLOT THICKENS. Who can we trust? Nobody, really. Everybodys conniving af. Except Cameran. Im really liking her. Can you tell?
Some girl Bailey asked Landon if she and Shep have ever fucked, or even kissed.
Landon: I’m not gonna lie, theres sometimes I wonder if Shep and I could be in a relationship but I dont wanna risk getting hurt.
Landon. OMG. You are more transparent than every Kardashian PR stunt ever. You clearly wonder ALL THE TIME if you and Shep could be in a relationship, why youre not, when hes going to wake up and realize youre the one for him
Shep gets his fortune told and the fortune teller is like and Sheps like and everyones like Shep is just making a bunch of thats what she said jokes like the mature gentleman he is. Landon, you picked a real winner.
The gay dude who visited Kathryn earlier in the first episode (idk his name, go cross-reference my other recap if you really care that much) pulls Patricia aside to be like
Patricia: I think its very unattractive that hes friends with Kathryn Dennis. Its very low-rent to me. (Yes, she actually used the words “low-rent.”)
Dude whose name I 100% forgot: Its very clear what Patricia sees in Kathryn that she doesnt like: she sees herself.
Patricia calls this dude a knockoff Truman Capote. I gotta say, the South has got their shit-talking on point.
Jen shows up and we already know its going to be good. Thomas is not pleased and calls her a piece of trash. HERE WE GO.
Thomas: Tell this chick Im going to throw her in the pool.
JD: You dont need another assault charge, homie.
One things for sure: some type of confrontation is about to go down.
JD is talking about doing another polo match. Jen is likeaka,
Thomas is watching Jen talk to Elizabeth and JD and hes just seething over there. FWIW, Elizabeth seems like a very nice woman. Jen does not, really. Thomas pulls Jen aside.
Thomas: Craig told me you told him I didn’t see Kathryn in the hospital
Jen: I meant you didnt stay overnight
Cut to: Jen definitely in plain English saying that Thomas wasnt there at all.
Then Jen criticizes Thomas for only being there for two hours. Like, splitting hairs much? Youre just looking for a reason to shit on him.
Jen: If Thomas is criticizing me for putting Kathryns health at risk, he needs to take a long hard look in the mirror and then go play in traffic.
Thomas: A blind person could see through these lies.
They have a lie vs. misunderstanding argument for like 30 seconds before Thomas tells Jennifer to fuck off.
Jennifer: Im the only friend Kathryn trusts. It would be nice if the father of her kids was the other one.
Thomas thinks its Jens mission in life to wreck his life and make him out to be the enemy.
Jen: Im torn between completely cussing him out and telling him how I really feel, or just feeling sorry for him because hes truly delusional.
AKA how I feel watching this show.
Jens like, and Thomas is like And I’m like:
Patricia is not going to like this argument. Very not luxe.
Just when you think punches are about to fly, they both walk away from the argument. Phew, dodged a bullet. Or like, an assault charge.
JD: Thomas and Kathryn have enough problems, Jennifer doesnt need to add to them. This dams gonna break.
Exciting news tidbit: Thomas pronounces water like wooder.
Whats the first thing Jennifer does after being accused of starting drama? She fucking calls Kathryn from the porch of Patricias house! Whitney is like because his mom has to fight his battles. Everybodys gathered to watch while acting like theyre too classy to watch. Jennifer leaves on her own accord, fuck this show for being anticlimactic AF. I wanted an eviction!
Jennifer: I know what Kathryns going through because now I’m the one nobody likes.
Thomas: I can take a lot. Imprisonment, false political allegations, but do not mess with my family. It’s only okay when I treat Kathryn like shit.
Jennifer leaves yelling and once again this show is so fucking anticlimactic! You built up this party for three fucking episodes and what did we get? A heated argument from which both adults walk away on their own accord, and not even one person gets thrown out? Give me some damn drama, give me a fucking cliffhanger! Come on, Bravo! Do better.
div.body_middle_part_right .bodypart:nth-child(n+2), a.prevBody{display: none;}
Source: http://allofbeer.com/2017/05/27/southern-charm-recap-flamingo-ing-crazy/
from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2017/05/27/southern-charm-recap-flamingo-ing-crazy/
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Southern Charm Recap: Flamingo-ing Crazy
Evening, party people. Smiling faces, beautiful places, welcome back to another week of . Lets see what bat shit craziness this week has in store.
