#you know something like “wow youre not that gross actually. its definitely not because of your bees-friends even though i like bees.” | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

beevean · 8 months

Note

Hey it’s so called this morning’s anon back with more things to say I suppose…

I supposed I wanted to elaborate on some things, I know you said you didn’t wanna start discourse but I really wanted to elaborate on what I meant by that proshipping comment. The term proship, from what I heard, has gone from let people ship what they want and if you don’t like don’t look to… This person is a disgustingly vile subhuman and their death should be celebrated.

Funnily enough I openly ship problematic stuff, but I constantly over complicate things to prove that I’m still better than ‘those guys’, to say that I have morality and ‘they’ don’t… But it’s so fucking exhausted. My life wasn’t good and moral and pure so why does my art have to be?

I’m sick of fearing I’ll have someone genuinely threaten my life because I cope differently than them. Ironically I used to get mad when people say it was their coping mechanism, calling it a shitty excuse to be a whatever [You can insert all kinds of fun and degrading terms there] and yet… I was doing the same thing.

So yeah… I don’t like everything but I’m realizing that everything has its place and if that makes me a proshipper then fuck it I guess I’m a proshipper

[After reading all those kind messages I wanted some way to reveal myself because surprise you actually know who I am! But I wasn’t sure how to do that without outing myself so openly… I read your Hevor fic and told you about it on Discord, it’s the only thing we ever discussed. So yeah if you manage to figure me out based on that alone then congratulations! Purity culture is ruining my life so bad I can’t even say my own name! ;3]

fdjskfksdngksjdhk talk about efficient secret codes lmao. Yes I understand now 😄

That's pretty much what happened. "Proship" started as a countermovement to the "anti" culture budding around 2016 who were all like "Sheith is actually incest because they're like brothers and that's gross guys!!!!", and at first it meant simply "ship and let ship", but then it got twisted into meaning "someone who enjoys problematic ships/ships with incest, pedophilia and/or abuse", which inevitably leads to "this person has Something Wrong with them and they're a Bad Person who Hurts people like me with their Degenerate Art! Pedo alert pedo alert! PUNISHMENT FOR A THOUSAND YEARS".

The problem is that "enjoys" means a lot of things :^) there is a difference between "aww they're so cute <3", "welp this is a kink now", and "wow this would be incredibly fucked up but I am intrigued to explore this story". But nuance is not allowed, apparently.

(fun fact: I don't really go through proship blogs because I swear they all ship sibling incest. I hate sibling ships lmao, especially when they're wholesome. But of course they're all in the "will accept anything" community, after being pretty much shunned and painted as horrible abusers who deserve to be hurt and worse - and just because I don't want to see those ships, that doesn't mean I think they're bad people who condone real-life abuse. So yeah, proship is not about having all the grossest ships in the world, you can be exclusively into the most vanilla M/F ships ever and still think "yo do what you want I'll respect you from a distance")

I also hear similar stories like yours, of people who twist themselves into pretending to be antis and be morally "purer" than others when in private they were doing the same things they were insulting others for, just with tons of shame and denial. Not judging you and I'm happy when people realize that this behavior is harmful, definitely more than being into the Problematic lol... I'm just disappointed and frustrated that the internet culture has come to this. I reiterate my points about surrounding yourself with friends who don't make you feel like you have to walk on eggshells.

Also real talk: you don't really have to psychoanalyze yourself. Maybe your tastes are tied to an easily identifiable reason, or maybe they aren't or the reason goes too deep to explore without outside help. In any case, it doesn't matter. You don't have to justify yourself in any way, let alone showing to everyone the "I'm Coping With Trauma" badge in the hopes they will forgive you - because it doesn't work. It's never about the mental health of victims, it's about "i feel icky and i don't want to :("

Disgust is not harm. You (general) have every right to be disgusted by something - I myself am not above it :P But it's not a personal attack against you, and it's your responsibility to walk away and coping with your feelings in private.

#important #proship #again the discourse can get way too complicated and nuanced #and these may feel like milquetoast stances lol #but... guess they're not and some people really have to be told 'please don't suicide bait someone because they ship a 17 yo and a 19 yo'#something something funny how antis will scream about the normalization of abuse and incest #when they have normalized threatening real people with real harm in a quirky way

15 notes · View notes

epickiya722 · 1 month

Note

Do you have a certain moot that love a media (anime/manga) that you also love but have a very different view than you? But both of you still friends for years..... I have a moot like that.

I'm a multishipper at heart, so I love shipping from any media that I consume (especially shounen anime/manga). And all my ships are non canon m/m & f/f....My moot also love non canon ships, but only for m/f...

See, after we spend 6 months to binge read all Naruto manga (because both of us did not follow the anime when we were little), do you know what happened?

I said to them, "Wow, now I get it why people ship Naruto/Sasuke, they 're totally gay for each other. And their bond is special..." And they said, "I wish Naruto end up with Sakura and Sasuke just end up alone as the last uchiha.." And I was, 😳😮...They said : " What? Naruto and Sasuke are like brothers (platonic soulmate)...."

Like from any shounen, they can came up with het ship, I cannot get it...

When we started JJK, they said to me, "I ship Yuuji with Nobara, their dynamic is great..." And I was, "Dude, how about Maki? Nobara/Maki and Yuuji/Megumi are way more sense and better.."

They said, "I ship Maki and Yuta, sorry let's just agree to disagree on these ships...."

I answered, "Fine, let me guess, you ship Gojo with Utahime, right?"

They said, "Damn it...! I want to. I do when I first start the series. But then, JJK 0 and Hidden Inventory arc happen...And when Gojo got unsealed, the first thing he did was to got Geto's body to mourn him. And airport scene, the first face he saw was Geto...? I have to be blind to not saw the subtext. For this you won. I can't help but ship Gojo with Geto...."

What do you think 🤭?

P.s Do you understand Yuji/Nobara ship? I can still see Yuta/Maki but Yuji/Nobara.....?

I actually don't think I have a moot like that, well, in terms of shipping. My moots usually have the same ships than I do. Really the things we have different views on would be probably theories and fandoms.

Now, I'll agree on that "let's agree to disagree" thing because hey, we all do have different tastes and opinions.

Okay, fact about me! I actually haven't seen all of Naruto. Hell, I'm just finding out about movies I didn't know existed. (I only knew about... two.) But I seen enough of it to see why people ship Sasuke and Naruto. Like... there's just a lot going there with them. I actually don't get people who only view as platonic and label them as siblings. Just stop at "platonic". I have siblings and we do not treat each other the way some ships be treating each other. Some people aren't even friends with their siblings and have close bonds with them.

I feel like some people who throw the "sibling" label on ships just do it to dig at shippers like "You're the gross one" but... if you're the one who sees them as siblings despite all that subtext then wouldn't that make you the gross one?

Like, you don't have to ship it! But damn, not every ship you see you have to go "Oh my gosh, they're like siblings"!

That's just me!

Moving onto JJK!

When I watch a series, I don't watch it for ships unless it's a romance, but other than that I needs my plot. I'll have my ships along the way, but I'm here for the story and its characters.

It's the case for JJK. When I watched the first season and got into reading the manga, I did get my ships. Gojo and Geto? Yeah, that's a ship that even if you don't ship it, you have to admit that there's definitely something going on there.

Like, you can't resist it!!

This is also Utahime and Shoko for me. I couldn't resist shipping them when finding out they hang out a lot. And I'm going to be honest... and this is going to sound wild... but I don't need more in canon for them, I don't. It seems when you're not shown in canon a lot, you're safe and I need those two safe.

I'm rambling, let's more on.

Okay, about Yuji and Nobara. Hm... I can see why your friend ships them because they do have their moments in the story that is cute and all. I'm a ItaFushi shipper, but I will acknowledge that Nobara and Yuji do have a bond, too and people will ship them because of that. But do I ship them? I don't, not really. They're more like chaotic besties for me. Their vibes are different from the vibes I get with Nobara and Maki.

Those two? Had me like this 👀 during that one scene after the confrontation with Mai. Maki came to save Nobara like her knight and Nobara did not waste time calling Maki pretty.

Overall, I don't fault either of you for having the ships you have. Both of you just have different tastes, is all. And I know with Shonen, "chemistry" tends to be more between characters of the same gender, especially with M/M pairings and there's little to M/F ones and if there is, sometimes it just feels "forced", I guess. But I don't blame M/F shippers for seeing something in their ships. It's just what any shippers do.

Hell, I like rarepairs sometimes even when the characters never had an onscreen interaction.

For me, what makes me like a ship is the characters and their interactions. And depending on the vibes I feel, I either ship it or I'm more indifferent to it.

My grievances when it comes to any ship, no matter the genders, be the shippers themselves. Sometimes, folks can be too much and jerks for no reason. I separate ships from the shippers because sometimes, what if said ship is something I do enjoy or come around to? I don't want to muddle my view on a ship because of the people who aren't even responsible for the characters and the ship itself isn't bad. And not every shipper of that ship is a terrible human being.

Even if me and another person have the same taste in ships, I will block them if their behavior rubs me the wrong way.

With you and your moot! You may have different ships, but do you get along well enough?

I'm rambling again, I'll stop here. That's really all I have to say. (ノ＞▽＜)ノ

#kiya answers #kiya answers questions

5 notes · View notes

monochromer0ses · 9 months

Text

affection

maria x female reader sfw

warnings: none!!

notes: maririn!!!! i love her so much<333

maria and you were never the affectionate couple. at least it seems that way to other people. you were the types to be affectionate in your own ways.

like when maria is streaming for quite a bit you'll be sure to bring her more water or some snacks to tide her over. or when you torture yourself with hours of studying she'll remind you to rest for just a little bit. which you are definitely thankful for since you never wake up with an aching back and sore eyes.

but it is true that you guys never hold hands or do any other couple-y stuff in public. its just that you're both too shy and a little awkward to do that around other people.

especially her gen mates. each of them seems to think its absolutely hilarious to go on and on about how cute you are together. (with the exception of kyo, but he's not any better. instead he fake barfs and talks about how you guys are so gross.)

and while you're both embarrassed, maria has an easier time initiating while you guys are alone. actually now that you think about, you don't think you ever have.

its easy to continue what maria always starts, but whenever you think about holding her hand first or initiating a simple kiss, you get...scared.

not scared that she'll reject because you know she'll never do that, but scared that you'll do it wrong. scared that you'll hurt her. and it sucks. you don't want maria to think you don't love her. you'd never want that.

which leads to...

"hey y/n? can i ask you something?" you hum as you look up at your friend. you had been catching up at a nearby café.

"sure why not," you chuckle a little as you place your fork down on your plate, giving your full attention.

"well, i was just wondering...you are and maria are dating right?" they look a little confused, which causes you to let out a few more laughs.

"yeah we are. why is this suddenly coming up?" you brush your hair back slightly amused as to why this is a question. they already knew didn't they? all your friends know.

"i mean...i never really see you guys kissing or anything. i don't think i've ever seen you guys hold hands actually," their brow furrows and your amusement dies down.

your look gains a rushed apology and a quick change of topic, but your mind stays on that.

it's been a few hours since you and your friends conversation as you lay back on yours and maria's bed. the skirt you picked out slightly rumpled while your pony tail has been out of its hair tie since maybe about thirty minutes after you lied down.

"wow, you look comfy," you hear maria giggle lightly as she walks in, setting shopping bags down.

you look over as a small smile takes the place of your earlier frown. maria is busy looking over some of the bags when a thought you had comes rushing back to the forefront of your mind. i should be the one to kiss her.

you quickly get up, surprising maria as you place your hands on her shoulders, moving her to face you. you swallow the last of your nerves and quickly (but hopefully gentle enough) place your lips on hers.

you hear a sharp intake of breath before her hands come up to rest on your waist, fingers lightly twitching. your kiss is quickly reciprocated, maria overtaking the control. but you don't mind.

because you're not scared anymore.

