“There is no fuel more powerful than the passion for what your are doing so feed it regularly, light the flame behind the burn, and stay in the heat of it, as heat is engagement and engagement is forward motion, and forward motion is momentum, even when it is slow. Slowness stretches time. And time is the journey. And the journey is everything.” - @victoriaericksonwriter 🔥 Hey frands!! In a few weeks we start #LoveThruYourLegs yoga challenge and I would love to have you all join us 🤗 We’ll be focusing on standing balancing postures that build leg strength and focus! Who’s in? Can’t wait to start 💁♀️ Be on the lookout for the flyer, we’ll be posting sometime this weekend 👀! In the mean time here’s a quick little video 🎥 from @sawyerproductions to get ya pumped 😜💪 Also featuring a bikini 👙 from @saltthesoul, one of our fabulous sponsors, one of you will win something from her shop 🤭😍! I know y’all will kill this challenge and I can’t wait to see 🙌 #yoga #yogi #yogaeverdamnday #namaste #yogachallenge #igyogachallenge #workout #fit #fitspo #fitness #squatspo #squats #legday #fitgirls #motivation #beach #beachyoga (at Santa Monica, California)
4 notes
·
View notes
****** GIVE AWAY ALERT****⠀Overwhelm!!! 😆😍🎉🙏I am blown away by the response to @sittinprettystill 's and my yoga cushion + journal giveaway. Thank you for sharing your practice, your comments, your light with me. Every time I read a comment from one of you letting me know you have had your first experience of meditation or ability to quiet your mind with me on YouTube I get so excited! I remember when I was a newbie so curious about yoga, meditation, and journaling. I wanted to find my inner calm and change my life so badly. It's major magic to be now sharing these practices that have been transformative for me 10 years later, through my classes and trainings. For those of you that have not yet entered, below are the deets on how you can enter to WIN a @sittinprettystill meditation cushion and a 2018 Uplifted yoga planner and journal. Winner is announced tomorrow! Sending so much love to you all 💕 If you made into seated meditation (I did!) today, put a 🙏emoji below! ***ENTER****⠀ 1.Follow @sittinprettystill and @larkinyogatv⠀ 2.Like this photo⠀ 3.Leave a comment on how this special giveaway can help you⠀ 4.Tag friends to increase chance of winning⠀ Easy Peasy! A winner will be selected and announced on Thursday Good Luck!!!⠀ Must have USA shipping address to win⠀ ⠀ #upliftedyoga #abundance #affirmations #mindset #inspiration #yoga #yogaeverdamnday #yogalife #intuition #mantra #ritual #sacredspace #journaling
2 notes
·
View notes
The Lonely Feeling
Brene Brown writes in her book, Braving the Wildness “the lonely feeling is that moment when you don’t feel alive with connection.” Research goes further to talk about it as “the level of how society and our role or position (or lack of) a role/position can bring about or cause a sense of not knowing what group you belong to,” and therefore bring into light the lonely feeling. Just like hunger is a warning that our blood sugar is low and we need to eat and thirst warns us that we need to drink, loneliness tells us that we need connection, something as critical to our well being as food and water. Cacioppo explains, “Denying you feel lonely makes no more sense than denying you feel hunger.” Yet we often deny our loneliness.
I have a memory of being somewhere between the age of 11-13 where I am laying in the snow in the front yard of our house on Erie Street. I know my dad was still alive but I’m guessing very sick or going through a round of sickness that left my siblings and I heading in different directions. My brother and I would typically stay together, with my two younger sisters going somewhere else. It made sense given our age and where we were in our schooling, but as I think about it now - it was so traumatic. I image we were all just yearning for normal, togetherness and despite everyone’s efforts to help we were having anything but a normal experience.
So, there I am in the snow and it was DEEP (I need to research significant snow falls during this period of time). Nonetheless, I vividly remember laying in the snow, I can feel it coming up around me and despite how cold it was, it felt incredibly comforting. I also remember feeling loneliness for the first time that I could identify with. I put a label on it that day. It was the beginning of what I would define today as mild depression, but I had no idea then and I certainly had no clue of how to deal with it other than to isolate myself or retreat to my room. I carried depression with me for a long time, even to this day. What’s different now though is I don’t wrestle with it. I don’t resist when I feel it coming. I don’t run and do foolish things. I instead surrender to it.