Cameran solidifies her role as the unofficial protagonist of the show, narrating the opening sequence (and even saying the word bitch. Well, I do declare!) My familys about to make fun of me for debasing myself by watching this show for yet another week. Suck it, dad, this shits entertaining and makes me feel like a very accomplished adult in comparison to these 35-year-old train wrecks. On a side note, Im kind of getting into this theme song. As an extra side note, my TV is broken and everything is green tinted, which is fitting, I feel.
We open with Thomas on the phone with JD, the former bitching about Kathryn (what else is new?). He rolls up to JDs house and cant even say yes to a cup of coffee without breaking out the French. Ugh, I thought that was a one-episode thing. Thomas apparently told Kathryn he wasnt cosigning her lease (after the whole polo fiasco, if you’ll recall) and she went so nuts that she ended up IN THE HOSPITAL AND MAY HAVE GONE INTO LABOR PREMATURELY. Jesus fucking Christ. So now, what does Thomas do? He agrees to cosign.
JD is like, wait, so you call Kathryn and tell her youre not cosigning, she gets upset, and now youre cosigning anyway because you feel bad for her
JD: I upset my wife plenty of times when she was pregnant but she didnt end up in the hospital over it.
Thomas is like, Wow, everybody was righthomegirl really does know how to manipulate.
Apparently Jennifer is the ultimate shadester, she used to date Thomas and screenshotted everything and sent it to Kathryn just to stir shit up. Taking it a bit far, don’t you think?
Thomas: If I can handle prison for six months, I can handle this bullshit for two more months.
Hold up, like actual prison or just being with Kathryn? Maybe that random Facebook commenter was right and I do need to go back and watch the show from season 1.
Cameran is one of those white people who answers the phone with, Yello! and we promptly learn she was up all night with diarrhea. Gross. Shep goes to watch Craig turn in his application for the bar exam because hes so full of shit that nobody believes him unless they see it with their own eyes. Thats gotta hurt, Craig.
Shep rolls up to good ol Gentry HQ and asks Craig how business is doing. Craig starts talking about some BS I zoned out pretty quick listening to, something about a bourbon side and a hotel side of something.Damn, and youre not gonna let Landon get in on this bourbon business? Thats cold, Craig.
Craig has one more step to nail before he can take the bar, and if he doesnt complete it in time he wont be able to take the test. I feel a setup coming on
These guys are literally arguing over which type of adhesive Craig should use to affix his passport photos to his application.
Cameran meets up with Danni, the roast thief from the earlier episode, and another friend for lunch. One of their friends orders a sweet tea instead of wine and they all jump on her immediately to ask if shes pregnant. Like…a girl can’t order a damn sweet tea in the middle of the day without everyone assuming she’s got a bun in the oven? Cameron is SO OBVIOUSLY not ready to be a mother and these bitches wont leave her the fuck alone about it. Newsflash: This is 2016! Women can aspire to more nowadays than just being a mother. Leave Cameran alone!
Cameran has anxiety too, she reveals, and this show is becoming one giant therapy advertisement. Just goes to show you, money cant solve all your problems. Spinoff idea: What if they all go to the same therapist? Also, Cam’s friend is like, because thats totally a cure for a legitimate mental illness. WTF is wrong with you. What decade do these people live in.
Only 15 minutes in and my fingers are already tired from all this ranting. Gonna be a long episode. Also, wtf happened to Whitney? Is he still alive?
Its finally (almost) time for the flamingo party. Yay! Patricia will be photographing this party for her entertainment book whcih, Im sorry, Im definitely buying. They’re going to have a ros tower and idk what that is, but I know I want one. Patricia is explaining those champagne tower things where you pour the champagne in the top of the pyramid and it spills into all the ones at the bottom and is like, No its not. Its basically 3D beer pong without the balls. Just chill.
Wait ok the Gentry is a hotel?? I feel like an idiot but if they wouldve just explained this shit at the beginning we wouldnt be here. Anyway, Landon and Craig are prepping for the party and going to a spa.