#nijisanji en x fem reader #maria marionette x fem reader

8 notes · View notes

meetthesoldier · 1 year

Note

hi i gotta know abt ur matt thoughts. i am so down to hear anyone's matt thoughts any time

thank you for asking anon i love matt i love talking about matt heis so fucking goofy. heres a complimentary doodle before the headcanon dump

obligatory queer hc list . asexual, aromantic... considers himself above human concepts of gender. also as an extra thing hes intersex lawl

externally resembles a mishmash of a human and some bird-characteristics but internally is kind of erm. gross? doesnt have quite as many organs as hes supposed to yknow. less bones than the average person. darker blood than youre meant to have. nobody can figure out exactly what the hell is goin on w him because whenever anyone asks he just says something akin to "wouldnt you like to know, weatherboy"

doesnt have parents. like at all. just popped into existence one day fully formed. have you ever seen a star be born? its like that. hes a star. marvel at his being.

npd swag (everyone loves him :.-}!)

smokes HELLA weed. used to being lectured for it since he doesn't even bother to step outside 99% of the time

TERRIBLE at dancing. likes to do it when hes alone but refuses to do it in front of anyone else cus hes not risking the blow to his ego that is people pointing out that he dances like every white boy ever

despite oscars claims that he stifles his immense sexual appeal, the two actually start hanging out a decent bit after 3s ending. this is definitely because i think theyd have a lot of comedic chemistry and NOT me being biased for random minor characters being besties (lie)

listens to a lot of tv girl, car seat headrest, dazey and the scouts... fuckin virgin (joke at my own expense mostly)

"wow this place is a freakshow. i literally dont respect any of you"

urghhhh ive probably said a million other words abt him at some point but these are myy favorite thoughts of him

#hymn.ask #do i maintag this bullshit. fuck it yea #whatre they gonna do? send me hatemail? i get irl hatemail every day #dsaf #matthew virginia #matt #drug use mention #oh right #hymn.png #cc tag

9 notes · View notes

wujico · 5 months

Text

first post.. wow hello void. this is a little more awkward than i thought. i know i should treat this like im writing on paper again in my little taco journal i got from my friend back in elementary, but... idk maybe its the thought that somebody might read this that puts me off. and also the fact that i just.... havent written anything in any sort of journal since i was 16 and making goodbye letters (ToT) what a life

anyway today is a saturday... well its sunday morning at 5am but im riddled with anxiety and cant sleep so :,) im trying to keep my thoughts busy. i work again tomorrow, only six hours which is usual for me, but its fucking -50⁰ where i live rn and I REALLY dont wanna force myself out of bed..... ugh

but ive been really good at never skipping work unless im throwing up all over the place so :,) speaking of that, i just got done being sick with the flu for the SECOND TIME within two months !!!!! i have a horrid immune system.. most of the time when im sick i spend hours rotting away in my bed and on the bathroom floor... these two times were no different

i genuinely was up at like 5am unable to sleep sobbing in my bed because it hurt so much !!! i gen wanted to die lmfao i hate being sick

but its whatever... at least i got to talk to 🍀 while i was high on meds and a 39.8⁰ fever... i said some funny shit but he just entertained me... i love looking back at our messsages.. he really seems to care for me.... crazy

neway yes saturday.. today.. what did i do- well i had work. i was stressing the entire day over being able to get my hw done for uni classes on time but then i just.. decided not to work on it at all. idk.. work was okay. i love working. even though its a a gross fast food restaurant with shady people coming and making a mess 24/7. all that bad cancels out when it comes to my cowokers. ive had so... so so so many people ive loved at this job. people ive loved more than i should and who have left me (WHATS NEW) BUTTT thats a story for another day

well anyway i got to see one of my besties who is always talking about her boy troubles ... i think everyone still thinks im a lesbian there since im not out to them as trans and have a gf 🙃 its kinda funny.. especially with all my male coworkers

who can just goof off and be close to me without the added stress of thinking its going to go anywhere (for the two of us).

wow this is already becoming so long shksjjsskjslk i have a feeling each post is gonna be like this... just a ramble about my life

anyway. i went home and immediately one of my headmates made himself know... his names nikki and hes... newish? hes been around since august 2023 but just recently showed himself. well we played sky together for a while, just the two of us. i sorta.. soft called out 🍀 on my discord status saying something like "chill cr w/ nikki!! anyone can join!" hoping theyd join my game LOL

well it was a call out to any one of my sky friends on disc (my new friend mochi actually ended up seeing it and we got to talk propery on sky for one of the first times... i was so happy)

i felt bad for 🍀 at first because he couldnt see mochis chat messages while we were having a whole ass conversation with 🍀 piggy on my shoulders... but they added each other a little later and i think the convo went well :)

🍀 's sky friend actually joined us as well.. i dont know her... nor do i really care that 🍀 seemed so close with her (well that was definitely a lie i told myself)

im so jealous LMFAOOOO definitely problems related to being stuck in a toxic friend group for 12 years BUT AGAIN thats a story for another day

anyway i was a bit sad at first because there are just things you cant say in a chat with your queer platonic partner when theres a random who you sort of know but have never personally talked to... so i shut off a bit... nikki tho bless him wtf was like- urging me to stop being so closed off towards sky friends sjhdksjsk especially because this person was really nice and even asked if she could tag along (which i said was fine because i cant say no to anything, no matter how hard i try)

it got better tho, when mochi joined

i really am a horrible person, because i felt i finally had equal grounds on 🍀 by being able to talk to mochi while they couldnt

curse being literally delusionally attached to 🍀 because he is my o n l y true friend !!!

i really am selfish for wanting to have all his attention. i am such a shitty human being

anyway... we went to eden (i lead everyone) and then sat and talked for a bit. being on equal ground with mochi about our interest in skz was super refreshing. its been a while since ive talked to anybody... but i recently joined the sky server and mochi and a few others dmed me

half way through i saw me and 🍀 's mutal friend come online.... ill call him 🌟 on here.... i only recently got to know him because i was online on sky alone and decided to join him.. he was doing quests by himself so i got some 1 on 1 time with him and omg hes so cool

i always have this habit of putting everyone else in an "untouchable" catergory, because everyone compared to me is just so much better. i guess i idolized 🌟 in a way because i never got to talk to him... he was only mutals to me through our sky friend group

anyway after that 1 on 1 i immediately felt so amazing and i wanted to talk to him every chance i get... so after mochi left and he hadnt joined our game (which was suprising because i was with 🍀 and the other person who are close to 🌟 and he likes them a lot better than me so i thought hed join one of them.... but he didnt) so i just went and joined his game immediately

i kinda ditched 🍀 but its whatever, i was still in a bad mood from earlier

i was kinda upset and sad all day so.... i was distant in my head and wasnt talking to anyone.. but that wore off the moment i got the chance to talk to 🍀 again

which was when my dad suprised me with mcdonalds !!! i really felt gross after eating it- and still do- but it helps sometimes. to eat that garbage.. ive always been a binge eater

where the hell even was i

yea i teleported to 🌟 to hang out with him and 🍀 warped to me... i didnt really mind because theyre both super cool and my idols but i got a dry ass greeting from 🌟 wheres as 🍀 got a enthusiastic one !! so yeah immediately i was like aight i see how it is

but 🍀 left to do a cr so i got more 1 on 1 time with 🌟 WHICH WAS SO NICE!! i feel like we are getting closer and closer everyday... anyway he was playing some music and i offered to stay and listen and it was gen so nice... i wanted to fall asleep just listening to him play hehe and after every song id complement him and we'd talk about what hed just played (if it was from a game or a movie) .... and well he seemed gen grateful for the compliments which made me fill up with pride

eventually 🍀 came back but i didnt really mind since i got my 1 on 1 time and i enjoy talking to both of them anyway

we had a nice convo going then 🌟 left

i always feel so prideful when i can make people laugh, even though it might even just be a lol or hahaha

then me and 🍀 had one on one time... which is what brings me to writing this

he mentioned he had a secret tumblr diary. this isnt the first time he mentioned it- back when we met irl he said if i could find it i could read it.... i tried to find it lol but couldnt so i just gave up

i didnt even think about it again until tonight.... i thought about trying to find it again but then i was like- yk what would be a better idea !!! make my own !!

so yeah i got the idea from him... a little secret vent diary place that i hope nobody can find (especially him, but if you do find it, im sorry LOL)

really i kinda wanna go looking for his but.... idk after making my own im just like how fucking awkward would it be for him to find mine and read it 😀😀 LIKE THAT WOULD BE SO BAD

so ive given up again

im gonna wait until he shares it with me.. idk when that'll be, but maybe when he does ill have wrote a lot on here and can share this with him as well

after all, i am kinda crazy. ill tell him every little secret about me if he asked.

i have so much to say but no brain power left. oh well

- ji

(1 / 13/ 2024)

0 notes

beta-adjacent · 5 months

Text

AGGHHH YIPPEE :strained smile emoji: I GUESS YALL ARE GETTKNG MORE FEELS TODAY: autism edition (not me having autism, I don’t think, unless this is related to that somehow. Idk my Brian is genuinely so scatterbrained rn I don’t know what to do with myself. Like all my organs are unraveling bc I kept them too compact last week. Sorry, worse stuff under the cut :’)))))))) sorry again)

Bro, my empathy is so fucking bad because I feel too much of people’s emotions and then I just. Assume something I read is something everyone experiences.

Like, number one, got called ~The Spectrum Whisperer~ during the holidays this year ayyyyyyyyyyy let’s go (they all marvel at me, like understanding autism is somehow to be marveled?????????? Skill issue, that’s what they all have.)

Number two, I sometimes feel like a really really bad whisperer (I shouldn’t actually call myself a “whisperer” because again, this shit isn’t hard, people are just assholes or just aren’t taking the time to learn. Fucking skill issues y’all!!!) because I Know I can’t assume or generalize things, but I still do.

Like, ohohoho my god, my anxiety around the thought of autistic people getting their schedule thrown off because of me?????!?!? I want to break down crying and eject my organs out of my body bro. Because I know that feeling!!!! Losing control because you don’t know what’ll happen in your day is fucking angering and confusing and makes you feel terrible!!!!!!! And that’s coming from someone who (probably) doesn’t even have autism.

So good golly, it makes me sick to my stomach to think I’ve ruined someone’s schedule. But I am a human and schedules often go wrong and I feel so guilty everytime it does. I can’t ever tell if it’s better to just suffer through and let the schedule run its course (save their schedule) or if I should just say I can’t do it (and save my schedule).

What’s worse is that I think the majority of the autistics I’m surrounded by rn don’t actually mind schedule changes that much!! It’s a fucking me emotion and assumption I’m imposing onto them, like a total asshole!!!!!!!! It makes me want to break out in hives or pull my bones out of my body, like that level of anguish y’know???!?!?!?

So then of course now I’m the self-fulfilling asshole prophecy who’s ruining my own schedule and torturing everyone else by trying to make everyone fit in my schedule. Which of course I’m aware of and that contributes to just another feeling of self-loathing and doubt.

And what sucks about that is the autistic people in my life rn really prioritize honesty. It’s been so hard to remember to be honest. I kind of forgot why I lie in conversation or about anything at all. No one likes dishonesty. Except those rare times when they do. But I can’t always tell that so I just play it safe by lying about random things all the time. Am I lying to you all right now by explaining this story? I might not be, but now I’ve planted the idea in your head!

anyway uhhh. Right, there’s a rarely seen desire in the people I care about in my life to be truthful about everything. “Ew gross,” I think to them, “even lies of omission?” They reply in my head “especially that!!” I groan, and turn away from them, but then I get scared they disappeared, as if I’m some child and they’re playing peekaboo just to fuck with me. So I whip my head back and they’re still fucking there. Tormenting me, I tell you!! But of course they aren’t actually, it’s just my fear again. Silly fear.

….wow I totally lost track of everything I was talking about. But I’d love to talk to my Good Honest Friends about this stuff, but after all of this, do you really think I’d allow myself to tell them? My Good/Bad Dishonest Friends definitely wouldn’t get it. My Bad Honest Friends actually might…. But they might hurt my feelings if I tell them. Lord forbid they do as I fear and actually say I have a skill issue!

No I’m kidding. None of this is real. I made it all up. I’m perfect and have no such feelings or flaws or worrries. And if I did I’d certainly feel like I could tell absolutely anyone about them other than my therapist who I’ve even started to suspect hates me for my withdrawn nature.

Ok I read through everything I wrote. This is a good skill I learned a long time ago. If I don’t know what I’m saying, I pause and then I think back and then I try to reformulate my thoughts before the anxiety of taking too long to think eats me. So I’m trying to say that my empathy levels of really kind but really really stupid, because I’m imposing my own issue onto others, and instead of just owning up to my issue and working with people on a mutually agreed upon midpoint, I try to cut corners by meeting them exactly where they’re at, which isn’t often where I’m at, and praying I didn’t stretch myself too thin, except they can always tell when I have because I’m so fucking easy to read that it’s embarrassing.

I don’t know what I’d do with myself if they hate me for what I do or think or say. Probably unsavory things. I wish I didn’t care so much. Maybe this isn’t empathy. It’s just some ugly curse I’ve been born with. But I love them so much. But I hate myself so much. I’m so tired.

TLDR uhhh. Purposefully bulldoze over people’s schedules, especially mine.