In the yoga practice many teachers including myself talk about “surrendering.” I once associated this (and sometimes still do) with that feeling of euphoria, warm, soothing, ocean vibes where the sun is shinning and my body is completely removed from pain, suffering and worry. When “the lonely feeling” comes surrender is something entirely different. It’s a dark place. There is no warm fuzzy feeling, it’s scary. It’s painful, exhausting and filled with incredibly low emotions. Who wants to go there, right? Why would I when “the lonely feelings” come up, surrender to all of that? It’s simple really - what we resist persists and if I can have the courage, and vulnerability to know that this too shall pass, to work through it, then maybe, just maybe “the lonely feeling” will show up less frequently. I can tell you from experience I am noticing far less “lonely days.” I attribute this to sitting in the seat of discomfort, uneasiness, and the unknown. I’ve written about this in an earlier blog. I don't let the thoughts of others and the stories I tell myself become part of the fabric of my life anymore. I don’t ignore them but I most certainly no longer pitch a tent and stay for awhile with them.
When I am experiencing “the lonely feeling” I tend to go into a little hibernation mode. I take my yoga practice home instead of heading to group classes. I’m not running from you or your help or your love - I’m going deep into the cave of my heart to rest, reconnect, heal, learn and come out better than when I went in.
I want to be clear about a couple things.
1. I was never diagnosed with depression or anxiety (clinically)
2. I was given anti-depressants after the birth of my son
3. I no longer use prescription medication to help with my depression and anxiety but wholeheartedly believe it can help and should NEVER not be considered under the advice, guidance and direction of professionals
4. Finally, I am so grateful we’ve grown away as a society from thinking this is a negative stigma that shouldn’t be talked about.
Why this post and why now? Well, I recently had to surrender. “The Lonely Feeling,” came back recently and I could no longer avoid it. She is a force to be reckoned with. I tried fighting her but I knew all too well how this would turn out - so, I surrendered. When I felt tired, I slept regardless of the time of day. When I felt lazy, I moved through a gentle yoga sequence in my home practice. When I felt hungry, I ate. When I felt sad, I cried. When I feared I would self-medicate, I went for a walk, read a book, BAKED, listened to music. When I wanted to be angry, I took it out on my journal, and not the people I loved (at least I tried, there are a couple of you who might disagree, I’m sorry). Either way I didn’t put a time limit on it, I just surrendered. I went there and I told myself I will stay as long as needed.
When I’m in “the lonely feeling” I don’t want to surround myself with a bunch of people, I want connection but not with others. I want less on my calendar and more time wrapped in a blanket, getting a massage, sitting on my infrared mat and laying on my yoga. Now this can be challenging when you have commitments. During this time I’m not afraid to ask for help. See if someone will sub out my class and maybe cancel on you (you know who you are). Making these choices (for me) are the steps I take to climb back out of “the lonely feeling.” Every year it gets easier and each time a little less painful. I don’t know what to attribute this to other than my own knowledge. I know that when I used to resist “the lonely feeling” I would make awful decisions.
*spend money (I didn’t have)
*self medicate
*get in fights with people I loved
*over consume
*beat myself up
*shut down
*numb myself and become incredibly defensive
These things accomplished one thing and one thing only - temporary relief married with a deep level of guilt. Worse yet, it just buried what I was avoiding, which allowed it to come back bigger and more ferocious the next time. I know the exact moment I said no more to this way of “coping.” And yes, it was during a yoga class.
You see for me yoga heals everything. It’s my teacher, my medication, my chance at beginning again. It’s radical, powerful and transformational (if you want it to be). I know the moment I shifted into owning my own identity but I also remember clearly that this was also when “the lonely feelings” peaked. I’ve learned over many years that my greatest gift is who I am. The more I fought this reality the more I suffered. The more I tried to be someone else, it didn’t work. In part I think this is because the moment we decide to take control of our lives, others feel we’re either abandoning them or worse yet not the person they wanted us to be, or thought we should be. When this would I became more defensive, more numbing. I started to check-out, not check-in. It is also when I leaned into anti-depressants and self-medicating behavior. Thankfully, YOGA also started to intensify in my life. Thankfully I began to see that beyond the beautiful and strength building poses was a lifestyle that erased “the lonely feeling.” I was hooked.
YOGA isn’t for everyone but it’s definitely worth trying. Give it a month with full permission to hate it at first. Make it your non-negotiable and see what happens. Challenge yourself each day to sit in stillness, breathe and become silent so you can hear.
At 49 I can finally say, I know where I belong and after years of searching that feels good.
“if you could read my mind love, what a tale my thoughts would tell.”
I took these pictures on a “the lonely feel” day. They’re a reminder to me that what we see isn’t always what it is, don’t judge, just love. Grateful to the beautiful Camron Windy who made me feel safe enough to be in this space and allow this moment to be captured. xo
0 notes