Landon: Part of being a Southern belle is being well-kept, which makes you a good person.
Yeah, maybe on the outside. Im not convinced any of you except Cameran are good people on the inside. And maybeee Craig. He seems pretty earnest.
Craig is aiming for Gatsby-ish pink in terms of outfit color and Landon is like, Im sorry, bitch what? Don’t be over there acting like your Southern asses did not fucking invent salmon pink shorts as a menswear item. Yeah, you THOUGHT you could insult us Yankees.
Jennifer called Craig to let him know Kathryn literally made herself sick and is in the hospital, and he of course feels super bad for her. Meanwhile, Landon does not give one shit!
Landon: Ugh here we go with the drama. People go to the hospital every day. Calm the fuck down.
Okay, people also die everyday, does that make dying any less shitty?
Landon: Did she really almost die? Doubt it. TTYL, DGAF, going to the spa.
Jennifer tells Craig that Thomas didn’t visit Kathryn in the hospital. This detail is important later, so keep it in mind.
Landon: Im tired of Kathryn controlling and manipulating everyone with this child, Im not gonna be manipulated by this psychopath.
Landon literally thinks Kathryn got a slight headache and rushed to the ER. Not sure if this is warranted or not but I’m semi impressed by the fact that she can’t even pretend to be mildly concerned.
We see Kathryn and she explains she basically gave herself such high blood pressure that it affected the baby. IDK how you can personally know what your own blood pressure feels like unless youre constantly taking it, but ok.
Kathryn: All this baby and I need is a stable place to live in a not-stressful environment and if Thomas wont help me get a huge-ass house he doesnt deserve to be in my babys life as far as Im concerned.
Bonus round: Kathryn manipulates Thomas into helping her move, too.
Kathryn: Cosigning on this house is the least he could do for me at this point.
YOU MEAN ASIDE FROM THE LIKE $2500 YOU GET A MONTH? YEAH, I REMEMBER THAT FROM LAST EPISODE, IM NOT A FUCKING IDIOT.
Back at Patricias house where shes still setting up for the flamingo party. God damn, they are milking it.
Patricia: I grew up in the 50s. Mothers wore dresses and high heels and had their hair and makeup done. Ive always maintained you have to put on the dog and try to ge as glamorous as you can.
IDK what putting on the dog means but thats gonna be my next getting ready Instagram caption.
Sligthly disappointed there are no real flamingos at this flamingo party. I was definitely holding out for some exotic birds to be present.
Thomas saying yeah, pop that is the most uncomfortable Ive been all evening, even if they are referring to a bottle of wine.
Thomas is setting Landon up with some dude with a ponytail who I feel like is probably her kryptonite since he seem like the type of dude whod call himself an artist, too. Landon also greets everyone with bonsoir. Can we fucking stop pretending we’re European?
Patricia has a fortune teller at her party. What a rager. I am very sad I did not get an invite. Patricia, if youre reading this, I can clean up really well and I wont get belligerent drunk, which is more than I can say of at least half your guests. Hook a girl up.
This is the first/most weve seen of Whitney in like, two weeks. Some girl said hi to Shep and called him babe and I can see the smoke coming out of Landons ears. OMG JUST HIT ON HIM ALREADY, THIS IS SO PATHETIC TO WATCH.
Craig got Patricia this gaudy flamingo-decorated martini glass and Patricia just HAS to drop that she has 18th-century porcelain. Calm down, Patricia, nobody doubts that you have class. You don’t need to be so ostentatious.
Whitney: Trying to watch Thomas flirt with girls is like trying to watch your horny drunk uncle.
YES. SPOT ON. Somebody give Whitney more screen time!
Cameran shows up poss wasted and with a huge flamingo hat. Cameran is me in college, committing to the theme so hard she doesn’t care if she looks ridiculous.
Five seconds into the party, and Shep is already naked and in the pool. Don’t you know this is a classy affair??
Craig confronts Thomas about Kathryns hospital visit and asks if he saw her. Thomas is likeand Craig is like *sips wine*
Shit-starting Jen may or may not be lying about Thomas not going to visit Kathryn. It’s about to get real.