#vent #rant #idk what this is #a bitch is scatterbrained rn

1 note · View note

servin-up-surveys · 1 year

Text

survey #088

(taken december 14th last year; uploading surveys done while gone)

Can you read lips? NO. I am *HORRIBLE* at trying to read lips, like I absolutely can't.

Do you have trouble feeling excited for other people when they receive good news? Oh absolutely not, I definitely get excited too!

Do you know anyone whose parents are homosexual? I know I have a mom friend who is bi, but she's in a relationship with a man currently. I don't THINK I know anyone full-on gay that's a parent?

Do you consider yourself patriotic? In what ways? Hell no, this country grosses me the fuck out.

Are you part of any online communities? If so, which ones, and how did you get involved in them? I'm in a meerkat RP circle, I'm an admin at the SH wiki (which I have been awfully neglecting lol oops), and I'm active in my WoW main's guild.

Have you ever purchased clothing that you were too afraid to wear? HA yes, when I was still a teen-ish I had this honestly really cute black crop top that just says "FREAK" and I only wore it for a single picture, lol. It would never fit me now. I actually think I mighta got rid of it.

What is your lover's middle name? He doesn't have one.

When was the last time you saw your last ex? Well I saw a PICTURE of us on Facebook like a day or two ago, and fucking finally FB allowed me to delete them. I haven't seen her in person in years and never want to again, either.

Who was the last ex you talked to? Sara.

Who is your best friend? Pick only one. My boyfriend Girt.

Who was the last person to flirt with you, other than your lover? Some random dude on dA, he got blocked real quick lmao.

Would it bother you if your lover flirted with other people? Uh yes???

What exes do you still associate with? None.

What is a topic that interests you so much that you could read about it for hours? Meerkat behaviorisms.

Are there any holidays that you hate? If so, which and why do you dislike them? Columbus Day because that man didn't discover jack shit. Thanksgiving (its roots anyways, it's definitely evolved) because it's a literal celebration of genocide and slavery, etc.

Do you have a secret that you’ve kept for a long time – years, maybe your entire life? If so, why haven’t you told anyone about this secret? Yes, and I don't tell anybody because they affect nobody, are entirely benign, and just really don't matter.

What was the very first social media site you signed up for? MySpace.

If you were in a coma, who would be making healthcare decisions for you? My mom.

What’s something you’ve done that sounds too crazy to be true? The only thing that comes to mind is how many times I've been admitted to psych hospitals; like I lost count many visits ago. I would estimate I've been like, six times. I feel like people who know that would expect me to be crazier than I am.

Does anyone in your family smoke? My dad and his wife do.

What’s your opinion on hunting? Trophy hunting? Fucking barbaric, repulsive, diabolical, just evil. IF however you are hunting for food and have a respectful, appreciative mindset of the animal, then I'm more okay with it than I once was, because here's the thing: that deer you killed out in the beautiful woods, and probably rather quickly, ABSOLUTELY had a better life than that mistreated, miserable cow that was raised simply to be killed and probably given LESS than the bare necessities. I want to emphasize though, mindset is so important here; I wouldn't support you if you were tracking a deer seeking the "thrill" of just killing it. Like in that case, get fucking help. Be very respectful and extremely appreciative of that animal's unwilling sacrifice.

Have you ever had a pet escape and run away? Oh my god I will never forget Teddy doing this one winter night in the snow. I was going BALLISTIC as my dad ran and later drove after him. If I remember well, he ended up being at the pond not too far from our place, which he and Dale (another old dog of ours) had run to before to play. Thank god he was okay, at this time he just still had good energy and was very into marking his territory and smelling EVERYTHING. He also really, really enjoyed the snow, he used to love zooming through it and just playing.

Do any of your exes know each other? Jason and Juan knew and didn't like each other (at least, I was aware Juan openly didn't like Jason, I'm not really sure if Jason felt anything about him). Tyler MIGHT have known either of them, too, I don't know.

What’s an opinion you find impossible to take seriously? "Dinosaurs aren't real," especially when they add on, "Satan put those bones there to lead us away from God." You are PURELY fucking delusional.

Have you met that person that can get into your mind through a sentence? Yeah, Jason. Probably still to this day. He had so much goddamn power over my emotions without even intending it, and I feel like that hasn't fully gone away.

Have you heard of Jeffree Star? What do you think of him? Yes, I genuinely like him and who he's grown into and think his work ethic is fucking unreal.

Who do you think you have cried over the most? lol do I really need to answer this???????????

Do you hate celebrities with big boobs and have had plastic surgery? lol grow up?????? People can do whatever the fuck they want with their own bodies.

Is anybody in your family schizophrenic? If so, what is their life like? A half-sister is, but I've never met or spoken to her; I've seen literally a single picture of her in my entire life. I have no idea what her life is like. Sometimes it rears up to bother me more than usual, how Dad's only kids he interacts with at all are me and my immediate sisters... Even his other daughter Misty had to reach out to HIM when she and her children visited here to go out to dinner so he could actually meet them. Like, that shouldn't be his child's job. Misty is understandable bitter about how she grew up (her mother was absolute, total, 100% insane shit that couldn't even keep custody of her BECAUSE she was fucking mental, and Dad didn't take her), and I just wish she didn't have to be by Dad acting more like a dad to her. WOW welcome to the family therapy session y'all

What’s something somebody can do to make you hate them instantly? Say something inappropriate about a child came to mind first, but there's really a lot of other stuff, honestly. Just being a shitty, gross, violent, and/or forceful person.

Are there regular trains in and out of your town/city? Yes.

What was the last animal you saw, and was it a pet? Roman, right now, 'cuz he jumped up onto the desk to chill by me.

Have you ever watched an anime series, start to finish? Yeah, multiple.

Do you feel the need to rant about anything right now? If so, go for it. So my Tumblr account just RANDOMLY got terminated yesterday (I seriously mean it when I say I did absolutely, positively nothing whatsoever) and I'm rather annoyed by it. This has already happened to me once on my old account, and it took like around a week to get the damn thing back.

How many serious relationships have you been in? Three. Ish. I don't really know what to consider Sara's and my former relationship. Like I feel like we had genuine feelings and did some romantic things without much shyness or anything, but idk. Jason and Girt were/are SO much different from what she and I had.

Do you have a lot of regrets? Yes, and they fucking haunt me and refuse to let me go so I can maybe even mildly like myself.

Have you ever been so angry that you screamed out of nowhere? Yes. I know I've done this a couple times into a pillow, maybe other times without but idr.

Do you have any plans for Valentine’s Day this year? NEXT year I know I want to do at least a LITTLE something. Girt had Covid this year so we couldn't hang out that day and it super bummed me out, really.

What do you usually buy for snacks when you go to the cinema? Almost always popcorn, rarely some sort of candy.

Look to your left and name five things you can see. Presents for Ash's kids from Mom, the closet, the stand with the printer on it, paper shredder, and a cute piece of random artwork on the wall from who knows where.

Do you like having your lip softly bitten when you’re kissing? bro get outta my bedroom

Who is your favourite YouTuber? Overall? It'll probably always be Markiplier, he's my idol, but I really haven't watched him anywhere near regularly in like... two years? His content just generally isn't my style anymore, but I still love him as a person to death. You know, I'm really not too sure WHO my active favorite is anymore. Maybe John Wolfe or Game Grumps, I really don't know.

Have you ever been hopelessly in love with a celebrity? Nah. I have my fangirl episodes, but "hopefully in love" has never been the right phrase at all. I know none of these people personally and therefore can't even truly LOVE them and have always known that absolutely nothing is ever going to happen between me and any random person on the Internet. I can just melt from afar lmao.

What was the last band shirt you wore? I'm quite sure it was Ninja Sex Party. Thankfully it doesn't say the name of the band on the shirt lmfao I wouldn't want to explain that ever.

How many pairs of glasses (not sunglasses) have you owned? I know at least three.

What color is your flash-drive? Hot pink.

What is your favorite color(s) of eye-makeup? B L A C K

Have you ever worn a thumb ring? Yes; that's where I put mine and Sara's friendship ring. Safe to say I don't have it anymore.

What brand of TV do you own? Uh I'm pretty positive it's a Vizio?

Are high school football games fun? Ugh, no. I used to have to go to them quite a bit when my older sister was a cheerleader. There were always wasps and shit around/under the bleachers, it was hot, too crowded, and I just had absolutely no interest in sports. They were also way too long to me. I know a lot of the time Nicole and I didn't even watch, we'd just go find something weird to do that generally involved getting dirty, meeting with other kids that were as bored as us, and going under the bleachers when we weren't supposed to lmao.

When was the last time you had a particularly hectic day? Oh hell if I know.

To whom do you feel the most important? Mom and Girt.

How long has your favorite song been your favorite? Since it came out early this year lmao.

Is one of your favorite colors yellow? No, I actually really don't like yellow.

How old are your siblings? Tbh I only have my two immediate sisters' ages memorized, which are 29 and 24. Others are in their 30s. Katie might even be close to 40, idr and can't math.

Ever had a fishtank in your room? No.

Do you drink more soda than anything else? Not anymore! It's generally flavored sparkling water.

Do you know anyone who wears camouflage often? my brother in christ I live in the SOUTH

How many jobs have you had? Three.

Do you hate your last ex? I VERY much don't like her, at all, but I'm past my "ugh I hate her" phase. I ain't wasting my energy on hating someone I never have to see or speak to ever again.

Are you ashamed of any of your family members? My uncle who my family no longer associates with. He's a fucking filthy slug of a human being.

Have you ever been in a courtroom? Yes.

Were you a chubby child? No, I was pretty normal.

Are you afraid to sing in front of people? Yes. To get you to visualize the sheer extent, in the over three and a half years Jason and I dated, he heard me sing ONCE, at church.

When did you last dance with someone? Uh with Sara a few years ago.

Do you feel awkward watching sex scenes? Yes, but not AS bad as when I was like, a teenager. I still do feel exceptionally uncomfortable if it's with my mom present, though.

Did you ever have senior photos done? No. I wanted to, we just... didn't, I don't remember why.

Do you attend church regularly? You literally could not even PAY me to go to church, never mind regularly. It's complete fucking brainwashing and greatly diminishes genuine, confident self-worth. I don't consider myself a Satanist, but even I can still say hail thyself, hunty.

Have you ever wanted to be a teacher? lol absolutely not.

Are you currently listening to music? Yeah, "Modern Love" by Mother Mother just started.

The person who last spoke to you in person, what is their name? Donna, but Mom to me.

The person who last texted you, tell me their name? Still Donna, lol.

What was your favorite class to take in school? Art courses and German.

Have you ever had a pixie cut? No, but I'd like one one day... Both my mom and hairdresser have told me I would look amazing with one now, which I really appreciated, but I just can't convince myself. I know it's a stereotype that fat people usually can't pull off short hair, and trust me it was ballsy enough for me to get it as short as it is now, I'd just be so obsessively paranoid that people would think I'm uglier with a pixie cut.

Is your signature legible? I think so, yeah.

If the person you like/love proposed to you right now, you would say? I know I'd say yes even though I know it's unwise to do so this early. Thankfully I'm pretty damn sure just given Girt's intelligence and dedication and strong pragmatism, he knows way better than to do that anytime soon.

Are you satisfied with your current camera? I sure am, and I'm actually pretty excited, I know Mom is ordering a pack of lenses (polarizing, ND, and UV) for it for Christmas!

When was the last time you felt ignored? Um idk. Probably during some family dinner at my sister's, I know I've been totally talked over adn brushed off more than once.

Is smoking an immediate turnoff to you? I won't ever attracted to a smoking man til I saw Richard Kruspe bro 😭 lol but generally yes, celebs don't count, right?

If given the opportunity, would you legally change your name? Nah, too used to this one and plus I like it.

Has religion ever come between you and a friend or family member? Yep.

Has anyone ever told you that you were worthless? Well, in fucking essence, Sara has.

If you jumped out the nearest window, would you live? Yes, very easily.

Is there an animal that scares you? I have a very intense irrational fear of larva, like maggots and stuff. Cicadas also notably freak me out, I can't handle their eyes. Whale sharks are another irrational fear, their mouths creep me out. Australian spiders like their funnel-web are freaky too.

When you get blood tests, do you feel faint afterwards? No.

Do you think you will have a date for prom? Whoa now buddy you are WAY late, lol. I went to Jason's senior prom and he went to mine.

Are you afraid of being cheated on? Not really, at least not with Girt. I hope this doesn't sound all arrogant or full of myself, but just factually, this guy wanted me way too long for me to even really WONDER if he'd cheat on me. He's directly told me he wanted to date in high school, but he didn't do anything because he was concerned what people would think of the age gap. Then Jason came along and he respected that.

