Why would a guy I’m talking to saying he wants to get to know me and a relationship be (it seems to be) only complimenting me swiping up on my stories then be dry otherwise and not be opening up?

You know why lol. Because he is bread crumbing you and is only saying what you want to hear. He wants to get to know you to get in your drawls that’s why he’s dry and only about your appearance. No effort, he don’t like you.

Dolls, advice of the day is to have a delusional relationship with yourself the way a stan does with their fav.

they never miss any moments in their fav’s life and they always defend them readily without any regret. they are involved in the most useless comments just to be able to discuss how great their fav is. who says you can’t do that for yourself?

there is nothing wrong with living your life as if you’re a celebrity. document your favorite looks, overly exaggerate the features you have that others don’t, highlight your talents and skills, brand yourself cohesively and see life as a runway to market yourself.

do this for at least two weeks. it’ll feel fake and cringe, but the more you pour into yourself instead of giving that to all of your friends or loved ones, the faster you can level up.

the overwhelming, inescapable truth is that they know what they’re doing is hurting you. they’re literally choosing to do it anyway. people have common sense. don’t give them the benefit of the doubt anymore. they would never do it for you. they literally know their behavior isn’t something they’d condone themselves. respect is just the minimum… and they can’t even do that? let them be. that person will answer for what they are doing to you.

Pamela Anderson and one of her lawyers. May, 2000.

writers and artists will go "this isn't good enough." my brother in christ, you're creating something new out of nothing and expressing yourself creatively. your productivity and unrealistic standards of perfection do not define you or the worth of your art. you're doing great.

always remember that they made the choice to see what life was like without you. always remember that even if they might have “loved” you, their idea of love wasn’t enough for them to consider your feelings.

people leave our life and leave words unsaid with such cowardice that we shouldn’t even want to rekindle such a futile fire. it will only give you warmth for a little while… and then the spark is gone.

if they’re not going to work on making you feel warmth and feel held the same way you do for them, then there’s nothing to talk about.

and trust me, you don’t need to figure out a “get back”. stop trying to be seen and heard by someone who played themselves by playing you. one day, the universe will deal them a nasty hand as a lesson. let God’s vengeance and plan outweigh your ego.

I love seeing men gush about their relationships and the women they love. It’s time for the whole trope of men hating being married/ viewing relationships as things holding them back. Amen for men uplifting their women and their relationship. Amen for men getting choked up and ready eyes thinking about the one they love. Amen for men thinking of the woman they are with as their best friend.

I just found out my bf has been lying and cheating on me since day 1. We’ve been together for a year and four months. We had the best relationship in my experience. My first ever healthy relationship. I thought I landed a good man with good morals. Hard working. Great communicator. Family man. Etc! But all through out the relationship he was talking to others, even met up with one of them during the Christmas holidays back home!!! He invited her out for a drink. According to her, he was single. It’s so shocking to think he could live a double life. Not once throughout the relationship did I have a single clue. We planned on getting engaged and married and having a family. Says he wants to marry me and I’m the girl of his dreams. The one he wants.

What’s your advice on infidelity in relationships? Pack up and leave? Try to rebuild the trust? Has any of your followers gone through this and were able to rebuild trust? What’s the process? What steps did you two take. Any advice, insights would be helpful. From you or your followers. Thank you.

I have the opinion that if you’re not legally bound by marriage or even children then you have no reason to stick around and struggle. You are going through emotional labor for someone who could potentially not even marry you in the future and even bring diseases into the relationship. Ultimately, it is your choice but you’re young and can find someone who actually means what they say. Even if you’re able to “rebuild trust”, it’s never the same and you will constantly be looking over your shoulder waiting for the other shoe to drop.

“Rest and self-care are so important. When you take time to replenish your spirit, it allows you to serve others from the overflow. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.”

— Eleanor Brown

when you decide to love yourself more, you pick up the pieces you thought they left and just move tf on with your life. you take those pieces and do some heart surgery. this may be the first person, the tenth person, or the fiftieth that has hurt you and shattered you. but it's far more worth it to reconstruct your heart to be whole again than to let someone who didn't even have half of a heart when they met you steal yours and walk around with it as their own.

it's dramatic, but you have to decide that your life is literally on the line. people lose their minds trying to figure out why someone lied to them and why they're gone. heartbreak (from an ex, a friend, a family member, etc) can literally kill you. the light in your eyes is now a poor excuse for a fire that can barely spark. your appetite doesn't even exist and left a pit in your stomach. your soul is tied to all of the limiting beliefs they brought with them and now, in your unwillingness to see them for who they are, YOU have adopted their same cadence, mindset, and loathing.

i think subconsciously we sit in pity just to feel closer to the person that we couldn't quite "fix" or the person we always say "if they could've just...if i could've gotten them to see XYZ about themselves" or "what if". IF THIS OR THAT.

you can recognize you're in the trenches with them because you really loved them, but you cannot STAY there. this isn't you. in your reality, you are LOVED. you are WHOLE. you are WORTHY.

i don't even think it's the fact other people don't see it. i think they do, and because they see it that means they'll have to live with just as much integrity as you do. they'll have to step outside of their comfort zone and finally measure up to this new person they have around them. and they can't...so they sabotage. but that's the thing. THEY made that decision. so stop suffering on their behalf and let them lay in the bed they made.

and i know you're like, easier said than done??? trust me. one day, you wake up and it doesn't hurt at all. one day, you stop waiting for them to come back. it's like a switch. what am i waiting on someone else for? why would i want someone to decide that they love me? pfft.. literally with those questions, i regain my common sense and detach. it's over, it's done. it's like they never existed.

give them a mental funeral with their flowers for what they DID do that you were able to appreciate - if anything - and look back on the entire thing as an experience you needed to push you in a different direction. stop wishing things were different and start creating a better story. literally, just tell yourself this isn't real and that they passed away.

genuinely believe that sometimes need somebody to fumble as a wake-up call. take that time out, recoup, and write a new story where none of this shit ever happened. and never let anyone have the option to shift YOUR world like that ever again. i mean it.

wish i could call in bitchy to work