Craig: One of the reasons Thomas hates Jen so much is because she was supposed to be the fun mistress and wasnt supposed to stick around and meddle in his affairs.
THE PLOT THICKENS. Who can we trust? Nobody, really. Everybodys conniving af. Except Cameran. Im really liking her. Can you tell?
Some girl Bailey asked Landon if she and Shep have ever fucked, or even kissed.
Landon: I’m not gonna lie, theres sometimes I wonder if Shep and I could be in a relationship but I dont wanna risk getting hurt.
Landon. OMG. You are more transparent than every Kardashian PR stunt ever. You clearly wonder ALL THE TIME if you and Shep could be in a relationship, why youre not, when hes going to wake up and realize youre the one for him
Shep gets his fortune told and the fortune teller is like and Sheps like and everyones like Shep is just making a bunch of thats what she said jokes like the mature gentleman he is. Landon, you picked a real winner.
The gay dude who visited Kathryn earlier in the first episode (idk his name, go cross-reference my other recap if you really care that much) pulls Patricia aside to be like
Patricia: I think its very unattractive that hes friends with Kathryn Dennis. Its very low-rent to me. (Yes, she actually used the words “low-rent.”)
Dude whose name I 100% forgot: Its very clear what Patricia sees in Kathryn that she doesnt like: she sees herself.
Patricia calls this dude a knockoff Truman Capote. I gotta say, the South has got their shit-talking on point.
Jen shows up and we already know its going to be good. Thomas is not pleased and calls her a piece of trash. HERE WE GO.
Thomas: Tell this chick Im going to throw her in the pool.
JD: You dont need another assault charge, homie.
One things for sure: some type of confrontation is about to go down.
JD is talking about doing another polo match. Jen is likeaka,
Thomas is watching Jen talk to Elizabeth and JD and hes just seething over there. FWIW, Elizabeth seems like a very nice woman. Jen does not, really. Thomas pulls Jen aside.
Thomas: Craig told me you told him I didn’t see Kathryn in the hospital
Jen: I meant you didnt stay overnight
Cut to: Jen definitely in plain English saying that Thomas wasnt there at all.
Then Jen criticizes Thomas for only being there for two hours. Like, splitting hairs much? Youre just looking for a reason to shit on him.
Jen: If Thomas is criticizing me for putting Kathryns health at risk, he needs to take a long hard look in the mirror and then go play in traffic.
Thomas: A blind person could see through these lies.
They have a lie vs. misunderstanding argument for like 30 seconds before Thomas tells Jennifer to fuck off.
Jennifer: Im the only friend Kathryn trusts. It would be nice if the father of her kids was the other one.
Thomas thinks its Jens mission in life to wreck his life and make him out to be the enemy.
Jen: Im torn between completely cussing him out and telling him how I really feel, or just feeling sorry for him because hes truly delusional.
AKA how I feel watching this show.
Jens like, and Thomas is like And I’m like:
Patricia is not going to like this argument. Very not luxe.
Just when you think punches are about to fly, they both walk away from the argument. Phew, dodged a bullet. Or like, an assault charge.
JD: Thomas and Kathryn have enough problems, Jennifer doesnt need to add to them. This dams gonna break.
Exciting news tidbit: Thomas pronounces water like wooder.
Whats the first thing Jennifer does after being accused of starting drama? She fucking calls Kathryn from the porch of Patricias house! Whitney is like because his mom has to fight his battles. Everybodys gathered to watch while acting like theyre too classy to watch. Jennifer leaves on her own accord, fuck this show for being anticlimactic AF. I wanted an eviction!
Jennifer: I know what Kathryns going through because now I’m the one nobody likes.
Thomas: I can take a lot. Imprisonment, false political allegations, but do not mess with my family. It’s only okay when I treat Kathryn like shit.
Jennifer leaves yelling and once again this show is so fucking anticlimactic! You built up this party for three fucking episodes and what did we get? A heated argument from which both adults walk away on their own accord, and not even one person gets thrown out? Give me some damn drama, give me a fucking cliffhanger! Come on, Bravo! Do better.
div.body_middle_part_right .bodypart:nth-child(n+2), a.prevBody{display: none;}
from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/05/27/southern-charm-recap-flamingo-ing-crazy/
from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/161120493767
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Southern Charm Recap: Flamingo-ing Crazy
Evening, party people. Smiling faces, beautiful places, welcome back to another week of . Lets see what bat shit craziness this week has in store.