Do you know how to play poker? It's actually funny, I did as a KID but don't now, hahaha. I really enjoyed it as a child, just obviously without monetary gambling.

Is your face shape oval, heart shaped or square? I genuinely don't know.

When was the last time someone asked you to go somewhere? When Girt invited me to his place Friday for his sister's birthday.

Do you have small wrists? Yeah; even with my size, my wrists are definitely noticeably small. Like I can slip those security bracelets off at the psych hospital (lmfao what a talent) or like the skating rink to show you paid.

Are you someone’s best friend? Girt always calls me his. <3

What’s the biggest annoyance in your life right now? The state of my legs, really. I'm gonna get on fixing this shit, I've had enough. It stops me from SO much.

Do you know anyone that smokes weed? I know one major pothead irl as well as one online; I'm certain others do it, but being a pothead is like, literally a major part of these two girls' personalities.

How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? A hell of a lot.

Thinking back to the person you fell hardest for, do you still feel that way? Nope.

If you’re a girl, what’s your bra size? Funny thing, I actually don't know. I know I'm naturally a C-something, but being my weight, I'm not at all convinced that's accurate right now. This is gonna sound wild, but I haven't had a properly-fitting bra in literal years; I just wear some that were Mom's that somewhat fit, but absolutely not properly, but enough to where it's not incredibly obvious with clothes on. I'm pretty sure I need something custom because if the cup fits, the back doesn't, and if the back fits, the fucking cup doesn't. It's extremely annoying, but bras are not cheap, especially when you're not a standard size.

Ever known anyone who did business with a prostitute? I have zero idea.

If your parents are divorced, how old are your step parents? Kim is a couple years younger than Dad, so mid/late 50s.

Do you like your step parents, or are they assholes? She's an intolerant bigot/obnoxious Christian, but she has good traits, too.

[TW: DOMESTIC VIOLENCE/ABUSE] Ever had an abusive parent or other family member? No, thankfully.

Ever walked in on your parents while they were getting busy? If so, how many times and how old were you? No; I find it SO hard to accept that my parents ever did have sex lmao, they were SO incompatible and just never got along, it seemed like growing up.

If you were to get pregnant as a teen, what would happen? Well, I woulda kept it, because at the time I was pro-life. Thank fuck this never happened.

Do you prefer broccoli or asparagus? Broccoli, I absolutely hate asparagus.

What was the last flattering thing someone did/said to/for you? Uhhhhhh let's see probably something Girt said, he honestly says stuff like that a lot. ;__; <3

Do you know anybody that believes that magic/witchery truly exists? Yep, my sister Misty to name just one.

Roughly how hot are the summer temperatures where you reside? Usually 90s, sometimes low 100s. I absolutely hate it.

#survey #surveys #personal questions #random questions

0 notes

thechekhov · 3 years

Photo

Alright, alright, I caved.

After a slot opened up in me to be able to take on another show emotionally, I decided to invest in OwlHouse. I thought I would probably like it, but it won me over faster than I thought it would.

I’ve already watched a few episodes, but I realized that it might be more fun to do liveblogs, so here I am - with a liveblog...

I will be doing this episode by episode, and probably releasing them every once in a while. Everything will be under a cut, however, to save you all dash space.

If you’d like to follow, please track the #chekhov watches owlhouse tag!

(I’d also like to dedicate this post to the Tumblr Staff Rob, who did his best to restore this post for me when tumblr queue ate it.)

Without further ado...

Episode 1!!

Fair warning - this is technically not a ‘live’ blog, because I have already watched some of the show before deciding to do this, but I’ll still react to them to round things out.

Immediately, this reminds me of Little Witch Academia... Anyone? No? Only me? I feel like maybe I’m getting my wires crossed, but there HAD to have been some inspiration taken from there?

“No-- my only weakness! Dying!!“

Same, big snake monster. Same.

Oh, backup snakes? This girl is READY.

Please don’t mistreat the snakes.

Spider breath... This kid is on my wavelength. That griffin seems to be waiting to be put out of its misery though, and I don’t blame it.

My child... where did you get that pigeon head though.....

Nurse mother, do you REALLY think signing up your spider-summoning daughter for summer camp will actively make her antics slow down instead of ramp up to 60?

Awww, baby makes AMVs... But also, NO ONE TOLD YOU TO THROW AWAY THE BOOK??? I know it’s symbolic, but goodness, isn’t that a bit much???

wait a sec, is that Eda????

Love the realistic bilingual kid experience of replying in English when your mom talks to you in your native language. Universal.

Love this introduction of Eda’s character. She’s got that little green scarf on and everything. Like a tiny trash grandma.

Oooh, okay, let’s extrapolate...

Lots of bones everywhere. I kinda love the aesthetic here - it’s gross and visceral, kind of like what Luz was making with her school projects. Yet in the middle of it all we have a rather clear gothic looking structure. Is this a power imbalance in the supposed kingdom?

The five circles of stained glass seem to perhaps indicate something like Hogwarts houses? Several different types of magic?

But Luz has no reason to freak out as much as she is - she LOVES weird stuff! Haha... No, I kid, I kid. I get it.

“Am I in the bad place?“

Eyyyyy, gotta love shows referencing other shows. :)

“Oh dear child... I’m not like you.”

Wow, what a DRAMATIC reveal for some pointy ears. :) I love her.

We should all aspire to have such cool and stylistically well put together wanted posters. You can tell the commissioned artist really respects her craft.

Steven Universe fans watching this:

I’m looking too.

Okay, okay, enough shenanigans, let’s have some LORE.

I love this landscape. Teeth or bones, or whatever they are, this is one of the more unique settings we’ve gotten, though maybe I’m prejudiced because I love body horror and bones. The darker orange and red themes fit really well here.

Things I’m desperate for: Giraffe Lore

Things I’m more desperate for: Eda lore. Why do her limbs fall off? Is she a zombie?

Things I’m not quite as desperate for: Hooty lore. He can keep that to himself.

well hello there mysterious chekhov’s glyph which will DEFINITELY not be relevant in the second chapter (or end of season? Maybe? Idk it just seems important).

Ah, yes. That would have been my reaction as well, to be fair. Somehow I didn’t expect to see this guy so early on. I figured he would be a low stress early villain that got assimilated into the Found Family. Kinda psyched that he’s just there from the start.

....I’m just gonna presume this is all true and accept it at face value.

Old Escape The Cops Lady and Tiny Little Demon King, I need your backstory. How did you meet.

I love looking at background details, because like... you can tell the BG artists had fun. I particularly love how the 3 eyed toad doesn’t actually have any reward attached to her. Though the Knife Baby does intrigue me!

“I write fanfics of food falling in love.”

Why am I being called out...

“Noo! My weak nerd arms!”

Finally, a realistic portrayal of a protagonist thrust into a fantasy setting!

.....................

Okay but. If only humans could pass through the barrier... wouldn’t that mean a human had to have deposited those things in there? Do they have a human on staff in this weird pseudo-prison??? Suspicious....

Confession - when I initially saw ads for this show, I expected Eda to be a villain, not a loveable middle aged witch aunt figure. I am shockingly even MORE drawn to her this way. I expected betrayal. I expected her to be a lowkey threat?? But no. She’s just wholesome in the way a solid raccoon is.

“Eda, are you okay?!”

“Yeah, this just happens when you get older...”

“........does it..?”

If I had to pinpoint the exact moment this show won me over...... it would probably be this one.

I know it’s probably the wrong thing to focus on, but what is that insignia? Wings??? Like.... the kind OWLS HAVE?????

COINCIDENCE??? I THINK NOT!!!

I’m really loving the landscape here. And those fireworks are... hmm... intricate?

Gotta love the old tried and true Witch Apprentice Actually A Live In Intern trope. :)

Hold up...

Is that

Is that Hooty? I thought he was just a door....

Eda: This is my room for human stuff. I will also put my human in there.

. . .

Overall rating: I think this is a cute overall beginning. The prison break went hard! I enjoyed the characters and it kind of surprised me in a lot of ways. It definitely does a great job setting up a world with a lot more to explore while giving us a small taste of cool magic stuff and witchy battles. :)

Now on to Episode 2!!

Read the liveblogs in order by clicking here!

#the owl house #owl house liveblog #chekhov watches owlhouse

448 notes · View notes

yoongiseesawmp3 · 3 years

Text

punch me - jungkook

back again with another self indulgent fic! enjoy

summary: daycare worker jungkook invites you, his favorite coworker, to the lake with his friends. why the lake? he wants you to see his new sleeve and whipping his shirt off in the classroom isn’t quite acceptable. plus he just wants to spend more time with you. there’s no harm in that.

warnings: none i think!

word count: 3.5k

you work at a daycare, which isn’t a bad thing. it’s pretty chill, you like the kids and you can take off work pretty easy because there’s tons of subs. but also, not many people are bringing their kids in lately. so that means you and the other staff have been digging into the snack closet so “they won’t go to waste.”

jungkook was the one who suggested it. well, maybe suggest is the wrong word? he got caught up to his elbows in the bin of sweets, so when he turned to face your boss he immediately went into charming mode so he wouldn’t get in trouble. and once jungkook said it, everyone else thought it was a good idea too. hell, you’ve stopped buying snacks for yourself because you just sneak them from work now. wait. don’t tell anyone that.

anyway, it was a great idea, but that was two weeks ago. now the snack closet is empty and you have a room full of toddlers on the verge of anarchy because of it. because of jungkook.

you just watched him pass by your room, arms laden with cheez-its and rice krispie treats, and you know for a fact he doesn’t have a class today. he’s only here to touch up the mural he’s been asked to paint near the front desk, so all of those snacks must be for him.

you get the teacher from next door to keep an eye on your kiddos so you can sneak to the front and steal a couple bags of cheez-its (the kids don’t need their own bag, they’ll never know). but you get there and find yourself distracted from completing your mission.

jungkook is wearing old sweats, spattered with paint here and there, and he’s stooped over a bucket of water with a paintbrush between his teeth. it’s cute.

“jungkook,” you semi-shout to get his attention. you get a sort of “hmgpfh?” in response, and that’s enough for you. “do you seriously need this many snacks? just for yourself?”

“i’m a growing boy, y/n,” he replies, taking the paintbrush out of his mouth so he can dip it into a paper plate covered in red shades. “you can have one.”

“i need three, actually,” you reply, picking them up as you speak.

“are you a growing boy too?”

“no, i have six little kids with bad attitudes waiting for me in my room so i’ll be taking these off your hands,” you explain, finally turning to look at the work jungkook has put on the wall. “wow.”

“you like it?” jungkook asks, turning to look at you with a smile and a dancing light in his eyes. “is the tree too much?”

“no, oh my god, this is really good, jungkook,” you assure him, tracing your eyes over the wall full of characters and scenery from various children’s books.

“thank you,” he replies. “it’s better than wiping asses all day.”

“watch your mouth.”

“why don’t you watch it for me?” he quips back, peeking up at you with a smirk.

“what does that even mean, jungkook.”

“just thought i’d try to make you blush,” he says with a shrug. “didn’t work this time.”

“i don’t think it works anytime, actually,” you mumble, but he ignores it.

“hey, are you busy this weekend?” he questions, inspecting a bottle of green before squirting some directly on the wall.

“are you sure you know what you’re doing?” you ask with a laugh. you watch him frantically spread the paint around to resemble a bush.

“shut up. are you busy this weekend?” he asks again.

“i don’t think so, why?”

“come to the lake with me,” he says as he stands up to meet your eyes. “one of my friends convinced his uncle to let us borrow his boat. it’ll be fun.”

“do any of you know how to drive a boat?” you ask. “the safety of all this is what would keep me away.”

“i’m sure yoongi hyung will be able to do it,” jungkook says halfheartedly. “but still, the boat could just stay docked. it would be fun either way.”

“when are you going?”

“saturday, so i could come by yours and get you on my way?” he asks with a lot of hope in his voice. you shrug before responding.

“why not? sure.”

so, jungkook texts you late friday that he’ll pick you up at 7am saturday. what the fuck. you wouldn’t have said yes if you knew you had to leave that early, but jungkook explained that he’s the only one the uncle trusts to have the keys, so he has to get there before the world wakes up. but also, has this man met jungkook? jungkook, being trustworthy with small, easy to lose items? please.

nevertheless, you’re up bright and early on saturday with a very large thermos of coffee. jungkook texts you right at 7 that he’s outside, and when you walk out you see him at the back of his car trying to force something into the trunk.

“whatcha doin?” you ask as you approach, noticing his strong legs in his (surprisingly) short swim trunks. you’re now realizing you’ve never seen him in anything other than baggy pants, so his legs are a little...distracting.

“trying to keep the beer bottles from rattling,” he says through clenched teeth.

“and you’re trying to fuse them together with sheer force?”

“no, i’m stuffing a towel in between them in the box but it’s really tight.”

“if hoseok were here he’d make a ‘that’s what she said’ joke,” you jest.

“i thought about it,” jungkook replies. “so i guess that counts?”

as he talks, he rearranges the other things in the trunk so it can close easy, and as he lowers the door he turns to you.

“you look nice,” he says, eyes drifting over you quickly. he notices the coffee cup in your hand and smiles. “any chance that has the sickly sweet creamer in it that i like?”

“how would i know what coffee creamer you like?” you ask, slightly annoyed that he just assumes you pay that much attention to him but also annoyed that you got caught.

“because you like me,” he replies, grabbing the thermos and taking a sip. “oh my god, i love you.”

“you better be talking to the coffee,” you warn him as you grab the coffee back from him.

“i’ll say it to you someday,” he promises, walking around to the passenger side of the car before opening your door. “if you let me.”

“what’s gotten into you lately?” you ask with a smile. you’d be lying if you said you didn’t have a little crush on jungkook, and recently it’s gotten worse. after you started working together, you noticed how many shared friends you have, so you’ve been hanging out more and more the past few months. jungkook has always been more than nice to you, but these flirty little comments are a welcome change. you hope they keep coming.

“is it cool if we stop at the gas station real quick?” he asks as he gets into the driver’s seat. “it’s an hour drive and i need gas and snacks.”

“fine with me. how about cheez-its and rice krispies?”

“i had my fill of those at work this week, thanks,” jungkook laughs.

at the gas station, you offer to get the snacks while jungkook stays at the pump. you’re looking for your favorite gas station snack, a crappy fruit and cheese danish that you could eat every day. jungkook finds you bent over in the sweets aisle, ass poking out too much for him to pass by and not push your face right into the premade baked goods. he considers it, because funny, but mean. he also considers passing behind you and smacking your ass as he does so you’ll move. tempting, but maybe too far. he opts for just bending down next to you to see what’s so interesting.

“what are we looking for?” he asks, scanning the labels for something to try.

“cherry and cheese,” you tell him, moving a blueberry danish out of the way, hoping to find what you want, but no luck.

“what? that sounds gross,” jungkook replies as he stands. “you like that?”

“it’s one of my favorites,” you tell him as you move into a squat. jungkook slides behind you and looks for his favorite jelly candy as you keep searching. “what’s so gross about it? they go well together.”

“like us.”

“what?”

“huh?” jungkook asks, staring down at you with a glint in his eyes. the glare you give him is definitely ignored as jungkook looks back up and spots something on the top shelf. he grabs it and hands it to you. “this what you want?”

“yeah, it is,” you reply. “thanks. get another one for yourself.”

“why?” he asks, screwing his face up in disgust.

“because i know you’ll want to try some even with the way you’re acting right now, and i don’t like sharing.”

“whatever you say,” he grumbles with a roll of his eyes. “now help me find the sour worms.”

jungkook tried the danish, and he hated it.

have you ever seen a baby eating a lemon? it was like that, except jungkook spat what was in his mouth into his hand and then tossed it out the window of his car as he drove. sure, that whole part was gross, but he looked cute when he didn’t like the danish. who doesn’t love babies making silly faces?

“i can’t believe you like that, but i can’t believe you convinced me to try it,” jungkook complains.

“kook, i think if i told you electrocuting yourself was fun you would try it just because i said i liked it,” you reply. he thinks about it for a moment before nodding, a slight tint gracing his cheeks.

“you’re right, but that’s not gonna make me finish your gross choice of snack.”

“fine, more for me,” you say, grabbing the discarded treat in the cupholder. you take a bite, not really caring that jungkook’s mouth was on it before you.

“omg.”

“did you just say ‘omg’ out loud?”

“yes, why?”

“you’re a loser,” you laugh, taking another bite, causing jungkook to gasp again. “what?”

“it’s like we just kissed,” he replies, almost giggling through his toothy smile.

“what do you even mean by that.”

“we just swapped spit.”

“you’re disgusting. stop talking.”

“hey, you’re the one that wants to kiss me,” jungkook says with a shrug. you want to protest, but you don’t want to convince him that you’re totally against kissing him. you’d actually very much like to plant your lips on his and never let go, but life doesn’t always give you what you want. jungkook notices your silence and smiles. “you’re not denying it.”

“i’m being polite.”

“mmmhmm,” he replies, failing to hide how pleased he is as he pulls into a treacherously sloped driveway. “we’re here.”

it’s turning into a beautiful day. the morning chill is starting to slowly melt away, and you find yourself sweating slightly as you help jungkook move all of the junk from his car. he insisted on doing it himself, but you felt super weird just standing there while he huffed and puffed carrying things back and forth, so you finally jumped in. it’s still just the two of you here, the friend’s uncle had successfully given you both a crash course on how to handle the boat, and you’re confident the two of you can share that info with yoongi when he gets here and hopefully no one will get hurt.

speaking of yoongi, he said he was a few minutes away, and that was more than a few minutes ago. maybe he and hoseok got lost. the final four (as they’ve been calling themselves all morning) will be here later because taehyung didn’t have a swimsuit and they had to make a pit stop at walmart to get him one. you’re familiar with jungkook’s friends, and comfortable with a couple of them, but you don’t know much about taehyung aside from his interest in art and now his view on the boxer vs briefs debate (he was apparently very picky when trying on said swimsuits). but whatever. they’ll get here eventually.

before you know it, you and jungkook have unloaded all of the snacks, alcohol and water accessories from his car, so all that’s left to do is hang out until the boys get here.

“you ready?” jungkook asks, offering you his hand. you give him a questioning look and he motions to the boat. “c’mon, we’re not gonna sit here in the sun while we wait for them. it’s hot as balls.”

“but it’s hot as balls on the boat too,” you counter as you take his outstretched hand and let him pull you behind him on the dock.

“yeah, but at least we’re on a boat.”

he leads you to the edge of the shaky dock and let’s go of your hand momentarily to steady himself as he steps over to the boat. he turns back and offers his hand again, giving yours a squeeze as he guides you over the gap of water. the boat is slippery, so you lose your footing slightly and jungkook reacts quickly by wrapping you in his arms. the boat is bobbing a little too much for your liking, but jungkook is giggling and that distracts you enough from the fact that you could’ve fallen just now.

as you both stand there awkwardly staring at each other, you don’t notice yoongi’s car pulling up to the top of the hill and its two passengers walking out toward the water.

“oooh, what do we have here?” hoseok asks as he sees you holding onto each other for dear life. you separate quickly, making the newcomers laugh.

“don’t stop because we’re here,” yoongi replies.

“yeah, i can hug yoongi if it makes things less awkward for you,” hoseok offers.

“please don’t do that,” yoongi quips back.

“i’ll get you when you least expect it, hyung.”

jungkook, still standing very close to you, clears his throat and waves yoongi over. you scoot around them to help hoseok with the bag of food in his hands.

“are you sure you know how to drive a boat, yoongi?” you ask.

“i’m a fast learner,” he replies.

“that’s not very reassuring.”

“i’ve done it before, y/n,” he laughs. “just not with this kind of motor, but it won’t take long to figure out. everything will be nice and safe, i promise.”

“besides, we have jungkookie here to save you even if hyung throws us overboard,” hoseok jokes.

speaking of jungkook, he’s rustling around the boat, trying to figure out how to put the suncover up. his jacket from this morning has been tossed aside, and he’s in a baggy tank top. you allow yourself a moment to admire the way his muscles ripple as he works when you notice -

“you finished your sleeve?” you ask him. his head snaps up in your direction and he smiles.

“enjoying the show?” he teases.

“answer the question.”

“honestly, i wanted it to be a surprise,” he replies, stretching the arm out and turning it around as best he can.

“so what, you were gonna take your shirt off and punch me and that’s how i was supposed to find out?”

“are you offering?”

“i’m just mad you didn’t take me with you! i was gonna get something this time,” you complain with a slight pout, which jungkook scrunches his nose at. you’re really cute, he thinks to himself.

“my artist called me last minute and said they had an opening, so i went in as soon as i could. i think you were still handling six hungry toddlers,” he explains.

“so is that why you invited me today?” you laugh. “you couldn’t think of a reasonable way to take your shirt off in front of me so i had to come with you to the lake for the big reveal?”

“jungkook, if you say yes, then jin and i are giving you the sex talk. you gotta up your game,” yoongi mumbles.

“no,” jungkook insists, ignoring yoongi. “i invited you today because i think it’ll be fun and i wanted you to be here.”

“and he wanted to see you in a swimsuit,” hoseok adds, pulling some cookies out of the bag of snacks. he offers them to you and you gladly accept. then he turns and pops one into yoongi’s mouth as he yawns, before he tosses one over to jungkook, happily shouting “a cookie for kookie!”

“that’s cute,” you smile, liking the way hoseok babies jungkook. it’s got him flustered, and it’s kind of adorable.

“kook, did you hear that? y/n thinks you’re cute,” hoseok sing-songs.

“i- that’s not...i didn’t say that,” you stumble. “the rhyming was cute. if anything, i called hoseok cute.”

“everyone thinks hobi is cute,” yoongi replies. “but jungkook? eh.”

“eh?!” jungkook shouts. “i’m just eh to you hyung?”

“now you hurt the boy’s feelings,” you tell yoongi, and he shrugs.

“you should’ve just called him cute.”

you look over and notice jungkook is staring at you, an eyebrow quirked in a challenge. hoseok is watching and munching like this is a movie, and yoongi looks between you and the so-called cutie and laughs to himself.

“well?” jungkook asks.

“i mean, yeah, you are cute, sometimes,” you begin. “not when you’re being annoying though.”

“i’m not annoying!”

“yes you are,” hoseok and yoongi agree in unison. jungkook huffs at that and looks back at you.

“now my feelings are hurt again. talk more about me being cute,” he pleads as he finally gives up on the suncover and joins you on the wraparound couch of the boat. he’s looking at you with the absolute worst puppy dog eyes, so you keep going.

“uh, you’re cute with the kids i guess? like when they use you as their personal playground and you’re all giggling. that’s cute,” you offer. “or when the little girls get hurt, they always run to you first and you cheer them up with sweet songs.”

“hmm, family planning perhaps?” you hear hoseok joke with yoongi.

you would go on (or deny how often you’ve thought about jungkook being a dad) but the other car of boys has finally arrived, so the two instigators leave the boat to help them unload. that leaves you next to jungkook, who’s not done talking about the cute stuff.

“i didn’t know you noticed all of that,” jungkook whispers, suddenly sitting very close to you. you try to act like it’s nothing, but he stops you. “ah ah, now it’s my turn.”

“your turn? for what?”

“for talking about how cute you are,” he says like it’s the most obvious thing ever. if he had his way he would be pulling up a whole powerpoint presentation right now, but he has to rely on his words, which is fine. “first of all, you have great style. you’re maybe the only person who can make the daycare uniform look like a capital o outfit everyday you come in. and the way your eyes light up when a kid tells you a story, or shows you something they made? that’s my favorite. wish you would look at me like that someday.”

“you...what?” you almost can’t believe where this conversation has gone, but it’s making your heart beat faster and you’re not ready for it to stop.

“i wish i could make your eyes light up like i’m the only person you can see,” he clarifies, locking eyes with you. he holds your gaze for a moment before his eyes flick down to your lips. you wouldn’t have noticed if you weren’t so close, but the movement was obvious. jungkook wants to kiss you.

“and what would you do if they did?” you challenge, repeating the same glance from his eyes down to his lips. your gaze lingers a little longer, and when you look back up at jungkook you know what’s coming next. that doesn’t mean it’s not shocking, though.

kissing jungkook is like pulling down a piece of the sun and slamming it into your chest. the warmth that he exudes, and the softness of his lips as they caress yours, it’s perfect. but -

“wait,” jungkook mumbles against your lips. you pull back, worried.

“what?”

“i did that wrong.”

“wha..how? jungkook, i thought that was nice,” you assure him but he shakes his head.