Cameran solidifies her role as the unofficial protagonist of the show, narrating the opening sequence (and even saying the word bitch. Well, I do declare!) My familys about to make fun of me for debasing myself by watching this show for yet another week. Suck it, dad, this shits entertaining and makes me feel like a very accomplished adult in comparison to these 35-year-old train wrecks. On a side note, Im kind of getting into this theme song. As an extra side note, my TV is broken and everything is green tinted, which is fitting, I feel.
We open with Thomas on the phone with JD, the former bitching about Kathryn (what else is new?). He rolls up to JDs house and cant even say yes to a cup of coffee without breaking out the French. Ugh, I thought that was a one-episode thing. Thomas apparently told Kathryn he wasnt cosigning her lease (after the whole polo fiasco, if you’ll recall) and she went so nuts that she ended up IN THE HOSPITAL AND MAY HAVE GONE INTO LABOR PREMATURELY. Jesus fucking Christ. So now, what does Thomas do? He agrees to cosign.
JD is like, wait, so you call Kathryn and tell her youre not cosigning, she gets upset, and now youre cosigning anyway because you feel bad for her
JD: I upset my wife plenty of times when she was pregnant but she didnt end up in the hospital over it.
Thomas is like, Wow, everybody was righthomegirl really does know how to manipulate.
Apparently Jennifer is the ultimate shadester, she used to date Thomas and screenshotted everything and sent it to Kathryn just to stir shit up. Taking it a bit far, don’t you think?
Thomas: If I can handle prison for six months, I can handle this bullshit for two more months.
Hold up, like actual prison or just being with Kathryn? Maybe that random Facebook commenter was right and I do need to go back and watch the show from season 1.
Cameran is one of those white people who answers the phone with, Yello! and we promptly learn she was up all night with diarrhea. Gross. Shep goes to watch Craig turn in his application for the bar exam because hes so full of shit that nobody believes him unless they see it with their own eyes. Thats gotta hurt, Craig.
Shep rolls up to good ol Gentry HQ and asks Craig how business is doing. Craig starts talking about some BS I zoned out pretty quick listening to, something about a bourbon side and a hotel side of something.Damn, and youre not gonna let Landon get in on this bourbon business? Thats cold, Craig.
Craig has one more step to nail before he can take the bar, and if he doesnt complete it in time he wont be able to take the test. I feel a setup coming on
These guys are literally arguing over which type of adhesive Craig should use to affix his passport photos to his application.
Cameran meets up with Danni, the roast thief from the earlier episode, and another friend for lunch. One of their friends orders a sweet tea instead of wine and they all jump on her immediately to ask if shes pregnant. Like…a girl can’t order a damn sweet tea in the middle of the day without everyone assuming she’s got a bun in the oven? Cameron is SO OBVIOUSLY not ready to be a mother and these bitches wont leave her the fuck alone about it. Newsflash: This is 2016! Women can aspire to more nowadays than just being a mother. Leave Cameran alone!
Cameran has anxiety too, she reveals, and this show is becoming one giant therapy advertisement. Just goes to show you, money cant solve all your problems. Spinoff idea: What if they all go to the same therapist? Also, Cam’s friend is like, because thats totally a cure for a legitimate mental illness. WTF is wrong with you. What decade do these people live in.
Only 15 minutes in and my fingers are already tired from all this ranting. Gonna be a long episode. Also, wtf happened to Whitney? Is he still alive?
Its finally (almost) time for the flamingo party. Yay! Patricia will be photographing this party for her entertainment book whcih, Im sorry, Im definitely buying. They’re going to have a ros tower and idk what that is, but I know I want one. Patricia is explaining those champagne tower things where you pour the champagne in the top of the pyramid and it spills into all the ones at the bottom and is like, No its not. Its basically 3D beer pong without the balls. Just chill.
Wait ok the Gentry is a hotel?? I feel like an idiot but if they wouldve just explained this shit at the beginning we wouldnt be here. Anyway, Landon and Craig are prepping for the party and going to a spa.