“i did it wrong,” he insists, looking at you and noticing the shine in your eyes that he was hoping for. “can i kiss you again?”

you nod and let out a quiet “yes” before jungkook is cupping your face and connecting your lips again. this one is stronger, more intentional and you’re glad he wanted to try again. not that the first kiss was bad, your mind is still reeling from that first one. but this feels like a kiss full of love. it feels like a kiss from someone that’s been pining for you over bags of cheez-its and funny kid stories, but they didn’t know how to tell you how badly they wanted to do this. jungkook didn’t know how to tell you, but now he doesn’t have to because this kiss tells you everything you need to know.

#jeon jungkook #jungkook #jeon jeongguk #jeongguk #jeon jungkook fanfic #jeon jungkook fic #jeon jungkook fluff #jeon jungkook imagine #jeon jungkook one shot

214 notes · View notes

cooloddball · 3 years

Text

This is going to be a super long analysis of jib3 starting with the opening ceremony to the closing ceremony so brace yourselves.

Please note I believe in the breakup theory so maybe my opinion in this one might be biased so please don’t come for me, lol.

I will put it under the cut to avoid overcrowding your dashes with cockles shenanigans.

Also, watch out for profanities and mature language.

And so it begins...

Opening ceremony

The camera used to record the opening ceremony is shaky.

Misha, Jason Manns, and Jarpad seem to be having a lot of fun together and Jensen is just looking at his besties talking to the man he loves and he knows he can’t have that so he just stands there looking at them. Poor guy.

Jarpad asks who took Misha’s riffle? Things are awkward, I honestly don’t know what’s going on.

Misha kisses a plushie while making eye contact with Jensen and Jensen is like “oh, oh, wow” while making eye contact with Misha. LOL. Jack help me. This is a lot!!!

Jensen takes a plushie from Sebastian and Jared takes the one Misha had.

Are you guys flirting about trying to see whether you can keep plushies alive?

Misha throws something at the fans, I think he was throwing treats from earlier or whatever it was and Jensen says “Misha is still throwing” I mean why?

Cockles Panel

Jensen is so extra in this panel.

First of all, when he and Misha come out (no pun intended) a song starts playing and he starts dancing. Jensen is usually so poised while dancing but he is over the top throwing his back and shaking his tush for the mish. I think he was trying a little too hard. Misha spares his ex-boyfriend’s tush a glance smiles and looks away. LOL. The whole thing was cringey, tbh. It was so unlike Jensen.

When Sebastian touches Jensen’s shoulder and says something to Jensen, he [Jensen] laughs way too hard. I would say he laughs abnormally-it’s loud and he throws his whole body into it like he’s trying to prove what Sebastian was funny and it probably wasn’t. He laughs so hard he ends up right on Misha’s side. and Misha laughs at that though.

Rich says something about something in the sac that hurts(It’s incoherent) and Jensen says it hurts right here pointing at his heart (I can’t hear what they are saying exactly so if anyone knows please let me know)

I don’t know if Mark P. was going to hug Jensen or not or he was pointing at something behind Jensen, but at that moment, Jensen sees Sebastian going to hug Misha and whips his head away from Mark P’s direction so fast he almost broke his neck.

Sebastian humps Misha (these two are so playful I love them) and Jensen is just there acting awkward

There’s a comment by Rich about “It’s over, the convention’s over I’m no longer your bitch” I don’t know who this is about.

Now, now, now. This whole time Rich is doing a kissy mouth with his fingers on the monitor behind Jensen and Misha. His hand is right where Misha is standing (you’ll understand once you watch it) so Jensen makes a kissy face back and Misha is blushing? Ummm wtf is going on here?

Jensen also does something strange that he never does during cockles panels he pulls his seat away from Misha.

Misha makes a very weird comment about Sebastian’s libido drying up and they have a weird conversation about libido and Viagra ads. It’s weird.

It gets even more awkward Jensen talks about bringing a total stranger, and a blind date. And it goes downhill from there with them. The it wasn’t you it was me speech. It was special. So heartbreaking. It was clearly not about the show but about their relationship. I always have a difficult time getting through that part. It’s so awkward that the fans are just there wondering what the hell is going on.

They decide to take questions and the fan is all over the place so Misha interjects but Jensen won’t let Misha say what he wants to say so he says, “This is why you make it awkward. You never let people finish what they are saying.” Ouch. Domestic dispute vibes anyone?

The way Jensen is looking up at Misha when he’s answering that question. It’s like he wants to sear his face into his memory before they leave Rome.

Jensen is explaining to a fan how one of the four sound stages they had on set was full of furniture and Misha adds “and soiled mattresses” I mean what was the reason? Did they soil the mattresses with their [redacted]

A fan mentions something about Dean and Cas so these two adorable dorks smile and share a look. Things are starting to look up. Thank Jack.

The fan says something again (I can’t make out what he’s saying) but it must be something nice because they look at each other with smiles on their faces again.

Jensen playing with the head of his microphone. Is it just me or did the temperature rise a notch higher?

The way they look at each other when the fan says to help him choose the hottest female cast member on the show

Then something freaky happens they say the exact same thing as twins or bffs do sometimes. LOL.

When they start talking about the hot women with the fans Misha moves his entire body and now instead of looking at the fans, he is seated facing Jensen. The tension is simmering down.

A point to note is that in all their panels they always sit angled facing each other as opposed to facing the crowd save for this panel and DCCON 2019. But for DCCON I can understand that they weren’t comfortable being meant to be a J/2 panel and a creation event. So you know some people in that crowd are super mean to Mish and others to Jensen, so they had to tread carefully. But I digress back to the chaos.

They ask who wants to have a cockles panel the next year and they both raise their hands. I thought that was sweet

It’s adorable how Jensen keeps repeating everything Misha is saying.

Misha forgets himself and moves too close to Jensen to listen to the song on the phone. Jensen turns to look at Misha, I don’t know what that look is but Misha backs away laughing.

Jensen’s face journey while listening to that song is gold.

Misha moves closer to listen to the song. I have to say the way they are standing is not usually how two bros listening to music usually stand. If you know what I mean

Misha agrees that’s definitely Jensen singing. Of course, he knows because Mr. “Jensen sings to me all the time”

He looks so proud of him. I’d venture to say he’s happy to hear Jensen sing because he has always been so shy about that fact about himself. He even gives him a standing ovation. That’s so adorable. He loves him. My heart.

Jensen is so cute trying to deny it’s not him singing that song. Yeah, it’s you, Jensen. Even your ex agrees it’s you and we bet he knows how your voice sounds in all kinds of situations ;)

we get a tingly feeling so we know it’s you. Jensen’s adorable smile when Misha says that. Aww.

The way they are not even looking at each other but they are seated the exact same way.

Allow me to explain to my friend here. Explains how his parents didn’t know whether he was a boy or a girl. Misha with the steel chair, “when did they figure out that you were a boy?”

How many years did they call you holly?

For six to seven years

Is it just me or is this conversation a flashback of teenage twink-lesbian Jensen years?

Fan asks whether Dean will ever forgive Cas. Watch Misha’s body language, he is trying to pacify himself by rubbing the back of his neck and fumbling with his shirt.

When Jensen says “ No!” without a moment’s hesitation, Misha looks distraught? I don’t know maybe I’m reading too much into this but I feel like this hit too close to home being that they were most likely broken up.

Misha however has a different opinion, “I think he has”

Jensen says, “Wishful thinking” and that elicits a smile from Misha.

A fan asks about Dean giving Cas the trenchcoat back and things get interesting. Weirdly, that Jensen can’t say the word gay out loud. He literally uses the word “unmanly” in its stead in the guise of censorship? It’s not a bad word Jensen you can say it. However, Misha and the fans say the word so I’m wondering who is censoring Jensen’s use of that word. He eventually says it but super fast.

Jensen says that saying “I always knew you would come back” is not something he would say to another human being, especially a man. Jesus, there’s nothing wrong with saying that to another human being you care about. He’s the one making it gay. He was extra when answering that one.

They spent one and half hours making that scene just to end up not saying anything and it ended up looking gay anyway. Anyway, that’s interesting.

Jensen angles his body towards Mish and says in a very low soft and sexy voice “I guess I really hoped that you would come back some day” I would venture to say that Jensen at the moment in the panel was actually saying them to Misha. Who knows though?

They talk about it a whole lot for something that bothered him that much.

Misha being so excited about recreating a scene when a fan told Jarpad he’s amazing and Jarpad said "you are welcome.

“I think I understand what she wants. I’m not sure what she’s gonna get.” This is a very good line Misha. I will be using it often.

The way they awkwardly stand too close and whisper to each other. Umm…what is going on here?

Jensen folds over laughing because of something Misha says. They are back. The tension is almost 90% gone now and they are in their element.

The chaos of recording the alarm ringtone for the fan was just great to watch. They kept getting closer and closer and I think they might have shared spit at that point. Gross….LOL

The way Misha is sitting is he you know.

Jensen asking Misha whether he was saying anything or just screaming while they were recording. I think he just wanted to see Misha smile.

Jensen’s joy when a fan mentions that they have Misha’s résumé.

Jensen saying the word shit made my day. I curse a lot and it made me feel validated somehow.

Misha calls him dickhead in return and Jensen stops functioning and laughs instead . He also gets all hot and bothered trying to fumble with the lapel of his shirt. He does this a lot when he is turned on. He has a humiliation kink I think.

They start talking over each other about Misha’s special skills. Looks like Jensen might have known beforehand because he went straight for that. Or maybe he didn’t know but he knew since Misha is a mad genius there must be some amazing things in there. Either way, it was a good moment.

OMG Jensen is so excited and the way he motions to Misha to bring that résumé to him, LOL. This man was thirsty AF.

He even goes down from the stage to meet Misha and invades his personal space trying to reach the résumé. I think this is the moment the tension between them dissipated completely and they were back to some form of normalcy.

Misha holding Jensen’s shoulder trying to get his résumé back. Unsucessfully, I should add.

They read something funny and they fold over laughing and spin around like overjoyed seals. It is far removed from the mollusk family but at least it’s still a sea creature (I don’t know what I’m saying please don’t mind me)

Jensen is still on his knees laughing and can’t get up. As I said, he is being too extra in this panel.

Misha is trying to talk but they both can’t stop laughing. I think Jensen laughed so hard he got an extra set of abs that day.

Jensen is still laughing and you know what he is laughing at? Misha’s special skills being acting on camera. I mean it’s funny but man, prayforjensen.

They are still laughing. Jack, help them.

The way Jensen looks at Misha with pure adoration here makes me so happy and reminds me of the fictional characters they played being all heart eyes for each other.

Misha laughed so hard he cried.

Jensen trying to read the next ‘special skill’ Misha has but he can’t even talk because of how funny he thinks it is. He’s trying so hard not to laugh but he can’t help himself.

Jensen agreeing and also asking the audience to agree that Misha has a knack for certain accents. Accent kink anyone?

Jensen is so excited when Misha starts Tibetan throating singing and does the unicorn laugh facing away from the crowd. Bet he has experienced Misha’s Tibetan throat singing skills on a personal when they are (loud overhead helicopter noises followed by thunder rumbling)

Jensen falling to the ground after feigning a heart attack once he saw that Misha is a certified EMT. I mentioned before that I honestly, 100% think he wanted mouth to mouth. There’s no other explanation. He could’ve feigned a nose bleed or just about any other illness but he chose to fall on a dirty floor and lay down so Misha could either give him the breath of life or straddle him. Luckily for him his dream came true 7 years later at Jib9 when straddle gate happened. But I digress

Too bad Misha was still mad at him and heartbroken so he kicked him instead.

Jensen knowing that Misha kayaks seems to be part of his personal knowledge. Maybe they did it together sometimes.

Horseback riding. Hmm is it just me or do they seem awkward here?

Misha is so close to Jensen’s armpits. Must be missing his man’s musk and being held in those muscular arms again. Poor baby.

Misha can’t talk because of how funny he finds bicycle touring. I mean…I don’t see what’s funny but I guess he knows why it’s funny.

Misha laughing and raises his legs because Jensen is elaborating on the bicycle touring. Maybe it’s an inside joke or maybe it’s no longer funny to me because I’ve watched this panel like 5 times.

I think Jensen’s goal was to see Misha laugh and be happy because he turned to look at Misha who was still laughing hard and the joy on Jensen’s face. Aww.

Misha gravitating towards his man again. He must smell really nice Misha. And those arms. Bet he used to lift you against the wall and (this fucking thunder won’t stop rambling. Are chuck and Amara fighting again?)

Jensen marketing his man’s carpentry skills but then makes sure to make it ‘no homo’ by saying he would never sit on anything Misha has built. Sure Jan. Then he circles back and says that he knows that he can build things.

Misha walks away from him and he looks up to make sure where he is going. Maybe he was afraid Misha was walking out on him. (PTSD from their breakup?)

They mention acting on camera again.

And laugh

Jensen keeps talking about the acting on camera and watches to see if Misha is still laughing He still is and Jensen is happy that his baby is happy. He looks at him again and he is still happy that Misha is still happy. Then once the laughter dies down he starts talking about bicycle touring and checks again to see if Misha is laughing which he is so Jensen throws his head back unicorn laughing and then looks at Misha again to see that he’s still laughing. Then they look at each other and say something maybe it’s about that was a good laugh. Jensen is wiping tears from his eyes because of how hard he laughed Misha does the same. That entire thing was insane and they seemed to love it.

Jensen starts saying that being this happy or goofing around is how they are on set sometimes and have to take a 5-10 minute break and Misha doesn’t seem too happy at the mention of the set.

Jensen knowing that you can buy résumés on eBay. Did he buy Misha’s and then plant someone in the audience to bring it up or? Okay, yeah I know I’m reaching here but it’s probable.

I guess my theory wasn’t farfetched because Jensen says that he’s pretty sure that Jarpad put it on eBay the previous night so maybe he is the one who did all that to win Misha back?

Jensen knows the appellation clogging is a stretch. Seems like Misha has told him about it before.

Jensen looking at his watch to see if they have time for Misha to be telling a story about his high school sweetheart and now wife. I bet he wishes Misha could tell their love story so openly. He can’t stop looking at Misha.

The way Jensen is looking at Misha here. WTF man? He’s literally confused about what the question is.

The personal space question. This whole thing was just so many things. It was awkward, cringey, thirsty, funny.

when the fan asks whether there’s a funny fact between Jensen and Misha. I almost fainted. What? And Jensen repeats it. The two men are so stoic. They are not even looking at each other. They are looking at the fan like the way a statue stares at you, unmoving. Cringe.

The room is so quiet. Poor girl, I hope she didn’t feel awkward afterwards because if it were me, I would’ve cried from how stoic they looked and how quiet everyone was.

How they both scratch themselves, Misha on the head and Jensen on the nose. Maybe the question hit too close to home

Jensen turns to look at Misha as if to say ’help me out here man. We don’t wanna disappoint our fans.”

Misha gets it because he gets up. This whole thing is gold.

The way Jensen breathes out in anticipation. I know it was like they were playing a skit about personal space but why was he breathing like that? Shouldn’t he have been playing it as ‘uncomfortable’ not ‘turned on.’ Boudoir mannerisms.

Moving on Misha is unsure on where to touch Jensen 40.31. This is weird in and of itself because usually, they don’t have a problem touching each other’s faces, tush, eggplants, (jib4 anyone), backs et cetera. But now it’s weird? *cough* breakup *cough*

Misha touches Jensen’s ear and Jensen literally moans. He frigging moans people. In case it is not clear in the video, here is an isolated audio version of it. Jensen is also fumbling with his shirt like he’s all hot and bothered. Just like Misha did earlier. Was Jib3 their couple’s therapy that reminded them how happy and horny they made each other?

Jensen is really not answering the question, to be honest. He’s fumbling for words and trying so very hard to make sense but his word are incoherent.

Misha going in for the nose dip. I know friends do this all the time but you have to be very close and familiar with someone such as a friend friend or a sibling for you to poke a finger in their nose. I mean noses are slimy and eww…anyway. That happened. They seem so comfortable with it. Jensen I love you but please stop talking.

The way Jensen looks at Misha. He has the cutest smile on his face as if saying thank you for making that fun and making me horny, I still want you.

Misha wiping his pinky that touched Jensen’s nose on his pants. (I wanted to add something disgusting about what heshould’ve done with that pinky but I won’t so let’s move on)

Jensen wiggling his nose.

When Misha suggests that Spn moves to Nickolodeon. Jensen laughs a bit too hard.

Misha talking about spn being a puppet show reminds me of how he mentioned them having a puppet show in Jensen’s backyard after the show is over.

Jensen also saying that in a way spn is a puppet show. I mean is someone making snide comments about how their strings get pulled and sometimes they are not happy about it. Like how they fired his boyfriend. It seems like it’s an inside joke.

They named the plushie Zippy aww :))

For jack’s sake guys, the way they look at each other when they mention that the résumé was the highlight of the panel.

Jensen saying the more dirt you dig up on Misha, the more rewarded you are. Aww, someone’s trying to win his man back by any means necessary. You go girl…I mean Jensen.

He talks more about how he’s looking forward to next year when fans have more dirt on his friend Misha. Jensen didn’t want to leave the stage, he was lingering so he could spend more time with Misha.

It’s over guys.

Closing Ceremony

I know you didn’t ask for the closing ceremony but here you go. It’s a free gift.

Can I just mention how Jarpad is an overactive puppy? He has to play with anything and everything he finds.

The mc announces Misha twice for some reason. The second time Jensen looks in Misha’s direction with a small smile on his face. He [Jensen] is also chewing vigorously.

Jensen and Jarpad being typical dude bros and karate chop Rich. This is why the difference between his relationship with Jarpad and Misha stands out. He would be too busy making heart eyes to Misha to kick another guy. LoL.

Jensen hulking out when Jarpad is taking a video of everyone. Lol. This video keeps reiterating my point that his relationship with the two men is just different.

Jensen keeps looking in Misha’s direction, Misha who is busy talking to Steve and having fun. Let me also mention Steve is Jensen’s bestie and so are Jarpad and Misha, but I’m sure that Jensen felt some type of way, jealous when they were having so much fun with his man and he couldn’t. Jarpad also takes a while filming Misha for Jensen of course. They remind me of me having a crush back when I was in school. Wait, did Misha look at Jensen? It’s hard to see because the angle of the video is not expansive but I guess he was.

As soon as Jarpad gets back, Jensen takes the camera from him and starts filming fans. I’m sure he just wanted Misha to look at him

Rich mention’s Misha and something about acting on camera and Jensen licks his lips looking at Misha (I think).

Jensen then vigorously grabs the microphone from someone immediately and mention’s Misha. Jarpad’s reaction at that moment tells you everything you need to know about what’s going on between Jensen and Misha. It looks like he is pleading with Jensen in his head saying, “Don’t embarrass yourself bro. Please don’t” but it’s too late.

Jensen again talks about Misha’s résumé and specifically about acting on camera, the thing that made Misha laugh out loud during their panel. Someone’s smitten. Defending his ex-man.

Jarpad goes to whisper something to Misha. And they laugh while Jensen is thanking the jib staff for doing an amazing job. But when he sees the duo laughing, he loses track of thought and says “and they are all getting married” dude what ??? How do you go from thanking people who worked on the convention and in .1 seconds you are talking about they are all getting married? Who is? Are you okay? Do you need to sit down? No one gets it, he says he’s kidding and gives Jarpad the microphone, spares a glance at Misha and he seems distraught from that moment on. I wish I could see Misha’s face through all this.

He’s glancing in Misha’s direction again. Man’s got it bad. What?! Oh to be loved by Jensen Ackles. Misha must be a prize, I know he is a mad genius and gorgeous and sexy as hell with that golden skin that looks like it was dipped in gold and honey, big blue eyes that are bluer than the bluest blue, but Jensen wtf man? You are in public.

I think Jarpad is telling Jensen something maybe it has to do with what he and Misha were talking about earlier?

And it’s over people.

Overall, I agree with the breakup theory. I mean the way these two were acting around each other was very strange. If you watch Misha and Jarpad, they seem okay from the opening ceremony up till the end but Jensen and Misha are just being weird.

The panel was mostly fun but their body language told a story that something was definitely going on between them.

@littlewolf2703

#jib3 #jibcon 2012 #jib3 analysis #jib3 cockles panel #cockles #this was a doozy #glad to be done #there was a lot going on in that panel #cockles break up #cockles break up theory

221 notes · View notes

neurontheory · 3 years

Text

Sex/Life & Netflix’s Faux Feminism Set A Poor Example For Young Women

Wow. Let’s ignore all the bad writing, terribly cliche storylines and extremely tired tropes for a minute – and – focus on the show’s protagonist, Billie (Sarah Shahi).

Billie is thoroughly infuriating.

I spent the longest time trying to decide if Sarah Shahi who plays Billie in Sex/Life was, in fact, a terrible actress. In all honesty, it’s impossible to tell and it’s a pointless argument to have. Billie’s character only reveals two emotions over the course of the show’s eight episodes.

She’s clearly meant to be fierce and wilful but I suppose the writers were just too lazy to write that into their show.

And so, instead Billie is always either really horny and moaning while recalling the great sex she and her ex partner Brad had, or – massively distraught and on the verge of tears. She’s on the verge of tears around her husband, her ex, her best friend, the school moms and even her children.

It’s truly bizarre. Personally? I’m just amazed anyone is willing to spend any time around someone so emotionally labile. How can you go through childbirth (twice) and be someone’s mother and still be so emotionally labile?

What’s even more bizarre..

What’s even more bizarre is that this emotional lability really doesn’t fit with everything else we know about Billie.

This is because Billie is a thirty something year old with two children and a PhD in psychology – someone experienced whose been around the block quite a few times, dating and sleeping around with lots of different men.

What I’m wondering is just how can someone like Billie (with this much romantic and sexual experience) still believe she actually requires a man to self actualise? HOW?!

This is not a feminist series

This series is perhaps worst for its frankly gross anti feminist messaging. Billie doesn’t know what she wants and she’s really struggling between choosing to live a quiet life with Cooper and the kids in the suburbs or getting back with her ex (Brad) in search of a more passionate and “wilder” life (in the city?).

Who knew living in the city would be such a crazy idea? Definitely not me.

I can totally accept that this would be a struggle for anyone to have to go through but this goes on around in circles and for ABSOLUTE AGES. Billie will not leave Cooper and also will not allow herself to be happy with him, moving on from Brad – who, she admits, was a terrible and often unreliable partner.

Talk about a self destructive protagonist, eh?

Billie never realises at any one point during the eight episodes of Sex/Life that the source of her non-fulfilment is likely due to the fact that she derives both purpose and identity from the men she chooses to date – whether that man is Cooper or Brad.

She’s basically always chasing a construct of a woman that a guy like Brad or Cooper would date.

But why can’t she just be Billie?

What’s so wrong with Billie?

The show gives us every indication that Billie is smart, fun and wonderful to have around – or, at least used to be, before she reduced her life/identity to being Cooper’s wife or Brad’s girlfriend. The show’s highlight is perhaps Sasha Snow’s (Margaret Odette) character who plays Billie’s best friend from college; but only because it offers us a glimpse on what Billie could have been (much happier, for a start) had she not gotten embroiled in this messy relationship drama.

I know all this because I used to be Billie. I used to chase relationships (and men) to give my life some sort meaning. In the end, it took a messy break up to make me realise what a huge gamble it was to put all your eggs in one basket and then give that basket away to a man so he can break those eggs.

The thing is.. I’m only 25 and I have no children and no PhD in psychology and I figured all this out so why hasn’t Billie and why haven’t the writers of this show figured this out either?

The writers don’t see anything wrong with the storyline. The conflict in this series is never that Billie needs to find her true self and live a life that is true to her – and only her.

Instead, the conflict (and Billie) are reduced to a thirty something year old woman who’s going through a bit of a mid-life crisis and can’t decide whether to go home with Brad and Cooper.

This is an incredibly reductive view of women and I personally don’t care if the writers of this show are male or female – their misogyny is as clear as daylight either way.

This is because men, whether on TV or on film (or the latest trash coming out of Netflix), are always told to be somebody. Women, on the other hand, are told to be with somebody.

This messaging can’t be more obvious than in Sex/Life where Cooper is a successful banker and Brad owns a record label.

How much agency does Billie really have? Why can’t Billie be somebody?

Sex/Life does nothing but set a poor example for young women.

#sex/life #netflix #netflix original #Netflix originals #Netflix series #feminism #relationships #marriage #cheating #misogyny #tv recommendations #review

123 notes · View notes

i-simp-for-gintoki · 3 years

Text

Sanji and Ace meeting fem!s/o’s parents for the first time

I accidentally deleted the request like the idiot i am, so basically it was “Ace and Sanji meeting their fem!s/o’s parents for the first time, but the s/o gets upset at an embarrasing/mean thing the parents said towards her boyfriend(s)”

Sorry for the long wait! Time flew by way faster than i thought it would and i really struggled with this lmao. Hope this is to your liking! If not just let me know and i’ll do my best to fix it!