Landon: Part of being a Southern belle is being well-kept, which makes you a good person.
Yeah, maybe on the outside. Im not convinced any of you except Cameran are good people on the inside. And maybeee Craig. He seems pretty earnest.
Craig is aiming for Gatsby-ish pink in terms of outfit color and Landon is like, Im sorry, bitch what? Don’t be over there acting like your Southern asses did not fucking invent salmon pink shorts as a menswear item. Yeah, you THOUGHT you could insult us Yankees.
Jennifer called Craig to let him know Kathryn literally made herself sick and is in the hospital, and he of course feels super bad for her. Meanwhile, Landon does not give one shit!
Landon: Ugh here we go with the drama. People go to the hospital every day. Calm the fuck down.
Okay, people also die everyday, does that make dying any less shitty?
Landon: Did she really almost die? Doubt it. TTYL, DGAF, going to the spa.
Jennifer tells Craig that Thomas didn’t visit Kathryn in the hospital. This detail is important later, so keep it in mind.
Landon: Im tired of Kathryn controlling and manipulating everyone with this child, Im not gonna be manipulated by this psychopath.
Landon literally thinks Kathryn got a slight headache and rushed to the ER. Not sure if this is warranted or not but I’m semi impressed by the fact that she can’t even pretend to be mildly concerned.
We see Kathryn and she explains she basically gave herself such high blood pressure that it affected the baby. IDK how you can personally know what your own blood pressure feels like unless youre constantly taking it, but ok.
Kathryn: All this baby and I need is a stable place to live in a not-stressful environment and if Thomas wont help me get a huge-ass house he doesnt deserve to be in my babys life as far as Im concerned.
Bonus round: Kathryn manipulates Thomas into helping her move, too.
Kathryn: Cosigning on this house is the least he could do for me at this point.
YOU MEAN ASIDE FROM THE LIKE $2500 YOU GET A MONTH? YEAH, I REMEMBER THAT FROM LAST EPISODE, IM NOT A FUCKING IDIOT.
Back at Patricias house where shes still setting up for the flamingo party. God damn, they are milking it.
Patricia: I grew up in the 50s. Mothers wore dresses and high heels and had their hair and makeup done. Ive always maintained you have to put on the dog and try to ge as glamorous as you can.
IDK what putting on the dog means but thats gonna be my next getting ready Instagram caption.
Sligthly disappointed there are no real flamingos at this flamingo party. I was definitely holding out for some exotic birds to be present.
Thomas saying yeah, pop that is the most uncomfortable Ive been all evening, even if they are referring to a bottle of wine.
Thomas is setting Landon up with some dude with a ponytail who I feel like is probably her kryptonite since he seem like the type of dude whod call himself an artist, too. Landon also greets everyone with bonsoir. Can we fucking stop pretending we’re European?
Patricia has a fortune teller at her party. What a rager. I am very sad I did not get an invite. Patricia, if youre reading this, I can clean up really well and I wont get belligerent drunk, which is more than I can say of at least half your guests. Hook a girl up.
This is the first/most weve seen of Whitney in like, two weeks. Some girl said hi to Shep and called him babe and I can see the smoke coming out of Landons ears. OMG JUST HIT ON HIM ALREADY, THIS IS SO PATHETIC TO WATCH.
Craig got Patricia this gaudy flamingo-decorated martini glass and Patricia just HAS to drop that she has 18th-century porcelain. Calm down, Patricia, nobody doubts that you have class. You don’t need to be so ostentatious.
Whitney: Trying to watch Thomas flirt with girls is like trying to watch your horny drunk uncle.
YES. SPOT ON. Somebody give Whitney more screen time!
Cameran shows up poss wasted and with a huge flamingo hat. Cameran is me in college, committing to the theme so hard she doesn’t care if she looks ridiculous.
Five seconds into the party, and Shep is already naked and in the pool. Don’t you know this is a classy affair??
Craig confronts Thomas about Kathryns hospital visit and asks if he saw her. Thomas is likeand Craig is like *sips wine*
Shit-starting Jen may or may not be lying about Thomas not going to visit Kathryn. It’s about to get real.