I didn’t rlly know how to end these im sorry, um i made sanji’s more angsty than needed because i just did but oh well

Warnings: like one swear word, your dad is kinda a dick and disapproving of your relationship in sanji’s

Portgas D. Ace

He would not dress up, instead simply putting on an unbuttoned shirt instead of remaining shirtless

He might- might take off the hat but thats only if you REALLY want him too

I think he would be pretty relaxed about meeting your parents

You on the other hand was not

I mean dont get me wrong Ace is a sweetheart and all, but he also can be pretty gross without meaning too

You two were planning on heading to your parent’s house so Ace could finally meet them, so in the meantime you told him to keep a few promises

“No using anyones clothing as napkins, finish chewing before talking, and if they say something that annoys you please don’t fight them.”

He’d give you a thumbs up and a smile as he said he’d keep the promise

So here you guys are, in front of where your parents lived

Knocking on the door, it only took a few seconds for them to show up

As Ace introduced himself he bowed and had a bright smile

Your parents smiled back and let you two in

So far so good

All of you were just relaxing in the living room, your parents sat across from where you and Ace sat

Your parents listened as Ace told a bunch of stories about his life, it mainly consisted of the trouble he’d get in with his brothers or how he met and fell in love with you but he was having fun sharing them

Your parents seemed to be enjoying his company and that made you happy

After talking for a while your mother decided to make a quick meal for everyone in which Ace asked if he could help a bit

Your dad decided to put him in charge of setting the table

He had almost dropped a plate in the process but he got it done and wore a proud smile

It wasn’t long until you guys began to ate and you could tell Ace was definitely holding back from how he usually acted

“Whats the point of forks when i can grab it so much faster using my hands?” he mumbled to no one in particular

What really surprised you was that he made sure to properly chew his food before speaking

You were really happy that he was keeping his word but sadly all good things come to an end

“Wow! Mrs.L/n your food is really--”

THUNK

He passed out.

He passed out face first into his plate and your parents could only stare

You could only sigh as you tilted his face so he doesn’t manage to suffocate

“Oh my, is he okay?” your mom asked in a worried tone and you nodded your head

“Ah yeah he’s fine. Hes a narcoleptic thats all. He’ll wake up any moment”

And not even a few seconds later, Ace straightened up and continued eating like nothing even happened

Your mother laughed

“Oh wow! He reminds me of a baby!”

“Mom!”

He rose a brow at the two of you, unaware of what you were talking about, food still smeared onto his face

You clicked your tongue and grabbed a napkin before wiping his face

“See he is like a little kid” she repeated and you rolled your eyes in response

Ace’s eyes widened a bit as he finally understood what happened

“Did I pass out again?”

“You passed out again.”

He rubbed the back of his head and gave an apology to your mom who in return laughed loudly

“Oh no worries dear, when y/n was younger she would pull countless all nighters and end up doing the same thing”

“Mooom stop it”

“Oh shush this is all light hearted fun”

As your dad started a separate conversation, Ace grabbed your hand under the table and smiled

He was having fun, even if you guys were being teased

Vinsmoke Sanji

Idk how i feel about this one rip

He was a bit nervous yet excited

He couldn't wait to meet the people who raised you, but he was worried if they wouldn’t like him

He chose to wear one of his best suits and cologne despite your protests

“Sanji its just my parents, you don’t need to be any more fancy than usual” “Nonsense, i should take it seriously so your parents can see im serious about you.”

He’d insist on making dinner for them

Once your parents arrive he puts on a charming smile and introduces himself

Skip to dinner, Sanji made sure to sit everyone down and serve them

Some nice small talk was made when suddenly one of your parents asks him if Sanji truly loves you

An instant “of course!” was heard from Sanji before he started listing hundreds of things he loves about you

Honestly he said a bit much since he strayed off from personality and perks to more your physical appearance and more

You had to kick his leg under the table to get him to stop

Your dad put his fork down and looked at you

“I don’t want you dating him”

“Can i ask why?” you ask

“Sounds to me your boyfriend is simply a pervert. He’s probably just after your body”

Now this Sanji got upset at but you acted first

“Seriously?? Did you listen to anything he said just now? Yeah he appreciates my looks but he clearly loves me for who i am, do you only hear things that make you upset or something?”

You were hoping it would stop right there but no, of course your dad had to say some more huh

“Isn’t he just some chef anyways? Its not like they make a bunch of money, he’s probably mooching off of you”

You stood up so fast your chair was knocked down

“How dare you say that about Sanji? Hes not just some chef, he’s one of the best out there. That doesn’t even matter actually, good chef, bad chef, he would NEVER mooch off of someone. Using people, especially women is completely against his character! Sanji has been nothing but nice to you tonight, and here you are completely shitting on him!”

You huff and wave your hand, mumbling how you wanted some fresh air before heading outside

It was only a few seconds before Sanji joined you

“How are you doing love?” He’d ask and you’d whirl around and face him in surprise

“How am I doing? Sanji they were saying bad things about you! Im SO sorry about that, my dads usually not that much of an asshole and-anyways, How are you doing??”

He’d chuckle and assure you he’s fine

“I’m not gonna lie, i was pretty upset when he said i was using you for my own gain. But seeing you stand up for me, getting upset for me really warmed my heart.”

He’d give you a hug while slowly rubbing your back

“But what do i do about him not approving? What if he says to break up??” you ask and sanji tilts your chin up towards him

“Who cares? We are all adults here, its not like his disapproval will suddenly stop the love we have for each other.”

You slowly nod at his words and he smiles before giving you a quick kiss

“Now lets head back in and finish dinner” “Oh but its going to be so awkward now” you complain but you still walk with him back inside

When you guys return to the table, your mother shoves your dads shoulder which made him stand and walk up to Sanji

Before the blond can open his mouth, your dad is already apologizing

“Look, Im sorry about what I said. It was harsh and based on my daughters reaction, clearly untrue. I just dont like to see my kid grow up, much less dating someone. Just promise me one thing, Sanji. Promise me you wont break her heart” he says putting a hand out

Sanji gave him a nod and a firm handshake.

“I promise. I would never be able to live with myself if I did”

#ace x reader #sanji x reader #portgas d ace #vinsmoke sanji #one piece x reader #couldve just had them make fun of sanji's eyebrow or somethin but nooo i had to be dramatic smh #dumpling writes

133 notes · View notes

sodasback · 3 years

Text

Katsaridaphobia

ER Nurse Rafe x ER Nurse Reader

Sooo this is disgusting but it actually happened to me and I need to write an ER Nurse Rafe fic. I apologize in advanced.

But WARNING: this fic is not for the faint of heart. Mentions of a bug in a body cavity.

Also, I just want to mention: there are very few things that gross me out any more and even this wasn’t that bad for me when it happened, but it is for y/n because every nurse has a thing that still freaks them the fuck out. (Mine is eyeballs. Like exophthalmos or any time an eye is like not properly in its socket lol)

It was a Friday evening and you were SLAMMED in the emergency department. And as a new grad nurse you still struggled with your time management, so you, especially, were drowning.

Rafe having had a few years under his belt was barely breaking a sweat, while you as a people pleaser on the other hand, had a hard time cutting a patient off from telling you their life story. So Rafe noticed you struggling and of course, hated seeing you stressed.

Last time you were at work, Rafe had extra time so he looked at your patients’ charts and what needed to be done for your patients and just did it.

...You were pissed. You told Rafe you could never learn if you didn’t struggle and how you didn’t want your boyfriend helping you like that at work. That you wanted ownership over your nursing practice.

So tonight, Rafe came over to you as you were starting an IV, “you want me to hang your antibiotics for you for bed 4? Then, I can swab 6 and insert the foley for 9?”

“Rafe! Did you not hear anything I said last time?! I need to do stuff myself, I don’t need my hot shot boyfriend coming to save the day like I’m some damsel in distress. Treat me like another frickin nurse on the floor and not your girlfriend!” You all but yelled at him while your patient laid practically unconscious on the gurney as you started his IV.

“Wow. Okay. I was just trying to help. And for the record, I would have tried to help you catch up regardless of us dating because like it or not babe, you’re a new grad and frankly, you’re falling behind. So if you’re not gonna let me help you, you better step it up. But no worries, I heard you loud and clear.” Rafe shot back at you before he turned and left.

You immediately felt guilty. Rafe was just trying to help and you know he would have offered it, even if you weren’t his girlfriend. But you also became even more pissed. 1. Because you were stressed 2. You know he threw some of what he said in there because he was pissed too.

The rest of the shift you and Rafe kept sending each other dirty looks when you’d pass each other. But Rafe still had to stop himself from trying to help you. Instead, he focused on helping every other nurse on the floor.

At one point, you got another admission. An older homeless gentleman who had a whole mess of issues in addition to the fact that he was NOT well-taken care of. He had scabies which already gave you the heebie jeebies and then this happened:

“Okay sir, we got you set up with pain meds, fluids, antibiotics and a sandwich. Is there anything else I can do for you right now?” You asked.

“Well, there’s just something in my ear thas buggin me. Can ya look at it?” He asked, gesturing to his ear.

“Sure, let me look.” And as you flashed your pen light over his ear your heart dropped. You saw legs? And …wings? Oh my god. That is the ass of a cockroach sticking out of this mans ear.

Cockroaches were your BIGGEST fear. You immediately leaned back and shut your eyes tightly.

“Well? Is der somethin in there?” Your patient asked.

“Mhmm. Yeah…. There’s definitely something in there. I’m going to try to get it out. Let me go get some supplies.” You said, trying to remain as calm as possible.

You scurried toward the supply room where Rafe and Estephany were chatting. You closed the door behind you and they both looked at the distressed look on your face as you leaned your back against the door and took a deep breath.

“My patient has a cockroach in their ear and I have to get it out!” You blurted out quickly, mostly to Estephany because you weren’t talking to Rafe.

Estephany looked horrified. Rafe looked amused knowing you had an irrational fear of the insect after you screamed bloody murder and jumped on top of him when you saw one scurrying near dumpster as you walked downtown on a date once.

“Ewwww! That’s disgusting! How does that even happen?!” Estephany asked.

“I don’t know but I can’t do this.” You whined.

“Wish I could help you girl, but I’m taking my patient to CT.” Estephany said and left quickly and frankly did not sound sorry at all that she couldn’t help.

Rafe just stayed in his spot leaning against a shelf with his arms crossed and an expression on his face that told you he was both still mad, but also amused because he knew what was coming.

“Rafe?” You asked softly.

“What? Are you ready to apologize for yelling at me earlier?” He asked.

“No.” You declared indignantly and offended that he expected an apology.

“Oh, mkay then, have fun getting a cockroach out of your patient’s ear, rookie. I hope it’s not alive.” He said, starting to walk past you.

“Rafe wait. ...please? Can you help me?” You begged, not able to fake a tough front anymore.

“I’m sorry, I thought you didn’t want your hot shot boyfriend helping you at work?” He asked using your words against you.

You glared at him and let your shoulders fall as you took a deep breath, “Rafe, come on, you know this is my worst fear.”

His face softened ever so slightly, but he didn’t say anything. You swallowed your pride and pushed away your attitude that always made it hard for you to apologize.

“I’m sorry. ...I’m sorry I yelled at you and I know we all help each other here and that I especially am supposed to ask for help as a new nurse. I just get self-conscious when it’s you who’s helping me because even though no one knows about us yet, I don’t like feeling like I need my boyfriend’s help being a nurse. It’s just something I still need to work on.” You finished and peeked up at him and he offered you a small smile.

“I know. And I know you were stressed back there. I really did hear you the other day. I’m not going to help you more or do you things for you that you should do yourself just because were dating. I really am helping you with stuff I would help anyone with. You’re a badass nurse, but you really do need to ask for help before you get to the point that you’re drowning like you were tonight. We all need to ask for help, it’s not something you need to be ashamed of.”

“I know. ...Thank you.” You said sweetly.

“Alright, come on, let’s go pull this roach out of your guy’s ear.” Rafe said guiding you out of the supply room with his hands squeezing your shoulders.

“But you’re gonna do it, right?” You asked.

“Only because I’m scared you might literally pass out trying.” Rafe said.

“Thanks for always saving me Rafe.”

“You don’t need to be saved, Y/N. But I will always be here for you, promise.”

You let your heart melt before you remembered what you and Rafe needed to go do, so you squeezed his hand and then took a deep breath.

“Okay Joe, this is Rafe. He’s gonna help us get that thing in your ear out.”

Taglist: @moniamaybank @abbyj1822 @october-cameron @hernameisnoell @railmerafe @jeyramarie

#rafe cameron #ER Nurse Rafe #rafe x reader #nurse!rafe x reader #rafe x y/n #rafe x nurse!reader #Outer Banks #outer banks imagine #obx

49 notes · View notes