Craig: One of the reasons Thomas hates Jen so much is because she was supposed to be the fun mistress and wasnt supposed to stick around and meddle in his affairs.
THE PLOT THICKENS. Who can we trust? Nobody, really. Everybodys conniving af. Except Cameran. Im really liking her. Can you tell?
Some girl Bailey asked Landon if she and Shep have ever fucked, or even kissed.
Landon: I’m not gonna lie, theres sometimes I wonder if Shep and I could be in a relationship but I dont wanna risk getting hurt.
Landon. OMG. You are more transparent than every Kardashian PR stunt ever. You clearly wonder ALL THE TIME if you and Shep could be in a relationship, why youre not, when hes going to wake up and realize youre the one for him
Shep gets his fortune told and the fortune teller is like and Sheps like and everyones like Shep is just making a bunch of thats what she said jokes like the mature gentleman he is. Landon, you picked a real winner.
The gay dude who visited Kathryn earlier in the first episode (idk his name, go cross-reference my other recap if you really care that much) pulls Patricia aside to be like
Patricia: I think its very unattractive that hes friends with Kathryn Dennis. Its very low-rent to me. (Yes, she actually used the words “low-rent.”)
Dude whose name I 100% forgot: Its very clear what Patricia sees in Kathryn that she doesnt like: she sees herself.
Patricia calls this dude a knockoff Truman Capote. I gotta say, the South has got their shit-talking on point.
Jen shows up and we already know its going to be good. Thomas is not pleased and calls her a piece of trash. HERE WE GO.
Thomas: Tell this chick Im going to throw her in the pool.
JD: You dont need another assault charge, homie.
One things for sure: some type of confrontation is about to go down.
JD is talking about doing another polo match. Jen is likeaka,
Thomas is watching Jen talk to Elizabeth and JD and hes just seething over there. FWIW, Elizabeth seems like a very nice woman. Jen does not, really. Thomas pulls Jen aside.
Thomas: Craig told me you told him I didn’t see Kathryn in the hospital
Jen: I meant you didnt stay overnight
Cut to: Jen definitely in plain English saying that Thomas wasnt there at all.
Then Jen criticizes Thomas for only being there for two hours. Like, splitting hairs much? Youre just looking for a reason to shit on him.
Jen: If Thomas is criticizing me for putting Kathryns health at risk, he needs to take a long hard look in the mirror and then go play in traffic.
Thomas: A blind person could see through these lies.
They have a lie vs. misunderstanding argument for like 30 seconds before Thomas tells Jennifer to fuck off.
Jennifer: Im the only friend Kathryn trusts. It would be nice if the father of her kids was the other one.
Thomas thinks its Jens mission in life to wreck his life and make him out to be the enemy.
Jen: Im torn between completely cussing him out and telling him how I really feel, or just feeling sorry for him because hes truly delusional.
AKA how I feel watching this show.
Jens like, and Thomas is like And I’m like:
Patricia is not going to like this argument. Very not luxe.
Just when you think punches are about to fly, they both walk away from the argument. Phew, dodged a bullet. Or like, an assault charge.
JD: Thomas and Kathryn have enough problems, Jennifer doesnt need to add to them. This dams gonna break.
Exciting news tidbit: Thomas pronounces water like wooder.
Whats the first thing Jennifer does after being accused of starting drama? She fucking calls Kathryn from the porch of Patricias house! Whitney is like because his mom has to fight his battles. Everybodys gathered to watch while acting like theyre too classy to watch. Jennifer leaves on her own accord, fuck this show for being anticlimactic AF. I wanted an eviction!
Jennifer: I know what Kathryns going through because now I’m the one nobody likes.
Thomas: I can take a lot. Imprisonment, false political allegations, but do not mess with my family. It’s only okay when I treat Kathryn like shit.
Jennifer leaves yelling and once again this show is so fucking anticlimactic! You built up this party for three fucking episodes and what did we get? A heated argument from which both adults walk away on their own accord, and not even one person gets thrown out? Give me some damn drama, give me a fucking cliffhanger! Come on, Bravo! Do better.
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from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/05/27/southern-charm-recap-flamingo-ing-crazy/
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